#anon u are so funny for this
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I think the poll lacks another very possible option: all of lovesquare are dating. No angst abouf it. Evil? No issues dating multiple people at the same time
AKDJKSJSJ ethicallly non monogamous evil love square dating on every side
(or unethically because yknow,,, they’re evil)
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Can you draw something with Doom Patrol!Edwin and Netflix!Edwin?
Maybe something about Dp!Edwin talking about his feelings for Charles with N!Edwin?
It's just something I've been thinking of, make it a little angsty?<3
Glad you asked
ko-fi
#ask ask ask#dead boy detectives#dbda#payneland#edwin x charles#doom patrol#dead patrol#cw homophobia#i know there are a couple of people who enjoy my rambly tags so these are for u#first of all anon i'm sorry i used your request to continue my story lol#most of my comics are meant to be standalones BUT#the doom patrol and dead girl detectives are all happening in the same universe#and there is indeed series of events here!#this particular one is happening after dp!edwin's feelings were exposed but before they met the girls#with that out of the way#i know this is not as funny as most of my stuff#but dp!edwin's internalized homophobia is an important thign that can't just go away because his charles loves him back#and he does love him back! in this verse#dp!charles is the only one not struggling with his feelings for his partner#dbd!charles and charlotte still have ways to go#also dbd!edwin is in no way an expert in self-acceptance but he has learned some things#i considered having him mention simon but i decided it wasn't his place to out him#(even though he's dead u know)#so yeah what he says here isn't... great#he's still putting himself down and he's still not sure if his feelings for charles are actually a good thing#but he knows HE is glad he feels this way#because fuck it it's not like he'll go to hell for it#and even if he did... he would crawl his way out
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hi daycare attendants,,,,, can you draw me a picture
bit of an inflated ego you've got there, sun
...at least he's having fun? guess both of them like drawing the outdoors!
#bun arts#DCA inbox adventures#<- tag for this series!!#dca fandom#fnaf sun#fnaf moon#dca sun#dca moon#isnt it so funny how they both chose to draw the outdoors. something they've never seen before#they yearn for something they'll never have!!#man im so glad i can show my interpretations of the DCA through this!! im having so much fun#thank u anons ur giving me the opportunity to do smth i've wanted to do for a long long time!!!!!
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Requested by Anonymus ❤️
#tvedit#ropedit#userthing#userelenagilbert#tolkienedit#popcultureds#filmtvtoday#haladrielcentral#tropedit#cinemapix#userlysandra#haladrieledit#rings of power#saurondrieledit#ringsofpowerdaily#otp: bind yourself to me#charlie vickers#morfydd clark#payidaresque.gif#MORFYDD'S EXPLANATION#I AM ROLLING ON THE FLOOR#pls they are so effortlessly funny SKSKKSKSKSKKSKSKSKSK#also THE KING HAS SPOKEN#haladriel it is#thank u charlie for helping me solve this dilemma#god i love them so much#thank u anon this one was a delight to make LMAOOOO
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if its no trouble could you draw a balding jax? :o i would love to see him balding from the top of his pretty purple head!!! just specifically on top of it thank you
I... hope i delivered
#i keeled over laughing when i got this ask btw#anon idk who u are but ur funny i like u#my art#tadc#his heads so shiny#jax#jax tadc#tadc jax#the amazing digital circus#shitpost#banana asks#for you#fyp
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uuuh love the kook!best friend idea??? the trio would be so overprotective of her??? at keggers she would just make small talk with some pogues and they'll be 🧍♂️🧍♂️🧍♂️like right next to her!
- 🔮
rafe is getting weirdly possessive over you, you think for a moment, standing near the keg and waiting patiently for your turn to get a drink. you don't think he's ever been so.... territorial. or maybe he has been, and you've just been ignoring it, thinking that he's been a really good, really close friend—looking out for you the way he does.
you can feel eyes burning holes into the back of your head, three sets of eyes in particular. your friends are funny—charmingly stupid, annoying arrogant, and a whole host of other things, but they've always been funny. it's why you guys get along so well, you return their jokes and comments at the same pace, more often than not even cracking jokes that make rafe break his stoic facade.
