#and yes it still infuriates me to this day because if you want to write this creepypasta in a remotely good way just. they just cant be

[silverselfshippingchaos]

I fucking HATE how the fandom treats m.ine. it's so bad 😭

[earthtooz]

x : TO LOVE, TO CHANGE: *+ﾟ

in which: you tell veritas you love him. he gets upset with you.

warnings: contrary to what the synopsis implies, it's fluff, i promise. 1k words, first time saying ily, slightly cranky reader, no mentions of reader's gender, dr. ratio being so in love he becomes so soppy and lovestruck. confessions.

a/n: there's a phenomenon that happens whenever i write for dr. ratio, and it's that my heart literally lunges out of my chest and begins typing at the keyboard for me. i should get it checked out. anyways, this is to preemptively celebrate his release!!

“Why- why are you mad?” You exclaim, watching the way Veritas crosses his arms and pouts with the petulance of a child. His gaze has strayed away from your eyes, and all you can do is sit in his lap with your arms hanging at your sides, brain tirelessly racking for all the reasons that you could have angered him.

He doesn’t give you any clues, displeasure brewing in his eyes instead.

“Is it because I said ‘I love you’?”

The purple haired scoffs and sticks up his nose, hair bouncing with his actions whilst you jostle slightly on his legs from the quick action. As much as you love his side profile, you’d love it even more if he spoke to you about what is bothering him.

During this moment, the world stills. You think he’s genuinely mad, and Dr. Ratio’s fury-driven state is not something you should take lightly. Really, you’ve seen it multiple times, and though it has never been directed at you, you hope it never will be. Which is why you sit on his lap now, tensely anticipating his response, and for the answer as to what you did wrong. 

“I was meant to say it first,” he grumbles, losing the arrogance that fills his tone whenever he speaks, air filling with sincerity. 

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me. I was meant to be the one to say ‘I love you’ first.”

Your confusion is tangible at this point. Audible, if you will, because it rings like cicada sing. “Are you being serious?”

“Deadly.”

“You- why, then couldn’t you just have said it?” You sputter, slapping his defined deltoid, concern slowly melting into frustration. “Need I remind you that it was me who confessed to you first as well?”

“Yes, and it was positively the best day of my life.” He says that like it’s a simple fact. No sentiment, no heartfelt declaration, just another logical statement straight from a textbook of his life.

They say to be loved is to be changed, but no matter how much you love Veritas, all he knows is how to be an astronomical pain in your ass. Does he know how scared you were for his answer? You thought you did something unforgivable, or that he didn’t love you enough to respond in kind, or worst of all, that he wanted nothing to do with you anymore?

However, he's acting petty because he was not the first one to say those three words? You frankly don’t know why your heart beats for him as strongly as it does. In fact, you want to whack him over the head with his own codex.  

Placing your hands firmly on his shoulders, you shuffle out of your position from his lap, planting your feet onto the ground. “Oh, you are so infuriating! Pretend I never said anything, I’m going back to my office until you-”

Not even two steps away from him and a hand clasps around your wrist to drag you back to where you started: on Dr. Ratio’s lap. His arms come to wrap around you like chains, leaving no room to wrestle him out.

“I never said you could leave. Especially not after telling me you love me,” he grumbles lowly into your collarbone, breath tickling your skin.

“I’m starting to regret it.” 

“Can’t you at least say it again?”

“I don’t want to,” you grumble, arms snaking up to rest around his shoulders. “You don’t deserve it.” 

“Well, that’s a little harsh. Is this how you treat the ones you love?”

“You haven’t even said anything back,” you pinch his skin. “Talk about harsh.”

“Do you remember the first time we met?” he asks with a fond chuckle, not missing the opportunity to leave kisses in a trail along your skin, making his way up your neck. Then, when his eyes meet yours, you almost crumble in embarrassment at the memory he’s injected into your mind. 

You push him away and raise a hand to shield your eyes from him, clearly reliving a haunting memory. “Please don’t remind me.” 

“Y’know, it’s not everyday someone gets to scold me and be right. If you weren’t so beautiful, I wouldn’t have let it slide, but it’s not everyday a gorgeous genius falls into my lap with guts to challenge me.”

“I was… agitated that day, so stop talking about it, please. In fact, for my sake, please just forget that moment. Completely.”

“Forget about it? Completely?” The scholar asks with genuine shock lacing his tone. “I fell in love with you in that very moment, how can you expect me to stop talking about it? You rendered me a fool in love and expect me to not think about the very moment it happened? Sweetheart, it was a pivotal moment of my life!” 

“Not pivotal enough if you can’t even say ‘I love you, too’.”

“On the contrary, I have loved you longer. I yearned for you in wakefulness and in my dreams. I wished for you to look my way, and when you did, I never wanted your eyes to stray from me. How heartbreaking it was when they did.” His hand has snuck under your shirt now to rub circles on your skin. If he detached from you, he fears you’d slip away from him, and the worst thing you can give him is space. “Do you know how it felt chasing after you because you were the only one out of my reach? For three years, the only thing I wanted was to be yours. You made me an idiot.”

Stunned by his confession and the weight of it, you let him continue, sharp tongue softening. The only motivation you offer is a hand coming to cup his cheek, tucking aside his bangs so you can see his expression in its entirety. 

His gold eyes shine when they look back up at you. For the first time, you feel like you’re seeing the parts of him that Veritas hides from everyone else. 

“I love you.” He continues with heart wrenching devotion. “I’ll continue loving you until the streams stop, the rivers freeze, and the oceans dry. With three hundred thousand, eighty-three thousand, five hundred and seventy-one discovered planets in the cosmos, that phenomenon will approximately take-”

You seal his lips with yours in a gentle kiss, cradling his jaw and swallowing his words. Like wax to fire, Veritas sinks into you, completely helpless against your affections. 

But, oh, you love him, and nothing else in the entire universe matters.

© EARTHTOOZ 2024, do not steal, translate, repost my fics and do not recommend my fics onto any other site.

[sobredunia]

Oh boy.

[disneyprincemuke]

5 times * mv1

there are five times max almost caught himself saying he loves you, and then there's the time that he finally let you know

pairings: max verstappen x horner's niece!reader

warnings: i... don't know?

notes: yes, i'm making a comeback because i've gotten back into the mood of writing (i'm single) and because f1 has got me screaming, crying and throwing up. also, this took me 3 days to write, and i have grown attached. lmk if you guys want the counterpart (basically the same concept, but it's from your eyes???)

one.

"fucking," max cuts himself off, grabbing the closest thing to him. lucky for him, and his team, it's just his racing gloves, "bitch!"

it's just so infuriating to be so close to that podium. he crashed with 5 laps left of the race. his left rear decided to fail him stupidly near the end, after he'd poured his heart and soul to get on that podium. but here he is, moping in his driver's room.

after constantly being in the scrutiny of the public, especially with the way he handled losing, he'd resided here immediately. there's a bubbling anger rising up from him. he's so infuriated.

until a soft knock lands on his door. snapping him out of his thoughts, he knew what he wanted this time. "please leave me alone."

"okay. but christian just wants to know if you're alright." your voice sounds small. he could barely hear you with the door in the way.

he takes a deep breath, then walks over to the door. it reveals you with a hesitant smile on your face.

but he's always had a soft spot for you. all of the anger he'd been feeling merely 5 seconds ago dissipated. "oh. you're not in my room at the circuit often."

"i know. i'm sorry to intrude." you look down at the ground, your often confident self absolutely nowhere to be seen. "christian sent me to check in on you. i'll leave you alone, but i can't go back without an answer."

for starters, you're not a stranger to the signature max verstappen temper. but never has he directed it at you once. it's surely raised the eyebrows of christian horner the first time it happened when you joined the team.

one second he was all over the garage, only rude words coming out of his mouth. the next, he was silently raging as he sat on the tire of his car while you discussed dinner plans with your uncle.

"please, don't worry about it." he takes a step back, gesturing for you to enter the room. you do just that, although a bit hesitant. and he doesn't blame you for that. "come in."

there's a moment of silence between you two. for a moment, the engines from the cars outside start to die down, and the frequency of the fireworks is slowing down, and there are more footsteps in the gravel that surround the trailer.

"i'm okay." he leans on the massage table in the middle of the room. he still hasn't changed out of his race suit. his helmet, balaclava and gloves are all thrown in different directions of the room. they had all been victims of his uncontrollable rage.

it's apparent that he's not even close to being okay. he just has to bank on the fact that you don't probe with more questions.

"it's okay if you're not," you answer in a gentle tone. a soft audible sigh passes your lips as you sit on the couch in the opposite side of the small room. "it's just you and me. i'm not part of your racing team."

his eyes do the speaking again. the heaving of his chest is enough to tell you that he's actually contemplating it. without another moment's hesitation, he starts to go at it. all of the emotions he's been feeling lately, the frustration from just being 5 laps shy of being on that podium.

he's just ranting, throwing his hands in the air while he paces all over the room. he makes a mental note to find a way to make it up to you after this - you're just sitting there patiently, nodding your head empathetically while he talks.

it’s as if you knew and understood all that he’s talking about.

"it's just unfair! i did everything right this time!" he exclaims, hands clenched up into a fist. "i should have been up there! i deserved to be on that podium!"

there's one more thing that bothers him. you. whatever he feels for you. the way his heart races whenever you're around, or the way he's always thinking of the way you fix his hair for marketing promotion material - he can't get you out of his mind. for years, now.

he'd met you when he was 18, fresh into red bull racing as christian's new prodigy. he had only seen you a total of 15 times within the span of 3 and a half years. the transition from crumbs of your presence to full-out spending the whole racing season with you was more than his heart could handle.

now that he's gotten to know you better, the 22-year-old is almost convinced that he might actually have feelings for you. "and-"

he looks up from the ground, flinching back slightly when you're staring directly into his eyes from across the room. your eyes dart down to his hands and it's only then he notices how his hands are clenched into fists next to him.

he almost slipped up about his feelings for you. good thing he caught himself at the last second. his chest heaves as he looks at you, shoulders tensed up and eyebrows furrowed.

you raise an eyebrow, slowly nodding. you make a gesture with your hand to encourage him to continue saying whatever is on his mind. "and?"

"and," i have feelings for you, "it's just so unfair."

he feels his body melt at your stare. his shoulders slump, his breathing starts to regulate and his hands slowly unravel from a fist. it's just so unfair that he's so hopelessly smitten with his principal's niece.

"i know." you push yourself off the couch and walk over to him. stopping just a few steps from him, he looks at you sigh. "i'm sorry that it happened to you, max."

then a small grin slowly stretches his lips. the race is over - there is absolutely nothing he can do to change the result. he shrugs, "it's just racing."

"you can still feel angry about it," you grin, "it's just me."

max shakes his head with a soft chuckle. "i know. it's okay; i'm okay."

you drop your head slightly. max knows you don't buy his lie. of course, he's still angry about what happened. but there is still some truth to what he said - he got unlucky today with the car.

you take a deep breath. he's caught completely by surprise when your arms spread out, taking a step forward and engulfing him in the warmest hug.

he catches a whiff of all your scents - your shampoo, your perfume, and creepily enough, the soap you use for your clothes. and he completely basks in your embrace, his arms wrapping themselves around your smaller frame. his neck rests on your shoulder, silently straining his back just to take you in.

"i know you're not," you whisper. you lean your head into his as you rub circles on his clothed back. "i'm here for you, okay?"

and he wants to say it to you. he gets an inkling, after you just spent the better part of 20 minutes letting him scream about his feelings, that this is bigger than himself.

"i," he trails off, arms tightening around you. he closes his eyes, repeatedly reminding himself that he's not willing to risk it. he releases the breath he's been holding. "thank you."

two.

max can barely keep himself upright in the seat. he's clutching onto his balaclava, eyes following the light shone into his eyes as per the doctor's request.

he had a bad crash with lewis during the race that sent him flying into the walls. he blacked out for a couple of seconds, and he's been in pain since they escorted him to the medical centre.

there's a soft knock on the door, before he hears the creak followed by footsteps. "i'll be back with results, okay?" the doctor straightens up before walking away from him. he acknowledges the presence of someone new, then proceeded to walk out of the room.

the relief max immediately felt when he sees you standing shyly by the door, hands clasped together.

"are you okay?" you ask softly, slowly making your way over to him. "i came as soon as i heard what happened to you. that was horrible, what happened to you."

he tilts his head at you, ignoring the strain in his neck and the pounding in his head. "as soon as you heard?"

you chuckle, glancing down at the floor in what could only be described as embarrassment. "i was in the bathroom taking a piss when geri ran in yelling for me," you admit.

your eyes roam his body, your eyes matching the empathetic stares of everyone he has looked at since he was helped out of that stupid car. he hates it. he hates being on the receiving end of those stares, but it was strangely comforting coming from you.

"are you alright? do you have any more injuries?" you ask. you look at him, hands hovering above his hand that rests on his knee. max gives you a small nod of consent.

"it's just a concussion, from what i can feel," max admits. though, it hurts everywhere. when you crash into a wall at that speed and black out, it's definitely going to hurt everywhere that it can.

he's watching you intently. you're lifting his sleeves to scan for bruises and moving about the neckline of his race suit to look for any injuries. there's a tingling sensation that you leave behind as your fingers graze over his now exposed skin.

"i'm okay."

"i don't buy that at all," you scoff. you reach over for the empty plastic chair and pull it to his side. you take a seat. "i'm glad you're okay. i was really worried something bad had happened."

he smiles. the way you care for him never fails to make his stomach churn and his heart start to race. "it could've been worse. i'm glad it's just a concussion i've got."

you turn your head to look at him. god, he wishes he can just take you in for an embrace and reassure you that he's perfectly fine. because he is. it's just some body aches - nothing he hasn't had to go through before as an athlete.

"i'm sorry about the race." you take his towel into your hands and fold it up. you gently tap on his face, wiping away the sweat that had formed on his face. "let me know if you need anything, okay? water, ice... food..."

"i will handle," he grins, his gaze following your hands' movements. "thank you, though."

you don't say anything. you just smile at him as you put the towel back down on his knee. you rest your hand just above the damp material and tilt your head at him. "how do you feel, though?"

"g-"

"about the points," you cut him off. "it's a close fight for the driver's championship. how do you feel about that?"

he shrugs, pouting his lips out. you widen your eyes at him as you anticipate the next thing coming from his mouth. "it's just racing. i'll come back next weekend."

you roll your eyes and lean back into the chair. both of your eyes are on the tv, watching the broadcast of the race together. "i believe in you. there's still a long season ahead of you."

he moves his eyes to look at you. not his head fully - he doesn't need you catching him stare at you. your unconditional support for him just made him want to jump for joy.

thought, sometimes he does wonder if you're only doing it because you work for the team. but other times you're just so believable that he thinks it's him as a person you're rooting for.

and god, he wants it to him so bad.

"it feels like forever - this pain," he admits. without thinking, his hand instinctively reaches forward. he puts his hand above yours. he squeezes your hand.

he sees you shake your head. you manoeuvre your hand. now your palms are touching. he could have sworn it was the concussion making him see and feel things when you intertwine your fingers.

if he were to be honest with you, he feels like this could the lowest point of the season for him. that rear failure earlier on felt minuscule compared to this crash. deep down inside, there's a fear that there's no coming back from this.

you squeeze his hand, slightly tighter than he had done to you just a few seconds prior. "i wish i could make it better. i'm sorry, max."

your voice wavers as you speak to him. and it kills him that you’re so worried for him. he does have a healthy support system, as much as the public wants to make it out that he’s too cold for that.

max wants to reassure you, just as you'd done with him. but he doesn't even know how to do that. your presence now, while he's still slightly out of it from the crash, is enough to put him at ease.

he sighs, squeezing your hand once more. it's at the tip of his tongue. if he could just convince himself to say it to you.

yet, he settles with, "you're the best."

three.

max leans back into the wall, arms folded over his chest. the strobing lights, the music bouncing off the walls, and a plethora of bodies surround him.

next to him, sebastian is deep in conversation with daniel. a conversation that he had tuned out of a few minutes ago. when he found you on the dance floor, terrorising alex and lily with your dance moves.

if you asked him, he would've told you that you're a natural at many things. dancing, unfortunately, is not one of them.

his silent pining comes to a halt when he meets lily's gaze from across the room. a knowing smile on the girl's face, he feels his cheeks heat up when she drags alex down to whisper something in his ear while pointing at max accusingly. alex turns his head in max's direction and his body shakes with a laugh.

great. they've caught on.

alex nods and raises his eyebrows at max teasingly. alex glances at you, shocked to find out that you've managed to shimmy your way 5 metres down the dance floor to now terrorise george and carmen.

max smiles to him, watching alex bend over backwards to get your attention. it's proven a challenge when you sandwich yourself between them.

when alex manages to finally get your attention, you just smile at him. you hand him the empty glass in your hand and grab carmen's hands. it's a wonderful sight - alex struggling to get your attention. but when he did, max swears his heart skips a beat.

because you lean into alex, listening to what he says into your ear. alex points in his direction and your face lights up when your eyes meets his.

you stride across the room and push yourself through the crowd. before he knew it, you're staring up at him with a toothy grin and wide eyes.

from the corner of his eyes, he notices sebastian and daniel have stopped their conversation. across the room, lily and carmen have flagged their boyfriends down. all eyes are on the two of you.

"what are you doing here all by yourself? you should be out on the dance floor celebrating!" you shout over the music, tiptoeing slightly to meet max's height. "you just won a race!"

"i'm good here, thanks!" max laughs, moreso at your state. your cheeks are puffed up and your lips are swollen. even your voice sounds damaged from all the screaming you've done. "enjoy your evening, please! don't worry about me!"

you shake your head in urgency. "no! you have to celebrate!"

he continues to look down at you, genuinely considering if he should let your persuasion tactics work on him tonight. who is he kidding; he can never say no to you.

