#he had it taken away from him in the end
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my honest reaction after watching fitmc's stream today
#live kai reaction#qsmp#WHATTT THE FUCKKKKKK#I JUST....MAN.....#:((#felt like my heart got wretched out of my chest#and someone put it in a blender#only to spill it onto the floor afterwards#ouagh.#are u telling me that despite all this time learning to love#he had it taken away from him in the end#and FUCK madagio#okay but genuinely very good stream 10/10 love you don huevo
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The boy stops in his tracks. “I know you,” he says, tilting his head curiously. He’s not tall, but he’s regal nonetheless, dressed all in white. Something about him makes Leia’s hair stand on end, and although she hides it she feels a stirring in her own chest. I know you like I know my own soul, she thinks wildly, and wonders where it came from. Has she gone insane?
“That’s nice,” she says, and shoots him anyway.
He deflects it in a flash of light, a glowing blue laser sword appearing in his hand like magic. She’s only seen one of those before, and it’s Vader’s. If this boy is anything like Vader, she realizes, she’s in deep shit.
She’s smart enough to know when she’s outmatched. Leia makes the tactical decision to run for her life.
Later, as she’s getting the hell out of there, she wonders why he didn’t try to stop her.
She remembers being young and tugging on her mothers skirts, demanding to know why their guest was so sad. “Does he not like it here?” She’d asked, and then, trembling, because Kenobi always seemed saddest around her. “Is it…because of me?”
“Oh, Leia,” her mother sighed, lifting her into her arms. “It’s not that, I promise.”
“Then what is it?”
“Master Kenobi lost a child under his care, years ago.” Breha’s eyes grew deeper, darker. “It was not his fault, but he blames himself. You remind him of that child, that’s all.”
Leia had quieted at that, contemplative.
The next time she’d seen Master Kenobi, she had given him a hug. He didn’t seem to know what to do with that, so she resolved to give him more of them. “He’s lonely,” she’d told her mother. “No one should be lonely.”
Looking at Obi-Wan Kenobi now, the memory seemed so far away. He’d aged thirty years in the ten it had been.
He looks, Leia thinks with a small twinge of regret, very lonely.
“Leia,” he greets. “It’s been a long time.”
Out of the corner of her eye, Leia sees a glint of white.
Kenobi freezes in his tracks. “Luke?” He whispers, and through the distance Leia can hear it as if he’d been speaking directly into her ear.
Master Kenobi lost a child under his care, her mother whispers in her head. He blames himself.
In an instant, Leia understands everything.
Kenobi is still staring at the boy he’d lost so long ago when Vader cuts him down.
Later, as she’s pacing around on the Falcon to Han muttering darkly about Princesses and supernatural abilities, she rememberers the way the boy collapsed, as if all his strings had been cut. Vader was too occupied with him to even look at her as she shot at him desperately.
Luke. She hates him more than she hates herself.
“They know where you are,” he hisses frantically. “They’re coming for you. You have to run.”
“Wait!” Leia quickly pulls up their sonar. Nothing yet, but it would explain the distant queasiness she’d felt since they’d landed. She tended to trust her gut. “How do you know? How much time do we have?”
“Not important, and not enough,” he says. “I have to go, and so do you. You need to leave yesterday.”
“How do I know I can trust you? I don’t even know who you are.”
He pauses. “Call me Skywalker.”
“That’s not an answer, Skywalker.”
“Yes it is.”
She opens her mouth to argue, but there are faint voices on the other end, drawing nearer.
“Shit,” Skywalker mutters. “I have to go. I’ll be in contact, okay? Don’t ever tell me where you are, or where you’re heading. Vader and Palpatine aren’t shy about reading minds. Just leave as soon as you can, and figure out the rest.”
“But—“
It’s too late. The comm has disconnected.
She stares down at it, disbelieving. How would the Empire know they’re here? Why should she trust a stranger who somehow got her personal comm code?
Gut feeling or not, on paper this was a perfect location. Supplied, armored, and most importantly, extremely well hidden. There was no real reason to think it would possibly be found out.
It’s probably a trap. Almost definitely a trap.
Han sticks his head in the door, a sour look on his face. “Hey Princess, can you tell these idiots—“
She makes a decision then and there.
“We’re leaving.”
“What?”
“We’re evacuating, effective immediately.” She pushes past him, and he follows so close he’s nearly stepping on her heel.
“Why? I think it’s pretty cozy here. Actual sunlight doesn’t hurt, either.”
“Apparently too cozy.” She grabs the first person she sees, a pilot who stares at her with wide eyes. “Emergency evacuation. Spread the word to pack everything you can and leave, I’ll let you know where we’re headed when we’re in orbit.”
He salutes and scurries off.
“Woah, hey now.” Han snatches at her elbow until she turns around to face him. “What’s going on?”
