#anyway moral of the story if a character makes you happy they make you happy and its no one elses business | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

solxamber · 3 months ago

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Trash Novel Chronicles: Get Me Out of Here || Rook Hunt

You’re isekai’d into a trashy novel and stuck as a tragic side knight character. All you want is survival, but your boss is Rook Hunt—a poetic, eccentric duke.

Now you’re caught in his chaos and, worse, you kinda don’t mind.

Series Masterlist

You’re a completely normal person. You eat normal meals at normal times, sleep the normal amount of hours (give or take a few, who needs all eight anyway?), and hold down a regular, soul-crushingly normal job. It’s not glamorous, but it pays the bills and lets you indulge in your one true love: reading web novels for five hours straight like some kind of feral literature goblin.

Your current obsession? The Lady’s Tragic Love. It’s the sort of story that you can’t put down—not because it’s good, but because it’s so excruciatingly terrible that it loops back around into comedy. The heroine has all the personality of a wet tissue but somehow manages to ruin everyone’s lives with reckless abandon. It’s almost impressive.

You rub your temples as you skim yet another chapter. “Oh my God, this woman has the moral compass of a black hole,” you mutter.

The plot makes less sense the deeper you go: the heroine starts off as the daughter of a down-on-their-luck noble family. Her father racks up an unholy amount of debt, so she’s forced to marry a viscount who—get this—is actually a nice guy. Like, genuinely kind. He agrees to marry her in name only to protect her from debt collectors, even offering to fund her hobbies.

And what does she do? Poison him. Poison him!

"Okay, maybe she's misunderstood," you think, in the kind of delusional optimism only a web novel enthusiast can muster.

Nope. She poisons him because she "can’t stand looking at his face," which is only mildly unattractive and not the ogre-like monstrosity the text implies. Also, he was literally helping her stay alive.

“Oh, sure, let’s kill the only decent male character in this hellscape. Why not?” you hiss, scrolling furiously.

After committing literal murder, the heroine sets her sights on an archduke, who is tall, handsome, and very much engaged to the so-called villainess. The villainess is stunning, kind, intelligent, and inexplicably hated by everyone because—checks notes—she’s too perfect?

At this point, you're gripping your phone so hard that it’s a miracle it doesn’t snap in half. “Why is the villainess the villain? This should be the heroine’s title! She’s practically speedrunning how to be the worst human being alive!”

But no, the heroine gets rewarded for her nonsense. The archduke doesn’t fall for her (because he has taste), but the crown prince does. The prince, apparently a sucker for chaos, marries her. Instead of being happy with her new title and riches, the heroine spends her days scheming to ruin the villainess’s life because, in her words, “How dare the archduke choose someone that isn’t me?”

You pause and reread that line. Then reread it again.

“WHAT?!” you yell so loudly that your downstairs neighbor bangs on the ceiling.

It’s a spiral of nonsense that drags you through emotional whiplash until you finish the last chapter with a migraine and a full-blown existential crisis. You stare at the screen. "Why...why did I do this to myself?"

You stumble out to your tiny balcony to clear your head, phone still in hand. The cool night air washes over you as you lean on the railing, your brain buzzing with rage and confusion.

“Why does she get a happy ending?” you grumble. “She’s a walking red flag factory! The villainess deserves to be queen, and the prince deserves a lobotomy for his taste in women!”

In your frustration, you kick the balcony railing. Unfortunately, your landlord hasn’t exactly been diligent about repairs. The rusted screws holding it in place give way with a terrifying screech.

“Oh, come on,” you say, deadpan, as the railing collapses beneath you.

You plummet ten stories down, bouncing off an awning like some kind of cartoon character before landing face-first in a suspiciously placed fruit cart.

As darkness creeps in, your final thought is not of regret, nor fear, but of pure, unfiltered pettiness:

“I hope my next life is more exciting… and I never have to read about this heroine again.”

With that, you pass out, blissfully unaware of the absurd fate that awaits you.

You wake up, groggy and disoriented, and immediately ask yourself the first logical question: Why the hell am I alive?

The last thing you remember is gravity betraying you and a suspiciously convenient fruit cart breaking your fall. But when you sit up and look around, it’s very clear you’re not in your crappy apartment anymore. For starters, this place is way too clean, smells faintly of vanilla, and—oh, is that sunlight streaming through those beautiful glass windows? Not the dim, depressing flicker of the streetlight outside your old place?

Something is very wrong.

You scramble out of the bed, which is definitely not your rickety twin-sized monstrosity held together with duct tape and misplaced hope, and start poking around. The furniture is elegant, the carpet is plush, and there’s an oil painting on the wall that practically screams, Welcome to Generic Medieval Europe™!

The realization slams into you with all the subtlety of a freight train: You’re in that garbage web novel.

You pause, frozen, your brain throwing up a million red flags at once. Your knees almost buckle. "Nope. No. Absolutely not. This is some kind of cosmic punishment," you whisper to yourself, clutching your temples.

You creep towards the ornate mirror on the other side of the room, your reflection getting clearer with every step. “Please,” you mutter, “if there’s a single merciful entity out there, don’t let me be the heroine. Or the villainess. Or, God forbid, one of the male leads.”

You finally reach the mirror, squeeze your eyes shut, then crack one open. And there you are: just some random face.

“Oh, thank God,” you exhale, slumping against the wall. You’re not the heroine. You’re not the villainess. You’re not one of the tragic walking disasters that make up the main cast. You're just… some person. A total nobody.

But just as you’re about to bust out your victory dance of mediocrity, something catches your eye. You lean closer, squinting.

Wait.

No.

NO.

You’re that nobody.

You’re the tragic commoner knight who gets blackmailed by the heroine, coerced into doing her dirty work, and ends up assassinating the villainess for her. The same commoner knight who dies in three chapters because the heroine throws them under the bus as soon as the villainess's fiancé finds out what happened.

You stagger back from the mirror like it’s cursed. “Nope. Nope. Absolutely not. I did not reincarnate into this medieval soap opera just to get unalived in the dumbest way possible,” you say, pacing the room like a lunatic.

Your character’s life flashes before your eyes: the abusive father, the crippling family loyalty, the gambling debts. This poor soul had it rough even before getting turned into the heroine’s personal murder minion. And you? You’re not about to pick up that torch.

So you grab some parchment and pen what might be the most passive-aggressive resignation letter of all time.

“To Her Highness, the Crown Princess,

Kindly do your own dirty work from now on. My father can gamble himself into oblivion. I’m out. Good luck with your reign or whatever.”

Satisfied, you sign it with an unnecessarily large flourish, slap it on the desk, and prepare to bounce.

You’re halfway down the hall when you almost walk face-first into him.

Rook Hunt, the walking embodiment of “this guy doesn’t belong in this novel but here he is anyway,” stands there with his golden hair and overly dramatic smile. He’s loud. He’s eccentric. He’s dressed like he’s about to break into a musical number about the beauty of life. Oh, and he’s also the duke whose household you served in as a knight before you quit.

“Mon ami!” he exclaims, throwing his arms wide like you’re long-lost lovers. “You’ve returned to me! What an exquisite twist of fate! Shall we celebrate the beauty of reunion?”

“No,” you say flatly. You attempt to sidestep him, but Rook doesn’t just let things go.

“You cannot leave me again! Do you not wish to resume your role as my loyal knight?”

“Absolutely not,” you snap on instinct, because why on earth would you willingly dive back into this mess? But then it hits you. Wait.

Rook isn’t part of the main plot. He’s not the crown prince, not the archduke, not the villain, and definitely not one of the doomed love interests. He’s just… there. A minor character. A colorful extra who pops up to sprinkle poetic nonsense into the plot and then wanders offstage.

Your brain kicks into overdrive. If you stick with him, you’ll be close enough to the action to keep tabs but far enough to avoid the heroine’s nonsense. Plus, salary. And minor characters like him rarely die!

Your decision solidifies. You plaster on a winning smile and nod. “Actually, on second thought, yeah. Let’s do that.”

“Magnifique!” Rook practically beams as he grabs your arm. “Come, let us bask in the splendor of returning home!”

You follow him, letting his endless stream of poetic babble wash over you. Is this the best plan? Probably not. But it beats getting murdered for a heroine who couldn’t find her moral compass with both hands and a map.

You make it back to the duke’s grand estate—because of course it’s grand. Every aristocrat in this godforsaken novel seems to have a mansion the size of a small country. Rook practically floats through the gates, his dramatic energy causing every passing servant to give him the “not again” look. You follow, still trying to process the reality of your current situation.

After an unnecessarily flowery tour of the place (you’ve been here before in this body, but you let him talk because it’s easier than interrupting), he finally stops in the courtyard. He turns to you, his eyes gleaming with excitement.

“Now, mon chevalier, reclaim your rightful position as my trusted bodyguard!” he declares, flinging his arms wide as if inviting the heavens to applaud him.

You blink. “…Respectfully, sir, why do you need a bodyguard?”

