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clarabowmp3 · 3 months ago

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#ok so #I met this guy on Roblox last year #this is alr very embarrassing for me to admit but wait it gets WORSE #and we connected on discord and just casually chatted for maybe a week or 2?#but then last year was my a level year and around that time I was having a lot of tests #so I was taking longer and longer to reply back and he felt hurt and I felt bad for hurting his feelings #but also I was like hell bent on getting that perfect score so #so I told him maybe it’s best we don’t rlly talk cuz I’m busy w this and u want someone less occupied w other stuff #and man that was roughhhh like i didn’t expect him to act so cut up abt it #but he was still being so respectful I was like (internally) ur making this very hard for me 😭😭#but I stood my ground and we kind of stopped after that #then after my a levels he texted me and we were planning to do a vc #and we were trying to pick a time when #and we stopped talking like we both ghosted each other? idk #cuz I got swept up in other stuff after #a levels #but like a few days back I saw he was online on Roblox and I suddenly felt rlly bad/nostalgic for our short chat thing #and I kind of wanted to text him but I didn’t want to double text (LAME REASON I KNOWWW 😭😭)#and he just texted me this morning #like out of the blue after MONTHS of radio silence #and after a few days when I started thinking abt him again #I just #😭😭😭😭

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lightningidle · 8 months ago

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Fig's line "I don't think I'm an artist, I think I'm just a good friend" has not left my head at all. Just...

You're Fig Faeth and your horns came in over the summer and you pick up the bard class as a form of adolescent rock 'n' roll rebellion, and it works! It's exactly the outlet you need! You give a guy you just met drumsticks and you start a band and it's good enough that within a year and a half you're touring. You are, in every sense, good at being a bard.

And then, finally, your junior year, you start to take it seriously. Your art goes from an outlet and a form of rebellion to a practice. A discipline. (Can rebellion exist within a discipline?) Your classmates know what they want to do with their work. They all have a thesis statement. And yeah, there's cohesion in the music you make, but you've never had to think about why you make it. You've never sat down and dissected what it is about bass that speaks to you. You've never poured over your lyrics to pick at any deeper meaning. Why should you? You don't play music for a grand design, you do it to... huh, why do you do it?

(Your art is the one form of self-expression that feels as safe as Disguise Self does, because even if you're pouring your heart onto the page and then screaming it in front of thousands of people, it's not like you're really making yourself known. You can sing I'm lonely, I'm scared, I'm furious, and your fans will sing it right back, and there will still be the distance between performer and audience to keep your heart safe.)

Now you're being asked to look inward to explain the artistic choices you're making, and you can't help but recoil at that, because you'd rather do anything than look inward. Meanwhile, your classmates have no problem with it, so you start to wonder if you're a real artist at all. Can your art be authentic if it only exists to bolster a thesis statement? Has your art been unauthentic this whole time because you've never really thought about a thesis statement before? Is that what makes it art, and not just the next track on somebody's teen angst playlist?

You can't think about yourself— acknowledging your own existence makes you want to puke. So if your music is an extension of yourself, (and it is, even if it's just because the spotlight reveals only what you want it to,) you can't think about your music. You can't. You have to. Your grade depends on it.

You're Fig Faeth, and you keep multiclassing because you'd rather be a good friend than a great artist. If introspection is what great art demands, then fuck it. You must not be a bard at all.

