#and yet I can’t shut up

[neutron-stars-collision]

Sometimes I feel like I’m the only person on the internet that’s not panicking about Luke not having anything booked (aside from series 4). I want the best for him but give it time. Let the man rest if he wants to. It’s that simple

[ioveiy]

don’t get me wrong i LOVE how soft tommy is with buck because let’s be real our boy has been THROUGH it and deserves to be cherished, but my GOD tommy could DESTROY this man and it would be the hottest thing ever

[autistic-katara]

does it annoy tf out of anyone else that when a character says smthn like: “i’m not in love with [a male character], i was in love with [female character], it took me a while to accept and i’m incredibly scared telling you please don’t tell anyone” people immediately go “ah yes, canon lesbian, i don’t know how u can’t pick up on that”

meanwhile when a character says smthn like: “i’ve tried for years to force myself into a romantic relationship, thought it would ‘fix me’. but i realise now that’s not how it works, a romantic relationship won’t fix me and i honestly don’t think i was attracted to any of the people i tried to date, im going to swear of romantic relationships for life bcz i don’t experience romantic attraction, later guys ily platonically” 99% of the fans go “oh, ok. so they’re probably asexual but it’s definitely up to interpretation. wtf is ‘a romantic’, yeah they’re a romantic; in a romantic relationship with their ‘best friend’ who i ship them with and is basically canon. very homophobic of the author to make them explicitly state that they weren’t into them like that. they must hate gay people despite the rest of the queer characters in here…”

[vampire-nyx]

Honestly really disappointing and upsetting that just after I found the pills that make you green comics the creator turned out to very much extremely hate people like me

[rickybaby]

Daniel on Ted’s Notebook | Testing Day 3 | pt.2

“[Lando] is normally pretty honest. So if he’s feeling a little down, maybe they expected to be a little quicker […] but for now, we’re hopefully a Q3 or top 10 car but to be much more than that, I think that’s probably getting too excited 😁😁😁”

[itspileofgoodthings]

also I had a breakthrough today that I had in fact overthought a Specific Problem to Death and that I had created a monster in my own mind and that’s why it felt like I was being eaten alive every time I tried to solve it.

[thatweirdtranny]

lmao that person is still talking about me

[isdalinarhot]

YES my stomach sticks out past my boobs YES this is great for my dysphoria because it allows me to pretend my full blown tits are just extra juicy moobs yes god loves me by making me big and huge and large and fat <3 I love you My Body once I go on T I will love you even more <3 <3 <3

[apostaterevolutionary]

You know what would be really funny, is if people came together to have an anti-crab day. A day where every user who joined prior to automattic’s acquisition logged off for 24 hours to show that yes, actually, older user retention is important and you should listen us just as much as new users

The users giveth, the users taketh away

[kyluxtrashpit]

So I really want to get another cat. Thing is, there’s several reasons why it’d be a good idea (boy has a playmate, I think my ideal number of cats is 2, and give a kitty in need of a home a nice one) but also a lot of reasons I know it’s not a good idea *right now*

First reason is I’m not sure I’m fully ready for it. There’s still a part of my brain that hopes that this new new cat (I’m gonna need another system when I do get one lmao) would act more like old cat and I’ve had enough pets to know that’s a red flag that means you’re not ready yet. It just leads to disappointment when your new pet doesn’t behave like the old one when they were never going to, every animal is a unique individual and no two will give the same experience even when they are similar. And I know this. But the heart still wants

Also two cats, especially when one is brand new to the living situation and is still adjusting, is more work than one and for several reasons my energy lately has been pretty low. So. Am I up for that right now? I’m not sure. I’m sure I could rise the occasion if it’s needed, but like. Would it be a good idea to put myself into that situation at the moment? I’m not sure it would be. Even if I do miss having two cats a lot

There’s also the matter of living situation. Last year I was hoping to move, as I’m getting to the point in my life where it is time to Purchase a living space instead of rent. Which is terrifying tbh lmao, but it is a thing none the less. Plus I just really want a bit more space at this point, and certain conveniences (oh how I long for my own laundry devices) that I don’t currently have. But with old cat, that just didn’t end up being in the cards cause my babies are always my priority above all else (the financial hit also didn’t help - I’m only just recovering from it now). I was simply not going to move while she was old and fragile and dying of cancer

However, my province also sucks! And it recently decided it’s gonna suck even more! Not as much as most of the US, at least not yet, but. It’s not promising. And the long term prospects are also Not Great (both in terms of social things and economically as well like, things are probably going to get worse long before they get better, if they ever do get better). And my city isn’t *the worst* but it’s more expensive than ideal. So it’s like. Do I want to buy a place here? I don’t know. But do I want to move out of this province? I also don’t know

Cause moving adds a lot of factors, even if I stay in the same province but look at a cheaper city. And leaving the province, okay, which to go to? This one’s nice but expensive and has weather I don’t like, and that ones cheap but also there’s a decent risk things will get worse there politically. And then there’s a risk the whole country will get fucked politically next year but I am doing my utmost to not worry about it until it is actually an immediate problem

