#and you will be on the floor afterwards
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Moments before disaster.
#Bonus art#base is by melon-soup i believe#aradin#bg3 aradin#half elf#locke#dont call him a halfbreed#you'll get punched by a twink with 8 str#and you will be on the floor afterwards#BG3: Dsi#oh noes there's tadpoles#bg3#baldur's gate 3#warlock#tav#my tav
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what do you do when you’re tired of the fight?
you say: not again, no more, I can’t do this.
and you keep on living anyway.
#Genuine#this is not forced or toxic positivity#this is hope with blood under her fingernails dragging your own corpse kicking and screaming into tomorrow#this is not ‘your mother will miss you’#this is spite and anger and spittle and so much rage coinciding with so much emptiness#This is buttered toast for dinner and lying on the floor afterwards. This is salivating over the knives and leaving them in the block#or maybe it’s not. Maybe they don’t stay in the kitchen but you text your friend after. You put disinfectant on the wounds#This is so messy and so painful and not the end for you#Not yet#We’ll stay here together#And if you want I can hold your hand through it
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thinking about getting sexiled on short notice in my freshman dorm (worst case: coming back from a shower to find door locked & hair tie around the doorknob) and how ludicrous that seems to me now. "a fundamentally unserious way for people to coordinate around sexual activity"
#rambl#the dynamics around that were sociologically really interesting now that I think about it... my roommate and I never discussed it#it seemed obviously low status / incel coded to protest it!#separate note: so much inefficiency. why not auction off empty rooms on the floor.#a real civilization could solve this. we could have written an app. come on now#people at the horniest time of their lives forced to share a living space and you don't even have an app to coordinate room finding.#you could have some ground rules like 'bring your own blanket' and 'open the window afterwards' and if they're not abided by#(verified by photos I assume) the person's user rating gets docked#so the next time they send out a room request to the app people see 'a user with a 4.2 star cleanliness rating requests a room...'#+ 'will you be out for the next hour?' and the first pair of roommates to click 'yes' sell their room for the next hour#and get venmoed immediately
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I genuinely have no clue how someone can think "getting hit on the ear doesn't hurt"
Getting hit ANYWHERE on the head fucking hurts. I've got plenty of experience with it (various sources) for me personally, top of the head hurts worst (I have a gnarly scar there from a dog bite, very sensitive), but ear is pretty high on the list. Bonus Points for how the sensation made my tinnitus act up
The head is like a thin layer of watermelon rhine wrapped around the most precious organ in your body, and to discourage you from bashing it open, it was wrapped in meat that screams when it gets too close to a dangerous object.
I'm also having a hard time understanding how a person can come to that conclusion. It's... it's right there. You can touch and pull and smack your own ear. You will feel it hurt more than most other parts of your body.
I can only conclude that the anon has never had their ear physically abused, and quite frankly, I hope they never do. I hope they know their lack of personal experience is enviable.
#Anyone who hasn't been clobbered on the ear also probably doesn't understand how LOUD it feels#If you get hit at the wrong angle on the ear canal it feels like the air compresses down into it. It is extremely painful#And it rings afterwards#Cw physical abuse#Tw physical abuse#Physical abuse#Cw child abuse#Tw child abuse#Child abuse#And thats blunt force; i think one of the most painful incidents i went through was getting dragged across a floor by the ear#I've had black eyes. Been slapped in the face. Had a door hit me and been bonked with a car trunk#None of those hurt as much
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Raphael, holding his hand out and smiling: My dear Tav, want to dance with a charming man? Tav: I'd love to. Where is he?
#bg3#Raphael x Tav#ten years in jail for this slander#Raphael needing therapy after the game's through#when you look closely you can see the shards of his ego scattered across the floor#ofc Tav danced with him afterwards she was just joking#or was she#my quotes#incorrect quotes
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josh groban and annaleigh ashford's final final scene - january 14, 2024
#i heard someone was speaking on the 2023 revival's final scene so i had to serve this up#this is josh and annaleigh's FINAL final scene (my recording)#nellie's 'twice the wife' and 'that THING' nearly had me on the floor#sweeney's strangled cry of 'LEARN forgiveness'?? shoot me actually#her “NO”s are so fucking loud here when i'm telling you i felt them in my bones#someone near me was sniffling afterward. FAT MOOD#but yeah no pain and no sorrow to be found here#i love them endlessly. this was the best worst thing to ever happen to me!#sweeney todd#audio#annaleigh ashford#josh groban#anyway... sutton/aaron TOMORROW y'all!!!!! eyes emoji.
