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Ain't Right part 2
Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader
Summary: It's the holiday season and Joel is a Scrooge.
Warnings: 18+ SMUT MDNI, age gap (56/20), swearing, p in v, unprotected sex, size kink, oral sex (m!receiving), SQUIRT, creampie, threats of violence, alcohol
Celia's note: uhm hello??? what the flip thank y'all sm for all the love on my first post!! I got so many requests to make a part 2 so dinner's ready y'all dig in!!!!
Read the first part! > part 1
Jackson looked so pretty this time of year. The Christmas lights, the snowmen, the comfy sweaters and chocolate chip cookies; you loved it all.
Especially gift-giving.
To you, there was really nothing better than seeing someone's face light up when they open a present.
This year, there was someone special you planned to go all out for.
It had been 3 days since Joel Miller fucked you in his house, on his bed.
You hadn't stopped replaying the moment in your mind, especially the part when he finished all over your stomach.
However, it just so happens that after those amazing thirty minutes, Joel was called away by Tommy.
He had to leave and do something that you weren't allowed to know about. Undoubtedly some dangerous mission that pained you to think about.
So your victory was short-lived.
But, like the gentleman he was, he walked you home and made sure you were okay before he left. You wanted to kiss him goodbye, but felt too nervous to do so.
You don't know why—he literally had his cock in you a few moments prior.
Yet you couldn't, and just had to watch him walk away.
Now, you haven't seen him in three days and were starting to get serious withdrawals. Whatever he was up to couldn't have come at a worse time.
You finally had the taste of his perfection, now he was gone, leaving you to deal with your desire alone.
You tried to preoccupy yourself with helping set up all the Christmas decorations around town as well as baking an absurd amount of treats.
You also managed to get him a little gift in the meantime, stuffing it in the cutest box with the prettiest wrapping paper.
God, you hoped he'd come back soon.
And luckily, he did!
You had heard from Maria that everyone had returned from their trip—safe and sound.
She had also told you that she was throwing a little Christmas get-together at her and Tommy's house to celebrate.
She was careful to mention that Joel would be in attendance.
So, that night, you whipped up your signature cinnamon apple recipe and put on your cutest outfit.
You topped it with some fuzzy reindeer antlers because you were in a very festive mood.
As you walked alone to Maria and Tommy's, you were freezing your ass off in your skirt and sweater. You wore tights with your skirt in hopes that it would help with the cold, but who were you kidding?
You didn't care, though. You just cared if Joel thought you looked pretty or not.
You pranced up the steps of their porch, letting yourself into the house and getting immediately bombarded by the hoard of people inside.
Maria made it seem like it was going to be a small thing, but the entire Jackson population seemed to be in her living room.
Thankfully, Tommy catches you come in and walks up to greet you. "Hey there stranger," He grins, looking down at the dish in your hands. "What you got there?"
"Brought desert," You chirp, handing it to him with a proud smile.
"Well well," He muses as he takes the glass container from you, looking it over with surprise. "Didn't think you could tie your own shoes, let alone bake anything."
You roll your eyes before scoffing. "You're just mad because I can tie my shoes and bake something before you can conjure a coherent thought."
Tommy fakes a wince before chuckling. "Alright, touché kid. We're gonna be playing charades in a little bit so stick around, alright?"
You nod, having absolutely no intention of 'sticking around' for charades. Tommy wanders off with your apples, finally giving you a moment to survey the party.
Obviously, you were looking for one person in particular.
You squeezed through all the crowds of people, scouring what felt like every room in the house.
But no dice.
Joel was nowhere to be found and sadness washes over you like a tidal wave.
Was he doing this on purpose?
Torturing you by depriving you of his presence? This was hell.
You plant yourself by the special eggnog and down several glasses to take the edge off.
You were tipsy in no time, it really didn't take much. It was like Maria just dumped an entire bottle of vodka in the bowl and splashed some milk in it. It was disgusting, really, but it was getting its job done.
