#another thing i noted in my brain.. done
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i could eat your heart out baby â„
#digital art#my art#fanart#dead plate#dead plate art#dead plate fanart#dead plate game#another thing i noted in my brain.. done#i shall rest now#idk how to make curved text around a silhouette so i just gave up#i think it wouldve looked way better but ehh here we go#dead plate rody#dead plate vincent#vincent dead plate#rody dead plate#vincent charbonneau#rody lamoree
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any time something goes wrong, any time whumper wants to hurt someone that they donât have access to, they hurt whumpee insteadâ taking all their anger out on them, making them beg and apologize for whatever that other person did that pissed whumper off.
#things I find in my notes app#whump scenario#whump prompt#dirt brain thoughts#abused whumpee#physical abuse#violence#tw violence#broken whumpee#conditioned whumpee#ok iâm done tagging#I have another scenario but I write all this shit in first person so uhhhh#we gonna have to go in and edit the tense so I donât get swatted 0.0#akia.txt
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i donât know if anything will beat the feeling i had during april 2020. i was heavily hyperfixated on tss and especially the creativitwins, and then thomas dropped the roman playlist. to this day 3 years later i still think about it
second song on that playlist was wonderboy by tenacious d and i was immediately like âhaha that sounds like thatâs about remus. cool how they team up in the endâ but oh well, i didnât think that much about it in that moment. the song can easily be about virgil too
iâm vibing to the rest of the songs and then humility by gorillaz comes on and. did the song straight up say twin??? bro that fucking song is about remus. that song is about remus there is no way around it.
iâm not smart enough to directly analyze the songs (plenty of people have already done so. hereâs my favorite one) but all i can say is holy fuck yippie doodle this shit still makes me ballistic.
i mean in the series all roman seems to show is hate for remus!! looking at remus is like looking into a funhouse mirror, heâs literally his biggest insecurity, his biggest fear. and yet, (correct me if iâm wrong) i donât even think thereâs a song on there that even implies his hatred of remus. the playlist is all about how he wants to be free of his morality restrictions..
idek man. if the day comes in 2050 when the creativitwins reconcile i will be there in the first row.
oh and also. fun fact about the wonderboy song (and also the entire roman playlist)? thomas and joan purposefully made romanâs playlist into 5 sections: i want songs, character establishment, rising action, climax, and falling action. they didnât specify how exactly these sections were split up* but that doesnât even matter. wonderboy is the SECOND song in the playlist, meaning itâs definitely an I Want song. do with this information what you will
*ok if you want my opinion, theres 20 songs, and 5 sections. the math would show that each section would consist of 4 songs, and i think this definitely holds up with the vibes of the songs, too.
conclusion: ieirjrwndijekwfowhhdeh idk. roman and remus are the twins ever and the only main reason i still care about sanders sides after all this time.
#roman sanders#remus sanders#sanders sides#creativitwins#side tracks#perry posts#btw iâm sorry for not really talking about remusâ perspective here. he has similar sentiments in his playlist too#see: tranz by gorillaz#i didnât rlly talk about it in this post mainly bc iirc he hasnât been shown to Hate roman in the show#like i donât rlly think remus likes roman but i canât remember anything heâs done that canât be excused by âremus thingsâ and cain instinct#idk. if u have Thoughts about remusâ perspective (or anything abt this post) please feel free to add on to this#i feel like the playlists are the only place where all the sides have Finished Arcs. sad.#note: i havenât watched anything past that 5 Year Anniversary video in 2021 so idk what those guys are up to in those asides and ad videos#iâll catch up if the finale comes out (or if they put remus in rswr thereâs so much potential with that but thatâs another post)#edit: i fucking caved and watched the fucking ads and asides. and despite the um. mediocre (to say it nicely) writing at timesâŠ#my dumb brain is hyperfixating so iâm back. got more thoughts about these fuckers than ever <3#âif u have thoughts about remusâ perspective please add onâ GIRL I JUST MIGHT I GOT SO MANY
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I have to ask about good dog bad dream <3
đ„°đ„° oh i was HOPING for this one. ok so yâall may actually know a little bit already because it exists in the tags as tyler borzoituzzi but! good dog bad dream is the working document title/notes compilation for a fic that started with the premise of âwell you see thatâs actually not a dog thatâs my blorbo from my hrpf shifter wolf auââ
and, because i have never formally addressed it or put it anywhere other than the tags, three important details about this fic:
this IS a semi-au fic about the detroit red wings, set vaguely in the 2018-19 season, because the wings sucked that year (but not as bad as 2019-20)
this is ALSO a fic that is mainly about tyler bertuzzi and dylan larkin, with some other wings thrown in because i've never met an ensemble i couldn't shove into a love story
this 100% exists because of mickey redmond calling tyler a junkyard dog every chance he gets and me every time going "okay but what if literally though" -> đș
#me đ€ the detroit red wings hippo campus hive mind#liv in the replies#the way that this fic exists fully formed in my brain & i just need it!!! to come out as a narrative!!!#where is the brainworm to print fic button. where is it#also the way in which iâm just like âyeah the fic is tyler borzoituzziâ ok but can we have a title please. like a real one.#because somehow out of 20 pages of bertuzzi-thesis-dog-related quotes i have not found a title. ???? help. i also have a whole titles note#for just collecting phrases to use as titles (sometimes with specific ideas sometimes just vibes sometimes like oh i like that phrase)#not to mention the fact that my quote doc for the bertuzzi thesis has a more embarrassing title but like itâs fine!!#UPDATE THE DOC HAS ACTUAL WRITING IN IT đšđš I REPEAT WE HAVE REAL NARRATIVE NOT TAG NOT!FIC#WE ARE AT A SOLID ALMOST 1K!!! THIS IS THANKS TO YâALL!!! donât ask how long the document with notes is tho. also how many scenes are done đ#anyway i have had this reply written for like two days but keep not posting it because i wanted to be able to have something written to give#but also thereâs another ask about good dog bad dream so this one will be info (boring) (sorry) and i will post a snippet in the next ask <3#me vs not wanting to spoil things vs literally the entire plot of this already written out in the tags: fight#tyler borzoituzzi#WAIT MY TAGS DIDNâT SAVE đđđ#youâre missing the one of me going âđ„șđ„°âșïžđđâŒïžđ„č thank you for the askâ#lmaooo tumblr out here like âbro you canât do that every time someone sends an askâ ok well watch me. what if i DO cherish every interaction#wip ask game
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deleted youtube off my phone again, maybe it will stick this time. started duolingo japanese again, maybe it will stick this time. started doing math problems to relearn calc and physics, maybe it will stick this time. am going to the gym in the morning (psyched myself out this morning worried about time so I didn't go today), maybe it will stick this time. been working on keeping a clean kitchen, maybe it will stick this time. tried to get healthy(er) groceries yesterday, maybe it will stick this time. have actually read multiple books this year, maybe it will stick this time.... this isn't just a me problem right??? I feel like I am constantly spiraling around the things I want to do and never actually sticking to them. It's kind of exhausting.
#i am sitting at work daydreaming about running off to another country or making these huge wild changes and becoming my ideal dream self#but the thing is so much of that person is just 'does the things i say i am going to do'#or 'doesn't procrastinate on life' or other similar things#ACTUALLY writing that out I paused to make a car appointment I've needed to make for like 2 months so I am trying ya know#I gave myself a sticker for it next to the appointment note in my planner cause I have the same reward system as a 3 year old lol#but like... I could have gotten rid of all the stress and had this over and done with three months ago if I had done it then!!#instead it haunted me for Months....#and literally everything I want to do to become that dream self is all achievable stuff!! nothing I have listed is outrageous or crazy#it's just don't procrastinate. work on my brain and body. don't spend 8 hours a day on my phone. (if you break it all down)#THATS NOT HARD STUFF WHY DO I KEEP FAILING AT IT
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guys were sooo back i even made a todo list for this weekend n im quite confident its doable :33
#like my problem with todo lists is that i wanna get EVERYTHING done so i strongly overestimate how much stuff im physically capable of doing#which means im not completing my goals which makes me disappointed and discourages me from working further -_-#but now im like iknow this thing is gonna take up all my productive hours in a day so its ok to plan just this one thing for the day#<- silly as it sounds but productive hours a day is another concept im learning. like who cares if theres 24h a day if i know that#i can do intelectually demanding work for like. a total of 6 hours at best. obv excluding breaks etc#but if i try to make my total studying time longer i know ill start feeling like my brains boiling inside my skull#thats another weird thing ive realised recently. mental exhaustion is literally a palpable physical feeling#idk why i find it suprising since the brain is literally another bodily organ so it makes sense it tired similarly#alright sorry for rambly tags i rly need to get that journal. back to the notes !#thots
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Flossing my teeth and getting in the gums like Yes I'm going to get a good grade in dental care. Which is normal to want and possible to achieve.