"okay, but i'm driving us back to the hotel. so no drinks for me." before he could finish his sentence, you've managed to yank him off the wall. your hand has a firm grip around his wrist as you guide him through the crowd towards the bar counter.

"we'll get a cab!" you stop right at the bar and turn around to look at him. "you won the race today! aren't you excited? are you not at least a little bit prideful that you're leading the driver's championship again?"

max supposes you have a point. he should be excited. here he is in his 6th year in formula 1, being so close to clinching the world champion title for the first time in his life. it's just one night, right?

he can't possibly let you be more excited for his achievements than himself. that's just not right. did he not believe in himself?

he watches you prop yourself up on the bar stool, carefully telling the bartender your order. max's hands hover over your body, just in case you'd fall.

once again, you have managed to make his heart race by putting so much emphasis on his achievements. he's made his way onto the podium several times now that it seems almost mundane for him to end up there.

he wants the next big thing; he wants the world championship title. but why exactly is he waiting a whole few months just to celebrate again?

"come on, max! let loose a little. you don't have to wait for the season to be over to celebrate," you answer genuinely. for a moment there, max almost thinks you're sober. "if you don't want to celebrate your small wins, at least let me do it for you?"

he huffs. you're a lot more convincing when you pretend to be sober, after having downed a couple glasses of cocktails.

you tilt the unscrewed bottle of beer towards him, a freshly mixed glass of cocktail in your other. "congrats on winning the race today, max. i'm so proud of you."

max takes the bottle out of your hands. he willingly taps the neck of the bottle onto the rim of your glass. "cheers," he grins, watching you excitedly sipping away on your mojito.

if he could guess, you’re 6 glasses in. you’re definitely going to regret it in the morning.

you swiftly intertwine your fingers with his and start to pull him towards the dance floor. "let's go celebrate!"

you stop abruptly, your cocktail almost spilling all over your dress as he plants his feet into the ground. you squeeze his hand and look up at him shyly with your chests almost touching. even in the sea of people in the club, you managed to make it feel so intimate.

just you and him.

can he really excuse the words threatening to slip out of his mouth with half the bottle of beer in his system? can he just say it without you remembering it the next day?

but you beat him to saying something. "i'm so proud of you, max."

he smiles, letting a small breath out. he squeezes your hand. "thank you. you're the best."

four.

it's upsetting, really, not having you in the paddock all weekend. what you'd thought to be a simple itchy throat from all the sweets you've consumed had turned into a covid scare. you're isolated in the hotel, albeit having tested negative, already better.

the team couldn't risk getting either driver contracting a sickness. especially not max, a clear contender for the title this year.

max has not seen you since tuesday. the photos of him on the red bull racing social media platforms are just not as good when it's not you taking them. nobody else on the marketing team ever tells him his hair is a mess. neither do you - you always just reach in to fix his hair for him.

max huffs, adjusting his shirt as he stood in front of your hotel room. the small bouquet of flowers suffocate in the grip of his hands. a plastic hangs on his fingers.

the lock clicks. the door is slowly pulled open. there you are, in all your glory. your hair is up in a ponytail, you're in your pyjamas with juice in your hand. your eyes widen. "max! what are you doing here?"

with flowers in his hands, there's really only so many excuses he can make up. he tilts his head and his eyes narrow down. he's searching his brain for an excuse - something that doesn't scream the fact that he is hopelessly in love with you. "um..."

he stays in the hallway of the hotel, and you stay inside with your hand still on the door handle.

when he had gotten off the race track, alex had celebrated with him. at some point, max expected someone to bring it up. it just shocked him that it had taken this long.

alex gave him a firm pat on the back as they strolled the paddock after media commitments. and the question finally came up. "so are you ever going to ask (y/n) out?"

the question should not have even shocked him in the first place. he had been sitting around waiting for someone to ask him this. nevertheless, he was still dumbfounded by the question.

he started explaining - how he can never get around to asking you out. you're christian's beloved niece. first of the next generation. christian even introduced you as the daughter he had to raise before he ever thought about having kids of his own.

and alex gave him the weirdest stare. because everyone on the paddock could easily tell max had feelings for you. he didn't do much to hide it either. it'd apparently been so bad that even toto wolff sneaks around the paddock with questions if there's been progress.

and so, here he is, standing in front of your hotel room after having won his home race. when he managed to escape his pr manager, he took a shower and immediately bought flowers, some food and came straight to you.

he missed you all week.

"max?"

his answer comes out in a ramble. if you hadn't spent so much time with him, you probably wouldn't have understood. but in your week of absence, the driver doted on you with video messages, voice messages and pictures. endless updates with the grid, the drama, the placements.

anything to make it feel like you were still there with him.

"can i take you out on a date?"

his heart races. beads of sweat form on his forehead. the hallway, that had once felt so icy suddenly became so warm.

"what?" your jaw drops, eyebrows are raised in shock. the silence is deafening.

is this some kind of sick prank alex is pulling on him?

immediately, max goes into defensive mode. "i mean, it's okay if you don't! i just thought if i don't shoot my shot now, then i'll never know. i won't take it personally!" he lifts up the plastic filled with tupperwares of food. "i even brought you supper!"

you scoff with a laugh bubbling up from your stomach. you leap up from your spot, throwing yourself onto max. you lift your feet off the ground. his available arm wraps around your waist to stabilise you. his other arm, already busy with gifts for you, darts out to hold the door ajar.

and what does this mean, exactly? max verstappen has never been one to take these things for an answer. he needs is in black and white - in the clearest of clarifications.

"yes, of course!" you squeal into his shoulder. okay, now he can celebrate. it had taken you a solid 10 seconds in a tight embrace before you decided that the hotel's hallways were too exposing for your liking.

finally, he lets you guide him into the hotel room. he can't stop the wide grin forming on his face either. by the looks of it, neither can you.

"right. these are for you," max finally says, holding out the bouquet of flowers to you. "and i'm sorry i'm late. i could have gotten here earlier if it weren't for alex and lando fighting me over what flowers to get you."

your eyebrow raises, willingly receiving the flowers. "you were in cahoots with those two?"

"and george," max shrugs simply, scrunching up his nose. "but he was easier to deal with than those two."

you smile, if it's possible to get even bigger than what's already there, as your fingers lightly graze over the petals of the flowers. max simply stands back while he watches you admire the brightly coloured bouquet.

he's confident about one thing that night: what kind of flowers to get you. so when lando and alex were fighting him over which flowers to get you, they were simply debating over the roses.

but he is in the netherlands. what else could have been the right choice of flowers but the tulips? and he's in an expensive sport, after all. it would be so uncharacteristic of him to undermine the way he felt for you.

long story short, he got the most gigantic bouquet filled with striped tulips. he spent 150 euros. that's not even near the amount he knows he feels for you.

if you asked him for the world, he'd simply exhaust every single resource he has to give it to you.

"thank you so much," you coo, finally looking up at him. you lean in, pressing a firm kiss to his cheek. and he will absolutely spend the rest of his night thinking of this exact moment.

this is quite possibly the furthest he's gone with you. and he almost slips up again. he should've just said it, but he's just not quite sure he should. it's just going to scare you off.

"oh! and, congrats on the race win today," you cheer before pressing your lips against his cheek again.

max grins. he doesn’t know why he put it past you. you’ve made it clear you’re going to be his biggest fan. “oh, you watched the race?”

you’re gently laying the bouquet on top of the table in the corner of your room. “of course. it was a brilliant race. i'm so proud of you."

he just squeezes your shoulder. "thank you. you're the best."

five.

in his dark hotel room, the tv illuminates your face as your eyes lock on the movie you've chosen. it's the only way max can see your face. he'd love to be able to pay attention to this movie, but how could be when you're all tangled up with him.

"are you scared?" you suddenly mutter. your first words in almost 20 minutes, almost making him question if you're making conversation because you're falling asleep.

"what?" he's genuinely dumbfounded with the question. he glances at the tv, curious if he had dozed off long enough for you to choose another movie. but no. it's still mamma mia playing. "we're watching a musical."

max watches your body heave up, then down. "for tomorrow."

he tenses up. he's been trying his hardest not to think about it at all, actually. since he'd finished up his evening with media commitments, he just went straight to you in the garage office. he packed his bags and took you out to dinner.

he's secured pole position for tomorrow. he didn't want to think of anything else right now.

he doesn't want that stress passed on to you.

max hums, suddenly feeling an interest in the musical. it's meryl streep singing abba, after all. how can he not be any more interested? he shrugs. "okay, i guess."

he avoids your eyes. all eyes and remaining attention of the evening is on the actress belting out a song. and it's rudely interrupted when you pause it.

you stumble around, propping yourself up to your elbow to give him a stern look. "okay?" sometimes max forgets you're now his girlfriend. he forgets that he doesn't have to put up a front to shield you from his real emotions. "what do you mean 'okay'?"

he sighs. he turns his head back to face you, almost flinching at the glare you're giving him. he clears his throat as he pushes himself up against the arm of the couch. he sits cross-legged and you mirror his posture. he shrugs again. "i can't overthink it now. i just have to do my best tomorrow."

you throw your hands up in the air, scoffing. "what?"

max is at a loss for words. what response, exactly, did you expect out of him? "what?" he says back, hands also thrown up into the air. from the amount of time you've spent around him on the race track, he expected you to know his mindset when stepping into a race.

he can't overthink it before he even gets on the track. in fact, there is no room for that at all.

you resign to the other end of the couch and fold your arms over your chest. you even pull your feet back, not wanting to be in the range of his touch.

"(y/n), i don't know what you want me to say, darling," max responds gently. he's slightly annoyed, yes, but he doesn't want that to triumph your relationship. "you know the clear mind i need to get into a race. if i overthink, that's when it's over for me."

you roll your eyes. "no. it's just you and me. there is absolutely no way you have no opinions about the race tomorrow. not even a single thought? seriously, max?" you tear your eyes from him. "i'm not christian."

max sighs. he scooches over to you on the over end of the couch. though you squeeze yourself further into the armrest away from him.

he huffs, wrapping his arms around you. he pulls you in and presses a kiss to the top of your head. "of course, i have a thought in my head about the race. but if i let it get to me, darling, it can cost me the championship."

you hum, but there's a hint of annoyance. though, you give in. because you drop your head back on his shoulder and pout. "okay, fine. race your heart out, max. i just know you've got this."

he gives you a slight squeeze. a weaker one compared to others. honestly? he's terrified of screwing up tomorrow. he just wants that title so bad. all his life, he's worked for it.

he's simply afraid to let christian down. more importantly, he's afraid to let you down. though his handful of mental breaks about being so close to the final race of the season, you'd reassure him that you'll always be proud of him no matter what.

it's just not enough for him.

the movie starts to play again. you coddle up into his lap and he rests his cheeks on your head. i love you.

thank you, you're the best.

max has not been able to get the ringing out of his head since he crossed the checkered flag. he has not been able to think straight since then.

he just won his first world championship title. he's on his knees, his head resting on the tire. all 58 laps, all he could think of is how is he going to win? how will the season play out?

he finally lifts his head, dropping himself back to sit on the track of the abu dhabi track. he groans loudly, almost into a scream, as he unclips his helmet. he yanks it off his head, then his balaclava almost immediately.

he is feeling so many things.

then across the barrier, he sees you. eyes filled with tears, hair pulled back into a ponytail, in your very own red bull racing uniform. his stare down with you doesn't last long. christian is quick to yank you away.

and he spends the next 5 minutes scanning the crowd for you. sure, he wants to celebrate with the people that made it possible for him to even be there in the first place. but there is you.

"max!" your voice makes him whirl around. a sigh of relief slumps his shoulder. it's you.

his face lights up at the sight of you. just a minute ago, he felt so drained. he barely found it in himself to walk to his team for cheers. yet here he is jogging towards you.

"world champion, max verstappen!" you scream. you leap off the ground, legs quickly wrapping around his waist.

his arms wrap around your torso, just holding you close to his body. "i'm so proud of you," you cry into his already wet neck. you wrap your arms around his shoulders tighter. "i fucking told you."

he doesn't even know what to think. his mind is in a jumble of thoughts. it's undeniable that you had pushed him to his best this season. just having you there, reassuring him every single weekend. even when he crashed, even when he'd retired out of a race.

your legs slowly drop back down to the ground, and he finally gets a good look at your face. for some reason, you're just as sweaty as he is. the ponytail on your head is falling apart and the makeup running down your face almost makes him laugh.

then the excitement obviously hits you again. because you give him a firm and strong pat on his shoulder. "you proved them all wrong, max! you're a world champion!"

his chin is held high and his chest is puffed out. you'd never doubted him. it almost brings him to his knees how much support you had for him.

max is so full of emotion. the race, the title; you. you jump in your spot and clap, nose scrunching up in delight. "i told you this was your season! i knew it all along!"

and he just blurts it out. "(y/n), i love you."

you don't even hesitate. it's like you'd been waiting around to say it too. "i'm so fucking proud of you. i love you."

[asapeveryday]

SHOCK FACTOR★彡 PART 3

Previous. Next.

Pairing: Paige Bueckers x Rival!Reader

Warnings: swearing, suggestive jokes/language, tension

Summary: having Paige’s number means she can bother you whenever she wants, but maybe a night out with her isn’t a bother at all.

A/n: enjoy guys 😇lmk what you think of this one

YOU

is this paige?

???

Has anyone else given you their number since you got here?

YOU

no…

PAIGE

Aight, so who else would it be then? 🤘🏼

YOU

i should’ve thrown out that napkin tbh!🙂

PAIGE

Ignoring that. How’s the hangover?

YOU

it’s ok. getting coffee helped ig

PAIGE

Having another night out might help too…if u fw that

YOU

with you? id rather die then “fw that” 🙏

PAIGE

Ok rot in ya hotel room see if I care 🤷🏼‍♀️

Seen.

PAIGE

Actually nvm I feel bad for ur miserable ass. U shud fr go out and see what Connecticut has to offer. Ever been to Gianni’s?

YOU

no i haven’t, I’ve only been here for like two days. is it italian food?

PAIGE

Only the best in town 😉 u shud def go

YOU

ugh I would but i have to see if elaine can take me cus my teammates are busy

PAIGE

I could take u if u want?

YOU

typing…

YOU CAN FEEL yourself getting socially drained as you text her, at least that’s what you tell yourself. Paige is infuriating and arrogant, which comes with the deadly additions of charisma and the ability to keep you on edge with every word spoken, or even typed.

You’d always known of this, even before your game with her that day. A player like Paige can be hard to come across; perfectly capable, talented and independent yet somehow the best team player out there, sharing passes she can without a doubt make. Why? Because she doesn’t need to prove anything.

It often bothered you, especially since you constantly needed to prove yourself during the start of your college career. You took every shot you could get your hands on, and she gave shots away like candy whilst still having a huge reputation as a player. Obviously it went deeper than that, but the simple fact just stuck to your brain.

You can’t help but recall her face, inches from yours attempting to pry your ball from your grasp. Like she was deserving, like it was hers for the taking. She had made a similar face on the panel where she dissed you soon afterwards, and then again while watching you at the bar, and just before writing her number on the napkin. You wondered if she was making that face right now as she texts you.

PAIGE

I could take u if u want?

The text is simple but it summons some sort of unique feeling in you. Paige Bueckers is offering to pick you up in her car, on her night off, and take you to a restaurant. And you, for whatever reason, are considering saying yes.

Sighing to yourself, you weigh your options. Option one: you sit around your hotel alone till your teammates come back, most probably drunk from a bar since it’s a Saturday. Option two: you ask Elaine to take you out once again, even though you’re probably gonna see her the whole week you’re here. Option three: you let the girl who shit-talked you at a post game conference take you out for dinner.

YOU

i guess i should go out. DONT act like ur doing me a favour tho….n if I don’t have fun i’m blocking u.

PAIGE

Drop the addy. I’ll come by in an hour

Seen.

After hurriedly pulling yourself together, taking an Advil, checking out the restaurant’s Instagram and getting ready you can’t help but find your heart steadily hammering inside of you. Paige is coming to your hotel. You’re gonna be in her car. She’s taking you to her favourite restaurant. This has to be the most peculiar thing that has happened all year.

-

The car ride is significantly better then you expected it would be. Paige adamantly seems to prevent any room for awkward silence to seep through, commenting on your outfit and filling the vehicle with music that makes the interior buzz from the volume. She has a free look on her face, chair reclined more then you’d dare if you were in the drivers seat, hair blowing in her face from the windows being down.

“I’m surprised you’re driving me out.” You say, finally airing what was on your mind.

Paige shrugs. “Didn’t feel like drinking today. Plus, I’m in the mood to be generous and show you what Storrs has.”

“If someone told me I’d be hanging out with Paige Bueckers like a week ago, I think I’d be fucking appalled. Or disgusted. Or both.” You laugh.

She chuckles, glancing at you sneakily. “You swear a lot, don’t you?”

“Awe my bad.” You pout, giving her a fake-concerned look. “Forgot you can’t handle a little language.”

“I can handle it,” she grumbles. “I just think cursing is better for specific situations.”

“Like what?”

Paige wets her lips almost sheepishly, but she keeps her eyes straight on the road. “Like sex.”

A beat passes before you respond “Sorry I couldn’t savour a couple words for you and your little kink.”

She looks over at you now, and you meet her gaze as equally as you can. She just lets out a smile, shaking her head to herself as she pulls into the parking lot. You try to ignore the elevator-sinking feeling in your stomach from her words as you get out from the car.

The restaurant is beautiful. It’s cozy, ambient and well decorated. Not too fancy and not too full, just perfect. You’re seated in a more secluded area, per Paige’s request. She orders for you, insisting she knows exactly what to get for the best possible experience.

The food is good, and you don’t feel the need to hide it from Paige, who visibly grows at your praise for the place she picked out.

“So, are you jus in Connecticut for Elaine?” She says.

“Not really.” You reply. “Me and some of the others are just doing a little East Coast road-trip. I wasn’t really interested in coming to Storrs, but it made sense to come by and see her.”