As you hunched yourself over the bowl, someone tapped you on your shoulder.
You spin around, your hopes high.
"Joel!—Oh. Hi Connor." The disappointment you feel inside displays clearly in your tone.
You're now face to face with the boy who has been unsubtly trying to sleep with you for months.
"Hey there! You look fucking great tonight." He flirts, a smug grin on his face.
You grimace because you know he thinks he's so cool, even though you'd rather die than stand here with him right now.
"Thanks." You say flatly, turning back towards the eggnog and pouring yourself another glass. For some reason, Connor takes this as an invitation to step closer, now invading your space.
You don't even bother trying to hide your disgusted expression. His cologne is attacking your nostrils, and it doesn't even smell good.
"That skirt looks amazing on you." His eyes unabashedly drag along the skin of your legs, making you shiver in disgust. He takes it too far when his hand comes up to brush your arm.
"You come here with anyone?" He coos, leaning against the food table like he was hot shit or something.
You couldn't stand this douche. Just as you were about to tell him to fuck off or something, you feel someone looming over you.
"She did." A gruff voice comes from behind you, and you immediately recognize that it could only be one person.
You whip around, your face lighting up at the sight of Joel.
His expression is settled into a natural scowl, his jaw clenched and his eyes narrowed at the boy in front of you both. Even though he looked scary as shit, he was so fucking hot.
You're instantly horny just at the sight of him.
Connor scoffs, looking between the two of you, but your eyes stayed glued to Joel.
"Really? Him? But he's like—an old man." Connor spits, which immediately earns a glare from you.
Just as you're about to cuss him out, Joel beats you to it.
"Walk away before this old man breaks your jaw." His voice is stern, not to be tested.
It makes your core tighten with need.
Hearing the threat that he assumes to be all too real, Connor doesn't waste time scurrying off.
You turn back towards Joel, a warm, relieved smile spreading across your face. “Hi,” You whisper, wanting to hug him so bad but holding yourself back because he wasn’t a big fan of PDA. “M'so glad you're back." You do, however, step closer into his personal bubble.
His face softens when he finally looks down at you, and you can almost swear you see his lips curling up into a smile.
"Yeah, me too, kid." He husks out, looking between you and the bowl of half-empty eggnog. "Enjoyin' yourself?" He asks with somewhat of a disappointed look on his face, clocking that you were a little tipsy.
"Now I am." You answer truthfully, beaming up at him. "Have you been here the whole time? I was looking for you earlier but I couldn't find you."
Joel shifted on his feet, sliding his hands in his pockets. "Just got here. Tommy was talkin' my ear off at the door." He explained, an exasperated look on his face.
You laughed and nodded, knowing you both shared that experience.
"Are you having a good time, though?" You ask, actually curious because he seemed like he would rather be anywhere else right now.
He shrugs, brushing a hand through his short hair. "This Christmas holiday crap is givin' me a fuckin' aneurysm." He huffs out with complete honestly, scratching the back of his neck.
"What? Really? Why?" The shock and bewilderment in your voice isn't lost on Joel.
He sighs out, knowing you're about to explain the magical spirit of the season or whatever.
"The blizzards, people spazzin' out over gifts, all 'cause some fat guy is coming down chimneys—s'all just ridiculous."
You want to giggle at how actually annoyed he sounded, but you hold it down.
Grouchy old man.
"I'd let you come down my chimney," you flirt, but then correct yourself. "I have let you come down my—"
Joel shoots you a glare, daring you to finish your sentence.
You know when to cut your losses, so you don't.
"Well, speaking of gifts," You start, rummaging in your bag to pull out your present for him. You hold it up, the pink wrapping paper making him cock an eyebrow. "Merry Christmas, Scrooge."
Joel feels an unfamiliar feeling swimming around in his stomach at the sight.
He slowly takes the box from you, looking at it like it was a puzzle.
He really wasn't expecting anything from you. But he supposed people who have had the other persons genitals inside them should probably give them something for Christmas.
He finds himself very pleasantly surprised.
