#anyway they could have legit made so much money off of this show

[campbell-rose]

Helluva Fucking Rant: S2 E6 

OKay I’m a big fat liar and my pants are burning my ass rn, I know I said I’d do Rwby designs next but then the whole leaked episode drama happened and now it’s out and I need to complain. 

*Off the bat, I’m not going to talk pacing mainly because I have little experience with dealing with pacing (having never written anything more than comic strips lol). The episode didn’t feel too fast but anyway 

I’m going to organize this based on gripes I have per character. 

Fizzarolli: He is my baby. He's like kind of babygirl if that makes any sense. “Maybe I could burn the milk this time” 

I adore Fizz as a character. He’s not babified or infantilized like a lot of Viv’s other gay men. So far. Who knows, the writers have proven how adept they are at contradicting and retconning characters. But uhhhh what the fuck was he doing in Greed? Am I stupid? Like, it’s never spelled out. Is it for pr? Is it a deal with Mammon type thing? Is he promoting something? If he had somewhere to be why did he let his dogs run him all over creation??? Like, bit of an issue there as it’s only vaguely mentioned that he was practicing something. 

His backstory is like... acceptable I suppose. Not what I was expecting. I was expecting like, what we got, and a combination of some other theories I had personally. See, my issue is the fire and how imps have been shown in previous episodes to be, ya know, IMMUNE TO FIRE. Imagine if, and bear with me here huge stretch I know, imps are immune to fire and hellfire – but not holy fire. Like, shit straight from the angel’s burning halo type fire. That would make sense, since hellfire is a thing in pop culture and biblically accurate angels are all gold and flames! 

I do like the idea that fizz’s entire body is white from scars, however I think his scars need texture for the idea to sell. Maybe in full costume it’s covered with makeup, but come on people he was lit on fire, you ever seen a healed burn? Fizz being scared of the flames legit made me sad, I love him so much. However they’re trying to show he’s got like ptsd (maybe not exactly but still) from it, but it feels inconsistent to me for some reason. On a final note, he never should’ve forgiven Blitzo in any way, shape or form tbh, I would’ve preferred what Barbie did just straight up, I don’t like you, I can’t forgive you please leave me alone.  

Asmodeus: This cemented for me how much I fucking hate his design. His stupid head is so tiny and his body is built like a brick shithouse like, it’s so unbalanced and weird looking. I like his character here I suppose. No noticeable inconsistencies from his first appearance. His va is killing it tbh, love him so much what a king. 

I’m fine with his character, what I’m not fine with is the weird consent angle their going with. Like... he is the SIN of LUST??? Valentino is more of what I’d expect as the sin of Lust compared to Asmodeus. Also, the WEAKEST and most NON THREATENING SIN??? KESHADOG IS RIGHT THERE 

Crimson: He should’ve been hired by Mammon to get back at Asmodeus. Maybe Asmodeus has an unpaid debt with Mammon and has been shirking him so Mammon is like ‘i have your fucktoy now, give me my money or you won’t get him back’ 

Like his little video chat could’ve been context, like “You don’t know me, but you may know my employer – Mammon?” 

The paperwork would make sense then, Mammon is sending over contracts and bullshit Asmodeus has to sign. The importance of reading the fine print would be even more present because Asmodeus is dealing with someone on his level who can actually fuck him up, not some nobody imp he could kill with a glance! Crimson’s motive could be that Mammon offered him a share of Ozzie’s stock and would let him run some shit because Crimson has become a prominent member of higher society despite being an imp, which is the only reason Striker is partnered with him. 

Striker: Striker baby doll, please just fucking kill Fizz. Like, stop fucking standing there, kill the fucker. Omg I was so annoyed with his lack of action this episode. Both Fizz and Striker are incredible agile and snake like characters, this whole distraction song should’ve been a mix of striker trying to kill Fizz/Fizz avoiding him and Crim’s gang being just flabbergasted by the bullshit they’re witnessing. It’s been shown before that Crimson ony ever sits on the sidelines while his goons get killed so like????  

Anyway, Viv can try as hard as she wants to paint Striker as in the wrong and a bigot, but it won’t work on me. He’s completely in the right because imps are literally the slave/working class in this caste system. Fizz is (to imps in the slums and less fortunate) probably the epitome of a pampered lapdog plaything of the upper class. ANd that could’ve been something interesting to explore. Why not show the perspective of other imps that think like Striker, maybe have them be antagonistic to Fizz because he’s Asmodeus and Mammon’s pet, or maybe Fizz finds out that’s what people think of him and he’s horrified and that’s why he’s mad Blitzo calls him a whore. But no, because Striker is an evil bigot who sides with the evil woman Stella so nobody else thinks like he does. 

Also, his new va has the sexiest voice i've heard since live action Buggy or sub Crocodile so I'm not complaining about him taking up screen time

Him all disheveled is straight up working for me

Blitzo: Once again he gets away with being shitty and stupid and awful because he’s a woobie. Why the fuck was the crux of their hatred based on a birthday cake and the miscommunication trope??? I hate this so much.  

Was Blitzo in love with Fizz? Is that what that blink and you’ll miss it letter was? I’m getting very tired of this show having blink and you’ll miss it plot beats. That isn’t showing not telling, it’s like sweeping shit under a rug. Its like they think just because it was on screen for a frame the audience will catch it and be like ‘omg it happened’ or feel smart for catching something. Stolitz making up through text shouldn’t be a pause the video and read moment for fuckssake. 

I’m finding it very ahrd to tolerate Blitzo. On the topic of him though, I saw the leaked episode. WHY was Barbie taken out of the final flashback???

What the actual fuck???? Like... once again the women in this show are just shoved away and forgotten this is like Naruto level female character writing guys. Naruto had one good female character and she was still sidelined half the damn time. 

Also i fucking hate how this show can't be serious for more than five seconds like when Fizz and Blitzo hug and Blitzo is like 'haha wanna make out' i hate this but it isn't as egregious as having dildos during an abuse scene

Conclusion: Animation was amazing (also one of my fav animators KittenSneeze is an animator for Spindlehorse now like i love them so good for them), plot was whatever, characters are where the story falls, this won and I can’t anymore. 

Actually no, not conclusion. You know what really makes me hate Helluva Boss? It isn’t fair. I know that sounds childish and stupid, but who cares I’m childish and I’m stupid. Why is it that someone like Viv, who consistently doesn’t take criticism and is just a shit person all around gets rewarded for doing dogshit all the time. Yeah it’s a bit step for indie animation or whatever but she literally has Alex Brightman in her fucking pocket I don’t wanna hear it. Lackadaisy has earned it’s time in the goddamn spotlight, not Viv and her stupid creations. It’s so unfair. She got popular off of happenstance for her kesha sparkledogs and now she’s off bastardizing demonology and writing borderline backwards gay and female characters and she’s getting praised as the patron saint of queer rep and indie animation. Like, she doesn’t deserve it. Genuinely. I wish I could just post my demon story and people would just flock to it like flies to shit and shower me in praise and protect me from any criticism. But that’s not how real life works, but for some reason it is for Viv. Its just... I hate it. 

Anyway, baby rant over. This episode was like 7/10 tbh. It wasn't amazing but for Helluva Boss it was good. Sarcastic Chorus made a video about it that I'm gonna watch because honestly his takes could convince me this show is on Arcane's level lmao. Bye bye <3 

[stxrmylxve]

Hi hi

May I request tr boys reacting to a bilingual reader please 🏌‍♀️

ooo can i get my bilinguals along with me up here?? 🫶🫶🤪

MIKEY:

legit thinks its so cool

will ask you to speak just for fun in both languages

it lulls him to sleep too…?

loves hearing your voice overall

brags about it

definitely going to the country the language is from

shows you off there too 😑

DRAKEN:

doesn’t think much up it at first, but he quickly realizes you could be a good asset to have at the shop as well

you become like a third owner 😆

if you have kids, he is making you teach them the language

loves you sm 😭 ANYWAYS

uses you as his personal translator to insult people

its great :)

HANMA:

“you are a fucking beauty you know.”

first thing he says when you mention it

”…huh?”

thinks you are an absolute gorgeous being worthy of his love

AND you’re bilingual?? damn…..

you have him wrapped around your little finger

a sucker for bilingual people 🤷‍♀️🤦‍♀️

KOKONOI:

“oh, you can pull money for me then in other languages? sweet.”

so satisfied to get more money it’s bizarre

no it all reality tho

he thinks it’s so cool since he might be smart, not as far as learning all the way another language

math is his thing, not language learning…

does put forth the effort to learn parts, unlike nost of the others

MITSUYA:

he is probably bilingual too, let’s be honest here

if so, match made in heaven

if not, still a match made in heaven

he will try his best to learn most of the language

no matter the cost 😤

brags to his little sisters about you too 🤭

BAJI:

“the hell does that mean? Bi-len-gueal..? is that like.. a sexuality or somethin?”

has no clue what it is

once he learned what it is, he’s all for it

learns all of the curse words in that language for… research purposes

random out of pocket scene: learns the words to use during sex 💀🤚

outright calls you sexy if you scold someone in the language

best aggressive man there is

KISAKI:

hear me out

HEAR ME OUT

he likes it.

Whatttt???? he likes something? ik crazy

he finds it fascinating, though he knew about it before you even got together

that was one of the reasons he was so drawn to you actually

learned things here and there

didnt put a whole lot of thought into it

he has things to do 🧍‍♀️

but just know, he idolizes you for it

[inkdemonapologist]

*slides with a rare pair*

I think the fandom is generally not as big in rarepairs but I ended up shipping Joey with Nathan even after TIOL, I honestly believed they could have a good chemistry together. Either as a fluffy ship for joey to have a good pull on him from acting impulsively (since nathan is confirmed good) or as a legit evil business partners thing. The way Nathan was characterized in TIOL gives the impression he didn't know everything about joey but still was somehow very fond of him.

