#anyway i hope u enjoy my garbage

[snowangeldotmp3]

i wanted her to look at me;

(or the one where robin can't stop staring at nancy, who can't stop staring at steve and his stupid hair)

(or, a prequel to the rebel robin: surviving the upside down au)

It starts with five words that Robin’s surprised didn’t leave her own mouth. “You’re an idiot, Steve Harrington.” Robin’s not sure she can survive the rest of the semester like this. Watching Nancy Wheeler, grinning and giggling and batting her lashes at the douchebag that is Steve Harrington.

[evereverest2]

Little Monster Q&A + author fun facts !!

hello new followers and fans of Little Monster. first of all, i just have to thank everyone for the crazy support ive been getting as of late. thank you everyone. every like, comment, and reblog just pushes me to keep writing, even when it feels like every word i write is garbage.

so i decided to make this little special! idk if anyone will be super interested, so ill put all the stuff under the cut, but i also wanted to add this little drawing i did of terzomega as like extra content. if you arent interested, thanks anyway and enjoy the art!

—

to everyone who stayed, i have no idea why you’re interested, but thanks lmfao. this shit will be long.

Questions

Is your most recent oneshot about the mirror related at all to Little Monster? (from @ofthemorningstars)

i'm glad you noticed that !! in The Mirror, i very purposefully left two hints at the end of the fic to indicate its connection to Little Monster, which was the taco ring reference and Terzo's use of "mostriciatto". to me, mostriciatto will always be the Little Monster version of terzomega. no matter when i finish that fic or if i write more fics after, i will never again use mostriciatto unless im purposefully writing these versions of terzomega. i havent seen anyone else use it (i hope they dont), so i like to imagine this can be forever my impact on terzomega fics lmao. anyway, the purpose of me leaving those references isnt necessarily to say, "this is a future scene of little monster" bc it isnt exactly that (while i have plans that line up with this oneshot, i cannot anticipate that everything will fit perfectly by the time we get there in the canon). the purpose of doing that was to show u cuties that yes, terzo and omega will eventually have a better relationship, and i will be extending this timeline into papa terzo era. just a fun little teaser for my more observant fans.

also, fun fact about how i came up with that pet name. i was writing the first part of Little Monster (that part is now titled Spilled Wine as featured on my Ao3) and i knew i wanted to give terzo an affinity for using pet names, but i didn't know quite which ones to use. i didn't want to be boring, so i googled some. i have no idea where, but i found mostriciatto, meaning, of course, "little monster." i had yet to even really start writing it, but i knew i wanted it to be DARK with a very unhinged omega, so i thought, perfect. ill talk a bit more about the writing of part one later on

2. How many parts do you currently anticipate writing? Do you have a set ending point, or will this perhaps be an ongoing project for the foreseeable future? (from @ofthemorningstars)

i have 12 major plot points (including the first five parts i have written) that loosely translate into parts. this could mean 12 parts, or it could be more depending on what i write. i kinda plan on expanding this to 18 (6 parts per “era” or “act” [you’ll see what i mean]) though i dont quite have a set ending yet, so really its up in the air. i am, however, planning on having a definitive ending, ergo not an endless project. from there there may be some oneshots in this universe, but they will have an ending.

3. In the first part of little monster you put a disclaimer with something along the lines of "if you're expecting comfort I'm sorry to disappoint". The angst is MWAH but do you like plan on giving Terzo like any sort of comfort or happiness?? (from anon)

before i begin rambling, here's your answer: there will be hope and good times as mentioned above, and you might have even picked up on that in part 5. i may have wrote a fucked up versions of terzomega but whats a good story without character growth?? i havent determined the direction of the ending, but rest assured, if it all burns down, they will hold each other close (for the minute it takes).

but also.... funny story about that disclaimer....

soo i wanted to write ghost fanfic to impress my friend who is a VERY avid member of this community. however, i failed to realize they DO NOT like angst without love and care and fluff, so after i showed it to them, buddy did not like it. i took that as a sign that maybe this shit was a little TOO dark.

but my god, i could not stop thinking about it, as the caption said, and i dont always feel that away about what i write. i had recently started to post semi often to tumblr, and i just thought. well, theres gotta be someone else as fucked up as me, and i posted that shit. that disclaimer was a result of taking my friends reaction seriously and realizing that i needed to make it VERY clear that this fic is NOT for everyone. there was a different og caption that was longer and more grave, but i cut it down for aesthetics bc little monster has already seen more success than i ever anticipated.

4. What is your favorite ghost album, and what song introduced you to ghost? (from anon) & Favorite ghost song (or songs) (from @ask-enso-ghoul)

my favorite album is Infestissumam!!! the vibes of the album are so fucking immaculate, even if terzo is my favorite papa.

of course, of course, the first song i ever heard from ghost was Mary on a Cross. it blew up when it did and i loved it. the second song that really made me start getting into ghsot was square hammer, which will secretly also be my favorite ghost song but ive heard it so many times i have to give it now to the future is a foreign land. some of my other fave songs are jigolo, respite, body and blood, faith, twenties, and year zero (there’s just so many)

i want to take a second to say my least favorite album though, which is opus eponymous, or as i call it, pope pussy. it’s ok. it’s just ok. mk. i’m not a fan of that sound. the best song on there is genesis. I FUCKING SAID IT—

5. how do you get into the zone of writing smut-? I’m trying to get into it but it sounds cheesy when I do, so do you do something specific? (from anon)

im gonna level with you. i have been writing for almost a decade, since i was 12, and the first thing i started writing was smut. sex has always been a HUGE creative force for my writing and art in general. as stupid as it sounds, writing smut to me is more than just that. its my art. its my greatest and most inspirational subject. i love being creative with it, bending it to the niches and intricacies of the duo im writing, just playing with it as a medium of expression, of storytelling, of how DEEP it can be.

that being said, one of the easiest ways to get into the zone of smut specifically is being horny ! you imagine your pairing doing some illicit bedroom activity and you pick them up liek dolls and smush their faces together ! let it be fun, and let it be yours. dont write it to please the kinks of your audience, write it to your own taste and enjoyment.

as far as it being cheesy, yeah, it will feel that way. the most important thing is to be confident with your language and don’t shy away from calling a dick a dick, a pussy a pussy, an ass an ass. it feels stupid, but it will read worse if you make up artsy names for them every other line. don’t be afraid to be descriptive either, because that’s what the people want to see, trust me.

apologies if that was unhelpful, ive just been writing smut so long i can hardly tell you how i do it. im jsut super passionate about it and it fuels me creatively….. can u tell lol

6. Favorite work you’ve ever done? (from anon)

so.... ive written many things and that depends. its definitely not anything ive posted on here.

i think my favorite "serious" work is a short story i wrote for a creative writing class, called Abel and Sally. it was an modern inversion of the bible story of abraham and sarah, with a really dark ending (i love to shit on catholicism)

the other work that comes to mind is the first story i wrote about my oc anson, called Anson's Prison. that is something i would potentially post on here, its pretty short but its a good one. its oc content, tho, so i doubt many ppl would be interested lel.

8. will you draw more drawing for your stories in the future? (from anon)

well. heres my thing with art.

ive been drawing as long as ive been writing. but im not an artist; i never learned ANYTHING beyond like drawing itself, i.e. i dont know how to shade, pick colors, do bgs, etc. (can u tell??? do u see that art up there???? can YOU TELL??) thus, i have a sort of love hate relationship with drawing, and i usually dont like my own stuff. i didnt pick up drawing as easy as i did writing and its not nearly as intuitive to me.

that being said, it is sometimes fun when the drawings turn out just right and i get super passionate about something i draw and i can create the image in my head. so if the mood strikes me, i probably will draw more terzomega stuff in the future.

but why do i need to?? feeds you all SO WELL with little monster stuff you dont need my shitty art lmfao

9. MILK OR CEREAL FIRST? (from anon)

cereal. bc the moment the milk hits that cereal u are on a speedy ass countdown to devour that shit before it gets soggy, and brother, u better eat quick.

Things I wanted to share

Little Monster was supposed to be a one shot

so, Little Monster started as one thing and turned to something else entirely. originally, i wrote the beginning of the first chapter (where they are flirting in the church) in about april of this year. in this version, they were supposed to already be in love, though hiding it, and terzo was not drunk at all, just teasing. i eventually scrapped it because i wasnt very passionate about it and got p bored. then, in july, i had the itch to write something dark, but none of my projects at the time had characters i could really write that with. i came back to that scrapped fic and i thought, damn, i could really fuck these guys up, and i did.

little monster immediately became more successful than i thought it would be, and that was only about 10 notes and a comment in. i was happy to leave it at that, but then, i just started writing part two on a whim. if you look at the og post in the comments, i mention that im writing a "follow up". thats bc even when writing part two, this was not going to be a series !! but then, as i kept writing, part two became so long i had to split it in half, meaning there were suddenly 3. by the time i posted part three, though, i was shocked at the sheer amount of attention i was getting. at the same time, part three ended in such a way that i knew this story needed to keep going, to give these two a resolution. now, little monster will be a full fledged story thanks to all the support ive received :3

2. im an english major

yeah, you got me, im a college student majoring in english creative writing. is it obvious? my penultimate goal is to one day be a published author. it’s crazy surreal to me how much people express to me how they enjoy my writing~~ i hope i can one day make my dream come true 🥰 the unfortunate part about this is i go back to college next week and im uncertain how that will affect my writing schedule :p i’ll stick to weekly uploads for little monster tho dw !!

