#angst with no comfort

[morikosa]

REMORSE

SUMMARY: He doesn't realize how valuable you are until he loses you.

Things could have been different. If he had stayed home, you would still be alive. You would still be alive…

''My love… p-please don’t go''

Gojo froze in his tracks, feeling your delicate arms wrap around his waist from behind. Despite himself, a small flicker of surprise coursed through him, momentarily halting his steps towards the door. Your trembling voice reached his ears, filled with desperation and a plea for him to stay.

"I-I will prepare a dinner for you, my love… p-please don’t go,” you whispered, your lips pressing softly against his back in a tender kiss.

For a brief moment, the gentle touch and your plea tugged at a minuscule fragment of buried empathy within him. However, he quickly squashed that flicker of compassion.

He twisted his body to face you, his expression turning cold and unyielding once again under his blindfold. He roughly pushed your arms away from his waist, forcing you to release her grip on him. The action was swift and unforgiving.

“Your feeble attempts to keep me won’t work, y/n.” he spat, his voice laced with cruel indifference. “I have no use for your pitiful displays of affection. I am leaving.”

He turned away from you, resolute in his decision. He regretted his words at the moment he saw the pain and sadness in your eyes. But he couldn’t show it, he couldn’t show any sign of weakness.

After all, he was the strongest

With a last glance, he walked towards the door and left you. As he crossed the threshold, his heart remained hardened, untouched by the anguish he left behind. 

...

He was a terrible husband. He didn’t pay any attention to you. But he wanted to change that, so he bought you a bouquet to make it up to you, and today he was going to take you out to dinner. He was going to fix everything, you were going to be happy together.

“My sweet wifey~, I thought we could have dinner today, husband and wife–”

Upon entering the house, Gojo was met with an eerie silence that sent a chill down his spine. The door wide open, the lights on – everything seemed off. As he stepped further inside, his heart raced, confusion clouding his thoughts. The scent of carnage enveloped him, the heavy air thick with tension.

Then he found you.

Lying lifeless on the floor, your limbs twitching slightly as the waning moments of your life escaped from you. Blood pooled beneath you, the crimson liquid staining the once pristine floors with its haunting presence. A profound sorrow washed over him, accompanied by a wave of guilt – a bitter taste in his mouth.

The flowers he had intended to apologize with dropped from his grasp, the vibrant colors now tainted by the horrifying scene unfolding before his eyes. He watched in horror as you struggled for your last breaths, your fragile body betrayed by the curse that sought to end her life.

The irreversibility of the situation dawned on him at that moment - her fate was already sealed, your time running thin. Tears welled up in his eyes as realizations flooded his mind; regrets of his callous behavior, anger, and neglect came racing back and consumed his conscience.

If only he had stayed... if only he had paid attention.

Gojo fell to his knees beside you, reaching out tentatively to steady her limp form. “Y/N. Stay with me,” he pleaded, a foreign word in his vocabulary. “Please, don’t go.” His tears fell in torrents, landing beside hers on the muddied ground.

“Who. Who did this to you-”

His hands shook as he cradled you close, your warm breath steadily fading in his embrace. The pain of losing you was like a dagger piercing his heart, a relentless torture he could never escape.

What was the point? What was the point of being the strongest if he couldn’t even protect his wife?

At present

Gojo stands before your grave, a solemn figure with his head bowed low. The air holds a heavy silence, broken only by the soft rustle of leaves as a gentle breeze caresses the surrounding trees. The weight of his loss rests heavily upon his shoulders, his heart burdened with a mix of grief and regret.

“Hey, it’s me again,” he murmurs, his voice choked with emotion as he addresses the earth beneath him. “I don’t know if you can hear me, but I wanted to let you know… I’m doing my best, even though it feels impossible without you here.”

His fingers trace the engraved letters of your name on the tombstone, his touch both reverent and pained. Memories of your time together flood his mind, each a bittersweet reminder of what he had lost. The weight of his remorse for not cherishing those moments to their fullest becomes evident in how his shoulders slump and his breath hitches.

“I miss you, more than words can express,” he admits, his voice breaking with raw vulnerability. “I wish I had realized sooner what you truly meant to me. I wish I had been a better husband and person for you… worthy of the love you had for me.”

His grip tightens on the flowers he brought, his knuckles turning white. He places them gently upon your grave, his gaze lingering upon the fading petals.

Tears glisten in his mismatched eyes, his voice barely more than a whisper now. “I love you, and I always will. I’m sorry I realized this so late. Wherever you are, I hope you’ve found peace. And just know… you’ll forever have a place in my heart.”

With a final, lingering look at your tombstone, he puts the bouquet on your tombstone and turns away.

He will live a lifetime with the pain of ruining the perfect future he could have had with you.

[kinzhae]

"Left Behind."

Gojo x Reader, angst with no comfort, reader and gojo drifts away as they enter jujutsu high, being left behind, reader sacrificing her life in order to keep gojo safe.

The first time Satoru left you behind, you brushed it off.

“Gojo Satoru is going to change the world,” you told yourself, smiling as you watched him walk off with Suguru Geto and Shoko Ieiri, his laughter echoing down the hall. His carefree attitude was infectious, and while you were happy for him, it hurt to know that you weren’t part of that laughter anymore.

It hadn’t always been this way. You and Satoru were inseparable once, bound by childhood promises and shared dreams. Back then, the world wasn’t complicated, and neither was he. The cocky smile he wore now was once reserved just for you.

But Jujutsu High changed everything.

---

You noticed the shift slowly. It started with missed conversations—whispers in the hallway you weren’t invited into, a glance over your shoulder to see him too far behind to call out to. Satoru didn’t mean to push you away. You knew that. But as his new friendships deepened, it became clear that your bond wasn’t the unbreakable connection you once thought it was.

Suguru was kind, brilliant, and calm—the perfect foil to Satoru’s chaotic energy. Shoko had a quiet wit that matched his sharp tongue. Together, the three of them felt untouchable, like the rest of the world could only stand by and watch as they carved their own path.

You were no longer part of that world. You tried to let go, you really did.

Even as the ache settled in your chest, you told yourself it was enough to simply watch him thrive. If Satoru was happy, wasn’t that all that mattered? You repeated those words like a mantra, trying to ignore the sting when he barely noticed you anymore.

It wasn’t his fault.

It wasn’t anyone’s fault.

But the cracks in your heart didn’t care for reason.

One day, everything changed. You were heading back to the dorms after a long day of training when you overheard the conversation.

Two voices in the shadows.

One familiar, one chillingly foreign.

“Gojo Satoru. The Six Eyes... He’s too dangerous to keep alive,” hissed the first voice—a higher-up whose name you didn’t dare utter. “The balance he disrupts, the power he wields... If he continues unchecked, no one will be able to control him.”

“And what do you propose?” growled the second voice, raspy and cold. It wasn’t human.

You froze, your blood running cold as you peeked around the corner.

“I want him gone. Do it cleanly. I’ll ensure you have what you need—resources, bodies, whatever it takes. Just make it happen.”

The curse smiled, sharp teeth glinting in the dim light. “Consider it done.”

Your world tilted.

They were going to kill him.

Satoru.

The boy who laughed too loudly, who stood by you even when the world felt too heavy, who once promised you that you’d always be by his side.

You had already been left behind. But you wouldn’t lose him. Not like this.

That night, you sought out the curse.

Its presence was suffocating, the weight of its aura pressing down on you as it materialized in front of you.

“And what do you want, little sorcerer?” it sneered.

“My life,” you said, your voice steady despite the terror clawing at your throat. “Take my life, my powers—anything. Just leave Satoru alone.”

The curse’s laughter echoed around you, harsh and mocking. “Anything, you say? Bold. And what makes you think I’ll honor such a deal?”

“Because if you don’t,” you said, lifting your chin, “I’ll make sure you regret it.”

A lie, of course. You were no match for it. But the curse seemed amused enough to agree.

“Very well. Your life for his. But once the deal is struck, there’s no turning back.”

“I know.”

As the curse’s claws reached out, you closed your eyes, picturing Satoru’s smile one last time.

You disappeared that night.

No one saw you leave. No one even knew why. You left behind nothing but questions and an empty dorm room, your name slipping further from their lips as the days turned into weeks, then months.

Satoru didn’t notice at first. You hadn’t been close lately, after all. But as time passed, he started to feel the absence.

It was subtle at first—a glance around the training field, expecting to see you standing at the edge, watching with a small smile. Then came the ache, the nagging sense that something was missing. He asked Shoko, then Suguru. Neither had seen you.

When he went to your room, it was stripped bare, as if you had never existed.

Satoru wasn’t the sentimental type, but the emptiness you left behind gnawed at him. He tried to brush it off—he was Gojo Satoru, after all. He didn’t dwell on things. He didn’t need to.

But late at night, when the silence grew too loud, he found himself thinking of you. Of your smile. Of the way you used to scold him when he pushed himself too hard. Of the way you had always been there, steady and unshakable, even when the rest of the world felt like it was slipping out of control.

He searched. Of course he searched.

But you were gone.

---

Satoru never stopped looking. Not really. Even years later, long after the grief had settled into something dull and hollow, he still found himself scanning crowds, hoping to catch a glimpse of you.

He told himself it was guilt—guilt for letting you slip away, for not noticing how far apart you had grown. But deep down, he knew it was more than that.

He had left you behind.

And he would never forgive himself for it.

[yilingpatriarchscvnt]

They were too late to get you back.

Warnings: mention of death, arguments, angst with no happy ending, neglected reader, jealousy.

Diluc x reader, Alhaitham x reader

"Never got the chance to apologize.."

DİLUC

Diluc and you were not the type of people who would fight often, been a relationship with him almost 4 years. Sure, everything is going well.

Well... it was going well. For the past 1 year everything changed for you and him. He barely came home, interact with you, ignoring you most of the time... and kept arguing, fighting over small things.

You never opened your mouth or fight back, you loved diluc so much that it was starting to hurt. Your shared room started to feel cold, no more morning kisses or hugs before diluc went to work, cold breakfasts and dinner all by yourself. Even if he did join the diner he would be quiet all the time, not even looking at you.

You did kept your mouth shut, holding for a hope... a hope for your future with him. Until you heard the conversation with Jean. The last knife that would break you.

"She's so useless, I cant keep up with her annoying presence all the time. All she do is stay at home and distract me from work... she keeps finding noneless things to argue with me. I just want to break the ties with her already, being with her is so tiring."

"Am I... that bad?" Who knew your dear lover was thinking of you like this for the past 1 year. All you wanted was too be like the past relationship you both had. Warm bed, morning kisses, happy breakfast and dates. Covering your mouth trying not to make any sound you left there sobbing quietly.

You did everything, I mean really everything. That all arguing was really nothing for him? You just asked for him to stay by yourside for more. You were slowly draining from inside, you had no one but diluc. Only his presence was keeping you sane but this cold mansion was making you crazy.

You returned back to the mansion, you had enough. Talking with him would go nowhere after all. You wanted his attention, you wanted him to see your worth. Going to the storage room picking up the sword once you held before moving in with your so called lover. Taking a mission from katheryne, you walked to the lawachurls camp.

You were going to show him that you are still worth for something, that you could help him with everything if he asked for it. Even if it meant death. Standing in front of the big creature holding your sword tightly you ran towards to it.

..Oh how wrong you were, thinking you could defeat that monster. Laying on a pool of blood coming from your head. Suddenly feeling peacefull for the first time after 1 year of suffering from neglect. Looking at the shining stars above you. Your head ringing from aches, sword a meter away. Faint screaming noises from back. You couldn't bother to look that way.

"Please..." a faint voice big hands caressing your cheek, weird it wasnt raining but you could feel wetness on your cheeks. Turning your eyes to the voice. Hands wiping away your blood.

