#anyway i dont think ive changed much but my life did
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winking · 2 months ago
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hmmm
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bmpmp3 · 9 months ago
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the really beautiful landscape/skyscape animation in makoto shinkai's works tends to be the big thing i see focused on and that is understandable and deserved like the weather and lighting effects are unREAL but i do think we should also appreciate how absolute insane the plotlines of his original movies get. at least two movies with in universe catastrophes with major ecological implications. the guns and explosions. theres that one movie i havent seen yet with the guy who turns into a chair (?)
#just watched weathering with you. it was really good. REALLY good#i remember when it came out people were saying it was better than your name. but now it seems the general opinion switched?#your name changed my brain chemistry and outlook on life. i think weathering with you may do the same#so to me i think they're like on pare with eachother. i dont know if i can choose which is my fav now LOL#they are sisters to me..... sisters to me...... quick review below watch out for spoilers#i dont think i'll be too detailed but i do also just recommend watching it its a great movie#I DID like the soundtrack in your name a BIT better like the score had a few more hooks for me and i loved all the insert songs#while in wwy i liked the last three inserts but the first couple didnt really grab me. but its all radwimps so its all good LOL#the side characters in wwy were so good tho like i loved all the cast so much#of course i adored the main characters of your name and wwy both. but the side cast in wwy ruled i think i'll remember them for a long time#the taki jumpscare was also great. my boy was here. my boy was here. just for a minute#i also adored how unhinged the main character of wwy was. hodaka was like. a bit unwell? HJKDJHKFD i thought it was great#weird and quiet but desperately a bit violent in a way that i think was very relatable#i also loved the like. message? sorry that sounds sappy but i liked that like the story was kind of like#coming to hina who is working so hard and forced by herself and circumstance to grow up so early and sacrifice so much#and grabbing her by the shoulders and telling her YOU CAN LIVE!!! YOU CAN HAVE FUN!!! ITS OKAY!!!!!!#i think it was so sweet and such a strong sentiment. wonderful movie. also there was guns and i was so scared#i think that might actually by why i love how high stakes the plots get in these movies like the character design and personalities are so#real and down to earth so when you go to the beautiful planetary skyscapes and also the exploding vehicals you get like so in awe or scared#it does also make me laugh tho now thinking about the your name nendos. you can just barely make nendos of them. you cannot make a nendo of#hodaka. hina maybe. but not hodaka. he is. some guy. the most some guy. visually at least. mentally hes got. something happening <3#loved him so much. hes normal. hes normal. oh they did make some popup parades thats cute#altho it is a bit funny looking. that is just like two normal teenagers JHKLDSHKFDLSafdjksd#anyway next up i'll probably watch the chair movie. ive heard a couple songs from it and they were pretty good so im excited#it also makes me realize i need to watch more of his back catalogue other than 5cm.... he has way more movies than i remembered#i hope someday he gets to make the yuri movie he wanted to. it would be unreal. huge beautiful skys. ecological disasters. girls kissing#oh i hope he gets to do it one day..... one day.....#EDIT: WAIT THEY DID MAKE A NENDO OF HODAKA AND HINA.... LIKE FULL NENDOS NOT EVEN PETITE.....#HODAKA REALLY DOES JUST LOOK LIKE SOME DUDE.... AWESOME
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todayisafridaynight · 1 year ago
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i'll probably be skipping stream today & tomorrow on account of my personal challenge to finish JE before you (<- absolutely not going to happen)
but while i'm here SHUT UP your headcanon is not icky :) though i can't really talk since i don't bring my own up very often either, and i honestly haven't even put that much thought into the logistics around it. anyway trans masato 🤝 trans wagi as personal coping mechanisms
DAWG you gotta finish it... idk how long youve had it but prob longer than me cmon now gamer i know you can do it ✊
trans masato is just funny because Like Everything I Do it just started as me joking about scenes from the game and then the ending happened and i was like Oh Lol It's Not A Joke Anymore I Think
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I DONT USUALLY SUBSCRIBE TO TRANS HCS EITHER THAT WHY IT ICKY TO MEAJLWKJL but thank you. i promise to only mention it once every five months
#snap chats#to put it bluntly i Do Not like acknowledge. That aspect of my life. if me never even saying terms outright is to go off of LMAO#i cry thinking about it- like right now LMAO I ALMOST DID I HATE IT i dont like using hate but... thats one of five things i hate for sure#My Issues Aside Tho ive already talked about 'my logistics' with trans masato but ill say them again cause its funny#1.) The Injection Scene like it's for his. Adrenaline or whatever but the first thing i said when i saw it was an injection joke#because literally how could i not LIKE LMAO THEY SERVED IT ON A PLATTER#and then there's the whole Change His Entire Identity After Running To A New Country#i always joke about wanting to do that so that's strike two buster#and then to top it off when he comes back he looks like every transman ever before the effects of T start taking effect#which is a hilariously ironic statement to make considering The Before And After but lol strike three bozo#AND THEN STRIKE FOUR WAS HIS WHOLE 'i changed my name and body' BIT LIKE DAWG YOURE ALREADY OUT#IK ITS IMMEDIATELY FOLLOWED UP 'FOR POWER' BUUUUT TOP TEN 'HE JUST LIKE ME FR' MOMENTS LMAOOO#there's also his voice- both in jp and eng- just having a sort of Texture(TM) to it#in jp it's sort of high and nasally while in eng there's a sort of gravel to it that's so 🏳️‍⚧️?????? to me. im sorry.