#Dimension 20 #fig faeth #fhjy #Idle Chatter #my last two years of college were when I started to get more and more nauseous about my own art #because I wasn't being taught how to make the art I wanted to make #the whole curriculum's focus was on gallery art #which infuriated me! I wanted to make art that didn't have to involve twelve layers of meaning and metaphor to be considered good!!#so I drove myself into the ground time and again trying to make (miserable) work that I thought would fit the criteria of a Real Artist #anyway it's been 4 years and I'm just now picking at why I don't enjoy creating anymore so Fig's whole arc has hit home in a major way #ALSO. AAAAALSO. THE ADHD STRUGGLE WE SEE WITH BOTH FIG AND KRISTEN. LOVING SOMETHING BUT STILL STRUGGLING WITH FOLLOW THROUGH #BEING TOLD YOU'RE NOT DOING ENOUGH WHEN IT'S SO FUCKING HARD JUST TO GET WHERE EVERYONE ELSE IS AND NOT UNDERSTANDING WHY IT'S HARD FOR YOU #it was easy and now that the rubber's hit the road it's hard for you but not for others so it must be YOU that's the problem #you must be lazy or stupid or just not suited to this after all even though it's part of a pattern that has been happening all your life #if you were good enough or cared enough then surely the discipline would come easily to you! the way it comes easily to all your classmates #SCREAMS I gotta stop before I write a second essay in the tags. I'm so normal you can trust me to be normal about D&D characters

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deoidesign · 4 months ago

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Allowing myself to work on this comic. A LITTLE. Please....... I'm making comics all day every day please let me chase my bliss a little........... With a different comic...........

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theygender · 1 month ago

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My kitten has a new favorite teeny tiny mouse toy that we got at her first vet checkup and she loves it so much. We call it her mousey. She goes crazy over it and could play with it for hours, but sometimes she bats it somewhere she can't reach and we have to get it for her

Today she was getting into a bunch of stuff she shouldn't and I realized that I hadn't seen her playing with her mousey all day. So I asked out loud (rhetorically) "where's your mousey?" and started looking for it so I could give her that to play with instead. As soon as I said that though she walked over to a box of my gf's craft stuff and started pawing behind it, and when I moved it the mousey was right there

She knows the word mousey and she led me to her toy so I could get it for her 🥺 she's such a smart baby

#shes still running around with it shes so cute. i can hear her collar jingling even from the other room #shes only like 11 weeks old and shes already so smart!#it seems like she has a really strong hunting instinct too. i bet she would make an excellent mouser if we lived on a farm lol #this mouse toy is tiny compared to her other ones but its the most realistic looking #and while she does also love feather toys (until she pulls all the feathers out lol) this is her favorite toy by far #she also keeps like trying to attack drawings of bugs lol #my gf printed off some business cards with drawing of beetles on them for her cosplay stuff #and before she had finished cutting them out when they were still just laying on the floor #astrid went over there and just started smacking the heck out of them lol #like she was staring very intently at the beetle and smacking it HARD with precision over and over #she did the same thing with our otgw dvd case a few days later lol so i guess she thinks greg and wirt look like bugs?#anyway shes a very cute and smart baby #also very brave. our other two cats are scaredy babies and run and hide at the slightest provocation #lawnmowers for example are one thing that make them scared so if they hear one outside theyll run and hide #the first time astrid heard one tho she was just curious. she walked over to the window to try and figure out what the sound was #she was too tiny to jump up there on her own at that time so i picked her up so she could look outside #and she just watched it with curiosity. and now that shes big enough to jump up on her own she does the same thing lol #its so cool to see her unique personality evolving as she grows up. i love her so much #rambling

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uygfiug · 1 month ago

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turns out i turned the assignment i was stressing over into something a lot more complicated in my head & its actually really simple

#somehow mistook my far too ambitious plans as the actual assignment #:(#this is really good though bc i thought id be at this all day but if all goes well i could be done in like 2 hours #:)))#which is good bc i have 2 tests tomorrow and an assignment #none of which were put on the online platform we use #which means that i forgot #and another test i have to redo at some point #but i dont know when #aaaghhh why is there so much work always #oh and i need to work on my final project too #the current step is due by the end of next week & its a lot of work #i have to find a bunch of relevant sources #and then paste or type all relevant parts of them in a document #and also provide a defence as to why the sources i picked are trustworthy #and i have to do this for a bunch of them #i have to defend them all individually too #if it was just a text on how i judged the trustworthyness that would be fine #but this is a lot #and im also trying to prepare for the exams already #mine #im so so sick of school #i want some free time to watch a film #!!#its been at least 2 weeks since i had the time #ugh #are they trying to drive us all to burn out or something??

