#angel rambles 🪽
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Quotes i relate to shifting that kinda make me gag
#evangelineshifts ˖⋆࿐໋₊#angel rambles 🪽#reality shifting#shiftblr#desired reality#shifting#quantum jumping#shifting realities#law of assumption#manifestation#neville goddard#quotes#poetry#shifting reality#shifting community#hogwarts shifting#shifting to desired reality#shifting blog#shifter#shifters of tumblr#shifters#reality shifter
487 notes
·
View notes
Text
((TW:3d))
Q: “What’s your favourite hobby?”
A: scrapbooking about 3d or reading fiction mostly about 3d
Q: “What music do you like listening to?”
A: I have an 3d playlist
Q: “What’s are your likes and dislikes?”
A: I dislike having a body and I like trying to get rid of it
Q: “Who’s your best friend?”
A: my only friend is 3d (that is not a joke or exaggeration), 3d is my ‘person’
Q: “What is your favourite food?”
A: honestly don’t have one because 3d
Q: “What are your goals?”
A: only the ones from 3d
Q: “What’s your future look like?”
A: if it exists, then 3d
Q: “On a scale of 1 to 10..”
A: 3d
… sorry for any dry humour
#tw ana rant#tw ed ana#tw ana bløg#3d but not sheeren#tw ana meme#4nor3xia#ana rambles#ana angels🪽#tw an0rexia#tw ana ed#tw body dysmorphia#tw edtwt#ed reality#ed but not ed sheeran#ed rant#4norexla#4n@diary#3d rant#3d reality#tw 3d vent#3d not sheeran#3d blog#3ating d1sorder#⭐️rving#⭐️ve#⭐️ ing motivation#light as a feather#⭐️vation goals
42 notes
·
View notes
Text
Why does it have to be so hard to take care of this body
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
I see my sister at the end of this month/beginning of next month. I need to reach at least gw 2, there has to be a difference in me when I see her next. I want to be my prettiest for her.
I’m also seeing the girl I’m talking to and want to look my best for her. I want her to look at me and see that I’m pretty the way I see she’s beautiful. I want her to see that in me. I need it so bad oh god.
#4n@diary#4nor3xia#m14blr#i wanna be perfect#@na shit#ana angels🪽#i wanna be sk1nn1#⭐️vation goals#⭐️ ing motivation#⭐️rving#3d but not sheeren#3d not sheeran#soupinmypockets#tw ana bløg#i just want to be thin#tw eating issues#i hate calories#4n4blog#4n4t1ps#4n0rexic#4n4blr#4n4m1a#4n4buddy#4nerex1a#tw ana rant#ana rambles
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
Things said in my dream that I can’t really get over
Them: i don’t like your attitude!
Me: yeah? Well I don’t like your autism diagnosis
—
Me: what are those?
My friend: buffalo Chicken wings *runs off a and I chase her with a bucket of chicken*
-has to put the chicken down to chase her more efficiently-
Me: I had to put your chicken on a table
Her: awwww I wanted those
Me: well why’d you run then?!??
Her: I was scared
Me: ???!?!??
Her: they were gonna touch me *shows me the bucket of chicken that now vaguely resembles boobs*
Me: they’re just titties
Her: 😕
—
Things written on a wall by my friend
-“Like Remus puts his head in Sirius’s neck and falling by stars (?) is playing as he falls asleep” >> wolfstar propaganda-
I wish I could remember more they kinda disappeared as I woke up but crazy shit man.
#angel rambles 🪽✨#the last of us#ellie williams#bella ramsey#lgbtq#wlw#tlou#marauders era#wolfstar#remus lupin#sirius black#james potter#harry potter#text post#idk what tags to use#dream#lucid dreaming
42 notes
·
View notes
Text
sometimes I think I don’t deserve to feel pretty. maybe I do deserve to be fat because then it won’t happen again, no one would think of me as pretty and try to take me forcefully again…
#꒰ა ໒꒱ star’s diary#I literally want to die#I can’t be fat like that forever but also if I get skinny again she might do it again#sa survivor#yea yea#im just rambling#whatever#i <3 ⭐️ving !!#💡 as a feather#💡as a 🪶#🕯️ as a 🪶#🕯️as a feather#boy ana#eating leaves#⭐️ ing motivation#⭐️rving#⭐️vation goals#skin and 🦴#light as a 🍂#skin&🩻fightback#skinnnyy#skinandbones#skin&bones#sk1n4nd🦴#i wanna be sk1nn1#thigh g4p#ana angels🪽#ana loves you#ana ftm#i love ana
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
Does anykin(any otherkin) else absolutely adore watching drone videos that fly over and through different landscapes because it feels like flying? It feels like I’m flying through beautiful areas of earth without a care in the world🪽🕊️⛅️
This ones really nice🌿
#angelkin#✮; angelic ramblings#I reaaallly want to fly T-T#otherkin#alterhuman#angel wings#actually angelic#i miss my wings#winged alterhuman🪽
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
[🪽🔥]
Celestial Angel Cookie opening her eyes for once, really surprised Burning Spice Cookie. Never in his life, he seen her eyes. She usually has them closed.
“You should keep your eyes opened more often.”
“I’ll think about it my dearest.”
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
P I N N E D / N A V I G A T I O N:
hi! Im a and this is my blog :) (i dont want my full name so im just using an initial!)
I have a side blog!! its @ana-l0ves-me! its for any tips/workouts/recipes i find on here that i either want to try or find helpful! i made a side blog for that so its not too cluttered with both all of that and all the random things i post and reblog here!
D N I I F:
not an ed account, bigots in any way, accounts with no pfps/posts, etc.
W A R N I N G:
this blog WILL contain mostly eating disorder content, so if you dont want to see that shit click off now. block dont report because i really dont want to go through the effort of making a new account.
i will follow anyone back if you have a pfp picture/have similar interests or post similar things as i do.
this account is a vent space for me to safely talk about the disorder that im struggling with when i cant anywhere else.