"Diluc.." your throat dry, coughing the blood. Your beloved, your future. How could you hate him when he was the only one left in your life? İs this really how you were going to die? As a pathetic advanturer? Few tears sliding from your face as your blurry vision tried to capture every beauty on his face.

"Jean is coming here so... please... please dont leave me now..I wont neglect you anymore...I will beg on my knees once you recover... so dont leave me here all alone.." Ah... was he also holding a hope on his hands too? A future would be great with him. Your eyelids feeling heavy, heart beating slowly as the seconds passing, his voice becoming more and more faint.

"Sleep...Can I sleep in your arms?" Your head falling to his chest, inhaling the scent for the last time you missed for so long. Diluc holding your cold body close to him, screaming and crying cursing to the celestia as you drift away from him.

Alhaitham

Alhaitham was no bad guy, I mean if it is you, he actually is willing to do anything for you. He is sure workaholic, but you guys were making sure spending time.

You met him in akademiya when you guys were like 18-19. İt wasnt a love in first sight infact you hated him because he was a cocky man. He barely cared for any situtations, always one step ahead of you, teasing you even if other cant really understand his way of teasing. But overall because of kaveh you guys did get along sometimes.

Suprisingly he was the one who confessed with a valentines card, it was cute since he was shy about it and now its been 7 years.

Alhaitham is good at fighting so sometimes he takes dangerous missions other than being scribe and that worries you a little. You were just a researcher in akademiya so you cant always be with him. First time meeting with The Traveler your mind was at ease since they were with Alhaitham and helped him with secret missions in desert.

From 7 years to this day he is also not the type of person who really shows affection towards to someone but you, it made you feel speacial. But after all that archon saving missions he invites traveler to dinner, hanging out with her more and more. You told yourself that you were not jealous and its normal to hang out with people they like.

This became so often that you were feeling so neglected, you couldnt even talked about this with alhaitham since you felt like he wouldnt care about it.

You were in your room with kaveh, he was trying to finish his desings as you were staring at the ceiling. "Saw alhaitham with a woman today while coming here." Kaveh broke the silence. "Do you know her?" He turned to you.

"You mean the traveler?" You asked tilting your head. "Uhm no? Traveler left to fontaine almost 1 week ago..." he was cold sweating, your eyes widened from shock. Then who he was meeting up with for 1 week?

"Kaveh... tell me your joking?" You laughed. İt was probably one of the jokes he was making right? But he remained silent looking down. No you wouldnt believe it until you see it with your own eyes. "Y/N wait-"

You stormed off to the Sumeru City streets heart beating like crazy. You stopped 20 meter away from alhaitham, hiding in the corner. You saw him... his betrayal as he caressed another womans cheek. She was beautiful, long silky hair and shining eyes, thin and elegance body. Your eyes watering slowly as you watched him lean for a kiss.

You ran from there. As fast as you can, till your lungs gave up. Entering your shared home to pack things up, you looked at youself on the mirror. Hair that looked horrible, sleepy eyes, body that looked like a frog in your eyes. But her... she was beautiful unlike you. You cried for the first time after years, wiping your tears as you packed your things. Leaving your room with no trace of you.

Kaveh on the other hand, explaining alhaitham that you saw everything. Panic rising in him he ran to the shared house. Walking inside slowly, trying to hear if there were any noise. "Y/N? I.. I came home?" He shouted. Feeling weird like the house got colder and quiet. His heart still beating like crazy he rushed to your room only to be faced with a tidy bed, empty warddrobe and empty studying desk.

This was a cruel joke on him right? You were joking, pranking him to make him regret for not telling you sooner it was for a mission right? His hand covering his face as he falls on his knees calling out your name a few times before breaking down.

Looking around trying to find anything that belonged to you, walking inside the house he spotted a letter.

My beloved lover,

I had to leave our home because my heart was hurting too much. Sometimes, I saw things that made me scared—little moments that maybe meant nothing but felt big and heavy to me. I've always struggled with feeling good enough, and these fears made me feel even smaller.

Leaving wasn’t about anger; it was about being so overwhelmed by sadness that staying felt impossible. I never wanted to run away, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that maybe I wasn’t what you needed.

I'm really sorry for any pain my leaving has caused. I hope one day we can understand each other better, but for now, I need some space to work through these feelings.

Take care,

[Your Name]

That was it, you left without giving a hint where you went. Guilt eating alhaitham up. For him you were perfect, you were everything he needed. Even your silence made him happy and peacefull. He was never good at showing his emotions and expressions but when you were with him he felt like he didnt need to force himself. You understood everything about him.

He lay down on your bed, a faint scent inhaling as he slightly squezzing the letter in his hand. Murmuring your name, begging to the teyvat to bring you back to him.

[iomoru]

Good day, I, too have my own Kinich angst request for ya. Could you do one where after Reader dies protecting Kinich, he finds out they'd secretly forged a contract of their own with Ajaw that if they were to lose their life in the process of actively saving Kinich's (and thereby delaying Ajaw from getting his vessel; he'd probably treat the new deal as Reader's "punishment" for doing so and thus agree to it), he takes over THEIR body instead?

The Price of Devotion

A/n: I genuinely love this idea Saturn anon! ♡´･ᴗ･`♡

Genre: Canon Verse, Angst w/ no happy ending, Reader Dies, Gn! Reader, Second Person, Proofread

Summary: After sacrificing your life to protect Kinich, your secret deal with Ajaw comes to light—a contract that, upon your death, would grant Ajaw control over your body instead of Kinich's. As Kinich holds your lifeless form, the cruel reality sets in when Ajaw rises in your place, leaving Kinich devastated by the cost of your devotion.

part. 1, part. 2

The weight of your body fell against Kinich's, your breath shallow as you struggled to stay conscious. Blood seeped through your hands where you pressed against your wound, but the pain paled in comparison to the agony in Kinich’s eyes as he held you close. He had been too late—too slow to stop the blade meant for him from finding its way to you instead.

"Why did you do that?" Kinich’s voice trembled, his golden eyes wide with disbelief. "You didn’t have to…I could have—"

"No," you whispered, your voice weak but resolute. "I…couldn’t lose you."

His arms tightened around you, his grip desperate as if holding you closer could stop the inevitable. But the warmth in your body was fading, and you could feel the darkness creeping in. There was no time left.

"I’m not worth this…" Kinich's voice cracked. He had spent so long trying to protect you, to shield you from the weight of the burden he carried as Ajaw’s chosen vessel. And now, you had given up everything for him.

You could barely focus, your senses slipping away, but you could still see the pain written all over his face. You reached up with trembling fingers to brush the side of his cheek, offering a faint, bittersweet smile. He deserved the truth, though you had sworn to keep it secret until this very moment.

"I made…a deal," you murmured, your breath growing fainter with each word.

Kinich's gaze darkened with confusion. "A deal?"

You nodded, your strength waning. "With Ajaw…if I died…protecting you… he’d take my body instead. Not yours."

His eyes widened, horror and disbelief colliding in his expression. "You what? You can't—"

"It was the only way Kinich," you breathed, your voice faltering. "I couldn’t let him take you."

Kinich shook his head furiously, panic overtaking him. "No, no…this can’t happen. I should be the one to pay the price. Not you."

Your heart ached at the desperation in his voice, but it was too late. The terms had already been set. You had given yourself over, knowing the consequences. You had accepted that Ajaw would use you as his vessel, that your body would no longer be your own. But it was a price you had been willing to pay…for Kinich’s sake.

"I’m sorry," you whispered, tears pooling in the corners of your eyes. "I just…I couldn’t bear to lose you."

Kinich's grip tightened, his voice breaking as he pleaded, "There has to be another way. There must be something we can do—"

But even as he spoke, you felt it—Ajaw’s presence creeping into the edges of your awareness. The god had been waiting for this moment, for you to fall. You had defied him, delayed him from claiming his vessel, but now he would have you instead.

Kinich’s gaze flickered in panic as he felt the shift too, sensing the change in your energy. He clutched you closer, shaking his head as if trying to deny the inevitable. "Please, don’t leave me…"

Tears slipped down your cheeks as you whispered, "I’ll always…love you."

And with those words, the light in your eyes dimmed, and you slipped away into the void.

Kinich’s scream shattered the silence of the battlefield.

But the horror wasn’t over. Your body, once lifeless in his arms, began to stir. Slowly, unnaturally, your fingers twitched, your chest rising and falling with a breath that wasn’t your own.

Kinich’s blood ran cold as he pulled back, watching in dread as your eyes snapped open—no longer filled with the warmth and love he had known, but with the cold, malevolent gaze of Ajaw.

A slow, wicked smile spread across your—no, Ajaw’s—lips.

“Thank you for your sacrifice,” Ajaw’s voice echoed from your mouth, mocking and cruel. “I must say, I couldn’t have asked for a better vessel.”

Kinich’s heart shattered as he stared at the hollow shell of the person he loved.

This wasn’t you anymore. This was the price of your devotion—the cost of saving him. And now, as Ajaw gazed at him with your eyes, Kinich realized the bitter truth:

You were gone. Forever.

A/n: I seriously love angst with no happy ending

© ²⁰²⁴ ɪᴏᴍᴏʀᴜ ✰ do not repost, translate, plagiarize, use to train ai, or share my work on other social media platforms.

[cupidsblonde]

so do i look like him?

after katsuki’s death, the only thing your parents can see in you is him

when you used to imagine giving a speech about your younger brother, you have imagined it everywhere but here.

maybe a wedding

at an award show  

anywhere but here.

“i remember when katsuki first got his quirk, we all knew he was destined for greatness… but he was ripped away from us to soon.” you say lip quivering.

“he will never be able to live out his dream. or live out the life that had so many great things ahead of him. ripped from the arms of his loved ones, from his greatness, from his determination.” voice breaking, tears falling down your face.

“tomura shigaraki, i promise that if i ever find you, you will be ripped from the hearts of the people motivated by you, just as you did my brother” you say staring straight into the broadcasting camera, which was showing your brothers funeral all across the world.

since he was a nation wide hero. but he never got to be the hero he wanted to be, rich, famous, doing what he loved. 

for he was famous. this just wasn’t how anyone imaged it.

 was this all he was going to be to the world? a dead kid, who had a dream of being a hero and died on his way there in a war he had no place fighting in? 

is that kid the only thing your parents will ever be able to see in you?

being the eldest was great, until katsuki was gone. 

incident one

 you where all sitting around the dinning table. katsuki’s spot next to your empty. nothing but his lingering smell of caramel, which was fading, and quickly. it was quite. you just wanted to eat, and go to sleep. 

you pick up your fork and go to put the food into your mouth, clamping your mouth around the fork and unbeknownst to you, the scratching food. 

you groan, grimace and catch your parents eyes. they’re both staring at you. like you did something wrong. you can see the tears welling in their eyes. your mom slams her fork down and gets up from the table 

“excuse me” she says in a hushed tone. you didn’t know what happened. you looked to your dad for an answer. 

“you just looked a lot like him right then” you dad almost whispers to you.

incident two

you missed katsuki a lot.

his grunts

his anger

his determination 

his want 

his excellency.

you and everyone in your house avoided his room like the plague. scared that if it was changed even a little bit, something would happen. 

but you just couldn’t take not even smelling his scent around the house anymore. you went into his room one day. 