After a moment, he finds something to say.
"Couldn't find some manlier wrapping paper?" He coughs, his voice low but it's obvious he's joking with you.
You roll your eyes and scoff. "Just open it!"
Joel somewhat grins at your impatience but finally starts to open the box.
That grin drops off his face after he sees the contents, an immediate bittersweet feeling swelling in his chest.
You're watching his face so intently, so scared that he didn't like it based on his reaction.
Joel pulls out the watch from the box, clutching it tightly. He's not saying anything, so you hear yourself start to ramble.
"Do you like it? I just saw that the watch you wear is broken so I figured I'd get you a new one. If you don't like it I can take it back."
You're starting to crumble underneath the weight of his silence, anxiety bubbling in your gut. Just as you're about to ask him if he's okay, Joel finally looks back at you.
"S'real great. Thank you." His tone is genuine, you can tell he's telling the truth. But why does he look so pained?
"Of course." Your murmur, your eyes searching his. After a moment of silence, you clear your throat. "There's one more thing, actually."
Joel's shoulder slump. "You got me another present?" He asked tiredly, looking at you with disbelief.
A guilty smile paints your face before you gesture for Joel to follow you. "It's upstairs. C'mon."
He doesn't know how much more his heart could handle.
Reluctantly, he follows you up the stairs, wondering why you had a gift waiting for him in Tommy's guest bedroom.
You open the door and close it behind you both, purposefully not turning the lights on.
Joel walks into the center of the room, standing aimlessly and confused as to why you hadn’t flipped the light switch yet.
But then he hears the rustling of clothes and when you eventually turn the lights on, you're wearing nothing but a bra and panties.
His cock immediately gets hard.
"What do ya think you're doin'?" He whisper yells, trying to keep his eyes on your face but that proves to be impossible because your tits looked so good in lace.
"What? You don't like it? I bought it for you." You give him a 360 and he has to brace himself against the bed.
Fuck you looked good.
He sits down on the mattress, dragging a hand down his jaw in thought.
He's debating if he's really about to fuck you in his brother's house.
Why were you always making him go against his morals?
A few seconds of silence pass between the two of you before Joel snaps his eyes back to your figure.
"C'mere."
Got 'em.
You squeal excitedly before running over, slotting yourself between his legs and placing your hands on his shoulders.
In turn, his large hands come out to hold your hips, his gaze zeroing in on your perfect-looking cleavage that he was now eye-level with.
Just as he was about to slide his hands up to grope your breasts, you sink down to the floor.
Joel's puzzled as he watches you get on your knees, looking up at him with those mischievous eyes. He truly has no clue what you're up to, that is, until you bring your lips to the bulge in his jeans.
You place the softest kiss on his clothed hard-on, earning a groan from him.
Now he knows what you're trying to do.
He juts his hand out, holding you firm by your shoulder.
"You ain't gotta do that, sweetheart." Joel says softly, probably the softest you've ever heard him say anything.
Your body erupts in goosebumps when you hear the endearing pet name slip so effortlessly from his lips.
"I want to—been wanting to since, like, forever." You murmur, nuzzling your cheek against his inner thigh.
Joel wasn't sure what to think right now.
His past romantic experiences taught him that blowjobs were a hassle for women—something that they did only if they felt they had to.
But here you were, looking up at him with those wide eyes and wanting nothing more than his dick in your mouth.
You surprise him everyday.
His dick has literally never been harder, especially when you finally start unzipping his pants to let it spring free.
You gaze up at him again, waiting for his green light.
Joel had one hand white-knuckling the edge of the bed, while the other gently caressed the side of your head.
He offers a short nod of approval, already trying not to come just by the sight of his cock so close to your face.
You waste absolutely no time in grabbing the base of his dick with both hands, gingerly licking at his tip to warm him up.
Joel throws his head back, groaning at the feeling.
You tilt it up so you can drag your tongue all the way up his shaft, then bring your mouth down on his tip.