Thank you for reading this!!! 🩷🩷
N A V I G A T I O N:
random things:
calorie log
stats
foodspo:
grosspo (my fav one rn)
thinspo:
handspo
random thinspo
random thinspo 2
t a g g i n g s y s t e m:
🫀a's blog - mostly anything
🌷 ed things - anything ed related
🩸 vent - vents/ triggering content
🪵 repost - any reblogs
🦢 original - original posts
🪽 angel - suicidal/self harm/self-destructive thoughts or rants
🐳 ramble - me just rambling about random things
❤️🩹 thinspo - any thinspo (original or reposts)
#🫀 a's blog#🌷ed things#🩸vent#🪵 repost#🦢 original#🪽angel#🐳 ramble#❤️🩹 thinspo#tw ana diary#ana trigger#ed not ed sheeran#ana meal#disordered eating thoughts#ed weightloss#tw ed diet#3ating d1sorder#i need to be weightless#i wanna lose weight#light as a 🪶#tw edtwt#ed bllog#edblrr#edtwitter#ed relapse#ed vent#ed disorder#ed not sheeren#tw restrictive ed#tw disordered eating#eating disoder trigger warning
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
This kinda stuff really needs to be socially acceptable. I feel we’re similarly ostracized just like those in lgbtq+ use to be and still are a lot of the time. I just wish I wasn’t scared to identify as myself outside of the internet =/
I’ve realised that I’ve never said “I am an Angel“ out loud. I talk a lot when I’m comfortable, yet I’ve never said to be an Angel out loud??
The little corners online are the only few little places wiling to take this seriously, there are rarely even opportunities for this irl. That’s a little sad. I’d love to be able to shake hands and be like “Hi, I’m Alexander, your wing earrings are super neat! I’m an Angel myself, you know?” Or something along the lines of it.
Same goes for my queer identities though! I think I’ve only ever said “I am Trans” out loud like five times, “I am Nonbinary” maybe even like three times in my life.
It just shows how much of an social awkwardness is bound to some parts of identity still. We should be able to feel more safe in our surroundings ffs
50 notes
·
View notes
Text
My main motivation to shift rn is that I crave physical contact like some sort of stray cat.
#evangelineshifts ˖⋆࿐໋₊#angel rambles 🪽#reality shifting#shiftblr#desired reality#shifting#quantum jumping#shifting realities#shifters#shifter#shifting reality#shifting to desired reality#hogwarts shifting#shifting blog#harry potter shifting#shifting to marauders era#shifttok#shifting community
473 notes
·
View notes
Text
“Hi Ana, are you there for me?”
“Yes I’m here.”
#ana rambles#tw edtwt#tw ana bløg#tw bones#tw ana rant#tw ed ana#anadiet#ed but not ed sheeran#ed reality#4nor3xia#ana angels🪽#4norexla#3d but not sheeren#4n4rexia#4n0rexic#4nerex1a#tw an0rexia#tw ana meme#tw 3d vent#3d not sheeran#⭐️rving#⭐️ve#⭐️ ing motivation#⭐️vation goals#light as a feather#bonespø
43 notes
·
View notes
Text
I need a way to refer to my body when I'm having more angelic days, but vessel sounds so harsh and cold...like it's just a specimen rather than a gift that I'm talking care of :(
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
The mother, the daughter, and the saving Grace
(I’m onto something here walk with me)
#Abby miller#kiernan shipka#mckenna grace#Bridget Jensen#Bridget Jensen home before dark#home before dark#sabrina spellman#chilling adventures of sabrina#Paige Swanson#Paige young Sheldon#young sheldon#angel rambles 🪽✨
41 notes
·
View notes
Text
So I've recently been getting into oddities, I got two little butterfly wings and a bone in little jars to start my collection and one of my teeth, weird I know, but i had depression growing up , didn't care for my teeth and dental care is fucking expensive so when one of my teeth inevitably fell out (and I had finished crying) I saved It and cleaned it and it now lives on my shelf. But this made me think about the cod characters and their little goth gf
Price🥃- price is honestly such a daddy let's be honest, I genuinely think he'd not be too fazed due to his line of work, its not like he's not seen bones before, but he'd maybe be a teeny bit concerned about his little ones fascination with death, 'yes dove the little butterfly is beautiful but also why do you want to taxidermy the cat when it eventually dies?', he's so used to death but his little angel is so pure in his eyes so he worries from time to time but ultimately it makes her happy so he supposes it's not a bad thing. I do think he'd let her have her own space in the house for them , probably build her custom shelves for them himself. his angel doesn't gotta worry about anything just gotta sit on his lap whilst he sips his whiskey listening to her ramblings all about the different ones she wants to collect.
Gaz 🪽- Gaz is honestly an angel (a sexy, charming, beautiful little angel) he'd probably have known his love a long time, maybe gone to school with her or something along those lines so I don't think he'd be grossed out by these things, I think he'd just except his lover is a little weird but he knew that from the beginning, that's how they became friends never mind lovers. I do think he'd go with his girl to all the little gothic shops and fairs, 'yeah love that one's good, can we get a frog? I think this one looks cool'. He wouldn't be obsessed with it like his love but he wouldn't mind it, I think he'd just be neutral about it, I do also think he'd get her custom ones for valentine's day, like how people have those mice in different situations and outfits, he'd get her one holding her favourite dried flowers and an engraved wooden base with their anniversary on.
Soap 🧼- I love this big baby but he'd be so fucking whiny about it, 'hen wha the fuck is tha?..I can see it's bones!'. He'd definitely tell the team and absolutely would make jokes about it but he's mad for his little bonnie so this ain't gonna make him quit his love for her , fuck no. I think he'd go to antique shops with his lass but absolutely would complain about how he feels watched from all the beady little eyes on him, and please if she names any of her little creatures he'd take the mick 'aye! Stop naming m like their our wee kids!'.