“For a whole week?” She raises her eyebrow. “Seems like you’re close.”

“I was only gonna stay in Storrs for a couple days, then go to Hartford but the girls seem to like it here.” You shrug. “They think it’s cute, being a small town and all, but it’s pretty boring if you’re not a student.”

“It’s better if you’re with fun people.” She smiles.

“I hope you don’t think you’re fun.”

“Compared to Elaine I definitely am.” Paige scoffs.

You can’t help but feel a little more hostility than humour in her tone.

“Do you guys know each other?” You ask, as sly and innocent as you can muster. Paige seems hesitant.

“Nah.” She finally decides. “I mean, we’ve talked before. Ion know her personally.”

“It’s kinda funny, she said she doesn’t pay much attention to you but I think she might have a little crush.” You laugh.

Paige visibly stiffens at this, which catches you by surprise.

In a split second she regains her calm, unbothered composure. “What has she said?”

“Not much.” You shrug. “Just seems a little interested.”

Paige’s jaw clenches for a moment, and you’re not surprised when she changes the subject. “How many people have been on your case since I posted that picture of us from the bar on my story?”

“God, so many.�� You laugh, shaking your head. “You?”

“You don’t even wanna know.” She scoffs. “Not sure why everyone was so crazy bout it though, s’not like we were beefing for real.”

“Right!” You say, happy she seems to be on the same page. “It was just some petty crap. I guess people just really were hoping there would be some rivalry.”

You think for a moment, before saying. “Maybe we should keep this drama thing up. Might be fun.”

“It’s a lil too late for that,” Paige shakes her head with a slight smile. “remember how KK and Ice were on live yesterday at the coffee shop? Yeah, we kinda were in the background at some point. People saw us talking.”

“You’re joking.”

“Dead serious. There are edits and everything.”

You rest your head in your hands, elbows on the table, lessening the proximity between you and her. “I only get into these weird ass situations when I interact with you, Paige.”

She sits up in her seat, blue eyes quickly looking you up and down. “Yet you’re still here.”

“Girl’s gotta have fun.” You shrug. Her foot hits yours under the table, her eyebrow raised as if challenging you. You have a sudden thought of going under the table and letting your hands unzip her cargo pants, but instead you just kick her back.

“Wanna go?” She asks. You don’t want to go back to the hotel, and she seems to pick up on it. “The area we’re in is nice. We can walk around a bit.”

You smile and nod. “Split the bill?”

“Fuck no.” She shoots you a look, pulling out her credit card from the back of her phone.

“You cursed!” You exclaim, to which she scoffs.

“I said it’s alright in specific situations.”

Now it’s your turn to scoff. “Well we’re not having sex, are we?”

The way her eyelashes flutter at your question gives you jitters. “Aight, stop talking.” She finally manages to respond. You just send her a look that you hope makes her nervous.

-

“You’re not funny.” She grumbles, attempting to grab your phone from you.

“Back off, Bueckers! I’m serious.” You laugh, sidestepping her with your phone above your head. The street was empty and the lights were on, putting the two of you in a yellow glow against the night. You’d been walking around the neighbourhood, observing houses and learning a bit about Storrs for the past hour.

“Give me your phone, I know you ain’t deleting those.” She huffs, grabbing for your phone. You try to escape her grasp but she’s got longer limbs, so eventually your phone is in her pocket and she’s wearing a proud look on her face.

It’s nice to walk in the quiet of evening, her beside you. You have no idea where you are but you can’t help but trust she can get you back to the car in no time. Not just yet though.

You turn to look at Paige almost shamelessly. There’s just so much to observe with her. Her confident posture, toothy smile, sleek straightened blonde hair, even the baggy cargo pants and sweater. She always looked good, it never failed to annoy you.

“Either your pants are too tight or crazy baggy.” You note. She just raises her eyebrow.

“Sounds like you just want me to take my pants off at this point.”

“Wouldn’t mind a little show.” You reply almost instantly, shocking yourself at the surge of confidence. She doesn’t seem taken aback, in fact she’s intrigued.

“Is that your usual routine? Have a meal out then have a meal at home?”

“Maybe it is.” You shrug. “I never object to a wine n dine.”

“And what exactly would you object to?”

“Cocky girls who think they’re the shit.” You say, turning your head to face her. You don’t mean to target her, but she simply smiles.

“Is it really being cocky if I can back it up though?” Paige asks quietly. You’re not walking anymore, stuck in place on an empty path between buildings. She’s closing in on you until your back hits a brick wall. The way Paige is staring down at you, hands in her pockets, lip between her teeth. It’s nothing you’d object to, ever.

“I won’t believe it till I see it.” You mutter, holding her eye. The air is tense in a new way that you haven’t felt with her since you first met in the bar. Her face is entrancing.

Paige’s hands lift your jaw upwards, and she leans into your ear. “You might not see it,” she mumbles, breath hot against your skin. “But you’ll definitely feel it.”

When she pulls back from your ear she stays hovering just above you, hands chastely holding your head up. You’re in the perfect position to kiss, and you can’t stop your eyes from darting between her electric stare to her lush, pink lips.

You can literally feel her breath on your mouth when a piercing ring cuts through the moment. It’s coming from her pocket, and she pulls out your phone. Paige’s face twists as she reads the screen. “It’s Elaine.”

“Just- just decline it.” You rush out, not caring how desperate you sound. You can feel how wet you are, and the lack of heat against you is blaring.

“She texted you too.” Paige scoffs. “She’s waiting for you at your hotel.”

You don’t even know what to say. Paige’s face is expressionless. You’re disappointed, but there’s no point in begging. Nothing really happened.

“Let’s get you home.” She says, starting to walk back from where you came. “Shouldn’t keep her waiting.” Her tone is dripping with toxicity. It makes you shiver.

[piftamere]

something real (wc : 1.4k)

secret santa fic for @eussstasss as part of the hq x reader secret santa by @/lale-txt, i hope you'll like it! i had fun writing it <3

synopsis : she asks her dear best friend, Suna Rintarou, to accompany her to her family Christmas party as her pretend boyfriend, too embarrassed to go alone another year. no ulterior motives.

content : suna rintarou x f!reader, fake dating, friends to lovers, fluff

divider by @nectardaddy

Year after year, the questions were the same.

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

"Are you still single?"

"Are you ever going to bring someone home to your family?"

And every time she had to disappoint them, forcing a smile as she replied she wasn’t seeing anyone. She could see their own smiles drop and their faith in her weaken.

This year, she couldn’t take it anymore. Something snapped. Before she could stop herself, she blurted out that she'd have someone accompany her to the family Christmas party.

The moment the lie left her lips, she wanted to take it back, but it was too late. Relief washed over her parents’ faces, her mother rushing to the phone to give her grandmother the big news.

She couldn’t shatter their happiness now, not when she’d seen how much it meant to them.

A few weeks later, she was slumped over her best-friend's couch, face buried in a pillow.

"I still haven’t found anyone," she whined, her voice muffled as she groaned in frustration. "It’s tomorrow."

Suna leaned against the armrest, amused. ''You sure you tried everything?"

"Yes, everything."

"And now you’re giving up?"

"Yup." She replied, defeated.

"So… no Christmas?"

"Nope."

As she was blocking out the mocking snicker Suna was making, an idea struck her. A desperate, ridiculous idea. She turned her head just enough to look at him, eyes pleading, peaking over the pillow.

"Wait…" she began hesitantly. She sat up, clutching his arm. "Do me this one favor. I’ll owe you forever. Please."

He raised an eyebrow, almost sure he knew what she meant, his lips stretched into a mischievous grin. "What?" He wanted to hear her say it.

"Be my fake boyfriend. Please."

"Why not just tell them you broke up with your imaginary boyfriend?"

She groaned again, burying her face in his sleeve. "I can’t. I can’t deal with the pity stares or them thinking i made it up. Please Rin, pretty please."

He wanted to reply that technically, she did make it up, but her desperation must have struck a chord because, after a beat of silence, he sighed, "Fine."

If she’d had more time to think it through, maybe she’d have asked why he agreed so quickly. Maybe she’d have wondered about that smirk on his face. But with the clock ticking, she ignored the signs.

She was going to regret this.

The next day, they were standing on the doorstep of her childhood home, a freshly bought pie in her hands. She glanced at the front door, now having second thoughts, her stomach tying itself into knots.

As Suna reached for the doorbell, he suddenly paused, his lips letting out a mischievous chuckle. "Wait a sec," he said, stepping closer.

She shot him a curious look. "What are you doing?"

Without answering, he slipped his arm casually around her waist, pulling her snug against him. She flinched, nearly dropping the pie.

"Relax," he said with a playful wink, his smirk slightly infuriating. "We have to sell it, you know?"

His hand rested comfortably on her hip, like it was the most casual thing ever. She swore she could feel the warmth of his touch burn her skin through the thick fabric of her coat.

Her cheeks flushed, both from embarrassment and the sudden realization of how committed he was to the whole thing. "You’re enjoying this way too much," she muttered under her breath.

"You begged me for this, remember?", Suna replied nonchalantly, reaching for the doorbell with his free hand.

Before she could respond, the door swung open, revealing her mother who practically dragged them inside.

It felt surprisingly good to walk around the house, introducing her "boyfriend" to her relatives. The warm smiles, the approving nods and whispers. She'd almost fall for the act herself.

If only she could ignore the strange, fluttery feeling settling in her stomach every time she looked at him.

At dinner, he played his part a little too well. In the name of being believable, his hand lingered on hers as it rested on the table. She had a hard time getting used to the soft squeeze of his fingers when he leaned back in his chair, cracked a joke with her father or complimented her mother's cooking. She blinked, taken aback by how effortlessly he seemed to fit into her family, like he’d been part of it all along.

She caught herself stealing glances at him, feeling peculiarly shy at this unfamiliar, charming side of him.

After dinner, they gathered around the Christmas tree to exchange gifts. The soft glow of the lights, the scent of pine in the air and the laughter of her family made this moment feel all too real.

Suna turned to her, a small, neatly wrapped box in his hand. She wasn't expecting this. How had he found the time to buy her a gift? She was trying not to read into it.

"Here," he said casually, holding it out to her.

"You got me something?"

"Of course. I’m your boyfriend." he replied with a small grin.

Their fingers brushed as he handed it to her, and for a fleeting moment, their eyes met. Something in his gaze, something warm, playful, and maybe a little too sincere for comfort, made her heart thump loudly against her ribs.

It was becoming harder to remember this was all an act.

She tore her eyes away, focusing on unwrapping the gift in an attempt to hide the blush creeping up her cheeks. Inside was a delicate bracelet, a thin chain with a beautiful charm that shined faintly in the tree's glow.

"So? Do you like it?" He asked, watching her reaction intently. He almost sounded nervous.

She nodded, "Rin… It’s beautiful. I didn’t think-"

"That I had taste? Ouch-"

She sighed and rolled her eyes, a smile still on her lips. "That you'd go this far."

Suna leaned in, his voice dropping just enough for only her to hear. "What can I say? I’m committed to my role."

Carefully, she took it out of the box. She was struggling to put it on, when he took it from her hands.

"Allow me," he gently wrapped it around her wrist and skillfully clasped it. His touch lingered on her skin, longer than necessary, but neither of them moved.

The rest of the evening passed in a blur, but her mind was far away. Every stolen glance at him, every playful touch, only made the knot in her chest tighten even more.

A little lost in her thoughts, she found herself by the window, gazing out at the snow-covered yard as she mindlessly fidgeted with the charm on her bracelet. The calming view was a welcome distraction as she tried to untangle the mess in her mind.

"Look what we have here." Suna whispered, coming up behind her, his voice tinged with mischief.

She turned, slightly startled as her eyes followed his hand pointing to the branch of mistletoe over her head.

"Seriously?"

"I don't make the rules," Suna replied, stepping closer. He shrugged, raising his hands in defeat.

Fed up with how confident he’d been all day, she sighed and tugged firmly on his sleeve. He stumbled forward, caught completely off guard. Now impossibly close, he stared at her, wide-eyed. For the first time since they arrived at her parents’ house, he was dead silent. She couldn’t help but savor the moment of peace.

Maybe for a moment too long, because the surprise was wearing off, a playful glint returning to his eyes. "What? Lost your-"

"Oh shush." she cut him off, her voice firm. Before he could react, she leaned up and kissed him.

His lips were still, as if the shock hadn’t quite worn off. But then he kissed her back, his hand coming to rest on the side of her face. His playful demeanor becoming gentle.

When they finally parted, her cheeks burned. His usually half-lidded eyes glinted with something she couldn’t quite name, something intense, real.

A little breathless, he spoke, "You said you’d owe me forever, right?"

Her brows knit in confusion, her heart still racing. "Yes?"

His lips quirked into a small, almost shy smile. "Go out with me. For real this time."

She stared at him, her mind reeling. And as she looked back on today and their relationship, that always seemed tainted by something a little deeper than friendship, she realized the feeling gnawing at her insides since this morning wasn’t anxiety, it was hope.

And maybe it was time to stop pretending.

[jarofstyles]

Teenage Dirtbag 5

Here we go again! I decided to bring back Fratrry in the rotation. For those of you who didn’t read them yet (or forgot) check out the series masterlist. These updates are shorter so I can get them out somewhat frequently instead of making you wait hehe.

Check out our Patreon for early access and 170+ exclusive writings

Teenage Dirtbag Masterlist

WC- 1.5k

Warnings- asshole H, angst, Y/N putting him in his place as usual

----

Harry knew he should be a bit more cautious when it came to Y/N but… god, how could he not try and push the envelope if it meant her maybe giving into it again? 

The reality of it was that Y/N, a girl who hated his guys most likely, had been the best fuck he’d ever had. She had blown his mind in the literal and metaphorical sense, and he couldn’t stop thinking about it. Fate had a funny way of working, sure, but he couldn’t be too mad considering he knew their chemistry was too good to push away completely. 

H: what do ya want from the cafe, baby doll? 

Y/N: nothing that you’ve touched. 

Harry smirked at his phone. So predictable, already back with the snarky responses. It worked him up a bit, thinking about how this snarky girl had pleaded for more, kissed him sloppily as his balls smacked against her ass and dragged her nails down his scalp. Such a sweet thing for him that night had gone right to being sour as soon as she left. 

H: ok, so you want me to lick your cake pop. Got it. 

H: it isn’t like we haven’t shared saliva before ;) 

Y/N: yeah, lick on it and then choke . Let me know how that goes so I can cancel our session this afternoon. 

The hope was to bring the sessions here one day. As much as Y/N had disdain towards him, the sparks had flown during sex. She had loved it just as much as he did- he’ll, during their last round she had pushed him on the bed and rode his cock until he was sensitive, her nail marks left on his chest for days. 

H: I’ve got something else you can choke on, baby

Y/N: I will quite literally not show up today, your grades be damned. 

His lips puffed in a pout. He was pushing it, but it was so fun to rile her up. Eventually, he hoped she would give in and like him. See the fun parts of him like other people did- but for now, he would play this game. Cat and mouse… though he wasn’t quite sure which one he was. 

H: fineeee. I’ll be good. 

For now. 

Y/N: please do. It was a mistake and we don’t need to keep bringing it up. 

It was a mistake he very much wanted to repeat, over and over again. 

H: yes, maam. I’ll see you at 2 🫡

Y/N: don’t be late, I’m serious. I have something afterwards and I can’t be late 

H: oooo, a hot date? 

Y/N: yes, actually. So don’t fuck this up or you aren’t getting your full hour. 

His smirk quickly fell. 

She was going on a date? With fucking who? 

That wasn’t in his plans. For some reason, guiltily, he hadn’t anticipated the idea of someone else making a move on the girl he wanted to fuck. Let alone her accepting. She seemed like such an ice queen with him that it led him to forget just how sweet she was to literally everyone else.

It was slightly infuriating, how everyone had nothing but good things to say about her. She was nice and she helped out this person when they moved, she helped plan this persons birthday party, she spotted this person 5 when they went to get coffee… there was no denying everyone else got the sweet parts while all the sourness was reserved for him. 

And yet, he still pushed her. Still played this game and taunted her because how the fuck else was he supposed to get her attention? He was going to have to kick it up a notch.  

——

“Who’s the date with?” He asked in the middle of their session, ignoring the paper in front of him as he looked at her. She was way more dressed up than he’d seen her at a tutoring meet before, a little skirt that brushed her thighs and a little button up tucked into it giving it a sweet but sexy combination that made him a little twitchy. 

In all honesty it had been hard to focus since he seen her today. All he could think about was how those pretty lips had been bitten and swollen from his kisses, how they’d curled around his name so fucking sweetly that it had his cock stirring at the memory. Her perfume was seemingly freshly applied and it was interfering with his brain chemistry or something, because all he wanted to do was throw the books to the side and pull her up to straddle his lap. 

He imagined her hands knocking off his SnapBack, tangling in his hair as she rode his cock right in the secluded part of the library. His hands under her skirt and gripping her plush ass yet again, unbuttoning that little shirt and leaving more marks on her skin. 

Marks he caught a glimpse of as she suddenly looked up at him. 

“His name is Derek.” She cleared her throat. “He asked me out on Monday so I decided to say yes. He’s really nice.” For some reason she looked embarrassed by the information she had divulged, like she hadn’t meant to say all of that. 

That sneaky little minx. 

“Uh huh…” he let his eyes linger on the bruising that was fading but not quite covered by the collar of her shirt. “And what is Derek going to think of this pretty little thing?” 

It was gentle, his knuckle lightly brushing over the mark he remembered sucking during the first round. He knew he had caused some nice little lovebites but that one was still healing, so it was probably a dark one. Fuck, it probably looked hot as fuck when it was first developing. “Suits you, y’know. My marks on your skin. I could put some more there, If you want.” 

