#and wouldn't that be weird for him in this hypothetical?

[jichanxo]

self portraits/personal exploration/self insert art

[patchwork-crow-writes]

80 - The Final Cut

...so, you have made your choice.

Do you remember what I once said, my light? That the bonds you break may make you stronger? And oh, what a brilliant fire you've made from those bridges, as rudely incandescent as the sun itself.

...I can hardly stand to look at it, it stings my eyes so...

For the final time then, let me roll out the red carpet and bid you welcome to my kingdom. No subjects shall resist your entry, as there are none to defend this place... I have to wonder if you planned it that way, but I'm not certain you were even thinking that far ahead. They would not be able to stop you in any case.

I see the twisted sword in your hand, o Lightbringer, its tortured edges baying for something to sunder... but there'll be no satisfaction for you here. Even if I wanted to FIGHT, even if I were capable of standing against you as an equal... that would just be playing into your twisted game, where statistical superiority is all. And it is not a game I have any interest in playing.

So then... will you proceed? Will you reap the bitter harvest of your conquest of this world, and run your sword through my unguarded heart? Will you then march on to plant your flag in the ruins of your hubris...?

...but what am I saying? You've come this far, why stop at the final bump in the road? After all, you and I both know this isn't real, and that none of this even matters... if it ever even did to you in the first place.

And then I suppose you'll go back, wont you? Back to before you broke it all over your knee, just to see if you could. Because you can. And if you can, then why not? Such is the luxury your godhood affords you.

Then all that is left to say is: thank you for playing our game, Lightbringer. I hope that you had fun.

______________________________

The Dark Menagerie No. 80

<-<-First || <-Prev || Next-> || Index

[yuriyuruandyuraart]

Opinions on Dream? :^

SO many feelings about him omgg rant under cut please forgive me

okay so i don't really talk or draw him much cause honestly,,,most of the times i just think he's a bit....boring? or more accurately plain? not in a mean way either but just in a 'fades into the background' type of way like don't get me wrong!! he's a really nice friend to his peers, his feelings about his powers and aura making his relationships harder to navigate and trust along with his whole conflict with nightmare and morality about what's good and bad IS very cool!! and i love it whenever they write him to be complex and not on this black and white mentality or when he's just straight up following along his friends with no free will or with a dubious purpose without ever addressing his issues or feelings! it's just unsatisfying to me :')

or when they're making him the 'naive' and oblivious, (sometimes childish?) character being marked as the obstacle and villain along with the other star sanses from the fic's pov, always talking about doing good things while fighting his brother and not hearing him out about the balance, (and for weak reasons most of the time. like it's been so long and you STILL haven't sat down with him when he's, generally, basically begged you to just have a talk? guys please :'( ) or when they go for the victim sad dream always missing the old nightmare, where corrupted nightmare is the incarnation of evil, with no sympathy or emotion except anger and sadistic glee, killing and hurting everyone and dream's just trying to protect the multiverse and dream's always been in the right. such extremes!!!

LIKE!! i hope i'm not the only one that thinks a 500+ year old should have had enough time to idk. learn things? about people and manipulation and deceit? after knowing what the villagers did to night? about the bad things in the world and how there's a lot of grey areas in life and that he maybe reflected on his past enough to process and ask himself if there should to be a convo to settle his differences with nightmare (and you can make nightmare the stubborn one too! or have them BOTH be petty and imperfect and have some things wrong and some right at the same time like why do i always see the good guy vs bad guy cliché with these two when they're the perfect example of why positivity doesn't have meaning without the negativity!! as long as there's a satisfying evolution or growth that doesn't leave me empty i'm good yknow?)

plus i believe dream really isn't as dumb as people view him. i do get some of you saying he probably can't read or write since that's actually a pretty interesting idea to explore! but in general please let him have emotions other than pure sunshiny happiness or endless sadness like he's gotta have more depth than that! let him make mistakes, have flaws that don't just make him the bad guy that's always in the wrong by default, and be angry or suspicious or jealous or bitter or battling his mental health problems/depression or malicious or smart or witty or mischievous and silly or sarcastic or ANYTHING dude i just want him to be put into different scenarios where he can be serious or lighthearted like it doesn't even have to be long or perfect but make him feel real.

it could definitely be that i don't read or see much art about dream or really look for it hard enough but also i just. i feel bad for even saying this fr and i wanna be honest about why i don't enjoy most stories about him cause he always gets the worst treatment along with ink!!! especially ink omg the poor guy has it the worst i think like wow do they mess him up :'(

always one dimensional in non shippy fics, or too plain or easily replaceable by other, more entertaining people in the significant other's life in most of his ships like man. i have read fics out there that made me genuinely FEEL and root for him and love his character so much it restored all hope for me!!! but i can only name one on top of my head and the others? it's been so long i don't even remember their names i just legit feel terrible cause i love him still and i can't find many headcanons that fit my interpretation of him yknow?

not to say people who write him very happy, mislead or sad are ruining him like that's silly- if i see something i don't like i just. move on bro i wouldn't force people to feel or think the same way i do about him cause anyone can have whatever headcanons they want!!! just talking about what i personally look for in him and why i can't exactly find it since most of the stuff out there just isn't my cup of tea :')

hopefully i didn't set anyone off with this rambling opinionated essay i just pulled hhh xD i know i know he's a popular character and i know a lot of people like dream so *sobs* please please recommend me artists and fics about him that you think is good it's been so looong since i've read or seen anything new that makes me attached to this little guy aughg<33333

[devotedlyandrogynousyouth]

I am OBSESSED with mean!Jason Todd. I just imagine him saving you from doing something he thinks is really stupid, like walking alone in Gotham after dark and then just being downright mean about it after he takes you home. Unf. Obsessed.

EJEUGDAKAM FOAMING AT THE MOUTH OVER THIS OMG♥️♥️♥️ tysm for the request!

-----------------------------

Mean! Jason Todd (Part 2)

Sensitive Subjects: Smut, anal (kinda blurring the lines of noncon...?), a probably toxic situationship

Mean! Jason Todd who has some weird situationship with you. After you hooked up the first time, it just kinda kept going. Do you love him? You aren't sure. Does he love you? Probably not, but he gets possessive as hell regardless.

"What was that shit about?" He took you to a bar before coming back to his apartment once before it became a regular occurance. His face was twisted into that usual scowl and broad arms crossed over his chest. But, oh, how that look gave you some butterflies.

"Him?" You glance over at the guy you'd previously been chatting with a few moments ago through the loud, crowded bar. "He's just a friend." Of course you were telling the truth: the sex with Jason was just too good to pass up by sleeping with somebody else or getting into a serious relationship.

"My ass." An immediate scoff was his biggest reaction. And, to be fair, that's probably the least jealous thing you could've gotten out of him: the guy could've ended up beaten to a pulp on the sidewalk if Jason saw fit. "Come on, let's get out of here."

Mean! Jason Todd who didn't know you worked the late shift at said bar and thought you were just blowing him off for some other guy when you said you were busy. So, when he saw you walking home from your shift down the shady alleys of Gotham nearing 2 AM, he was pissed.

A quick, forceful grab is all you could feel as a broad, muscled figure approached from behind. There wasn't much you could even do other than thrash and claw at his biceps. "Quit your fucking squirming!" Wait, Jason?

Your head was barely able to turn and place him into view, but, surprisingly, you weren't being kidnapped and it was just your situationship. "What the hell are you doing?" His grip loosens slightly after a moment, allowing you to push yourself away from his chest and arms and back down to your feet.

"What the hell are you doing? Do you know what could happen walking out here this late?" Jason is practically screaming at this point, the sound reverberating off the brick walls of shady Gotham apartments. "Or are you trying to get yourself kidnapped?"

Mean! Jason Todd who practically drags you back to his apartment after, absolutely seething with anger and... Worry? No. You wouldn't dare call it that. Not yet, anyway... Maybe something closer to a jealousy. Maybe he was just still jealous of some hypothetical guy you didn't even have plans with.

"What the actual hell did you think you were doing? Do you know how unsafe it is to be walking near Crime Alley at night?" The door is immediately slammed behind him when he takes you back to his apartment. "Look, if you're blowing me off for some other guy, that's fine. But if you're seriously dumb enough to think that I would be okay with you out by yourself regardless, you need to think again."