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elftwink · 3 months ago

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i know ive said this exact same thing ten thousand times before but it actually boggles my mind that we have just sort of accepted "generational divides" and the resulting discourse. generations are not real on the population scale. there is no dividing year where one generation starts and the next begins. the closest you can get to this is specifically BABY BOOMERS. who were born during the BABY BOOM. because a huge large amount of people had children immediately following the second world war. thats it. since then there has not been another clear generational divide and the things you think are clear divides are probably divides between specifically your age demographic and specifically your parents age demographic. because that's what a generation actually is when we stop trying to form stupid little clubs. im no longer participating in the legitimization of these terms & if i see the word zoomer one more time i'll detonate the explosives

#good idea generator #esp bc the most common way ppl try to draw distinctions other than arguing abt year cutoffs #is things like 'what technology you had as a kid' 'what tv shows did you watch'#like. can you at LEAST talk about REAL WORLD EVENTS??? MAYBE?? AND NOT SOMETHING THAT WILL CHANGE #BASED ON PERSONAL TASTE AND/OR AVAILABLE FUNDS TO BUY NEW SHIT ALL THE TIME??#also cant lie to you i just personally resent the cutoff for millennial being before the millennium. why are we trying to pick a random yr #in the 90s. when the word specifically references the millennium. obviously the cutoff should be 2000 #'oh its bc they were children in the 90s' no actually i dont think 96 babies are 90s kids #96 in terms of 'experiencing the 90s' is exactly the same as 97-99. you were baby. you experienced baby #i think for you to be a [decade] kid. you need to be born before that decade starts. if you're not at least 10 by the end of that decade #u cant claim it. sorry. you were not a kid then you were baby #if you disagree with this explain to me exactly in what way this arbitrary distinction is different #from the arbitrary distinction of year cutoffs for generational divides. ill wait

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girl-bateman · 2 months ago

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Remind me again not to act foolish with men <3

#its crazy but i genuinely think this guy does not like me even tho we clearly like each other #we spent the entire night talking and then when im like ? trying to set up something for the future he doesn't pick up on it at all 😩#cus our scheduled events are over now so i was like... now were not gonna see each other as much :( .... and he was like 🤷‍♀️ well #bro tf do u mean im trying to give u an opening here so that we can be friendsssss dont diss me !#its sad too bc we had some nice convos and vibes but hes just so hard to read at times #like we clearly like each other why are you trying to make me look stupid by acknowledging that #bitch !#anyway if he doesent reach out to me im gonna have to send him a picuture of a spider as punishment #diary entries

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emelinstriker · 9 months ago

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mmmnnother idea too

#sneak peek #hyperfixation says esau cast in dnd style- but i don't think i'll do em the way i did nezha's doodle cuz that was a horrible way of shading #at least for me personally KEKW-#emelin rambles #to bed i go #i wanna try sleepin early for once #also i find it funny how as a dental tech i know why my jaw is hurting rn #muscle stress would be my guess cuz it's just the side of my jaw around the area of my left mandibular condyle #so i'm currently tryna force myself to physically relax more to try get rid of it quicker cuz it's annoying when tryna eat at times #also i was at an info meeting about a study some university students wanna do with autists regarding noise cancelling headphones #was hilarious considering i immediately began to critique the way the meeting went by telling my psychologist about #how they had the audacity to give a full group of diagnosed autists the OPTION to pick between showing up on a monday or tuesday #cuz we were all fuckin confused and one girl even had to ask like 2-3 times about how tf this would work and when we're supposed to come in #like how dare you tell us we can pick a day- that sparked so much lowkey panic and i could tell by the confusion of all- including myself #just give us a solid day DHFNDFHNDHFGNHDGH

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toxooz · 10 months ago

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omg i literally love wheelbitten as a comic and ur art is amazing

random question but how long have u been drawing as an artist and do u have advice.............