He pauses, staring at you like you just asked why water is wet. Then, with an infuriatingly serene smile, he says, “Ah, but the shadows are filled with secrets, my dear knight! The beauty of life is in its mysteries, n’est-ce pas?”

You squint at him. “Okay, but that doesn’t answer the question.”

He leans in closer, dropping his voice to a conspiratorial whisper. “Because the wolves, mon ami. The wolves.”

You freeze. “…What wolves?”

Rook straightens up, tilting his head as if contemplating the meaning of the universe. “Ah, they are everywhere and nowhere. In the forests, in the halls, in the hearts of men. Who can say where danger truly lies?”

This man just said a whole lot of words without saying anything.

“Right,” you say slowly, pinching the bridge of your nose. “But you’re, like, ridiculously strong. I’m pretty sure you could take on any wolf—metaphorical or not—by yourself.”

“Ah, mon chevalier,” he says with a wistful sigh, placing a hand on his chest like he’s reciting a Shakespearean soliloquy. “Strength alone cannot protect one from the unexpected, the unseen, the poetry of peril!”

You stare at him, trying to figure out if this is some sort of elaborate prank. But no. This man is completely serious.

“So… wolves. Poetry of peril. Got it,” you mutter, rubbing your temples. “I’ll, uh, just… go patrol or something, I guess.”

Rook claps his hands together, beaming. “Ah, magnifique! I knew you would understand! Truly, you are a gem among knights!”

You slink off, still scratching your head. You’re 90% sure the wolves are a metaphor for absolutely nothing, but who are you to question the logic of a trash novel? At least the pay is good.

You quickly realize this trash novel is trying to trash you right back. It’s like every corner you turn, fate has decided you don’t deserve a peaceful life.

Walking through the garden to calm your nerves? Someone leaps out of the hedges with a dagger. You narrowly dodge, trip over a decorative fountain, and the attacker runs off, cackling.

Trying to enjoy the roses because you’re starting to think, “Hey, if I gotta die, at least let it be aesthetic?” Nope, arrow. Right past your ear.

By the fifth assassination attempt (some guy “accidentally” dropping a potted plant from a balcony), it clicks. The heroine must’ve decided since you’re not doing her dirty work anymore, she needs to eliminate you before you spill the beans. But, unlike her, you have brains.

So, you write a letter.

Dear Villainess and Esteemed Archduke,

I hope this letter finds you well, though considering the general chaos surrounding us, that feels optimistic.

I am writing to inform you of an unfortunate situation involving a certain someone (cough the crown princess cough) who has, shall we say, less-than-noble intentions toward your continued existence.

To clarify: she asked me to assassinate you. I know, shocking. However, as someone who values integrity, personal safety, and not being murdered by shady royalty, I’ve decided to step down from my position as her unwilling assassin.

This does mean she may hire someone else to handle the job, which is unfortunate for you but also none of my business anymore. I’m not sure how you typically handle murder plots, but I suggest taking precautions, like perhaps not smelling your roses or standing under precariously placed flower pots.

Lastly, while I am admittedly a pawn in this chaotic mess, I felt it was only fair to let you know what’s going on. I wish you both a long, unassassinated life.

Warm regards,

Your Local Retired Assassin

P.S. Please don’t kill me. I’m just the messenger.

You thought this letter would buy you peace. Instead, it bought you an invitation.

And by “invitation,” you mean you’ve been dragged into a private meeting with the villainess and the archduke, who are both sitting across from you now, looking like they’re deciding whether to thank you or strangle you.

“So,” the villainess says, her voice like ice. “You’re telling me the crown princess is plotting to kill me?”

“Uh, yes,” you say, your palms sweating. “But, like, not me anymore! I’ve retired. Permanently.”

The archduke raises an eyebrow. “Why would she want to kill us?”

You glance at the villainess. “Uh… because you exist?”

Before the villainess can stab you (she looks ready), the door swings open, and in saunters Rook.

“Ah, my friends!” he says, grinning ear to ear. “How serendipitous that we are all here. I believe I can shed some light on this matter.”

You gape as Rook launches into a detailed explanation of the heroine’s convoluted scheme—exactly what she’s planning, who she’s hiring, and even the color of the dress she’ll wear while gloating about it.

The villainess and the archduke exchange a glance, then rise, thanking Rook for his “invaluable insight” before sweeping out of the room, leaving you and Rook alone.

You turn to him, your jaw still on the floor. “How do you even know all that?”

Rook just winks at you. “Ah, mon chevalier, the shadows have ears, and I am their maestro.”

He struts out, humming a jaunty tune, leaving you sitting there, more confused than ever. At this point, you’re half-convinced Rook is either a genius or just making stuff up as he goes. And honestly? You’re too tired to figure it out.

You’re stationed at the edge of the garden, trying your best to blend into the scenery while the tea party unfolds. Rook, as usual, is the life of the gathering, passionately chatting with Vil and Epel, who looks like he’d rather be anywhere else.

You’re in your usual "bodyguard mode," which mostly consists of staring off into the distance and trying not to fall asleep. It’s peaceful—for once—until Epel casually drops a comment loud enough for even you to hear.

"Rook, you finally got them back, huh?"

Your brain screeches to a halt.

Got you back? Back? What does that mean? What is there to get back? Was there something to get back in the first place?

You barely have time to process any of this before Rook, in the most Rook way possible, interrupts with a flurry of poetic nonsense.

“Ah, young Epel, the winds of fortune have indeed graced me with their bounteous song! But let us not dwell on the past, for the present blooms before us like a radiant garden of opportunity!”

You blink. Did… did that mean anything? Epel seems to think it doesn’t, judging by the way he rolls his eyes and mutters something under his breath. But you’re too busy processing the odd look on Rook’s face to care.

Because, for the first time ever, Rook looks nervous.

His usual serene confidence is still there, but there’s a hint of something else—a faint pink dusting his cheeks, an almost imperceptible shift in his tone. And why the hell is your heart fluttering at the sight?

You squint at him, trying to decode whatever is happening here. Is he… embarrassed? Flustered? Can Rook even be flustered?

Before you can spiral further into overthinking, you notice Vil’s sharp gaze cutting through the moment like a knife. His violet eyes lock onto yours, and an infuriatingly amused smile tugs at the corner of his lips.

Oh no. He knows.

Vil, of course, pretends like nothing’s happening, smoothly pouring himself another cup of tea and joining the conversation like the consummate aristocrat he is. But every so often, you catch him glancing at you with that same entertained expression, like he’s just discovered a juicy secret.

You try to shake it off, refusing to let yourself be dragged into this nonsense. But Rook’s flushed face lingers in your mind, and every time he smiles at you for the rest of the party, you feel the heat creeping up your own cheeks.

Great. Just great. Whatever this is, it’s going to haunt you for days.

It started with an uproar in the palace—a desperate, urgent call for help sent to Rook, Duke of Hunt.

"The wolves are attacking!"

You were mid-sword practice when the messenger arrived, breathless and frantic. He handed the summons to Rook, who took the parchment with an amused smile.

"Wolves, you say?" he mused, tapping his chin dramatically.

"Yes, my lord!" The messenger practically collapsed from the effort of delivering the message. "They’ve breached the outer gardens, and the prince and heroine request your immediate assistance!"

Rook looked at you, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "Ah, mon chevalier, do you recall what I told you once about wolves?"

You blinked, frowning. "You mean the thing about being surrounded by wolves one day? I thought you were joking."

Rook’s grin widened. "Oh, I never jest about wolves."

You opened your mouth to demand clarification, but Rook waved the parchment dismissively. "Alas, I must decline."

The messenger froze. "W-What? But…you’re the Duke of Hunt! The greatest tracker and marksman in the kingdom! Without you, the palace is doomed!"

Rook leaned forward conspiratorially. "Tell me, mon ami, what makes you think I’d risk life and limb for the likes of the heroine and her precious prince?"

The messenger stammered. "B-But—"

Rook held up a hand, silencing him. "No, no. I simply cannot. My schedule is far too packed. Why, just this morning, I promised my chevalier here that I’d help reorganize their weapons rack." He turned to you with a wink. "Isn’t that right?"

You rolled your eyes but nodded. "Yep. Super busy."

The messenger left, looking utterly defeated. You figured that was the end of it.

It wasn’t.

Over the next two hours, messengers kept arriving, each more desperate than the last. Rook refused them all with increasing flamboyance.

One messenger was sent away with, "Alas, the stars are not in alignment for such a hunt!"

Another was dismissed with, "The winds whisper that this is not my destiny today."

Finally, a personal plea came from the heroine herself. She barged into the estate, dramatically throwing herself at Rook’s feet.

"Oh, noble Duke!" she wailed. "You are the only one who can save us! Please, I beg of you!"

Rook tilted his head, pretending to think it over. Then he glanced at you, his expression suddenly sharp beneath the veneer of cheer.

"And what of my chevalier?" he asked.

