#and with jim and spock he’s like you guys are fucking stupid

[adoctornotatumbl-r]

obsessed with how tos bones is canonically almost always a really sweet and affectionate guy to anyone who isn’t jim or spock

[t0ast-ghost]

Episode 17 (The Galileo Seven):

- I’ve heard good things about this one… (edit: understatement of the fuckin year)

- pretty green space thing

- oh so the shuttlecraft is called Galileo.. lemme guess there’s gonna be seven people on board

- NEW PARIS??? Someone made it again? Does it have the crypts? Does it have someone to hate the Eiffel Tower like Guy de Maupassant? Does it even have an Effiel tower?

- oh that’s fuckin neat. I love the shuttlecraft lifting out of the ship

- I love the carpet flooring on the shuttlecraft

- “Doctor McCoy a reading on the atmosphere, please” HE TOUCHES HIS SHOULDER OMG

- say what you will, that shuttlecraft door opening and closing is cool as fuck

- A Bones sitting normally in chairs compilation would be extremely short

- WhY ARE THEY BICKERING RiGHt NOw?!! STOP FLIRTING

- "we'll have to lighten our load by three hundred pounds" "approximately three men" t'would be a shame if something were to... happen...

- “if any minor damage was overlooked it was when they put his head together.” “Not his head, Mr. Boma. His heart… His heart” this is said with such longing and sadness like, what.

- THAT is a comically large spear

- one down… two to go..

- “Mr. Spock, something’s happening outside” Spock immediately goes to help, he cares in his own way

- being reminded how immaculate Spock and McCoy’s eyebrows are

- “Yes, I know, but fortunately I’m giving the orders” Spock is so real for this

- “and just where are you going?”(I’m worried what you’re going to go do without your phaser)“I have a certain scientific curiosity about what’s happened of Mr. Gaetano. Return to the ship please.” (I need to find out if Gaetano is alive. Please stay safe back at the ship)

- aww he’s taking the body back because he knows it’s important to the crew (he cares in his own way… again!)

- NOW IS NOT THE TIME TO BE CONFUSED YOU ARE BEING ATTACKED “a little less analysis and a little more action” McCoy is RIGHT

- “Mr. Spock, remind me to tell you that I’m sick and tired of your logic.” “That is a most illogical attitude.” They love each other. They love each other so much.

- no but seriously, McCoy thinks it’s stupid that Spock’s logic would dictate that he would have to leave Spock behind. Where Spock would rather they have a better chance at getting back and thinks leaving him was the most logical

- “Did I [say that]? I must have been mistaken.” “Well at least I’ll live long enough to hear that.” Not the time nor place gentlemen

- “it may be the last action you’ll ever take, Mr. Spock… but it was all human.” “Totally illogical.” “That’s what I mean.” In what could have been his last moments Bones decides to antagonize/reassure Spock

- WHAT IS BONES WHISPERING IN JIM’S EAR

- I- this scene, right here

- Kirk leans in while smiling and says, “Mr. Spock, you’re a stubborn man.” “Yes, sir”

New favourite episode.

Master list link

[fexalted]

watching tos for the first time since like, roughly 2012/13-ish? i don't remember what year it was, or why i only got thru most of season 1 before stopping

it's been fun to refresh my swiss cheesed memory with this tho so here's a semi-liveblog of the first 10 eps that i watched over the past couple weeks

1x01 - the man trap

things i remembered beforehand:

salt monster

"plum" uwu

that gay little run and crawl jim does when he's taking cover (it fills me with such delight)

things i did not remember:

how many people died, good god man it's only the first episode

1x02 - charlie x

things i remembered:

jim's bright red exercise pants

that stupid fucking face charlie makes when he uses his powers

not liking this ep at all when i first watched it, possibly due to me being around the same age as charlie at the time

additional thoughts: i enjoyed it more this time and felt more sympathetic for charlie. poor kid needed some parents, and also, like, a hug

1x03 - where no man has gone before

things i remembered:

bones isn't in it :'( (bored) (sad) (missing my bestie)

"James R Kirk"

that post i saw on here recently about how their contacts were made of glass

the only thing i could think about while watching:

their contacts

were made

of GLASS

(yes i understand this was how contacts were made back then. still freaked out by the concept of people putting glass in their eyes on purpose)

1x04 - the naked time

things i remembered:

sweat disease

sulu fencing

oh kathleen

"ONE-MORE-TIME!!"

"love mankind"

spock breakdown (extremely uncomfortable to watch)

bones casually ripping jim's shirt sleeve to jab him in the arm (extremely hilarious every time i think about it)

did not remember:

anything about them almost crashing into a planet lol

jim's little monologue when he gets infected (lmao)

time warp???

additional thoughts: hey remember when they reused this plot in tng and tasha and data fucked (<- literally the only thing i can remember about it) ((edit from future fex: i rewatched that ep. it was wild. tos did it better tho))

1x05 - the enemy within

things i remembered:

unicorn dog :)

evil kirk and poor little meow meow kirk

"I'M CAPTAIN KIRK!!!"

things not remembered:

dog dies :(

evil kirk's killer eyeliner

additional thoughts: say what you will about shatner / his acting but this ep is Peak shatner performance and a lot of fun to watch. he put his whole pussy into it, as the kids say these days

1x06 - mudd's women

things remembered:

could not forget harry mudd if i tried

the women are color coded like the powerpuff girls lol

they're also like, on some kind of drug that keeps them looking young or something

cool costumes tho

i don't have much to say about this one lol, harry's a fun character but the rest of the ep wasn't super interesting to me. did finally learn how to pronounce "ophiuchus" tho so i'll thank it for that

1x07 - what are little girls made of

things remembered:

is this the penis rock episode (it is)

uhhh i think kirk gets put into some kind of spinny machine that makes androids (he does)

more cool costumes (debatable)

things i find funny:

the number of planets we've encountered so far that are populated by like. 2-4 people

the way ruk (the big guy) just picks up and throws kirk like he weighs nothing

so much buildup with kirk and the penis rock and he doesn't even get to hit ruk over the head with it smh

also not a funny moment but i liked the way kirk was able to get a message to spock thru the android kirk, v clever

wait i just realized bones wasn't in this ep either. deducting 1/4 of a star from my mental rating bc i missed him (but apparently not that much)

1x08 - miri

remembered:

planet of children (bc everyone else died of terminal puberty)

"no blah blah blah!"

bones tests his newly discovered, untested cure on himself, in true mad scientist fashion (also spones moment <3)

saw this ep on a "what's your fave 'bad' episode" poll here recently and i can't remember if i thought it was good or bad when i first watched it lol

forgot:

another earth?? there's just a second, identical earth floating around out there?? and (of course) they don't mention it at all for the rest of the episode

300 year old children

oh these kids are so much more annoying than i remembered, however i may just be biased bc i don't like kids shfkshfk

1x09 - dagger of the mind

remember:

absolutely nothing! oh boy!

thoughts:

wow this ep is fucked up!

okay actually i don't think i've seen this one at all before?

usually there'll be moments that jog my memory but the only thing even slightly familiar to me was kirk going "helen don't go!" while in the neutralizer chair, but i could've just seen a clip/gif of it before

i remember skipping episodes in season 1 (i was impatient and wanted to get to city on the edge of forever) but i thought i'd at least made it to halfway thru the season before skipping any

anyway did i mention this ep is fucked up? (star trek really does love to drop an absolutely haunting 50 minutes of television on you and then never address it again, i understand this now. roll credits!)

1x10 - the corbomite maneuver

remember:

uhh

there's a thing out there

it's in the way

preventing them from boldly going, even

looks like an old windows screensaver

i might've skipped this ep too now that i think about it

thoughts:

cute mckirk moment in sickbay :3

i love that this cube has its own theme music whenever its on screen

oh shit it's the sequel to cube: orb

jesus christ that's a big orb

man they really said "okay we've got 3 music tracks and we're gonna get our money's worth out of them"

i gotta say this ep slaps tbh—WAIT HE'S A BABY???