#do you see. that's why it's so funny. its so painfully funny#the funniest jokes are the ones with Some Weird truth behind them by the most delusional bitches ever <- me#ANYWAYS. i promise not to mention it much If Ever only when something really funny happens to me that reminds me of it#and i dont have a sneaky way to allude to it in a comic or a fic#end of the month is always hell for me cause on the one side Yay Money but on the other hand its like I Have To Work For It FUCK#so i can only draw on the weekend#im having a month-long sale for december tho...... so if we never see me again thats why#EW I JUST REMEMBERED I HAVE TO DRAW FOR A SECRET SANTA THING TONIGHT NOOOOOO#and i wanted to finish up that fic... cause im literally three lines away from finishing it...#christ i need to learn to juggle better. for now im eating this onigiri that i was too busy to eat#anyway no one look at me im soryr for sharing my cringe </3 i prommy it wont happen so bluntly again
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termagax · 2 years ago
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i cant post the full of these until tommorow but bweeeeeee isnt he so cuteness
#did this comic relatively fast for me and i like about 50% of it#which. its getting posted tommorow morning so yknow itll have to do#experiencing one of those 'idk how to draw this without it looking bad' 'guess itll just have to look bad :sunglasses:' moments#BUT i think these expressions are cute and theyre more in line with what i want to be doing in general anyways? pushing it in a#direction i feel like ive struggled with before. i like cartoon overbites though i think theyre so adorable. maybe this is just what growin#up on the simpsons does to a motherfucker. anyways#my boyfie. baby style#trying to decide in my head how old i actually want him to be in some of theseeeee#because iirc. again im not going to check. the new official timeline puts him at being 20#but the way I had the timeline before in my MIND. he wouldve been a little older. not so much but like. 26-28 yk.#and fish wouldve been closer to 20-22#which idk i think its a little bit different of a dynamic to have 28-20 instead of two 20 year olds. so it would change things#but also i just idk i dont think him being that young works with how they talk about him pre-wasteland in. any of the official stuff#its just because he has terminal old man disease i think but like. idk i feel like even 28 is too young but thats like as far as i feel goo#squishing the junkertown timeline down to#and even then i think. that it breaks ? something else?#ive never done the maths but i think it breaks junkrat. because hes supposed to have been born in like. a more or less fully formed#junkertown? and with jq in charge for like. half of his life.#this part of the timeline doesnt work anyways#it barely works with the official read#theres not really a good way to have my cake (older boyfriend) and it eat too (everything else makes sense in my mind)#🐟
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jenivi · 1 year ago
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senioritis hitting me hard
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29121996 · 8 months ago
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#im gonna say smth and no one is allowed to say a fucking Word. i need to . type this out bc i cant Say It Out Loud#but . it is slighrly disgusting and patheyic (imo) and just . huh .#anyway . the tightening in evety inch of my body at the idea that . i might not get what i want (*) . but that even if i dont get that#ill get Something somewhat better n its just .#hard to swallow. bc im so tired for settling for what i dont want .#like letting go of shit ivrlly want for smth thats supposedly better for me#letting did not look like a real word just then what the fuck man#anyway . it is awful bc like . having so many realisations n realising that . ive forgiven a lot less and a lot worse .#n its a whole thing i cant get into bc im figuring out what exactly . thst sys abt me and where it stems from#it feels Okay . like its coming grom a Good Place. n not one of low seld worth#but like . having to possibly actually settle for less than what i actually want . is awful bc i dont like doing that and im tjred of doing#that. even if its good / better for me?#i cannot think of any other situstion simular rn other than yhe job fuckery. but . never wity a person#have i felt like this. n i dont know where or why its a Thibg. butcit is. ajd i dont know why hes fucking different.#but so much is out of my control !!!! and idk what to do anymore except just . keep pretendinf he doesnt exist#and moving like i did in high school: just zignoring how i feel bc i see the fucker constantly#it genuinely does parallel to hs rn how do i keep .#but also how is this a conpletely new situstion ive Never Exprrienced. how is this haopening to me.#i keep thinkibg abt the letter j wroye to my 21st (on my 18th) n i havent opened it#bc i missed opening it actually on my 21st. so i decided to live out actually being 21 before i#opebed the letter just to see how much had actually changed.#gonna open it aroubd my birthday. im terrified. bc i reread that letter 5x vefore wrappibg it uo. and ive thought abt it Constantly#to rmber its contents bc im Obsessed with it somehowm butbi still dont know .#i plan tocwritr another for my 25th. n 27th thrn again my 30th.#theyre fun lil time capsules . n its nice . i used to do 6montg to yearly ones but . shit got so bad i did Not wanna keep writing abt it .#so . this Will be fun . it was the 1st attemot at that too like . its why i started the 6mth letters bc i wanted to see the gradual sgifts#n reread them on my 21st but life had other plans apparently.#anyway.