“There’s a new informant. He told me the Empire knows we’re here. They’re coming for us.”
“And you trust this person because…”
“I don’t have a choice,” she snaps. Someone runs past them, holding three packs filled to the brim with rations. “It’s either he’s lying and we’re not in danger, or he’s telling the truth and we’re going to die if we don’t listen. It’s not exactly hard math.”
It could be a trap of course, but he hadn’t suggested any sort of direction or destination to follow, and Leia wasn’t inclined to share. Especially not after his tidbit about Vader and Palpatine reading minds.
He squints at her. “That’s not it.”
“What?”
“I don’t believe you,” he insists. He’s so infuriating. Leia doesn’t know why she hasn’t kicked him out yet.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Yes you do, and you’re either gonna tell me why, or find a different transport when we head out of here.”
“Who said I was riding on your hunk of junk?” She demands. She actually was planning on going with them, since the Falcon has more than enough room for all the supplies that can’t fit in the other ships and none of the trustworthiness of the other pilots, but Han doesn’t need to know that.
“Well?”
Damn him. Damn him for knowing how to read her. She doesn’t know when she let that happen.
“I feel it,” she admits, defeated. “Something tells me he’s trustworthy. We’ll wait and see if it’s right.”
He studies her. She holds her head high, but inside she’s jittery at the scrutiny. They don’t have time for this.
“Yeah, all right,” Han finally says.
“Really?”
“Yes, really.” He rolls his eyes, like she’s not acting absolutely insane by putting all her trust in a random man she’s never even met. “Now come on, Princess, weren’t you the one who said we had to hurry?”
What is it about this man that makes it impossible to tell whether she wants to punch him or drag him into the nearest supply closet? They don’t have time to find out.
“So there’s good news and bad news.”
“Bad news first,” she demands.
“They know there’s a mole.”
“Shit.” Of course they know, how could they not? She should have been more careful, less obvious about the correlation of their movements with the Empire’s plans. “The good news?”
“They’ve tasked me with hunting down this ‘pathetic rebel spy,’” Skywalker says, humor in his voice. “That should buy me some time.”
Leia can’t quite stop the snort she lets out. “Seriously?”
“Yep. You’re speaking to a professional mole-hunter, here.”
“Well congratulations on the promotion, Skywalker.”
“Thank you,” he says grandly. Then, quieter, “It won’t last, Princess. They’ll find out eventually.”
“I know. Just hang in there, it will be over soon.”
“Will it?” He asks, suddenly sounding very young. She realizes that she has no idea how old he is. She doesn’t know anything about the man who has saved them more times than she cared to admit, and the idea rattles her until they sign off.
Later, she looks up the name Skywalker in their archives. There are a few results, but only one sticks out.
Anakin Skywalker, Jedi Knight and hero of the Clone Wars. Killed at the hands of Darth Vader. There are gossip articles too, speculations on his relationship with the pregnant Senator Padmé Amidala, who died around the same time Skywalker did. The baby, it seems, died with her.
Unless he didn’t.
It’s ridiculous. It’s impossible. The idea is so ludicrous that Leia almost rejects it entirely.
But it makes sense. By the Maker, it makes sense.
The child of Anakin Skywalker, it seems, would be a powerful Force user indeed. Powerful enough for Kenobi to take the baby and run. Powerful enough for the Emperor to want him for his own gain. Powerful enough to send Vader after Kenobi and take the boy himself.
Maybe even powerful enough to shield his mind from Vader and Palpatine’s intrusions.
Powerful enough to hide the fact that he’s a spy.
Leia sinks into her chair, covering her face as she laughs.
Maybe Luke isn’t so bad after all.
“No, no, no,” she mutters, digging through the smoking wreckage of the TIE fighter. “Don’t be dead, please don’t be dead.”
“Princess…” Han lays a hand on her shoulder that she immediately shrugs off.
“No, he’s not dead. He’s not. Luke!”
A faint cough answers her, and she’s so relieved to hear it she could cry. Behind her, Han starts bellowing for a medic and, “Some damn help here, do you expect us to move all this ourselves?”
“Luke, it’s me,��� she sobs. “It’s Leia. You’re at the Rebel Base. You’re safe.”
More coughing, and there’s a worrying rasp to his voice when he says, “You know…my name?”
“I figured it out.”
“Smart.” This time, the coughing is so bad Leia and Han both wince.
“Shit, kid,” Han says, moving another piece of rubble. “Don’t talk. We’re gonna get you out of here, all right?”
“Stand back,” Luke chokes out.
“What?”
“Stand back. Please.”
Han protests, but something in Leia knows they should listen to him. She drags him back, and motions everyone else to fall back with them. They do, albeit reluctantly.
“Clear,” she calls, hoping Luke can hear her.
The TIE explodes.
“Fuck!” Han goes back in, Leia on his heels with the terrifying feeling that she’d just allowed Luke to die, before they both stop in their tracks. Around them, the broken pieces of the TIE are floating.