LITTLE BABY MAN

LMAOOOOO

honestly great episode tho i'll stand by that

[thegeminisage]

it's star trek update time!! last night* we watched tng's "gambit part i" and ds9's "invasive procedures." *earlier tonight but i am typing this at stupid o clock and letting it post itself tmrw.

gambit part i (tng):

had high hopes for this one initially. i love it when they put on civilian clothes, for starters, and also we got a little riker e worf e deanna before we ALSO got e beverly and the joke about her 1. being riker's sister (shoutout to that trill episode where she wouldn't fuck him at first because she said he was like a brother to her) and 2. picard getting her knocked up BECAUSE LIKE HE ABSOLUTELY DID KNOCK HER UP WITH WESLEY CRUSHER THEIR AFFAIR BABY really sent me to the fucking stratosphere. tng's been pretty watchable lately so i was giving it quite a lot of benefit of the doubt

unfortunately, we went directly from that to riker yelling at deanna for no reason...i always really disliked riker's relationship with picard. he's so weirdly hyperprotective of him in a way beyond his job duties. it doesn't feel like coworkers or friends or equals or even like it's supposed to be secretly shippy the way spock and jim were - riker is too overprotective for it to even be likened to a lover's realtionship. it also doesn't even really feel fatherly, like picard is stepping in for riker's shitheel of a dad. actually, riker almost acts like picard is HIS child. it is SOOO fucking unsexy and uncomfortable

physically grinding my teeth once picard DID show back up because with ANY other two characters this would have been fantastic. riker and worf. riker and deanna. riker and literally anyone because he has that kind of chemistry and down to clown attitude. even picard could have been ok paired with beverly or data or someone he actually works well with. it could have been ANYONE. even two people who don't talk to each other much like geordi and deanna or whatever. instead we got these like truly fantastic moments of noverbal communication and mutual scheming and pretending not to know each other while actually knowing each other sooo well and it was with the LEAST fun combination of characters out of the ENTIRE cast!!!!!!! augh

AND!!!! IT'S ALL FOR STUPID ARCHAEOLOGYYYY

PICARD GET A LIFE CHALLENGE!!!!!!!!!!

it's not even that the writing was bad. i'm annoyed because the writing in this section was GOOD. but picard and riker's relationship is bad, so it soured the whole experience

anyway, i think riker should have battled his eyelashes at that wrinkled little alien when he wanted info from him. instead of whatever that was. also he was making REALLY good faces when they were torturing him with that neck thing and he was on the floor. that's a rage glare. a kill you look. mwah

oh side bar i physically could not look at geordi this episode. so that's been fun.

invasive procedures (ds9):

oh girl we are In It

firstly, odo's little bucket prison. that was SO sad because he doesn't goop in front of people. i felt horrible for him. my poor best friend odo

i really like how ambiguous it is like how much of jadzia dax is jadzia and how much is dax. does dax have his? her? their? own personality and all, or are they just the sum of their past hosts? when dax was inside that other guy, did part of them want to get out and go back to jadzia where they chose to be to begin with? to save jadzia's life? or do they not care? is dax themself not super sentient unless they're inside a host and then that host's personality is sort of dominant? so many questions.........trills are fascinating conceptually bc there's no clear definitive answers, so i was really dismayed that dax was easily the most boring character in season 1. but now!!!!!

ok, before we get into it, i have to say also, the cast rallying around dax/jadzia...really really good. actually, all their interactions with one another were spot on. bashir being SO NICEYS with odo's little bucket prison and then quark also springing odo from the bucket prison, bashir absolutely chomping at the BIT to treat o'brien's phaser wound, kira threatening quark on jadzia's behalf, quark tackling that klingon to save her/redeem himself. oh yeah and kira saying with her Whole chest that if odo's free there's no way any of the bad guys are escaping the station. my future otp......................

speaking of quark i did say the worst thing in the world to catherine while we were watching which is "this is what he sounds like when odo's plowing him" and the longer the noises went on the worse it became for her and the funnier it became for me. cathy when you read this you have my apologies

i did feel a little weird about julian stroking jadzia's face when she was naked and vulnerable recovering from worm surgery (the worm surgery was GREAT by the way) when she has explicitly and repeatedly turned him down in the past, but i'm giving it a reluctant benefit-of-the-doubt pass on account of he felt terrible about what he'd had to do and probably just wanted to comfort her, and considering the state she was in there weren't very many other ways/places to touch her except her head and maybe her hands. also i forgive him because him talking back to that klingon was sooo fun

i would have also liked for this episode to push on the insanity of being bonded to a symbiont and then being forcibly unbonded. like its just now striking me that curzon died alone. beverly's little trill boyfriend died alone. jadzia would have died alone, too. and the dax part just has to move on. like that's crazy. does dax grieve for past hosts? or would it be like grieving for yourself? what is it like seeing dax inside another body when they've been inside yours for almost your entire adult life?

but actually what i really wanted was to see this bad guy's insanity reflected in jadzia. instead of saying oh man i feel so alone she could have been like. more of a wreck. and conversely, he would have been that same kind of wreck after dax got taken back out of him. that would have been cool.

i would also like to know how the dax part felt about forcibly being put in another body they never wanted to be. are they fighting with themselves? himself? the host wants things to stay as they are but dax doesn't, so what happens? does it not feel like an awful violation? i could have used 5 more minutes of that episode

also. sorry. dax and sisko................"i wish we could have made it three" it's, sorry, toph and aang and korra core. do you think friendships can last more than one lifetime...........

icing on the cake was that he was so mad at the bad guy whose name i keep forgetting that he was like DONT CALL ME BENJAMIN and shot his ass stone cold. bc that was better than letting his friend be taken by this asshole lol

anyway, my final dax question is when does her hair get smaller. her head is such a weird shape. is she wearing a wig, is that's what's happening? and the rest of her head just looks weirdly big because of it? it's making me crazy.

NEXT TIME: tng's "gambit part ii" and ds9's "cardassians" AND I LOOKED IT UP AND GARAK IS FINALLY BACK!!!!!!! i can't wait....................

[quarktrinity]

quark watches star trek season 2 episode 19 (CW: firearms)

mccoy is a fucking nerd. lets look for Organisms

"quite like earth" looks like it too. wonder where they filmed it.

kirk is appalled to see that the aliens have reached the stone age

the fact that this episode is called "a private little war" makes me think that this gonna be about the cold war so heres my prediction: the soviets- i mean the klingons upgraded this alien society to be good at fighting and now the united states- i mean federation has to fight them and make them be nice

yeah kirk dont shoot the natives that have literally done nothing to you

/he throws a rock instead/

why do these guys have guns. who gave them guns. who am i kidding it was the klingons

obvious stage fall is hilarious

spock gets shot and all kirk can worry about is his space gun

aight bye

"his heart is where his liver should be" should be?? should be??? stfu mccoy

the klingons? noooo waaaayyyyyy

kirk is worried about his space boyfriend

whaaaaat you mean the klingons have interfered with a foreign society as a proxy to harm the federation without technically breaking their peace treaty?

cmon guys havent you learned the show structure by now. his intuition is always right all the time

"he'll live or die, jim" yes that is often the case

this is the kirk has anxiety episode

i want to gnaw on kirks neck like a dog toy. in like a sexy way

kirk? violating orders? wow

kirks got his tits AND his guns out. thank u star trek i love u star trek

kirk baps mccoys boob

space yeti jumpscare

space yeti evidently wants to gnaw on kirks neck as much as i do

its dead now

kirks been poisoned :(

"kirk is right about the people here" woah kirk was right? so weird how kirk was right

rare episode in which mccoy is the mvp

sexy murderess alien

this girl is brainwashing this dude into being horny for her i guess

kirks under a massive furry blanket. i want to be him rn. not poisoned and dying but under a massive furry blanket

hes so cozy

is this girl gonna brainwash kirk

were sexualizing kirk again

/slaps your boob/

this is straighter than straight sex

oh my god this is the horniest healing session ive ever fucking seen

kirks fine now

mccoy strokes kirks boob

"he is mine now" woah shes evil? crazy

through alien magic we can make malewives of you all

motif of domination in this episode. even in the b plot. normal tv show

this episode is extremely horny and extremely about the cold war in ways that are completely unrelated

"killing is stupid and useless" - dr leanord mccoy

metal gear solid ass stealth sequence

wow this is just like minecraft

pesky space ringtone, giving away our location

uh oh. methinks they just broke the treaty

they werent lying this war sure is private and little

spock demands nurse lady to hit him. weve covered 3/4 of the letters in bdsm. all thats left is bondage.

were teaching the aliens to shoot guns so they can fight the klingon-upgraded aliens. this could not be more about the cold war

THIS ISNT EVEN A METAPHOR ANYMORE KIRK IS DIRECTLY COMPARING THIS TO THE COLD WAR

i know that kirk is brainwashed because hes advocating for war

this isnt the first time kirks been brainwashed into being horny and im certain it wont be the last

dont break the bro code kirk

kirk broke the bro code :/

space yeti... 2!!

Helpless Woman Flailing

she took kirks space gun and shes not even using it right

star trek be normal about women please

Were All Fighting Now

literally just this image

lot of brown in this episode. pretty boring visual design

so. are you deciding not to arm the space proxy war, or are you just sad that you have to

thats it??? thats the episode?????

what was this even trying to say. i know its propaganda but what KIND

[barebcnes]

@paramounticebound asked: [ GENTLE ]: having found the receiver sender in an emotionally compromised position, the sender receiver closes the door and approaches them carefully, gently saying "hey…" to try and get them to communicate what has upset them. (( or reversed if you want! ))

To say that seeing Khan cry, of all people Leonard has met so far, is thoroughly shaking him up quite a bit... might be an understatement.

