#anon you're valid and also

[starlooping]

You will never be valid

you want to kiss me so bad it makes you look stupid

[radiomogai]

excuse me, you recently related a post with a tag asking if people remembered when people cared about recoining things and I’ve been thinking about it and I’m wondering if you meant that caring about recoining was good or bad?

We dislike re-coining. I don't have the spoons to explain the full part of it, but it mostly comes down to our more general criticisms of the extent of individualism in the MOGAI community (recoins, especially when they are of terms that have already been coined many times, often feel as though they are disregarding the contributions of other coiners, as well as ignoring the community symbol purpose of flags) and it feels disrespectful to the work of archivists. Every time we see another gender related to the song I/Me/Myself by Will Wood and nothing else, we feel like our work and our efforts in not only preventing terms from being lost as well as making them so easy to search for is, uh. Pointless. Not valued. We've spoken about this with some other archivists who have said they feel the same.

There are five (5) genders related to that song on our blog alone, by the way, and that's only counting the ones that have no other specifications. There are also five (5) related to the album Everything Is A Lot, and four (4) related to the song Thermodynamic Lawyer, and four (4) related to The Normal Album. Again, this is only counting ones without any other specifications, and are only the ones posted on our blog. This is a regular thing.

[stormyoceans]

i'm curious about one thing though, isn't it a bit meh to ship two people when one of them clearly finds it annoying/uncomfortable? although maybe that's just enemies to lovers excellence lol but i usually love enemies to lovers so idk why i don't ship junpo... it's not because of thamepo because i honestly find them a little bit boring for my taste but something about po being so (on the nose) whipped for thame doesn't let me enjoy junpo, you feel me?

i do get what you mean, po is so enamored with thame (and so annoyed by jun sfjksgfj) that for some people may be hard to imagine him ever developing feelings for jun, which is why in the context of the show i also tend to lean more towards a thame/po/jun poly (thamejun is very interesting to me too ngl), but at the same time i think part of the fun of shipping comes from the fact that it doesn't necessarily have to make perfect sense

canon gives us the framework, and within that, we can play with as many possibilities as we'd like, as long as they're interesting to us. this is something that i think fandom has lost a little over time, it seems to me that it has become a bit more rigid compared to when i was younger, but i've personally shipped characters who didn't even interact with each other (like, EVER) just because i thought their dynamic would be fun (shout-out to jayfoei, those bitches truly had me moving differently)

so to me, it's not that hard to imagine junpo somehow happening, but maybe it's because im also very biased towards jun and i don't read po as being uncomfortable with him. annoyed and frustrated as fuck due to a mix of a bad first impression, jun basically being his complete opposite, and po not being able to understand jun's intentions? sure. but uncomfortable? not really, and i think the proof of this is that po is ready to praise jun when jun isn't there to hear him, he doesn't mind touching jun or jun touching him when thame isn't around to see them, and he willingly shared personal stuff with jun when they were trying to bring nano back to the group (which he didn't really have to do for the plan to work)

jun also brings out a side of po that we don't see with anyone else, not even with thame, at least not after the first episode. po is someone who tends to overthink and doubt himself a lot, and he often has a hard time speaking his mind (see: telling the vendor he wants only one sandwich now, for example), but he doesn't have that issue with jun, and sure, one could say that it's because he doesn't care about jun's feelings (although imho po is way too kind for that), or maybe it's because their dynamic allows po to be more open and more true to himself

also, if you think about it, in the first episode po started out disliking thame because he thought thame was like his ex, but then he got to learn about thame and what he truly felt and po's feelings for him started to change, so i don't see why that couldn't happen with jun too, especially since po has never seen jun being vulnerable (in po's eyes, jun is the smart one, the cunning one, the annoying one, the unbothered one, but what if he saw jun struggling and breaking down in front of him????? DELICIOUS)

so yeah, idk. they're obviously never going to happen in the show, and maybe in the next episode the writers are gonna be like SIKE. JUN NEVER LIKED PO. but they still remain a very compelling pair to me, and in my head it's not that hard to imagine a future where thamepo break up and po eventually falls for jun

for some people that may be unrealistic, for me it's not, and i think both point of views are valid. at the end of the day, fiction is our playground, and as long as we don't hurt anybody, we can play pretend with what it offers us in any way that sparks joy!!!!