Alejandro 🫀- honestly I think Alejandro wouldn't mind, his amor has his heart, you want the house to look like Halloween all year round so be it . his abuela taught him to respect the dead so I think he'd talk in his head to the little creatures, he has to move one to get something of the shelf, 'lo siento amiguito' (sorry little friend) , god forbid he breaks a jar ones in, not only would he be so apologetic to his little luna (moon) but to the little creature he disturbed, he'd fix it himself within an hour and get them a better jar, i think he'd even leave his favourite creatures offerings during the day of the dead.
Farah🌛- I think Farah would be Hiding her relationship with her sol ( sun) , her girl is so soft and bubbly but has this dark little look to her, but because of her culture and high risk job Farah keeps the relationship private to protect her girl. But I think there'd be signs, she'd buy her Bella (beautiful) matching taxidermy jewelry, I think some kind of bones or teeth, she loves her girl so much, she wants to show she cares by wearing her weird little interest.
Roach🪳- he'd absolutely scavenge his butterfly trinkets, I'm talking mudlarking, I'm talking on missions sees an old coin in a lake, his now, he's so sneaky and quick, the team are absolutely so confused why his pockets are so heavy and jingle as he walks but it all makes sense when they eventually meet his love at their house and it's covered in small little trinkets and also he absolutely buys her a pinned roach.
Horangi 🍻- I fully believe his sweetheart is a curvy girl, and he's obsessed, he buys her lingerie with spiderwebs in the mesh and makes her model it, loves seeing the way her body curves and moves as she walks, and he wears matching rings with her.
Now onto the guys that made my little vampire heart go wild with this idea
Konig 🌩️- firm believer that konig sees her one day and is just obsessed immediately, I think he'd live more rural in the mountains and would bring little trinkets he finds, almost worshiping his spatz (sparrow) like how people worship different god's by leaving offerings. I think he'd hunt his food often so he'd give schatz the bones and fur, he'd clean them too and would use the fur to make her things to add to her collection, anything to show he can provide for her. I think she'd be the small towns little witch, at least that's what people say, I think she's just a regular girl who loves cottages and creepy stuff but small villages talk, and konig is hooked immediately.
Keegan 🦷- Keegan isn't bothered, he'll he'd make it you, go into the woods and hunt for bones and dead bugs to preserve for you. I think he'd go to all the fairs and shops and I think he'd even get some himself for the animals he likes, not many but I definitely think he'd have a crow or something. my first thought with Keegan is on their anniversary he'd order his darling blood jewelry made from his own blood, I don't think he'd even think to much into it, the price doesn't matter and blood doesn't bother him, anything for his woman.
Ghost 💀- we all know that ghost is closed off and doesn't love easily so you can imagine when he does love he falls hard, in walks in this little thing and he's fucking hooked. He doesn't care how morally wrong it is, she's his, the second he sees her, just a little thing, he's gotta protect her, provide for her. Some how he worms his way into her life (definitely a meer coincidence and I'm sure no stalking involved at all) and he's not going no where. I think he'd buy her anything she wanted, he doesn't care about the price and I think he'd have some... unethical ways to get her certain oddities let's say, he kills an enemy and notices he has a prosthetic eye or something , well his little bunny would love that for her shelf, he can clean bones no problem, and if she asks where he got a human skull because they're so expensive and rare well 'got em from an antique shop' thats all she needs to know.
#cod x reader#task force 141#konig cod#konig x reader#john soap mactavish#soap cod#soap x reader#ghost simon riley#ghost x reader#ghost cod#john price#price x reader#price cod#alejandro vargas#alejandro cod#farah cod#keegan p russ#cod keegan#cod#cod characters x their little goth gf
103 notes
·
View notes
Text
Just Pretend-twelve
*gif created by me. feel free to use, simply give credit*
Parings: Noah Sebastian x Musician! Reader
Warnings/Tropes: language, angst, fluff, smut, star-crossed lovers, right person/wrong time, cheating, talks of mental abuse.
Summary: “I can wait for years, heaven knows I’m not getting over you.” A story about two star-crossed lovers, that always find their way back because their souls are entwined. The universe desperately attempts to bring them together, no matter what the cost.
Authors Note: All I will say is enjoy my loves.
Tags: @ozwriterchick @waake-meee-up @notingridslurkaccount @niicoleleigh @sammyjoeee @xxrainstorm @dominuslunae @notmaddihealy @malice-ov-mercy @crimson-calligraphyx @iknownothingpeople @writethrough @thebadchic @blackveilomens Claudia on Tumblr @tobe-written @blacksoul-27 @loeytuan98 @loverofagoodbeard @comfortcharactercraze @lma1986 @plutonikchaos1 @spicywhenspeaking @lyschko666 @somewhere-diamond @hi-fancy-seeing-you-here @koskeepsake @bngurngheart
NOAH
“You wanna take, take, take. You wanna break, break, break my heart,” I rambled while pacing my room.
Fuck, do I need to add break that many times?
I rambled the sentence a few more times to see how it tasted on my tongue.
Fuck it, I shrugged. It’s good.
My fingers drummed a beat against thigh as I continued to pace the room, anything to keep my mind off of my fucking phone. “But now I know my place.”
Hi.
Who the hell says hi?
It’s been 4 minutes and 35 seconds. No-wait-4 minutes and 53 since I texted Y/N. She’ll probably leave me on read. Especially after how I was acting the last few weeks. There wasn’t a doubt in my mind that one of the guys told her how I’d been drinking. Why would she want another Trey? There’s no way she’d respond. Maybe this friendship is over, even despite our feelings. Despite everything maybe it was a lost cause.
“Fuck, I need to get the verse down,” I tossed my phone onto my bed and sang the verse once again.
“You couldn’t wait, wait, wait. For the day, day, day I lost. It’s such a shame, shame, shame you couldn’t change, look what it cost.”
Why the hell did I add day that many times? You know what? I think it works but I’ll ask Jolly what he thinks. As I stood from bed, I scratched at my stomach, my shirt riding up just the slightest and I couldn’t help but think of the reason Y/N gave me my nickname.