but he has been, you reflect, stepping up to whichever pogue is pouring the beer today—breaking his facade. you thought you were going a little crazy, thinking that he's actually being nicer to you, until kelce and top comment on it too. even today, he picked you up from your place first, letting you crawl into the front seat even though the other boys complain about being smushed in the back endlessly. he complimented your dress, even asked if it was new, which it was. he even got you your first drink without you asking for it, the strawberry seltzer that you're sure the pogues hosting didn't have lying around.
you feel surprisingly giddy about it—after all, you're still a girl, still their newer friend. like any other girl, you worry your new friends won't like you or that there's some ulterior motive going on. rafe's being a little weird, but he's always thinking about something that he doesn't talk about until days later. you think it'll pass like it always does.
"ah, ah," the blond pogue boy says—the cute one some of your girl friends buy weed from occasionally, when rafe can't deliver. "what's the magic word?"
you giggle at his antics, your worry about rafe floating away. you keep chatting with him, reaching in for the red cup twice, that he pulls up and over his head—impossible for you to grasp.
fifteen feet away, rafe watches jj tease you with the beer cup, jaw clenching while top and kelce see what he's staring at.
"see, boys. now that is not okay." he gestures to you with the cup in his own hand, watching your tiny dress ride up as you jump to get your beer from jj. "that pogue is disrespectin' our girl."
"rafe, i think it's just a joke-" top interjects, but he gets interrupted himself.
"nah, nah, man. these pogues. they think it's funny. i'll show him funny. c'mon." rafe stalks over, and the two boys follow. you don't notice but jj does, lowering the cup and staring at something—or someone—behind you.
"havin' fun, huh?" rafe questions, and you spin around. the jerk scared you—kelce and top surrounding you like bodyguards.
"guys, what are you-"
"i think she's all set, pogue. you can fuck off now."
"don't you have some store to rob?"
"guys, c'mon, it's a beer-"
"it's alright, princess, i see these three musketeers have an issue, so i'll just catch you around, hm?"
jj walks away, leaving the beer he poured for you on the log. you smile apologetically at him, fist clenching in anger at your stupid, stupid friends.
"you idiots. what the hell was that? i can't even talk to someone now-"
"what the hell's that mean, i'll catch you around?" rafe says, cutting you off. "you talkin' to that pogue?"
you pick up the beer and splash it over rafe's head.
"no, you asshole. it's a figure of speech and we live on the same island. jesus christ."
#lowkey shes so funny#shes not taking rafes shit n also has no idea hes in luv w her#THIS WAS SO FUN TO WRITE!#im sure no one cares but this plot<3333 im dead#📮 asks#hi angel missed u#🔮 anon#rafe cameron#kook trio reader
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at a concerrttt yyessss yessss
klapollo >:3
design notes
link to masterpost || some quick justifcations/explanations below cut!!:
Birds of paradise <333 Them being of the same bird family is important to me... (honorary mention to the snowy owl for Kristoph) (also honorable mention to the paradise crow) (but i like them having matching ribbons (and the two birds i went with are more closely related))
I originally tried giving Klav the whole fluffy back of yellow/white feathers, but (a) he looked SO over complicated (especially compared to everyone else) and (b) I realized that no other character has back feathers, anyways. so it would make sense he does not either.
The ribbon-tails are similar to Apollo and Trucy's hearts: they both inherit this feature from one of their parents. (One parent is a stephanie's astrapia, one is a lesser bird-of-paradise). (Also of note: the lesser bird-of-paradise also has two long wire plumes, if you look closely)
Tails: (Klav's is basically a ribbon-tailed astrapia's tail btw.) Because the tail is such a notable feature of these species, I'm including it, though they also come from the base of the wing (though I'll probably just draw them as essentially tails in the future), and are much shorter than they would be, were they proportional.
