#and what am I supposed to do

[just-your-average-tangerine]

Hate when a post gets more popular than I anticipated, and the claim that I forsaw and refuted in the tags is made by someone who only saw the post several reblogs later and therefore never saw the tags refuting that exact claim

[lunaechaos]

.

[anathemacore]

idk what's wrong with me i go through my life wanting nothing more than to have friends and then whenever i do i end up not liking them once i get to know them better. eight months in i'm tired of them. sometimes i think boring people like me. maybe it's just that cool people *don't* like me. am i too picky? is it too much to ask for to want friends who i get along with in a fulfilling way? whenever i have friends i end up feeling that they don't understand me and they're not right for me and i'm not content. is that valid or do i just have attachment issues? why do i keep being interested in people until i learn more about them and find out they're not actually interesting? one of my biggest issues with people is that i don't feel seen by them. but also i don't really try to show myself to them very much because i think i'm actually an unlikeable dick deep down who's too damaged to be useful. but also i am doing my best to get along with people and generally come off as a likeable person.. i feel i'm a very good judge of character and i can tell if people are not able to see me in the way i want to be seen. it's not kind to expect more of people than what they are capable of and i can tell if people aren't what i want in a friend. and then there's that issue of seeing myself as an object and just wanting to be "useful" to people because i just want to be a perfect machine whose job it is to make everyone happy and it's so hard not to act like i am and ignore my own feelings because really, my feelings aren't important. they shouldn't be, i'm just an object. this causes me to stay in relationships i don't want to be in anymore because to leave a relationship where i'm not happy but the other person is is a failure on my part because if i'm not making people happy then i'm not fulfilling my purpose. to leave a situation where i'm making someone happy is like walking out on my job where the payment is the satisfaction of a job well done, nullifying the point of my existence. i dream of having friends that make me just as happy as i make them, i want symbiosis and i usually have it at the beginning, and then the happiness dries up for me. can i really keep blaming people for not being my type when this keeps happening to no end? is this what friendship is like in adulthood? no. i see adults with continuously symbiotic relationships. why can't i have them too?

[rochichan]

If Epic the Musical was an anime

[z-mizcellaneous-z]

Fucking CRYING IM USING THAT PHRASE FOR EVERYTHING NOW

[mad-serotonin]

Take It Easy☀️

[mochasucculent]

Was looking at refs and since Viktor has two different leg braces I was wondering, do we think he wears them simultaneously?? The refs don't perfectly line up perspective-wise so it's hard to tell but parts of the one he wears during the Hexcore scenes look like they could maybe line up with the brace that he wears over his clothes, but also some parts really don't and look like they'd be super uncomfy. Also HOW does he take these on and off. Experts weigh in

[shoehorseconstant]

I used to fantasize about what it would be like to have him in my life and introduce him to everyone and go on cute dates with him and finally be special to someone but I think it's just not my time to understand those things

[queen-of-wisdom]

I always thought it's weird that poems are always about misery or love or both.

But when I actually started to write poetry I realized: that's it. That's the point.

[givemeureyes]

day 1 without ao3: i have gone through all 5 stages of grief multiple times and have invented a 6th. i will not disclose what the 6th stage of grief is.

[joshuamj]

Hero.

[theaceofarrows]

[dead-inside-demiboy]

Im sorry but being aromantic and/or asexual is such a beautiful, complex identity that opens up almost endless possibilities and interpretations about sex and romance and relationships and struggles within those,

and i will always absolutely LOATHE how both the outside and the aro/ace community itself have boiled these identities down to just "doesnt have sex" and "doesnt date"

[inkskinned]

the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.

sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.

you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.

it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.

but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.

they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.

they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.

barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.

and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.

but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.

they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!

this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.

[elminster-big-naturals]

when its 4am and the whole squad is zooted out their gourds trying to read the overhead menu in mcdonalds

[downydig]

alright ALRIGHT she's my favorite i KNOW it's perdictable for me!