#speculation nation#every time i go to the dentist they tell me to floss and every time i have not kept up with it#this time tho. im trying. ive only missed one day so far. since tuesday.#they said ive got some gum loss on my right side since half a year ago :(((#but i can fix it. and so i will. so im flossing my teeth. and when it gets here i'll use the mouth wash they recommended.#the whole deal. full dental hygiene. not gonna lose any teeth in MY 30s no sir!!!!!#managed to get myself on a good brushing schedule. with an electric toothbrush!!!#used to be id often skip evening bc i was too tired. but now it's part of the whole routine. i gotta do it.#it's a thing of like. i always go pee before bed bc i have a small bladder and i'll wake up to go pee if i dont go before bed.#and so i go to the bathroom then i wash my hands and when im at the sink right then. hands still wet. i brush my teeth.#and see this makes flossing harder. bc well flossing should be done before brushing. but i need dry hands for it.#so it cant be a part of the bathroom evening routine. so well how do i remember to do it??#ive had my floss set up where i sit to watch tv and game so that i can floss in the evening while watching shit#i think im gonna put up another post it note on the tv. i put one up for remembering my vitamins and it does help#doesnt make me remember all the time. sometimes i dont remember if ive taken them or not. so i end up not.#but it does help. look @ the side of the tv and see 'Did you take your vitamins?' and im like no sir i have not! thank you for the reminder!#and if i put one for flossing then itll be in my brain more consistently. and thus i will remember it more readily.#mouth wash is fine. i can do that after brushing. evening routine secured.#now u may ask why i cant just dry my hands before flossing after using the bathroom. and well that wouldnt WORK.#it'd still be slippery and see the key to evening brushing is to just do it automatically. hands are wet its evening lets brush now#ive had it happen before where im getting ready for bed but im like 'ok not brushing Yet... gonna eat a quick snack first'#but im at that sink and im zoned out and suddenly i have a toothbrush in my mouth. and im just like Drat.#just gotta. just gotta hack the system. ok see theres a system and i just gotta hack it.#i will get to the good dental hygiene. i really do not want to lose my teeth young đđđđđ
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hey i really really love your fics and the way you write youre so talented! ive been searching for a virgin!yuji x virgin!reader for so long and my life would literally be urs if you wrote this. if not no worries, i totally get it.
sending love! - anon
OH THIS IDEA IS HOOOOTTTTT AND U BEST BELIEVE IM ALL OVER IT!! thank you for your sweet words and for sending in a request!! i hope you like it!! :] <333
ââ©â§âËౚà§Ëââ©â§â
oh my god, pretty!
{yuji itadori x f!reader}
summary: your relationship with yuji was semi new and cute, you both absolutely adoring the fuck out of one another since the moment you met. one thing you have in common though? youâre both loser virgins with absolutely no experience whatsoever, and on one night where youâre both innocently cuddling on the couch watching a movieâ yuji goes NUTS.
warnings: MDNI. college!au, afab!reader, SMUT, p in v sex, unprotected sex (wrap it yaâll), accidental creampie LOL, yuji is a little perv, smut with barely any plot she goes straight to the good stuff, cursing, pet names, fluff, FILTHYYYY this is filthy, all characters are aged up.
word count: 3.9k
authors note: PHEEWWWW THIS ONE HAD ME MEOWING LIKE A KITTY CAT AND I HOPE YALL MEOW WITH ME!!! thank you for your support always, that is an absolute given, i love you and i love you forever. MWAAAHHHH <3333
ââ©â§âËౚà§Ëââ©â§âââ©â§âËౚà§Ëââ©â§âââ©â§âËౚà§Ëââ©â§âââ©â§âËౚà§Ëââ©â§âââ©â§â
âare you okay baby?â
no you were not.
because yuji was in a black tight compression tee and pjâs while you both were watching a movie together and cuddling on your living room couch, the sleeves of his shirt accentuating his biceps and the rest of it squeezing over his pecs and torso, the brightness of your tv illuminating all of his sharp handsome features that had you gnawing at your nails in a nervous fitâ him looking at you with pinched eyebrows.
yuji and you had just started dating a couple of months agoâ his lively overly friendly personality winning you over without really much effort at all, and your genuine sweet one catching his heart the minute he saw you come into one of his lectures last year, looking soul killingly beautiful and radiant, the both of you befriending each other quickly as your interests aligned.
and you started hanging out on and off campus a lot more frequently after thatâ gradually falling more and more in love until yuji finally gathered up his jumpy nerves and asked you to be his girlfriend.
there was a problem though.
neither of you had had sex before, or had done anything in between the lines with other people before you got together.
it was the first thing that yuji worried about when he first started dating youâ embarrassed and afraid that you would think he was a big fat loser with no game and that he would potentially run the risk of losing you, you maybe preferring a man of experience to match your own needs.
but when he admitted that to you, and when you shook your worried little head and told him you were in the same exact boat as him, he was fucking elatedâ his apprehensions crumbling down like a landslide and replaced instead with the giddiness of getting to do stuff with you for the first time ever, and him being the man (the only man ever he hoped) to get to do it to you.
but then there was another problem.
neither of you seemed to want to start anything, the both of you hesitant and scared because of your lack of experienceâ petrified of humiliating yourselves if one of you tried and pathetically failed at it or did something incorrectly.
âmhm! fine.â you smiled sweetly, your calm voice a completely different contrast to what was currently happening inside your reeling fuzzy brain.
you had both definitely talked about it, the subject of intimacy. but it was always something that the two of you reassured each other would happen eventually when you were both ready, that there was no rushâ choosing to brush the subject off like it was nothing.
except it wasnât nothing. it was never nothing. and you were both way past fucking ready, especially yuji, him practically ripping apart at the seams with horn dog need anytime he saw you wear those little skirts that you like so much, or whenever youâd straddle his lap during one of your daily makeout sessionsâ his hands literally trembling over your ass in attempts at being respectful of pretty olâ you, settling for placing them on your upper back instead.
and you would internally pout, disappointed, because you always without fail noticed all of this yet you were too shy to mention anything or do something about it on your own.
âyou sure?â he asked softly. âyou look like youâre thinking about something.â
he raised a hand and gently poked your cheek repeatedly with his index finger, a silly smile on his face. âtell me baby tell me baby tell me babyââ
you giggled, âiâm okay! just zoned out.â you pushed his finger away, leaning up and pressing a quick shy kiss to his cheek that made him instantly flush pink in return, a wobbly smile spreading across his face.
in the midst of you retreating back to your previous position, yuji caught your chin with his fingers and turned you to look at him, your cheeks blushing as he stared at you with lovesick dreamy eyes.
âcan weâ um.â his gaze flickered to your lips. âcan we make out.â
your eyes widened slightly and your hands grew clammy fast, cheeks buzzing as you stared back at him.
since making out was the only thing you both properly conquered, it happened almost every single time you saw each other, the act practically filling in and making up for the more lewd exchanges you both were missing out on, your kisses always sloppy and messy but heatedâ though each time it came around to it you were often just as nervous as the first time.
âsâsure!â you stammered. âyou donât have to ask me yuji⊠you can justâ yâknow⊠do it..â
he bit his tongue, your timidness for some fucking reason sending a shock of arousal through his veins and straight down to his dick as he tried his best to swallow it and not make it obvious for you.
âokay!â
he brought your face closer then and kissed you, a solid one at first, until you slowly parted your lips and ushered him in, deeper, your body moving closer to his on its own as he immediately responded with placing a hand on your leg to throw it over his lap, your mouths wet and slippery as he properly settled you to sit on him.
you wrapped your arms around his neck, the movie drowned out completely in the background as a sequence of lip smackings echoed throughout the room, yujiâs hands on your upper back like always as you continued to make out⊠until you felt a little stinging cramp in your kneeâ moving your hips a little bit to readjust, utterly unaware of how you accidentally applied pressure over yujiâs crotch as he sucked in a breath through his nose and pulled away.
âfuck donât do that baby donât do that.â
you froze, hands quickly retracting back to your chest. âwhat? what do what?â
âohââ he froze, eyes wide and cheeks pink as his mouth opened and closed like a fishy out of water.
he couldnât possibly tell you why, not wanting to scare you away by admitting that you grinding down on his crotch like that made his dick jerk and mind haze in the most filthy and perverted way imaginable, feeling like he wanted to dig himself a big fat grave of horny shame to throw himself into as he watched your pretty eyes look at him the way that they were, wanting that same look but underneath him insteadâ
your bent knee cramped up once more and you hissed, moving your hips again except this time harder, yujiâs eyes flying open as the grip around your upper torso tightened, a strangled whiny hum escaping his throat.
your eyes snapped to his at the sound, now feeling something hard poking your clothed pussy as your brain finally put fucking two and two together, your hand slapping over your mouth in embarrassment at what you did and over your stupid delayed realization.
âoh! yuji iâm so sorry iâ i didnât realizeââ
he shook his head rapidly, his cheeks and ears red as he shakily smoothed his hands over your hips comfortingly.
âno baby! donât be sorry itâs okay!â he quickly kissed your forehead. âiâitâs me⊠itâs not you at allâŠâ
but there was something else behind his eyes, something you couldnât quite pinpoint as he just stared at the place where your body met his crotch, hands slowly gripping your hips tighter in a certain way and⊠and actually moving you now in a certain way that made you promptly realize he was grinding you against him, pleasure quickly twitching at your clit in response as flat hands flew to his chest to stabilize yourself.
âwhatâ what are you doing?â you stammered, your chest heaving a little.
