#at least for me personally KEKW-

[emelinstriker]

mmmnnother idea too

[screampied]

‘ THIS AIN’T FICTION, BABY! (it is kinda..) ★

☆ sum. jjk men finding out you write jaw dropping smut. boo you whore. can you even do half the things you write about? well . .

warnings. fem! reader, feat. gojo, geto, nanami, choso, toji, sukuna, breaking the forth wall kekw, smut writer reader, unprotected, dirty talk, praise, squırting, manhandling, cuńnilingus, whiny men, cockwarming, daddy kink, overstim, spıt, impact play, breaking the bed, bréeding, size kinks.

GOJO ☆

“oooooh,” a husky low voice coos right next to your ear. hot breath ghosts against the tiny hairs that stand tall near the back of your neck. you bit your lip whilst you’re in the midst of being stuffed full of cock. just plain evil . . satoru’s got you cockwarming him while a fat thumb of his skims down your phone. “let’s see. gojo smut, gojo satoru x reader, hey that’s me, heh,” and he pauses, a snowy brow raising up in daze once he sees your user displayed in bold near the very top of the search bar. “cockwarming gojo, how fitting, angel.”

“toru, fuck,” you whine, making a cute attempt at trying to snatch your phone away. weakly pawing at his wrist, he holds it up even higher. you gasp, feeling his swollen tip swivel its way deeper inside your cunt. “don’t read it,” you fall back into his chest, moaning once he starts to purposely bounce his thigh. embarrassment had you hot, you could practically feel your heartbeat accelerating by the minute. “ ‘s embarrassing.”

satoru squints, resuming to scroll down the glowing screen before a free hand of his trails toward your pussy. he hums, “aw, pretty girl’s got a hobby i didn’t even know of, hm. here, you say ‘he’s got you right on his lap, suppressing a moan with your teeth dug into the bottom of your lip as you’re taking him fully. .’ such nasty literature,” and the edges of your nails pierce into his pants leg. the half on long black slacks that satoru wore were merely all ruffled and ragged thanks to your pretty fingernails tugging at it with all its might. as he continues to read, you’re whining, desperate to move, desperate for at least some kind of friction. as you’re squirming on his lap, satoru’s eye then twitches. “ ‘gojo satoru also would whine in bed?’ this has to be a typo. .”

and of course, his ego gets bruised.

the pout on satoru’s face was adorable. as you’re trying to sturdy your hips, he buries his face into your chest. “mmph,” he’s shoved right between the softness of your tits, his personal happy place.

although—he had to admit, he was flattered that you wrote such lewd compositions about him. you moan as you’re grinding against him, feeling his achy cock slam into you deep within each wet bounce. satoru makes a mess as he’s buried between your plush mounds, remnants of stringy saliva dribbling down the valley of your chest. pretty, his white lashes flutter as you’re quickening your hip movements and he gasps. “oh, f- fuck, angel. ‘s no fair when you ride me like thaaat.”

and you can’t help but giggle—despite your cock drunken state, he’s still got that little glower of a pout on his lips as you’re rutting into him.

satoru’s clenched abs flex more the second you run a finger down the sharp outline of his pecs, watching him immediately fold at your touch. “but you always whine, ‘toru,” you argue in a shivering voice, your cunt tightly squeezing around his length. his wide girth makes your mouth water, such thickness was just insane. you bury your unstable knees into the center of his thighs before his broad big arms wrap around you.

he’s holding you—almost squishing you.

but just like you wrote, satoru whines the second he ends up cumming early. with the way you ride him and the crazed speed of your hips, he never ever lasted long.

it was cute,

he was always confident until he’s buried deep inside your pussy, whining and sobbing pathetic cacophonies of your name at how good you feel clamping around him. it’s merry lukewarm, as he snaps, a puddle of thick syrupy cum shoots into you deep and he’s an entire frantic mess. pants of airy breath slip out of his pink lips as he’s giving you a fill, biting into your neck to hide his slutty whimpers. “god, ‘m gonna die,” he sniffles, squeezing pressure against your bare ass. you hold onto him tight as he’s pouring such slippery wads of seed into you at once—velvety hot amounts spit inside your pussy and you’re matching heavy gasps for air right with him, entirely in sync. “fuck, fuck baby, mommy.”

“what?”

“s- shut up,” he back tracks, and he sees the smug expression growing on your face. satoru lightly smacks a hand over his face before groaning, his cock all milked and flaccid. “i said baby.”

NANAMI ☆

tender mahongy eyes stare deep into your eyes as your fingers happily intertwine with his. tangled and curled, he’s got a soft grip as his body hovers completely over yours.

with ruffled blond strands running down the front of his forehead, nanami brings a kiss toward your cheek as he’s not just fucking you, but making love to you in missionary. “sweetheart, you left your laptop open you know,” and you moan once you feel his plump tip circle its way inside of your gummy inviting walls. already, you’re coating his entire dick with your slimy slick to the hilt. your eyes widen at his words before the left side of your twitching lip is met with another gentle kiss. “i didn’t mean to be nosy, but i saw a little ‘headcanon’ about me, is that what you call it?”

you glance into his eyes with abashed intent as a burning wave of heat sprays over your face. fuck, the pulse of your thumping heart only grew louder as your first response was utter silence.

“i—” you mutter out, and he chuckles at your lack of words, digging his head into your neck. nanami’s scent was strong, it goes through each of your nostrils and you felt yourself throbbing from his touch alone.

his strokes were tender and precise. he’s swaying back and forth as his bare body continues to rut straight into you. pent up muscles of his that were merely perfectly sculptured—identical to the physique of a greek god, you couldn’t help but stare. you just couldn’t help but ogle at how he’s so pretty, how fat tears of sweat race down both sides of his bulky arms. no one could blame you for writing about nanami, although—the things you wrote about him, they were pretty risqué to say the least. with a growing pout, your arms throw over his shoulders as he’s presenting your cunt blissful deep thrusts. “okay, i write about you sometimes, ‘ken. ‘m sorry.”

“sorry for what exactly? being talented, silly girl?” he whispers in a raspy tone.

nanami cups your chin so you could look right at him, naturally leaning into his touch. he focuses on the way your eyes soften and he’s plummeting girthy inches into you raw. your toes curl, running down his back and tickling the scratch marks that paint against his flushed skin. “don’t be sorry,” he adds, pressing a wet kiss near the crook of your neck. “i’m flattered. although, dirty talk isn’t exactly my forte. you know this, my love,” and you moan, feeling the edges of his teeth playfully nibble at your exposed flesh. as pounds of skin resume to smack against each other loudly, nanami slowly lifts up your leg, tossing it over your shoulder. “my favorite part had to be when you said i pulled on your hair ‘n called you a ‘messy whore’ .”

“y- you weren’t supposed to see that,” you nervously grin . . trying to avoid how you were so close to finishing. just a few more thrusts and that was it, you’d be finished, done for. you’ve felt embarrassed before—but never to this extent. he was teasing you, nanami kento was teasing you. and pathetically enough, your pussy twitched as he recited your exact filthy written words. the bed continues to creak and groan as jolting bodies move and move together, amongst each other, and on top of each other.

with kind eyes, nanami watches as you bring both of your hands up to your face, hoping to shield yourself from any more embarrassment.

“oh, honey,” he coos in a melodically low tone. his cock reached so deep that strangled moans flew out from your lips left and right. his tempo was always just right. he never wanted to lose control, but after reading your work, he knew you’d probably like that. crimson damp lips press under your chin before he grunts, preparing himself to be milked dry.

“hngh, don’t hide that pretty face from me,” he huffs, in a soft alluring voice. everything felt abnormally tender, nanami’s softly swerving his body against yours in irregular addictive arcs in such impassioned ardent. the more you stare into your eyes—the more your blown pupils dilate.

once he cup both sides of your face, you lean into his touch. his base was thick, swollen and full. you craved him more than anything, and it’s as if your words were actually coming to life.

“there she is, that’s my girl,” he grits in a raspy voice, prying your hands away from your face. his touch was forevermore gentle. with a soft smile, nanami presses his twitching ruby lips onto yours as you both prepare to cum in euphoric torrent. bedaubing a plump thumb over your bottom quivering lip, he slows his thrusts down a few beats—hearing you vocal pussy’s squelches before a wrinkle of a smile curls against his lips. “now, now. make a mess on your husband’s cock jus how you write them in your little stories, my love.”

GETO ☆

“oh, boo. looks like someone’s innocent all of a sudden when she’s not writing ‘bout dick, hm? wonder why that is,” geto hums, propped right up between your trembly legs. he’s staring at you with a sly smirk that refuses to wipe off his lips. two of his hands spread your thighs apart more before kissing near your slobbering exposed pussy.

with a cunning grin, he gives your drooling folds a few friendly taps as if it was a little mic test. “finish that paragraph. c’mon, wanna make sure ‘m doin’ it right.”

a salty taste of shame fills and salivates inside of your mouth as you watch him with heart shaped pupils. he’s got the most hungry gaze, a bit of spit already dribbling from the thin corners of his lips.

“um, okay,” you moan, picking up your phone again, leisurely dragging a thumb down the neatly typed paragraphs. “it says, ‘you whine, taking s-suguru’s thick fingers happily into your slippery cunt. long digits of his rummage their way inside before curling all around. once suguru spits on your p- pussy, he pats it and calls it a good girl.’ ”

“like this?” geto snickers—copying your exact words, using the flat palm of his hand to rub against your bare clit. you whimper, entirely sensitive as his thick digits toy with your soddened folds. your thighs continue to jostle and shake and he found it so adorable at how you just couldn’t stay still. so cute, he’s got darkened irises focused on you and only you the entire time. these seconds felt like hours, and as he gathers a nice amount of saliva, he spits right on your cunt. just like you wrote it . . you gasp at the sloppy cold saliva cascading down your pussy. the cobwebby strands that pour from his lips had such a pretty glimmer to it. the warm breath of geto that fans against your entrance makes you twitch in elated pleasure.

he’s so sloppy, unapologetically. just like your drabble said—he then pats your cunt with an open palm before leaning right up close, pulling a thumb down your pulsating uvula before licking it passionately. “good fuckin’ girl.”

you whine, your knees practically buckling and he’s just eating your expressions up. “y- yes— like that, fuck,” you move a few long black strands away from his face. geto dips two fingers inside and he stretches you out so easily with his digits. your lips form into a cute ‘o’ shape as you mewl out a desperate cry for more. as he’s watching you succumb into such bliss, he’s got such a pretty face. it makes his dick twitch in his sweats at the thought of you writing about how he goes down on you. the specifics, how sloppy he is, even how he spanks your cunt only to then shamelessly lick the slick mess right up with his tongue.

the thought that probably hundreds of your horny little readers read about this, about him, about his tongue . .

geto’s tongue was ruthless.

he lays it flat against your cunt before fluttering his long black lashes closed. he huskily groans, not even caring that you weren’t reading anymore. as his brows arch into a contorting furrow, he slides in two fat fingers. you whimper at the sudden big yet deliciously enthralling stretch, yanking roughly on his hair. “s . . sugu,” he pulls his slick covered fingers out, licking them clean whilst staring you right in the eyes. you tremor within his hold, feeling his palms tighten its grasp on both of your thighs. you couldn’t lie, this felt a lot better than fiction. so much better . .

he’s making out with your pussy, swirling his tongue around and spelling out all of the letters of his name. creating such a mess, your slick then starts to stream down his chin to which he happily licks it up. groaning, geto then slurps at your drenched hole before giving it yet another kiss. his chin had such luminescent shine to it. you cup his face with shaky hands as he’s eating you out through another orgasm and he jibes.

“mhm, your writing could use a bit more dirty talk though,” he critiques, swiping a thumb against his lips before he spanks your cunt for the umpteenth time.

with your legs sporadically quivering, he playfully bites on your clit, watching you squeal as you’re riding orgasm out on his tongue. “oh, and make sure you add in your little fics that i bite pretty clits too.”

CHOSO ☆

“bottom? w- what’s a bottom?”

choso quirks a brow in cute confusion, slouching back as you’re still getting over your most recent orgasm.

both pounds of sweltering skin melt into each other, sticking together like glue as your hips grow unsteady. choso was reading one of your published works and he can’t help but grow curious. the way you wrote about him, how you portrayed him as whiny and submissive, it does something to him—he personally always thought he was dominant. cute. .

“oh, don’t worry about that, baby,” you timidly utter, trying to conceal an incoming moan once his cock buries its way deep in yet again. he’s nice and snug everyone and it drives him crazy. choso’s got a pout—but it quickly turns into a lewd expression once your sopping pussy swallows him right up again. two jittery hands creep their way onto your rickety hips and he moans once he feels himself already bottoming out. “f- fuck, cho.”

his eyebrows were still all furrowed and he’s got a cute scrunched up expression. “ ‘m not a bottom,” choso grumps, leaning in to sneak a kiss near the corner of your mouth. despite the raspiness lingering underneath his tone—you could hear the incoming whine desperately trying to escape. choso’s black ponytails had cute ribbons in them—by you, and he’s biting his lip at the feeling of your hips starting to grind. “i- i can be dominant too.”

“prove it,” you whisper, a bratty impish glint forming in your eyes. choso scoffs, narrowing his eyes at you but it doesn’t last at all because he’s already pussy drunk to the max.

those two words. . those two words was all it took for him to manhandle you like a rag doll, politely and respectfully tossing you into the springy soft mattress.

it bounces from the abrupt weight crashing down and you gasp once choso backs up his words, and oh, he’s fucking you stupid. you let off a gargled three second moan once choso spanks your ass, using one hand to repeatedly drag you back into his chiseled hips. sharp thrusts plow into you with such speed that you’re left with a dumbfounded expression. your eyes were rolling back and your tongue was lolled out as choso was fucking you in doggy.

as much as you write about him, he doesn’t like doggy, mainly because he can’t see your pretty face. it kills him—but he can’t deny that the view of you like this was so pretty, so enticing. your buckling knees lock as you’re cupping a hand over your mouth, eyes practically bulging out of their sockets.

choso’s cock was so weighty and thick that it’s got a lazy curve, a mean curve that makes itself known in every part of your insides. he’s no stranger to your body, he knows the exact layout. such stamina—you didn’t expect him to be so feral, it’s as if he was an entire different person. “fuck, fuuuck,” he throws his head back, giving your ass more and more hard spanks. the recoil was his favorite. it was just the way your pretty shaped ass would bounce back onto him. he’s in love with love, in love with your pussy, in love with you. “ngh, gotta show you ‘m not a bottom, baby.”

“c- choso,” you whimper, and his fat base swings against your ass, almost shocking you from the electric friction. you’re drooling—he’s got you stupid as your swollen chaste clit bumps up against his pelvis every single time. the bed hollers out a plethora of cries as he’s jerking more and more into you. your cunt’s drooling dewy slick all down the undersides of your thighs. you even make an attempt at trying to touch yourself. with slickness though, choso snatches your wrist away.

“no baby. ‘s my pussy,” he grumbles, pinning an arm behind your back. you’re babbling—squatting forward as he’s feeding your needy pussy with such inches. choso hisses at the brief twinges of pleasure all due to your sloppy grip. you’re brutal, wetting up his base with your dewy slick. he can’t help but stare and gawk at the way your ass presses up against him. choso’s bottom lip quivers at how good it feels and how good you feel. no matter how much of a front he puts up, he’s gonna whine. “f- fuck. teasin’ me with your hips, baby. so mean.”

yet as he’s dragging you back and forth, watching as your chest heaving and your thighs try to clamp inward—you abruptly cum, gushing all over choso’s cock. he huffs at how sudden it was, and he knew you didn’t expect it in the slightest. so pretty, your final orgasmic cries sounded like a sweet candied harmony and he could feel your quavering body breaking down with his shaft still shoved deeply inside. your mess soaks up the entirety of the dark sheet, now being drenched in a damp grey color. “fuck, fuck,” you whimper, shaking as your head slumps into the pillow. choso whines at your own pleasure, and he doesn’t even care if he doesn’t finish. he pulls out, crawling toward you before burying his face into the nook of your neck. “c- choso, oh my g- god.”

as your flimsy arms hold him close, accepting his embrace, he goes back to his clingy needy self again, speaking in a shivering soft voice. “h- have you ever wrote about squirting yet?”

with droopy eye lids, you were longing for a kiss. as if he read your mind, he leans in—planting a sultry balmy kiss right onto your lips. “no,” you mumble, moving a few strands out of his face.

choso licks near your neck, one of his hands sprawling your sticky legs apart and he brushes a finger against your slick wet cunt. “w- well, you can always write about that,” and you gasp once he lifts your leg up, easily tossing it over his shoulder. with pleading eyes, choso sighs. “but, can we do that again, baby? i- i think i like when you squirt on me.”

SUKUNA ☆

“breeding kink, interesting,” the demon gruffs, hearing you whine after he swipes his phone from your hand, wondering what in the actual hell could be so important.

he’s reading a strange explicit story of himself that’s apparently called a ‘one shot,’ according to you. how stupid, he thinks. sukuna’s irked vermillion-shot eyes skim through the many paragraphs of filth before he spanks your ass, making you keep your most recent arch.

“ah, seems like y’r even more nasty than i thought,” and your breath hitches once he circles a palm over your stinging rear cheek— an attempt at soothing the sudden pang. hearing your cute muffled whimpers, he mocks your noises. “aw, if you wanted me to ‘breed’ you princess, you could have just asked.”

“ ‘kuna, ‘s embarrassing,” you moan, gasping once he smears his leaky tip against your entrance. he was right - you could’ve ask, you could have asked him to do all the little dirty things you wrote about, you could have . .

swallowing the invisible lump that resides at the roof of your mouth, you imagine yourself being stuffed full of sukuna’s cum. so much to where he ends up getting you all swollen—you’d be nothing but sitting pretty with a cute plump tummy, wads and wads of glossy runny cum just slickly dribbling down the sides of your ass and thighs.

“write like a slut ‘n you even act like one too,” he hums, using a thumb to slide down your pussy. sukuna’s staring openly at how you’re already so soaked, so drenched and he looks like he’s ready to feast. your puffy folds glisten with your own arousal and it’s so so cute. “wonder if you write while havin’ a pussy this sloppy too,” and he smacks it raw, feeling your entire body jolt from the sudden impact. you fall into the soft padded mattress and he darkly chuckles at your weakly spot-on reaction time, aligning himself. “poor baby. spendin’ all this time writing when you could’ve been getting . . ah, what’s the word? oh, right. bred, heh.”

and sukuna does more than just breed you—he quite literally overflows your cunt. he’s a demon, and demons cum a lot.

you’re an entire puddled mess that was filled to the brim.

the sheets were all damp and stained and you’re glistening with droplets of perspiration—radiating from his heat entirely. “s- sukuna, fuck,” you weep out his name, hearing the sloppy spurts of cum still dribbling out of you. such a mess, your mouth waters as you realize just how full you are. you always wrote about this sort of thing but never knew that your silly fiction could turn into mere reality. both of your thighs stick together as you’re left trembling with an arch in your back. he’s cackling at your state, watching as globs of creamy ropes leak out of your slobbering pussy.

“how cute, jus might mess around ‘n get you pregnant, yeah,” the demon jibes, a sharp fang poking underneath his bottom lip. you’re haplessly quivering. your panties that were lazily dragged to the side were all torn and ripped, coated in a ivory white color also. as you’re trying to collect breaths—you then let off a moan once he presses himself deep against you.

your womb was completely flooded, you’re drowning with his stringy cum and with his hot burly body right up against you, you feel him right there. you couldn’t miss it, he’s so long and thick that he’s practically tickling your goopy insides. sukuna wraps a hand around your throat whilst another hand sneaks toward your pussy. “bet you’d like that, fuckin’ freak,” and he’s smearing circles against your folds. you twitch at his cursed hand, his cock still tucked inside of you before he laughs against your ear. “you want a baby, huh. wanna carry my demon babies, don’t ya princess?”

you nod and he lets off a snicker of amusement. “keh. bet you do,” and his voice lowly pitches. you moan, feeling him pull out of your dripping cunt, plugging his spilling cum back in with a single thumb. “fuck, better write about this too, princess. let all your pathetic readers know how much of a sloppy pussy their favorite author has,” and you gasp once he quickly flips you over. sukuna suddenly dives head first between your legs, lapping his flick tongue against your folds. “mmph, now watch me clean you up,” and he spits on your pussy only to then look at it with disgust. “messy girl.”

TOJI ☆

“nuh uh, get the fuck back here babygirl,” he grabs you by the hip, and you let off a moan once his fingers trail up your skirt. a wavering crinkle prods near the edge of his left twitching eye as he’s processing such raunchy words about him. a dry chortle leaves from toji’s mouth as he makes you lie on your tummy, multitasking by slapping his swollen cockhead on your dribbling folds. “ya always told me you were a writer but i didn’t think you write ‘bout this,” he purrs, and your toes curl once he’s aligning himself against your slick heat. but fuck was your cunt just was drooling for him. both folds were weeping for him to just go in already, and yet here he was - teasing you. “really? what’s with the whole ‘toji daddy kink’ thing? i look like the kinda guy that’s into that?”

you feel embarrassment creep up your shoulder. he was reading that part, the part where reader calls him ‘daddy.’

sheepishly trying to crawl away from his grasp, you swallow ignominy. “ ‘s not real, i just made it up toji,” you try to explain through gritted teeth. but as he’s reeling you back into his keen structed hips, you lewdly mewl. he’s just so fucking big, happily massaging your walls freely with just a few inches. your mouth widens as you hear him lowly snickering in the background. a snickering laugh that never failed to make your pussy throb.

toji grabs at the fat of your ass, stubby fingertips poking through your skin. with a mean spank, it’s a non-verbal sign for you to stay still. “y’er a fuckin’ slut with your writing, baby. i bet ya haven’t even tried these kinks,” he teases, and you moan again once his cock delves deeper into your walls. with such ease, you back raises up into an even sluttier arch. “hm, lets see if y’er as nasty as you write,” and you hear him grunt briefly, one of his hands gently wrapping around your neck. toji gets right up close to your ear, flicking his tongue against your soft earlobe. “go on, say it.”

“s- say what?” you squeak, but you knew exactly what he wanted. never in a million years would you have thought toji would discover your little erotic hobby. by now, he’s balls deep—you whine, feeling yet another sharp swat smack against your left ass cheek at the lack of response. you’re chewing on the inside of your cheek in guilt before you hear toji smack his lips in sheer vex.

“c’mon, don’t get shy on me now,” he murmurs in a hoarse tone, salacious timbre pouring on his entire voice. toji feels your pussy dripping around him and he hums, giving you just one single tease of a thrust. your body jerks forward and you whimper sweetly. he’s so close up to you, hard washboard abs of his that were proudly flexing grinds against your back. he’s pressing his muscular weight onto you, careful not to crush you but just enough to. inching his lips back toward your ear, he kisses near your neck. “call me daddy. jus like how you write me, little girl.”

as you’re feeling a few throbbing pangs between your thighs, you shiver underneath him. burying your head in shame between your arms, you whine. “ngh, daddy,” and a weird feeling pools around the insides of your stomach. butterflies and a mixture of flutters swarm inside of you and you moan. once those words slip past your lips so prettily, toji raspily groans. he pistons his hips before not even seconds later, he’s fucking you stupid. babbles of babbles leave from you, and you’re acting just like the main character you write for. ironic, you’re clinging onto the silky cream-colored sheets, bawling up the thinly-made fabric with your clammy fists before squealing. “fuck, daddy ‘m not gonna last.”

“should hear how stupid you fuckin’ sound, baby,” he growls, merciless hips snapping into you at full throttle. you were gonna break, you just knew it. toji’s thrusts were so powerful that you’re left squeaking out pathetic whimpers—his cock stretching you out as if you were elastic. “fuck,” he runs a hand through his messy dark tresses. his shaggy strands were unkempt, overgrown a bit and running down his eyes. he’s got to cock his head up a bit just to see your pretty face and your even prettier ass. “c’monnn, do that cute arch you describe in y’r slutty fics.”

“t- tojiii,” you whimper, the weight of the bed dipping after each continuous stroke. he’s thorough. toji’s maddened fat tip has your legs becoming more and more unstable before he smacks your ass. the powerful hit against your rear rings through each of your ears—and you pout, gnawing on your lip, knowing he wants you to correct yourself. “ngh, i- i mean daddy. ‘m gonna cum, fuck.”

but right when you’re about to finish, you’re interrupted by the ear-splitting sound of wood. you’re moaning—feeling your pussy continue to squeeze around his throbbing length that’s coated with veins all the way down to the tan swollen base. it’s loud, you gasp once the weight of the springy bed suddenly drops and you both collapse—toji falling on top of you. he doesn’t even say anything, and he pulls you up to continue fucking you but you let off a whiny whimper. “you just broke my b-bed.”

“yeah, so.”

“so..? you’re gonna have to buy me a new one.”

“right. about that . .”

[sergeantjessi]

HAPPY BLOGAVERSARY SARGE

Omgggg it's dotgif [SWOONER]

Tbh I completely forgot about my blogaversary, so seeing this message just made me stare at the screen for an embarrassing long time until it clicked. (It's been a few weeks since I queued this post LOL)

Anyways thank youuuuu <3 What a surprise fr fr

(hehe finally i can reverse gif you)

[eepywriters]

dating younger quackity? like 2018-2019

.✦°. • Dating younger Quackity ( ´∀｀)

warnings: none^^

a/n: thank u so much for the request! This was super fun to write, took me back to 2019 when I started watching him :D either way hope you enjoy! (Sorry it took so long 😭 life’s been busy)

I feel like he’d be the type to fall in love with his best friend, or generally someone that he knows fairly well

Expect nights spent talking on the phone with him, laughing your asses off at memes and stupid games instead of doing homework

Or endless bike rides around the city, as if you didn’t do that one route million of times

Maybe even little lessons on the basics of boxing (he isn’t a very good teacher though, he’s too afraid to hurt you)

It comes naturally, his heartbeat starts to pick up every time he hears your voice, your laugh, you saying his name ugh

And you won’t stop leaving his mind, you’re always there, in every each one of his thoughts (might as well pay rent at this point)

Have you always sound this pretty?

Have you always been this pretty?