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Long-ass fandom rant because I need to scream into the void to find a reason to live let's gooooo
[For context I wrote most of this last friday which I thought was good to mention so the timeline makes a bit more sense. I really held off on this one XD Welp, let's start this trainwreck.]
Ok, I know I have other long posts I should be paying attention to (*cough* Keiji's shady shenanigans rant *cough*) among other probably more important things, but quickly wanna get this off my chest because it's kinda started to bug me and add even more concerns about the yttd fandom than I already have. This is specifically going to be about soushin-- yeah, yeah, I know-- but also bleed into something more... broad. Or broader. Idk, I'm a Tumblr user not a grammar teacher.
While browsing through Twitter I've been noticing a little spike in popularity for yttd with more fans and soushin shippers emerging as well. Which is cool, the game deserves all the praise and popularity it can get. And as someone whose been here for years, I'm glad that the fandom is slowly and steadily grown more accepting of soushin compared to the attitude around it way back when. There's been some genuinely really cool stuff that really does the ship justice from a lot of talented artist and writers that I absolutely love (will link some later), but something I've also been seeing a lot of from fans is what I can only describe as a "sanitisation resurgence" (but not really. kinda). A week or two ago on Twitter I stumbled across some soushin discourse where some people were sharing the sentiment that "if soushin end up being related and/or have a big age gap the ship is ruined". That they can only be two years apart max or else Nankidai has "fumbled them".
And the only response to that I had is "what". Like, how is that a deal breaker to you lot? How did you even get into the ship without accepting that those things could very likely end up being canon? How are you here and not ready to ship them no matter what's revealed about them after everything we've learned about them? Midori and Shin possibly being related was always on the table, and Midori potentially having already been an adult when Shin was in high school was always a very real possibility ever since we learned that he was never actually a student at his school. This is literally what soushin shippers got harassed by antis for years ago. Soushin is "problematic", and that's why people who shipped them where treated so badly in the fandom or just excluded all together. I can't count how many timed I've come across a "soushin shippers dni" or "soushiners are freaks and I hope you all have a bad day" or soushin fanfics/art with "I DON'T ACTUALLY SHIP IT BTW" and "not a ship" and "actual soushin shippers dni" attached to it. I can't recall how many times I had to explain myself with the "I ship but I don't condone it irl" or explain why I shipped them to not be labelled as a freak as if you need an excuse to ship anything fictional to begin with. I still remember soushin artist @uououoon and how they ended up deleting their Twitter account years ago because of the harassment and slanderous comments they were receiving for ships the fandom deemed problematic. When a person was saying their goodbyes to them on reddit and made some goodbye art (which is now deleted), some assholes in the comments were calling them weirdos and pedophiles for how they explored fiction and "glorified abuse" (which are the usual comments to uououoon's art posted on reddit unfortunately). I only caught wind of this one because back when they were still active in the fandom they were my favourite soushin artist and I went through their stuff almost every day and was tipped off when I randomly couldn't find their account anymore. They were such a nice and incredibly talented person too so the fact they essentially got bullied by a flock of stupid western fans seriously irritates me thinking about it again. This is why we cannot have nice things.
Soushin is "problematic". It's toxic and subtly abusive and important to the characters in question, but that didn't stop people from going after people who wanted to explore a dark, canon relationship (romantic, platonic or otherwise). How the actual hell did we go from "soushin has very toxic and problematic elements and you shouldn't be shipping it, you fucking freaks" to "you can ship it but don't make it actually problematic, you fucking freaks" like what is happening right now???? The worst part is that this is coming from other soushin shippers. The fact that there's actually soushiners with "proshippers dni" or "soushin is not for proship" genuinely makes me want to bite someone. Like, you horrible summer child-- not only are you demonstrating that you don't even know what "proship" actually means, but you're also spitting in the face of the people in our community that have CARRIED this ship for us for years. Why throw them under the bus to be one of the “good ones” in the eyes of antis when they hate us all anyway?