“Because you’re the sweetest and your stomach is soft.”
“Idiot,” I grumbled while clipping my hair back away from my face.
I could use a trim.
With a sigh, I took two steps, ready to leave my phone behind on my bed, until his rang loudly and I whipped my head back so fast. My hands shook at my sides, not reaching for it yet, afraid that I might have misheard the notification. But when my phone went off another time, I nearly jumped onto my bed to grab it.
Your Amazon package is out for delivery!
Just as I was about to chuck my phone across the wall, something told me to check the message thread with Y/N one more time.
My message was the last one sent but my heart fell slightly when I saw three bubbles appear.
“Oh shit,” I muttered almost dropping my phone but kept the grip on it firm.
The bubbles disappeared only to appear a few seconds later just to disappear for a few moments too long.
The entire time, I sat on the edge of my bed as my knee bounced in a rapid pace, just as my heart did while I waited to see if she would respond.
Angel 🪽: Hi mochi.
I jumped to my feet, a loud thud echoing from how hard the force was, and I bounced on my heels trying to think of what to say.
Hey, how are you?
Nice, something short and simple. Don’t want to push her too far.
I wasn’t sure what to say, not really. I just knew I wanted her back in my life regardless of how things went. It killed me not to have even the slightest of contact. The first step is this.
Angel 🪽: can we FaceTime? only if you’re comfortable with that. There are some things I need to say and it would be better to face to face than texting.
“Fuck,” I began pacing the length of my bedroom once again, panic setting in low in my stomach. Texting her was one thing but to see her face again made my skin itch and skin tingle in the best way.
But she hurt you.
I sighed at the voice in my mind, knowing it was true, but right now it didn’t matter. We were ready to move past what happened.
Sure.
Seconds later, my phone rang, the trill of it a constant buzzing and I hesitated to answer. But I knew I had too. I was the one that set out the end of the olive branch and she was reaching for it, begging me to pull her back.
Giving myself a quick once over in the mirror of my closets, I smoothed down my hair and wiped at the imaginary dirt on my face before I clicked the green button and soon her face appeared on my screen.
Fuck, she looked ragged. The sunken eyes, the bruised smile but shit, she still looked so beautiful. With the true state I’d been in, I knew I probably didn’t look better.
“Hi,” her voice was rough but angelic.
I noticed my door was open so once that was shut, I sat down at my computer chair, leaning back slightly.
“Hey.”
“How have you been?”
My chair rocked back and forth. “Good, how about you?”
There was a long beat of silence, and I used that time to look at her surroundings. There was a large window behind her with the setting sun casting an orange glow around her.
A true fucking angel.
“Good,” she said after a long breath. “You know what, lets cut the bullshit.”
I blinked, perplexed where this conversation was headed now.
“Angel-,” I began.
But her stern eyes stared back at me when she shook her head. “No, mochi, I need to say this. Please let me say this.”
I took a deep breath, ignoring the way my heart skipped a beat when she said my nickname, and urged her on with a nod.
Her mouth moved like a fish out of water, trying to gather her words. “I hurt you. I hurt you and I’m so fucking sorry, Noah.”
I stared at her and to be honest; I wasn’t expecting that. I wasn't sure who would apologize first then I remembered I didn’t need to apologize. I wasn’t the one who left.
“It’s-.”
“No,” she cut me off. “Let me finish. I’m truly sorry. I had no right to just up and leave with no explanation.”
She abruptly stood and walked across her room before sitting on her bed now, a furry animal curled up on the pillow next to her.
Salem.
“There are so many things haunting me, Noah. As I’m sure there are things haunting you and I’m just-I’m sorry.”
I wanted to say something, anything, but I sat frozen holding the phone in front of my face while I perched my other arm behind my head. There were so many thoughts weighing heavy on my mind until finally I started small.
“I-I appreciate your apology.”
I wanted to deep deeper into this; I wanted to continue to dig and dig and dig under her skin and brain because I wanted to know more but she was holding back.
She brought Salem into her lap then set up her phone that I could see her entire body and the cat on her lap. Y/N looked beautiful in a simple hoodie and sweatpants, her hair in a disarrayed bun, strands falling into her face but didn’t care enough to brush away.
Noise outside my door took my attention away from my phone for a few seconds as I sat up straighter in my chair, eyes narrowing towards the door.
“I don’t want to ruin our friendship.”
My eyes snapped back to my phone at that word; friendship.
We already established there's nothing more than being friends. It doesn’t make much sense with what we’d been through but right now, I’d take what I can get.
“I don’t want to, either,” I admitted with a sigh. “These last few weeks have been pretty rough for me and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss you, angel.”
The corner of her mouth lifted. “I missed you too, mochi. So we can both agree, fresh start?”
“I’d like that,” I smiled. “Salem?”
She beamed while holding up the cat so he could extended his body straight like a stick. “Yep. He’s settled into the move right away. You should see Malcolm with him. At first, Malcolm wouldn’t even be in the same room together but now, I catch him stealing Salem from my room so he could cuddle him.”
I chuckled at the vision of large Malcolm snuggling with a small cat on the couch.
“What about you? How are you enjoying living in Los Angeles?”
“I haven’t got out much because of the pandemic but now that the ban is lifted, I want to find an art studio or a gym. Something to get my ass out of the house.”
“You should come with me to my gym,” the words rushed out before I could stop myself. “I’ve been trying to get one of the guys to come with but they won’t.”
She raised a hesitant brow. “Are you sure? I don’t want to interject myself in something thats yours.”
“Angel, I promise you its fine.” I assured her.
“Alright, fuck it. I’m in,” she smiled. “I want to learn some taekwondo.”
I hummed. “Lucky for you, the place I go offers some great classes on Tuesdays and Fridays, we can go this week?”
It was already Wednesday so it would be a few days before we rushed into this.
“I’d like that, Noah. Thank you.”