"Jay, I was just coming home from-" You start, putting down your work bag on his crappy coffee table like you usually do.

"No, don't give me that shit. You were coming home from a little boy toy's place, weren't you?" He's already on his way to grab the bottle of whiskey from the cabinet next to his fridge. "Should've known you'd be just as much of a slut as she was. Hell, a dumb one at that."

Mean! Jason Todd who doesn't even feel bad as he sees you get a little misty eyed. Or maybe he does... It ws really hard to tell when you could barely see through the tears welling up in your beautiful eyes.

Mean! Jason Todd who really ends up getting on your nerves after the first half hour of arguing. There was nowhere to back away to when he came up and towered over you in his dingy, quiet apartment. And so, you did what you could.

"Oh yeah? Well maybe if that greedy little cunt of yours wasn't begging for attention-" Jason wasn't even yelling anymore. In fact, he'd resorted to slut shaming you only ten minutes into the fight.

And then, a loud slap. Your hand stung. A lot. So did his face, probably. And before you could even think about how to apologize or get yourself out of the situation, Jason is picking you up, hauling you over his shoulder, and carrying you to his bedroom.

Mean! Jason Todd who absolutely tortures you as soon as you're in his bedroom. Sure, you'd both had some pretty rough sex before, but he's never been quite as unhinged as he is right now.

"Look at this cunt..." A light slap to your bare clit as he kneels between your legs. "So fucking wet... You're already dripping." Jason cant help but let out a light scoff. In all honesty, it was probably closer to a sadistic laugh. "Is this all for me, or is it just some other guy's leftovers?"

Mean! Jason Todd who knows for a fact that you're not a huge fan of anal. So, even if you did sleep with somebody else (which he's starting to realize wasn't the case), then at least that tight little hole would be unused.

You couldn't help but shiver slightly as you felt him rub the cold lube on your tight, unused hole. At least he had the 'kindness' to get you all wet before trying to bully his thick, long cock into you. "Jay, I can't-"

"Really? You 'can't'?" He actually laughs at you this time as he slides his thick, dripping tip between your cheeks. "Maybe you should've thought of that before going to get some other guy's dick wet."

Mean! Jason Todd who decides to make you forget every other guy you could possibly think of by pulling as many orgasms out of you as possible. You literally have to beg him to stop by the end of it. Your clit feels like its on fire and you can barely move your legs, but, God, that was probably the best sex you'd ever have.

Mean! Jason Todd who, despite how upset he wants to be with you, is absolutely smothering you with aftercare. He's always made sure that you're alright after hooking up, but this time was just a little more... Passionate?

Your thighs burned. Your hips burned. Even the core of your abdomen felt like it was on fire. But when that cool, damp cloth made contact with your sticky, sweat-sheened skin, it felt like heaven.

"Quit moving..." He mutters as he gently wipes away both of your sticky arousal from between your thighs. "I have you. You're alright... Just let me clean you up and we can sleep or get food, alright? Whatever you want, sweetheart."

Mean! Jason Todd who, by the end of the night, realizes that you didn't sleep with anybody else and just feels so much more at peace. It doesn't matter that you two are simply hooking up and non-exclusive. It doesn't matter that this all started because one of your friends cheated on him. What mattered was that your pretty little cunt and ass were all his for as long as possible (totally not that you were safe and he didn't have to worry about being replaced).

-----------------------------

Masterlist

[youreverydayfangirl]

BAD BLOOD

pairing: max verstappen x singer reader

summary: the one where a private phone call gets leaked, no one gets the full picture and people are quick to judge

warning: online hate, mentions of cheating

a/n: after two months its finally here for you guys

face claim: sabrina carpenter (just had to because shes gorgeous)

f1 masterlist

main masterilst

series masterlist

yourusername has posted

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, francisca.cgomes and 1, 485, 921 others

yourusername SUPRISE!!! I struggled to keep this secret but now i can announce it. the bad blood mv is out now with some very familiar faces

tagged: oliviarodrigo

alexandrasaintmleux AHHHH MY BEAUTIFUL BEST FRIEND

-> yourusername SAYSS YOUUUU

francisca.cgomes I STILL CANT BELIEVE I WAS IN A MUSIC VIDEO

-> yourusername ANYTHING FOR YOU QUEEN

oliviarodrigo is this what we call a slay?

-> yourusername you know it sweet thing

chappellroan IM OBSESSED WITH YOU

liked by creator

milliebobbibrown ICONIC MV

liked by creator

leahsavajeffries I WAS IN THIS

-> yourusername YEAH YOU WERE

user1 MOST ICONIC MV OF ALL TIME

user2 LADIES AND GENTLEMAN, HER

user3 anyone find it weird that exbsf wasn't in it

-> user4 I WAS THINKING THE SAME THING LIKE WHAT

-> user5 go touch grass people grow and change and no ones seen them together for like months now

y/ngossip

liked by exbsf and 31, 859 others

y/ngossip SPOTTED! yourusername and landonorris in what looks like a very heated public exchange, could this be the end?

user1 tagging them is so messy 😭

-> user2 RIGHT

user3 NOT MY PARENTS

user4 whatever happened IK its y/ns fault

user5 not exbsf liking this 👀

-> user6 RIGHT

user7 idk what anyone says exbsf liking this speaks SIDES

-> user8 right cause she wouldn't like it if y/n hadn't done anything wrong

-> user9 this is such a bold accusation to make

user10 exbsf TELL US YOUR SECRETS

user11 THEY WERE TOGETHER FOR FIVE YEARS OMG 😭

--------------------------------------

THE PHONE CALL

a few months prior - during a conversation

Ex Bsf: Can you just support me for once instead of making it about you

Y/n: Support you? You cheated on Jacob how can I support you Ex Bsf

Ex Bsf: By being my friend instead of being all high and mighty

Y/n: I'm sorry Ex bsf but its true and I don't know if I can support you with this

Ex Bsf: What would you say if it was you who cheated on Lando

Y/n: Hypothetically, I say I cheated on Lando and be upfront with him

Ex Bsf: So have you cheated on Lando

Y/n: Of course not, I love him so much and he means to much to me, I don't ever wanna lose him

Ex Bsf: If you did ever, your gonna own up to it right

Y/n: Yeah of course I have to, but this isn't about me

Ex Bsf: Well you kinda did make it about you

Y/n: No I didn't, You asked me about it Ex Bsf

--------------------------------------

yourusername has posted

Liked by alexandrasaintmleux, francisca.cgomes and 11, 274, 964 others

yourusername and that marks the end of the wonderland tour! i can't believe everything that has happened over these past couple of months and i am so grateful for all the support i received from you guys over the past couple of months. stay tuned guys and ill see you at the grammys 👀

alexandrasaintmleux obsessed with you omggg

francisca.cgomes grammys this year are going to pop off

user1 SHES STUNNING STOP

user2 NEW MUSICC???

user3 girl we saw the article....

-> user4 what article????

-> user3 she cheated on lando

-> user5 WHAT

-> user6 source???

-> user7 theirs legit a voice recording of her and exbsf

-------------------------

Y/N L/N AND LANDO NORRIS SPLIT

Yes. You heard us right.

Fan favourite f1 couple, superstar WAG Y/n L/n and Lando Norris have reportedly split after L/n cheated on him. A leaked phone call between L/n and a third party has been leaked.