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foxcassius · 9 months ago
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wait also my tags on that post were about people i knew in freshman and sophomore year of college specifically. i mean some of them i knew after that and most of them i knew from high school but damn some people really made everything about themselves when i was being emotionally manipulated in my freshman year
#i cant even think about it. makes so like disappointed and upset to think about some people.#its also just crazy how some people have like no introspection abilities at all.#they'll be like 'you did x once you abused me' ignoring how they did x 15 times and y 20 times and also came at me physically violently#and i know its not a calculator. i know i cant put all the bad things we did to each other into an algorithm that tells us who abused who#like i am aware that we had a toxic relationship and its better now that we are not in contact#but it makes me shake my head when i think about screenshots people used to send me of stuff my ex friends were saying about me on twt#because those people DO think they can put every bad thing ive ever done into a calculator that will show the result that i abused them#anyway. i like to think any person who knows me well and/or irl knows thats not me and i dont talk to almost anyone from that time anymore#i still follow and talk to fee...i think i still follow joanna but she is never on anymore....#in the end there is not much use in thinking anf agonizing about this anymore. i used to go into spirals a lot like maybe i DID abuse x fri#end and i just didnt REALIZE it maybe im CRAZY but. i definitely dont do that anymore. what she said to me made me do that.#(again. emotional manipulation.)#but its so crazy to remember high school and college from my current vantage point. i've lived so much good life since then.#now i own a house. i garden (something x friend told me i would never be responsible enough for) i have a boyfriend who has been scretly#into me for over year before we started dating (something x friend always told me i was imagining in people) i have a job i find fulfillment#in (something x friend said i would never find if i kept changing jobs looking for one i liked)#i feel like i make a post ever year or so when i inevitably end up looking back on those times...and i always feel guilty for making them#because i dont want it to seem like im gossiping or slandering (even though x friend posted about me all the time) but idk#i dont go to therapy yknow. i just journal and write and think in my head and on occasion i make a blog post with rambling tags#i talk to people and learn about them and through that learn about me. i read and learn about the world and the mind.#im not saying i wouldnt go to therapy if i could afford it...but i guess im defending my right to make a post about the past every year-ish.#it helps#t
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gibbearish · 11 months ago
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ok i finished the first chapter and am gonna take a break now but im v excited to keep reading im really liking the way the author looks at things so far
#there are parts ive kinda disagreed with either what shes saying or how shes saying it but i mean given the whole point of the book i doubt#that the author would take offense at that and would in fact encourage it esp given that its a book and not a convo#like. i should hope i have some disagreements with just the introductory chapter‚ she hasnt had a chance to fully explain herself yet and#i feel like having a written record of my disagreement before potentially changing my mind is very much in the spirit of the ideas this book#is offering yknow#like at one point shes talking about religious perspectives on wrongness and says some scholars believe its abt like#our wrongness comes from eden‚ our lack of understanding of absolute right and wrong that god has#but its like. ok but the whole point with the garden of eden was that the lack of knowledge of right and wrong /was/ the extra knowledge#god had and we didnt that prevented us from sinning#eating of the tree and Gaining the knowledge of good and evil was what gave humans the ability to sin in the first place#because if we cant know something is wrong and choose to do it anyways then what is the sin?#its like how with animals we don't see them killing each other as wrong#because they dont have 'morals' like we do‚ they dont have a sense of right vs wrong so the things they do cant be classified that way#so idk if its like. thats just a difference in how my church taught us vs the scholars the author checked out#or just like. a misunderstanding in the story of eden?#i just dont get presenting eden as the example for 'we dont have the knowledge of right and wrong god does so thats what makes us able to#do wrong' when the whole thing with that story was like.#gaining the knowledge of right and wrong was what gave us that ability. like thats just backwards#(also disclaimer that i am not a christian and do not actually believe in these things‚ im just using the language as if i do here to kinda#speak from the perspective of my past self who /did/ believe it)#so im excited to find out if like. shes gonna expand further on that (next chapter is abt history so maybe) and ill be like#ohhhhh ok i see what that meant#or if ill be like 'hm yeah you just maybe had a misconception abt how the garden of eden story worked'#and like i can kinda see room for the first one already in that it said like 'we dont have gods /absolute/ knowledge of right and wrong'#so theyre saying like. we were given /some/ of the knowledge of good and evil‚ but that that in and of itself didnt /actually/ bring us up#to gods understanding of it#idk its been a while since i reread the bible‚ i do kinda remember there being a second tree? but i dont think it was like#'tree of full onniscience' i thought it was the tree of eternal life or smth#or maybe im just mixing up the bible and the narnia remix of it? i know there is a tree of eternal life in the magicians apprentice#origibberish
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kalashtars · 1 year ago
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venting in the tags yippeee