That's probably the case because of different reasons: First, Khan is... well, Khan. He is perhaps the most strongest human (granted, enhanced human) he's ever met in his entire life (or heard of, for the matter), not only phyiscally but mentally as well, if one takes into consideration what he's gone through during his existence. To Leonard, he comes across as quite collected, despite the weight that rests on his shoulders - and hadn't Jim told him about that one time the Augment had cried back at the brig, the Doctor would boldly assume that crying is simply not an action that's existing within his genes, as if a code is missing for that emotion to portray itself.

Second: ... Well, actually... Bones has started to like him, somewhere along the last couple of weeks. Quite a lot, which he knows might be a questionable thing to experience given everything that has happened just a short while ago - but dammit, he's just human himself, and the longer Leonard had mused about what exactly had gone wrong there (not only regarding the whole getting-killed thing, but also the fact that Khan must have gone through so much mental trauma to even end up where he was once Jim, Spock and Uhura had captured him back on Kronos...) the more he'd found himself realizing that basically everything had gone to shit in the most horrific shit ways. Things could - and should - have been handled better from all sides, ended up in a situation that has, effectively so, caused even more harm, with Kirk dying (and being resurrected, thank god) and Khan... well. Having gotten turned into another popsicle before Leonard had been the one to thaw him again.

And now here the man is, the one who has probably experienced so much more pain than any of them could ever imagine - than Bones could ever imagine, for the matter. He barely makes any noises but fuck, Leonard just knows that guy is crying the seconds he spots him standing in that dark corner of the room, back turned toward the door, hiding his front from curious gazes with a hand up on his face---

"...Hey.", is what he decides to say, quietly so, because he's a Doctor, he knows he shouldn't sneak up on someone who's having a hard time. McCoy closes the door behind himself, makes sure no one is entering, before he takes a soft breath and walks further into what has been Khan's home for the last week or such; A glorified prison cell that's made to look like a small one-room-apartment but doesn't allow him to leave. Granted, Khan at least is allowed to own some furniture here - like a bed, a table, chairs, a couch, even a TV for entertainment purposes.

That's bullshit, all of it is, in Leonard's opinion. But he's got nothing to say on the matter, not for the duration of however long all of this might take. So he accepts it, because what else is he supposed to do?

Part of the Doctor wants to ask that one, stupid question everyone does: You okay? But seriously, that's an idiot-thing to ask, especially when seeing someone going through something here, emotionally compromised in any shape or form.

... He's actually here to take a scan, another blood sample, such things. Looks like he might be here for something else.

"---You want to talk?"

The medical supplies Leonard had been holding onto are placed down onto said table, not needed for now. Perhaps later - but whatever Khan goes through right now is more important.

Fuck, it hurts to see him like this. A lot, actually.

[rronanllynch]

Catspaw

SCOTTY SND SULU ARE MIA SO KIRK BRINGS McCoy and Spock with him like sure let’s bring the top five officers down to die!

CHEKOVS WIG I WASNT PREPARED I read his Wikipedia article it’s so bad Walter Koenig I’m so sorry

My kingdom for some subtitles on this episode for these Macbeth witches vibes

Kirk: Spock, comment?

Spock: very bad poetry captain.

Bones: 🤨

Kirk: a more useful comment, Spock.

Rip Leonard McCoy you would have loved being able to look into the camera like you’re on the office and or doing a confessional

Bones: looks into the camera 🤨

Bones, confessional: “bad poetry” he’s so fucking pretentious just say you don’t know, Spock!

Thinking about bill Leonard and deforest doing one of those modern autocomplete interviews or the like twitter ones the 21st century did eat with stupid interview formulas

Spock’s deep sigh when the door slams behind them that’s so funny he’s like I hate this fucking job

I’m obsessed with this cat actor (cactor)

The way they’re clearly just standing and not like being strained from being hung up

I can’t believe Scotty’s actor isn’t actually Scottish

The way this cat is clearly comfortable and chill and they’re like let’s pipe in some angry meowing

“You are the …. Different one….mr Spock” *calls him a slur*

Did they lose a hair stylist for Kirk or what

Not the eyeliner on Chekov

Spock calling Kirk jim while they’re worrying about bones….

Spock: they must be….totally alien…. Yeah like everything else you’ve encountered????

KIRKS LITTLE “oh…bones……”

Honestly…I support this woman’s wrongs. God forbid women do anything! (Torture brainwash and turn into a cat)

Kirks like “well if I have to seduce for the good of the enterprise!”

NOT THE ILLUSION OF THR CAT BSING GIANT

Kirk: at least we found them

Spock; fortuitous captain

Omg the way they were probably dangling a toy in front of the cat

WHAT???? THWYRE LITTLE SHRIMP GUYS???? That’s so funny I’m screaming

Their steaming bodies 😭😭😭😭

Deeply unserious show strikes once again!!!!

[obscure-reference-girl]

Masks &  Misunderstandings Chapter 3

Pairing: Pavel Chekov/Leonard McCoy

Warnings: Swearing (because it’s Bones),

Word Count: 2558

Summary: Leonard thought that a nightclub where you had to wear a mask was  idiotic, but he humored Jim and accompanied him to the club during shore  leave anyway. After Jim fucked off into the crowd of dancing bodies  without so much as a ‘never you mind’, Leonard went looking for him and  found something unexpected. Meet unexpected: sexy, young, blonde...and  if he reminded him a bit too much of a certain Russian navigator he  wasn't going to linger on that thought.

Chapter Summary: Leonard pines over Pavel, wonders why Sulu is pissed at him (golly gee I wonder), and gets an unexpected call from home.

Author’s note: Thank you so much to everyone joining me on this wild ride!

AO3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/45899593/chapters/115963387

The day before his two-week STI test Leonard woke in a cold-sweat with an erection. He had spent the previous two weeks resolutely trying NOT to think about the night at the club. He was managing fairly well if you didn’t include when he was sickbay worrying about his two-week STI test…and whenever Jim was around pestering him, trying to figure out who the mystery man could have been…or whenever he woke up with a raging erection. In other words, he was failing miserably. To make matters worse, the mystery man in his dreams now often bore the face of a certain navigator. This only added to the guilt he felt over the fact that he was masturbating more than he had since high school. Jim wasn’t helping either.

When Jim wasn’t bothering Leonard, he was teasing Chekov about his own shore leave escapade making the young man blush the most enticing shade of pink. A flush that only served to remind Leonard of the flush of pale skin beneath his hands as we worked them over the mystery man’s body. Christine was obviously trying to not say anything, but she kept giving Leonard meaningful glances that obviously meant she thought he needed to talk. To top it off, Spock kept shooting him knowing looks that left no doubt in his mind that Jim had told the hobgoblin everything. Jim just couldn’t resist spilling his guts to his first officer regardless of whether he was even asked.

Leonard had also noticed that Lieutenant Sulu seemed to be avoiding him. They weren’t particularly close, but they has always been friendly. He couldn’t remember doing anything to piss-off the pilot, but Sulu kept glaring at Leonard from across the rec room. A few days previously he had even gotten up and left the table he was sitting at in the mess when Leonard sat down to join him. He made some excuse about being done and needing to get back to the bridge, but he had hardly started on his chicken marsala. Len would ask Chekov what was going on with his best friend if it weren’t for the fact that Leonard couldn’t look at him without thinking about the mystery man and how amazing the sex had been.

It really had been amazing too, and yet it had still left Leonard wanting more. He wanted to know what the man’s mouth tasted like, if he had freckles on his nose and cheekbones to match the ones dusting his shoulders. And Fuck, it wasn’t just the physical side of things either. He wanted to know what the man’s laugh sounded like, what his expression would be when Leonard learned exactly where to touch and caress to draw out those delectable gasps. There was a reason that Leonard didn’t do casual sex, he was a god-damned romantic. Logically, he knew that there was no reason for him to be pining over someone he didn’t even know. For all he knew, he would hate the guy if he actually got to know him. He was a doctor. He knew that what felt like a genuine connection was just dopamine and oxytocin and his neurotransmitters being stupid. Yet, he couldn’t help but wonder what it would have been like if he had done things differently, if he hadn’t seemed to lose all sense. What could have happened? God damn it. He felt ridiculous.

***

Leonard had never quite realized just how much time he spent around Pavel Chekov. You wouldn’t think that a thirty-three year old doctor and a nineteen year old bridge officer would find themselves thrown together particularly often, but it seemed like he couldn’t get away from him. To be fair, Leonard imagined that he spent more time on the bridge than the average CMO. The alpha shift bridge crew was heinously accident prone. He was forever reminding Jim and Spock that they did, in fact, need to eat. And Jim liked to have Len deliver his daily briefings while he sat at command as an excuse to see his best friend. As chief navigator Chekov was included in all senior officer briefings and it seemed like in his off time Chekov was always in medbay doing some equipment update that he’d dreamed up with Scotty. It also didn’t help that they were friends, or at least shared a group of friends. Len always found himself sitting next to Chekov at meals with the other alpha shift crew or sitting across from him at the card table in the rec room - Chekov was shockingly good at Texas hold ‘em and damn if Leonard didn’t find that attractive.