“Y/N, the pharmacy called me because you didn’t answer. Your meds are ready for pickup.”
Chase appeared behind Y/N in the screen and when he saw me, he cursed. “Fuck, I didn’t know you were on the phone. Sup, Noah.”
I nodded. “Hey man.”
Y/N waved Chase off. “It’s fine. We can pick them up after dinner.”
“Meds? Everything alright?” I asked with slight worry.
I fully expected her to brush me off or change the subject.
“Remember when I told you that night that I deal with something every month and it’s a lot?”
I tried not to remember the aftermath of us having sex.
“Yeah,” I said.
“Well, I have to take different meds to help with it. It’s a lot to go into right now but I promise, one day.”
“Whenever you’re ready, angel,” I said with a smile, not wanting to feel like she needed to be forced to tell me what was wrong with her.
“What the fuck? I’m starving and you two are chit chatting like teenage girls who just found out the schools hot gossip.”
Malcolm appeared on screen behind Y/N and threw up the two fingered peace sign. “Sorry, Noah. We’re taking her away from you.”
I chuckled. “All good. We can talk tomorrow? I can call around 2:30?”
Y/N smiled that bright smile that pulled at the strings of my heart; the one that connected us. “I’d like that, mochi.”
With one final goodbye, I hit the red button, ending the call with a sigh. It was only a few minute long conversation but enough to ease the worry if everything would be alright.
“Shit.”
“Get your foot off of my knee, you dumbass.”
“Did they hang up? I can’t hear anything?”
What the fuck?
JOLLY
“We shouldn’t eavesdrop. It’s not our place,” I said with my hands deep in my pockets.
“Dude, were not listening to him fuck her. They’re talking since they fucked,” Orie pointed to Noah’s closed door.
“Real classy, dickhead,” Jesse smacked the back of Orie’s head.
“I’m just saying,” he raised his hands in defense. “I want to hear! Now move.”
Jesse kneeled in front of Noah’s door with Orie leaning over him, and Michale standing behind Orie.
“Why are they talking about taekwando?” Jesse wondered.
“Shut the fuck up, Jesse I can’t hear,” Michael slapped his arm.
I shook my head before temptation gave in and I kneeled next to Jesse so I could get a better listen. This was the first time Y/N and Noah would talk since that night and since there wasn’t any raised voices, I could only hope it was a civil conversation.
“Move your hair it’s in my face,” Jesse tried to push me away.
“Not my fault you’re a dwarf, man,” I shrugged then hushed him.
“I’d like that, Noah. Thank you.”
The small glimmer of hope that things would be okay intensified when I heard the softness of Y/N’s voice. I could almost imagine that eye crinkling smile she would do; the one Noah loved.
“If Noah knows we’re listening, he won’t turn the heat on for a week,” Michael reminded us.
“Shit,” Jesse cursed.
Orie pushed Michale away. “Get your foot off of my knee, you dumbass.”
“Did they hang up? I can’t hear anything?”
Suddenly, the door opened behind us but I was the only saved from falling to the floor at Noah’s feet that was covered with his favorite pair of Naurato socks; Jesse, Orie, and Michael all falling on top of each other in a heap.
“What the fuck?” Noah cursed with hands on his hips. “Were you guys listening to my conversation?”
The three of them scrambled to their feet before running down the stairs, their laughter echoing through our shared home. I watched with a small smile and shook my head before Noah glared over to me.
“Fuck you, you know what? No heat. I’m serious! Kiss my ass.” He called out after them. “It’s going to be 65 degrees all week!”
“Wasn’t my idea,” I defended with my hands held up.
Groans carried upstairs as soon as Noah turned off the heat. “Oh, come on, Noah!”
“What the fuck, man!”
A sly smirk played at his lips. “We got stock in Bad Omens hoodies; fucking wear one and don’t listen to my phone calls.”
Once Noah retreated into his room, I stared at the closed door with a proud smile. It was a drastic change in attitude from how he was just last week. Talking to Y/N brought out the playful, joking side of Noah that we all love and missed.
Maybe things were going to be alright.
“So who’s going up there to ask how it went,” Orie’s voice called out from downstairs.
NOAH
The soft, delicate, knock against my bedroom door made me take off my headphones, setting them down on my desk. Exiting out of my game and making sure TWITCH was closed out, I rose from my seat and ran a hand through my hair before I opened the door, heart falling into my stomach at the sight in front of me.
Y/N was wringing her nervous hands together, her bottom lip caught between her teeth.
“Angel? What are you doing here?” I questioned while leaning an arm against the door.
“Uh, Jesse let me in. I-I needed to see you,” she hugged the jacket closer to her chest, something clearly bothering her.
My brows scrunched together, still shocked that she was standing in front of me. Just a few hours ago, we were talking on FaceTime about our gym meet up tomorrow and she said she needed to hang up because Chase and her had plans to go hiking.
“Everything alright?”
She hesitated eyes darting to my bedroom. “I need your help, Noah.”
My heart jumped into my throat as I stood straighter, unsure if I heard her correctly. “With what? Is something broken?”
“No, Noah,” Y/N’s voice dropped low before taking a step towards me, hands trailing down my chest. “I need you.”
Oh, fuck.
The passionate, high energy, tension that we feared was lost came flooding back into our veins as I yanked Y/N into the room, kicking the door shut behind her. I wrapped my hand behind her head and sparks shot through my entire existence when I pressed my lips against Y/N’s in a soul shattering, earth ending kiss. My tongue pushed past her lips almost instantly, finding hers in a fight for dominance. It explored every inch of her mouth and she moaned, nails scratching at the fabric of my shirt. With one hand wrapped around the back of her neck, the other slipped underneath her shit to graze over the soft skin of her stomach.
“Noah,” she breathed against my lips.
“Fuck, I missed you angel,” I walked her backwards towards my bed.
Her lips were swollen, lipstick smeared from the force of our kiss, and I felt all the heat rush straight to my cock when I thought of those lips stretched around me, drool leaking out of the corners of her mouth and trickling down her chin as she struggled to take all of me in.