The heroine frowned. "What do you mean?"

"You’ve made quite a nuisance of yourself lately," Rook said lightly, though there was an edge to his voice. "Why, only yesterday, you sent someone to ambush them in the gardens, did you not?"

Her face paled.

"I might reconsider," Rook said, his tone taking on a singsong quality, "if you promise to leave them alone from now on."

There was a long, tense pause. The heroine’s expression flickered between rage and fear before she finally forced a smile. "Very well. I promise."

"Splendid!" Rook clapped his hands and stood. "To the hunt, then!"

You stood there in stunned silence as he walked out the door, bow in hand. When he turned back to flash you a grin, you couldn’t help but mutter, "What the hell just happened?"

Rook’s laugh echoed through the halls, and you were left wondering yet again if you’d ever fully understand this ridiculous man.

It’s payday, baby.

You’ve never been more excited to hold a pouch of jingling coins in your life. Your day off couldn’t have come at a better time, and you’ve already decided to treat yourself. No assassination attempts, no cryptic poetry, no Rook yammering about beauty—just you, the market, and sweet, sweet retail therapy.

After wandering for a while, you stumble upon a fruit stall, and your eyes light up. The produce is incredible—vividly colored, juicy, and nothing like the waxy, suspiciously glossy stuff you’d get in your original world. You don’t even know what half these fruits are, but they smell amazing, and you’re buying them all.

As you carry your haul back to the manor, an idea hits you like a freight train. You’ve been craving dessert—specifically, something you can’t get in medieval Europe. Something simple, sweet, and utterly anachronistic.

And that’s how you end up in the kitchen, surrounded by fresh fruit, flour, sugar, and whatever else you’ve managed to scrounge up. You’re determined to make crêpes. Yes, you know they weren’t invented yet, but the cooks don’t even seem to know what a waffle is, so they’re not going to stop you.

It takes a bit of trial and error—because, shocker, medieval kitchens are not equipped for finesse—but eventually, you’ve got a plate of soft, golden crêpes filled with fresh fruit and drizzled with honey. It’s so beautiful it almost brings a tear to your eye.

You’re mid-bite, mentally congratulating yourself, when Rook materializes out of nowhere like some kind of dessert-seeking missile.

“Mon chevalier! What marvel have you crafted here in this humble kitchen? The scent alone rivals the sweetest perfume!”

You freeze. This is fine. He’s just curious. There’s no reason to panic. Subconsciously, you scoop up a bite on your fork and offer it to him, your body on autopilot.

Rook doesn’t hesitate, leaning in and accepting the bite with the elegance of a prince at court. “Magnifique! Truly, you have woven magic into this creation, mon cher!”

You relax slightly, pride swelling at the compliment—until he takes your hand and licks a stray drop of honey from your finger.

Your brain short-circuits.

Before you can even form a coherent thought, Rook grins at you with that infuriatingly charming smile of his, leaning in to press a quick kiss to your cheek.

“You are as talented in the kitchen as you are with a blade,” he says, his voice warm and soft, as if he hasn’t just dismantled your sanity.

And then he’s gone, striding out of the kitchen with his usual jaunty step, leaving you standing there like an idiot, replaying the sensation of his lips on your cheek and his tongue on your finger.

You slowly sink to the floor, crêpe in hand, trying to process what just happened.

“Why,” you mutter to yourself, taking another bite of your crêpe for courage, “does this keep happening to me?”

Life had been…dare you say it, pleasant recently. No assassination attempts, no tea parties and no surprise arrows whizzing by your head. You were almost convinced this world might not be so bad after all.

But like clockwork, the plot reared its ugly head.

You were outside, basking in the rare serenity of a quiet afternoon, when the shouting began. You knew the voice instantly. It was grating, furious, and way too familiar.

Your abusive father—the original you’s deadbeat excuse for a parent—had somehow crawled out of the woodwork.

“You useless brat!” he snarled, stomping toward you. “How dare you stop sending money? Do you think you’re too good for your family now?!”

Oh, for the love of—

You crossed your arms, already done with the theatrics. “First of all, family implies mutual care and respect, neither of which you’ve ever provided. Secondly, kiss my ass.”

The man’s face turned a deep shade of purple, veins bulging in his forehead. He raised his hand, and you didn’t flinch. You weren’t scared of him. You were just irritated that he had the audacity to show up and ruin your vibe.

But before his hand could even swing down, an arrow whizzed past, slicing through the air with deadly precision. It nicked his cheek, leaving a shallow cut, and he yelped like a scolded dog.

You turned, and there he was.

Rook.

But this wasn’t the poetic, flowery Rook who praised sunsets and waxed lyrical about everything under the sun. No, this was Duke Hunt. His bow was clenched tightly in one hand, his expression colder than you’d ever seen. His eyes locked onto your father, sharp and unyielding, and for the first time, you truly understood why people called him a hunter.

Your father stumbled back, clutching his cheek. “Y-you’ll regret this! I’ll get my revenge!” he spat, turning tail and running like the two-bit villain he was.

You didn’t even watch him go. You were too busy staring at Rook, your heart pounding in a way that had nothing to do with fear and everything to do with the fact that, dammit, he looked good like this.

You silently scolded yourself. Really? Now? This is when you’re going to have a revelation about your feelings? Pull it together.

Rook’s gaze softened as he looked at you, and without a word, he closed the distance between you. Before you could process it, his arms wrapped around you, pulling you into a firm, steady embrace.

You stiffened for a moment, but then it hit you—you were shaken. You hadn’t realized it until now, but the encounter had left your hands trembling. And Rook…he didn’t say a word. He just held you, radiating warmth and reassurance, as if he knew exactly what you needed.

Slowly, you relaxed, leaning into him, letting the tension bleed out of your body. For once, there were no witty remarks, no poetic musings, no cryptic riddles. Just Rook, steady and solid, and the quiet comfort of his presence.

You closed your eyes, letting out a shaky breath. Maybe life here wasn’t so bad after all.

It was the hunting competition trope—the bread and butter of every third-rate villainess novel ever written. Noblemen rode out in droves to massacre innocent wildlife in the name of prestige, while the women gathered on the sidelines to swoon over who could kill the most majestic creature.

Normally, you'd find this whole affair ridiculous, but today? Today, it was a strategic opportunity.

Rook and you had cooked up a plan. After bagging his game, Rook would publicly gift it to the villainess, cementing the stance of his household against the heroine. A subtle yet unmistakable message to everyone present: this duke’s house wasn’t here to play politics; it was drawing battle lines.

Rook was, predictably, ecstatic about it all. “Ah, mon chevalier, what a splendid opportunity to honor beauty and justice with the art of the hunt!” he proclaimed, twirling dramatically as he readied his bow.

What you didn’t anticipate was his strange fixation on a handkerchief before he left.

Throughout the day, noblewomen approached Rook, each one batting their lashes and holding out dainty, embroidered handkerchiefs. It was practically a parade of desperate peahens.

“Oh, Lord Hunt, a token for luck!” cooed one particularly persistent lady, pushing her frilly kerchief toward him.

Rook clasped his hands to his chest with exaggerated reverence. “Ah, mademoiselle, your thoughtfulness moves me beyond words, but alas, I cannot accept. To carry such a treasure into the wild would be to risk its loss, and I could never bear such tragedy!”

Another woman attempted to loop her kerchief around his wrist directly. Rook gracefully dodged, as though she were offering him a live snake. “My dear lady, your artistry is unparalleled, but the only adornment fit for this hunt is the pure, untainted spirit of nature herself!”

By the third rejection, you were practically biting your tongue to keep from laughing.

But then came the curveball.

“Ah,” Rook sighed as he approached you. “If only I had a handkerchief imbued with sincerity. A simple, honest token to guide my aim and steady my heart!”

You blinked at him. “What, like…this?” You pulled out your completely ordinary, unembellished handkerchief and held it out.

Rook’s eyes lit up as though you’d just handed him the Holy Grail. “Mon chevalier! How perfect! How divine! This humble square of cloth shall be my guiding light!”

Before you could protest, he tied it around his arm with a flourish and rode off, looking like he was ready to star in his own personal opera.

From his place in the pavilion, Vil Schoenheit took a slow, deliberate sip of his tea, his sharp eyes locking onto yours with a glint of pure amusement. The smirk tugging at his lips seemed to say, Oh, I know exactly what’s going on.

Meanwhile, Epel squinted between you and Rook, his expression shifting rapidly as though he’d just cracked the secret to immortality. He whispered something to Vil, who nearly choked on his tea before regaining his composure.

What the hell is going on? you thought, baffled.

Fast forward to now, the present, where the plan was supposed to culminate with Rook triumphantly presenting his prize to the villainess. Simple, elegant, strategic.

So why, why, was Rook standing in front of you holding a literal griffin?

“Uh, Rook,” you whispered through gritted teeth. “What are you doing? This is supposed to go to the villainess.”

But Rook was having none of it.

