#and we started watching randomly
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bro what the fuck i just watched the episode where L dies and THAT scene after they come back inside from the rain really is over the top.what the fuck. I did not remember that romantic piano music. Also the double-entendres of everything they say..on the one hand it's alluding to L's soon-to-be murder, but also clearly it's meant to be (or at least could be) understood as romantic. What the actual fuck did I just watch. Also why did they look at each other like that. What the fuck
#this just reminded me of the first time i saw this age 13#with my 11 year old cousin#on youtube. each episode was split into like 7 videos of 2 minutes#to waive any copyright issues i suppose#and we started watching randomly#and when we got to this part. my heart dropped because for a moment i really genuinely thought that they were going to kiss#and at this point i had gotten into fanfiction in private..and had been on tumblr maybe for a month or so#but i was terrified of seeing anything Overtly gay with a member of my family#let alone my 11 year old cousin who maybe hadn't had any exposure to gay existence#and i was like Oh shit they're going to kiss and then my cousin will tell our parents and then#*cue light yagami style internal monologue where i thought about hitting the router with my foot or faking a headache or whatever*#and then they didnt kiss and i was like oh :/#had forgotten about that repressed memory#oh to be a middle schooler again#death note
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#this man and his poster!!!#he wants to believe!!!#dailytxf#txfedit#i think this is the first scene in this show that ive watched with my hands actually over my mouth in anticipation#because i KNEW where we were going and we got such a sweet payoff!!!#they way they made us wait i was DYING#also the colours here are *chef kiss*#this ep started extremely strong with the s1 vibe#went downhill when scully was randomly jealous with no motivation#then picked up for this excellent final scene#hopefully ill make more gifs of this ep...#my gifs#the scientist speaks#x files#the x files#david duchovny#fox mulder#notes: 100#s06e16#alpha
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ohhh my friend came over and we somehow ended up watching the entirety of tpn season one and ray still makes me so fucking sick. im goig to tear apart steel beams with my teeth
#skye's ramblings#THOUGH IM ALSO JUMPING AROUND SOO FAST BC SHE LIKED IT. shes like my only irl friend shes known abt my illness since the start#i take my ray plushie when i sleep over at her house she calls him my little guy. i genuinely didnt think it'd interest her much#we were literally just bored and she randomly picked up v1. 2 pages in she was like 'oh this is really addicting can i borrow this'#FELT AUTUSM KICK INTO MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE. said we could watch the anime n after ep1 she was like oh this is really good#cant describe how much i am jumping off tge walls in my mind. shes never been able to get into anime till now. i think i just won at autism#of course w the excitement comes escape arc ray once again hitting my brain with hammers god i love him so fucking much guys. i'm nauseous#it'll be 3 years since my first watch soon btw i wonder if ray emotions will ever stop making me physically ill. ifuckng love yuou raaay...
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Warframe'd your Getter
This crossover can only be understand by a total of 3 people (me and my 2 friends)
#getter robo#warframe#honestly if you both play warframe and read/watch getter robo we should play together#lol we can form the getter team in warframe#this silly au started when i randomly went to my friend and said “The void and Getter Rays are similar huh”#like if you think about it....god i love robots with cosmic horror 💖💖 fav gender fr
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learning that when i watched the beginning of a movie a while back (and meant to but never finished it) that i stopped right before it suddenly turns into a full-blown musical
#WHAT ...... like as in people randomly start singing kind of musical. it was a showbiz satire in the beginning i saw#ok we gotta immediately start it over and watch the whole thing this time#this is abt the excellently titled film expresso bongo which yes of course is another in a long line of movies i watch for my guy
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i'm so fucking stressed out
#dude my dog had acl repair surgery in march#she's healed fine with that but developed stomach issues#so she's been back and forth to the vet with that#and now when i was at work she just randomly started walking weird as fuck. she kicks her leg that was operated on backwards as she walks#and sometimes looses balance in both legs#and then when i pick her up she acts like it hurts her spine or something#i'm gonna wake up in 4 hours to call the vet and see if they can see us today and pray that this isn't something that she'll need surgery#for again#i also am supposed to work tomorrow and then friday we have a rehearsal dinner and then saturday the wedding which is two hours away.#vets closed on sunday so if she can't get seen tomorrow it'll be a whole new fiasco trying to get her helped somewhere else#this dog is my lifeline like it#ruins me#seeing her like this#genuinely if i didn't have her i wouldnt be here#it's so hard to watch her not even be able to walk#but it's so fuckinf weird bc my mom said she was just laying in her bedroom and she came back out doing it? there's nothing she could've#gotten into it just makes no fuckinf sense#like it's possible either her kneecap or her acl implant thing popped out of place but#she stiffens her entire body when i pick her up#and she acts like she's losing balance#it's so fucking weird#i'm also terrified that i'm about to get told she has some kind of onset of neurological problems and she'll have to get put down#or something along those lines#it's just too much rn#pls keep my doggy in ur thoughts#we just spent 3k on her surgery in march if she has to get operated on again first of all the recovery process all over again sounds like#a nightmare#but just the cost alone#i'm gonna FUCKING KILL MYSELF
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Fun with first drafts.