((randomly throwing that out there just because I think about it so much))

Sorry if its random ^^"

Golly gosh hang on OP I just need a minute to contemplate the idea of Joey x Nathan as a rarepair. LIKE… a majority of people I know in fandom agree that they had SOMETHING going on, so it feels like it shouldn’t be one, aND YET… I HAVE NEVER SEEN CONTENT FOR IT….. apparently i need to draw Nathan smooching Joey to fill this void……

Anyway, I DEFINITELY AGREE that the idea that Nathan had Feelings for Joey is really not hard to make a case for. You just point to that one TIOL footnote where Joey is like “Nathan likes creative people, he secretly wishes he were like us” and Nathan’s like “no I don’t, I just Like Joey So Much that I enjoy his creativity, isn’t it just like him to miss the compliment” and then congratulations you’ve made an utterly convincing case even BEFORE you get to the part where Nathan suddenly starts up an entire animation studio to keep his old friend’s dream alive, or that Nathan was someone who was close enough to Joey to “get the call” upon Joey’s death, or any number of examples of Nathan’s tremendously fond teasing in the other footnotes of TIOL. The little teasey note when Joey says "I always make fun of you!" and describes Nathan's face as "looks annoyed but isn't really" and Nate's like "yeah that's accurate". Nathan’s love for Joey is blatant and obvious, enough so that I was quietly shipping them even when I was part of the chunk of fandom that expected Nathan to be sinister; it’s just up to interpretation whether it was romantic, and whether it was requited.

Admittedly I do chafe a bit at the binary morality of “confirmed good” – most of what we can surmise from BatDR is that Nathan was Genuine. He genuinely worked hard, he genuinely loved his son, and he genuinely believed in Joey. He’s also, like, a mega rich guy who is obliviously putting a lot of that money to work in covering up his famous friend’s abuse and exploitation and Actual Murder of employees, so. No matter how well-intentioned he might be, if you're as rich and famous as Nathan Arch you don't get to just Not Realise Employees Can Be Exploited without being a little bit complicit for not looking harder. I don’t think it has to be an either/or of Good vs Evil – Nathan just strikes me as a well-intentioned and genuine guy who also has some serious blindspots, who maybe would just keep making excuses for his good friend as he learned more and more of the truth. And its INTERESTING when you consider him re-publishing TIOL in hopes of showing what he believed Joey was really like -- the charming man he liked so much. How did Nathan read TIOL and come to that conclusion? Joey's insecurity bleeds off every page, and Nathan admits in the footnotes that Joey makes things up, doesn't like to be corrected, might be lying in some of his stories, and has a habit of talking his way into what he wants even when he shouldn't. Either Nathan was SO smitten that he was completely blind to Joey's.... joeyness, or these were qualities that endeared Joey to him. He liked Joey being a bit of a scamp!

I’ve said before that my most deeply held unprovable BatDR headcanon is that Nathan was having an affair with Joey, and Wilson found out about it but Tessa never did, but I think that’s mostly fun for the characterisation it gives Wilson. When it comes to Nathan and Joey themselves, I absolutely headcanon Nathan’s affection as romantic, but I think I was more intrigued by their relationship back when it seemed like Nathan was going to be sinister! Like, if Nathan really had screwed Joey over in order to gain control of the Ink Machine like in some of those early theories, it would be delightful if all his footnotes were actually still true. If it's not just a performative “OH YES MY POOR DEAR DEAD FRIEND JOEY cool grab his stuff” motivation, but that the fondness is real, it just didn’t stop him – "you understand, old friend, business is business!" Obviously the story didn't turn out that way, but I think the possibility really grabbed me, haha.

It is kinda funny, though, that the way Nathan’s characterisation has turned out, you wonder what made Joey interested in him. Was it just the positive attention? Was it just his money? Nathan seems like such an easy mark (see: his reaction to the Lottie letters), and Joey isn’t very complimentary to him in TIOL, but he’s also reasonably fond, and brings Nathan up a few times as someone he counted on for advice that he actually took. Joey felt Nathan didn’t really understand him, but he seemed to value his friendship. This largely guileless, earnest guy who’s characterised as hard working……… who else do we know….. who might fit that description…………………… Joey Drew Stop Getting Involved With Married Men Challenge,

[hausofmamadas]

NUGGETS OF BENJAMAYO | aka just gif dump of my madness about 1 measly scene

✴︎

For Narcoctober's Day of Visuals - Oct 6th 5th (posted on the 6th cause I generally suck and my life is a mess) leftover from Day 1's fic

Okayokayokay so I made so many extra gifs for my Benjamayo fanfic that were theoretically set aside days ago for the Narcoctober Day of Visuals (I know that much like “fetch” Benjamayo is not a thing but much like the legendary Toaster Strudel heiress, Gretchen Weiners, I am very much trying to make it happen) and legit thought the prompt was Oct 6, not Oct 5 but I already have an amnesty day post technically I haven’t gone to sleep yet …? So technically yesterday is still today regardless of the date...? and I can’t not share these bc LET ME DO TELL YOU, I'VE THOUGHT ABOUT THIS INTERACTION FOR LITERAL YEARS NOW so without furtherado

The scene in question: Benjamin schmoozing at Dina’s wedding, shaking babies and kissing hands, spots Mayo and decides, fuck it- he’s in a good mood! Little social butterfly, precioso is feelin’ himself. It’s a wedding, love is in the air! Why not take a moment to go flirt chat with Mazatlan’s very own Camarón King of actual sex Not Giving A Fuck About Anything Pretty Much Ever, Ismael El Mayo Zambada and this is how it starts off. First, Mayo asks the waiter?/waitress? if the shrimp in the shrimp cocktail is fresh but manages to pose it in the most sexy way, it’s actually borderline disturbing just how fucking hot this man is asking about fucking shrimp of all fucking things then again, passion in one’s professional pursuits is pretty hot …? But like no, I really don’t think that’s what’s happening here

Then Mín, little pep in his step, La Reina del Baile, glowing even more than the bride herself, strolls up and basically is like, “Bish, that’s a spiffy new hat. You buy that with the money you made movin’ shit through my plaza? cause there’s more where that came from if you’re interested in a sugar daddy🤭”

At which point Mayo is lowkey like🫣 oh god, what do I say now. Is he trying to strong arm me, what’s the angle. I really don’t wanna start shit rn, I’m so full of shrimp, like ngl I don’t even think I could run away without making myself sick and he tries to keep things simpatico but like the extra mile he goes??? This sly mf is smiling at Mín in a way that resembles a little too closely how he smiled at the waiter/waitress. And sure, maybe we can chalk that up to just Mayo a ho. He a May-ho sry, I just– you know I set myself up to spike that ball and I couldn’t not no matter how bad it was sksksksks and Mín rolls with it, he does one of those blind-and-miss-it thousand yard stares which I will devote an entire gif set post to later bc he does it more than once throughout the show and it’s actually devastating and shoots his shot, “pero imagínate que no tuvieras qué”

So anyway, this establishes what? Mayo a May-ho, right. And Mín is lowkey liiiiiiiiiiiiving for this shit bc he thinks he’s got an in. And do you know what tf this savvy, spritely little Drug Lord Dilf-Nymph of Tijuana does????????? something Miguel would never dream of doing in a million years, not just bc he’s homophobic asf and deeply insecure about his entire general essence as a human being, but he doesn’t have a fucking f r a c t i o n of the affable, boyish charm that Mín does HE FUCKING FLIRTS RIGHT BACK. TAKE ONE GOOD GOTDAMN LOOK AT THE GIFS BELOW AND TELL ME HES NOT FLIRTING. YOU DONT FULL-BODY SCAN SOMEONE UP AND DOWN LIKE THEYRE THE FUCKING THANKSGIVING TURKEY AND YOU HAVENT EATEN IN DAYS UNLESS YOU’RE SEXING THEM IN YOUR MINDDKSSKSJWB I MEAMaaaan–

BUT DSKWJWJWIEIWJWJSB THE BEST FUCKING PART ABOUT THIS ENTIRE THING?????????? MAYO IS SO DOWN FOR IT. THE SHIT-EATING GRIN HE GETS ON HIS FACE LIKE MANS IS SO GODDAMN FLATTERED, MANS IS SO ABOUT IT, HES LITERALLY THAT GIRL DAFFYDUCK GIF, ALL BATTING HIS EYELASHES AND UNDRESSING SEDUCTIVELY, OKAY LIKE

WHERE IS THE LIE Spoiler alert: IT’S NOWHERE, THERE IS ONLY TRUTH OKAY and then Mayo does this real cute thing all appealing to the control freak in Mín, saying he likes to be his own boss, “no más que tú sabes” and all that AND THEN, AAAAAAND THEEEEEENNNNNNN FOLKS HE JUST. KEEPS. ON. MF. GRINNING. AS IF HE COULD GRAB MIN BY THE TINY LAPELS OF HIS TINY SUIT AND PLANT A BIG WET ONE RIGHT THERE ON HIM, RIGHT ON THE DANCEFLOOR IN FROMT OF ALL THOSE PEOPLELWKWJW W

and then he has to scramble for something else to say bc he knows good goddamn well that they've been making eyes at each other for far, far too long, so he's like "ohshitohshitohshit ohhhhh look there's Azul, the closest boner killer within reach besides Rayo hey, you know where home is!!!!!" AND THEN MIN, FUCJINGAKSJFNLKQJWELKJN DOES THIS WAY-TOO-INTIMATE HEAD NOD AND SMIRK, THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR COMING TO MY PARTY ERM IMEAN DINA'S WEDDING, IF YOU'RE EVER IN TOWN GIRL CALL ME

NO BUT EVERYONE LITERALLY SHUT UP AND SITDOWN ALL FIVE OF YOU BCTTHENNNNSI;RAJQPO23IJRPOQJIWEFOH THE WAY MAYO SAYS CLARO, AND IT'S THE EXACT WAY I WOULD IMAGINE LIKE HOW HE'D GOODBYE LOVE PAT A ONE NIGHT STAND ON THE SHOULDER AS HE'S OPENING HIS FRONT DOOR FOR THEM TO LEAVE ???????? IDK IDKIDKIDKDA;WOJEF;AOIJ AND THEN THE LITTLE PRIVATE LOOK OF LIKE "idk what the fuck that was but I'm- y'know i really didn't hate it......"

it just- i mean i'm sure we're all in agreement that i'm insane but like what other conclusions am i supposed to draw in the face of this raw, objective evidence

☇

taglist: @narcosfandomdiscord, @narcolini, @ashlingnarcos, @drabbles-mc

[bisluthq]