AUDIO RECORDING HERE

Transcript

Y/n: I cheated on Lando

Ex Bsf: You cheated on Lando

Y/n: Of course, I love him so much and he means to much to me, I don't ever wanna lose him

Ex Bsf: Your gonna own up to it right

Y/n: Yeah of course I have to

CLICK HERE TO READ MORE

----------------------------

yourusername has posted

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, francisca.cgomes and 1, 293, 950 others

yourusername 3 GRAMMYS!!!!!!!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! TYSM GUYS FOR ALL OF THE SUPPORT AND FOR TAKING WONDERLAND AND TURNING IT INTO SOMETHING ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL, WORDS CANNOT EXPRESS HOW AMAZED AND GRATEFUL I AM..........

alexandrasaintmleux WELL DESERVED

liked by creator

francisca.cgomes YAYAYAYAY OMMGGGGGG

liked by creator

user1 i used to have so much respect for you

user2 i can't believe u cheated so dissapointing

user3 your setting such a bad example for you younger fans...

user4 CANCEL Y/N

-> user5 yep #cancely/n #y/nisoverparty

-> user6 #y/nisoverparty

-> user7 #y/nisoverparty

-> user8 #y/nisoverparty

-> user9 #y/nisoverparty

-> user10 #y/nisoverparty

user11 🐍🐍🐍

user12 #y/nisoverparty

user13 🐍🐍🐍

user14 Ex/bsf deserves better

-> user15 her and lando should get together tbh

--------------------------------

Hi guys, i'm really sorry i am going to start posting more often but things have just been really busy as im starting grade 12 work which is insanely dissicult and family drama has been going on and i've been working on writing a book which is pretty exciting

anyways i will try to post more often - maybe once everyweekend or second weekend

------------------------

taglist:

@lyannesworld

@pippyth3hippy

@scorpiomindfuck

@syddddddddddddd

@paigem00

@toldyouitwasamelodrama

@lilsiz

@chelle1306

@sired4urmama

@stinkyjax

@kiyomisan

@hotgirlslikemax

@itsjustkhaos

@sid-is-gr8

@mastermindbaby

@akkklys

@reidsworld

@tall-tanned-tattoo

@mrsmaybank24

@m1892

@taliya8346282844eliviahdgdajs

@midnights-lily

@skynel09

[cashmoneyyysstuff]

"..did you just sniff me ?"

"no."

immediate, crisp. a little snappy, maybe a little too fast. the word leaves tomura's mouth in an instant.

"..you sure ?" your voice shakes, lips twitching to desperate hide your smile. tomura's eyes twitch and narrow, he notices. "yeah." he grits out. his voice remains forcibly even.

"tomu--"

"i wouldn't sniff you. that's fucking weird." he readjusts on the couch, grunting as he does so. you can tell he's desperately trying to make himself more comfortable, he refuses to look your way.

"well, if you just so happened to--"

"i didn't."

"hypothetically. if you did, i smell different because i changed my perfume. it smelled good and i wanted to try something different." you explain, continuing to scroll on your phone in an attempt to calm your boyfriend's nerves. snuggling into him again. no matter how many times you do it it still makes him stiffen the slightest bit, affection is something he can never quite get used to. he loosens up soon after. slowly leaning his shoulders to yours just slightly so he can feel the pressure, so you can feel his weight on you.

it takes him a minute before he grunts out a barely audible "smells good."

[requinoesis]

I know this is a weird question, but what exactly do the bigger sharks eat in your world? I know Rocky is a Great Hammerhead and they (as a species) are known to be other shark eaters, so is there like an alternative meat that they eat, or do they just stick to stingrays and bony fish?

That's a curious question, and I was quite inspired when I thought about how to answer it!✨

In the past, they used to hunt wild fish, but with the advent of the modern age, they stopped fishing and adapted entirely to the practice of pisciculture. 🐟✨

In a hypothetical future on this Earth, fish are incredibly larger and more abundant. Some have been domesticated, just as we humans used to do, and are treated with deep respect.

In order not to cover too much, I've focused only on the fish that have been domesticated for consumption in the region where my main characters live, called 'Aguazu'.🏝️✨

They are the descendants of species we know, such as Arapaima, Tuna, Tilapia, Sardines, Anchovies, Salmon, Cod, Octopus, Squid, Crab and Shrimp.

These are some of the typical dishes of the Aguazu region, most of which are variations on recipes handed down from the ancient human presence that marked this region a thousand years ago. Lots of seafood-based dishes with a spicy touch! 🌶️✨

Some of these dishes were inspired by real recipes from my country such as: Casquinha de Siri, Tuna Poke, Vatapá, Bobó de Camarão, Moqueca de Peixe, Octopus Rice, Acarajé, Cod Baked in Olive Oil, Cod Croquettes and the sweet dessert called Manjar, which is a coconut pudding with plum syrup!

Things like corn, wheat and other fruits, vegetables and animals domesticated by humans disappeared millions of years ago. So I wondered what other options they could find to use as the main ingredients.

Algae Flour, Palm Oil, Palm Butter, Coconut Milk, Palm Sugar, Domesticated Snake Eggs, Sea Salt. In the Santa Maré region, palm is widely used as the main ingredient, while other regions may prefer ingredients based on algae, for example.

Some domesticated fruits and vegetables are only used to season and enhance the flavor of dishes, but they don't make much difference to their bodies.

There was a time in the past when small and medium-sized sharks feared 'Niuhi', the name for large sharks that could devour smaller sharks such as the great white shark, great hammerhead shark, tiger shark and others.

However, this fear was unjustified, as when a smaller shark fell victim to a wild predator, the Niuhi were the first to be suspected. Fortunately, this has changed over time, although some small displays of prejudice still persist.

They eat several meals a day, and food is plentiful in this civilization, so the great sharks wouldn't need to devour their friends to satisfy their hunger, hehe.

And speaking of Roberto, my big hammerhead shark, if he gets really hungry, a Tuna Poke is enough to make him very happy and satiated! 🍣✨

[rikkiz]

Hiii! I was wondering if you can make the members give niki “the talk”

The Talk - Nishimura Riki

Riki walked into the living room of his dorm to see literally all of the other members gathered up there. It wouldn't be so weird that they were all there if it weren't for the way they were all eyeing him.

He'd just gotten back from spending time with you and they all knew he was out with you so he didn't get what all of those looks were for. It wasn't like he'd just gone out with no explanation and left for hours.

"What?" Riki asked, immediately sensing something was up.

"Come sit down, dude." Jake said.

Riki walked into the living room and plopped down on the couch, "What's going on?" He asked.

"We just wanted to talk to you about something." Jungwon told him.

"Is it something with work?" Riki asked.

"No, it's nothing like that." Jungwon answered.

"We just want to come to you as your friends and also your hyungs." Heeseung spoke up.

"About what?" Riki sighed, wanting them to just cut to the chase already.

"So, you know Y/n, right? And how she's your girlfriend?" Sunghoon started. Riki just shrugged, giving him a "No shit" look. "And like, how boyfriends and girlfriends like, have sex..." Sunghoon continued.

Riki groaned out, immediately knowing where this was going.

"We just wanted to make sure the two of you were being safe." Jay spoke up. "Have you guys...?" Jay trailed off but everyone knew what he was referring to.

"I don't see why you guys need to know that." Riki said. Your relationship was private to him, especially your sexual ventures. He wasn't the type to talk about that stuff with the other members because he felt it was unnecessary, especially when in a committed relationship. That was just him, though.

"Fine. But, like, hypothetically, if you two were, you'd have to be careful and wear a condom." Jake spoke up.

Riki looked away from all of them, he couldn't believe they were having this conversation right now. "Dude, obviously."

"Plus, you're still young, hell, we all are, so don't be doing anything stupid and end up getting her pregnant right now." Heeseung added.

"She's not going to get pregnant." Riki defensively said, just wanting this conversation to be over with.

"Is she taking birth control pills?" Sunoo asked.

"It's none of your guys' business." Riki tells them all.

"You're right, you're right." Jungwon agrees. "We just want you to be mindful, that's all." He adds.

"I am. We are." Riki tells them. "Is that all?" He then asked.

The other members all looked at one another before nodding, "Yeah." Heeseung responded for them.

"I'm going then." Riki started to leave the room.

"Please don't be having sex when we're here. No one wants to hear you guys doing that." Sunghoon calls out making Riki groan as he goes into the room and shuts the door before texting you all about the members "talk" with him.

[msmk11]

Marauder's Era HC's- How They React When You Ask Them If They'd Still Love You If You Were a Worm

(This is the most unserious thing I've ever written)

James

When you ask him the question, he is SO confused.

I mean, he has no connection to the muggle world, so he's never seen the trend.

James has endless questions for you: "What is the point of this question?" "Why are you a worm?" "Why am I not a worm?"

You have to beg him to stop asking questions and just answer yes or no.

James, of course, is a sweetheart. So even though he's still very confused, his response is lovely: "Well I reckon I'd love you in any universe in any form, so yes I would still love you, even if you were a worm."