#damien.txt#gender talk time 🤪✌️#....................................................................................#screaming crying throwing up rolling around on the ground <- said completely deadpan#uhm. as always. thinking abt gender. and questioning. my whole life. bc. i cant stop doing that#soooooo like. my big thing. abt gender. is as much as im like. he/they-ing it here and irl. its kind of... complicated?#as ive gone on ive realized more and more that i dont. really. feeling Anything towards those pronouns#neither do i she/her. or they/them.#and just generally the whole Concepts of male/female? so like. im always like hmm. whats happening here#and other completely incoherent statements djbdhdbf sorrry anyways#i keep having these moments where im like. hmm. maybe. im leaning too hard into the masc. maybe i am not. he at all.#but ive like. really full committed to the bit yknow? like esp irl. all the ppl ive introduced myself to in the last 2 years have known me#as 'he'. and as someone who wears mostly masc clothing and generally attempts to present masc#and like. i bought a skirt a while ago and i was trying it on today and i was like oh. wait.#and before u @ me i KNOW!! clothing does not equal gender!! but there was just something abt it#and recently (the past like. year lmao) ive really been contemplating like. what i actually want out of transitioning or whatever#bc like. increasingly its become more obvious how... fucking difficult that is.#and the more i think abt it the more im like. bro its not even worth it for me? tbh? also like. sometimes i look in the mirror and am like#hmm. this does not feel better than it did when i hadnt transitioned at all. yknow?#like the last 10+ years ive been existing in this state w my body where im basically just. tolerating it. ignoring it. even.#and that hasn't... changed. after t. and ik thats not like the fix-all but its got me wondering if some of it/a lot of it#is just body dysmorphia? rather than dysphoria? bc like. god knows i have that too.#and just. idk. i feel Really Really anti-gender most of the time. would in fact. not like to be conceived of at all.#but on some level im trying to think abt it practically bc if that ^ is my thoughts on gender fr. i have to decide whats worth it#and like. i miss cool clothes. god men's clothing is so fucking boring. holy fuck.#and AGAIN i KNOW gender doesnt equal clothes but also like. i am Aware to the wider world it still works like that#and truly if i rocked up to work/class in a skirt everyone would be like What The Fuck#and i kind of want to!! but im also scared of that reaction lol#AHHHH why must gender be so complicated. i want to lay on the floor#lol there was literally more but i ran out of tags LMAOO sorry everyone. gender complicated. peace ✌️
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phagodyke · 1 year ago
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prev post reminds me a friend told me last week she doesnt believe i actually struggle with emotional volatility/dysregulation like ive mentioned before bc shes never seen it firsthand...............
#i dont even know what to tell u girl. i couldnt even give her examples to dispute it bc i find it so shameful and difficult to talk abt#and it would probably be upsetting to her to hear the sort of things that have triggered me. and how ive coped with the outbursts#as if i dont structure all social interaction in my life around trying to swallow this shit down so ppl find me just about tolerable enough#genuinely hurtful thing to hear from someone i care abt. im not upset at her anymore abt it bc what would be the point man#i can understand why she thinks that + i cant control what she believes. but it did bother me a lot + some trust has been lost there.#esp considering she struggles w getting ppl to believe her when she talks abt how she feels bc she doesnt necessarily express it outwardly#in ways other ppl expect. like since ik that im always going to try to assume shes being honest so i dont disrespect how she feels#but its hypocritical + more than a little unfair to not offer other people the same trust + respect. why wont u take me at face value#and anyway why the hell would i say i struggle w controlling my emotions if i dont. what clout am i getting from claiming that#even admitting it is a hard thing for me.... and if thats too much for her to accept it just becomes a barrier in our friendship.#shame but i shouldve expected it tbh. anyway its ok ive moved on no point dwelling on it i dont want to bring it up again#bc theres nothing to gain from it. an apology wouldnt change anything since thats what she genuinely thinks#and whatever she wants to believe doesnt change the fact it is True and likely the biggest cause of strife I experience in my life#blegh stopping there bc im edging into rumination now#god im so tired. bedtime soon i think but maybe ill play a quick game or smth to make it to 10pm.... this week has been so long#.diaries
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wantitmore · 2 years ago
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russetfoxfur · 16 days ago
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had the worst idea ever
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💫star-of-the-show reblogged badassplum . . .
🔮the-universe-leads Follow
hey guys can we talk about the way the starromantics are appropriating the moonromantic flag? ive seen way too many ppl be just. chill with it??? saying mistfog like """"oh well the moon and stars are basically the same things"""" like babes have yall never looked up at the sky. those two things are Very Much Not The Same!!!!!
🍤plates-to-heaven Follow
the flags literally aren't? anything the same??? are you still using the moonro flag by stagefright-stardust. that guy was outed as a dischanger you know
🔮the-universe-leads
Wow! a clueless entitled vaugardian who without any proof decides that any astros are dischangers! stars could we just stop with the bigotry. anyways you're blinding wrong Look At This Fog:
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like literally the starro flag is just two less stripes than the moonro flag. could yall not stick a moon or star onto one of them to show the difference
🕺lordjose-fan-dre Follow
Good Change, astros are annoying. We get it! You're all hopelessly infatuated with the night sky! You know alllll the little lights up there because you studied soooooo hard to get an A+ on the test!!! Leave the rest of us alone!