I have to be a little more careful because I have a dog now and—unlike my cats, who merely un-staple stuff with their teeth and steal my post-it notes—the dog will actually eat the paper drafts. So that’s new.
I am familiar with the “dog ate my homework / car insurance / law degree” lament but I had always assumed that was a myth.
#wilf#(work i’d like to finish)#feeling cautiously optimistic like maybe the worst of my work situation is finally over#(because of all the yelling & screaming & crying and throwing up)#and I got a handful of nice ao3 comments on some of my old pieces and like#also Boyfriend randomly started rewatching one punch man and didn’t tell me?#he’s the kind of person who can fall asleep to tv shows / YouTube vids#I’ve never been that person#anyway#we ran out of shows to watch and now I’m just watching whatever episodes he hasn’t slept to
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missing venti hours
#i am having thoughts . but i am not too confident to make them their own posts#mmmost notably#about how nice of a thought it is — to imagine a bard that ven can get to hold again. to hear again#but . the idea that in canon . the best he could do to replicate that feeling is either holding himself and pressing softly or perhaps#gathering a long pillow in his arms and pretending#because mortals do not last long (not without consequence). and as said so much — time is merciless. it matters not how the clock ticks away#for you. whether it be by seconds or minutes. hours or years. it marches along regardless of anyone’s feelings to it#and you have to grasp at what lingers in between : the bonds that you make . the joy and sorrow . the laughing and silence#and you have to hold them close close close. to preserve them for another day#there is no getting back what was lost#but that’s a bit too bittersweet so anyways#first and foremost ven is a nuisance and we love him for that#secondly and much more importantly than the first point is that ven is full of love and care that it surprises me how it does not burst out#from him. ven puts others before himself A LOT. he wants everyone to be able to live peacefully. happily#to find that they can live another day with a smile#and if that means assuring them of what’s to come. or offering them a shoulder to cry on. or making a fool of himself#then by the heavens himself will he sign up for the task#he is not !!! a lazy archon i refuse this notion#he cares deeply for his people !!! he watches and he will help if they stumble and will back away when they wish to walk forwards on their#own !! and they will make mistakes and they will learn from them and he will be there …!!!!! to see them grow !!!!!#besides mondstadt doesn’t particularly ?? seem like they want a god to truly rule over them . tbh#and this is disregarding the fact that mond . fucking killed their first god . ven is not going to risk that ???#so what use would it be — to start randomly showing up as a god and guiding them that way ?? that would be pressuring !!#does this . am i making sense . im very tired#it’s 2am#lantern says stuff
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Chat what if I started crying
Tw for animal death in the tags
#my senior cat is doing not great#she must’ve been bitten by some large neighborhood animal#she’s pretty sick and has some bite marks from canine teeth on her lower back#she probably won’t make it through the night#I really hope she does so we can get her to the vet#why didn’t we take her when we first found the bite marks#if she doesn’t at least she dies with loved ones#unlike my other cat#who died from being attacked by some different beast#like god two three years ago at this point#idk why this cat is making me feel so much worse#maybe it’s because instead of my mom randomly sitting me down and telling me#I’m watching her decline in real time#we probably won’t get another new cat after this#I hope we do though#I don’t like not having a fuzzy little study buddy#and my other cat at the moment doesn’t really do affection#I have a little bit of hope though because she still has enough energy to be hissy spitty at the dog for simply existing#and when we moved her from one end of a bed to the other she stood up and re situated herself#lowkey wanna start sobbing but idk I feel like that’d make my parents pay attention to me and that’s lowkey what I don’t want#like idk my family does the physical affection like hugging and shit#but when k feel like shit that’s not really my thing#and boy howdy do I feel like shit#anyway rant over#bye
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literally just trying to find out if theres a fucking hurricane coming my way and clicking any news article on my phone is a jumbled mess of ads and beating around the bush like holy shit dude just show me the fucking graphic of the storm path i saw in the thumbnail. im going to lose my mind
#this is the real shit that has me frustrated with technology. like we're so advanced and yet this is the bullshit we deal with#we put a man on the moon but we cant put hurricane coverage not behind a paywall#side note like its so rare for people to just sit down and watch the news now#unless they were already so inclined#if i can get a bajillion ads in front of me for some fucking car or sports drink or whatever#can they start running ads like 'hey dipshit theres a hurricane coming'#admittedly this one isnt rly coming my way as much as beryl did#but is2g the past decade has just been someone randomly happening to mention to me a hurricane is coming and thats how i find out