Sirius

Sirius is not even fazed by the question.

He INSTANTLY answers yes.

His lack of hesitation makes you all giggly and happy.

But then, he asks you if you'd still love him if he were a worm.

Obviously, you say yes.

Side note: you two would totally have this conversation in bed before going to sleep because that's when you talk about all the weird shit.

Remus

His immediate response is an exasperated, tired sigh because he's so used to your shenanigans.

The first thing he'd say is, "Well am I a worm too?"

Once you tell him no, that he wouldn't be a worm, his answer to you is no because, "he's not attracted to worms?"

You try and explain to him that he'd still know it was you, you'd just be in worm form.

He doesn't budge on his answer and only replies that, "this seems too complicated for a hypothetical, dove."

Peter

I'm sorry, but he instantly laughs in your face after you ask the question because he thinks you're being goofy.

But when he realizes that you're 100% serious, he sobers up real fast.

"Wait, is that a genuine question?

My guy is SWEATING. He doesn't want to say the wrong thing.

He slowly drags out his answer to gauge your reaction and figure out the correct response.

"Nnnnnnnno-" (sees your face fall) "Yes! No yeah, yes, I'd totally still love you if you were a worm."

Lily

She's so happy you asked (if not a little mad that you beat her to it.)

I mean she's muggle born, so she's definitely seen the tik tok trend.

Answers with a giggle and happy, "Yes ofc, lovely."

She'd then go off on a little tangent about all the ways she'd treat you like royalty, even as a worm- she'd get the nicest soil, the best little habitat, etc.

Girl is so precious

Marlene

Marlene doesn't hesitate and instantly responds yes.

But honestly, I think she'd be way more interested to know if you'd still love her if she was a worm.

(There's only one right answer.)

I'm also certain that this question and variants of it would become her obsession for the next month.

Like every day she'd ask you the same question but with a new animal: "Would you still love me if I were a frog?" "A penguin?" "A squirrel?"

Dorcas

Babe is too logical to answer this question.

She's instantly coming up with solutions/alternative answers rather than just saying yes or no.

"I wouldn't need to worry about this, because I'd just turn you back into a human."

Starts listing off all the spells or potions she could use to turn you back into a human.

When you try to protest and tell her that that wouldn't be possible, she'd only take it as a challenge.

Would literally come up with her own spell or potion to prove a point if necessary.

Mary

Her answer is yes

Why? Because she "loves worms and loves you. What's not to love?"

I'm pretty sure this question doesn't linger on her mind very long. But worms do.

Within the week she has a pet worm and a whole habitat for it.

Might even name it after you (which is a ?compliment?)

Regulus

Regulus isn't fazed by the question, but that doesn't mean he will give in to your shenanigans.

Immediately responds no.

Despite your pouty lips and frown, he does not budge.

You say, "So you don't really love me unconditionally?"

"Just be glad you're not a worm."

[kedreeva]

#we spoke of this a LOT at work after that one tech was murdered and hidden in a wall

hi!👋 hello! kedreeva! i’m going to need to ask you to explain this!!!!

So back in 2009, a lab student named Annie Le was murdered at Yale university. Cameras saw her going on into a building, but not out again and it was like, the eve of her wedding (or close to? I don't remember) so clearly she had places to be and people waiting for her so they immediately started looking and the next day (or so? Anyway on the day of her wedding) they found her body in a recess in a wall, down in the areas where the research animals were kept. It turns out, a tech had killed her, but since there were cameras like EVERYWHERE, he just, I guess, left her there. Well, hid the body where it was. I don't remember how they caught him, but they did. It was a horrifying story. It still is.

And it was a huge news story among the folks at my workplace because, at the time, I was working at a different university, as an animal husbandry technician. As you can imagine this was a kind of intense time to be in that situation. They started offering, like, I'm not gonna say counseling but it was "if you need to talk we would prefer you talk to us about something wrong rather than kill anyone about it" and as techs (even if we were not even the same kind of tech, the killer was a lab tech and we were husbandry techs but I think a lot of people assumed it had been a husbandry tech since she was in an animal area), we were kind of getting the side eye from lab people for weeks afterwards. Like they thought we were gonna go "wow that's a fantastic idea, you're next!" or something, idk. And I mean like, people would freeze when you were alone in a hallway, or turn and walk the other way, or duck into the nearest room and watch you walk past, and they were all being super nice/civil to us when they did have to interact. It was very atypical behavior for lab people. Like not all of them, some of them had always been nice and weren't worried, but some of the people who had been unbelievable dicks previously were walking on eggshells. And the people who had friends in other universities reported this was happening at their jobs, too.

And instead of talking to The Man (because all the higher ups were garbage at the time), we just. talked among ourselves. It was a lot of "I may say I feel like strangling lab people sometimes when they do things that drive me up a wall but I don't MEAN it you know that right" and it also led to group discussions of what would be a theoretical *better* solution to hiding a body than what happened, with clear disdain for doing things like hiding bodies in walls, which is a terrible idea and one we would never do (looking at the people who think we might have decided this was a great idea actually).

Which consequently led to a lot of supervisors and/or managers that happened to overhear us bringing us donuts or arranging pizza for lunch in like, some kind of bid to help us feel appreciated, I guess, so that we wouldn't murder anyone, even though none of us were going to do that anyway. But also none of us were in a position to turn down free donuts or pizza or whatever.

And then after a few weeks, maybe a month or so, people just kind of forgot and moved on and things went back to normal like fifty people hadn't spent every lunch hour for weeks talking quietly among themselves about how human bodies would definitely fit into a carcass disposal barrel or that you'd have to crush hip bones and/or skulls before incineration. Hypothetically.

Like I said, it was a VERY weird time to be at my job, and every time I remember it happening feels like a fever dream. I can't even imagine what it was like at Yale.

[semisolidmind]

That anon made me think about a hypothetical scenario of Peng trying to move up on Reader, but tbh I don't think Peng would EVER stand a chance against the twice as bad AU monkey husband duo.

Azure contantly gets the L but he is nice to Reader + he's friends enough with the two warlords to not make them immediately consider killing him if he treats Reader a lil too nicely in the beginning.

He's suspicious but he's a likeable guy, so it's not too weird of him to be genuinely polite to the queen of FFM.

Peng, though? bro's getting COOKED. literally. He's not slick like Azure, if he tried anything it'd be over for him. He's a bird-shaped mean girl, so it would immediately draw suspicion on everyone if he suddenly started being super nice to Reader after being so vocal of his disapproval towards a human queen.

I bet Wukong and Macaque (especially macaque since peng likes antagonizing him so much) would love to have a reason to destroy him in a fight 💀

FR.

like, this feathery fuck could make that mental and emotional switch from "ugh, mortals" to "but this one's kinda ok/how funny would it be to steal her" and you can bet the boys (but mostly macaque) would be on them in a second. there is no way they wouldn't clock the birds' intent the minute the bastard sidles up to reader. they sorta trust azure, they're fine with yellowtusk, but the monkeys KNOW that you canNOT trust peng.

any time the bird has the chance to get reader alone, macaque makes sure to be there or at least within striking distance. he knows reader doesn't trust peng either (and why would she, after their history of shit talking and belittling her), so he's not worried about her falling for any smooth talking, but he is worried that they might cross a line.

i could see this situation coming to a head with peng making some sort of big move on reader, mac hears it and stops it, then challenges them to a fight (like a serious challenge, to the death kinda shit).

and while wukong wants to make that bird into a roast as much as his brother, he knows that it'll be important for macaque to beat the shit out of peng by himself. despite knowing how dangerous the monkey bros can be, peng continued to poke and prod and test the limits of macaque's patience. the monkey king won't deprive his brother of getting to serve some well-deserved comeuppance. in fact, he makes a sort of show of it, announcing the fight and inviting his allies to watch.

the battle is a brutal one. normally wukong is the one to fly into a jealous rage at any slight against reader, while mac is the one to keep a cool head. but this time, the shadowy simian lets aaaaall that carefully controlled anger out in a truly vicious display of power. the bird demon has a tough time keeping up with their rival's attacks. though both combatants take some heavy hits, it's clear that peng is losing.