Before he knows it, he’s noticing all the little details that make you, well, YOU

He’s in love.

Fuck.

He wouldn’t know what to do about his feelings, either he ignores them and buries this secret deep into his heart, or, after a scary amount of convincing from his friends, he confronts you with the shyest demeanor you’ve ever seen him wear

Assuming this is one of his first experiences, if not the first, he would be very cautious in his actions, not sure yet about how to handle a relationship, especially if it gets more serious

He wouldn’t talk about being in a romantic relationship for a while, mostly cause he doesn’t like to share his personal life too much, especially when it comes to romance

But is there a teenage boy that doesn’t like to brag about being in a relationship?

Would mention it once, casually, you know, to be cool and all

Like “yeah I have a partner” a little smile to top it off, nothing big, just a bit of something to feel swag

Nobody believed him.

The loud boy who screamed about the president 24/7 having a partner? Yeah nice try kiddo, go back to play your stupid videogames

At some point in his young carrier he got tired about the running joke of you being an illusion

“This is what too much screen time does to a person KEKW” chat would say, haha how funny (if you hadn’t notice, he’s being sarcastic)

As frustrating as it was to battle against hundreds of people on whether HE was in a relationship or not, he’d never ask you to do anything you are uncomfortable in doing

So, even if showing up on stream would probably help with this little problem of his, he’d encourage you to actually think carefully if you want to make an appearance or not

“I do have a partner!” Alex says for what feels like the fiftieth time that evening. He should probably give up, after all who cares if chat doesn’t believe him. He knows the truth and that’s enough. Right?

WRONG.

His credibility, and his pride, are in the way. Plus is he even that bad of a catch for people to think he can’t pull?

His head falls onto his hand, resting there as he lets his thoughts run while the fast stream chat on his monitor lights up his face in various dull colors.

You were sitting on a little chair, not too far away from him, staring at something in your phone. He did feel bad for inviting you over just for him to stream an hour later, but you had always said that you didn’t mind watching him since you liked seeing him do something he enjoyed. As if he didn’t enjoy spending time with you, but fine.

So he put his insecurities aside, most of them being about you possibly not liking his streams, and provided you a chair to at least sit comfortably as he robbed you of your time by going live yet again.

It had been going fairly well: he was checking out some horrible games in Roblox, or rather he had been screaming his lungs out for an hour straight, and of course, when a random kid on Roblox asked him to be his girlfriend, chat got back on their “no relationship, you are a loser” (he knows it’s a long name, he couldn’t come up with anything better okay??) agenda.

Your hand waving in his peripheral vision brought him back from his mind: he hadn’t realized he had zoned out.

He looked at you briefly, almost feeling bad for the worried stare you were giving him. He usually doesn’t feel this defeated after an unserious bickering with chat, but to say that this all situation wasn’t playing with his self-doubts would be lying. He’s fine though, he just feels a little gloomy today.

You turn your head to the side and give him a thumps up, voicelessly asking whether he was fine or not. And he just nods, giving you a little, forced, smile before going back to the bright monitor. He doesn’t like the thought of you being concerned about this. While, admittedly, it does feel nice to have someone worried about him, Alex never quite liked to be a bother to anyone. He could handle this alone.

Then why is his head so heavy? And why does he feel without energy all of a sudden? He just needs to do what he does best: push the pain away and walk forward. But even something as easy as that sounds impossible right now.

Maybe he should end stream.

He’s too lost in his own thoughts to realize you had stood from your chair, steadily approaching his setup. When he realizes what’s going on, it’s too late.

“You don’t-“ before the frantic words can leave his mouth, you were already behind him. You cross your arms down his chest, whilst your head, resting on the top of his beanie, being high enough to not get seen by the webcam.

Many things were going trough Alex’s mind, a lot of them being about how nice it felt being hold by you, but only two words left his lips:

“Who’s got no game now, huh?”.

At that point it would go from chat not believing him to chat teasing him endlessly about him being a simp

You two could do nothing and he would still be accused of it, just because you were there

Is it true? Yeah, but it was nonetheless a bit annoying

He WOULD bully you on stream when the secret is out

Chat: “do you like (Name) or Thanos more? Don’t lie”

“Well…” he’d say, scratching his neck in faux uneasiness.

“Don’t think about it what the fuck!”.

His chat took your relationship quite well, after all the time he wasn’t famous enough to have fans being jealous and obsessing over him

Actually you became kind of an icon of his channel

And he did milk this for content but it’s not like you didn’t encourage him, quite the contrary, so expect videos like “playing Roblox with my partner” or “The best Habbo raid ever w/(Name)”

As sweet as this all can be, we haven’t forgot about his light teasing (borderline bullying) on stream, have we?

Don’t worry, you got back at him with the help of Aksel countless of time, he’d be your partner in crime when it came to bullying Alex

You were watching meme compilations with them on stream, occasionally sharing some little laughs and snarky comments, and, one way or another, you somehow ended up talking about shampoos. Yes, shampoos.

“Honestly, I think 2 in 1 are gross” Alex says, spinning around in his chair while still keeping an eye on the running chat. You were sitting next to him in your usual simple wooden chair that he usually stole from his kitchen. It wasn’t much, and you could feel your thighs getting painted with the hard design of your seat, but it feels very homy, heart warming in its simplicity.

Yet, as comfortable and happy as you felt, you really couldn’t help spatting out the comment that had been dancing dangerously on the tip of your tongue, begging to be freed.

“And what would you know about it you bald fuck”.

Silence filled the room.

.

.

.

You start to grow worried you stepped over the line as you shoot guilty side-glances at him, trying to evaluate whether he was or wasn’t okay with your stupid joke. His spinning was getting gradually slower, and his eyes wide and open jaw came to view.

You’re able to let out a silent sigh of relief as Alex’s face sinks into a, clearly exaggerated, offended pout.

“Have you heard them?? Defend me Aksel what the hell” he cries dramatically, his mindless spinning coming at a halt to stare into the soul of his screen, specifically at the man that is lightly grinning right back at him.

“I mean.. they’re kinda right man..” he mutters in his typical monotone voice, barely holding back an amused snicker.

Alex’s look of betrayal was probably the funniest shit you had seen in a while.

“Why are you two ganging up on a Mexican guy huh??”

“Awww the Mexican card? No better come back??” you laugh smugly, your face screaming “triumph” as he gawks at you.

“You truly found your match” Aksel laughs, adjusting his bucket hat as he leaned down on his office chair.

“Shut the fuck up” he mumbles before looking away from you with a huff.

Oh God does he love you.

Moving on though, these were harsh years for him, so he needs lots of love and support from his partner

I think it’d be too soon to have full on cuddling sessions, but i see him loving your touch, especially if it’s something domestic like a simple hug or a little caress down his back

Not really into PDA either, but he would find comfort in holding your hand whenever he’s tense or even just cold

It’s a reminder you are still by his side despite all of his flaws and insecurities, you chose him

(Ended up being way longer than I intended but had fun :D sorry for the long wait :( I had two very stressing weeks in the middle of writing this)

[zackcharine]

You sent me Beefer what about Pico KEKW

YAAAY THE GUYYY

• favorite thing about them: tbh its kinda hard to not just say Everything JDHDHDH i like his issues,, even if they probably just were added to him for edge im also a psychosis haver and seeing that on a character i love so much makes me so happy.. I also like how he tries sooo hard to be Serious and distant but he will never beat the silly dumb guy that cares a lot allegations

• least favorite thing about him: I dont think that theres something i dont like that comes like. directly from him... this is just me bitching but im not a fan of when people try to make him all macho and angry and agressive all the time,,, he can feel other emotions guys,,, (<- this isnt directed at anyone and its gladly something i dont see often anymore!) Ive also seen some very poor handling/demonization of his schizophrenia and it makes me The Sadge... but again this isnt something ive seen since leaving twitter LMFAO

• favorite line:

This makes me laugh so hard every time JDJDHDH

• brOTP: i like them romantically too but i really like his relationships with Darnell and Nene too :] I'm a big NGtrio fan

• OTP: RGB !!!! THEY MAKE ME ILL,,,, /VPOS

• nOTP: i dont like picass.. no hate to anyone who does ofc, this is just a personal thing

• random headcanon: AUGH i have so many djdhdhd but i also few like i dont have anything new/interesting to bring to the table,,

But i think he unconsciously associates weight with comfort/safety bc of his guns and how hes been carrying him all the time since he was 13... i wanna do this to him

I also think he used to be a datahoarder when he was younger.. i think his computer his completely filled with flash games/stuff JZHHDHD

• unpopular opinion: scratches my head,,, i honestly dont know djdhdgd

• song i associate with them: AAGHH i suck at assigning songs to characters unfortunally..

I already said that this is a very RGB song to me, but when i listen to it i mostly see it from his point of view !

This one is more loose but it also reminds me of him

• favorite picture of them:

I love the way mindchamber draws him,,,

Not one picture but.. him baiting Darnell and instantly getting punched is just. wonderful JDJDHDHGD i also love how he looks on the weekend 1 cutscenes in general... hes so stupid

[johnnysuhbmarine]

the EMOTIONAL ROLLERCOASTER of the last few chapters 😭

i’m living for the boys rallying around hyuck tho, and i actually understand where y/n is coming from despite wanting to yell at her 🤣

also we got the fic name drop 🥳🥳 love those

Lmaoooo yeah I had a nice, fun start and then made the last few chapters ABSOLUTE HELL 💀 but hopefully that ends now with today’s chapters hehehehe.

But honestly so glad you gave me this review because I was PRAYING that it would make sense and flow for the boys to be on hyuck’s side now but ALSO that y/n was at least somewhat understandable. I was like “yeah I see where she’s coming from” and then realized that I wrote the character based on MY dumb brain so I was like “oh maybe this won’t fly for emotionally stable people” but ITS OKAY YIPPEE

But yeah I literally was forming that hyuck text and felt like the coolest person in the world referencing my title kekw

[queenharumiura]

👍👌 ;)

[👍👌 ask the mun what they think about portrayals/you (the sending mun)] ||Accepting|| @voraxiia

Let's see... my opinion on your muses/portrayals... can't speak on portrayals because they're all OCs, so it's not like I can judge portrayals based off accuracy by any means, but I certainly can say a thing or two about the characters themselves-- I can try to, anyways.

From recollection, the muses of yours that have appeared on my blog are: Xiao Yao, Dalbar, Miceli, and Luca in order of least interaction to the most.

Xiao Yao isn't on your current roster list, and this was like 4 years ago so unfortunately I don't really remember much about him aside from the fact that he was tall and blond so Haru mistook him for Dino from behind kekeke.

Dalbar seems to be a cute lil dude. A lil quiet, but I do have a certain soft spot for that //motions to some of her silent/less talkative muses. He gave me the feel of an obedient guard/attack dog or something. I feel like he's just someone who would grow on me because like-- he might be the same height as me, and he just seems to be a good natured lil dude. Ignore the fact he's an assassin, HE GUD BOI!

Miceli-- my immediate thought when I think about him is: GRRRRRRR what kind of evollll will he invoke on Haru this time? Is he going to be mean to her and say something sarcastic? Maybe he'll just piss her off somehow gr grrrrrrr. Of course, this isn't to mean that I dislike him, I find him fun. It's amusing having someone who irritates Haru in the Varia verse- and that's mostly anyone. Miceli is starting to grow on her though with the repeated interactions and such. He may be rude to her at times, by saying sarcastic things, but he has moments of showing some level of interest/concern for her? Though, Haru can tell that he's not really interested in her in a way that matters. She gets the feel that he has interest in the way that a scientist does when performing an experiment and something goes wrong and he goes ??? I can relate. //Sad and annoyed chemist noises. As his lil bio blurb says, he is a mysterious one, and the air of his mystery is maintained well. It's a lil harder for me to get a grasp on him as a character, and I think that's what makes it interesting and yet difficult to write with him at times, as I'm not really sure who he is to understand him kekekek. A fun puzzle!

Luca, MY SWEET BOI. WHO I BASICALLY HAVE PARTIAL CUSTODY OVER AT THIS POINT. I adore him very much. MY LIL BBUUUUU!!!! I do know that he's a pretty complex kinda guy and that he has his... issues, but he does do his best! He's been through things and I just want to give him a BIIIIIG hug! He's not allowed to get hurt! The only kinda pain I'll accept is forehead flicks and 'oh look I just killed Haru/Ravein because I wanna see the world burn!!!' 8D Alas... Blaise is a coward and won't let me hurt Haru/Ravein (1000% joking). I think i've seen him absolutely lose it maybe once or twice in the years that we've known each other and I enjoyed it thoroughly. Ehehe~ It's my secret aim to not only get to know him better through interactions/memes but to also make him snap again. I LOVE to see variation in behaviors, so making him snap is a treat. Of course, I still love gud boi Luca who is a pair with the other 'dumber' Ravein. Haru truly has so much to deal with whenever the trio gets together kekw. He is the only one aside from Tenka's Bel and my OC Ravein that Haru feels comfortable with. She's actually affectionate towards all 3 and cares for them. Anyone else, it's just Eh- you exist and I don't really care for you much. He just has the kind of personality that meshes well enough with her that it sparks her protective instinct and the doting energy that Haru has to have regardless of the verse. I love him for that.

-----------------------------------------------------------

How I feel about Blaise--

HELLO MY SWEET!

MY DARLING BLAISE!

We've known each other for years now and though interactions have been on and off during those years, we did still talk OOC quite a bit. So, I feel like, I'd be comfortable in saying yeeeee we friends outside of RPC.

Time differences are truly the bane, however. We both work, and with the field that you're in, it's understandable that you aren't always online or have the bandwidth to talk much.

STILL! The moments you are able to sit down and talk, you've always been just the sweetest lil bean.

I don't think I've ever admitted this to you before--- but better late than never AMIRITE? So we've been mutuals with each other for quite a while now even if it was rather on and off. From my recollection, we were mutuals but didn't really start interacting with eachother until a while into our friendship, likely due to schedules being really busy and what not.

It was also a time when you kept jumping from one blog to another blog so it was a lil hard to keep up with you at times. STILL, the main point is regardless of how many times you've jumped blogs (and you and I both know there's been a number of that over the years), you always did follow me consistently and that's always meant a lot to me.

I've hinted at things here and there in meme answers or conversations i've had with people but I've never actually sat down and spoke about it. I've come extremely close to quitting KHR RPC twice. The first time was when I first joined the RPC (back in like 2014-2015) and it was just... a time. I was feeling really discouraged and there were... incidents that occurred that really hurt me. I'd feel like such a waste of space, or that no one actually cared. If anyone did, it was because of the friends I had (I somehow got along with the Hibari's of the fandom lololol sigh).

Both of them aren't really online anymore but Emi/Emiko and Kiril were the two who I stuck around for. Both of them consistently stayed by my side and enjoyed writing with Haru. They both consistently wrote with me whenever they were able to and enjoyed indulging in my shenanigans. Both of them have left the KHR RPC for a while now.

I came close to leaving again like... a little bit before or at the very start of the pandemic time. We were ALL going through it, honestly. We were all struggling, but it was around that time when the KHR RPC was really really small and I'd gotten out of a really bad time with an RP group that left me with a bit of trauma that took me years to process and get over.

It was hard, because I was going through panic attacks somewhat frequently, and I would occasionally get anon hate- which obviously- isn't very conducive to me conjuring the desire to stick around.

The actual point of all this, is that you're actually one of the reasons why I stuck around. Even though you were struggling and you were having a hard time with life and feeling insecure/unwanted/unneeded/etc you were still trying. It was in a way uplifting to see the fact that you were trying hard even if things were a struggle. You would also talk to me and were in general very kind. I think around this time is where you were really jumping around blogs a lot (I think you were avoiding someone or something like that), but again you still consistently followed me on whichever blog you migrated to.

It really truly meant so much to me at the time when I was feeling so godawful. My old job really-- it was a time. I wasn't in a good place mentally and emotionally. It was you and Emi (the other Emi who is on heartsglass now) who were the reasons I stuck around the 2nd time I got REAL CLOSE to quitting RPC. It may not seem like much, but I always appreciated the fact that you both would follow me, like my OOC posts and sometimes leave replies.

It may seem like such a small and simple thing, but a lot of my OOC posts go unseen. It was quite often that I wouldn't get any likes on my OOC posts or replies. It was exceedingly rare for me to even get asks for memes. I don't think i've mentioned it really but that's the other reason why I don't like memes. Aside from the fact I have trauma associated with the inbox that i'm healing from, I have the mindset of 'no one is going to send in because I write boring responses lol why do I bother reblogging memes lolololol'

But you especially would surprise me by sheer coincidence on the days I was feeling down with a like, a reply, or a meme ask. Emi was the same. By sheer coincidence you both would be a notification on the days I'd think 'maybe I should delete because no one will notice when i'm gone'.

I've never admitted it to you both, but you both are the reasons why I stuck it through during the pandemic years when I was struggling so hard mentally. It's the small stuff that can mean the world to someone.

So whenever I'm in your replies saying that I care for you, love you, and just in general love seeing you on the dash-- EVER, I truly mean it. You're existence made a big impact on this blog by the sheer principle that you helped me have hope that I can exist on this platform and be appreciated.

This is probably the reason why I'm so attached to both Luca and Emi, because idk... I just feel like both of those OCs mean a lot to the both of you and so I just instinctively latched on. Like I imprint the love I have for the both of you onto those muses AHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAAH. I'm being real sappy.

So you know, TLDR: Thank you for existing. Without your existence, I wouldn't be on tumblr today. Anyone who enjoys writing with me now has you and Emi to thank for me not quitting during the pandemic years.

Thanks for everything and I truly just love seeing you on the dash ever. It makes me so happy to see you continue to try.

[ashinaisshin]

A more direct EN translation of some of Alhaitham’s voice lines in CN

(Note that in order to show the meaning in CN more clearly, some translations might not sound as smooth as the official EN text to stay closer to the CN.)

tl;dr: dude is in general more of a piece of shit in CN (no) LOL

i love he

About the Vision

To be honest, a Dendro Vision isn’t of much help to my research. But I do hit people harder now that I have elemental powers, so it's still useful enough.

[Personal opinion: I really wish the translators had kept his cruder/rougher wording in CN here, instead of making him sound kinda formal with the “settling a physical dispute” “proves useful at times” and all. (There are other lines, including some during the archon quest, where I’ve noticed that the EN translators made him sound more “formal” like this.) Despite the strong “rational/logical” image that he has, in CN Alhaitham rarely uses the kind of “academic” or “smart”-sounding language that one might think he does unless the occasion calls for it, and I find that aspect of his character really charming. Like Alhaitham says himself, “Rather than lacing my words with rhetoric, I prefer speaking factually” – I love hearing his lines because this guy is so good at making sharp, concise comments using his iconic crude and down-to-earth language. The writers really did a fantastic job portraying this smart and badass and hilarious character while intentionally (imo) breaking the stereotype in the use of an “academic” tone.]

About Us: Helping Each Other

You are very capable of taking care of yourself, so much so that you can even look after the companions around you. I don’t have any advice for you, and you most likely don’t need my help.

[Unlike in EN, it’s not very obvious that he is specifically referring to Paimon there in CN. It’s also a general trend that he is more curt/direct in CN, not hedging his statements as much with words like “seem” “frankly” “tend to” etc..]

About Kaveh: Compassion

He shows too much compassion towards everyone and everything. Probably because he is too fragile, he’s always making a fuss over nothing.

[The word choice in CN is more positive. At least “关怀” is a positive word – more along the lines of “compassion/care” – while “sensitive” is a neutral word that could be understood in either way, and probably negative in the context of “overly sensitive”. While Alhaitham is arguably also using some sarcasm in CN, I still think “sensitive” is neither an intuitive nor a fitting translation for 关怀.]

Birthday

Happy birthday. I’ve always thought that people invest an unnecessary amount of enthusiasm into celebrating the day they were born; it’d be more practical to channel that energy into getting more joy out of each day of their lives. You’re doing an alright job with this. I don’t know what kind of gift to get, so I’ll just reserve one pass for you through a special application channel.

[Funnily enough, he is less nice to you on your birthday in CN lol… I appreciate the sheer objectivity in “alright job”, bro Especially the “gift” he prepared for you, in my understanding, the special channel is only effective for once in CN and not permanent as the EN version seems to suggest, LMAO. Alhaitham, you just really don’t want to put extra effort into this huh Idk, maybe the EN translators just wanted to make him sound nicer to the players 😆 I can appreciate it either way though.]

Opening Treasure Chest: I

Hold on to them yourself.

[Aka: I don’t need this stuff. How nice of him.]

Opening Treasure Chest: II

Hurry, it’ll be hard to pick them up once they roll away.

[But he’s also genuinely being such a good (and fourth-wall-breaking-ly helpful) teammate kekw]

Joining Party: II

Let’s do business the business way. / Let’s keep things straight business.

[OK, if all the other discrepancies in translation are mostly just me being nitpicky, this one, I would argue, is a significant mistranslation that almost gets the opposite meaning across. “Let’s get down to business,” in my opinion, makes it sound like Alhaitham feels the need and is potentially quite willing to join the party, while in CN, “公事公办” is an idiom that clearly conveys the meaning that Alhaitham is Not joining you because he wants to/thinks he needs to but rather he’s treating it as Business, as a Job. In JP this line is straight up translated it as “公務に私情は挟まない” – “no personal feelings involved in official business.” In fact, linguistic elegance/cultural factors aside, I feel like for Alhaitham’s voice lines at least, the JP translation in general stays much closer to the CN text compared to EN. Like I mentioned in my last CN/EN comparison post, some EN translations make Alhaitham sound like a leader, while a big part of this dude’s life is just rejecting any and all leadership responsibilities thrown his way.]

---

Some additional translations FYI

More About Alhaitham: IV

Once order is disrupted, the consequences will spread rapidly. I don’t like this; it will get in the way of the life I have right now.

Feelings About Ascension: Conclusion

Can’t let those slackers from the Akademiya know that I’m making progress yet again, otherwise they’ll do everything in their ability to push trouble my way. Of course I won’t accept any of it, but the back-and-forth in communication is always going to waste some (of my) time.

Low HP: III

This will take up more (of my) time.

[poltergeist-coffee]

Alright, a0 is the federation base(that's the word?) But yeah, the feathers probaly have something to do with the avians because is much of a coincidence that Jaiden and Baghera got wings very recently and Cellbit got a puzzle about feathers at the same time But yeah, to this day we still haven't get lore of that thing on Felps' arm Perhaps some sort of sleeper agent? Like, but like, unconciosly?(I don't know how to write that and I too lazy to look) or maybe it's from an experiment? Back then people were considering the chance of him turning into a cucurucho Also, I think Cellbit might not be Bagi's brother, but is funny on how people just look at them say: "yeah, sibling" But would be funny if it was the most random person in this island and everyone is like "HOW??"

And Cellbit stopped solving the enigma and now is ranking cartoons He spend way too long on that thing LOL About the gods hc, do you have any hc about them?

-Plate anon, who one day will ascend to the land of emojis

Philza also has wings!! no model but he was telling his chat yesterday that they’re behind his backpack/tucked away and the federation clipped them. he had to wear a backpack otherwise he’ll lose balance because he’s so use to the extra weight of his full wings :((

i’ve seen almost everyone be a candidate to being bagi’s brother MKAMHIVINAKMA i think it makes the most sense for it to be cellbit BUT if it was someone else entirely random like Foolish i’d still love it. id laugh very hard at it

OOOH GOD HEADCANONS YOU SAY?? >:3c

Tommyinnit is a deity that phil, wilbur and tubbo all know about (tommy has been in tubbos stream before being shown around tubbos new qsmp base + another time he was on call with philza and wilbur when they were playing qsmp)

To me he’s a silly little chaos and life deity. he’s busy a lot of the time but he does make sure to look out for his family and see what they’re up too at times :))

I really like the idea that all the gods/goddesses know each other lamknfkns

like imagine Mumza (Philza’s wife), Forever’s partner and Missa’s partner all talkign to each other about their silly partners in the server

like Kari apologizing for Forever behavior with Philza but Mumza just laughs because she thinks it’s funny and cry ally encourages it

Missa’s partner has to watch him try and water bucket clutch and utterly fail at least three times a day

OOOOH MINE!! HOW COUDL I FORGET HER!! i think she’s a goddess of creativity? i don’t remember what specifically but i know she crochets a lot

she and slime’s gf crochet together while taking about their partners who are both brothers!! they didn’t know before but now they do so they try and get along together :DD

slime’s gf actually makes her own yarn and gardens a lot so i think she’s make very special yarn and stuff for Mine :))

oh i really like Lore blessing Richas to be her cupid which is why all the ships he like usually work (biggest example being q!guapoduo kekw)

[starlit-bawka]

20 Questions For Fanfic Writers!

No way I got tagged by the really awesome @h4mm132l1c3, and ill tag a couple of other people too probably

1: How many works do you have on Ao3?

Currently I've got 59 things on AO3!! There are a couple more on my long-defunct wattpad though, and I've got a bunch of December whump I need to catch up on too so there will be more

2: What's your total Ao3 word count?

72,774!! Wow!!! And like...90% of that is oneshots! Go me!

3: What fandoms do you write for?

Currently writing for DSMP and QSMP the most atm :O I also write for the PJO fandom, Homestuck, and DR on occasion, too. I get very tempted to write for Stardew Valley and Scott Pilgrim, and I have been. More than tempted to write CareBears stuff too. I'm in deep chat

4: Top five fics by kudos?

(Un)Lifetime Achievement Award, Take Your Secret Son to Work Day, Las Nevadas and the Frozen Fox, Alone I Began, and Of Lost Gods!

5: Do you respond to comments? Why/Why not?

For the most part yeah! I don't get too too much interaction and I just get!! So excited when I get comments! I love seeing what people say and I love to respond! But sometimes I don't, often cause I don't know what to say lol

6: What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

hmmm,,,good question! Probably Why Do I Cry? or maybe Famous Last Words? Gone are the Joys I Knew? I don't really know! I write a lot of sort of mopey sad fics ig LMAO

7: What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

mmmmmmm,,,,not sure for this, either! My Fundy Fluff Week stuff is all supposed to be sorta fluffy which is probably happy

8: Do you get hate on fics?