âsâsorry!âŠâ he mumbled, eyes still trained to the same area. âit justâ felt kind of good⊠so..â
yuji peered up at you, a cautious look on his face as he eyed you curiously with his pinky cheeks brightâ hesitantly indulging in his overwhelming sick need for you, as simply making out was just not cutting it anymore ever since he got a taste of how something like this could feel a couple of seconds ago.
and your thoughts were identical to his.
timidly, you slid your hands up slowly to rest back on his manly shoulders, the rough material of his compression tee under your fingers making you literally squeeze your hole around nothing, eyes nervously darting around his face.
âoâokayâŠâ
his hand came up to brush some of your soft hair over your shoulder, his thumb moving in to caress gently over your hot cheek.
âcan i⊠can i do it again?â
you shakily nodded, and he gripped your hips again before moving you just like he did before, your crotch coming down to meet his slowly and cautiously as your mouth partially hung open at how good it actually felt, yuji staring at your expression with blown out pupils and nearly drooling over it.
but he wanted more, his hands moving you then to grind on him a little faster, his hips coming up to meet yours at the same time as you shyly met him halfwayâ quick and stuttery until all of a sudden you were full blown humping into each other like rabid dogs, your tiny whiny moans setting him the fuck off as he captured your lips again to make out with you, fearing if he let you quietly moan like that for his ears to selfishly drink up that he was going to end up busting in his pants.
âyâyujiâŠâ you whimpered in between kisses.
âyeah baby?â his husky voice sent another electrical shock of ecstasy through your body, your fingers gripping his shirt in tiny fists as you didnât even know what exactly you were pleading him for.
but he knew.
he wrapped his arms entirely around you and moved so that you were laying flat on your back now, yuji in between your legs as he kissed you sloppily while grinding himself back on you again, him literally mimicking how it would be to fuck you as you squeezed his biceps for support, your thin pajama shorts feeling his hard cock bulging from his pj pants and rutting against your cunt desperately with every hump.
yuji, literally trapped in a dimension of arousal and nasty fucking thoughts of you with every moan that slipped past your puffy soft lips, had him reaching and tugging down on the waist band of your shorts like an animal, your baby blue panties with a little ribbon bow in the middle making him nearly choke on his spit.
your hand quickly came to clasp around his wrist, stopping him.
âyâyuji my parents! i donât know if we shouldââ
âoh fuckââ he whispered, looking up to the top of your staircase and down where your parents were sound asleep, gnawing so much on his bottom lip in cock blocked agony that he accidentally drew blood.
and you didnât know why, but the urge was unforgiving as you reached up and cupped his hot sweaty cheeks, pulling his face down as you stuck your tongue out and licked over his bleeding lip.
yuji stared, eyes wide, before he let out a low guttural grown and shoved his face into the crook of your neck.
âfuck fuck fuck fuckââ
you were fucking killing him.
he rolled his leaky cock slowly into you again, his shoulders trembling at the cold feeling of his wet boxers that were literally covered in pre cum the moment your pretty plush thighs sat over his lap, you speaking up.
âmâmaybeââ
he pulled back fast.
âyeah?â
âmaybe if you justâ look. that⊠that should be fine, right?â
âyeah yeah!â yujiâs invisible tail was practically wagging over your words. âlook uh huh! just look baby.â
you bit your lip, slowly reaching down and tugging as both of yujiâs hands went flying down to help you, pulling them over your thighs and down to your ankles before setting them behind him on the couch with a soft thud.
you kept your thighs closed, shy and timid as you realized yuji hadnât seen you like this yet⊠your cheeks flaring in embarrassment as he pulled your knees apart and gawked at the vision before him, yuji looking at you like you had built the entirety of rome by yourself with your bare hands.
you hadnât noticed yet, but your panties were drenchedâ a patch of wet spread over your lips that literally outlined the anatomy of your pussy to a t, leaving little to the imagination as his eyes stayed locked on your clit in a complete trance.
âoh my god, pretty!âŠâ he murmured, his index finger coming down to softly touch and rub your puffed up clit over your panties, you squeaking in response and slamming your thighs closed again.
âsorry! sorry!â he sputtered, frantic as he came down to peck little kisses on your cheek apologetically, your eyes shut, bashful. âdid that hurt? i didnât mean to iâm sorryââ
ânâno!â you shook your head and slowly peeked your eyes open. âit didnât⊠just felt sâsensitive.â
his shoulders relaxed in relief, nodding, his eyes widening in delight when you spread your legs back open for him again, your panties literally stuck slick to your pussy at this point.
yujiâs fingers pressed against your folds, him wanting to just feel the way your little wet lips mushed up against his digits, his curious hand directing him slowly up over your clit and back down by your virgin hole as he breathed hard through his nose, trying to get himself to calm the fuck down over your cunt and not freak you out.
but what he was doing felt good, him having no idea as you pulled your bottom lip in between your teeth with your eyebrows screwed together in euphoria, his ears perking up at the sounds of your sweet little moans and whines the more pressure he applied to it.
and then he got an idea.
as you were distracted getting riled up by his fingers, yuji shoved his other hand under his wet pajama pants and boxers, pulling out his throbbing cock and pumping it a little as his angry tip leaked with every jerkâ a drop oozing down and landing right on your nub before rolling over your panties as he breathed out a string of hushed curses.
yuji replaced the hand on your pussy with his cock, his length and tip pushing up in between your sopping cunt and back down, completely soiling your panties with a mix of your arousal and his pre cum as he rolled his hips into you again, you not noticing at all until both of his rough hands came to grip and squeeze over your inner thighs, your eyes fluttering open as you wondered why it felt way better than before, them bulging once you saw his thick long dick slipping and sliding hurriedly against your pussy.
âbâbaby!â you moaned breathlessly, but yuji literally could not hear you as his dazed droopy eyes stayed focused on your swollen puss while he continued to rut.
âuh huh..?..â he panted. âwhatâs wrong sweetheartâŠâ
your words lodged themselves in the back of your throat as a particular rough thrust made you choke and clamp your mouth shut, squeezing your eyes shut in response with your sensitive nub pulsing as you felt yujiâs leaky sticky cum all over you.
âdoes itâ does it feel good?â his eyes finally trailed up to look at you, his already fucked out expression and flushed face forming a yummy pit in your stomach that you recognized as your release whenever you fingered yourself, except that feeling no where near as good as what you felt right fucking now.
âmhm..â you moaned and licked your lips.
yujiâs fingers slid up from your inner thighs and to the straps of your panties, fiddling and playing with them as he rolled his hips like a little perv, his tip at times falling and literally sinking into your gaping virgin hole a bitâ your panties a thin stretchy wall that frustratingly stopped his cock from going, slipping back upward instead.
âbabyâŠâ he moaned lowly, whispering. âmaybe we should just have sex right nowâŠâ
you gasped. âright now?! i donât know yuji myâ my parentsâ and weâve neverââ
he leaned down and sloppily kissed you, speaking in between each smack.
âtheyâre asleep itâsââ mmphfâ âitâs okayââ
yuji already had his middle finger hooked under your wet panties as he started pulling down, you squeaking at the cold breeze hitting your bare clit.
âi want to butâ hic!â
he rubbed his tip over your entrance a bit, pooling your juice up.
âwhat ifâ what if we get too loud? and they come downstairsââ
he shook his head. âiâll keep on a lookout pretty donât worry about it...â he murmured. âyou just relax while i pump my cock in, yeah?â
you whimpered, nodding quickly and pathetically as you wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him down flush against your chest, suctioning tiny sucks on his jaw to keep you from moaning the loudest youâve moaned all night as he started pushing in, yujiâs mind in a literal fucking state of delirium as his dick was finally gonna be buried in your cute pussy after wanting it for so long.
you hiccuped against his jaw, your arms gripping him tighter as he stretched you out so good, feeling a little pinch in your walls that made you spread your legs wider in attempts at alleviating it.
âohhhh fuckkkk babyââ he moaned loud and you quickly clamped a hand over his mouth.
âshhh honey shhhââ
âmâsorry mâsorry mâsorryââ
his voice was muffled against your hand as he pumped deeper, your squeal catching itself in your throat and his body fucking shivering at the way your tight slobbering walls sucked him in without him having to even push, your hole clenching around him and pumping more strings of stray pre cum out inside you.
âmy god do that again please do that againââ he panted, reeling his hips back slowly and pushing in at a steady rhythm.
âdâdo what?â you panted, your eyes closing in pleasure.
âsqueezeâ shit!â squeeze me please pleaseââ he begged, pressing wet open mouthed kisses on your cheeks as he licked up your little overstimulated tears.
âlikeâ like this?â
you clenched your hole again and his body jerked, his choked moans huffing in your ear as he rolled and snapped his hips faster.
âmm! yuji my godââ you squealed and he placed a hand over your mouth, the both of you now covering over each others as he proceeded to drill his hips in, the couch squeaking with every messy hit.
your hand tightened over his lips the louder he moaned, your eyes silently pleading with him to be a little quieter, but him too lost in the milking of his cock and the way your fucked out face looked as he couldnât connect the dots with what you were asking of him, suddenly your blurry brain coming into reasonable consciousness for a second as you became aware of the fact that you werenât even using protection.