He was pushing it and he knew it, getting closer to her as his nose brushed her cheek. She wasn’t pushing him away, so he counted that as a good sign. “I could take you back to my place and I could give you quite a few more. A refresher course because… I highly doubt this guy is gonna be able to make you squirt all over his dick. Which you did with me, twice.” He hummed, letting his fingers fall a bit deeper down the collar of her shirt. “I don’t think he’s going to give you what you need, princess. We already did it once and so we’ll… it would just make sense to do it again. I think we have gotten well enough acquainted that I could do the job.”

He hadn’t seen the cold drink coming. Poured all over his lap and seeping through his shorts, he yelped as the icy liquid  hit his skin. “Oi! What the fuck?” 

“I told you, last time was a one and done for this particular reason, Styles.” She snarled, grabbing her books and hurrying to shove them into her bag. “Because you’d be a fucking pig and see me as a sex object instead of a human being. I’m not some fucking challenge, I’m a girl with feelings and I- I told you, I wasn’t doing it again and it meant it!” 

“Babe- no, I wasn’t suggesting that at all. I’d never say that shit.” He tried to fight, unsure how it had gone south so fast. Apparently, he was shit at reading her cues. Worse than he originally thought. 

“You don’t have to say it. You suggest it. You don’t respect what I say. This is why I was never going to go and do anything with you. Who gives a fuck how hot you are if you’re an arrogant son of a bitch who can’t get his head out of his own ass to see exactly why people don’t like you.” Slinging her bag across her shoulder, she scowled at him. “This isn’t going to work. I’ll find you another tutor. I can deal with your stupid flirting, but throwing what we did in my face? Absolutely the fuck not.”

Harry didn’t have a chance to defend himself, feeling incredibly confused as she ran off. Any call of her name went ignored, the librarian hushing him as he made his way out of the doors but it was too late. She was god knows where. 

Who knew those legs could run so fast?

He was a little pissed that she was assuming he thought of her as some sort of object. He didn’t mean to make her feel any sort of way about it all, not thinking he was throwing it in her face, but apparently she thought so. 

H: Y/N can you please come back???

H: I didn’t mean to upset you 

H: I know I can be a dick and that’s part of our thing but I never thought of you as a sex object and I never would 

H: I didn’t think I was throwing it in your face 

H: can you answer me please????

H: I don’t want a new tutor, I want you :( 

H: y/n, cmon 

H: alright, I’ll try again tomorrow. But we need to talk. Please.

[jupiter-esque]

could u write karma with a s/o that doesn’t get into trouble? Kinda like an opposite like they’re still outgoing but the type to never skip and only wanting straight A’s and are kinda sensitive in contrast to him? (🫶🫶ur writing is so cute idk if you still write for karmaa aaa!!😭)

Note: I will NEVER stop writing for karma 😤😤😤

Honestly?

He doesn't even really notice you at first.

Another student in class-E, just like any other.

Obviously that is until you managed to score higher than him in maths during exam season.

It started off as a miniature rivalry, very one-sided might I add.

He'd come to you smirking by the end of the next exam with a mark higher than yours only to be surprised when you smile widley and congratulate him.

Every. Single. Time.

Huh?

You're not supposed to do that, your eyes are supposed to burn with determination and annoyance. You're supposed to snatch that paper from his hands and wipe that stupid smirk off his face.

Clearly not.

Its not even a fake smile, there isn't even a hint of malice in your eyes.

It's almost as if you're happy for him.

You don't even know him, not properly at least.

This really changes perspectives for the assassin so now he's shifted into doing everything in his power for your recognition.

Which doesn't seem to be very hard to gain as he notices that you're a bit popular in class.

Not entirely popular, but if students come up to you they'll only get a sweet greeting every time as if they're a long-time friend of yours.

You're basically Koro-sensei's golden child. Wide sparkling eyes every time you put your hand up in class to you answer his questions, he could weep at how adorable you are.

Everyone comes up to you for anything really.

Help with homework, a quick check in, or just to talk. You're always so easy to talk to, so gentle all the time.

Even Itona will quietly chat with you in a corner.

You're just so...approachable.

In Karma's eyes that's unfair. He needs to catch your attention and now.

Maybe to prove something to himself or just boredom, he doesn't need a reason.

So now he's the one asking for homework help. He can answer the questions in his sleep, you know it too.

He's still gonna play dumb, tap you on the shoulder and muster up his best clueless look.

Even in class, Karma has "coincidentally" managed to switch seats to be your desk partner.

You didn't hear it from me but maybe an octopus-like teacher has something to do with that.

Anyway.

Now that you're basically knee to knee with him in class, this allows karma to charm his way into your every day life.

Constantly stealing away your time with anything he can possibly think of.

He'll do this thing where he just wraps his arms around your shoulders and sultry whine into your ear.

"_____, help me please?"

He'll even throw in a pout.

Nagisa has to pry him off of you.

You don't even ask why he's suddenly around you nearly 24/7, you're just glad to be of help really and though you think he's a bit strange he's quite sweet.

A well known charismatic (possible) sadist, but sweet.

Class trip? He's sitting next to you on the bus.

Getting ice-cream? He already knows your favourite flavour.

Study session? You'll need to work together, being the two top students in class it would only be sensible to partner up for academics. This lead to him coming over a lot and vice versa, need to keep those grades up you know.

Spending the weekend at home? Don't be silly, you're flying to the country of your choice on a whim with a certain red-haired 'friend' of yours.

Having rich absent parents really does come in handy sometimes.

But this whole game is tiring him out.

You've gotten close, yes. He's flustered you plenty, yes. But you haven't confessed to him at all!

It's infuriating.

He wants you to like him at least, because he's teetering on the edge of obsession for you.

Because 'friends' don't hold hands all the time, they don't hug longingly or stay up late thinking of the other.

It'll all click in to place when he just goes red in the face, kisses your cheek once and just spews his feeling out like a flood.

"I like you."

"...Oh."

(⁠ ⁠╹⁠▽⁠╹⁠ )

Coughing, he'll look away and pretend like nothing happened while trying desperately to renew his previous charm.

can the ground just open up and swallow him already, oh god.

“I…like you too.” you shyly smile

karma.exe has stopped working

[iheartambss]

You are the best thing that's ever been mine

Clarisse La Rue x Fem!PoseidonCabin!Reader

summary: You and Clarisse have been anonymous pen pals and when identities are revealed it all goes south

warnings: swearing, slight angst, fluff, Clarisse is kinda a bitch at first, not proof read

a/n: I hope this is what you wanted! I added a little twist to it, I hope that's ok. I may have self projected just a bit, the request didn't say a specific cabin so l put mine. Yes I'm a cabin 3 girlie. I had to write in the catradora line, it would’ve bothered me if I didn't take the opportunity. Best wing girl award goes to… Amaris! Amaris is in cabin 6 aka Athena btw. I actually had a lot of fun writing Amaris and Y/n's friendship hehe. Also if you’d like to listen to the song while reading there’s a link below :)

Mine by Taylor Swift

You and Clarisse have been anonymous pen pals for a couple months now. You accidentally left a note you had written where you talked about your favorite book which coincidentally was Clarisse's too and ever since you both have been leaving notes for each on the very same spot every day, every few days or even every week. You don't like Clarisse because she bullies other campers and Clarisse doesn't like you because you're one of the only people who have actually stood up to her, at least, that’s what she tells herself.

You watch as Clarisse shoved Percy then proceeded to push him on the floor with a frown. You walk up to Clarisse after you watched the girl walk away from Percy, "Leave the new kid alone princess. Quit being a bitch," You hiss as you cross your arms. Clarisse's brows furrow, "Did you just call me a bitch?" She takes a threatening step towards you, "Why don't you come closer and say that again?" Her tone is challenging.

You stepped closer to the girl and looked up at Clarisse, "Quit being a bitch princess.” You said the word ‘princess’ in the same mocking tone you always did. Clarisse's eyes flash with anger and she lunges forward, grabbing your shirt and pulling you close so your faces are inches apart. You gave her a smug smile before your smile shifted into a smirk and ignored the hammering of your heart, "What? You gonna kiss me or something princess?" You teased.

A scowl settles on Clarisse's features when she feels her cheeks flush and she roughly shoves you away from her, "You're so fucking infuriating" She spits. You give her another smug smile as you shrug, "I try" then you turn around and leave. Clarisse watches you go with a mix of frustration and satisfaction. She turns around, muttering under her breath about you before heading back to her cabin.

-

The next day, you walked around the library and went to grab the note in your favorite book but before you could, Clarisse snatched the book from you. Her eyes are wide and she looks nervous like she’s hiding something. "What are you doing?" Clarisse demands, holding the book against her chest protectively. "Why does it matter Clarisse?" You said, rolling your eyes before reaching out towards the book, "Give me the book."

"No." Clarisse crosses her arms over the book, "You’re just trying to sneak a peek at my notes." She hisses, taking a step closer to you as her eyes narrowed. You looked at the Ares girl with wide eyes like you had just seen a ghost, "Your notes?..." You asked softly. Clarisse finally lets out a small sigh, her eyes still narrowed as she watches you, "Yeah, my notes." She nods, "Why are you so interested in them anyways?" Her brow furrows in confusion.

"Clarisse... I'm the one who’s been writing you," You replied softly, thinking about everything you’ve talked about and how sweet the Ares girl was in contrast to her normal demeanor. Clarisse's eyes widened in surprise, and she took a step back, "What?" She stammers, looking at you like you've grown another head. She glances down at the book in her arms, then back up to you, "You've... been writing me?"

You nod, "I mean if you've been writing notes and leaving them in that book then yes," You point to the book in Clarisse's arms. Clarisse looks at the book then back up to you, her cheeks flushing slightly. “Oh," She mutters, running her fingers through her hair, seemingly at a loss for words. She looks conflicted about the whole thing before she decides to do what she does best in these type of situations, run. After a moment, Clarisse clears her throat, "I have to go," then she shoves the book in your hands before quickly taking her leave.

-

You tried to find Clarisse to talk to her but you couldn't find the girl anywhere. You’d catch a glimpse of her at times but the minute you’d try to walk over to her, she's gone. After a while of the same dance, you’ve realized she’s been avoiding you and it was driving you crazy. All you can think about is how sweet the girl was to you when you both didn't know who the other was. You always found the Ares girl attractive and had a little crush on her but that little crush grew into something bigger once you realized that she was the one you were writing the whole time.

You’re currently with your best friend, Amaris, laying in her bed as you talk. "Am, I can't stop thinking about her," You sighed. Amaris looks at you, a small smile playing on her lips. "You mean the girl who's been avoiding you for two weeks?" She teases gently. "Well, maybe it's time to confront her then." You look at Amaris with wide eyes, "That's like the worst advice you could give me when it comes to Clarisse," You mumble, "Who knows how she'll react.” Amaris shrugs, propping her chin on her hand. "So you can keep stewing in uncertainty, or you can take the plunge and see what happens. Either way, you're not going to stop thinking about her until you try."

You look at Amaris, still uncertain. "What would I even say to her?" Amaris grins mischievously, "How about ‘I know you’ve been avoiding me for a while, but I can't stop thinking about you.' Something like that should get her attention." You laugh softly, "Yeah that could get her attention I guess. Maybe a fist to the face too if she's generous enough." “Well, you know what they say, 'Nothing ventured, nothing gained'." Amaris winks, clearly enjoying teasing you. "And hey, maybe she'll surprise you. You never know with her." You nod, "I'll try to talk to her tonight at the bonfire."

"Good luck. You're gonna need it," Amaris says playfully. "Don't forget to let me know how it goes." You blew a kiss to Amaris, "Thanks. I will Am," then you hug her before leaving the Athena cabin. With a smile, Amaris watches as you leave. She takes a deep breath and exhales slowly, knowing that things might get interesting tonight.

-

That night, you muster up all the courage you can and head to the bonfire. The air is filled with laughter and music as campers gather around, enjoying each others company. As you approach the bonfire, you see Amaris chatting with a group of other campers. She notices you and gives you a small wave before turning back to her friends. Taking a deep breath, you make your way over to her. You put your hand on Amaris' shoulder and smile, "Hey Am." Amaris turns to look at you, her face softening into a warm smile. "Hey Y/n," she replies, gesturing for you to join the group.

You smile as you greet Amaris' friends before looking back at her, "Girl, who are you trying to impress today?" You tease, "You look hot." Amaris rolls her eyes, but can't help but smile as she replies, "I always look good babes and you look pretty damn hot yourself." She nudges you gently, a mischievous glint in her eye. You grin, gently nudging the girl back, "Flattery will get you no where Am." Amaris raises an eyebrow at you, clearly enjoying the playful banter between the two of you. "Well then," she says with a grin, "Maybe I should start thinking about upping the ante."

You look at Amaris, giving her a playful apologetic look. "Sorry babes, my heart belongs to another." Amaris laughs lightly, the sound filling the air. "Ah yes, I remember hearing about that certain someone." She teases. "Have you seen her?" You shake your head, "Not yet. Have you?" Amaris shrugs her shoulders, "I saw her head to the bathroom with some of the Ares kids. I think she went to give the new kid their welcome gift." You frown at that, “You think she’d learn her lesson after Percy.” "You gonna go find your knight in shining armor?" Amaris says with a mischievous grin.

You sigh softly, "Yeah, I might go look for her in a bit." Amaris smiles warmly, her eyes sparkling with amusement. "Well remember, when you do, don’t forget to let me know. l'd love to hear all about it." She takes a sip of her drink and adds casually, "Good luck." You nod, "I know, I know. Thanks Am." Amaris waves her hand dismissively, a small smile playing on her lips. "Always," She says before gently nudging you and gesturing at something, "The princess has arrived." You turn to look at what Amaris gestured to and see Clarisse. Your heart skips a beat as you take in how beautiful the girl looks.

Clarisse wore a red crop top and black cargo pants. You couldn’t help but think the girl looked absolutely breathtaking, she always did. Amaris looks at you with a smug grin, "Careful lovergirl, you might start drooling," She teases. You turn to look at Amaris, blushing softly as you roll your eyes, "Shut up." Amaris bursts out laughing, shaking her head at you playfully. "All right, all right," She chuckles, taking another sip of her drink. "Go talk to your princess then." You look at Amaris, uncertain, "I'm beginning to think this is a bad idea Am. What if she makes fun of me?"

Amaris rolls her eyes, "And how is that different from any other day? Just go talk to her." You nod and take a deep breath, walking over to Clarisse before you can change your mind again, "Hey princess." Despite all the other times you've called her princess, this one came out soft, not mocking like it usually does. Clarisse sighs before looking up at you with a raised eyebrow, "What do you want?" She asks bluntly. "You," You reply casually before blushing when you realize what you said. "I mean you cause I want to talk to you," You stutter out.

Clarisse can't help but smirk at your blush and stuttering. "Well, aren't you sweet?" She says sarcastically. "I don't want to talk to you." You frown, slightly hurt by her words, "Just answer one question and I'll leave you alone. Please." Clarisse narrows her eyes at you, "What's the question?" She asks warily. "Why have you been avoiding me?" You ask softly. Clarisse sighs again, clearly not expecting that question. She shrugs lightly, trying to play it off casually. "I wasn't avoiding you. Just, you know... busy training."

"Bullshit," You reply. "Every time I see you and try to talk to you, you disappear." Clarisse rolls her eyes. "Look, I don't want to talk about it. So just leave me alone." She says firmly, turning away from you. You frown, "Clarisse just tell me the truth.” "The truth? Fine," Clarisse snaps, turning back to face you with fire in her eyes. "I was avoiding you because I'm not interested in some pathetic little crush you have on me," She shouts, the words coming out harsher than she intended. You felt your heart shatter and tears well up in your eyes.

Clarisse's eyes widen and she internally winces at the sight of you trying to hold back tears. For a moment, she feels a pang of guilt, but quickly pushes it aside. You look around, feeling eyes on you before looking back at Clarisse. "Ok… got it. I’ll leave you alone" and with that you walk away from the Ares girl. You kept walking even as you heard Amaris call out for you and left the bonfire. Clarisse's eyes narrow at Amaris, she felt a pang of jealousy course through her which changed to satisfaction as she watched you ignore her and continue walking. Amaris turns to Clarisse and walks over to her, "What the fuck did you say to her?" She said, glaring at the Ares girl.

Clarisse shrugs nonchalantly. "I told her to leave me alone," she explains. "I'm clearly not interested in being friends with her." She takes a sip of her drink, unfazed by Amaris' glare. Amaris rolls her eyes, "Me and you both know that's total bullshit La Rue," she spat before adding, "I've seen the way you look at her, even before you realized she was the one writing you." Clarisse's expression becomes cold and defensive. "What are you talking about?" she asks sharply. "I don't look at her like anything." She steps closer to Amaris, their eyes locked in a fierce stare down.

Amaris looks up at Clarisse, seething at her. "Cut the shit Clarisse. I know you like her, it's so obvious. You stare at her as if you were in love with her." A small spark of irritation flashes in Clarisse's eyes. She's not used to people seeing through her. "Fine," she says through gritted teeth. "If you must know, yes, I do have feelings for her." "You two are fucking stupid. You don't want to admit you like her, she can't and won't believe you like her no matter how many times I tell her," Amaris adds. "Stop being a fucking jackass and go find her. Y/n is one of the sweetest girls I know and she’s madly in love with you. You'd be fucking dumb as fuck to pass up the opportunity to be with a girl as amazing as her."

Clarisse is taken aback by Amaris' words. She can't deny that she feels something for you but she's not used to expressing her emotions in such a vulnerable way. "You're right," she says, taking a deep breath. Amaris grins, "Of course I'm right, I'm always right. Now get the fuck out of here. Y/n's probably by the river near cabin 3." Nodding, Clarisse heads out towards the river, her heart pounding in anticipation. She's nervous but determined to express her feelings to you. After a brief walk, Clarisse spots you sitting by the river, you head bowed as you dangle your feet in the water. Clarisse approaches cautiously, clearing her throat to get your attention.