Saoirse: I want to do a big movie but they won’t cast me 😩

Also Saoirse: chooses Hanna over The Hobbit, doesn’t do her Barbie cameo because “she’s busy” with The Outrun when I saw her partying and on vacation while Barbie was filming, wouldn’t have been able to do Dune because of The Outrun (there’s no way they would’ve moved that because they always talk about how hard it is to get indie films made), doesn’t have social media, barely does any promo

like I get that though because I’m like “I want to publish a book” and I mean I’m a published writer who has earned a solid amount of money from publishing writing so it’s literally not an absurd dream right like as most people I tell this to say like I… could lol. My ex and her mum have published books and would both connect me if I asked. Even that one guy I fucked like twice who’s a show runner/very acclaimed TV writer was even like “if you wanted to do it as a screenplay of that idea - it’s a fucking good one - I’d be happy to connect you” like nothing is stopping me except laziness lol and I feel like Saoirse is the same lmao.

and much like Saoirse it’s not that I don’t do other stuff like I scaled back work for my whole little meltdown incident last month (and Dr Blank Space says I shouldn’t call it that because it’s more serious than that but also she’s become a bit of a killjoy recently - guess it comes with being like a fellow in emergency medicine rather than a med student/intern but like her and I were out two weeks ago which is when I implemented the “one very low alcohol drink a week is okay” rule because she was like “look, I want to have a beer and I’ll have a light beer with you and you’ve shown me your test results and shit and you’re not an alcoholic so as long as we have one light beer each and you go home and take your meds I’m supportive of this as you returning to normality after a really horrible time” and I said cool and she said “but you know Mr Bislut can’t even have a light beer with the pills he’s on like don’t see this as a he can have some” but the joke is he’s been having drinks now and then and seems ok? Anyway that was a sidebar in terms of updating y’all on my life and how the girl who legit introduced me to ❄️ which I don’t even do became the biggest buzzkill alive).

so after that sidebar like it’s not that I don’t do other work stuff and post that whole situation I’m back to like probably about 5-6 hours teaching a day because I’m quite specialized in terms of my qualifications and certifications and shit and these kids need me and over and above that I’m always doing a little bit of copywriting like even when I took that time off to work on the house but also lmao like come on writing a book seems hard.

and for Saoirse being in a big movie seems equally hard.

It’s privileged and it’s lazy but I get her.

[lesbiancharliedalton]

that sims family was so intricate to the point i could write a legit series of novels about them. i made them in like 2018? i think. and it started with just a normal married couple and they were boring but they gave birth to two kids and then the daughter became a painter and the son justin became a struggling standup comedian who married his high school sweetheart. his wife chelsea was a workaholic programmer and provided for the family while he went to open mics and tried to make a living. meanwhile they gave birth to a son and a daughter. eventually he had his big break and became a successful standup comedian. he was also constantly struggling with unmedicated bipolar disorder.

but then he OBVIOUSLY became an alcoholic and couldn't do shows without getting trashed beforehand and he'd come home and drink. but he was so successful (alongside his wife who was making a killing as a programmer at a thriving startup/doing her own projects on the side) they got to move into a big house. but the whole time justin was just getting trashed. and eventually his son travis (yes i know what their names are LMAO fuck off it was my bad) was in high school and started hanging out with the Wrong Crowd. so he started selling weed and eventually coke.

justin found out his son was selling drugs and got upset but then they made a deal where his son would provide him with free cocaine in exchange for his silence. chelsea was too busy being obsessed with her job to notice.

meanwhile their daughter norma inherited her dad's bipolar disorder but channeled it into her creative pursuits.

travis eventually grew up and moved out to be roommates with his childhood best friend rowan? i think was his name. the green hat guy. and anyway even though his dad was a famous standup comedian he chose to live in squalor in a really shitty rundown trashed apartment. rowan sold drugs alongside travis in this shitty apartment and they'd always have girls over and have threesomes with them. travis had no desire to follow in his dad's footsteps or take advantage of his family's wealth and just wanted to be a bartender with sleeves who got high all day.

norma also grew up and moved to the city but started acting and struggled for a bit but eventually her nepotism got her ahead and she became so super famous that she got to move to a giant mansion in the hills with her boyfriend who she met on set. her boyfriend was much less successful than she was. she eventually won the sims equivalent of an oscar (i forget what it was called lmao) and they had a child but never got married.

MEANWHILE. travis accidentally knocked up one of the girls he'd been casually seeing on and off since high school who was working as a barista/camgirl. she claimed to not know whose baby it was but everyone knew it was his. she said she was too poor to take care of the baby (avery) and moved in with travis and rowan. but then one day she said she couldn't do it anymore and RAN OFF leaving travis and his roommate to raise a TODDLER in what was essentially a drug den where they sold weed, coke and molly.

finally after months of struggling travis broke down and asked his dad for the money he'd been turning down for so many years which his ailing alcoholic father obviously gave to him with no questions asked and travis moved out to the desert in a big house with his toddler daughter to start a new life. he still worked as a bartender but at a fancier place and he finally accepted his father's help.

i think i covered all the basics there.

[claire-starsword]

The Guardiana Magic School Run - Part 8

Well, last time was tough, but at least now we get to chill on a little sea voyage.

Except of course we don't. Let's go beat up some zombies instead I guess.

Sadly, the chapter ends as soon as we finish Shade Abbey, so this is our last chance to buy stuff. I still don't have enough money for the Zombie Charmer nor got to win it in yesterday's disaster bonus, but I don't care much. Everyone is hitting hard enough in this team by now, my worries for the next battle are all defense-wise. The Charm Ring will not help because none of the enemies use magic, but it's our last chance to buy them so I'll get a last one anyway. It goes to Gong because I'm still mad. I did check the deals section beforehand, there's nothing new.

The bonus is just money so it's not that pressing, but (hubris incoming) eight turns does not sound like much in a tiny battlefield like this.

Max being alone there worries me little because he's overpowered. Anri and Arthur starting in the front though is a horrifying sight. Thankfully we're all faster than the enemies.

See, there's no need to worry.

Also I just remembered Max is already up for promotion, I honestly have no clue if it's better or not to delay his promotion or whatever, I tend to just promote people whenever they start finding weapons that require promotion. Spellcasters however have a problem in this version that I'll explain later when we aren't, you know, in the middle of battle.

"Yes, we can always make time for a lesson."

"But let's clean up the classroom first."

I'm curious as to how much the Zombie Charmer would be doing, but as you can see the Power Staff is doing just fine.

This guy however is hopeless. Jk, the skeletons do have greater defense. And he's only 3 exp away from his first level up, so any scratch counts. And he indeed gets it next turn, honestly there's not much else to talk about, this battle is super easy compared to the last one, Max isn't talking much damage even when poisoned, and the enemies are downright turning to avoid other characters sometimes, it's ridiculous.

Arthur's level up gives him +0 attack and +0 defense.

sigh. we have a long way to go with this guy.

In the meanwhile Tao continues to have so much fun. The skeletons only take 6 damage though, so there's definitely some resistance afoot despite the game not showing it. Usually that's the case for elemental resistances, but that's weird since fire is often advertised as the element good against undead.

We're at turn 5 and only the Ghoul is left.

Max clearly won't have any trouble unless this thing has absurd attack or something. He also levels up, but gets very little stat increase. I feel Max should be promoted early because his epic level ups have chilled by now.

Which feels weird, because you can see growth rates in this version and, aren't the attack/defense/speed ones implying they grow better at late levels? That's kinda the opposite of what's happening.

Hey, that's more than I expected! Despite being the boss, the Ghoul still has less defense than Skeletons. Arthur gets another level up for his efforts, gaining +1 defense.

Like, just that. 1 stat point. Oh Arthur.

Again his curves imply the opposite of a late bloomer to me, either I'm messing up badly at reading these or there's something wack here.

Also I forgot the Ghoul could do this. This man can't catch a break, but I was actually gonna let others get the exp anyway. Sleep man. Dream of better boats.

Hey, again with this! Stop lying to me about resistances! (Anri used Blaze 1 here).

Because of this nonsense, it takes an extra turn for Anri and Arthur to finish off this guy, but we still get the clear bonus with a turn to spare, because we're that awesome.

Anri also reclaims a relic of Guardiana from the undead forces. I'm legit wondering if he's the only one to drop this, in which case it's very interesting, is this guy supposed to be the real priest? I'd expect zombies to be made from older corpses. Though there was a whole line of Anri relatives buried here anyway. Why am I discussing lore in the middle of a challenge run, see this is what happens when the battle is too easy.

Let's move on, not that there's much else here, we say hi to Amon and Balbaroy and head to Bustoke, ending the chapter. I find it kinda weird that Balbaroy says "let us know when you're ready" but you're not given a chance to get back to town. Feels bad.

But in the end it's good that the post is short so far. We have business elsewhere after all.

And that business deserve it's own post actually. See you soon :)

Losses: 0 Deaths: 2 The expected deaths on Narsha interludes: 0/3

[atopearth]

Ken ga Kimi Part 2 - Kei Route

So apparently there's four endings so I guess I'll just follow my walkthrough and do it in the order of fortune, harmony, wild and then strange I think. The first two are "kimi" endings where the LI chooses Kayo above all else and the latter two are the "ken" endings where the LI chooses his sword above all else. Apparently fortune is the general "happy" ending but I guess it depends on what you think as well?🧐 Anyway! Kei time~ ooh I like how when you make a choice, it shows what colour it represents and basically what ending you're heading for. Hearing Kei call her Kayo was actually really sweet for some reason haha, it makes my heart flutter a bit for her haha. Kinshirou witnessing Kei being cool by paying off that Saburouza guy's debt was nice, like dangg 10 ryou has to be quite a bit and he gave it to them just like that. Lmao when he tried to offer Kei his daughter, like geez dude, stop making your daughter something to sell off lol. It's sweet to know that Kayo trains with the naginata because it makes her feel closer to her mother since her mother trained in it as well and often took her to the dojo she went to. Lmaooo when Kei had enough of seeing Enishi flirt with Kayo and kicked him away from her😂😂😂 Okay, I didn't expect everything to go downhill like that. It's frustrating that Kayo apologised to Kei for saying too much but Kei refused to think from her perspective and just viewed her as naive and thoughtless. Yes, Kayo is probably naive, but I expected better from Kei even if her words about him swinging a sword just for money probably hurt him. I know he just wanted to protect her but now that she's crying, what was the point, Kei?! Yeah, swords are a weapon but what you use it for depends on you. At least he's sort of reflecting since he can't get Kayo's look and her words off his mind.