And then there’s factors like, all the people I know are here (even if I’m bad at seeing them a lot). Familiar grocery stores and restaurants, other amenities, hell, my internet company is not fully national last I checked - will I have to switch providers? Work isn’t an issue as I work from home and we have people in multiple provinces, but like. Literally everything else is. I’ve lived here my entire life. I don’t know what it would be like to move that far. I’ve never done it

(And there’s also like. A sort of political responsibility. I read a lot after the shitty thing was announced and like. Some people are leaving. Some are staying because fuck you, bigots will not drive me from me home, I will fight back. Some are staying because they can’t afford to leave. And some are staying because if everyone who can leave does leave, then who’s left to at least try to fight this shit for those at risk who can’t get out? Especially as while I’m not in the demographic currently at risk, I’m in an adjacent one so it’s like. No, I’m not at risk yet but it’s possible I will be some day, but I also do feel some level of responsibility to try to help those who are currently at risk because I’m not)

And my dad is planning to leave (though unclear how firm that plan is right now and unclear exactly where) and is like ‘well come with me’ and I’m gonna be honest I. Don’t really want to like. I’m in my 30s. There is a part of me that feels like it’s time to get a bit more space from my family. My mom moved already for other reasons, so I don’t physically see her often, but technology is a thing so. Quite frankly my parents are both really bad at having friends so being literally the only person one of them knows in an entire city is kind of a nightmare scenario for me lmao. I need my space. I get annoyed when I get texted too often, I am NOT going to be your sole social contact. And I know that’s what would happen if we both moved to the same place with no one else. And even without all that, we have differences of opinions in “ideal place to live” so. I know they’re (dad goes by they/them) going to try to pressure me but if I’m sure of anything, it’s that I don’t want that

And, to circle this all back, there is also my kitty boy: he does NOT travel well. At all. He has panic attacks in the car that leave him panting and screaming within about 1 minute of being in there. We are trying to work on it, given transport is important for vet visits, but progress is slow. I was thinking he might have to get the old gaba just for me to be able to move within the city. He’s an anxious little guy. It’s gonna be tough for him, both the general realities of moving and the driving to the new place part. And I originally wasn’t really thinking of moving anywhere out of a 20 min or so radius of where I currently live partly for that reason

So to move to another province (and please remember Canada is Huge, like, this would be several hours or even multiple days of driving), I don’t know if I can even do that in a way that’s safe for him. Drugs are an option, but depending on where, it could be an unfeasibly long drive to do that with. And god, planes, I can only imagine how much worse he would be on a plane (even though I’d NEVER let him ride in the cargo, I’d buy an extra seat if I had to). He could have a stress-induced heart attack and die and if this is in transit, I’d be powerless to save him and I’d have to live the rest of my life knowing I killed him

And so with all of that, I’m like. I really can’t get another cat until I know wtf I’m doing and implement that because it would be awful for the new kitty if I got them and then immediately moved somewhere, either close or far. I can’t do that, it would be cruel. So like. Idk, I just don’t know what to do

I’m also aware that like. There are two problems in this ramble and the one I opened with is not really the larger one lmao but like. Genuinely I do not know what to do and that’s scary so I’m just kinda frozen here thinking how nice it would be to have a second floof gallivanting around the apartment but also knowing I can’t really have that right now (unless the cat distribution system decides to give me no choice in the matter lmao but I’m not expecting that to happen)

[swordmaid]

was taking screencaps of shri’iia and astarion making out in the sewers like the little rats they are and I just caught shri’iia’s shy smile…..omg……what if I ended it all….

[hahskeleton]

i have decided that after i finish Martin’s design page i must make a new meet the artist thing because i want to

[quietwingsinthesky]

what if. Amy “fix-it” because hallucifer makes sam so paranoid about dean leaving for no reason that sam gives in and follows him and is witness to the whole thing

[yellobb]

If things could stop going in exactly the wrong wrong direction that would be excellent

[professionaljester]

i would love to be able to actually sleep

[aeolianblues]

Amatonormativity is relatively easy to live with until you’re like 25. Any other aspec folks constantly on the verge of worrying they’ll be ‘found out’ to be a faulty human being, failing those ‘basic, normal’ life milestones?

In a keep reading bc I can’t use more than 30 tags but I gotta yap at 4 AM:

in tags bc she sometimes reads my blog + it’s not really my story to share but I spent2 hours on call consoling my best friend. Her bf broke up with her— she blames herself. She was willing to essentially try and solve her boy’s depression bc she thought he was the one. It broke her heart that he didn’t want to go through that along with her (put her through that). And she says I’m unlovable; I’ll never find a partner; I’ll die alone; I wish I was different. And… this is one of my favourite people in the world. There’s nothing I can do to help. All I can do is offer comforting one liners about being enough— I will never experience that. All this while I want to say something from wisdom; from experience

I am very out to her— probs like the second ever person to know I was ace when I found out. And I feel like a fraud. I will never feel like someone is The One. I float on unanchored. It’s funny how the expectation of a shared human experience can push you back into a transparent closet. You can see me in there. You know what’s inside. And yet I’m in a closet again.

rest in tags bc it’s now under 30 I imagine