Leonard found himself listening to Chekov babble on about warp cores, dwarf stars, and constellations, things that normally held no interest for Len, but he was suddenly fascinated by whenever it was Chekov explaining it. Similarly, Chekov obliged him by listening to Len carry on about the latest developments in vaccine design and organ regeneration. The kid may not have been a medical officer, but he was a genius. Of course, Jim was also a genius, but he didn’t care a whit about medicine.

The real problem wasn’t that Chekov’s presence had Leonard’s mind in a tail spin of flashbacks to the best sex of his life. Len was learning to live with that. The real problem was that Leonard found himself enjoying spending time with Chekov a little too much.

***

After work, Leonard tried to beg off socialization and escape to his room, but somehow found himself in the rec room playing cards with Scotty, Sulu, and Uhura while Jim and Chekov took turns playing chess with Spock. He was trying to focus on his hand and not the way Pavel’s thumb was pressed against his pillowy lower lip as he chewed on the edge of the nail. Len was about to see Sulu’s call when the communications panel on the wall behind him beeped. He pressed the button and was greeted by the voice of ensign Kelly. Kelly was Uhura’s communications protégé and apparently currently stationed at the comms.

“Hi Dr. McCoy, sorry to interrupt. The computer said you were in the rec room,” Kelly said.

“It’s fine Kelly. What is it?”

“Communication from earth for you sir. Origin Atlanta, Georgia.” Leonard felt his breath leave his lungs. That could only mean one thing, a communication from his parents and daughter. He wasn’t expecting a call which meant that his mind instantly started spinning with all of the injuries his daughter Joanna could have sustained at the farm or on the playground at school.

“Don’t worry sir, it says non-emergent,” Kelly added and Len felt his chest relax. Joanna was his entire world. When his ex-wife Jocelyn left him, she took every last damn thing Leonard had to his name, but she hadn’t gotten Joanna. That was the one thing he had fought tooth and nail over. Though to be honest, Jocelyn had never been the maternal type. She remained in Joanna’s life in a transient capacity, but mostly she was too busy traveling and making her weird-ass art out of interplanetary metals. She certainly had the money to do whatever she damn well pleased with what she had sold their house for. Len and Joanna had moved home to his parent’s farm, but he hadn’t handled being the divorced loser who had to move home very well. He had been drinking too much and decided that Joanna deserved better so he said fuck it and enlisted in Starfleet.

Joanna had lived with her grandparents since Leonard joined up. It had been easier when he was at the academy. He had been able to see her most weekends and didn’t have to miss any school plays or daddy-daughter dances. Things had been considerably more difficult since the Nerada incident and joining the crew of the Enterprise. He saved his leave for whenever they were close enough to earth to make it down to visit her. They also had a standing weekly call during which they ate dinner as a family and Joanna would update him on school, her horse, and any little thing that came to mind. He soaked up every detail, nothing too small or mundane.

           “Should I put it through to the rec room view screen Sir?” Kelly asked. Obviously Leonard had hesitated a little too long, lost in thought.

           “Sure thing.” He said. “Thanks Kelly.”

          Leonard swung chair around fully so that he was seated right in front of the viewscreen and pressed a few buttons to accept the transmission. His parents swam into focus on the screen and he was greeted by his father’s crinkly eyes and his mother’s warm smile.

“Hey Len!” His dad greeted. “I know you and Jo have a call scheduled in a few days, but she just couldn’t wait to tell you-“ He was interrupted by Joanna bouncing onto the screen.

“Hi Daddy,” She exclaimed. Her infectious smile made Len forget about all of his troubles. “I won first place in the science fair!”

“Really, Jo? That’s amazing.” He could practically feel himself glowing with pride. “Your experiment on the effectiveness of dermal regeneration on different species must have been amazing! I knew it would be! You’re always amazing!” She blushed. “I’m glad that Pawpaw was able to get those synthetic skin polymers for you.” His father was a retired surgeon at Atlanta general and still had connections in the research department.

“Actually daddy-“ she began, biting her lip.

“Is that JoJo?” Jim asked brightly as he came to lean over Len’s shoulder.

“Uncle Jim!” She chirped. The captain had been Uncle Jim to Joanna ever since their first break at Starfleet academy when Jim had gone home to visit with Leonard. Joanna had been four years old and unbearably cute. She had ‘Uncah Jim’ wrapped around her finger in about five seconds flat. Leonard and Jocelyn had both been only children so it really was great for her to have more family.

“I was just telling Daddy that I won the science fair!” Joanna informed him.

“That’s great Jo! Hear that guys,” he asked, turning to the others, “Joanna won her science fair!”

Uhura and Sulu gave a cheer and Scotty gave an ‘O’course ya did Lassy!’ The senior crew of the enterprise had become like her extended family.

“It is Joanna?” Chekov asked brightly, sliding into the empty seat next to Leonard. Joanna’s eyes lit up.

“Guess what Pavel, guess what?” Suddenly everyone else in the room ceased to matter. Joanna adored Pavel Chekov. He was energetic and listened to her with genuine interest. She was also fascinated by his job guiding the ship.

“What,” Pavel asked eagerly.

“Our navigational chart of the Andromeda system won!”

“Your what,” Leonard asked in confusion. The last time he had spoken to Joanna he was sure she was planning on dermal regeneration.

“That’s what I was trying to tell you Daddy,” She explained, “After our last call when you had an emergency in sickbay, Pavel and I started talking about the constellations of the Andromeda system and how subspace variations affect their use in navigational charting. I really loved our idea about dermal regeneration, but I wanted to try something new so Pavel’s been helping me with my project!” Len had forgotten about that. The last time he had been talking to Joanna had also been in the rec room. She had wanted to talk with ‘Auntie ‘Hura’ for  a school report on a woman she admired so Leonard had taken the call in the rec room where they could all have a chat. He had been called to sickbay for an emergency and hadn’t been able to make it back before Joanna had been dragged off to bed by his parents. He supposed Chekov must have been there. He knew that Joanna liked Pavel, but he hadn’t realized that she had started to think of him as a part of her little Starfleet family.

“Oh, I-I didn’t realize you knew Lieutenant Chekov quite so well,” He replied dumbly.

“I’m sorry Leonard, I didn’t think to tell you,” Chekov whispered to Len.

“No, no it’s fine,” He said, “I’m just surprised. But that’s great!”

Honestly he wasn’t entirely sure how he felt about Chekov becoming more entwined with his family. Of course there was a large part of him that loved it, went all warm and gooey at the thought. But then there was the other part of him that could only think about how much more difficult it would be to ignore his feelings for the younger man.

“Pavel has been wonderful helping Joanna,” Leonard’s mom joined in. Of course he was. Pavel was wonderful with everything. The fact that he was so good with Joanna only made Len fall a little deeper.

“The judges were really impressed with the addition of the sub-space oscillations to the vector equation,” Joanna continued explaining. Leonard just smiled and shook his head in defeat. He was smart of course, but his girl had a mind for physics and space science that she certainly didn’t get from him. It was a good thing that she had Uncle Jim-and apparently Chekov-to help her in that regard.

“Of course they were Joanna,” Pavel exclaimed, “Your ideas were brilliant.” Joanna beamed in response. God Leonard hoped she wasn’t developing a crush on Chekov. That was the last thing he needed. ‘No honey I don’t think that Pavel should be your boyfriend. I was thinking more like your stepfather,’ was not a conversation he ever wanted to have. He took a deep breath and reminded himself that he should have a few years until he had worry about Johanna and boys before returning his attention to the conversation.

“I’m real proud of you JoJo.” Len said warmly.

“Thanks Daddy! I know that you don’t have much extra transmission time on the ship so I’ll let you go now. I just really, really wanted to tell you.”

“I’m glad you did JoJo,” He replied sincerely. “Thanks for the call Mom, Pops,” he added.

“Bye Daddy, I love you!” Joanna chirped.

“Bye sweet pea. I love you too!” He reached forward and ended the call.  Jim returned to his chess game with Spock and the rest of them returned to their cards. Chekov hadn’t moved the chair next to Len so he turned to him and quirked an eyebrow.

“You trying to get my kid interested in space?” He asked with mock disdain.

“You know she already is, Len,” Chekov said with a laugh. “You can blame that one on Jim, not me.”

“Hey, don’t go throwing me under the bus!” Jim hollered from the nearby table.

“It’s true Jim,” Leonard said. “Until ‘Uncah Jim’ came along she wanted to be a ballerina, not a damn starship captain.”

“Your girl’s got drive Len,” Sulu pointed out. “She’ll probably outrank all of us someday.”

“Thanks for helping Jo with her project Pav,” Leonard said turning to the younger man with a warm smile. He knew he looked like a damn fool, but he couldn’t help the rush of affection he felt.  He did his best to return his attention to the game at hand and continue riding the wave of happiness that had blocked out what was coming the next day.