16 years of coming into his room, annoying him, crying to him, watching movies with him. had come to end. you sat on the floor, sat in his bed, sat at his desk and you made your way to his closet. that’s where it smelt the most of him. aside from his bed, but even that was fading.

all you wanted to do was cry. there was no way he was coming back, you know that. right? 

you continue to go into his spaces. just hoping your going to find your younger brother there. watch him study maybe, even hope you would be able to hear him yell at you to “get the f out of my room”. 

but you would never get to have that’s again. 

this time it was your dad. 

you had said something that you picked up from katsuki and your dad froze where he stood. 

you could tell he had been cracking his shell he made when katsuki died. push everything down to hold the family together. so he needed to get away. he stopped what he was doing and went to he and your mothers room. 

“you just looked a lot like him, with that look on your face, saying that.” your mother quivered out to you. sobbing and choking at the end of her sentence.

incident three

you had been falling back into a place that katsuki an you both worked so hard to get you out of mentally. 

you where drinking again

back on drugs

it started slow. just how it always did. 

you had been clean for nearly 2 years. you obviously didn’t need your younger brother to keep you a normal ass person, who wasn’t drinking all the time, sleeping all the time, back on drugs.

bakugo katsuki, your younger brother, your best friend. was one of the only things that kept you on the earth. 

but now, it was your parents. not because you where happy all the time with them as you where with katsuki. 

but having to bury both of their children? you couldn’t do that to them. 

so you began getting sober again. the drugs stopped and the drinking stopped, you had been reminded that katsuki helped you out of that dark, dark place and if he saw you just fall right back into it as soon as he’s gone, he would be disappointed.

it was hard, because it wand ike he was gone on a trip. he was gone, for good.

this time, it was both of them. both of your parents. 

you grabbed any random hoodie one day, not even realizing it was your brothers. you came down the stairs and your parents where right in the view of the stairs, and stopped when you came down. 

you then realized. 

you wouldnt ever be your own person now. atleast not to your parents. 

you understood, their child was gone. and you reminded them of him. and that’s … hard.

not only for them but also for yourself.

this is the first time you started to catch on 

“do i look like him?” 

both of your parents nodded quickly, tears filling their eyes and they both walked away very quickly. 

of course you went to go change.

but that’s when you realized, 

his scent wasn’t on the hoodie anymore 

the more that you thought about it. his scent wasn’t anywhere around the house anymore, aside for his room, which was fading. 

incident four

you where going through an old photo album, you all missed katsuki in with all of your hearts. 

there where a bunch of pictures of katsuki but it started getting easier to look at them. easier to, accept.

but there was this one problem, this one picture. that had your mother sobbing, your dad with tears streaming down your face and you, your face plastered with an a thousand yard stare. your mouth fell open, you wanted to say something. 

anything, but you couldn’t. it felt like your vocal cords had been ripped out, your throat was burning. your eyes where being filled with tears. you closed the picture book slowly. 

you don’t remember much after that.

 all you feel right now is the pain in the balls of your feet from the heels your wearing, continusally having to pull your to short and to tight dress down and the feeling of your back side grinding up against a man that you meet at the bar merely a half hour ago.

“wanna get out of here ma?” the man who you didn’t even know who’s name.

next morning

you woke up next to this man, who you still didn’t know the name of. 

these type of nights continued on for weeks. 

you didn’t see your parents much, you where staying with your friends more and more and they are worried about you. they are always supportive, they understand what your going through. but they are worried.

and they had every reason to. especially tonight. 

when you didn’t come home, after you sobbed in mina’s arms are the first time. saying you wished it was you who was gone and not your brother. she was first your brothers friend, but she ended up being yours as well. 

you missed him, so so much. and you didn’t know how to handle it.

you had taken care of him for his whole life. being the eldest was hard. it was always hard. it was so much harder when the one thing keeping you going was now gone. 

you could see it in your parents eyes. the only thing in their eyes was sadness. so the only you could ask yourself now was 

“do i look like him?”

[serenetoru]

JJK SMAU | ITS YOUR FAULT.

in which you cheated on them, really why did you do it? angst with no comfort♡

they cheated on you

- Gojo Satoru, Geto Suguru, Kamo Choso, Fushiguro Toji, Ryomen Sukuna -

[ladybyakuya]

| SILVER SOUL + RAFAYEL. 

+cw. —f!reader, reincarnation au + modern au + soulmate au, angst, yearning, one-sided pining, mature content. hints if love triangle if you squint | +wc. — 1k | +syn.— with that money,power and status your client had you thought this would be your breakthrough after working as bodyguard for a while now but it tore your heart apart instead.

+notes. — i’ll say this again. bodyguard job is no joke. insert that meme of [ “do a bodyguard mission.”they said, “it would be fun.” they said.] | redirect to blog navigation. | thanks to @purpleqilinwrites & @hayatoseyepatch for beta reading this piece.

"I love you," Rafayel blurted out as he stared at the painting, part of him wanted to take it back, but the other half knew it did not matter since you must be sleeping somewhere here in this giant Mo Art Studio, in his home while he is drinking wine from the bottle he excavated from the wine cellar. Even though you should be awake and be by his side, you are not. He is all alone in his studio in the dead of night. His face contorts as he takes a few gulps from the bottle and keeps it on the nearby table. He hates it. He likes the taste. He would probably feel chipper and trippy by now but something happened this morning, something he did not expect, and all of this, this unfathomable sealike sadness stemmed from you. He is the God of the Sea, you can’t hurt him yet you did. Even the moon which was full has now turned into a slice, hiding behind the clouds. Even the moon is afraid of him. He scoffs at such sentiment. 

“Ser Rafayel. . . what’re you—

“Shhhhh!” He shushes you with his index finger over his lips. The sound almost comes as sharp as a whistle. His eyes linger on you, fluorescent it seems under the pale moonlight coming through the windows. He is standing in front of a painting almost five feet apart from you as you stand at the entrance of the studio. There are so many questions you want to ask him. What happened when you fainted? What happened to the gigantic sea creature? Why can’t you remember anything? — but all you could ask was, “Are you still mad at me?” voice as feeble as broken shells on the shore. It took you almost an hour to find him since you could not go back to sleep after what happened this morning. So, you’re not going back until you say your thing. Fuck work. Fuck professionalism. You want answers.

Rafayel turns his head in a flash. Mad at you? How could he ever? He is just . . . hurt. Why you ask? He turns his head back to the painting. He blames himself for the way you act now but he can not admit that to himself. Yeah! He is a coward. 

He did not expect you to be so cold after he saved your life. He hired you as your bodyguard for a reason, diluted the boundary of professionalism for a reason yet you have the audacity to tell him off? You might not remember your past life with him but he does and it is so vivid that it hurts to look at the same face that has totally such hostile feelings towards him. You do not know how many human lives it took to meet you again. Ah! This wretched curse. Humans are such vile creatures and it feels like a silver dagger in soul to have you as human in this life while he is a lemurian. If only he knew the way to make you remember . . . why can’t he just add some memories just like he wiped yours when he saved you from the Deluge Wyrmlord?

“Why are you here? Shouldn’t you be asleep?” you swallow as he questions back realizing how dry your throat has become. It seems that he is still mad.

“As should you be too.” He looks at you, eyes red like running lava ready to swallow lives on earth  with a visible crease amongst his eyebrows. “Ser Rafayel.” you add.

Rafayel walks towards the sitting stool that he generally uses while painting but he tumbles in his way and you instantly run at light speed to hold him. “I’m fine. am fine.” He assures raising his hand in the air blocking your way to come to him for any aid he requires now. 

“Can I ask you something?”

“Anything Ser.”

“Am I that appalling to you? He asked his heart aching since it still beats. The question hits you like a stone on a metal door. You do not. You clearly do not. It is just that . . . at that moment you weren’t thinking straight. You thought he did something to you. why do you think so little of me that you thought I did something to you while you were unconscious?"  

Your lips part for a second trying to form an answer that could ease his soul, soothe his mind. The answer is nothing but silence frustrates him to the point that he leaves his seat and stands up. You scoot a little closer fearing he would tumble again. Even though you emptied the wine cellar he managed to find one bottle. He must have a secret place or something. The state he is in, you think, Rafayel is going to forget all these what is happening right now. So, gathering all the courage you had left in your body standing as close as possible to him so that you can catch him if he falls. "You don't have any idea what you're doing to me." The amount of slur in his voice and the way his feet are wobbly he is gonna fall any second. . .and as you expected he falls like a withering petal in your arms. With utmost ease, you jock down on the floor. There is still a little bit of consciousness in his body but not enough to reject your help as he did just a while ago. 

He lulls into slumber with his head lying on your lap as he mumbles being under the influence of alcohol. "I'm in love with you," He snuggles more into your lap like a cat; so much for being afraid of them. "I'm in love with you and it sucks because I know you'll never love me back. Not in this life." As you hear his even breathing followed by slow purrs. You poke his cheek a little. He is asleep. Ah! Perfect timing.

[swarvey]

when you've moved on | elliott x gn!reader | part two

summary -> he slowly lost interest in you after you got married. now he watches you fall back in love with someone else. warnings -> very slight mention of nsfw, implied age gap, mainly just angst! wc -> 1106

a/n: i swear i keep trying to write for the bachelorettes but then get inspired with an idea for the bachelors :') anyways have this, decided to do elliott since he's "so much older and wiser" iykyk.

this was inspired by the dialogue you get when your hearts with your sdv spouse gets low, except i flipped the tables :) lmk if you guys want to see this as a series!!

part one -> the way i loved you (sebastian)

tolerate it -> "what would you do if i break free and leave us in ruins?"

elliott's pen hovers over the page in front of him, unmoving for the past ten minutes now. his grip tightens, knuckles white in frustration as he finally releases it, falling back in his chair with his eyes closed as it clatters onto his table.

his writer's block has never been worse, and it's because all he can think of is you.

more so, his loss of you.

no matter how many times he replays the scenario in his head, he can't make sense of how he lost you. he still remembers his wedding day, how he couldn't help but tear up at the sight of you approaching him down the aisle.

"you said you wouldn't cry," you'd teased him.

"i said i would try, my dear," he responded, touching your cheek gently, "but how can i not? your beauty is otherworldly today."

he remembers his vows, his promise to always be by your side. he remembers kissing you like his life depended on it. he remembers going home with you that night, in disbelief that he could finally call you his as he pulled his hair into a bun, mermaid's pendant hitting his bare chest as he dragged you to the bedroom.

"i love you, y/n," he'd said after, both of you panting in exhaustion and satisfaction beside each other. "more than anything else in this universe. i wouldn't trade you for a hundred iridium bars."

you'd laughed, turning your head to look at him with shining eyes and pink cheeks. "really? how about a thousand?"

"nor a thousand."

"ten thousand?"

"not even ten thousand bars, no."

". . . how about a hundred thousand?"

"no, not even a hundred thousand bars!" he'd turned to you then, wide-eyed and holding back a grin at the sight of your scheming gaze. "my love, let's be reasonable—"

"what about a million bars?"

"wha . . . a million bars of pure iridium . . . ? dear, don't make me do this . . ."

"a-ha!" you'd said, sitting up in bed suddenly. "so you would!"

"i never said such a thing!"

at the sight of his pout, you had sprawled yourself on top of him, planting a kiss on his nose as he looked down at you with a smile.

"i love you, too, el."

elliott sighs, his head falling forward into his hand. one part of him wishes to hear you utter those words again; the other prays he'll one day forget you ever said them.

the first few seasons after the wedding had been dreamlike — elliott had never felt so full of life before. it was like being with you had opened his eyes to how colorful and bright the world could be. sometimes he would wake up before you and admire your sleeping figure, a soft smile appearing on his lips every time he caught a glimpse of your necklace.

he doesn't remember when the spark began to fade, though.

no, he only recalls the days he began to leave the farm early in the morning to spend time alone in his old cabin on the beach, coming back only for dinner. the two of you would eat quietly, sitting at opposite ends of the table. he would ask and answer questions shortly, mainly focusing on the dull, uninspiring feeling he seemed to get every time he was in your shared house.

he never noticed the sad look filling your eyes, begging him to pay attention to you, to show you the love he once had for you. he paid no mind to how your face lit up every time he came home, only to deflate as he walked past you. he never even thought about how your conversations with him had turned one-sided, as he would spill his troubles to you without even giving you a chance to share yours.

not until it was too late, that is.