“Ah, my loyal chevalier,” he declared loudly, drawing the attention of every noble in the vicinity. “It is only fitting that such a prize goes to the one who inspires my steadfastness and resolve!”

Your jaw dropped. “Rook. No.”

He turned his radiant smile on you, looking like a proud schoolboy showing off a crayon drawing to his teacher. “Yes!”

The gathered nobles erupted into murmurs, and you could already feel the weight of every single judgmental stare. This was not part of the plan. But despite your internal screaming, a small, annoying part of you couldn’t help but feel…flattered. This was a duke, and you were just a knight. A very confused, very underqualified knight, sure, but still.

Vil, still seated with his ever-present cup of tea, took another long, pointed sip, his eyes glimmering with amusement.

This was the drama he’d signed up for.

The hallway leading back to the room where Vil, Rook, and Epel were sitting felt oddly silent, the muffled voices of their conversation barely filtering through the door. You weren’t one to eavesdrop—but when you heard your name, well, curiosity got the better of you.

"Just confess already," Epel was saying, his tone exasperated. "We’ve all seen the way you look at them."

Vil chimed in, his voice tinged with amusement. "Epel is right for once, Rook. Love is about timing, and yours is abysmal."

"But love is an art, mon ami," Rook replied, his tone unusually hesitant. "It cannot be rushed. It must unfold naturally, like the petals of a flower in spring."

"Okay," Vil drawled, clearly unimpressed. "But what happens when someone else plucks your ‘flower’? Say, the gardener they’ve been spending so much time with?"

The silence that followed was deafening. You leaned closer, your heart pounding, hoping—no, needing—to hear Rook’s response.

Instead, you heard nothing.

The stillness stretched unbearably until you couldn’t take it anymore. You shoved the door open, startling all three occupants. "What are you talking about?"

Vil raised an eyebrow, the picture of nonchalance, though the corners of his mouth twitched with mischief. "Perfect timing, as always. I’ll leave you two to sort this out."

He grabbed a very reluctant Epel by the collar and dragged him toward the door. "Wait, I wanna see what happens!" Epel protested, but Vil shut the door behind them with a decisive click.

Which left you and Rook alone.

You crossed your arms, leveling him with a look that you hoped masked the frantic hammering of your heart. "So…what’s this about a confession?"

Rook’s usual composure faltered. For once, the poetic, perpetually self-assured Rook you knew looked…unsure. Vulnerable. His hands fidgeted with the hem of his gloves, and he avoided your gaze, staring instead at the floor.

"Rook," you said softly, stepping closer. "Please, just tell me what’s going on. I need to know."

He finally looked up, and the raw emotion in his eyes was enough to steal your breath.

"Mon chevalier," he began, his voice low and trembling, "I have loved you from the start. At first, it was the camaraderie of equals, a kindred spirit I admired. But when you returned from the heroine’s side, defying expectations and staying true to yourself…you captured my heart completely."

You blinked, stunned. "Rook, I—"

He continued, the words spilling out as though he’d been holding them back for far too long. "You never treated me like I was strange. You accepted me as I am, even when others mocked my passions or dismissed my eccentricities. I never truly needed a bodyguard. I just needed you. Near me. Always."

His voice broke slightly on the last word, and you felt your resolve crumble.

You sighed, but it wasn’t from exasperation. It was the sound of relief, of something clicking into place. "Next time," you said, stepping even closer, "just tell me your feelings directly. It’ll save us both a lot of trouble."

Before he could respond, you reached up and pulled him into a kiss.

It was everything a first kiss should be—long, searing, passionate. His arms wrapped around you instinctively, pulling you flush against him as though he never wanted to let go. You melted into him, your hands sliding up to tangle in his hair, and for a moment, the world outside that kiss ceased to exist.

When you finally broke apart, both of you were breathless. Rook’s lips quirked into a smile as he whispered, "Your lips are the sweetest arrow, mon amour, and they have pierced my heart beyond repair."

You burst into laughter, burying your face in the crook of his neck to muffle the sound. "Gods, Rook, only you could ruin a moment like this with something so cheesy."

He chuckled softly, his arms still secure around you.

And as you stood there in his embrace, you couldn’t help but think that this ridiculous, trashy novel world was the best thing that had ever happened to you.

The parlor was warm with the golden light of afternoon sun filtering through the windows, but the atmosphere buzzed with anticipation. You stood near Rook, his arm casually draped across the back of your chair, as Vil and Epel looked at you expectantly.

“Well?” Vil prompted, raising a perfectly arched brow.

You glanced at Rook, who smiled encouragingly, as if to say, go ahead. Clearing your throat, you announced, “We’re…together.”

Vil sighed dramatically, setting down his teacup with a soft clink. “Finally. I was starting to think I’d have to intervene.”

Epel, on the other hand, froze mid-sip of his cider. Slowly, he set the glass down, stood, and walked over to you. His expression was a mix of grief and dread, like someone had just informed him of some terrible, life-altering news.

He placed both hands firmly on your shoulders and looked you dead in the eyes. “Good luck,” he said, solemn as a funeral bell. “This is a life sentence, y’know.”

Rook chuckled, clearly amused. “Mon cher Epel, you wound me! Surely being with moi is more of a treasure than a trial?”

Epel turned to him, unimpressed. “Treasure? You follow people for fun. You recite poetry to wild animals. You can’t even eat pie without analyzing its existential meaning. I mean, who does that?”

You were already laughing, shaking your head as you patted Epel’s hand reassuringly. “Don’t worry, Epel. This is a sentence I’m more than happy to serve.”

Vil smirked behind his tea, watching the scene unfold with obvious amusement. “Frankly, I’m just relieved we won’t have to endure any more of his tragic sighs every time you left a room.”

Rook clasped a hand to his heart in mock offense. “Oh, Vil! My sighs are poetry incarnate!”

Vil didn’t even blink. “Your sighs are the sound of unspoken melodrama. Spare me.”

Epel plopped back into his seat with a long groan, running a hand through his hair. “Anyway, I guess congratulations or whatever. At least now we can all stop pretending we don’t notice him staring at you like some love-struck puppy.”

“That’s rich,” you shot back, grinning. “You’re the one who looks like your pet rat just died every time we get close.”

Epel huffed. “I’m just saying! Now you gotta deal with him being even more poetic! And clingy! You thought the prince and heroine were bad? Wait till you see Rook when he’s in love. You’re doomed.”

At the mention of the prince and heroine, Vil made an exaggerated sound of disgust. “Speaking of those two… Honestly, has anyone ever been so painfully predictable? The prince has all the charm of wet cardboard, and the heroine—don’t even get me started on her hair ribbons.”

“Ah, the heroine,” Rook sighed wistfully, but there was a glint of mischief in his eyes. “Always so delightfully transparent. Her schemes are like open windows to her soul.”

You snorted. “If by soul, you mean her desperate attempts to turn everything into a sob story, then yeah, sure.”

Epel leaned forward, grinning. “Did you see her crying at the hunt competition? Like, girl, it’s a competition. What did you think would happen? That the griffin would apologize and hand itself over?”

Vil smirked, tapping a manicured finger against his chin. “Or how about the prince declaring his ‘eternal devotion’ to her at the banquet last week? I nearly choked on my wine.”

Rook chuckled, turning to you with a soft smile that was far more genuine than his usual theatrics. “Ah, but let us not waste all our words on such trivialities. This moment, mon amour, is one of joy.”

You leaned into him, your laughter subsiding into a contented smile. His arm slipped around your shoulders, holding you close as Vil and Epel continued their playful bickering in the background.

For the first time since you’d been thrown into this absurd world, you felt completely at ease. If this was the result of being trapped in a trash novel, then so be it. You were exactly where you wanted to be.

Trash Novel Masterlist

Complete Masterlists

#twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #twst #twisted wonderland #rook hunt x reader #rook x reader #rook hunt #rook x you #rook hunt x you #rook #trash novel chronicles

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wangxianficfinder · 1 month ago

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Fic Finder

Jan 10th

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1. Hi! Happy New Year! I hope 2025 is a blessed year for you all!

For FF: I read a LJY/LSZ fic a couple years back and I thought i bookmarked it but can’t find it now. It’s where LJY developed a voice cultivation(?). He was not vibing with any instruments so he used his voice. He also almost die saving LSZ on a night hunt. Both became quite a legend themselves among the juniors and guest disciples.

Thank you for all your hard work! @bitemepotter

FOUND! anyway, here’s wuji by kakikaeru (T, 18k, ZhuiYi, WangXian, Post-Canon, Canon-Typical Violence)

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2. Heya, looking for a fic but only remember one little thing about it. It had a scene where Jiang Yanli and Jin Guangyao had tea and JYL ended up poisoning JGY. I think she might have been testing him but he failed it but I'm not sure if it was this one or some other fic :')

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3. Happy new year! Thank you for all your help. I have a fic finder request, please! The story was a long canon au with red-string-of-fate soulmate mechanics. Lan Zhan and Wei Ying followed their string to meet during the Cloud Recesses lectures, but Wei Ying cut it during the golden core transfer (or maybe the transfer... withered it? blackened it? I can’t remember). The fic then picks up when Wei Ying is brought back to life and the red thread forms between them again, allowing Lan Zhan to find Wei Ying again. I would love to read this story again! If anyone has any clues, please share. Thank you!