[bcnes-archived]

McCoy makes no comment on that. That, he is guilty of, and has no intentions of stopping. Sometimes you have to hiss and spit and claw like a cat to get folks to concede to a simple examination. Like Capella IV, where they'd scorned medical intervention on principle. Irresponsible and stupid and a matter of dumb pride. That's almost what it feels like here, though it's not pride as much as apathy, a refusal to intervene in the name of life. What a goddamn waste. It's too rare and precious for this kind of fucking attitude.

"What you deserve," he echoes lowly under his breath, and shoots him a scathing look. "You got any idea how illogical it is to make a critical judgment call like that over an opinion? Leads real quick to playin' games with life like you're god, deciding who does and doesn't deserve to live. That may fly where you're from but it's sure as hell not what we do up here."

The rest of the crew could attest that this is the easiest way to get McCoy off your back. Perhaps the only way, and this man is far from the only one who's looking to stop getting badgered. The doctor seems to study something on their guest's person out of the corner of his eye, frowning and taking an additional note on his padd. Something to grill him about when all the tests come back.

"I don't know what'll get you back to your office. I'm sure it's not that simple or you'd be there already." Starfleet doesn't appreciate delays and this most certainly counts as one. But he's pretty sure this guy comes from a spacefaring planet, so he doubts the Prime Directive is at play here. Spock and Jim would know, but McCoy has been skipping the senior officers meetings on the matter, unwilling to miss his scheduled examinations on account of a problem that those two and Scotty can undoubtedly solve without him. "I don't doubt that your job is important, but so is ours. And there's a whole lot of protocol that goes along with it. I'm sure the captain's doing everything he can."

He rolls his eyes as he hears the whistle. Yeah. 'Impressive.' But, not 'impressive' enough according to the villain. If it was, then his studies would've gave him what he was looking for all that time. Maybe it's a good thing it never did give him power, though, given everything that's happened afterwards. But he - they, even - can't help but be bitter and angry about his past failures. He's just going to be powerless. For a second, his hands sparked with turbonic energy. Venomous doesn't seem to notice, though, for in the next moment, he's pulled from his thoughts by the doctor talking once more. Right. The present. This guy's so annoying...

"...I never meant to say you were a thief. Just that you'd insist, bother, and bug me about it until I cave, no matter what," he muttered, gaze lowering to the floor. "And... I... never said I wanted to die. I'm just not going to put in effort to keep myself alive if I end up in a situation where I am going to die, since it's what I deserve. So, no, I rather not help you." He pauses, then rubs a hand over his face. Too tired for this... nothing fun is even going on... when can he go home? "...But, at this point, the sooner you quit bothering me about anything, the better. So do what you want. I don't care. As long as it gets me back to my office so I can get back to work, as quickly as possible." Boring... dull... office work... Maybe his lab would be better, actually... If he threatens this guy, would he get locked up? Prison's like an escape room. That could be fun... for a few minutes. Guess it'd be something...

[worfs-fabulous-hair]

It's time for the famed episodes I've heard alot about and to meet my favorite boy!

Series I'm currently on : the original series

Episodes watched: 02X01-02X02

Episode names:

Amok Time

Who Mourns for Adonais

Thoughts:

Amok Time

Ok so right off the bat they get into the fact that Spock's been acting strange , not eating , ect.

Chapel coming in with the plumeek soup ( please I don't know how to spell it it's a made up soup )

I wonder who had to throw that soup across the hall seems fun

Also it's kinda brushed over they Spock threatened to snap bones' neck and McCoy seems very amused by this threat

Screams at you like it's a violent threat (and by all means might be ) " I'M NOT FEELING WELL AND I WANT TO GO HOME"

Slightly new intro , this is the intro that I'm used to from childhood

He's not even getting reprimanded for being violent towards chapel he's just like " you never take a break , that's how I know something is wrong " , really Jim that's how you know something is wrong ?

Also the comment about how a woman shouldn't bring a man who isn't her husband lunch and that is inherently sexual somehow is just brushed over like it's nothing the 60s were wild

Why does he start shaking so bad the second that Jim leaves ?

CHEKOV !!!!

also the event that they were supposed to go to and took a detour from is now a week earlier then before

They decided to not detour to Vulcan

Spock changed the course back to Vulcan

Spock is yelling at Kirk to lock him in his room

Spock's getting a physical

Jim's gonna get the pon farr talk

" Spock's not gonna tell anyone what's going on not even you" " I'll make him tell me "

" the birds and the bees are not vulcans captain "

" haven't you wondered , how vulcans choose their mates ?" Jim looks so much like he's trying hide excitement and curiosity at that , like shatner played this man to be so gay

These little tidbits between Sulu and Chekov about the course constantly being changed is so cute

Kirk is really risking everything to keep Spock alive

Chapel's happy little smile when Kirk says they're going to Vulcan

" your face is wet"

Spock is flirting with chapel

Spock asking Kirk and McCoy to be his best men at his wedding

T'PRING

Imagine working with this guy for like years you consider him a close friend and then one day there is like video call in the middle of the conference and this woman comes on the screen and says hey to the guy and you ask him who that was and he just goes "my wife " like you should know that already but he's never once told you he has a wife like this shit is so wild

Marriage or battle to the death

All of those fucking bells

I love Vulcan wedding fashion all of the metallic clothing

T'pao talks like and looks like my grandma

Damn imagine showing up to a wedding and the bride rejects the groom before it starts and tells him he has to fight someone to the death or he'll die

Spock sounds like an edgy teenager while he's saying that Kirk doesn't know what he is getting into

Why is stonn always making that face it makes him look so stupid

Weapons wrapped in purple velvet

" oh so no one was gonna tell me this was a fight to the death ?? Until I already accepted that bullshit "

Oof the way he fell on his arm I know that's gotta hurt

Pulled that medicine out of now where

Kirk being handed different weapons and having the face of what the fuck is this , what is this for ?? Is the best

Kirk's dead

" tell Chekov to find the nearest prison so I can turn myself in "

Man t'pring is kind of a bitch

" I shall do neither "

Jim's alive

Look at that smile

And then he immediately pretends like he's not happy and excited

Ay ! T'pao coming through with helping the enterprise crew from being reprimanded by star fleet for going to Vulcan

" I don't know what your talking about I didn't have an emotional reaction when I thought I'd killed the captain not at all "

Who Mourns for Adonais?

Scotty's got a crush

Hey it's crazy hand and master hand

The giant hand has grabbed the enterprise

Does the hand belong to a giant phantom space baby ?

What's the name of that movie where they all have the flower crowns ?? Is it midsommer?

This floating head entity looks like he's from that

He's gonna crush the ship because they wouldn't listen to his bible reading

" you and your officers are invited but not the one with the pointy ears he looks like this one guy that I used to know who was sooo boring "

Man this lady hasn't slept in over 24 hours and they brought her along for this shit , I'd be so peeved off

" I am Apollo " " and everyone in Russia thinks I'm incredibly attractive , yeah sure bud"

" Chekov please not right now "

"earth women mmmmm"

Just , just this :

He's also not letting them leave because he wants to be worshipped

Apollo is doing some Cheshire cat shit

He's also basically throwing a temper tantrum

Chekov and Scotty are ready to shoot a bitch but can't

Damn Scotty just got back handed so hard he was sent flying

Apollo kidnapped Caroline

Wait how do they know that he's Apollo on the ship he only said so to the landing party after they got there

So according to this dude all of the gods left the planet rather through death or in search of new worshippers

" Spock's contaminating this boy jim "

Apollo shocked Scotty with lightning and is force choking Kirk

" like that cat in the Russian story "

"We're gonna sacrifice one of us so the just of us can jump on the off handed chance he doesn't disappear "

The plan has failed because Caroline jumped between them and basically did what those high school couples do when the boy gets into a fight and then the girl jumps in the middle and holds his face going " this isn't you babe , you don't need to do this , look at me babe I'm all you need "

" how old are you ? " " I'm 22 sir" " then I'll handle it by myself "

Like what does that have to do with anything

At this point the lieutenant probably thinks this is all a dream she hasn't slept in over 24 hours and hasn't had any coffee either

" your a human you need to help out your fellow human "

Why do they keep having the women of the ship falling in love with a very obviously terrible person they have known for only a few hours

" Tell me more about yourself " " what more is there to tell I am Apollo " " yeah but like tell me about your childhood , your hobbies there's got to be more to you then just what your name is " " but ... I'm Apollo??"

" I've been studying you this entire time , your nothing more then a test subject" lmao get wrecked

They destroyed his shit and now he's real mad

He became so depressed from rejection that he died

I like how gods just exist in star trek like that's just a thing

[spacewizardtrek]

WARNING: This post will ruin you. Like Medusa; look at your peril.

But here is is. It’s the one you’ve all been waiting for.

Kirk bod appreciation #7: The RIDICULOUSLY BEAUTIFUL FACE. A highly technical and academic review.