🔮the-universe-leads
my brother in stardust This Is Basic Knowledge
🔮the-universe-leads
like if this were me trying to get you to name the stars in the sky then yea id see how thats absurd but like???? how do ppl live like this?????
starsaboveearthbelow-deactivated
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op i feel your pain :[ EDIT I KNOW ITS ASTRONOMY STOP CORRECTING ME
😺joyofjouvente666 Follow
Whats the difference between an astromantic and an islander /genuine
starsaboveearthbelow-deactivated
islanders are people from that Unnamed Island (you know the one, don't think about it). because its an island. this is most people. now scholars speculate that the Unnamed Island was really weird about stars. astromantics are people who feel like their romantic life is tied up with the island/stars. honestly im just a tranny dyke so i cant tell you what thats like
🔮the-universe-leads
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so firstly YEAH! yeah i wish astro trauma was more talked about in the astro community! like calling stagefright a dischanger or just hating on astros. anyway obviously stagefright's not a dischanger but apparently like most astros she was taking refuge in vaugarde. However due to recent circumstances relating to a certain monarch,
💎jewel8gem6 Follow
as a starro i think youre stupid. they literally have a difference of two stripes!!! i bet youre not even a real astro. to my starro followers: you all are so valid and dont allow petty infighters like op to divide us astros!
🍤plates-to-heaven
well actually while youre right about the infighting thing yall do need a better flag than the standard one stagefright made. i drew this in like less than a minute (forgive the messiness i edited this at 2AM my time)
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💎jewel8gem6
that looks blinding awful. are you astrophobic or something thats such a joke. blocking you
🍤plates-to-heaven
these are crabbing sketches??? not the real thing??? i know this is piss-on-the-poor website but come on
💎 jewel8gem6
Haha. what a fool you are to think me poor of reading comprehension skills. I am far above a blinded fool like you. Do you know what its like, being astromantic? every day people send me asks on anon yelling at me about my ugly white NATURAL hair, and you're just as bad as them. this is a disgrace to the astromantic community. you say in your bio that you are supportive of all astros but are you really? when you can create such mistfog as pictured above??? if you do not delete those pictures off your blog i will sneak into your house and suck off all your teeth one by one so you cannot speak your awful opinions aloud. i will tell the universe to kill your family and curse you with immortality so you can watch and suffer as horribly as i did laying my eyes upon these """""flags""""". wither and waste in the agony of your own unfulfilling and insignificant life, worthless vaugardian. be blinded forever idiot >:/
🔮the-universe-leads
i feel like this post is kind of getting off track could we talk about the flags again. plates' flags looked kinda cool and weren't cheap copies of each other
💎jewel8gem6
you SUPPORT this fool? you SUPPORT plates, who ruins the delicate harmony of astromantic spaces through xyr tasteless insults and mockeries??? how dare you calm yourself an astro op. TRUE astros must walk through fire in order to find any happiness in their perpetual incompletion. for example, i have been persecuted by ka buan officials for my sexuality, nearly slain by vaugardian defenders, and then forced to flee to mwudu in order to survive the king. fools such as you are the reasons we haven't found the island yet. a kiddie like you needs to go back to potty training if you think plates has any credibility whatsoever. go burn up in the atmosphere and let not a soul tell where you lie
🦀crabbingcastle Follow
Anyone in this thread eat crab
🌟officialastroposts Follow
Official Astromantic Post!
🔮the-universe-leads
i made this two blinding months ago and forgot about it are you seriously like. a vaugardian
👩🏿‍❤️‍👨🏼 mirafrin4ever Follow
EW AN ASTRO!!! go back to the ocean you mooneyed crabs. don't you crabbing weirdos know not to infest holy everchanging sites like tumblr with your weird stupid sky obsession. lol
🔮the-universe-leads
Saviorshipper. blocked
🍤plates-of-heaven
savior shipper, bolcked
💎jewel8gem6
Ew, saviorshipper. blocked
🦜pioupiou-9377 Follow
wow i cant believe ive found the original! ive only seen this in screenshots! and its only four months old!!!
🔮the-universe-leads
someone wish me out of existence already
#wow only six months old lol? this post is a mess. thx for putting this on my dash mira #poor op #islander talk #moot talk #longpost #shitpost #< i hope
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💫 star-of-the-show-2 . . .
