#and you shouldn't care about what I or others are doing with the fandom
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anyone-ther3 · 19 hours ago
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I've just been thinking about this so like all those Jaune smut/ship posts are a little weird and I don't really like them. Like firstly he doesn't act like himself at all but I know this fandom i shouldn't have expected that much. But his entire character revolves around how he's such a nice and oblivious person who is always in the worst place to be in the wrong time. He suffers hella imposter syndrome and is a huge failure boy (not derogatory). If a female character literally breathes on screen she's somehow in a ship post with him which is honestly a little impressive.
People often forget about Jaune being the guy who had to cheat to get accepted, and how he always had to get his life saved by Pyyhra, or how he literally didn't know how to sword fight with the sword he had. And his arc shows him over coming those odds, but he's still not the strong, alpha male, fuckboy, y'all think he is.
Also these are probably also the people who had a problem with Bumblebee in volume 9 because "they came out of nowhere and the writers just gave into the shippers". THOSE TWO HAD BEEN PRACTICALLY EDGING THE SHIP SINCE VOLUME 3! Monty wrote gay people. I need to pull up that one Danny Motta clip about this. I could pull up every time they were obviously alluding to them being into women/each other but I don't have the time nor the energy to argue with you.
When people start shipping canonically lesbian characters with a male character it is weird. Now some people argue that because people ship RubyxWeiss it's ok to do it the other way too. Ruby and Weiss aren't confirmed either way, Blake and Yang are. I literally don't care what way you ship them if they're not in a committed(healthy) relationship or haven't been confirmed in canon. Also y'all have never heard of female friends or sisters for some reason. Jaune and Ruby were a sibling dynamic from the get go but whatever I'm not trying to get myself killed. Jaune and Weiss do actually have chemistry, so does OscarxRuby.
Lastly, all of yall have been largely mischaracterizing Jaune because you want him to be a dominant but mostly empty character who you can place yourself in the position of. It's really the same problem as the isekai genre. But Jaune isn't the dominant type who acts like a fuck boy.
Obviously Jaune's the bottom, like he's the one wearing the collar in these scenarios, dumbass.
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genderqueerdykes · 8 hours ago
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okay i’ve been wondering about this for a while. i’ve seen a lot of fandom discourse that headcanoning a character who’s commonly accepted as transfem in fandom as a genderweird trans in all directions nb person is transfem erasure. is this true? i haven’t really thought so‚ but i might just be biased as a nb transmasc myself. (common examples include john egbert)
hello there, thanks for stopping by!
i am definitely the wrong person to ask about this, i am very sorry. i do not participate in fandom at all, i don't engage with much fiction and when i do, i don't get into it that much. my brain doesn't really latch on to fiction like it did when i was a kid. i still play games and watch anime here and there but i don't interact with fandoms, so i apologize for that. i find them to be genuinely uncomfortable and unsafe environments to be in due to being intersex and biracial. fandom spaces unfortunately tend to be extremely racist & intersexist. i had friends who were heavily involved in fandom as a teenager and i felt very unsafe due to the sheer amount of fetishiziation of intersex bodies that goes on in fandom spaces.
this is simply an outsider's perspective, but i don't really see fandoms as "representation" that can be "erased" because it's all conjecture and everyone has such wildly different opinions on what a character is or is not. it's not representation if it's not confirmed. if it's just a headcanon it's not representation, as it was not confirmed and thus is conjecture and speculation. i might be wildly off base as an outsider, but i always kinda thought the point of fandom was for everyone to express how they interact with that piece of media uniquely, and spread and share their thoughts and opinions? why are people trying to control how other people interact with a piece of fiction that they did not make...?
that seems antithetical to the idea of fandom. i thought it was supposed to be a fun hobby? again maybe i just *don't* get it as an outsider, but it makes no sense to me to try to control someone else's internal opinion on something that quite literally is not real. like at the end of the day none of these people are real, you can't hurt their feelings you're not 'erasing' anyone here, they're literally not real, and if it's only a headcanon that that person is transfem... then you're not. erasing. a transfem character, it's just conjecture. it doesn't matter what gender or sexuality you see them as because you're free to think and feel those ways in your head. you're allowed to engage in those thought experiments because that person quite literally is not real so it's okay to speculate on their identity. it's not okay to do this to another live person but if they're fictional who... cares?
this may sound really harsh but i need to stress to people that fictional characters are not real human beings, and stressing out over their genders or sexuality does nothing to help you. you can't hurt their feelings. you can't erase a transfem that isn't confirmed to be transfem. a headcanon is just that: a personal opinion. it shouldn't come to the point where it causes distress and fighting. this is a hobby, it is not one's entire life. i would recommend just blocking and not engaging with people who try to police how you interact with leisure behaviors. i don't think there's one true way to be "Right" about these kinds of things because it's literally all conjecture
also sorry, i have no idea who that character is! i don't know very many fictional characters by name so i can't lend any input there, apologies. for the future, if anyone is curious about my feelings on these sorts of things about other characters, i unfortunately cannot help you as there's a near 100% chance i am not familiar with them and can't lend any input
how can an opinion be right or wrong ... ? that just doesn't make sense to me. it's all opinion. it's not worth hurting other people over or yelling at each other. i'm sorry that i can't give you a more informed opinion, but i thought maybe an outsider's perspective could help somewhat. i hope this is somewhat informative or helpful to you at all- i honestly don't think it's right for people to try to control each others' headcanons because that is quite literally thought policing and i am not here for that. anyway, take care of yourself! thanks for stopping by :)
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dreamwreaver · 3 days ago
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godamnit those fans are also getting pissy about a fanart of Verosika x Charlie on Twitter. Goes to show *any* ship of Charlie that isn't Chaggie is apparently bad and not canon so it shouldn't be made according to these people🙄
they're only proving your point tbh cuz normies are sucking all the fun out of shipping
If you're talking about the one deerly depart did then I just have to laugh. Because 1. It's fabulous art and Gin always does fabulous art. And 2. I mean... have you SEEN some of gin's other stuff? That charosika piece is one of the tamer ones. Also, someone paid for it?
I mean this also happened to another artist just a few months ago. This one was I guess a known ra shipper, or at least known for their ra art rather. They've since come out as a multishipper on bsky and are very nice so I always try to give them a like and a boost where I can. Anyways, someone commissioned them for a charlastor piece and it, was, GORGEOUS! It was a nsfw piece but my god there's no denying the sheer talent. Unfortunately, two assholes felt the need to bully them on bsky about it and the piece was taken down. Thankfully the shipping communities on bsky are actually far more civil because I had actual ra shippers in that person's replies saying the same thing we say, "Block the tags and move on this is pathetic"
It was honestly very refreshing. Those shippers I respect, even if because of the ones I don't their ship gives me visceral squick. Not their fault that toxic people are into the same thing. But back to the Charosika piece, like... it's still gay; they're two hot ladies, what's the big fucking deal? It's not gay enough for them now? Or is it just that they're made that yet again; someone saw the chemistry between two characters who have NEVER interacted instead of the chemisuck that their oh so precious canon ship is? And again, I feel like the anger I tend to let out in the asks gives the impression that I hate chaggie. I don't. I really, truly don't. I hate CANON chaggie, I hate the way that the main fucking couple is so watered down you could air hazbin in Russia essentially all unedited. You couldn't do that with the owl house or Steven universe, and Hazbin is a fucking adult animated cartoon! I hate the fact that chaggie content in the fandom is honestly hard to find because I've run the numbers and more than half the fics tagged chaggie are actually stories about other ships that have Chaggie tagged even though it's just a background pairing at best. I hate that a lot of the people who might like Chaggie well enough on its own but have another otp use it to shit on others even though they're pushing a canon sapphic ship yo the side because "Ooh toxic yaoi!" And infantilize one half of a grown ass adult couple! I hate that Viv is now trying so hard to backpedal on how bad the show fucked them up in the first season by going overkill with the chaggie pda when what's really needed is to either fix the writing in their dynamic or let the fucking relationship end because from a solely writing perspective it feels so, so FORCED. Like Charlie cent let go because it's a comfortable if not perfect relationship and vaggie can't let go because this is the literal person who saved her fucking life and being with her means everything even though doing so strips vaggie of literally all character agency and personality!