"Fuck," Joel curses, his eyes squeezing shut for a moment before snapping back open, not being able to look away from you.
Tears are falling from your eyes the farther you go down on him, the sensation of his head poking the back of your throat was making you dizzy.
But you don't stop. You're eager to please.
Your hands pump at the length you can't reach, while your warm mouth and tongue swirl around him.
You're too good at this, and Joel knows he's not gonna last long.
He can't help it when his hand in your hair turns into a fist, tightly gripping the strands like he was afraid you might go somewhere.
You moan when he accidentally pulls your hair forwards, forcing you deep on his cock. You bet he didn't even realize what he just did, based on the way his chest was heaving and his face looked so lost in pleasure.
You gag and more tears spill from your eyes, but you don't even dream about lifting off. If Joel was getting off on this, you were going to do more of it.
You moan, still keeping his cock in your mouth as you try to go even deeper down on it.
"Oh fuck—" Joel suddenly yanks your mouth off his cock, breathing heavily as he stares down at you.
You cough and sputter at the loss, looking up at him with that same fucked out expression you had last time.
"Why?" You manage to whine, wondering why he stopped you before he came.
Joel doesn't answer—instead he picks you up by your armpits and places you on the bed.
The quick change almost gives you whiplash, but Joel's surprisingly steady and husky voice guides you.
"On your stomach, pretty girl." He mutters as he taps your leg in a gesturing manner.
...Was he trying to kill you with that bedroom voice of his?
A whimper crawls its way out of your throat, your body having an audible reaction to his sweet words.
You flip over onto your stomach, instantly arching your back for him.
Being the impatient man he was, he rips your panties and throws them to the side in a lust-driven blur.
You literally didn't even care. Sure, they were new, but you'd just find another pair. The only two thoughts in your mind right now was Joel and Joel's dick.
Something warm and soft prods at your entrance before slipping to wedge between your folds, gathering up your slick.
You try to push back on it, but Joel holds you still, making you lose the rest of the small amount of composure you had left.
"Joelpleasefuckme," You sob, your cunt weeping for his cock. "need you so bad it hurts,"
You reach back, your hand finding his that was holding your hip and squeezing it.
Joel didn't want to admit to himself how much he loved the neediness in your voice, your obvious desperation made him harder.
"M'gettin' there, don't gotta beg me baby." He mutters, his hand that you grabbed intertwining with your fingers. His other hand was rubbing circles in the skin around your hips.
You feel that same sensation of his tip, but then Joel also brings his chest down to engulf your back.
You're already trembling, but when he begins to pepper kisses down the nape of your neck and back, all while slowly sheathing himself inside your pussy...
You effectively lose your mind.
"OhFUCKJoelloveitsomuch," You blabber, not having enough strength to hold yourself up anymore so your head drops into a pillow, muffling your moans.
Effortlessly, he pulls you back up so that your back is flush with his chest, his one arm wrapped around your stomach to keep you secure.
You rest the back of your head on his shoulder as she starts rocking into you, letting your body go limp because you know he's got you.
"Can you take it or do I need'a stop?" He asks, his tone making you dizzier.
You frantically nod, turning your head to the side to look at him. "I can take it, promise I can," you muster out between moans. "please don't stop—want your cock in me forever-"
Joel chuckles.
God, he really never stood a chance against you.
"I don't know about forever sweet thing, but I'll see what I can do for tonight, yeah?"
You giggle airily, like you weren't all there, nodding your head in acknowledgement. Your eyes are closed for a second but you feel his lips on yours, hungrily taking whatever they wanted.
You passionately return his kiss, mewling into it because his lips paired with the slow thrust of his dick was enough to drive you crazy.
The stretch of his cock is as close to heaven as you're ever gonna get.
His speed picks up which means your moans get louder, and Joel has no choice put to bring his other hand up and cover your mouth.
There's still a party going on downstairs, after all.
"Gotta be quieter baby," he pants, even though he's not slowing down his speed at all.
You whine into his hand, surprisingly loving the feeling of it because it's like he's swallowing you whole.