And curled up in the middle is a man dressed all in white.
“Luke!” She pushes past Han to start dragging him out, and after another moment of staring around them, he helps her.
As soon as they get clear, the pieces fall to the ground with a clatter. Luke falls limp with them.
Han is still looking at the TIE. “Can you do that?” He asks quietly.
Leia pauses her examination of the unconscious man in front of her to glare at him. “Is that what you’re most concerned with right now? Really?”
“Excuse me for asking, Princess!”
“It’s white,” Luke grumbles, pulling at his hospital gown bitterly. “I hate wearing white.”
“Should I be offended?”
He rolls his eyes. “Don’t even. You look great and you know it. I just feel like I never left.”
“Well,” she says gingerly. “I guess it’s a good thing you got sick of it. If we went around in matching outfits all the time, people might think we’re twins.”
He snorts. “Yeah, right.”
#star wars#star wars fanfiction#luke skywalker#han solo#leia organa#imperial luke skywalker#exactly when luke was taken by the empire is totally up to speculation it could honestly be anywhere from newborn to 5#as for why luke has his dad’s blue lightsaber here instead of like a red one or smth- well you see your honor I thought it would be a slay#but also when you think about it for more than 5 seconds you’re like actually yeah that’s sick and twisted of palpatine and vader actually#you’re carrying your fathers most treasured weapon#you don’t know your father once fought the rise of the very empire you stand to inherit with that blade. you don’t know who he defended#you don’t know your father brought about the end of the republic with that same weapon#he killed the younglings with it. he fought his closest companion with it#you’re carrying what was once your fathers most treasured weapon. you are your fathers most treasured weapon#just as your father is a weapon now#also I didn’t make it clear but obi-wan has his ‘strike me down and I become stronger’ moment like he still dies on purpose to cause proble#but when he saw luke he couldn’t look away. he had to see him with living eyes one last time#can u tell I had So Many Thoughts on everyone else’s perspective in this fic too#han is having a constant crisis in the background because 1) force is real 2) princess is annoying AND pretty which sucks for him#in particular and 3) pretty princess is learning to use the force and is hot while doing it. Chewie is laughing at him. life is hell#good lord did not mean to put an entire essay in the tags. i love their super special twin powers (cosmic entity that binds their souls)#edit: GUYS I FORGOT TO NAME THE FUCKING AU#AND WHEN I TRY AND FIX IT IT GLITCHES OUT ON MEEE 😭😭😭
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had a thought this morning that Eddie could’ve broken up with Marisol in 7x05 and his 7b storyline would’ve still been the exact same 💀
#Eddie still could’ve lied about who he was seeing and where he was going#bc he knew he was walking down a dangerous path and knew what Buck’s reaction would’ve been if he told him#buck or Carla could’ve walked in on him with Chris#and everything would’ve still happened the same way#bc it wasn’t even about her in the end!!!!#their breakup happened off screen!!!!#it was about christopher and this impacted *him*#*and how#we don’t get to see marisol’s reaction or Eddie’s parents’ reaction to Marisol#her involvement doesn’t actually play any role!!!!!#tbh he could’ve broken her off screen pre s7 and all they would’ve had to change was his 7x05 storyline#911 related#anyway I just feel like it would’ve taken away some of the mess from the storyline y’know!!!!!#even though it’s still messy lol
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I caved and made them real. Obverse me losing more and more motivation to draw as I made each of these back to back lol
#keese draws#oc art#oc#pmd#pokemon#pokemon mystery dungeon#pmd oc#these guys are inspired by my usual pokerogue team#oh also imagine a question mark after every he/him I have the trans woman beam pointed at all of them#these are just initial concepts for the actual characters themselves now that I’ve developed the world a lil bit#but yeah these 4 were childhood friends who wanted to be in an exploration team together but had to split up for years#tart and quart both had to move away and cart ended up leaving his hometown to try and become a real adventure a few months later#cart and bart remained in contact for a few years before cart got caught up in some crime circles#he was incredibly trusting when he was younger so he got taken advantage of and ended up digging himself a deeper hole in an attempt to be#manipulative back and eventually he got scared enough that he tried to reach out to a guild and acted as a spy for them in turn for them#eventually helping to clear his name and allowing him membership#there were parts of the deal that were unfair and kind of shady but he was desperate enough to pretend he didn’t notice#after he joined he started immediately putting out listings for new team members and he fully planned on being super picky#but when two of his childhood friends applied he was over the moon about it#and immediately accepted both of them#now quart also applied because he had recently ran away from his old life and was desperate to have a new one#and he missed his old friends deeply so when he saw one of them actually managed to start building the team they all wanted to make he was#quick to apply even if he was rusty as hell on normal non contest combat#cart didn’t recognize him at first and mostly only let him have a trial run because he thought it was funny that an eevee of all things was#applying for a high level exploration team and he fully planned on telling quart off immediately afterwards#this ofc made quart very upset and angry but he didn’t try to clairify who he was because he just assumed that time had made cart into an#asshole which isn’t wrong per say but quart didn’t realize cart didn’t recognize him#it was a rough trial expedition but cart found himself actually quite impressed with quart’s slight of paw skills and his impressive biting#speed so he decided to give quart a real chance instead of a mocking one#eventually quart laughs for the first time around him and that makes cart realize who he is and that makes him feel horrible
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Who do you wish to be?