[tea-and-secrets]

my secret is that i don't think i have a future. i'm turning 18 in a month, maybe by the time you post this ask i will already be 18 for a while, but well, im not there yet. i just finished high school kicking and screaming, literally thought i wouldn't survive it to the point i was considering ending it all several times, but i finished it. now what? now i know i have to go to uni but i also know i won't be able to make it through. i barely scraped by with high school and now my mental health is at an all time low (thought 2021 was my worst year but life is full of surprises) and if college is harder than high school like people say it is, then i'm just royally fucked. it does not help that i don't know who i want to be in life. i'm bilingual and have language skills, but if i study for a translator job then it's just like-- who even needs it? i live in russia. my country is in shambles and so is its economy and relationship with other countries. russia does not need a fucking translator because everybody hates it and for good reason. i can't imagine any future for myself here. when i was a kid it all seemed so clear to me, i would grow up and live with my best friend and be happy and have a job i love. now whenever i think of being grown up my mind just comes up blank. my best friend has probably forgotten that we ever wanted to live together, or they just left the idea behind because it was so childish and unrealistic. i feel like i've been drifting away from them as well as my entire friend group for the past 2 years. i'm autistic, so i just don't see the world the same way they do. i used to love being aroace before i realized it's distancing me from my friends, because now they all have partners or they're yearning for partners or talking about all the sex they've had and i just have nothing to add to the conversation. i don't smoke or drink, so i guess now i'm just not as interesting to hang out with as when we were all 15 and sober. so yeah. i guess i just dont know what im going to do or what's going to happen to me. i've spent the last few years feeling more and more isolated and sinking into depression. if i get into college, i don't know what it's going to do to me, but it makes me fear for my life. if i don't get into it, then i dont know what im going to do at all. maybe my real secret is that i was put on this earth to draw gay people and not like, have a life and relationships. oh well.

.

[shurisneakers]

Hiii, first of all I read your works like twice now and you're aMAZEing🩷 I don't want to sound demanding, you do what you do, but can I ask when will be another chapter of Unsolved? I binge read it in like one night and I need to know what happens between the two of them🥹

hello my love! thank you so much, im so happy you enjoy them <3

tbh with just starting a full job and still having post-chemotherapy side effects and being like. depressed, i haven't had the energy to really write or even reply to comments, which sucks because people are so kind about unsolved.

ive gotten 2 chapters written. im just not very convinced they're any good, which is why i haven't posted them. also making memes takes more brain power than writing, i am simply not that kind of funny 😭

im trying though, so hopefully this weekend something will happen 🤞

[khaoala]

Here I'm desperately hoping THK will be a superfun escape from reality 🙏🏻 the way things have gone in my country in the last two days. Who's wishing for it to be dark and serious? 😭 My life is enough dark and serious.

ATTENTION! rant ahead. anon, i'm really sorry i used your ask for this, but when i realized i went on a tangent, it was already too late. i do eventually answer your comment in the last two paragraphs, tho.

i personally use these silly little shows and interact so much with what these actors who live so far from my own reality because i want to use it as an escape route!

i'll be honest and say i don't remember when or how i switched back to asian media after spending a long time only watching western stuff, but i do know i made the switch because queer stories in western media were either a) being cancelled after one season, or b) having tragic/unfulfilling endings for poc/queer characters. I DON'T WANT THAT.

and imagine my surprise in like june of 2023 when i was looking up things to watch and stumbled over a silly little thai show about a loser who can go back in time with his crystal ball, and he tries to win over this girl he has been interested in forever and ends up falling for the guy who he saw as his rival? and ofc be my favorite had a lot of social commentary and personally, i think one of the most beautiful self-discovery journeys to this day in thai bl, but they had a happy ending, and they had an arc, and a story and it was a lot more than any western show could ever dream of giving me (am i saying thai shows, or gmm shows are perfect? no, i know its faults. what i am saying is that as a queer person living in south america, i wish i had these type of things to watch growing up. hayley kiyoko's girls like girls videoclip was the first time i remember seeing two young women kiss and let it be romantic and not fetichization.)