3. this is the first time i’ve written fanfic in several years

when i first started writing it was frerard and peterick fanfics on wattpad in middle school (huge shoutout to the ones that know lmfao). i stopped writing those before hs and haven’t written fanfic since. i think it’s very funny that i have come full circle back to writing band fanfic, altho ghost ofc is way more intricate with its canon

4. I LOVE YOU GUYS

i know i’ve said it a dozen times already on this post, but god it’s crazy. it’s nuts !! i’ve already made a handful of super sweet mutuals who i appreciate with all my heart, and even if you’re just a lurker, I STILL APPRECIATE YOU. EVERY SINGLE NOTE MAKES ME SO HAPPY. EVERY COMMENT AND RB HAS ME BURSTING WITH JOY.

it is entirely thanks to you all that i write terzomega and ive become so passionate about it. if it weren’t for your support, i would probably still be writing my silly little stories that no one but me could possibly understand, rotting away and wondering if anyone would even like my writing. terzo and omega are such a unique pairing compared to what ive written before, and writing them is a really cool feeling. i truly love it, and i hope i can continue to feed this side of the fandom for a long time.

from the bottom of my heart and with all my writing soul, thank you. i want to keep writing for u guys, and i want to satiate ur dirty terzomega fantasies >:) this is such a sweet and inclusive fandom and im glad i’ve been welcomed in so quickly. i hope i can continue to grow my talent here :3

ok that’s it bye teehee

[hannyoontify]

'chan! chanchanchanchanchanchanchanchan' you chanted, running up the stairs after a quick hello to his parents. chan looked up from his phone as you ran into his room, out of breath.

'what's up?' he asked. he set down as his phone as you launched yourself into his bed and smiled up at him.

'nothing, i just missed you' you giggled breathlessly. your best friend rolled his eyes and pushed your face away.

'gross'

you giggled as you inched your way up towards him. 'hey there's nothing wrong with missing my best friend'

chan felt like he got punched in the gut when he heard the words 'best friend'. was that all he would ever be to you? he picked up his phone again and watched you from the corner of his eye as you found a random sock under his pillow and threw it off the bed with a look of disgust. you began scolding him about basic hygiene or something like that but he just watched your pretty lips as they formed words that he couldn't comprehend.

'save those pick-up lines for your future partner. it's gross if you use them on me' he said. you pouted but nonetheless put your head in his lap to watch him play subway surfers on his phone.

'why not? it's good practice,' you said. 'and you really need to start cleaning your room-'

chan smothered your face with a pillow. 'GET OUTTTTT' the sound of your muffled laughs makes his lips quirk up into a small smile. 'seriously, you're like the annoying sibling i never had'

you lift your head up and flash a particularly charming smile at him. 'oh but you know you love me'

i do, chan thought to himself. he has loved you, since the first day of fifth grade when you became his seat partner and when he asked to borrow a pen, you brought out an array of different colored pens and asked him 'what color?' with a bright smile.

he loved you in eighth grade, when you experienced your first breakup and you sobbed into his shoulder for hours while he held you. he always thought you could do better than that douchebag but never said anything because of how happy you looked.

chan loved you all throughout high school and your different phases. he was your rock, the one person who stayed by your side through thick and thin and kept you grounded. he was the one you consulted before doing something really stupid (like cutting off all ur hair the night before a really important interview) and he would talk you out of it.

and you loved him for it. but he would never know.

a/n : this took an angsty turn i was NOT expecting lmao i js kept writing until this happened hehe BUT!! my brain juices are NOT working and its getting rlly annoying. my mingyu and dokyeom google doc tabs are just marinating in the back of my browser and i feel so bad BUT I CAN'T THINK OF ANYTHING i'm almost done with mingyu's but i'm not satisfied with it whatsoever like i'm not posting that garbage until i fix it. anyway hope u guys enjoyed lol

[blackbatcass]

im so happy u turned ur anons back on they rlly thought they were baiting you, huh?

anyways! im sooo excited for the cass rebirth fic skdfewkd but in the meantime i DO wanna get into some arrowfam. ollie, roy, mia and connor just interest me so muchh but i havent read muc except for fics and even though i was supposed to follow my super specific reading order i wanna take a break from nw and the batfam and read something else.

like you said ga can be very healing!

anyways do you have a read list for me that includes all of them? thankss!

p.s nightwing vs green arrow was a question dc posted on their insta and the answers really surprised me! any insight on this?

LOVE YAAA

hey! <3333 tyyy i hope it lives up to expectation. LITERALLY reading ollie is so healing its good for the soul.

so this is like a comprehensive list of ollie comics, and this is a guide to everyone in the arrowfam. they’re super helpful if you want a broad overview

for my own personal recs, i think it's nice to start with green arrow: year one or green arrow stranded, to get a feel for his origin & time on the island. the hard traveling heroes (green lantern/green arrow) stories are also essential reading in that they basically established the modern version of ollie's personality and they're soo much fun, just beware of snowbirds lol.

from there green arrow vol 2 (1988) is the big one! pretty much Thee green arrow run, especially if you want to get to know ollie better. it's a lot of solid street-level ga stories in seattle, dinah's there, eddie fyers is there, and connor's introduced towards the end! if you're specifically interested in connor #102-137 was his original green arrow run. though word of caution that anything written after mike grell is a bit questionable.

if you're more interested in the 'arrowfamily' as a whole then you're looking for green arrow vol 3 (2001). it's 75 issues and a lot of fun. this is where ollie comes back to life, mia is introduced, ollie legalizes gay marriage, etc. it's pretty much just ollie hanging out with connor and mia and having some more street-level star city shenanigans, and i am very fond of it. that being said when judd winick takes over there is some questionable shit (you might want to just skip the arc with joanna pierce) but overall it's a fun time. roy shows up occasionally, dinah comes and goes. it's probably the best run to read if you want to get to know the arrowfam as a whole.

do not read green arrow/black canary unless you're desperate. it's bad. it's hilariously bad. do not trust anyone who tells you it's good. it is pretty harmless so if you just want to skim through for mia funny moments go ahead but...yeah it's trash.

post-new 52 there is not a lot unfortunately. a lot of it's garbage. the jeff lemire run is probably the most salvageable? and the rebirth one (volume 6) isn't as nauseating so that's also an option. but obviously you can read & enjoy whatever you want, maybe new52 ollie is your favorite ollie. i would say to read through some of this if you're interested in emiko but i can't really recommend it per se.

and that brings us to the current ga ongoing! you've probably heard us bitch about it a lot on here, but tbh it's been less bad & more mediocre. mediocre comics are just really frustrating to read through in real time. i might give it a try though, it has some nice moments even though it's not great, and williamson is leaving the title next month! chris condon is set to take over and has said the first arc is about street-level crime in star city, influenced by grell and o'neill. so i am VERY excited, it has the possibility to be peak. i think condon's run (issue 18) could be a great place to hop on!

so those are my green arrow recs! if you're more interested in roy, he usually features more in titans titles than ga titles so i have a separate list in my comic recs tag for him.

i couldn't find the ig post you were talking about? i have no clue how a fight between dick and ollie would go if that's the question. power scaling is not my forte by any means. i'm not sure how ollie's archery and dick's hand to hand fighting would match up. so i don't have a lot of insight on that sorry!

[ap0stle]

WIP questionnaire tag game

THANK U FOR THE TAG @astramachina

umm the wip in question is TMNTDT aka Tell Me Not to Do This aka teenage mutant ninja turtle...dookie time

What’s the first part of your WIP that you created?

oough that was back in like... 2016? 2014? and i started with the first chapter right away which ended up being the fourth chapter and then became Nothing At All because i have wrecked this thang beyond recognition <3

If your story was a TV show, what would the theme song/intro be?

definitely Burn a Church by Coma Cinema bc it's been in my mock-soundtrack playlist for years and fits the vibes really well :3 the playlist in question is kind of a mess and old as hell but i'll link that too just in case ^_^

What are your favorite characters that you made? Why?

curtis definitely, i think i get caught up on the details of everyone but he is the most wholly developed and also umm. very similar to me so i love him dearly. he is the worst.