@.star-of-the-show tutorial for you stardust! i want you sososo bad
2 notes ↪️ 💬 🔁 ♥️
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mymoshangthoughts · 3 months ago
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something i think about with regards to og!shang qinghua
i totally think he smashed mobei jun's face in with the rock
like okay the scene plays out basically the same, except instead of thigh-hugging, the original goods was groveling and hiding and dodging and only BARELY managed to survive for long enough for mobei jun to faint
so here he is, surrounded by corpses and a fainted demon and theres this big ass rock over there and he's like "yeah, thats the pragmatic thing to do"
but see, airplane and the original goods both vastly over-estimated the ability of a rock to kill a demon lord. so yeah, mobei jun has a nasty broken nose and he wakes up feeling like death warmed over in the middle of the woods but he's alive (this is btw the exact reason that the system was willing to let airplane do it, bc it wasnt gonna kill mobei jun anyway and it was what the og goods did)
and he was JUST conscious enough to see the original goods bash his face in
so mobei jun is sitting there like "okay, yeah, so imma find that fucker and imma enslave him and then when he runs out of use to me, imma kill his ass" because he's angry enough right now that simply killing og!shang qinghua just does Not feel good enough
and their relationship over the years is basically a big game of cat and mouse with them trying to fuck each other over. mostly the original goods trying to kill mobei jun and mobei jun just like "no imma wait to kill him until AFTER ive had a thorough revenge but fuck he makes it tempting to kill him right now" and og!shang qinghua highkey actually reminds him of his uncle. they're both the two-faced type who can smile to your face and stab you in the back and he's sorta thinking "if i cant resist killing one stupid human until the opportune time, how am i going to not kill my uncle??"
and basically it's just like..... lowkey shizaya (drrr!) vibes between them? and look, mobei jun is Very satisfied when he finally kills that worm og!shang qinghua but he also feels a certain loss because even though theres srsly no love lost between them, the original goods was basically mobei jun's companion for longer than anyone else in his life (enemy? frenemy? rival????) and it's just a sort of weird empty feeling after he's dead
and i just like thinking about how Different their relationship was because i like thinking about all of the changes that airplane accidentally created because he really didnt know that much about their original relationship. og!shang qinghua was such a footnote in the novel that there really wasnt any time spent on "oh yeah, og!moshang has a super weird hateship and shang qinghua did backstab mobei jun but that wasnt actually NEW, og!shang qinghua tried to kill off the king of the north at least once a month or so"
anyway i think the distinctions in the relationships are important for moshang reasons, because airplane and og!shang qinghua ARE different people, so they had to have made different decisions over the years, and those differences are why mobei jun was very much in love with airplane and not in love with og!shang qinghua
(altho i do enjoy og!moshang, but i will die on the hill that their relationship is different and whatever love might exist between them would be different. my hcs might not represent accurately how og!moshang's relationship was canonically but i just think it's important to make those distinctions)
but all these thoughts lend themselves to "what if pidw!mobei jun met airplane!shang qinghua?" because look, if they really were collaborating for so many years, he would KNOW og!shang qinghua. and as such, it wouldnt take him long to be like "okay but you're seriously NOT shang qinghua tho?!?!" and i love his confusion. like i dont think he'd show up and be like "guh, shang qinghua, gotta kill that rat again", i think he'd show up and be like "......well thats definitely shang qinghua's skin but that sure as fuck isnt shang qinghua"
and look, i want the chaos of that.
pidw!mobei jun and svsss!mobei jun discussing why the fuck shang qinghua is a completely different person and coming to their own conclusions (also naturally realizing a thing or two about cucumber-bro bc thats the other big notable change between worlds. bing-mei is fine, pidw!mobei jun always know that bing-ge is secretly pathetic)
also potential for kidnapping? like pidw!mobei jun nabs airplane with the intention of learning just who the fuck he is. leaving absolutely no room for discussion bc he's determined to figure this shit out. or maybe he just approaches his other self directly. or fuck it, if he goes straight to bing-mei because he's like "okay this is above my pay grade, boss of this dimension will prolly have an idea of whats happening"
also double penetration with two mobei jun's and one airplane lmfao. look im a simple man with simple pleasures
altho on the note of og!shang qinghua, thinking about this diabolical fuck does have my inner villain fucker thoroughly entertained and i wanna think about au's with both airplane and og!shang qinghua in play
there's always the good ol' sibling au's (which will always make me scream to the fucking sky "why the fuck wasnt airplane given a NAME so that i dont have to make one up for him!!!"), those definitely have the appeal of i can keep airplane!shang qinghua's design the same
so lets go with.... shang jingqi (original flavor) and shang feiyu (airplane), for simplicities sake while i explore stupid au ideas lol
so lesseee shang feiyu is born as shang jingqi's twin but since qinghua is a courtesy name and he doesnt actually know og!shang qinghua's birth name, he just knows that ONE of them is supposed to become "shang qinghua" and get killed by mobei jun. and look, he tries really hard not to get attached to his twin. he's used to keeping emotional distance from family, this should be fine, easy even. his twin even has a sort of asshole personality. so if he just doesnt get attached to shang jingqi and just lets the og plot eat up his twin, everything will be just fine and he can live a peaceful life, right? RIGHT???