Not hate, per say, but comments on the accuracy of my characters, which kinda stabbed my ego a bit lol. It was a nice comment! But the way it was worded was so ouchie!

9: Do you write smut?

I've. Been tempted. As of right now I haven't, though!

10: Do you write crossovers?

Another one of me being tempted!! I haven't yet but I LOOOOVE to read them and so I'd love to write one sometime. (We aren't counting my old VLD Steven Universe au.)

11: Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't think so! Fingers crossed it hasn't happened lol I doubt it would

12: Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope! But if someone were to want to, I would say go ahead! Just send it to me so I can see :D sounds so cool!

13: Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Very recently was my first time doing a proper co-write/collab, which I did with my lovely friend Seven! I would love to do more they're so fun (and probably one of the only ways I'll easily end up writing a multichap KEKW)

14: What's your all-time favorite ship?

ouuuuu ive got a lot of pairings I really really cherish. Jercy my beloved, uhhh Valgrace is so silly, I like to consider myself one of The Kamuegi writers ever, and Pumpkinduo kind of holds an insanely special place in my heart

15: What's the WIP you hope to finish but doubt you ever will?

(Un)Lifetime Achievement Award as sad as it sounds. I love it so much and I'm so insanely proud of it and I love the story but there's soooo much planned and the person I was planning it with hasn't spoken to me in a while. I have hope that I'll finish it someday! Or at least get another two chapters out!

16: What are your writing strengths?

Uhhhhhhh,,,,I don't. actually know! I do a lot of flowery sentences ig? and I think I'm pretty good at angst and similar things

17: What are your writing weaknesses?

Making (and completing) multichap fics, getting ideas to write, finding the motivation to write, and I am definitely bad at planning things out in advance

18: Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I've done it pretty sparingly in the past, because I want to incorporate other languages and loooove language, but don't know any of them very well aside from English. But I try to do a lot of research before I add something in, and am 100% open and insistent that someone correct me if I messed up, or if there's another way to go about saying what I'm trying to say, or just to tell me more!

19: First fandom you wrote for?

Never published because I was a kid and it was. So Bad but !!! It was actually for the Minecraft Roleplay series Mary and Dad's Minecraft Adventure (MADMA) back around 2011-2013. I've been in mcrp hell for. a LONG time jesus christ

20: Favorite fic you've ever written?

ohhhh good question. Fullbury Records is very special to me and I'm ALWAYS thinking of what to add to that series, and (Un)Lifetime Achievement Award ofc is also very special to me. I think Heart to Heart is going places once I get back to writing the next chapter, too But I'm also veeeerrry proud of Famous Last Words, and it's very special to me as a projection piece LMAO

Tag time!!

@dyke420-69 @sparrowsong07 and anyone else who sees this and wants to do it lolol be sure to tag me so I can see :D

[uzyplus]

1. December - 0:05 Rewrite+ VN There will surely be spoilers and I'm not gonna mark any of them, as this is more of a diary rather than anything.

At last, we're here. How long has it even been since I first started it? I watched the anime around December of 2017, probably picking the VN not that long after. The date would fall back to when I was still a first year, at most around the second year of high school. It took me five and a half years to read it from the start to the end. Truly impressive, a new personal best. Back in those years, I'd used to have my HDDs fail on me all the time, being my fault for using old shady ones, that I dug up from whoever knows where, and thanks to that I was reluctant to pick the game back up due to the lost progress. Little did I know that "progress" was in reality just the tip of the story, I'd reckon not even 1/5 into the common route.

Well, part of why it took me so long is that I'd feel embarrassed watching anime or playing related games when people could see what I was doing. At first, I had a room all to myself, with the desk placed next to the door, hidden from the line of sight. Later I'd change the position of the table, which looking back on the room layout, I'm not sure why I went with the most visible spot, but that doesn't matter, as I started playing osu! a lot anyway, forgetting Rewrite even existed. Lastly, I swapped rooms with my sister and now had to share with my brother, who's quite a bit annoying, so I stopped a lot of anime-related things altogether.

And so one afternoon I decided to give the game another go. Thanks to mainly using a laptop (Legion 5 Pro 16ACH6H), I could just sit on the bed, playing without being interrupted or anyone watching my screen. The starting date is 7.2.2022, about a week after the end of the exam period with one more week to go until the next semester. I had great fun with the common route, playing it for a big chunk of time for the next 5 days, and so school started and gameplay stopped.

Taking a look at the saves, looks like there were roughly 11 hours to go, which I then got done a whopping 7 months later, entering Kotori's route on 3.9.2022. And guess what? The next save is from August the next year :kekw: Classic Uzy, what a guy, batshit insane.

Just a bit of an observation beforehand, I just skimmed through the Rewrite first season of the anime, I must say, whatever drugs they were on while making it, I need to get my hands on some of that. To fit all of the routes into such a short time and on top of that to make up so much story that's nothing like the VN, wow, that sure takes a skill or something. I wonder what was going on with me more though, I didn't remember anything at all, so much info that was crucial in the VN, yet when reading it I didn't recall any of it.

But now seriously, from then on I played the game actively, until school started, finally finishing in small increments in late November. The first route I got was Kotori's. My memories at this point are a bit too hazy, having read it more than a year ago. Ranking it, I would have to say it was my least favorite, I found it very saddening, the burden and overall depression. I genuinely felt bad reading the story, seeing how there was no hope for a happy end. Being the first route, I went with Kotori on most selections, because of how fun it was seeing her always cheerful and so carefree, only to then see the opposite. As the first route, it left an impression on me, that all the routes in this stage will be nothing, but pain, displaying that there is no hope in them, but in contrast, the rest were so much better thanks to it. Out of all the stories, I somehow remembered the way Kagari dies here rather vividly from the anime. So strange that I'd remember a 3-minute section of S2E1 despite totally blanking on the rest, but oh well.

Some common story skipping later, I decided to pick Shizuru's route next, however consequently picking Lucia over her. I loved everything about it, just how I hated all of it. The story was a wild ride, making me overly happy the one moment, just to shatter everything the next. I simply wanted Lucia's story to go no way, but great, always thinking the story was finally reaching its end when things were beautiful and peaceful. Lucia made for a wonderful romance heroine, I genuinely wish to read more of Key's works that are focused on that later, but alas, I forgot to grab them during the Authumn same. There isn't a lot that can be said about this route than that. If only Kotarou wasn't such a dork, if only Lucia wasn't so easily manipulated or perhaps the story pulled some miracle. Anyway, in the end, I found the story very satisfactory, Kotaro and Lucia are together, despite all the complications, what more could I ask for? As far as the routes go, this one would be the most impactful. I was always either so happy or unfortunate, so much so that I had to brag a lot about it to my friend. Despite not being as informative as some other routes, I will look back on this one a lot more.

Next up Shizuru. First thing first, during the common route, I enjoyed her interactions a lot, leaving behind way too many saves of her and even more screenshots. I don't have a lot to say about this route. The change of storytelling was nice, Kotarou having lost his memories and slowly regaining them, and the story progressing from that viewpoint. Overall the route was quite calming and easygoing in contrast to the previous, Lucia's. It also introduced Chihaya's standing, which made me excited for her story. I'm not sure whether this was the route where I got to see Gil and Pani, probably. I was honestly amused when I saw them. What goofy ahh hell are these creatures?? I had a great laugh, I didn't expect them, I remembered nothing from the anime, what a joke. The two were a great addition to the story, I truly had fun interacting with them. Also one more thing, Miss. Nishikujou's voice when speaking in a happy tone, man I need more of that in my life, truly healing.

And now it's time for Chihaya. Other than Akane, I still have her fresh in my memory, since I played the majority of it just this week. In the early stages, I'd say I liked her the least out of all the characters. There was a certain front-facing sprite of her that I didn't like looking at for whatever reason, but overall I'm not sure why I disliked her character in the first place. My opinion changed to the point where I’m having a hard time deciding whether her route was my most favorite or not. Tennouji developed quite a bit in the previous 3 routes, but it was here, where I recognized his as well as the others' development the most. Instead of coming out as a foolish kid, who had his mind still focused on getting the club back together, he was now more focused on protecting the girl he had left, while still keeping his ideals, as can be seen later in the abandoned church. The story put him through hardships, which with help he conquered and built character. With Midow's message always on his mind, he was aware of the consequences of his actions and was therefore more serious. Other than Kotarou, I got to like Sakuya a lot. At first, I viewed him as an obstacle, always managing to one-up Kotarou in certain situations, I just couldn't see them ever coming to friendly terms, which made me cherish the relationship between them all so much more. The story was very informative, it led me to understand the path Kotarou will take in the Terra route, due to the similarities between him and Sakuya, and overall the end was happy.

At this point, there was one thing that however bothered me quite a bit. I'm not one to mind small details a lot, I mean if it's convenient for the story then so be it, but the fact that it made a big deal about Kotarou almost bleeding to death, because his old wound opened after Kagari is gone in Kotori's route not being reflected in the other routes did bother me. I didn't notice any other major disparities, a lot of the differences in the stories can be written off as Moon Kagari setting different variables for that individual branch, but it's just that one part that bothered me a bit.

And so we're at the door of the grand finale. At this point, I was getting pretty curious about my reading speed, but unfortunately, I haven't tracked the time I started for one of the days, so I could do that only in the final routes. Would you believe me when I say that I currently cannot recall absolutely anything about the route despite finishing it just 3 days ago? The route seems to be blending in a bit with the Terra, due to taking so much place in the Gaia environment. Let's see. Tennouji's character was very enjoyable in this one. Being able to let all the frustration out and steadily getting over his childish self was a refreshing sight. He was able to sully his hands with blood to fight for the one he loved, Akane. A whole new perspective overall, thanks to the story progressing way further, surpassing the timelines of all the other routes. I felt the downward spiral of events towards the end, but I was still surprised and fooled. I expected Akane to simply give up, I thought that was the end of the road, the Holy Woman steps down, the spiritual branch of the Martel Group disbands and leaves with a happy ever after. Except we got the song of Destruction, not quite the same thing, but it turned out quite the same I guess. I was more than happy to see Yoshino once again, seriously, it's characters like him, Sakuya, and Mr. Esaka I am really happy to interact with. As for the end, Kotarou forces Akane to live to repent her life for everyone she killed, I feel like I've heard those lines somewhere. Either the anime managed to fit those words in it, or it appeared in some other anime at some point in time. In the end, we got our happily ever after, an ending I can get behind.

If I were to order the routes by how much I liked each of them, then I wouldn't be able to do so on a ranking system. I certainly liked Kotori's route the least and Chihaya's probably a bit more than the rest, but in the end, all of the stories were different, good in their own ways, and bad in others.

I'll quickly jump over the Moon route, I remember a lot about it from the anime and I feel like it was adapted very faithfully to the VN. I found a few places that clarified things I missed in the anime, but nothing major. For some reason, my recollection of the events of Season 2 of Rewrite is very good unlike Season 1. I spent in total 169-minutes on the Moon route, which at 4044 lines (data from https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/boards/2000121-anime-and-manga-other-titles/65843636) is about 23-24 lines per minute. A number that is pretty close to my estimation of 25 which I got a while back when I counted how many I could read in one minute. By this calculation, the whole game should've taken me about 72 hours, which it certainly didn't, but it's nice to know that my reading speed is around average. Terra took 445 minutes, 24.7 lines/minute.

As for the Terra route, I too remembered a big chunk of it from the anime, but a lot less. I didn't remember how Tennoji got to the Guardian training camp, only that he was there as well as some of the people he interacted with there. I'm pretty sure I knew about Imamiya, but not so much Nishikujou. Seeking her not happy makes me very sad :<, happily that got fixed around the half :>. Another thing is that I didn't realize for a while that the kids Kotarou saved were the ones from Chihaya's route. I only remembered Midow by name and only confirmed my hunch in the end scenes where I saw them next to Jasmine. I also didn't remember at all what the way Kotarou approached escalating the conflict between Gaia and Guardian, only that he was a double agent and messed them up from the inside. And lastly the ending. Getting there made me extremely happy, it's been a long journey and I'm glad I embarked on it. There's only one remark, for me, the ending scene in the VN couldn't possibly compare to the end in the anime. Come on, I'm just a dude brought up on watching Disney and whatnot romance movies, in which case the VN end felt a bit bland. I'm not one for deeper messages, nor digging any lore up or open endings, I simply yearn for a nice kiss end scene that I can look back to and remind myself of the story I went through.

One last thing, unfortunately, I wasn't able to port the cracked game's saves to the full game after I bought it due to some format conflict, so I had to finish it up on the cracked version, guess I'll never know whether there's any difference between the two. My Steam at this point is a graveyard of games I played cracked, then bought afterward, just to never put a single hour on, ~sigh~, guess I'll have to change that in the future.

I'm unsure what to read next, I still have WorldEnd EX to read and then pick up the unofficial translations, thanks to Yen Press never picking the SukaMoka and after that, I have Planetarian ready, which was another anime I really loved, so I'm super excited for it. Next on my list would Little Busters or Summer Pockets, but well, those will wait, mostly because I forgot to grab them during the Steam sale, and being a former FGO player, I'm really good at waiting, so no worries. Chances are, even if I had the games, I wouldn't pick them up for the next 5 years.

But that's really all from me. For this entry one picture simply won't cut it, so let me find a few of my favorites in the screenshots. Also, 2500 words, let's go.

[emelinstriker]

I have a theory about the reason people(myself included) want to make Reader not entirely human or better/stronger/different than human, can be:

a)we don't like being us, humans.

b)you know those animes where the mc is the most bland, boring, average character, but turns out to be extremely powerful, or gets an extremely strong abylities(by accident, coincidence, chosen one, their loved one is gonna die, etc), gets the attention of all the powerful gorgeus people around them(more often than not because the mc has an ability they are interested in).

And we kinda internalized that being just a human can't be all. There must be something more. A human can't be just a human.

But that's just a theory, a reader theory. Goodnight.

(This got longer than I wanted it to be KEKW- But I can't help it, I talk a lot if it's something I have personal experience with.)

Oh yea no, the those reasons why peeps wanna avoid being human has been clear to me for years. There's way more reasons than that, of which most come down to personal preference. I've glanced at and avoided enough fics since at least 2017 where the Reader is some form of hybrid, god or something that isn't human or isn't unspecified. Just because my own personal preference lies more with reading about a Reader who is actually a regular human on earth, just trying to get by daily in life.

Thing is that if you read a fanfic where the Reader has literally no other description other than "normal mortal human", then there's nothing more to it. Visuals are up to the person behind the screen, besides the fact that the character is a regular human. It's always lowkey painful for me personally seeing peeps try to for example slap wings onto themselves, and pretend like they didn't just read they're supposed to be human. While it's fine if they wanna fantasize about it and ignore any balancing or realism rules privately, the AU is already imbalanced af enough in canon when certain aspects come into play.

The "what if" questions about the Reader being anything other than a human with no magical or racial bonus abilities are immediately seen as nothing more than hypotheticals that I personally would rather like to avoid talking about. My response to them all would just be "No". Because honestly, unless I can see something as an actual possibility in my works and it's actually logcial, like the idea of a Reader being a cannibal as well as, I'd rather keep hypotheticals away and not treat them as if they were possible in canon. Which is why I just straight up am all like "No" at those instead of responding with my own headcanons.

I'm just not comfortable with people trying to force changes on pre-established parts/rule sets in the world building. That's also part of why the Judge is in control of basically the board and its rules, making sure they're being upheld and kept as much in balance as possible. Eight powerful servants is already way more than the AU was supposed to have initially.

However, I am open about the idea of different upbringings of the Reader and how they became the Master and all that, because that is literally part of the philosophy seen in the AU. The idea that all humans are different in the way they act, live, see the world, and interpret things based on their own experiences. You don't have to suddenly be turned into something you are not, but wish to be seen as by others to get along with the people around you, or even be a leader to them. In this case the champions. That's why I usually respond to people talking about either personal experiences they've made themselves, or if it's about a very much possible scenario for a person to be in, or if it's about some condition or disability.

The champions are moreso seen as an extension of such a scenario. They don't just fall heads over heels for the Reader overnight either, as they can also just remain forever platonic. The experience made to get to anything more than that relies on the Master's actions, behavior, etc. with each individual champion. Which is why my responses feel repetetive regarding the reactions of the champions. I can't go into detail on those general reactions as everyone's relationship and expeiences with them would be different.

The AU isn't based around just one Reader, but a collective. If one is non-human, everyone would need to be non-human, more specifically the same species, due to the borrowed soul being that of a human. The only thing that's the same for all the Masters is just the human soul, since that's the thing that lets them find the Reader in the AU and feel connected to them. The soul of the Reader is already powerful enough in that regard, even if it's just mainly for the connection and acting like a tracker for both the champions and the Judge. (Unless an oopsie happens and the Reader accidentally ends up turning into something like an insect the others have a harder time finding as the soul wouldn't be noticeable enough, of course. But it's a rare moment.)

The Reader's soul in my previous works in Undertale actually worked similarly, but was altered a bit in ESAU for the experiment being held in the AU.

[n0phis]

at least one point every day i feel negatively about my art because y'know. Perpetual Artist Disease no matter how happy u usually are with ur work KEKW but going thru just a single tag or seeing like. one person who liked my art every day makes it so worth it

this isnt an urging of ppl to Do More bc the support u guys give me is so much more than enough :) im just feelin appreciative bcos today im hittin my first art block since i came back but it doesnt feel Bad or like a failure it just feels like. ' oh well !!! ill get art to ppl soon, i hope they enjoy it :) itll be worth it' and i have the suspicion that rather than being a 2 week rut like i usually get its just gonna be a single sleepy day LMAO

the reception to my art has been fucking incredible. ppl participating in a dtiys more than they ever did in my years in the furry fandom? meeting so many new ppl and sharing amazing ideas with them every day?? getting so many wonderful suggestions that spark inspo into me whenever im feeling uncreative?? fukcing EDITS on tiktok being made of my art which has never happened before and made me make real life noises of joy when i was told about them?? gah DAMN just. happy moments thank u guys :)

[fantastic-bby]

Enchanted

Pairing: (AFAB, NB)Reader x Minho

Word count: 20.4k

Genre: Fluff | Romance | Idiot to Lovers | Slow burn | Modern Royalty AU | Figure Skater AU | College AU

Summary: Minho spots you one evening at his parents' events and, suddenly, it's as though he starts seeing you every; at his university and even at his figure skating tournaments. He can't help but feel some sort of attraction towards you and wonders who exactly are you...

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol | Aristocrats | Reader has to mostly hide being non-binary | There's a lot of rich people | Minho has no filter

A/n: What's up bingos, I've risen from the dead with a long fic wao I'm ngl Taylor Swift's Enchanted was what inspired the whole thing kekw. This is the softest and most mundane thing I've written in a while considering the fact that I've been working on [REDACTED] ever since I post Han Jisung's Crappy Guide, so have fun and I hope you guys enjoy OwO

Masterlist | AO3 Link

Minho looks around the bustling hall with a slender glass of champagne gingerly held between his gloved fingers. His posture is as straight as it can be and his dark red suit is neatly hugging his frame as he stands in the corner.

The domed ballroom is filled with his family members and friends of his parents, music from the live orchestra bouncing off of the golden walls and beams. Minho wonders why they invested so much in such a grand and golden ballroom when his parents could have easily gone for something more modern.

He’s never truly appreciated the gatherings his parents would hold—they were always too grand for his liking—but that’s what Minho was forced to grow up with. Modern royalty didn’t exactly mean much, but Minho was blessed enough with old money from the importance of his family line; which also meant that he was constantly being watched by the public eye and protected by both the government and his personal bodyguard.

“Minho, could you at least try to be more social?” his mother sighs when she sees him.

“I don’t know what to say to them,” he confesses bluntly. “I’m not close with them, mother. There’s not much for us to talk about and we’re not interested in the same things.”

“I don’t mean your cousins; they’re all as pretentious as your aunts and uncles,” she snorts. “Your father invited a handful of his business partners tonight and we thought that getting to know them will be good for you.”

Minho looks around once again, his eyes only now noticing a handful of new faces. He lets out a somewhat impressed huff when he sees a woman standing in the other corner of the room, a dark red dress hugging her figure as she politely raises manicured hand to shake hands with another businessman. Minho recognises her from an ad for some high end makeup line.

“You have the face of a model, Minho. Give it a shot,” his mother says as she pats his shoulder gently.

“I don’t care for modelling, mother,” Minho says right before he takes a sip of the champagne. “You know that.”

“Models can work up until they’re fifty, but athletes usually only last up until they’re in their mid thirties.”

“And that’s enough for me,” he argues. “Ice skating is something I enjoy. I would like to continue doing it for as long as I’m allowed to.” The woman purses her lips into a straight line with a sigh.

“As long as you’re happy, darling, but please try to socialise. Your father’s already thinking of getting you to meet some fine women from some of his friends.” Minho’s eyebrows furrow together, head whipping to look at his mother in pure shock.

“No, I refuse,” he immediately states.

“You know how he’s like—”

“And I refuse,” Minho shakes his head. “I don’t care. I’m not marrying some girl that would help with business.”

“I’m not keen with the idea either, okay? But your father is the one in charge,” she grumbles as her arms cross over her chest. “Marrying off my only son just for the sake of business—it’s ridiculous. I told him that I don’t want him doing that and that I surely wouldn’t force you to do that, but he won’t have it. If you’re not in a relationship by the time you’re twenty-five, he’s going to start pushing for your betrothal.”

“Must I find one so soon, mother? I don’t think I’ve even met enough people that I’ve truly felt attracted to,” he grumbles.

“With time, Minho. Just… don’t be like your aunts and uncles,” she advises, “with me as your mother, I will not tolerate any inbreeding.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

“You’re excused for the night if you’d like to be in your room instead,” his mother says just as she takes a glass of champagne from a passing waiter, flashing him a gracious smile when he stops momentarily. She turns back to Minho and her smile changes into one more loving, “the first day of your new year is tomorrow. I’ll just tell your father that you’re preparing for your classes.”

“Thank you, mother.” Minho lets out a sigh of relief that he hadn’t known he was holding the entire time, his now empty glass of champagne being handed to the next waiter that walks past them. “I’ll… try your suggestions, but I won’t make any promises.”

“It’s alright. I trust that you will find your way on your own time, my little prince,” she chuckles.

“I’ve asked you so many times to not call me that,” he cringes when she tries to kiss him on the cheek.

“It doesn’t matter how old you get, you will always be my little prince,” his mother smiles. “Now, I won’t be occupying you for any longer. Rest up. The chauffeur will be waiting at eight a.m. sharp to take you to campus. Goodnight, Minho.”

“Goodnight, mother.” Minho bows to her, wondering why he has to hold so much formality towards his own parents.

He turns around and makes his way towards the large, mahogany doors to the left of the room. Minho keeps a smile on his face; one that he always has on whenever he attends formal events. Slipping past all of the guests, Minho looks around slightly until his eyes make contact with someone that he’s not seen at any of his parents’ gatherings.

Minho’s movements immediately halt when you turn around and catch his gaze. You have on your own smile that he presumes is fake, but the corners of your lips drop when you see him and Minho’s able to catch a glimpse of sincerity behind your empty expression. Despite knowing that he’s never met you before, Minho can’t help but feel some kind of recognition when your eyes meet.

Your off-shoulder ball gown is light blue, the dark blue accents that frame your torso in a way that makes it look like a corset and the skirt elegantly reaching your feet. He catches a glimpse of your heels underneath, noting the way they glimmer whenever light reaches it.

You stare at him for a moment before being preoccupied with a prince that he’s seen only a handful of times, the professional smile immediately making its way onto your face when you face the black suited man.

Minho stares only for a moment longer before he continues on his way out of the ballroom, but your presence occupies his mind for the rest of the night. You look like you’re around his age—early 20s, perhaps 23 as he is. He feels like he’s seen you before. There was some kind of recognition that seemed to flash in your eyes as well when you made eye contact, but Minho has a feeling that you only recognise him from seeing him in figure skating tournaments.

He lets out a relieved sigh once behind the doors of his bedroom, his shoulders slumping forward and his back leaning against the dark wood. Minho works quickly on pulling the velvet blazer off of his shoulders and neatly hanging it on one of the many coat hooks that line the wall of his room. If he had the energy to, Minho would typically hang it in the large walk-in closet and in the section where he’d hang his used clothing, but he can’t be bothered to.

Minho just wants to lay down and allow sleep to take over. Once free of the suffocatingly heavy outfit and his slacks tossed aside in the corner of his room, he changes into the loosest of his shirts and shorts, plopping himself onto the queen sized bed and moaning the moment his sore back hits the soft covers.

“Fucking finally,” Minho sighs to himself. He picks his phone off of his bedside table, lazily scrolling through the many messages from his friends.

Sungiezz: Dude Get this: there’s apparently a new royal in our university

Seungmo: Yeah haha But it’s all word of mouth Not too sure about it until class starts tomorrow

Sungiezz: Have any ideas of new princes or princesses in town? You’re the only prince in the area that goes to SKU Maybe you know them

Minho: Dumbass Just because I’m a prince doesn’t mean that I know all of them -_-

Sungiezz: You never know!

Seungmo: You know Ji said the same thing about the gay guy in our class He asked if he knew his cousin because he’s gay too

Minho: You’re actually I can’t believe you, Sung, why the hell would you say that to someone???

Sungiezz: For what it’s worth, he said he did!

Seungmo: Not every gay person knows every gay person The logic applies to Minho Just because he’s royalty, it doesn’t mean he knows all of the other royals

Sungiezz: God, you guys suck Haven’t you guys ever heard of Six Degrees of Separation? It’s supposed to mean that everyone in the world is only six people away from you!

Minho: You’re such a special, special, child

Sungiezz: I’m serious!!!!! You guys never take me seriously, sigh

Seungmo: We trust psychological theories But not from you LOL

Sungiezz: Whatever I’m going to bed

Minho: Aww Sungs, we were just kidding hehe But I wanna sleep too I’m exhausted

Seungmo: Another event?

