#and whatever she wants to believe doesnt change the fact it is True and likely the biggest cause of strife I experience in my life

[phagodyke]

prev post reminds me a friend told me last week she doesnt believe i actually struggle with emotional volatility/dysregulation like ive mentioned before bc shes never seen it firsthand...............

[etherealkissed88]

I don't know if you've already made a post about this, but I wanted to ask: How can I be more positive about the protests, not being a privileged person? I'm not the prettiest, I'm not the smartest, I'm not rich (in fact I want to manifest better conditions), I feel mentally exhausted. I'm kind of just desperate to manifest a better life for myself and my family, but I feel so negative about it. I feel like I'm just going to become another one of the statistics about poor people; Sometimes I question the results of certain people, because I actually don't know if they are already privileged in a certain way, whether it's because she's pretty, smart or has money. Some people who talk about staying positive, manifest, selfcare, are privileged people, not rich people, but people with excellent financial and psychological conditions; I'm sad, because I really don't have money for self-care or therapy, I feel guilty, sad and insufficient because I don't have enough money:(

do not pretend these circumstances arent there. realize that you are self that chooses what to accept as true. yes, you have a choice. what you should do is become indifferent to what you experience. yes it is in the 3d but “it doesnt affect who i am and what version of myself i choose to be.”

i think the reason why u may be getting a mental burn out is because you are trying to persuade or force yourself to believe that what your human self is experiencing in the 3d, is not there. again - indifference. another important concept is the nuetral 3d. it never has original meaning. we give it meaning.

i know how you feel about being tired of life - and from my experience, i was so tired of living a life i didnt like that it motivated me to actually apply the law and use my power to get what i want. the law is always working for you so you are always in control, and when you live this “negative” life, it is you - the operant power, allowing yourself to stick in this “negative” life. you are choosing to be this version of you who lives like this. you are being the one who is living that.

know that it is not - the 3d shows me something -> then i become a version of me / i embody a version of me which matches the 3d. it will always be, i am a version of me -> the 3d follows that bc i am the 3d. signs follow, they do not precede.

you cannot let what you see influence who you become. bc who you become is why you are seeing what you see. who you are being is why you see what you see through that perspective, thro that state.

a lot of ppl have manifested great things and complete transformations without being privileged at first. stop focusing on other success stories and make yourself the success story. success story = changing self!

for the feelings of guilt and sadness, allow yourself to feel that bc emotions are human nature. what you shouldnt do is feel like those emotions are ruining anything, or try to suppress these emotions, or make imaginary and “negative” stories out of those emotions. they are always neutral!

when you are experiencing bad things, so what you need to do to make ends meet in the 3d such as getting a job to get that money you want. whatever you do shouldnt intertwine with the rich version of you that you are being. you can do whatever you want in the 3d while being/knowing you have what you want already. but you do not self-sabotage your human self because you think that doing stuff in the 3d will “ruin your manifestation”. example: you are broke in real life so you get a job while being the version of self who is already rich. it doesnt matter what you experience in the 3d bc all that matters is who self is being. if you didnt take that job but you are struggling financially, there is still the human self to take care of (you need money for food, shelter, etc) so again, nothing you do in the 3d matters as long as you are changing self.

to wrap up: it doesnt matter what you see in the 3d. clearly you claim: you arent the prettiest or smartest or richest. thats the issue. you are accepting those versions of you. you are being those versions of you.

& “how to be more positive?” : decide you are positive and happy. i can recommend visualizing yourself living the life you want and eventually you will fulfill yourself and be this new version of you.

skim this for other questions: 🧼

- cutie jani

[barb-l]

Vaggie is my favorite character, so I want to know where all of this hate for her came from. Like…people hate Vaggie yet love Lute, for example….. wtf? How? And I’m not saying people have to like the same things I do, but I’ve seen mfs bash Vaggie for things other characters have done. Again… what? The? Fuck?

Oh hohoho

I'm in a ranting mood, so let me tell you exactly why by paraphrasing some of the hate posts I've seen classlessly left in the chaggie tag before I blocked the OP's for said posts

"Vaggie has nothing going for her character. All she is, is Charlie's girlfriend"

- not even remotely true. She has a lot going on with her character aside from being The Girlfriend. She struggles with deep self-hatred, something that doesn't necessarily revolve around Charlie, although it does affect her relationship with her(codependency). It's a huge character flaw, though not necessarily bad character writing. It's something she needs to grow from, and something we can still see unfold in the coming seasons. Although she's helping with the hotel to be a supportive girlfriend, it is also something Vaggie believes to be the right thing to do regardless of Charlie. As Rosie inferred, Vaggie saw helping with the hotel as a way to atone for her sins and to do better. Even if the person running the Hotel weren't Charlie or anyone she fell for, I believe it's something she still would have helped with given her backstory. She has connections with other characters too that can be explored more in the future. Aside from just being "Charlie's girlfriend", she is Carmilla's possible additional daughter figure, she is Alastor's biggest obstacle in gaining whatever tf from Charlie, she is Lute's rival, and finally she is Lucifer's blatant parallel.

"Being a fallen angel is the only thing carrying her character. And we barely got any build up on that."

- let's say that's true. IF that's the case, why isn't anyone spitting hate on characters like Husk whose only "thing" is being a past overlord? Even though this had less foreshadowing than Vaggie's angel secret? Even though his only purpose in the story so far is to be Angel's love interest? He may be an alcoholic, but it's barely touched upon what terrible effects that may have for him. And although having his soul owned by Alastor sucks, does he actually suffer aside from that one time Alastor threatened his life? All Alastor is making him do is man the bar(so far). He has nothing to develop from with his character either. In fact, aside from the swearing and the grumpiness, he's a pretty swell guy who doesn't seem to fit in hell. He doesnt have a flaw that the story can aim to have him improve from. All he has going for him is his romance arc with Angel, and his past as an Overlord. Which, i repeat, isn't a bad thing! But how come Vaggie would get so much hate for similar criticisms, while Husk is widely loved by majority of the fandom?

"She doesn't have any chemistry with Charlie"

- something told by someone who ships:

Ch*rl*stor - two people who have only had direct interactions in the pilot(a quick dance number), episode 5(Alastor taking advantage of Charlie's daddy issues to curry favor with her and hit Lucifer's ego), and ep 7 (Alastor taking advantage of Charlie's dejection to make a deal with Charlie). A ship involving the kindest soul in Hell and a serial killer who has no desire to change and ridicules the dream Charlie holds so dear and is so passionate about. It isn't a bad thing to crack ship. Hell I do it too, but it's such a hypocritical thing to say that a canon ship has no chemistry only to claim that two people who have barely any meaningful conversations and positive interactions objectively look more like a couple and would be a better choice to be canon. Just because you like how they look in your imagination doesn't mean canon is objectively bad.

Ch*rlie/Emily - two characters who share so much similarities they can be sisters. It is such a personal thing. I have nothing against those who ship them. It just isn't for me because of the amount of similarities they have. With the intentional parallels, I personally think Emily would be better off having a gf that resembles Vaggie. Where Chaggie has a sunshine demon X grumpy angel duo, Emily could visit hell and fall for a demon who would be her opposite.

Ch*rlie/Lucifer - it's. Incest. Cmon.

"She doesn't care about the denizens of Hell"

- Vaggie's in Hell in the first place because she spared a demon's life. She cares TOO MUCH!

"Vaggie lied to Charlie. Even Adam was more honest with her!"

- I dont even... It should be common sense why Vaggie, who had just been betrayed by ANGELS, would not trust a demon princess with her true identity. Charlie and Rosie already talked about this. Or did they have their eyes and ears closed throughout episode 7?

"She ruined Lucifer's song by reprising it. Why would she do that when it's supposed to be Charlie and Lucifer's thing?? Why would she go and use a song about familial love and change the meaning to romance??"

- musicals that reprise songs to change its initial vibe has always been a thing, first of all. Vaggie reprised Lucifer's song specifically because they have been parallels of each other for the whole show. In fact, Lucifer indirectly echoes back Vaggie's reprise, with his lyrics in The Finale mirroring Vaggie's lyrics. It's not about Vaggie "stealing Lucifer's thing", it's about these two angels who both love Charlie reminding her of that love and how much they believe in her, despite being withheld of Heaven's love and losing faith in it in the process. It's about these two forms of love withstanding Heaven's abandonment and being there for someone who wants to face Heaven head on.

This is probably one of the most ridiculous anti-Vaggie criticism I've read. It's so weird to see such an earnest act of love as something audacious. If anything, Lucifer's the one with the audacity. I love him a LOT, but he did not deserve to be forgiven just because he had a beautiful song number with his daughter. It doesn't change the fact that he neglected Charlie for ages. If anyone deserved to sing More Than Anything, it was Vaggie because she has truly shown her commitment to Charlie. But, yunno. Baby steps.

Honestly for a lot of the characters in this show, all it seems to take for the fandom to like them is to have a song number that they like. People find Vaggie's songs boring. So they find her boring. Not a lot is known or shown of characters like Vox, Velvette, Alastor, and Husk, but apparently they're better developed. Just because they have sick song numbers doesn't mean they're better developed...