but ofc he gets attached. bc even tho shang jingqi has a shitty personality and might actually be the original shang qinghua who backstabbed mobei jun and deserved what he got--look, thats HIS treacherous asshole and shang feiyu is ATTACHED okay
so shang jingqi and shang feiyu BOTH wind up joining cang qiong because shang feiyu isn't gonna just leave his twin to die but also he doesnt wanna die so he's really trying to figure out a third option to figure out how the fuck to dodge this all shang-murderfest thing when one day his brother comes home from a mission like "so i might have murdered a demon lord with a rock??" and shang feiyu is going to FREAK OUT bc either that was mobei jun and he is Not Dead and Coming For Their Asses or it WASNT mobei jun and its someone who would make mobei jun Very Angry if was harmed and shang feiyu is ready to hug as many thighs as he needs to so that they can get out of this alive!!! but shang jingqi already has a bit of a murder-boner for mobei jun, even moreso when he realizes theres like Chemistry between mobei jun and his brother and just Nope. that aint happening.
shang feiyu: i am trying to keep you alive wiLL YOU PLZ STOP TRYING TO PISS OFF THE DEMON LORD?!
shang jingqi: and IM trying to protect your ass from demon cock, thank me later
shang feiyu: ?!?!?! WHAT DOES THAT WHAT
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strawberryicedcookies · 7 months ago
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HOW I MANIFESTED MY SP 🧘🏿‍♀️🎀.
soo i started my manifestation journey back in 2019, but it was only until 2022 that i REALLY started to understand it. that whole year i basically just worked on my mental health and self concept and i felt pretty complete and comfortable, even if i was single. Fast forward to august of 2023, the school year had just began and i wasnt really looking for anyone until i met this boyyy he was so cute guys. he matched my energy and i grew a small small crush on himm 😭😭. i started working super hard on my self concept, i took care of myself, i made sure that I KNEW that i did not need him to make me happy. every night i would listen to a subliminal and do SATS as i fell asleep THATS ALL! I did not obsess over him because quite frankly, i knew my worth. i did not focus on the 3-d (because i didnt care) i knew he was mine, i enjoyed my time with him and all the moments we shared. (i was so delusional i just pretended we were dating and i was satisfied). We kept talking and my self concept just got better and better. I listened to a few subliminals and i did SATS, thats literally ALL I DID. Literally a month or two later he asked me out and we started dating.
unfortunately we are no longer together because my self concept got so bad because after i got with him i stopped working in myself like completely. i guess i became to much and he left me (umm fuck it we ball i guess) i didnt even bother trying to manifest him back bro that shit was so fucking crazyy 😭😭. worst moment of all 2023. GUYS WHILE UR DATING YOUR SP WORK ON YOURSELFFF.
SO A LIL RECAP!!
- SELF CONCEPT IS THE STAR OF THE SHOW!! if you feel like you need him, hate yourself, feel empty, or dont know your worth, baby your just not ready for this and you need to take a step back and work on your mental health. It is not just important for manifesting, your mindset is LITERALLY your whole life dude. Work on your self baby, nobody else is going to do it for you, unfortunately not even your sp.
- SUBLIMINALSS!! bro i started manifesting because of them, i love subs so much they help me manifest and help me stay awake while i do SATS, they are so so helpful i 100% recommend. (my favorite sub maker had to be ‘i want it, i got it’ her subs are GOLD.)
-SATS (State Akin To Sleep) bro sats changed my flipping life dude. Ive never manifested so many things in such a short amount of time until i started using SATS. Please watch youtube manifestation coaches explain SATS because theres no way i can fit it into this post. Thats a post for laterr.
-Consistency/ Ignoring the 3-D. I stayed consistent in dont think there was a night where i forgot to manifest bro, i was in a constant state of manifestation. when i tell you I WAS LIVING IN THE WISH FULL FILLED i literally wass!! I did not give one flying shit about what the 3-D showed me, he was my boyfriend n thats solved 🤷🏿‍♀️🤷🏿‍♀️.
ANYWAYS GUYS THATS ITTT I WISH YOU GUYS THE MOST JUICY SUCCESS STORIES EVER 😋🎀. Dont make the same mistake i did and keep working on your self concept babes!!
I love you guys! Stay safe and stay soft 💟.
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funkbun · 1 month ago
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please unleash the inspekta hecta thoughts please please
yesterday went into a bit of a frenzy over him. wait no ive been crazy over him since november somebody help.
also love your art!!
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bear my hectspek blast
Anyways I'm constantly just sitting here thinking about Hector’s whole situation. Obviously he fucked up severely; that’s clear as day, we’ve all played the game we know this, but I just like thinking about his life before godhood/his early years as Inspekta and how it all lead up to Everything and just, wuugh goddddd…
Like think about The Drain for a moment. In the game, it’s “located” between The Grove (this super important, mystical place where you can Literally Go Talk To Gods) and the Earth (you know this place). Whenever it’s mentioned, it’s just used as a negative euphemism, a place of nothing good. But it is still a place, people /live/ there, all the bizzyboys you see are /from/ there. And apparently it’s just hell, based on what we can infer about it.