Kinshirou's attempts in trying to make the kid (Yanohiko) stop crying was so funny haha hahaha. Aww, Kei carrying Yanohiko on his shoulders so he could see stuff was really cute. Anyway, I really love how so many side characters have character sprites!! It makes the story flow so much more nicely actually seeing characters aside from the main characters. I'm so glad Kayo and Kei made up, they really are like little kids needing a bit of a push haha. Kei is definitely the bigger kid though, since Kayo properly apologised on her own initiative. Madara and Hachimoku are so cute as humans!! I find it kinda slack that the others kinda made it seem like Kei was such a monster for pushing Suzukake away and hurting him. Like yeah, he didn't apologise for it and just ran off blah blah, but they or well Kayo and Kamuro should also understand that Kei is never honest, but also that even though Suzukake was just trying to be nice, he was invading Kei's personal space and he's a person that doesn't like being close with others so it should have been expected tbh? I can understand why Madara and Hachimoku are so mad though, since Suzukake really did get hurt when he was just trying to be nice. LMAO at Kei continuously eating beans because he didn't know how to reject Kayo's dad's kindness even though he gets itchy from it, legit died when he ran away saying "no more beans!!"😂😂😂

I'm so happy they finally talked properly!! Kei properly apologised and even realised that he was forcing her to understand his perspective on his reason for using a sword by getting her to watch him fight in the tournament, when he should have just been honest with her and talked with her. Suzukake is such a sweet kid to properly apologise to Kei even though they're about to fight loll. Awww Keo's headband is sewn by his grandma, that's so sweet. So cute how Kayo is learning sewing from Kei's grandma now, love how honest the grandma is about wanting Kayo to be her granddaughter🤣 I'm impressed at how good Kei has become at expressing himself now. He still accidentally shouts at Kayo when things get serious (e.g. regarding his grandma's health) but he also properly apologises now instead of just brushing it off. Sadly, I got spoiled that Kei is an oni, so it wasn't surprising to me, but I think what shook me was when he said what's wrong with desiring more power. Kei had to hide his true self all this time because oni aren't allowed to wield swords, and not only that but his parents, his village and everything was destroyed by humans, and to this day, oni are discriminated for being who they are, so yeah it was kinda thoughtless of Kayo to say why didn't Kei tell her, like how could he?! I found it really cute how they both hugged each other and cried their hearts out together though, I think Kei really needed it since he's definitely been holding back his feelings about his past this whole time. The CG of them holding hands with Kayo quietly staying by his side listening to Kei's story just felt very soothing even though it's a sad story. I didn't expect Kei to actually be royalty though, no wonder why he wants to be the one to get rid of the ban on swords for oni. I guess I never really thought about why Kei was always so standoffish and distant to everyone but this is very understandable considering who he is. Getting close to people could allow them to discover what he is just like Kayo did and that's very risky. Kei really is too soft and kind, the reason why he let Kayo into his house and learn to sew was because he couldn't refuse after seeing how happy both his grandma and Kayo both were to share that time together.

I feel sorry for Tsuzumi and Nanae. Tsuzumi just wanted to repay his debt by protecting Choushichirou, and Nanae just wanted to follow Tsuzumi, and now they've gotten involved in this crazy ritual where even Asakura was brainwashed about it enough to want to sacrifice Nanae to the Marebito so they can revive Tadanaga. I honestly thought Kei's grandfather was dead so I didn't expect him to come back with a fiancee for Kei too, like whattt!! I also didn't expect things to affect Kei so much that he wouldn't be able to go to the tournament!! He's been aiming to win that for so long!! Kayo not being able to handle her feelings as well as face Kei and his fiancee was actually really cute lol. I'm glad he cared enough about Kayo that he went all the way to her house to try and fix the misunderstanding though. I'm glad there's no love triangle or responsibility thing and that Kureha actually came all the way here to meet her lover! That is actually very sweet, and I'm so glad she smacked some sense into Kei telling him to be more honest with himself and not let his chance at love get away from him since it's not like a sword tournament where there's a guarantee that there will be another one next year or whenever. Hahaha, trust Kei to shout at Kayo saying how much he likes her and that he didn't give up his dream and has just understood that there are other ways to fulfil it without being so obstinate about doing it that way. And I agree, I think cultivating a bond between humans and oni will help being the first step to bridge the discrimination rather than giving them swords back. Zantetsu was the guy Shiguragi was working with or protecting right? I'm surprised they were dealt with so easily by having Sakyo and Kei co-operate with each other. Sakyo is so terrifying as usual when it comes to oni lol.

Omggg I didn't expect Kei to be so sweet. I love how he told Kayo he wanted her to be his wife and he was thinking about how he should tell her father because he wants to take her with him back to his hometown. Kei tried so hard to tell Kayo's father how much he wanted to marry her, I'm so heartbroken that Kayo's father is so against it because he's an oni even though it's understandable😭 It hurts so much because we've seen how much Kei has opened up to Kayo and how much they care for each other so now I'm sad 😭 I know it's naive to think that you can change the mind of someone's parents to accept you in real life, so I really enjoy seeing it in games haha! Kei doing anything he can to get Kayo's dad's approval because he understands the importance of family itself and because he knows how important Kayo is to her dad and vice versa is very touching. The CG of Kei holding the yamabuki flowers fulfilling Kayo's dad's condition was so pretty~~ I think what I liked best about this ending was how well Kayo knew and understood Kei as a person. As Kei sought to prove to Kayo's dad through his actions how much he loves Kayo and how much he is willing to do to cherish her and marry her, Kayo was also trying her best to get her father to understand the type of person Kei was, and how much he meant to her, and I think that was nice. Aww it's sweet to see Tsuzumi and Nanae happily married here in Kei's country. Kayo looks so beautiful!!

Aww the fortune ending is pretty cute. I like how yeah it was pretty cliche with how Kei and Kayo handled the guy trying to kill Kei because his daughter was killed for being an oni, and it was because Kei has been trying his best to have humans and oni live together in peace that some humans have become more cautious and trying to find oni that are hiding as humans. It's actually really sad, but I think Kei as a king is really nice in its' own way because of how strong his heart is and how determined he is towards creating a better place for oni in this world. I also think both Kayo and Kei liking each other more and more for how cool they both are to each other is so cute hahaha. Omg that harmony ending legit broke my heart. Which part of this is harmony?! Initially, I thought it was so cute how Kei and Kayo wrote letters to each other secretly, but then when Kei was revealed to the town that he is an oni, and then when he honestly expressed how much he loved her but felt like he was ruining her life by wanting to be loved by her as an oni, it made me want to cry. They just simply want to be together😭😭😭 It was really sweet to see Kayo learn that her father was the one who gave them the chance to continue communicating through letters because he saw how physically tolling the whole thing was on her health and he couldn't bear to see her like that. They ended up basically eloping, but I'm happy for them and I love the kiss CG! Honestly, even though it's more sad than the fortune ending, I think I preferred how bittersweet this ending was. I think it really conveyed to me how much they really wanted to be together, enough that seeing them actually get to be together was very heartwarming. But man, it was so hard to watch Kei be so hated and feel guilty that his existence and his race is making Kayo suffer too. But I was also so happy for them at the same time because they refused to give up on their love for each other no matter what.

Unrelated but I reallyyyyy hate that KgK has the jump to next choice function BUT it skips unread text as well, like what is the point!!! Initially, I thought the story was the same for all endings but apparently it does have changes so now I'm hoping I didn't skip too much😭😭 Guess I'm stuck with just the skip function then, sigh... Kamuro is such a bro, I love how in the ken endings, when Zantetsu reveals to everyone that Kei is an oni, Kamuro just gets mad that Kei thinks he would treat Kei differently after knowing it. How unexpected that Kamuro actually isn't human either! It kinda hurt to see Sakyo demean Kei when he was going on a rampage trying to kill the oni. My heart hurt for Kei😢 It was obvious that Zantetsu and Shiguragi would have an "understandable" reason for hating humans, but it's just saddening to have to see so much hatred go around whether it be from humans or oni, especially when there are people like Kei who want to change things. Seeing Kei receive the "honour" of being able to carry a katana and have oni also be able to carry one as long as they're samurai was very fulfilling. It really felt like he achieved his dream and that's something that was missing in the more romantic endings. Okay, I hate this ending. Kei had no reason to die such a terrible death, especially by dumb people like that, I'm so annoyed. How dare they spout about happiness while killing someone. Even if Kei was evil, that was disgusting. I honestly hope they suffer for the rest of their lives if they think that they deserve happiness after killing another person. Honestly, I was expecting more tragedy in the strange/mysterious ending but it was so wholesome, I loved it!! I thought it was so cute to see all the guys and Kayo's family cooperate together to make them both be honest and say that they only love each other and want to be together for the rest of their lives. On the other hand, I'm really happy that Kei is being relied on by the oni and working hard at cultivating their relationship with humans in town. I nearlyyy wanted to hit Kei when he shouted at Kayo after she waited for him for so long! I'm glad he made up with her super fast and told her his reasons. It was so sweet seeing him propose to her so cutely and be so honest about how much he wants her in his life. It made me want to tear up haha!

Overall, I enjoyed Kei's route much more than I thought I would haha! His attitude can be annoying and frustrating at times but I really loved seeing how hard he tried to have Kayo's father accept them and their relationship. He's pretty much a tsundere but I think he and Kayo complement each other well because they can both be so stubborn but still try their best in their own way to communicate to the other because they like each other and they want to be with each other. I think him being an oni was "sad" in the sense of the discrimination, but I really liked how he never faltered when it came to fighting for their rights. Anyway, Kei is definitely really cute, and I love how he blushes when he's trying his hardest to show Kayo how much he cares for her, especially when he was so insistent on eating her cooking even though he wasn't able to eat the food lol!! So adorable and sweet haha! They’re definitely super cuteee together haha.

[nathank77]

4/6/24

10:04 p.m edited 10:34 p.m

Idk If it was you, I stopped my stream around 27 minutes in.

I put my glasses on when I saw the viewer go to 1 just incase it was the girl of my dreams.