Deep breaths, side tangent over. But no, my assessment that normies who know nothing about fan culture and don't care to learn because it's trendy are the reason for the rise of fandom puritainism and the obsession with the "it's canon" part of it. And fucking hell I hope they get over it soon.
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edwardallenpoe · 7 months ago
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Hey. Just wanted to put my two cents in, like everyone else on Tumblr dot com is. (It got pretty long so putting it under a cut)
I don't really care about what you think should happen to the fandom. Like. If you are going to continue to engage in the fandom without giving Neil any sort of gain is fine. I'm personally still on the fence on what the fuck to do now. But let's not make that the whole focus, yeah? What Neil allegedly did was fucking terrible. Like. Objectively worse than what JKR did when things first came out about her. Let's forget good omens and sandman and coraline for a minute (don't care if you still engage with those things or burn your copies and remove your tattoos, let's just put it down for a minute.) and try really hard to think. Because we all hated JKR. We burned her reputation to the ground. For good reason. But we can't even decide if we hate Neil Gaiman yet? Guys. Please. We have to believe all women. Plus he's a rich fucking white dude who has admitted to using his power for gain.
And if it turns out (which this is a 8% chance) that this is all not what it seems to be, or even all of it is fabricated, and Neil is innocent, we still gotta stop worshipping this dude. This has got to be a wakeup call that he's not some Messiah. He's a human dude in power who does the same shitty things human dudes in power do.
And I get it. You want to continue to like your stories that he helped create (key-word 'helped' bc he was a part of a team with a lot of these stories, including Sir Terry Pratchett) but me personally? I would be a massive hypocrite if I metaphorically burned my Harry Potter stories to the ground and put HP fans in my DNI because of JKR but said "separate the art from the artist" with Neil Gaiman.
And this is coming from any other Good Omens fan that became way too attached to the story. Like a lot of people have said that story helped in very. Very fucking trying times. It was my rock, some days the only thing keeping me going. The fandom has been an amazing place of creativity and community and love.
But so was Harry Potter. If you think about it. If any Good Omens fans were previous Harry Potter fans you'll know just how wide spread and open and creative and deep the hp fandom was. And this may just be me misremembering because it was a couple years ago at this point (plus everything with Neil Gaiman is still such news) but because JKR was spouting rhetoric that directly harmed us (us being majority queer and poc people) we drop-kicked hp pretty fast and focused on the artist and her shittiness.
Can we have the same attitude towards Neil? Can we separate the art from the artist long enough to fucking focus on Neil? When I say separate the art from the artist I don't mean "remove artist, continue to enjoy art" I mean "remove the art and focus on the artist, and study that motherfucker". How many video essays are their out about JKR? How many books referencing her terribleness? Without giving so much as a hint to Harry Potter?
Separate the art from the artist and focus on the artist and bringing him to justice. And believe the victims.
And yeah I can see your arguments against the source of the information and who the victims went to tell their stories, I can understand those arguments, but let's look at the data, okay? Let's look at what Scarlett and K actually said with their actual words and their actual messages and separate the source from the material. What Scarlett and K talked about is scary. Terrifying. I couldn't even read more than a little bit before I got triggered. I wasn't caring about how the source podcast was talking about it. What Scarlett and K said with their own words should be enough. Make your own judgements. If you can't look at a story without being influenced by the storyteller's hidden agenda and not have critical thinking skills????? I'm sorry but that's going to be your downfall.
Or better yet, if you can't believe victims because they have political views that differ from your own (which, they probably don't. From what I can tell nobody really fucking knows what Scarlett and K's political views are but it doesn't really matter) you need to really study and look into what you mean when you call yourself a "leftist". Because it's not very progressive or helpful to not believe or help victims because of their political views. Sorry. Is that wild for me to say? Idk
Uh anyways. I don't really care what you do in your free time when it comes to enjoying the fandoms. I don't necessarily think it makes you a terribly shitty person for still engaging in it instead of burning all your Neil Gaiman stories, and also like a lot of people have said (and since I'm on the same boat) treating fans like the scum of the earth when a lot of fans have had good omens as a way to escape and has become super dependent on good omens and are justifiably horrified by everything and trying to ignore it is shitty. But I'm personally going to continue to follow this story because I care about the victims. Not because I want to be guilt-free reading a fanfic about an angel and a demon. Because I care about real life people.
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makiswirl · 8 months ago
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can i just say. and this is probably a niche hill to die on. that i am so gobsmacked every time someone vaguely hints at the idea that jotaro doesn't care meaningfully for the other crusaders, usually particularly kakyoin and joseph, when those two actually tend to be the ones he reacts to being hurt the hardest
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like he cares for his loved ones!!!! that literally plays into his character motives in every single part he shows up in!!! stop lying to me!!!!!!!