You turn around to face Clarisse with a tear stained face, your eyes widening when you realize it's the Ares girl. Clarisse's heart sinks at the sight of you. She knows she's the reason for your pain, and it hurts her deeply. "Y/n," Clarisse says softly, taking a seat next to you on the riverbank. "I just wanted to apologize for earlier." She swallows hard, feeling her cheeks redden a bit. "I... I might have been a bit harsh with you." You look at Clarisse, giving her an unimpressed look. "Oh you think?" You snap sarcastically. Clarisse internally winces at your harsh tone, but she understands your anger. "I guess I deserved that," she says, hanging her head in shame. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have treated you like that."

You look away from her and towards the river, thinking for a moment before turning back to Clarisse. "Gonna have to come up with something better than that." Clarisse takes a deep breath, gathering her courage. "Y/n, I'm really sorry for how I acted earlier," she says, looking into your eyes earnestly. "I was wrong to treat you that way. You mean a lot to me and I hope you'll give me another chance to make it up to you." "You know it's funny cause Amaris would tell me you liked me back all the time but I never wanted to confess because I knew there was no way l'd ever have a chance with you. I guess I was right," You said as you wiped tears off your face.

Clarisse frowns, Amaris told her this but hearing it from you somehow made it worse. How could you believe you'd never have a chance with her? "But you do have a chance Y/n," she replied, adding, "Don't you get it? I love you. I've always have." You look at Clarisse with wide eyes, "Then why did you avoid me like I was the plague? Why didn't you say that back at the bonfire?" You ask softly, like you’re scared that you might scare the Ares girl away. Clarisse swallows hard as she avoided your gaze. "I-I didn't know how to react back then. All my life, I've hidden my vulnerability just so l wouldn't seem weak to my father...and I know that's obviously no excuse for my behavior but that’s why. I'm so so sorry Y/n. I never meant to hurt you.”

You look away from Clarisse again and think about something before speaking up. "Just promise me you'll try to be more vulnerable with me in the future Clar,” you say softly before turning back to the Ares girl. Clarisse's eyes widened in surprise at your request. She didn't know if she could make such a promise, but she knew she wanted to try for you. "I promise I'll try Y/n." You smile softly in response and stay silent, taking in how beautiful the Ares girl looked under the moonlight. Clarisse gazed back at you with an intensity that made your heart flutter. "You're so beautiful angel," She murmured softly. Your soft smile turned into a grin at the compliment and you could feel butterflies forming in your stomach.

"And you're gorgeous princess," You mumbled just as soft. Clarisse's cheeks flushed at your compliment. "Thank you," she whispered, feeling a warmth spread through her chest. She moved closer to you, unable to resist the urge to be more near you. Your eyes flickered between Clarisse's eyes and her lips. You resisted the urge to lean in, still scared of the possibility of scaring the Ares girl away. Clarisse sensed your hesitation, but she didn't want to push you away. She wanted to be close to you, to feel the warmth of your presence. "Can I kiss you angel?" She asked softly. You nod immediately, leaning in just a bit to meet Clarisse half way.

Clarisse's heart was racing as your lips met in a soft, tentative kiss. It was unlike any kiss she had ever experienced before; filled with tenderness and vulnerability that she had never allowed herself to show. She deepened the kiss, feeling warmth spreading through her body. You return the kiss with a soft smile, feeling like your heart is beating out of your chest. Clarisse's hands moved up to cup your face, her fingers tangling in your hair as she lost herself in the kiss. It was like a spark had ignited inside of her, and she couldn't get enough.

You pulled away from the kiss, breathing heavily, "Does this mean we're dating now?" You asked softly, trying to hide your hopeful tone of voice. Clarisse rolled her eyes at you but she couldn’t hide the smile on her face, "Yes," she replied simply. “We're dating dumbass." She leaned in to kiss you again, but paused, looking into your eyes. "I know it's probably too early for this but I already said it so fuck it... I love you Y/n." You look at Clarisse with adoration in your eyes and grin, "I love you too Clarisse," then you closed the distance and pulled her into another kiss.

[kp-alice]

The Fall of the Undefeated One

Summary: Your boss is the epitome of a workplace bully, pressuring everyone to work overtime even through sick days and family emergencies. Most infuriatingly, though, no one has ever dared to go against him - until now, that is.

AKA blackmailed boss!sub!Yunho x sadistic!dom!f!reader

Word count: 5 505

Warnings: While I made it obvious multiple times that this is all roleplay, I still want to give a huge warning for !!!!!CNC!!!!!, blackmailing, forced feminization, pegging, taking photos during sex, crying, begging and just resisting in general (though Yunho is just pretending obv), blowjobs (f rec), Yunho gets slapped once, checking in on each other mid-scene, some pretty dark dialogue (esp at the end)

A/N: This fic is the fifth part of my sub!Yunho Kinktober 2024! The event's masterlist can be found here.

"So you're absolutely, totally, one hundred percent sure you want to do this?"

"I've only told you like fifty times but yes, I am definitely, completely, one thousand percent sure."

"And you'll tell me if you want to stop?"

"Just like you'll tell me if you want to stop."

"Alright, then. See you next Friday, 'boss'."

You were sitting in your office, checking various reports and scheduling meetings for next week as usual. As Mr. Jeong's secretary, you had your own office instead of sharing a cubicle with other employees. It didn't stop you from chatting with them during lunch break, however, which led you to some very interesting information.

Contrary to your initial belief, it wasn't just you who your boss decided to be extra stern towards. As you quickly realized, the entire department was permanently overworked and underpaid, all thanks to the one man at the top. And the most infuriating thing about it all? No one dared to stand up against him. Even if they were living off 3 hours of sleep every day, even if they were denied holiday to visit their families in a dire situation, everyone just hung their heads low and obliged. The company had an incredible reputation, after all, and nobody wanted to lose a chance to write it down in their resume during their next hunt for a job. And even if someone did decide to stand up for themselves, all it took was the smallest, vaguest threat from Mr. Jeong about how other hiring companies would hear about this behavior and all protests would immediately cease.

There was nothing you could do about it, either. All you could do was just watch on as the bullying went on, shaking your head in quiet disappointment.

Until you'd also been wronged by your boss.

"What do you mean, 'paid overtime'?" Mr. Jeong mocked you right to your face. "What you call overtime, I call the bare minimum, sweetheart. I don't care if your mother is sick or your rent is past due, you only get paid for the work you've done, no charity. If you think this is too much for you, feel free to leave anytime. Don't expect to be hired anywhere else, though, every reputable company around here would love to hear my opinion on your performance before hiring you."

You were stunned, rage quietly boiling within at the audacity of the asshole in front of you. Every day for the past month and a half, because of his impossible demands, you'd been working two to four hours extra just to meet each deadline. You barely had time to sleep, let alone actually live your own life and talk to friends and family, and this is how he decided to treat you?

"Glad we settled that, then. Now go make yourself useful and bring me those copies from yesterday's meeting, will you?"

That day, you decided that your boss, Mr. Jeong Yunho himself, would pay dearly; both for what he'd done to you and to the other workers.

For the next three weeks, you dug through every file and article you could find in the office and online, desperately searching for anything big you could use against him. And, by some miracle, you found one. A real big one, in fact.

This was it. You had him in the palm of your hand, even if he didn't know it yet.

A knock came at your door, making you look up from the report you were currently working on.

"I expect to hear a very good reason for coming here right this instant, Miss L/N," was the first thing he said as he walked into the room, visibly angered. God forbid he had to approach someone for once instead of everyone crawling to him.

"Oh, don't worry Mr. Jeong, I'm sure you'll find what I'm about to tell you very interesting," you smirked as you spoke, gesturing for him to sit down on the small couch near your desk.

"Get to it then, darling, I really don't have time for this," Mr. Jeong commanded, yet again slipping a condescending pet name in to try and throw you off. Typical.

It wasn't you who was surprised, however, when you suddenly stood up, walked over to the door, and locked it. "Be patient, Jeong. If you don't want to fuck up any more than you already have, I suggest you behave yourself."

His mouth hung open, fully taken aback by this new attitude of yours. Perhaps you had a death wish, speaking to him like that, or maybe, you had just gone completely insane. Either way, he was excited to show you why you should never, ever, do that again.

But before he could say anything, you were already back at your desk, turning your laptop to face him.

"As your hard-working and thorough secretary, I've gone back on some reports and files from this year, and you'll never believe what I found!" You said with fake excitement, eyes shining. "If you look really closely, you can see each worker's salary, and then here is the amount of money they should have actually been given each month according to the government-mandated minimum wage. Care to explain why those numbers are vastly different and why none of us were notified about a raise in salary, Mr. Jeong?"

Yunho's eyes widened as he scanned the document, recognizing the spreadsheet he'd secretly made for himself to keep track of all the cuts he'd been taking from everyone's salaries. He could have sworn he'd kept the file fully private, likely even password-protected, yet, somehow, you'd managed to get your hands on it.

"Why are you- how did you get that?!" He finally said, trying to suppress the sudden anxiety churning his stomach. "Those are private files and you have no right to be looking through them! Go pack your things immediately, because you are fired - and I'm being very merciful with that decision."

"Oh, if only it was that simple, Jeong," you replied cunningly. "You can fire me all you want, but once these files go public, your reputation, company, and maybe even life will be over, I'm afraid. And we wouldn't want that now, would we?"

Yunho gritted his teeth, looking down as he considered his options.

"...Alright. What do you want me to do?"

Despite your best efforts, you barked out a laugh at his question, too amused by the cold facade he was still fighting so hard to keep. "There we go, finally on the right path! You're not the one making demands here, Jeong, I am. If you want to preserve everything you've managed to build so far, you better start listening to me and me only."

Yunho let out a deep, frustrated sigh, refusing to admit you were right. If any of this information were to get out into the public, his entire professional life would be over in an instant. Just as you'd said, he was completely at your mercy right now.

"Well, what do you want then? Money? A promotion? A transfer to a different company? What?"

"Strip."

...

Yunho's entire world paused the second you'd said it, freezing him in place. He had to have heard you wrong, right? There was simply no way you could have said something like that to someone like him.

"W-what?"

You let out a sigh yourself, frustrated with how uncooperative your superior was being. This was the guy demanding Herculean tasks from his subordinates on a daily basis?

"I said strip, Jeong."

His breath hitched at your angry tone, chest tightening to an almost painful degree.

"Y-you can't be serious, there's no way that-"

"What part of 'I can ruin your entire career in seconds' did you not understand?" You spat, sending a shiver down Yunho's spine. "The company or your pride, your choice."

A heavy silence hung in the air for an uncomfortably long time, turning Yunho's cheeks a deep red. He didn't know what was worse - the fact he was actually considering doing it or the fact that you knew he was considering it, judging by his lack of a response.

"...How much?"

You looked at him in confusion, swinging one leg over the other before leaning closer to his nervous form. He was clearly nervous, playing with his fingers, one leg bouncing up and down.

"'How much' what?" You finally asked back.

"How much do I have to take off?"

You snorted at the question, making him look up into your eyes. "What do you think, Jeong? Just stand up and start undressing; I'll tell you when to stop."

Yunho gulped at your words, eyes shaking. Never in your years of dating had he seen such a cold, sadistic expression on your face. Somehow, it was both incredibly intimidating and extremely arousing.

Trying his best to ignore his trembling hands, he stood up on two weak legs and reached for his suit jacket. A whimper threatened to spill past his lips as he finally undid the first button, feeling like he could just break down and cry right now from the overwhelming humiliation.

"Oh my god," you marveled, leaning back to enjoy the show, "you're actually doing it! And here I was worried I'd have to threaten you with something even bigger, yet all it took was a few words and you're already doing whatever I say."

"You know very well it's not just a 'few words'!" Yunho hissed indignantly. "If my entire future didn't depend on this, I would never-"

"Shut the fuck up and do as you're told before I get angry, Jeong," you growled back, making him immediately back down again. His hands were visibly shaking now, eliciting a few quiet curses from him as he struggled with the remaining button.

At last, he was able to get the garment off, looking at you to see if he could stop now. But your expression remained stoic, leaving him with no other choice.

Tears of humiliation stung in his eyes as he began working on his shirt but he bit them back, absolutely refusing to cry in front of you. Soon, the shirt joined his discarded suit jacket on the floor.

"Wow," you said appreciatively, unabashedly ogling his chest. "Who would have thought the office asshole had such nice tits. This is even more fun than I had imagined."

It took every ounce of willpower in him not to react to your comment, desperately wanting to but knowing it would just make everything so much worse.

"What are you waiting for?" You asked impatiently. "I didn't say you could stop yet, did I?"

"Miss L/N, you can't possibly be serious-"

"What would your family think if they found out how you treat your employees? Your father is a reputable business owner himself, isn't he?"

"I- well, yes, but- fuck," Yunho muttered to himself, trying not to let the growing despair take over. His pristinely ironed pants pooled around his feet before he stepped out of them and gave you one more hopeful look. When he was met with nothing, he sighed, taking off his socks as well before looking up again. Surely, this had to be enough, right? Right?

Silence.

Yunho's hands shook at the realization of what the silence implied, unable to bring himself to remove the last piece of clothing he still had on. Your gaze on him was unwavering, watching his every move and expression like a hawk ready to swoop in.

Which is why you also noticed the signs of genuine anxiety in him very quickly.

"What's your color, Jeong?" You asked as neutrally as you could, not wanting to fully break the scene but still wanting to check in on him.

"Green, it's green, I just-" Yunho took a deep, shaky breath, balling his fists by his sides, "I just can't get my hands to listen to me, I'm sorry."

"Listen, Jeong," you began, standing up to approach your shaking lover. "I'm going to be very generous right now and take it off for you, okay? But you can't expect me to help you with everything you're the one in trouble. Understood?"

Yunho gave you a quick, thankful nod, lips pressed into a thin line as he watched your fingers slip under the waistband of his underwear. Then, in one swift motion, you tugged the garment down, leaving him completely bare in front of you.

"There you go," you whispered softly, stepping back to admire the view. Yunho's hands did their best to cover himself but it was not exactly effective, considering your amused face. "What? Feeling shy? Don't worry, sweetheart, I have just the clothes for you."

Yunho was confused by the sudden, surprisingly nice gesture until he saw the clothes in question.

"Go on," you encouraged, shoving the clothes into his arms, "make yourself pretty."

A tear rolled down his eye as he looked at the mix of pink and white, but he quickly turned away and wiped it off, still trying to keep some semblance of dignity.

"Now, Jeong," you began, back in your office chair, one leg crossed over the other, "I'm going to give you a choice. I'm afraid you have no say in what's going to happen next, but you can decide how it will go. Do you want it the easy way, or the hard way, hm?"

Yunho meekly sat on the couch, keeping his hands in his lap to prevent the pink skirt from riding up even higher than it already had. The white thigh highs on his legs didn't do much to keep him warm, sending small shivers up his spine.

"The easy way, please."

"Good boy," you praised him, though there was no actual warmth to your words. "Close your eyes and don't open them until I say so."

Yunho complied, feeling like this was one of the simpler tasks you could have given him, yet it also gave him no clue as to what to expect. He didn't dare think about what might happen, fearing you were going to subvert his expectations anyway.

And subvert them you did.

"Open, Jeong."

Yunho's mouth hung agape as he looked at your hips, fully bare save for the leather harness secured around them. What stood out even more to him, though, and quite literally at that, was the silicone cock fastened to said harness.

"Come over here and get on your knees, if you'd be so kind."

Yunho was yet again frozen solid, unable to process what he was seeing. "I-I'm sorry, but have you gone absolutely insane?"

You chuckled at his incredulous tone, taking a step toward him. "Oh? I thought you just said you wanted to do this the easy way, what's with the attitude?"

"I don't know if you forgot who the fuck I am, L/N," Yunho gritted through his teeth, leaning forward to try and match your tone, "but you better snap out of this power trip right now or-"

"Or what?!" You finally snapped, startling the man back into his seat. "What are you going to do, Jeong? Lose your entire career because you were too proud to be under someone for once? Is that what matters to you the most?"

Yunho panted as he looked at you with nothing but disdain.

Letting out a sigh, you gestured back to your laptop, clicking over to the next tab in your browser. "Since you couldn't play nice, let me up the ante a bit. If you look over here, you can see a few emails that are ready to be sent at any minute. A lot of them, in fact. Wanna know who they're addressed to?"

He stayed silent, refusing to play your disgusting games.

"Don't worry, I'll tell you anyway," you grinned, scrolling down the list. "Here we have each of your family members, every single employee in your company, your 20 biggest competitors, journalists, workplace inspectors, and a few dozen more big contacts. With a single click, they'll all learn the truth within minutes, evidence included."

Yunho's face fell at the sight. "Y-Y/N, Miss Y/N, please..."

"Begging won't change my mind, Jeong," you spat, leaving the tab open as you walked back in front of him, "but actions just might."

Tears once again threatened to spill past his eyes, throat squeezing uncomfortably tight as he suppressed them. He couldn't cry. Not like this, not in front of you.

Swallowing back a whimper, Yunho slowly shuffled forward, all the way to the edge of the couch, before sinking down to the floor. You watched on with a satisfied smirk, lips curling even further up as his eyes met the fake cock in front of him again.

Oh god, he was really going to do this.

Trying to keep his hands as steady as possible, he reached for the strap-on, feeling it under his fingertips before wrapping a hand around the base. Angling the tip to his mouth, Yunho closed his eyes and let out a deep sigh before finally diving forward.

You stared at him in awe as his lips wrapped around the sizable tip, brows furrowing while he tried to push deeper. "There you go, good boy," you praised in a sickly sweet tone, resting one of your hands in his hair. His other hand that wasn't gripping the base of your cock fisted his skirt instead, likely trying to keep his gag reflex at bay while he sunk further down.