It may not have been you. Idk. I question everything I think bc of psychosis when it comes to things that I can't prove factually.

All I know is I made that post about what was public on your fb and you put back up the family reunion photo. The part of me that has accepted the label of crazy or psychotic, is like you had a visual hallucination and it occluded it before the post.

The other part of me is like stop labeling yourself, maybe Elise didn't show up on my stream. I don't know.. but you didn't have a visual hallucination that occluded the family reunion photo and she really is here.

If you're here being how personal my blog is, I can't imagine you aren't in love with me. I mean of course you could be a concerned caring friend but-I mean I talk about hsv2 potentially being a diagnosis, I post almost naked photos, I talked about that dream I had where we made love, etc.

Why would a caring friend who feels bad for me subject herself to reading my personal diary? Especially every single word.

I do think you're here Elise and I'm not asking you to do the things I asked you to do in that post where I wanted direct answers. I understand why you don't want to. Especially if you've been here longer than since February...

I doubt that, but I remember seeing your following go up and down and your link being posted and removed when I was in Andover and Southbury... I chalk that up to visual hallucinations before I got full on psychosis...

But you very well may have been here since like June.

All I know is I believe you've been here since February 2024.

I still question my sanity bc sure my brain could have went you posted that and now you can see the family reunion photo but I'm not really someone who has visual hallucinations enough at this point in time.. that I'm aware of... I see black specks in my vision when I take my glasses off but that very well may be bc I need my glasses...

I did feel like I felt you on my stream, I put on my glasses all awkwardly for a reason but... idk... I can't go off a feeling. I can only go by what I see with my eyes....

I see you put up the family reunion photo within a hour of my post. I want to trust my eyes.

If you're here I know you love me. I hope you go to the Southbury Tango. I'm going to be incredibly awkward. I'll wear my glasses just incase you're here and you do show up.

I got to organize my finances bc of the cost to get in..... and I got to give you at least a week so you can arrange your life.

Tbh I'm considering using my 30$ in kohls cash that expires in like 10 days to buy more boxers. I could get 12 more pairs and 6 pairs of socks for like 160$. I won't need boxers for a long time but I got to make sure I can swing it, bc I'm at 250$ on my creditline and I'm up to 100 on a different one and I got to make high payments for the next 4 months to not accrue any interest.

I also have to determine how much it'll cost me in gas to get to Southbury.... idk if you'd show up and I'd only go once. I may even give you two weeks bc you're a Mom...

It's on meet up, and you have to rsvp I believe. I want to find you Elise. Idk how but I can't just show up places without having intentions like a dance class or a singles event or a hike...

So yea I do believe you're here and I can't wait 2 more years. I'd legit do anything to see you but stalk you or force you to see me.

I hope I'm right that you need to run into me somewhere. I hope that when I register for the Southbury Tango meet up you do too even if you show up in the driveway and step out of your car and I lose my money... it would be worth every penny to be able to look into those beautiful blue eyes again.

Anyways. I'll keep you updated. I don't expect you to go and idk what car you drive. I feel like it was a blue Subaru but idk. I know you told me. My memory is impaired from microsleeping and psychosis....I still remember all our moments though and what you told me about your life.

You'd have to step out of the car if you didn't actually register to attend. I don't know what you drive.... but yea.. I'm going to stop talking now.

Maybe you are just a concerned friend. Somehow I doubt that. Somehow I think you're my soulmate and we are like star crossed lovers..

Except we don't have to be star crossed lovers. We dont need to be kept apart. I meant it when I said, we can be friends first, we don't have to talk about tumblr or Instagram or any of it.

I'd want to build a strong friendship with you and grow into a beautiful relationship. I'd like to watch us grow and get married. Starting at friendship is important. I always valued that. Anyways I love you girl, and I'm sorry if I'm wrong about everything but I think I'm right.

[payservewomen]

Yesterday was a painful one….I’m off work Sun-Mon(todays tuesday) and was gonna go 2the $ store, and check goodwill for a shoe rack…But then I opened twitter😔

Goddess Aurora James tweeted something, and ofc that did it! Was around 12noon, maybe late as 2pm, and I began playing with my “Mr Winky”(Ex fiancée, Emma used to call it that; painful breakup, good 2remind myself 2b humiliated) and next thing I know, it’s damn near 8pm!

I’m broke af right now…last i checked, had $15 in the bank, so that means I can’t get any interaction with anyone who matters(dommes/women in general, even Hung Alphas) And that really got me desperate…..I crave attention soooo much….and when you’re a pathetic failure, a beta loser, well, only logical attention is negative ofc.

Oh! But the “wall of shame” girl DMed me, telling me it was time for her weekly wall of shame that she posts on twitter….I’ve been in a few of them, but it’s not too humiliating tbh, she edits the photos, and doesn’t show cocknballs…but my face is showing! I do wish that i’d stop tempting fate to expose myself as the perverted loser freak that I am! I sent her a link to a shared folder on google photos, and loaded that folder with tons n tons of very humiliating pics…dunno if she used any, but then i went to a different twitter account, same one I’d posted to last week, when I went to the store in running shorts(tiny ones with slits up the sides! But i’m glad i found these; they’re actually men’s legit running shorts! even tho I’m only ever gonna wear them cuz i’m a perv, desperate to show off my gross body n be laughed at, it’s better cuz I can act like i’m normal, and just exercising)

But this time….SMH, i posted the link to the folder…..the cover photo of it was from when Natti Banks made me crack eggs all over my dirty bedroom floor…then slurp them up, spit it back into my hands, and rub it all over my face. Then humped my hand for a couple hours while the egg dried, oh and this was AFTER i’d taken a shower!

I tried cleaning it all off, but even the next day, kept finding crusty bits of egg on my face etc

I can’t believe how many beyond embarrassing photos i put in that folder! I’ve exposed myself before of course, but many of these pics had my FACE! And plenty of them….so any kind of lies or explanation to someone who knows me….wouldn’t even be slightly believable.

Reminds me of…last year at some point, when I’d occasionally talk to “Riya Payel” To this day, still THEE goddess I worship above all others….Well, tough to say really, I prob do worship Aurora more…..and hopefully gonna see her this weekend! Omfg i cannot wait!

She’d tweeted about how she “still wanna jump a sub with my friends” 🥵🥵

Fuck I hope they do that! Maybe tell her where I’ll be at a certain time(or she tells me where imma be) and not a particular time and place, so that it’s more of a legit “getting jumped” kinda thing!🥵

Anyway! Back to Riya….the only one who’s absolutely, definitely without question, sadistic. When texting with her, I could actually tell when she’d orgasm! Could even sense a teeny tiny lil bit of guilt, which, if you’d seen what she’s said and done, you’d find hard to believe!

She was always very clear- “I want to destroy you. I want to leave you with nothing, broken, no self esteem, no self worth, no money…I genuinely hope to make you homeless and ruin your life”

Isn’t an exact quote, but she’s def said all that!

Many many findommes on twitter will say this shit, but their actions don’t match their words. But riya? If anything, her actions are somehow worse than her words!

I still cannot truly comprehend how any human could have such venom and hatred in them….(well tbh, i’m almost positive she’s been abused; sexually or otherwise) and whew, ngl, it’s not easy to think about my experiences with God Riya😔

Reminds me just how fucked up I am, mentally/emotionally and ofc sexually. When Riya blackmailed me, she did it 100% without my consent. She knew how much money I had, but since cash app allows you to keep sending, she made me send $18 to her, over and over and over and over…..At a certain point, we both knew that every single send would cost me the $18 PLUS $31 overdraft fee!

She loved that…that’s why it was only the low $18 send!

Last I saw, Riya’s bank account was close to $500k…yes, half a million!

She was also always very clear about the fact that any amount of money that my broke ass could send, wouldn’t even be noticeable to her……Most dommes say that, but with many, it’s quite clear that’s not true…..But riya? Genuine sadism. She’s every pathetic beta loser jerkoff/findom/humiliation addicts dream!

She broke me so badly….I prob sent her a hundred different voice memos…at a certain point, i got serious like “Hey, I understand that maybe i’ve implied that i’m ok with noncon blackmail, but please know, at this point, I’m not ok with what’s happening. I say this with all due respect. Please understand that I sincerely mean every word i’m saying. This has gone way too far….I’m not blaming you, and ofc will not report you or any shit like that….It’s just that well, I’m in serious financial and mental/emotional trouble right now….I’ve said “I’m gonna kill myself” many many times since seeing those photos on my employers FB and IG…I understand that you get off on causing me pain, and I promise that I’ll always be a punching bag for you…but please, I’m scaring myself rn, i’ve never felt like this and I truly terrified of what may happen…I’m coming to you, as one human being to another….I’m reaching out to you, asking, from the bottom of my heart, please help me”

Is essentially what I’d said, many times in various ways…..at this point, there was no longer any reference to anything sexual on my part….This was far beyond that….she took me to another level of self hatred, and my god, I can’t even describe the feeling of such loathing one’s self.

I even began talking to her about the idea of quenching her thirst for sadism in person!

She seemed receptive to it, which ugh, ngl, was exciting to me! She’d never seemed open to it in the past, probably cuz she’s had sooooo many twitter, sextpanther, etc accounts banned…I think eventually every site decided to permanently ban her, considering they must’ve gotten so many complaints from ruined losers. They’d contact her thinking of “blackmail fetish” or even just findom….since sooooo many dommes on twitter say all the same shit that she says, they figured they were safe🙄

Not only does Riya love inflicting real pain, but she’s even said that she’s addicted to it!

Imho, after following her for so long….she definitely means that…I’d imagine it’s even been problematic for her life!

It’s gotta be one hell of a rush! I know it was on my side of things, having myself posted, naked, on my employers social media accounts….being told the pics will be taken down….after i pay $100 for each one….Ofc she knew i not only had no money, but was already very negative!

So, she demanded I open up accounts on apps like Dave, Bridget etc..I began to make one and she got impatient…then simply asked for the info she needed to do it herself….I might’ve hesitated once(or prob just didn’t see her message) and she wasn’t having it, and posted more on my employers IG, along with asking “is this an employee of yours?” With my full legal name. I can’t remember the exact order of things, but suffice it to say, she taught me real quick that she’s in charge, and I’d better comply…So I kept getting text messages from the various creditors, and she expected the pin numbers IMMEDIATELY, which ofc she got…..Also she ofc had all my debit card info, and then i began seeing transactions come through my account somehow! When it had no money whatsoever! How’s that even possible?! site was something like “transact”🤷‍♂️

I was shocked that i was able to get her some more money on Dave or something, but only like $80…she did much better, getting another couple hundred somehow….