This is a rather nebulous one. And not, on the face of it (pardon the pun) very philosophical, as it’s essentially about Kirk being stupidly pretty. This post probably will (it will) descend into just screaming and sobbing, but there will be, I promise, *some* meaningful insight into the meaning of ‘beauty’ and textual analysis of its role herein.

Beauty is subjective. But look at him. It’s not just being aesthetic, but it’s the *way* he’s aesthetic. Here I might repeat myself a bit, but stay with me. I may have mentioned before once hearing him described as ‘beautiful in the way women are often described as beautiful’. He is PRETTY. He is indeed often conveyed in the way the women stereotypically (not necessarily rightly) are on screen: perfect, smooth skin; soft, big eyes; luscious lips (his body is sensually curvaceous and furthermore it’s emphasised). He’s not androgynous though. He’s masculine. And yet I still sense what was meant in describing him as ‘beautiful in the way women are often described as beautiful’. He is a rather uncommon form of gender fuckery. He is a form of stereotype-subversion not commonly acknowledged. He seems to be everything at once, ALL THE GENDER; combines whichever traits he desires from those categories, and yet is undeniably a man and masculine whatever the ingredients. HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE, one might wonder. The fact of the matter is, that it IS. And it teaches us something.

The FUCK. nO. You are not allowed to be that pretty, and you are NOT allowed to look at her like that. We’re trying to have a SENSIBLE DISCUSSION here.

Sorry, that was a non-sequitur / nothing to do with what we learn by Kirk’s embodiment; I was just ambushed by my own gif. Only the control of a Vulcan. ONLY that could possibly withstand this onslaught. And even that won’t hold up forever AS WE WELL KNOW

God.

This is going well, as you can tell.

OK. So, it’s claimed he has Eyes and Stupidly Long Weakness-Inducing Eyelashes. You know, from all that fanfic that goes on about ‘big, sparkling eyes’ and him fanning his ‘long, copper eyelashes’. I mean, yeah right, tropey mc tropeface -

IT’S TRUE. HE IS LITERALLY AN ANIME PRINCESS.

There are some moments where he just BLINKS and, how to describe it...how does a BLINK have that effect. It’s NOT ALLOWED.

...I’m sorry. It IS allowed. All of it. I am not shaming you your beauty. Never change, Jim. Never.

OK. I’m ok. 3 pics down, we can get through this -

Oh you are joking. Stop.

I don’t understand how anyone can be so beautiful. Life is a lie. Reality is fake -

- you did NOT just turn your big anime eyes on Spock. You do know this is why he ran away to PURGE ALL HIS EMOTIONS?

And for that matter, you know when Kirk looks his most beautiful? Literally WHEN HE’S LOOKING AT SPOCK. Spock talks some bollocks and Kirk just sparkles like a fucking angel:

Unbelievable. But utterly undeniable.

Sigh. Moving on.

Oh - someone once suggested I talk about The Lips. Lips are so wonderful aren’t they. So many wonderful things they can do.

And Kirk’s. They’re there in every picture: perfect, rosy, soft and madness-inducing. My advice is just...don’t think about them. But since I’ve been asked to draw attention to them, well, you’ve just sealed your fate. Scroll down at your peril.

I WARNED YOU.

I am pulling NO punches.

I’ve seen this great meme going around:

Excuse me though....CUTE?

That’s the understatement of the 23rd century.

Try impossibly beautiful, mind and body: heart of solid gold, soul deep in love with you. Those eyes and all their passion burned into your memories a thousand times over, along with - maybe, suggestibly, idk I’m extrapolating from all the goddamn tension - even the one unforgettable time he laid between lily-white sheets and gave himself to you; every gift of the mind, body and soul - and your ostensibly-forced Vulcan conditioning, that completely ignored how incompatible one part of you was with it, caused so much dissonance that you thought the only possible course of action for you both to survive was to BREAK UP, tear yourself from this beauty and love and sweetness to PURGE ALL EMOTIONS because nothing, nothing equipped you for this; you were set up specifically to fail, and fail hard in the face of transcendental love and beauty by those who rejected such things and didn’t understand you and could never imagine this for you and who instead of helping your beautiful neurodivergent brain flourish taught you to repress and caused you pain and shame and Gol was so hard and Kirk was so sad, so very sad and depressed and hurt and yet he couldn’t stop loving you with a bond so strong he called to you across the stars and Gol was all for naught yet you still didn’t know how to live like this, it was torture, torture until the mind meld with the living machine flashed your BIOS and you knew, love.exe was suddenly running with no errors and he came after you and held you and you held hands and, and -

.

*sobbing*

.

just...give me a moment

.

YOU WONDER WHAT THE SUBTEXT (FRIKKIN’ MAIN TEXT) OF STAR TREK: THE MOTION PICTURE WAS ALL ABOUT???

The pain?? The angst?? The two logical entities seeking contact, love, THIS SIMPLE FEELING? That fucking moment when spock walks on the bridge and the only way he can control himself is to be SUPER Vulcan, while his love gazes at him with those EYES, fucking huge and glittering and hurt and loving?? Is it so much a mystery what memories these two are carrying, what’s behind the searing tension???????

Love him. Love him Spock. Take him in your arms and love him. He’s for you. All for you. Fucking hell guys. The fuck. This movie.

.

ok.

ok I can do this

CAN U NOT

those damn eyes I swear

It’s obviously not all just superficial physical beauty. What IS beauty? Narratively we do sometimes find this ‘prettiness’ enhanced and emphasized like the old vaseline lens to set the tone of a scene (he’s vulnerable and delicate, or someone’s indeed in love with him so we see their ‘lens’ on him); but it is somewhat intangible and nebulous and changeable. I don’t think aesthetic beauty, if one deems it so, on its own, would be enough for the likes of Spock (indeed, no woman could charm him thusly); it's about something deeper. It’s about who he is. Who he is inside: the beautiful AND the imperfect. How his good and bad - how his ‘all’ -  chimes with Spock’s 'all’. The Enemy Within deals with this, and shows how Spock loves all of Kirk, wants him complete, with both his light and shadow. The beauty of all of us is this totality and variance, not one intangible quality.

I’ll bet Spock’s parents knew immediately. Can you imagine Sarek trying to be a total bitch over Kirk, having heard the rumours and just wanting to have one more thing to reject Spock over, immediately projecting onto Kirk as some blow-up pretty-boy and how Incredibly More Disappointing My Son Is for being Obviously In Love With Stupid Illogical Human Doll Face Bubble Butt Bimbo Captain, and Amanda’s like, stfu, let me remind you Kirk is actually a Fucking Amazing Highly Decorated Starship Captain who Saves Your Life and don’t you DARE resent him just because he’s got tits/ass/tum/lips that won’t quit and is obviously the freakin’ sun Spock orbits. Mr ‘I married a human but that was special because it was logical’ or some bullshit. How is Kirk an illogical choice? I mean literally, Spock is a Science Genius™ on the federation’s FLAGSHIP whose well-matched Genius Captain™ understands him, accepts him, brings the best out of him, helps him fulfil his whole potential and is in love with him in the deepest and purest way and will be his bonded soulmate for ALL OF TIME and that fucking sour-faced bih at the start of that ep, ffs.

Of course Amanda stays in touch with Kirk, adores the fuck out of him, sends him old Vulcan lit on t’hy’la bonds (yes sarek, a T’HY’LA bond, so revered freakin’ poets write about it) etc because frankly her son could do FAR FUCKING WORSE.

FAR. FUCKING. WORSE.

Don’t...just don’t slip the bod into the equation, the face is enough for one post. We’re all in therapy for this already, let’s not relapse.

Oh, what’s the use. I’m gonna die. This is it. This is like the Monty Python joke that is so funny it kills you. This man is lethal. I need to stop this thread and purge all my emotions

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

That’s it. I’m dead. You’re dead. We’re all dead.

I hope, however, seeing this post was worth it. See you at Gol everyone.

.

.

The Forbidden Texts, DO NOT READ:

Kirk bod appreciation #6: The Curves. The Front. The...chest. AND THE AMAZING GREEN WRAP

Kirk bod appreciation #5: The Paws

Kirk bod appreciation #4: The Curves. The Back. Poetry in motion.  

Kirk bod appreciation #3: Season 3 (Part 1)

Kirk bod appreciation #2b: The Gluteus Maximus

Kirk bod appreciation #2a: The Gluteus Maximus

Kirk bod appreciation #1: The Tum

[t0ast-ghost]

Star Trek III: The Search For Spock thoughts!

Wow Wrath of Khan left us on a total cliffhanger so I’m glad I can just watch the next movie instead of waiting (checks google) …2 years. Goddamn. Anyway!

Warning for strong language and spoilers

Let’s get schmoving:

- They’re throwing us RIGHT BACK IN with the saddest scene ever

- SAREKS GONNA BE IN THIS ONE?! Hi bitch

- KLINGONS RAHHHH

- GET YOUR FUCKING DOG BITCH (edit: I love the Klingon monster dog <3)

- is that Janice Rand?