What other pieces of media do you think your fanbase would share?

if you like weird indie movies about young mentally unwell people that may or may not be queer and/or on da spectrum... you will enjoy my garbage and such movies as I Am Not a Serial Killer, As You Are, Super Dark Times, etc. ALSO magnus archives fans maybe bc of the whole Mold Cult thing that is still under development

What has been your biggest struggle with your WIP?

settling on a format was and is still my number one struggle lol. i have switched between a book, comic, videogame, screenplay, website... i have like 50000 drafts scattered across different websites and applications and if this thing ever comes to life i think i will actually fucking ascend

Are there any animals in your story? Talk about them!

ssssssssssort of. there are a lot of dead animals. and fungi. and mold. there have been some minor pet ideas thrown around for the more. Safe Environment characters but for the time being no actual lovable creatures :/ maybe eventually!

How do your characters travel/get around?

Juno's car because mr. dumbass dumped his murder truck into a river ^_^

What part of your WIP are you working on right now?

....yes. in all seriousness i have so many different versions in different POVs and tenses it's a toss up as to what i work on and if it will even make it to the next round of editing LOL

What aspects (tropes, maybe?) will you think draw your audience in?

its not quite explicitly queer (in the latest version) but heavily HEAVILY implied and i feel like the stories that are sort of ambiguous about their queerness tend to draw more people in ?? or they're more popular anyway LOL. so trope: queerbaiting ????

deeply unwell man who has not slept properly in 600 years. the ladies love that shit

^ unreliable narrator ?

religious horror sort of?

bury your gays except. is he actually dead?? .....

What are your hopes for your WIP?

to settle on a fucking medium LMAO. i cannot for the life of me stick to one, or a point of view, OR a tense so um . makin a goddamn decision would probbaly make the writing process like 600 times easier

tagging UM. shaking my brain for writer mutuals ik ive tagged yall before but i cannot think rn so @hammity-hammer @aether-friskets @xxdrowninglessonsxx @deviantartidentitydisorder

anyway if anyone else wants do this just pretend u have been personally tagged ily THANK U AGAIN MITCH ♡♡♡

[liu-yu-xin]

This is really random but I don't know who else to ask so... can you give me romance cdrama recs pleek 😭 straight or yuri i dont mind either (no bl tho I don't like seeing men happy) and with a happy ending jebal juseyo 🤲 sawry I don't have any friend who watches cdramas to ask 😓😓 I hope you don't mind me asking this

Oh yay!! Of course i dont mind i love talking about this. (Also I dont like seeing men happy lmaoooo 😭😭😭 dw there are basically no real BL cdramas the govt doesnt allow it and post 2020 they dont even allow double male lead shows anymore.) Anyway i gotta preface this by saying i havent actually finished that many cdramas because most of them are dookie garbage and i am also a hater So i dont have many to recommend but here they are:

苍兰诀 (love between fairy and devil): this is a historical fantasy and pls ignore the corny english name it is the undisputed number one forever to ME. I loved this show so much it was such a dark horse bc no one thought it would be good but now its pretty much universally agreed (even begrudgingly for some) to be The fantasy romance cdrama of the past like 5 years

月光变奏曲 (moonlight): this is a modern cdrama and one of the first i watched. I think it was super cute and lighthearted but not many ppl have seen it bc it basically got no promotion and modern cdramas generally dont do nearly as well as historical/historical fantasy/mythology ones

墨雨云间 (the double): this is a historical cdrama and its really less about the romance than it is about the female leads revenge and this is the only cdrama i finished this year so far and i thought the storyline was pretty engaging

传闻中的陈芊芊 (the romance of tiger and rose): i watched this ages ago and i dont really rmr it that well but i do know that i finished it and it was pretty good

One that i finished but dont really recommend but a lot of ppl liked it is 星汉灿烂 (love like the galaxy) its a historical cdrama and pretty long like 60 episodes. i hated the male lead but liked the female lead so i finished it but did not enjoy it towards the end but u can give it a try if the male lead doesnt piss u off i imagine its quite good

One that i cant speak for yet is 永夜星河 (love game in eastern fantasy) which just finished airing and im in the middle of. Its a historical fantasy and has the same leads as moonlight and ive heard good things about it (at least the first half of it) but if u wanna get into something thats popping off rn this is it.

and as for yuri the govt also doesnt allow it but one that i can think of that was yuri in the source material and they did what they could is 风声 (the message) and a lot of ppl liked this but i actually couldnt get past 2 episodes bc its set in war time in 1941 and i just could not keep up with the plot. Due to being stupid. Wait actually im pretty sure this one has a really depressing ending so maybe not 😭

(Also btw kind of a plug but if u go to my main blog @wanghedi ive live blogged watching all of these 😁)

[crehador]

winter 2024 first impressions: gekkan mousou kagaku

IT'S A MAGICAL BOYS ANIME BUT FURRY LET'S FUCKING GO

every season i need at least one thing that's kind of garbage but in a fun way, it's enrichment for me. and this is it i'm so hype for this little show that already looks absolutely absurd

going in i was not aware of the furry factor at all and i am THRILLED to see it lmao it's clearly shaping up to be a series that doesn't take itself too seriously which is exactly what i love

didn't really know anything going in except that miyawaki chizuru is directing (she's previously worked on gintama and boueibu) and that has me hopeful that this'll be just as delightfully unhinged (which so far it absolutely is)

it's not like completely filling the boueibu/fairy ranmaru hole in my heart (will we ever have another boueibu and/or fairy ranmaru... well time will tell) but it's definitely fun in a similar way. the transformations are not nearly as horny as the fairy ranmaru ones (but that could be said about any transformation scene ever, fairy ranmau u are my one and only) but the fact that they go full furry is just. incredible to me

delighted to heart yumoto's voice actor here... makes me miss boueibu all the more tho. shiraimu is also listed on the cast as the long sick dog (the borzoi) so i'm kind of expecting some sort of thing where like. the humans all go furry in their transformations and the dog ends up transforming into a human?? maybe??? would be hilarious

anyway

tl;dr great fun so far i wouldn't recommend it to anyone except those who can accept/enjoy anything (esp boueibu and fairy ranmaru enjoyers, pspsspss you will like this)

[sinelanguage]

ermmm 39 with usopp and zoro :0 ? perhaps some water7 with 45 if u so wish

Zoro doesn’t avoid things. 

Every problem he encounters he faces directly, even if it could send him to an early grave. It’s how problems should be tackled; promptly, efficiently, right in their face. Zoro will work at it until the problem breaks Zoro or Zoro breaks the problem. It’s always the latter in the end. He already told Luffy he’d never lose again, and he’s kept to his damn word. 

He’s not going to lose to anything, he’ll take on any fight he needs to. 

And he doesn’t avoid things. 

Hanging out in the Crow’s Nest isn’t avoiding anything. 

It’s the opposite of avoiding things, actually. He’s getting directly accustomed to the brand new ship that Franky made, with all its bells and whistles. It’s no Merry, nothing will ever be the Merry, but he has to admit the attention to detail impressives him. Franky built him the Crow’s Nest specifically, including his own weights and everything. It’s like the perfect ship for the crew, down to every last detail. 

It’s so detailed that it’s no surprise that the crew sticks to their own nooks and crannies of the ship instead of interacting with each other. It’s only natural. Everyone else is doing it; Chopper’s spent the last two days fawning over his new infirmary, the cook’s cooked up several feasts in his too-nice kitchen, and Robin’s spent considerably too long in the library reading who knows what.

Zoro cowering in the Crow’s Nest is normal. Franky made this place for him, just like he made the rest of the crew their own luxuries. He’d be stupid not to enjoy it. 

After his final set of one thousand with Franky’s brand new weights, Zoro sets them down and stares out at the horizon. The ocean’s calm, deceptively so, only a light breeze raising the Sunny’s sails. It’ll be another day or two before they find another adventure, and he hopes that the rest of the crew is enjoying the alcoves as much as Zoro is. 

He’s so caught up in looking for a threat on the horizon that he misses the creak of the door as it opens. 

“Hey, shithead,” says a familiar, grating voice. “Are you going to skip lunch for your workouts? That’s stupid, you know. If you don’t get protein, none of that even matters–”

“I don’t care,” Zoro interrupts. He doesn’t need the cook to lecture him. “I don’t need your shit food for my routine. I can handle this myself.”

“This is handling yourself, huh?”

Zoro sniffs, trying to ignore the enticing smell of freshly seared meat. “Uh-huh. Didn’t ask for delivery. I’m not going to give you a tip.”

“Like I’d want your shit tip,” Sanji answers, unceremoniously dropping a plate of what smells like the most enticing seared fish Zoro’s ever smelt in his entire life. “Anyway, I don’t care. I had extra fish, I figured I’d give it to the closest garbage disposal on board.”

The fish does smell good. “Fine,” Zoro says. “I’ll eat your shit food. Now fuck off.”

Sanji closes the door behind him, the lock clicking shut. “No,” he says. “I don’t feel like it. I want a smoke, and the view’s nice from up here. Now eat up before it gets cold.”