Ugh, my dick was rock hard a minute ago….point is- this bullshit still turns me on far more than anything else ever will😔

Now that i’ve leaned into it so much, and turned it into a legitimate addiction, I can’t see how i’ll ever have normal sex, ever again😔 Or hell, ANY sex really! It’d be one thing if i knew a dominant woman irl….but no domme wants to try and actually date a sub, lol, can you imagine?!

I always tell myself “all i’ve gotta do is not jerk off so much…take just a week off, and I’ll def get nice and hard!” Maybe that’s true….but first off, I can’t go 2 days without fucking my hand, usually for hours n hours n hours….Edging ofc…the few times i have tried to cum in a normal amount of time? It’s not even a legit orgasm! Even my body knows i’m a pathetic loser who doesn’t deserve pleasure.

I’m trying to step back for a moment right now, and really take this all in….I need to fully comprehend what i’ve turned my life into…..I read tweets everyday from many dommes saying “this isn’t a phase. You’re a pathetic loser; your brain is too fucked up, you’ll never recover….” and i’m starting to think it’s true😔

I know that many dommes really don’t have such evil agendas….they’re just saying what they need to say to make tons of cash…I respect that, but my god, I often wonder if they know the damage they’re doing!

Many of them definitely do…you could debate whether or not that makes them a sadist or evil, but ehhh, they’re simply doing what many of us freaks beg them to do!

Many subs get the post nut clarity and get angry, start insulting dommes etc…so they’re familiar with how shitty most men are….

Ooops i didn’t mean to make this sooo long…..oh well

[tabzjoynt]

#storytiiime cos we haven't had one of these in a hot minute 🫥

stumbled across an old post on my Snapchat from 6yrs ago, I was really going through it.

I do remember this day in particular, I was ready to step out in front of truck tbh - I was doing it rough emotionally and was heavily over being bullied by this Korean man at my job. he was horrible and most importantly the reason my anxiety came back stronger than ever. I was constantly looking over my shoulder, legit feeling like I could piss myself everytime I heard his voice.

I was also coming to terms with losing everything I invested into our exhibition - my motivation was in the toilet and I was angry for a few years after this all crumbled 🥴 I hated Onehunga - the one these people had created off the back of SWIDT's success. I recall watching the manager of the venue use the money made from my sales to shout her staff beers and lunches and cutting me out of the loop once I left to come back to Sydney. that one experience gave me the hugest trust issues when it should've been the base for something greater, her face is firmly burned into my memory - along with the smear campaign she decided to create on Twitter 🤣 it showed me the true colours of people in that circle and why I will always be allgood with being on the outside.

I had also finally ended a relationship that made me feel like I was a problem not an asset. he would belittle my appearance often, especially if I was going out to gigs or the pub with friends. once he told me that I shouldn't bother trying cos it's not like guys would find me attractive anyways - I believed him for about 5 minutes 🤣 (I got very drunk the night he said this and trashed my kitchen when I got home lolz #holesinwalls kinda trashed) even worse was when he finally left, his new gf picked him and his belongings up and disappeared into the sunset. he tried to come back a few times and each time I opened my front door to the fastest sentences that made no sense, I replied by slamming the door✌🏾 also if it wasn't for me he wouldn't own the franchise he has right now (just saying) I have all his numbers saved on my phone under #dogcunt 🤣

I am not the same - my heart still acts from a loving and respectful place but I can spot a gatekeeper from a mile away and trust my gut more than ever.

this is where my over thoughts kicked into hyperdrive and hesitation became my first reaction to everything.

although I didn't enjoy that particular growth journey in this life, it makes me excited about the possibilities - with you.

I am so much more comfortable in my own skin, I'm still awkward as fuck but it's all me.

reconnecting with you has opened me up and even tho we are severely detached from each other rn you still consume my thoughts. my faith has been tested more than once and my unorthodox energy shifts have been born out of never wanting you to feel burdened by my presence or my feelings for you. I don't think my most recent energy shift came across as a positive to you tho, I feel like you regressed and there's a very high possibility that you don't trust me at all.

Let me know if you're ready to celebrate a level up - or if you want to talk about anything or everything 🙂

I'm not lost, I just want you to find me x

[inkskinned]

Can we talk yet about how endings are actually extremely important. About how sometimes "giving the fans what they want" is actually "resolving the story in a logical and plot relevant way". That "subverting expectations" doesn't always mean you did a good thing - sometimes it means you fucked it up, royally.

There are plenty of extremely good stories that don't end happily, and yet remain retold and loved and cherished. There are plenty that have ambiguous endings or sudden turns - but manage to stick the landing through careful setup.

There is an odd tension between writers and fans that has become popular - that the writers somehow know something deeper or have a better sense of plot or are somehow more cunning. That fans are stupid and foolish and don't matter. This dichotomy would be buckwild in any other field. There's this sort of weird feeling that... The writing staff is allowed to hate and mock and deride people who have the nerve to... Like the product? Can you imagine any other brand that would survive off of "gotcha" marketing? Sure, it's funny for them... And kinda only for them. I know all the ironic assholes in the world love this shit - "haha! You liked something honestly! I know better because I'm smart so I never like things!" - but the world is really fucking boring & annoying & unfun when it is run by people who think like that.

But even taking fans OUT of the equation, as a writer, it's frustrating for me to watch other writers not value their OWN MATERIAL. Like, they don't rely on the narrative as interesting enough, as challenging enough - they think they need to end it in a "surprising" or "sudden" way in order for it to be groundbreaking. They think they need to "push boundaries" without recognizing that they are fundamentally altering and destroying the map that they have spent all this time painting.

I'm not saying I have to LIKE how something ends, or that all of my favorite characters have to live or whatever. But I AM saying that an ending is drawing a thesis line through your entire work. And recently the thesis for many, many shows/movies/etc has been - "you were a fool for caring about these characters".

Anyway art survives its creators when it tells a story that feels honest and human in the audience it is talking to - not when it is only a monument to the artist's ego. And the ending tells us - how heavy is the story we are carrying? And how much was this story a farce? And where will we let go?

[kuraitsune]

WiTH YOU, AND ALWAYS

PARiNGS - ...Ike Eveland, Shu Yamino, & Alban Knox(seperate) x GN!reader

MENTiONS - ...just you and the already mentioned boys~

SUMMARY - ...how would he react if he found out you enjoyed collecting figurines and plushies?

READER'S PROFiLE - ...you are someone who enjoys collecting figurines and plushies! as stated above <3 you're also a part of NIJISANJI EN for all hcs! established relationship with them

DiSCLAiMERS - hcs! in no way am i a professional writer, i just like english lol. please know that these writings are a work of fiction and are the appearance and persona of the character! not the person behind the screen.

IMPORTANT NOTE - hi hi! by the time i post this, it's my birthday! so i decided to write something of my oshis~ :) please enjoy~

ike would ask you about every figurine that you have!

because yk, he also collects them

but when he discovered that you also kept plushies on display, the novelist is in adoration for you

thinks it's cute that you collect them <3

you also had the nijipuppets that the corp sent you

you sometimes put your oshis in a shrine ritual-like thing(i'm watching y'all)

when you two are on an off-collab, you'd show ike each figure and plush you have with a fiery passion

he can't help but smile at your ranting on and on about your hobby

he might even bring a few of his carefully packed in his bags

the true question is, would he buy a figure or plush for you if you absolutely wanted it?

yeah, 100%

he understands the desire for them and he'd ask you "if you were able to get any figure or plush you want, what would it be?"

just for scientific reasons, yk

and then a box arrives at your door, with a note

"you may have said that you didn't want me to spend money on you, but i say this is a gift from me to you, darling"

shu thinks it's adorable that you have so many figurines and plushies just because they make you truly happy in your home!

you had teased him a bit with a shu figure that you commissioned and put the figure in a carefully decorated place in your room

he didn't know what to say(then again, he loves your loyalty and pride in the sorcerer)

he also learned that you enjoyed custom plushies and figures more than regular ones

only because you thought that if it was customized, it'd be one of a kind and be more special!

when he visited you, you had a beautiful display of the entirety of NIJISANJI EN, sorted by group! you had each member have one plush and one figure each

his eyes sparkled, amazed at your dedication to the agency!

since custom figures/plushies are much more expensive than regular ones, he thought maybe he'd give you something just from him!

it took about 2 months for it to be made but he assured you that it was going to be worth it

the package came in when you and shu had another off-collab

with his iconic v-shaped smile, he watched you fondly as you open the package, revealing an adorable figure of the two of you by a cherry blossom tree

"for you, babe. your dedication never fails to amaze me"

alban supports your love for plushies and figures!

it was surprising to him that you actually made them yourself!

what a talent, huh?

he likes watching you focus hard on making a certain plush so that it didn't look weird or out of place

thinks it's mesmerizing

sneakily asks for you to make one for himself

rolling your eyes, you really can't say no to him. so you obliged anyway

as you carefully cut out the required fabrics on stream, alban tenderly watches your every movement

even though he literally could just watch you in your sewing room

but it's okay, because he can support you through the chat <3

the phantom thief specifically watches how smooth your movements are

only to be working on something very special, just for you!

you can't even stop him from working all throughout the day(with breaks, per your begging for him to take breaks)

it's like how focused he is with playing a certain rhythm game, his bi-colored hues follow his every movement

legit just cat behavior(you wouldn't mind anyways)

when it was the day he gives you the plush

he'd be all smiles and laughs before he actually gives you it fully

"babe! you're so talented and amazing... so i made you a chibi plush of myself! hehe~"

NOTE - lol i forgot about the footer message, but here we are again! thank you for the 100+ followers since i've been writing here on tumblr~ i'll try my best to keep the flow of writing~

and it's also my bday today as stated above already! if anyone also has a bday today, happy birthday to you too! have a great week to all :D

DO NOT: repost or copy any of @kuraitsune's works! sharing is fine with credits.