âbâbabyââ you muffled against his hand. âweâre not using aâ mmm! câcondom we needââ
smack smack smackâ
âshit i donâtâ i donât have one sweetheart.â he stifled, and yuji only went faster then, harder and jerky as his awkward virgin hips jolted you up and down on him, your eyes rolling back. âsâokay iâll just pull out mâkay? iâll pull outââ
his snappy pace brought your brain back into your previous dumb erotic state, nodding dazedly as he scooched his hand down and shoved his middle and ring finger inside your wet mouth, your tongue slobbering over his digits before your lips lewdly closed around them and sucked.
yuji was not keeping a lookout for your parents.
âoh fuck baby you look so fucking pretty doing thatâŠâ he choked. âyou look so so pretty under me and taking my dickââ
âmhm..â you moaned around his fingers, drool seeping out of your mouth and down your chin as you felt like you were on the brink of cumming and squelching all over him.
âiâm gonna pull out soon okay? i feelââ pantâ âi feel like iâm cummingââ
you pulled back from his fingers with a pop and licked your lips, nodding vigorously as you squeezed your eyes painfully shut, your release washing over you like a prickly wave with your mouth hung wide open and your vision blowing bright white.
but in the midst of you creaming, you accidentally clamped your thighs shut around yuji as he tried to slip his dick out.
âfuck! i canâtââ pantâ âbaby open your legs please im gonnaâ fuck fuck fuck!ââ
yujiâs cum pummeled inside you and filled you the absolute brim as he gasped and whined in your ear, his balls draining so much of it into you that it took no time at all for it to slip past your hole and onto your couch below, the both of you heaving heavily with your clothes stuck against your sweaty sticky bodies.
âare youââ he swallowed. âare you okay baby? iâm sorry i came insideââ
âitâs okay it wasnât youââ you tried to regulate your breathing. âitâ it was my fault⊠i trapped you inâŠâ
you sheepishly looked at him and gnawed at the inside of your cheek in shame, your face only making him lazily grin and press a hard loving kiss to your cheek.
âitâs okay. we can figure it out later!â
he peeled away from you and sat up, his softening cock still buried inside as he slowly pulled out and watched the rest of his cum spurt out, taking one of his shaky fingers and collecting some before pushing it back in your hole.
âdonât put it back in yujiiii!â you whined.
âsorry! sorry sorryââ he grabbed your wrist gently and kissed the back of your hand, his pinky cheeks vibrant as he looked at you with a wobbly shy smile. âiâ i couldnât help myselfâŠâ
you giggled. âsâokay honey.â
he laid his body back over yours, being mindful not to squish you as he leaned some of his weight on his arms, cutely pecking your puffy lips over and over until he was satisfied with the amount, nuzzling his face in the crook of your neck after.
âmâglad my first time was with you yujiâŠâ you murmured into his ear, your words causing his heart to literally bang against his chest as he felt like he was on cloud nine with you underneath him like that.
âiâm glad it was with you pretty.â he pushed, looking into your fucked out eyes with sincerity. âand i hope it stays that way. just my dick.â
you laughed loudly, your hand quickly coming up to cover your mouth as he giggled.
you pecked his nose sweetly and readjusted your hips, your cum covered pussy brushing against his cock again, the blood immediately rushing back to it faster than a speeding fucking bullet.
he traced a loving finger across your bottom lip delicately, a little grin on his face.
you quirked a brow. âwhat?â
âcan we umââ he quickly kissed you. âcan we try doggy style right now?â
ââ©â§âËౚà§Ëââ©â§âââ©â§âËౚà§Ëââ©â§âââ©â§âËౚà§Ëââ©â§âââ©â§âËౚà§Ëââ©â§âââ©â§â
taglist!! <33 (THANK YOU THANK YOU!):
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watching videos of myself as a child be like âbaby girl, you are so autistic and you donât even know.â
#me echoing my mum bc echolalia before i knew what it was#i probably just thought it sounded funny to say bc i was like 5#guess what? it took another 15 years to get diagnosed#truly yâall were blind#itâs so obvious when i look back like holy shit#not saying the system is broken and i was let down but iâm not NOT saying that#truly wanna go back to baby gwen and say âone day youâll know why your brain is the way it isâ#thereâs nothing wrong with you. you arenât a freak or a monster or whatever horrible thing you thought about yourself when you so so little#and shouldnât have been feeling like that#idk iâm in a weird mood tonight#it just makes me kinda sad for my baby self#but alas noting can be done now#you canât change the past#but to that little guy: you are great okay <3#gwen rambles#gwenposting
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toxic!rafe will blow your phone up the second you post something on instagram that heâs âiffyâ about.
you posted a photo dump which consisted of some random photos of the beach, some of your friends, one of you and rafe of course, but the one that had rafe seeing red was the last slide, which was you in a bikini. he texted you several times at first, and while you were literally typing your response, he called you. your fingers were typing so fast to respond to him that you accidentally declined the call, and he did not like that. you immediately went to call him back, but another text from rafe rolled in, saying âfuck you donât talk to me weâre doneâ you sighed loudly, knowing damn well he was talking out of his ass right now, so you sat back and waited for the inevitable next string of texts to roll in. which they did, only seconds later.
rafe <3: do you get off on making me mad or something
rafe <3: like iâm racking my brain trying to understand why you do the things you do and thatâs all i can come up with
rafe <3: and i see at least 4 guys have already liked your post like thatâs crazy to me?? thought i told you to block all the guys that followed you?? of course you didnât
rafe <3: also who even took that pic of you??? bc i know damn well it wasnât me so who the fuck you posing for with your fucking ass and tits out? WHAT THE FUCK
rafe <3: DO NOT PUT YOUR SHIT ON DO NOT DISTURB answer me rn.
rafe <3: nah itâs cool actually iâm gonna go hit up my other gfs so you have a good night.
you rolled your eyes at that last text, deciding to fully turn your phone off. you knew he would likely try to text or call you again very soon but you didnât want to deal with it right now. this wasnât your first rodeo, you knew nothing you could say to him right now would calm him down, so letting him freak out on his own was the best method to his madness.
three hours had passed since you turned your phone off. you had caught up on some reading and turned on your current favorite show, but found yourself interrupted by a knock at your front door. you expected it to be rafe, but instead it was a large bouquet of your favorite flowers and a gift bag. you glanced around to see if rafe was lurking around, but saw nothing. when he freaked out over text and was able to reread his actions, he usually waited a bit longer to show his face as opposed to a verbal argument.
you brought the flowers inside and set them on the counter before grabbing the card attached to the side of the bouquet.
sorry we argued. you are so beautiful and i love you so much. got you a little gift and sent you some money for food and i set your appointment with your nail girl for tomorrow at 10. love you forever baby -rafe
you couldnât help but smile just a little. the flowers were beautiful and the note was pretty sweet, so you chose to ignore the part where he said âwe argued.â you didnât get a word in, but you let it slide. especially after you opened the gift bag to see the new dior bag you had been wanting.
you hurried to turn on your phone, immediately seeing a $500 apple payment from rafe as well as a new text from a few minutes ago.
rafe <3: hope you like the flowers and bag baby. love you! :)
you: i love them. thanks rafe, love you too
rafe <3: good to hear. lmk what you end up getting for dinner and iâll pick you up tomorrow to take you to your nail apt. canât wait to see you baby
you would order yourself dinner that was obviously way less than $500, but you would send rafe a picture and thank him again. youâd facetime him before bed and conversation flowed like nothing had even happened just hours before. heâd ask you what color nails you were getting, tell you funny stories about the old men at the country club and excitedly plan what you two were going to do the next day. the cycle seemed like it would never end, but you often forgot about the bad when he was talking so sweetly to you and all you could think about was how excited you were to see him tomorrow.
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STARCROSSED +à©â©â§âË LOGAN HOWLETT.
logan and y/n â where you are completely in love with a man older then your father by a good 100 years.. and whose in love with another.
- content warning age gap. nsfw. sh. angst. not really happy endings! pairings: older!logan howlett x xaiver!reader
spoiler: horrible yearning!
note this is my first piece of work so i hope itâs okay! i love logan sm i had to write something for him â and this is really angsty :) pls ignore if thereâs any bad grammar! iâm a bit lazy rn, also with the timeline for this fic i have no idea when im going for. im saying 2000s-2010s just remember its a bit scrambled timeline wise cos i wanted my favs here!đ€ enjoy!
you hated when he was around. you couldnât stand it anymore. your longing glances to him, the yearning looks you gave him which were never returned and only thrown back into your face when you saw how he was looking at jean the way you looked at him.. it had all been getting too much. at first you acted like it didnât bother you and part of your school-girl crush deluded brain pretend you were just seeing things but as the weeks / months had passed you realised that was the furthest thing from the truth.
recently you couldnât even bring yourself to glance at him because it hurt too much and that wasnât even being dramatic, the aching feeling in your heart wasnât worth getting a glimpse of his timeless beauty so every time he was around you bit down the urges swallowed your pride and acted as if he was nobody to you, just a good friend. a father figure, a teammate.
it felt rude at first, to you since you were the only one noticing it, how you just stopped all those little things you were doing but you couldnât help it or stop yourself from being like that because it was too hard to deal with â loving someone so much with all your heart but you knew you couldnât have them. you hated to admit it but it destroyed you and that little part of you right now was falling into a full blown rage as you sat on the sofa alongside logan and wade â charles, hank, scott and rogue being present in the room too.