He doesn’t want to listen to the cook’s orders, but, well. The fish does smell good, and he’s not going to resist that smell forever. He needs the protein, or whatever. 

Shoving a handful of food into his mouth, he ignores the cook’s annoyed scoff at talks at him with his mouth open. “So, what? You doing delivery service now? Should’ve brought me onigiri instead of fish if you knew what you were doing.”

“I only gave this to you because I had extra,” Sanji says. “Usopp caught a shitload of fish, more than we could even store in the brand new aquarium.”

Oh, right. That makes sense; the Sunny’s equipped for everyone, including Usopp. 

Zoro frowns, chewing slowly. He didn’t want to think about Usopp.

“Really, it’s impressive how much fish he caught while you were up here napping,” Sanji continues. Zoro clearly wasn’t napping, but whatever. “Enough to fill up the aquarium and Luffy’s stomach. Impressive feat, really.”

It is, but he doesn’t want to comment on it. 

“I should tell him you snarfed up his damn fish, he’d love that,” the cook continues. He pauses, blowing out a puff of smoke that covers his face. “He thinks you’ve been avoiding him.”

And there it is. This is why the cook’s really here, to interrogate him. It’s not like he expected anything other than an ulterior motive from him, but he didn’t think it’d be about Usopp. 

“I’m not avoiding him,” Zoro says. “I just haven’t…”

He’s just purposefully not running into Usopp. 

It’s not that he’s scared of Usopp. Usopp’s not a threat, nor is he a loose cannon. Not anymore, that is. They both know where they stand; Zoro’s made his point, and Usopp’s passed his test. They’re all fine, in theory. It’s just… 

It’s just delicate. 

Delicate is something that Zoro doesn’t know how to handle without breaking. Luffy rightfully welcomed him back on the crew after he apologized, and he seemed to be completely dedicated to the crew with his own damn baggage sorted, but it doesn’t mean Usopp wants anything to do with him. 

Zoro trusts him on the crew, but there’s an underlying question Zoro doesn’t have the answer to. 

Does Usopp trust him?

The answer doesn’t really matter. He’s part of the crew, but that doesn’t mean Usopp has to like him specifically. 

“I’m not avoiding him,” Zoro says. “He hasn’t talked to me, either.”

Sanji scoffs. 

“If the idiot wanted to talk to me, he would,” Zoro continues. “But he doesn’t. So it’s fine. He’ll just catch you one thousand fish or whatever the hell it is he does.”

Sanji taps his fingers on his thigh, clearly not impressed. Zoro wants to wipe the expression off his face, but infuriatingly, Sanji doesn’t give him the damn chance. 

“Whatever it is he does, huh?”

Like Zoro knows what that’s supposed to imply. 

“Yeah, whatever it is that he does,” he says. 

There’s one more critical look, full of context Sanji understands but Zoro doesn’t. It’s infuriating, and it reminds him of Sanji’s own reaction to Luffy and Usopp’s fight back at Water 7. He picked up on shit that Zoro missed, but he wouldn’t explain himself, not even now. 

“Maybe you’d know whatever it is he does if you spent some time on the deck instead of hunkering down up here,” Sanji says. “I took you for a lot of things, but I never took you for a damn coward.”

Zoro stiffens, shoving another fish into his mouth. “I’m not a damn coward,” he says with food still in his mouth, just to annoy the cook. “What the hell is your problem, anyway? Come here to give me delivery, or did you come here to give me a lecture?”

“Neither,” Sanij corrects, dusting off his pants. “I came here to deal with my leftover problem.”

He picks up the last fish from the plate, and unceremoniously shoves it in Zoro’s mouth. 

“Mfm,” Zoro protests, trying to chew on an entire fish. 

“Uh-huh. Great, good to know you’ll talk to Usopp sometime this century,” Sanij says. He picks up his plate, shoves it under his arm, and turns around to the Crow’s Nest’s exit. “I expect you to figure it out by the next island, moron.”

“Mfmf,” Zoro says between bites of fish. 

Sanji scoffs. 

Zoro swallows his fish whole. “Nothing to figure out,” he says, but by the time the words are out, Sanji’s gone. 

With a frustrated groan, Zoro knocks his head into the glass of the Crow’s Nest. He’s not avoiding anything; Usopp’s avoiding him. Things are fine, they’ll continue to be fine, and all Zoro needs to worry about is getting stronger and training like always. It doesn’t matter if that crew particularly likes him. Not really. That’s totally tangential to his problem. 

Scrubbing at his mouth, Zoro stares off at the horizon. He’s sure he can get another set in, and another after the sun sets. By that time, Usopp may be asleep already. 

He’s not avoiding anything. He’s not. He’s just being practical.  And if his sets last long into the night, until he’s sure Usopp’s asleep, well. That’s just a fucking coincidence, that’s all.

[im-immortal]

yikes, ok, SO

i would first and foremost like to thank you with complete sincerity for RUINING my week. istg i started in for a penny, in for a pound on like, FRIDAY, and demolished all 480k words like a dumpster-diving raccoon on garbage night.

let me tell you, when i finished thirsty and realized that the next installment wasn't a sequel, i almost threw up. that being said, every gd word of hot girl summer made the whole thing so much more fun and painful and horrible and amazing, sooo... who am i to complain?

ik it's been about a month since you updated—and a few scattered author's notes might suggest i could have to wait even longer—but i want u to know that i will be screaming, crying, throwing up while waiting for your next chapter😭(no rush tho 👀)

anyway, desperation aside, i noticed you use songs as inspiration a lot and i figured i'd share a few that have been running through my mind since i started reading:

-Alone- Heart (ik u got a thing for those 80s jams so LISTEN OK it's so them "til now, i always got by on my own/ i never really cared until i met you/ and now it chills me to the bone/ how do i get you alone?" pls i swear bethyl has ruined so many songs for me but ESPECIALLY this one, i mean come onnn)

-Wildest Dreams- Taylor Swift (don't lie to me, maybe daryl isn't a swiftie but i can tell you might be, on the DL. the whole chorus is so this fic, what with the romance they know has to end, desperately creating memories so the other won't forget them. and tell me this line—"someday when you leave me/ i bet these memories/ follow you around"—isn't SO bethyl. like, do the words "you're gonna miss me so bad when i'm gone, daryl dixon" mean anything to u??

anyways, that about sums it up. sorry for the massive ask, except not really because i need to let this all out somewhere, and seeing how it's all ur fault...

LMAO hope all is well and happy writing booface xoxo 😘

Well hot damn. I’m not gonna lie, I panicked for a second when I read the first line of this ask, and then it made me smile like a crazy person 😂

I deeply apologize for ruining your week (kinda) and also HOLY HELL, you read all that in a weekend??? Are you okay????

I actually am genuinely sorry HGS wasn’t a direct sequel, but I’m glad you’re still enjoying it 😅 as far as an update goes, I have like half of the next chapter written, but I’ve been having some health issues this month that put me into a bit of a mental slump. It won’t be much longer before I continue tho.

Omg thank you for the song recs!!! Yes, I am a slut for the 80s songs (they give me so many vibes for this series), and yes, you are correct about me being a low key Swiftie (cruel summer has become like my anthem for the whole ifap series, can’t wait for you to see where it ends up being included.)

This ask made my whole day so thank you thank you thank you!!!! 🥰💞

(ps: “booface”? I see what you did there 👀😂😂)

[messenger-of-stupidity]

Upon meeting Midnight's voice actor today (she's so nice omg) and seeing their interactions with their partner, Jason Liebrecht (Dabi's VA, and honestly can u imagine being a fly on the wall at their home when they recorded the scene where Dabi kills Midnight? Oml) they are one of my OTPs. (I really hope they don't ever look at Tumblr posts.)

Jason said some of lines Midnight might say in Dabi's voice. I needed to touch some grass god damn.

It's also so perfect to be able to cosplay a character that doesn't really say anything when you have social anxiety. Like I'm not being anxious and/or rude, I'm being Canon.

Anyways I'm cosplaying Toge Inumaki.

It would be fun to post pictures of my cosplay but internet privacy. And I'm not about to post pictures of other cosplayers without their permission either. But instead have a photo from the mha panel today. (I took videos too, but my voice is present so no for you. I also have voice recordings but they're mine. I might pist them later idk)

(Also for anyone who originally followed me for Dabi x reader content, I'm gonna start it back up after I watch season 6. Gonna need to hug my new dabi body pillow when I watch it. Yours truly gonna cry. I'll still be posting redacted stuff, but mha will make a slow mixed in comeback.)

(Don't mind the wig of the person in front of me. Instead enjoy the bad photo quality of Jason Liebrecht. My hands were shaking because he kept alternating in and out of the Dabi voice and your nb peice of garbage was simping.)

[sunsetshifting]

Hey! tell us more about yourself id like to get to know u :DD

Sure thing! I'll do my best, anyway!~ (Under the cut bc I ramble a bit haha!)