[nealcassatiel]

Why was the Prequel announced sooo early? Why is Jared being super dumb? Why might his tweets cause SERIOUS issues for the future of the prequel? Why should Jensen and Dannel be livid and actually quite worried as CEOs?

I see lots of people, Jared being the main one, super confused as to why the Prequel was announced in Deadline when apparently its still just an idea? Surely its further down the road, development-wise, than Deadline and Jensen and Daneel are saying? Surely Jared has been left out of months and months of development of this show??? Well, no. Not really. This is what i think, as someone who works in TV development...

A lot of questions have occurred as to why Jared may not have known about the Ackles’ prequel, and yes it might be because they haven’t talked, but let’s look at this from an industry perspective…

Of course the project may already have NDAs attached to it, and as it seems to be in the incredibly early stages, there may not even be anything to the project right now. Working in TV development, you can have big announcements in the Trade publications (such as Deadline) with just an idea for a project with maybe one high profile talent attached. When the company’s ive worked for announce a project in it’s really early stages, without even a script and just an idea but also with IMPORTANT TALENT ATTACHED, it is for one reason: finance. The prod company and the Trade magazine work together to announce the project and it’s all planed. 

So I would guess that maybe Jensen and Daneel’s prod company are looking for extra financing? That is always why the companies ive worked for have made super early announcements like this, without even a script or an entire treatment written. If you announce a project super early but there is big talent attached, then big industry financiers may read, see the project has legs and has buzz around it already, and plonk in their money early on. 

I know it seems like if Deadline announce a project then that infers that lots has been done to develop the show already, but especially with the pandemic and the industry not doing well from a dev and prod point of view, and especially because Jensen and Daneel’s prod company hasn’t made anything yet (even if it does have a co-production deal with Warner Bros television), they still might need to get financing during the early stages of the project. Anyway, it makes sense that very little has been done on the prequel show, and they just want early buzz for financiers. So they got their PR team to talk to Deadline and Deadline and Warner Bros TV and J&D’s prod company’s PR team set up a date for the article to go out to get optimal buzz in line with when financing needs to get off the ground. 

I don’t know, but I’m sure J&D’s prod company paid a lot for the spin-off rights / general supernatural IP. So that’s a lot of sunken costs already. Also, even with The CW on board, the industry is pretty shaky right now and they still might need early financing from international distributers. 

Anyway, all I’m saying is that lots of times, when a project so early in development gets a Trade publication announcement, it’s to secure financing for the project, or to raise the awareness of a new production company, like J&A’s company. Maybe they have a whole slate of projects and are looking for co-producers, and need some legit PR to play with the other big lads in the industry (however, Chaos Machine could do with like… i mean the bare minimum of a website,, unless anyone can see their website? i cant find one?) Maybe they just want to focus on the SPN prequel. But even so, why do they need money, you ask?

If the CW is involved, and if Warner Bros television is co-producing, then why do the Ackles’s prod company need money? Surely the CW can support them and make the show?! Well… i mean, yes they could. But the Ackles wouldn’t necessarily WANT that. You see, whichever company funds the show, gets most of the creative rights to the show. The big issue with SPN was always that the CW/Warner Bros TV probably had things like ‘the final cut privalege’, and could ALWAYS have the final say on scripts. Having been through that on SPN, Jensen needs his production company to retain creative control over the IP and the rights, and for that to happen is prod co NEEDS to fund a majority of the costs. So the Ackles’ need to secure a heck of a lot of financing as a separate entity to the CW. This will mean they might get financiers, other prod cos, distribution companies, and such on board, just by an early announcement of a big project that already has legs and a buzz around it and YOU CAN HELP GET IT MADE AND GET A SLICE OF THE PROFITS ONCE IT’S MADE. See how great this project is ALREADY? Give us some money to help us retain the creative rights and get it made, then you get whatever percentage of the show’s profits. A great investment right? Look at our willing and lovely fanbase! We’re like a big family! A big, happy, fa — *enter Jared with a bulldozer*

SO. With this PR disaster from Jared’s stupid rage tweets like he’s a child, what’s the situation now? I mean, all press is good press… kind of? 

I expect the announcement has something to do with money. Either the project needs money or J&D’s production company needs money. I expect the Ackles are looking for financing, but now is their lovely PR stunt to try to get the project financially off the ground, or at least the PR stunt to try to make sure THE ACKLES retain creative rights by majorly funding the project in jeopardy? 

It depends. Certainly Jared storming in and destroying the idea of a solid and family-like fanbase is going to hamper things. Jared destroying the brotherly vibe, a central theme of the IP, is going to be an issue, but the statements J&J put out to end the drama, and Deadline’s unbelievably obvious ‘solve the drama PR’ where they wrote about the drama ‘All’s well that ends well. After some Supernatural drama that mobilized the series’ legions of fans Thursday night and Friday morning, showcasing the series’ massive social media reach, the #spnfamily is happily back together after a heart-to-heart between Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki.’ (https://deadline.com/2021/06/jared-padalecki-supernatural-prequel-reaction-bummed-gutted-the-winchesters-jensen-ackles-the-cw-1234781475/) will help. Side note, Deadline writing the announcement article with the Ackles to help them get good PR for a project, then having to write an article to solve the bad PR that was caused by their original ‘this’ll be great PR’ article is pretty hilarious. 

Basically, I don’t know if this’ll really affect the reason for the article: getting the Ackle’s money for the project. Whether it will affect the project or how much creative control the Ackles can keep if the CW does have to step in and fund it, I don’t know. But Jared obviously has no idea about how television development works, and certainly has no idea that shows so early in development have these trade publication announcements for financing (a pretty obvious and known-about thing to anyone who works at a film or tv company). Jared also seemed to think that BECAUSE it was announced in Deadline, THAT MUST MEAN that the project was more than an idea with some creatives attached, which again shows that he doesn’t understand how projects in development work and why they’re so often announced when there isn’t even a proper treatment let alone script. The dude is obviously clueless, and there is J&D trying to run a production company which pulls PR moves like this regularly, as an industry standard.

So, even if this doesn’t jeopardise the projects financing, and therefore the control the Ackle’s prod company has over the project, the personal effect this will have on Jensen could be huge. Jared, with his stupid uninformed idea that he’s been left out of loads of development of a project just because it was announced in a magazine, could be read by Jensen as really putting his baby of a project in danger. The article was about money, and what if Jared’s tweets mean that they won’t be able to fund it? What if the CW does have to majority fund it and therefore keep creative control like they did with SPN? Like, this is Jensen and his wife’s COMPANY. Which they’ve already sunken costs into? Like… this is their FINANCIAL FUTURE Jared has stuck his foot into? That article WAS ABOUT MONEY FOR THEIR COMPANY. OF COURSE IT WAS. And now Jared has put their company, and financial future into question potentially? DUMB IDIOT. 

Anyway, that’s how announcements like this work, this is why they normally happen when a project is so early in its development it seems silly to even ‘announce’ anything. Someone forward this to Jared plz and thanks. xxx

[destinygoldenstar]

In defense of Noah.

So I got noted quite a bit in my Owen post (which blew up A LOT more than I initiated. Wow.) that I did not mention that Noah was... not the nicest person in the world to Owen in RR, and yet I claimed they were friends. 

I wanted to say my thoughts on that.

Will this be bias because I love Noah? Yeah. Probably.

I’m not gonna act like Noah was traditionally nice to Owen. Not ever, actually. He did laugh at Owen’s milk snot in World Tour, and a couple times I’m too lazy to recall right now, but not much else that can be deemed as ‘friendly.’

Really, has Noah EVER been traditionally a friendly person? To ANYONE?

He deals with his interactions with a smirk and a rude demeanor. With the exception of Emma, who I will get to later, he talks in the sarcastic tone we love about him. 

I understand where that criticism comes from. Despite becoming good friends with Owen and staying with him on multiple reality shows, he doesn’t really show that much kindness towards him. Heck, he doesn’t really show that to anyone and constantly forces people to do the hard work for him. Dodgebrawl? The Tyler stretching incident? That’s not OOC. 

But... I honestly liked it. And here’s why.

It was just really wholesome to see this stone faced lazy guy get slapped in the face with sincerity and make a much healthier life for himself. Better than working for Chris anyway.

Noah’s someone very introverted and, lets face it, spoiled. The game might actually be the first time he was rejected ever. After Island, he became Chris’s little assistant, and that says all, and in World Tour, he actually does try to dodge hard challenges first (remember the pinball challenge?) And who forces him into a position to always be on guard? Owen. Mostly because Owen is probably gonna (accidentally) kill Noah. And Alejandro, who is sus.

I See London is the first episode where Noah legit takes charge in something. He’s not nice about it, I don’t expect him to be, but they had to win the challenge. It’s not the rules were gonna change on them at the last minute- oh wait.

(I mean, it’s Total Drama. Hosted by Chris McLean. So... I’m not as mad about that as you think I would be.)

But let me ask this: If Noah had no care for Owen whatsoever, WHY would he even stay with Owen for so many reality shows? 

I’ll wait.

Of course Noah isn’t gonna outright say he cares about him, or even be good at encouraging his partner. “You’re about as picky as a raccoon”, is essentially his poor way of encouraging that he can do it. Unlike Emma, who only saw Kitty as an asset to winning the money at first, Noah knows who Owen is, and tries to help them both. Could he be nicer about it? Yes. But that’s not the point. The point is ‘how would this be an in character way for them to deal the situation?’

“Hold on, but he developed all these feelings for Emma and constantly tried to impress her” -The reblog section

Here’s the big case.

That whole thing is only proof that Owen’s good nature DOES rub off on Noah. Better yet, being forced into situations where he has to actually TRY to make it and survive. 

And a crush? Yeah, that’ll let that all out at once. It’s basically, Noah recognizes that he legit WANTS something that’s hard to get. Of course he’s bad at dealing with emotion and struggling with something that seems so... sappy. This is a whole new experience for him. 

And as much as you may want to deny it, Noah is NOT just an emotionless sarcastic machine. If that were the case, he wouldn’t laugh at Owen’s milk shake at all, which that too, could’ve easily come across as unconventional for him. 