FOUND? the heartlines on our hands by occultings (microcomets) (E, 47k, wangxian, Soulmates AU, Angst with a Happy Ending, Mutual Pining, First Time, Canon Divergence, Canonical Character Death)

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4. HI! For the FF: I saved a great line from a fic but *didn't* save the title, so now that I want to re-read the fic, I'm stumped. Thank you and the Hive Mind for any help. The line is: A-Ran had flung himself at A-Yuan like he was a landslide and A-Yuan was a badly built village. @songscloset

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5. Hey yall! I hate to add to your load, especially when I know it’s a fic you’ve found before, but scrolling through I can’t seem to find that silly fic where lxc was in denial about wangxian’s marriage and kept giving lwj marriage offerings. Hopefully it’ll be easy for you to find since I know I saw it on this blog

FOUND? happy not knowing by plonk (Not Rated, 16k, WangXian, Canon Era, Canon Divergence, Established Relationship)

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6. Hello lovely mods, I think I'm losing my mind. I saw two wangxian fics on ao3 recently that I planned to come back to but then couldn't find again with (various permutations of) the same tags. Did I dream them? Halp!

A) First fic: it was a modern au, something about fashionista LWJ, and WWX in a dress or feminized in some way. I think it was a PWP where it starts with them going out to dinner but may be mistaken on that point.

B) Second fic: time travel fix it but it's jin guangyao traveling back. There's something about how he'll do anything to make lan xichen smile, and that's how wwx becomes his problem. In the notes it mentions how jin guangyao remains as morally grey as ever, or something like that.

Do these stories exist outside of my head??!

TIA ❤️ @themoonmothwrites

6A)

FOUND? Cute Femboy Gets ~*HUGE SURPRISE!!!*~ by ScarlettStorm (E, 32k, WangXian, Modern AU, onlyfans au, Porn, sex worker wwx, Adhd wwx, autistic lz, Fashionista lz, Nonbinary NHS, genderfluid WWX, Feminization, (absolutely not forced and in fact very desired feminization), Date Night, Fluff and Smut, Established Relationship, Gender Exploration)

6B)

FOUND? Shards of Hope by Dreaming_Days (T, 89k, XiYao, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, Redemption, Character Study)

FOUND? I Have Been Selfish, Too by osiesaur (M, 176k, 3zun, background wangxian, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, POV Outsider, Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, JGY's Customer Service Smile, JGY Scheming is Used for Good, Scheming NHS, Protective NHS, 3zun | Venerated Triad Dynamics, Anxiety, PTSD, Mental Health Issues, Chronic Pain, Chronic Illness, canon typical abuse and bigotry, rated M for violence, The Kissing is Rated T) If the one alreasy recced for 6b isn't it and the person is going based just on a recall of summary+tags rather than having read the fic, 6b sounds like it could also be I have been selfish too. It's jgy pov + time travel + save wwx to make lxc happy. jgy just isn't the one time traveling.

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7. Hello. I search a fic but i just remember a moment of the fic + some infos: Wei Wuxian is taken in by the clan Lan after have been too much punished by Madam Yu. He's betrothed to Lan Zhan, adopted by the Lan Clan and at a point adopt baby Yuan. The scene that i remember is when Madam Yu visits Guzu and sees Wei Wuxian (with A-Yuan in his arms) and she uses Zadian at him. Huaisang, who was there, protect Wei Wuxian and is hurt by the whip. After that, both Madam Ju and Jiang Cheng have problem with both the clans Nie and the Lan. Thank you for you help.

FOUND? Consequences by Remma3760 (Not Rated, 58k, WangXian, XiSu, XuanLi, Canonical Child Abuse, Abusive YZY, Good Uncle LQR, WWX is a Lan, Accidental Baby Acquisition, Bad Parents JFM and YZY)

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8. Hi, I'm looking for a fic where gusu lan elders mind control WWX or smth into following all the rules when LWJ wasn't around.

I think it was a rec on wangxianficrecs but I can't find it anymore. It had an excerpt like, Sizhui was leading LWJ into the Jingshi and WWX was sitting at the table with perfect posture and stuff. Sizhui said smth like, " He's not hurt but acting weird." @shylurker111

FOUND! Perfect to Me by theearlymorningmist (T, 12k, WangXian, Protective LWJ, Good Uncle LQR, Yunmeng Siblings Feels, JC & WWX Reconciliation, Gusu Lan Elders Bashing, Curses, WWX is Loved, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Good Nephew JL, Protective JL)

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9. Hi so I'm trying to find a podfic that I have no idea what the name is and I really want to listen to it so here's what I remember lwj's big brother was awake and doing some stuff in the kitchen or whatever and wondering why his little brother is not awake yet so he goes to his baby brother's room trying not to feel guilty about it because he knows that his brother wakes up at the same time as him 5:00 a.m. you know at the jazz and so when he opens his door he sees his brother and wwx in this bed curled up together I was like very confused until later where they explained that wwx got kicked out by madam yu for something or another and that I don't remember and so wwx stays with them until they go to college it's a modern au @constancebloodstone

FOUND? Found Family by fyredancer (T, 10k, WangXian, Modern AU, Fluff, Getting Together, POV Outsider, Dysfunctional Family, Coming Out, Bad Parenting, Protective Older Brothers, Protective Siblings, [Podfic of] Found Family by Fyredancer by AuntieIroh)

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10. Hi! I want to find ff which is about wwx being traumatized because of zidian and he is also scared of storms/lighting (?). there was some kind of scene after he punched peacock in face that madam yu was about to punish him however lan wangji protected him. thanks a lot!

FOUND! Thunderstorm in the Library Pavilion by ZamaShines (M, 22k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, Hurt/Comfort, Bad Parent YZY, Abusive YZY, Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Whipping, Astraphobia, phobia - thunder, Thunderstorms, Panic Attacks, WWX Has Self-Esteem Issues, WWX Needs a Hug, and gets the hug, Good Sibling JC, Good Uncle LQR, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fix-It of Sorts)

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11. Hello! For Fic Finder please: I am looking for a fic (possibly two) where Wei Wuxian played GusuLan music during the Phoenix Mountain hunt, which other disciples recognized and they all clamored "why do you know Gusu folk music?" I think I might be confusing two fics though, and if either or both could be found that would be great! In my first thought WWX used Lan musical cultivation songs to help on the hunt (maybe to calm down crazed disciples?) and the Lan disciples got angry that an outsider knew Lan sect secret music. The other thought is that it was when WWX was blindfolded and resting in the tree he played Lan folk music, and I think a commotion was caused by disciples thinking he was trying to seduce Jiang Yanli but Madame Jin defends him saying she recognized the songs and that they were harmless. I can't remember if these two scenes came from the same fic or from two separate fics. Any help would be much appreciated, thank you! @gloriousclotpole

FOUND? Until The End by abCEE (M, 365k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, war changes people, no pinning, LWJ learns how to speak, WWX is not oblivious, Established Relationship, wangxian are married and have a son, Mpreg, Good Uncle LQR, a little grey LWJ, a bit of JC bashing from LWJ, BAMF JYL, 16 years of yearning, Canon-Typical Violence, LSZ is LWJ & WWX's Child, WWX Has a New Golden Core, Canonical Character Death - WWX, Canon Rewrite, Happy Ending, Fix-It of Sorts) WWX is playing Yunmeng folk songs, not Gusu ones, but the latter do come up in discussion after he finishes playing; the scene is about two thirds into the first chapter

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12. it's a fic where WWx, JC, and JFM are on a night hunt and everything goes wrong, JFM dies and JC's golden core is destroyed, YYZ has WQ do a golden core transfer, and after WQ takes WWX back with her against YYZ will. Meanwhile WN steals WWX body camera which recorded the whole process

FOUND? 🧡🔒 Truth Will Out (when caught on video) - End_OTW_Racism! by KizuKatana (E, 178k, WangXian, WN & WWX & WQ, graphic depictions of violence, modern cultivation, canon divergence, YZY abuses WWX, caught on camera, partial core removal, WWX kicked out of Jiang sect, livestreamer WWX, meet ugly, dual cultivation, smut, no war)

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13. For ff please! I am looking for a canon-divergent au where Wei Wuxian was some kind of creature shapeshifter, and his animal instincts gave him pack instincts which in turn caused him to fuss over and mother many of his same-age companions (like Jiang Cheng and Jiang Yanli, Nie Huaisang, Wen Ning, I think Jin Zixuan and a few others). I feel like this kept cropping up at the Gusu Lectures because the other sects didn’t know Wei Wuxian was a shapeshifter so everyone thought he was just a mother hen-type friend. At some point he whipped out some territorial/protective mothering and protected the students against … someone? Maybe on a night hunt? I can’t remember. Any thoughts? Thank you!