Minho: They have one every week It’s fucking exhausting

Sungiezz: You know, for a prince, you’d think that you would have more of a filter

Minho: Suck my dick

Seungmo: Don’t bother his royal highness any longer, Sungs You know how cranky he gets when he’s tired

Minho: You know how tired I get when you bitches decide to treat me like a prince Hey Siri, play Choke

Sungiezz: Haha Very funny, Minho

Minho: Choke. I’m going to sleep

Sungiezz: Goodnight, Minho

Jisung: Night night <3333333333333

Minho puts his phone on his bedside table with a fond smile on his face. He’s never felt more connected to anyone other than Han Jisung and Kim Seungmin; the only two students that he’s made friends with on-campus. He’s never actually felt like he ever needed more than one or two friends purely out of keeping himself safe.

Minho’s extroverted, yes. He’s good at socializing, yes he is—but Minho’s social life and his personal life are strictly kept private for the sake of privacy and trust. Too many people have befriended him only for his status and for the lavish lifestyle that he lives. Too many of them were only in his circle because Minho thought that money could buy him company.

Seungmin and Jisung were always different.

They never treated Minho any differently than they treat each other and they only come to his house to play with his cats. They never care for expensive dinners at 5 star restaurants, they never care for any of the expensive souvenirs and trinkets that he gets from travelling, and they never care for his status. The pair only asked about his bodyguard the first time, but after that, it was normal for them and they hadn’t minded it since.

To them, Lee Minho is Lee Minho. He’s not a prince; he’s just some guy that they became friends with at college. The pair were already joined at the hip when Minho met them, but they pretty much sewed him to themselves after meeting him. The two take him to the dodgy diner on the South side of town that have the extremely good double patty burgers, they take him to the park to run away from geese, they take him to the beach on weekends where Jisung’s allowed to take his car; Minho’s never felt any different from the two.

Which is why he loves them way more than he would ever outwardly admit.

Two knocks at his door followed by a soft, “your highness?” Makes Minho squeeze his eyes shut in frustration. “It’s Soojin. The queen has asked for me to prepare you a warm towel. Her majesty said you may be feeling a bit stressed with the new semester starting.”

He forces himself out of bed and trudges over to the door, pulling open to reveal the blonde holding a silver tray with a single white towel roll sitting on it. Her long hair is neatly tucked into a bun that’s mandatory for all of the housekeepers in the mansion and her black suit is as spotless as it was in the morning.

“Thank you, Soojin,” Minho mutters as he takes the towel. “Tell my mother that I’m fine. Just tired.”

“As you wish,” the woman bows before he closes the door. With the white fabric in his hands, Minho sighs before deciding to use it anyway. He returns to his bed, climbing underneath the covers and gently laying the towel over his face, and slowly drifting off to sleep.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

After a lapse of judgement, Minho watches with his arms crossed over his broad chest, watching as Seungmin chases Jisung around the campus park with two books in his hands. The prince had assumed that Seungmin wouldn’t have a manhunt for Jisung after mentioning the film student’s raging crush on one of the students in his class, but Minho was so terribly wrong.

“I was just joking!” Jisung cries as he hides behind Minho, the younger’s hands gripping onto the prince’s shoulders to use him as a human shield against Seungmin’s fit.

“I told you to stop talking about that,” Seungmin groans as he throws the smaller of the notebooks in Jisung’s direction. The book smacks against Minho’s chest, a grunt leaving him at the contact.

“Cut it out, Seungmin,” Minho laughs with his hand reaching out to keep Seungmin at a distance and Jisung shifting him from side-to-side. “If you keep this up, you’ll be sweaty by the time we get to my place—and you know how my mother feels about you smelling.”

“I’m—Are you saying that I smell?!” Seungmin scoffs loudly.

“To be fair, that woman has the nose of a bloodhound,” Jisung claims.

“Please, never refer to my mother that way ever again,” Minho sighs.

“Sorry,” he immediately apologises. Seungmin lets out a sigh of his own as he crouches down to pick up the textbook he had tossed at the two, gripping it along with the thicker ‘Introduction to Film’ books.

“Watch that mouth, Jisung. The monarch may not matter that much anymore, but they’re still protected,” Seungmin hisses.

“It’s alright,” Minho gives Jisung a pursed lip smile, “it’s not his fault.” He raises his hand to ruffle Jisung’s light brown hair until it sticks out messily. “So what do you guys wanna do now? I have a few hours before I have training. We can head over to my place and hang out in the games room.” He pauses for a moment to glance at his bodyguard who stands a few feet away from the ground, dressed in a plain black t-shirt and jeans. “Let mother know that I’m coming home early.”

“Yes, your highness,” Aki nods right before pulling his phone out. Minho has had the same bodyguard ever since he was a child, the heavily built man having watched him grow up and knowing exactly what his habits are. The only thing that Minho minds nowadays with Aki is the fact that he fails to be casual with the young prince.

“I don’t want the games room—I want your Dori,” Jisung laughs.

“Can you believe it? All of the consoles and all of the games you have in the games room, yet Jisung chooses to hang out with your cats instead,” Seungmin chuckles.

“His cats are cute!” he defends himself. “And they give me a lot of attention.”

“If it’s worth anything; the cats don’t give just anyone attention,” Minho claims.

“Hell yeah! See?! I passed the kitty vibe check!” Jisung cheers.

“Am I allowed to play darts?” Seungmin asks.

“You can do whatever you want. The games room is my responsibility.” Minho smiles when he sees the two of them smile, his heart flipping at the sight of his beloved friends.

But something else catches his attention for a moment.

There’s a sense of being watched that overcomes Minho’s mind, his arms uncrossing as he glances to the side. His smile drops when he makes eye contact with you. You’re glancing at him as well with your hand loosely wrapped around the strap of your black backpack.

You look completely different than from the night that Minho had seen you; a plain white t-shirt, black jeans and a pair of canvas sneakers. You laugh at a joke coming from one of your friends, a smile that reaches your eyes pulling at your lips. Minho breathes out a laugh when he sees how different you seem in and out of formality.

You bow your head slightly when you realise that he sees you and Minho returns the exchange, his own head lowering slightly before it raises to see you smiling.

“Who are you nodding at?” Seungmin asks.

“I found out who the other royal is,” Minho mutters.

The two immediately whip their heads in your direction, obviously staring at you and not even leaving a single wonder about who they’re staring at. You give them a smile as well before turning to your own friends.

“Who is that?”

“They were at the event the other night,” he continues as he starts pushing them in the other direction. “I don’t really know where she came from because it was the first time I saw her.”

“Do you know her?” Jisung presses.

“Other than just making eye contact? Not really,” Minho shakes his head.

“She seems pretty chill,” Seungmin says as he glances over his shoulder once again to look at you.

“Stop making it so obvious,” he scoffs when he lightly shoves Seungmin’s shoulder. “Some royals don’t like being stared at in public—”

“Like you!” Jisung points out.

“Exactly,” Minho nods, “and some of them can be extremely pretentious. They act like they’re above everyone else; royal or not. A few of them even tried to step over me and I gave them a reality check.” He slings his arms over both of their shoulders, walking in between them. “They seemed pretty cool when I saw them at the event, but you can’t really be too sure unless you talk to them.”

“I wanna head to the bowling alley,” Seungmin states suddenly.

“But I have a bowling alley at home,” Minho points out. “And it doesn’t smell like old socks and I can ask the chef for snacks.”

“Do you have any of those mini meringue pies that your mum makes?” Jisung questions with an excited look in his eyes.

“We don’t have meringue pies, but we have songpyeon…?” His statement comes off as more of a question, head tilting in wonder as he tries to remember what was the last kind of dessert he had recently. “Yeah, I think we have songpyeon and maybe some mooncakes. Mother really likes them, and she makes sure the pantry’s always stocked with them.”

“What about Doritos?”

“I’m taking you to a king’s mansion and you want Doritos?” Minho laughs.

“I don’t get Doritos at home,” Seungmin claims with a shrug. The eldest of the three stares at him with his jaw dropped. “What? I like them.”

Minho blinks a few times before breathing out a laugh. Out of everything that Seungmin could ask for at his home—and Minho truly has everything—and all Seungmin wants are Doritos that he could easily buy from the 7/11 at the campus cafeteria.

His smile changes into a fonder one before he shakes his head with a chuckle, “if we don’t have any, we can pick some up on the way home.”

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

“Do you know him?” Hongjoong asks when he notices you staring at Minho and his friends.

“I briefly saw him at a ball the other night,” you hum.

“He’s the only royal that goes to SKU—well, now there’s two of you now that you’re here,” Yeji claims.

“The entire university’s already heard of the princess who just joined our campus, you know?” Chan points out.

“Please don’t refer to me as such,” you state while glancing at the music student, his mouth immediately closing shut when he sees your eyes. “I didn’t know he was a student here. I had heard about another royal attending this place, but I hadn’t realised it was him.”

Your only friends so far consist of Hongjoong, Chan, and Yeji; all three of them taking different courses but were nice enough to take you around campus when you suddenly showed up out of nowhere.

“He seems pretty cool,” Hongjoong says with a sigh. “But that’s only what I’ve heard.”

“Jisung and Seungmin are pretty nice. Jisung once gave me the last cookie in the bakery because I was having a bad day,” Yeji chuckles. You bow at Minho, smiling when he returns the greeting.

His friends obviously turn to you as well, which makes you laugh slightly and smile at them. You and your friends watch as Minho suddenly grabs them by the shoulders and pushes them in the direction of the campus gates.

“What was that?” Chan laughs.

“I think he knows that I might not like other people staring at me,” you guess when you notice one of them turning to look at you, only for Minho to push him once again. “Royals don’t like being stared at. Some of them think people are not worthy of looking at them,” you sigh and turn back to your friends, “I think it’s good that he does that. If I were someone who minded, it would’ve turned out messy had his friends stared at me for any longer.”

“I still find it so interesting that you talk so formally,” Hongjoong points out, earning a smack on the shoulder from Chan and a glare.

“It’s fine, Hongjoong,” you chuckle, “the way I speak is habitual and it avoids any sort of conflict in public. Should I bump into a royal that demands respect, I would have to speak this way. I prefer not having to argue with anyone.”

“What’s the deal with royals and… you know…”

“When you’re born into a family such as Minho and I, you grow up with mostly your family around you. If they think being a royal is worthy of being pretentious, then they’ll act pretentious and spit on anyone that they think is lower,” you explain. The thought lingers in your mind for a moment longer before you shake your head and smile, “let’s move on. I don’t like dwelling on the issues with royal families.”

“We’re heading to the cinema room after this and we might crash at Chan’s place, do you wanna join?” Yeji asks.

“I have plans tonight, unfortunately, but we can always plan for another time,” you sigh. “I have dinner with a royal family from another region. Something about a betrothal.”

“Betrothal…?” Her words trail off, all three of their faces painted with shock as they stare at you.

“As a female born royal, I have the, oh so lovely, fate of being married off to a prince from a different region. Thank God that my parents have no interest in,” you raise your fingers into the air to quote, “‘protecting the family line’ and are decent enough in letting me choose my suitors rather than choosing them for me.”

“What does that—Oh…” Chan’s face contorts into one of disgust, his nose cringing. “I didn’t realise that was still a thing.”

“You’d be surprised, but every family has their differences,” you answer with a shrug. “What are you all watching anyway?”

“Hongjoong’s trying to convince Chan to finally watch Hereditary,” Yeji hums.

“I refuse to watch that on my own,” Chan scoffs while feverishly shaking his head. You tilt your head curiously, silently asking him to explain further. “I-I don’t like horror movies,” he admits sheepishly, “never been a fan of them. I’m more scared of them than I actually say that I am.”

“Hereditary is good,” Hongjoong snickers. “I also think that maybe Chan needs to step out of his shell and explore the array of horror movies.”

“I’m easily scared, Hong,” he grumbles, strong arms crossing over his broad chest as he shoots a glare in Hongjoong’s direction, “you know that. The only way I watch horror movies is with my friends so that I can distract myself with their reactions instead.”

“You got scared the last time you saw Jeongin scream at a ghost prop during Halloween,” Yeji laughs.

“Have you heard that man scream?!” Chan throws his arms into the air, “he screams like he’s possessed! Anyone in the right mind would be scared of his scream!”

“Jeongin’s one of Chan’s juniors,” Hongjoong explains softly while Yeji and Chan start going back and forth, “he’s got a huge set of lungs on him and he casually screams like someone’s trying to break into his apartment.”

“That’s interesting,” you chuckle.

“Every holiday, we get themed events. Halloween’s about the time where the performing arts club have haunted mazes or haunted houses that all of the students can attend and participate in. I’ll admit quite proudly that I’m in charge of a lot of the performing arts events,” he continues, “if you’re interested, we usually get to dress up around that time, too.”

“Oh? I’ve never been to a costume party before,” you admit, “my old university didn’t indulge in events like that and my high school wouldn’t either.”

“Really?” Yeji ceases her argument with Chan to turn her attention to you. When you nod, she lets out an excited gasp and claps her hands together, “we can help you make a costume this year!”

“We can think of something cool that maintains your dignity,” Chan nods.

“What do you guys usually dress up as?” you ask.

“Last year, my friend Changbin and I went dressed as WWE wrestlers.”

“Don’t those men only wear tight briefs and knee paddings?”

“Yep!” he nods proudly.

“Chan and Changbin went around the place with their dicks almost falling out.” Yeji clicks her tongue in disgust. “It was hardly a sight to see.”

“I can’t imagine the secondhand embarrassment I would feel,” you laugh.

“Precisely,” Hongjoong giggles. “Don’t worry, (Y/n). If they do that again, you can just stick with my friends and I. We usually dress like celebrities from the 80s.”

“Ooh,” you gasp slightly, “I’m curious to see how you would pull off a Prince costume.”

“Oh, Hongjoong does old pop celebrities so well,” Yeji gushes. “You should’ve seen him in his Freddie Mercury costume last year. He looked wonderful! And he even had a stand microphone that he brought around with him!”

“What do you usually dress up as, Yeji?”

“I go with whatever I feel like usually,” she admits with a shrug. “Last year, I went as Regina George from Mean Girls.”

“That feels very in character with you,” you joke, causing Yeji to gasp loudly. Chan’s hand slaps over his mouth in shock while Hongjoong chokes on nothing, his hand raising to Chan’s shoulder for leverage as he coughs violently. Your face cracks, lips pursing to contain your smile when you see the gobsmacked look on her face.

“God, I really like you,” Yeji laughs.

“She could spend the rest of her course with us, right?” Chan chuckles.

“I’d prefer if you wouldn’t refer to me that way,” you quickly interject. “I-I don’t appreciate the use of feminine pronouns, but I have to present as a female to protect my parents’ image in public.”

“Oh,” his smile drops. “My bad.”

“It’s fine, you couldn’t have known,” you reassure him with a smile. “I only tell this to people that I’m close to.”

“We won’t tell anyone,” Hongjoong shakes his head.

“I trust that you wouldn’t or else you could be arrested for defamation towards my family.” Your words come out smoothly, as though it’s such a normal, everyday thing. His eyes widen immensely, mouth opening and closing at a loss of words. “It’s a joke,” you chuckle, “they don’t really care about our identities and what people call us, but they do care if it happens at a mass level for no reason. I doubt they would put much effort into protecting my name unless my parents were to get involved and I would rather the public don't find out I'm non-binary.”

“That’s totally fine, (Y/n),” Yeji reassures you.

“Now, I have about three hours before I’m supposed to be at home, so shall we get some lunch?” you suggest while clasping your hands together in front of yourself.

“We can get something to eat from the Chinese stall in the cafeteria,” Chan suggests. “I just know you’re going to like their szechuan dumplings.”

“I’ll trust your judgement,” you smile and allow them to lead you to the cafeteria.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

Minho thinks he’s going crazy. He already felt like he was going crazy from the way you were suddenly showing up at his parents’ events and at his university—but at his skating tournament?!

“Keep your head straight, Minho,” his coach warns when she sees his thoughts going elsewhere. “This tournament determines whether or not you’re eligible for international tournaments.”

“Y-Yeah, sorry coach,” he immediately apologises, turning his head away from your presence in the other side of the room and with the female skaters.

“I understand the nerves, but we can’t allow that to disturb your routine, your highness,” Kara continues. “Would you like something to calm them down?”

“No it’s fine,” Minho shakes his head. “I can do this.” She places her hands on both of Minho’s shoulders, her fingers massaging his taut muscles. The massage does little to quell his raging nerves, but what does help is when you turn around and make eye contact with him.

Your eyes squint slightly when you try getting a clearer look of him before they widen in shock and your lips part. You look just as surprised as he is at each others’ appearance, but once again, you’re disturbed by someone else; the woman who he assumes is your coach.

You nod politely when she asks you something, the older woman bowing slightly before she walks away from you. You turn your gaze back to Minho, your face relaxing when you realise he’s still watching you and you nod your head like you did when you saw him on campus.

Minho, as he did then, returns the nod and flashes a small smile when he raises his head. You wave at him this time, your hand raising into the air with your fingers splayed out; the act only making him smile more and wave back.

“Who are you waving at?” Kara asks when she turns away from one of the contestants currently skating, light brown hair slipping from her ponytail and framing the sides of her face.

“It’s a princess from another region,” Minho mutters. “I’ve seen her about three times before.”

“Spoken to her before?” his coach asks, but Minho shakes his head.

“Never really felt the need to.” He glances at Kara, only being faced with a very confused and almost judgemental look on his face.

“Minho, if you don’t make a move on her, then I might as well because she’s gorgeous,” Kara scoffs.

“You should see her in a ball gown,” Minho absentmindedly mumbles. His eyes widen at the confession, cheeks turning bright pink when Kara lets out a loud gasp and smiles.

“So, you do have a thing for her?”

“No, I don’t,” he grumbles and tries his hardest to ignore Kara’s teasing pokes and laughs. “Kara, please,” Minho whines, “I don’t want to think about that. I don’t even know her—and knowing other royals, she could easily be a pompous asshole.”

“But you’ve never spoken to her before,” she remarks.

“But I’ve known enough of them to be wary,” he counters.

“Minho, give her a chance,” Kara rolls her eyes, quickly catching herself and clearing her throat. “I can’t do that in public; my mistake.”

“I couldn’t give a rat's ass whether or not you're formal with me.” Minho rolls his eyes with an exasperated sigh leaving past his lips. “It irks me how I can’t have relationships with people who can joke around with me.”

“It’s not exactly easy to be so casual with you, you know,” she sighs, voice lowering to a whisper, “I’m not exactly fond of the immense formality, but your parents insist and you have a bodyguard who follows you all over the place who tells them everything. I appreciate having at least some middle-ground with the people I train. I like at least being able to treat them like a friend.”

“For what it’s worth, Kara,” he turns to her, “this is exactly how most of the people I make friends with talk to me.”

Kara’s lips purse into a straight line, sympathy painting her features when Minho turns back to the skating rink.

“Well, I’m up after this,” Minho claims as he starts tying the shoelaces to his dark red skates. He pulls his white jacket off and lays it on the bench beside him, the sequins of his dark red leotard shining in the light. “I’ll be fine, Kara,” he reassures her. “I’m used to it.”

“Doesn’t make it any better…” she trails off, eyes flitting away from him before she shakes his head. “We can talk about this later—I have faith in you, Minho. Just do it the way you practiced and you’ll do spectacularly.”

Kara pats him on the shoulder once and gives him an encouraging smile just as his name is announced through the speakers, cheers coming from the crowd of the audience that either loves him for his skating or for his status as the region’s royal bachelor.

Minho makes his way up to the edge of the rink, letting out a mouthful of air to calm himself down further. His heart pounds in his chest and in his ears, his teeth grinding together anxiously as he takes his first step on the ice.

The cheering only gets louder when he skates to the centre of the rink and raises his arms into the air, taking his first position before the music starts.

Minho loves competing for many things; the main reason being how fair the judges actually are. His parents have never tried meddling with his tournaments, which makes his efforts in perfecting his sport even more worth it. Every jump, every spin, and every glide—Minho’s trophies and medals are purely from his own efforts;

Never his status.

For a moment, he catches your wonder-filled eyes watching his routine intently. Minho wonders whether you compete for the same reasons. Most royals that are more laid-back prefer picking up competitions that are completely fair and that give the contestant equal opportunity to win; purely their own skill and willpower.

Minho lets out a breath of relief and closes his eyes as he carries on with his routine, body feeling free of all of the stress and anxiety from his family and from school. He truly feels free whenever he’s on ice and allows the metal blades to glide him along the ice and move as though he’s made of water—as though he has no resistance in his body at all.

When the music ends, Minho’s kneeling on the ground at the end of his routine. He stands up and raises his arms into the air with his chest heaving out of exertion, legs somehow not trembling like they usually do whenever he finishes his routine.

The commentator announces the end of his performance and Minho skates back to the side, not without glancing over his shoulders to see you clapping and smiling widely, nodding your head at him, the small act sending a sense of pride rushing throughout his veins along with the adrenaline.

“Minho, you did so well!” Kara cheers, bouncing up and down while clapping. “I’m going to be so upset if you don’t at least get bronze for this—you did amazing!”

“Thank you,” he thanks her in between breaths. “I felt amazing, Kara.”

“That’s always a good sign,” she smiles. “Now, get yourself hydrated! Your routine is difficult and it takes a lot of strength. I can’t have you collapsing on me.”

Minho nods, swallowing thickly as he tries to catch his ragged breath and follows her to the benches.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

Minho’s in his regular corner of the ballroom. He wishes that he could chug down the rest of his wine without anyone noticing, but he’d rather not drunken himself at his parents’ event. He lets out a sigh when another flock of princesses giggle as they walk past him, waving their hands at him and fluttering their eyelashes.

You look as amazing as he thought you did last time, but your dress isn’t blue this time. Instead it’s burgundy; elegant as he falls to the floor and covers your shoulders completely. The long sleeves reach down to your forearms and your heels are black.

Your smile doesn’t quite reach your eyes in the way it does whenever Minho sees you on campus, but he knows exactly why you’re not genuine. Your head turns to look at him, the way you always do and smile at him.

The only difference this time is that Minho places his half drunk glass of wine onto the passing waiter and walks towards you. He doesn’t know exactly what it is that brings himself to you, but all he knows is that it’s partially his own will and partially the attraction of something completely different. Your lips part in slight surprise, but you bow to the guest you’re talking to and excuse yourself to turn to Minho.

“We’re finally introducing ourselves,” you chuckle when he stands in front of you, back straight and with one arm bent in front of himself.

“We always seem to be in each others’ radius, so I decided that we should actually get to know each other,” Minho says politely with a smile. “I’m Lee Minho,” he introduces himself with a bow.

“(Y/n).” Your hands fluidly extend to the sides as you return his greeting with a curtsy. “I wouldn’t have expected you to be a figure skater had I not seen you at the tournament,” you point out.

“Neither had I,” he admits, his smile fading away when he realises that it’s far too loud for him to hear you. “Mind if we move to the balcony? It’s a bit too loud in here.”

“I was hoping you’d ask,” you sigh in relief and allow him to lead you to the open balcony, the sound from inside the ballroom immediately fizzing out when you’re outside. The buzz is softer, easier to block out, and makes the perfect environment for you and Minho to properly talk to each other.

“I was very surprised to see you at the skating rink,” Minho starts as he leans his arms against the concrete balustrade, “at SKU, though, I heard news of another royal joining the campus, but I hadn’t known about you until I saw you for the first time in this very ballroom.”

“My parents had sent me to a finishing school across the country until I had asked to be transferred to a university that was more… of the current generation,” you explain. Minho’s eyebrows knit together in confusion, his bottom lip jutting out slightly. “It isn’t the sort of finishing school that you would expect it to be. It catered more to royal traditions and mannerisms that were fitting for all genders. The syllabus was forced to change in the 90s, which I’m admittedly very glad for.”

“Why transfer to SKU this late?” Minho questions curiously.

“I had asked to be transferred to a university closer to my family. I hadn’t fancied the distance between us if I were to stay at the finishing school, so I chose to come back,” you admit while setting the glass down on the smooth concrete.

“And my parents’ events?”

“My parents decided it would be good for me to socialise with other big names, but I can’t exactly say that I’m enjoying myself,” you chuckle.

“I don’t exactly enjoy myself here either,” Minho confesses with a laugh. “I’m not a fan of half of the personalities that fill this room. I’m going to safely assume that you’re not like them.” He glances at you with a teasing look on his face and you quickly shake your head.

“Oh, God no. I would most likely break my own hand than act like them,” you scoff. “Half of them act as though I’m no more of a royal than they are, and the disrespect I get from looking like a woman—” you cut yourself off to roll your eyes, “it’s baffling.”

“You know, I’ve never quite understood that either. You’re just as significant as they are and your status is the same as theirs; why be disrespectful just because you wear a dress?” he grumbles.

“You seem like you keep secrets well,” you claim after looking him up and down, “I don’t consider myself a woman. I use gender neutral pronouns.”

Minho turns to you in surprise, “a royal admitting that they’re non-binary?”

“Only to those that I feel will hold the secret,” you clarify.

“But you’ve only known me through glances and the current conversation; how could you possibly have judged me from that?”

“A mere feeling,” you hum with a smile. Minho’s eyes narrow for a moment as he takes your words into consideration before he smiles as well. There’s a strange relief that floods his chest at how open you are despite the recent introductions.

“Careful there, your highness, I might just start calling you The Royal Enby,” he jokes. You let out a hearty laugh, your hand reaching out to smack his shoulder lightly.

“If anyone in that ballroom were to hear, they’d have both of our heads!” Minho laughs as well. His hand holds onto his shoulder as he does, sighing after he laughs. “Never mention this to anyone,” you warn.

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” he chuckles.

You keep your back straight and your hands clasped in front of yourself as you look out. It’s still early enough that the Sun still hasn’t completely gone down yet and the remaining sunlight blends in with the night sky.

“I have spent so many years of my life locked away, holding expectations with only a single word tied to my name,” you mutter. You turn to look at Minho, who’s intently looking at you. “I have only known what it was to be referred to and to be seen as royalty, which is something anyone would expect to be as heavenly; constantly being put on a pedestal as though you’re a doll of the most skilled craftsman, but I found myself hating that. I realise now that you’re the first royal I’ve met who also feels this way.”

Minho doesn’t say anything upon hearing your words at first. He lets the thought settle in his mind for a moment before nodding.