#me.txt#jjba#i'm going to ramble in tags actually. excuse me#ok. rereading sdc and so confused at the general perception of jotaro and his friends/family. he's not NEARLY as flat or as dickish#i understand that the anime (particularly the dub) tends to slander him but even then he still clearly cares for them! i'm confused#i also understand that a lot of people dig against jotaro and kakyoin as a dynamic because 'they're popular' and that generally disliking#popular things across media is a thing that i've seen consistently everywhere but the discredit to them simply as a DUO and not even as a#pairing is so..... odd..... like they're considered to be a duo that clicks for a reason. i enjoyed them even before i got into the fandom#every time i see someone say jotaro is overrated/dull i take a shot and assume they're an anime-only or only read the manga like once btw#joseph and jotaro also have a neat dynamic and they obviously both love and care for each other. like they're not going to go around loudly#or anything but literally the entirety of the lovers and the prelude to the dio fight IS jotaro being worked up over joseph getting hurt#equally i don't know if it translates to the anime as much but joseph is VERY complimentary when it comes to jotaro. like he sings his#praises so often and reminds everyone that he's his grandson so frequently (d'arby the gamer is a good example of this). either way it's so#peculiar....... there's not enough avdol and jotaro content btw (also in canon) because jotaro obviously looks up to him and avdol jokes#around with him on the occasion they interact after their intro which doesn't start very well. it's very cute#i do think an important thing to note about jotaro's character is how he acts AFTER his intro because he's so drastically different. early#jotaro and later jotaro aren't the same character and i do not mean this in a character development way. excluding the jail incident he's#completely different and probably shouldn't really be taken into account (especially considering the amount of slapstick in araki's intros)#and i think that's really???? what people center on for his character? Which sucks balls bad!#anyways. i could ramble more about this if asked i have so much to say but sigh. jotaro cares so much for his friends and family he's not a#flat fully cold asshole character regardless of whether you watch the anime or ova or read the manga. you just have poor media literacy#i wouldn't recommend watching solely the anime for his character though. the dub also changes a lot so it's... questionable#i love the anime and it's still important for him though. also adds neat stuff. i need to stop myself. i have many thoughts on the matter#jotaro kujo#joseph joestar#noriaki kakyoin#adding in case anyone sees: i am not saying that he is perfect about this. in fact he is very ass about it with jolyne and holly and that's#very important. he also is in fact an asshole sometimes. NOT as much as you guys are making him though!#please don't get me started on how much of a dick etc people make kakyoin to veer away from the 'woobified' characterizations of him#in fact i think that's bad if not worse because it CLAIMS to be in character. hes a prim asshole at times but not that angry or dishevelled
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winteriron-trash · 6 months ago
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rdj the (whitewashed) electric boogaloo
This is a reminder to everyone who's excited about RDJ's casting as Doctor Doom that this casting is whitewashing. Victor Von Doom is a Romani character and has been a Romani character since his introduction in the 1960s. (Fantastic Four Annual #2 [1964]) Not only that, but his Roma identity and the persecution he and his family faced due to it is integral to his character, it is what forms his identity. (Books of Doom by Ed Brubaker) Even if on the off chance this casting is meant to not be Victor but instead be some variant of Tony or whomever else becoming Doctor Doom, it is damaging to the character to rob him of that important cultural background. Doctor Doom does not exist without that history. Fans have been pushing hard to cast Doom as a Romani actor for years, especially since the MCU has whitewashed other Romani characters. (Wanda, Pietro, etc) This casting is not a celebration moment, it's fucking heartbreaking that the MCU repeatedly ignores the important and nuanced cultural backstories of characters.
I know I can't change anybody's mind on whether or not you want to be excited about RDJ's return to the MCU. But I do think at the very least you should be mad that the MCU is baiting us all and destroying nuanced and interesting characters for the sake of self-referential easter eggs and nostalgia bait. Because that's what it is. Feel how you'd like to feel about RDJ's return, but personally, this is soul-sucking. I had such a deep love for the MCU as a teenager, it was obviously something incredibly formative to me, especially Tony Stark. This isn't recreating what I fell in love with the MCU for. This is turning a well-planned and artistic storyline of adaptations into cheap cash grabs and fan service. Because, I think we're past the point of being able to call the MCU an adaptation of anything. They can use existing characters' names and powers, but to say they're being properly adapted is laughable.
This is not an adaptation of Doctor Doom. This is RDJ the Electric Boogaloo because Marvel's fear of losing the interest of dedicated MCU fans overrides their willingness to tell stories that are genuine to the characters. I don't know what there is to be excited about that. The MCU has lost its authenticity and aside from a few projects, feels heartless. Every movie is a copy of a copy. This announcement isn't something celebratory, it feels like a death knell of a cinematic universe that's so desperate to cling to relevancy it's resorting to nostalgia for a character/actor who hasn't even been dead for a decade. We're not getting anything new, we're just rinsing and repeating the same song and dance.
I get it. I love Tony Stark, his death destroyed me and I to this day, rue the ending he got in Endgame. It misunderstood his arc and it robbed him of a satisfying conclusion. But the solution to that isn't dragging the corpse out of the grave five years later to whitewash an existing character with rich and interesting nuance, just to forcibly tie his existence in the MCU to Tony. Whether he is a variant or not. Why would you want someone else's fave's legacy to be destroyed simply so your fave's legacy can go on? Hell, if we were really all so hellbent on the return of RDJ and/or Tony to the MCU, we have the multiverse for a reason. There were other ways to do it that didn't whitewash and ruin someone else. This just. Isn't something to be happy about.
#... we will not be addressing that i'm a dead blog#no one say a WORD about my inactivity for 4 years this isn't about that /lh#also if anyone tries to get smart about “romani isn't a race” i don't care and you can shut up.#it's an ethnic and cultural identity. and it should be portrayed correctly.#ESPECIALLY for a character like *victor von doom* of all people. like it is fundamental to him.#i would've included panels of the comics mentioned but most of them use the g-slur and i don't wish to encourage that here#like listen i don't think you need to be a comics fan to be an mcu fan. they're so divorced from each other atp#nor do i think the mcu owes complete comic accuracy. but i do think you should at *least* care when characters are whitewashed.#look. i really don't want this to be a debate on if rdj's return is good or not#i've been frankly baffled at how many old mutuals are excited but. whatever if you want him back i get it.#but it shouldn't be like this. not at the expense of a different character.#this whole thing made me realize i'm *far* more jaded and turned off to the mcu than most of you guys are.#which is fair you can still be an mcu fan. if it brings you joy i'm so happy for you#but how does this like. bring joy i don't get it.#this is soulless. it's uninspired. it's done purely for shock value.#i occasionally get asks to this blog about why i left and asking me to come back#and i get it. i *want* to come back.#but i don't *care* about the mcu anymore. this is not the franchise i fell in love with.#i don't recognize what once meant everything to me.#winteriron will always hold a special place in my heart (as will tony stark)#but like. i just don't have love for it. and it sucks that this bullshit from marvel actively kills the love i had.#this sours tony stark to me. i'm sorry but it does. because was it really worth this? is this what his legacy has become?#this does cheapen his legacy btw. like without question. it turns him into a cheap cameo reference. heart of the mcu my ass.#my fandom circles have *massively* changed#i'm now entirely surrounded by comics fans bc my primary fandom is dc comics. that's what i'm up to these days#and the difference was actually baffling to me. everyone i follow now is *pissed* about this. comics twitter is so mad.#and then i see ppl on here excited and i'm just genuinely surprised this is something you want. i don't get it.#i don't say that to be rude. i just don't get it. how is *this* actually something people *want*.#do i still care about marvel? eh.#i like winter soldier comics and i could give a comprehensive rec list. and i read some other characters i deeply enjoy.