So, the basics! My screen name is 'Sunny', my pronouns are he/they, and I'm 20 years old! I just recently had my 20th birthday (like 2 months ago), so I'm also an Aries!

I'm bisexual, non-binary, and polyamorous (or at least open to the idea of it!)

(Here is the picrew link) I look a little something like this! Although my hair irl is quite different, as the sides and back of my head are shaved short (sort of like a mohawk, I guess?) I'm also 5'5.~

.

I have quite a few hobbies, including drawing, scripting (for DRs/shifting in general), videogames, and occasionally writing super purposefully garbage fanfic (it's so fun to watch my friends' horrified reactions at the awful crackfics I write.)

I enjoy a good number of medias, anything from itch.io dating sims (I have tons of recommendations on that front) to Fallout: New Vegas. I really favor RPG games, though! Undertale, Cattails, Fallout, Sun Haven, Rune Factory, all that good stuff. I'm also a pretty big fan of pop punk and rock music <3

I really love animals, and have 4 cats (Crybaby, Karkat, Steven, and Padparadscha) and 2 dogs (Pascha and Pixel.) I also really love the snakes around my house (little garden snakes), but those aren't technically my pets, haha!

I tend to spend my time on discord, chatting w/ friends about shifting, games, pretty much anything that comes to mind. When I'm not doing that, though, I tend to be reading, sketching, or napping.

I've currently got 39 desired reality scripts (Might make a post abt those later!), spanning a variety of medias that I enjoy. As said before, I've only mini-shifted (and not to a DR), so I haven't yet experienced these for myself, but I'm super excited to!

My primary DRs atm are Obey Me, Spiderverse, and my Comfort Waiting Room. (I've got 3 different WR scripts, so I like to differentiate them~)

I hope that can suffice for the moment? Whenever someone asks me to talk about myself, I always draw a blank, like I've forgotten every hobby I've ever had haha

<3 Happy Shifting! <3

[alwaysbethewest]

I have very similar feelings seeing people get engaged or married now that I’m in my 30s. sometimes even watching grogu and din together makes me lonely lmao. unfortunately I have no advice or anything insightful to say, just hope we all end up with fulfilling lives and loves in whatever iteration occurs but here is another recipe to try if you need more comfort pasta, it’s one of my favorites!! bonus that it tastes even better as leftovers imo

https://www.faithwillinger.com/recipes/garbage-pail-pasta

I use kalamatas bc idk where to get gaeta olives and I use way more than the recipe because I love olives. and increase the parsley. also recommend golden raisins instead of purple. hope u enjoy and hope you get what makes you happy 💕

This is so kind, thank you ❤️ (TW for mention of a pregnancy loss—not my own—under the cut)

I went through a phase of real baby fever when I was younger, and it's waned a lot over the years but still pops up again every now and then. But at a certain point a few years ago, for various reasons, I came to the decision/realization that I most likely won't have kids and it was remarkable to me how much processing that was a kind of grieving. Like, somehow I hadn't expected it to feel like that. And it is a strange thing to see other people living out something that you have let go of for yourself—it can be hard to wrap your brain around it, I think. It sometimes feels unfair, even if those feelings aren't justified. But what's your path is yours and what's their path is theirs and it is what it is.

Anyway. One of my siblings was expecting a baby this year and the pregnancy had to be terminated for medical reasons, and I was surprised all over again by how much I cried my fucking heart out over it. The pain of that family loss is still fresh, and twice now since then I've seen a happy pregnancy announcement and immediately spiraled into really rough waters—even though the rational part of my brain is of course happy for them and I want all good healthy things for them. It just. Is hard to find the joy through the grief and jealousy. And that's how it is right now.

(And that's just baby-related, that's not even touching on the loneliness of singledom 🙃 I'm sorry you're feeling that way too. I appreciate this message so much and I hope you find your happiness too 🥰 Feel free to DM me if you ever want to chat)

[raven]

this is only somewhat related i guess but i had a similar revelation about writing something original a while ago. i wrote some fanfiction online and i got really attached to the story, and at some point i realized the plot is far removed enough from the og source material that i could literally just change character names and make small tweaks and it could be just a regular book. currently working on editing/getting it published atm and it’s going well so!! :]

(also, while i agree that fanfic is not inherently made for serious critique/meaning and it shouldn’t be treated as such, i view writing fic almost the same as regular writing, just in a different context and working off another piece of media, and i’ve read a lot of fics that at leasts i consider to be genuinely good and well crafted. some of the most talented writers i know personally started out writing fanfic or *still* write it, so i don’t know if treating the entire concept of fanfic like it can’t be art at all is fair. but of course that’s just personal opinion!! i don’t think it matters much lmao but i just respectfully disagree w that part)

I hope that goes well! i know a lot of people dont like it when fanfics get published and i agree on most levels but ive read at least one (as a kid, so maybe im just remembering it as better than it was, but whatevr) where i was like the only thing about this that is somewhat similar to the source material is the character dynamics and obviously the names, like what are you doing just make it completely your own.. ok heres the thing. published r*ylo (or any star wars fanfic lol) is like garbage and trash and already overdone. but i would read, like, a published sasunaru fanfic. havent even seen/read naruto but i would read it. its just the literal nerve of publishing straight fanfiction. (the finnpoe one that people made fun of a few months ago also looked bad but everything star wars is kind of straight to me, and also bad) sorry if what you're writing is straight and especially if it's star wars but if it is do keep these words in mind.

anyways. i think it can be a useful tool in practicing writing (although there are some bad habits that are very prevalent in fanfiction) Also btw sorry the edible just hit so this migjt be less coherent. And ive read some that i enjoyed, some that were well written, etc, but its just. theres something to me that is just kind of . Self centered? and i say this as someone who has read fanfic recently like the vibes i get from the authors and myself as a reader. it's just like... Things You Like. its Stuff You Enjoy. its kind of like . its so self indulgent. (even if its like well it can be used to explore mature themes etc etc Listen on some level You Like It and its not because of its social commentary! or whatever.) Maybe i spoke too quickly on saying its "not art" but i. Well. Hm. i cannot vocalize this right now im sorry. Anyways. if u want to continue this conversation do not be afraid to dm me, these posts are just getting long and probably annoying and the edible did hit right in the middle so i didnt give it all of my best work. im like super high right now sorry bye

[losingmymindtonight]

been on a for-your-own-good imposed exile from my phone & social media since Friday, so what’s a gal gonna do except eat pizza, reread The Inheritance Cycle, and finish old fic drafts?

I humbly present: Peter can’t sleep, but Tony’s a father now, and he’s got a few tricks up his sleeve.

--

Peter was okay.

He was. That wasn’t even him being self-sacrificing (like May thought) or deferring some kind of PTSD (like Tony thought) or anything. Most of the time, he was totally, completely, undeniably okay.

As a general rule, he just didn’t think about Thanos. He was too busy for that, with planning for his school’s Europe trip and patrolling and learning how to be a big brother to Morgan and resettling a whole apartment with May and rediscovering the absolute thrill of being alive along with the other fifty percent.

He had a good life, and considering everything that had happened, he was so, so lucky.

So, Peter was okay. Despite what Tony and May seemed to think.

He only ever had problems when the sun fell.

Vigilante by day, anxious wreck by night, he thought, more than a little bitter.

There was a bone-aching frustration that came with insomnia. He couldn’t sleep, but he was tired. God, he was so, so tired. His eyelids creaked, his face was tight and worn. Every inch of him was screaming for rest.

And yet, well, here he was: awake, staring at the ceiling, mind swirling down the inescapable drain of death throes and battle heat and the memory of his DNA vibrating apart.

He clenched his fists, then slowly pried them apart. His wrists hurt, yet his webshooters were comfortingly cool on his bare skin.

“Mister Parker,” F.R.I.D.A.Y. suddenly said, and Peter still jumped despite the fact her volume had been lowered and pitched into her softer night mode. “I apologize for the intrusion, but per my protocols, I am to alert Boss if you or Morgan are awake for longer than thirty minutes from the hours of 11:00 pm to 6:00 am. I thought it was only fair to warn you that he is en route to your bedroom and you should be prepared for his arrival.”

There was a time when an alert like that would’ve filled him with annoyance. A time when he would’ve met Tony at the door with a sharp reminder of, I’m almost an adult, I can take care of myself, on his tongue. Now, though, he just felt a dull splash of surprise.

“Mister Stark has rules for if I’m awake?” He asked the ceiling, blinking slowly at the smooth molding. It was different than the popcorn texture in his apartment. Probably easier to deal with when it came to painting.

As if on cue, his door swung open. A soft, yellowish bar of light flashed over his sheets and then collapsed in on itself with a distant click. Huh. So Tony thought that this needed to be a private conversation. 

“It’s called the Cradle Protocol,” Tony offered, and despite the fact that Peter hadn’t actually looked in his direction yet, he could hear the man’s smile in the warmth of the words, like curling into a fireside on a winter’s day. “You know, in case you were wondering.”