FOUND? 🔒 flame and rust by Reverie (cl410) (M, 34k, WangXian, Dragon WWX, The BSSR lineage are dragons, Canon Divergence, Happy Ending, BAMF WWX, Child Abuse, via Madam Yu, Fluff and Humor, Protective Siblings, Time Skips, Supportive LQR, Angst, Golden Core Reveal, Good Uncle LQR)

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14. I am looking for a fic where Wei Wuxian hid in Lotus Pier after the Sunshot Campaign. With Jiang Cheng's help he disguised himself as a frail woman and the cover story was that "she" was a Jiang cousin or something, come to take refuge. I think Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng even pretended to get engaged to further the disguise. Everything was revealed comedically at a Jin conference where *shock and awe* Wei Wuxian couldn't help himself from flirting with Lan Wangji. Would love to read this again!

FOUND? By Any Other Name by ShanaStoryteller (Not Rated, 31k, Wangxian, Canon Divergence, Crossdressing, Misunderstandings, Identity Porn, Identity reveal) this one is similar, except it's not after the Sunshot Campaign, it's when WWX wakes up in MXYs body, except MXY did the ritual a bit too early and as a result, WWXs soul isn't properly seated in the body so he's frail / though wwx & jc are assumed to be engaged, rather than pretending to be

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15. Hello, I am looking for a fic where LZ and WY first meet at some kind of music summer camp as teenagers. LZ quickly decides that they are dating, while WY is under the impression that they’re a camp-only couple. Every year, LZ also has a detailed schedule of things to do together since they can’t see each other for long. They eventually clear up their relationship status misunderstanding and go to college together. Thanks!

FOUND! I think 15 is Chapter 3 in this threadfic/chat fic collection by x_los

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16. Okay, I've been looking for this fic for the last few days, but I really need some help. So WangXian are arranged married, I'm very sertain it's canon divergent and the war doesn't/hasn't happened yet. WWX tries very much to become a productive member of the Lan clan, but his efforts are unappreciated, and the only thing he's allowed to help with is some basic talisman that any junior can do. He can't leave because he doesn't want to shame the Jiangs and also doesn't have any money because Madame Yu negotiated his marriage contract to put him at a disadvantage. LWJ doesn't yet know how to defend WWX and doesn't go against his family, but he eventually realizes that he hasn't been a good husband and cries about it to LXC because he doesn't know what to do. In the end, WWX secretly tries to destroy Lan Yi's Yin metal and wad willing to sacrifice himself because it's the only thing he believes he is useful for, LWJ stops him and it ends about there.

FOUND? Concord by Deastar (T, 41k, WangXian, Arranged Marriage, Gūsū Lán Sect Rules, Depression, Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending)

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17. Hiyaaaa I am back with another request hehe. It's where Wei Ying thinks that Lan Zhan is dead and then he dreams about Lan Zhan a lot during the 16 years of his punishment (because he turns himself in to the sects). But then he was invited to the Nie sect by Nie Huaisang and he actually meets Lan Zhan who is alive and he still thinks that he is dreaming and breaks down in front of Lan Zhan, Lan Xichen and Nie Mingjue and Lan Zhan looks at his brother with betrayed eyes because Lan Xichen hid the fact that Lan Zhan is alive from Wei Ying deliberately. Thanks!!!! @yilinglaobunny

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18. Not sure if it was on AO3 or here on tumblr (although I have a feeling that the latter is more likely), but I'd love to re-read this fic where WWX (I think in MXY's body) staged Qin Su's death and got her safely out of KT and into CR. He then of course got blamed for murder before things were revealed. Thank you! 🖤🐇 @linderel

Yes, I think that's it! I may have been partially mixing up two fics in my mind but this is the predominant one. Even got lucky and hit the correct chapter on the first try, heh.

FOUND! Love Song In Reverse by timetoboldlygo (T, 237k, WangXian, Amnesia, Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Falling In Love, Slow Burn, agressively mixing and matching novel and cql canon, No Homophobia, Mentions of Starvation, Parental WWX) I think that's one of the later plot points in Love Song in Reverse, by timetoboldlygo.

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19. Fic Finder request please!

WWX dies via being thrown into a pit with some awful entity and comes back all wrong. I only remember this scene where he threw up Wen Chao’s sword or skull in the middle of a meeting? Idk which one and LWJ is just being super horny for him even though it’s clear that something is very wrong with WWX. I tried searching tags and I can’t find this. Plz help!! 😭😭😭

FOUND! You are what you eat by deliciousblizzardshark (E, 17k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Eldritch WWX, Horny LWJ, Body Horror, Possession, of a sort, Cannibalism, kind of, Mild Gore, Teeth, Fluff and Humor, Smut, Oral Sex, Anal Sex, Monster sex, Switching, Light BDSM, Rimming, Self-Lubrication, Seriousness treated Crackily, Implied/Referenced Torture, Dead WWX, 🔒[Podfic] You are what you eat by irrationalpie) One of the best 3H - horny, humor, horror - in Fandom, a yummy 🤣treat😍

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20.I’m looking for a wangxian fic where they are both ballet dancers and they are doing Matthew bourne’s all-male version of swan lake, and lwj and wwx dance it while having a debate about whether or not it is a gay romance. Thank you!

FOUND? space, skin, muscle, bone by tombenough_and_continent (T, 23k, WangXian, Modern AU, Matthew Bourne's Swan Lake, Non-Linear Narrative, Dance, Background SongXiao, background NieLan, a surprising amount of texting, gratuitous use of ballet terminology)

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#wangxian #mdzs #wangxian fic finder #wangxian fic search #the untamed #wangxianficfinder #long post

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ladyofthehightower · 27 days ago

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the fandom made me team green

When I started watching House of The Dragon I had literally no preference for team green or team black, because I didn't know there were teams to pick. I had only ever been a casual Game of Thrones enjoyer, but I recognised Matt Smith from Doctor Who in the trailer and therefore got excited.

I had no knowledge of the plot, no knowledge of any characters or plot points, I didn't even remember that the dance and Rhaenyra had been mentioned in GoT. I wasn't aware of Fire & Blood.

Immediately upon watching I fell in love with the characters of Rhaenyra Targaryen and Alicent Hightower, without knowledge of what would happen between them. I even tweeted like damn! these girls gay!

to which someone replied... You'll never guess what's about to happen. And I didn't. Alicent marrying Viserys was... not in my cards, but it was clear to me that she was a victim in that situation!

Colour me surprised then when, around episode 2 or 3 of season 1, I joined the fandom for real and found out that everyone HATED Alicent. THIS GIRL??

While I was "neutral" at first, I was absolutely pushed into team green and that side of the fandom seeing how team black was acting on twitter. The way they weaponised real life issues to act like preferring one group of fictional characters makes you morally superior did absolutely not sit right with me.

And when I then realised that oh... this is about the book—at which point I knew that the show and books were clearly telling different stories—I completely lost interest in taking those people seriously. If you cannot separate two clearly different stories then I'm not gonna treat you like an intelligent person, because you're not. If you refuse to do it, then I'm not gonna treat you like an adult, because you're not.

Often I find that team black analysing is based in ignoring character POV's and thinking everyone who isn't on their knees for Rhaenyra is an evil villain with no function except BE EVIL. They claim to be the only ones who understand that HoTD is a story about misogyny, but spew it carelessly about Alicent and Helaena, and about the actors behind those characters!

Takes like this only makes sense if you completely ignore their history (which, as I touched on in my Driftmark post, is an unfortunate trend in this fandom lol) as well as Alicent's perspective in this moment. It simplifies the situation like crazy to make Alicent appear evil. It's boring and just bad, frankly.

I think it goes without saying that there are, of course, weirdos and freaks on both sides of the fandom and that not everyone who likes team black is a fucking loser, nor is everyone who likes team green an intelligent person! In every fandom there will be people who cannot act like grown up people, despite being in their 20s and older.

Anyway. Happy 2025 :)

#house of the dragon #alicent hightower #rhaenyra targaryen #anti team black #another long ass post bye

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tare-anime · 28 days ago

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SxF Mission 110

(Beware spoilers)

Woah! That was such a scary jumpscare 🥶🥶

Endo would you please stop doing that with Donnie??? Gosh..... 😅😅😅

Anyway, this chapter make me relieved.

Before this chapter, I was conflicted.

I know and I believe Loid is a good man. He has good heart and really wants what best for everyone. However he also was known to be such a perfectionist when doing his job, and he's so good at it. Of course he is not a stranger to anything by any means necessary to achieve his goals. That's the grey morale of his character.

Logically speaking, as the spy it is such a waste of opportunity if he suggest Melinda to leave her husband to end her suffering. But... that's exactly what he did. And he was sincere when he told Melinda that he knows Melinda is suffering by being with Donovan (showed by the transparent speech bubble).