". . . do you still love me?"

it was a question he never thought he would hear from you, and yet he'd unknowingly driven you to that point. elliott had never heard silence so loud until then, realizing that, for some reason, he couldn't answer your question.

"answer me, elliott," you'd said, voice wavering as he uneasily met your eyes. "i need to know this. i feel like you've been treating me like a kid lately — when i talk to you, i can barely get a word out without you lecturing me. you're barely home to even do that anymore."

he scoffed. "please, y/n, be reasonable," he had replied, the same words he had said that night after professing his love to you. "i've simply been a bit caught up lately, that's all. i need my own time to write."

"seriously? that's what you're going to say?" you shook your head, crossing your arms as you looked at him pleadingly. "why are you acting like this? do you seriously think being a bit older than me justifies how you've been treating me?"

"that has nothing to do with our situation," he snapped sharply, then sighed. "please, can we go to bed? i'm tired of this." he started towards the bedroom door, leaving you behind him.

"you never answered my question."

he stopped.

"it's okay, el," you'd whispered. "i had a feeling i already knew. i was just hoping you would at least be able to tell me."

so now, here he is. unable to finish the sequel to his novel because he'd dedicated the first one to you, and what's the point of writing a second one if you're no longer by his side?

what's the point if you have sebastian now, who spends every second with you? who is much younger than him and rides a motorcycle? who gives you a mermaid's pendant — a year after the two of you separated, by the way — and makes sure the entire town can make it to your wedding?

he doesn't know what you see in him. sure, his passion for music is a bit admirable, but can he really treat you properly? there's no way seb can make you smile, make you laugh, make you cry out of pure joy or pleasure like he did.

elliott had attended the wedding, of course, so he could make sure you were happy.

he most certainly wasn't hoping to see a twinge of hesitation, maybe even regret in your eyes as you walked down the aisle again.

as elliott abandons his writing and heads out the doorway of his cabin, the image of you happier than he'd ever seen you while passionately kissing sebastian is burned into his mind.

you are no longer his, and it's entirely his fault.

[glitch-but-ya]

Remember me.

Pairing: Sylus x Reader

Tags: Angst, angst, angst, with no comfort, established relationship, pet names like 'sweetie' and 'kitten', descriptions of blood, gore, and death.

Summary: Sylus could not fathom the feeling of everything slipping from his fingers. He couldn’t comprehend how he had lost control so easily. He watched you take a devastating blow from a wanderer, helpless to reach you in time. His world crumbled before his eyes as you fell. In that moment, Sylus realized he had less control over fate than he had ever imagined. Though you had awoken from your injuries, the relief would not last, for he would soon be dragged back into a spiral of helplessness once more.

Word count: 2,281 words.

A/N: Feeling angsty lately hehehe

"And even in my dying breath, my only thoughts will be of you."

The blood wouldn't stop. It gushed out of the gigantic wound in your stomach ceaselessly, erupting with remarkable fervor. The blood continued to flow, slipping between Sylus's fingers as his hands latched onto your stomach in an attempt to stop the bleeding. But it didn't work. Nothing did. And for the first time in his life, Sylus felt helpless.

He clenched his jaw, his teeth gritting. "Don't you dare die on me." You responded with a kind smile. Your hand reached out to caress the side of his face. "I won't make it, Sylus." You croaked out weakly. "Don't try to save a dying person."

He shook his head and curled his fists. "Don't speak nonsense. I'm not in the mood for jokes." And although his tone was harsh, his words held no bite. You knew that, of course. What part of him did you not know? Which part of him had you not learned by heart yet?

"Hold on to me," he said, guiding your hands to his neck. "I'll get us out of here, and you'll get better. I promise." "You won't die." he said firmly. You've never seen him so serious. Not with you, at least.

Sylus carried you back to his car. His arms supported your back as you hung limply from his neck. You used your last remaining strength to pry your eyes open and gaze back at the protofield. You hadn't yet processed how a normal mission could turn into an event that'd end up claiming your life. You were prepared for this, you told yourself. This is the unfair life a hunter must live. This is the sacrifice you must make for the sake of others. But now, being on the verge of death, you couldn't help but wish to live.

Your gaze drew back to Sylus. You observed his furrowed eyebrows, his sorrowful frown, and the panic etched across his face. You couldn't help but be grateful for him. To have a man like him was a blessing. He was kind to you. When you needed him, he was there. He had cradled you through the harshest nights and been by your side through happiness and sorrow. He was there, always. Even now, in death, he was by your side. It was by miracle that he happened to be in the same place, close enough to you to respond to your plea for help immediately.

You couldn't help but feel thankful for him. To have someone like him in your life was a blessing only you were lucky enough to receive. After his arrival, you had something to live for. Someone cared about you, someone worth living for. And, admittedly, you didn't want to let this privilege go. You loved him, and you knew for sure that he reciprocated. You wanted to be selfish. For once, you wanted to live.

"Sylus..." you wheezed. His gaze immediately shifted. His eyes locked onto yours, slightly narrowing in displeasure at your weak countenance. "Save your breath. No need to say anything." he looked away, almost as if he couldn't bear to see you in such a sorry state anymore.

You simpered at him lovingly. "Thank you," was all you said. Sylus did not respond for a while, his only response being a slight falter in his speed. "Don't get sentimental now," he looked away. But you could catch a glimpse of the slight tremble of his lips. It was the first time you'd seen him so vulnerable, almost on the verge of tears. And even now, he tried to be strong. He tried to conceal his sorrow, even though he knew he didn't need to. Not around you. And yet, he was so adamant on being your devout protector, he’d forgotten that he was allowed to feel. You wanted to press your lips against his, to hug him in your arms and tell him that he could stop now. That he didn't have to make such sacrifices for your sake, that he was allowed to cry if he wanted to.

But alas, your strength began to fail you. And slowly, you began to fade into a deep slumber, lulled by the warmth of his body pressing against yours. You could hear Sylus's voice calling out to you, begging you to stay with him. But you couldn't. A gentle breeze blew you away easily as if you were but a tiny fairy floating about freely in the land of purgatory. Your eyes fluttered shut, only eliciting more panicked noises from him. But they were all drowned by the welcoming darkness. And so, your eyes closed, but not for the last time.

It wouldn't be long before you'd realize that you'd survived. When you awoke, it was atop a familiar mattress as hard as stone. It was clear that someone had tucked you in gingerly, layering multiple soft blankets beneath you in a flimsy attempt at cushioning you. Despite Sylus's efforts, the rigidity and firmness of the mattress pressed against your back painfully, leaving you with a sore back. Even with the lack of effectiveness in his approach, you found Sylus's attempt oddly endearing. You giggled internally, picturing a worried Sylus hurriedly skittering about and fussing over your makeshift bed.

Your carefreeness was cut off the moment you opened your mouth to speak. You felt a lump in your throat that felt as if it bobbled each time you gulped. On top of that, your throat was dry, and your voice low and hoarse. You quickly realized that you had not the strength to even lift your arm off the bed, let alone get up and call for help. You didn't know where Sylus was. All you could do was wait until he showed up eventually, which didn't take long.

"Sweetie," his pupils contracted subtly. You couldn't tell if it was a response brought about by relief or shock, or both. Were you not supposed to wake up so soon?

Dropping the towels by your bed, Sylus fixed his composure and rushed to your side, taking your arm in his. "How are you feeling?" "Horrible." you croaked out with a small laugh. "I feel like I'm gonna die," you said, but the joke didn't seem to sit right with Sylus, on whose forehead a crinkle had formed. He made it very clear that he did not find it funny.

Changing the topic, you let out a hum. "How long has it been?" "A week." You nearly choked on your own spit, but said nothing in response. You didn't have the energy to. Sylus caressed your hand thoroughly, his eyes slightly narrowing as he felt your skin. But you couldn't tell why. "We didn't know if you were going to, well... do you remember what happened?" You placed your finger on your lip, humming in thought, before nodding weakly. "You got discharged yesterday. I guess you're really taking a turn for the better, huh?" And yet, as he spoke, he did not smile. He only inspected your hand further, running his fingers over the bumps of your knuckles, and tenderly tracing the skin of your palm. "...Did you always have cold hands, sweetie?"

You only responded by pointing to the jug of water on the large, ebony nightstand. Following your request, Sylus grabs the jug and pours you a glass of water. "Here, I'll help you." he helps you sit up and brings the glass to your lips. Only for you to begin choking on the water as you drank. Sylus patted your back reassuringly. "You've been quite... breathless, haven't you? Your breathing is faster, and so is your heart rate." He placed his hand on his chin and thought. "Your face is pale, your hands are cold. And—are you listening?"

You stared at him before flashing him with a sheepish smile. "Sorry, can you repeat?" He let out a sigh. "I'm calling a doctor over. You're displaying abnormal symptoms." Your hands began to tremble uncontrollably as you passed him the glass. "Doctor? I feel fine." You waved your hand dismissively. "You're overreacting. I woke up, didn't I? It means I'm getting better." Sylus shook his head. "Right. And that also means it's time for a checkup. Don't resist, sweetie. You're not escaping this one." Although he tried to mask it, you could sense an underlying fear in his tone. You didn't know why. You truly did feel fine.

"He'll be here in a few hours. The snowfall's heavy tonight. It'll take a while." He pulled the covers over you and nuzzled your face. "Until then, rest." With that, he left the room.

A few hours had gone by, and your condition only worsened. Your skin grew colder, and your heart began to beat at a rapid rate. To add to Sylus's concern, your behavior and mental state began to worsen as well. When he'd ask you something, you'd stare at him for a good 30 seconds before smiling, "Sorry, could you repeat that?"

Eventually, your bandages began to bleed once more, and you felt as if you were rendered completely senile, like a sickly old man spending his last moments on his deathbed. You managed to squeeze out your dying voice to ask Sylus to change them. He gently propped you up, pulling off your shirt before carefully unwrapping the bandages around your chest.

"Sylus..." "Didn't I tell you to save your energy?" he scolded softly. "The doctor will be here in an hour." He pressed the back of his palm against your forehead. "Cold. Don't worry, I'll patch you up and tuck you back in." Suddenly, you grasped his hand weakly. He didn't have the heart nor intention to shake you off. "Thank you." Your gaze did not meet his.

Sylus tilted his head back and smirked lightly. "What, are we feeling affectionate now too?" It seemed as if he was trying to swallow the ache of his heart. You shook your head, your eyes glued to your lap. "I'm sorry. I'm so much trouble." Fresh tears began to slip from the corners of your eyes, only to be swept up by Sylus's hand before they could reach your chin. "I was weak. I know I've failed everyone."

"Sweetie..." his hand met your cheek, his thumb flicking off the crystalline beads rolling down your face. "I never saw you as a burden. The strength needed to withstand such a blow... your dodge was incredible, kitten." His other hand shot up to ruffle your hair. "Even I would have a hard time. You did well. I'm proud of you."

You let out a muffled sob. "Will you remember me, Sylus?" His gaze softened. He could reassure you that you wouldn't be leaving his side anytime soon and that there was no reason for him to have to remember you, but he knew that wasn't what you wanted to hear. "You're quite hard to forget, if I'm being honest. Even if we are worlds apart, you will linger in my memories eternally, shining like the most priceless gem not even the God of wealth could lay their eyes on." He gazed upon your face, taking in the sight of your drooping eyelids, inflamed nose, chapped lips, and pale visage with a wince. "We are bound by much more than a simple promise. What we have will never be replaced." His eyes met yours. "I could never forget you, even if I wanted to."