i got very lazy on the individual introduction sheets they're so bad 😭😭 specifically klavier pls just imagine he and his wings look better there 🙏���🙏 LOL i hope the other drawings make up for it !! >:3
FINALLY MY CAT!!!! it’s been a while,,, this is him everyday after taking his pills cuz he knows it’s milk time now (image from my dad) (also flat colors and zoom bc me likey this image)
#ace attorney#aa4 spoilers#klavier gavin#kristoph gavin#apollo justice#klapollo#ace avian#okart#funny story#i got so excited from that ask where an anon talked about klav at a show#that i started drawing it before even finalizing what bird he was#and how the back feathers looked#so i had to go back and redo some of it rip#anyways these were a lot of fun#next few drawings for this au might just be some character interactions ive been thinking about#(and a couple asks !! im not ignoring u guys i swear)#(also maybe godot)#anyways this one is mostly just two drawings of klavier LOL with a little other stuff sprinkled in#i have no regrets#this one is for u klavier nation
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katsuki is such a deep sleeper but once you move to leave the bed suddenly he’s up
asking slurred questions: “w’s wrong? cant sleep?” while trying to grab you and get you back into bed
you just answer “‘m gettin water katsuki lemme go” all groany trying to get out of his hold
he doesn’t let go easy but once he does he follows you through the house into the kitchen. you get yourself a nice cold water bottle with condensation around it(AGGHHH) and drink. like the creep he is he stares at you but you can’t notice bc he’s wrapped himself around your back. you offer his some water and he downs the rest(greedy loser). then you both go back to bed, which katsuki decides to pull you in close and never let go(even if you die of thirst)
anyway love you caitie❤️❤️
All that intense hero training and a whole. entire. war. just for him to be able to go from dead-to-the-world and Snoring to ... ready to run a mile after you around the house..........
Even if all you gotta do is pee, too... you're coming back to bed all groggy eyed to find his wide open, like he was just sitting there, making sure you were going to the bathroom and Nothing Else. Cuz you're right, if it's water, then he's right there beside you the whole time and drinking the whole thing on the way back upstairs (that is, after you manage to get him to let go of your wrist and stop all the get back in bed-ing...for someone who complains about your whining, he's surprisingly? Unsurprisingly? no better).
Please, please, please, for his sake, just keep a full water cup by the side of your bed and make sure to use the bathroom right before laying down, too (even if he's whining about how long you take then also) just so you can stayed wrapped up with him for the max amount of time possible🥺🥺🥺 Doesn't that seem like the best solution?
(^^ don't tell him I snitched, but bakugo told me to write that last bit, btw)
Love u more, anon!!🩷🩷🩷
#bakugo#not to get off topic but i swear by the tumbler i keep by my bed#i need it#anyway ur so right and it's so funny how needy desperate this guy is#is kinda offended when you dont ask him where he's going when he gets up to p*ss ........#but tbh u do notice but his weight shifts the WHOLE BED#meanwhile you just breathe out and he's like. making sure ur okay lmao#ajsdfhalksdjhfkasjd#at least he cares right?#was gonna say something else too i forget tho#THANKS FOR THIS THO ANON MWAH#caitie answers#gen#anon
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why r sugurus and satorus manspread so NYYYASSTTYYYYYYY 😭😭 these bitches be takin up the whole space like close those legs damn
ANON I UNDERSTAND YOUR GRIEVANCES BUT PLEASE SAVE IT FOR SUGURU….. satoru manspreads occasionally but most of the time he sits like a dainty little princess, LOOK AT THIS MAN.
WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS……
#sugu being a canonical manspreader is so……#hhhhhhhhhh#i need to sit in his lap 😔#sorry. i need to though#i get what u mean though anon…. i’m constantly thinking abt that One official gojo art where he’s manspreading 😵💫😵💫😵💫#i do find it funny how he usually sits crosslegged even though he always takes up sm space#while sugu is like . the Polite one but he’s never not manspreading LMAO#they’re so…. yeah#insufferable men!!!!#ask tag ✩
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hii!! I just read cold spots and it was AMAZING!!! Im not sure if you wanted to continue the fic, but if you don’t mind could you continue with Veres part? I don’t know what you would write about but I just feel like that fic has so much potential to be a little 3 part series or something 🙏
<- Cold Spots TYSM ANON!! I put the Vere End at the beginning for ease of reading. For the sake of folks who would like to read this as a stand-alone... I think u can? With the knowledge that the premise of Cold Spots is that Mhin and MC/Sparrow went ghost hunting. Vere is said to have been responsible for a handful of local ghost stories, so…of course he makes some mischief.🦊 Also MC needs some Winter wear, stat. A very light Possessive Vere warning in this btw, though perhaps in a roundabout way. Plausible deniability is so important to him.