pluto's lastest episode about how non-inclusive the urban environment is for people with disabilities left such an impression they removed the sign that blocked the ada path. THESE STORIES MATTER!

and these stories matter even when they are silly romcoms about assassins brothers falling in love with two dudes, or about an introverted girl who just moved to the big city and hides her identity to flirt with the pretty and popular girl from her class, or about a grumpy veterinarian who suffers an accident and switches bodies with his sister and now he has to go on a country journey to get his body back with his former best friend he's in love with.

so yes, anon, i also hope this will be a fun show you can escape to and have that dose of serotonin even if for just an hour or two of your day. and i hope that even if it makes us cry, you'll be able to cry and allow yourself to let your worries out without feeling guilty about it. that's the magic of storytelling in my opinion, and i have an inkling we'll be up to a very good one that will play with our feelings like a roller-coaster.

(also, i can't understand who says they didn't see the comedy of thk when we literally had bison telling his brother kant wants his body first and his heart second, or when style tells fadel his nipples are sensitive and fadel just pinches it with a padlock (?), or kant telling his best friend "hey if you get together with this scary killer dude, i'll give you my dad's car" and style says yes, like come on.)

[skrunksthatwunk]

skrunk did you know your marking on shinigami eyes changed from friendly to anti

yeah i've been told. it's bc i reblog stuff about transandrophobia and intersexism and exorsexism and these things are thought to be transmisogynistic (they're not, it's just other people discussing their oppression). if it makes you uncomfortable (which is totally understandable) feel free to search around my blog, but i don't think you'll find anything all that objectionable there

[self-dx-culture-is]

Self dx culture is unmasking more as a cry for help so that people will recognise that there's something wrong with you and then immediately regretting it when they have a bad reaction. But also feeling validated because if it freaks them out then at least that's proof you're not just deluding yourself. - 🐦‍⬛

.

[simplydnp]

Stop im rewatching why dan is leaving me bc of ur post theyre so disgustingly domestic i adore them

sometimes i watch that video just to feel something

[iliveinprocrasti-nationn]

I think some people call adhd meds "life saving" because they can help them stop feeling suicidal. I know that doesn't apply to everyone but I have two friends who become suicidal if they're not on their adhd meds because theirs is so severe it becomes life ruining. I've also had a trans friend say their hormones are life saving. I don't think any of them mean to invalidate medications for physical function/life. But I understand how it might seem dramatic or inconsiderate.

I definitely understand that, and, in your friends' cases, I don't necessarily think it's dramatic. I think my frustration comes less with the different conversations on how helpful and crucial different meds can be - because those conversations, whether about lifesaving meds or not, are still important - and more about how these situations play out in terms of intra-community conversations.

In my opinion, there needs to be a separation of the language and terms used for different conversations around medications. When people speak about lifesaving medication, it's because we will die without them no matter what. The medication is the thing keeping us alive. You mentioned your friends described their meds as life saving because their adhd without them is life ruining - that's the difference I think. Their condition may be life ruining, but the people who take lifesaving meds have conditions that will be life ending. There's a separation there.

People with chronic illnesses or disabilities who rely on lifesaving medications have level of severity to our experiences which other people simply can't understand. They just can't. Not in the same way as all of us who experience it. When we have conversations about that, it's an entirely different situation from people whose medications are important in the way you're talking about. It's not that we try to say medications which aren't lifesaving in the literal sense aren't important. It's that, at least on my end, I'm frustrated that people are trying to recontextualize this term.

When I have conversations with other people taking lifesaving medications about our meds, having people try and join the conversation when they simply don't have the experience to understand feels... a bit demeaning, I think. Then, when we point out they don't have the same experiences and can't meaningfully add on to the conversation without changing the topic, we then have people trying to change the meaning of the term. Before this recontextualization began, we had the term "lifesaving medications" for a reason, and it refers to something literal. Our bodies shut down without our meds. We will die if we don't have them. It's frustrating when people try to redefine terms in disability spaces that refer to specific experiences (lifesaving medications, paralysis, etc.). If people want to observe intra-community conversations when they don't have the life experience to contribute, if one topic makes them think of something relating to their own life and start their own, separate conversation about that, I have no issue. If a term doesn't exist for your experience, feel free to make one. But changing the meanings of our terms is a disservice.