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it’s wild that they dropped the yuri on ice trailer for the movie years ago and we never heard anything from it ever again 😭
#LIKE WHAT#i just randomly thought abt this#that was the first anime i watched when i started to get into anime#so it holds a soft spot in my heart 🥹#but like are we ever gonna get that movie?? is my question 😭#tris.txt
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anyway we've never watched Sanremo but we keep meaning to and frankly I need a big fun event to join in with so uhh if you don't wanna see us posting about that you should probably block "#sanremo" and "#sanremo 2024"
#personal#thoughts#🍬 post#sanremo#sanremo 2024#I have no idea if we'll be watching the whole thing or just like randomly checking in and watching bits#since we've been sleeping at weird and unpredictable times#but given that it starts at 8:30pm (7:30pm here) and ends whenever the fuck the host decides apparently#and it's a week long event#we should be able to watch a decent amount of it
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Sorry to start complaining but its my tumblr
#my friend cut me off for being mean to a guy she didn't even know#and said she hated how i treated ppl but she literally stalked his account to find his brother and post in our gc that hes hot#and proceeded to ask if he's bisexual#i was mean to him bc he kept standing me up so i said he can hangout now or im done talking to him#she was so mad at me for it too and ended a 6 year friendship ovr it#i cant help but to be upset she left and i started subconsciously blaming her#like she didn't know my dad was gonna die etc. but i was with her 24/7 when her family member died#I WAS WATCHING MY GRANDMA WHO HAD CANCER BTW.#like she didn't care at all abt me and it's so hard to face that while not having my dad#then i made a new friend and we talked for awhile but she cut me off randomly w/out any reason#and ive been crying over it#i just feel like i am an issue and problem#I have a horrible habit of only choosing one person to talk to and then facing the repercussions of it when they leave (isolated)#and i know it's my fault but i wish ppl told me what i did wrong or what i did to make them mad/uncomfortable/sad bc i can fix my behavior#but if they just leave it shows they didn't really want to be my friend and that's ok but#all i have is my husband and it gets so boring my life shouldn't revolve around him yet it does because I'm so inept at talking
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And then they all settled into the break room to watch the latest Season Premiere! Yes, because it just so happened to be that particular pop-up holiday, and I was like, "Well, they have a nice big TV right here." XD They thoroughly enjoyed the shows on offer, though about midway through Smiler and Alice both got distracted by flirting with Victor. XD But they watched enough of them all to complete the tradition, and that's what matters!
And better yet, by the time they'd all completed their required watching, the blizzard had cleared up, and the snow outside was starting to melt as it was in fact now kind of warm! "All right," I thought cheerfully, "let's just get a picture of the trio in front of their new store, and then we can open!"
...yeah, uh, that ended up TAKING SOME DOING. The first issue I ran into was when I tried to set up the tripod myself at the edge of the lot and have Alice set the timer for a picture -- apparently it was too close to the front of the store, meaning that instead of standing OUTSIDE the store as I'd intended, the group went INSIDE and stood behind the flower-arranging bench in front of the windows. Which, might have been okay if I believe Alice hadn't been entirely blocked by the shelves of flowers. XD So I had to put the tripod and camera back in Alice's inventory and have her place them in the world in the middle of the road, hoping the tripod would face the right way when she did. Fortunately, she did put it down facing the store, yay. First hurdle passed!
Second hurdle -- uh-oh, Smiler is feeling the thirst. Well, fortunately, that is easily taken care of -- they always carry a bunch of plasma packs and plasma fruit. They sipped on that while Victor and Alice had a little make-out session, and ended up refreshed enough that I didn't have to worry about shitty needs while taking the picture. Second hurdle passed!
And then we came to the third hurdle -- ACTUALLY GETTING THESE IDIOTS TO TAKE THE PICTURE. Dear lord, this was SUCH a thing. Because either Alice would go to set the timer, and then just IDLE there for long enough that I would think something had gone wrong and cancel the interaction, or while "waiting for the photographer" Smiler would randomly wander off down the road, and if I tried to teleport them back into position by changing poses when Victor and Alice got in front of the camera, they would end up merged INTO Alice, which, not good. FINALLY getting the shots I wanted took so long that not only did I have to have them change clothes halfway through as they were too hot in their winter wear, it was SUNSET by the time I went "FINE I'M TURNING AUTONOMY OFF SO YOU CAN'T MOVE." *facepalm* Granted, I actually think the sunset photos look pretty cool, and I was happy with the photos once I got to take them, but cripes. Make me suffer for my cute threesome shots, why don't you, game?