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cranberrymoons · 3 months ago
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#i’m putting this down here because i don’t actually really want to talk about it or answer asks about it but i’m like a little annoyed lmao#first of all obviously people should have boundaries and not be annoying/invasive/etc. duh.#i have been around the rpf block many a time and rule 1 is don’t be a weirdo. don't let it out of fandom spaces :)#but yeah idk. oliver stark to me feels like someone who is actually very familiar with the mechanics of fandom warfare#and therefore does not know how to log off when it starts to get personal#like to be clear i definitely do not think he engages directly with This fandom other than to lurk and spy on people for fun/haterism#but in MY opinion he has the energy of a person who spends a nonzero amount of time engaged in petty anonymous beef#over a character or a ship or a sport or a new brand of tofu. idk i don’t really care what he’s into#but it does sort of seem like he forgets that when he’s doing it on his real socials with his real face and real name attached#people are going to know that it’s him and respond accordingly and he should just like. block them and move on.#and maybe even go back to his burner and vague about it or something if he truly cannot just walk away.#which he does seem to be sort of getting slightly better at but it's still just like. yeah man! i don't know what to tell you.#people are weird sometimes. we all get weird anons and dm’s and people cyberbullying us. it sucks and it shouldn't happen but it does.#and you do literally just have to find ways to make it easier to ignore them. i know that you know this#because you are a human who grew up on the same exact internet as the rest of us.#i say; as i feel compelled to post about a tiny situation from like 12 hours ago that has literally nothing to do with me#anyway!!!!!!!#i went into the settings to turn off reblogs and thought how funny would it be if i blazed this post lmao
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double--cross-d · 4 months ago
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#vent#I think the reason I've been so hesitant to share my art or be satisfied with it is because#no one really likes it#I mean I get likes and the occasional comment but the only reblogs I ever get are from myself and one other person#And I get that I'm creating for myself and it's rude to ask people to reblog but#do you know how demotivating it is to see a reblog get more notes than your art?#to see fan works made in under an hour get more attention than stories you've spent months crafting?#God I know I'm fucking evil for wanting just a little attention but I'm just tired#I haven't even posted art of my newest characters because I know nobody would give a shit#I've been stalling on posting a story for a year because I just can't find the motivation because no one would care#I see artists I follow and look up to post their personal stories and get so many notes and asks about it#enough to make their own ask blogs and comics and get fan art#but when I post my own stories I get like 5 notes at max#I'm just so sick of it#Why should I bother showing my art to anyone if no one gives a shit#It'd be better if I just deleted my fucking art blogs because I'm the only one who cares about them at this point#I just want validation that what I'm making isn't complete shit but I'll never get that because no one reblogs anyone that begs#I only have like 3 people to confide in#meanwhile my sister has entire fandoms supporting her projects#I don't know man I don't want to dwell on it but I just can't bring myself to create anymore#my motivation is gone#I shouldn't care this much I know
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kenzan-kiwami · 4 months ago
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would people drag me if i negged the pirate game on main
#i don't actually care that much either way but the implication from many fans that i *should* kind of bothers me#it's not even that i was coping for K3 or JE3 or anything else specific because i knew those weren't going to happen already#i just have zero capacity to care about 'the first solo majima game' at this point in time#certainly not when majima has been playable more times than several other characters#like. yknow. saejima. shinada. tanimura#and ichiban ofc he's only had one solo game and he's literally the new main protagonist of the entire series#like i thought 8 was about passing the torch to the next generation#point being that number of 'solo games' is not a good metric for how much 'content' a character 'gets to' have#truly i do not give a single shit about the game outside of 'i think it should be a historical spin-off or star new characters instead'#i can just not buy or play it. i can save £55 of my gaming budget.#what bothers me is the fan response to it and to folk not being 100% /pos about it because half of you fuckers thought 8 was too convoluted#like i have to reiterate i don't have much to say about the game itself other than 'this isn't for me and that's ok'#but the key is that it *should* be ok and i shouldn't feel like i can't enter certain spaces for fear of being dragged for my apathy#i guess what i should have asked initially is whether it's ok to neg the fandom on main lmao#anyway idk how much i'll post here realistically until the next game announcement i'm probably just gonna keep to my smaller curated spaces#Once Again if anyone wants my discord you need only ask#don't be intimidated i'm definitely more scared of receiving your message than you are of sending it to me#me#text#8 gaiden
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creatingblackcharacters · 4 months ago
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"Calling Out Racists? Help!"
(shout out to the situation sender who's chosen to remain anonymous!)
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NOTE: People of color, if you feel that your efforts would be in vain or cause more pain than it's worth, I fully respect not doing it. I've been there, and tbh I usually don't. But white netizens, I expect boots on the ground. Racism festers when no one does anything about it.
So, it's finally happened! You've come face to face with antiblackness in your fandom space. You never thought it could be this bad! Naturally YOU don't condone this behavior, so you take steps to remove yourself from this person.
However! Your friends and other fans are still happily sharing from someone that you KNOW is capable of this. Would they still be comfortable knowing they're yapping amongst racists? And then you wonder- should I tell everyone about them? I mean, surely everyone should know?
Thus we've come to the decision:
The Callout
In my honest opinion, callouts are morally neutral. When used to reveal consistent harmful beliefs, intentions, and behaviors to other people, usually of marginalized identities, I think they're critical. Our safety and humanity matters far more than someone's internet fame. If I can't stop someone from being a racist, I at least don't want their vitriol on my dash, and I ALSO don't want people thinking I agree! Racism shouldn't be tolerated at all, but unfortunately, many an antiblack racist has a popular following and will not be removed. Anything less overt than a slur like the example above is more often than not, not a dealbreaker for many.
On the other hand, when it is maliciously weaponized to drag someone down on nothing but hearsay and rumor, it can be devastating. It has often been used as retaliation against those very same marginalized peoples to shut down discussions of racism and other forms of bigotry. In my opinion, you should not do these sorts of things when you don't have any solid proof or an actual education on what you're talking about. Period.
I say that all to say, be intentional. Use your discernment and some critical thinking.
How Ice Deals With It
Let's say you see something that concerns you. First, you need to pay attention to if other Black fans have noted this person's behavior. Has it been previously noticed, have they seen dogwhistles you've completely missed? Keep in mind as well, antiblackness does not have to come from a white person. Don't let "I'm brown" fool you.
If you're confident: confront the person on the particular issue you've noticed.
‼️‼️‼️ For the maintenance of your mental health, you CANNOT go into this expecting to change someone's mind and behavior. If you do, 9/10 you will face demoralization. You cannot walk into these thinking they care. Most people don't, and will deny the harm of their behavior. It sucks, but it's the truth. Change your perspective. The only goal you need to have is pointing out the harm done, so that this person loses the excuse to be racist out of "ignorance". Once you've spoken up, ball's now in their court.
Confrontation doesn't have to be negative! It can be as simple as "hey, what you said was not okay, here's why, and I hope that you can learn from this to do better for yourself and for your fans." Simple, to the point.
‼️Keep in mind, from Fans of Color: the private confrontation is a sign that we're trying to give you a chance to do right. Everyone's not going to receive that grace, nor do I expect every fan of color to offer it. It might just be up with you and your racism that day. 🤷🏾‍♀️ I would take the chance if offered.‼️
We're going to go two routes here.
1) It works
If it works, then what should come next is 1) a full acknowledgment of the violence and harm, 2) visible steps to ameliorate that harm, and 3) an apology to those harmed.
It doesn't have to be a complex apology (unless the situation itself was that large). But it has to be genuine and the change needs to be seen.
Very often you'll see apologies for antiblackness... To white fans. You cannot apologize for your actions to people who were not harmed by them, because they are not the ones with the right to accept the apology!!!! It's not a real apology. They've just covered for being exposed, is all. Be willing to hold each other accountable!
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2) It doesn't work
This might still happen after the "it works", btw! Some people genuinely just want the appearance of progressiveness.
Here's where it gets gritty and you'll experience the most discomfort, I'm just being honest:
They might fucking suck!