“Birds of a feather flock together,” he shrugs. “I’ve spent most of my life surrounded by cousins who thought that they were better than me—cousins who thought that they could push me around just because I was younger than them. After a while, you grow tired of all of the arrogance and the aristocracies.”

“Do you wish that sometimes you were born to a family that wasn’t of royal blood?” you ask.

“Of course,” Minho nods. “And… of course, I am grateful for the opportunities I was blessed with and the luxury that I was very lucky to grow up with… but sometimes I wish that maybe I was born into a life that was less high profile. Everyone talks to me a certain way, everyone treats me a certain way—they treat me as though I’m made of glass—as though I’m so fragile.”

You feel your heart aching, resonating with Minho as he speaks.

“Every sports event while I was growing up was, ‘make sure the prince doesn’t get hurt!’, or, ‘ the prince isn’t allowed to play! It’s too rough for a boy of his status!’,” he sighs. “It’s tiring.”

“It makes you feel like an alien,” you finish for him. Minho glances at you and lets out a deep breath, nodding sadly.

“I always wondered why the other kids at school would never play with me. They were so scared of the ‘big, scary man’ that would follow me around the block,” he continues. “I realised in high school that no one wanted to be friends with me because they were scared of fucking up—oh,” Minho gasps. “Excuse my language.”

“Excused,” you reassure him with the wave of your hand. “Profanity has never been an issue with me.”

“You just speak so proper that I worry about slipping my words every now and then,” he chuckles. You shake your head and give him a reassuring smile, urging him to continue. “Well, kids at school were so scared of accidentally hurting the ‘porcelain prince’ that no one wanted to be around me. The only ones that did enter my circle were only there because I had money; and lots of it. I stopped making friends after I realised that,” Minho confesses softly, the thumb and index of his left hand picking at the skin around the thumb of his right. “The only people that overlook my title are Jisung and Seungmin.”

“I assume they’re the ones that you are always around on campus,” you say and Minho nods.

“They don’t care about my status. They don’t care about my family. They see me as another person—another human—and they treat me like another student. They come to my house,” he turns around and raises his arm to refer to the ballroom, “to play with my cats and to eat Doritos.” Minho breathes out a small laugh, “I hadn’t known what it was like to actually be friends with someone until I met them, but please don’t tell them this. They’ll never let me hear the end of it.”

“I wouldn’t dream of spilling,” you laugh. “I trust you to keep a secret of mine, thus I’ll keep one of yours.” Minho smiles.

He glances into the ballroom when the music becomes louder and the talking becomes softer, a small announcement from his father echoing throughout the room and out onto the balcony.

“I would like my son to be the centre of the waltz tonight,” he announces.

“I think we need to head back inside,” you sigh. Minho purses his lips into a straight line before straightening his posture and taking a deep breath. The two of you make your way back into the room to listen.

“Prince Minho had won a gold medal at the national figure skating tournament last week,” his father continues from the indoor balcony that oversees the entire ballroom, “to celebrate, I’d like him to lead the waltz.” Applause breaks throughout the room, all eyes turning to Minho who smiles and bows in gratitude. The prince prepares to make his way to the center of the room, but his father’s voice stops him. “Would you like to choose a partner, Minho?”

He freezes in his movement, looking up at his father who all but nods. A small sense of frustration runs throughout Minho’s thoughts, his stomach churning at the idea of having to choose a partner to dance with.

Until he sees you watching him with a supporting smile on your face and bright eyes. Minho locks his eyes with yours and you immediately understand what he’s asking of you, to which you nod.

“I choose her highness, Princess (Y/n),” Minho announces with his hand extended in your direction. You push past the crowd and take his gloved hand in yours, letting him pull you close enough for him to whisper, “thank you.” The lights dim when the music starts and Minho has his hand resting on your waist. “Do you mind if I keep this fast paced?”

“I do enjoy a bit of a challenge,” you chuckle. Minho raises an eyebrow, seeing the glint in your eyes before he raises your other hand in the air and steps his right foot forward. Your left foot moves backward when he does and you continue on with the dance that moves slowly and in time with the music.

Until the rhythm picks up.

Minho gives you one look before he twirls you and catches your waist. “Too fast?”

“Not fast enough,” you remark. His lips curl into a smug smile as he pulls you back into him.

“Looks like we have to catch a faster tempo.”

Your dance quickly turns into a game—a game of Minho trying to see how fast you can go and of you trying to prove that you can keep up with him. Your feet move quickly even with your heels, swiftly moving back and forth with his own feet as giggles leaving the both of you every time you both come out successful.

“You’re one tough cookie,” Minho jokes.

“It takes more to crack me down, your highness,” you counter.

A pair of figure skating royalties who know exactly how to move with the rhythm of the music; two gold medalists who dance around each other fluidly like water. Minho twirls you away once more, your hands stopping you from going too far, before he pulls you back into him with your faces inches apart and your hand against his chest just as the music comes to a halt.

“Impressive,” Minho laughs, breath hitting your face.

“Finishing teaches you many things. One of those being how to waltz,” you chuckle.

“Are you sure it’s not because you’re a gold medalist figure skater?”

“It could possibly be that as well. I have many talents, Minho.”

He looks at you with a wide, genuine smile on his face.

“I think we’re going to get along just fine, (Y/n),” Minho claims.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

“I’m fucking exhausted,” Minho groans as he throws himself onto the couch behind you. You glance over your shoulder at him, tearing your attention away from the textbook you were reading to give the young prince your attention instead.

“I’m going to assume that you had World Economy today,” you chuckle.

“It’s painfully boring,” he sighs. “I understand what Professor Alina was saying, but dear God that woman is boring.”

“I simply can’t wrap my head around why you picked up Economics when you have no interest in it,” you absentmindedly say while you let your pen move around to highlight the important terms in your textbook.

“I simply can’t wrap my head around how you can tolerate something as boring as Literature,” Minho retorts.

“I find it rather interesting, thank you very much,” you sigh as you fully turn yourself around, arm slinging over the back of the wooden chair to look at him. “And might I remind you that you’re the one who chose something that you don’t enjoy while I chose my own degree.” He silently mocks your words which makes you throw your pen at him. “It’s a bigger wonder as to how I’ve tolerated you these past few weeks,” you shake your head while turning back to the library desk to pull out a new pen from your pencil case.

“I know, I’m such a pain in the ass, aren’t I,” he cries. “‘Woe is me, Prince Minho is such a bore. He’s not the handsome bachelor that I thought he was’.”

“I might just start referring to you that way if you carry on,” you hum.

“Oh, come on, you love me,” Minho claims while sitting up right.

“Of course I do, that’s why I’m friends with you.” He stares at the back of your head, scowling when he realises that you’re no longer paying attention to him.

Minho stands from the library couch and moves in front of your desk, arms crossing over his chest. You don’t pay him any mind and keep your attention to your book instead. He lets out a huff when you don’t look at him, but you still ignore him. Minho purses his lips together and knits his eyebrows together, huffing once again; louder this time.

You learned a week into your friendship that when Minho wants attention, he will do everything in his power to make you give him the attention without outwardly asking you for it. Which is exactly what he was doing right now.

You finally give in with a sigh and look at him without raising your head, “yes, Minho?”

“What are you doing?” he asks.

“I’m analysing Shakespeare sonnets.”

“What’s so interesting about them?”

“Minho, please,” you groan and set your pen on the table. “Could you please just allow me a few minutes to focus? I have an assignment due in a few days and I can’t focus when you’re constantly bothering me.”

“But I’m so bored,” Minho whines loudly.

“You’re acting like a child.”

“Because I’m bored!”

A hiss from the student librarian immediately silences him. You turn to Lia and give her an apologetic wave, but she reassures you with a smile.

“Chan, Hongjoong, and Yeji are planning to watch a movie in an hour,” you say while turning back to Minho, “if I promise to bring you, will you please allow me the hour to focus?”

“Yes, yes, I promise,” Minho nods feverishly, his voice lowering after the warning from Lia.

“Good. Now, sit on the couch and be patient.” He nods once again and plops himself down on the beaten and worn out leather, politely sitting as he waits for the hour to pass.

But Minho is Minho.

And you also learned quickly that Minho isn’t a patient man.

Barely even ten minutes pass before he sighs loudly from behind you. You squeeze your eyes shut in frustration and squeeze them with the thumb and index of your left hand. Attempting to ignore Minho’s whining and moaning, you plug your ears with your headphones and play music to block out the outside world.

Even that proves fruitless.

Minho crouches down beside your chair and rests his cheek against the table, tugging your earphone out and making you hiss at him in annoyance.

“Can we go do something fun together, please?” he asks politely.

“Where are Jisung and Seungmin?” you ask while turning to him.

“They both have classes,” Minho claims with a pout.

“Don’t you have any other classes?”

“Not anymore for the rest of the day,” he shakes his head.

“So, I’m the unfortunate soul you have for the rest of today?”

“Precisely.”

You sigh as you glare at him before you completely give in. You place your pen in the centre of the book to mark your page before shutting it. Minho lets out a victorious ‘yes!’ at the realisation that he’s won while you put your things into your backpack.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

“(Y/n)?” your father calls, his footsteps getting louder as he approaches the living room. You immediately stand up and turn to the entrance. “Aila mentioned that you have a friend over?” he asks just as he pushes open the door. His eyes widen at the sight of Minho standing a distance from you with his hands clasped in front of himself. “Oh. Prince Minho. I hadn’t realised you were friends with (Y/n).”

“We’re in the same university, sir,” he explains while bowing slightly.

“No formalities in this house. My daughter may have been sent to finishing school, but it’s only because we wanted her to be better with the rest of the family,” your father explains.

“‘Them’, father,” you correct.

“I hadn’t realised that you already told the prince.” His eyes are apologetic, but you reassure him with a smile. “Well, make yourself at home, your highness. If you’d like to spend the night in the guest room, I could always inform your parents since we’re quite close.”

“O-Oh, no, it’s fine,” Minho quickly shakes his head.

“Minho was bothering me while I was in the university’s library, so I brought him here to keep him occupied with the dart board while I study,” you explain with your hand gesturing to the books splayed across the coffee table. Your father’s lips part in realisation, amusement flashing across his face for a second.

“I’ll leave you to it, then.” He clears his throat to stifle his laughter when Minho’s face turns red. “If you need anything, just let any of the housekeepers know. And—uhm—if you’re hungry, there’s a box of chocolates in the mini fridge.” Your father extends his hand towards the silver fridge in the corner of the living room. “Do help yourself to it, your highness.”

The moment your father leaves the room, Minho scurries over to the fridge and pulls the small, golden box out and returns to the couch.

You look at the box of your chocolates and sigh softly. You turn your attention to your books for the nth time today and start reading the notes, your attention instead being caught by the box of chocolates slowly being slid towards you.

“Sorry,” Minho apologises with a mouthful of chocolate. Your head turns to look at him and you give him a soft smile.

“I’m sorry for being really snappy today. I’m afraid the workload has been getting a bit more taxing than I had initially imagined, you mutter as you push it back towards him. You sigh softly when you see the way Minho looks at you like a child guilty of breaking something, chocolate staining the corner of his lip as.

“I’m sorry for being really annoying,” Minho apologises. “I don’t blame you for acting like this.”

“I wouldn’t blame you either,” you chuckle. “Economics truly is a bore. I would end up as frustrated with it as you are.” He smiles slightly and pushes the box back in your direction.

“Thank you for tolerating me.”

You take one of the chocolates out of the box and pop it into your mouth, “thank you for sharing.”

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

Minho pulls up outside your home, Jisung and Seungmin glancing at the mansion before taking a double-take. It’s the same size as Minho’s mansion, but somehow it looks even more grand than his. The outside is white and pristine. The driveway surrounding the large fountain in front of the building is lined with rose bushes and a perfectly green garden.

“Holy shit,” Jisung breathes out when he sees the garden.

“I know right,” Minho chuckles while turning the engine off.

“How in the world…” Seungmin trails off, his voice a whisper as he steps out of the car with Minho and Jisung.

“It’s bigger than yours,” Jisung claims.

“Shut up,” Minho snaps, his eyes holding the familiar mischievous glint that makes Jisung snicker. “Remember; their friends are here too. We’re gonna have a little movie night, courtesy of their parents, and you guys can’t say dumb shit in front of them,” Minho warns as he locks the door and leads the two up the stairs. He pauses in his footsteps and turns around, “I do not care that you guys sometimes hang out with them, but please don’t say anything dumb.” Jisung and Seungmin share a look and nod obediently.

“Remind us how you guys became so close again. I feel like you two never actually went into it but we hang out with (Y/n) and their friends every few weeks now.” The prince glances at Jisung and shrugs.

“It just worked. It probably helped that we always seemed to be in each others’ circles, but we never actually spoke until a few months ago,” he explains just as he rings the doorbell. “It felt like I kept seeing them everywhere and I just… approached them when I saw them when they were at one of my parents’ events.”

“So the stars just aligned?” Seungmin questions just as the door opens to reveal one of the housekeepers.

“Something like that,” Minho shrugs.

“Are you here for her highness’s gathering?” the man asks.

“Yes,” he nods.

“Her highness is still in her bedroom. I can take you to the cinema room where the rest of her friends are waiting.” The trio follow the man throughout the mansion, Seungmin and Jisung with their eyes glued to the ivory interior and almost bumping into one of the giant pillars in the entrance hall. “Do patiently wait until her highness arrives,” the housekeeper says as he pushes open one of the large sets of doors.

The entire room is the same ivory walls with subtle gold accents, a large black couch lining all sides of it and a projected screen hanging from the wall at the right side of the room. It’s huge for a cinema room. The centre of the room has a floor that looks more like panels than tiles.

“Why does it look like that?” Seungmin questions when he sees it, completely missing the three of your friends perched on one end of the couch.

“I think it’s best if you wait for (Y/n) to explain that,” Hongjoong chuckles. The film student whips his head up at the sound of his voice, his cheeks flaring when he realises that they’re all watching him.

“I have a feeling I know what it is, but I’m not going to make a guess until they’re here,” Minho hums as he plops himself on the opposite end of the couch. “Haven’t spoken to you guys in a while,” he says while watching the three. “How have you been?”

“I feel like the urge to drop out just keeps getting stronger and stronger,” Chan jokes with a laugh.

“Oh, that sounds amazing right now,” Yeji groans while throwing her head back. “What I’d give for just a whole year of no assignments and no extra year of studying.”

“Maybe we should all just drop out,” Jisung suggests. “A pact where we all just hide in (Y/n) and Minho’s houses.”

“You know, my parents most likely wouldn’t notice if you guys snuck around our mansion. They barely even spend time anywhere other than their chambers, the dining hall, and the ballroom,” Minho snorts. “They wouldn’t even notice if a whole family of five moved into the mansion.”

“Is that a yes?”

“It’s a very big ‘maybe’, Sung,” he chuckles.

“I’m taking that chance and I’m staying over for a few days to see how long before it takes your father to notice I’m there,” Jisung giggles mischievously as he plops his head down on Minho’s lap.

The doors open and you step into the room in a black hoodie and sweats.

“Oh! You guys are here!” you gasp in slight surprise when you see Minho and his friends. “No one told me that you already arrived.”

“The guy who let us in just told us to wait for you,” Seungmin says as he sits down beside Jisung. You give him a weird look but quickly brush it off and sit yourself in between Minho and Chan.

“You stink,” he states when you look at him. You scoff and immediately stand back up, “no! I was joking—sit back down.”

“I thought so,” you huff and sit back down. You look around the room, noting the fact that Minho’s usual bodyguard isn’t around. You think through the options in your mind before you look at him in surprise, “you drove here?”

“Yeah,” Minho nods. “They didn’t think Aki needed to follow me since I was coming here.” You breathe out an ‘oh’. It was always relatively surprising for you whenever Minho was without a bodyguard.

“Hey, (Y/n)?”

“Yes, Jisung.”

“Why does the floor look like that?” You look down at where Jisung is pointing and towards the panelled floor.

“Could everyone lift their feet off of the floor, please?” you ask and look between everyone in the room who obliges, bringing their legs up and sitting cross-legged. You reach towards a small black remote beside you and press the red button on it.

The room goes silent as everyone patiently waits for something to happen, when there’s a vague sound of metal whirring and the panel splits in two, pulling apart to reveal a pool.

“What the fuck?!” Jisung gasps as he shoots upright.

“The leather of this couch has been coated with a waterproof coating for this very reason,” you explain, “my parents were unsure on whether or not it was a good idea to have this in here with how it would be rather difficult to maintain, but they decided to go on with it. I would’ve asked you to bring along your swimming wear, but I hadn’t thought of you even noticing the pattern being a bit off.”

“Are we allowed to dip our feet in it?” Chan questions. His question doesn’t even feel like he’s asking for permission with the way he’s already rolling up his sweats.

“Feel free to,” you nod, “the black cabinet on the wall is filled with towels. You can use them if needed; just remember to leave them in the white cabinet right beside it.”

“This is so cool,” Hongjoong breathes out a laugh as he slides down the couch to let his feet dangle in the water.

“What are we watching?” Seungmin asks when he sees you reaching for another remote.

“I was planning on a more lighthearted film for Chan’s sake, but I decided on A Quiet Place because Hongjoong insisted.”

“I’m never paying for your lunch ever again,” Chan grumbles as you start the movie.

“You’ve never paid for it anyway,” Hongjoong argues.

“Hush,” Yeji hisses, which effectively silences the pair.

“Have you watched this before?” Minho whispers, but you shake your head.

“I don’t actually watch movies unless there are other people watching with me,” you say softly.

“Really?”

You nod your head, yes. Minho pulls away slightly and simply stares at you for a second before he returns his attention to the movie. He doesn’t want to disturb the silence, but he’s curious to know more about you. If you don’t watch movies that often on your own, then what do you watch? Or do you just not watch anything at all?

The movie carries on in silence. Chan disturbs after the first minute or two to ask for your permission to submerge himself into the water with only his boxers on, to which you grant it to him.

The first scene where the monster appears on screen causes Chan to jump and scream, the water splashing all over the couch and on you, Yeji, Seungmin, Jisung, and Minho.

“Dude?!” Minho gasps.

“Sorry! Fuck!” Chan squeaks sheepishly as he gathers himself and scooches closer to Yeji’s ankles. You wipe the droplets of water off of your face, silently laughing to yourself when you see how shaken up he’s gotten from barely even the first twenty minutes.

“Not joining them?” you ask when the movie hits the half hour mark and Jisung slides himself into the pool with Chan, looking close to passing out.

“I don’t really like being in water without any kind of swimming trunks,” Minho says while shaking his head. “Maybe another time.”

You lean closer to Minho out of instinct from the movie’s eerie music and ambiance. The prince barely questions it and slings his arm over your shoulders, pulling you closer to him as he grabs the dark blue blanket sitting beside him and drapes over your curled up frame.

Mere months of spending time together and the two of you had gotten closer as friends. Your hovering touches turned into more welcoming hugs and cuddles when needed. The others barely minded your skinship since you were relatively more open to it and so were Minho’s friends.

But the moment you’re comfortably curled up in Minho’s side, Seungmin glances at the both of you for a split second. He notes the way you have your head on his shoulder and the way Minho barely bats an eye at the way you had silently leaned up to him, but Seungmin stays silent and turns his attention back to the movie.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

“Do you have any plans for this weekend?” you ask as you hand Minho a bag of potato chips.

“Why?” He takes the bag and gives you a curious look.

“Hongjoong, Chan, and I are planning on taking (Y/n) to the beach this weekend. It’s been getting hotter and we all need a break from all of our assignments,” Yeji says as she rolls over on your bed so that she’s laying on her stomach and facing the two of you who are sitting on a pair of beanbags in the corner of your room.

Hongjoong, Jisung, and Chan have busied themselves with the dart board hanging on your wall, screaming and cheering every once in a while whenever someone lands the darts.

Seungmin’s perched at your desk chair, comfortably sitting on his own with one of your books in his hand. He had taken a liking to your bookshelf of old literature and browsed through it for a few minutes before deciding on a collection of William Blake poems.

Yeji has been on your bed and scrolling through her phone for the past two hours. Every once in a while, she raises her head to show you a funny meme that one of her other friends, Felix, had sent to her.

You and Minho sit on your bean bags with your own laptops and a shared bag of potato chips. You’re finishing one of your assignments while Minho binges Bojack Horseman on his own. It’s not silent, but the environment is comfortable enough for you to be able to focus, undisturbed and willingly pulling yourself away to see what the others are up to.

“Uhm… (Y/n)?” You look away from your laptop only to see Yeji sitting upright and looking at her phone with uncertainty on her face. You hum in response and she hands you the gadget. On the screen is an article with pictures of you and Minho at a mall with ‘SKU’S NEW ROYAL COUPLE?’ headlining the top in big, bold letters.

“This is nothing but tabloid, Yeji,” you reassure her as you return her phone. By now, you’re already used to the kinds of articles that would be written about you and the people around you. It’s happened to any member of the royal family

“What was it?” Minho asks.

“It’s another rumour about us,” you sigh, focusing your attention back on your assignment, fingers clicking away at the keys of your laptop. “Tabloids never worry me. They’re nothing but rumours.”

“These guys have nothing better to do,” he hums. “If they can’t force royals into a scandal, they can make rumours on our public relationships. Since we aren’t as important anymore with modern government, royals are treated like celebrities.”

“Should they find anything they can make an article about that will give them clicks and views, they do as they wish. It’s the reason why I pay no mind to them; nothing but rumours,” you lift your head and smile at Yeji, “nothing but lies.”

“So… you guys are totally cool with these things?” Yeji asks.

“Something like that,” Minho nods as he diverts his attention back to his Netflix. She looks between the two of you before shrugging and laying back down.

“Minho.”

“Yeah?”

“Could you read this, please? Let me know if it sounds alright.” He obliges without hesitation, switching his laptop with yours and letting you watch the rest of the episode while he reads through the entire essay.

“Do you guys have any tournaments coming up?” Hongjoong asks as he plops himself right beside Yeji, assumingly because the dart game started to get boring.

“Not until the New Year,” you shake your head. “My coach thinks it’s better that I focus on my academics.”

“I have one in the summer, but it’s state level,” Minho says.

“Minho’s training only gets more intense towards the month before, so we have plenty of time to hang out before then,” Jisung hums as he throws himself right onto Hongjoong’s back, the performing arts student screaming when he does.

“Oh no…” you trail off when you watch the chaos erupt.

Jisung won’t get off of Hongjoong’s back, Yeji is trying to avoid being hit or grabbed by Hongjoong’s violently swaying arms, Chan is so very desperately trying to pull Jisung off and Seungmin has finally pulled his attention away from the book he was reading.

You, Minho, and Seungmin watch from your own spots as Hongjoong cries out with his arms flying all over the place. He grabs Yeji by the ankles and she exclaims at the sudden action, unfortunately being pulled into the mess while Chan moves to try to pull her away.

“Hongjoong, let me go!” she cries out while kicking at his hands.

“Get him off of me!” Hongjoong groans while still trying to push Jisung off. “Why are you so heavy?! I swear you were so small last year!”

“I gained a lot of muscle this year, dude,” Jisung giggles as he finally decides to pull himself up. “You have funny reactions.”

“I hate you,” he pants.

“Be nice to my Jisungie,” Minho hums. He had been completely unphased throughout the entire affair and kept most of his attention to your essay. “It’s good,” he says as he finally hands switches your laptops.

“Really?” You take the device and read through the first paragraph yet again.

“Yeah, I haven’t read Beowulf but it makes sense. Speaking of, what’s the deal with that guy?” Minho laughs.

“Beowulf’s in a silly mood,” you joke as you save the file before closing your laptop. “Now what?”

“Well, we came over here to bother you while you were doing your assignment, but you’re done with that now,” Yeji hums.

“And we couldn’t even bother you,” Chan adds. “You never give us attention whenever we try to bother you.”

“You guys don’t try hard enough, that’s why,” you laugh. “Either that, or I’ve simply gotten too used to Minho bothering me all of the time.”

“I once made them so frustrated that they took me here and their father gave me their chocolates,” Minho laughs while closing his own laptop and puts it away in his bag.

“You were so very annoying that day,” you grumble.

“Minho annoys everyone,” Seungmin laughs from the other end of your room. He stands up with a small grunt and makes his way to your expansive bookshelf to put away the book exactly where he had taken it from. “I’m not surprised that he’s the most likely to break your focus out of all of us.”

“Hold on—since everyone’s not focused on anything else now—beach this weekend?” Hongjoong suggests, pushing himself upright to look around the room. “We can get an AirBnB around the area, leave Friday evening and come back Sunday evening.”

You turn to Minho when you feel him brushing your elbow and give him a questioning look. “What do you think?”

“It should be fine if I tell mother and father that you’re joining. They can always refer to your parents if they don’t trust me,” you say.

“Your bodyguards are also completely free to join, by the way,” Hongjoong continues. “But I’d feel bad if they didn’t at least join us at the beach, so ask them to bring their own swimsuits too.”

“Would you even be able to convince Aki to join us in the water?” you snort as you turn to Minho.

“I can barely even convince that man to eat lunch with me in the campus cafeteria sometimes,” he rolls his eyes with a laugh. “Although, I’ve noticed that he’s been a bit more casual ever since Lyra started joining us.”

“Lyra is casually formal, I think. She still speaks and acts very formally, but somehow she does it in a way that comes off as more casual than what I believe people are mostly used to,” you explain. “For my entire childhood, my classmates and teachers hadn’t found her that intimidating unless she needed to be.”

While Minho’s bodyguard had failed to become more casual with him, your personal bodyguard had a brighter aura to her. She was bubbly and jovial, extroverted and social enough to make friends with anyone. Her connections were valued to your parents and her initiative and determination in keeping you safe was what made them choose her to care for you ever since you were a child.

“Aki could not be casual around me to save his own life,” Minho jokes, “I’ve asked him a million times to be more casual with me, but he doesn’t want to.”

“Trutfully, Minho, you are rather intimidating,” you state.

“They’re not wrong,” Jisung nods in agreement. “You are very intimidating. The first time Seungmin and I saw you, we were more scared of your face than Aki.”

“Mhm, we can vouch for that,” Yeji hums.