like. macaque could beat peng to death here, and there really wouldn't be anything anyone could do. the bird broke a rule. they pissed off the wrong demon at the wrong time. given their history, nobody has any reason to stop macaque from slaughtering his rival, and it'd be within his rights to kill them for disrespecting his wife. wukong finds it all far too hilarious to do anything but laugh at peng getting their ass handed to them, and reader knows it's going too far but won't speak on peng's behalf (both because she doesn't like them and she feels like she has no right to deprive mac of his revenge).

azure would have to beg a pardon on behalf of his stupid chicken of a sworn brother before they actually die.

wukong is hesitant to grant it. azure knows what that birdbrain did. they laid hands on the monkey king's queen, and he knows wukong has killed others for far less. that miserable pile of feathers should consider themselves lucky that the monkey king hasn't joined in on their punishment. if azure didn't want his lackey to get beaten bloody, he should've kept them in check. not to mention the fact that peng has had this macaque-issued beat down coming for a loooong time.

by the end of it, peng is nothing more than a crumpled pile of bloody feathers in the dirt. azure and yellowtusk have to scrape them off the ground and portal back to camel ridge in disgrace and defeat. they don't show their faces on flower fruit mountain for a good long while.

as for macaque...despite being clawed, tired, and a little bruised, he reigns victorious. in his adrenaline induced stupor, still covered in dirt and blood, he storms right up to reader and steals a nice, long kiss. it leaves her lightheaded, his hands on her the only thing keeping her up. he huskily promises that they'll "celebrate his victory" later. reader feels a little faint.

wukong would normally protest his brother getting peaches all to himself, but after that fight? eh, he's earned it.

[aspiringroleplays]

He flinched automatically at the snarl, remembering too late how the boy felt about it. And then he gasps at the sudden lurch, a half shout as instinct makes him shove against the black helmet to attempt to get him to let go. "Hey-!" He says automatically in a frustrated whine. This was why he didn't want to talk to the other boy. He always wanted to fight, he was always mean, he was always like this-.

"That isn't my name! My name is Vanitas."

He stops his struggling, but he's pointedly looking away from him as he chokes down his retort. His eyes flash angrily, even as he's half blinded by tears. The name sounded so ominous, and strange. And worst of all it suited him. The dark suit, the monsters that came from him- such a strange, serious sounded name actually fit him perfectly. It sounded like a villain's name.

"Now say my name properly."

His whole body tenses, stubborn insistence coming back with a vengeance thanks to his emotionally vulnerable state. 'I won't - I won't!' He thinks. "Let me go," he says instead, moving his hands to push at the other boy's chest and shoulders. "I don't wanna fight!"

"What do I have to do to you to make you stop calling me that!?" Vanitas snarls. Whatever he had been intending on doing is thrown to the wayside as he reaches down to grab Sora by the front of his shirt. He yanks him up to his feet, frustration melting over.

"That isn't my name! My name is Vanitas," he says, slowly, as if Sora is stupid. Vanitas was nothing but himself, not whatever fantasy Sora had constructed in his head. His identity was his own after so long of being a part of something else.

But nothing he did to Sora stuck. He could hurt him as much as he wanted, and the boy would disappear and then be back later like nothing had ever happened. It was infuriating.

He doesn't want to feed off him. Not anymore. His appetite is gone. "Now say my name properly."

[cupidddd-d]

Sorry for the spam liking, your Vic's are truly amazing! <3

I was wondering if you could maybe make a yule ball fic with Regulus Black? Maybe how he asked her or the day of it ! 💗

no omg don't apologize for spam liking 😭 i truly don't gaf, it makes me happy to see that people are enjoying my writing :)

i hope you like it !!

heart burn

"no, that's stupid! stupid, stupid, stupid! why would she want roses? she has a pollen allergy!" regulus paced around his dorm, raking a hand through his now unruly curls.

once pristine, his anxious habits had caused his hair to become frizzy and tangled. his eyes were wide and bloodshot, his tie loosened and hanging limply down his wrinkled shirt.

"reg, who are you talking to- oh. should i come back later?" evan rosier poked his head into the room, hiding a laugh behind his hand. "why do you look like that?"

"shut up, i know!" regulus complained.

"does this have something to do with a certain girl? the yule ball's coming up-"

"you think i don't know that?!" regulus hissed frantically before clearing his throat to regain his composure. "excuse me. i was just trying to figure out a way to ask y/n out to the yule ball."

"that's easy, innit? just ask her. maybe some flowers, chocolates, i dunno. don't girls like that sort of thing?" evan shrugged. "anyway, i just wanted to come up here and tell you to shut the hell up. we can all hear you pacing around from the common room, so...."

sirius cooed at his little brother, pinching his gaunt cheeks. "my baby brother has finally come to me for advice on girls! i always knew this day would come! should i get balloons for this very special occasion?"

"don't make it weird," regulus rolled his eyes as he pushed sirius away. "it's just...a hypothetical situation, is all. how would one...not me, by the way....go about inviting someone to the yule ball? hypothetically, of course."

"well...hypothetically, what kinds of things does this person like? hypothetically, you should just center the invite around that person. i think you're overthinking this way too much, reggie."

"well, that's no help! obviously i should go for what she-- i mean...um, what this person likes. you've never had trouble with girls, so of course you wouldn't be able to offer any real advice..." regulus sulked.

sirius chuckled quietly, poking regulus' forehead. "c'mon kid, don't be like that. that's just the thing: it doesn't always have to be some big, monumental gesture. it's the quieter, more intimate stuff that they hold closer to their hearts. think love letters, buying that item they've been talking about for ages. to be loved is to be seen-- that's their favorite quote. that's why i told you to center everything around what she likes."

"you know, i don't care what everyone else says about you. you're actually pretty smart sometimes."

"thanks, reggie!" sirius beamed. "hey, wait a minute..."

"can i take you to the yule ball?" regulus blurted in the middle of your study date. "i-i mean, i had this whole plan, and sirius gave me advice and everything, but you just look so...pretty right now, so i just wanted to ask anyway. um, i'll just shut up now."

you let out a quiet laugh, the sound washing over him like warm ganache. "yes, reg. we'll go to the yule ball together."

"um...thank you." regulus cleared his throat in an attempt to appear nonchalant. "so...where were we? transfiguring candles?"

[prettyboykatsuki]

keep me close to you | i. yoichi

✮ tags ; childhood best friends to lovers / idiots to lovers, reader is implied to have grown up a tomboy, stereotypical shoujo manga tropes rip, reader wears makeup, a lot of sexual tension, kissing, confessions 18+

✮ wc ; 3.6k (i don't know. don't ask me.)

✮ a/n ; the worlds most self-indulgent horseshit in the world. sorry! but im not at all actually. this is the very typical 'i didn't see you that way until i realize i did the whole time.' bc i love that trope and i love isagi ok....

reader in this kind of feels awkward in her femininity and that appears in the fic more than once!! please be forewarned.

✮ synopsis ; isagi has never seen you as much more of a friend. so he thought at least.

Isagi is in love with you.

He isn't sure when that happened. He'd love to be know but in all truth - there was never any big eureka moment that made such a thing apparent. If Isagi had to think of all the moments he maybe, sort-of, possibly loved you, they come up to him as bits of nothing-much memories.

That's exactly the problem, really. A long few years of little nothings, accumulated over time, Isagi finds that his whole life has been made up of you. There was no grand gestures of confessions or singular standout moments for him to mull over.

But there was rough-housing with you back when your hair was a little shorter and your chest a little less noticeable. And there was plenty of bike races to the store for ice-cream, and lots of bonding over music you both liked. Isagi remembers sitting on your floor in the 6th grade and watching you play video games much better than he ever could.

A lot that stuff persisted into your teen years, and even into adulthood. Isagi has never thought of it as weird. Play fighting or bike races or being reckless together felt natural - and in some ways, you were the only person who ever brought that out of him.

It was normal. You were friends and you got along as friends. Isagi never thought about it any more than that.

Just a few months ago, you got a boyfriend. Said boyfriend didn't think your friendship with Isagi was entirely appropriate. He had approached Isagi first. You talked to Isagi after, said you'd still hang out but no more rough-housing and that was that.