âi just donât get her.â scott said out, repeating the same line over again, still bitching about the fight him and jean had after they all got back from the mission â everyone could hear the screaming and scottâs harsh gaze when he entered the room just confirmed it all and the second,of course, logan asked a question after wade made a snarky comment that set off scott and he hadnât stopped mansplaining it since.
âyeaâ well certain people donât.â logan gruffly spoke out as y/n couldnât stop her eyes from moving over to him at his words, feeling a sense of hurt coarse through her like it usually did whenever he spoke about jean or implied her. everyone knew what loganâs comment meant and y/n could see how scott was biting his tongue, clearly pissed off like he always was around logan. for good reason.
the tension only grew worse when scott couldnât help himself and made a comment right back at him, his eyebrows raised as he stood from his seat. charles attention turning right to scott instead of logan, âand whatâs that supposed to mean, asshole?â scott spat out like his words were venom.
rogue rolling her eyes at his words as hank shared a little glance with y/n who was cursing the entire situation in her brain as she couldnât stop herself from looking at logan â those very same feelings boiling in her body as she saw the way his mouth twitched and his jaw clenched. how protective he was getting over jean, a feeling y/n couldnât help have been wishing for the past two years of knowing the man he would get like over her â sure in a friends way he mightâve done it before, at least thatâs how she saw but it never like this.
y/n swore she could physically feel her heart aching.
âpretty sure you know what that means pal.â logan bit back harshly, his words falling to the same tone as scottâs did as scott scoffed at what he said as he bit back with full frustration as charles clearly wanted to get involved - a little grimance pictured on his face as y/n studied her fathers expression, him clearly knowing what jean meant to logan, as y/n looked away before her dad could catch her staring her eyes falling onto a pissed off scott who downed the drink he had in his hand, placing it on the table.
âshe picked me.â was all scott needed to say as the weight in the room shifted heavily on loganâs end as everyone could see the way loganâs face dropped a little, that comment taking the little coy expression he had right away but y/n didnât even bring herself to look, scottâs eyes taking her in as if he knew what she was feeling in this moment. his eyes meeting her own as y/n felt a lump form her throat â the tightness almost burning â as he tutted at how silent logan was before he walked out the room without another word.
with this the room fell silent. everyone knowing the feelings logan mustâve been harbouring right now, y/n especially, as she glanced over to him not expecting to be met with his brown eyes looking back at her as he took in her expression before he roughly got up without another word â going right over to the door.
chaeles couldnât help himself as he spoke up firmly the second he watched logan head for the door, âloganââ
âjust goinâ for a piss, wheels.â he roughly said back before the door shut right behind him.
âmore like a bitchless weaping session.â wade couldnât help say as he had left the room, hank and rogue not being able to help their little laughs from coming out as y/n bit down on the inside of her cheek limiting the feelings she was experiencing as much as she could before she stood up.
ââiâm going to shower.â y/n said out lowly, her words slipping out quickly as the others nodded or hummed in agreement, wades eyebrows furrowing as he clearly felt he knew more of the situation then the rest did but he kept that to himself.
âtake some pics for me!â wade called back to her, earning a little look from charles as hank scoffed in reply.
â +à©â©â§âË
that shower was more like watching a re run of singing in the rain which y/n couldnât help watch the entirety of for no specific reason before she eventually hoped in the shower. the faint sounds of her speakers being heard as she hummed along to the lyrics of the specific song as she felt the cold water glide down her naked body.
swallowing the pain-filled whimpers that were aching to escape her wet lips as she acted as if the water gracing against all those marks and burns on her skin wasnât killing her inside despite her âlittleâ case of immortality. immortality sadly didnât mean you never experienced pain and y/n was clearly the leading case proving that matter as she soon got out the shower after washing her hair and her body.
wrapping the towel around her dainty body as she took in herself in the mirror, the thoughts forming in her brain being within the âself loathingâ category as she exited her bathroom. her face falling once she was met with the gruff expression on logans face which turned to one of shock as his eyes scanned over y/n immediately. him swallowing his own spit as y/n hands immediately wrapped around her towel just to make sure it wouldnât fall.
âloâ shit, i didnât know you were here.â she quickly managed out, her face a bright shade of red as she watched as logan didnât move his gaze off her figure.
ââwait.â not a single word escaping his lips as y/n walked over to her bed where her clothes were laid out for her.
y/nâs breath was hitched and she swore she felt all the heat rush to her face as she took in the way logan was just staring at her as she grabbed her clothes with her other hand, taking a few steps back into the bathroom before she swiftly shut the door. her mind a mess as she quickly put on her pajamas before she sprung over to the mirror to double check her appearance before she walked back out to her bedroom.
logan being in the exact same place she had left him â not a single word had left his lips and his facial expression was the exact same as y/n nervously smiled at him.
âwhat are you doingâ uh, here?â y/n asked him swiftly, her words rushed as she swore she could hear her heartbeat in her ears as she saw logan slowly seem to come back to reality, scratching the back of his neck as his lips parted as he tried to say something.
yet it took a little for something to come out as y/n swore she felt something growing in the air as logan finally spoke, his gruff tone a little knocked back then usual, âwas coming here to bitch about scott. didnât mean to see anything i shouldnât have.â
his words sent a little chill through y/nâs spine as she managed a little smile on her lips, no matter how fake it was she still managed it, as she looked at him. his first words being all the confirmation her heart needed in this moment as she held back her feelings as she felt her heart tense.
âitâs okay.â y/n rolled out quietly, her attention falling over to her bed as she walked over to the foot off it â sitting down on the edge of the bed as logan stayed in place, his arms crossed as he leaned against the fireplace in her room now.
âso scott, you wanna bitch?â y/n trailed off into as logan looked out the window, seemingly lost in his thoughts as he shrugged his shoulders.
ânah, not anymore.â he said, his voice low as y/n took in his hush voice â his words only adding to the building up tension that was making the air thick as y/n looked at him. her eyes taking in every inch off him and how he looked, her mind wondering how heâd feel.. howâd heâd taste.
yet her thoughts were immediately cut short.
ââyou seen jean about?â
his words were like a harsh hit round the face as she felt a lump for her in throat, her mind tingling a little as she glanced over to the door. she hated this, every inch of this. she wanted to scream, punch him in the face. confess right there and there at him but she didnât. she couldnât.
no matter how much it killed her inside. every second without him being like a gun shot to the heart as she plainly looked back at him, a soft smile growing on her face which was so fake it was indescribable as she nodded to her bedroom door.
âher room, i guess.â
her low words were enough to make anyone know she was hurt yet of course logan didnât, or he didnât show he knew as he gave her a playful wink.
âthanks bub.â he said with a nod as he went to walk out the room â his hand on the door when y/n heard his muttered words.
âsleep well y/n.â
his words fell into silence as y/n watched him leave, the door closing behind him being the utmost reminder of how her feelings will probably never be acknowledged. and that harsh reality left her alone in her bedroom for the entire night and with every toss and turn her mind was on one thing and one thing only. him.
â +à©â©â§âË
#logan howlett x fem!reader#wolverine x reader#logan howlett x reader smut#logan howlett#james logan howlett#deadpool#angst#logan howlett x reader#deadpool and wolverine#logan howlett x you#x men movies#x men#marvel xmen#x force#yearning hours#logan howlett imagine#deadpool 3#hugh jackman#marvel#marvel imagines
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For Omega Yamo can you please have him be an Oiler still? Because I miss him and we havenât even played a game without him yet. Also Iâm already emotionally invested in Nuge being the Alpha in the heat situation you had come up with in tags on the shower post đ©·
dear nonnie: you and i are in the same boat here đ
#liv in the replies#kissing you (with consent) full on the mouth travis dermott style. ily. there is no universe where this would not be ryan and oilers yamo#thatâs who the brainworms started with & i have SUCH a fondness for nuge that likes to smack me upside the head whenever i see him. but#mostly because i too miss yamo incredibly much on the oilers. i hope seattle treats him well iâm glad he gets to go home but also i miss him#please have the entirety of Actual Fic that is written for this fic instead of notes#because for some reason???? my brain was like âactually do you want 1k of a completely unrelated ficâ that just happens to share the doc#and i was like. uhhhhh. ok i guess. thanks for the thing i Will Not Do Anything With until 10000 other things are done#in another universe where it is not midnight you would be receiving the full breakdown of how i think a/b/o scenting physiology works#& the Opinions i have about the idea of pheromones but if this ever gets done and anyone wants it i will happily make a directorâs cut
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Easy to Please
Pairing: Sleazy Landlord!Joel x Reader
Summary: Months pass, and you canât make rentâagain. You find another way to pay your sleazy landlord. Again.
Warnings: 18+. Unprotected p-in-v. Oral (m!receiving). Dubcon Ă la power imbalance / sex for money. Infidelity. Pervy!Joel. Talks of abuse. Omitting one tag to avoid spoiling the endingâplease read at your own risk.
Note: This fic was loosely inspired by my three favorite songs about female adulteryââThinkinâ Bout Cheatinâ by Mae Estes, âLyinâ Eyesâ by The Eagles, and âCheatinâ Songsâ by Midland. No, I donât support infidelity. Yes, it makes for fun fiction.
Word count: 3.1k
You hate the face he makes when he cums.