“What?” Minho scoffs in disbelief. “I’m not that intimidating.”

“You truly are,” you shake your head. The prince looks at you with shock written all over his face. “One of the reasons I hadn’t approached you myself was because you always looked so bored during events.”

“Okay, but that’s because the events are actually boring,” he defends.

“Your face tells the people around you that you’d like to set the entire ballroom on fire, Minho—I truly would not be surprised if that’s the reason Aki is scared of being casual with you.”

“Is that true?” Minho looks around the room and all six of them nod. He has to admit that he feels slightly deflated at the revelation.

“I hadn’t meant it as a bad thing,” you reassure him, hand reaching on to hold onto his forearm gently. “I think it’s a charm that you can use to keep bad intentions away.”

“You think so?”

“Of course I do,” you nod.

“Dude, haven’t you noticed that the worst people on campus still haven’t approached you? You’ve been here for the past two years and you’d think that the ‘It’ group would’ve tried making friends with you, but they haven’t,” Hongjoong points out. “They’re all scared of you.”

“Even the campus devil is scared of you,” Yeji claims.

“Why did you guys approach me then?” Minho asks, eyes diverting to Jisung and Seungmin. The pair share a look before shrugging in unison.

“You seemed like a cool dude,” Jisung admits.

“There wasn’t anything wrong with you. You just looked scary,” Seungmin claims.

“We just assumed that gave yourself a resting bitch face because you’re, technically, seen as a celebrity. Either that or you were just born with it,” he adds. Minho turns back to you, but you only smile in response.

“It’s not a bad thing, alright?” you reassure him as you squeeze his arm gently. Relief floods his chest at the reassurance you give him.

Minho lets out a sigh and smiles, “so… beach this weekend?”

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

Arriving at the AirBnB, you and Minho were quick to make your way to the bedroom you decided on sharing. The first thing you noticed in the process of unpacking was the fact that Yeji, Jisung, Chan, Hongjoong, and Seungmin still hadn’t arrived yet, which led to Minho calling Jisung to check in on them.

“How much longer are you guys gonna take?” Minho asks into the phone as you start unpacking your bag. “Four hours?!” The exclamation tears you away from your bag for a moment, but you decide to only listen instead of completely turning your attention to the conversation.

“... it’s Chan’s fault for not checking his tires…” Jisung’s voice is vaguely heard by you and it makes you look away from your duffle bag to look at Minho, your hands stopping and resting among your clothes.

“Jeez, alright,” he sighs. “(Y/n) and I are already here, so we’ll probably hang out around the beach before you guys get here. Yeah, it’s no problem. We’ll find something to eat, too. We did a small grocery run before we got here. Yeah. Yeah—dude, seriously, it’s no problem… a little bit. I’m starting to think that we should’ve taken the same car. Yes; I know that you guys are all living in the dorms, but I’m just say—Jisung—I’m just—God! Fine! Just let us know when you guys are nearby.”

Minho hangs up the call and taps on his screen a few times before he locks it and places it on the bed. He plops himself beside you and starts unpacking his own bag.

“Four hours?” you repeat.

“That’s what he said,” Minho nods with a sigh. “It’s fine. It’s still bright out, so we could just head on over to the beach now and watch the sunset.”

“I’m not opposed to that,” you claim as you start searching for your swimsuit. “We can convince Lyra and Aki to join us in the water. “

“You could probably convince Lyra, but I’m not so sure about Aki,” he chuckles.

“Did you ask him to bring swimming wear?”

“I did, but it’s not a promise as to whether or not he actually did,” Minho says as he rummages through his bag. “By the way, what do you want to eat? I doubt they’ll actually be here on time for dinner.”

On the four hour trip to the beach, Aki was kind enough to stop by a grocery store to buy food for everyone. Three hours into the tripand Lyra had convinced him to stop at a Family Mart along the way to buy snacks for everyone.

“You never know,” you hum, “but in the chance that they don’t arrive by then, we can always cook something for the four of us. Whatever food is leftover can be shared with the others.”

“But what do you want to cook?”

“We can run through what we bought at the grocery store and figure something out later.” You zip up the top of your bag and stand up, “now, I’m going to change in the bathroom, so you can change in here, and we can talk about food afterwards.”

“Alright,” Minho nods.

You disappear into the bathroom and leave the prince to his own company. It’s not much of a surprise to your friends that you two chose each other as roommates the moment the options were given; especially after Seungmin asked for his own room because, according to him, ‘Jisung talks in his sleep’.

Yeji chose to share a room with Chan only after he promised to keep his shirt on and Jisung chose the couch since he sleeps pretty much anywhere and everywhere.

When you had brought the plan to Lyra and Aki, they both had chosen their own rooms on both sides of yours and Minho’s. They didn’t want to share a room with the both of you for the sake of your privacy but preferred being in at least the same area just in case anything would happen—in which you reassured them that the chances of anything going south were low.

Minho pauses for a moment in the middle of putting his swimsuit on. Your phone had lit up on the dressing table of the bedroom and your lock screen is a picture Chan had taken while you were at a Christmas party the year before. His hand drops from zipping his suit up halfway as he takes a step closer to pick up your phone.

It was one of the first times you had ever been to a party that wasn’t formally prepared by another royal family, and you and your friends went back to Minho’s place for the rest of the night where he had gotten drunk and threw you over his shoulder.

The memory is fresh in Minho’s head despite the few months that had passed. He remembers the night so fondly mainly because it was the first time he had truly seen you so happy.

Minho’s attention is so fixed on your phone that he doesn’t even hear you stepping out of the bathroom and staring at his back in confusion. “Minho?”

“You have this as your lock screen?” he asks as he turns around. You stare at the image for a moment before it finally hits you on which picture you had saved as your lock screen.

“Yeah,” you nod while approaching him and taking the device from his hands, “it was one of the best nights of my life—how could I not?” You look at the picture as well and laugh, “don’t you remember Yeji spilling her drink all over Hongjoong? He was more upset over the fact that she accidentally stepped on his shoes over the fact that he was drenched in alcohol.”

“Yeah, I do,” Minho laughs. You pull your phone back and smile at the image as you sit at the edge of your bed. He feels his heart warming, smiling fondly as he sits beside you. “Do you actually remember what happened after I threw you over my shoulder because I completely blacked out after that.”

“Well,” you sigh as the memory runs through your head. “Seungmin threw a cushion at you to put me down right after Chan took the photo. You almost dropped me. You had gotten frustrated with how you weren’t able to speak properly in your state. Jisung had to convince you to put me down safely.”

“I have a very vague memory of me trying to throw you out the window,” he wonders.

“Yeah, Jisung had to make you put me down safely after you tried to throw me out the window,” you clarify with a chuckle. “All was fine. After you put me down, you laid down on my bed and started mumbling about the suit you had accidentally spilled champagne on before falling asleep.”

“Was I that wasted?”

“You were worse than Yeji on her birthday,” you joke. Minho gawks at you.

“No way…”

“You really were, Minho,” you giggle.

“No fucking way—worse than Yeji?”

“Quite so. I had never seen you acting as extremely as the way that you did—it was very entertaining,” you claim.

“I think you’ve all turned me into the equivalent of the jester,” he snorts as he lays down. “Nothing but a laughing stock.”

“You have to admit, Minho, you’re quite entertaining in general,” you say as you turn around and place your hand on his knee. “You know that you’re more than just a jester. You’ve given me many things since we’ve met.”

“Such as?” Minho gives you a cheeky look. On one end, he wants you to fuel his ego, but on the other, he’s genuinely curious to know what kind of a place he has in your heart.

“Well, you’ve taught me how to chug alcohol like a lunatic, you’ve taught me how to make fun of funnily dressed royals, and you’ve taught me how to truly discipline my focus during assignment season.” His face contorts into a scowl and you can only smile at his reaction. “On one hand, I’m joking, but on the other; Minho, you’ve taught me how to be more casual with people. You’ve taught me things that I had spent so many years failing to figure out. I hadn’t had that many friends before this, but by meeting you, I have few that I hold so dearly.”

“Does that include me?”

“Yes, that includes you,” you roll your eyes, amused. “I hold you dearly, Minho. Very so. We’ve only been close for a few months, but I can admit that you are the most interesting person I’ve ever met.” Minho keeps his eyes trained on you without saying anything, silently urging you to continue; not because of his ego, but because he’s genuinely curious. “You’re… different,” you say, “I’ve met royals before who prefer a more laid-back and casual lifestyle, but you’re the only Lee Minho I’ve ever met.”

“The one and only,” he smiles. You hadn’t realised that your hand had been on his knee the entire time, your thumb tenderly rubbing over the skin exposed from his swimming shorts.

“You’re my best friend, Minho,” you admit softly. A strange feeling runs throughout Minho’s gut. He’s never heard anyone outright admit to him that they see him as their best friend; Jisung and Seungmin had their own way of doing it, but it was never vocal. He slowly sits upright and takes your hand in his, clasping the other over it.

“And you’re mine, (Y/n),” Minho smiles. Your smile softens into an adoring one as you take your hand out of his. For a moment, he feels disappointed from the sudden pull, until you wrap your arms around his shoulders to pull him into a hug.

“I intend to keep you around for as long as I am able to.” Minho lets out a contented sigh as he wraps his arms around you as well, burying his face in your shoulder.

“(Y/n),”

“Yes, Minho.” You don’t pull away from him, but he feels the way your head turns towards him slightly.

“I—” Minho, unfortunately, gets cut off when there’s a knock at the door.

“Your highnesses,” Lyra calls from the other side “We’re packing food to bring to the beach; would you like us to bring the sandwiches you bought from Family Mart?”

You pull away from Minho too quickly for his liking, standing up to open the door completely. “That would be lovely, thank you, Lyra,” you nod.

“Oh, also…” The bodyguard takes a step into the room and quietly closes the door, leaning her back against the wood as she looks at Minho. “Aki would never admit this to you, but he is so excited for the beach.”

“Is he?” Minho’s eyes widen in surprise.

“He told me that he loves the beach, but your family doesn't visit it that often. This is his first time in a while and he’s absolutely thrilled,” she snickers.

“I would kill to see him playing in the water,” he breathes out a laugh.

“We must move quickly, then,” you urge as you take Minho’s hand. “Lyra, pack the basket. We won’t tell Aki anything.”

“As you wish,” Lyra giggles right before she leaves the room. You tug Minho towards the door after she leaves but he stops you, pulling your arm back and trapping you in his embrace.

“Thank you,” he hastily breathes out as his arms tighten around you. “Thank you for being my friend. Thank you for tolerating me. I seriously cannot thank you enough.” As Minho holds you, he doesn’t realise it, but he’s praying that you love him as much as he loves you.

But Minho himself doesn’t even realise just how much he loves you.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

“No,” you state simply. Minho bites his lip in an attempt to contain the cheeky look on his face as he chases after you.

“Come on! It’s a grand idea, (Y/n)!” You shake your head at his persuasion, walking away from the park and away from him.

“I refuse,” you state.

Minho had a thought, and when this man has a thought, he thinks he’s a genius. But Minho also doesn’t really think that often in general, which makes his thoughts even more of a rare and more of a spontaneous occurrence.

“We’ll be matching at the Halloween party! Don’t you want to match with your best friend?” He grabs onto your elbow and pulls you towards him while you let out a frustrated whine.

“Minho, please, I would like to not embarrass myself.” You look at him with pleading eyes and a pout, “I just want to look nice this year.”

“You looked nice last year. Now it’s time for you to look ridiculous with me,” Minho giggles with both of his hands holding both of your elbows to stop you from moving away from him.

Admittedly, you would’ve said yes to matching outfits with Minho. The only problem is that Minho is Minho.

And Minho doesn’t choose normal costumes.

“Please, please, please—pretty please!” You stare at him in shock because Minho is bouncing while he pleads.

“Minho—”

“It’ll be so fun, (Y/n), please!” Minho’s hands lower to hold yours as he continues bouncing, “we’ll look so cool.”

“We’ll look atrocious!”

“No, we won’t!”

“How do you dress up as pee?!”

“I never said you had to dress up as pee!”

“I sure am not going to dress up as shit!” Minho’s jaw drops.

“Holy shit,” he breathes out and you give him a confused scowl in response. “That’s the first time I’ve ever heard you swear.”

“Anyone spends enough time with you and their filter completely flies out the window,” you snort. “I’ll suggest an idea; we can dress up as a knife and a fork. I can be the fork and you can be the knife because you like playing with knives.”

“That’s so basic,” Minho scoffs as he takes a step back as though he’s offended that you have the audacity to suggest something like that. “I want something out of the box—something different! Something that’ll make everyone stop and stare at us like, ‘wow, they’re really weird’.”

“That doesn’t mean it has to be related to bodily fluids,” you deadpan. You pull your hands away from Minho and turn your back to him as you continue walking towards the university cafeteria.

“I just think it’ll be funny!” he persists, jogging until he’s following right beside you. “How about this; we can do something that isn’t gross, but it has to be fun.”

“I want it to be cute,” you add.

Minho rolls his eyes but nods nonetheless, “fine, it can be fun and cute.”

“And I want to be the cooler part of the pair.”

“Dude!” You snap your eyes in his direction and glare at him, the look only making him gasp and take a step back. “Who would’ve thought that you, (Y/n), is as cold as you really are.”

“You bring it out of me,” you hum with a mocking smile that you drop not a second later and continue on your way.

“Salt and pepper?”

“You’ll end up being salty about having to be salt.”

“Ugh, then what about Timon and Pumba?”

“Are you admitting to being a furry?”

“(Y/n)!” Minho finally whines out and stomps his feet on the ground like a child. You pay his tantrum no mind and just hold onto his hand as you bring him along.

“Halloween is not for another month, Min. We still have plenty of time to figure it out,” you reassure him with a sigh when his tantrum ceases.

“We’re going to need time to make the costumes and everything though,” he huffs.

“We can buy them online,” you state.

“That’ll still take weeks for it to arrive!”

“Minho, you’re overreacting and you’re making it a bigger deal than it has to be,” you groan as you throw your arms around the place in frustration. You stop walking and turn all of your attention towards him, “I don’t think that Halloween should be that big of a deal! It’s just a costume party.”

“You’re the one that’s overreacting!” Minho claims loudly. “I just wanna do something nice that the both of us can enjoy and have matching costumes!”

A hand rests on your shoulder and you turn your head to see Lyra’s face right beside yours, “your highness, people are watching.” You spare a glance around you to see the amount of students that are actually watching your argument and, from behind Minho, Aki raises his baseball cap to give you a warning look.

“Minho,” you clear your throat and place your hand on his shoulder, “shall we have this discussion in the privacy of one of our homes instead?” You truly can’t bring yourself to understand why Minho is being so difficult. With the way he actually looks frustrated to the point where he’s close to tears, you worry that he might just have a breakdown in the middle of campus.

His eyes frantically look around campus before stopping on you. You knit your eyebrows together in confusion, hand slowly extending towards him. Minho takes a deep breath before he wraps his fingers around your hand.

“It’s okay,” you whisper as you pull him with you. “Lyra, prepare the car.”

“Yes, your highness,” she bows her head before rushing off.

“Minho, we’re going to my place,” you say softly. Minho looks into your eyes, relief seeming to flood him as he nods.

“Okay,” he whispers. You pull him towards you and he obliges, silently following as you guide him to Lyra’s car parked in the driveway to campus. Minho doesn’t say anything throughout the forty minute drive to your house and he doesn’t say anything until you bring him to your room.

“Are you okay?” you ask once you’ve closed your bedroom door.

“I think I’m stressed out,” Minho admits shakily as he avoids eye contact with you. You don’t miss the way he swallows the lump in his throat or the way his hands keep anxiously clenching into fists only for his fingers to stiffly spread out to repeat the process.

“Is it because of all of the assignments?” He shakes his head. “Is it your parents? Are they trying to push you into another proposal?” Minho shakes his head yet again. You purse your lips into a straight line, eyebrows furrowing as you try to figure out exactly what’s going on. You resort to sitting at the edge of your bed and patting the spot beside you.

Minho obliges and sits beside you, your thighs barely touching from the lack of distance between you two.

“I don’t know,” he confesses. “I just feel so… stressed out and anxious for no reason.”

“Well, you don’t exactly need a reason to feel that way,” you reassure Minho. “You can feel whatever you want—you don’t have full control over your emotions.”

“I know that,” Minho claims. “It feels like there’s a lot on my mind right now.”

“Penny for your thoughts?”

“I wouldn’t know what to say, though,” he sighs. “It feels like there’s so many things that I don’t know exactly what’s causing it.”

“That’s alright,” you reassure Minho. Your hand rests on his knee, squeezing the fabric of his jeans gently in an attempt to maybe calm his nerves. “We don’t have to talk about it then. We can find something to do to calm your thoughts.”

“I don’t want to do anything,” Minho mumbles as he falls backwards and lays on your bed.

“Come here,” you urge while patting your thigh. Minho looks between your face and your thigh before obliging, adjusting himself so that his head is comfortably cushioned by your thighs. You start to softly comb your fingers through his hair and sigh, “you have too much in this strange head of yours, Minho. When was the last time you actually took the time to relax?”

“When you have the amount of assignments that I do, there’s barely even time to sleep,” he jokes with a laugh, but his laugh quickly dies down and his face changes. “I’m very tired, (Y/n). I should’ve turned down the tournament last month. I feel like I haven’t had the time to catch up because of it. Even Kara thinks I shouldn’t have.”

“What did Kara say?” you ask.

“When I told her I wanted to do it, she was really hesitant,” Minho starts, “she said that she was worried I would burn myself out. I just told her to let me do it because I really wanted to be in that tournament… I don’t think I was giving myself enough time for anything.” You hum in response, letting him know that you’re still there and you’re still listening as you continue to massage his scalp. “I don’t know… Maybe I should stop skating for a while—at least until I’m done with my final year.”

“Are you sure you want to do that?”

Minho sighs as his eyes look away from you and towards the ceiling, “I honestly don’t know, (Y/n). I don’t think I do, but if I keep skating as often as I do now, I might not be able to focus on school.”

“What if you just don’t skate for the next year?” you suggest. “Forget all of the tournaments between now and 12 months from now and only skate casually. Use it to relieve your stress or when you feel you really want to.”

“One year sounds decent,” he wonders.

“That’s what I’m thinking of doing as well. It’s a bit tiring trying to balance skating and assignments,” you confess. Minho’s gaze meets your eyes once again and the look makes your hands pause in his hair. His brown eyes bore into yours, his habit of blinking multiple times suddenly becoming more prominent the longer you look at him.

You’ve always thought that Minho was extremely handsome, but now, as you look at him, you realise that he may just be more radiant than you initially thought. Your hand lowers to his cheek as you smile fondly.

“What?” he questions, eyebrows knitting together in slight confusion when you don’t say anything.

“Nothing,” you say while shaking your head. “I was just thinking about something.” You pull your hand away from him and lean backwards. Minho’s lips part when you do, almost asking you to bring your hand back, but he quickly stops himself. “So, what’s the plan for Halloween?”

“Jisung wants to have a mega Halloween birthday party.”

You look at him in confusion, “wasn’t his birthday a few days ago?”

“Yeah,” Minho nods, “but he and Seungmin want to have a Halloween costume party for their birthdays, so they’re having a follow-up birthday party of sorts.”

“That… sounds more in character for Jisung than it does for Seungmin,” you point out.

“They work hand-in-hand,” he shrugs with a chuckle, “Jisung’s the mastermind, Seungmin’s the catalyst, and I’m just the enabler. Jisung comes up with wild ideas and Seungmo would pretend he has nothing to do with it when he’s the one making the idea come out worse than the original idea.”

“I see now why you three make such an interesting group of friends.” You let out a small laugh, returning to your previous act of running your hand through Minho’s hair. The prince closes his eyes, relishing in the comforting feeling of your hand that seems to wash away all of his stress and all of the doubts he had before.

But it doesn’t take away the initial cause of his stress.

Seungmo: I’m just saying that you’ve been treating (Y/n) differently

Minho: As in??

Seungmo: Minho I really think that maybe you need to start addressing what kind of a relationship you have with them before one of you gets hurt You’re more accepting to skinship and they can comfort you in seconds

Minho: I treat them like that because they’re my best friend

Seungmo: Then why do you push Jisung’s skinship away? Isn’t he your best friend too?

It was a mild argument that he had with Seungmin earlier in the day, but the idea had lingered in Minho’s head for longer than he initially wanted it to.

Did he really see you in a different light than what he thought he was?

“You’re thinking again, Minho,” you claim quietly. “Let go of your thoughts for a moment.”

“I’m trying,” he mumbles as his eyes open to meet yours. “It’s easier said than done.”

“I worry about you. I’m sorry if I came off as too strong just now,” you apologise.

“It’s alright,” Minho reassures you with a smile. “I knew you were messing around, but I don’t know why I was getting so upset over it. I’m sorry.”

“You know that I’ll always forgive you for these small things,” you claim, your hand lower to cup his cheek with your thumb tenderly running over the skin of his cheekbone. “It takes more than that to scare me off.”

Minho smiles, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he does. You feel a sense of warmth running throughout your body at the sight of his smile. It’s different from the ones you’ve seen before and it fills you with a strange feeling of comfort and safety.

“Thank you,” he thanks after a moment of silence between you two. “You make me feel safe.” Your heart jumps, your lips parting slightly. “I feel like I can tell you everything.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Minho nods. He’s overcome with a sense of pure adoration when he sees the way you smile. His hand hesitates for a moment before it reaches up to your face where he allows his fingers to graze over your cheek.

You both stay like that for a moment before Minho’s snapped out of his trance and is hit with the crashing realisation of what he’s doing. He clears his throat, swallowing thickly as he sits upright.

“Thank you,” Minho repeats. Disappointment fills your mind slightly at the lack of his closeness, but you push it down and smile instead.

“If you ever need anything, Minho, I’ll be here,” you say.

“I know.” He returns the smile, ignoring the single raging realisation that maybe Seungmin was right.

Maybe Minho loves you differently than he had initially thought.

But he can’t help but feel that you don’t love him that way.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

Another event and Minho’s at his regular spot. He had spent the past few months thinking over the relationship that he has with you and after an earful from Seungmin and Jisung, Minho stopped denying the fact that he was in love with you.

He had spent whatever time where he wasn’t with you to think it through. When did Minho even fall in love with you? Why did it take him so long to realise he was falling when his friends had caught on to it before him? He shakes the thought out of his head and straightens his back; Minho can’t afford to be lost in his thoughts during an event.

He surely can’t afford to be looking and staring at you the entire evening either, but that also begs the question of where are you?

Minho hadn’t seen you at all in the past two hours since the event had started and he hadn’t seen your parents either. Were you not attending? Surely if you weren’t, you would’ve let him know beforehand to avoid him constantly looking for you.

But why was Minho so eager to look for you anyway?

He’s used to not talking to anyone for too long the entire night. Even whenever you were around, Minho would spend most of his time hovering around you and following you wherever you would go, but tonight feels different.

Is Minho finally ready to let you know that he loves you?

A whole year together and Minho finally realises just how much he does. He had spent so long mistaking his feelings for platonic love, but he hadn’t realised that he was actually falling in love with you.

Minho had taken your advice of not skating for a while. He told Kara that he wasn’t going to participate in the national Winter tournament and opted on focusing on his school at least until he didn’t feel like he was close to burning out. Right after he had spoken with the coach, Minho felt a weight lifting off of his chest and his first instinct was to tell you about it.

Which only added to the suspicion of his feelings.

The longer Minho thought about it, the more he realised things that he wouldn’t have done if it were anyone else. He wouldn’t have shared a room with anyone if you had chosen to share a room with someone else. He wouldn’t have let anyone hold him as close as you do—and he surely wouldn’t have let anyone touch his hair the way you have.

So Minho is finally going to confess to you. Because right now, all he wants is you. And all he wants is to have you around him. He wants to be able to hold you and tell you just how much he loves you; Minho wants to hold you and call you his.

He wants you to be his to love and he wants to be the one you love.

So Minho stays at his usual spot in the ballroom, angling his head to look above everyone else in an attempt to find you. He feels his heart pounding in his chest. What if you weren’t as in love with him as he thought you were? What if he was reading your signals wrong?

Minho prays that you aren’t in love with someone else. He prays that, even as a royal, you aren’t betrothed to a prince from another region for the sake of a business relationship. He spots the back of your head from a distance, excitement rushing through him as he starts pushing past the crowd and towards you. He catches a glimpse of the black ball gown you’re wearing and the silver clip pinned into your hair, thinking that you look as enchanting as you always do.

Until he hears your laugh. Minho freezes in the middle of the crowd and stares at you. You’re smiling as you talk to a prince that he somewhat recognises; he’s come to his parents’ events a handful of times. Minho feels his world crashing down when he sees the way you’re genuine. All of the fake and polite smiles have disappeared and you look happy as you talk to the prince.

Minho stays in his spot, unable to move as all he sees is you. Maybe you are in love with someone else. His bottom lip trembles, eyes stinging with tears that he forces back as he turns on his heel. Minho makes a beeline towards the entrance to the ballroom and shoves his way past the large wooden doors, the heels of his shoes aggressively clacking against the marble floor. He needs to get away.

He feels like skating.

Minho walks towards the back entrance of the mansion, grabbing a pair of worn out skates that he keeps only for when he’s skating in the man-made frozen lake in his mansion’s backyard—courtesy of his parents. He doesn’t bother grabbing a coat and ignores the way the cold bites at his ears and the tips of his exposed fingers as he storms towards the ice.

He throws the dark blue blazer off and lets it haphazardly fall to the ground, leaving him in only the white button up that definitely isn’t warm enough in the low temperature. Minho shoves his feet into the softened leather of his skates, hastily looping the laces until he’s secure enough to skate.

He doesn’t even bother with stretching as he kicks off, gliding to the centre of the lake. Minho doesn’t follow any routine. He jumps and spins as he pleases. Without any music, he feels more freedom in his movement and in his thoughts. The image of you laughing and talking with the prince stays embedded in his thoughts, the tears that he was so desperately trying to force back coming in at full force and Minho lets out a choked sob as he stops for a moment.