Isagi had heard about your boyfriend, though you didn't talk about him much. And after meeting him, it was easy enough to conclude that he was genuinely a good guy. Objectively good for you, accepting of your personality, kind and thoughtful. A good stable job There was nothing bad he could say about him. He wished there was.

"Just the being touchy. I know you two don't think anything of it since you've been friends for so long," He leans in, friendly, as he pats Isagis shoulder "But you wouldn't like if your girlfriend was being touchy with another guy right?"

Isagi had nothing to say. He'd never thought about. Never had a proper girlfriend, though he was interested in a few girls. He'd lost his virginity out of the country and had some hook-ups and talking stages. Never a girlfriend.

Would it bother him? He couldn't say. He didn't know who to think of. There was not a hypothetical girl he could conjure to give him a conclusion. Ultimately dazed, Isagi had replied with something along the lines of "Yeah man, I get it," and then left for practice without turning his back.

It bothered him for weeks. He couldn't do anything without pondering that very question. He couldn't stop thinking about the way he'd described you as his girlfriend. You'd always been a friend, and Isagi knows you as a girl. But you're you before that, and he's never quite put both things next to each other.

But he'd never even thought to look at you as a girlfriend. He brushed off such comments and so did you. You were his friend. One of the very best. You'd know each other until you die, and in a way - this is just proof of your next stage of life. You'd settle down with a partner and so would he and everything would be fine.

But, the thing was - he'd never actually conjured up the future. There was never any assured belief that you'd go and find someone to nest with so soon. It felt unnatural. Disorienting. There was an order to this strange and mad world and your relationship went against it.

Even in thinking that, it'd take Isagi weeks to figure out the extent of his feelings. Weeks of practicing, of going on group dates with his team, of drinking. Weeks of missing you. Being conscious of the sudden absence of his very best friend in the world. You still saw him but it was no longer every other day. And you still called and texted, still told him stupid stuff about your life.

But he'd go on Instagram and see pictures of you from someone else's account. You'd be wearing something he'd never seen you in before. It was pretty. You were prettier. He'd never thought about that before, if only to say that you were and always had been. And plenty of guys had noticed in highschool, too. He'd never thought about it then either.

Isagi had never really considered a lot of things. It didn't dawn on him that he loved you until Bachira pried the information out of him one night on the road.

("Yocchan is stupid,"

Isagi leans on the bench in the locker room and frowns, throwing a confused look Bachira's.

"What the hell? For what?"

It's not Bachira who tells him the information - but Rin, who walks towards his own locker with a tired expression and a towel around his shoulder.

"You're in love with her, you stupid jackass.")

Right. It'd been Rin who told it to him straight, and Rin would know a thing about love. Apparently he'd been with the same girl since highschool and he knew a thing or two. For Rin to tell Isagi such a thing made Isagi really think on it, and when Isagi finally sat down and thought about it - it was clear that he was head over heels in love.

Isagi is in love with you. It has been a tremendous pain in the ass trying to live with this information. It made sense - it really did. It made sense that everything suddenly felt so wrong. It made sense that he never new anything about love and that he could never keep a relationship.

When he thought about it, he'd never stop comparing everyone to you. If it were you—you'd be clumsy at fancy restaurants but it'd still be so much fun to go. If it were you—he might've cared much more about valentines day chocolates. It would've been so novel, so lovely - to imagine how hastily you would've made them. Not obligatory friendship chocolates but something just for him.

If it were you, he might've wanted to buy you expensive things. They'd be different. Clothes and shoes but game consoles and concert tickets. If it were you, he'd always take his sports car. He might've liked the way you fawned over them, with that wide-eyed sense of adventure he's spent his whole life getting to know.

Yes if it were you, Isagi might've gotten angry. Now that he knows, the idea you're getting so touchy-feely with another guy makes him sick. He knows he has no right to feel that way, but he can't exactly help the feeling either.

From the start, if Isagi had realized love started and ended with you, then maybe he would know a thing or two about love by now. He might've cared more about everything, had he realized it even a little sooner.

A few months ago would've sufficed.

Isagi is in love with you.

He has no idea if you feel the same, but in a way that doesn't change anything.

He's seated on his couch, alone in his apartment - and thinking wistfully that he probably has been this whole time.

He looks around his apartment, feeling a little sorry for himself. He's drinking. Even this tipsy, his mind is clouded with memories. You looked at this place together and you helped Isagi move in many months ago.

A place with a good view of the city, Isagi stands to his feet and watches near the cool glass of the window.

It takes him a while to hear his phone ring. When he does, he almost feels like he's hallucinating when he sees your name on the other side. He stares, wonders if the kami like playing malicious tricks on him, and then picks up.

He speaks slowly.

"Hello?"

He knows your crying, even though you're trying harder to hide it. That desperate sniffle that you get is an easy tell.

"Yoichi," You mutter, soft and sad "Can you come to the park?"

"At this hour? It's late. Your boyfriend is gonna be pissed."

You hiccup on the other side of the line. Isagi wants to run to you as soon as possible.

"Just come," You sniffle again, a little sadder. You're crying this time forreal "...I want to see you."

"Okay. Are you alone?"

"Mm,"

"Stay on the phone with me. I'll come soon. Stay on the line."

"Okay."

__

Isagi comes to find you at the park like you've asked. He keeps you on the line the entire Uber ride there and then as he comes through the playground to find you.

Somehow, he knows exactly where you'll be. It's the park you two grew up coming to. It's dark out, damp from the night, and Isagi finds you tucked in the same corner you always are.

You still fit there somehow, just beneath the slide. It's a big space, enough for two people. So, wordless, Isagi climbs into the little box and sits next to you. Close but not close enough, he hangs up the phone and turns his head to stare at you.

"I'm here," He says, mostly because he doesn't know what else to say.

You look up at him, obviously having been crying. You're wearing a sweatshirt and shorts, but your face has some light make-up on it like you were on a date. He forces himself not to frown as you gaze at him - pouting.

"You're here." You repeat, like you don't know what else to say. You lean your head on his shoulder. It's the most natural feeling in the world, but right now - it makes his breath hitch "Thanks for comin'"

"Are you gonna tell me what happened?"

"Well I don't want to."

"Can you really say that after crying like a baby, begging for me to come over, huh? All I want to see you—"

You elbow him without mercy.

"Shut up you jackass. Sorry to interrupt your late night jerk-off session with my tears."

It's not said with any malice, a joke - but there's insecurity laced in. Sorry for making you come see me, you want to say he's sure. He shakes his head.

"I could've been hooking up with a girl."

"Yeah? It's a miracle anyone would wanna get your dick wet, you should go back and finish the job,"

"Can't," Isagi mumbles, trying not to look at you closely "Some girl is making my shoulder wet instead though."

"Sorry," You croak, so horrifyingly sincere Isagi doesn't know how he's keeping himself upright "I can move."

"I was kidding," He says, hurriedly "It's fine. It reminds me of when we we're kids."

You huff a laugh.

"You only remember annoying stuff."

He mumbles something in agreement before there's a brief bout of silence. He speaks again first.

"Gonna tell me what happened?"

"We broke up," You mumble. Isagi feels his heart race, immediately riddled with guilt afterwards. "He broke up with me."

"I thought things were going well?"

"They were," You sniffle. It's the first time in your lives you've opened up to each other about something like this. You've talked about it, but it was always more him talking and you listening. He'd never heard about your crushes before.

In such a vulnerable, innocent position. Alone with him, confiding in him. He wants to stay with you forever "He was really good to me."

"So what? Why'd you break up?"

"I didn't love him. I liked him. And I thought I'd come to love him, but I didn't...I just couldn't love him. He knew it too, so he broke up with me."

"Was he mean about it?"

You laugh.

"Course not. He's one of the nicest guys I've ever met in my whole life. Told you, he was good to me."

"So then...? Are you sad about hurting his feelings?"

You nod, almost meek.

Isagi loves you more than life itself, he thinks.

"I wanted to love him. I thought I could."

"Why couldn't you?"

A brief pause of silence. You're debating on what to say before you seem to settle on something.

"Already someone else."

"Someone else? You love someone else?"

A whisper of hope. So small Isagi almost can't bear it. You nod.

"And what about them?"

"Doesn't love me back."

"How long?" His voice is shaking. He has no idea if you can tell. You laugh.

"A long time."