[morganafayes]

i want to talk about the dark tower (5.06) because it is SUCH a frustrating episode for multiple reasons. it’s unique in that it’s one of the only morgana/gwen centric episodes in the entire series - and yet it ends up becoming a detriment to both of their characters’ development. this episode sucks not just because of the evil gwen plotline (which was terrible yes. we love the writers just removing her autonomy over and over again for no reason!) which resulted from it but also because the lost potential of it all - when this setup could have been easily used to create some of the most interesting plot lines for gwen (and morgana) in s5

like. sorry to say but would it be that impossible or insane for gwen to actually sympathise to some degree with morgana here without magical brainwashing. to me its not! the thing about gwen is that she's a morally driven character first and foremost. one of the main reasons she falls in love with arthur is because crucially, she sees him as a good person. she loves him for the values that she believes he upholds and his desire to do justice. it was same with lancelot - it's emphasised that she liked him because he's honourable and good. we also see that she values her morality and doing the right thing above her own emotions at times (re: her not wishing for uther's death even after he killed her father).

with that in mind, would it be that insane for her entire perspective on arthur and merlin (AND magic) to change because of morgana? firstly, gwen never finds out that merlin poisoned morgana. this is very important to me.... because although yes he didn't 'have a choice' (im not gonna get into all of that but i understand both sides of the argument. whatever) he still did something wrong. like. killing 1 or 10 people in the trolley problem still makes u a murderer. she has every right to hate him. he objectively betrayed her and took advantage of her trust. i feel as if gwen would sympathise with morgana and at the very least this would affect her opinion towards merlin to some degree, and make her realise he's hiding things (because she, like arthur, doesn't know half the shit he gets up to and does! she even less than him!). furthermore (and more importantly) i can absolutely see gwen sympathising with morgana against arthur to some degree too. like yes he's her husband but AGAIN she's someone who always puts her principles first and objectively arthur is upholding his father's legacy by continuing the oppression of magic users. he is textually an oppressor. in 5.13 its clear gwen doesnt fully distrust or hate magic from her conversation with gaius (although she might be suspicious of it considering her past experiences) so she would probably be very sympathetic and understanding if morgana were to explain to her what it was like to be a magic user under uther's reign. how demonised and oppressed they truly were and continue to be. like. she would absolutely still criticise and call morgana out for hurting innocent people but ultimately morgana's cause (despite it being not really true to what it claims to be) would be sympathetic. at the very least she would see that arthur is wrong, even somewhat, for continuing to uphold his father's legacy. especially because (as the writers seemed to forget for some reason.) of her extremely complicated relationship with uther in the past, considering he almost had her killed more than once and did in fact murder her father because of his obsession with banning magic. and now her husband is doing the same thing.

no of course gwen would not side with morgana at this point in the story. but she would understand her and sympathise and it would create such an interesting moment of character growth/conflict. it would make her question her marriage, the things she THOUGHT arthur and camelot stood for and whether those things are really true. it would make her doubt merlin's character and realise he's hiding so much more than she thought. it might make her distrust him or demand the truth. it might make her wonder what SHE wants to do as queen, as a ruler in her own right, especially if she starts to have ideological disagreements with her husband. there's literally so much that could have been done with her in s5 as fallout from just this one episode and they did the most boring thing ever and made it suck so bad. bbc merlin writers ur not seeing the pearly gates

[lemonhemlock]

not sure if you've talked about this before, but what do you make of the whole "alicent was wrong to question the boys' parentage because it would mean their deaths"? ive tried considering it but im personally not convinced by it, that is im not convinced that it would automatically mean their deaths if their bastardry was publicly acknowledged by viserys and confessed to by rhaenyra and harwin. another reason why it doesnt really change my mind is that even if it was true... its like ok? therefore you must think viserys is in the wrong for wanting to mutilate anyone, children included btw, who says the boys are harwin's bastards. the thing is though i don't see team black saying that, instead its something they are usually happy about. they also ignore the fact that rhaenyra would have understood that this would happen, and yet she has two more children after jace. the thing is ultimately i dont believe the boys executed for something beyond their control that goes without saying lmao. but the fact of the matter is that alicent trying to have viserys admit the truth before his death, while the boys were young (or younger lol) would have been the kindest and safest thing! because if instead jace had ascended the throne as an adult, and been overthrown, he and his brothers would have been executed for committing treason. the mercy they would have gotten as children wouldn't really apply here.

''

I think that a solution could have been worked out if the truth came out when the boys were little. Death is a very extreme sentence. At the end of the day, Daemon should have been executed or exiled 24 times for his shenanigans, but Viserys always forgave him and nobody said a goddamn thing about it. At least in this particular case, the wrongs could have been rectified (which is more to say than for whatever nonsense Daemon did) - the boys taken out of the line of succession, both of the throne and of Driftmark. If you ask me, it would be only fair to disqualify Rhaenyra from being heir as a result of her attempted treachery, and that would be that. She'd still be a rich lady with a fire-breathing dragon and three alive sons and could have lived out her housewife fantasies in peace - there's no need to boohoohoo her. But, as a more indulgent outcome, it could have also worked if she remained heir, with Aegon (or his children) inheriting after her (since she obviously wasn't interested in producing trueborn children of her own with Laenor).

But, you know what, anything that happens is because of Rhaenyra's own hubris. To give a crude example, it's like saying, I robbed these three banks but I never expected to be caught and go to jail, then asking for sympathy. ?? Why do you keep having these children if you're literally so preoccupied with their safety?

[denzartriste]

I think the reason i don't like most modern or even old-but-still-modern-in-the-grand-scheme-of-things retellings of Persephone and Hades is because most paint Demeter as the bad guy.

The original myth (Homeric Hymn to Demeter) was very clear that, in all this, Zeus was the bad guy. When saying how Gaia was luring Persephone, the next sentence is "All according to the plans of Zeus." (My translation for the myth is this btw, i feel that's important to say because translations can be finicky--which I'm also gonna get to.)

I also think its important to say how the kidnapping happened, so I'm gonna paste it (from the translation I'm reading) :

"And the earth, full of roads leading every which way, opened up under her.

It happened on the Plain of Nysa. There it was that the Lord who receives many guests made his lunge.

He was riding on a chariot drawn by immortal horses. The son of Kronos. The one known by many names.

He seized her against her will, put her on his golden chariot,

And drove away as she wept."

It's a kidnapping, its messed up, but i also want to point out how it isnt a violent assault or rape like many people think it is--either is bad, but one is a deliberate lie meant to make us view Hades much worse and a lie i think actively takes away from this story.

Side tangent, real quick. Hades is the god of the underworld, and so we instinctively think "Oh, yeah, like the devil. He's like the greek Satan." because we think underworld=hell=Satan=hades=hades is bad then. Hades isnt good, because none of the greek gods are good, because these gods arent good and we think they are because christianity, the religion most people are taught about before they can develop their own opinions, tells us that gods are good.

My point there is redundant and repetitive, but its important for this. People think Hades is bad, and when they learn there are gods worse than him (Zeus, mostly they just learn about Zeus) they assume that that means Hades ISNT bad, because people want a good guy to root for and Hades seems like an underdog that never did anything wrong. It's also a common myth (myth as is false and not true, not myth as in greek myth) that in the actual original story Persephone just walks into the underworld/Hades doesn't kidnap her. That's not true, it comes from a 1978 story titled "Lost Goddesses of Early Greece: A Collection of Pre-Hellienic Myths" by Charlene Spretnak to make greek mythology more palable to her young daughter, the changes to all the story was just to do that--and then that led to a whole domino effect of people believing the unsourced thing. Im not gonna stand here and say that hades isnt one of the better gods morally speaking, but i am gonna stand here and say that the competition doesn't pose a high bar and people are not seeing enough nuance in him. Also him being better morally is because he doesnt have many stories--even regarding the myth with him and Persephone he isnt that important past the kidnapping. Fun fact, Persephone actually existed before Hades did. So i think that should be kept in mind when putting Hades on a pedestal, he doesn't have as much material to be bad in, so we see him as not as bad.

People are allowed to view Hades are this good guy or an evil devil, whatever, i will be a bit upset about it but people have the right to have opinions--but people also cant pretend those opinions are educated and well sourced. That's were i get actually upset and think its not just a matter of opinion but it turns into just misinformation.

Tangent over, back to the point.

Demeter hears her daughter and "She sped off like a bird, soaring over land and sea, looking and looking." 

She spends a total of nine days wandering all over the earth looking for information on what happened to her daughter, and i just want to mention that as Persephone is being taken she does think about her Demeter, and she has hope to see her again. (line 35 in the myth)

On the tenth day Hecate comes to Demeter and tells her that she heard the abduction, but didn't see who did it. Both of them go off to Helios and ask him which mortal or god did this.

And here again the myth places blame on Zeus, Helios tells Demeter:

"You shall know the answer, for I greatly respect you and feel sorry for you as you grieve over your child, the one with the delicate ankles. No one else among all the immortals is responsible [aitios] except the cloud-gatherer Zeus himself, who gave her to Hādēs as his beautiful wife."

(I think Hades should get slack for this aswell, he was the one who took her and all that. I want to be clear that i dont personally agree 100 precent with how little blame Hades gets in the myth.)

There's also mention about how Demeter is grieving for her child, Persephone, which is quite obvious--this story is about Demeter and Persephone so much more than it is about Hades and Persephone.

Here im mainly recaping the myth as im reading through it, and its long because the myth is kinda long but i dont feel as if i have much to say about it past the occasional thing here and there until we see persephone again, so ill make the text bold and big to the important part again if you want to skip.

So then Helios is basically like Well y'know you could have a worst guy for your kid to marry, Hades is fine all in all surely :D and then leaves

Demeter than shuns the company of the gods in her grief and anger, visiting mortal cities for a long time.

She's sad again, and im sure theres more about this i could say but right now i have a headache give me grace.

Demeter is approached by four sister (they are unaware she is Demeter because she looks like an old woman right now) and say: "“Who are you, and where are you from, old woman, old among old humans?

Why has your path taken you far away from the polis? Why have you not drawn near to the palace?

There, throughout the shaded chambers, are women

who are as old as you are, and younger ones too,

who would welcome you in word and in deed.”"

Demeter wishes them "kharis" which means ‘I wish you pleasure and happiness from our relationship, starting now’, and tells them her name is "Dōsō", the name suggest someone is a 'giver of gifts'. She says she was given her name by her mother. Demeter says she was taken by pirates (much like how her Persephone was taken by Hades, Demeter is grieving still.) and that she "fled her arrogant captors". (I think this is a clear parellel to what happened to Persephone, and how Demeter wishes she could also 'flee her captor'.)