And there’s something about how the Bizzyboys (INCLUDING HECTOR, ESPECIALLY HECTOR, THE FOUNDER OF THE BIZZYBOYS) are a bunch of lonely people trying to make a name for themselves, trying to find purpose in their lives, find something out of nothing. Even if they’re all from Literal Hell, they still tried finding a life outside of that. And Hector made them feel special, important, and loved and cared for and just….. auuugggghhhhhh I like to think that he really did do that. That he really did try his hardest and attempt to make their lives better for all of em. He didn’t want anyone else to go through what he’s been going through in all his loneliness and fears……….
I (personally) don't subscribe to the whole “Hector/Inspekta was ALWAYS evil and ALWAYS wanted to take over The Grove” idea, since I (personally) think that’s a pretty uninteresting way to view his character (personally). I think he truly wanted to make the world a better place, that he wanted to use what he had to help people and also change the way The Drain/Drainfolk are viewed to the rest of the world. His main fault comes with how he just didn’t know how to be vulnerable about his feelings and fears, especially going into godhood.
He probably thought that becoming a god would solve all his issues, but instead he just let his own destructive tendencies to both himself and others fester inside him for 33 years. I feel like King being elected as the new god right after his own ascension was sort of the breaking point there. Bauhauzzo mentions that it’s unusual for a new god to be elected right after another. To me, Inspekta probably interrupted that as the people of The Grove already grew tired of him and are ready for a new, more interesting god. Bro’s jealous! Bro’s pissed off! Bro’s scared! Bro’s insecure! It’s all pretty obvious in this line right here:
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You already know about that final fight with him, the ultimate crash out, he’s going through it all so fuckin badly, fucked up evil creature experiences remorse, he realizes everything he’s done and is about to do, he’s surprised that people Actually care about him, they dont want to see him like this, they want him to understand everything.
Hector’s back, wuagh. And now what is he gonna do after everything? What’s his plan, his goal, how is he gonna live out the rest of his life? It’s absolutely warrented, obviously, but fuckin imagine trying to enter back into society knowing you almost caused an end to all of it? How you almost killed the very figures you’ve looked up to for so long, how much they’ve inspired you to become the person you wish you were, and how you could’ve put an end to all of that? And everyone’s going to remember what you’ve done! Your public perception is going to be changed forever! There’s no hiding that fact!
And connect it back to his original plan, his original goal for himself and the bizzyboys. Trying to make the world a better place for lonely people like him, and it all really just crashed and burnt. He lost everything, he really did. His life is ruined, and I feel bad for him a bit, a Bit honestly, but this is also really the most fitting punishment he deserves. He’s going to live on with the weight of everything he’s done, he’s gotta bear it allllll. Anyways I think it works well for Hector to both be super miserable, sad, and remorseful for everything he’s done and even if he tries his hardest to make it up to everyone, he understands if nobody would ever forgive him for what he’s done. AAAAAND I think he should also be a little piece of shit, still trying to make up for everything but also being unbelievably frustrated and bitter when people still refuse him to give the time of day. Like what’s the point of getting better if nobody’s going to be willing to give him the chance to grow? Obviously his anger probably isn’t warranted after everything he’s done, but I highly doubt he’s going to stop being a petty piece of shit anytime soon. He constantly flips between these two mindsets all the time in my mind.
I hope you enjoy my (mostly) Hector bomb. Hope it was comprehensible lol. Kill grandpa.
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bobacupcake · 2 years ago
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anyways heres my twitter exodus social media rankings as someone whos income is tied directly to my following so i am stuck in this hell loop until i get paid enough to hire a socialmedia manager for our game studio
tumblr - i mean come on guys. ive been here for 11 years. i met th love of my life and became her friend via tumblr ask memes here. whats more to say. theres obviously things i would change but out of all of them this one is the one i feel most comfortable using. you guys always have my back 7/10
twitter - awful. awful. awful. i hate you. you took everything from me. we used to have cotweets. i was going to collab with my friends and post them as a cotweet. you bastard. 0/10
cohost - favorite out of all the new sites. in terms of functionality i dont have too much reason to use it because its ux is super similar to tumblr but the community and vibes are great. its run by actually cool people. you can put css in posts. i have seen so many cool posts. 10/10
bluesky - honestly not too bad from the usability angle. big thing keeping it down is its another VC funded thing so it will eventually become awful but for now its decent. its basically twitter but before it got bought out by musk and also you can pick the algorithm your feed runs on kind of like tumblr (so like you can make your default a completely linear timeline of only the people you follow. or a completely linear timeline of only your mutuals). if any of them become the proper "twitter successor" i want to believe it will be this one . not that i Hope its this one but i feel like if it isnt this one its going to be threads and i dont want it to be threads. 5/10
hive - it was mobile only and i needed to update my phone to use it so i never did. i dont know if people still use this one i dont think they do ?/10
mastodon - idk why i cant get into mastodon i have tried so many times i am just not feeling it. 4/10 for me but 8/10 objectively
threads - bad. bad. meta product. privacy violations so bad its banned in the eu. algorithm driven feed with 50 million celebrities i dont know and dont care about. mobile only. pleae dont let this be the one. please i dont want to use threads. i dont want to have to use threads. please. please. please you guys
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