He was not any of them. He was—he was nothing but himself.
A man who had known loss and pain, yes.
But a man who had known friendship and joy.
The loss and pain—they had not broken him wholly. Without them, would the moments of happiness be as bright? Without them, would he fight so hard to ensure it did not happen again?
Who do you wish to be?
A king worthy of his crown. A king who would rebuild what had been shattered, both within himself and in his lands.
#Dorian Havilliard#King Dorian#King Dorian Havilliard#Dorian Havilliard quotes#Kingdom of Ash quotes#Kingdom of Ash#Sarah J. Maas#Chapter 77#character arc#no spoilers please#And he let his hand fall away from the blade entirely as he stared down at the weeping girl.#Manon would have ended it. Freed her in the only way left. Chaol would have taken her with him and damned the consequences.#Aelin ... He didn't know what she would have done. — Perhaps fate too?#Kaltain had endured like the children of Terrasen and been strong enough to break the collar#I’m crying — beautiful — I love him — he’s a good man how it should be#he’d make Adarlan the best it could want to be
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ahem. and if i may be completely unwell about the moose and slug for a moment,
i keep thinking about a post-story scene where lumpus and slinkman's relationship is still in rocky territory, and they have like... kind of a half-arguement getting ready for bed and it doesn't really go anywhere but there's still a tension in the air, and then a moment of silence as they settle and face each other in the dark. there's a beat. and then slinkman just... reaches over to take lumpus' glasses off (he'd always been in the habit of adjusting them over the years), and he's confused for a second, and slinkman's just like "you shouldn't sleep with those on. you're going to break them" which is like, ah, yes, completely logical action, and something he's told him a million times,
but it's Also like "Oh, God. even when you don't have to anymore, and you said you'd stop doing it all the time, and you're mad at me, you're still taking care of me just because you care enough to that it's complete subconscious instinct for you to do so. i'm gonna jump off a cliff"
because, when you're in the dark, in complete silence, sharing a shoddy pull-out couch bed in the basement of your stupid hand-me-down bait-and-tackle shop with your life-long best friend, your only friend, almost a bit like you used to when you'd push your beds closer together at night the camp you loved all those years ago, well, then there's also nothing else around to distract from the fact that you appreciate that more than anything in the entire world
and so lumpus takes a second and is like ....Right. (voice crack) Of course. and turns to face the ceiling and feels like he's going to be sick <- (i love nausea being one of lumpus' gut responses to feeling things ❤️)
#camp lazlo#talk#scoutmaster lumpus#slinkman#shipping stuff#majorly gay ass little post here sorry (moment of weakness)#ugh... like lumpus is a selfish person and he gets slinkman to do everything for him for a few different reasons right#but another part of that is that it's just become routine#it's a routine. it's monotonous. it's an expectaction. that's what their dynamic ended up becoming after all that time#so when slinkman is fed up with his bullshit and starts withdrawing his warmth and help then and only then does lumpus start to realize#the weight of everything and where it all began and how much the kindness and attention and safety had absolutely decimated him at the star#he hasn't been getting all that anymore and with slinkman that's a very noticable absence#so like reintroducing it into the ecosystem again there when there's nothing else to pay attention to but that#certified I'm Going To Throw Up moment#[algonquin voice] oh. i see. no one is ever going to care about me like slinkman again#there's almost something about jane's sweetness and the stuff shs and slinkman has in common y'know#but he's just been receiving it from slinkman forever now! it's different!!! until it's suddenly and very purposefully taken away!#if he can just pull his head out of his own ass for a second;#he is sentimental and feels out his loneliness and overall lack of love from the world#all of that does get to him and he does admire things like that in people like jane#slinkman is over here feeling like nothing he does is ever actually appreciated#but it wasn't always like that. not in the slightest#he's just forgotten what's in front of him#do you get it. huh. are you starting to pick up what i'm putting down#it's okay if not though cus that's what my other billions of words are for ❤️ yay ❤️#post-story
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FTWDs final season could have been so much better if it was revealed that Troy was running padre and controlling madison (as revenge) this whole time. He knew enough about nick and Alicia to make madison think padre knew who and where they were this whole time. And here are some other reasons how this storyline would make sense and be more interesting:
- Troy has a military background so him taking over and running a military base makes more sense than two teenagers building it up by themselves because all the adults died.