[unhingedkinfessions]

hi hi !!! its me again <3 kin walmart anon :)

after reading other peoples experiences, ive gotta talk about something that ive noticed is a pretty common thing amongst certain types of kin servers. and thats just… blacklists that are both user compiled and extremely strict.

this never made sense to me. especially if said blacklist is 400 miles long and has some of the wackiest shit on it. i actually still have access to the one from kin walmart, here are some of my favs:

- the word “bounce”

- the phrase “bouncing ball”

- mother mentions (all forms: mom, mother, etc)

- oranges (the fruit)

- school/mentions of schoolwork

- therapy

- Talking about private conversations/going to have a private conversation in a public setting

- any mention of the ocean

-

im also going to say, blacklists are fine. user compiled blacklists are okay but… i think there should be a better way to manage them. especially in spaces that have 100+ members. no hate to anyone who has these triggers either. i just think that there’s a line. there should be a line. and most times, ive found that the line is nonexistent. it should be up to user’s specifically to adjust their experience accordingly. im so sorry that i want to talk about the bouncing ball i stole from dollar general, maybe just dont read the conversation.

i understand that this take can be somewhat controversial, its why i don’t… talk about it without hiding behind anonymity. but i think, especially in kin spaces, blacklists are almost… idk.. taken advantage of?

idk this ended up being more rambly than intended, i just love talking about kin walmart and some of the whacky shit that went on there. stay tuned for our next episode; kin home depot

- kin walmart anon

NO YOU'RE SO RIGHT IS THE THING. there is a point where you need to be responsible for yourself and not place the responsibility/blame on others for not remembering every trigger on a mile long blacklist. you have to know when to step away from a conversation if there's a topic that triggers or upsets you, not demand everyone else conform to You. especially if it's extremely specific (such as the bounce example you gave) or extremely vague and frequently mentioned (moms, school, etc.). there's a lot of issues with those kinds of things and if you're in a Public space with lots of people, you gotta be responsible for your own well-being. it's different if it's a smaller group of friends, of course. there's a difference between 'friends' who continuously overstep your boundaries/comfort and large servers where people are just going to make general discussion about whatever.

the amnt of servers ive been in w mile-long user-compiled blacklists where people throw a gd Fit if you so much as allude to one of the 5000 "problematic medias" theyve put on the bl.... ok not that much actually cuz im thinking of one example in particular i was in multiple servers w. but you know. and a lot of shit can just be like. squicks or stuff they don't like, rather than something that will genuinely trigger them.

i swear some kinnies just can't manage big servers in general. once i was in a server of at Least 100 members - that was not even a kin server, it was for smth else but had a lot of kinnies - where there weren't any like, actual chat moderators (just some ppl who had permissions for unrelated reasons). there was a user-compiled blacklist that was rarely updated w requests, and one day out of boredom & frustration with the lack of organization, i went and sorted the long ass list by Category and Alphabetically. i was not even a mod i just DID THAT. the admins of that server sucked so bad they didn't know how to manage anything and were generally some of the worst people on the planet.

[stormyoceans]

you're definitely onto something because it all feels so rushed and "fake"... like someone with dylan's personality wouldn't magically be fine with everything all of a sudden, he could be such a complex and great character and i was expecting him to! but alas... this feels like a show for children where conflict just doesn't make sense and gets resolved by the power of friendship or something lol also some ppl on twitter are making good criticism and very good points (mostly band fans) but they are getting attacked which 🤦🏻‍♀️ anyway you're not alone in that, it's gmmtv after all