You putter around in your room at the Wet Wick as you go about your nightly routine. The occasional cheer or thud from below only accentuates your nervous energy, punctuating your reluctance to settle down and get into bed. You smooth the covers with your bandaged hands and fluff the pillow before extinguishing the lamplight. You tug the bedding up above your shoulders, fighting to get comfortable. As your eyelids finally start to droop, the flicker of a shadow catches your attention. It dances and sways and bends and grows until suddenly it is right in front of you. On top of you. Silken, blood red drips down onto your face, a knife gleam smile too close for comfort. You breathe in a gasp, wondering if you should scream. “Vere, what–” “Shhh,” he coos, pressing a finger lightly to your lips. His breath is hot against your skin. “I only came to keep you warm, pet.”
Heat Signature
“Poor thing.” Vere purrs. “Your lips are so cold.” He leans ever closer, his mouth hot over yours–hovering. His other hand reaches for your face as well, nails trailing against your cheek in a teasing caress.
You feel even the thought of being cold leave your body, replaced instead by the unusual thrill he commands, that strange enthralling sway.
That heat you’ve come to associate with Vere; sweet tendrils of want that nestle in your bloodstream.
You squirm a little, though you can’t move much with him looming over you.
(You should probably do more to protest his intrusion into your room, you think to yourself, though, the majority of you is–curious, daresay even far too eager to–)
“Whatever trouble did you get up to that left you in such a state?”
At this you scoff, tilting your head back into the pillow and effectively knocking Vere’s finger from your lips.
“As if you don’t know,” you accuse.
Vere looks entirely unperturbed by you shaking him off, his lithe fingers traveling freely along the newly displayed skin of your throat, making your pulse jump.
Vere chuckles at that, dark and silky.
“Being tight lipped about your adventures, hm?” He angles your face just so, ensuring you meet his sharp eyes, his nose brushing up against yours. “Not that it matters. It so happens I do know what you’ve been up to. Trespassing in places that don’t belong to you.”
“...It was an abandoned building. I don’t think it really belonged to anyone.”
“And that’s where you’d be wrong,” Vere says, “everything in this city belongs to someone, darling. You just don’t know what belongs to who yet.” He peers down at you with laughter in his expression, though there's a distinct edge to it that you can't quite place.
“So, you're here because that building belongs to you...?”
“Hmm, amongst other things. However shall I make you apologize to me for this most egregious offense?” He asks airily, shifting until he’s beside you rather than perched over you, resting his cheek in his hand and letting his eyes slip closed. He's the absolute picture of unbothered leisure.
(You’re not fooled–he’s simply waiting for you to let your guard down before he pounces.)
You open your mouth to deny any debts on your part (though, if your ghost hunting spot was indeed Vere’s hideout, you really do feel guilty) but Vere cuts you off before you can speak.
“Alas, I suppose it’s not mine anymore. Within a week it will reek of wet dogs and cheap booze. It's a lost cause now that those drooling reprobates know it's inhabitable. A pity. By Eridia's standards it really was divine in its heyday. Good wine, music, dancing. There was this portrait artist who would paint the performances…”
His tone remains light as he reminisces. But the look he pins you with is dangerous: his eyes gleaming bright, his canines bared in an irreverent grin.
“I had such hopes and dreams of reviving the place myself. Some of the dances were very scandalous. You never did share with me your stance on dancing, did you?”
You stumble out an approximate answer. It’s…harmless information to give, isn’t it?
Though, judging by how pleased Vere looks, you wonder if you should have refused to say. He looks positively wicked as he ponders your answer aloud. “Oh, I’m sure you’ve got plenty of talents to share. In another life, perhaps I'd have put you on stage. Though, I admit. I find myself partial to a private show.”
And–as expected–the moment you let your guard down, he's in your space again, crowding you. Heat and proximity and the softest brush of his lips against yours, light enough to send a thrill down your spine, curiosity and a want so deep it surprises you.
“Well?” He purrs. “Care to audition?”
You can't hide behind the excuse of supernatural sway or charm or the thrall of hypnotic sunglo eyes. It's not Vere's power that controls you. It's your own gnawing desire; starvation and longing that draws you to him despite all sense.