This brings us back to the sanitisation point: I feel like soushin is slowly being "sanitised" to fit the sensitive palette of antis by trying to make them as "morally acceptable" as possible. It's a worry I’ve had for a long time that once the fandom grows more accepting of the ship we'll be seeing more people basically scrubbing soushin of everything that made, well, soushin, to justify enjoying it. I've seen a bit of it already with a few people trying to say it's "not abusive" or just erase Shin's very obvious trauma by Midori all together for quite some time. Guess it's starting to happen on a bigger scale sooner rather than later. Maybe. Personally I don't think soushin having a big age gap or being related would ruin the ship. It just adds another layer of fucked up to their already fucked up relationship (I already hc Midori to be significantly older anyway so maybe I'm just biased). It doesn't really matter. I came here for toxic yaoi. I want nuclear waste level toxicity, not nuclear waste level toxicity presented in the most conventional and moral way possible. What would the point even be? It’s like packaging poison in a grape juice box. Like, it might be harmless to look at and more justifiable to think of as delicious, but it’s still poison. You making it look all cute and innocent isn’t going to change that. It's kinda funny and by that I mean not really that people will talk about wanting more "toxic yaoi" but when the yaoi is actually toxic and messy and horrific they will cry about it being "bad" or "ruined". You don't actually want dark dynamics, you want dark dynamics stripped of everything that makes them uncomfortable and dark so it's digestible to your tastes that don't even align with said dynamics in the first place. The worst part of this whole "soushin isn't proship so it's fine" bullshit is that it relies on trying to make the ship more "morally acceptable" or "legal" than other ships. Dawg, we are talking about abuse. You shouldn't be minimising that to say "well it's not [insert other terrible thing] so it's fine!!" That's not the "gotcha" you think it is. It’s one of the reasons why antis being into soushin made me feel weird cuz like you can’t ship it and then turn around to insult someone else, man (I’ve seen so many soushin defenders bash other “proships” to justify theirs like what are you doing--).
Realistically, the simplest and smartest thing to do when I see someone mischaracterise or butcher my faves is to either block or ignore and pretend to not care so I don't act on my sixth sense telling me to off them and myself. Realistically, this shouldn't be a big deal or anything that important, but this attitude is usually weaponized to harm and harass people who don't conform to their purity crisis over fiction. I'm in the unfortunate position of being not only a Your Turn to Die fandom dweller, but a Hazbin Hotel and The Coffin of Andy and Leyley one too. I'm used to being labelled a rapist and incest apologist irl who's delusional and deserves to be harassed and insulted by virtue of the media or ships I like (probably not a good thing). But people who are more active in these fandoms than me have it much worse as they get this shit directly waaaay more often while I mostly get called these things indirectly, which is what motivated me more to make this post.
So a couple days ago someone made some art of Monika from ddlc, Nikole (don't know the game sorry) and Ashley from Tcoaal. A lot of people on Twitter, unsurprisingly, bashed it for including Ashley to the point where some felt the need to clarify that they like her as a character but her actions (for some reason I do not understand like Monika has also done some seriously evil shit why are you not applying that logic to her too?). What struck me the most is that a yttd fan-- a self proclaimed "Midori enthusiast"-- ALSO quoted it to bash having Ashley in it. A freaking Midori fan. I told them to mind their business and start separating fiction and reality and to stop being a hypocrite, and thus ensued the most hilarious and stupidest convo I've had in a while:
You can literally count the seconds it takes for these guys to start throwing predator accusations and slurs at people. So "not exploring fiction correctly" makes me weird, but harming or putting real people on blast for nothing is free game, apparently. They're not the worst, both in this instance and in general, but it just stuck with me. Which is impressive, cuz I normally don't have much emotions to spare aside from general mild irritation for things like this. Maybe it's the Sonic feet.