You hate the way he tastes when heâs done.
You hate the grit and the heft of the man, every lone hair that sprouts silver from his chest, and the way he pats the open space beside him in bed after you roll away.
âNever seen a girl so goddamn allergic to cuddling!â
What makes his observation worse is that you know youâre hating it more and more with every passing day.
Today you have seven Benjamins, two Grants, and a Jackson tucked into your purse. You walk with a sluggish gait, knowing youâre $310 short of making this monthâs rent and last. But you go on anyway. Itâs not like Joel canât see you from where heâs seated on the porch.
The pleasantries you exchange are short. By now, you have only to breeze past him in his lawn chair and say, âI canât stay long,â and he knows the rest. He grabs his six-pack, then his Pall Malls, and asks after you all the same.
âHowâs the wrist?â he says.
You sprained it over the weekend. You arenât sure how he heard. At any rate, you ignore the question and set your bag down on the counter before going to the fridge. You deflect with a question of your ownâwhat the hell happened to the lemonade? He had a full jug last week.
âGot thirsty,â Joel answers, shrugging.
Youâre always thirsty, you tell him, and you eye the case of Heineken that heâs placed by your purse. You donât need to see his face to feel the smile starting to form.
âDonât I know it,â he says. Insinuating.
Youâd hit him over the head if youâd been able to reach. Heâs still smiling when your shoulder checks hisâcloser to his elbow, from the feel of itâand when you leave the kitchen, he leaves too. He trails behind you with an ease that says this is the sixth time this has happened since August, and youâre hardly a week out from Halloween.
Itâs not just rent you need to pay; itâs other things. Transmission in your truckâs gone to shit. Phoneâs been on the fritz since you dropped it in the tub. Talking heads on TV say the countryâs on track to get hit with another recession, and from the way your boss has been slashing your hours in half, you think they may be right. The crack in your bathroom window was tiny last week. Today itâs gone, because your husband put his fist through the thing on Sunday. You patched the hole with duct tape.
Joelâs covering the cost for the pane to be replaced, but thatâs because he has to. Heâs your landlordâproud owner of the Delta Commons trailer park since â97âand thatâs what landlords do. Everything else is yours to pay.
Youâre a part-time student, part-time waitress, and a full-time caretaker for your ailing spouse, or so you call him. Joel knows Stetsonâs not sick, just perennially unemployed and drunk. You pay for most things, and itâs rarely enough to cover your rent. Stetson doesnât care.
And thatâs where Joel comes in.
No pun intended, but in his mind, thereâs really no nicer way to say it: you fuck his brains out to make up for the shortfall in rent. You blow him before work to make sure your husband and you will have enough to eat that week. You bite the warm, freckled skin between his shoulder and his neck while you ride him, because you know that gesture will get you a little extra cash when you leave. You smile after swallowing him, and Joel knows that it tastes like shit. Youâve gotten good at faking it lately.
What he hopes isnât totally fabricated is the way you call him big. Strong. Handsome. So stupidly well-endowed that you have to wince for the first few seconds when you sit on it, and go slow when he takes you from behind
âO-ow!â you whine presently.
His dick isnât even in you yet. You just stubbed your toe on the edge of his dresser on your way to the bathroom.
âYou alright?â
âFuck me!â
I will, he thinks.
âWant me to get an iceââ
âLet go-OW! FUCK!â
Joel barely even touched your wrist and you were flinching away with a brand new pain. You rub it, almost defensively, then pin him with an icy glare. Nice going.
âIâm sorry,â he mumbles.
Now heâll be lucky if he can swing a half-hearted handy from the one that isnât hurt. Thatâs how mad you look.
You turn your body away, and for a second, Joel assumes that his fate has been sealed: youâll bumble over to the rug by his bed, toss a pillow on the floor, and assume what he already knows to be your least favorite position. Youâll kneel, and talk of migraines and your long, grueling day and in the end find an excuse not to use your mouth. Thatâll be okay. But with the debts you owe him now, it also wonât be enough, and Joel will have to ask you back again. He hates sounding needy, but baby, dealâs a deal.
Luckily you donât give him the chance to use that line. Much to his surprise, you get on the bed. You lie down. You seem to take a little more care settling in this time, but you take off your clothes. Itâs a lime green tank top and some ratty jean skirt, but itâs enough to tempt him.
And not just tempt, but oblige him to accept, unblinking. He crawls over the bed to get to you, and he finds that his spitâs filling his mouth a little quicker. His hands are starting to shake as they slide over the duvet, and the tree trunks he once called his legs are runny, like eggs.
He has to remind himself, bluntly, of your last name, the shiny ring on your hand, your husbandâs name, yourâ
âAgeâwhatâd you say your age was again?â Joel asks.
You look confused for a second, but you tell him.
âTwenty-one.â
Way too fucking young to have gotten hitched three years ago. But then he remembers this is Leakey, Texas, and your family hasnât strayed more than ten miles from the center of town in four generations. You told him that.
âI thought you said twenty,â Joel says, a little uneasy.
âI did. Up until this past Sunday I was.â
âOh.â
A beat.
âHappy birthday.â
You blink.
âYou gonna take your pants off or what?â
And he does. Maybe embarrassed at first, but then the jeans come off, and his boxers go next, and without so much as a word or a breath, his worries are sliding away like water off his back. Like his clothes now peeling off.
Like your smile growing thin at the sight of him half-stripped on the bed in front of you. Joel doesnât flatter himself to think heâs even half as handsome as he was in his youth, but he knows he has his draws. What endears him to you today is, unfortunately, his wallet. But that doesnât mean you canât be convinced to like him more.
More than Stetson, he thinks without humor.
Dumb son of a bitch canât tell his ass from his elbow and yet heâs won himself you, living it up these last three yâ
âOh.â
He sounds like an owl now. His clothes are off, and youâre rubbing him, pumping him gently in your hand, which you were so kind to make wet with your saliva. It even sounds better than his, the way it squelches with every flick. Joel can only say so much in strangled breaths.
He tries anyway:
âFeel like a dream, sweet pea.â
Sweet pea.
Your pace quickens. Joel swears he can see the corners of your lips twitch, but then he thinks youâre just wincing. You move down to the floor beside the bed. Kneel almost politely while you nestle yourself between his parted legs
Your mouth is warm. Itâs always warm. Joel wouldnât expect a girlâs tongue to greet his dick like ice, but yours is always heated to a thousand degrees, it feels like. He enjoys the sting. Your lips envelop his big, leaking tip, and he swears he can stay like this foreverâin you.
On you, too. Heâs got his palm resting flat on your head, and he doesnât mean to, but he pushes. He bunches your hair in a fist and drags your face to make you swallow.
Mean old man, you must be saying in your head when he stuffs your mouth full. Makes your eyes prick with tears.
Sweet girl. My sweet pea, he thinks, affectionately, and continues to rub your scalp. He holds your teary gaze.
And then youâre moving up. Down. Coating his length with shiny spit and tiny whimpers as your lips move gently back and forth, again and again. Joelâs grip tightens in your hair, and he begs for more. More.
âMore,â he orders, jaw clenched, âFit a little moreâa me.â
From where youâre kneeling below, you look put off.
Then you pull off, and you wipe your wet chin.
âChokinâ me,â you grumble, ââSâtoo big.â
Normally, Joel loves to hear that.
Now, however, heâs sliding his touch to your chin and tilting your head up to him. Thumbing at the spit dribbling out on either side of your mouth and subsequently coaxing your lips further apart.
He slides back in, and you donât fight it. You like it. Holding his gaze in a soft, docile look while your lips stretch deliciously around his shaft, you must love it. Every inch and every twinge of pleasure from the brush of his cock going in and out must be your favorite thing.
Joel hopes it is, anyway. He holds your face now, and your throat convulses involuntarily. Youâre so pretty.
âSuch a good, sweet girl, ainât ya?â he presses, watching the coarse grey hairs at the base of him tickle your face.
You respond well to praise. You preen under those words, and try to nod. But his cock is so deep down your throat you end up choking again. Joel watches all of it smiling.
Petting your head and not pushing again. Grinning.
âLove my cock nice and stuffed in that pretty throat?â
You blink instead of nodding, but itâs more than enough.
âLove me deep?â
And the head of him sinks somewhere heâs never been. Your eyes are like two wide pools, and your lips leak everywhereâyour chin, your cheeks, your neck.
Joelâs smearing it all with his palm and smiling so wide that he thinks he might pull a muscle. He pants heavily.
âJust what youâre made for. Just what you need.â
You look like you might agree. He keeps going.
âMy fuckinâ mouth. My pretty, pretty mouth.â
He holds your face. He thinks he might cum.
âAinât a damn thing Stetson can do for this mouth, huh?â
And then he doesnât. Joel barely blinks, and youâre already bucking your head out of his hold, mouth skittering away while the spit spills out. Youâre practically drenched down to the chest when your face rears back. Your eyes are alight and no longer smiling when you grit:
âDonât.â
Joel shouldâve known better.
Heâs hit a raw nerve, and now he really wishes he hadnât.
It doesnât stop thereâbut it doesnât get better, either. Things progress in much the same way as they always have but with none of the need, or the warmth, of before. You climb back up and straddle him quick. Not meeting his eye, you just sit down, and slide down, and donât wince at all. You donât tell him that heâs big, and he doesnât get the chance to even groan at the first influx of pleasure before youâre riding him. Bouncing and grinding your hips against his with all the passion of someone perusing the newspaper. You donât whimper or moan.