She then says: "what I want is for you to name for me a house to go to, the house of someone, man or woman, who has phila children to be taken care of.10" The little 10 there is a footnote, the footnote being: "The textual transmission is garbled here, and my translation of this line is tentative"

Next part is long, im tired, it has a lot of footnotes and one is really long and i love footnotes but i also dont wanna read a huge paragraph of them. Theres mention of so many rituals i dont really understand. I am tired, forgive me.

A lot of footnotes, i love footnotes but im going to cry if there is another footnote.

Okay okay, im done being dramatic, but i dont want to spend time deep diving so the basic of what happens next is Demeter tries to make this baby shes taking care of immortal, (surely theres something to unpack there) but she fails because someone sees her burning this baby in fire and obvious they dont assume Ah, this is demeter helping my baby. No. They assume, This crazy woman is burning my baby my baby is on fire my baby is going to die And in some myths demeter leaves the baby in the fire and kills it after that, in the one im reading she doesnt do that and just puts it on the floor. Baby dies either way because she makes a promise on the river of styx that the baby's gonna die eventually and she says a lot and there are a lot of footnotes. Theres a bit more to it, she tells them to build a temple i think to appease her? Listen this post has gotten so long im not gonna say more than i need for this im bad at reading sometimes.

Important part again here!

Demeter then makes the world pretty unlivable, enternal winter basically--people are hungry, dying, whole thing. Zeus notices because hes not getting sacrafices of meat anymore, so hes like this is bad and sends out Iris. Demeter doesnt budge because she wants Persephone back, and they arent giving her persephone back.

Then: "the Father sent out all the other blessed and immortal gods. They came one by one,

they kept calling out to her, offering many beautiful gifts, all sorts of tīmai that she could choose for herself if she joined the company of the immortal gods.

But no one could persuade her in her thinking or in her intention [noēma], angry as she was in her thūmos, and she harshly said no to their words.

She said that she would never go to fragrant Olympus, that she would never send up the harvest of the earth, until she saw with her own eyes her daughter,"

After that unsuccesful thing Zeus sends Hermes "so that he may persuade Hādēs, with gentle words, that he allow holy Persephone to leave the misty realms of darkness

and be brought up to the light in order to join the daimones [the gods in Olympus], so that her mother may

see her with her own eyes and then let go of her anger."

So basically Zeus told Hades it was all cool if he kidnapped Persephone and now they're all in the finding out stage of fuck around.

We see Persephone and Hades for the first time since the adbuction, and Persephone is still very much missing her mother--she is sad, she is not happy, and she is still that way after very a long time (The time Demeter spent with humans is described to be "a long time" and the time in which Demeter has been causing hunger/death, not letting humans farm basically, went on for a year before Zeus paid mind to it.)

After hearing what Hermes has to say Hades, with whats basically described as a 'knowing' smile, tells Persephone to go to her mother, and Persephone is really happy about that. Obviously.

Here's the part where Hades gives Persephone the pomegranate seeds. Heres the quote so i dont have to vaguely recap: "But he [Hādēs] gave her, stealthily, the honey-sweet berry of the pomegranate to eat, peering around him. He did not want her to stay for all time over there, at the side of her honorable mother, the one with the dark robe."

Persephone doesnt willingly take the pomegranate seeds herself, thats something i have to say because sometimes people think she did when she didnt. Persephone isnt given a choice in this, she has to stay for one third of the year with Hades.

Sidenote--this hymm was only preserved on one thing, no original copies, and seemingly the part that explains why Hades giving her those seeds binds to the underworld for a third of the year (in some stories its a diffrent fraction, but the point stays the same.) is teared. And this is like one of the worst parts to not have but i digress. Cons of mythology is that its old and we rarely have the full stories on anything perfectly preserved.

Persephone says to her mom that Hades: "put into my hand the berry of the pomegranate, that honey-sweet food, and he compelled me by biē to eat of it."

I didnt know what biē meant but it seemed important to context so i looked it up and it means "Force/Violence." So, again, hades forced her to eat the seeds--But also i still dont know too much what i means because Hades was described as giving her the seeds stealthily, so i dont know why that would be there if he would fully just force her to eat them? But maybe force could also mean that he forced her to stay in the underworld for a third of the year, i dont know.

Persephone also was with friends when she was lured away and taken, she spents multiple lines saying the names of all of them, and a lot of retellings ignore the fact she has friends or a life outside of this thing that happened to her which is why i wanted to point it out. Retellings of this story typically put themselves on a pedastal compared to the original myth despite the fact they strip Persephone of her entire self that doesnt have to do with Hades.

I think its honestly purely misogyny, they also love to infantilize her, which is weird. From what i can tell the only times in the myth Persephone is referred to as a child is when Demeter is referred to as a mother. Persephone is Demeter's child, so when its relevant they say it. We dont know how old Persephone was when she was kidnapped because it doesnt say how old she is. Because honestly her age isnt that important--yeah, sure, i'd like to know what it is, but only because it would be further information. Gods are usually just old to a point it doesnt matter unless it's specified.

The whole point of this started with me wanting to focus more on Demeter and Persephone so im gonna get back to focusing on them and how retellings treat their relationship.

Retellings ignore any positive aspect of their relationship, which is stupid. They portray the two as clashing, despite the fact that they are describes as like-minded. It feels like cheap forced drama and like they want an easy villain. The actual bad guy in the story is mostly Zeus(and Hades in my opinion, but that's suprisingly more nuanced.) but if retellings make Zeus the bad guy, then they have to say why hes the bad guy. He's the bad guy because he told Hades he could kidnap persephone, but retelling dont like mentioning anything Hades can do thats wrong so obviously that cant happen, right? So making Demeter a villain surves multiple purposes. It takes away blame/complexity to Hades's actions, and in the same breath makes them moral. If Persephone's mom is sooo awful then clearly Hades saved her! Obviously he's good, obviously he's just misunderstood, the kidnapping isnt even a kidnapping if you think about it!!! Demeter being this awful unreadable mother in retellings only serves to make Hades more 'good' and, while you'd assume it adds some depth to persephone it just doesnt. Retellings never make her conflicted in a way that matters, it never makes her miss her mom or her friends--because she doesnt have friends in retellings.

Hades and Persephone's story is complex. It's nuanced in a way i cant even begin to dissect--Arguably they are one of the better relationship between gods, if not one of the best period. They have stories past the Homeric Hymm of Demeter--They have stories past the abduction.

And there's no point in butchering a story when there are myths in greek mythology that are forbidden romance + overbearing mother. If thats something you want, Eros and Psyche are right there. I havent read the myth myself, and my knowledge of them is second hand, but if you want an antagonist mother who doesn't like their relationship look no further. Ancient greece wasnt good to woman, i bet there are more stories with evil moms. Search for them. Leave Demeter out of this, and for the love of all thing stop spreading lies about this myth. There is genuinly no Pre-Homeric versions of it. Stop.

Anyways yeah this is long, have a nice day anyone who read all this. Also this is a good source for the myth and Persephone as a whole if you want to know more

[hearts401]

@charade-yes-from-youtube MCI!!! YIPPEE!!!

Gabriel:

-Oldest kid william killed. hes 12 and has a baby sister and a big brother (his brother is grown and is mike schmidt in my fnaf timeline)

-LOVES sports. he played a lot when he was young, but his favorite is basketball

-His family has a lot of issues, so he's a lot more mature than he should be.

-He actually disliked cassidy in life. to him she was too bossy and bratty, but he didnt care bc she was younger than him

-One of the more vengeful, since he thinks a lot about his baby sister and it makes him PISSED. hes close to cassidy and is super protective of his friends. Of course this means he violently hates michael

-extra one but he's very bitter about being in the animatronic. as much as he wants revenge, he also is one of the first to side with cassidy against charlie

Fritz:

-about 9 when he died, he's not as vengeful. He was mostly just scared at first.

-Close with Susie and was present when the bite happened. He wasn't close with Evan (hes younger than Ev) but he felt really bad whenever he saw him around

-He played soccer <33 which is why he was able to run away from william long enough to cause trouble

-Autistic, selectively nonverbal and doesnt talk a lot bc of it. he gets overstimulated by loud noises

-He had no siblings, but he was super duper close with susie. Her death fucked him up a lot and if it weren't for his birthday arty, he would not have gone back to the pizzeria ever. he'd hoped the party would cheer him up

-turned on charlie quicker than expected. he hates being in foxy and hes scared, so he doesnt trust her. he also viewed it as a selfish decision especially when cassidy framed it that way

Jeremy:

-Was very aggressive with william but couldnt do much. he was 9 (turning ten in a few months maybe) when he died

-hes not vengeful tho, not as much as cassidy or gabriel. hes moreso sad.

-sides with gabriel on everything EXCEPT charlie. he trusts charlie and believes she brought them back for a reason. but he went with gabriel because he didnt wanna leave him behind

-his big brother is the bonnie bully (andy my love <3) and their relationship changed a lot post bite. jeremy didnt know what happened until after he died, tho. hes not evans biggest fan bc evan helped cassidy turn the others against charlie and he hated to see her isolated like that

-he thinbks its hilarious that the nightguard has the same name as his. less so when said nightguard gets a chunk taken out of his face

Susie: (@walking-fnaf-encyclopedia u asked too <3)

-8 when she died. was there for the bite but didnt actually see it happen. she just knew a kid died because of the robots and only really knew what happened when she was told post-death

-surprisingly vengeful. this girl can fit a lot o anger in her. shes bitter that her death was based on a stupid theory, and even more bitter that charlie helped prove the theory true.

-despite that, it took a while for her to give up on charlie. in fact the split between the mci and charlie ruined her view of evan and cassidy more than it did charlie. susie, just like jeremy, could tell they were isolating her and she did not like it. she doesnt fully blame them (considering she agrees with them) but she believed there was a better way. they were already here, why not work together?