My dick ached in pain, needing some sends of release; soon.
I helped her out of her clothes; her doing the same to me, as our lips met again. My teeth bitting down on her bottom one as she tried to pull away.
She hissed while dabbing a finger to her face. “Did-did you just bite me?”
I took in the sight of her standing in front of me in a simple black matching bra and panties set.
“Fuck, you’re going to kill me,” I hooked a finger into the strap of her bra, sliding it down over her shoulder.
The tattoo’s that littered her skin almost glowed from the neon lights in my room. Kaonashi on her arm, the large array if flowers and veins on the other arm, the one of all the Greek Gods on Mt. Olympus on her thigh, and the small design of Totoro on her ankle, the ones we got on her birthday. Aogaeru from Spirited Away on my ankle.
Turning her towards my bed, I trailed my fingers down her back to unhook her bra, letting it fall down to the floor at our feet. My lips littered soft kisses along the large snake and flower tattoo on her back as I dropped to my knees, slipping off her panties to her ankles.
“Fucking beautiful,” I praised while looking up at her.
Y/N peered down at me over her shoulder. “I could get used to you being on your knees for me.”
I turned her back to face me and left my hands on her hips. “I’ll pray to this body every night if that means you stay with me, angel.”
Her hand raked through the long locks of my hair and I let myself relax into her touch as I stared at her warm core right in front of me. The phantom taste from the last time I tasted her still lingered on my tongue.
“Noah?”
I hummed while peering up through my lashes at her.
“Stand up.”
Doing what she said, I stood to my feet and now towered over her by atleast a foot. Her nails scratched down my bare chest and I hissed in pure ecstasy. The pain making me realize this was real. She was in front of me.
I attacked her lips once again as her fingers trailed down over my stomach to the waistband of my briefs, helping me step out of them. Y/N’s eyes flashed down to my hard cock as it sprang free, beads of pre-cum spilling from the slit. I rubbed my thumb over it and groaned at how sensitive I was.
“I missed you,” Y/N pressed a kiss to the pulse point of my throat; the apple.
My head titled back to give her more access, and I gripped her hips tighter.
“Sit down,” she nodded to the edge of my bed.
Once seated, Y/N kneeled down on the floor between my legs and I shivered under her touch again as her nails raked up and down my thighs. I watched her actions from the mirror behind her, eyes drinking in the sight of her large back tattoo and the perkiness of her round ass. My cock twitched in front of her face as she gazed up at me, taking her bottom lip between her teeth.
“I’ve dreamed of the way you tasted, Noah.”
My fingers grazed over her chin, up her jaw, to the back of her head and tangled within the waves of her hair. My other hand gripped my cock as I guided the tip towards her lips.
“Open those pretty lips for me, angel.”
A guteral groan sounded from the back of my throat and I titled my head up towards the ceiling, my long hair cascading down my back. I gripped Y/N’s head with a vise grip and guided her up and down; slowly at first until I reached the resistance of the back of her throat and buried my cock deep in there.
“Shit,” I breathed when she choked on me. “Feels so good.”
I kept her there for a few more seconds before letting the grip on her head ease enough that she could start moving once again. She flattened her tongue to press underneath my shaft and when her fingers cupped my tight balls; I knew I was nearing the edge of bliss. The bottom of my spine tingled with a burning that only she could bring but not yet; I didn’t want this to be over yet.
She pulled off of my cock with a loud pop as I lifted her from the ground to kneel on my bed. I pressed my large hand over her bed so I could push her upper half down on the bed while keeping her ass up in the air. I positioned us so we could face the mirror and I trailed a finger down her spine.
“Spread your legs for me,” I ordered before laying a firm smack to her ass.
Y/N writhed with a moan but did as I asked. I guided the head of my throbbing cock up and down the wetness of her folds.
“Noah,” she whined. “Please.”
“You like that, angel?” I asked.
She moans her response, but I didn’t like that answer. With my cock poised at her entrance, I leaned over her back so my warm breath fanned over the crook of her neck.
“Use your words.”
“Yes, I like it,” she answered breathlessly.
“Good girl,” I praised before slipping into her tightness; finally.
We shared a long moan, the feeling of being connected once again being almost too much for me to take, my cock pulsating inside of her. The warmth spread over every inch of pricked skin, the sensation clawing at my insides; in the best way possible. It felt like how it did that night only better because she wasn’t going anywhere. I’d make sure she’d stay tonight.
“I’m so tense, Noah,” she writhed underneath me.
I lazily kissed her back as my hips rutted up against her. “You came back.”
I pushed her face into the mattress because of my weight on her back so she could only speak.
“Always.”
My hair spread over her back when I pressed my forehead in-between her shoulders, the sweat from her skin tasting bittersweet on my tongue. I sunk my teeth deep into her, marking her as my own and pulled my cock almost all the way out, just leaving the tip.
“Mine?”
Her answer was a mess of curses when my fingers pressed into her clit, drawing fast circles. His pussy clenched over my cock as she came undone, her arousal spreading down my thighs. I hooked my fingers in her mouth to hold her up so she could watch us in the mirror now.
“Watch as I fuck your pretty pussy,” I ordered, long hair covering my face.
Y/N did the best she could to nod with my hooks in her mouth and my pace became relentless, slamming into her so hard and fast, the noises echoed throughout my room. The burning felt warm at the base of my spine as my heart pounding widly in my chest, my own orgasm so fucking close to destroying me. She looked fucking angelic from her reflection in the mirror. Her skin soaked in the neon glows of the lights of my bedroom and I wondered if anyone could hear us through the white noise of our moans and skin slapping.
My name sounded muffled from her throat since I still had my fingers hooked inside her mouth.
“What?” I unhooked my fingers.
Y/N swallowed thickly. “I want you to fuck me against the mirror.”
Anything for you, angel.