thank uuuu and I've been drawin my ass off since I could hold a pencil and I'm 24 (25 next month) now so this shit wasn't overnight by any means lmfao idk the way i did it was have A Thing that you like drawing and just draw the fuck outa it and eventually you'll get better for sure whether it be the desire to get better at drawing said thing makes you do research and study something to become better at it or just literal muscle memory from drawing said thing so much. I had lil spouts of taking time to get better at specific things like anatomy, shading, ect. by studying it but overall i just subconsciously got better by mentally picking up new things everytime i draw and analyzing the world around me. Even recently i got to see that with drawing tactical gear (that ive never really drawn before and never wanted to draw in my life) soley bc i just REALLY fukkin love Ghost and Konig

i went from being terrified and intimidated of drawing tactical gear (even trying to put a gun in front of it as if that was any better lmfao) it used to be vague as hell and my brain would shut down just trying to look at the references(i remember having a ''shit man am i even gunna be able to draw these characters???'' moment of dread the first time i was drawing Konig pffft) to absolutely loving drawing tactical gear and seeing how much more detailed i can make it with every new drawing, so a complete 180 but that's bc im just totally obsessed with the characters and drawing is how i express that sO thats mainly what i mean by just have a thing that you love and want to draw and the rest should follow with time, patience, and practice. I think it's about training your brain and motivation to pick up on details or a certain way something looks in lighting (or lack thereof) bc my brain is probably wired a certain way after art being like a centerpiece of my development to the point to where drawing is just What I Do and at this point if i dont draw for even a few days i start getting vaguely antsy and fidgety it's crazy lmfao SO idk if this is worded like i need it to but yeah art and the act of drawing can be frustrating as hell but it should be enjoyable and rewarding above all else at the end of the day!

#i drew bc the piece of shit im unfortunately biologically related to drew a lot when we were kids so id just copy her #then i drew winged wolves and dragons and the occasional horse for like 7 years then The Axel obsession started #where i drew axel from kindom hearts literally all the time and had 870000 aus for him where i would draw for all of them #when i tell you the obsession for him was catastrophic u best believe but it kept me drawing like a motherfucker until i made my monster oc #which was around the age of 15 is when i started consistently drawing humanoids #OH YEAH i had a whole lion king phase too in 2011 where i would strictly draw lions all the time and my first record of drawing online was #on the lion king fanart archive (which i still visit to look back its like visiting an old janky friend:') )#but yeah then my heart was stolen by my ocs and all the potential designs i could make them #and thats where i am now aside from the festering COD masked men obsession boiling over in the corner AHA #so basically latch onto an obsession and pick up that damn pencil #even as a kid if i liked anything the immediate connection was trying to draw it #didnt matter how weird to draw or undrawable it was my ass would be in that notebook bc its the only way i know how to express myself lmfao #this is long as fuck but NOW im out peace skskksk

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agentartemus · 19 days ago

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I thought today was a good one..

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icewindandboringhorror · 5 months ago

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Apparently I can meet my goal of roughly 400,000 words in 6 months if I just somehow write at least 2,200 words a day ghbjh... Almost 2,500 today... huzzah...