-her dog possesses the cupcake! she knows this and cherishes the little guy but she also feels so fucking sad her poor dog got dragged into this. he seems pretty chill with it tho LMAO

-actually the most chill w the nightguard. after all, its not him who wronged her lol

Cassidy:

MY FAV MY BELOVED OKAY

-11 when she died. second oldest meow and she fucking FOUGHT LIKE HELL. whatever jeremy did to will was nothing compared to her. she was a cornered rabbit and she showed her claws she fucked him UP. broke his nose cut his face she did everything to get away from him. he had to make up a story about a person attacking him (which ended up being the first lie henry cracked that lead up to him finding out william was the killer so. pop off cass)

-Knew evan before she died. did not gaf abt him. he was just the whiny kid to her. but tbf she didnt know anything about michael. she'd shoo off any bullies she saw hanging around him, though. he noticed but never mentioned it

-violent anger she got from her mother. yeah you can assume what her home life was like. she had a lot of expectations placed on her as the only child. her parents were business people, always rushing and never pausing to let her catch up, so she learned to keep running, fall less, and work harder. of course, the faster you go the harder you'll fall but dont tell her that

-loves dressing herself up, but her mother prefers to do it. cassidy hates hwen other people make decisions for her (which contrasts evans hate for making decisions himself)

-violently hates charlie. they used to be close when alive but post death not only was cassidy pissed that charlie brought the other kids back (in my hc, cassidy came back of her own accord) but also that charlie now wanted to give up on their mission for vengence. she found the "happiest day" to be trivializing their cause and, once the other kids were gone and passed on, promptly destroyed it. Evan similarly refused to move on, and they stayed behind together

-despite this, cassidy did try to convince charlie not to go to the pizza sim location. charlie didnt listen, got trapped in lefty, and caused cassidy to have a severe hatred for henry that lasts on and on and on for a long time until she finally visited him at the lake. but hes just like his daughter, and cassidy listened to him even less than shed listened to charlie

[issaphina]

Not everyone can say they’ve been to the Big Apple, but  [ NYX HERRERA ], a [ TWENTY-SIX ] year-old [ CISFEMALE ] has lived in [ GREAT KILLS, STATEN ISLAND ] for [ SIX MONTHS ]. This is the city of dreams and [ SHE/HER ] knows it, because they came to NYC to be a/n [ PROFESSIONAL SUGAR BABY / SCAMMER ]. Living in the city means they meet all kinds of people, but everyone always seems to think they look like [ CIERRA RAMIREZ ]. They even got away with free cab fare once because of it!

&; TW: domestic abuse, cheating

  Quick Fire Facts ( will add more ):

Born and raised in Staten Island.

 Libra (10.18.), believes in zodiacs and is v spiritual.

into witchy shit

femme fatale

chews people up and spits them out when bored but is tired of it.

wants to get into a different field of earning money

loves all genres of music, to read, and fashion, kind of wants to get into it

smokes weed, loves drinking, never ciggies.

uptight but laid back stoner, control freak, but doesnt care about anything, just alll around bad ass chick who doesnt realize how depressed she is and how muh she needs to change her life from the SB life bc its draining her completely

headcanons:

Nyx ( Staten Island born and raised ) always had an estranged relationship with her parents, being the middle child she sort of got forgot about. She moved out of her family home when she was just 17, she had been taking care of herself for a year anyway. She never went to college, opted for the workforce instead. She has always been a go-getter, and even if she was making 7.50 an hour, she always had the latest in fashion, and a big bag in her purse.

When Nyx turned 20 she discovered seeking arrangements and the life of a sugar baby(SB/SD), she instantly fell in love with it. Get whatever she wanted for minimal work? Because she’s hot? It was her dream come true. That was until she was 23, and she fell in love with one of her SD’s, she moved in with him, stopped seeing everyone else, thought she was in love and found the one she was going to be with forever. That was until she got pregnant, he accused her of cheating and still doing her SB work, and got physical with her. She apologized for upsetting him, and waited until he went to bed to look through his phone; only to find out that he had been seeing other women the entire time they were together and isolating her away from the few people she did have by lying about them and she believed him. She now has to live with herself knowing that she could have a four year old child out there but she chose to stay with a man who left her three weeks later for someone younger and dumber.

She does credit card scams on the side as a way to support her lavish lifestyle she has came to love in the last decade. Coming up on the poor side of Staten Island didnt matter, she always surrounded herself with the snooty kids who wouldn’t notice if they were missing a few hundred bucks or a plastic card when they have twenty of mommy and daddys. As she got older, her hustle got more advanced, she only stays at a call center long enough to bleed a few people dry before moving on.

She still does SB work, she’s trying to branch into life insurance work and maybe property management or cooking professionally.  She’s honestly just trying to figure out what she wants to do with her life and feels like she needs to surround herself with new people away from California and go back to her routes.

[acaciapines]

it feels like in your fics, daemon settling is presented as a bad thing! can I ask where that is coming from, and what settling means there if it's not about adolescence?

dklfngnkdfgdf i was wondering when someone would ask me this.

the answer is that it depends on the story im trying to tell, and it just so happens that the one im currently writing (toh daemon au) and to a lesser extent the one im posting (pmmm daemon au) have themes in their original shows that just so happen to best support this reading of daemons! like, if you read some of my other stuff, ex the wolf 359 daemon au, its nothing like this lol, my daemon lore does not carry across unrelated fics.

the best way i can describe it is through the unposted owl house daemon au so apologies in advance. also spoiler warning for the fic series. it doesnt exist yet but a lot of this stuff is things we learn throughout the series.

essentially, though, when i am writing a daemon au, there is always some particular aspect of the original media that i think i could explore in depth by adding daemons! in wolf 359 it was this idea of personhood, and so that is what i focused on when adapting my daemon lore in those fics. in toh, its this idea of growing up and being forced to choose things.

if you look at luz, in toh, her story is very much about this idea of like. in a lot of isekai stories the protagonist goes home at the end, yknow? this is what is supposed to happen, they learn something in this new world, and then go home changed, but they GO HOME. but the whole thing with luz is that like--the human world wasnt ever her home, not really. the only person she had there was her mom. but in the boiling isles, now, THAT is a home for her!

but...shes supposed to go back to the human realm. shes not supposed to stay. and so a lot of her arc, to me (and what i choose to focus on in my au) is this idea of what you are 'supposed' to do (ie what society says is acceptable) and what actually makes you happy, and is the life you want to live. in the show, this accumulates in luz's palisman (daemon equivalent, basically) not just being one animal, but being a snake that can shift into a whole lot of other animals--it is this way of showing that like. luz never had to choose. to force her to choose is something about society that is sorta fucked up. its this idea that we act like kids are able to figure out their entire future, that you make a choice and that determines your life forever. but like...no? you can change! thats AMAZING, that people are able to change!

and so to tell that story daemon settling has to be about something you are forced into too young. that to act like a 14 year old can figure out their entire future and never have the possibility to change later down the line and make another choice and figure out something new is...bad, actually? life doesnt end when youre young!

or something like that lol i always always believe i will say what im trying to say better in the actual text of the story itself vs trying to write it all out like that.

and to be fair a lot of this also comes from the fact that all of my daemon aus are in conversation with typical daemon aus that pop up in fandoms, and also to an extent daemons as they are seen in his dark materials, because i have A Lot Of Feelings about it, and a lot of daemon aus are just...not about daemons. and i like telling stories ABOUT daemons, not just stories where the characters happen to have an animal companion sometimes. and this is especially true of the owl house daemon au bc the entire way im building up the human world and how it works is um. um its just stuff i think sucks in most daemon aus/hdm and why i think that.

anyways. tl;dr: daemons are about whatever the core of the story i want to tell is and it just so happens in the stuff im writing right now daemon settling being a negative fits that core.

you (general) can always send me more specific followups about this too! i am literally always down to talk about daemons and daemon aus bc This Is My Thing i have decided and i love love love talking about it.

[ooglywooglies]

yknow that thing i said awhile ago about how trans men and trans women probably inherently make each other dysphoric. i think i was right, i love my girl mutuals and people i follow and stuff but sometimes all the girlcentric stuff kind of wears me out, like dont stop posting what you wanna post but i need to figure something out.

tags were getting too long so im just continuing the post because i guess i cant express the sentiment i want to without dragging on

if you pay attention to my long posts youve probably figured ive been going through some insecurity issues recently, a lot of it is not helped by the fact that i keep doomscrolling on tumblr and digging into discourse tags like the whole "transandrophobia" thing, ive since changed my mind about that tag btw. yknow how i said before that "its a stupid term that has no basis in reality but the transphobia and misogyny trans men face is a real issue that probably needs a specific name for categorization purposes specifically on tumblr dot com" no i think its not important afterall

mostly because ive been watching the decay of this tag for a long time and it keeps CONSTANTLY getting infiltrated by terfs and transmisogynists and ive been talking to someone who is trying to deradicalize people involved and shes like yeah this whole theory/movement/framing basically encourages self pity and resentment so its a breeding ground for transmisogyny (and regular misogyny) and i think i agree with that

but its hard not to see the problems with this tag/community/whatever it is and the response transfeminists have to it and now just go god transmascs are fucking annoying, and i feel embarrassed to be associated with them

and thats stupid, its basically the same thing as white guilt, yknow that thing where when white people learn racism exists they go oh well im sorry for being alive it would be better if white people were just never born. its like no one asked you to feel sorry for YOURSELF (or anyone else, poc in this situation just want you to be responsible when necessary and be respectful)

so like, im not ashamed of being a trans man i guess, not on the basis that theyre capable of and often perpetuate transmisogyny. i think ive talked before about feeling like being a trans man could be antithetical to feminism because some feminists suggest that manhood/masculinity is an inherently toxic and oppressive class, if thats true transitioning into manhood/masculinity would be a morally objectionable thing to do. i think being a man is not inherently bad, i think that gender is not a choice even if one has some benefits over the other (why would trans women ever "choose" to be women if the only factor of gender was privilege) i think this sentiment im so worried about is something basically only terfs (cis radfems) actually believe and try to perpetuate

but i also mentioned on another post that "tumblr tricks you into thinking trans people are annoying" and also that a lot of transmascs both in the tag but also on this site in general are like not older than 22

a lot of the trans guys i follow or are friends with (none of my twitter guys are here and i dont do twitter anymore) are closer to my age, being in their late 20s and you can FEEL the maturity difference. i think being on tumblr does make you think that all transmascs are basically annoying middle class teenage white people who only watch childrens cartoons and it makes the stereotypes about transmascs feel even HARDER to escape from. I CONSTANTLY feel insecure about having feminine interests, about being minimized and belittled, being infantalized, being emasculated, it really doesnt fucking help that im also (south)east asian and historically east asian people have been like hyperfeminized/emasculated compared to other groups

im not sure if im done with this post or not but i got distracted after writing this so i cant remember if i wanted to say anything else so im just gonna be done now

[surefireshore]

dove i am reblogging bc i dont think this could fit in a comment. Short answer: yes.