He acknowledge that there are types of abusive behaviour. Physical and verbal. And he acknowledge that Melinda is enduring a great deal of stress.

This.... is a waaaaaaayyyy more better portrayal of how Loid doing his job as a psychiatrist. Miles better than his session with the Tutor Residence chapter.

His analysis and approach is way more compassionate while at the same time, he is showing a professional side.

Aside from being compassionate, Loid also managed to push his mission forward.

And by doing that, we now know another information: Melinda (and Demetrius) believes that Donovan can read minds.

I know this theory has been going around for quite sometimes. Especially with Anya being an experimental result herself, and Donovan has two identical scars on his head, in the more or less identical position of Anya's hairclip.

But....... I'm going with the unpopular opinion here.

I say no, Donovan cannot read minds.

My theory: He might be undergo an experimentation to gain such ability, but he himself is a failure. However, Donovan does uses the rumor regarding his ability to read minds to its fullest potential. That is using the rumor to control the people and ensure he maintains his political power. He might even has few trusted inner circle who actively spreading this rumors.

And that's why Donnie was so happy during that disasterous "family dinner" several chapters back. Donnie can confirm that the rumor still has its effect to his own family. A very few "outer ring" people who has direct contact with him.

But, that's it. It's just rumors being used to its potential in giving suggestive thoughts upon others.

Because, plot wise, that would be unmatch with what Endo has been building, and creating a plot hole as mentioned by Endo himself via Loid's inner thoughts.

Not to say that if Donnie really can read minds, it means he already know Loid was a spy from their very first contact.

But honestly, I don't know where Endo planned with this.

Maybe this will lead to Anya's backstory??? 👀

Either way, we can only wait and let Endo cooks his story 🤭🤭🤭

Next chapter is a short chapter, iirc 🤔 so maybe we will know something in 4 weeks.

PS:

I love how Loid said thank you to Yor, and didn't actually convey what thing that make him thanked her. Since the parenteses was in his inner thoughts 🤣🤣

But he was being genuine (thank you Anya). And that's what matter 🥰🥰

#spy x family #loid forger #melinda desmond #donovan desmond #anya forger #yor forger #sxf manga #sxf manga spoilers #sxf manga spoiler #spoiler #spoilers #sxf chapter review #sxf chapter analysis #sxf mission 110 #sxf chapter 110

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voidartisan · 1 month ago

Text

Anyway. Survived another semester. So. Star Wars characters as things my friends, professors, and classmates have said (plus a few things i've overheard on campus). two for the price of one bc in spring I forgor

Echo: Fives! GO!

Fives: NO! It's a free country!

Fives: *starts singing Republic anthem*

Echo: you can't sing the national anthem and BE A COWARD!!!

Ahsoka: Maybe they just really wanted there to be a gay weasel

Barriss: Hello. We were just talking about how my grandma's dog has a foot fetish

Sabine, in a class discussing ancient Egyptian art: Okay, don't hate me for this question, but, in the movie The Mummy---

Anakin: I didn't hit him that hard!

Obi-Wan: YOU BROKE HIS NOSE.

Omega: How’d you get those washboard abs, grandma?

Rex: I'd never say anything like that to you on purpose. You're like a daughter to me.

Echo: Thank you

Kanan: I watched two squirrels fighting in the middle of the street this morning. Kinda gave me Hector and Achilles

Din Djarin: WHO IS THIS BABY?

Rex: WHO DID YOU MARRY????

Luke: OH! I got t-boned to this song! :D

Kanan: Thou art the bomb dot com

Hound, dreamily: I want my ashes tested for narcotics

Thorn: They got a dried llama fetus. From Bolivia

Thire: Not the llama fetus

Jesse: Do you eat the cherry pits?

Kix: No? I'm pretty sure those have cyanide in them.

Jesse: *slowly removes cherry pit from mouth*

Obi-Wan: You'd think that with my very high reading level I would have figured that out sooner

Ahsoka: I mean, Yoda's made it that long

Barriss: Okay, but he's filled with happiness and good thoughts. I'm filled with bitterness and ibuprofen.

Ahsoka: This is why we have repentance and insurance

Cody, speaking to a spider in the shower: First of all, you're a pervert

Wooley, awake at 1 am: Next time, we should do drugs

Ezra: I thought I was about to have my Snow White moment, but instead, I almost got rabies

Leia: I'm trying to tell a story, and you're BOOGIEING

Hunter: I like where I am.

Phee: Surrounded by girls?

Hunter: No. Dirt.

Ventress: Give that man some cleavage

Riyo: When I say I've got that dog in me, it's Snoopy

Crosshair: If I was a bird, I would be homicidal

Luke: They made him straight. And SAD.

Wrecker: I don't need you to tell me what to do, number man!

Quinlan: Hear me out---

Luminara: You are NOT allowed to say that

Anakin: Arsonists are easy to catch. They leave a bunch of evidence.

Ahsoka: Like fire?

Anakin: Like fire.

Anakin, to Obi-Wan: You like blondes so blond that you can't tell if they have receding hairlines or not

Leia: I have no moral code when it comes to my father.

Hunter: I just love you, okay?

Crosshair: Okay.

Hunter: And I'm gonna slap you in the face the next time I see you.

Phee: They de-'tismed my boy

Fives, singing weakly, laying the wrong way on a mattress, with his legs up against the wall and head and arms hanging off the edge: 🎶H-O-T-T-O-G-O, you can take me hot to go~🎶

Anakin: *shows Ahsoka a clip of the Grinch*

Ahsoka: How did they get live footage of you?

Obi-Wan: What were you saying?

Quinlan: I forgot

Obi-Wan: I know; I was just asking out of courtesy

Luke: A FULL rye chip?! Alms for the poor!

Ventress: Hold on, he's gonna do the slutty cape wave again

Rig Nema: He died of a pulmonary embolism

Kix: Happens to the best of us

Ezra: Should I have known that talking in a spoon in my mouth would make it fall? PROBABLY. But what if this ONE TIME it was DIFFERENT

Hera, abruptly: I need to start listening to more ABBA

Tech: I'm too weird and I need to get weirder.

Obi-Wan: Dead husband. With cancer. At least it's in a nice font.

Satine: Hmm. No.

Obi-Wan: I'm sorry, would it be easier to break the news in Times New Roman?

Phee: I am a very patient woman in terms of patience

Fives: *hands Tup his toast in order to take a picture of Jesse lying next to the trashcan*

Fives: *takes picture*

Fives: *holds out hand* Toast me

Padme: He can make that Perry the Platypus noise- and I think that's hot, by the way-

Echo: I’m going to commit a crime if I have to move these gnomes again

Kanan: My gym skills are akin to a headless chicken attempting hopscotch

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fangdokja · 6 days ago

Note

Hiya! Is it okay to ask who your favorite OC is so far? I'm just so curious, that's all! God Bless ^^!!!

((also unrelated:was I hallucinating or did you have Ichiya from variable baricade as a header before??? He's one of my fave otome guys, I genuinely love his pathetic meow meow vibes, especially that crying CG—))

— Lear

WARNING: Prepare for unstructured (OOC?) Fang Dokja rambling. Because I'm exposing myself in excitement again nuuuu. ALSO SPOILERS. Basically rare times of me posting being weird.

Yandere! Russian! Mafia Boss. No questions. That man can choke and kill me and I'd let him. Joke. My husband would kill me whahahahaha.

Above all, my husband is ALWAYS my favorite of course. Always will be, and nobody can compare. Technically in "Her Hell, His Heaven." I'm writing it with my husband and I in mind, so my favorite is obviously that. But for existing Yandere! OC's?

Anyways, I would say there are two ways to answer this. As a READER, my top 3 are:

♡ Main Story. 🔞"I trusted you, wife, and now I'll teach you what betrayal feels like."

#1: Yandere! Russian! Mafia Boss - Daddy Dom who can and will kill you. Yes. Please choke and desecrate me Daddy. Yes.

Also there's good reason why I made the banner one of my favorite manga story + art style of all time = Brutal: Satsujin Kansatsukan No Kokuhaku. I don't simp for Hiroki Dan but he's both relatable and incredibly funny to me. Also plot is plotting. Fav arc and punishment was the woman gang rape + assault + date drugging arc. Second arc. Graphic and realistic, also the punishments are always satisfying. One of the manga I reread regularly until today.

Yes, I love unhinged + unapologetic + black flags + sadistic men who will hurt and kill you. Yummmyyyy. Why? Reminds me of my husband. Don't ask. *sweats*

Yandere! Zombie Apocalypse! Survivor

♡ Sub Story. In the world of the dead, he was the only thing keeping you alive—and tearing you apart.

Headcanons 1 : Flesh and Fetish (General)

In a world where only the strongest survive, he’s the monster you can't escape.