Of course, Joel enjoys the feeling. He also wants someone to punch him in the throat for what heâs done.
âHey, honââ he starts, voice strained, âHon, Iâm sorrââ
âShut up,â you snap.
Your movements hardly falter, and now your hand is seizing the headboard. Youâre clenching him tight inside your wet, drooling cunt, and itâs obvious youâre trying to make him cum as quickly as possible. You swallow hard.
Joel isnât sure what to do. On the one hand, his body is being flooded with pleasure, and on the other, he fears you may never do this with him again. Quickly fixing on the latter, he cups your face in one hand. Itâs still wet.
His fingers smear the spit, and somehow you look even prettier. You keep grinding your body in desperate little fits above him, and really, you feel fucking amazing, but Joel is too focused on other thoughts. He squeezes you.
âBabyââ he tries again, but you shush him just as fast.
Your hips are moving viciously now. No matter how sore your legs might have been from a long day toiling awayâjust a couple hours before your shift at your next job, if Joelâs remembering correctlyâyouâre working him well. Doing him in. Fucking his brains out, but you arenât his.
His fingers smear the spit even more. Never will be his.
âSweet peaââ
âDonât fucking call me that!â
Now he canât deny that his climax is close. But this isnât how he wanted it to endâwith you so incensed you can hardly look him in the eye. His hand rubs more, helpless.
And just when heâs seconds away from painting your insides white, losing it all to the pleasure, he sees it.
His wet, sticky touch has uncovered a residue.
Joel pulls his fingers away in a blink, and simultaneously, your eyes are fluttering closed. Youâre focused now on climax; because of that, you donât see what he sees.
What heâs stunned to find on his fingers: makeup.
Lots and lots of thick, heavy makeup on your cheeks. Concealer, he thinks heâs heard it called once or twice.
No matter the name, he quickly comes to see what itâs for. Just as youâre hitting your peak, squeezing the headboard behind him, and coming undone with a shockwave trembling all through your body, Joel pales.
The makeup that you applied so heavy tonight hides bruises. Black and blue and awful hues of greenish-purple too, your whole face, he sees, is engulfed.
He doesnât speak. He wonât ask.
He wonât cum tonight, either.
Heâll finish something else.
You leave Joelâs trailer angry. You donât say goodbye. The screen door screams shut behind you when you leave, and silently, you wonder why he didnât cum. For once, you wish he hadâand hadnât said half of what he did.
Six hours pass like molasses, and by the end of it allâthe close of your second shiftâStetsonâs name still echoes in your head. The way Joel said it. It hums along the walls of your skull while you walk, and as you draw closer to home, you remember that strange and infuriating tone.
Then you remember your own less than two months ago:
Donât talk to my husband. Donât talk about my husband.
They were two simple rules, and Joel broke them both.
He mustâve defied the first when paying a visit to make repairs that week, and thatâs when Stetson mentioned your hand: how you âslippedâ in the bath. Tripped and conveniently sprained your wrist the same night he almost tore your arm out of the socket for looking at a waiter a tad too long at dinner. Youâd bet any sum of money Joel didnât get to hear that part from Stetson when he came over to see about the window, though.
No, your twenty-first came and went without so much as a word about your wrist. Your arm. Your faceâused to getting caked with concealer every third week or so.
You wince as you open the door. You walk slowly.
At first, youâre met with silence, and you sigh with relief. Then you hear it, and shortly drop your purse to the floor.
You all but fall down yourself at the sight: your husband doubled over across from you, in the kitchen. His head in his hands. You donât need to see the face to know that itâs bleeding. Profusely. You tread ever slower into the room, thinking somehow, some way heâs going to blame this on you. And when he straightens a little and shows off the full, gruesome extent of his injuries, you blanch to think that it might be. His bodyâs been beaten to a pulp.
Your pulse hammers in your head so loud you canât hear him groan. You see him, but you donât really believe it.
And when Stetson reaches for you, you stagger back.
Your hands skim the counter, but your brain barely registers it. Your husbandâs calling to you now, âQuit standinâ there lookinâ stupid, do somethinâ, huh?!â Heâs screaming, and youâre not hearing it. Barely feeling like a sentient person at all but just a doll stumbling backward on two wooden legs. As you walk, your palm stays stuck to the laminate underneath it, and suddenly, you feel it.
An envelope.
In this state, you arenât sure why you grab it, but you do.
You take the lone white paper, and you turn to leave. Your hands shake as you hold the thing, and your legs are hardly any better, but they carry you, miraculously, from the kitchen to the threshold of the back door. Then out. Stetsonâs not just yelling but bellowing, loud, every last obscenity known to man as he holds his bloodied side and limps in his perilous, pathetic way. Fortunately, youâre gone just in time to miss the bottle he hurls.
Outside, you walk. And walk. And in the still of the night youâre obliged to find your way through a miscellany of trailers and trucks and old, creaking vans by moonlight, and the throbbing in your head begins to slow. You donât rush to get far, and you donât have your keys even if you wanted to drive off. You keep walking. Watching nothing.
When your eyes drift to the envelope in your hand, you barely see that either. Youâre just blinking as you look, and breathing as you wait for the sight to make sense.
Inside, you find seven Benjamins, two Grants, and a Jackson staring back. Next to them are a few dozen othersâenough to cover August, September, October, and several months before that, if you had to guess.
You hope youâll get the opportunity to thank Joel, and maybe tell him that you donât really hate him, someday.
#GAME JOEL I OWE YOU AN APOLOGYâŠâŠ.I WASNâT REALLY FAMILIAR WITH YOUR GAME#WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME HE SOUNDED LIKE THAAAAAAAT!!!!#joel miller smut#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller imagine#joel miller one shot#joel miller tlou#the last of us fic
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how to script your dream life and use it with any method!
hello friends! today i want to share with you how i personally script my dream life, and how this script is both my void list, states list, and precursor to almost every manifestation method i've ever used. i love scripting because it is not only a method in and of itself but it is also a simple list of everything you desire that you can now manifest using any method you love!
check back later for a link to my scripting templates. in the meantime, here are the steps to creating your perfect script from scratch with examples! all you need is a place to write it down.
step one:
time to brain dump! at the top of your page, write out every desire that comes to your head in list format. don't overthink it and don't worry if they sound silly or unrealistic; remember, absolutely anything is possible! you can write out a few desires to start or go hardcore and write out hundreds, whatever you feel inspired by. you can always come back to this step later. here is my example:
step two:
now its time to get organized! look at the desires you've written and figure out what subcategories they fall under. for example, "my eyes are light blue and gorgeous" could fall under the category of "appearance," and "i have $100,000 in my bank account" could fall under the category of "wealth and items." feel free to use any category name that makes sense to you.
step three:
now that you have a couple of categories written out and understand the structure of the script, your mind might start to have even more ideas. "ooh, now that i see revision is a category, there are a couple more things i'd like to revise..." or "why stop at one SP when i could have everyone chasing after me?" for step three, we go a little deeper into these categories and add more details of what our dream life will look like. you can also add new categories that pop into your head - in the example below, i've added "the world and society" and "skills and abilities."
note: the reason why i broke this up into multiple steps instead of just writing "write out all your desires at once" is because our brains can be mean to us and make us procrastinate if something isn't done "perfectly," so that's why adding an extra step is important to bypass the perfectionism.
optional steps:
because scripting is such a creative and expansive process, we might think of ideas we'd like to manifest in the future but not right now/not instantly. i like to organize my script further by adding another category: "future manifestations." these are ideas that i would love to manifest at some point later on but not necessarily while my dream life is manifesting right now.
another idea is separating categories even further into "instant manifestations" (manifestations that happen right now without things needing to unfold) or "perfect timing manifestations" (manifestations that slowly unfold naturally and linearly), if you want to get specific about how they show up in your life! however, these steps are completely optional and just fun details for specificity, and i can make a more detailed post on this later.
how you can use your script with any method:
scripting has been used as a successful manifesting and shifting method on its own forever because it specifically addresses one of the most important steps in the manifesting process - deciding what you want! by writing out what you want in your dream life, you can now decide that your script will manifest on its own or you can use any method under the sun to fulfill yourself within:
the void state: if you enter the void state to manifest, you could affirm "i have everything in my dream life script"
affirming: you can affirm "everything in my dream life script has come true"
visualization: you could create an imaginative scene where all of your desires from your script are fulfilled, or you can imagine looking at your script and smiling because everything came true
subliminals: you can create a very simple subliminal where all of your desires are included, or even a sub where the only affirmation is "i have everything in my dream life script"
the possibilities with scripting are absolutely endless. i hope that this guide has given you the inspiration and direction to write your own wonderful and unique script. now, go and get your dream life!
have fun! bunny đ
#law of assumption#neville goddard#manifestation#edward art#manifesting#loa#loassumption#dream life#scripting#reality shifting#manifest#master manifestor#dream girl#that girl#bunny's originals#script
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Weird Brain Hacks That Help Me Write
I'm a consistently inconsistent writer/aspiring novelist, member of the burnt-out-gifted-kid-to-adult-ADHD-diagnosis-pipeline, recently unemployed overachiever, and person who's sick of hearing the conventional neurotypical advice to dealing with writer's block (i.e. "write every single day," or "there's no such thing as writer's block- if you're struggling to write, just write" Like F*CK THAT. Thank you, Brenda, why don't you go and tell someone with diabetes to just start producing more insulin?)