They might suck, they might make it a point to share with their followers that you suck, and those same followers might also suck! You know how they sound? Like those people who fought for rapist Brock Turner because "he had a good future and this shouldn't ruin it". Yeah.
Recognize that this backlash you may experience from strangers is not coming just from their need to be entertained, but from a realization that if their fave is antiblack and they agree, then THEY are being antiblack too.
That acute pain you're feeling from this effort- you're now feeling a part of the chronic pain that is being a Black fan! And if you're white, you just temporarily sacrificed your whiteness to defend what was right, and now you are seeing a piece what that whiteness shields you from. Idk how else to put it.
Now what?
Well first, this shouldn't make you go "oh well there's no point in fighting racism bc they're so mean." Why do you want to identify with the people who just acted like that lmao. Antiracism is hard, but the right thing isn't always easy. Stand up and dust yourself off, soldier.
Take the steps to protect yourself. That might be a break from socials to decompress. Block people as necessary, use the tag blocker thing.
Recognize that you are not in the wrong for wanting this harm to be accounted for. If this person didn't want to be seen as a willful racist, they should have chosen to do better. They didn't want to, they chose to triple down on their racism, which they are now aware of doing! They just don't care. And that's not within your control. They wanna be a racist, let them be treated like one!
"Curate your space" as they say, and recognize that antiblackness is going to have you potentially removing folks you thought were cool left and right. You might see some people close to you show their true colors. It's time to make some tough personal decisions. I can't walk you through that. But I don't want to be around people who treat antiblackness with apathy, because birds of a feather... 👀
I obviously didn't cover every single scenario here. And this is only *my* way of dealing with these things (if I do at all, anymore). Some folks may go about it differently. But yeah, in summary, go in to point the racism out, and don't let the response determine your self value. 👍🏾
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ohnonotthehorrors · 1 year ago
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You know, if any of the bats are going to kill the Joker: it should probably be Dick or Duke.
Like, I get it. 'Jason kills the Joker' sounds like the most obvious solution. But the thing is: Jason literally does not care about the Joker.
"But he's the man that killed him-" Sure. But that was a While ago. (At least if you ignore all the rebooting of the universe). Sure, Joker is a big symptom of what Jason sees as the problem. Which is: Crime needs to be controlled. Because more than anyone, he knows it won't be stopped. (It especially won't be stopped if no one is allowed to kill the bad guys).
But here's the thing. Jason's arc does not, and Should Not, revolve around Joker at all. Jason's story really never has been about revenge, and he should be Allowed to Move On from this one of the many people that hurt him. This isn't a: 'Oh Jason should learn to forgive and let go and not take revenge' this is a: 'the Joker is pathetic. Killing him just straight up doesn't do anything to Jason's arc or character.'
But Dick? Dick whose TRIED to kill the Joker? Dick who first donned the mask and tights to take revenge? Who wanted to make up for not being there for Jason? Yeah. This is the character that Would benefit from killing the Joker.
The first Robin has been around almost as long as the Joker has (both made in the same year) and it would be nothing more than divine justice for him to finally be the one to end him.
Well that's all well and good, you say. But what about Duke? What does he have to do with this?
You mean other than Duke being Awesome and he deserves to?
Duke's parents were hit by Joker gas. Pretty famously part of his character's back story. Duke has already killed a 'mirage' of Joker in the comics, which I think would be neat foreshadowing.
And think about it. The guy with light powers, the guy that works the day shift, by all means the Proof that Gotham really does care. Really does take things seriously. Why Shouldn't he get to kill off the personification of apathy?
Now the other point, and this is really just a personal vendetta, I would love Love the character that is Constantly ignored (at least by fandom) to kill off DCs 'specialist awful white man.'
The other person who should get to kill the Joker is Barbara Gordon (for self explanatory reasons) except I don't trust any writer to do it.
(She should get to beat that Thing into a white and red Pulp and shred his remains. No 'pull a trigger' no 'hire a swat team.' She gets to do it with her Bare Fists)
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ofstarsandvibranium · 3 months ago
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Pull the Thread
Fandom: Marvel (Mob Boss AU)
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x F!Reader
Summary: You and Bucky used to be so in love and so… ignorant of the roles you had to play, which lead to you breaking up. But that didn’t seem to keep you away from each other since you now act as Bucky’s nurse whenever he gets hurt. Based off my mini fic here.
Warnings: mentions of child death
Stitched Together | Bucky Barnes Masterlist
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When you wake the next morning, Bucky and Sam are gone. Their sleeping areas are made up and a note is left on your kitchen counter.
Thanks again.
See you around.
-B
PS. call me if you ever need anything
Beside it is a cup of coffee and a stack of bills. You count it out and chuckle in disbelief. Bucky left you two hundred dollars for helping him out.
You grab your phone and type in Bucky's number. You insert a picture of the money along with the text:
You: you didn't have to pay me.
Bucky: I wanted to. For disturbing your night and for your work.
You: It's fine, but thanks anyway.
Bucky: Hope you have a good day, sweetheart. :)
You pause. Sweetheart. You can't help the way your heart beats a little faster when you read that word. He used to call you that when you two were dating. It was never "babe" or "honey". Always "sweetheart".
You feel conflicted. You want to scold him for calling you that...but you also really miss being called that by him.
You decide to not respond back at all, since you still need to eat before you head into work.
_____________
Bucky shows up at your place again a few nights later. This time, he's alone and with a bullet graze on his side.
You frown at him as you let him into your apartment, "Is this going to be a habit of yours?"
He snorts, "You think I purposely get hurt just to come and see you?"
You shrug, "I don't know, Buck! We don't really know each other anymore, so I'm not sure what you'd do!" you snap at him. He looks at you with surprise and you sigh, "Sorry. It's been a long day and I wasn't expecting you."
"I can go. I'll-I can find someone else to help me."
"No. You're here already. Might as well get it over with." You gesture to the couch and he sits down as he waits for you to come back with your first aid kit.
Bucky starts to rethink things. It's true that he didn't purposefully get shot at so he can see you. But he definitely didn't hesitate to start heading to your place as soon as things were handled. He just misses you.
You come back with gloves on. You have Bucky take off his shirt so you can fully assess the wound. Just a bullet graze. He lays on his other side as you clean his wound.
Again, you work in silence. You're focused on getting this done quickly and efficiently so you can go to sleep.
As you dress his wound, you say, "You should get some antibiotics or pain relievers so it doesn't get infected or if the pain becomes too much. Change the dressing often. Make sure there's minimal movement."
He nods, "Alright. I can do that."
You help him sit up and pull his shirt back on.
Once he's dressed, Bucky looks up at you, "Maybe you and I could make an arrangement."
You look at him with a cocked brow and he stammers “Not that kind of arrangement! Business! Strict-Strictly business. You take care of me and my people when we get hurt. I pay you for your efforts and we’re out of your hair until the next time.”
"...I don't know, Bucky."
"We'll be discreet. I promise. I'll make sure everyone knows not to blab about you and to only come if it's an absolute emergency."
"I'm sure you can find an actual doctor or something to help you. Why me?"
"Because I trust you."
"Bucky, my dad is the chief of police. You shouldn't trust me."