"Do I know him?"

You laugh again, a little throatier. More melancholy. Isagi feels like he's looking into an abyss. A dangerous place to fall in if he's not careful. He's already in love, already too deep. But he already steeled himself not to hope too much.

"You do know him, I guess."

"Tell me about him," Isagi almost urges. He has to be sure. He has to be sure this isn't one long dream, and that everything is real. "What he's like."

You look at him surprised.

"I thought you hated when I talked about stuff like this?"

"Changed my mind."

"Weirdo. It's nothin' special. We've known each other a while. We get along well. He likes the stuff I do and I like being around him."

"When'd you realized you loved him?"

"Middle school? Probably."

Ah. You've known each other a little longer than that, haven't you?

"You're being awfully secretive about it. Nothing more specific?"

You frown at him.

"Piss off. Go back to not caring about it. It's a dark part of my past and I already gave up on it forever ago."

"What if..." Isagi swallows. He's really the dumbest guy in the entire world for this. It could always be someone else. He knows that. "If your feelings were returned? What then?"

"I've never thought about it," You say, not even considering it might be the case "I'd be happy but I don't see the point in getting my hopes up. His type in girls is like...cuter I guess."

Isagi wants to knock himself out. Idiot. He's gone and ruined his own chances. He wish he could go back and kick the ass of his highschool self. If he called you cute right now, you'd definitely think he was trying to coddle your feelings. You are cute to him.

He can't get the words out.

"And you don't think you are?"

You shoot him a surprised look then burst out into laughter.

"Well, no. Daisuke used to say it but I don't know. Most guys wouldn't think of me as...cute? Sexy maybe? Apparently some of the guys from department see it that way."

Aah. Isagi hates this. He hates hearing that guys name without honorifics. His first name, at that.

"You should listen to the guy you used to date and not whatever knuckleheads you go to school with."

"Are you saying I'm cute, Yoichi? Started feeling bad?"

"It's not pity, alright? But you're not..not cute."

You pause before breaking out in genuine, unruly laughter. Isagi adores the sound of your voice, adores every inch of you as you giggle yourself into a fit.

"You'll never get a girlfriend like that. You have to at least be able to pretend."

It's not pretending. He wants to tell you that you're cute. The way you laugh is cute and the look you get playing stupid claw machine games is cute and the way you get excited by the 7/11 carrying your favorite things is cute. It's never been different and you still look so delighted. Everything about you is cute. Isagi wants to say all that, and that he finds you sexy too. For different, ordinary reasons those stupid guys in your department could never begin to know.

But words are useless - inconceivably pointless to try and make you understand.

"You're cute," He says first, staring at the place in front of him. Then adds "That's not pity."

"So you know how to smooth talk too?"

"It's not that either."

"Then what is it?" Your voice is wavering.

Now or never.

"A confession."

Isagi feels you tense. Feels you freeze. You start to stutter another joking, lifting your head from his shoulder to turn away but Isagi is quicker. Quick to hold your shoulder, to turn you towards him, to hold your cheek and make you look his face.

"Yoichi?"

"Is it me? Am I the person you like?"

You shake your head trying to look away.

"I don't want to answer that."

"I like you," Isagi grips your shoulder tighter, presses his forehead against yours as he holds on for dear life with hope "I only figured it out recently."

A bout of silence passes before your voice sounds again. It's shaking so hard. Isagi can hear how hard your heart is beating.

"This is fucking mean." You whisper. He frowns at you.

"Do I look like I'm joking? Huh? Does it even kind of seem like that?"

"But since when?" You're arguing. Isagi just confessed his undying love for you and you're arguing with him about it. It's so you. "I'm not even your type."

"No one is my type but you, you idiot." Isagi is exasperated explaining this. It's embarrassing but he's a lot of time to reflect and this is as true as it gets "Every single time I'd ever tried dating someone else or doing things with them - I didn't care. I just did it without thinking. But I always thought if it was you...I'd always want it to be you."

"You're not attracted to me." You assert, maybe trying to compensate.

"Fuck you, I couldn't tell you that you were hot to your face. You kicked my ass every time I mentioned the fact your tits got bigger in highsc—"

You shove him with your shoulder.

"Because you talk about it like that you shitty jock." You hiss.

"Then what do you want me to say?" Isagi mumbles, looking at you "I think you're sexy. What else is there?"

"God this is so embarrassing,"

"I'm being serious," Isagi adds, pouting, face flush with heat "You're just...you've always been attractive I guess."

You give him a small frown. Isagi thinks it's the cutest thing in the world. He wants to kiss you absolutely fucking stupid.

"Are you sure? Like really sure?"

He snorts, laughing humorlessly.

"I've been agonizing about it for weeks. Yes I'm sure."

"What if I told you to kiss me? Could you do it?"

Isagi stares at you in disbelief. He turns himself slightly, staring at you before reaching his hand out towards your cheek. You make a soft noise of surprise as he brushes his thumb underneath your eye. Your face is so hot it's burning against the palm of his hand. He lets his hand settle on the back of your neck before leaning into kiss you.

He kisses you hard but slow. Passion imbued into each tiny movement, drawing as deep as he can go without pushing his tongue between your lips.

You let out a soft moan that makes him pull away, eyes widened. Humiliated you try to shove him away, but Isagi manages to catch you by your wrist.

"Is it starting to click or do you need me to prove it one more time?"

"Ugh. Fuck, you're so,"

He grins wolfishly as he stares at you, watching you shrink so slightly under his gaze. He's not used to winning against you in any capacity with the exception of soccer. It feels good.

"I'm so?"

"Annoying."

"That's it?" He leans in again, lips brushing your cheek and pressing a kiss to it before moving down. He presses kisses down your jaw, relishing in the way you squirm. "Nothing else to add?"

"You're enjoying this too much, Yoichi," You reprimand, though you don't make any effort to move "Are you fishing for compliments?"

"I'm wondering if you find me sexy too, that's all."

You pause before leaning in. He watches the gears turn in your brain before turning your voice low.

"Wanna touch me and find out yourself?"

He pulls away instantly in shock as you blink at him innocently. There's an air of smugness about you. He feels his face burn red immediately, blood rushing up into his brain. He tucks his chin looking away from you. His brain feels like it's full of static.

He's embarrassed. By what you've said but more by how naturally everything falls into place. By how effected he is by something so simple. It usually takes so much more to get him like this.

"What the hell was'at..."

"Karma. Don't be all cocky. I've known about my feelings way longer than you."

"Didn't think you'd know jackshit about stuff like that though."

"Just cause I spare you my sex stories doesn't mean they don't exist."

Isagi feels a pang of irritation as he scoffs.

"I don't want hear about them now either."

"I thought you weren't the jealous type?"

"I just wasn't that into any of those girls."

"But you're into me? Enough that you get jealous?"

Isagi laughs at that.

"Yeah. I'm way more into you than you're ever gonna get through your head anyways."

"The fuck is that supposed to mean?"

"Means I wanna get all lovey-dovey with you and embarrass you all the time."

You flush and Isagi feels like he's won. Instead of feeling elated or cocky, this time he just feels a little dazed. He stares at you through lidded eyes.

"I'm so into you," Isagi mutters, leaning his head against your shoulder "You're never gonna get it unless you look in my brain,"

You pause momentarily, leaning back enough that Isagi sits up. He looks at you curiously before he feels you tap foreheads. You close your eyes and hum, before peeking just one open.

"I looked," You say softly "I still win,"

Isagi groans internally. God. God you're so fucking cute. It's so you and it's so cute and he loves you.

"Can I please kiss you again?"

"You don't have to ask every time."

"No takebacks."

Isagi leans in again, to kiss you a little softer this time. When he pulls away, the look on your face makes him want to do it all over again. You'll be here all night if he doesn't get a hold of himself.

"You wanna come over to my place?"

"Isn't a little early for that?"

Isagi knocks your foreheads together.

"Not like that. It's late and the trains aren't running. I don't want you taking a cab,"

"I'm a big girl, Yoichi," You say sardonically "If you want me to stay over, just ask. You're still my best friend, dummy." You add the last part a little softer.

He grabs your hand.

"Then stay with me."

You nod.

"Okay. And we can have sex if you want."

"Fuck yeah."