Kissing Vere is heady. Dizzying.
Kissing Vere is like being in conversation with Vere–a constant of giving and taking, being chased after and running to keep up. It’s enticing and alluring and decadent and never quite enough, over too soon even as you feel yourself losing air, the rush of blood and sensation threatening to overwhelm you.
He gives a parting nip to your bottom lip as he pulls away.
Then another one, playful, to your jaw.
When he presses his face into the side of your neck, you expect him to bite again.
What you don’t expect is for him to nuzzle into you, inhaling deeply before heaving a great sigh, his tail flopping lazily to land across you with a thump.
He’s officious as he rearranges the covers, ensuring your arms are tucked carefully away from him before he’s willing to fully settle into the bedding, pulling the blankets up around the both of you like a den. He hums something low in his chest as he tucks himself up alongside you, long tail curled around your waist.
It’s rhythmic–
purring.
And it’s…soothing, actually.
The weight of him, the warmth. The incessant lamplight of the Amaryllis District, shining ever present through your window, is dim–tolerable, even, courtesy of Vere's magnificent shadow manipulations and the blankets sheltering you.
The constant noise seems to fade away as well, obscured by the sound of purring. “Falling asleep when you have me in your bed, pet? You really do try your luck…”
#Foxes purr btw!#i await more purring Vere fics I hold out my sickly little claws for them (a prompt from me for other fic writers)#You and I get to know that Vere was touching on Sparrow’s face sm bc he caught a peek at Mhin doing it in Cold Spots#and he got territorial#I decided that the narrative pointing it out was laying it on too heavy. but you and i know.#Hopefully this fits the bill ok of what u described anon! A liiittle spice but mostly wholesome??#i’m ngl I was going for more spice but ...Deicide!Flavored Vere... he took all of it#AAA SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG THO ANON AAAAuuughghhh#also ur so right anon u gotta have a sequel (since I was talking about horror tropes lol)#the thought of Vere & Mhin being down bad for the same person is sooo funny to me btw. i think of it often.#vere x reader#touchstarved x reader#toxintouch writing#touchstarved game fanfic#no pillow fight i'm osrry#this fic. fought me. this fic stole my wallet in the denny's parking lot#toxintouch: {pick} prompt {your poison}#wtf tumblr why did u do this to my image i thought i got my dimensions right the file can't be that big...#i have 2 ways of choosing titles btw on the nose and “you'll have to google this/have me explain”
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kjsr w a tengu reader PLEASEE begs at ur feet like how u would beg for feixiao
reader teaches her how to fly and maybe occasionally reader casually js picks her up and carried her in the sky while flying for shitz and giggles
-🇮🇩 anon
??? absolutely unprovoked callout ??? you're right, but like ??? (/j)
anyway, i had a long think about this ask and honestly. i can see sara being somewhat intimidated by a tengu!reader actually. because for all that sara is biologically tengu, for most of her life she was raised by humans. she's always been too tengu to be properly human, though, so when she meets tengu!reader, she's afraid she'll be too human to be tengu. because of this i think she'll keep quite a professional distance from reader at first, and it'll take a lot of effort and work on reader's part to get her to open up.
assuming sara really can't fly, i think her meeting tengu!reader who can will make her feel both an intense longing but also an almost unbearable shame. it's something so natural to a tengu, flight; those wings on her back aren't fake. and yet, the sky has always been out of her reach. when she confesses to reader that she can't fly she'll feel like she's speaking with glass in her mouth. she probably doesn't expect reader to offer to teach her, but her heart stutters in her chest when they do. and if she does learn how to fly thanks to reader's help, it'll be something sara cherishes until the day she dies. when she thinks of the sky she'll think of an endless blue and the sound of your laughter carrying in the wind.