"I know you wouldn't tell your dad. Because despite how long it's been, I still know you care about me."
You cross your arms over your chest and look at him defensively, "And how do you know that?"
He gives you a cocky grin, "Because you wouldn't have helped me that first night."
"I was doing my civic duty. I'm in the healthcare field. It's my job to help people no matter where they come from."
"Okay. Fine. All I'm saying is that you do good work and I don't want anyone else fixing me and my guys up, but you. And, of course," he pauses to pull out his money clip, picking out a few hundred dollar bills. He holds it out to you, waiting.
You weigh out your options and then take the money. You agree, because, despite what your father tells you and how Bucky treated you in the past, a part of you still loves him and will always love him.
"Alright. I'll do it. Just let me know when you're coming just so I'm not surprised every time there's a knock at my door."
"Will do," he mumbles, grunting as he stands to his feet, "Get some rest. I'm sorry you had a shitty day."
"It-It's fine. I just-" you pause and start feeling choked up. You let out a sob and you lean forward, burying your face into Bucky's shirt.
His arms immediately wrap around you in a protective, comforting hug, "I got you, sweetheart. It's okay. Let it out." His heart breaks when he hears your muffled cries.
"We lost a patient today. He had cancer. He was only eleven," you mumbled into Bucky.
His arms around you tighten, "I'm sorry, sweetheart. That's heartbreaking. But I'm sure you did everything you could to make sure his last moments were good, right?"
You slowly nod and step away from him. You wipe at your eyes, "Shit, sorry. I didn't mean to-"
"It's okay, Y/N. Cry on me whenever you like," he gives you a soft smile, "You gonna be okay?"
"Yeah. I've just been keeping that in all day. Thanks, Bucky."
"No problem. You're a great nurse, Y/N. I just know that those kids are lucky to have you take care of them. I know I am." He kisses your forehead, "'Til next time." He murmurs before heading to the door.
"Hopefully, not any time soon."
He shoots you a grin, "No promises." With a wink, he's out the door. You go over and lock it in place. You lean against it and let out a long sigh. Your heart is beating fast again.
_________________________
It's one of those nights where you dad comes over after a shift and you two have dinner. Neither of you felt like cooking, so you ordered takeout instead. You eat out of the styrofoam containers at your small dining table, pausing in-between bites to chat.
"Work's been okay?" your dad asks before shoveling food into his mouth.
You swallow your food, washing it down with water, "Yeah. We lost a patient earlier this week and I-I can't seem to shake it."
Your dad nods in understanding, "I get it. It's never easy and it never gets easy. And you can't even do anything but continue working after it happens. You gotta push through it. In our line of work, it's important to care for others, but also important to care for yourself too. Got that, bug?"
"I know, dad. Thanks. What about you? You said earlier that work's been super stressful lately?"
Your dad gives an exhausted sigh and leans back in his chair, "Yeah. Been working closely with different units. For years there's been word that the Barnes Family has been the head of several crime operations happening around the city. They've been good about keeping their tracks covered, but since George Barnes' passing, I'm hoping to see his son slip up." Your dad gives a disappointed shake of his head, "Still can't believe you were friends and dated his son."
"He wasn't a bad kid, dad."
"Yeah, up until he started being a prick to you. Good thing you broke things off with him when you did."
You slowly nod, "Yeah. Good thing."
___________________________
You hadn't seen Bucky for two weeks, but he'd been texting you here and there during that time.
He sent you pictures of dogs he'd seen while out and about, would ask about your dad, even ordered food for you when you said you were too tired to eat. It was really sweet and kind of him, but you couldn't help but still have your reservations about Bucky.
Did your heart skip a beat every time you received a message from him? Absolutely. But were you still anticipating on the day he'd turn around on you again? Yup.
You kept things friendly, but also not too friendly. You didn't indulge in anything too personal or detailed. For all you knew, Bucky could be using you to get information about what your dad had on him. As much as you wanted to think Bucky wouldn't do that, you had to keep yourself accountable and aware.
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citrus-moonlight · 3 months ago
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As I often do, I've seen a few posts going around lately lamenting the lack of interaction with fanfiction/fanart here on Tumblr as well as AO3, but after reading a particular comment last night I just need to say this:
If someone tells you that the lack of response to sharing their writing is making them feel so upset that they're thinking of quitting writing altogether, don't tell them that's not a good mindset to have and they should just have fun with it and write for themselves. (have you just tried not being sad? you'll feel so much better!)
Even if you're a writer who felt that way once upon a time but then you changed your mindset so that you don't rely on others' feedback for validation and now you're so much happier, that's not helpful. Because that's obviously not what the person who is feeling sad and defeated is able to do right now, and for most writers/creators that's never going to be possible.
And it shouldn't have to be.
Especially here. Especially fanfiction.
Fanfiction is something that's created because someone loves something and wants to share it with others who love the same thing. And this is specifically a fandom space, somewhere that is supposed to be a community where discussion and dialogue can and is encouraged to happen between the people who write and the people who read. So when there's radio silence when you share something in this kind of space, do you really not see how that would be discouraging?
Because of course I write for myself - I would never get anything down on the page if I didn't - but I share because ultimately I want someone else out there to read what I wrote, and with any luck, to get some joy out of it. But if no one tells me they did, how am I supposed to know? As far as I know I've just been yelling into the void. As far as I know, all that work wasn't worth it.
A metaphor I've seen as an example is that it would be like having someone invite you over and cooking an entire delicious, heartfelt meal, you eat it all without saying anything, and then just leave. Do you not see how that would be upsetting?
We put so much of ourselves into what we write, bits of our hearts and souls and the things that we love and are exploring and are interested in or confused about. It's such a vulnerable thing to share something you've created, so when you tell someone that they shouldn't care if someone else reads what they wrote or tells them that they liked it, you're dismissing a very real and valid experience for so many creators out there.
Because regardless of how slow or fast a writer is, or how big or small their fandom is, it's still hard and takes time and energy and dedication and love - all of it in between our day to day lives from the mundanities to the heartbreaks - to even get something to the point where we're comfortable sharing.
Now, I know that not everyone thinks that writers are silly or selfish or entitled when they ask for feedback. Before I started writing again after many, many years, the main reason I didn't really comment on fics very often wasn't because I didn't think that the authors deserved feedback, it was more that I didn't really think that it would matter. That my comments would just be noted - if read at all - and brushed aside and then they would continue on about their day.
I could not have possible been more wrong. You might think you're just one person and it's just one comment but it's amazing how it can turn a day (or week, or month) around. How it can encourage someone to finish a story, or make a connection they'd been struggling with, or even just manage to add 500 words to a WIP. It is truly incredible to hear that someone loved something I wrote, and if you've ever commented on or reblogged one of my fics, please know that it truly means the world to me.
I've gone through a rough time with all of this lately myself, but I'm doing a bit better now (for the moment), so I just wanted to say this, in part to remind myself when it inevitably gets hard again:
If you're reading this, whether you're a friend or you've never seen me on your dash and never will again: I'm sorry it hurts right now. I'm sorry you feel discouraged and lonely, that it doesn't feel like it's worth it anymore, that you're struggling to find a reason to continue.