Long answer: I live alone, and my dog is a very sleepy old boi, so if I'm not making noise there is simply no noise. So i started saying my thoughts out loud. It's usually small stuff like "oh shit" or "where did i put my phone" etc., but as i continue to live alone it happens more often with different things.

Only very recently did i learn that something i meant to be an inside thought had broken containment into being a public thought. I am now going to share an unflattering story about myself.

I learned that [redacted] had gotten a puppy from a breeder, and i was asking them about it. Bc like!! Adopt dont shop, ya know? I was trying to understand why they went with shop, but also trying not to shame them about decisions they are excited about and cant change. The relevant bit went something like this, except actual dog names were used:

[Redacted]: Yeah we actually got dog 2 from the same person as dog 1.

Me: so theyre both from a breeder?

[Redacted]: yeah but she- the person we got them from- is responsible about it. Like she doesnt do it very often and stuff like that.

me: how far apart are [your two puppies] in age?

[Redacted]: about six months

My thought: sounds like she does it pretty often then.

After this, the conversation pittered out and moved on and it wasnt until like the NEXT DAY when someone was like "i cant believe the sass/audacity/comeback you had about [redacted's dogs]" and i had to be like "???? What are you talking about i didnt say anything?" And THAT was when i learned that i had in fact said something and also been rude.

So i think there's a number of factors that can lead someone to say something they dont know they're saying, all of which make a perfect storm into the social nightmare that is me:

Spending lots of time alone, which switches your instinctive/default mindset from "i must be considerate of other people's peace by being quiet" to "noise i make does not matter bc there is only me to hear it". Not that I cant be in the first mode, just that i am by default in the second one.

Poor impulse control. My ADHD-ass already has a brain-to-mouth filter delay of -0.5 seconds, which means im often only thinking about what im gonna say when im already saying it. I recognize that this is a Problem, but it is currently true and thus relevant to the point im making.

Feeling strongly about something but not wanting to share it. When the poor impulse control is in place and you really want to say something, it's instinctive to say it. Almost automatic. If you have no reason not to share something, you could/might just say it and it would be fine. It's only when there's incentive to hide what you're thinking that this breakdown might occur. The brain is thinking "oh we wont say this" while the mouth is already saying it.

A naturally loud voice. I think there is a world where this scenario happened and I muttered the sentence under my breath and no one heard me. But my hearing isn't very good so I'm a bit loud (also bc of the 1st point), so i said it full volume for everyone to hear.

All this to say that yes, I think there is a certain type of character who can say things without knowing it or meaning to, but I don't think that is every character. Someone who is naturally very quiet and/or spends a lot of time around other people might not. Someone who is already passionate and quick to speak whatever is on their mind might. Sam Gamgee might not, Pippin might. Lan Xichen might not, Wei Wuxian might. I think characters like Jean Valjean or Enjolras have too much self-control, but Grantaire or Gavroche might.

has anyone ever, in real life, not realized they were speaking out loud?

it's such a common trope in fic to write out a character's thoughts and then reveal in the next paragraph "oops, I guess I said that out loud." like they didn't realize words came out of their mouth until somebody else responded to them.

i have had the opposite happen, where i thought something very clearly and didn't realize i'd failed to share the thought aloud, but never in my life have i been having a normal awake conversation and not noticed that words came out of my mouth.

does this actually happen to anyone???

[un-pearable]

ALRIGHTTT season 9 thoughts. this one wont be nearly as long as last time because honestly i dont have too much to say

um first things first i cant believe they killed the ultra dragon offscreen and nobody even made a comment on it. okay thanks ninjago writers. like i guess it died how it lived (aka completely irrelevant) but also.......... wow thats pretty brutal

jay losing his mind and completely giving up on life at the beginning of the season was really funny. i feel like this sums up lloyd & jay at the beginning of s9 pretty well

this frame made me laugh really really hard. is it really that funny? ... ok honestly yes yes it is

... and other important intellectual discussions that were had

also the old tea lady is so funny. if shes dead im sad about it but this is ninjago so there is an at least 67% chance she will come back next season. its no wonder she and wu got along theyre basically the same person

i was also DELIGHTED by the fact that we got not one but TWO scenes of people who really deserve to be run over by a truck getting run over by a truck. the only way this couldve been improved is. okay because comedy comes in threes right. and, as much as i love him and as much as i know this is entirely 10000% not his fault, this season's garmadon really deserves to get run over by a truck. frankly. im not sure if it would help lloyds mental state any but who knows maybe he'd find it a little cathartic. but i am very pleased with what we got anyways.

regarding the oni thing with them being shapeshifters, i have a few questions. 1) can garmadon and lloyd and wu do it. i hope so. canonically im leaning towards no but in my heart i want it to happen at some point. 2) ok so you can shapeshift into other people / things / stuff that already exists. so my question is: can you mix and match. can you give yourself pointy teeth. can you make yourself a furry. im asking the real questions here.

the ninjago timeline continues to elude me. i feel like i make this comment every single season but its true. the old tea lady implies that garmadon and wu have been living for a very, very long time, but also they were young adults at the same time the elemental masters were. my questions are infinite and my answers are few. between how old lloyd is and how old the elemental masters are and how old wu and garmadon (and misako ?????????) are and how all of this fits into a coherent timeline, i havent the FAINTEST CLUE. the writers arent even trying and they werent from the beginning. in fact i would honestly argue that the timeline is the most confusing aspect about ninjago, which is saying a lot because frankly this show is very, very, very very very confusing. all the time.

if possible, ive become even more annoyed by the writers' inability to let lloyd lead for more than five minutes. theyre allergic to changing the status quo, frankly, which is why we're rehashing the entire first two seasons i guess. like literally we are rehashing it entirely except making tumblr user iratusmus more annoyed along the way. mainly because they've taken out what makes garmadon an interesting villain and made him bland and boring and im annoyed. but we've already gone through that. OH YEAH BACK TO MY ORIGINAL POINT

anyways so what i was trying to say is that now that wu has returned, we're walking back the past three seasons of lloyd and his kind of character development in regards to leading. because, like, s7 kickstarted an arc where lloyd is now put into a position of being the leader which he isnt prepared for and doesnt really want, but a responsibility he has nonetheless. they dont really resolve it by the end of the arc - lloyd's barely even relevant in the climax and his decisions as a leader certainly arent, but we're left assuming that this will get resolved next season... right? and the writers skip most of that by giving us a 1 year timeskip, but then give him a leadership crisis anyways so whatever i guess we're still going to do that, and then after we sort of resolve that, wu shows back up again with the ninja and immediately starts dishing out orders and lloyd goes back to not being the leader and its just. well. what was the point of all that then? but also as stated previously, thats mostly just these past two seasons in a nutshell. what was the point of all that then. because we are, again, rehashing. the first part of the series. but whatever.

im also still sad about the noticable lack of oni teeth on garmadon or lloyd but like. whatever. fine. im not bitter (<- bitter)

so yeah thats my season 9 thoughts. coulda been worse, probably. it was fine. i miss lloyds old hair. thas about it

ah, the good ol ridiculously overpowered plot device that gets wordlessly shelved when they arbitrarily need them not to use it... we will miss you greatly (until the latest season finishes pulling off whatever bs its heading for given the sets)

... i have heard much about s9 jay and ngl im excited. he's fascinatingly messy as a character im looking forward to it. he deserves a bit of a breakdown i think. good for him. lets him pioneer a whole new way of being annoying. quoting someone from the tags of one of my jay posts but yeah being annoying is a character win actually.

it IS that funny asdkfjksdfj. the shot composition on this show is either painfully bad or utterly hilarious and kudos to the storyboard artists having to work within the lego constraints either way. the return of garmadon's sewing skills... ty. wu deserves his thematic counterpart in mistake. he also deserves to finally learn how to make good tea. the fact that hitting people with trucks is its own whole trope is just delightful. congrats to movie knuckles for joining their ranks.

they SHOULD. you are asking the important question its a damn shame they didn't capitalize on it. lloyd deserves to have one of those goofy episodes where someone finds out they can shapeshift and gets stuck in increasingly confusing and hilarious forms. he also deserves to fuck with his friends and change minor things and pretend he's always had them. what do you mean the tail's new.

i'm an annoying cole leadership truther but yeah,, yeah. at the very least commit to it. if you're aiming for lloyd to be the leader all the time rehashing the exact same arc over and over is both boring and?? squandering it?? there is SO MUCH potential for arcs beyond the initial can-they-lead and i know we're allergic to change in this writers room but cmon. once again a very comic-y trope and it does not work here just as much as it does not work there, though I do think going yj1998's route of having an episode dedicated to an over-the-top election full of sloppy handmade promotional merchandise where the fans get to vote for what team member they want would be an undeniable win. especially bc it would definitely go exactly how yj1998's did where a bunch of people voted for impulse despite him not being on the ballot. i want to see ninjago fandom rally around dareth as team leader it'd be great.

i definitely lost the plot there. anyway uh. fanart ideas aside. extremely correct. you are right to be bitter im right there with you. the loss of lloyd's hair (and the symbolism of him and garmadon sharing the same mold) is immense.