You feel that tight coil in your stomach slowly start to come undone, and you know you won't last long now. You try to tell Joel, but his hand is muffling your noises.
All the sudden, he speaks in your ear—his voice low and raspy. "Don't want you doin' this with anyone else, hear me?"
...Well.
You weren't expecting that.
His words probably made you soak the sheets because of how wet you became.
He sounded so stern when he said it too, making your heart flutter even more.
You nod, tears pouring from your eyes. He lets his hand off your mouth for a moment and you immediately jump at the opportunity to speak.
"Only want you, only ever wanted you, Joel—m'all yours, always been yours," You mewl after gasping for air, your body jolting with each of his deep thrusts.
"Fuck," Joel swears, quickly but carefully putting you down only to flip you over onto your back. Now in missionary, he buries himself all the way inside you again before dropping down so your faces are centimeters apart. "All mine, huh?" Joel reiterates, and you can't tell if he's mocking you or maybe asking for clarification.
Probably the ladder.
You agree nonetheless, a string of yes's spilling from your mouth.
"Yeah, just for me." He pants, slamming into you with more vigor than before. Your cunt is constricting around him like a vice, he's—not planning to last much longer either.
"M'gonna cum," you whine, wrapping your arms around his shoulders for support.
When Joel hears this, he drops a hand down to rub at your clit, making you come undone altogether.
"Ohfuckohfuckohfuck waitwait Joel-" You feel something..unique boiling, but then Joel's expert fingers release the flood gates.
You scream as you squirt all over his cock, your entire body writhing with the overstimulating pleasure.
Your juices soak him. When he see's this, he comes immediately.
He groans as he finishes inside you, unloading into your snug cunt. The feeling is incomparable for the both of you.
Once the haze of perfect pleasure dissipates, Joel realizes what he's just done.
"Shit," he grits, pulling out and watching his seed drip from your hole. "Fuck."
You manage to sit up on your elbows, looking up at him with teary eyes. "Don't worry," Your voice is quiet and cracked—you just had the squirt fucked out of you, after all. "I've been on the pill since we had sex the first time."
Joel looks down at you, stupefied.
Eventually, he feels his heart start beating again and huffs out a sigh of relief. "Thank christ." He leans back against the headboard, raking a hand through his hair and thinking about how that was a fucking close one.
You're lying next to him, still trying to catch your breath. "That felt so good," You manage to murmur, your body still shivering from the after shocks.
After you catch your breath, you turn your head to look up at him. "M'serious about what I said, about bein' yours."
He looks at you and your serious face for a moment, then brings his hand down to gently ruffle the top of your head.
"Yeah, I know you are." His texan drawl prominent.
"I'd let you brand me with a fire poker if thats what you wanted." You say flatly, no joking tone in your voice whatsoever.
Joel is taken back by the sudden jump in intensity, assessing you to make sure you were being for real.
You were, and when he realizes this, he shakes his head. "You've lost your damn mind." He grunts, dragging a hand down his face.
You shrug.
"I think a ring would do the trick." Joel mutters, not meaning for it to have some kind of underlying message or anything. But you're quick to jump to conclusions.
"A ring?" You squeal, moving to lay on his chest which earns a huff from him. "Didn't know we were already goin' steady like that, Miller!" You tease, the giddiest smile on your face.
"I didn't mean—quit. You know what I was sayin'." Joel grunts, looking at you with an unamused expression.
You don't quit though.
"My ring finger is a size 6, would love 2 carats but if you can swing for 3 that would be perfect—also, I hate silver bands, it has to be gold—but make sure it's not that super yellow fake gold, I like more rustic looks, I mean, if that wasn't obvious-" You cast him a glance, alluding to the fact that he was rustic looking.
Joel rolls his eyes before gently nudging you off him, getting off the bed and walking over to your clothes that you discarded a long time ago.
You continue rambling from your position on the sheets, staring up at the ceiling as you recited, in extreme detail, how you loved oval shaped diamonds the most.