Your shoulders slackened almost as if you'd let go, your soul finally able to rest now that you'd heard him say it with his own lips. "I love you, Sylus," you confirmed. He traced his thumb over your bottom lip. "I love you too." Sylus slipped the shirt back onto your body and pushed you into the covers. "Sleep," he said, picking up the clutter. Before he left, he turned to you and looked at you one last time. "When you're better, I'll take you to a meadow for a nice picnic under the warm sun." His gaze trembled, and he swallowed the melancholy beginning to invade his voice. "I know a place. A vast field of anemones and other flowers. The breeze there is cool and constant. It's a place humanity is yet to reach, untainted by the spoils of mankind." He approached you, slipping his fingers in between your own. "When you're better, I'll take you there." He flashed you the warmest smile he could muster, even in his state of despair.

His heart nearly broke as you so innocently smiled back at him. "I see. Thank you, Sylus. It sounds nice indeed." You brought his hand to your face and nuzzled against it. "May we cross the fields together one day."

"Go now. I'm sleepy." You began pushing him away, ushering him out of your bed. Once he was a good distance away, you sank into your bedsheets and turned your back on him. "Goodnight, Sylus. I love you." And so, you went to sleep.

You did not wake up the next day. So he waited. Although Sylus knew you wouldn't last the moment you'd displayed the symptoms. He'd seen death; he'd known it half his life. He could tell when a man was about to die from a distance. And yet, with you, he couldn't bring himself to accept it.

And so, he waited again. For you to wake up. For you to return to him once more. He would wait until the heat death of the universe, if he must, just to reunite with you, his beloved, his lover. He couldn't stop the tears from flowing. He'd lost you again. And this time, it was his beloved who was gone.

[a-spes]

This Dream Is Not Feeling Sweet. A part of the "Devious Lies" series — Alternative Ending. (2,315 words).

| SUMMARY — Alternative ending in which Reader died, because the og ending was apparently not sad enough for some you lmao.

" And your story may have ended in a messy way, with blood, and tears, and words that will never be spoken, but the woman realized that she wouldn't have it any other way, cherishing every moment you had shared together. "

| TAGS & WARNINGS — Natasha Romanoff x Reader. Death (R), heavy angst with no comfort (and I think that's all?)

| SERIES MASTERLIST & MAIN MASTERLIST.

It was not raining, and yet the woman could feel droplets trickling down her skin. Unstoppable ones, that always came back, even after she had wiped them for what may be the tenth time.

But Natasha is firm, and she says she does not crying, refusing the comfort that some of her mates were trying to provide.

She doesn't need it.

Or, more exactly, she knew they couldn't give her the comfort she was craving, their gentleness being nothing more than a painful reminder of the things she had lost.

Their soft words could never be as significant as yours, and their embrace as reassuring.

She doesn't need it, she repeats, over, and over again, in her head but it is not enough to make the words more true.

Long ago, she was taught that pain only makes her stronger, and yet she has never felt so in pain, and so weak, at the same time.

Get up, a voice was whispering in the back of her mind, but her body felt so heavy than even breathing became an impossible task.

These words, along side with the belief that emotions, and love, were weaknesses, were engraved in her being. It is an indelible mark she had never really rid herself of, a ghost from her past that sometimes still haunted the woman.

Ever since she was a kid, the redhead had danced with Death. She taunted It, played its sick games, but she never folded, and never a tear rolled down her cheek, never a cry shook her body.

Even when she became one of her henchwoman, taking more lives than she could ever count, painting her ledger with so much scarlet that she might never be able to get rid of it. Even when she had lost some of the people she considered as her friends.

Her visage has always been marked by indifference, Death never being as painful as it was right now.

Today, as she was standing in front of your grave, she could felt every barrier she had ever built shattering, to weak to prevent the tears from flowing.

She had tried to stop them, the woman bitting her trembling lips until she draws blood, but no amount of pretending could ever be enough to stop the feelings that were hitting her. These were comparable to an unstoppable, and huge, wave that was about to take everything away in its path.

But things were different this time.

You taught her that love may be a weakness, but that it could also be the greatest thing. One that makes it worth living. You taught her how to be vulnerable, even thought she was frightened by the idea of trusting someone.

Because you are the one who taught her that some risks were worth being taken.

And your story may have ended in a messy way, with blood, and tears, and words that will never be spoken, but the woman realized that she wouldn't have it any other way, cherishing every moment you had shared together.

Two years went by since you left, and yet it is as if you were never really gone as the woman was constantly thinking about you — How could she not? You were in every night she has spent starring at the ceiling, in every corner of the compound, her memories of you being permanent reminder of the things she has lost.

Or, more exactly, of the things she has ruined because she was too scared to admit the truth.

The woman had looked at those pictures so many times that they were engraved in her mind, hauting her when she closed her eyes. She held into these as the reminder of the things you have done, as the evidence that she was right for the way she treated you.

Yet, deep down, she knew.

The women has always knew that something wasn't right with those, that it doesn't sound like something you would ever do — But don't we say that we never really know the people we are living with?

She had been so angry when she learned about what happened that it clouded her jugdment, and when the hatred of the first days eventually washed out, it was only to be replaced by somethong more vicious — Denial.

The thought that you were better without her, that she would've ended up hurting you anyway, eventually crept inside her. But the woman knows now that it was only an excuse, and a pitful one, to not admit her mistakes, to not face her fears. It is an old habit of hers that she went back to at the first difficulties — Running away.

She was scared, and as lost as when you met for the first time, and thought that, if she left first, if it was her decision, then maybe the situation would hurt less.

A false impression of doing the right thing, encouraged by the others, led her to think that everything was right.

Yet, she knew it wasn't true.

All these nights, when she had to listen to them sharing their hatred about you as if this mistake was the only think you have ever done in your life, and all these days, when she had to walk on the streets, reading the articles that were spreading lies about the person you were, as if this one mistake could erase the hero you once were, she knew that things weren't right.

Yet, her lips remained shut, and as time went by, it only became harder to speak out, the silence being oddly comfortable despite the price it came with. She should have spoken up, and at least try to defend you, but the woman never found the courage to do so.

Despite the soft promises, she had let you down, and that more times than she is willing to admit.

The woman had loose herself in her flaws, acting selfishly, and this is a crime she would never forgive herself for comitting. Especially because she had no explanation for her attitude, or at least none that would be more than an excuse for her cowardice.

She choose to act as if you have never existed, because she thought that it would make things easier, because that is what she does when her life becomes complicated — She runs away, and bury her emotions deep in her heart with the hope they won't resurface.

But if she thought that it would be easier to turn her back on you completely, the woman eventually realized that she was wrong, and that hiding didn't make any of it more bearable. The regrets she had buried deep inside of her, the ones she had hidden under a thick layer of anger and hatred, eventually resurfaced to hit her twice as hard as before once she realized that she was not hating you as much as she thought she was.

The truth is that her whole soul was longing for your presence, and she was angry at herself for that. The woman would have gave up everything she has only to see your smile one more time, to regain the comfort of your embrace.

But the realization came too late.

Two years went by since you left. Two years during which she preferred the comfort of ignorance instead of taking the decision to pursue you, ruining her own oppurtunity for a second chance.

Natasha could never forget the moment you left, and for ever this time — How could she, when felt you slipping through her arms, and your body becoming limp in her grasp. When she saw your eyes closing, only to never open again. When she noticed the way your lips stopped trembling, and your chest stopped rising.

She heard it, your last shaky breath before a heavy silence settled in, but she still refused to admit you were gone.

The woman had screamed, this day. She had begged deities that she doesn't even believe in, and pray anyone that could hear her pleas to give you back. But despite her cries, your body remained cold against her chest, and no amount of tears will ever be enough to bring back someone from the deads.

Death can't be changed, it is for ever.

Yet, some days, it was like you were never gone. From your favorite dish in the fridge to your favorite movie on television, everything was then a painful reminder of your absence. She could see your smile in the sun's rays, and hear your soft voice in the night, and as every corner of the city was associated with a memory of you, it was impossible for the woman to escape your ghost.

You were everywhere, hauting her life every minute, and especially her thoughts. She had replayed the events thousands of time in her mind, imagining all the things she could have done for your story to end diffirently. She had thought about all the things she should have said but kept for herself, all the times she wasn't brave enough to do the right thing.

You wouldn't be dead if she had listened to you, that day.

You wouldn't be dead if she didn't decide to be selfish, and to choose to save herself over yours.

She vowed to protect you, swore to always be by your side, promised under the stars that she would never stop loving you, but she eventually broke every of her words.

She should have been here, by your side, and not only in your last moment, but also the years that came before. She thought the situation was unfair to her, being deceived by the woman she loved, but she was so far from the truth. But, when the reality of the events has eventually been revealed, it was already too late.

A part of her died that day

A part of her that she will never be able to get back, the best of her, the hero she used to be — If she couldn't save you, what was the point? Why continuing when she couldn't save the only live that really mattered?

Slowly, the woman pulled away from the team. At first, she requested only a break of a few weeks, and it was granted to her without a question. Everyone knew she was affected by the events, but none of them could have guessed that it would led her to never come back — How could she?

She wasn't feeling like a hero anymore.

The desire to do good had been drowned out by anger and hatred, and if she was blaming herself, she was also blaming every of her coworkers. She was angry at Fury who kept sending you on dangerous missions despite your state, at Clint who convinced her to rest, and at the rest team who lost the only track they had of you.

The woman was sure that if you didn't go on that mission, if she had been with them, or if they hadn't fail to find you a few hours earlier, then you would still be here. Maybe not by her side, but at least alive.

Your funerals were held in secrecy. You didn't have much family anyway, and so only the team has been here. Not a word was exchanged during the ceremony, and no one dared to give speech.

What could they have said, anyway?

She could've explained what a beautiful soul you were, how she had loved you, and how the world should be grateful for your services, but it felt wrong, especially after all the things she had done.

It is when you were still alive that you needed to be loved.

And now that you were gone it was too late to repare the damages that she had caused to your heart, and reputation.

Despite her attempts to make the truth known, the world wasn't willing to listen, and the hatred that raised after the original events couldn't be undone, and even thought you died as a hero, no one is ever going to treat you as one.

The beast is dead, along with some other harmul words has been written on your tomb. When the rumors about your death eventually spread, some found your grave, but their intentions were everything but pure. The sight of your beautiful grave being damaged made the woman angry, because she couldn't stand the way they kept disrupting your slumber, as if you hadn't suffered enough in the last years of your life.

The world should have remained thankful for the things you've done for them, instead of hating you at the first occasion. If she had her reasons for the way she acted, they didn't.

She came regurarly, almost every day, to clean your tombstone, making sure that the flowers never wither. They are probably going to be stolen soon, by someone that thinks they deserve them more than you do, but it is not enough to convince her to stop.

Under her breath, the woman is whispering sweet words that she can only hope you will here from where you are. It is all the words that she couldn't bring herself to tell you when she should have, when it wasn't already too late. It is all the excuses and regrets she had never been courageous enough to share, and all the "I love you" that were stuck in her mind.

It is all the things that she couldn't gather the courage to say, at least not before you were already gone, unable to hear them. If words could heal hearts, they couldn't reverse death, and it is a lesson the woman learned too late.

[intriq]

Daffodil

Part of my Hanahaki series

Character: Jason Todd

Theme: Angst

Daffodil: regard, unequalled love

‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎┏━•❃°•°❀°•°❃•━┓

You've known Jason for awhile. You've been friends for a few years at this point.