#sev.responses#🇮🇩 anon#kujou sara x reader#ik u intended this to be a funny-ish ask anon but unfortunately i had brainworms#i think about her so much. every time i escape the thoughts i look to her standee on my desk and i start thinking again
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ghost balls
I hope you’re satisfied
#ghost#ghost COD#cod fanart#this isn’t even fanart let’s be real#COD shitposting#this is a shitpost#anon who are u#where go u get the ghall#get it#like gall#lmao I’m so funny#laugh#please laugh#Ask Answered
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Infinite makes a Sonadow amv to Everytime We Touch and forces Sonic to watch it repeatedly
lmao. yeah
#infinite the jackal#eggman#sonic the hedgehog#sonadow#kinda#answers#my art#sorry this has been sitting in my asks for a while i HAD to draw it#i love sonadow i love infinite BEING a sonadow shipper. just like me fr#but god this being the months of torture that sonic goes through is so so so funny#thank u anon ur right
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first off, so panthers fans aren't freaking out, show the camera your left hand... your right hand too. // all good. i have both.
#aleksander barkov#sasha barkov#florida panthers#panthers#nhl#nhledit#hockey#hockeyedit#meg.cats#meg.gif#meg.all#scp24#he is SOOOO FUNNY.........#'i have both' i actually laughed and not even just in a fond way like he is genuinely funny.....#also you know what. seeing his left hand DID comfort me. lmfao#also also. lighting was horrendous. he is using a terrible little webcam. i did my best it's still meh </3#but mr. selke himself is soooo cute so. WAHHHHHH#anon <3 here u go!!#tysm for sending me the vid link you actually saved my life
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hiiii! the anon who requested the Mike x fem!reader fic here. please don't apologise, I can totally understand😭😭 the show's too addictive, I binged watched the first few seasons really quick too, you can take your time🫶🏾
HII IM SO SORRY FHIS TOOK SO LONG GRR. honestly, i really struggled w this 😭 i didn’t make it very long or defined (i wanted this to set the tone of their relationship), and i left it pretty open ended (on purpose) so it could be built off of in other continuations as maybe a clientsdaughter!reader 🙂↕️thank u sm for the ask & i hope u enjoy!! (this is ass)
mike ross x fem!clientsdaughter!reader
mike had learned a countless amount of knowledge since joining the firm. how to talk to people, how to negotiate, how to work, how to win. along with this, he also learned the workings of the office itself — more so the people that were in it.
kyle talks to his girlfriends throughout the day. it’s often mike can catch him leaned back in his chair, not-so-discreetly checking his phone, eyebrows raising as he clicks on the selfie he was sent.
louis keeps his favorite breakfast bars in the top cabinet. rachel chews her lip when she’s thinking. the fax machine only listens to donna — don’t mention if harvey’s having a bad hair day, he knows.
oh. and don’t sleep with clients.
not getting involved with clients was a general rule of thumb. according to harvey, the less emotion involved, the better. even so, harvey himself was guilty of sleeping with a few clients — after business was done, of course. but that was different. harvey was harvey, and mike was a first year associate, already tap dancing on thin ice. he could absolutely not afford to break any rules — no matter how unspoken they might be.
truly, it was all going fine. until he met you.
you & your father are in the racehorse industry. famous for the record breaking times your horses submit (& the world-class conditions they’re always in), thousands come to the races to bet on them. your family has been breeding, training, and racing horses for decades, and your father loves his job. there’s only one issue.
he’s currently being sued for ��wrongful termination” by an ex employee. the employee mistreated multiple horses during his time working for you & your father. once you both found out, he was gone.
now, 4 months later, when your most famous horse “knights honor” has died, the employee is claiming the horse was milkshaked before his races (he was not).
“Milkshaked? What the hell is that?”
harvey’s voice carried through his office as jessica presented the case to him & mike. your father was a friend to her, and it was important that harvey got this done. mike remembers the article he read years ago on racehorses when knights honor won his first championship.
“In the context of horse racing and illegal substances, a milkshake is any compound or combination of compounds administered to a horse, pre-race, for the purpose of causing.. metabolic alkalosis of the blood and extracellular fluid of that horse. Although, a previous widely used method to ensure placing times, milkshakes are a prohibited practice on race day in all U.S. jurisdictions.”
harvey and jessica exchange looks between themselves & mike. they're about to raise questions when donna's voice crackles through harvey's phone.
"Translation: Its when the horses are given a “milkshake” of different drugs before a race. It can kill fatigue and improve their endurance."
all heads look down to the phone, then at donna's desk. donna's already looking their way, of course, and she swallows under their field of vision. she shrugs.
"What? I can't.. watch tv?"
she abruptly puts the phone down, turning her chair around to type on her computer. jessica clears her throat.