When his lips met his own fist, he let his throat rest for a bit, trying to breathe as best as he could despite the big piece of silicone in his mouth. After a few long, uncomfortable seconds, he decided to start moving again, giving a few experimental bobs with his head. On the fourth one, though, he audibly gagged, throat spasming while he quickly dove back up for air. You silently watched as he coughed and gasped for air, leaning to the side with his palms against the floor.

Once he got his breathing under control again, he looked up at you, meeting your gaze for the first time in a while. You smiled back down at him, a genuine smile this time, and used the opportunity to mouth a quick "All good?" to him. His eyes sparkled in excitement as he happily nodded back, calming any potential worries.

A quick tug at his hair was all it took for him to snap back into the scene.

"Did I say you could stop, Jeong? We haven't even gotten to the main course yet."

Just as Yunho began asking what you meant by that, he was shoved back onto the dildo, giving him no more than a second to prepare. You slid back into his mouth with ease, not too deep to make him choke, but deep enough to get his attention again. "Or do I have to show you another incentive to keep going?"

With a small grunt, Yunho shook his head as best as he could given his position and got back to work. He made sure you saw as he diligently sucked on the tip, swirling his tongue around it before pushing further down. If he had no choice but to do this, he might as well get it over with. Soon enough, he could almost take the whole thing in his mouth. You caressed his hair gently, a small show of praise that wouldn't break the scene too much.

The hand in his hair quickly turned more domineering, however, as you suddenly tightly clutched the strands, warning him of what was likely to come.

His prediction turned out to be spot-on as you began to pull him back up by his hair, only to push him back down again and start all over. Yunho could do nothing but let you move him as you wanted, desperately willing his lungs and throat to calm down so that he wouldn't choke again. Or too badly, at least.

Small, wet sounds filled the room as you moved him up and down on the strap-on, using both hands now to steady his head while you picked up the pace. A tear or two rolled down his cheeks this time, but you knew it was no reason to celebrate just yet. These were just a natural response to you fucking his throat, not a sign of you actually breaking him.

That would have to come later, it seemed.

"On the couch," you ordered curtly, pulling him off you at once. He was left hunched over, face bright red and lungs heaving for air.

Once your words finally registered for him, he willed his limbs to move again, crawling up on the couch. You wasted no time with him anymore, manhandling him into the desired position.

As much as he hated to admit it, Yunho's fight was faltering. His tightly clenched jaw had relaxed, giving way to the tired pants leaving his body. All snarky remarks and threats were long gone, his head too much of a muddy mess to come up with anything smart to say. You could feel it too, how much more pliant he'd grown under your touch, letting you press his upper half into the couch cushions.

When he heard the click of a bottle cap opening, some of that fight rushed back, only to leave just as quickly with a single reminder from you about what was at stake for him.

Yunho let out a quiet grunt as a finger breached him from behind, still hell-bent on hiding his reactions from you. He knew you'd revel in it, in every moan and beg and whimper, which is exactly why he could never give any of it to you. Until that dam broke, he could pretend he still had some dignity left.

"I advise you to relax as much as you can, Jeong," you spoke softly, burying your finger inside of him to the last knuckle before pulling back again, "otherwise this is going to hurt quite a bit."

"You're sick," Yunho spat back but quickly shut up again as you pressed in a second finger, causing a whine to almost push past his lips.

"So? What are you gonna do about it?" You asked back. The satisfaction within you only grew when he had nothing to say to that, too scared to admit the truth.

So far, Yunho was faring quite well. The biggest sign of this having even the slightest effect on him was how hard he was gripping the couch cushions, but that was about it. And it was exactly because of that that you began to grow bored.

Time to make him speak up.

Curling your fingers, you began angling your hand this way and that way, until-

"Fuck!" Yunho cried out, involuntarily clenching around your hand. You watched as his thighs quivered and his back arched, trying to simultaneously push back against you and fight the urge to do so at all costs.

"What was that?" You taunted, focusing on that specific spot you'd found while your other hand roamed along his hip. "Is someone starting to enjoy themselves? And here I thought I was the sick one?"

"Shut- ah! Shut the fuck up!" Yunho moaned out, eyes tightly shut as he tried to fight the onslaught of pleasure. He knew he couldn't help it, that it was just his body's natural reaction to being stimulated, and yet, he couldn't help but feel betrayed by it as well. He fought so hard to keep any and all noises at bay, only to then completely crumble without any say in the matter.

Then, without warning, your fingers pulled out of him, leaving him empty and clenching around nothing. Every instinct in his body was screaming at him to get up, to run far away from whatever the fuck this was, yet his mind knew very well it would be of no use. Not when your hand was back on his hip again, bringing his ass closer as you poured more lube over his hole.

"Hmm, no, this won't do," you thought out loud, looking at the way Yunho was presenting for you.

In the blink of an eye, he was flipped on his back, legs forced apart to accommodate you between them. Your strap was now peeking at him from behind his own half-hard cock, making his cheeks heat up. How was that thing bigger than he was? Moreover, what the hell were you planning to do with it?

"Say cheese!"

A bright light flashed into Yunho's eyes, making them squint in discomfort. When they managed to refocus, however, he was met with a sight somehow even more horrifying than all the evidence on your laptop.

A camera.

You were holding a camera and taking photos of him with it. Photos of him in a state like this.

"W-what are you- what?" Yunho stumbled out, voice laced with genuine horror.

"What does it look like I'm doing, Jeong?" You asked back, flipping his skirt up to show his prepped and needy hole. Another click and a flash of light.

The third snap finally managed to break him out of his trance, and his hand immediately shot up to grab your wrist.

"Ow! What the-" You hissed out in pain, almost dropping the camera to the ground. "That shit's expensive, you idiot!"

Yunho either didn't hear your words or simply ignored them, too busy trying to wrestle the camera from your hand. Doing sexual favors for you to save his business was one thing, he was already too deep in to stop that, but this? Oh, no, no no no, he was not going to just let you get even more dirt on him. Sure, he might have sold his body today to try and save his career, but he was NOT letting you trap him into a vicious cycle of blackmailing. He knew exactly how these things went, he knew you wouldn't be satisfied with just today, he knew you'd just keep demanding more and more from him and that-

A sharp sting dug into his cheek, the force of the slap turning his head to the side.

"I fucking told you to let go!"

The tight grip on your wrist eased up as you broke Yunho out of his spiral, preventing him from getting too deep into whatever inner chaos he tried to enter. His confused eyes met yours, studying your stern expression for a moment before he settled back into the scene, giving you a small nod as a sign to keep going.

"Before you try any of that shit again, I'll have you know that all of the photos I take on this are automatically backed up on my laptop. Breaking it does nothing except piss me off even further, and I don't think you want that, sweetheart."

Your hand slid up to grab his face, squishing his cheeks together.

"Now just accept your fate and let me take my pictures, hm? I don't think you want these to end up on the news tomorrow."

Yunho had no words left. No matter how his mind tried to twist this, there was no lie left that would convince him he had any sort of upper hand in this scenario. From the moment he walked into your office, his fate was sealed. Unlike everywhere else in his life, he didn't hold any power here. No amount of threats or intimidation could ever get him out of your grasp unless you yourself decided to let him go. He was yours to do with as you pleased.

All of those thoughts swirled around in his head as he lay under you, dressed like a girl, his entire body on display while you took as many photos as you wanted. He almost started to leave his body for a second, feeling too helpless to stay present in the moment any longer, but the feeling of cold, wet silicone pressing against him stopped him from doing so.

"Please..." Yunho said so quietly you almost didn't hear it, but it made you smile nonetheless.

"Please what, Jeong?"

Yunho took a deep breath but choked on it midway through as, finally, the first real tears spilled down his cheeks.

"Please don't do this, please."

Your pupils blew wide open at the sight before you, feeling a sudden high you'd never felt before. He - your boyfriend, the man everyone knew as a strong, independent, reliable guy, was now crying under you, lips trembling as he begged with a wobbly voice. Thanks to all the reassurances throughout the scene and the obvious hard-on between his legs, you didn't have to worry about his comfort or safety, letting you truly focus on the mental rush you were currently experiencing. The insane amount of trust between you felt almost palpable in that moment, an indescribable wave of tenderness so twisted yet so sweet it was almost overwhelming.

"Just let it happen, Jeong," you finally breathed out, eyes lidded as you reached down between the two of you. "Just let go and take it."

Yunho let out a watery whimper as you finally breached him with your strap, not caring to hide his noises anymore. He had nothing more to lose, after all.

The atmosphere shifted into something more quiet and subdued, yet simultaneously a thousand times more intense. Just like him, you had no more condescending comments and mean remarks left in you as everything had already been said.

Yunho was yours for the taking, and take you did.

With each snap of your hips, you pushed him further into that soft, pliant headspace of his. You could feel his muscles relax, going almost limp from the rush of it all. There was nothing in his head anymore, nothing but the physical sensations you were providing. More tears escaped his eyes as you leaned closer, hitting that sweet spot inside him with even more precision. Yunho rewarded each jab at his prostate with a small, punched-out noise, too hazy for anything more than that.

You watched his hips buck up when you wrapped your free hand around him, the other pulling him towards your thrusts by his hip. His breath hitched at the sensation, face scrunching up as you began to stroke up and down.

"Ready to cum, babe?" You whispered tenderly, causing him to open his eyes again.

"Yes, please," Yunho sniffled weakly, reaching up to grasp your shoulders for support.

Getting your sweet boyfriend over that imaginary edge took no more than two minutes after that, already too pent up from everything up until now to hold it any longer. You held him close as he seized up, chest arching into yours while he spilled into your hand.

You reached behind you for the tissue box on your side table, careful not to jostle Yunho around too much. He wrapped his legs around your waist, feeling too tender and small to let you go.

"Don't worry hun, I'm not going anywhere," you comforted him as you turned back around. You quickly wiped your dirty hand with one of the tissues before leaning forward and dabbing his tears away with another one. Handing him a third one, you helped him lift his head up to blow his nose before throwing all three tissues into a nearby bin.

As much as you wanted to debrief with him right then and there to make sure he really enjoyed himself, one look into his eyes assured you he was nowhere near ready for that right now. He looked content and comfortable, sure, but his eyes were still too distant for any complicated discussions and introspections.

So, you simply asked him what to do next.

"Can we just cuddle for a bit?" Yunho asked meekly, a small pout on his face as he extended his arms out for a hug. "We can clean up and talk after, but I just really need you right now."

You took him up on his offer with zero hesitation, snuggling into his embrace as close as you could. The position was a bit awkward from your position, given you were still lodged inside of him, but oh well.

A few minutes of curling up with your precious love bug never hurt anyone.

taglist: @justconniez @domribo @another-random-fanfic-blog @imrllytootiredforthis

Thank you for reading! And remember, feedback is always very appreciated! <3

[bonercoaster]

Fuckin the attitude out ya

Hey there! It's been a while since I last posted, life has been very wild. Long-story-short: moving is hard, school is hard, and life is hard, but I am alive and still writing. Here's some Frank Castle smut because why not?

WARNINGS: smut, a lil fluff, brat reader, brat tamer joel, cnc, there is a safeword and reader doesn’t want to use it because she wants it, vaginal sex, holding reader down

Frank grabs both of your wrists and holds them down with one of his massive hands while you try to squirm away from him. He’s too strong for you to break away. Frank looks you in the eye for a couple of seconds, menacingly, you know he is giving you a chance to say your safe word, but you just narrow your eyes at him trying to send as much malice his way as possible. His other hand grabs one of your knees pushing them to the side before he.........

“Nope!”, “FUCK no.”, “Absolutely not!”, “You must be outta yer damn mind sweetheart.” 

You’ve been at it for an hour, arguing with Frank about somehow taking an apprenticeship with Micro. You told Frank that it’s because Micro is one of the best, and although this may be true, the real reason is so you could keep tabs on your lover who is always somehow in perilous danger. You’re great with technology, discrete and very careful. But every time you think of another way to convince him, he just shoots you down. He’s at the kitchen table cleaning his guns while you pace back and forth offering reason after reason. 

“But baby I-” You start to plead again. 

“No.” Frank, stares you down. “I don’ give a rats ass what kind of bullshit reason you give me or how reasonable you think it sounds, you’re not gonna be involving yourself with this garbage.” 

“Frank! I’m miserable at my stupid job, and I just want a chance to learn from the best and make a difference. Is that so bad?” 

Pretending to consider and tossing his head side to side, with a faux impressed frown, Frank then says matter of factly– “Yes.” 

“UGH! You’re so infuriating, Jesus, Frank would it kill you to trust me a little?” You raise your voice at him in anger and walk away, slamming your office door and starting your work remotely for the day. 

_____ 

A couple of hours later, you hear a knock at your office door. “Come in!” 

Frank enters your office with a bag of chinese takeout and places it at the side of your desk. “Y’eat yet today, doll?” 

“Not hungry.” You glare at him, and continue typing away at your computer.

“C’mon it’s already 6 o’ clock, ya gotta eat something baby.” Frank pleads, making his deep raspy voice soft. 

“I don’t want your fucking food, Frank!” You say, raising your voice and rolling your eyes at him. He hates it when you roll your eyes at him, and you know that. You turn around and stare at your computer screen. 

You hear Frank take a slow deep breath before feeling his hands pull your office chair away from the desk to face him. “What are you doi-FRANK!” You exclaim, as he picks you up out of the chair and slings you over his shoulder easily. You kick your feet, trying to squirm free but his grip is solid. 

Frank wordlessly walks out of your office, into the bedroom, and tosses you onto the bed. 

“Fuckin the attitude out ya” Frank grunts, answering your question as he expertly disrobes the both of you in no time at all. You have a safeword for these kinds of situations, but you don’t want to use it. Instead you pound at his chest and try pushing him away from you, to no avail. Frank grabs both of your wrists and holds them down with one of his massive hands while you try to squirm away from him. He’s too strong for you to break away. Frank looks you in the eye for a couple of seconds, menacingly, you know he is giving you a chance to say your safe word, but you just narrow your eyes at him trying to send as much malice his way as possible. His other hand grabs one of your knees pushing them to the side before he sinks himself into you immediately. Frank lets out a low grunt, eyes all over you while you fight not to close your own from the pleasure. He notices your struggle, but you refuse to give in. 

“You’re real wet f’me already sweetheart”  he growls into your ear, starting to move slowly, teasing you, torturing you.

Frank isn’t shy about being loud. He grunts and growls, moans and sighs. When he starts nibbling at your neck, it all becomes too much and you can’t help but let out a small whine. 

“Atta girl” Frank teases, pounding into you harder and faster, giving you no time to adjust to his new pace. Still holding your hands above your head, he whispers in your ear “Now if I let these go are y’ gonna behave baby?” You can't help but melt at the way he said that. It’s too much, you can’t keep resisting how good this feels, you mewl, nodding your head for him, and he releases your hands which immediately reach for his body, grasping anywhere you can hold him. Still thrusting into you, Frank bends over pressing his lips against yours, thrusting his tongue into your mouth. You greedily suck on his tongue, one hand in his hair scratching his scalp. Frank’s thrusts become irregular, he’s close and so are you. Frank breaks away from the kiss, then taking both of your legs and placing them over his shoulders, you didn’t think it would be possible but he starts pounding into you even faster, setting a punishing pace that makes your legs shake and your eyes roll back. It comes in waves, pleasure overtakes your whole body and Frank cums inside of you shortly after. 

Frank crawls up the bed, pulling you with him to cuddle into his chest, softly saying “I couldn’t handle it if something happened to you.” You wrap your arms around him, pressing your face into his chest, and you squeeze him tight. “I know. I’m sorry. I love you.” 

[littlemisssatanist]

my acotar unpopular opinions

taking this time to come out as an acotar reader. yes i've read all the books and i've spent way too much time thinking about it. i enjoy the books in the sense that i enjoy hating on many of the characters and loving a few of the others.

be forewarned inner circle fans. you will not like this.

rhysand is not a 'morally grey' character. he's a rapist and a groomer. he sexually assaulted feyre utm, he groomed her (reminder that she was 19 in acotar), and he withheld important medical information from her. 'you'll always have a choice' my ass.

nesta telling feyre about her pregnancy was not a bad thing. why do people act like it is? 'oh she did it to hurt feyre' hurt her by doing what? revealing the lies that her beloved husband had woven? revealing the fact that she'd die giving birth? the fact that rhysand told literally everybody but feyre?

mor is not the champion for women everyone thinks she is. this i will give to sjm it is truly impressive to make a character like women and still be a pick me. i'm not even going to go into her whole weird ass relationship with her dad (i still don't understand why she wouldn't just kill him. 'oh rhys needed the army' rhys is supposed to be the most powerful high lord ever. either admit he's a fucking loser or give me an actual good reason for this) or the fact she's seemingly incapable of doing anything to help the women in the court of nightmares, but everytime she was mentioned, i had to let out a heavy sigh and rub my temples.

on a similar topic. i liked eris. like a lot. out of all the acotar characters sjm has written, eris is by far my favorite.

the inner circle needs to sit the fuck down. they are the most hypocritical bitches i've ever met. they like to think themselves high and mighty. reading them make fun of lucien's band of exiles while their name is literally 'court of dreamers' was the most infuriating thing ever. and then they have the gall to be insulted when called out. don't dish what you can't take.

out of all the inner circle, the only one i don't hate is azriel. this is simply because he is the only one who hasn't opened his big fat mouth and done something bad (except if you maybe count his whole thing with elain). cassian is on my hit list. it's on sight with cassian.

nessian is sjm's worst ship and i will stand by that. lucien/nesta could have been so much. 'nesta would have ripped lucien apart' and cassian was your first choice? not even azriel was considered? like be so for real right now. sjm didn't see the potential of lucien/nesta and i will forever mourn that.

sjm is a terrible writer. i'm not saying this to be mean but she seriously just sucks at it. that being said i admire her ability to still make millions of dollars off her shitty writing. as a woman, i am rooting for her. as a reader, every day i wake up a shoot a prayer to the heavens begging the gods to not let sjm write any more books from the inner circle's pov.

lucien/elain is better than azriel/elain. argue with the wall.

eris/azriel is better than azriel/elain. you can kiss my ass.