With an arm around her stomach, I lifted her off of the bed and walked over to my mirror closet, pressing her back to it. I hooked her leg over my hip then slid deep within her walls once again, my head falling to her chest with this new angle.
“Fuck,” my teeth graze over the perky buds of her nipples, swirling my tongue over them.
“Harder,” she begged, running her hands through my hair.
She gathered it at the ends and pulled my head back to crash her lips to mine and with a few hard slams of my cock into her, Y/N came apart once again for me, screaming her release into my mouth. My back tensed as my stomach muscles contracted, and with the force of my thrusts, the closet doors shook, one of them breaking off the rolling hinge and shattering the glass directly in the middle.
“Shit,” Y/N giggled.
I paid no mind to the broken glass as I buried myself deep within her, orgasm so close to cresting over me in waves.
“Cum for me, Noah,” she nipped and sucked at the tattoo across my neck again.
Her name fell from my lips repeatedly, cock thrusting into her with every utter of it.
“I love you, Noah.”
“Noah.”
“Noah, wake-.”
“NOAH! Wake up!”
My eyes bolted open as my chest heaved with every deep breath, heart pulsating to an uneven rhythm. Sweat covered every inch of my skin as I peered down at my body, dick standing straight up underneath the sheer fabric of my blanket.
It was a dream?
Fuck, I sighed while running a hand over my face before staring directly into the eyes of the person who wasn’t in my dreams two seconds ago.
Jesse took a bite out of an apple and nodded down towards me. “I hate to ruin whatever you have going on, but it’s time to get up.”
I rubbed my eyes in exhaustion and continued to heave, trying to ease my racing heart. Fick, that felt so real I was sure I was going cum.
“Must have been some dream, you were really enjoying that,” he chuckled before taking another large bite out of his apple.
I chucked my pillow at him. “I fucking hate you.”
“No, you don’t. Now hurry the fuck up, your oatmeal is getting cold.” He chuckled. “Although, maybe you need a cool down. Take a cold shower first.”
“Fuck off,” I tossed another pillow at him.
Thirty minutes and a very ice-cold shower later, I trekked down the stairs into the kitchen where three smug smiles stared at me.
“Oh, you’re finally awake!” Orie gave me a teasing smirk.
“Yeah, he was a little occupied,” Jesse laughs.
I knocked the apple out of his hands; it clattering to the kitchen counter.
“With what now?” Jolly questioned with a mock curiosity.
“Noah had a wet dream,” Jesse informed everyone.
“Shut the fuck up,” I said through gritted teeth. “Why are you guys always in my business?”
They all share a laugh before Jolly’s calming voice brought a sense of sincerity to the conversation. “It’s not a big deal, Noah. Was it- was it about Y/N?”
I did my best to hide the way my face reddened by sticking my head in the fridge to grab the milk.
“Oh, fuck. Angel. So good.” Jesse mocked in a voice that sounded nothing like me.
“Laugh it up,” I grumbled while slamming the fridge shut, suddenly not hungry anymore.
“It’s not a big deal, Noah, considering you see her today. Are you feeling okay?” Jolly wondered.
I shrugged while stuffing my hands into my gym shorts. “Yeah why wouldn’t I?”
“Well, just becau-.”
“Look I appreciate you guys, really. And I love you for helping me. I just-I want to try to atleast get back to being friends with her. I want to move past this awkward bullshit and have her in my life again. I can’t care about the details right now.”
“We know,” Orie nodded. “We want to make sure you two are going slow this time.”
“I know, I know. We’re meeting at the gym today, be nice to just hang out and do something-healthy. Talk.” I smiled with excitement and nerves.
Jolly smile while standing to his feet. “Good, I’m glad you two are talking again. Still want to write tonight?
I nodded. “Yeah, I’ve got another track we can start.”
NOAH
Inside the gym, two minutes before our meet time, I waited by sitting in a chair my leg bounced up and down, up and down- I paced that gym floor, burnt rubber almost gave the room a scent. I was finally seeing her again, since that night. Not on the phone, not waiting for a text. Physical and beautiful form. She had come back into my life like a sudden flame, blazing and streaming into my heart. I stayed up all night contemplating the certain agony I knew would be mine if I were to lose her twice.
Movement out of the corner of my eye made me turn towards the direction of the door, her angelic form stepping into my line of sight. Immediately, thoughts of my dream earlier came flooding back, and I shifted on my feet, hoping my cock would get the memo not to get hard.
Not right now.
All the breath got knocked out of me when her bright eyes landed on me and I gave her a small, awkward wave. When I saw her last on FaceTime yesterday, her skin still looked sunken in and pale, but now she looked like all the life had been breathed back into her.
“Hi,” she smiled.
“Hey.”
“Sorry I’m late. Chase dropped me off so I only have an hour before he picks me up. Something about him and Malcolm having tickets to a movie tonight.”
I waved her off. “You’re fine, angel. I could always give you a ride back home if you need.”
She thought about it, I could tell the way her pupils dilated.
“That’s sweet of you, Noah. But Chase promised he’d buy me Greek for dinner tonight before dropping me off to my art class,” she shrugged playfully.
I wasn’t sure if that was the truth or just an excuse not to spend more alone time together. Even if our conversation was flowing, there was still that awkward tension because of the elephant in the room; the one neither of us wanted to discuss. We wanted to move past what happened, start fresh.
“Art class?”
“Yeah,” she beamed. “I’m taking some painting lessons. Just another thing I started post pandemic.”
“That’s great, angel. I’d love to see what you create,” I said.
We were silents for a few long beats, just gazing at each other, and feeling the sudden thick tension, I motioned towards the equipment behind me.
“Is there something specific you want to get started on?”
“I usually like to warm up on the treadmill,” Y/N said while adjusting the strap of her gym bag.
We walked over to a more quiet area of the gym, neither of us wanting to be noticed, and as I set my things down on an open bench, I tossed off my sweater, being left in a cut off t-shirt and black shorts, and when I noticed Y/N was still wearing her heavy sweater, I raised a brow.