“I wasn’t.”

“Oh? Thought you spent most of your life wondering about pretty much everything.” His bedframe creaked as Tony settled down near his hip, and suddenly Peter didn’t have much of a choice but to stare up at the man, taking in the burn scars on his face and the gray in his hair and the quiet love in his eyes. “That’s what kids are best at.”

“I’m not really a kid anymore,” he whispered, but not a single inch of the words felt defiant. God, he wanted to be a kid again. He looked back on the moments he’d spent racing to adulthood and wanted to cry. Wanted desperately to hit rewind on all of it.

“All of us are kids, in the end,” Tony said, like it was the easiest thing in the world. “And you’ll be my kid forever. Sorry. No exchanges or returns on that policy. It is how it is.”

Tony’s thumb brushed soothingly over his cheek as he spoke, and the contact was rough and calloused and so intensely familiar that Peter let his eyes squeeze shut against it, swallowing hard.

“I don’t want to exchange it,” he whispered, and somehow he felt a little ashamed to admit it. Like he was rearing up against the order of things. Or, like he was admitting the truth in a space where untruths were expected.

There was a pause. Peter blinked his eyes open again, and saw that Tony’s gaze had drifted away from him. He was looking up at the headboard, soft curves of sadness mellowing his face.

Finally, he breathed, eyes tracing their way back to Peter’s own, gentle yet intense.

“Why aren’t you asleep, Peter?”

It was a redundant thing to ask, and both of them knew it. There wasn’t a person in the world who couldn’t guess the why of that question. There were probably a million different people all around the world staring up at a million different ceilings, all cold-eyed and shivering because of the same goddamn reason.

“I don’t know,” he lied.

Was it still lying if everyone knew that what you were going to say was a lie before it even left your mouth?

Tony just nodded, like those three words had told him everything that he’d needed to know. For all Peter could figure, maybe they had.

“Alright.” Tony patted his thigh through the blankets, then stood. “C’mon. Get up.”

It probably said a lot about him, or maybe more about his relationship with Tony, that he was already climbing out of bed even as he muttered a halfhearted, “where’re we going?”

“On a mission,” Tony said, gently tugging one of Peter’s oldest and softest hoodies out of his closet and pushing it against his chest. “Put this on.”

He did as he was told, tottering lazily into the hallway, too exhausted to do anything but follow.

“What’s the mission?”

Tony glanced back just long enough for Peter to see the corner of his mouth quirk up. “I need to put my baby to sleep.”

If he hadn’t been so goddamn tired, he would’ve picked up on the wryness in Tony’s voice. As it was, he blinked hard, brain whirring against the fogginess.

“‘S Morgan awake?”

The question startled a bark of laughter out of Tony. “God, Pete. I can’t believe you’re even managing to walk in a straight line right now.”

They were at the front door, now, and Tony snatched the car keys off of their hook in the entryway and ushered him into the cool night air. Cricket chirps swelled all around them. Peter let his eyes drift shut at the sound, then smiled when he felt Tony snag the edge of his sleeve, gently guiding him over the gravel.

“Ought to get this paved, huh?” Tony muttered, almost to himself, but Peter let the words fall over him anyway. “Would make life a hell of a lot easier when we got those summer monsoons. Plus, less of a tripping hazards for the kiddos, especially when they’re half asleep.”

“‘M awake,” he protested.

“I know,” Tony said, almost under his breath. “I’m working on it.”

Peter heard a beep as one of the cars unlocked, and he forced his eyes back open. They were standing in front of Tony and Pepper’s minivan, something which Peter still couldn’t quite wrap his head around. Tony Stark owned a minivan. Sure, it was a nice minivan, with leather seats and F.R.I.D.A.Y. installed and parking sensors, but it was still a minivan.

“C’mon,” Tony muttered, using the hand that wasn’t braced against Peter’s back to pull open the passenger’s side door. “Slide in.”

He let Tony manhandle him into the seat, even though he could’ve easily done it on his own. The exhaustion had stripped his stubbornness away. The only thing left was a yearning urge to be protected, cradled, loved.

It was good, he supposed, that those three roles seemed to be Tony’s favorites to fulfill.

Tony got into the driver’s seat, then double-checked Peter’s seatbelt twice before starting the car. He cracked the back windows, and the cricket chirps and nature swell mixed hypnotically with the buzz and hum of the engine. Peter closed his eyes and took a deep breath, turning his face in Tony’s direction when he felt the man’s eyes on him.

“You’re supposed to be looking where you’re drivin’,” he murmured, knowing that his smile was all drowsy and lopsided. He could feel them moving, though, so he wasn’t wrong.

“Nobody’s out this late.”

“Still need to stay on the road.”

“Oh, hush. I’ll take no driving smack from the child with a learner’s permit.”

He yawned. “Passed the test.”

“You sure did,” Tony murmured, pride warming the words. “I’ve got that picture that May took after hanging in my office.”

“I know.” A shard of longing pierced his chest. “Felt normal that day. Jus’ for a bit.”

He opened his eyes just in time to see guilt cascade over Tony’s face. Whoops. He really hasn’t meant to make his mentor sad. He was just loopy from all the sleepless nights, wading through the detachment weighing in his head. It was hard to stay conscious and keep his filter all at once.

“I’m so sorry, Peter,” Tony said, hands gripping the wheel so tight that his knuckles flashed white under the occasional streetlamp. “I wish I could take it all away.”

Peter just blinked. God, he was tired. His brain ached with it.

“You can’t.”

And Tony couldn’t. Peter knew that. Iron Man could do a lot of things, even survive the constriction of space, but he couldn’t void memories. Nobody could.

“No,” Tony admitted, and even through the fuzziness in his head, Peter found the wherewithal to be surprised, “but I can be here.”

Peter let his eyes drift shut again. Somehow, that was all the fixing that he needed Tony to do. I can be here.

That was it, wasn’t it? It was why the memories of Thanos rung so clear at night and pitched silent during the day. Because Peter hadn’t really been afraid of dying during the battles. He’d been terrified, horrified, by the thought of being left alone.

And at night, in his bedroom, walls and doors and locks between Tony or May or anybody else who would stave off the quiet, that fear was so much easier to taste.

He was so, so afraid that at the end of it all, he’d been irreversibly alone.

“Can you talk to me?” He whispered.

He just wanted words. Something substantive in the nothingness of night. And Tony was only ever speechless when there was something to be afraid of.

He’d... He’d been silent when Peter had died. Had been silent after he’d done the Snap, too. The look on the man’s face, the lack of speech in the haze, had rung in Peter’s nightmares ever since.

He could hear the roughness in Tony’s voice when he responded, and Peter couldn’t help but wonder if he was thinking about his silence on Titan, too. If he even remembered the stillness from the Compound’s dust.

“Of course, buddy.”

And he did. He talked about Rhodey and college and the first time he met Happy. Peter found himself drifting in and out as he rambled, although he never seemed to fully wrap his hand around true sleep. He’d nearly get there, Tony’s words fading into something he couldn’t quite comprehend, and then he’d recognize the shift and jolt himself out of it.

Somehow, it was even more frustrating than what he’d been doing before. At least then, he’d known he wasn’t going to get any sleep. Here, it kept dangling in front of him. And to make it worse, every aborted attempt at sleep felt like a failure. Like he’d screwed it all up, despite all the effort Tony was putting into helping him.

“Sorry,” Peter suddenly muttered, blinking away his most recent near-rest. Tony fell silent. “Sorry, sorry.”

“Shh, Pete,” Tony soothed, right hand abandoning the steering wheel and settling on his arm. “It’s not your fault. We’ll get there.”

“‘M trying.”

“I know you are. You’re doing great.”

For a breath, Tony just rubbed Peter’s arm, breath and nature filling the car.

“I used to do this for Morgan, you know,” he finally said, voice low. “Learned it within the first month. Think I must’ve put a thousand miles on the car, driving around just for some precious minutes of peace.”

“Ben used to drive me around when I was little,” Peter mumbled, twisting until he found a comfortable position: draped over the center console, head just inches away from Tony’s elbow. The console was leather and padded, which made it a surprisingly good pillow. Plus, he was close enough to pick up the steady thrumming of Tony’s heartbeat. “I didn’t like sleeping after my parents died. Car always worked, though. Dunno why.”

Tony’s hand settled on the top of his head, and a swoosh of comfort whisked from that one point all the way down to his toes. “It’s the vibrations from the engine. Low frequencies make us tired. It mimics the sensation of being rocked to sleep.”

He smiled. Trust Mister Stark to turn anything into a physics lesson. “‘S science,” he muttered.

Tony’s thumb swiped over his temple. “It’s science,” he repeated. “Do you want another story?”

Hmm. Yes. And he wanted Tony’s hand to stay right there, too. The tips of his fingers kept brushing over the nape of his neck, and the pattern was nice. Slow. The kind of monotony that was so easy to get lost in.

“Mm.”