He takes a deep breath, letting out a loud groan of frustration as he wipes away his tears with the back of his hand before he continues. Minho can feel his muscles struggling. Without any stretching and with the lack of warmth, he feels his muscles stiffening faster than they usually would, but he ignores it in favour of trying to at least relieve whatever pain he feels.

Meanwhile, from within the mansion, you bid your friend goodbye. You forgot to let Minho know that you and your family would arrive late for the event and you had left your phone in the car rather than in your purse like you usually would. You look around the ballroom in search of the young prince, but you feel disappointment filling you when you can’t find him.

You purse your lips together with a sigh. Where could he be?

“Excuse me,” you softly call when one of the waitresses approaches you. “Is Prince Minho attending this event?”

“You just missed him, your highness,” the woman says as she lowers her head slightly. “Prince Minho left the mansion almost half an hour ago. Some of the housekeepers have said that he might be in the backyard of the compound.”

“Backyard?”

“Yes, your highness,” she nods. “I can have someone show you the way if you’d like.”

“It’s fine—thank you.” The waitress bows her head slightly before moving past you. You head for the entrance to the ballroom, requesting your coat from one of the staff before you make your way down the white walls and towards the backyard. You have spent long enough in Minho’s mansion to navigate your way through the many hallways without needing much help and you quickly find yourself pushing through the glass door leading to the outside.

You let out a verbal shiver when you feel how cold it’s gotten and wrap your arms around yourself as you start wandering around the garden. The sound of skates scraping against ice makes you turn your head in the direction of the lake, your lips parting when you see Minho kicking himself off into the air as he spins.

Your steps slow as you walk towards the lake. Ice sculptures line the path towards the lake, a large Christmas tree to your right and wreaths hanging from the lamp posts that light up the long path. The closer you get, the more you see Minho in his element. He glides across the ice with less control and more fluidity.

The garden looks magical; as though it’s some sort of winter wonderland, and with Minho making use of the lake, you could say that it’s a scene out of a movie.

Minho spins once, twice, before he catches sight of your frame slowly approaching and loses his balance. You let out a loud gasp when Minho falls onto the ice with a loud thud and a pained grunt. Your first instinct is to laugh, a small giggle leaving past your lips.

He looks cute.

Minho blushes furiously at the sound of your laughing, but it’s barely obvious from the way his cheeks were already red from the cold. You take a step closer to the ice when you see him wobbling as he stands.

“What are you doing out here on your own?” you question.

“I needed to clear my mind,” he mumbles. Your smile drops when you hear the ice in his voice, his eyes looking at his hands as he brushes ice off of them.

“I was looking for you,” you say.

“Well, you looked like you were having a grand time with the prince.” Minho finally looks at you, but his eyes are blank as he looks at you, completely void of emotion.

“What prince…? Oh! You mean Seonghwa? We’re just friends, Minho,” you reassure him. You step onto the ice cautiously; your heels aren’t exactly made for walking on ice, but you manage. “Seonghwa and I used to be close when we were children, but we haven’t had much time to catch up since I left for finishing school.”

“I don’t believe you,” he huffs.

“It’s the truth,” you argue softly. Minho looks away from you and sighs. “Why don’t you believe me?”

“I-I don’t know—you looked happy talking to him, (Y/n). You looked like you were in love with him,” he claims.

“Nonsense,” you laugh in disbelief. “Why would I be in love with Seonghwa?”

“With the way that he looks, I really wouldn’t be surprised.”

“Minho, I don’t love him,” you retaliate when you get closer to him.

“Why not?” He still avoids eye contact with you, looking at anything else but you as his fingers nervously rub against the palms of his hands.

“I love you,” you confess. Minho’s breath hitches in his throat and his eyes immediately lock with yours, his habit of blinking constantly becoming more and more constant. Until he breathes out a laugh and shakes his head.

“No, you don’t.”

You let out a scoff, “what do you mean?”

“I mean that you don’t, (Y/n),” he states. “Why would you even be in love with me when you have someone like Park Seonghwa in your circle? Everyone wants him. Why would you be any different?”

“Because he’s like my brother,” you retort. “Seonghwa and I grew up together; I’ve gotten sick of his habits already, but he’s not you.”

“You’re just saying that.”

“It’s the truth.”

“I don’t believe you.”

You look at him in disbelief, anger starting to rise in your chest. Or was it the crushing feeling of Minho rejecting your confession purely out of jealousy? You shake your head—it doesn’t matter. “Whatever,” you spit, “if you’re going to act like this, then I’m going back inside. It’s too cold out here.” Your voice waivers as you speak and Minho doesn’t miss the way your eyes gloss over as you cross your arms over your chest, turning around to walk away from him.

Panic rises and he chases after you, “n-no, (Y/n).” Minho reaches for your wrist when you start walking faster.

But the world has funny ways of bringing you two together and you lose your footing against the slippery ice, stumbling forward. You shut your eyes when you fall, bracing yourself for the impact, but instead, you’re met with warmth and the soft feeling of Minho’s chest. Your eyes open to see him staring at you with wide eyes, heavily breathing as he looks at you in concern.

“Are you alright? Y-You’re not hurt, are you? God, I’m sorry—y-you shouldn’t even be on the ice in the first place,” he rambles as he helps you stand up right. “I’m sorry, (Y/n). You’re allowed to walk away if you need some space, but I’ve been so on edge lately because I just wanted to tell you that—” Minho’s cut off when he feels your lips against his, eyes widening even further as he tries to process what you’re doing until you pull away and stare at him. “That… I love you.”

“You have a funny way of expressing your feelings,” you chuckle as you raise your hand to his cheek. “I wanted to tell you tonight, but I forgot to let you know that I was going to be arriving late and by the time I got here, you were nowhere to be seen.”

“I wanted to tell you tonight as well,” Minho claims, returning the chuckle with a sheepish smile, “but I saw you with Seonghwa and I just assumed that you were probably engaged or in love with him.”

“That’s ridiculous,” you say while shaking your head. “My parents aren’t so eager in arranging my marriages. They’ll only suggest it if I’m getting older and I don’t seem to have anyone of interest. I realise that I’ve been in love with you for quite a while, but I didn’t know whether you even loved me back.”

“No. No, I’ve been in love with you for so long,” Minho quickly reassures you. He holds onto your hands and pulls you closer, “my dumbass didn’t even realise it until Seungmin pointed it out. I was denying it because I wasn’t sure if you liked me back either.”

“I guess we’re both idiots,” you giggle. Minho bites his lip, eyes shifting to your lips for a moment before he leans in. He takes in the way you kiss him back, arms wrapping around your shoulders as he deepens it for a moment. The lingering taste of champagne and chocolate left on your lips becomes more and more intoxicating until Minho wills himself to pull away.

His breath comes out ragged from both the cold and the kiss, eyes staring into yours lovingly, “I love you. You have no idea how good it feels to finally tell you this—I love you, (Y/n).”

“I love you too, Minho,” you smile. “And as much as I’d love to be here for longer, you’re not wearing a coat and your parents will definitely be looking for you.”

“Let’s head back inside,” he suggests as his hands lowers to hold onto yours. He carefully guides you back to the edge of the ice and crouches down to untie his shoelaces while you fetch his blazer from the ground, draping it over his shoulders. Minho mutters a ‘thanks’ as he stands up, smiling at you as he holds your hand with his skates in the other.

As you start walking down the path leading to his mansion, you catch a glimpse of white slowly falling in front of you. Minho catches it as well, the both of you stopping to look at the sky only to see snowflakes gingerly floating down.

“The first snowfall,” Minho breathes out in awe.

“Quick, make a wish,” you excitedly gasp. Minho turns back to you and his heart melts at the sight of you with your hands clasped together and your eyes shut. When you open them again you look at him with curious eyes, “did you wish for anything?”

“Of course I did,” he nods.

“What did you wish for?”

“I can’t tell you,” Minho scoffs playfully as he takes your hand once again, “it won’t come true if I do.”

“Whatever you say,” you laugh. Minho pulls you closer so that he’s able to stuff your hand into the pocket of his blazer, holding it in the newfound warmth. He glances at you as you look around the garden, watching the snow falling with pure adoration in your eyes at how magical and enchanting the garden looks.

Minho would never tell you his wish out of fear that it wouldn’t come true. Even if the jinx is fake, he wouldn’t tell you at all. Minho doesn’t want you to know just how much he loves you.

He doesn’t want you to know just how much he wishes that you’ll be by his side forever.

[hyperfixated-homo]

oc art go

this is celerity! we call her cel for short :D (its not her real name but anyone she actually cares about calls her that) im gonna write some stuff about her under the cut

she's part of a group of five teenagers that regularly find themselves in traumatising situations that the rest of the world would make them go to therapy for. specifically, her father is the owner of an organised crime ring (co-owner, the other owners kid is one of her besties kekw). she's been fighting since she was a kid, trying to learn every way to kill a man so that one day she could be number one and finally get his attention. or at least, she used to be. then she met four people who actually cared about her without all the murder killy nonsense, and she spends her time learning how to control herself.

she has lightning powers. they're spontaneous and emotional, just like she is. hard to use except in the heat of the moment. she's also exceptionally fast, both personality wise and physically. that was what gave her the nickname celerity (celerity, noun: swiftness of movement).

she dresses in a lot of bright colors, reds and pinks specifically. they're sort of byproducts of her trying to find ways to get her fathers attention, neon and impossible not to look at so that it would make people actually look at her.

her lightning powers often manifest in her eyes, and in cases where she's very emotional she can spark around them. the adrenaline helps her forget in the moment, but the aftermath is some pretty prominent scarring around her eyes.

she also has a ton of nicks from training, both by herself and with her friends.

she's a very extroverted person, and not at all afraid of confrontation. not super smart, but very well versed in body language and she knows how to push someone's buttons. in a sort of strange juxtaposition, she also is very good at calming people down. both are traits that she learnt from spending time with fighters that work for her dad (who treated her better than he ever did lowkey).

her speciality in the group is distractions and getaways. her agility and knack for making a scene makes her the perfect person to keep a large group occupied. even if she isn't quite as efficient at takedowns, she's can keep them focused on her long enough to wait for the others to arrive (and the thrill of the fight is worth the effort).

she's hyperactive. can't stop moving at any moment. part of it is the need for attention i mentioned earlier and part of it is that she's so used to movement at every turn around her that any sort of silence or quiet or stillness needs to be filled at all times. she often hums to herself in order to fill the air around her.

she's somewhere on the aro spectrum (not ace, but maybe lesbian? idk we're both still figuring that out). uses she/her pronouns but honestly dgaf.

her music taste is hyperpop. thats all you need to know.

anyways my mom is yelling at me so im going to bed hope you like her bye!

[hausofmamadas]

so like i've joked about it before sksks but this reblog.... i coould be wrong now, but i'm fairly fucking certain this is the first reblog that is actually as long as the fic

It gives you different markers now, different structures to shape the friendship around.

Okay I am already loving the establishment of the history, the length of the relationship and then how that’s changed as they’ve grown older cause really it would be so hard to stay friends with someone who has maybe a bit of a Peter Pan complex only with more coke involved sjsjsjsjsjsj

Simple. There you were, there he was. Now, you have to pencil him in like any other obligation.

I cant remember exactly what you said but you actually complimented me on something like this at one point?? And you called it something academic and literary and fancy that I can’t remember rn bc I know nothing of nothing and you have a whole ass master’s degree in the thing but like the simplicity of the language and sentence structure here makes this so much more powerful. Like I’m always trying to condense what I write bc I feel like I’m way too wordy and there are times where it really just s l a p s so much fucking harder to state something plainly

He isn’t an obligation. You try not to let him feel like one.

OHHHHHHHHH MY THIS IS JUST 🥺🥺🥺 BUT THEN ALSO THE CONTRADICTIINS OF LIKE THEY JUST SAID HES BECOME LIKE ANY OTHER OBLIGATION EVEN THO THEY DONT WANT HIM TO BE OR DONT WANT TO THINK OF HIM THAT WAY AT LEAST LIKE UUGH MY HEART ALREADY

‘Finally,’ is how he greets you, when you see him at last.

STORITTOTPPPPPPPPO MY TINY GRINCH HEART CANNOT CAAAANNOT TAKE IT, JUST HOW RAFA THIS REALLY FUCKING IS. LIKE I CAN HEAR IT SO PERFECTLY “por fin” im crying

He doesn’t comment on the mess, the mismatched furniture, the dishes, the piles of books and paints across the dining table.

SKSKSKSKSKSKSKSKSJS the prospect of Rafa like crashing at your place for a visit and criticizing the furniture is so funny to me bc he wouldn’t bc literallt sksksks the man does not have a single leg to stand on when it comes to decor KEKW

‘Dios mio,’ you laugh, ‘you actually did it, Rafi.’

OKAY ON MY LIIIIIIIIIFE, RAFI???? RAFI. MY MIND IS BROKEN. ITS THE SWEETEST NICKNAME. IDK HOW NO ONE EVER CALLED HIM THAT ON THE SHOW. I LOVE IT IDK WHY BUT I LOVE IT SO MUCH

‘I thought you’d smoke too many of the samples and forget what you were doing, tonto.’

SCREAMINSSKKS bc this is 100% what I’d personally expect him to do too although he was a lot more disciplined in the beginning with that sort of shit but you know he was baked out of his gourd on the regular stillskskss

He’s explained the idea enough times already, but it never sticks, it doesn’t connect in you, the way it does for him. It’s in one ear, out the other. He’s always been for it, science, statistics, experiments and the answers beneath…

Just copy/pasting this entire ass paragraph who among us thinks this’ll be the last I do that in this post? No one? Good you know me well sksks but I feel like this is so fucking accurate and also something that’s so easy to forget in light of how he turns out by the end of the show. Like he’s kind of a fucking botanical whiz?? Even Neto was like, “tf? This kid’s a genius?” in the pilot ep. Like bc he succumbs to addiction, it’s easy to forget what an actual big deal it was, creating a new fucking cash crop essentially, so I love the focus on that from the get, es como que… a veces, él está siendo estupido pero no es estupido, si me sientes

His free hand goes into his jean pocket, retrieving the tin that’s never far from his person. It’s made of a rusty, scratched copper, held together with a loose elastic band.

Okay but whyyyyyttttttt does the idea of Rafa carrying a little fucking tin of bud around at all times the most correct thing in my actual life

You hum, acknowledging without really listening, and flip open his tin.

KSSKSKSKKS NO CRYYYYING BC TBIS IS EXACTLY HOW I WOULD RESPOND just like “este wey🙄can I just try the shits instead of you reciting a whole Wikipedia (encyclopedia?) page about the thing”

Rafa laughs, pinching the sound short by biting into his lip. Then he shrugs. ‘What? I had to. I still brought you some, didn’t I?’

KAKSKSKS I HAD TO, OH REALLYRAFA, WAS IT A MORAL IMPERATIVE THAT YKU GET BAKED OUT OF YOUR GOURD ON YOUR OWN NEW SUPERSTRAIN OF WEEDJSKSKSJ ESO ES LO QUE TE DIJERON LOS DIOSES DE MOTA??

A purpose, he must think, direction at last. ‘My job,’ he says proudly, ‘is to make sure the product is good.’

suuuuuuure yes, sure go ahead and lob this brick at my fucking chest with “a purpose … a direction at last” bc I swear this man does not do well with idle hands, like part of the reason for his breakdown is the fact that he’s literally given nothing else to fucking do. And this is where I’m like, sure Miguel is smart for putting the whole thing together but being top dog means you gotta be at least a leeeeeeeeeetle bit of a ppl person. Like if he’d made Rafa feel like he had some kind of purpose way earlier when he started makin moves with the Colombians, shit prolllllyyy wouldn’t have gone quite as sideways but also tf do I know about running a cartel actually

You smile, infected by him, by the excitement glowing off of him.

STRRRRRTTTIOOOOPPP NO BC a) I KNOW THE EXACT FUCKING SMILE… it’s this smile

and b) I feel like this is a quality universally acknowledged in almost every rafa fic I’ve ever read that his smile is literally like the most blinding shot of earnestness and joy, you literally cannot say no to whatever pendejadas he’s proposing. even María on her worst day couldn’t resist it sksksksks

Scared to admit the dream aloud. ‘Si, es solo el comienzo, sabes?’

NO OKAYSSKSSKSN I AM BANGING A GAVEL AND CALLONG EVERYONE ALL 2 OF US BC IMJUSTSOSORRY I have given this so much thought, like the essence, the thesis for Rafa is that this mf is at his core, a d r e a m e r like embedded in his identity. So like having something to aspire to, beyond the like cock solid ngl this was supposed to say rock solid but i had to let the greatest typo of all time ride sksks freebase hit of power that Miguel’s constantly simping after, is a fucking necessity for this man. He doesn’t know who he is if he doesn’t have some kind of dream so I love that you included that here

You put the joint between your lips and hold out a hand. ‘Pues,’ you prompt, ‘give me a light. Let me see the future.’

OHSSHUUUUUUTTHEFUCKINGFRONTDOOR WITH THIS SLICK ASF DIALOGUE, OH IM MAD, IM MAD MAD MAD, IM SHOOTING SPITBALLS AT YOU FROM A STRAW RN, BC THAT LINE IS SOOOSKSKSJWJWB SM LRKENE GOTDAMN INSPIRED AND I HATE YOU FOR IT (cariñoso por supuesto)

Says something else about soil, earth, plants and lying scientists, fucking lying scientists. You blink against the dark, push the heel of your free palm into your eye sockets.

Sksssscreeching at “fuckint lying scientists” bc ppl legit don’t understand that the scientific method is a way of testing hypotheses that we DONT KNOW ARE CORRECT YET LIKE FFS YOURE TRTING TO SEE IF IT’S RIGHT OR WRONG so the minute a scientist gives any kind of answer tangentially resembling “I don’t know,” people start flipping tables over and screaminfksksks and Rafa is one of those ppl despite his raw intelligence. BUT THEN SKSKSKSKS THE WHOLE HEEL OF YOUR PALM INTO YOUR EYE SOCKETSSSJSJS I’m both marveling at the simple yet so-vivid description of this action bc i can see it SOO clearly and also choking bc anyone who’s ever dealt with a Big Sad Rafa, you know for a fucking fact they’ve done this exact thing at least once literally fuckinsksksks Miguel, as much as I hate him and much of this is largely of his own making, he has rightfully done this exact thing like 20 times in the show like if I had the time, I’d straight make a gif of the exact scene I’m thinking of sksk

He isn’t there to look at, but you pretend that he is. Imagine him sitting at the end of your bed, head in his hands, tears streaking down his cheeks. If he was, you’d reach a hand out. Run it along the ridge of his spine and watch him decompress. It’s easier to know what to say to him when you have him there, like that. Even just in your head.

Alright sksksksjjs here tf we go with the first full-ass paragraph but I literally????? do not even know what to do?? or who I am??? or where to begin?? bc likeGODDDDD okay, the sentiment of this entire paragraph is just so??? it just smacks of like Reader trying to protect themselves from their own mind by like leaning into this hypothetical scenario wherein Rafa is not full fuckint mess that they know he damn well is but THEN as if that wasn’t enough, you had to throw in this interesting dynamic where like they have to relate to Real Rafa by retreating into this part of their brain that they keep Ideal Rafa like all the best parts of him concentrated in one spot so they don’t forget the more he loses himself AND UFH SISKSKSKD ITS JUET SO FUCKING SENSIBLE AND SAD AND IM SHAKING MY FIST INTO THE SKY FULLY GET-OFF-MY-LAWN-YOU-VARMINTS, BOOMER GRANDPA

You hear a thunk in you ear like he’s struck the handset against the nearest wall. He has, no doubt, but it holds. The call stays connected and buzzing in your palm.

Soryajsjsjsjsj bc all im thinking about is that one part where he chucks that gold phone from the second floor and it shatters into a million pieces and liksksksksks I bet they had to have like some kind of warehouse of spare phones, aksksks maybe it’s at the Arellano warehouse or like some contingency built in the budget for spare phones bc Rafa’s decimated so many of themsksksks i imagine it’s a contingency budget similar to like movie sets have for props like sunglasses n shit

The Rafa on the end of your bed is pacing now, stood up and tracing lines into your floorboards. Moving helps him think, it always has, the motion forces the idea to catch and roar into life, like starting an engine.

OHHHHHHH I WWSSKSKSKS AWEAR TO FUCKING CHRIST HERSELFFDDFDDDD I COULD ACTUALLY STRANGLE YOU WITH LOVE I FULLY FUCKINT DONT EVNA GOD.

I literally had to get up and walk around for a second so I could fucking regain my composure and figure out how tf to say how this made me feel. Like the mental image of him tracing lines in the floorboard, mulling it over but that it’s like a fuckimxksjsjwjwjwnw visual exercise for Reader to figure out what to say, how to help him. Like there’s a deep thread of longing in that but it’s really fucking singular in nature to their dynamic specifically bc there’s an element of codependence mixed with self awareness almost??? Like the fact that they kinda need him to be okay for them to be okay and they’re usually this memory palace visualization sksjsjsjssidoaospwondsjsjnwjq to make him oka— Look. Listen. What I’m saying is just ….. ogres are like onions, okay. LAYERS BABY, LAYERRRRRRSSSSSS

You can hear it connect, weirdly, in the silence that follows. Hear the gears click, the brain turn.

NO STOPPS SKSKS I AM CHOKING BC IM JUST PICTURING HIS EXPRESSION AS FULL :WOAHDEEBY: BUT RAFAFIED and by godddkskdkkss it’s making me laugh so fucking hard to the point of hyperventilation, like that laugh with no sound. No sjsjsjs the more I’m thinking about it the more I cannot stooooospkdk fucking laughing

He takes a breath that stills his lungs properly this time, rather than stuffing them with desperate, needed air, then says your name like you’re a genius. Like you’re him.

LIKE YOURE HIM 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 OH WHY MUST YOY ATTACK ME WITH SOMETHINT SO BEAUTIFUL AND TOUCHING I already need a lung transplant from the laughing at this point, why must we continue to deal this damage to my person

‘Don’t kill yourself, tonto.’ Don’t blow yourself to pieces for the sake of water, for the sake of Miguel and his precious sinsemilla.

HOOOOO HOO HOO GUURRRRRRR the not-so-undercover shade👀👀 and resentment👀👀 towards Miguel that is packed into this Mf has got me so 👀 bc what does Reader know. How does Reader have his number so soon am I latching onto this thing that prob means nothing and reading too much into it…. don’t answer that…… probably

He laughs down the line. ‘I’m dead either way, friend. Better I go with a bang.’

GODDDD WHEN I THINK ABOUT WAHT THIS IS IN SOANISHSSISKEK ITS SO FUCKINT DEAD ON RAFA

Me chingue sea como sea, carnal. Pues mejor salir con una 💥 bang.

Imjustsosoryyyysjsjsjsjd it could come right from a script for one of the episodes

You walk through his home like a guest, not a friend. You merge with the walls the way the staff does.

OH SWEET MOTHER OF ALL THAT IS HOLY THIS FUCKINTGGGGGGG KNOCKED ME ON MY ASS TF

He could find a job for you, he says. You could sit by his pool and earn money like it grows, right there, in the flowerbeds. You could live like he does, if you wanted.No, Rafi, I like what’s mine. I like the quiet.

OH NO, GOOD, SO THENS THENNNNNNNNNNNNNN YOU JUST HAAAAAAAD TO GO AND ASSAULT ME WITH “I like what’s mine. I like the quiet” BC THIS IS THE STICKING POINT RIGHT TF HERE, THIS IS THE REASON THE WHOLE THING IS FUCKING DOOMED and tbh, it’s extra fucked with double-anchovies on top bc the fact of the matter is, the quiet would actually be better for Rafa but what he wants and what’s good for him literallyyyyyyy never fucking overlap. But like this was all I could think about when I was writing him, was like …. man, maybe it’s better to leave some things as just dreams ksksksns at least for our pobre Rafitito

You touch the fabric just to feel it. You’d never owned anything this smooth, this well made.

there’s always the most mundane of moments in every readerfic that make me go “oh maaaaan, me too, homie” sksks this is that moment

There’s white under his nostrils, you haven’t missed that, but you haven’t commented on it, either. At least he smells of smoke as well. At least he’s balancing it out.

NOOOOOOSKSKSKSKSKS NO YOU DID NOT JUST DO THE RATIONALIZATION OF HARDCORE DRUGS WITH AT LEAST MANS IS BALANCING HIS UPPERS AND DOWNERS I AN FUCKING SIDJRJRJDJDJD I AM CHOKING, SEIZING, CANNOT BREATHE, HAVING AN ANEURYSM SKSKSK

He hasn’t even noticed your reaction yet. ‘She didn’t take me seriously,’ he says, ‘last time. She made fun of my clothes.’

The way my heart just grew to thrice his size just remembering our pobrecito trying to dance with Sofia literally shouting over the music, “no soy un pinshe mesero” SKSKSK and then pouting on his way back to the table when she still wouldn’t give him the time of day which let’s be real, Sofia was fully trolling all of us including her fucking self bc mija, imjustsosorry that Rafa was wearing the fucking a dopest shirt I’ve ever seen in that scene, like that one is bar none my favorite of all of his shirts on the show i truly believe Ramon was inspired by Rafa to up his shirt game, no one will fucking convince me otherwise

You let him continue. Your brain is still trying to scramble to the point where any of this makes sense.‘Her father is el Secretario de Educacion.’ He sighs. His hands go to his hips. ‘I want to impress her.’A new project, you realise, that’s what he’s found. Something he can’t have, something impossible. Something to solve.