- taking and training up children to be solidiers also would make a little sense because of his own fucked up upbringing and the idea he has of the type of people who were made for this world. He would have probably had the same idea as shrike, that the kids stood a better chance at padre than with their “weak” parents. The mother of his child dying for being a good person and not getting to raise their daughter (who would not be named after his abuser) could have also played into this idea of the kids being separated from their good parents.
- shrikes radiation cure experiments: Troy ran walker bite experiments before, just to see how people would turn. So it would also make sense if the work we see shrike doing was something he approved of or an idea he himself came up with. As for shrike, it would make sense that she turned out this way if she’d spent years being mentored by someone like troy otto instead of becoming evil and stealing children just because her dad died.
- the scene where madison smashes the glass to expose “padre” would have been such a good and shocking reveal if it was Troy. Imagine Madison finding out that Troy is not only alive but had been the one running this the whole time!
There’s also a lot of other things I would have done differently for the other characters too and I would have liked Madison to have a little villain era and do some really fucked up shit as she tries to take down Troy and padre. How dark would Madison go? Would she survive with her humanity still intact?
I know I’m just talking into the void here because no one care about this shitshow but I just hate it when shows have a plot that could have been good, maybe even great but then completely miss the mark and fans come with better theories and ideas with minimal effort and thought.
#somewhere dave erickson is screaming (and relieved that at least frank dillane stayed away from the show lmao)#fear the walking dead#ftwd#madison clark#troy otto#i also would have had s7a focus on strand vs alicia but v differently with only alicia’s ending staying the same pretty much#then 7b would have been wrapping things up with morgans family and actually seeing the group being taken by padre before having a time jump#then season 8 would have been the much better padre/troy/madison arc#the way these writers reaally do not know how to write for troy and madison#it’s like they tried doing what they thought DE wouldve done with them but couldn’t decide if they wanted them to be villains or be redeemed#anyway i will always mourn the arcs we were meant to have in season 4#madison becoming the villain vs nick and alicia and whatever was planned for troy#troy was only killed off bc dave didn’t trust the new showrunners with him and he couldnt save the OGs by killing them too lmao#but i am glad alicia is alive and we got to see daniel sharmans acting bc most of the cast were only giving about 20% atp#but who can blame them? the writing got to new levels of bad in s7/8 and their personalities were changing every few episodes#actually to be fair they did the best with what they were given they just seemed done#i only tuned in to alicias episodes in s7 so my opinion on the rest of it is from what ive read bc i just could not get through it#so my opinion on the characters full arcs in s7 may be wrong
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rewatching S6 in bits and pieces for current fic and ahhhhhhhhhh but the whole Jack, Diana, Mosley and Lizzie final dinner is so *viscerally* fucking satisfying on every sensory and intellectual and emotional level of consumption.
#every single movement facial expression breath flick of an eye the choice of 'mosley' not 'mr mosley'#the way mosley says 'lizzie' for the first time#jack's buildup and his mad fucking innuendo just before diana and oswald show#particularly how every drink is taken and by whom and when#lizzie constantly holding herself back the entire time from Saying Something all these flinches and half-breaths#insane#INSANE#as much as the end of S3 is roaringly wrenchingly furiously emotionally good#this dinner is something else#this whole episode is pretty much something else though fffffffffffff#jack's patronising constant reference to tommy as if he's a much younger man/boy when you look at these two guys and jack looks younger??#by design i am sure#in the scene with the tie before the dinner.the way tommy's face says one thing while facing away from lizzie#then he puts on that mask as he turns to face her and you can SEE HIM DO THAT jesus#it would a writing exercise and a half to actually try to capture that scene in writing and work out what needs to be said/described#to carry the same effect because @coffeeatnight23 -> this scene is totally Tommy ripping his own heart out then eating it with relish :)#it *is* the saddest thing but also a fucking *reclamation* of something that tommy hasn't had since his suicide attempt. there's lots of#small reclamations of self that happen in post-Ruby S6 i seem to recall. despite flicks old trauma/foggy memory wandering also this-#-sort of structural shift/acceptance he is who he is and that is how he has agency (not solely money?)#anyway it's not triumph but there is *something* that i haven't found the word for yet#acceptance is one word but there's something more vicarious and dark in it that acceptance doesn't connote
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good morning I just woke up from a dream where I met lando norris and for some reason he was flirty, followed me from both a burner account and hi ls real account and kept messaging me (?)