[constellaj]

16

Please talk more about your reboot!

16: If you could change anything in the show, what would you change?

okay so how i would re-do CANON is completely different from how i would talk abt a reboot so im gonna touch on a couple things in both contexts! the reason for the difference is canon rewrites imply i can go back in time and introduce dp fresh and new, before anyone knows what it is; but for a reboot, id be working with an audience that has a better understanding of the source material, so i dont need to spend as much time explaining, but i also need to keep everything recognizable

Valerie

REWRITE: i would def make it more danny's fault that her dad lost his job, like danny was intentionally being reckless and shattered some security stuff, and he has a whole mini lesson about learning to not just run in guns blazing. i would probably remove the dating stuff with her and danny (and tuckers crush) too, I think them wanting to be good friends is good enough for freshman year

REBOOT: the fandom already knows valerie exists, so i would actually skip the whole shades-of-gray introductory episode and have her be present as the huntress from day 1-- probably even before danny got his powers. cujo is also HER dog, and her backstory-- we'd find out in like, season 1, that a natural ghost portal (maybe one wulf opened) ripped open on her dog and killed him, and since then shes had a vendetta against ghosts cause of how reckless they are and their disregard for life-- of course, cujo isnt actually dead. cujo is a halfa. a puby halfa. anyway instead of a hoverboard she actually rides cujo around cause he can fly and its big and epic. valerie has BEEN amity parks ghost-eradicating superhero for at least a year (tho shes been in the shadows abt it) and her hatred towards danny actually just becomes really petty, like them flying next to each other chasing skulker just going "I got this. no I got this. no I got this" and they just get in each others' way and its a mutual grudge.

BOTH: i am NOT keeping in vlad giving her the suit to watch danny under any circumstances. it was only utilized half assedly in canon (when vlad couldve just had an invisible duplicate watching him instead) anyway, and I dont have any reason to keep it in a reboot either. instead i want her tech to be a combination of half-stolen and half-gerryrigged stuff and she slowly slowly learns how to build her own.

I also dont want anyone knowing her secret identity, except maybe her dad, and sam or tucker. i think it works better if danny isnt privy to this magic info

Freakshow

REWRITE: i would honestly just remove him. the episodes hes in arent particularly interesting, theyre just generic "we need a plot about x" filler and he's not compelling enough a character (at least in writing) to carry a better plot that another antagonist couldnt. i'm serious

REBOOT: unfortunately in a reboot he's gonna have to pop up somewhere or else ppl will be like "where IS HE" so I'm going to stick with running some kind of ghost circus, maybe a few occult things, but cut out a lot of the spooky magical knowledge and mcguffin stuff. maybe i could make him like, someone from vlad/jack/maddies college who always felt pushed around by them and so he has a vendetta? and theyd be the only reason he even learned abt ghosts in the first place. idk in either way I want to force him into being irredeemable but also include LYDIA (the tattoo girl ghost) way more-- I want to give her an arc that ends in her tossing freakshow aside and running off to be a ghost vigilante.

BOTH: dear god the infinity gauntlet is stupid that needs to GO AWAY. especially for the reboot cause it would exist in a post-mcu world and way too many people would complain about it

Vlad

REWRITE: amp him up to a far more sinister and villainous character. the crushing on maddie isnt enough, I want to show him on-screen performing experiments on ghosts and himself, dismissing everyone else cause he thinks hes smarter than them. i want him to be actively sabotaging the fentons at every turn. i would also clarify that he doesnt actually want danny as a son, but as a trophy-- a line where danny says something along the lines of "you don't want a son. you want a slave". i want to make him a character who wants to destroy the entire planet and put it in the ghost zone so he can be the true ghost king and i want to make this all evident from day one. if i'm writing a series villain you can bet i'm going to write a GOOD one. less petty drama here and more actual stakes.

REBOOT: it seems silly but sense with reboot we have the benefit of hindsight and recognizing that vlad wasn't a big series villain, theres no way i'd actually go back and write him to be such. for starters, of course, theres the fact that anything he does would really be an exaggerated part of the original, and it would bore an audience to see the same story again-- theres also the fact that it doesnt seem right to take a character who was treated as a joke half the time and suddenly make them big and important. no, instead for my reboot i want to lean into the petty gay uncle vibe. he had a crush on jack and now just casually insults him. he moves mansions every now and again by just haunting the family who lives in the one he wants, and taking over-- i mean, who is gonna believe that an actual ghost haunted you. he dislikes danny not because he has some concept of 'evil' and 'good' but bc danny is just too damn active. of course he actually does care about danny and his safety deep down, it's just on the surface they have very conflicting motivations-- not to mention that danny has been raised on legends from his parents of the villainous Wisconsin Ghost, who has to be stopped at all costs.

BOTH: i want jack and maddie to KNOW he's a half ghost and to actively be hunting him down for it, maybe bc they think hes possessed, or been a ghost tricking them this whole time, or the victim of a tragic lab accident who needs to be put to rest, etc. whatever the case it will give vlad actual tangible reason to despise them and genuinely suspect they dont have dannys best interests at heart. i think it would be neat if vlad was cynical and every time danny hit him with the "I'll expose us both. at least theyll still love ME" vlad could be like in the back of his head "oh god theyre going to kill this child"

Dani

REWRITE: cut her out. we don't need her character at all. maybe replace her with a more ominous shadow duplicate / clone that actually looks like danny himself and doesnt really have a name? you could probably combine her and dark dans characters for their arcs

REBOOT: instead of a clone from vlad, she's a guys in white creation using some of dannys dna after he was captured (and vlad broke him out bc he was like "ugh i guess i have to save this child")

BOTH: vlad actually cares abt her (duh), shes nonbinary (double duh), she gets the funny dissolve into goo powers

i had more i thought i was gonna write but this post is already very long and also im running out of coherency for this LUL

[twink-frank]

hi i’ve noticed the pencey prep gay conversation going on over on @awsugar and i have spent lots of time dissecting pencey prep lyrics and subjecting nathan @faggot-frank to my deranged ramblings so Here is my pencey prep super ultra mega gay lyrical analysis masterpost. it’s very long so its all under the cut but i will include a TL;DR for those who dont wanna read paragraphs of my deranged ramblings: Pencey prep uses lots of themes of: heartbreak, forbidden love, keeping love a secret, and toxic relationships. which none of that is gay on its own but combined with them almost never using gender indicators in their songs and the “nail in the coffin song” of 8th grade it ends up being a very Fruity Album.

I will be going through heart break in stereo in order and pointing out which lyrics and elements of certain songs jump out to me as Super Mega Gay and then summarizing my conclusions at the end <3

1 ) PS Don't Write

PS don't write is about leaving a toxic relationship, it has notes of moving on and leaving someone behind. "packed up all my shit / stole back all my tapes / left your spare key under the mat / this is not a joke / you'd better learn to take a hint / 'cause i'm not coming back / maybe you'll understand / when you're waking up alone / in a cold and empty bed." it has no gender indicators or pronouns which is the case in a lot of pencey prep songs, and something i'll bring up quite a bit. it also has general "coming of age" themes, something common in lots of pencey prep songs. which Yeah apply to straight people to but read in this context combined with future evidence can be pretty Fuckin Gay. "somewhere along the line / i found a hidden strength / i didn't know i had / standing on my own / cutting all the strings / that you used to control / surprise surprise / i am long gone / if you thought you could hold me down / by holding me up / you were wrong / you don't call the shots anymore." not to say only gay people can find inner strength and the room to love themselves but combined with other context it is a really poignant message about accepting yourself for who you are.

2) Yesterday

Yesterday is very repetitive and has a lot less to analyze, but the constant themes of wanting to "run away" strike me as very Fruity. once again, not saying gay people are the only people who can want to run away or escape from something But Combined With Other Context. and once again a song with no gender indicators, doesnt specify who the speaker is running away with or what they are running away from. just that they want to Leave. "i wanna run with you / i don't care what we do / gotta get out of this place / because it feels like yesterday." also saying "it feels like yesterday" could mean that the town feels backwards or old timey in its beliefs, implying homophobia. how the speaker wants to run away from an old fashioned town.

3) Don Quixote

i'm going to bring up the cultural significance of this title and literary reference first. Don Quixote is a classical novel by Cervantes which is about a crazy dude who thinks he's a knight, and goes on weird adventures with his best friend. It's typically used as a symbol of following your dreams and breaking free from what people expect of you. In the context of the song its used as a symbol of following your dreams with Someone. once again this someone is given no gender indicators. "you say it's not worth it / been burned too many times / if your spine's receding / you can borrow some of mine / don't go and quit right now / cause i'd follow you through hell." "you say so many things / and not a word of it was true / if you're still in that state of mind / i'd still vacation inside of you / cause i think you're worth every minute / and every dime that i spend / i'd spend all my time fighting dragons / just to keep you alive and talking." it's about wanting to spend time with someone, wanting to be with them no matter what. and its also about how this person feels unreachable, like being with them would be a fairytail but the speaker Still Reaches for it. "your imaginations running wild / round your deceptive heart / this is my crusade / and you're the unreachable star / but i'm reaching." talking about this person being unreachable and unattainble. which isnt gay By Itself  but again combined with the other context. FRUIT BEHAVIOR.

4) 10 Rings

another breakup song once again with no gender indicators, are you guys sensing a theme here? anyways this song is about someone cutting you off and then coming back suddenly wanting to talk again after breaking your heart. it has a sense of forbidden love, like this person Told the speaker they cant be together for Whatever Reason ;] and is now trying to come back and repair their mistake when the speaker is already hurt and reeling. "learn to live with decisions you make / i learned things from the break i can't forget / catch you doing drive-bys at 1 AM / it must kill you to know we can't be friends." "end of the summer you cut me off / i cut you out all the pictures i have." which this Isnt Gay By Itself. but bringing that phrase back with other context this is such a uniquely gay experience. being in love with someone and they cut you off Because theyre weirded out by that and then they try to come back, convince you it meant nothing.