But it ties into my issue. Midori's an absolute piece of garbage, yet some people will convince themselves that his actions are in some way justifiable to justify their hatred of something else (that is a lot less severe in this case) rather than love and let love. Tcoaal is not an "incest game" and if you describe it like that unironically you are not ready to be on the internet. No, it doesn't condone or glorify incest-- it literally does the opposite. If you need the characters to look into the camera and say "what we're doing is wrong and immoral" before doing something bad, I think you're the problem at that point. For the same reason you liking Midori (probably) doesn't mean you support human experimentation and torture, someone liking Tcoaal doesn't mean they support incest and someone shipping soushin doesn't mean they support abuse. These things are dark and shouldn't be condoned irl, but this is fiction. We can do whatever the hell we want. Being into darker themes and media doesn't have to reflect your real world views, but the inability to grasp that sentiment leads people to make their interests as moral and sanitised as possible and, feeling morally superior, will go after people who don't do that. This person deadass said that "incest is not morally grey and absolutely unjustifiable" (didn't even say that it wasn't btw) as if their blorbo hasn't committed so many atrocities for kicks that I personally find more unjustifiable. That line implies that they think that everything else Ashley has done and everything Midori has done can be justified because it wasn't incest specifically, which I find is a WILD thing to insinuate XD But it really does encapsulate the hoops antis will jump through to defend their likes while attacking yours despite the fact that it's literally the exact same as theirs. Rule of thumb: if someone accuses you of condoning something immoral because you like it in fiction, apply that logic to them, look at what they like and if their wet little meow meow is the Joker, Eren, Killua, Makima, Midori or whatever other morally bankrupt character you can come up with, take that as a confession and run. Cuz half the time these guys are actually nuts. While quote tweeting someone to shit on their art isn't the worst thing, considering how twitter has treated tcoaal artists the fact that they'd potentially open them up to harassment pissed me off, which is probably evident from my tone.
[Hi hi, this is me from the present right now cuz a more recent development came up so I’m using it as an example here too.]
While most of the things listed here have all been happening online, this attitude can come up in the real world as well.
As OP states, a bunch of hellaverse cosplayers were targetted at a french convention by haters of the show trying to ruin their cosplay. This is already completely unacceptable but the thing I can’t for the life of me get over is torching their costume while they’re still wearing it. Literally attempting to set someone on fire. All over a fucking show. It’s baffling how people can justify actions like this because they think your taste in fiction is so disgusting it’s Ok for them to hurt you. Not just online, but outside as well. It’s not the first time a hellaverse cosplayer has been harassed (last time it was a Valentino cosplayer but then again Val fans get shit from all sides all the time), and while I’m pretty sure these will remain as isolated cases it’s still scary to think about. What’s even more scary to think about how people think that their opinion on hazbin hotel has any relevance to the situation. So many of the comments in that post are just “I hate Hazbin Hotel, but—” or “I hate the fandom, but--” or “I hate Vivzie, but—” and I’m literally here ready to start pouncing like SHUT UP. No buts. That is not in any way important here. You not liking the show or the creator should not be important to the situation of cosplayers being actively harmed. You don’t have to signal your allegiances before showing basic human empathy, goddamnit. And what’s even worse is that some people have just turned this into a “b-but the hazbin fandom!!” issue, which is insulting. For example:
The “Hazbin fans do blackface and disrespect black people daily” is a reference to ONE Alastor cosplayer that nobody had defended. Not even fans. At least no one I can find. Yet they are using this one bad apple to generalise the whole fandom as "bad" and down play the amount of bullshit the hatedom does to fans on a regular. It kinda makes me feel sick that someone would look at a situation like this and spin this into a “fandom thing” rather than focusing on the victims. That they don’t deserve to be taken as seriously just because of the fandom their in. Some lunatic in the comments was literally completely minimising this whole thing saying “some red paint (fake blood capsules) isn’t nearly as bad as lynching and what black people have gone through in America” before calling anyone who called out that that’s completely irrelevant racist for liking Hazbin Hotel like are you kidding me. My homies in Christ, someone almost got lit on fire can everyone please stay on the goddamn topic. This is one of the rare moments where I was kinda proud of twitter as the majority of the comments and quotes where calling out their bullshit, but the amount of likes and some of the comments are still disappointing.