#Definitely not going to be able to stick with it just due to like... being realistic about my energy levels and etc. ESPECIALLY as we #enter the Evil Summer and it becomes hot all the time. But... one can attempt.. at least...#I'm also a very slow writer since I tend to re-read and edit while I write. and only move onto the next section once what I'm writing #seems okay. Which is easy for visual novel type stuff. since ''sections'' of a conversation are more clearly marked (like if you #have a menu option with 5 different dialogue choices. finish the character's response for choice 1 before moving onto 2. etc.)#Especially since when I'm done with a whole quest I always follow it up by playing through it and picking every option and making sure it #actually all works okay and etc. So I am already going to see it all a second time. Then I can go back and reorder a few words or remove #certain sentences that don't sound natural when I read them out loud (I always read it all outloud to myself since it is... just peple #talking.. it should sound like natural dialogue in their voice. etc). But my ''first draft'' is kind of not as first drafty since I pause t #edit a lot as I go along. So it also takes longer probably than it would take other people who I think treat a first draft as more #of a loose guideline or something. AANYWAY...#80F in my bedroom right now again... huzzah... I did end up finishing and recording that sims build video before the heat wave (or is #it really a heat wave if it's just summer..?? lol) came in.. but now... augh.. the editing... plus the costume photos and all else... Much #to do as always.. Often such a long todo list.. a giant scroll hung upon the walls of the evil hermit wizard tower..#Anyhow.. I hope I can finish getting ready for bed early in time to reward myself with a game of tripeaks solitaire whilst I snack on #cheddar cheese and some of those preserved artichokes in a jar. hrgm... I actually have nasturtiums (ultimate best flower) on the #deck again this year but I had to move them all into a corner today because the leaves were getting burnt by the sun lol.. Also am now more #cautiously weaving through social media to ignore all dragon age news. NOT bc of spoilers (I actually love spoilers/literally never play #any game until there's full guides on it I can read to plan my entire playthrough based on knowing exactly what I want to happen lol + mods #and etc.) but just because I'm so busy with my ownprojects I simply do not have the brainspace to dedicate... Yes I love to think #about elves and fictional universe lore. but no.. I pretend I do not see it. Does not exist to me actually. ghgj.. OHH also took som #cool pictures of flowers in the garden section of a store and I wanted to do like.. character designs based on the colors of the flowers o #something. but that might just be another unnecessary project to add to the pile.. I want to commit to the daunting task of dyeing my #hair again some time.. hrm.. this is all of the updates I can think of. As if a bunch of random tags make up for never posting anything for #weeks on end lol.. alas.. too warm to think properly I suppose.. .. I neeeeeed a long lost relative to leave me some million dollar #estate in their will so I can have the resources to move to a colder climate or something ..augh #.. but for now.. I shall toil away in my little wizard tower trying to write 2000 something words a day whilst sweating and such ghbj

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motheatenscarf · 1 month ago

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God, I hope patch DT msq is good.

#i just want to be able to talk about msq with good faith criticism again.#endwalker patch content breaking the trend of not being as good or better than base expansion was a fluke right?#we're gonna address the several elephants in the room of rushed plotlines that DT fumbled hard right?#we're gonna put in fun unique duties for u to play in instead of just making it all cutscenes right? cuz it's a game and therefore #an interactive medium right? u can even let me play as The Character Whose Name Summons Hellfire that's fine! that duty was fun!#and i love getting to see characters' unique strengths like that in gameplay!#some of my favorite story moments are from getting to FEEL the struggle of characters who aren't the wol! it's always impactful!#and we did not get enough this time.#all of her trials should have been interactive.#how cute would it have been to have to play as her trying to catch a llama? the spit gets on u and gives u heavy debuff.#how much fun to actually have to remember what ingredients went where and when they came in for a silly cooking mini game?#how RAD would that train scene have been if u had to play a duty to defend it with turrets and not just a cutscene!?#other expansions would have done this! this is why people were bored! half of it was low stakes non-interactive filler that didn't matter.#and the other half had no room to breathe and threw out insane shit with huge leaps in logic and felt contrived as hell bcs it was rushed.#just... be a cute beach episode but still be a fun game to play! or be the epic feelings jrpg but give shit time to marinate! pick! ONE!!!