“How about a special one?”

“Mm.”

“Well, since you asked so nicely,” Tony said, laughter in the words. He sounded pleased, though. Peter was too busy falling asleep to figure out why. “Y’know, I never went to Queens much when I was a kid. Howard wasn’t a big fan. And then I didn’t have much of a reason to go once I was an adult. Everything I needed was in Manhattan or Malibu. Point is: imagine how surprised I was when a web-slinging vigilante actually forced me out there…”

Peter drifted off long before he could recognize that the story was about him.

--

Peter half-surfaced to the quiet thud of a car door opening, and the crunch of shoes on gravel.

It wasn’t the usual way he woke up. He’d gotten used to jolting into consciousness, sweat slicking his trembling limbs and damp sheets snarling all around him. It was a violent thing, full of heartbeat and rib-ache.

But this was soft. Warm. Safe hands slid under the back of his neck, his seat tilting back until he was lying almost completely flat. On instinct, his eyes flickered open, and he grinned sleepily at Tony, who shushed him in a barely-there murmur.

“Nice and easy, Pete,” Tony said, voice warm and safe and already blurring. “Now be a good boy and go back to sleep.”

And for once in Peter’s life, it was as simple as that.

[fvaleraye]

Flat color commission for @carnation-damnation ! They wanted an Uncle Spamton scenario where him and Kris were bonding over Animal Crossing, and I loved it very much ;w; They told Spamton to bury some bells in a glowing hole, and he’s now seeing the results

Kris is they/them and don’t tag as ship or I’m eating your kneecaps

If you would also like a commission like this, here’s my prices!

[hessafeelsfordayss]

Unrequited - Stiles x Reader (Part 1 of 3)

Pairing: Stiles Stilinski x Reader

Summary: You get the courage to finally tell Stiles about your feelings for him.

Author's Note: Hey guys! It's been so long since I've written or posted anything on here, or on any other site for that matter, so I apologize if my writing is a little rusty right now. I'm just now getting back into writing, so try not to judge too harshly... hopefully the more practice I have the better the stories will be! Notes, feedback, constructive critism, etc. are always welcome, all I ask is that you please be respectful. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy! ❤

Today was the day you would finally do it.

Today was the day that you would finally tell him how you feel.

Nervous butterflies erupt in your stomach as you think of what you're going to say.

How will he react?

Will he return your feelings?

You don't know what possessed you to want to tell him today of all days, especially after all the times you've held the truth from him, you're just happy that you finally gained the courage to do it. Something you honestly never saw happening.

A loud horn blares, effectively bringing you out of your thoughts.

You look out the window and see Stiles sitting in Roscoe, waving excitedly at you.

Waving back you send him a smile, holding up a finger to indicate that you are on your way down and will be there in a minute.

You grabbed your School bag, before running down the stairs and hugging your parents goodbye. You wish them a good day and tell them you love them before running out the door.

"Hey, what's got you in such a good mood?" Stiles teases while watching you climb into his passenger seat.

You roll your eyes playfully before shutting the door and leaning over to hug him.

He always smells so good. Like a perfect mixture of men's cologne and mint.

"No particular reason. Just have a feeling that today is going to be a good day."

Stiles chuckles and nods before setting the jeep in reverse and pulling out of your driveway.

"Yeah? Not for me. I have a test in Trigonometry today, which I'm so looking forward to."

You giggle at his sarcasm, placing your hand on his shoulder.

"You're gonna do great, Sti. You're one of the smartest people I know."

He shoots you a playful look, "Yeah, well that doesn't give me much confidence, considering you know five people at most, myself included."

A scorned look crosses your features before a scoff of faux disbelief leaves your parted lips.

"Yeah, well you should be lucky to be one of those five people. I'm amazing." You flip your hair dramatically, Stiles glancing at you out of the corner of his eye with a small smirk on his lips.

"Yeah... amazingly shy." He snickers.

You turn in your seat so that you're fully facing him, nudging his shoulder in a playful shove.

"You ass, I'm trying to be encouraging here."

He laughs a second more before becoming more serious and sending you an appreciative smile.

He rests his hand atop yours that is currently still resting on his shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze in thanks.

"Thanks, Y/N. That truly does mean a lot coming from you." He glances towards you and sends you a warm smile, his whiskey eyes holding a glint of adoration.

The smile you return is just as warm.

"Always, Stiles. Just telling the truth."

He smiles and squeezes your hand one last time before placing his hand back on the wheel.

You try not to let your heart sink as you bring your hand back, telling yourself that it's just a safety precaution he's doing so you both don't crash.

Your cheeks heat up a little in embarrassment, but you quickly try to distract yourself from your negative thoughts by turning on the radio.

You turn the rock station on, Stiles grimacing from his seat.

"Why do you listen to this garbage?"

You scoff, "Garbage?"

"Yes, garbage." He chuckles sending you a sideways glance. "This kind of music is headache central."

"I'll have you know that Nirvana is a classic. I can't be responsible for your lack of education in the greats."

You turn the radio up and obnoxiously sing along to 'Feels Like Teen Spirit', while headbanging and acting like you're playing the drums.

Stiles bursts out laughing, turning to watch you in amusement, you quickly joining in on the laughter.

"The greats, huh?" He smirks to himself, shaking his head while pulling into the School's parking lot.

"You're something else, Y/N."

You both hop out of the jeep and are met with the rest of the pack who are patiently waiting on the two of you to get there.

You greet everyone with hugs and small talk, not having to go in just yet, seeing as School has not yet begun.

You turn to look for Stiles, your heart dropping to your stomach when you see him standing across from you, a lovesick look on his face, only his eyes weren't on you.

They were once again on the strawberry blonde who stood beside you, talking about getting your nails done after School.

You half-heartedly agree, your eyes not straying from Stiles. His remained on Lydia, looking at her as if she placed the stars in the sky.

You feel tears gather in your eyes, but quickly blink them away, turning to look in the opposite direction of him.

You discretely wipe your nose before looking back to Lydia who is still talking about getting your nails done and maybe going shopping afterward.

Of course, he was looking at her. Why wouldn't he be? She's perfect in every sense.

Unknowingly your eyes travel down her body, and you notice that she's every man's dream.

With her long strawberry blonde hair, big beautiful green eyes that are accented by long pretty eyelashes. You watch as Lydia laughs at something Allison said, her teeth perfectly white and straight not a flaw in sight, your eyes then travel to her pouty mouth that's always covered in pink or red lipstick. Her body is short and petite, and she's curvy in all the right places.

Not only is she beautiful, but she's also a genius and is one of the bravest people you had ever met.

You insecurely look down at your own body and think of all the flaws that you have. You wouldn't say you're ugly per se, but you're no Lydia Martin.

The more you counted your flaws off in your head, the more you realized it was probably a bad idea telling Stiles how you feel.

There's no way you could ever compare to Lydia.

But then your mind traveled back to all the times and instances that made you believe there was a chance he might feel the same way.

There have been times when it seemed glaringly obvious that he could return your feelings.

Like how you've seen him gaze at you when he thought you weren't looking.

And not just looking at you, but staring at and observing you for long periods of time. When you would catch him, he would blush and quickly turn his head as if you caught him doing something he shouldn't be doing.

You and Stiles have been best friends for years, so it's not a weird occurrence for one of you to spend the night at the other's house.

Scott too has joined in on these sleepovers sometimes.

But when you have a sleepover, Stiles always has to be in the same bed as you, and he always has to cuddle you.

He won't let you sleep anywhere else but with him, not even on the couch or with Scott.

Well except there was this one time that Scott needed someone with him because he was having a really bad night, you ended up staying and talking with him until you both fell asleep.

When you woke up that night you realized you were sandwiched between Scott and Stiles.

Scott was facing the other direction away from you two, whereas Stiles was behind you, his strong arm wrapped protectively around you, your backside flush against his front. His head nestled between your neck and shoulder, soft little puffs of air being felt against your neck as he lightly snored.

It's become such a habit that you and Stiles rarely ever slept without the other anymore.

Either Stiles would sneak into your room and stay the night, or you would go over to his house and stay with him.

Last night was an exception though, your parents needed you home to help them with some things around the house, and Stiles was grounded and couldn't leave because his dad was home.

You guess that's one of the reasons you decided to finally tell Stiles how you feel... because no normal best friends do that. At least, none that you've ever heard of.

But now, standing here watching him watch Lydia, maybe you're in over your head.

Maybe he will only ever see you as a friend and you read too much into things.

But a small voice keeps telling you that you still need to tell him.

You won't ever truly know unless you try.

Besides, it wouldn't be fair to you or to Stiles if you keep this secret any longer.

"Y/N... did you hear any of what we just said?" Allison asks, an amused look covering her soft features.

You blink rapidly and quickly look away from Stiles, praying to God that no one saw you staring at him for so long.

"No, sorry, I zoned out. I was thinking about which nail style and colors I want to get.."