So what points am I trying to make here? This was very spontaneous and rushed so apologies if it feels messy cuz it very much is messy. But my main points boil down to this: Purification, sanitation and the “fiction equals reality” and "your fictional tastes reflect on you morality irl" arguments need to die. They just have to. While petting Shin on a daily basis gives me enough serotonin to find the will to live, the only true solace I will find is when people start being normal. People shouldn’t be getting harassed or labelled as freaks for fiction you don’t like both online and real life. People are not less worthy of basic human decency and empathy solely based on their fictional interests. People should be able to explore fiction however the hell they want without worrying about there being made a call out post on them somewhere. I search Tcoaal on twitter and there’ll always be a bunch of posts with over 10k likes calling all fans annoying weirdos or say it’s an “incest game” even tho it literally isn’t. I will try looking for some Valangel art on tumblr and see some loser use the tag to basically shit on everyone who ships it and lying about the treatment these shippers get while defending Charlastor or just shit on the ship in general. I just exist on the twitter side of the HH fandom chilling with other Val fans and literally every single one of them has either received death/rape threats or told to kill themselves, got ratio’d by a bunch of haters, had a call out post saying not to follow dedicated to them, had their art reposted and Val scribbled out, repeatedly accused of ““romantising a rapist””, or all of the fucking above. Valentino’s VA gets asked if he’s actually like the character he plays in real life or a fan being “relieved that he didn’t abuse them like Valentino” when they met (kudos to Joel for being chill about it btw I would be fuming this fandom does not deserve this man). I type in a certain controversial yttd ship to search and most of the latest posts are just people being rude, saying that if Nankidai makes them canon they’ll drop the game, calling the man himself a freak, calling other shippers freaks, shitting on soushin as well and then having soushiners defend their ship while also shitting on said controversial ship. It genuinely feels like fanbases are circuses and we are the clowns 💀
I could list other examples people being weirdos but I can't do that without breaking the momentum of this post even more than I already have. I guess what I wanted to vent about is how these attitudes regarding fiction and the way people police how others engage with it and how people think of you based on what you like can go from just annoying to downright dangerous more often than you’d think. That belief that you are morally superior to someone else based on the fact that you ship or like things the “legal” and “pure” and “healthy” way (which is never actually the case btw) can lead to you being really disrespectful or a complete asshole and not feeling bad about it at all, which does more harm than good. Which is why I thought it was important to bring up more extreme cases to empathise how this obsessive gatekeeping of fiction can and does hurt real people, who should be more important to you than fictional characters.
All of this is very likely going to sound very aggressive in tone and I want to quickly clarify that this is not meant to be an attack towards anyone in particular. I'm just tired and recalling all this stuff is making my mood sink like a stone lmao. Who knows, maybe I'm just overexaggerating and things won't get worse when the game gets more popular. This is just what I've been witnessing both in and out of my side of the moon. The amount of yttd fans I've seen act like this are a lot tho. No fandom is perfect obviously, and this one is the farthest from it, but with new people coming in and this weird attitude and need to sanitise not only towards soushin, but other "problematic" ships and media as well growing more prominent (mostly on Twitter and Tiktok) my biggest worry is that the hostility in this fandom will just... increase? Roulettefeel made pretty good posts about it-- my favourites being this one, also this one and this one's pretty short and sweet, summarising most of my soushin points a lot better and shorter than my trainwreck of a post so I recommend checking them out. If you like soushin, go check them out. If you don't like soushin, go check them out anyway. They make stuff outside of soushin too. They're pretty cool.
[I also want to add that the whole sanitisation thing in the yttd fandom is nothing new. It’s been a thing for longer than I have been here. I’ve just been seeing it again with soushin, which is was what made me want to do this in the first place. There’s another dynamic the fandom obviously does this for, but uttering it would not only get me flamed but straight up burned at the stake of bad takes so I’m saving that for a rainy day.]