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dennisboobs · 1 year ago

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do you guys ever sit and remember that dennis takes a mental health day is an episode that exists

#ada speaks #i think i could probably recite the entire one sided phone conversation he has with daisy by heart and i havent seen the ep in months #i don't know how to explain it but #from what little ive read of ross' writing it feels like. when you click onto a fanfic and you feel immediate deep trust of the author #like it just clicks #the cookbook characterization specifically. is like.#i would put my life in your hands #and im sure we will get more eps by him and i really hope that continues because i think its been a very long time since the shows had #writers that i feel Get the characters in a way that feels effortless rather than. overcompensating.#like you can smell that writer's signature no matter how hard they try to cover it up with jokes and subversions #which isnt always a bad thing and im sure if we do get more maloney eps i'll pick up on his writers quirks too #but it doesn't feel like he's trying to copy anyone/pull from old eps it feels like he has a good grasp on things which makes it feel fresh #i find that long running shows hit a point where episodes start to feel less cohesive and more like. segmented short films #but if you have a really good group of writers and they find their groove its like. yeah. ok.#i think season 3 is a good study because marder and rosell's influence is all over the entire season #later seasons you can literally just. Feel which eps they worked on because its got a completely different vibe from the rest of the season #16 still suffers from that segmentation but #i think all the first time sunny writers (and nina's first solo ep) were all absolutely fuckin bangers and they've got a good team in there #anyway. characterization of dennis flipflops a lot. but the rest of the gang arguably gets it worse at times #i think megan's dee is the absolute worst aside from conor galvin's #and i understand wanting to write her as a girlfailure who is just. horrible. but.#ok. comparing self help book dee to ross' cookbook dee. i dont even have to say anything do i.#she's like. The Woman. in the self help book. and i fucking could not stand it. ross' dee is so perfect though #and his frank. MAN.#EVERYONE FUCKING RUINS FRANK.#i think marder and rosell's frank is a lot of fun because hes clearly based on marder's dad and acts believably #a lot of writers struggle to capture his. frank-ness.#he's sort of suffered from like. bland pervy senile old man writing for a long time #and ross brought back him actually being a competent businessman #IM OUT OF TAGS IM SHUTTING UP

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penisbilt · 6 months ago

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the bittersweet but absolute flood of relief that comes from admitting defeat at living independently, to have to move back in with parents. we tried! we gave it our best shot for almost 3 years! but living like this (being on our own) is just not possible for us at this time of our lives. we've finally proved it to ourselves that we can't do it. it'll be okay to let ourselves rest now

#latimers parents not mine!!!! i am NOT moving back to florida LOL #really hope that the changes will be good for my mental health. this apartment is toxic to us #ive been on the verge of meltdowns Kind Of A Lot lately. imnot doing great #extremely dependent on substances. just to reach a baseline level of functioning. but even that isnt working as much anymore #the only things i do on my phone or tablet these days is like. 2 mobile games. and skirting past my dms to check latimers blog #its too overwhelming to even open discord these days yknow. everything on earth is too much for me right meow #i havent been drawing i havent been social online OR irl i havent been cooking or creating #i havent been keeping up with personal hygiene like at all im particularly ashamed about that one #i've been really bad about doing my T the past few months which is a HUGE shame because im SO fucking hyped to be on it #theres just. too many obstacles in getting it done half the time. and the other half of the time i just forget #anyway. anyway.#our lease ends in july so between now and then we're just gonna try our best to tolerate our living situation enough to get by #there's a light at the end of the tunnel. and its called 'i only have to be in charge of like 2 rooms at most. and not a household!'#we're gonna try to slowly comb through all our things between now and then so the process of moving wont suck as bad #cuz listen. its pretty fucking bad right now #maybe not for other people. but it is for me. and its okay to let myself come to terms with that #im just. so relieved. still very stressed! but theres at least light at the end of the tunnel and its only like 2 months away #ill be able to draw guilt-free again. ill be able to just EXIST guilt-free #i dont think ive felt guilt-free for just existing the way i do since like. turning 20 #i know my mom wouldve loved if i stayed home forever. and im sad i cant be there for her #but ever since i had a fight with my dad at 15 or 16 it just really felt like he didnt want me there more and more #maybe as the youngest he was resenting that i was preventing him from becoming an empty nester or something. i dont know #because all the other kids had been moved out and on their own at least once but i had never left home before #i dont know if he'd be heartbroken or not to hear that i feeling like he was resenting me. but thats the energy i was picking up for years #i dunno. i dont know #anyway. back to housing. for now im going to try to relax and store energy for the moving process #the huge pile of things by the kitchen? i dont have to worry about that becoming permanent because we're leaving in 2 months #the general discord of the state of our possessions? we have to go through everything to pack it all anyway. we can move in RIGHT this time #when we moved in here we didnt have a car or license so we were dependent on latimers 3-hr-drive-away parents to help us move #just /across town/. and we had a whole month between leases! but it still had to be done in a weekend