#2: Yandere! Zombie Apocalypse! Survivor

I love morally grey men who love to make people suffer. Yes, even if it's with the one he loves. I'm weird I know. Hm... I do like the worldbuilding since I've always loved zombie apocalypse stories and worlds. But, he's ayt.

Yandere! Marine Corps & Good Girl

Oneshots

He crushed a man’s skull beneath his boot and turned to you with a smile.

"You’ll never escape me—not when I’m the only one keeping you alive."

#3: Yandere! Marine Corps

Basically me picking what reminds me of my husband. Don't really have anything that reminds me solely of him tbh.

For numbers 2-3, I can't pick anything else tbh. A lot of the characters I write can have my husband's qualities, but I never write my husband so... I can only find certain parts I can see; but a lot of times, I don't write my husband because that's weird haha.

As a WRITER (OK THIS HAS MORE ANALYSIS). Meaning it's about the way I constructed these characters especially, their behavior as yanderes + psychological horror-thriller content:

Yandere! Author

Headcanons 1 : Fate’s Final Draft (General)

He’s the hero in his own story… and you’re his latest toy.

🔞"You like happy endings? Too bad. I don’t write those."

#1: Yandere! Author - Not to be weird and all, but I based him off on both Scar from Wuthering Waves and myself.

For me, I wrote it because I genuinely like making characters suffer. Yes, I admit it. No one is safe. It's why I love writing grimdark stories. To me, in all honesty? Happiness is not relatable to me, especially fluff and slice-of-life (but I can read and enjoy it). It's suffering and hardships that I relate to most. So, I wrote a character that I based off my writing style in essence.

Haven't fully captured personality, but attempted and inspired by Scar.

Now for the Scar part: Personality wise we're nothing alike. But I love Scar's personality and eccentric actions + theatrics, ever since I saw him. Like seriously. He's chaotic, unapologetic and honestly I love moral dilemmas. ALSO HIS FACE IS SO EXPRESSIVE, he's theatrical. I love it.

The story he gave when talking to Rover, well, I really loved it. Relatable and psychological. YES. I AM HARDCORE SCAR MAIN. WHERE IS HIS BANNER FUDGE. Like there's this new pirate blue haired guy that gives ENTP vibes. WHERE IS SCAR. WHERE IS HIS BANNER COMING. WUWAAAAAA.

Am I a simp? Fudge no. I don't simp for him. But I relate hardcore to him. He's one of my top tier I-relate-to-so-much characters. Yeah, I wouldn't say I'm like him personality wise. Definitely not. But morally wise? Like I just love it. I really liked the storyline of WuWa, not sure how it's going but FREAKING SO MANY RELATABLE MALE CHARACTERS.

I don't simp for any WuWa males. But.... I relate: Jiyan, Geshu Lin, Scar, Xiangli Yao, Rover. YES I RELATE TO ALL OF THEM. FREAKING I FOUND JIYAN'S STORY SO SAD AND RELATABLE LIKE WWATTTT. Xiangli Yao's story is also sad but for me JIYAN STORY TOP TIER. ALSO YES, I REALLY LOVE THE DYSTOPIAN VIBES OF WUWA.

I LITERALLY READ ACTUAL LORE LIKE THE NOTEBOOKS YOU FIND????? or papers and shiz? I READ. EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. OF IT. YES. EVEN THE SIDE QUESTS AND EVENTS. I don't do that when gaming. So you can tell I really loved the story of WuWa. For others, it's crap. But for me, I hardcore related to it and I enjoyed it.

Me to myself: tryard.

Me: Shut up.

Me: SHIZ. you're making me want to get back into WuWa. *cries in no Scar banner* Though I do love the pirate vibes.

Hopefully story hasn't gone downhill.... anyways.

Yandere! Russian! Mafia Boss

Headcanons 1 : The Bride of Blood (General)

To him, you're perfect. To you, he's just a mission.

🔞"I don't need your love, I need your submission."

#2: Yandere! Russian! Mafia Boss - Up next, torture simulator.

I made Yandere! Russian! Mafia Boss + Yandere! Spanish! Pirate Captain + Yandere! Alpha! Hybrid Wolf around the same time. When making each story, I basically thought....

"How much can I make the protagonist suffer?"

Literally my thoughts. How far can I take this? It's also one of the reasons why making the sequels are a challenge. I am making all of the sequels, since a lot of people requested. But, it's a challenge because I wrote every one of these stories as original standalones. I was literally like ".... wait. You want more???"

But I welcomed the challenge. Difficult but still doable.

Anyways, I enjoyed writing his most because his torture scenes are peak quality among all my works so far. I think that's the main reason why. Personality wise? He's still emotional to me. Not like my husband. BRUH, sorry, my husband is like really....really, REALLY, like uhhh, I don't know, but Yandere! Russian! Mafia Boss is still emotional in general.

When I mean emotional, I don't mean he's stupid or reckless. He's still methodical and loyal even, but he's also driven by a need to prove something and to claim control again.

But, I wouldn't say I like him emotionally, more of the way I made the torture. Yes. Simply. That's it. ahhahahaa

Now for third, I don't really have an all-time favorite, but one I do remember off the bat that impacted me was because of how I wrote and ended the story:

Yandere! Stepfather & Stepdaughter

Novella 1 : Paternal Privilege

He’s your family, but he doesn’t act like it.

🔞Pleasure in every strike, pain in every kiss.

🔞In the end, love is both their salvation and their damnation.

🔞His love is suffocating, but she’s forgotten how to breathe without it.

🔞Love shouldn’t feel like drowning, but he’s the only one who can save her.

She fell, but not by accident. He made sure of it.

#3: Yandere! Stepfather - For this, sure, Daddy's hot. But, it's not just that. What I enjoyed when writing this story was the plot itself. Especially the ENDING.

What I was thinking of when making this is basically, "Let's distract the Readers with so much sex that they don't notice what's happening underneath. Use sex and erotica as the red herring!"

And it worked pretty well actually hahahaha, based on a lot of comments thus far.

Hm, yeah, not really much right now, but what I enjoyed for this is mostly plot, not fully the characters all the way. I prefer ones with extreme or actual gore and horror. This series was more on the subtle manipulative side, even with the sex.

...

Yes. I still have a type. wahahhaahha

ADDITIONAL INFO + Yandere Male Recommendations (AND SPOILERS FOR THE GAME):

YES, I played Variable Barricade a long time ago and I enjoyed it a lot. Actually, the picture was not Ichiya, it was the bad ending with the twin. I came for the pink-haired guy, Taiga. Reminded me most of my husband's infuriating demeanor with me before we officially dated and stuff. Literally. INFURIATING.

And what happened? Played the routes, both Taiga and Ichiya's. Found myself seeing the twin and doing the bad ending last. I was like "Shiz this guy's the one most like my husband ahhhhhhh". Not yandere, just a jerk, tbh, but it's more of the, ....uhhh. IDK It's hard to explain! But LITERALLY I FOUND MYSELF RELATING CRAZY TO THE BAD ENDING MOST THAN ANYTHING. CRAZYYY ahhhh

That smirk does things to me. LOLLLLL AHHAHAHAH

This was my banner image before, since when I see it, reminds of my husband and I. GAH, I relate more to bad endings than good ones sometimes tbh (or maybe all the time.... does that say something about myself? Yes it does, haha).

Also this is the scene Anon was talking about. If you like crying yanderes, here. For you all who love your pathetic crying men:

ALSO PEOPLE SAID THERE IS NO YANDERE IN THIS GAME.

ICHIYA IS YANDERE. He's an ENFJ YANDERE that is the "If you can't be with me, then let's die together." kind of vibes. It's been a while, can't remember, but yeah.

WDYM THERE IS NO YANDERE. I was shocked because I was just chillin' then I found that ending scene. So guys, yandere reccs for youuu alll. And this is a good game in general, liked it.

ALSO I LOVE THE SONG. Still listen to it. Just listened to it actually.

ALSO THE ART IS AMAZING. JUST LOOK AT IT. The mini endings were oddly satisfying. IDK I related to it a lot, not for the characters, but it just reminded me a bit of how my own personal love story went. Definitely not as dark, but still. My all-time favorite otome. LEGIT.

Other notes, I found the MC relatable at that time, and also the friends. I usually get annoyed with females. Not being sexist. But it's more of a lot of bland breads around. It's also why I always make sure the female OC's I release have substance in them, like all my characters.

Ok, I'm sorry if I'm wrong but will I refer it to you as "Lear" then? I don't know why I thought of Lurker, but yeah. If I'm mistaken, feel free to inform me or to ask for a name change, no worries. Thank you so much for asking me this, and being comfortable enough to ask :))

Anyways, I'll note down your name then as my first named Anon ever, "Lear." Thank you! God bless too :)) Literally exposed my excited self, but oh well.

Also I'm a naturally curious person, no worries, Lear. For Readers, don't be afraid to ask or something, as long you obey the RULES, like the usual proper human respect and decorum, then all is chill.

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