Aaaaannd, I'm done, I think. I didn't have a good conclusion for this in mind. Idk, just be nice? You don't have to like "proships" (or what the fandom has defined as proship cuz that's not the actual definition), but that's what the block buttons for. Don't like, don't read, I say. Fandoms are for everyone and as long as what the person is doing is harmless, let them feel safe being themselves without having to worry about someone coming after them. Real life cops already suck. Let's not bring them into our collective escapism. And something you personally don't like ending up canon doesn't mean the game or ship is "ruined". That doesn't just go for soushin. That goes for other things too. To tie up loose ends, soushin having an age gap or being related has always been on the table and fits with other themes in the narrative. That does not count as "bad" if it makes sense. Soushin is not "Ok to ship" because it's "not an illegal ship" (whatever tf that means) and it's not "bad to ship" because it's "romanticising abuse". It's fine to ship because it's fictional. You don't need a moral justification to ship anything. That goes for all ships. That's why NOTPs exist. And "proship" doesn't and has never meant "shipping problematic pairings". It's a stance on shipping. It means being pro people being allowed to ship whatever they want. That includes being cool with problematic pairings, but is not limited to those. It means not being a fandom cop. Please stop saying otherwise, I cannot keep living this way--
Soooouuu, to end off on a more positive note and finally put this whole thing to bed I'll link some of my fav newer soushin accounts for anyone who's interested:
Hyo (orewagahai on ao3 check that out too): They are an amazing, amazing writer. If you're into dark, abusive co-dependent, complicated soushin with beautiful characterisation I would highly recommend. They just posted another soushin drabble on twitter and it's great.
jinn: They've been putting out banger after banger ever since getting into the game. Their art is absolutely stunning and they upload frequently, so go check 'em out if you can! It's actual medicine for the soul, I promise. They also draw for dead plate, so if you're into that go ahead too.
angel: Also cool. They're soushin art is hilarious and cute. As much of a sucker as I am for toxic, abusive sludge, they give thses two idiots a silliness that I enjoy. Also if you like trans!Shin content they're pretty good.
欣武 (my dumbass forgot to add them the first time sorry): They are INCREDIBLE. Extremely incredible artist. Their art is so, so freaking good. Not checking them out is absolutely your loss, ngl.
Be nice to them. If I catch anyone attempting to annoy them I'm coming after you and your entire family. Let's be better and not chase new comers off this time :3 Thanks for listening to my incoherent venting. This is mostly for me to feel a bit better, but anyone is free to read. If anyone's got an opinion or observation, feel free to offer it. I need coffee. Coffee sounds good.
#yttd#your turn to die#hazbin hotel#the coffin of andy and leyley#soushin#fandom discussion#fandom discourse#proship discourse#should go without saying but don't harass anyone mentioned here thank you. you won't see the light of heaven if you do#take a shot every time i say “soushin” cuz you'd be on the floor afterwards probably#i feel like i repeat a lot of words here in general. jesus.#anywho i just needed to let all that out. the last few weeks have been weird#sorry if this is unreadable and roundabout i didn't know how to get my thoughts straight#this is how i sound when i'm off coffee for a whole month#i've just been seeing a spike in people acting unhinged over fiction and not in the good way and it kinda gets to me#i just hate seeing people i like having to deal with bs cuz the fandom thinks they're exploring fiction “the wrong way”#and just pointing out and exploring certain things gets deemed “too problematic” and gets attacked despite being important to the plot--#and i just want to enjoy fiction or not mind problematic themes without getting qt and called the n-word repeatedly for responding#people can like whatever they want just don't slap others who like other things over the head and label them bad people#idk maybe that's too much to ask. maybe people'll always be like this but i have my blogs so if want something done right do it yourself ig#sorry for any typos this is mostly just uncut pure madness XD#momento rambles
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my honest reaction after watching fitmc's stream today
#live kai reaction#qsmp#WHATTT THE FUCKKKKKK#I JUST....MAN.....#:((#felt like my heart got wretched out of my chest#and someone put it in a blender#only to spill it onto the floor afterwards#ouagh.#are u telling me that despite all this time learning to love#he had it taken away from him in the end#and FUCK madagio#okay but genuinely very good stream 10/10 love you don huevo
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(lor good ending spoilers below)
after the final reception ends with the hrad's enforcers leaving, and the library is banished to the outskirts, you immediately rush to Binah's side to tend to her injuries and comfort her. after all, she'd done the same for you after every prior reception you handled
oh, you're terrified.