#I am MAD I woke up 🤬🤬🤬#wdym lando doesnt follow me and we’re not one step away from dating#he said he would CALL#and he actually did#crazy#I remember I was kknda taken aback and almost told him not to follow me lol#but then I remembered my account is private and I was like key fine go ahead :)#but he was SO firty it made me giggle like a school girl#max was there too#it was a cute dream#the photographers got some cute pics of us interacint and there was one of me max and his gf when lando had to leave real quick#also shocking mick schumacher showed up close to the ending for some reason lol#the reason: he was probably jealous! jk jk#anyways#crazy crazy dream I love it#Im gonna talk about my f1 dreams here now#millies dream#ln4
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Muppet ass bird movie
#the boy and the heron was good! visually stunning#however. I think it falls into the same trap that everything since ponyo and arietty has fallen into#which is too many elements. the ‘rock’ was unnecessary. it should have just been more of a… crazy wizard guy found some way to alter the spo#spirit world/afterlife on his own? I think the element of accepting new family members was a bit lost.#the heron wanting to bring him to the spirit world would have been a bit more impactful if he had been the g.grand uncle in disguise?#parrots were a really fun element but using them as the end-villain was not satisfying#there was a chance to have the main character decide the end of the plot but that was just taken away from him#cursed with never remembering character names. but the plot I was expecting was a bit more mature with the pregnant aunt being asked to give#up her child to be the next wizard or something. like that’s why she was brought there. because the main character resisted so much so they#took the next youngest of kin to raise in the spirit world#man. that said the scenery surrounding the first pelican scene until they get the fish is like. directly from many dreams I’ve had
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You're a good man, dean. everything you've ever done you've done for the right reasons. You're a good man, dean. everything you've ever done you've done for the right reasons. You're a good man, dean. You'll never hear me say the real you is anything but good. The mark is evil not you. You summoned me because you knew I would do anything to protect you. You're not an evil man, dean. You're a good man crying to be heard. You had a good reason, dean. You let Michael in because you were protecting me, dean. You're a good man, dean. everything you've ever done you've done for the right reasons
#samdean#sam's most insane line this stays in my head rotting it#sometimes i realize sam in later seasons is basically the perfect little brother that dean wished for the entire time#and even though he gets the one thing he wished he had he ends up hurting and mistreating him#but the moment its like he's about to lose sam he becomes like a kid who just realized he wanted this toy so bad#and clings with arms and legs so it wont be taken away from him or shelves it away bc he's terrifed it could be scratched#bc it's all he has when in reality he hadn't been treasuring it (him) properly nor is it the only thing (person) he has#but from the child's (dean's) pov reality is distorted to the max i mean dean ultimately comes around but yea#spn meta in tags lmao#wincest#sam winchester#dean winchester#mine
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Replayed Modern Warfare 3 2011 on Veteran tonight and goooooooood night. Blood Brothers never gets any easier to watch no matter how many times you've done it and the ending really never misses huh
I apologize for the amount of yapping in the tags I reread it all on mobile and started giggling because it went on for so long but eh. Blessed are those who won't shut the freak up and all that
#call of duty#modern warfare 3 2011#i just. wow. wow wow wow wow wow#i've played these three games so many times over the last several years and i just.#they literally. never get old.#loose ends and blood brothers will never not make me cry and endgame and dust to dust will never not make me smile so hard#ending it with price smoking the cigar like he did in the first mission in the first game wHEN HE FIRST MET SOAP JUST UGHHHHHH.#i know y'all don't care but i don't care that y'all don't care i could literally yap about this until i shrivel up and die#i have never ever ever in my LIFE seen poetic justice played out so beautifully like it is at the very end#JUST. WOW. WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW. WOW WOW. WOW#they do not frickin make games like that anymore DADGUM#i also forgot how frickin sad down the rabbit hole is?? like jeez louise they didn't have much screen time but gosh#i also have never in my life heard such gut-wrenching anguish from a grown man in my life like price in that one scene#I KNOW Y'ALL KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT THAT MAN MAKES ME FULL ON S O B IN THAT PART HE HAD NO BUSINESS#anyway i'll keep cutely living in denial and pretending literally any of the main characters besides price and nikolai are fine <3#foley and dunn and their team seemed just fine at the end of modern warfare 2 so i will accept that small mercy#at this point these games have taken everything else i love away from me so#y'all probably think i'm wild for how insane i get over these games but the nostalgia bit is a big part of it as well#like they're honestly in my opinion genuinely the greatest video games of all time#but the fact that i have that connection with my dad makes it so special#crazy cause he said he also cried in blood brothers and my dad is 54 and i have seen him cry one (1) other time in my entire life#heck infinity ward but also bless them i hope the devs live long beautiful wonderful prosperous delightful exciting fulfilling lives#Lord bless them and their entire bloodline for the contributions they have made to humanity not even joking#AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THE FREAKING SOUNDTRACKS DO NOT GO THERE OAUSYDJAKAKDN#MW2 AND MW3 CREDITS. EXTRACTION POINT. COUP DE GRACE. RETREAT AND REVEILLE. CONTINGENCY. PARIS SIEGE. PRAGUE HOSTILITIES. RUSSIAN WARFARE.#UGHHHHHHHGHHHH everything about these games is so unbelievably perfect and immaculate#i have got to get over my art block NOWWWWWWWWWW#makarov is also the best villain i've ever seen idc bro he's frickin awesome#i mean obviously he's horrible and a disgustingly evil human being but as a character he's stupidly well-written
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You know something I am really sad about is how the TARDIS interior changed for tenteen. It would have been a whole different story if the clothes had been normal but like this? Everthing the Doctor was just vanished and got replaced. The screwdriver coming out of nothing? The outfit? A new fancy TARDIS?