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kyouka-supremacy · 8 months ago

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Today was a good day :)

#Today three strangers were kind to me in three different occasions. It was such a nice coincidence :)#I've been working on Akutagawa's birthday the entire week and today Akutagawa posts were all over my dash. I'm so happy!#I managed to do all the edits I had set up to and I'm glad :)#I dressed rigorously black and white and wore the black striped pants I bought because they reminded me of Beast Akutagawa's outfit #I did my nails black and red!!#My mother called me to congratulate on Akutagawa's birthday #I even baked a cake with a friend and they were so sweet /////#I'm so grateful they managed to make time for it even though they've been so busy and tired because of their job #More than everything I'm grateful they weren't weird about it #They found it a little silly but they never made fun of me. They helped me pick the cake.#And today they even told me that they looked up a video of the character to understand me better #Which TERRIFIES me because no way anyone could get a good impression of Akutagawa from a single video #But if we ignore that it was an unbelievably nice gesture :')#It's just such a foreign feeling because outside of my blog I NEVER talk about my hyperfixations irl.#Because when I used to when I was younger I was only met with scorn or mockery so ever since I started university I simply learnt not to?#And it's just so genuinely weird to talk with someone irl who wouldn't judge me for it–#and not really in the good way because part of me is still convinced that they *are* judging me for it.#Doesn't matter everything suggests the contrary. And I keep overthinking if I overshared about Akutagawa or if I said something dumb #But I'm trying it not to get to me. Today they've been nothing but nice through and through #Whatnot. The last months were very tough for some reason I'm just happy good things can still happen :)#I want to start the queue again now that I'm generally more free and done with Aktgw's birthday and everything.#I also have new exams the first days of April and the program is pretty heavy and wide. On top of following courses. I'll see what I can d #I'd like to start regularly posting again because I'm afraid if I don't I'll just sulk further in misery. We'll see.#Ah I need to catch up with the dash since I've basically not been on Tumblr for three days...#That's it just rambling. I hope everyone's days are nice too!!!#random rambles

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hivepixels · 2 months ago

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#while i was on my trip there was a tarot reading booth so i got mine read for topic: “money”#i never try this bcs im skeptical but that also means my sample size for cross-referencing is zilch. nonetheless leaving this log #mumblings #it was an interesting experience bc my sister had hers read for topic: “love” right before my turn #when she drew her five cards (deliberately picking them out in a random roundabout way) all of them were related to romance somehow #e.g card of man and woman + kneeling man presenting flowers to woman + pair of wedding rings #apparently this year she will meet a man with a personality opposite to hers. he will gift her a present and eventually propose to her #we laughed abt it afterwards bc she's a fashion student.. so all the men she links up with to model her garments r gay.#i wasnt paying close attention but im pretty sure i drew from the exact same deck yet i didnt pick any lover-looking cards #i drew mine rather predictably - mostly picking cards near the middle. one by one from left to right #my first three cards apparently gave context of fortune/luxury/nobility as real estate agent #then the fourth card was like. a cunning hooded figure sitting amidst piles and bags of gold. very disturbing contrast to the first three #mood turns still tense and dramatic. tarot lady explains i will make big bank in real estate and be very greedy abt it.#then the fifth final card is turnt over and it's a neutralizing one with flowers meaning “but despite that - i dont need to worry."#the timing of the five card reveal being done in this order mustve been staged somehow but i was too caught up in the performance of it #stared straight at the table yet could not notice how and when the deck couldve been shuffled or rearranged with sleight of hand

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