see, this is the first time you've seen her truly injured. she's told you about her first near-death experience, the almost imperceptible stiffness on her shoulders lost on everyone but you. you had merely given her hand a gentle squeeze of reassurance, watching her slowly exhale and give you a subtle smile. her hand is elegant and strong and covered in scars of all sizes, and she laces her fingers with yours in a firm, unbreakable grip
but now, now when you see her bleeding and unsteady on her feet and still looking at you with that small, soft smile, your heart shatters like glass and you rush over to support her, as she's done so many times for you. Binah chuckles, breath coming out short and clipped as you help her sit on the floor, her hand raising slowly to cup your cheek and wipe away tears you hadn't even noticed
"Hush, birdie. It'll be alright."
you sob and cling to her, unable to stop staring at the wounds inflicted by that other Arbiter, the one with short hair and an unbearably smug smile, carefully wrapping them in gauze as you would for any other employee. Binah merely sighs, somehow content, leaning her forehead against yours. she insists on tucking you in her cloak so she can wrap an arm around your shoulders, hugging you close with a gentle murmur and a kiss on your cheek. you're finally away from that wretched City, that horrid district, together
#project moon#lobotomy corp#library of ruina#binah#binah lobcorp#binah library of ruina#binah's very used to pain so she doesn't react much#yes it hurts but she has excellent tolerance and knows how not to show it#you both fall asleep for at least a day afterwards#no one will tell you if it was just on the floor#and everyone saw you two cuddling
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before.
#graphic design is my passion :D *dies*#i sacrificed my firstborn son for this#the yellow and orange beam/ray/walkway is a polarized glass floor btw in case anyone was wondering. nobody was? too bad.#also thanks to a few friends for their eyes for this LMAO#this is inspired by obviously the resistance cover and also two 1984 covers#i also know the song is in the past tense in the book since the point is you only really realize what it means afterwards#but since i tried to give a sort of before the fall version here its in the future tense#this is the graphic design equivalent of [random radio and tv transmissions broadcast on march 29th 2012 between 18:48 and 19:10] btw#muse band#resistance era#1984#george orwell#YES IM SORRY IM TAGGING THIS LMFAO
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Never underestimate the power of Baby to help with the depression
#like I still don’t feel amazing#but cradling a baby and rocking him to sleep really does wonders for the soul#rambles from the floor#just gotta watch out for the side effects of desperately wanting kids/a spouse you get afterwards
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How this morning went
#had absolutely terrible cramps so I decided I needed some time on the kitchen floor while I waited for the paracetamol to kick in#and Spotify decides to hit me with this (affectionate) horrible lineup#so had a fun time crying on the kitchen floor 👊#(hearing To The Bone immediately afterwards somehow made things worse)#but hey it could've been worse than it was (The Love You Want could've played)#mel's rambles#sleep token#st#worshitposting#tpwbyt#this place will become your tomb#telomeres#atlantic
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The fun part of digging into history from multiple different sources is that you start to piece together information about people across different eras, until history starts to feel like a massive crossover event involving surprise guest stars.
For example:
The book about Lincoln's Cabinet presents William Seward as the expected Republican candidate for the 1860 election. As they discuss his backstory I'm like, "Oh, he's Seward the anti-slavery New York Whig who influenced Zachary Taylor." And then they mention Seward becomes Lincoln's Secretary of State.
And I'm like
Wait a minute...
SEWARD'S FOLLY???
HE'S BEEN THE ALASKA MAN THIS WHOLE TIME???
An emergency trip to Wikipedia confirmed that he was. Which feels much stranger than it probably should, but in high school, all the Alaska stuff was presented as completely separate from the Civil War, so it's taken me a long time to put the pieces together. Still kind of fun to make connections like that, though.