- Who’s in Spock’s room??

- CHEKOV ACTUALLY GETS TO SPEAK RUSSIAN

- “Jim, help me.” WHAT WHAT WHAT

- Jim lost one husband and the other is possessed by spirits and having visions

- McCoy can do a pretty good Spock impression

- McCoy is now two husbands in one. Two for the price of one kinda deal

- Stabbing me would elicit less emotion.

- LET SCOTTY REST OR LET HIM STAY ON THE ENTERPRISE

- Kirk has lost both his husbands and is now losing his ship. When will the pain and suffering cease?

- they slay

- Saavik commenting on how David is human like Kirk. Saavik saying fascinating like Spock. David and Saavik working together like the awesome siblings they are. I’m getting everything from this movie

- Did they have to make Sulu slay that hard? Yes.

- THEY PUMPED MCCOY FULL OF TRANQUILIZERS ?!? NO!!

- HII BITCH! It’s ambassador Sarek!

- “Sarek, your son meant more to me than you could know. I would give my life if it could save his.” That’s- nevermind. They’re husbands. Yada yada you get it

- okay. So Sarek was helpful. That’s a… rare occurrence

- “Then it’s my responsibility.” “Yours?” Yes! Of course it’s Kirk’s! They’re his husbands!

- “You’ll destroy yourself. Do you understand me, Jim?” The only people Jim would understand in these circumstances are mayybe Spock and McCoy but they’re not here. So he’s gonna do something stupid.

- Sulu’s outfit is going so hard

- McCoy’s at the club? He should be at the club!

- I LOBE HIS SPOCK COMING OUT OMG “to order poison at a bar is not logical.” God he’s got tho (edit: got what?)

- McCoy mixed with Spock is so funny cause it’s all of McCoy’s anger tampered down with a couple of added in logic’s

- HE TRIED TO NERVE PINCH HIM AND FAILED WHAT A LOSER LOL

- babygirl sleeping position

- “Revenge for all the arguments I won.” I like how McCoy knows Spock would be that petty

- Kirk not afraid to punch a bitch

- Sulu flips a guy IN HEELS and then proceeds to destroy a console… icon shit. He’s my hero “don’t call me tiny.”

- “Up your shaft.” Scotty ain’t taking shit

- This kid is about to get ratioed by Uhura so hard. I love her. SHE PULLED A GUN ON HIS ASS

- They’re so hot in this movie holy crap

- “Are you just gonna walk through them?!” “Calm yourself, Doctor.”

- McCoy’s standing there on the bridge after they escape the loading dock like ‘..did they just hijack and deactivate an entire starship for me?’

- Saavik’s hair is so cool

- IS THAT A CHILD

- ‘Marcus believes that Genesis has regrown Mr. Spock’ the captain is so shook like ‘uhhhhhh.. that’s amazing?…!’

- Tiny Spock is so cute omg

- welp.. Klingons

- BONES WITH SPOCKS VOICE IS SO FREAKY WTF

- A dick monster just attacked the Klingons

- Saavik must be relieved to hear her dad’s husband Kirk’s come to rescue them

- OHHH GOD. They’re gonna kill David. Oh no. Davids gonna die. He’s dead oh god. Kirk’s defeated little “David?” Oh my… god

- THEY KEPT THE “zero zero zero destruct zero” CODE??? That’s so funny

- Super cool moment. Love them

- He was having his period (edit: who? Probably Kirk? Not sure) (edit edit: it’s about young Spock grabbing his stomach in pain from pon farr but to be fair Kirk is the usual suspect for grabbing his stomach when in pain)

- So… they’re in hell. The planet is becoming a fire pit

- “Sorry about your crew, but as we say on earth c’est la vie.” God. this bitch.

- Kirk not afraid to kick a bitch… into lava

- “Help us or die.” “I do not deserve to live.” “Fine, I’ll kill you later.” Kirk is sooo done. He’s done.

- “Wait. You said you would kill me.” “I lied.”

- McCoy asking Spock for help D:

- I’m not ready for this moment- and neither is my computer cause it’s low power

- “I’m gonna tell you something that I never thought I’d hear myself say. But it seems I’ve missed you, and I don’t know if I could stand to lose you again.” mccoy- what what. What. What what. What

- I like the little hug between Kirk and Uhura

- Scotty looking between Saavik and the ceremony like ‘what the f- heck is going on?’

- So, Bones is alive. yippee!

- Saavik looking down and away from Spock when he gives her no emotion is so telling. She feels bad.

- “Why would you do this?” “Because the needs of the one outweigh the needs of the many.” JUST SAY YOU LOVE HIM smh

- They’re just staring at each other for a solid couple of seconds which I- personally - think should have been utilized by Spock going to kiss Kirk

- Leonard is so happy to have Spock back

- Group hug ! :3

That was pretty good. I enjoyed a lot of the McCoy scenes and the David and Saavik stuff. I like in the end credits they finally include Leonard Nimoy’s name because in the opening it would have been spoilers to have all the ‘as Spock’ actors names. Welp onto the next.

Masterpost

[hobbithabits]

Starting off strong with the motion picture

-music is absolutely fantastic, love it so much

-next gen music and Klingons looking epic

-the space suit still looks so stupid and I actually appreciate that

-those slutty, slutty V-neck uniforms

-clam shaped evil cloud?

-Spock and his shag haircut feeling a disturbance in the force

-some truly awful overdubbing

-Kirk collecting Vulcan science officers like candy

-some super cool ship designs! And a really cool transporter animation

-windows look like interactive roller coaster rides

-interesting change on the emblems

-super fuckin expensive shot of our beautiful wife, the enterprise

-the docking area is super cool actually

-chaos in the workers is such a good addition

-new tech is awesome

-blue hallways?

-JANICE

-UHHHHHH WTF THEY JUST??? Damn. Came out swinging with that.

-literally so many people dying right now

-sulu is so hot

-drafted my old man doctor cause I need him in a profoundly gay way

-Jim Kirk getting some bones therapy

-of course Kirk getting trapped in a big hole. Slut.

-okay this is actually really weird

-Kirk is absolutely not fit to captain the enterprise rn

-Spock! Oh, he’s a little fucked up actually

- three guys with a questionable emotional attachment in a room. Nothing wrong, surely

- “steady as she goes” STEADY AS SHE GOOOOEESSS~

-everything giving a very marine/ocean vibe

-another really long and very very expensive pan over

-I love it when they use love against people. Cool and fun.

-I mean they really just stole everything from this for tng. Nothing wrong with that but. Will decker and iliya and will riker and Deanna?

-Jesus Spock maybe don’t meld with fucking everything? Even a full Vulcan wouldn’t do that. You’re trying too hard sweetie.

-spirk making out so hard in front of literally everyone

-bones is so out of pocket. I love him. My pookie

-certified living robot parent James Kirk

-the artwork <33333

-sometimes to beat someone you just gotta have sex with them

-great visuals all around

-love to see the triumvirate together, they’re so scrunkle

-Issac Asimov jumpscare

-good ending, lovely movie.

Today is my fathers birthday (happy birthday jeff ) so we are watching all of the tos movies in one sitting so we’re going movie by movie with my thoughts 👍

[waytoeden]

1.6: Mudd’s Women

note: trigger warning for sexual assault & human trafficking - these are topics present in this episode and in my comments; please proceed with caution if you are sensitive to these topics ❤️ stay safe babes

also one of my least favorite episodes because i feel like they just brush past the obvious sex trafficking?? the federation is quite literally the space police can’t they do something about this?? apparently not just like the real police

why is uhura not in red??? this is uncomfortable

kirk not listening to scotty ever is so funny

not the lithium crystals :/

g-g-g-g-girls???

i do love their outfits tho

spock is so funny i love him being disgusted with scotty & mccoy

“men will always be men no matter where they are” i hate this why is everyone horny

he just called these three girls his “cargo” are you kidding me

the face spock makes at kirk is so funny

sulu trying to be straight

he tells these girls “don’t submit to a med check” oh my god

i hate this mans mustache

uh oh seduction alert

“i recruit wives for settlers” so human trafficking?

“there was no men on my planet” :/ sounds like a dream

the guards are hearing him talk about taking over the ship and they do nothing??

bones pls keep it in your pants

she’s radioactive

this girl is so pretty man gay moment

WHY ARE KIRK & EVE TALKING THROUGH THIS SCREEN this is so weird

jim is absolutely not a paragon of virtue

uh jim?? maybe ask her what she meant by that??

pls don’t tell me she’s pregnant

spock’s little smirk while bones is talking

bones saying “bleep”

this scene is just:

“it’s a miracle for some man who can appreciate it and who needs it.” gross

also they didn’t ��turn ugly” they really just took off their makeup

bruh you cannot trade crystals for women

“if we like them. we’d like to have a look at them first, of course.” “trot them out, captain” this is so fucking gross

these miners are ASSHOLES

“you could get lost 12 feet from your doorstep” cool detail i bet thats not gonna give her an idea

this is the weirdest party i’ve ever seen

“the sound of male ego. you travel halfway across the galaxy and it’s still the same song”

“female cooking again” bro what?? he’s mad bc she made him food??