You've seen him change and grow. Grieved him when he died, welcomed him back when he returned. Supported him when he needed it, because truthfully? He did need it. Even if he was a stubborn asshole about it.

But you also loved him throughout those years. Through all those changes.

You loved him when he died, loved him when you visited his headstone, and you loved him even when he came back. You just always did.

But you also knew he never loved you back. He was never quite capable of seeing of just how head over heels you were for him, even though his family could. To him, you were always just his "best friend".

You thought you could be happy like that, you truly did. You thought you could be content loving him from the sidelines, even if it was suffocating knowing he would never love you back. You thought you'd be okay.

Until you coughed up those flower petals.

You remember the exact day you first discovered you had Hanahaki Disease, too.

It'd been a cloudless night, the first one in a few days. Maybe weeks. Either way, for once Gotham was not shrouded by storm clouds. It was at most, calm. Peaceful. But perhaps that in of itself should have been an omen.

Because Gotham was never peaceful.

You don't remember exactly what was said that night, but you just remember how you'd started coughing the moment Jason was distracted. Had you two been on a stakeout that night? You were almost sure that you were.

You remember so vividly clutching those flower petals in your hands, staring at them before crushing them in your palm, letting them drift in the wind when Jason asks you if you were alright.

And now here you were, months later. Over time Jason would give you suspicious looks when you'd tried to hide your coughing fits, would always double check if you were really okay. But you always said you were.

Until today.

You and Jason are doing the last of your stakeout mission, gathering the last tiniest bits of intel to feed to the others so that way they could take out this newly fledged gang from right under their nose. It's cold, but that's fine. Gotham is always cold, especially in the autumn months.

"How much longer are we supposed to be out here for?"

You pause to think for a minute as your eyes scan the outside of the warehouse the gang had turned into their main base of operations. Taking in every detail, hoping it’d help piece together some of their behavior.

“Not that much longe—“ Your words are cut off by that feeling in your throat, hand flying up reflexively as you scramble to remove your mask just in time to violently begin coughing into the palm of your hand.

You hunch into yourself as you cough, your free hand clutching your mask desperately so you could put it back on at a moments notice. Next to you, Jason is concerned. Behind the red helmet he wears his face is a mixture of concern.

It takes awhile for you to stop coughing. The raw creeping pain that fills your throat and makes your lungs burn is something you’ve grown used to.

You pull your hand away when you feel that same familiar feeling of blood in your hands, wet and hot as it pairs with your spit and the flowers. You try to hide it from Jason, you really do. You try to clench your fist and let it drop to your side.

But Jason is faster. He’s got your hand snagged by the wrist the moment it drops. And he pries your hand open while he remains quiet. And when he sees the flowers and blood in your hands he knows he should’ve done so sooner.

You’d been hiding behind the coughing fits for awhile. Pulling excuses out of the air for each one. Making up reasons for your dwindling strength and stamina, for how your skin got progressively more sickly and pale.

Excuses each and every time that Jason now regrets not looking deeper into.

“Fucking Hanahaki Disease? Seriously?” Jason doesn’t hesitate to say your name in that same tone. He’s angry, but he’s worried. An angry kind of concerned and worried, because for months you’ve probably been suffering alone. And to him, he doesn’t want his best friend to suffer alone. He’s had to do that already, he knows it’s shitty.

“Why didn’t you tell me? Who is it?”

“It’s not important, Red. Doesn’t matter—“

Jason stops you, the grip on your wrist tightening for a moment as he seems to be trying at least a little bit to regulate his emotions.

“Screw that. It’s Jason your talking to right now, not Red Hood.”

“Jason—“

“No! It does fucking matter, okay? Your.. Fuck, you’re my friend, okay? I care about what’s happening to you.”

Your heart aches at the word friend, makes the suffocating feeling in your throat grow tighter. Friend. Of course. That was all you’d ever be to him.

“It’s just a little one sided love, Jason.”

“Little? You call coughing up blood and flowers little? Your dying!”

Your face scrunches up as you begin sputtering again, coughing as more specks of blood fly past your lips.

“If it’s one sided, you need to get the surgery. It’s the only option.”

Immediately your shaking your head, trying to refuse, but Jason’s already picking you up. He’s already died once, brought back by chance because of the Lazarus Pit. He’s not gonna have you die, because you matter to him.

He ignores your protesting pleas as you eventually fall unconscious from the lack of air you are able to get into your lungs because of the flowers growing there.

And Jason brings you to Gotham General.

But when you awaken from that lifesaving surgery, preventing you from dying on the operating table as you were seconds from death, Jason noticed your different with him.

He can see just how different you look at him. You aren’t the same you that he remembers growing up with. The look in your eyes is different, as is your smile.

You aren’t quite as warm, not quite that same ball of sunshine with him as you used to be. At first he thinks it’s because your mad at him for bringing you to the hospital against your wishes, but..

Even when months pass and you still don’t get that same energy you used to back is when he understands. It hits him when your suddenly looking at someone else the way you used to look at him and it hits him hard, like a smack to the face.

Oh. He thinks. He was the one you loved.

And that regret hits Jason hard, especially when he coughs up flower petals of his own.

‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎ ‎‎┗━•❃°•°❀°•°❃•━┛

[kinzhae]

Sailor﹏𓊝﹏

Set in Jujutsu High, 2006, Second-Year Timeline

Gojo x Fem!Reader

Angst with no comfort.

Pls don't let this flop 💔

Spring Nights at Jujutsu High...

The spring air smelled of sakura blossoms and mischief as you sat on the rooftop of Jujutsu High's dormitories, your legs swinging over the edge. The distant hum of Tokyo's lights flickered on the horizon, a reminder of the world beyond the chaos of curses and missions. The night was quiet except for the occasional sound of laughter from the courtyard below—students blowing off steam after an especially grueling week.

And then there was Gojo.

He emerged like he always did: unbothered and obnoxiously tall, his silver hair messy from the wind. He was carrying a bag of snacks he’d likely stolen from Ijichi’s stash. Gojo’s presence was never subtle. Even before he spoke, you could feel the weight of his energy pressing against you, warm and electric.

“I knew I’d find you up here,” he said, plopping down beside you, close enough that his knee brushed yours. He unwrapped a lollipop and popped it into his mouth.

“You’re like a bad habit,” you muttered, taking a drag from the vape pen you’d smuggled into the school.

He smirked. “A habit you can’t quit.”

♡♡﹏𓊝﹏

The Way He Looked at You

He didn’t make it easy. Gojo Satoru had always been more than a little infuriating. He knew how to get under your skin, but it wasn’t just his teasing or his stupidly attractive smirk that kept you off balance. It was the way he looked at you—like you were the only thing in the world worth paying attention to.

Tonight was no different.

“You know, when you sit here like this, with the city lights behind you, you kind of look like Anne Hathaway,” he said, resting his chin on his hand as he studied your face.

You snorted. “What, from Princess Diaries?”

He grinned. “Nah, from The Devil Wears Prada. You’ve got that whole ‘too cool for this’ thing down, but with just enough softness to keep me interested.”

“Softness?” You raised an eyebrow, blowing out a cloud of vapor. “You’re imagining things.”

“Am I?” His grin widened as he leaned closer, stealing the pen from your fingers. “You wouldn’t let me sit this close if you weren’t soft on me.”

You tried to snatch it back, but he held it just out of reach, laughing when you gave up with a groan.

♡♡﹏𓊝﹏

The World Fades Away..

It wasn’t always fun and games with Gojo. When it was just the two of you, the walls he put up for everyone else seemed to crumble. You’d seen him at his most raw—after missions that went sideways, after friends were hurt or worse. Those moments made it hard to stay mad at him, no matter how much he annoyed you.

“Do you ever think about leaving?” you asked suddenly, breaking the comfortable silence.

He paused, the lollipop stick dangling from his lips. “Leaving Jujutsu High?”

You nodded.

Gojo’s smile faltered, just for a second, but he recovered quickly. “Sometimes. But then I think about what I’d miss.” He nudged your shoulder. “Like you.”

“You’re such a sap,” you teased, though your chest felt tight.

“Only for you.” He wasn’t joking, not this time.

♡♡﹏𓊝﹏

Won’t you kiss me on the mouth and love me like a sailor?..

It happened before you could think—his hand cupping your cheek, his lips brushing yours. The kiss was as reckless and consuming as Gojo himself, leaving you breathless and buzzing.

When he pulled back, his eyes were alight with mischief. “Well? What’s my flavor?”

You rolled your eyes, trying to play it cool despite the heat rising to your cheeks. “Annoying. With a hint of cherry.”

He laughed, throwing his head back, and for a moment, the weight of the world didn’t exist.

“You’re lucky I like annoying things,” you shot back, crossing your arms in mock defiance. But the warmth in your voice betrayed you, and Gojo, ever perceptive, noticed.

He tilted his head, his grin softening. “You know, you’re pretty bad at hiding how much you like me.”

You scoffed, turning your gaze back to the horizon. “And you’re pretty bad at staying humble.”

He leaned back on his hands, letting out a dramatic sigh. “Why should I be humble when I’ve already got the best thing in the world sitting right next to me?”

“You’re unbearable,” you muttered, though your lips twitched upward despite yourself.

Gojo studied you for a moment, the laughter in his expression giving way to something more serious. “You ever think about what we’re fighting for?”

The question hung heavy in the air.

“Sometimes,” you admitted. “When it’s quiet, like this.”

He nodded, his gaze fixed on the sky. “It’s funny, isn’t it? We spend so much time fighting things most people can’t even see. We save lives they don’t even know are in danger. And yet...” He trailed off, his voice dropping. “Sometimes it feels like it doesn’t matter. Like it’s never enough.”

You turned to him, your heart aching at the rare vulnerability in his voice. Without thinking, you reached out, your hand finding his. His fingers curled around yours, strong and steady.

“It matters to me,” you said quietly. “You matter to me.”

For once, he didn’t have a witty comeback. Instead, he looked at you like you were the only thing holding him together.

♡♡﹏𓊝﹏

Hating the Wait...

You leaned back, your head resting against his shoulder as the sky began to lighten. “It’s crazy,” you said quietly.

“What is?”

“How much I hate being away from you. Even sleeping feels like too long to wait.”

Gojo chuckled, the sound low and warm. “So, what I’m hearing is that you’re obsessed with me.”

You rolled your eyes, but a smile tugged at your lips. “Maybe a little.”

“Good.” He tightened his arm around you, his voice dropping to a whisper. “Because I don’t want to wait either.”

♡♡﹏𓊝﹏

The Night’s Promise..

The two of you stayed on the rooftop until the first hints of dawn began to creep over the horizon. When Gojo finally stood, pulling you up with him, he didn’t let go of your hand.

“Let’s run away,” he said suddenly, his tone light but his eyes serious.

You blinked at him. “What?”

“Just for a day,” he clarified. “No curses, no missions, no responsibilities. Just you and me, doing whatever the hell we want.”

“And where exactly would we go?”

“Anywhere.” He grinned, swinging your hand playfully. “We could hole up in some cheap ramen shop or sneak into a movie theater. Or we could drive to the coast and pretend we’re sailors, running away from the world."

You couldn’t help but laugh. “Sailors?”

“Yeah.” His grin turned softer, more genuine. “We’d be free. Just for a little while.”

The idea was ridiculous. Irresponsible. Impossible.

But with Gojo, it felt like anything could be real.

“Okay,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. “Let’s do it.”

His smile lit up the entire rooftop. “That’s my girl.”

And in that moment, with his hand in yours and the weight of the world forgotten, you thought that maybe, just maybe, he really could be your savior.

♡...﹏𓊝﹏....♡

Why wait?...