But I desperately hope that you keep writing. I hope you keep sharing. You're worth it. I know it's hard, and if you don't want to and you're just tired of the cycle of giving so much of yourself and getting so little in return, I understand that, too. It's ok to be in your feelings about it, it's ok to feel drained by it, and even though knowing you're not alone in your experience doesn't change anything and it still sucks, it's normal and valid and there's nothing wrong with you feeling the way that you do.
But I hope that you are able to find the joy in it again, because you deserve it. ❤️
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madlori · 4 months ago
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Ok my fam, I think we all need a lil Come to Jesus moment. So let's talk about it.
"I'm disappointed Tommy wasn't in 8x02 and 8x03." That's ok! We'd all like to see him, and see our boys together. Going by precedent, we can probably expect to see him in 6-8 episodes this season (it could be more - Taylor had 13 episodes in season 5 - but we shouldn't count on it) and we've already burned one. I'd prefer not to have half of them during the opening disaster when SO MUCH ELSE is going on. I'd rather him appear in episodes when he's got a storyline with Buck, or even on his own, and especially at the midseason break or the end of the season when Relationship Events are more likely to happen.
"But the 217 engine!" I know. But as we sometimes like to say to other fans - we kind of baited ourselves with that. It was suggestive, sure. But the fact that production has MADE a 217 engine is also suggestive that we may see it again later, and they just put it in the hangar scene because they already had it and they had to fill up that hangar with as many vehicles as possible.
"An airplane disaster without using the pilot??" As others have pointed out, Tommy's not a jet pilot. And don't let anybody make you think you were nuts for thinking it was possible. It was definitely a reasonable theory, with supporting evidence, that he might be involved, but in the end, the big opening disaster is always going to be about our mains. As it should be. And honestly? It was great.
"But the whole point of bringing him back was to integrate him with the 118 more!" I'm sure that's still a goal they have, but it's probably easier said than done. Not just from a writing standpoint, but a contractual one, in that there's a limit to how often they can use him, so they have to pick and choose where.
"It's like they don't care about this relationship as much as we do." You're right. NOBODY will care about it as much as we do. They care about the main characters, about the show's actual premise (i.e. first responders encountering wild situations, secondarily the characters' personal lives). There is no universe in which ANY relationship in the show will be prioritized as much as we, the fandom, would like it to be. That's just life in the big city. But they do care, oh boy, they do. Enough to use BT scenes in off-season promo. Enough to write Tommy into a scene in the opening episode where, frankly, he didn't NEED to be. Also, consider this - to shoot that scene, Lou was probably on set a grand total of one day, MAYBE two. And they made sure to include him in the jokey "bee pickup lines" reel. You know what other relationship we haven't seen much? Buddie. They have not appeared together outside of work (and honestly, barely AT work either) except in the birthday party scene, and hey, did you notice that they do not interact at ALL in that scene? Buck spends that entire scene interacting only with Tommy. And that's a friendship featuring two mains that we know they value. That's not indicative of anything except the sheer scarcity of screentime.
"They should be promoting the queer relationship!" Should they? They've never really done that before, with the several pre-existing queer relationships. I have always sort of appreciated that they have not hung a neon sign on Buck and Tommy saying LOOK AT OUR NEW QUEER PAIRING. It's never gotten the Very Special Episode treatment - Buck never had gay panic, or much coming-out drama - and I like that. I like treating it no differently than other romantic pairings on the show. And they did actually promote it quite a bit when it happened. Now it would just feel kinda performative to me.
"Will he be in [whatever episode]?" Imma gently suggest we not do this every week. He'll be there or he won't. There'll be some we know he's in (I think 8x06 is a lock), some we won't know and will be pleasantly surprised, or unpleasantly surprised. I'd say odds for 8x04 are...20%, rising to at least 50% with 8x05 and 100% for 8x06.
And if you ever feel sad about it - go look at a still of Buck from any episode so far this season, and say to yourself, "This man is having heaps of amazing sex with his hot pilot boyfriend on the regular. Canonically."
I know a lot of us have encountered some pretty irritating gloating from people who hate this relationship (in a frankly weirdly obsessive way) about him being not there. Just remember - that's all they have to gloat about. The only "victory" they can claim is the absence of a character? Lame. And it's not even a victory, it's just the cost of doing business when your ship involves a recurring character. Sit back and enjoy your canon relationship between two men who've actually kissed on screen and ignore it. We can be generous about it.
So let's not talk ourselves off the deep end, shall we? I'd like to keep being a reasonable fandom.
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olderthannetfic · 2 months ago
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I am a writer myself and I was reading fic deleting discourse in your blog, and it rubbed me the wrong way each time people explained why you shouldn't delete your focs from ao3.
After the last post, I finally put my finger on it. There is a fandom consensus that we should write for themselves, that's kind of a faux pas to say that you write for feedback. You should do what you want and don't care what other people think.
In the same time when it's about deleting fics, you suddenly shouldn't act like you wrote this fic for yourself and can do with it whatever you want.
--
"Write for yourself" means "Write to your own taste and your work will find the audience of like-minded people." It's about not pandering to some hypothetical audience you haven't even seen and not being obsessed with getting the widest audience possible.
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hannahhook7744 · 4 months ago
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Why Franklin and Maryann Portman are the Worst™ (Part 1)!;
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I want to preface this by saying that I know that by no means Franklin and Maryann Portman are the actual worst parents in fiction or in this series even. 
Of course they aren't. 
But that doesn't mean that I can't still refer to them as the worst™ for them being shitty. Even if I do believe that on some leave that they do care about/love their son. 
I also wanna point out that it's been awhile since I read the books so I'm going off my memory and the wiki for this. So I may forget some context of why this or that happens, and if I do that, feel free to comment it down below respectfully. And if I forget something that you find shitty that they did, also feel free to reblog or comment it down below because I would love to talk about these characters and fandom more.
Am I saying that Abe Portman is 100% perfect and did nothing wrong whatsoever? No, that would go against how his character is betrayed in the books—as a flawed traumatized man who did his best to be there for his family and keep them and himself (as well as others) safe and went about some things the wrong way. 
 Now that that's out of the way…
According to the wiki:
“Jacob was born on Halloween, and up until he was eight years old was convinced by his parents that trick-or-treating candy was birthday presents (something apparently revealed in Hollow City).” 
These people are rich. 
R-I-C-H. 
Rich enough that Jacob’s dad can study birds and volunteer and write mine books that he never publishes without the worry of them not having anything to eat. 
R-I-C-H enough that Jacob comments that “I did love her, of course, but mostly because loving your mom is mandatory, not because she was someone I think I'd like very much if I met her walking down the street. Which she wouldn't be, anyway; walking is for poor people.” And rich enough that they gave their kid their four year old sundan so that they could get a brand new car. 
And for eight years, they had their son believing that candy was a birthday present. 
1. Now, look. I get it. Birthday shopping is hard, especially for a little itty bitty kid but not actually having the money to buy your only kid gifts and choosing not to because people are handing out candy on that day anyway? That's not a very nice thing to do for that long. 
They let him go through three years of school thinking that and we never learned how he found out that was a lie. That's not even including the fact that the rest of their extended family let this lie continue (assuming they knew). 