NESTA/ERIS IS BETTER THAN RHYSAND/FEYRE. i know this because i have been enlightened.

feyre is a victim to rhysand. that being said, she is also a major bitch. both can be true because these things are not mutually exclusive. i wish she could make friends outside of the ic like nesta did, but i know that's unlikely.

feyre's pregnancy storyline was completely useless and went against her whole character.

acomaf retconned everything about tamlin and feyre's relationship in order to make more money. idc.

tamlin gets a ridiculous amount of hate. rhysand is hypocritical. so tamlin locking feyre in a house because she wants to ride out with him into potential danger is terrible and abusive, but rhysand locking nesta in the house of wind for... *checks notes*... having sex and spending money on alcohol is helping her? what?

[midnightsslut]

So was taylor really cancelled in 2016 or was it more that she wasn't as popular as she was/would like to be?

oh she was absolutely canceled. buckle up because I have a lot of thoughts on this djsjsj.

if you were around in the fandom at all, you knew. things were BAD. that level of hate towards a celebrity is honestly rare these days. i would say the only thing that comes close in recent memory is like… idk, it’s actually hard to think of any because it was a combination of a few factors. it’s not that the general public decided to quietly boycott her and stop consuming her music. it’s that there were viral tweets hating on her pretty much every week. if she did anything in 2016-18, it was met with an absolutely asinine amount of criticism. twitter had a field day with things as innocent as her september cover and her post about having a good year in 2017. a lot of celebrities decided to distance themselves and take kanye’s side. there were numerous articles written about how she was finally going down and should apologize for being problematic. people were famously convinced the tour would flop and absolutely celebrated it. people literally told her she was dead. it’s genuinely difficult to explain the scope of this hate train to people who weren’t around at the time, especially because the news cycle is very different now. people get over news stories a lot quicker than they used to.

now, the main argument people use to prove that she wasn’t canceled is the first-week sales of reputation, which is sort of funny to me because all the coverage in 2017 focused on how its performance was lackluster compared to 1989. of course it still sold well compared to other artists’ albums in the first week, because there was still hype around her comeback, and most importantly, she has a huge fan base. none of the singles had longevity except delicate, which fans genuinely worked their asses off to campaign for. the radio did not play her singles like it used to, though this is due to other factors as well. sure, rep was not actually a flop, but it was nowhere near how TS6, the follow-up to one of the biggest pop eras of the decade, could’ve performed without the cancellation. it also got the worst reviews of her career, most of which generally didn’t focus on the music or the lyricism and were just mad at her as a person. yes, this sounds dramatic, considering the fact that it still got a lot of glowing reviews. the media made sure to focus on a lot of the negative stuff, although they were surprised that critics generally seemed to like it.

what’s funny is that, when she spoke about the kanye controversy in interviews in 2019, no one told her she wasn’t ‘really’ canceled, because a lot of people still hated her. they just told her to get over it. the level of hate was nowhere near pre-rep tour levels anymore, but she was still one of the most criticized celebrities, and it was widely believed that her peak had passed (people love to write revisionist history about the lover album and its performance that does not actually reflect the numbers, but that’s another story). now that more time has passed, and she’s even higher than she was pre-2016, people want to convince her that she’s actually wrong.

it’s almost insane to me to chalk up that level of hate to anything other than a cancellation. seeing articles like ‘was taylor swift REALLY canceled?’ and essays on why that’s just in her head will infuriate ANYONE who was online and didn’t hate her. none of the articles I linked here really convey the scope of that hate. taylor really played the long game and came out the other side of it, but she WAS canceled.

[cutecatlov3r]

"𝐢 𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮."

kenma kozume x reader (fem)

some drabbles on your rivals to lovers relationship with kenma !

words: 1.4k

warnings/tw: all characters are 18+, college AU(?), mean! kenma, enemies to lovers, and some suggestive themes.

a/n: I just needed to write about kenma being mean to you and you being mean back, if you want I can make a smut version as well... heavily inspired by the Netflix series "The Beef", made me cry sm . like, comment, re-blog ily ! don't copy my work . not proofread .

★ As soon as he met you he despised you . He couldn't stand the sound of your annoying ass voice, all he wanted was to sit in peace . Usually he doesn't mind being around loud people but you... You pissed him off for some reason, he never wanted to be around you.

"I don't think Kenma likes me..." you whispered in Kuroo's ear. You started to sense Kenma rolling his eyes at you and scoffing every time you spoke. He annoyed you, if he had something to say, you wanted him to say it to your face .

It was so obvious you were talking about Kenma, he sat in front of you and Kuroo. You talked so loud, you couldn't even whisper silently, it irked Kenma even more.

"You're fine Y/n, everyone loves you," Kuroo reassured, patting your back, gently.

Kenma furrowed his eyebrows as he played his game. Yeah right, he can't even stand you. He would never be able to like someone so childish and annoying...

★ He hates the fact that all of his friends adored you. He knows damn well they only like you because you are somewhat attractive. He knows what you are thinking when you show up to their practices in skirts and tank tops, he knows that you're just there because you're a slut .

"Stop distracting our team, just get out of here... We don't want you here anyway," Kenma mumbled, sweat dripping from his forehead.

To be fair, you were kind of distracting Kuroo and Lev by talking to them whenever they got the chance to speak with you. But still! It infuriated you that Kenma worded it like that, it was rude!

"No need to be rude Kenma, I'm here to support my friends," you retorted, crossing your arms. you've about had it with him, you know he doesn't like you. And it pisses you off because you did nothing!

★ Kenma loathed the way his friends talk about you any chance they get. You are a cute girl, those boys just can't help themselves. Still, it makes Kenma frustrated.

"Y/n is so sweet, she made me some brownies today," Kuroo swooned. Kuroo had a little thing for you, you weren't aware of this but all of the boys knew.

"Oh yeah? Well she's planning to wear my jersey the next time we have a game," Yaku teased.

"She said she'll be cheering for me at the next game too. Only me," Lev added, punching Kuroo's shoulder playfully.

Kuroo started to visibly sulk.

"...I hate you guys... She won't be doing any of that, she's going to-"

"Can you guys please shut up? I'm tired of hearing about Y/n, that's all you guys ever talk about. It's annoying," Kenma said, his eyes glued to his phone.

★ Finally, you confronted him at a party in front of everyone. After that day, the two of you HATED each other, or so you thought. You could never see yourself being friends with him, ever.

"What the hell is your problem?! You spilled that drink on me on purpose!" you yelled, very angry at the situation. You were embarrassed, everyone saw, it made you feel like crying. You had issues when it came to having everyone pay attention to you. You only liked being around your group of friends, not the whole damn party.

Kenma did spill his drink on you but it wasn't on purpose, it was a simple accident. He bumped into you as you were dancing with Kuroo and Bokuto, causing his cup to spill on your clothes. Still, he found it amusing when he saw you get angry at the situation, so he did not apologize or even acknowledge you until you called him out.

"I didn't do it on purpose so..."

"Yes you did!" you exclaimed, Kuroo held on to your shoulder, trying to calm you down.

"Let's calm down y/n," Kuroo tried to say.

"Stop trying to defend her idiotic ways. She can handle things herself, she's not a damn baby," Kenma commented, feeling more aggravated

Kenma pinched his eyebrows together.

"What did I ever do to you?! Seriously! You're always so mean for no reason! I knew you didn't like me but holy fuck, spilling a drink on me is a bit much!"

"So bothersome... I'm going to tell you this once. I. Did. Not. You fucking idi-"

Slap!

★ After the whole slap situation Kenma saw you in a different light kind of... He still hated your guts but he did notice how strong and confident you were. He couldn't help but admire some of the good aspects of you. So instead of dreading you, he openly speaks to you, only making rude comments of course. And you did not hold back either.

"What should I wear to Akaashi's party?" you asked, showing off a few outfits to Kuroo and Bokuto. The men sat on the floor, they loved listening to your rants and their favorite thing to do is tell you what to wear.

"The black skirt is cute," Bokuto said, pointing at the skirt in your left hand.

"No way! I like the dress, it always shows off your natural curves," Kuroo added, giving you a sly wink.

You giggled at their suggestions, Kuroo and Bokuto were your favorite friends.

Kenma groaned, bored of the conversation, he was dragged there because he is Kuroo's best friend so he was forced to go wherever he went.

"Do you have an issue?" you asked, sassily, placing your hands on your hips.

"Your voice is so damn annoying,"

You pretended to gasp, gripping your chest. "How mean Kenma!... Is what I would say if I cared. I didn't even want you here so please refrain from making any unnecessary comments,"

Kenma rolled his eyes at your bratty attitude.

★ You two banter all the time, some would consider it flirting but you never saw it in that way. Mutual disrespect for each other... Yeah, only mutual disrespect.

You whined, begging Kuroo not to leave you with Kenma. He was on his way to class, if he went to class, you'd be left with Kenma.

"Please Tetsuro!" you begged, giving him the best puppy eyes you could. "Stay! Skip class! Please!!"

Kuroo smiled, he loved seeing your bratty side, it excited him. "You know I can't n/n, just stay with Kenma, I'll be done in an hour,"

You groaned. Kenma cocked his eyebrow at you.

"Trust me, I'm not happy either," he mumbled, his hands shoved deep into his sweatshirt pockets.

"Oh of course you are Kenma! I know you're in love with me, you love being around me!" you cheered, sarcastically.

Kenma visibly gagged, causing Kuroo to laugh.

★ Eventually though... The two of you were forced to be around each other more, creating an unusual bond. You both don't directly hate each other, you just don't have a super stable friendship. But! You guys can be with each other without having the mean tension.

"Sup bitch, have you seen Kuroo?" you asked, placing your legs on Kenma's lap.

He shoved them off him instantly.

"Disgusting. And I don't know where he is, I think he went to grab some snacks for movie night,"

You hummed to yourself. A happy tune was in your mind and you couldn't help but hum.

"Can you hum quieter? Holy shit, so annoying," Kenma said, pulling his own hair. Obviously he was joking.

And with him saying that, you hummed as loud as you could.

★ Uh oh... Why did he have to walk in on you changing your clothes... That just made some things weird between you two...

"Idiot, where are you-"

Your face burned with embarrassment, you were in the middle of removing your shirt in your room. Why the hell did he have to come in right now?!

The two of you just stared at each other... In complete silence, unsure how to break the awkward tension.

Luckily, Kenma slammed the door shut.

"What the fuck," he thought, taking a deep breath. "No fucking way..." he continued thinking, looking down at his pants.

Kuroo ran to the scene, worried about the door being slammed.

"What's up with you? Oh shit man you have a boner," Kuroo commented, pointing at his pants.

"No shit!"

You heard the whole conversation, shaking your head, wishing you didn't hear anything.

★ After that the two of you just teased each other, meanly, sometimes being harsh. And actually started building a friendship, not a friendly one though.

"Slut,"

"Pervert,"

"You wanted me to walk in on you," Kenma yawned, placing his hands behind his head.

The two of you were currently walking through the hallways, planning to meet up with Kuroo. This was the first time you guys spoke about the situation. It made your cheeks burn thinking about it. But... It made Kenma feel other things.

"Shut up! You probably were spying on me! You wanted to see me like that,"

Kenma shrugged. "I still think you wanted me to walk in on you,". He faked a gasp "Are you in love with me?!"

"You wish," you rolled your eyes.

That's all I have for now... Maybe I'll make a part 2, just wanted to drabble some scenarios :x

[iwriteasfotini]

Where do we draw the villain line?

Something which is so intriguing to me about the Harry Potter fandom is how flexible *most/some/a few* (honestly IDK how many) people are in giving the villains of the story their own story. Personally I LOVE THIS. Because the best villains are the ones who aren't simply macho bad guys (or gals) who are bad because the author said so. The best villains are the ones you are almost rooting for. The ones you begin to think... wait maybe that person isn't so bad. Or the ones who earn some empathy. And then go and be total arse holes anyways. Because a good story needs a villain, it's simply a fact.

If there was ever a time to remember humans are each living our own story, it is now. It doesn't excuse ANYTHING. It is infuriating and sad. But it is reality. Someone's villain is someone else's hero. And vice versa. But let's not get off on a tangent.

Now the curious thing is while certain HP characters are given some grace where their evil deeds are concerned, others are not. Like at all. Have any of you read Crimson Rivers? Of course you have! If you want to shift your mindset on how you view most of the Death Eaters, read that fic. But in it, I do not remember Mulciber or Avery being mentioned in any sort of good light. Walburga... her terrible parenting is quite undisputed. Umbridge! Barty Crouch Senior! I think Vernon Dursley falls into this category. There are still characters who are seen as simply evil for the sake of evil.

So how did Tom, Bella, Barty, Draco (but I mean, Draco is really a terrible villain to begin with) and a few others end up with backstory, humanity, and quite a few people invested in them. I don't have the answer, but it is an interesting phenomena. Because I am quite new to the fandom and it took all of three tumblr posts to get me fully on board with Rosekiller. Bella, I don't like her, but she is a fascinating character to write for. And she has redeemable qualities. Tom is a cold hearted killer who might have turned out completely different if he didn't have the childhood trauma he did. I imagine Tom's orphanage life was about as void of love and affection as it is possible to be. Sure his basic survival needs were taken care of, but he wasn't loved. And that was his life from birth.

Perhaps it is the fact there is just enough humanity given to these characters in canon that in fandom we take that nugget of humanity and turn it into a full fledged backstory. Barty is a great example. He is screaming at his father during his trial and his father flat up ignores him, all while his mother is weeping in the background. His mother sacrifices herself for him, then DIES two days later (clearly she wasn't in good health to begin with... hmmmmm...). Does Barty even have a Dark Mark? WE DON'T KNOW. Does Barty feel like he has a personal connection with Voldemort, yes, their fathers were both pieces of shite. How did Barty learn this about Tom? It means Tom went out of his way to connect with Barty on a PERSONAL level at some point. Why would he bother, he so rarely give away personal information? Also I feel Barty has a relationship with Winky which is reminiscent of Regulus and Kreacher. Basically there is mutual love and respect on some level (while some wizards see house-elves as servants only).

The fact we can ask all these questions about someone who essentially guided Harry to his should have been death and then was kissed by a dementor (which Dumbledore was LIVID about BTW) makes him such great fodder for the fandom to sculpt a intriguing if not rich back story. It's why I was able to get on board with the Barty isn't a pure villain idea so fast. And I think it really enhances the fandom.

On a side note, Peter's an interesting one as I feel like he is often either forgotten about or lumped into the evil for evil's sake category. Peter made appalling choices, but I think he has a backstory, just like everyone, which can at least account for some of why he did what he did. And it does not have to do with him being bullied, pushed around, or constantly berated by his supposed friends. The Marauders loved each other, and Peter was included in that love.

That being said, there are plenty of people who disagree. Who like to see the Death Eaters as evil. Who cannot fathom how anyone in their right mind can ship Jegulus or be invested in a villain. But to those people I say, Regulus committed suicide as part of taking down Voldemort, Remus put peoples lives at risk every time he left the shack while he was at Hogwarts, Sirius has made some very questionable choices, Harry uses Sectumsempra on Draco, Severus was a Death Eater who changed allegiance, Ron deserts his friends/Harry when they need him, even Fred and George test products on first years and give Hermione a black eye. The lines between good and bad (which are at least somewhat defined in canon) become far less clear in fandom. As Sirius says, the world isn't split between good people and Death Eaters.

If you have read this far into my rant, kuddos to you. If you enjoy thinking and talking about backstory of HP villains, maybe we can connect in some capacity and exchange HC's and thoughts. I also hope you will check out my very epic series which has started posting on Ao3 because I am striving to tell a lot of people's stories in a fast paced, entertaining way.

Thank you for your time and attention. This concludes my rant.

[suckerforcate]

Misjudgement

Pairing: Liandrin Sedai x fem!Reader

Word Count: 4496

Warning: some angst, fighting and blood, death and injuries

Summary: Laindrin and You are on a mission with some sisters and meet white cloaks. Liandrin gets hurt and you go rogue. Why, though? The two of you never seem to get along.

A/n: Request by @midnight-lestrange

Alright, this took me long enough but it's finished at last. Hope you like it!!! Could write a part two if anyone's interested in that. Would love a comment, like or repost!!!

■----------------------------------------■

Walking through the corridor, you didn't really pay attention to your sisters around you or novices that bowed to you. You were tired, and it had been a long day, so you were eager to get to bed. But you should have considered that Liandrin would never let you get away with the events of the day.

You heard footsteps coming towards you and halt in front of you. It was Liandrin, and she had a smug smile on her face. You rolled your eyes, completely aware of what was about to happen.

"I see you're back from the mission, sister. I'm surprised you all came back." Your eyes darted up, and you looked at her surprised. Raising an eyebrow you set to answer.

"I'm not sure I know what you mean, Liandrin." She chuckled and stepped a little closer. The chuckle was bitter, a little arrogant even. "We did our job and gentled the man. Just like we were supposed to."

"You did, after all nearly dying. You underestimated his power and he overwhelmed you. You are too soft with the men." She said, voice icy and head held high, proud. Completely convinced that her way was the only right way.

"I don't share your deep hatred for men, Sister." I calmly responded. "I believe we are mainly there to save them from their own power, it is not their fault they can channel."

"But it's their fault, that they misuse it and besmirch it." She spit the word out, you didn't fully know but were sure she had had bad experiences with men in her life. In a way you couldn't even be mad at her for her attitude.