I've yet to get to a point in my life where I'm able to consistently write at the pace I want to, but I've come a long way from where I was a few years ago. In the past five years I've written two drafts of a 130,000 word fantasy novel (currently working on the third) and I'm about 50,000 words in on the sequel. I've hit a bit of a snag recently, but now that I've suddenly got a lot of time on my hands, I'm hoping to revamp things and return to the basics that have gotten me to this point and I thought I might share.
1) My first draft stays between me and God
I find that I and a lot of other writers unfortunately have gotten it into our heads that first drafts are supposed to resemble the finished product and that revisions are only for fixing minor mistakes. Therefore, if our first draft sucks that must mean we suck as writers and having to rewrite things from scratch means that means our first draft is a failure.
I'm here to say that is one of the most detrimental mentalities you can have as a writer.
Ever try drawing a circle? You know how when you try to free-hand draw a perfect circle in one go, it never turns out right? Whereas if you scribble, say, ten circles on top of one another really quickly and then erase the messy lines until it looks like you drew a circle with a singular line, it ends up looking pretty decent?
Yeah. That's what the drafting process is.
Your first draft is supposed to suck. I don't care who you are, but you're never going to write a perfect first draft, especially if you're inexperienced. The purpose of the first draft is to lay down a semi-workable foundation. A really loose, messy sketch if you will. Get it all down on paper, even if it turns out to be the most cliche, cringe-inducing writing you've ever done. You can work out those kinks in the later drafts. The hardest part of the first draft is the most crucial part: getting started. Don't stress yourself out and make it even harder than it already is.
If that means making a promise to yourself that no one other than you will ever read your first draft unless it's over your cold, dead body, so be it.
2) Tell perfectionism to screw off by writing with a pen
I used to exclusively write with pencil until I realized I was spending more time erasing instead of writing.
Writing with a pen keeps me from editing while I right. Like, sometimes I'll have to cross something out or make notes in the margins, but unlike erasing and rewriting, this leaves the page looking like a disaster zone and that's a good thing.
If my writing looks like a complete mess on paper, that helps me move past the perfectionist paralysis and just focus on getting words down on the page. Somehow seeing a page full of chicken scratch makes me less worried about making my writing all perfect and pretty- and that helps me get on with my main goal of fleshing out ideas and getting words on a page.
3) It's okay to leave things blank when you can't think of the right word
My writing, especially my first draft, is often filled with ___ and .... and (insert name here) and red text that reads like stage directions because I can't think of what is supposed to go there or the correct way to write it.
I found it helps to treat my writing like I do multiple choice tests. Can't think of the right answer? Just skip it. Circle it, come back to it later, but don't let one tricky question stall you to the point where you run out of brain power or run out of time to answer the other questions.
If I'm on a role, I'm not gonna waste it by trying to remember that exact word that I need or figure out the right transition into the next scene or paragraph. I'm just going to leave it blank, mark to myself that I'll need to fix the problem later, and move on.
Trust me. This helps me sooooo much with staying on a roll.
4) Write Out of Order
This may not be for everyone, but it works wonders for me.
Sure, the story your writing may need to progress chronologically, but does that mean you need to write it chronologically? No. It just needs to be written.
I generally don't do this as much for editing, but for writing, so long as you're making progress, it doesn't matter if it's in the right order. Can't think of how to structure Chapter 2, but you have a pretty good idea of how your story's going to end? Write the ending then. You'll have to go back and write Chapter 2 eventually, but if you're feeling more motivated to write a completely different part of the book, who's to say you can't do that?
When I'm working on a project, I start off with a single document that I title "Scrap for (Project Title)" and then just write whatever comes to mind, in whatever order. Once I've gotten enough to work with, then I start outlining my plot and predicting how many chapters I'm going to need. Then, I create separate google docs for each individual chapter and work on them in whatever order I feel like, often leaving several partially complete as I jump from one to the other. Then, as each one gets finished, I copy and paste the chapter into the full manuscript document. This means that the official "draft" could have Chapters 1 and 9, but completely be missing Chapters 2-8, and that's fine. It's not like anyone will ever know once I finish it.
Sorry for the absurdly long post. Hopes this helps someone. Maybe I'll share more tricks in the future.
#writing#creative writing#writerscommunity#writers on tumblr#writing tips#writing advice#writers block#novel writing#fiction writing#writer#writers of tumblr
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so american âą max verstappen
pairing: max verstappen x singer!reader
warnings: none; just some silly shit, some swearing, google translate dutch, max's home race is belgium and not the netherlands for timeline related reasons
summary: y/n is teasing way too many things at onceâŠ..can the fans keep up?Â
author's note: this is NOT an original concept i am aware of this. but this hasnât left my brain in days. iâve got a very specific vision so let me cook. i know i haven't posted on here in over a year but i've returned an f1 fan. enjoy!
yourname added to their story!Â
liked by delwatergap, maxverstappen1, and 3,491,842 others
yourname: i think i'm in love with montreal. sorry iâve been so off the grid but i am Loving Life so hard. so much inspo in my life rn. will talk soon i promise. love u all bunches đ«¶đŒđ·
ynsbestfriend: hey queen you have done it again!
-> yourname: ugh i love you so bad
user1: UM BAE WHOS THAT IN THE LAST SLIDE?
-> yourname: beats me!Â
-> user1: i do not trust you.Â
lilymhe: hiiiii pretty girl
-> yourname: stop im blushinggggg
user2: i fear sheâs in her lover girl eraÂ
-> user3: girl help im so fucking scared right now whatâs happening
user4: so does any of this have to do with your story from yesterday??????
*liked by yourname.*
maxverstappen1 added to their story!Â
yourname added to their story!Â
liked by honeymoon, danielricciardo, and 3,572,679 others
yourname: life's been a beach lately. clearly i've been loathing my time in spain ://///
user5: IS THAT MAX
-> user6: no bc it HAS to be
heidiberger_: Loved spending the week with you! đ€
-> yourname: same!!!!!! let's do it again sometime đ„°
-> user6: NOT DANNY RIC'S GF COMMENTING?????? AND LILY MUNI HE ON HER LAST POST???????
user6: no bc even if her and max were dating and she's been traveling with him why have we not seen her in the paddock
-> user7: to throw us off our rhythm????
-> user8: what if they debut at his home race in spa ijbol
liked by landonorris, taylorswift, and 4,683,892 others.
tagged: maxverstappen1, redbullracing, and ynsbestfriend
yourname: hahaha felt like dropping 2 things at once on u guys LOLLLLLLLL. thank u to redbullracing, spagrandprix, and the city of spa for letting me and my friends crash the race the other week to film the âso americanâ music video, and to maxie for winning in ur home country. it was so fucking special to be there supporting u. i love u baby!
ps. another thank u to max for thinking i'm the funniest person in the world and making fun of my americanness for as long as i've known him (which is quite a while).
enjoy this tune guys. it's urs forever and i hope u love it as much as i love the person it's about đ«¶đŒ đ§đȘ đłđ± TU DU DU DU!!!!!
user9: OH NMY GOD I FUCKING KNEW I SAW U IN THE GARAGE
ynsbestfriend: thanks for letting me third wheel mommy
-> yourname: no one else i'd rather drag along!!!
danielricciardo: Welcome to the family! Song's a banger although I can't believe it's actually about Max of all people đ€ą GROSS!!
-> yourname: jealousy is a disease danny.
user10: i actually cannot fathom this this is so me core
alexandramalsaintmleux: I am so glad to know you! Your happiness is everything đ©·
liked by sabrinacarpenter, carlossainz55, and 4,783,522 others.Â
tagged: yourname and ynsfriend
maxverstappen1: Spent a week away in New England with my talented, gorgeous girl. Loved getting away and experiencing America through her eyes! Consider me an honorary American now! Also, stream âSo Americanâ wherever you choose. It's about me đÂ
yourname: does this mean i can stop hiding in the garage now???
landonorris: Happy for you mate! Love the song as well yourname đ€
-> yourname: awe thank u lando đ„ș i got more to show u when i see u next!!!!!!
redbullracing: â€ïžđ
user11: MAX IS IN HIS LOVER BOY ERA
danielricciardo: How many more times can you say American?
liked by charles_leclerc, chappellroan, and 3,694,849 others
tagged: maxverstappen1
yourname: nothing like celebrating the best 2 weeks of my life than showing my boy around ye olde stomping grounds #soamerican
liamlawson30: This is so American of him
-> yourname: like he fits in so well!
lydianight: u'll have him in the american flag board shorts in no time
-> yourname: baby steps :///
user11: she really is in her lover girl era đ„ș
clairo: did you take him to the chipotle that is also a historic landmark downtown??
-> yourname: dude of COURSE i did. he said it was "interesting"
yourname added to their story!Â
#formula 1 x reader#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#formula one x reader#f1 smau#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen x you#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen#mv1 x reader#f1 texts#f1 fanfic#f1 social media au
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