Can you imagine if Jacob found out because he mentioned this to his classmates or a teacher? Maybe a teacher or family member could salvage the situation but little kids can be brutal, especially towards other little kids who they think are wrong and considering we know that in that same year, Jacob was pants-ed causing him to stop believing anything Abe said…. It's not entirely out of the realm of possibility tl believe that one of Jacob's classmates got in a fight with him over it and caused some kind of embarrassing, painful memory. 
Though I guess it's a good thing they didn't get Jacob birthday presents that early on considering my second point. 
2. The birthday scene. 
Look at his birthday scene. 
This scene? Shouldn't really exist. 
Not because I hate birthday scenes but because Jacob literally told his parents he didn't want a party which under normal circumstances is a reasonable ask within itself. But these? These aren't even normal circumstances. 
Jacob doesn't want a party because the one person he'd actually want there, in his own words, is his grandpa. His grandpa who died in his arms nine months before and who Jacob has been viciously mourning for said nine months. His grandpa whose death caused Jacob's ‘mental breakdown’. 
Whose house they had also cleaned out recently, doing shit all for the now sixteen year old’s mental health and grief. 
But what do his parents do? 
Throw him a surprise party.
A surprise party.
For their jumpy traumatized son who found his grandpa bleeding out in the dark after getting attacked by a monster (or ‘rabid dogs’) and who has been sleeping in the fucking laundry room. 
Why on earth would going against his wishes be good for him? He said he didn't want a party and under these circumstances, it's even more understandable. If you really want your son to socialize or to celebrate, then get him a cake or some food he likes and invite his friend over. Talk to him. 
Don't throw him a party he doesn't want and don't throw the kid who's been having non-stop nightmares about the monsters who killed his grandfather a fucking surprise party. 
To make matters, in this party:
One of his uncles he’s not close to tries to spring a summer trip to his house on him, listing shit that he likely knows Jacob doesn't like with no previous warning to the kid himself (his parents were just planning to ship him off, whether he wanted it or not). 
They're calling Jacob's apparent disorder ‘his thing’. 
And nobody is actually getting him anything he wants. Just shit they've been gifted and are trying to get rid of. 
Gifts like CD's of country Christmas music or subscriptions to Field and Stream (because his Uncle Les thinks he's outdoorsy, this one I can understand slightly since Jacob did want to be an adventurer but still). 
The only exceptions being:
 1. The key to the family four-year-old sedan, which Jacob is embarrassed to be receiving in front of Ricky (who Jacob hasn't talked to in a long while after a fight they had). 
And 
2. A camera Jacob had been wanting for ages (since last summer) from his parents….who likely only gifted it to him because of his dad's new book.
Which leads to his mom drunkeningly making front of her husband at her sixteen year old’s birthday party…. Real classy. 
Oh and 3. A book that belonged to Abe that Jacob's parental Aunt Susie snagged trom the house when they were cleaning it out. A book titled “The Selected Works of Ralph Waldo Emerson”. 
She gave this to him, saying it was from Abe because he'd written Jacob's name in it. 
Thoughtful right? 
Well everyone else doesn't think so because they go quiet. Jacob's mom, Maryann even while drunk, tries to say it was thoughtful and that she didn't know Abe was a reader.
Meanwhile Jacob's dad, Franklin, is barely hiding how pissed he is. 
Like dude. 
Dude. 
Do you really hate your own dad so much that you don't want your grieving son to have even just a book of poems that the only member of the family who he was close to left for him? Are you still, even after that disastrous day where you cleaned out the fucking house with him there and fought with him, refusing to let him have any ties left?
To be fair, you can say that this is because of his own history with Abe and that it's because Jacob is in a worrying state. But that doesn't really hold up considering that they let Abe babysit Jacob often and fill his head up with stories they thought he embellished  due to his own trauma and because they thought that Jacob was well enough to handle trashing and donating all of his dead grandpa’s stuff. 
Sure, they don't take the book from him but the fact Franklin can't even hide how pissed he is is shitty. 
That's not even considering this little tidbit here:
“My mother leaned toward me and in a tense whisper asked if I needed a drink of water, which was mom-speak for keep it together, people are staring.”
….
Do I even need to say anything?
The fact that Jacob thinks this probably means that his parents—or even just Maryann—have said this to him before. Frequently so, even. To the point where he's trying to escape the room, feeling like he might cry, and instead of thinking that his parents (or anyone in this family) might be able to potentially comfort him in this hard moment, this is what he's thinking. 
It's infuriating.
But not as infuriating as my last point for now!
3. Franklin sent his then fifteen year old son to deal with what he thought was his dementia ridden, war world 2 veteran father having a PTSD attack/episode. 
Franklin gets called when he's volunteering at a bird rescue in what is either early afternoon or night by his worried fifteen year old said who tells him that Abe called him ‘flipping out’. 
He asks if he's taken his pills today and Jacob tells him Abe wouldn't tell him. 
At this point, any reasonable adult would go and help their poor ailing father who may be having an episode or PTSD attack about the war, what happened to his family. The monsters. 
At this point, any reasonable adult would send their son home out of danger and call up a friend or sibling or in-law to go deal with the situation. 
What does Franklin do?
He sends his fifteen year old, who is at his job, to go check on Abe. Who again, Franklin thinks is having an episode. 
Now, even if there was a chance that Abe would still recognize Jacob and wouldn't be a danger to him, who would risk sending their son to check on an ailing relative by himself when there's every chance that when Jacob gets there he'll be having flashbacks to the horrors he witnessed. I mean, it's understandable if you or another adult is there and need help calming the man for you to maybe have your teenage son there. Especially if he may be caring for him one day out of choice.
But sending your fifteen year old there by himself to handle the situation when he probably won't know what to do and when he probably hasn't seen one before?
And doing that when you know that your dad was in a war and still has a sea of weapons hidden away behind lock and key (a key which you have) because you can't be half assed to tell the shelter your volunteering at that there's a family emergency?
Franklin literally sent Jacob into a traumatizing situation that could turn dangerous (for Abe or Jacob, if Abe didn't recognize his grandson) under the assumption that all of his paranoid dad's weapons are stored away. 
And what did Abe die with in his hand?
A box cutter. 
Which just proves that Abe had things lying around that he could use as a weapon if needed. Things he could improvise with. 
Just think for a moment about what could have wrong if Abe wasn't actually in danger from a wight but something he was actually imagining—a memory from his past. Imagine what could have happened to Jacob if Abe had mistaken him for a burglar or a wight or what Franklin thought he was imagining.
Jacob can't fight. 
It's dark. 
Things could easily go wrong.
And what would happen if they did?
Jacob would be hurt and traumatized or dead and Abe would likely be in a horrible place if he wasn't, all because Franklin didn't care enough about his dad to go check on him himself. Hell you can he didn't even care about Jacob enough here, because he didn't care about what Jacob could possibly see if he sent him to deal with his grandfather.
Like, not only is he being incredibly shitty to his son but to his own ailing father who was at the very least convinced he was in danger and who was actually in danger (for all Franklin knew his dad could have actually heard someone breaking in but he didn't even take the time to think about it). 
That's all I have time to write for today but there's several other things that they do that are pretty crappy where their son is involved that I will happily discuss.
Hope this doesn't disappoint, @kallmeweirdhprroe .
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