#sims 4#the lazy save#victor van dort#alice liddell#smiler always#pop-up holiday about season premieres: perfect excuse to just watch TV in the break room XD#at least they had a good time and completed the holiday!#I'm aware they look rather overlit in those pictures though#I think it's because the couch is in front of the glowing bannister for the stairs#may have to adjust the lighting situation in that room#but now it is time to bitch about how long it took me#both in game and out#to get those DAMN PICTURES#like I just wanted a nice photo op of their new store#so we could hang up a couple of pictures both at the store and at home#but nooooo#either the game was lagging or Smiler felt the need to wander off randomly#I don't LIKE having to turn off autonomy in my games but#I'm starting to think it might be a necessity when using the tripod sometimes#Smiler does NOT like waiting for the photographer I've found#especially if there's ANY kind of lag#*sigh* at least the actual pictures themselves turned out good!#very pleased with those shots#queued
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Does anyone else occasionally see a news update from someone and just turn into a feral animal over it? Asking for a friend
#its me im the friend#and by someone i usually mean an ex lol#i decided to check if they are still alive (they are!)#and its the pettiest thing. like the most petty thing ever#i get angry when an ex watches a new show before i do. hence another reason not check on them#this happened years ago with high school of the dead of all things#i ended up not watching high school of the dead until like a year ago because i was angry they beat me to it like 6 years ago#and yeah i finally watched it and it was so very terrible. kinda glad they got that one#back when i still spoke with them regularly (we still talk but its rare now) like 6 years ago#they mentioned that they were going to watch deadman wonderland so i stayed up long hours for like a day or two#and just binged the hell out of deadman wonderland so they would not beat me to it lol#deadman wonderland was also subpar. my ex does not have great taste in anime#but today i found out they watched two shows (one of which i finished a few months ago and one i havent started yet)#and unlike before these are actually good anime not subpar 6-year-old mainstream anime lol#no offense to people who like high school of the dead or deadman wonderland. they just werent for me#i actually found deadman wonderland somewhat fascinating but the anime fell flat. i plan to read the manga one day#i should also clarify that by feral animal i just mean im grumpy. im not going to say or do anything about it#i'll probably either watch the anime out of spite very soon or refuse to watch it for several years. we shall see#also in other news my ex unblocked me? yeah it the ex that blocked me randomly a few months ago and then undid it right after#it was all very strange. like i said we still talk. we havent fought. i never start conversations they always initiate them#except in special circumstances. i did reach out recently for work related reason because i had a problem that aligned with their job#i did not mention anything about the blocking and neither did they lol. i guess we are pretending it didnt happen#so i have had 3? exes block me only to unblock me a few weeks to months later? why is this a trend#why am i still awake at three am you ask? ANGER#thats half a joke. i am already over the anger with my ex beating me to the shows but i am angry for unrelated reasons#reasons that have to do with another person once again breaking our appointment after they promised we would talk today#they were a complete no show. im rather annoyed by it. but alas~ that is life#im tempted to delete this post because its really just venting but i find the wording of the post itself to be kinda funny so it can live#neo rambles#neo complains in the tags
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Uhm... so ... my ex?boyfriend that I still live with until he graduates in October (and hopefully goes on to find a job soon so he can move out) is starting to blackpill himself with questionable relationship and men's issues content on yt
and also refuses to sit down and talk about my problems with the kinda content he watches
This worries me.
#I'm not entirely sure how to think about this#he started binging this swiss yt channel about men and their hardships with modern dating#which at first glance i didnt think twice about because sure why not#let this swiss woman with an amazingly soothing voice shine a light on mens issues#sounds good to me they deserve to have their voices heard too#but then i watched one of her videos about mismatched expectations between men and women#and boy#some good opinions here and there#but just as many red flags#like underexplained graphics#very little nuance in some of her takes#loads of generalizations#to me it kinda sounded like bending the data to fit ur thesis#so i told him all the things that worry me about how she uses statistics#and as someone who works data i expected this guy to be a bit more understanding of my issues with her content#but instead i only got a very brash 'ok fine very observant arent we'#as he put his headphones back on to continue watching another one of her videos#then#five minutes later#after nothing but silrnce he just randomly blurts out 'because women are dumb' in a self assured#almost annoyed tone of voice#i was like wtf#and i guess then he realized that i heard#and i was like 'dude imagine me sitting here hearing not a peep from u for a while until u blurt out because women are dumb??'#like what even are u watching that makes u say that#like i get indulging in content that confirms your views and biases once in a while when ur feeling down#but nothing has ever made me say something this blatently immature and hateful about another group#especially if that other group is the entire opposite sex like my guy are u okay????#i wish we could watch these videos together so we can hear each others opinions on her takes in real time and have a proper conversation#but i don't think he'd wanna do that atm & also there's a reason i don't want to be w/ him anymore and this exact attitude is part of it
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