The house was silent, save for the occasional creak of the floorboards and the distant hum of the wind outside. You sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the empty pillow beside you. The blankets were untouched on his side, as if you’d been too afraid to disturb the last remnant of him.

Your voice came out weak, shaky, and tired as you whispered to no one, “I want to go back…”

The words hung in the air, heavy with the weight of longing. You were sleepless, your mind caught in a cruel loop of memories—his laughter, his teasing, the way his hand had felt so solid and sure in yours.

But now, that hand was gone, and the other side of the bed had been cold for days.

You clutched the fabric of your shirt over your chest, as if pressing against your heart might stop it from aching so much. The emptiness in the house wasn’t just physical; it was suffocating, a void that swallowed every ounce of your strength.

Whenever you closed your eyes, he was there.

You’d see his smirk, hear his voice, and feel the warmth of his touch as if he were still beside you. But then you’d wake up, and the cold, stark reality would hit you like a curse you couldn’t exorcise.

“What’s the point?” you murmured, your voice barely audible. “Why wait for someone who’s dead?”

You wanted to scream at yourself, to shake away the foolish hope that clung to your chest like a parasite. Satoru was gone. No amount of waiting, wishing, or praying would bring him back. You knew that. You’d seen it with your own eyes, felt the world crumble beneath your feet the moment his light went out.

But the memories wouldn’t let you go.

You remembered the way he’d look at you, so full of life and mischief, as if daring the universe itself to try and stop him. You remembered the quiet moments, too—when the bravado melted away, and he was just Satoru, the boy who carried too much but still made room to carry you.

"You are my savior, savior from this dull life... Satoru."

.

.

.

.

[sillygoosealert]

UUUUUH SAD ANGST SAD ANGST IDEA

Terminally Ill reader who doesn’t treat it and hides it from Bi-Han because he’ll think it’s weakness, and he’s super hard on them for being ‘lazy’ until one day he wakes up to them cold beside him in bed (Bi-Han pov for extra angst)

STOP THIS INES GETTING TO ME

Are you ignoring me? Answer me..

Bi-han angst, no comfort

It’s 4:00 in the morning, it’s time to get up

However, you have trouble even processing that

It's like you’re in rim sleep- 24/7

This upsets Bi-Han greatly, as his spouse, you should be better than this

And he lets you know this

Every day

And every time he sees you

After his habit of nit-picking started, you looked even more exhausted 

He would feel pity and let you take a break- if you hadn't started to slack off

Maybe you thought he didn't notice when you stopped to go dry heave for a minute and then continue

Or when you sat down for a minute after only an hour or two of work

He did.

And he wasn't thrilled about the whispers and looks not only you, but he got after you started

Most of them were indifferent- or pitiful

And he hated that

People were pitting you for no reason, not one good enough at least

When you got to your room that night, he snapped

‘Do you know what I saw today?’ he hisses, furrowing his eyebrows

‘No, what did you see hun?’ you are whispering, not sure what he's mad at- or who he’s mad at

‘You sitting down, while on duty’ now he’s fuming, he can’t help when he gets mad. He has his fathers rage

‘I had to take a moment to rest, it isn’t easy working for hours at a time’ You look tired, you’re pale, skin sunken in around your eyes

He noticed, but he noticed other people just like doing their work too

‘Are you pregnant?’

‘What? No, I would tell you if I was pregnant.’ you look..upset? If anyone should be upset it should be him

‘Then you have no excuse. Nothing is stopping you from doing your work.’

You don't say anything as you reach for the door

‘Where are you going?’

‘I’m not sleeping with you tonight.’

He says nothing as you leave

The next day he sees you, yet says nothing

He's too busy anyways

You come back to your room that night, you're actually there before he arrives

Pathetic

He says nothing as you shiver and cough and wheeze

‘I love you’

He hears you whisper not long after he gets into bed

‘Get some rest, I know you need it’

That was his way of saying it back, you knew it

He was far from pleased with your recent performance- but he would never let you think he didn't love you

‘Can you say it back?’

‘Why? We've talked about this before..’

He has told you he isn't fond of saying it

It isn't him

‘Goodnight Bi-Han.’

You're ignoring his question

He doesn't know why, and it upsets him

So he turns away from you as he closes his eyes and eventually falls asleep

When he wakes up and turns to you, your back is facing him

He shakes you gently

But no response

So he shakes you a little harder

No response

‘You have to get up today, I'll give you a few more minutes but that's it.’

After he dresses he goes back for you

‘I know you're awake, and I know you're upset..’

He cares about you, he really does. He wants to pour his heart out every time he has the pleasure of holding you in his arms

He wants to say ‘i love you’ every night and every morning, to make sure you remembered

He wants to start a family with you, and hold you close when you are with child- with his child

And he wants to tell you that

But he won't, or maybe he just can't

‘And we can talk about it later, however we have to get up’

You don't even move to look at him

‘Are you ignoring me?’

Maybe he should understand- give you space and time

But he doesn't understand, he didn't do anything in his eyes

‘Answer me. Are you ignoring me?’

The silence is loud and he stomps over to the bed, forcefully turning you over

Tears stain your cheeks as your eyes are glazed over

An empty look for a once-radiant person

Then he lets go of your cold, lifeless body

There is nothing left in you

It's gone- everything is gone and the world isn't spinning anymore

He isn't breathing

Or blinking

He's just staring

He didn't even realize he was backing up until he backed into a wall

Then he goes to the bed a checks for a pulse

Nothing

He picks up your body and cradles it

His own tears now staining your face

He knows he couldn't have changed you dying

Well, maybe he could have

But he really wishes you knew he at least cared about you

But you didn't

And you never would

🎀

[iomoru]

ioo!!! hope you're having a good day and if you aren't, i hope it gets better! if you're in the mood, can you do kinich x reader angst where he breaks up with the reader because he thinks he may not come back from the night warden wars and is scared so he doesn't want reader to feel hurt? you can end it with angst or fluff (eg, reader comforts him enough to not do it or he ends up doing it) idk if you get what i mean HAHA but ty if you choose to do this request!!

A Farewell Beneath The Stars...

A/n: im actually really glad you gave me this req earth anon! I haven't really done angst again for a while and YOU just gave me an idea for it (≡^∇^≡)

Genre: Canon Verse, Angst w/ no happy ending, Gn! Reader, Kinich x Reader (not anymore), Second Person, Proofread

Summary: Kinich decides to break up with you as the Night Warden Wars intensify. Fearing he may not return, he doesn't want you to endure the pain of waiting for him, only to be left with memories and loss. Despite your pleas, Kinich is determined to protect you from future heartbreak, even if it means walking away from the love of his life. As he leaves, you're left beneath the cold stars, shattered and alone, realizing there's no going back.

The night sky stretched infinitely above, a canopy of stars that seemed distant, cold. The gentle rustle of leaves filled the air as you stood at the edge of the forest, your heart pounding in your chest. Kinich was late. He was never late.

A soft crunch of footsteps on the dry leaves snapped you out of your thoughts. You turned around to see him standing there, his silhouette barely visible in the moonlight. He looked tired, his usually warm, amber eyes clouded with something you couldn’t quite place—something darker.

"Kinich?" You called out softly, stepping toward him, the air between you heavy with unspoken tension. "Where have you been?"

He didn’t answer right away, his gaze fixed on the ground. When he finally looked up, his eyes met yours, and you saw it—fear. Real, raw fear. The kind you hadn’t seen in him before.

"I’ve been thinking," he began, his voice low, almost strained. "About us."

Your heart stuttered in your chest. The air felt colder suddenly, and you could feel the shift in the atmosphere. You swallowed hard, stepping closer. "What do you mean?"

He ran a hand through his dark hair, frustration and fear warring on his face. "The Night Warden Wars...they’re getting worse. You know that." His voice faltered for a moment, and you could tell he was struggling to find the right words. "I might not come back."

The weight of his words hit you like a punch to the stomach. "Don’t say that...you’ll come back. You always do."

He shook his head, his jaw clenched as if the pain of what he was about to say was too much. "No, this time it’s different. You don’t understand. This time...I don’t know if I can promise that."

You could feel the tears burning behind your eyes, but you refused to let them fall. Not yet. "So, what? You’re just going to give up on us? Just like that?" Your voice cracked despite your best efforts to stay strong.

"It’s not giving up," he said, his voice growing quieter, more fragile. "I don’t want to hurt you more than I already have. If I don’t make it back...I can’t let you wait for me, hoping for something that might never come."

You shook your head in disbelief, stepping forward and grabbing his hand, the warmth of his skin grounding you. "Kinich, please. We’ve been through so much together, don’t push me away now."

His grip on your hand tightened for a brief moment before he slowly let go, stepping back as if creating more distance would make this easier for him. For both of you. "It’s because I love you that I have to do this," he whispered, his voice barely audible. "I can’t bear the thought of you waiting for someone who might never return. You deserve better than that...better than me."

Your chest ached, each word cutting deeper than the last. "So that’s it? You’re breaking up with me because you’re scared?"

"I’m breaking up with you because I know what’s coming." His voice trembled as he spoke, and for the first time, you saw the cracks in his facade. He was terrified. "I don’t want you to be left with nothing but memories and pain."

You took a step back, the distance between you growing not just physically but emotionally. Your voice was barely a whisper when you spoke again. "And what about my choice? What if I’m willing to take that risk?"

Kinich looked away, his fists clenched at his sides. "I can’t let you make that choice," he said, his voice hoarse. "Because if something happens to me, it’ll destroy you. And I can’t live with that."

The silence that followed felt suffocating. The stars above seemed to watch, indifferent to your heartbreak. You wanted to scream, to shake him, to make him see that you didn’t care about the risk. But deep down, you knew that nothing you said would change his mind.

Tears finally spilled down your cheeks, and you wiped them away angrily, hating yourself for showing weakness. "Fine," you whispered, your voice barely audible over the sound of your breaking heart. "If that’s what you want."

Kinich’s face crumpled for a moment, the pain of his own decision visible in the way his shoulders hunched, the way his jaw clenched. He took one last look at you, his eyes filled with regret and sorrow. "I’m sorry," he said, his voice cracking. "I’m so sorry."

And with that, he turned and walked away, his footsteps fading into the night, leaving you alone beneath the cold, uncaring stars. You stood there for what felt like an eternity, your heart shattered, the weight of his absence crushing you.

There was no going back now. He was gone, and you were left with nothing but the painful echoes of his goodbye.

A/n: ngl I genuinely love the ending

© ²⁰²⁴ ɪᴏᴍᴏʀᴜ ✰ do not repost, translate, plagiarize, use to train ai, or share my work on other social media platforms.

[r0mantic-f00l]

(sooo finally did it, sorry for posting late! just a fair warning, this is super sad, so read with discretion. also not proof read)

Just a Man

Sirius Black was pathetic.

Nothing more than a man who found delight in people's suffering.

In your suffering.

So you ended it with him. You did not know how, did not know where the strength and courage came from to put yourself first, yet you did know that the infatuation, the excitement that Sirius Black was, it faded. Like a mere illusion.

It was as if you woke up one day from a dream, or was it a nightmare? Is it possible for an experience to be both?

Every connection with him was cut off. You no longer talked to his friends, no longer possessed his shirts and vinyl albums and jewelry he had gifted you. You put it all in a box and left it outside his door.

It sounds as if it was easy, just leaving him in a heartbeat. Not loving him anymore. It was not easy, no. It was a battle. A battle with him, yes, because he refused to let go. But a battle with your heart too, because it refused to let go of him. Hope still lingered that perhaps all those things he would whisper to you in the midst of lust or drunkeness were true, were statements that he meant deeply.

You knew he didn't.

That's why you left.