"Tom is an old friend. He's genuine."
harvey interrupts. "You need me to make it go away.”
“No. This could tarnish his entire reputation… his life’s work. I need you to kill this thing in its tracks. Get it done.”
with that, jessica turns & exists the office. harvey sighs, skimming over the case file jessica dropped on his desk. he looks at mike.
“Find the daughter. Find out everything — previous arrests, divorces, a stolen tangerine from publix- I wanna know about it.”
mike nods, offering a-
“Yes, captain,”
(which makes harvey give him an exasperated look) before he retreats back to his cubicle, moving to start his manhunt. donna winks as he passes her desk.
꧁——————————————————꧂
“No, he doesn’t.”
you can sense the presence of the associate approaching behind you. you quickly thank the man working the stand as he hands you your pretzel, and you turn to face harvey’s right-hand. mike ross.
“I- You don’t even know what I was about to say.”
“Yes, I do.”
he’s cute. pretty blue eyes, a photographic memory, and a boyish charm that you can’t say you’re immune to.
“You were about to ask if he’s had any previous arrests. No, never.”
mike shakes his head. “Sorcery. Speeding tickets?”
you turn to look at him with an exasperated look. “No, officer.” he smiles.
“How did you know? That I’d ask.”
you shrug. “Ancient blood magic.”
a few moments of silence pass, and he’s silently moving his head in tune with his thoughts — like he actually believes you. you decide on mercy.
“It’s the first question lawyers always ask.”
“Ah. Been through this before?”
you shrug.
“Do you always stalk your clients?”
he doesn’t miss a beat. “Only the pretty ones- a hobby of mine.”
you hum, breaking off a piece of your pretzel and handing it to him. he sighs, leaning back.
“Oh you sweet, sweet angel.”
you both continue your walk to pearson/hardman, wanting to get there early to prep for the deposition today. mike breaks the silence once he’s done chewing.
“Do you always feed your lawyers?”
“Only the cute ones,” you break off another piece, handing it to him. “Its a hobby of mine.”
꧁——————————————————꧂
the elevator rings, signifying the end to your journey. mike is in disbelief as you step out of the elevator — mind trying to wrap around your last statement.
“What- are you serious?”
“As a heart attack.”
mike moves to catch up with you. “Okay, multimillion-dollar horse racing company, and you just.. have no security cameras? Zero?”
you turn to face him, giving him a defiant look that makes his heart flutter.
“I don’t see any cameras around here.”
as you approach the glass-doored conference room, mike opens the door for you.
“Touché.”
you shoot him a look across your shoulder before you move to greet your father, already waiting. mike pauses outside, staring, as you hug your father, no doubt offering some sort of reassurance.
“No.”
mikes head snaps toward the voice, harvey’s un-foreseen presence making him jump a little. mike looks around a bit.
“I.. didn’t even-“
harvey points a finger at mike, then at you, then slowly wags it back and forth for dramatics. mike sighs, looking around and putting his hands in his pockets, waiting for his scolding to be done.
“Harvey-“
“Uh uh.”
“Harvey.”
harvey continues his finger wag. “Micheal.”
“Harvey.”
harvey walks backwards towards the door, opening it with his free hand. “Don’t.. do it.”
mike rolls his eyes, following harvey into the room.
okay. don’t get with the funniest, most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen. got it. easy.
easy. right?
the look you give him as he sits down proves him otherwise.
#suits usa#suits tv#suits#mike ross#mike ross x reader#mike ross x you#please this is so ass it’s not even funny#i really truly hate this#BUT#i feel so bad for making u wait so long anon 😭😭#i’ll post a proper fic of this in a few days 😈😈#guys what if we all just collectively ignored this#i feel like i can’t write good dialogue for mike or harvey shoot me#i literally hate it here#ALRIGHT#TIME TO HIT POST AND REGRET IT FOR THE NEXT WEEK#dippys asks
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Going on vacation every year is a lot... Definitely not middle class, most people can only dream of that, and even if they do go on vacation, it's usually a staycation. You have to be from a really wealthy family to be able to travel to expensive places like Italy and Greece every year.
#the fact u namedropped greece out of all places as this pinnacle of expensive bourgeoisie tourism is so so funny.#anon#asks
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