5) The Secret Goldfish

my FAVORITE pencey song. this one has a lot. it's another breakup song about heartbreak and loss and im not even gonna dwell on the no gender indicators because yall see the theme now. it has themes of heartbreak and losing someone who is very close to you and having to let go of them and having to accept that this person cant be yours and you cant be with them. "land of the lost / i found myself in nothing / this time, promises broken find me / clutching to you for something / something that you're not / believing in what you say / it makes me lie awake at night / the truth, the truth is not what scares me / it's why you have to lie / all the time." here we see these themes of having to let someone go because they just Aren't The Same as you. "clutching to you for something / something that you're not." maybe like chasing after a straight boy and getting rejected? also the repetition of "heartbreak is forever" when you're young and gay losing that first person you felt some kind of love and attraction to can feel like the end of the world and can be a huge deal because of the lack of representation and guidance young gays get. and the themes of nothing lasting forever, the fact that gay people never get promised eternal love the same way straight people do.

6) 8th Grade

this song is the nail in penceys fucking coffin honestly. the rest of these songs have a lot of plausible deniability, just vague enough to maybe Not Be Gay. but framed in the context of 8th grade they all start to get a lil fruity. Im just gonna go through lyric by lyric for this one. "caught staring again / like a deer in the headlights / when you can't move fast enough / i take a hit for the team / pretty girl is blushing / i can't tell if she's disgusted / laughter starts to swell / someone gets the joke." this kid was staring at some cute boy ass and got caught and everyone is laughing at him for being gay. the "pretty girl" here is what most people think he's staring at but with the rest of the song it's obvious she's not the one he's looking at. "bells ring, i make my escape / helps a little, but doesn't save / beat downs a common thing / with us every day / maybe im just strange / cause i dont change schools / so maybe i like the abuse / or maybe i just like you." literally This is the nail in penceys fucking coffin. "maybe i like the abuse or maybe i just like you." this kid purposefully takes beatings from his bully who is Obviously male if you take into context the next verse. because he Likes Him. "maybe im just strange / cause i dont change schools" literally willingly taking beatings from his bully bc he has a crush. "another confrontation / you've got something to prove / your girl can't tell how tough you are / when you beat me up in the boys room." this just confirms that the subject of the song is a boy, and a tough macho boy with something to prove. maybe also hiding his own internalized homophobia through bullying? "well i made a big mistake / but i can't help who i like / this may not cost my life / but i am branded forever lame." LITERALLY ITS RIGHT IN YOUR FACE. "can't help who i like" "branded forever lame" do i even need to fucking explain this oh my god. he got outed as gay, he Can't Help Who He Likes and is now branded forever as "the gay kid." the rest of the song is general "im gonna get back at my bully" stuff but literally THIS. THIS is the song that brands all penceys other very vague songs as 100% verified super mega ultra gay.

7) 19

this song has a lot less, and is more about internal struggle than anything. but it is the only song with a "she" pronoun in it. but there is one thing i wanna mention. "I scream out loud / but no one hears a sound / i take my life with lack of sleep / i believe the things i feel / the things i see are fooling only me." this song is about not believing what the world shows you, believing what you think is true in your heart and what You feel. not what anyone else tells you. which is a gay experience. believing in yourself and your heart and your feelings, believing theyre right and theyre true and valid. Also this song has a significance in coming right after 8th grade on the album, going from being 13 to 19, from being unsure in your feelings and angry about the people who dont like you to lost and hopeless but somewhat grounded in yourself.

8) Trying To Escape The Inevitable

this song is about an abusive and toxic relationship, knowing you Need to escape it but being so infatuated with the person you literally cant. “i have this reoccurring dream / you make it hard for me to breathe / i gave you everything i could / i gave up everything i owned / and when you smile it’s not for me / you offer little sympathy / your grasp so far exceeds your reach / i wake up, this is not a dream.” “i have this reoccuring dream / where you admit that you’re not happy / i know that you will never leave / you’re here just to torment me.” which like again this isnt an exclusively gay experience but it is very interesting when framed that way. in that gay people are way more likely to throw themselves into abusive and toxic relationships because they dont feel like they can get anybody else. the repetition of “i know i should run” makes it seem like the speaker Knows he should get out but he just Cant because what if he never finds love again? and the little reprise in the middle “i have a new dream / and everything is perfect / the sky is pink, yellow, green, blue, and orange / and all the past has been forgotten / and we fell in love / and we fell in love / and we fell in love / and i fell into your trap.” implying that even if he escapes, even in his dreams he still falls for this person because he feels like he cant have anything else.

9) Lloyd Dobbler

another love song about wanting to have someone but not being able to because of Unspecified Forbidden Reasons. “why are you so far away / even when you’re standing next to me? / your eyes give you away / telling secrets your mouht don’t feel like talking.” falling in love with someone, maybe sensing that they like you too. that they Are Like You and that they have a Secret they dont want to vocalize. do i even need to explain it at this point? and in the chorus “That I’ll be your lloyd dobbler / with a boom box out in the street / and i’ll be there if you need someone / even if he isn’t me.” saying you’ll be there for someone even if that person isn’t you, also the use of Pronouns which is big for pencey prep. which yes the use of “even if he isnt me” could imply a straight girl ooorrr....Fruit Behavior. also this line “There’s a norman rockewll painting / of two kids sitting on a bench / it reminds me of all the stupid things / i’d like for us to share, but i dont care.” normal rockwell is a painter that paints traditionally “american” scenes. like the american ideal, that maybe he wants with this person. but he knows he cant have, but its stupid and domestic and he wants it but he Cant Have It because of FRUIT BEHAVIOR.

10) Florida Plates

another of my favorite pencey songs, and this one brings back those tragic “love but we cant have it” themes, except with a more somber tone. instead of being angry or resentful or spiteful in the face of adversity. its an Acceptance, of what they had and how good it was and how it just Cant Last. “kiss a mouth to open eyes / stall one last moment before goodbye / drive in different cars in different directions / never write all the letters full of good words, better intentions / it’s for the best although we don’t know it / paper words will cheapen the moments we shared / it’s better if i say nothing at all.” it’s about knowing you have to leave someone, even if having them in the moment is great they Can’t Stay and you can’t even talk or write about the moments you had. which do i even need to explain it at this point? forbidden love, not being able to have each other, not even being able to Talk about it. its a secret, and painful one but its beautiful while you have it. Conclusion alright!!! thank you so so much if you read all the way through that i Know it was long i Know it was a lot of repetition but i wanted to make my point. pencey prep has very big gay themes in their music. with forbidden love, letting go, heartbreak, keeping secrets, toxic realtionships. which none of it is gay on its own but in the context of: almost none of the songs having clear gender indicators and always speaking really vaguely about the subject and Eight Grade the “nail in the coffin song” you can see my point thank you and goodnight.

[pixieswashere]

First off, I agree with everything with what OP said here. I want to also add onto this that it makes no sense for AU!Jinx/Powder not to have her mental illness/psychosis, not only bc of the fact she had it since she was a child....but also bc in that universe.....Vi is dead...like SHE IS GONE. If anything the trauma and psychosis would still be there, if not worsen overtime.

Like at first when I started it, I didn't think much thinking that in this universe she had professionall help in coping with it healthily.....but then the Vi reveal and the fact we didnt see her having some hallucinations or voices is what ruined this......her ONLY last remaining family to her parents and who was very close to her clearly...is DEAD. Jinx loved her sister so much and had a mental breakdown as a kid when she LEFT her to go and find Vander. The only person who was there that BELIEVED in her, STUCK up for her, and practically raised her along Vander. You're telling me, Jinx wouldn't have any slightest of a breakdown or crisis over that??? At all??? Even when considering her mental state???

Adding to this for Viktor (bc I love him and I 100% agree that his character was fumbled)

Viktor NEVER hated himself in s1 let's get that straight. In S1, he makes a very big POINT to show that he has always carried himself and that in whatever he does, he is proud of it because he believed in himself enough to accept who he is and DOESN'T care about what others think of him

"When you're going to change the world don't ask for permission."

"I didn't have the benefits of a patron or a name, I simply....BELIEVED in MYSELF."

You could argue that while yes he is self-assured and confident, he still has some insecurities of how people close to him perceive him....and that could be true, but it's not really ever alluded. He DOES care about making connections but hes isolated himself bc of these judgements that its almost second nature if not a rarity. But he does value companionship, its just not something he is accustomed to a degree, and he sometimes without consideration distances himself from it if it gets in the way of his aspirations (Ex: Sky/Jayce, Heimerdinger/Singed.) In the latter acts of S1 he was DYING he wasn't hating himself because of his "terminal illness" that was killing him or his disability....He was in a vulnerable and solemn state because he felt like his accomplishments meant or achieved NOTHING. This is a character that is selfless, altruistic and a workaholic who worked his way up with dreams of something better and now after so many years in developing Hextech he's seeing that what he strived to achieve for the improvement of his home that's also DYING because of Piltover's ignorance and oppression, is unable to do NOTHING about it now.

He is angry that he has no CONTROL over his fate and the assuredness of his Legacy = helping those in need for the Undercity because of Jayce and Piltover's lack of understanding, especially after they had complied building the Hexgates for their trade disputes first.....over the disputes of lives. Viktor has contemplated death because he knows time is fleeting and he wants to make it count for something good, he doesnt want to be remembered as PERFECT, he wants to be remembered in the contributions that the people of Zaun will FINALLY heal/be helped after so long and not have to live short lives bc of unsafe work environments, manual labour, illnesses cause by toxic chemicals and etc.

He even brushes the idea of when he'll die off, and you could even add that he is ticked off by the fact that hes now being perceived as a "dead man" before he even died (Ex. Heimerdinger convo and Jayce in the hospital, etc). He doesn't like being seen as powerless or as his terminal illness now because he ISN'T and never was. Furthermore, he doesnt use the Hexcore to "PERFECT" himself, he's using it to heal himself of his terminal illness/expand his lifespan so that he can continue his research in helping Zaun.