(I don’t want to talk about the ‘But there were hints that Noah was gay, and yet he becomes straight’ stuff. I don’t hate it, and that’s coming from someone graysexual. Total Drama is bad at representation. The fandom just wants to ignore the facts because they love the show and the characters anyway. If I wrote Total Drama, would I have made Noah gay? Coin toss. But what’s canon is canon, write a fanfic instead of whining to the writers. Over.)

For me at least, I just found it really wholesome to see this brainiac become way more understanding and better at relationships as the show went on. 

With Emma, it’s understanding her boundaries in order to properly be with her. 

With Owen, he does actually get better at showing his care for Owen as RR goes on. It’s Owen who helps him in the air guitar challenge, and from there, the bossiness towards the big guy becomes way less frequent. 

Total Drama doesn’t have it’s characters blatantly say, “I’m sorry I treated you badly” or “I’ll try to be better” or “I care about you and I want you around”. Some shows do that, in my writing I do that, but that’s never been this show’s style. So of course Noah isn’t gonna blatantly apologize or say “I need you.”

Would I have liked for Noah to have said this sort of stuff out loud? Yeah.

Would I have liked for Noah to have more screen time to flesh out what I’m talking about? YES.

But for what we have, I still love Noah as a character. He’s not the best written character in the show, but sometimes you don’t care.

Who knows? Maybe I’ll make a Noah centric fic that takes place in an alternate timeline of the show. where he DOES get the screen time to flesh out what I’m trying to say. No promises though. 

[multi-fandomfuckboy]

Tales From a Smuggler

Part 1: The Offer

Din x Smuggler!Reader

(Slow burn, multiple parts)

Summary: You are picking up a shipment of illegal merchandise and run into some trouble while trying to refuel. When a mandalorian shows up to help, he makes you an offer you can't refuse. Little did you know the trouble it would bring.

Warnings: none

Word Count: 1,897

AN: No one asked for this but I wrote it anyway! I hope you guys like it! It is going to have multiple parts so if you want to be added to the taglist let me know!

You hated pick-ups on this planet. There was so much sand and it always managed to get everywhere. You would be cleaning it out of your landing gear for weeks. But, like always, the money was good enough to keep you coming back.

You sat by the loading dock, watching as a masked crew hauled box after box into the cargo hold. This was an average job, a legit shipment with a couple of “added” boxes that came with a credit bonus. The money was worth it, as long as you didn’t get caught. The way you saw it, being a smuggler was just providing a service. You didn’t even know what was in the boxes half the time, just picking them up and dropping them off.

You looked at your data pad, it had the official embargo of your ship. What you were hauling for who and where. It was what you would show any officials that you ran into on your journey. It was normally too much of a hassle to open all the boxes and confirm their contents with the manifest, lucky for you.

Looking up, you saw the dock manager approaching. He was a large man, covered in drab brown robes, similar to yours. You recognized him from your previous pick-ups here. Meeting his gaze, you didn’t bother removing the mask that covered most of your face, only nodding in acknowledgment.

“We are almost finished loading.” he said standing beside you, watching as the last few crates were onboarded. You stood turning to face him as he did the same. He leaned in closely, taking your hand, in what would look like a handshake to anyone watching. “Same deal as last time. You get the rest on delivery.” he said quietly, letting the bag of credits slip into your palm.

“It might take longer than normal.” you say, slipping the bag into your pocket along with your data pad. “I hear there have been an increase in searches these days, gotta be extra careful.” you add. He nods in understanding, taking a step back.

“Do what you need to. And remember, if you do get caught… you don't know me. “ he says with a chuckle, but you can see in his eyes that he is deadly serious. Despite the heat of the desert, a chill runs up your spine.

Turning, you board the ship, closing the hatch behind you. Looking around, you quickly counted your cargo making sure they had loaded everything. Unfortunately, getting caught wasn't the worst thing that could happen in your line of work. If you showed up to a delivery and something was missing, it was as good as a death sentence. Satisfied that everything was in order, you made your way to the cockpit.

Your ship was nothing fancy, an average shipping freighter to the untrained eye. The only thing that set it apart were the expansive smuggling compartments hidden across the hold. They came in handy when you needed to hide something in a hurry.

Strapping yourself in, you looked over your control panel. Everything looked good, except for one thing. Your fuel. You groaned, leaning your head back against your chair. Another drawback about picking up at this station was that they didn’t offer fuel services. The closest one was across the planet, in a service port not known for their hospitality. It was not the type of place you wanted to be caught with a valuable shipment. There was a reason your employer kept his warehouse as far away from it as possible. If anyone caught wind of what you were hauling, you would be robbed before your tanks were half full.

Seeing that you had no other choice, you gritted your teeth and fired up your engines.

“Alright then, let’s get this over with.” you mumbled to yourself, starting for the port.

---------

Approaching the station, you triple checked to make sure all of your hatches were secure. Preparing for landing, you reached under your control panel to retrieve the blaster that you stored there. Normally, you were more of a runner than a fighter, but in a place like this, it helped to look as dangerous as possible. Securing the weapon in your thigh holster, you made your final descent into the fueling station.

Upon landing, a small group of droids rushed forward connecting the fuel hoses. Night had fallen over the desert but you pulled your mask over your face anyway, always favoring anonymity in situations like this. Exiting your ship, you headed for the port masters desk. He watched you as you approached, sizing you up with a bored expression.

“How much to fill the tanks?” you asked, watching as he narrowed his eyes at you, obviously not expecting a feminine voice from under the mass of brown robes.

“5,000” he said flatly, watching you take out a bag of credits and place it on the desk. “It might take a while.” he added, reaching forward to collect them. “It’s a pretty big ship, takes a while to fill the tanks.” In any other circumstance, you would have rolled your eyes. It was your ship. Of course you knew how long it would take to fuel. Not wanting to cause problems, you remained silent, simply nodding instead.

You made your way to the cantina next to the station so you could keep an eye on your ship. It was crowded, filled with an assortment of strange and sometimes dangerous patrons. You chose a seat close to the exit, hoping that if anything happened you could easily slip out. You ordered a drink, but it remained untouched in front of you. You knew that this port was filled with the worst kind of criminals, not the kind of place to be off your guard.

Unfortunately, your arrival had not gone unnoticed. A large crolute eyed you from across the room, a small group of scavengers gathered around him. When you had seen him, it set your hair on end. Every instinct in you screamed for you to leave, but where could you go? The cantina was crowded and you hoped that would deter the gang from any type of action, the streets were deserted at night you would be easy prey.

You watched out of the corner of your eye as the crolute made his way towards you, your hand instinctively moving to the blaster concealed in your robes. Finally he came to stand in front of you.

“Hey! You came in on that freighter.” it was a statement. You struggled to remain still as he stood over you, his group trailing behind him. “What are you hauling?”  he asked, leering down at you. Swallowing past the lump in your throat you tried to force your voice to be steady.

“Droid parts.” you said simply. He eyed you unconvinced. Your hand tightened around the hilt of your weapon as he leaned in closer. A twisted smile split his face, filling you with the urge to run.

“I think you're lying.” he said quietly so no one else in the cantina could hear over the noise, you could feel his hot breath against your face. “And I think that whatever you have on that ship is mine now.” Your heart pounded in your ears as you saw him reach towards you. You moved to pull your blaster but before you could even get it out of the holster there was a flash of silver and the large crolute was thrown to the ground.

In his place now stood a large figure, clad in shining armour, a blaster pointed at the gang of scavengers hurrying to help their leader up.

“A mandalorian?!” the crolute gasped in fear. The cantina suddenly fell silent. All eyes were on the heavily armoured man as he took a threatening step forward, gesturing to the gang with his blaster.

“I suggest you leave.” The mandalorians' modulated voice said calmly. The gang scrambled over one another in their hurry to get out of the way, apparently valuing their lives more than whatever you were hauling.

Thinking that you had somehow gained the attention of someone more dangerous than the gang of scavengers, you quietly slipped out of your seat and out the door, while the mando was focused on the crowd of onlookers.

Once outside, you hastily made your way to your ship, cursing at yourself.

“You idiot! Why didn't you just stay at the station?? Cause then they could have come looking for you there!” you argued with yourself. You could hear the mandalorian chasing after you, prompting you to quicken your pace.

“Wait! I just want to talk!” He called catching up with you and grabbing your arm. Spinning quickly, you jabbed the barrel of your blaster into the space between his armour under his arm.

“You had better let go of me mandalorian, because I may not be a marksman but at this range, it would be hard to miss.” You hiss threateningly narrowing your eyes on his visor, pressing your weapon hard against his ribs. He paused, his grip still firm on your arm.

“I need your help.” he said, his grip loosening. His words shocked you.

“What?” you asked furrowing your brows.

“I need your help getting off the planet.” he began. “Those scavengers thought you were a smuggler and based on your response, I would say they were right.” he explained. You bristled slightly at the fact you had been spotted as a smuggler so quickly. Sighing, you lowered your weapon and he released your arm.

“I can't help you.” you said holstering your blaster again. “I have places to be.” you say turning to leave.

”I can pay you.” He adds quickly, causing you to pause, a small smirk pulling at your lips.

“I don't think you could afford-”

“60,000 credits.” the smirk fell from your face. That, along with the payment for the shipment, a payday like that had you feeling dizzy just thinking about it. “60,000 to get me and one other off this planet.” he says, but his words fall on deaf ears as you run through the pros and cons of taking this offer. There is a long pause before you respond.

Turning back to him, you look him over. He was a large man, definitely dangerous. If something were to happen and he decided to kill you there would be little you could do to stop him. But then your memories returned to what he had done for you in the cantina. You owed him in a way. And if the money was good…

“You’ve got a deal.” you say taking a step towards him extending your hand. He reached forward, taking your hand in his. You gripped it tightly, despite it being larger than yours, before adding “but it’s my ship mandalorian, and you follow my rules or I will dump you body in space without hesitation.” you say firmly. You were met only with a nod of his helmet.

“Good.” you said, releasing his hand. “I’ll be leaving in 30, either you be there or you get left behind.” you say before turning for your ship. You didn’t normally smuggle people but with the money he was offering it was hard to refuse.

“What is the worst that could happen?” you mumbled to yourself.

Part 2, Part 3

REQUESTS ARE OPEN!!

AN: This is my first Mandalorian Fic, so please let me know what you guys think. I have an idea of where I want the story to go and trust me there will be a lot of pinning and longing in the upcoming parts.