#random thought of the day#history is awesome#presidential talk#a similar thing is learning that historical figures had lives before and after their most famous periods#like john quincy adams being monroe's secretary of state#and then serving in the house of representatives as a strident anti-slavery voice until he dies on the house floor in the 1840s#(and lincoln was there cuz it happened to be his one term as a representative)#or that dolly madison helped jefferson with first lady hostess duties because his wife had died#and then played a major social role for several presidencies afterward#or that james monroe's wife helped rescue lafayette's wife from the guillotine#this is just people living their lives but these facts feel like plot twists#because history gets fragmented into a bunch of different groups of facts#so you can forget how it all fits together
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It’s almost 2024 and Lannister posts are still like:
Cersei is a drunk, stupid, lazy, crazy, fat, ugly bitch who is exactly like her rapist and abuser 😡 (but did Bobby B really raped and abused that whore ??)
Poor Jaime everyone is so mean to him cause he killed Aerys and saved everyone and his bitch sister won’t break her back to accommodate his every whim 😥 But I know brienne will 😁
There are no Lannister stans, only male centered Jaime stans.
Misogyny is so crazy cause Cersei is one of the best-written characters in the books and genuinely has the complexity + nuance that Jaime stans (*cough*dick-riders*cough*) swear he has but since she's a female character, she gets reduced to a prop in his story. Minimally satisfying is the fact that even when they demonize her to hell and back, they can't find any way to make him seem interesting without bringing her up. His "redemption arc" is just his stans going "Doesn't he look so much better in comparison to Cersei?" and pretending that being in Brienne's proximity will magically purify him. The irony of people (i.e. his misogynistic stans) largely reducing him to his relationships with two female characters isn't lost on me. If they didn't hate women so much they could just enjoy Cersei's character, but I guess they like settling for crumbs of character development.
#ask#anon#anti jaime stans#pro cersei lannister#if that wasn't a tag before then it is one now#Dany Arya Cat Cersei and Brienne being the quintet of well developed female characters that fandom loves to ignore#but will gladly project their development onto other more /palatable/ characters...my villain origin story fr#Cersei's writing is a feast and Jaime's is the table scraps that dropped onto the floor afterwards#like how can George have such issues with misogyny but still give his best writing to his female characters?? I need a study done#George gave context to his decision to kill Aerys and went /that's enough development ✨/#he doesn't even decided to help Brienne for the right reasons and his main motivation for leaving Cersei was mostly spite#since he was possessive and couldn't handle her sleeping with other men (and not him realizing Cersei is evil like people pretend)#if you took a shot every time he thought about Tyrion telling him that you'd be blackout drunk but apparently everyone misses that...hmmm#but no his misogyny is actually him being teenage girl coded don't you know? 🙄#unfortunately if there's one area where I doubt George it's for the conclusions of Cersei and Jaime's stories but god willing#he follows through on his explorations of Cersei's character and doesn't give Jaime any unearned development
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Idea I’ve had since forever: if you subscribe to the lore that the sun and stars are holes punched in the fabric of nirn and it’s all light from aetherius, the realm from which magic flows, would hitting the sun with blood cursed arrows from the Dawnguard dlc affect magic on Tamriel somehow, if not outright nullify it?
#like could you imagine. sun turns off and sky turns red and suddenly no one can use magic. except vampires maybe#Skyrim#tes#lore#magic#in my Skyrim continuity my ldb does side technically with the Dawnguard but I’ve been toying with harkon getting the bow and managing to#to fire off 1 bloodcursed arrow#hell on nirn for about 3 hours before toki and serana can wrestle it back#or a few days. whatever#either way baffles and freaks the hell out of magicians tryna figure out what happened afterwards#oblivion crisis 2.0??? hard cut to ldb passed out on the floor using the legendary bow of auriel as a pillow. snoring loudly#no one has any clue until like centuries later when some rando scholar is looking through ldb’s journals and comes across it all
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"Try eating things, even if you don't like them" is probably the most useless advice for ARFID. I can not eat foods I do not like because I will throw them up; that's not an assumption or a fear or a phobia, it's an observation from the multiple times I have literally done so.
#personal#arfid#avoidant restrictive food intake disorder#you can try to eat horse shit off the ground all you want but youre probably just gonna vomit in the process#the moment i always think abt is when i was 9-10~ and picked up a singular piece of salad with a napkin#and it was so disgusting to me i puked in my mouth. swallowed it back down afterwards even 😒#if you force me to eat something dont blame me when theres puke all over your floor and shoes 🙄
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