If he is going to use Hexcore, he needs to make sure that it will work. So, to tests its capabilities, he tests it on HIMSELF. Only to find out that the same thing he created to HEAL ended up killing someone that meant a lot to him. He wasted NO TIME telling Jayce to destroy it bc it harmed someone and he finally realizes that ensuring a legacy = saving people....ended up at the cost of harming people in return.

P.s. sorry this was long. Hope you enjoyed reading it if u did !

I don't have perfect thoughts on it, but I do want to note that I'm not loving how Arcane handles disability.

Viktor hating his disability so deeply, feeling that it needs to be "fixed" so thoroughly, that he succumbs to ~ultimate eugenics for everyone ~ ?????? fucked up

Jinx's psychosis being a manifestation of her being "unhinged" and encouraging her to act out either to challenge or appease them, and then her psychosis magically disappearing in the "perfect" universe????? also fucked up

Vi's alcoholism and (albeit mild) psychotic symptoms never being brought up....ever???? just created as fodder to make her a more angsty and submissive lapdog to facism????? also also fucked up

Let me have my mad/cripple characters who have their shit recognized as parts of their humanity rather than trauma porn plot or things that need to be corrected or traits indicative of rash violence please

[chidoroki]

TPN ch181

(spoilers! AAAHHhhaha..my children!)

Okay, so remember in my last review when I said I was impressed how Ray, Gilda and Phil managed to narrow down where Emma might be in the matter of a couple months? Well, I take it back because it hasnt been just a few months, it's been two damn years! Oh my god, I can't imagine how hard it must've been for everyone, especially our two boys, to search for so long without even getting on single clue about Emma's whereabouts. Some of the children still doubt whether she's alive or actually in this world with them or not.

(image limit, so imagine the panels of the Goldy Pond kids discussing the lack of clues and Thoma and Lani doubting the reward again)

Thankfully, Gilda gets the idea to search in forbidden zones which is where we see her, Ray and Phil. Speaking of which, oh my poor boy. This is the longest Ray has been without Emma by his side. I thought the one month after Goldy Pond was hard enough on him, but two whole years? Damn, I can't imagine the stress and anxiety he's been experiencing. He's still so frustrated too and gets so close to Emma without even realizing it. Then, surprisingly, his beloved family steps in to help? The people he personally couldn't save now come together to help him save the one person who originally saved his life. Like, hello?? I love this! Conny, who was another sibling he had to use in order to put his initial escape plan in motion to save Emma and Norman's lives, is now assisting him in saving Emma from being alone. Yuugo, who knows firsthand how important Emma is to Ray and how close they are. Isabella, knowing her son kept his promise as he's always set out to do whatever it takes to protect his entire family. The fact that Ray's lost family members can feel how strong his bond with Emma is and they jump in to help reconnect the two of them again.. just, wow. It may be all the rayemma week feels getting to me but that's like a damn soulmate occurrence if i ever saw one!

The two unknowingly pass each other again but thanks to Emma conveniently losing her necklace and finding it with perfect timing, they all finally encounter each other. Everyone expresses their complete shock and relief that they had finally found Emma, and while I am happy they their search ended up a success, the mood changes fairly quickly due to our girls lost memories. She hasnt the slightest idea who "Emma" is, who these people are or why they're so excited to see her. The kids wonder if they have the right girl, as they take notice of Emma's bare neck.

One look at the necklace in her hand though and Ray finally puts the pieces together. Honestly, I'm not at all surprised he's the one to figure out the true reward, as Ray has been very perceptive since the beginning. He's also always been openly honest and blunt when things get serious, so naturally he's the one who has to let everyone know this because while it's a sad truth no one wants to hear, or even believe, they all need to realize it, including Emma. Even Ray has trouble coming to terms with the sacrifice Emma made. He understands how hard it must have been for Emma to accept the heavy price of her forgetting the family she loves so deeply and he looks so broken when he realizes that. He must be feeling so guilty that he couldn't have been there with her when she made the new promise. He still puts the blame on himself and he's so upset that his failure lead Emma to live in a world alone without the family she cares for more than anything.

I wasn't too satisfied last chapter when demon god told us the real reward and Emma's response was a simple "okay," so I'm grateful we learned more about the conversation now in this chapter. She really did want to live her family. She even knew some of them might get mad at her for keeping a secret. She says it's a selfish request, for her to place such a heavy burden on herself, but what mattered to her back then upon accepting the reward is what has always mattered to her, and that's her family's happiness and safety. It wasn't just her loved one either, but for all the demons and cattle children. This girl truly has a heart of gold and demon god himself is left surprised. Of course I wish she didn't think she was being selfish since everyone did agree to follow her as their leader but aahh.. my poor girl.

Spoiling the very end now, but we dont get one last fullscore trio hug. Of course that upsets me since I thought it would've made such a perfect ending, but it makes sense now given how everyone's reunion with Emma happened. While their happiness and relief is completely understandable after searching two years and finally finding Emma, they overreact and this visibly freaks her out. Come on guys, last time I said to gently remind her of her past, not bombard her right away. Having a ton of strangers surround you and tell you such outlandish things is quite jarring. I'm glad she takes the chance to listen to everyone, but she just doesnt know these people well enough to suddenly hug them. I imagined a hug would've happened upon her recalling some of her memories somehow and feeling relived that she met the two boys she often once dreamt about, but oh well.

Norman takes this time to step in and ease some of the tension, saying how happy he is that Emma's alive and even reiterating some of the things he said to her during his shipment scene. While this chapter soon shows how well the escapees have adapted to the human world and changed, it also puts an emphasis on the boy's true personalities that they showed since the very beginning. I've already mentioned above how Ray stayed true to himself, about him being open and honest to the others with the truth and even his own feelings. With Norman, I don't know the word for him really, but his speech about their family and his feelings remind me of ch1/ep1 where we see him trying to calm Emma down after seeing what they did at the gate. He stayed by her side and remained hopeful even though he was just as scared. Right now, I get the same vibes. He's just as upset as their family upon learning Emma lost her memories, but he still wants her to be apart of their family.

Although it seems like a very rushed way of tying up loose ends, I'm happy to hear about how well the children have been adapting in the human world. They're attending school and following their passions. They all look so happy! The entire Lambda crew is healthy and Cislo even has a prosthetic leg! The medicine made from Adam's dna was successful and also helped those children from the mass production farms. Mike Ratri and the clan are actually being helpful and trustworthy. I absolutely love Norman's comment about Ayshe not killing him! It really makes me smile and I assume that means she's forgiven him.. maybe. Her dogs were indeed able to cross over to the human world too and now there's even more! Chris is finally awake! They seriously have to fill the poor boy in on so much news though.

I get it. It took the entire story for me to understand but now I get Norman's intense feelings. He's been infatuated by this girl since childhood. He told us/Ray his feelings at age 11 then "gave his life" to give her a better chance at survival. He kept living just for the slight possibly to see her again. After almost two years, they reunite, only for about a week or two before they all cross over into the human world and Emma is no where to be seen. Another two years pass and while they all find her, she's almost a completely difference person. Yet Norman's feelings remain so sincere for her that he accepts this new Emma. He lets her know that the bright future she wished for came true. (me? speaking of noremma? even im surprised)

Her head might not have the slightest idea who these people are, but her heart surely remembers! Emma's feelings for her family were so strong that they persisted throughout these entire two years, even after she stopped having those dreams about them. Deep down, and without even realizing it, she loves them so much that it makes her cry.

“Why am I... Even though I don't know them. Though I don't know anything. Though I can't remember. Why... Does it feel warm, but also so painful in my heart? I wanted to see you.”

Seeing everyone else get emotional and expressing their feelings to her right back and having all of them accept this new Emma.. yeah, that has me in tears! Demon god truly underestimated these kids and how deep their love for each other went. Emma's family was never going to give up looking for her because, thanks to her influence, they also didn't believe anything was impossible. “Screw destiny” indeed! (also we never did learn the old dude's name or Emma's new one hm? odd.)

Did Emma get her memories back? No. Did Ray pat her head again so I could die from nostalgia? No, because I'm still here. Did we get a fullscore hug like I originally hoped? No, sadly. The ending isn't picture perfect but honestly, this is still okay. Our precious girl is finally reunited with her family again. Most importantly, they're alive. The trio are teenagers about 15/16 years old now, which amazing since they once believed they wouldn't see a day past the age of 12. Yet here they are, living happy and free in the human world without fear and killing, which is exactly what Emma wished for.

I can't believe the manga is truly finished. It feels like it all went by so quick, but perhaps that's only because I haven't been in the fandom as long as others, like if you've been here since the manga started then I applaud you and can't imagine how sad this must be after four years. The anime is what caught my attention and my love for this series only grew when I jumped into the manga right after season one ended. I must have binged all available chapters at the time in like three days, all the way up to ch129. Since then I've waited patiently week after week to see how this suspenseful story would pan out for out lovable and very large cast of characters. Each new twist and cliffhanger made my brain crazy and stressed me out but it was so great to experience them with everyone.

Also, big thanks to all of you who share your comments on these reviews of mine! Even though I started writing them pretty late into the story and at the most stressful time, it was great to hear so much feedback and experience the exciting finish with everyone. The manga may have ended, but don't let that make the fandom quiet! We still have future manga volume releases to look forward to, the live-action movie that is still set for this December along with a live-action series that was also recently announced. Most importantly, season two of the anime is still scheduled for January 2021! You can bet I'll do reactions for each episode as I normally do with other anime! The series still has so much more content to give us, especially if the anime continues to recieve future seasons over the upcoming years, so of course I'll give my thoughts on all that I can.

I give all my thanks and appreciation to Shirai & Demizu for such a wonderful and suspenseful story, for all the memorable characters and the stunning artwork. The series has truly become my favorite. That's right, I said it! My favorite. TPN has taken over Black Lagoon as my favorite series. (Revy can still keep her spot as my favorite character but I'll be damned if Ray isn't a really really close second.)