“i’ve tasted better - by my own hand” asshole

WHY ARE THE CARDS CIRCULAR i both hate and love when they try to make everything quirky and space-y

"yes in the future we decided that rectangular playing cards are inconvenient and stupid"

pls she literally just took her makeup off AND SHE LOOKS GREAT WITHOUT MAKEUP ON

“men - more aggressive; women - more feminine” yes because those traits are opposites of each other this makes sense sure

“you can’t condemn the women” “i can” ok that's a very sexist but very funny line

venus drugs? those are just gummy vitamins

WHAT DID I FUCKING SAY BRO?? THEY ARE

“there’s only one kind of woman” nice

jim’s smirk when mudd says “they’ll throw away the key” if jim appeared as a character witness

what if these women don’t wanna be with these guys?? this is concerning

“a most annoying emotional episode” i agree spock

“the fact that my internal arrangement differs from yours, doctor, pleases me to no end”

the message of this one…apparently not that human trafficking is bad..maybe just ”believe in yourself”

[noitsbecky127]

rebecca watches tos: patterns of force

ok so starfleet lost a guy and now they’re looking for the guy

I went “alright who violated the Prime Directive this time?” and dad just pointed to the picture of the guy and went “him!”

ah, hats for spock make a return

but who are they hiding from

PLANET NAZI???

dad was just like “oh I remember this episode, the nazi one”

so there are the ekosians and the zeons and the ekosians are doing nazism against the zeons

oh shit john gill made it planet nazi

why though

how do the ekosians tell zeons from one of them though???

“you should make a very convincing nazi” idk whether the fact that shatner and nimoy were both jewish makes this better or worse

and off comes the helmet, this is awkward

“you are not from zeon” “obviously” lmao

the description of why nazis hate zeons definitely hits close to home

deus ex crystal time

I’m not entirely certain of what they’re doing rn but I know they’re doing a good job of it

that escape method made NO SENSE, but when I pointed it out dad went “oh yeah so unlike everything else in star trek” and you know what he has a point

will they please give the zeon guy some answers

ah ok he has a name, he’s isak

damn, poor guy just lost his fiance

“now you ask me to help strangers” sir do you want to overthrow the nazis or not

rip abrom, we hardly knew ye

ohhhh ok it was a test

ah and the lady’s a double agent, good for her

see this is the problem with aliens who look entirely human, a dude can just come in and pretend to be one of them

and the phrase “final solution” has been dropped

they just acted official and walked right in

“we may make a human of you yet” “I hope not” I love them

he broadcasts from the booth? pay no attention to that man behind the curtain

my dad said in response to that “pay no attention to the nazi behind the curtain”

gill is…very stiff

alright bones has been summoned

and the summoning is having Consequences now

please do not send bones down naked

well this is awkward

they are getting insanely lucky today

his mouth is strategically obscured

alright, into the room they go?

yep

alright gill’s drugged…but then who drugged him? ig that’s the next question

within an hour? these nazis work absurdly fast

and spock shall now mind-meld with the fuhrer

why the FUCK would he take from nazi germany

actually why interfere at all? just let the war play out, ffs, you were supposed to not intervene

“most efficient state earth ever knew” oh for FUCK’S sake

what the hell is the plan here

jim just gives gill another hypo even though that is a Terrible Idea

why do people always do racism to spock

the irony of calling spock stupid

eyyy here’s gill, setting the record straight!

and now he’s dead

finishing the episode off with a philosophical discussion

whose idea was this episode lmao

[ichayalovesyou]

The One With The Whales (Live Reaction):

Saw parts of this one when I was super little! Oh good! This one is also directed Leonard Nimoy! He has my whole heart already so can’t wait to see this play out!!

Uh Oh. TOS crew on trial 😬😬😬 SAREK?!?! Oh shit oh shit oh shit!! Ohhhhhh man the gang is already in deep shit.

Awww looking at Spock from the distance all dramatic like huh Jim? You getting some mini therapy from yo mommmmmm 😭😭 I love Spock so so muchhhhhh. And I LOVE Amanda!!!! Oh, and the Captain of the Saratoga! She seems awesome!

Bye Saavik, you were cool and I hope we see you again someday. Awwww Bones is worried about Spock :( he and Jim both want Spock back so bad but don’t wanna push him and awwwwwwwww!! Also why does the probe sound like Jumanji drums??? Bones and Spock are actually killing me, this conversation is actually killing meeeeeee, arguing really is McCoy’s first love language! 😭

Whatever I may think of Sarek as a father, he is such a cool character and Mark Lenard really is an absolutely fantastic actor. Oh yikes, looks like the stars have aligned for Jim and the Bridge Family to save the world yet again lmao. Honestly this whole thing with the message for the whales makes me think of “So Long & Thanks For All The Fish” from Hitchiker’s Guide To The Galaxy. Also Bones being protective of Spock ☺️

I’m so glad at least Bones is acknowledging the plot of this movie is absolutely fucking insane 😂 THIS IS WHY I LOVE OLD STAR TREK! It’s not afraid to be absolutely unapologetically ridiculous! I love it!!! Thaaaaaats a weird dream right there, you good Jim?

Stupid problems require stupid solutions! LOVE the headband Spock 😂🤣 what an ENTRANCE!! Wow it sure is the 80s, WOW, the cognitive dissonance of these bozos wandering around 20th century San Fran I am LOSING MY MIND! They are just little kreatures and they have no monies 😂😂😂 NUCLEAR WESSELS!!!! Oh god stahp I can’t breathe!!!!

I BELIEVE IN THE BEASTIE BOYS MEETING SPOCK ON THIS BUS THEORY OHHHHH MY GOD!! Jim is so old lmao! And then everyone clapped! Kirk please, I’m already laughing so hard PLEASE don’t teach Spock how to swear I’m losing my mind!!!

Wow that vibe when you remember this movie actually legitimately helped save the blue whales as a species. SPOCK IS GOING SWIMMING HERE WE GOOOOOOOOO!! JIM’S FACE! Also Nimoy can get it, damn “these are not the hell your whales.” Lmaooooo

I love this marine biologist lady she’s great! Lol. “No ma’am no dipshit.” Also “Gracie is pregnant.” *HITS BREAKS* this movie is fucking amazingggggg the legendary Italian food conversation I love themmmmmm. Bones & Scotty’s improv skills are legendary “millions of- I mean thousands of miles from Edinburough” look at this insanity, I love it.

Why do I hang around with that ditzy guy who knows Gracie’s pregnant and calls you Admiral? “He’s my husband.” (Totally posting this one! XD)

UH OH PAVEL!!!! 😨 RUN PAV RUUUUUUUUUUUN!! Oh noooo. NO THE WHAAAAALES!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS BAD YALL AHG MY FEELINGS FUDGE FUDGE FUDGE AND CRAP!! This poor woman oh my god lmao, that look on her face when she saw Spock she was like “oh, he’s an alien, that makes a lot more sense.”

SPOCK HES BACK HES OKAY HES ALL THE WAY BACK AND HE LOVES STUDENT SURROGATE SON PAVEL CHEKOV IM NOT CRYING YOU ARE!!!!!!!!! “It’s the human thing to do...” 😭😭😭😭

“Pavel... rank... Admiral!” ON BRAND LMFAO! SHE GREW A NEW KIDNEY! This movie is going to kill me in the opposite freaking way TSFS did lmao. Oh wow whale lady was just like IM COMING TO THE FUTURE FUCK YOUUUUU and honestly, mood.

Bones and Jim being so happy to see that Spock is (for the most part) back to his old self and my heart is meltingggggg

ADMIRAL THERE BE WHALES HERE!!!

I really do not understand people who don’t like Kirk I really, really don’t. He’s wonderful and sweet and smart and brave and I love him. Nobody convince me otherwise that he is good and awesome and good.

Dude this scene is so wholesome and good and fun!!! Oh my god!! The music! SPOCK IS SMILING! This is single handedly watering my crops and clearing my skin! “I stand with my shipmates.” THEY GOT OFF BECAUSE THEY DID IT FOR LOVE AND THEN SAVED THE WHOLE ASS PLANET AFTER YASSSSSSS!!! Spock & Jim should’ve kissed right there I’m just saying. Also Jim & whale lady deserve a long lasting (if long distance) friendship.

Spock even gets to reconcile with his parents awwwww, Sarek is finally recognizing that his son can move mountains because of who he is. “Tell her (mother) I feel fine.” Okay good I’m crying again. 💚🖖🏻💚😭😭😭

ITS THE ENTERPRISE B!!!! 🤩🤩🤩 THEYRE HOMMMMME *Pterodactyl shrieking*

That was so wholesome oh my goddddd