But he couldn't leave you.

That is why Sirius Black was pathetic.

-♡-

The glow of the streetlight near to your apartment slid through the cracks of your window's blinds whilst you lied on your bed, reading a book that you had only begun a couple days beforehand.

Ticking of the clock that rested on your bedside table would distract you from your reading, reminding you that it was nearing midnight and you needed to get sufficient rest to make sure you would wake up the next day early enough to do everything you wanted to do.

However, the book was too captivating.

A knock on the door, followed by the shouting of your name finally dragged you away from the novel.

You knew who it was.

You hoped it wasn't him.

But you knew it would be.

You walked out of your bedroom and into the living room, where your front door was being abused by a repeated knocking.

Exasperated, you unlocked it and only opened the door by a smidge, a little crack showing two familiar faces.

Peter Pettigrew, holding up Sirius like a broken doll.

"No." You protested before Peter could even utter out a word.

The man sighed as he begged you silently with his eyes to listen to him whilst Sirius swayed where he stood.

"He keeps shouting your name."

"So?"

Peter scoffed.

"So he wants to talk to you, and he won't rest until he does."

"This is the fourth time this month, Peter." You spoke through gritted teeth, your patience running very thin.

"And it won't happen again. Promise."

It was an empty promise. Of course it was. Any promise made on Sirius' behalf always failed to come to fruition.

Yet before you could say anything further, Sirius murmured your name with his head hung low, seemingly too inebriated to recognise the door in front of him.

"I can't do this again, Peter. I want to move on." Subconsciously, you opened the door a bit further, the creaking noise gathering the attention of Sirius, who rose his head and widened his eyes when he saw your face.

He smiled widely, drunkenly, and cheered your name as if you were the answer to his prayers.

"I'll pick him up in the morning." Peter rushed his words out and left, making Sirius stumble in his footing and instead balance on the wall beside him, leaning against it as he grinned at you.

You sighed and fully opened the door, wrapping your arm around Sirius' back as you helped walk him into your apartment.

"Hello, my love." He murmured into your ear, the smell of vodka and cheap beer wafting into your nose as he leaned down to you.

You scowled and dropped him on your sofa, going to walk away to the kitchen to get him a drink of water before he held tightly onto your wrist.

"Where are you going?" Sirius pouted, like a spoilt child.

"Kitchen. Need to get you some water." You replied simply, and walked away when Sirius begrudgingly let go of your wrist.

The trinkle of water into the glass was not loud enough to cover Sirius' shouting as you stood by the sink, sighing as he spoke.

"Y-You would never beli-believed what happened to me tonight." Sirius slurred, turning around on the couch to face the kitchen.

"This girl, some random girl, came up to me and started- just started flirting!" He gasped out, shocked for some reason whilst you walked towards him with a glass in your hand.

"So, so I told her I have a girlfriend--"

"You don't have a girlfriend, Sirius." You placed the glass of water down in front of him and walked behind the couch.

The man grinned and rolled his head back, gazing at you with that typical arrogant, dangerous look.

"Yeah, but, I will do."

Your eyebrows furrowed as you crossed your arms.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

Sirius leaned forward and took a sip of his water, humming as he drank it, and placed it back down as he turned to face you.

"Well, whatever thing you're going through now, you-you'll snap out of it soon." He smiled and ran his hand through his hair.

"And we'll be back together like nothing happened."

You scoffed and walked away from him, tired of his naivety.

"No, we won't."

Sirius chuckled and stood up from the couch, following after you.

"Hey, where you going, darling?"

"I'm not your darling!" You snapped, turning around to face him.

Rage filled your bones with the energy of your broken heart as you stared at Sirius, who only appeared perplexed, as if your reaction was unwarranted.

"I'm not your love, I'm not your girlfriend, I'm not your safety net to fall back on whenever you're bored and desperate and alone." You stepped towards him, watching as his eyes became clearer and his back straighter.

"I will never be any of those things ever again, because I don't love you anymore."

That hit something within him, Sirius appearing to become sober and shocked. And finally hurt by you. Finally he knew the feeling of rejection, of not being good enough.

"Y-you don't love me?"

You shook your head, willing away the tears building up in your eyes as Sirius' hands lifted to hold your face, but then staying in the air as if they did not know where to go anymore.

"I don't love you. Not anymore. Now that I know you're nothing special."

Perhaps that was too far, too cruel, but you wanted him to experience the same feelings you felt whenever he would complain about you to his friends, whenever he would flirt with other girls, whenever he would ignore you like you meant nothing to him.

You could see in his eyes that his would crumbled, could hear the shattering of his heart as he stumbled back.

"But you... you don't mean that." Sirius sniffed, chuckling dejectedly as he stated into your eyes. He half-expected you to laugh and say it was all a joke, or to beg for his forgiveness and hold him in your arms until the morning.

After all, he only came to your apartment for your warm and familiar embrace. An embrace that made him feel safe and loved.

"I do mean it. I've never meant anything more. I don't love you, and I want you to go."

Sirius shook his head, a tear slipping from his eye.

"No."

"Sirius, leave."

A sob broke out of him before he knelt on the ground before you and hugged your body, clinging desperately onto you as he cried.

"No, I don't want to leave, I-I..." He couldn't form words properly, sobbing with the overwhelming emotions of sadness overtook him.

"I can't leave you."

You shut your eyes, holding your head up as you fought the strong urge to sink to the floor and kiss away his tears.

"Please, Sirius. If you... if you feel anything towards me at all, please go away."

The man turned silent, his hold on your body slipping away slowly as he remained knelt on the floor.

The sight reminded you that he wasn't a saint, a god, a dreamer with the purpose of putting a little excitement into your life.

He was just a man. Nothing more. Nothing special.

Sirius stood up, his cheeks wet and his eyes red whilst he avoided looking at you.

He nodded, appearing to respect your wish as he began to walk away.

He took slow steps towards the door, leaving you frozen in place as you watched him walk away.

Before he opened the door, before he could go away for good, he turned back to you.

"I'm sorry."

Then the door opened, and shut.

And you cried.

You did not know why, perhaps it was the overwhelming emotions of relief and misery and love that made you crumble and cry, yet you did know that with every tear, every smile, every laugh and every frown; none of it would be as strong as it was with him.

-♡-

[yilingpatriarchscvnt]

One glance, eternal mistake.

Zhongli x God!Reader

Angst with no comfort, regret, mention of death, character dying, blaming someone innocent.

"maybe it would have been better if we have never met y/n."

Summary: Y/n falling in love with the god of contract, who knew it would turn out this way.

_____________________________________________

Stars of the teyvat... Yes, the fake sky and the stars. Y/n was indeed a magical creature type of god. Y/h color with a fading midnight blue to blend in with the sky, her eyes glowing like the stars that rises of up in the middle of the night. Watching all over teyvat, reporting back to the heavenly principles.

Y/n was no strong or weak god, all she could do is control over stars and look over the world. Until she fell from sky when khaenri'ah's fall started. Watching archon's destroying the innocent khaenri'ah people turning into a monster. She can't interfere, it would be illegal to the laws of teyvat and would get punishment from the upper gods.

She wake up at the mountains of liyue, Morax's territory.

Traveling around the liyue and bumping to morax accidentally, of course from her appearance morax would know she was not a ordinary mortal.

"you are not from here are you?" A cold masculine voice sent shivers down her spine. From his gaze and his stand she knew she was not a match for him.

"I came from the stars, the sky, god of contract. I watch all over the teyvat." She tried to look at him like he looked at her, trying to scare him. Well that was a dumb mistake that lent her to embarrassment.

"I see mind exchanging names, heavenly god." Who was y/n to decline that offer. Time by time they got to know each other, they made lots of friends and had fun hanging out.

All teyvat knows a heavenly god shouldn't be falling in love with someone on teyvat. Principles knows why that stupid law was there, y/n can't put up with her feeling that called 'love'. İt made her like a person who is too drunk, can't find a way to stop her day dreaming about morax. She can't keep running away from him.

She loved him so much it was hurting. Everytime she see how he looked at guizhong with those eyes, it hurt. Everytime he hold her hand it hurt. Jealousy was filled in her head but who was she to do something bad to guizhong.

The day came and y/n was ready to confess her feelings, walking to the Qingyun Peak with a foolish smile on her face.

"I'm sorry y/n but my feelings belong to guizhong." Yes, a foolish smile on her face. Which place you look you can see her face slowly turning to a sad expression. Tear in her eyes as she lowered her head accepting the truth.

They returned back to liyue harbor in silent, not saying and words to each other like they used to. Sharing a few glances but looking away quickly trying not to disturb each others presence. Or that's what morax thought, how could she be disturbed by him being next to her. That's what she needed after all.

Only after a few days, everything fell apart. Everyone turning their backs on you, you never knew why until the guizhongs death rumors came to her ears. Quickly searching for morax only to be met by his angry face towards her.

"Why are you looking at me like that morax?" That's right she doesn't know why, why did everyone suddenly turned their back on her, why did guizhong die, why morax was looking at her like he was disgusted?

"Are you really going to act like you don't know? İs that it y/n? Were you so jealous that you had to kill her?" No...no she really didn't understand what was going on.

"What are you talking about morax, I didn't do such a thing!"

"Watching over teyvat? What an absurd thing for a god. Watching over teyvat so you could spot guizhong and kill her?" Morax scoffed at the first part of his sentence, making you tear up.

"İt's not an absurd thing! İf it weren't me this world would have been nothing but a chess piece for heavenly principles! I don't use my power to kill someone morax." She ended her sentence.

"Really? So why the liyue's people are telling that they witnessed you killing guizhong?! Maybe it would have been better if we have never met y/n." The ground started to rumble as he shouted.

"I didn't do it, I am telling you! I would have already be killed by principles if I did that to a minor god!" She shouted back.

Back and forth arguing for 20 minutes led them nothing but a prison inside the cave for y/n. She did nothing wrong, it wasn't her. No creature would look exactly like her.

Days after days, weeks after week and a month. She was stuck inside that cave that morax threw her in. The rumors started to vanish like a wind. Y/n already gave up there were no stars inside the cave and she couldn't watch over teyvat. She knew she was going to be executed. Heavenly principles already planned her execution.

The false rumor reached to everyone's ear in Liyue, it wasn't y/n who killed but her another creature sent by upper gods. God of contract, morax was devastated hearing the news. He was walking to the cave where you were in really fast almost sprinting.

Only to be met by you who was already got killed, a spear pierced through your chest as you looked at him smiling for the last time. Throwing himself on to her, catching her before she fall to the ground, Holding you.

"I lied y/n, my heart and my body only belongs to you, my feelings too. I was a coward y/n, I couldn't say it that they but I really thought it was you who killed her, I was wrong. I was wrong for the first time and I am letting you die like this." He confessed.

"İt was probably principles order morax don't blame yourself" y/n said through her coughes.

"how can I not? I shouldn't have done this in first place at all. I should have trusted you, I love you so much but I couldn't trust y/n. Don't forgive someone like me."

"Morax..." Her breathing got slower.

"No...no don't- just don't die on me like this! We still have lots to do y/n, once we get back to Liyue we can spend our times together! So...please.." his voice broke at the end begging to her stay more. She caressed his cheek wiping his tears away.

"Morax, I'm getting sleepy..." Her hand fall to the ground closing her eyes and breathing his scent in for the last time.

"I understand, please sleep well my love. Dream about being on the sky and flying around the stars again my dear..." He carried her body to a high mountain that had great views at night.

He sat next to her grave watching the stars that no longer shine as bright as before. The feeling of guilt pressing down on his heart, crying like a toddler. He looked up the sky once again as he saw a shooting star.

"you must be flying freely now, you look happy."