SKSKSKSKSKKDLFJKSLDKJFA TRYING TO SCRAMBLE TO THE POINT WHERE ANY OF THIS MAKES SENSE IDK WHY SKKSS BUT I AM CRYING SO HARD RNsksksksks bc like for some reason this line specifically made me think of liek Reader’s brain is a Magic 8 Ball and they’re shaking it to get some kind of answer within the realm of clarity only their Magic 8 Brain keeps coming up with those annoying, cryptic, noncommittal answers like “reply hazy, try again” or “concentrate and ask again” akskskskks and the mental image in the context of like what we as viewers know what’s going to happen which is a faked kidnapping attempt of this well-known politician’s daughter and like the logic of that entire fucking shitshow is actually fully sending me in a way I have never been sent before. BUT THENENNNNN SKSKS as if being sent further than I’ve been sent before isn’t enough, I literally skdfsjdkf am so goddamn WOAHDEEBY to the fucking max at “A new project … that’s what he’s found. Something he can’t have, something impossible” bc I have never, ever, ever considered in those exact terms but that does completely fit with my whole hc of Rafa as an interminable dreamer till his last days bc there’s an element of dreams that are unattainable and like he becomes restless when he doesn’t have something too look forward to or reach or whatever and aasbaopsdfhaoisdjhf;a now i’m just fucking babbling like I’ve taken too much of my ADHD medication joke’s on you, I haven’t….this is just what straight ADHD is but like goddddd the thought put into his psyche, I’m just tipping my hat off, that’s what the fuck I’m trying to say

He’s always worn what he liked, always put himself to the world exactly as he is, no apology, no polish. Just him, wild as he came.

NOOOOSDKFJALKSJDF;LAKJSD FK;SHFASJD F;ALKSJ WHY TF AM I ACTUALLLY SALIVATING AT “NO APOLOGY, NO POLISH. JUST HIM, WILD AS HE CAME.” LIKE HWY IS THAT ACCIDENTALLY THE HOTTETST DESCRIPTION OF THIS CHAOTIC MF THAT I’VE EVER, EVER, EVER READ IN ALL OF MY TWENTY EIGHT YEARS ON THIS FUCKING PLANET

‘Is she worth all this?’ You point at them lazily. ‘How much did this cost you, tonto?’ ‘You sound jealous,’ he says, smiling, trying to pass it off as a joke.

in every fucking friends to lovers situation, there comes that moment where my face goes to SpongeBob “you like krabby patties,” and you guys, we are here skskdfjskdjfks we’ve arrived only BOTH RAFA AND I ARE “YOU LIKE KRAAAABBY PATTIIIIEEEESSSS”

And you’re jealous of Sofia, too. You wish you weren’t but you are. It creeps up to you, the longer you stand here, it crawls up your trouser legs, into your ears along with her name. She caught his eyes, his heart. You got the brain and everything else, but she has a part of him that he never shared with you. Never tried to.

NO. NO. EVERYONE I AM– I LITERALLY– I CANNOT– I AM INCOHERENT FUCKING INCOHERENT, DO YOU UNDERSTAND??? MY CIRCUITS ARE FUCKINIIIIIIIINGNNSDKFJSLDJF SCRAMBLED BY THE DEEP LONGING, SORROW, RESENTMENT, HOW VISCERAL THIS IS, THE IMAGERY, I’M KISSING YOU ON BOTH CHEEKS LIKE I’M ITALIAN, I’M PUNCHING YOU IN THE THROAT, I’M THROWING THINGS, I’M THAT MEME OF ALL THOSE GAJILLION SPONGEBOBS RUNNING AROUND WITH ALL THE FILE CABINETS ON FIRE, I’M IN A BALL, IN THE FETAL POSITION, ON THE FLOOR, UGLY CRYING AND ASKING SOMEONE TO HELP ME SKSKKSKSK bc even though it’s not explicitly stated, the way this sooooooojust smacks of like….. like he’s always sort of been there, available sometimes too emotionally available sksksk bc it’s Rafa sksks mans is a mess. Mans probably needs a wife and a mom and a teacher and a housekeeper and a camp counselor all in one for a partner to feel emotionally secure in anyway sksk Reader is like 4/5 at this point and bc he’s always been there, no action is taken to ever change the dynamic of the relationship despite the clear allusions to Reader’s desire to maybe do so and allusions to Reader’s very wise and responsible choice of self-preservation over a passionate love affair with a coke-addled botanic genius man-baby who reports to an even larger man-baby only that one is uptight and duplicitous asf but now that the opportunity to change the dynamic is taken away, Reader is left just like, “fuck. missed my chance and like that’s probably more a good than a bad thing but fuck if I’m not still gonna feel butthurt about it”

That’s how he is. Passionate. He fixates, he works, he wins. Loves with a tunnel vision that you’ll never understand.

GODDDDDDLKSJDKF THE WAY YOU HAVE JUST THOUGHT THIS MF THROUGH, NAILED HIM DOWN TO A T, AND IT FUCKING SHOWS IN MOMENTS LIKE THIS. Also loving the tone of like……. Admiration? Of his steadfastness in all things? And simultaneous like lamenting that quality at the same time bc like sksksaklsdkfal we all know the shitshow that arises from Rafa just running shit into the ground with the force of a comet that only passes the Earth every 200 years or whateverlskdsk

‘She won’t care, Rafa. Eres guapo. Te ves rico.’ And that’s what they like, girls like her. That’s what matters. ‘You be good to her, okay? Treat her right. She’s not someone you should mess around.’

I can’t determine if the warning here is like, “Rafa don’t be a psycho, druggie piece of shit to this poor girl who has no idea what she’s getting herself into plot twist: she does and she’s worse than he is ksksksksk or if it’s liiiiiike, “please don’t do anything to bring the wrath of the government upon yourself by treating this politician’s daughter badly” sksksk or both??? Like if it’s the first one, idk why that warms me to Reader like makes me think “what a homie” bc I stan tf out of a character that can set their jealousy aside long enough to humanize the person who’s the object of their envy and also like fuck it, all men are garbage. All non-cis-men unite, gotta have each other’s backs sksksk and like if it’s the second one, I’m screamingskskdjksjfdks bc Rafa’s gonna do everything that is the antithesis of careful and is absolutely going to incur the wrath of the PRI, that’s literally the entire plot of the second half of S1 skskksksskks

How little it became about himself, or what he wanted. How close he’d stumbled to the edge without you waiting a step behind.

UGHHSHDHFLSJHDFLSKJDFKLAJ;SLKDJFA;LKJSDF;LAKJSD;FKLJ A;SLDKJF;ALSJD F;LAJSD F;LAJ WITHOUT YOU WAITING A STEP BEHIND, I’M FUCKING SKDFJSLKDJFLSK SICK TO MY STOMACH, SICK AND CRYING AND ROCKING BACK AND FORTH, SENDING OUT SOS SMOKE SIGNALS BC I DO NEED MENTAL HELP AS MUCH AS DEAR RAFA

You didn’t ask, he didn’t tell, so you lived through the whispers of him. Maybe it’s time, you thought, maybe he’s outgrown you at last. Maybe this is the part where you don’t play catch up.

Dopedopedopedopedopedopedopedopedopedopedope sosososososos just so fucking dope that you just continuously feel the need to pummel me in the fucking face, line by line, you were literally typing this being like, “how do I personally commit terrorisms across the Atlantic to my df, dear friend, Kay. Ohhhhhsdkfjsldkfjslkdj we’ll do this, just fucking torpedo of sadness after torpedo of sadness in the most poetic and touching way I can think of muhahahahhahahahah” don’t even try to deny it I already checked my secret cameras, and I have the receipts, transcripts, all on tape of you talking out loud, planning this brutal personal attack on me and like if I wasn’t presently undead, I’d be giving you a round of applause bc your plan worked perfectly

Snipped ties worse than you had, ones with actual weight. Purpose. Structure that couldn’t afford to be pulled from under him.

slides glasses down bridge of nose and smiles diabolically oh??????? Gorl????? Dramatic irony? is that you I see hiding behind that bush?????? waiting to ambush me as I mind my own fucking business as if I’ve ever minded my own business on my morning walk???? as if I’ve ever taken a morning walksksk it’s fine well, too bad bitch, cause I spotted your sneaky ass before you got the chance to ruin me lies, I’m still ruined bc the fact that Reader understands to some degree their importance to Rafa but at the same time discredit the structure they, themself(?) themselves(?) have been providing throughout their entire friendship but ranks that structure as having lesser value when it’s almost like … if they’d stuck around or been involved in the business directly, so they were more tied to him on a day-to-day basis, would their influence have maybe changed the outcome bc they did provide structure? Who can say. Im sure this makes absolutely negative amounts of sense but I just thought it was intriiiiiiguing

So now he was off the coke, too. Cold turkey and rotting from it.

GOOOOODDDDDDDD THE JUST FULLY JUGGERNAUT ME BETWEEN THE EYES AND KNOCK ME ON MY ASS WHY DONT YOU. LIKE I READ THIS SHIT AND IMMEDIATELY WANTED TO START WRITING MYSELF, SO INSPIRED SDSFSLKDFJLS SHIT SLAPT!!!!! and likiiiiiike we don’t need to get into it, I will just say from my hoodrat days, that is a ROUGH fucking comedownskksksksk

They’ve shut him in like a beast, oiled mahogany set firmly between them and him, him and you.

ASDLKJFA;LSDJF AOKAAYY AGAIN FUCKING JUST SLAMMING ME LEFT AND RIGHT, I’M LIKE NOT EVEN A WHOLE PERSON ANYMORE AT THIS POINT??????A?SD?FA?SD?FA “they’ve shut him in like a beast” like the whole lore of the Wolf Man could be altogether one giant allegory for detox because like low-key that’s what it looks and feels like. It is messy, it is violent, it is agonizing to endure and/or watch and something about the way you’ve put that with the imagery of what the room looks like, just gave me such fucking Wolf Man vibes, gave me actual fucking goosebumps te lo juro

It’s a den, a cage. Distress that’s been played out and abandoned afterwards.

AND WOLFMAN VIIIIIBES PERSIST ALONG WITH THE CONTINUED, CEASELESS, PERSISTENT DAMAGE THAT KEEP DEALING TO ME LIKE THE MOST VINDICTIVE DUNGEON MASTER LIKE DAMN, I’M AT NEGATIVE HIT POINTS, CAN’T KEEP FUCKING DOIN THIS SHIT DO YOU UNDERSTAANLDFJALKSDJFA;LKJSDF;ALK

…more of a wet room than the stylised bathroom it was designed to be. Like walking into the overused swamp of a public swimming pool.

Oh MAAAANANNNN this is such a fucking doozy of a description, like it’s so tangible, I’m fucking there, I’m there and my hair is frizzy and I’m annoyed and i’m also applauding the skill skskksksk

‘It’s me,’ you say, louder now. His head lifts weakly. ‘Sofia?’ No, not her, only you.

OH GOOD GOTDAAAAMNNNNFNSKLDFJS DUDE NO EVERYONE, EVERYONE SIT TF DOWN AND SHUT TF UP BC THIS IS LIKE????????? I DON’T???????? EVEN KNOW HOW ALSDKFJALSKDJF;ALJ OHOW TO ADEQUATELY EXPRESS THE WAY THIS MADE ME FEELL?????????????????????? Like …. There’s something like a declaration, the way Reader says, “no, not her, only you.” Like I depending on how you read it, it could be like sadness, lamentation, feelings of inadequacy which would totally make sense to me, but for some reason, the way I read it was like, “no, not her, only you” as in “yeah, me. The one who’s been here for you every time you’ve needed it, while the rest of the world was spinning, iwas the only one still and waiting, and now you’re here and so am i” and idk if that’s even the most accurate interpretation of that but GOOOODDAAAAAMMMMMMMMNNNNN WHEN I SAY I CLUTCHED MY CHEST AND KEELED OVER LIKE SOMEONE IN ONE OF THOSE LIFE ALERT COMMERCIALS

You don’t know enough about withdrawals to know if it’s normal. If he’s supposed to look like this, if it’s part of the process. You don’t know if it’s even the drugs at all, but you know him, and you know this is bad for him. Lights off in the fucking dark.

Okay first off, “lights off in the fucking dark,” :lebrontear: bc jfc the way I felt this straight to the core of my soul and secondly…… with how much cocaine Rafa was doing especially the coke in the 80s which was usually more pure, cut with less nonsense, so a lot stronger this is….p normal skdkskksksk

What if this is him now? What if this is what happened while you were away, and it’s set too deep to be undone?

What if this is me now … a disassmbled pile of bones, like I was one of those lego people and someone just pulled me apart and left me in tiny pieces on the floor just waiting for some unsuspecting adult to step on me, causing shooting pain into their foot like they’ve just stepped on actual shards of glass bc you apparently decided you just had to fucking disassemble? Idk what I did to make you hurt me so but I’m literally worse off than Rafa at this point so great, hope you’re happy

‘I miss you,’ he says, in the same way. Desperate, quick, like he’s only got a few words left to give. ‘You know that, right? I miss you, too.’

LITEREALLLLYYYYFSLDKFJA;LSDKJF;ALKSDJF;LAKJSDF;LAKJSD;FLKJA;SLDIJF ATHIS HAS TO FUCKING STOP, THIS IS BECOMING A FUCKING WAR CRIME AT THIS POINT, A VIOLATION OF THE UNITED NATIONS’ STANDARDS OF VIRTUAL ENGAGEMENT WITH FOREIGN COUNTRIES that sounds even less real than I thought it wouldsks

Pounding on your door and peppering the button until the bell can’t complete a full ring anymore. It just spits out one shrill note, over and over.

Okyaskfjalskdjfa;lskjd;flajsd; okayokayokay bc here’s that time where I whip out my detective notepad and tiny glasses and begin feverishly jotting down notes skskskks bc I’m internally I guess it’s not so internal given this is going on the inter webs for my -3 followers to see FUCKING SHRIEKING AT THE LITERARY GENIUS THAT I MUST SOMEHOW FIND A WAY TO ABSORB THROUGH OSMOSIS AND HARNESS FOR MYSELF TO LEVEL UP MY OWN SHIT SKSKSKSKSKKSKS and I’m gonna call this specific Skill You Have, “Naming and/or Describing Stuff That I’ve Seen/Heard A Million Times irl In the Most Unique and Poetic Way Possible” like the doorbell, if you asked me to sit down and fucking describe what that sounds like, I would literally just be

BUT HTENSKDFJSKDFJ THEN READ THIS, it’s one of those moments where I’m like “oh that’s so spot-on, how could I not summon those words, that’s so fucking clever”

Rushed to your door with an urgency you can’t grasp onto yet; it slips through your fingers, like him, like what you had. Scatters in the hallway like dropped ball-bearings. You can’t catch him like you used to.

throws chair violently like that one Jon Bernthal Punisher gif that’s it. I’m fucking done. I’m done????? Do you understand???? I’m done. I will not continue to SIT IDLY BY WHILE YOU CONTINUE TO ABUSE ME THIS WAY, ESTA NO ES LA FORMA DE TRATARA UNA CAMARADA, OKEYYYYYYYYY???

‘Have you actually stopped to think? I have a job, Rafa, a life. I’m not involved in your,’ your search for the word, the title of all his erratic decisions: adventures, war, ‘bullshit.’ Yeah, that fits.

Skskskkskskskks i have no idea why, maybe bc Reader has fucking HAD it and it’s so sarcastic and fucking over-this-shit, but I did start reading the end of this in Spanishsksksksk “Aventuras, guerra, ‘pendejadas.’ Aye, se queda bien”

‘Have you planned any part of this, or did you do too much coke and come here on a whim?’ you ask evenly. You’re not judging him, but you have to know. Fear or drugs. It’s one of the two. You stare at him afterwards, waiting for an answer.

FEAR OR DRUGSSDKFSLDKJFLSKJDF WHY DID THAT MAKE ME m CACKLE SO HARRDDD IT’S LIKE NOT THAT FUNNY BUT IT IS BC LIKE MY FIRST THOUGHT WAS “por que no los dos??”

‘Well, yeah. It’s all paid for, carnale.’ You scoff. ‘You only have to get on the plane.’

NASODFA;SDLKFJA;SKJDF NO I AMMMASDFKAL HAVING A FUCKING ANEURYSM LAUGHING SO HARD SKDFJSLDKFJ AT ATHIS ;DFJGUCKING SHIT. LIKE RAFA. RAFAAAAAA. AMORCITO, CHIQUITO. THE COST OF THE PLANE TICKETS AND THE OBSCENELY EXTRAVAGANT RESORT YOU’RE STAYING AT IS SO FAR FROM TEH FUCKING POINT I’M SHOCKED THAT YOU EVEN MADE IT TO THE HOUSE WITH A SHIRT ON BC CLEARLY YOUR MENTAL FACULTIES ARE SO BACK ASSWARDS BUT ALSO LIKE SKSJDKSJKSKA THIS IS COREECT LIKE HE WAS THIS ABSURD

‘She wants to come with me,’ he answers. ‘And I want you to come too, once it’s safe.’

Rafa trying to make his throuple dreams come true, only I’m pretty sure once Reader and Sofia arrive on the island, only one of them is leaving the island bc homicide has occurred bc they are so beyond opposites, they couldn’t last more than a week without one murdering the other sksksk

But what are you even agreeing to? What does he need you for, when he’d have Sofia with him already? Why would you go if he was going to— ‘You aren’t coming back, are you?’

CUE ME SKDJFLSJK WOAHDEEBY RIGHT ALONG WITH READER, LIKE OFC SKSKSKKS HE’S TRYING TO PACK ALL HIS FAVORITE TOYS IN HIS SUITCASE CAUSE HE RAELLY IS NEVER COMING BACK

One final time, you could show out for him just one final time, and then put it to bed. No more friendship, no more relying on you to pile up the bricks again. If he can’t come home afterwards, then you will, alone, and he’ll be free to take on the world. All by himself. Just as he wanted to.

Sorry sddlfja;sdkjf;a bc no, I just have to make this shit about me always, at all times, everywhere, this. shit. This reminds me so much of the Rafa/María thingy I did, like clean slate, getting to take on the world, except it’s fucked bc he’s not sober. Like yeah, my Rafa was cracked in the head bc he’d been cracked in the head a great many times sdkksjdfklsdj but your Rafa, this Rafa, is spun tf out on coke, desperate, and running for his life sldkfjsklj like the hope at the end of my story isn’t here, and it’s making my stomach AND MY CHEST HURT BC I KNOW THIS IS ALL GOING TO END IN A BALL OF FLAMES

A laugh you don’t like twitches out of him; he isn’t taking it seriously. He doesn’t realise how easy it is to fall yet, how close he is to the sun.

FUUUUCKKSJFDSLFKJSL describing his laugh as TWITCHING OUT OF HIM is like so on-point for a tweaker like Rafa, I can see it and it’s making me cringe and I’m also scribbling in my detective’s notepad and crying to myself, and swearing bc the tears keep smearing the ink and I keep having to scratch out the diligent notes I’m trying to take on the art of writing that you’re teaching me

He’s never been nobody anywhere. Even before all this shit.

SKDFJAL;SDKJF;ASDKJF;A NO BC JUST THE MOST POETIC FUCKING WAY TO SAY “HE’S A HAM AND A HALF”

‘And then I’ll come home,’ you add. He’s already talking like he’s forgotten, like he thinks you’ll follow him across the globe, one step behind as always.

GODDD he’s like willfully not hearing Reader bc he can’t conceive of the notion of like them not being there, or him getting caught, or both, is like the most heartbreaking thing and the way Reader has to gently remind him, “and then I’ll come home,” LIKE HES A LITTLE FUCKSINGSKDJFSKSJ KID

It would’ve made things worse for her, tagged her into the downfall alongside him, so it’s good that she avoided it. She stands a better chance of a future having done it.

Once again, the fact that Reader is like not blaming Sofia and like sees where she’s coming from is so fucking well-adjusted but also complicated and layered and I’m just really living for that dynamic even though I sincerelyfuckingdoubt Sofia would be so understanding if the tables were turned aksjfsk but that’s just bc she’s an literal actual child. Like 20 years old is still young-dumb-stupid, lbr

It was all anger. Hurt. Liquid regret pouring through the handset.

LIQUID REGRET POURING THROUGH THE HANDSETS;JAF;LSDJIF;ALSDJF;OFIJQWE;OFIJAOSDIJFA;SDKJFNA;OSDIJF;AOSIJDF; I HATE YOU, I HATE, HATE, HATE YOU. SO SKILLFUL, FLOWS BEAUTIFULLY. AND IT FUCKING R H Y M ES ????? BC YOU WEREN’T FLEXING ENOUGH ALREADY???? I’M PACING OKAY, I CAN’T BREATHE

It wasn’t the plan to come in like this was any other, normal reunion, like you’re seeing him after an impromptu vacation. The plan, was to be a friend to yourself, for once.

GODDDD;AKJ THE LITERAL FUCKING DREAD YOU HAVE BUILT INTO THIS BUT ALSO AT THE SAME TIME GOT ME FULL FUCKING CLIMBING TO THE TOP OF A STREET LAMP, LIKE AN OVERLY ENTHUSIASTIC SPORTS FAN, RIOTING AND TEARING DOWN MY OWN CITY, SWINGING MY FUCKING T-SHIRT AROUND, CHEERING READER ON BC “THE PLAN WAS TO BE A FRIEND TO YOURSELF FOR ONCE” IS LIKE THE FUCKIGNSODFIJSDLDFKJ MOVE LIKE GORL RUN FOR YOUR LIFE AND NEVER LOOK BACK IN NO WAY AM I SEEING PARALLELS BETWEEN THIS AND MY RECENT DIVORCE AND SOBBING ON MY KEYBOARD, AND SHORT-CIRCUITING MY LAPTOP AS I READ THIS, NOOOOOPOPEEEEEE NOOOOOOT DOING IT

‘I’ve been going fucking crazy in here,’ he says, ‘not even Neto wants to talk to me.’ ‘Neto’s here too?’ You’ve met him before, of course. He isn’t a character you can forget easily.

SKLFSKSKSK now I know why you chose that gif. From “no salta el DIIIIISCO WEY!” to “es basura, he hates me” in 60 seconds. This also reminds me of that one scene in S2 when Miguel goes to visit Neta to ask for advice y’know as tho he didn’t complete blast Neto in the ass with a sandpaper dildo aka entirely responsible for him being there in the first place and Neta, in no uncertain terms tells him to get fucked but then also says something about how, if Miguel ever ends up in there, he’d let “estas pinshes marranas puercas como Rafa” cut him to pieces or something sdkjfsk

Honestly, you’d hoped you would at least have some glass between, you were counting on it, even. Something for his reaction to bounce off.

SWEEEEEET FUCKS THIS DIDN’T EVEN OCCUR TO ME IN THE SLIGHTEST BUT OFC YOU’D BE EXPECTING GLASS. IT’S IN ALL THE MOVIES, THE GLASS AND THE PHONE BUT NOW HE’S SO MUCH CLOSER, LIKE HAVING TO EXTRACT THEMSELF FROM HIM LIKE P H Y S I CALLY, EMOTIONALLY, MENTALLY ASLDFJA;SLJFA;LSDJF;ALSJK FI ASTQA=WE0RUQ=EI I’M DONE. I’M FUCKING DONE. I CAN’T MAKE IT TO THE END

He’s been souring since he’d swapped you for Miguel, himself for the business. Been gone before you’d even realised. You’ve spent all this time trying to stitch him back together, keep the body whole, keep the motor running, and he was already a ghost. Gone through the fucking cracks. You were just too sentimental to see it, too loyal to the kid you’d met at the end of the street.

I’m like– liek?????? I don’t know what to say????? rn??? I’m like, like…. See I can’t even fucking worsdkfsjldfjslkdfjslkdfj ;sdasdflkajsdl;fkja;sldfkja;lsdfja;io sfhjpiquwoehf like I really can’t. Liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiike I cannot actually asummon the cognitive power to a fasfeormea sslkdfj la;sjf rform a real actualfucking sentence bc like????? I think you broke my brain????? And all cognitive functioning has ceased entirely??? don’t even have the capacity to caps or key smash bc I’m like real-life shell shocked and catatonic, staring off into a void I will never know or understand and I’m pretty sure I will never write a single, solitary thing again bc what is the point when it’s already been said in these few lines

‘For who?’ he asks. ‘I need you in here, I’ll go crazy, I’ll—’ ‘For me, Rafa.’ That’s the point, the whole point, and still he doesn’t get it. ‘It’s better for me, and I have to do it.’ And he has to let you. He said he wouldn’t ask again, wouldn’t expect you to follow him everywhere he went. Just because he’s stuck in one place now, doest mean you have to be too. One of you deserves a win, right? You won’t serve time on his behalf.

HOOOOOOKAAAAY IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSKJEKLJKRLWEJSSIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMM,,,,,,,MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMHMMMMMMMHH you won’t serve time on his behalf. YOU WON’T SERVE TIME ON HIS BEHALF. 👏🏽YOU👏🏽WON’T👏🏽SERVE~~👏🏽GOTDAMN👏🏽TIME👏🏽ON👏🏽HIS👏🏽BEHALF👏🏽

You don’t, and if this is how he wants to be, then fine, conversation over. Cloth cut from the body at last …You’ve found your track, now it’s time to run it, right to the end. Just like he would.

ALRIGHT. COOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLL. … I FEEL SO GOOD NOW ……………. YEAH FUCKING INCREDIBLE, TOP OF THE WORLD …………………… THAT DIDN’T HURT AT ALL ……………………………… SO EXCITED THAT YOU DID ALL THESE TERRORISMS TO ME ……………………………………………… NOT AT ALL FEELING

five and one

rafa x gn!reader, 7598 words, canon typical drug use, hurt/comfort/angst, no happy ending(!!!)

the five times you were his friend, and the one time you weren’t 

a/n: this has been in my docs waiting to be finished for sososo long omg finally the rafito despair is here. enjoy!

taglist: @ashlingiswriting​ @drabbles-mc​ @cositapreciosa​ @hausofmamadas​ @cherixrosa​ @purplesong1028​ @mandaloria314​ @dashavau​ @yeetintomadness @thesandbeneathmytoes​ (as per i have forgotten who wants tagging and who doesnt sorry!)

1

Rafa’s been asking you for weeks. Come smoke, carnale, come on. I have something to show you.

Soon, you told him. I’m busy with school, work, I have to pick my Abuela up from church—I’m the only one who can drive her, remember?

They weren’t made up excuses, even if he thought they might’ve been. You didn’t like it either, having no time for him, but it’s how it went. How it is. He dropped out of school, never made it to college. You did. It gives you different markers now, different structures to shape the friendship around. When you were classmates it was easy, natural: before class, in class, after class. Simple. There you were, there he was. Now, you have to pencil him in like any other obligation.

He isn’t an obligation. You try not to let him feel like one.

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