10 kept the TARDIS from 9 and 12 from 11. 13 had to fight to get her TARDIS back and built herself a new screwdriver in the meantime. 11 had to let her recalibrate until she was usable again and gave him a new screwdriver (? I think ? Don't quite remember where he got the sonic) All of them CHOSE their new outfit and had a whole thing where they searched for it.
And tenteen just gets all those things like this, appearing in his lap. Which is convenient, sure, but I feel like he really lost the identification process on the way. Maybe not as important for him as he knows the body and mind and companion already (in theory) but like, I am not surprised he is going through it like this. He just wanted to hang on to Yaz, wasn't allowed that, lost her, decided she was gonna be excited for change, didn't really get change either and then everything they could hold onto as part of their last identity, everything that was theirs to let go off, just got ripped out of his hands replaced with a weird mixture of 'look how new and nice and shiny' and 'isn't that lovely reminiscent of 4 bodies ago'. No wonder they are running on their gingiva*, I would be so lost and disoriented in his place.
And then obviously from a meta pov I dislike that 15 is apparently copying tenteen's TARDIS now. We got a scene of tenteen exploring the new TARDIS and being excited but for 15 he has already had 1.5 adventures with her. And while we couldn't put tenteen into the old clothes it was okay to put 15 in underwear? Wouldn't it have made much more sense to have the weird clothes' thing happen with the mitosis regeneration? (like, I wouldn't have liked that either but it is a little weird how tenteen got a full suit and 15 got the bare minimum)
And I hate how it feels like every part that made the Doctor 13 got erased as quickly as possible. Luckily, there were a few references at least - if no one got me I know the psychic paper got me <3 - and I GET why the fam didn't show up in the puppet show but like, couldn't you have left tenteen the TARDIS interior at least? I am sure Donna would have liked the crystal columns <3
It feels very rtd to have tenteen showered with gifts he can't even want and that are way too much while others are erased or overshadowed by him and get the leftovers.
On a similar note, I was also direly missing post-regeneration haze for both of them. Who knows (well people who have watched the Christmas special, I guess), maybe that's yet to come for 15? But like how are they supposed to function without running about without a clue and passing out every 5s for a day or two?
*German expression, means to be on one's last legs
#anti rtd#<- it isn't only anti rtd because there is a certain tragic to treating the Doctor this way that I can get on board with#and like there wasn't that much time for his arc anyway as he only lived for 2.5 eps#but I still wish the Doctor could have kept something and then moved on on his own accord#like an earring you know? pluck it out of his ear and put it in a pocket for safekeeping#you remember how 13 lost the wedding ring regenerating and that was framed as something to mourn? I bet they never even realised#at least not until much later when they had no clue where it had disappeared to it just got taken from them when they weren't looking#tenteen's whole self is like that ring just that it isn't getting framed that way and hence we don't get to grief and experience the tragic#as what it is#again no time in 3 eps for this sure#but idk it's very tragic to take away from 13 and 15 to give to tenteen in a way that takes aways from tenteen in the end#(maybe rtd was forced to change TARDIS and sonic who knows not gonna yell at him for it but it remains sad and unfortunate)#from the meta pov I am at least glad the TARDIS (and potentially sonic) will come to be 15's that tenteen borrowed since we will see them#together for longer#dw spoilers
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the nero and airi connection is so important it's not just bcs theyre my faves
#sylhea talks maydare#i swear i made a post abt this somewhere but rn im remembering why them meeting and talking was may fav chapter it's so so important#like look theyre both- in a way- 'taken in' by kanon. kanon chose airi to be the saviour while kanon saved nero bcs he's essential#airi got kanon's 'hero' while nero got kanon's 'king'. one of them feared kanon while the other admires him#and yet kanon is their saviour. he took them away from a world that is cruel to them. yet airi and nero have different circumstances#oh my god wait there's more similarities than i thought#both of them were taken just after their important people had died and in a vulnerable state#airi back thwn had a childish (not meant to be /neg) mind while nero in the past was just a child#both are given a responsibility and both accepted them in different ways. while airi was in the delusion she's the 'protagonist' of maydare#nero understood what his purpose and what he's supposed to do. but also both of them wanted something they desire. they wanted 'peace'.#both of them wanted to be in a world where they can live freely. airi wanted to live the most of her delusions while nero wanted to live#the most of his life as a normal student. different but to its core they only wanted peace and be themselves freely.#and in the end both of them understood that they have to act their role in order to achieve that peace in this worl. they know they had to#face forward and fight.