But it was a fact, the two of you had joined the Red Ajah for utterly different reasons. And hers was much more common with your red sisters. They were filled with hatred towards men and all they wanted was to get rid of them, if they had it their way they'd simply kill them all. You on the other hand had seen a man in your family, someone you loved dearly fall into madness because of the ability to channel. He had distanced himself from everyone, afraid to kill the ones he loved. And you hadn't been able to help. So you had joined the Red Ajah to help men like him. To gentle them before they fell into madness, before it ate them up alive. Though the men weren't always as thankful as you would have liked them to be, you believed in what you did.

"Some men do that, yes. Not all." You stayed calm, you always did. A trait many sisters admired in you, when talking to Liandrin. "Still I don't believe it is right to kill them, as you no doubt would have suggested." You looked at her expectantly. But she simply scoffed and rushed past you. A soft smile formed on your lips as you looked at her over your shoulder and stood in the corridor for a moment. She was a curious woman, hard to read, hard to understand. You chuckled to yourself and set off for your room again.

A good nights sleep would patch you up just fine and tomorrow you would go to the sitter of the red Ajah and report about the mission. So you did just that, but instead of simply reporting back to the sitter, you were sent on a new mission.

"Please, sister. I've just come back yesterday. Sent someone else, I have tasks in the tower." you pleaded, but the red sitter simply shook her head softly. It was infuriating. Not that she sent you, but that she sent Liandrin as well. Everyone knew that the two of you couldn't stay close to each other without fighting.

"You are one of the best Aes Sedai of our Ajah, Sister. We have reports from the East of a group of men, all channelling. It is necessary to sent multiple sisters, multiple powerful sisters." She remained calm, and you saw the reason behind her words. She was right of course.

"I know, and I understand that. But Liandrin? Please!" Your voice took on a pleading tone. This was going to be a disaster. Your sister straightened up and her features lost a little of its patience.

"Enough. You'll both go and that's it. We need you on this mission, both." Her voice left no room for arguments. For her the conversation was over. You raised an eyebrow, curtly nodded and left the room. A few steps down the corridor you leaned against the wall and took a deep breath in. This was going to be an absolute catastrophe.

Your eyes were closed, and you just opened them as footsteps came closer. You looked down the corridor and saw Liandrin proudly walking to the sitters room. You chuckled softly. She looked arrogant, proud because she no doubt knew she was going on a mission. But she looked beautiful. You felt the desire to make her laugh, guessing that just that would probably make the whole tower shine brighter. Make your world a little brighter.

"Something the matter?" She snapped as she noticed your dreamy stare directed onto her. She really had to ruin every nice moment, didn't she? You sighed and pushed yourself off the wall. Liandrin had stopped just in front of the door, just short of entering.

Just two days later you stood in the stables, things packed, horse saddled and all sisters ready. The only one missing was Liandrin. You looked around, at the other two sisters, raising an eyebrow quizzically. They simply shrugged and shook their head.

"Don't be too happy, we're together on this mission." You calmly said and didn't even wait to see her reaction. You could easily predict it. And if you had looked you would have seen that your prediction had been absolutely accurate. She looked surprised, then outraged and huffed, annoyed that you just left. But, for just a tiny moment, there was a slight smile on her lips. Though she wiped that off immediately and opened the door. You were already gone.

Annoyed you tied the reins of your horse to the stable door and stomped out of the wooden shed. It had been agreed that you would meet in the stables at this exact time. Where the hell was she? You made your way through the tower quickly and up to her room. The knock was unusually hard for you and was immediately answered by Liandrin.

She was casually clothed, had her hair in a few braids and looked at you innocently. You felt like you were about to explode.

"Why in the lights name aren't you down with the others?" You hissed, and she smirked slightly before she turned around and walked back into her room. The door standing open, an invitation for you to come in.

"I'm not coming." Her tone was flat, calm and yet you heard a little bit of satisfaction in it. You took a deep breath to calm down and not immediately slap the smirk off of her face.

"What do you mean?" She chuckled and looked back at you. Her arms were crossed, and her face conveyed pure arrogance.

"I'm not coming. I will most certainly not go on this mission with you. You are incompetent and will probably endanger us all." You sighed angrily. Rushing past her, you grabbed her backpack and opened it.

"You will come. Not coming endangers us. You are powerful and we need that. As much as I'd like for you to stay away. So grow up and get over your stupid grudge." You spoke heatedly, while you ran through her room, randomly opening drawers and pulling out clothes that looked practical and useful. Liandrin's eyes were widened and followed you through the room. She was surprised by your boldness. Surprised by your bluntness and honesty.

It would take you some time to get to the men that had been reported on. It was at least a seven days ride, without complications. But there were always complications. Always. Not once in all your time as an Aes Sedai had you just been able to ride somewhere, do your job and go back.

"Here." You said as you pushed the packed backpack into her arms and sharply turned around to go back to the stables. Liandrin looked down at the backpack and back at the spot where you were no longer standing. She rolled her eyes but chuckled softly. Quickly she followed you, luckily another sister had already saddled her horse. You were ready to leave.

Sometimes the complications were minor and sometimes, like today, they were a massive fucking problem. Admittedly you were easy to identify as Aes Sedai. Even if you had taken off your rings. Four women, all clothed in red, obviously wealthy. What else would you be?

In certain situations it's good to be recognised as Aes Sedai immediately. It helped to be respected. It certainly wasn't convenient when multiple white cloaks were crossing your path.

It was no secret that Liandrin and you were by far the most powerful, not just of your group, but of all the Reds. So, instinctively the two of you stepped in front of the other, trying to slightly shield them with your horses. A laugh, cold and piercing, empty of any actually humour rang out between the trees.

"Do you really think you can protect your Sisters?" The voice said with cold amusement. A man stepped out of the group, his eyes made you shiver. With a look of pure hatred towards you. A chain dangled from his belt, you could see at least eight serpent rings, in all colours. Mainly blues, but some yellows, a green and a red one were there as well. Trying to remain calm you shot Liandrin a look, seeing the same kinds of emotions in her eyes. Slight panic, that was slowly turning into massive panic. Though she was much better at hiding it than you. She lifted her chin again, preserving the look of arrogance and confidence. It looked extremely believable.

"Don't make a mistake that might cost you your life." Liandrin spoke, sharp and icy as usual. The white cloaks just seemed to see that as a challenge they were willing to take.

"The two at the front are obviously the strongest, tame them. But keep them alive for now. Kill the others." The white cloak sharply ordered the other men and turned around to go back to his horse. Before you could even move they were between your horses. Your two sisters had lost they're hands before they could start channelling. They're screams shattered your soul, and you acted fast, throwing one of the men against the nearest tree, golden weaves glowing around him. In mere second you were off your horse and slowly approached the man, still floating in the air.

"You bastard." You spit out and pulled the weaves a little tighter around his chest and throat, strangling him. Though you let him abruptly fall to the ground as you heard a scream. A very familiar scream. You shot around, your two sisters were dead on the ground, hands cut off but rings already removed. Frantically your eyes searched through the trees and blood for Liandrin.

A glimpse of honey blonde hair caught your attention. Another scream. You started running towards her and saw her kneeling on the forest ground, clothes dirty and ripped slightly. She had a stab wound just below the rips and a sharp cut on her cheek. In a swift motion you threw the man standing next to her through the forest and heard him hit a tree somewhere. You didn't care, you didn't even look after him. You felt someone kick his knee into your back and your knees gave out, you fell to the ground as well. Your hands were being tied behind your back, and you couldn't even concentrate on the one power enough to use it as you saw the white cloak with the rings on his belt harshly grab Liandrin's face and force her to look at him.

"Try to channel, and I'll cut your hands off." He nearly spit into her face and Liandrin tried to get herself out of his grip. He pulled a dagger out of his belt and held it to her throat, pushing it into the flesh slightly.

"You dirty women, think the power is just for you. You think you're so much better than the rest of us." You just knew Liandrin would say something stupid.

"We are." She pressed out. The man immediately pushed the dagger into her flesh more, drawing a little bit of blood.

"Leave her alone." You shouted, you were aware that it sounded more desperate and panicked than strong and demanding. But you didn't care. The man slowly turned to look at you, his dirty fingers were still on Liandrin's face. You tried to loosen the rope around your hands and channel, but you felt a sudden kick into your stomach that took your breath away for a moment. You could have sworn Liandrin had a hint of panic in her eyes at that.

"Leave her, please." This time it just sounded pathetic. Nothing more. It had no edge, no sharpness or demanding tone. It was strangled and desperate. The man chuckled slightly.

"No, I won't." He said and took one of Liandrin's hands, his dirty fingers caressing her knuckles for a moment. As she wanted to pull her hand away he grabbed her wrist so hard, a whine escaped her. He turned around to one of the other men who had cut of the hands of your other sisters.

You were still breathless and desperate, but you felt anger and immediate panic inside of you. You didn't even have to concentrate on the one power, it was like it just flowed out of you. Like the anger and the panic enabled it and took over control for you. You didn't even take notice of it until the power flowed out of you, lighting up the forest and sending shock waves through the ground. You pull your hands apart and rip the rope that had tied them together. The wrists hurt, like the rope had sharply cut into the flesh. But you don't even feel the pain, you simply pull your hands to the front and concentrate on the men.

"I said, leave her." You pressed out, a little stronger this time. Sharper and icy. A tone of voice you had learned solely from Liandrin. On weak knees you stood up, all the men around you too dumbfounded to act. You stepped between the man and Liandrin and threw the men that were left on their feet through the forest. Almost immediately you felt all the strength leave you, and you collapsed, falling to your knees. Liandrin's touch on your arm was softer than anything you thought she was able to muster.

"We have to leave." She said, her voice weakly in your ear, like it was coming from behind a door about a mile away. Adrenaline was the only thing leading your body right now. Shakily you stood up, and somehow you managed to get onto a horse, sitting in front of Liandrin, her arm wrapped around your middle, the reins in one hand. Suddenly a sharp wind hit your face and the world seemed to rush past you. Like a faint memory in the back of your mind you thought about your two sisters. The ones you were leaving behind. But you weren't strong enough to even say something. It felt like you were riding for hours, though you weren't sure how accurate your sense of time was right now.

At some point Liandrin stopped and let go of you, you weren't as weak anymore. Apart from the weakness of using so much of the power you hadn't really been that hurt. A few scratches and some nasty bruises from the kicks. Nothing more. You heard a sharp intake of breath behind you and slightly turned around.

Liandrin had her hand pressed against her side, the robe she was wearing was soaked in blood, and it seeped through her fingers. She looked unbelievably pale.

"Liandrin." You said shocked and immediately got off of the horse. You helped her off the horses as well and let her down on the ground gently. You took her hand away from the wound and opened her robe to push it to the side, carefully shoving her shirt up to reveal her waist and the wound.

"In light's name." You cursed and tried to concentrate on channelling. You were much stronger than before, but still weak and worn out. It felt like the power wouldn't really form to anything proper, you felt like a novice again. Tears sprung to your eyes.

You shook your hands, like that would help. You felt your chest tighten again, the inevitable feeling of panic rising again. She was bleeding, too much. She would bleed out.

"Shit, fuck." You cursed, voice a little shaky. Your palms were sweaty, and you rubbed them dry on your trousers, shaking them again in a feeble attempt to get them to fucking work. Liandrin looked up at you and seemed...confused?

"It's ok." She said weakly. You shook your head violently, pressing the palm of your hand against your chest, trying to calm your laboured breaths.

"It's not. I can't heal you, I'm too weak." You felt her other hand reach out for your hand and squeeze it. It was a very weak squeeze. Too weak.

"Look at me, and concentrate. You're strong." She whispered. You nearly wanted to chuckle. Was this what it took to get Liandrin Sedai to compliment you?

You took a deep breath in and calmed yourself as much as possible. Your hands were shaky as you lifted them again, letting them hover above her wound. You looked into her eyes and took all the strength left in you together and tried to channel. It felt like you were burning out from the inside but the weaves appeared. You were aware of how dangerous it was, but that didn't matter. Slowly, very slowly, the weaves healed her wound. Your breathing heavily, hand shaking more and more. She gained a little of her natural skin colour back, and the second her wound was closed you broke down. The wound wasn't healed very prettily, there would definitely be a scar. Usually you were much better at this, but she was safe. That was all that mattered.

All you felt were soft fingers pushing your hair out of your face and lifting your head. As you opened your eyes you realised, that your head was resting in Liandrin's lap. Her fingers softly combed through your hair, soothingly, nearly lovingly. A touch you weren't aware Liandrin was capable of.

It felt like an eternity that you both stayed like this, her fingers running through your hair. You weren't sure if you had maybe fallen asleep at some point. But you were definitely a little stronger again when she suddenly spoke.

"You risked your life for me." She said, and it sounded like she was confused. It was just a hint in her voice, put you picked up on it. Apart from the fact that you'd risk your life for all of your sisters, you were slightly surprised that she ever thought you wouldn't.

"You should have gotten out of there and not cared about me. You should have saved your own life." She added, sounding almost angry now. She didn't look at you, looked straight ahead into the forest, and yet her fingers were still in your hair. Slowly you sat up and tilted your head as you looked at Liandrin.

"Of course I risked my life for you. I'd do that for all of our sisters." You said simply. You weren't going to tell her that she was special. She turned her face to look at you. She searched for your eyes, for any sort of lie in them, any sort of deception.

"You hate me." She stated coldly, putting on the arrogant and confident mask again. You immediately let out a weak chuckle.

"I don't hate you." She was confused. That was very apparent now.

"Everyone knows that you hate me. You didn't even want me on this mission." She said and raised an eyebrow, it was like she wanted to challenge you.

"I'm the only one in the whole tower who can actually keep calm when talking to you. If I hated you, I definitely wouldn't keep so calm." You explained carefully and shrugged. You weren't sure if she was ready for the whole conversation, for the blunt and full revelation yet.

"But-..." you cut her off. She looks surprised, not many people dared to do that.

"Think about it, when we interact, who's angry and spits venom? Not me." You couldn't help but smirk slightly. She looked stunned, almost speechless. That was a first, you thought.

"What the hell are you talking about?" And she was back. In full glory, icy and mean. You sighed slightly and looked away for a moment. You thought about what to say, how to make her understand.

"Liandrin, I care for you. And I was scared..." you gulped slightly, feeling your chest tighten at the memory of her, so helpless and endangered, "I was really scared for you." You added a little softer and looked back at her.

"Bullshit." She spit out and jumped to her feet. Taking a few steps away from you, she looked down at you, angry and yet a little scared. You were still a little wobbly on your feet but tried to stand up nonetheless. It took a moment to steady yourself once you were up, but you managed. Carefully you took a step closer to her, but she immediately backed off. You sighed.

"Liandrin, please." You pleaded but she ignored it. "No one cares about me, the whole tower hates me. They fear me." She was vulnerable right now, you knew that. But as usual she hid it with anger. You were lost for what to do. It was clear she didn't believe your words. It was clear she didn't want you to get closer. There wasn't much you could do.

"I don't." You said softly, not moving any closer to not upset her further. "I don't fear you. And I do care about you. I always have." You added carefully, choosing your words cautiously. It's like you could see the gears work in her mind, and as she looked back at you, she looked nothing like the Liandrin you knew from the Tower. She looked nothing like the Liandrin that was always angry, always held her chin up high and strode through the corridors of the Tower as if she was the Amyrlin Seat herself.

She looked like a little kid, who had never been loved, never been cared for. Like a woman that was used to being mistreated and used for someone else's pleasure and will. It broke your heart. Carefully you stepped closer again, and this time she allowed it. She looked so small, so vulnerable. With a few steps you stood right in front of her.

"Lia, I care for you. And you deserve to be cared for." You softly whispered, like it was a secret — no, an oath. An oath to always care for her. To give her the love and care she had never gotten in her life. "You deserve to be loved." You added carefully, hoping she would get the hint. And judging by her reaction, she did. Her eyes widened a bit, and she stared at you completely stunned. If not for the situation, and the obvious pain in her eyes, it would have been adorable. You couldn't help but smile slightly and shrug, as if to underline what you had just said.

"You can't-..." She said, voice just a little thinner than usual, a little shakier.

"Yes, I can." You said simply and carefully reached out for her hand. Her fingers against the palm of your hand, soft and warm, was like a grounding power. It calmed your heart, silenced your self-doubt and anxiety.

"And I do." You whispered, face close to hers, so close that you can nearly feel her shaky breath in your skin. You squeeze her hand slightly.

"You're a pain in the ass most of the time." You say and a ghost of a smirk is on her lips. That alone tells you she feels the same or at least similarly to you. Otherwise, you'd be long dead by now, talking to her like this.

"But I care about you, and you're much more than you show people or even make yourself out to be." You finish and search her eyes with yours, trying to decipher a reaction, her feelings on this. You can't read her, and for a moment you ask yourself why. You can always read her. But then you understand why. Her eyes are glossy, she'd never allow even one tear to fall, you know that. But they're there, and that's honestly enough answer for you.

Boldly you tug a strand of honey hair behind her ear, that had fallen out of her complicated half-updo of braids. You'll never understand how she has the patience to do those every day. Your fingers linger in her sharp jawbone for a moment.

"You're ridiculous." She says, and it lacks an obvious amount of sharpness, though you can hear she tries to muster it. She just fails. You smile gently at that.

"Probably." She looks a bit annoyed by that answer, but can't hide a soft smile of her own. A crack of wood somewhere behind you snaps you out of it. You spin around, ready to fight again even though your legs are still a bit wobbly. It's just your horse, you audibly sigh in relief.

"We have to get back to the Tower. I don't know how far you rode, I was completely out of it. But I imagine the white cloaks are pissed, and they're still far too close." You say diplomatically as you look back at her. In the few moments you turned away she sucked up the tears rimmed in her eyes and patched her mask back together. Though it's a bit more transparent than before. A good sign. She agrees and you both get back on the horse. It's a bit awkward now, close together on the horse. Back to the Tower will surely take two days. Maybe longer. You'll manage, and you're sure once at the Tower she'll try to shut you out. But you can be persuasive if you want and now that you've seen a glimpse of her, you won't back down.