Lydia smirks and nods approvingly before wrapping her arm through yours.

"Don't worry, there are so many options to choose from and if you can't decide Ally and I will help you."

Everyone starts walking towards the building, but you slow your steps and look back at Stiles who is engaged in a conversation with Scott.

It's now or never.

You gently unwrap your arm from Lydia's and send an apologetic look at her confusion.

"Sorry, I just need to do something real quick. You guys can go ahead and I'll catch up."

She sends a slight nod before grabbing Allison and them heading into the building.

You stand off to the side and watch the rest of the students filter in through the doors.

"Stiles.." You walk over to where he and Scott are heading inside, gently grabbing his arm to stop him.

He stops mid-sentence and looks at you, his sweet smile of greeting slowly turning to confusion when he sees your nervous demeanor.

"Hey, Y/N. What's up?"

"I.. um.. is there any way I can talk to you," You shoot Scott an apologetic look, "Alone?"

Scott nods understandingly, before hugging you both and saying he will see you both in class.

You watch Scott's retreating figure with bated breath, the same butterflies from this morning returning tenfold as you realize you're about to confess your feelings to not only your long-time crush but to your best friend as well.

God, you feel like you're going to throw up.

"Hey.." Stiles gently places his hand on your face and turns you towards him, worry clouding his beautiful amber eyes.

"Are you okay? You're pale.."

You softly smile and bring your hand up to cup his that's still resting on your cheek.

"I'm okay.. just nervous is all." You reply a little breathlessly.

Stiles's worried look slowly relaxes and he sends you a gentle smile.

"Well, there's no reason to be nervous with me, Y/N. It's just me, your best friend. You can tell me anything, you know that."

You take a deep breath and try to steady your heart.

You slowly pull your hand away from his, watching as he pulls his hand back to his side.

Now or never.

"About that, that's kind of what I was wanting to talk to you about."

His worried expression returns, his eyebrows furrowing in worry.

"You still want to be my friend, right? I told you from the beginning you're stuck with me.." He trails off nervously.

"Yes, of course, Sti. Nothing could ever change that."

His worried expression relaxes a little more.

Just rip the bandaid off.

"Stiles, there's been something I've been keeping from you for a while now. I did it because I was afraid I would lose your friendship, but the agony of keeping this from you, of always wondering 'what if', has become too unbearable. I also realize that it's not fair to you nor myself if I continue to withhold this secret from you.."

You watch him watch you as he slowly takes in the words you're saying. He nods letting you know that he's listening and for you to go on.

"I... I love you, Stiles."

His whole body sags in relief and he lets out a small chuckle at how worked up you both got.

"Shit, you scared me. I love you too Y/N. That's not exactly a secret though, considering we tell each other all the time."

"No, Stiles. I don't mean like a friend. I mean, I love you. As in, I'm in love with you."

Your breath comes out shuddered, while Stiles just stands there like a deer caught in headlights.

His eyes are wide, and his mouth is opening and closing repeatedly. If the situation wasn't so nerve-wracking you would almost say it was comical.

For once in your life of knowing him, Stiles Stilinski was speechless.

"Stiles... now would be a good time to say something." You bite your lip nervously, continuing to wait patiently for him to say something.

The longer he takes to respond, the more your heart sinks. Maybe this was a bad idea.

"I.. wha-.. when?" His eyes shut and he shakes his head as if that will clear his mind.

"Well, I've always had feelings for you. Ever since the day we met in Ms. Georgia's classroom. I guess my feelings just grew over time. I don't even really know when my feelings became so strong. I just remember one day you went from being my dorky best friend who always made me smile, to the guy who always made my heart flutter and who I started to envision having a future with. I remember during one of our cuddle sessions, how I just kept thinking that you felt like home to me, and I wanted to stay in your arms for the rest of my life."

Stiles watches you with a pained look on his face.

"Y/N, I... I love you. So damn much.. and I would do anything for you because you mean the world to me... But I don't think I see you in that way. I don't think I see anyone but Lydia in that way. It's always been Lydia.."

Tears gathered in his eyes as he watched you shut down in front of him.

Your nervous yet hopeful smile fell, your beautiful eyes that were so full of life had dulled and filled with tears as your heart shattered.

You knew this would happen, but that doesn't make it hurt any less.

Your arms wrap around yourself almost as if protecting yourself, eyes cast to the ground as you willed yourself not to break down and cry in front of him.

"Oh.. uh, y- yeah that's okay." Your small voice cracked and you felt like someone was crushing your ribs.

You felt physically ill.

"Thank you for being honest with me."

Stiles's heart felt like it was being crushed in his chest, watching the strongest person he knows crumble before him, all because of him.

He goes to reach out to touch you, but you quickly step back and shake your head no, sending him an apologetic look.

No longer able to hold your emotions in, a stream of tears fall down your cheeks.

If Stiles wasn't heartbroken before, he was now.

"Y/N.." His voice breaks, wanting nothing more than to reach out and touch you. To be able to hold you.

You bite your bottom lip to keep it from trembling before looking into his tear-filled eyes.

"It's okay Stiles. I don't blame you, and I'm not mad at you. I appreciate you for being honest with me."

You take a couple of steps back, watching in agony as Stiles stands there, lips wobbling and tears falling to the ground.

"Where are you going?"

You sniffle and wipe your tears the best you can on the sleeve of your long-sleeved shirt.

You truly don't blame Stiles, but that doesn't mean you can handle being around him right now. You're pretty sure you won't be able to be around him for a while.

"I'm just going to head home, I'm feeling kind of sick right now."

He unconsciously takes a step forward.

"I drove you here, let me take you home."

"No, I'm just going to walk. I need to clear my head. Besides, you have that test today." You force yourself to chuckle slightly, trying to show him that you don't blame him.

After all, you can't choose who you love and don't love.

"No, just, please. Please let me take you home." His hands run through his hair in a panicked frenzy. "We need to talk about this."

You sigh and give a half-hearted nod before turning and heading towards Roscoe.

Stiles is right behind you, quickly getting into the jeep, all the while watching your every move.

You sigh as you lean your body against the door, your head laying on your arm as you silently look out the window while he reverses out of the parking lot.

The ride to your house is silent. The two of you being too stuck in your heads to have any sort of conversation.

Stiles feels his heart completely splinter when he hears you sniffling and trying to muffle your soft cries in your shoulder.

He loves you so much, and seeing you like this is completely breaking him.

He hesitantly reaches a hand over to place it on your shoulder but you gently push it away.

His eyes blur as more tears begin to form in his eyes, making it difficult to see. Luckily you were only a minute away from your house.

As soon as Stiles pulled into your driveway, you quickly locate the door handle and open the door readying yourself to jump out.

"Bye Stiles."

"Wait!" He reaches across the console and grabs your arm to stop you.

You sigh knowing that the two of you need to have this talk so you can start to move on with your life.

You reluctantly shut the door again and lean back in the seat, taking a deep breath in to calm your nerves.

"W- what did you mean by saying bye? We're still friends... right?"

You close your eyes tightly, dreading this conversation.

Hating that you put him and yourself into this position in the first place. You guess people mean it when they say ignorance is bliss.

You feel more tears gather, but manage to blink them away before answering.

"Stiles, this is so hard, and I know it's not fair to you in the slightest and for that, I'm so sorry... but I don't think I can be around you anymore. At least, not for a while. Not until I can move past these feelings."

Your heart splits into pieces at the sound of a whimper leaving his lips, you look over and feel yourself break.

His shaky hands are gripping the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles are white, his mouth wavering as fresh tears fall from his beautiful eyes. His nose is red, his eyes bloodshot, and his body is trembling.

"Fuck, please don't do this, Y/N. I love you so much, you mean the world to m- me." His bloodshot eyes meet yours which you're sure are matching his.

"And you mean the world to me, Stiles." You sob.

"Which is why I have to distance myself from you. Because what you're feeling right now, I'm feeling too, only mine is a little more because I'm not only losing my best friend, but I'm also losing the guy I've been in love with for years."

You watch as more tears fall down his cheeks.

"I love you, Stiles, so much, and I'm still your best friend and will always be your best friend... I just need a little time to heal and get over these feelings."

You reach over without thinking and cup his face in your shaky hands, your thumbs softly brushing the tears away from his tear-stained cheeks.

"I promise this isn't goodbye. This is just, for now."

Before he can reply you reach up and place a tender kiss against his temple, his eyes squeezing shut in agony knowing he won't feel your touch for a long time, before you pull back and give him one last watery smile.

"Please be careful, Stiles. Please stay safe."

He bites his lip to stifle a sob as he watches you get out of Roscoe and head up the steps to your house.

He tries to hold himself together as he watches you enter the house, praying for you to turn and give him one last wave like you always do, that you'll give him some semblance of hope that he hasn't lost you for good, but you don't this time.

Stiles Stilinski is officially broken.

He had just lost the most important person in his life, and he didn't know how long it would be before he would get her back.