[pickleskisser]

hii!! I really liked your pickles headcanons and the part about meeting his family was my favorite! if you have the time could I request hcs for meeting the family for the rest of the boys? if not the rest of them then just skwisgaar would be fine!

remember to drink water, eat a snack, and take plenty of breaks!

(ps can i be spade anon?)

HIIII !! Omg thank you sm I had a lot of fun with it lolz. And yeah I can so do that for you :p fair warning it's very improvised since info on these dude's parents are scarce but I hope it's enjoyable anyways ☆

Meeting the Parents HCs

Nathan Explosion

The one you have to worry least about, his parents are sweethearts.

Though his mom will have an eye on you both the whole time.

I feel like Nathan has a record of getting entangled with people who were not so good for him, so it isn't personal or anything she's just on the fence at first.

Once she realizes you're not like that, though, and genuinely love Nathan and, in turn, treat him how he deserves, she's alllllllll over you.

She's going to want your number, your Skype, your Facebook, everything.

She'll pull out the baby pictures too. It greatly embarrasses your brutal boyfriend.

His dad would be the same, on the fence a little, but he overall trusts Nathan a little more.

He might try to plan a fishing trip, though, and Nathan is going to be all over that, so good luck getting out of that if you viscerally dislike fishing.

Overall, don't sweat it! As long as you treat their boy right, they love you, and you might as well be family now.

Toki Wartooth

Oh boy. So I'm not sure you could ever really meet his parents?

He doesn't like talking about them. You probably didn't even learn anything about them until late in your relationship.

If you were to hypothetically meet them, well, you're only meeting his mom.

Aslaug would be dead at this point so there wouldn't be much of an option.

Anja is a cold woman with high unachievable standards. So don't take the fact she won't even speak to you too personally.

If you're religious in the Christian sense, you might have a small chance of approval… but then again, you're dating Toki Wartooth of Dethklok, and you had to learn about him somewhere. Goddamn devil music.

Don't even waste your breath. All that matters is how much you and Toki love each other.

William Murderface

It's not willing on his part at all.

Stella is showing up unannounced, ranting and raving about not telling her he finally got hitched, and he must just want her to die or something.

He's snippy and miserable the whole time. Not miserable in the same sense Pickles was, he's more annoyed than anything.

Stella isn't the most gentle woman. She's abrasive and loud and can be partial to physical violence, but she does care a little bit about her grandson.

She really sucks at showing it, and definitely fucked him up with her parenting style (if his emotional constipation and short fuse didn't make that clear) but she did step up when his parents died instead of letting him go through the system, so.

All this to say, she's giving you a shotgun talk.

William will pry it out of her hands, of course, and curse her out for it, but it's happening !!

After that, though, don't worry, you're family now. Actually, maybe you should worry.

This means that whatever small politeness she whipped up before is long gone, you're a Murderface now, you are going to get treated like one.

Although William couldn't care less about his grandmother's opinion, he cares about yours. So, to see you embracing his family in full stride without getting scared off is more than heartwarming to him.

Skwisgaar Skwigelf

Again, it's fully unwilling on his end. It would honestly have to be something you want.

I think it's needless to say his relationship with his mom is weird. He truthfully wouldn't mind never seeing her again, especially after the events of fatherklok.

But again, if you really, really, want it then, yeah, he'll take you down to Sweden.

Surfetta doesn't have much of an opinion on you. What you are to her son is no concern to her.

She's most likely tipsy the whole time and disappearing for periods at a time.

The whole thing will feel like a waste of time, and Skwisgaar is stressed.

Don't worry he just needs to play his Thunderhorse for a few hours, and maybe a little bit of laying on top of you with his head on your chest listening to the sound of your heartbeat… just a little.

[intimidatingpuffinstudios]

Thanks for all the things you've written and done for us Puffin! ❤️

TSSW and BTM has been one of the interactive stories that has brought me comfort and happiness during my lowest point. I really appreciate the effort and creativity you have to write these stories and wonderful characters.

I'm not sure if this has been asked on the sin stones or BTM NSFW asks yet and sorry if I sound weird but...

In this hypothetical scenario, let's say the MC and RO haven't had sex for a while because... well– things had gotten hectic and haywire so they couldn't have the proper time to settle down, maybe to a point where everyone is too preoccupied.

But one night, just when the RO is preoccupied by their thoughts, they overhear and catch the MC getting off and moaning their name. And when MC realizes they caught them, they quietly admit that they haven't initiated sex with RO because they were worried that they would be burdensome.

Like– even if the MC wanted to have sex so bad, they couldn't bring themselves to bring it up at all because of that lingering feeling of being too much.

As an easily anxious and self-conscious individual myself, it's really hard for me to ask people for things I want to do without feeling like I'm being an embarrassment or a burden even if I badly desire it.

So how would the ROs deal with an MC like this? Thanks Puffin! I apologize that my ask is too long 😭

Thank you, anon 🥹 I needed to hear that today...

As for your question!

Morkai would immediately get into the mood if he caught the MC doing that. He wouldn't be able to hold back a rumbly groan before advancing toward the MC, making eye contact and saying, "Let me help you with that." Once he finds out about MC's reasons, he frowns and clutches them closer. His response is like, "I guess I'll have to make sure to give it to you even more so that you never miss it." If he's always around, then the MC will never have to feel alone and like they have only themselves to depend on.

Straasa immediately stops moving, and his eyes zero in on the pleasured wxpression on the MC's face. After a heated second, he clears his throat so that the MC notices him, and then he breathlessly asks if he can stay to watch. Or to help. Once the real issue comes to light, he gathers the MC in his arms and cradles their face, his gaze and voice so serious and concerned as he asks, "What can I do to help you see that being with you and giving you anything and everything you need is my privilege, my joy, my greatest honor. Never a burden."

Daelynn would freeze for a single millisecond before moaning loudly and prowling her way to the MC lightning fast. She falls upon them with greedy hands and hungry mouth before they get the chance to say anything. Once she's had her fill and the MC admits the real issue, Daelynn frowns for a second before suggesting in all seriousness that she and the MC just drop everything that keeps them busy and elope somewhere far away. "Nothing matters except you. Always."

Eledwen would become a pillar of salt tbh LMAO! She is rooted to the spot, both aroused and confused. She doesn't know what to do, should she keep watching (she wants to) or is that inappropriate? But if she moves away, she could disturb the MC... Maybe she should just close her eyes or...? Long story short, she doesn't join in unless directly acknowledged and asked to. She has the exact same problem with the MC, so when she finds out about the issue, her eyes widen with shock and realization. She leans in until her forehead rests on the MC's shoulder and murmurs, "I will believe that you always, happily, want to meet my needs if you believe the same of me..."

Manerkol would materialize right next to the MC in a breath's span, sliding down next to them and dragging them onto his lap, their back to his front. Then, he'd growl in the MC's ear, his voice husky and deep as he orders them. "Show me." He uses his teeth, lips, tongue, and hands to caress and coax until the MC loses control. Then, afterwards, once the real issue is revealed, Manerkol frowns and then says, "I would give my very soul to you if you only asked. I want you, everything about you, to the point of insanity. Do not ever ask me for anything. Simply claim it."

Zach would silently make their way to the MC, draw no attention to themselves, and watch them quietly until they climax. Then, once the MC is done, they clear their throat and make eye contact before licking their lips, pushing away from the wall they were leaning against and rumble, "My turn to make you scream now." Once everything is said and done, they hold the MC close and apologize for not tending to them sooner. "The day will come when I've proven it enough to you that I am always here, here for you and anything you need, that you won't even give it a second thought before asking for what you want. I look forward to that day."

Cy would never have that happen tbh. They are a HIGHLY sexual person, and the MC just breathing is enough to set them off. No matter how hectic things get, Cy will MAKE time for it. The MC is not getting away without at least a couple of orgasms per day. Plus, they are always ready to give the MC anything they want, so they'd be SUPER confused if the MC tried to hold back about telling them what they need. If something like that comes to light, Cy would frown disapprovingly, grab their chin, and tell the MC, "Songbird, everything that makes you you is mine. You belong to me. Your fear, your joy, your needs, your doubts. I want all of it. Do not deny me a single thing about you. I will always have it in the end."