“Aren’t you going to get hot in that?”
She shrugged while playing with the zipper. “I’ll be fine.”
“Angel,” I took a step towards her. “Take it off. It’s hot in here already. Don’t feel like you have to hide yourself, especially from me. Remember that?”
Considering I’ve seen it all already.
Ignoring the voice in my head, I watched as Y/N eventually nodded and shed off the extra layer, now standing in front of me in tight leggings that hugged her ass perfectly and a sports bra, showing off the toned stomach I wanted to graze my tongue over.
Focus, Noah.
For the next hour, we spent time on our own choices of machines but still within range of sight. Since we were here later on in the evening, the gym wasn't that crowded. Every so often, our gazes would find each other from across the area we were working out in; me on the weight machine, her at the treadmills. It was that invisible string that tethered our hearts together, always wanting to make sure that we never strayed to far from each other.
Now, we stood packing up our things and Y/N hissed as she tried to rub out a sore spot in her back, one she couldn’t reach.
“Mochi, do you mind helping stretching me out?”
Fuck. Me.
The nickname did wonders on my already racing heart.
“Uh, yea. Sure.”
My fingers gripped her hips as she twisted and turned, before bending over to touch her toes while one hand began rubbing out the tense knots in her back.
“Oh, thank you, Noah. I’ve been so tense back there lately.”
“I’m so tense, Noah,” she writhed underneath me.
Images of her underneath me, cock slamming into her, made my cock twitch with the need to be touched. And with how close Y/N was to me as she stood straight, I knew if she took the slightest step back, my cock would brush against her ass.
Fuck, this wasn’t going to be easy.
NOAH
I all but busted through the front door, gripping my gym bag so tight my knuckles had gone white. Shortly after helping stretch out Y/N, Chase arrived to pick her up. We decided we would meet every Friday around 1o am for the taekwando classes. Ever since my dream this morning and now what happened at the gym, my cock was throbbing almost in pain, begging for release.
“How did your workout go?”
“Went great,” I tossed towards Jesse who sat with Harper in his lap on the couch.
“Just great? I mean that’s it?”
With a sigh, I stopped halfway up the stairs. “Yeah we talked, we- we’re good. I’m gonna take a shower and I’ll be down soon.”
Finally in the solitude of the bathroom, I stared at myself in the mirror. Sweat covered every inch of me again and I tensed, my whole face red and contorted. Y/N in that outfit haunted my mind since the second I saw her. I see the way she moved during her workout, her panting, the sweat dripping off her skin.
Then thoughts of our night together overtook me and I gripped the bathroom counter to steady myself. It was impossibly hard to forget.
“Fuck,” I groaned feeling the blood rushing to every organ in my body.
I turned the shower on, letting the steam gather and levitate around the room.
Hades doesn't have shit on me.
The steam almost makes me glow as I continued to stand there, staring at myself in the mirror for a few more seconds before stripping out of my gym clothes, leaving them in a heap on the floor.
My body was wet, soaked from the steam and sweat alone, as my chest heaved with every deep breath I took. Flashes of Y/N still overtaking my mind. Once finally under the spray of the water, I couldn’t take it anymore; my cock couldn't take it anymore. It was thick, red, and angry from the prolonged release and I brushed my thumb over the head, smearing the pre-cum from tip to base. With one hand on the wall and the other wrapped tightly around my cock, I stroked myself fast, not wanting to drag this out any longer.
“I miss the way you say my name, angel,” I panted.
I hear her say my name over and over. Memories flash from the beginning, her smile, her body, the way she was mounted on top of me. Oh gods, I see it and her mouth in an O shape as she came undone on my cock; in the dream and real life.
My head tilted back towards the water and I had to open my mouth, letting the water deep throat me, to muffle my sounds. The noises, the voice that was her in my head. It was so hard to just pretend what it’s like when I tasted the real thing before.
“God, I want to fuck you again. So bad.”
My deep, guttural groan echoed through the confines of the bathroom as my hips stilled, my release finally spilling into my hand.
NOAH
I sat on the edge of my bed, towel wrapped loosely around my hips, and the pen scratching widely on the paper in my lap. My head snapped up to the mirror in front of me, hair soaked with the water from my shower as droplets fell onto the pages in my lap and smearing some of the ink. But I didn’t care; I would always remember these words.
The perfect mirror. The one that didn’t have a crack running along it; reminding me that earlier today was a dream. I laughed a breathy laugh, grinning ear to ear while shaking my head. I fell into deep thought. Maybe I was in delirium, could have been the orgasm, could have been seeing Y/N again. Most likely both.
“Loves the death of peace of mind,” I muttered and proceeded writing the chorus of what I knew was true.
“You’re in the walls that I made with crosses and frames hanging upside down. For granted, in vain, I took everything I ever cared about.”
Shit, this was good.
Quickly standing to my feet, I threw on some clothes but before I left the room; I snapped a few selfies, then snatched the pad of paper to run down the stairs.
“Where’s the fire?” Nicholas chuckled.
Thankfully, everyone I needed was already in the living room; Jolly, Nicholas, and Folio.
I tossed the pad of paper on the table in front of them. “New song.”
The three shared a look before they leaned forward to read what I wrote.
“The way you fuck, the way you taste? For fuck's sake, Noah. I don’t want to know that shit,” Nicholas rolled his eyes.
I shrugged while bouncing on the soles of my feet with excitement. “Then plug your ears, man. Doesn't matter to me.”
Jolly was the one who spoke next. “The way you bend? The way you break? Fuck, what the hell happened in that hotel room?”
I smile the smallest of smiles. “All I’ll say is I was Mount Olympus.”
The three of them share yet another look before Folio shakes his head. “Didn’t need the image, bro.”
#noah sebastian#noah sebastian and reader#noah sebastian x reader#noah sebastian reader insert#noah sebastian smut#enemies to lovers#right person wrong time#starcrossed lovers
318 notes
·
View notes