#IT'S THIS LONG AND IM NOT EVEN GETTING INTO WHAT MADE ME START THIS 😭 atp their parallels is the main focus here#so all of those and there's more. makia. their connection to makia.#nero is a friend of makia while airi is a friend of kazuha. and the people who knew about makia's past.#i'm guessing nero only knew makia's past life as the scarlet witch and dont know about her other past life#while airi only knew about makia's past as kazuha and didn't know about her being a reincarnation of scarlet witch#nero talking to airi about makia was also very important bcs yes makia already slapped airi into reality and makia was able to do it#bcs not only is she born and raised in maydare she also have memories of the other world. nero who is PURELY from this world and donxt know#about the other world helped airi accept that this IS an actual world. makia ACTUALLY lived in this world and she learned that from nero.#lmao i know that wasnt the intention bcs the intention was nero saying all that so there's proof makia really is the reincarnation of makia#but i'm already this far bro nero who's purely from maydare that came to know of the other world from someone else#and airi who is purely from the other world and isekai'd by someone else to maydare#it's so fascinating#god when this chapter comes to manga im hoping ppl dont immediately ship them#bcs to be honest i dont think airi is interested in men at all and nero is interested in romance in general#plus nero is 16 y/o while airi is 20 y/o so there's that LMAO#it's so insane to me how much damage airi actually had her experiences was actually REALLY traumatic
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Why did my cooking dream get hijacked by my brain making a William Afton oc and au what was that about.
#luly talks#my dreams#I'll peace like i can recollect it was weird#bc it literally was ME BUYING GROCERIES W MY DAD but then the line between when we ended and Michael and William started blurred#i remember the grocery store very well also bc it was very similar to the one i go always to but smaller and more sepia#it was dark for a grocery store like it was just letting sunlight in#pears were half off like some black friday offer so all the products were suuuper cheap#i saw one bottle of milky pear juice for like 1k. and the same w these 4 stacks of frozen waffles who were like 1070.#or this bottle of pear pancake mixture that had 2 or 4 lts#it was kind of when i went away that thr lines started blurring so let me tell you what i remember about this Afton:#he didnt seem. murderous. he was grocery shopping w his kid for fuck's sake 😭 i think he was even sitting somewhere while i ran back and#forth taken aback by these offers? like kinda dismissive at best#uh. Henry was brought up believe it or not. it was like... they broke up or something? like he was kinda upset about the mention but like#in a i dont want to explain why im not with him rn sort of way#very insecure he seemed. like he run into this woman who might've been someone but idk who was whom asked sbout henry and bro was SWEATING#you'd say dream william was a fucking loser he just got locked in thinking like what do i say and HOW do i say it#to make it sound casual but also not weird.#bc on top of all he also seemed to have some weird gender things going on bc he first instinct when trying to explain himself to the woman#(who i cannot stress enough was super friendly like a fucking neighbor or something just going hey hi! hows da family? ^_^)#was to refer to them both as girls as this jokey comradery Let's Ignore The Topic thing before going No That's Bad I Can't Say That#this whole internal monologue in my dream happened in a sort of comic panel thing btw where shit went from these warm browns and greens and#shit from the grocery store to jarring black and whites and reds as William tried to have a straight thought#looks wise unfortunately not a lot going on.though considering this was literally my dream getting turned over can we say my Afton is argie#something something my turn stealing from them etc etc or whatever#uh. brown hair. but not too dark. it was greying and that was making it lighter. also very angular face as you'd expect#high cheekbones pretty eyebrows no facial hair. hair was a bit longuish tho? like a messy ear length maybe?#he had a button up w buttons lose bc it's so hot and humid rn also sunglasses which i know 100% was influenced bc the last design i rbed#a little.before napping#also he had age makes too though his age was most visible in his scrawny long exposed neck#me/mike change was minimal bc we're both pale and brunette hit tag limit so hope y'all like my brain's oc i guess 😭
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my brother and i truly had such different childhoods
#he acts out more#feels entitled to ask them for more#opens up to them#asks them for help#they coddle him#i would be lying if i wasn't jealous. i don't want that taken away from him; i want that for me too#ofc he's jealous of me too. for how they see me as reliable and levelheaded#he has had his own tough times w our parents#but he still sees them as people he can turn to if he is in a tough spot#and at the end of the day he is a cishet youngest male child!!#i am a queer eldest daughter from a conservative religious household...i obviously get less rope#i obviously have to keep them at arm's length because their love for me is conditional. i have to be independent#i cannot be like lot's wife. i cannot turn around. i cannot look back. i cannot fall back
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