NOW WHY WOULD PEOPLE ATTACK SOMEONE JUST FOR SHARING THEIR OPINION ON A PIECE OF MEDIA ✋😭

like i understand. reading criticism about something you love is never easy, which why i tend to keep my more negative opinions to myself or at least not put them in the main tags, because i don't want to make people feel bad for liking something, however i think we really need to stop equating criticism with hate, especially if it's constructive criticism that's being talked about without any malicious intent behind it

thamepo, for example, has a lot of strengths – it's a visually gorgeous show, william and est have great chemistry, the romantic moments make you feel butterflies in your stomach and are built on thame and po getting to know each other – but i do personally believe it's falling short when it comes to storytelling and character building

i mean, the show is called thamepo, so i knew from the beginning that the romance between them was gonna be the focus of the show rather than mars as a group, however i did expect their relationship to slowly develop along with the two of them trying to get the group back together, and for the members to still play a major role in the series and in thame's growth as a character, but 4/5 of the group has already reconciled and we're only at episode 4

and you know, i don't think this would be as much of an issue if i felt like we got to know each member properly and the reconciliation between them and thame felt earned, but i don't and it doesn't: pepper suddenly appeared like nothing ever happened, and dylan's story got told by jun rather than by dylan himself (and as i mentioned in my tags i could also talk about how it feels like the writers refused to let any of them make any real mistake and be a little bit of an asshole but it would get too long so i won't)

as i said, it's ONLY episode 4, so there's still time to get to know the characters, but at the same time it does feel like there have been a lot of missed opportunities, and if i were a big fan of lykn i would definitely be at least a little bit disappointed rn, so i think people expressing that or even giving some criticism is perfectly understandable

ANYWAY. we'll see how things go from here, and in the meantime im glad to know im not alone in this, so thank you for your message, anon!!!!!

[goldenpinof]

@ anons about Phil and next tour: i'm not airing that, at least now

[bananonbinary]

there isn't like. some kind of officially-accessible Government Record of diagnosis somewhere, is there? I was diagnosed with autism as a little kid but between moving like 5 times, at some point my parents lost my medical records and started fresh, and they decided to just not tell future doctors i was autistic, so it's not on my current medical record with my current PCP. and I've kind of been assuming that it's not going to cause me any problems? but idk how it works, do you think there's a way that that old official DX might catch up with me somehow?

oh no, it's not as dire as all that, i didn't mean to fearmonger. also to be fair a lot of the situations it can work against you in are fairly specific? as others have pointed out, adopting children or getting custody can be harder, because we have to work AGAINST the assumption that we're helpless. and apparently some countries like new zealand can reject immigration applications if they deem you "a high cost to the health system," whatever the hell that means.

these fears are true of ANY disability diagnosis though, not just autism. it's just the ongoing struggle to justify our right to, you know, have rights.

it's not something that is likely to interfere unless you volunteer that information to people who might abuse it though (people making big legal decisions about you like social security agents, i mean), and if it's not in your current medical records, you're definitely fine.

[unboundtravels]

+ One, are you actually proud of your accomplishments?

+ 𝐓𝐑𝐔𝐓𝐇𝐅𝐔𝐋 𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒 | Accepting

She's blasting Mozart's Symphony No. 25 in G Minor from the TARDIS speakers as she works on repairs whilst her crew takes some time to enjoy actually landing somewhere pleasant for once. She rubs sweat off her brow, eyebrow twitching with something as she hears a voice. Blinking softly, she looks up from her soot-covered work and her loosened blouse. Truly, The Doctor is in her full garage head stage of life, where all she wants to do is work on the console and blast Mozart. 

"EH!?" 

"Accomplishments?" She wiggled her nose, "Accomplishment. Singular." She exhales, looking back to the TARDIS and digging her hands into the roots. "I have one accomplishment." She stopped, setting the tool down. She rested her hands in her waistcoat pockets as she exhaled. 

"Stella. My granddaughter." She sighs, "She's a very prideful and... rebellious young woman, but..." Her gaze softens, "I am very proud of her, despite how hardheaded I can be... In... In my old age." She mumbled quietly, "I've worked very hard to keep her safe... from our people. One day they... they may find us, and I don't want them to harm her. Not in the way they'd harm me for my... transgressions." She moved to stare at the TARDIS console.

"I often... wonder if... Perhaps... She has begun taking more care of me then... I have of her."

Her brows furrow in sudden discomfort over the realization that she might be a burden on Stella.

[catboyrightsdefender]

that post about fan mail got me scrolling through my inbox and looking at all my 134 unanswered asks and im. feeling so sad now