He walks back over and manhandles you to sit up. "Lift up your arms." He mutters, putting your sweater back on you.
"Hm, gettin' some serious deja vu right now." You murmur, smiling up at him.
"Yeah, yeah, hush." He grumbles before sliding your tights and skirt back on as well.
The act is so kind and heartwarming. You mumble a thank you before standing up, almost falling back down because your legs were still a bit weak.
Joel made a motion like he would've caught you, reaching his arms out. "Careful." He warns, planting a hand on your lower back for stability. You giggle and nod, regaining your ability to walk slowly but surely.
You guys tried to discretely walk back down the stairs, but with Joel's hand on your back and your happy expression--it wasn't hard for people to guess what happened.
***
A couple days had passed since Tommy and Maria's party.
You were finishing up some hand-made Christmas cards on your desk when you heard a knock at your door.
"Coming!" You shout, leisurely making your way to the front door.
When you open it, no one's there. You look around, only seeing a familiar male figure walking away in the distance. When you step outside to shout after him, you feel yourself kick something.
Upon looking down, a small velvet box lays at your feet.
You pick it up carefully, opening it to reveal a gold ring placed so delicately inside. The small note inside reads:
Merry Christmas. -Scrooge
#smut#joel miller x reader#joel miller smut#joel miller#joel tlou#the last of us hbo#the last of us#tlou fanfiction#drabble#I need him so carnally
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Trumpism’s healthcare fracture-lines
If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/12/20/clinical-trial-by-ordeal/#spoiled-his-brand-new-rattle
There was never any question as to whether Trump would implement Project 2025, the 900-page brick of terrifying and unhinged policy prescriptions edited by the Heritage Foundation. He would not implement it, because he could not implement it. No one could. It's impossible.
This isn't a statement about constitutional limits on executive authority or the realpolitik of getting bizarre and stupid policies past judges or through a hair-thin Congressional majority. This is a statement about the incoherence of Project 2025 itself. You probably haven't read it. Few have. Realistically, few people are going to read a 900-page group work of neofeudalist fanfic shit out by the most esoteric Fedsoc weirdos the world has ever seen.
But one person who did read Project 2025 was the leftist historian Rick Perlstein, who was the first person to really dig into what a fucking mess that thing is:
https://pluralistic.net/2024/07/14/fracture-lines/#disassembly-manual
Perlstein's excellent analysis doesn't claim that Project 2025's authors aren't sincere in their intentions to wreak great harm upon the nation and its people; rather, his point is that Project 2025 is filled with contradictory, mutually exclusive proposals written by people who fundamentally disagree with one another, and who each have enough power within the Trump coalition that all of thier proposals have to be included in a document like this:
https://prospect.org/politics/2024-07-10-project-2025-republican-presidencies-tradition/
Project 2025 isn't just a guide to the masturbatory fantasies of the worst people in American politics – far more importantly, it is a detailed map of the fracture lines in the GOP coalition, the places where it is liable to split and shatter. This is an important point if you want to do more about Trumpism than run around feeling miserable and scared. If you want to fight, Project 2025 is a guide to the weak spots where an attack will do the most damage.
Perlstein's insight continues to be borne out as the Trump regime makes ready to take power. In a new story for KFF News, Stephanie Armour and Julie Rovner describe the irreconcilable differences among Trump's picks for the country's top public health authorities:
https://kffhealthnews.org/news/article/trump-rfk-kennedy-health-hhs-fda-cdc-vaccines-covid-weldon/
The brain-worm-infected-elephant in the room is, of course, RFK Jr, who has been announced as Trump's head of Health and Human Services. RFK Jr is a notorious antivaxer, chairman of Children’s Health Defense, a notorious anti-vaccine group. Kennedy's view is shared by Trump's chosen CDC boss, Dave Weldon, a physician who has repeated the dangerous lie that vaccinations cause autism. Mehmet "Dr Oz" Oz, the TV "physician" Trump wants to put in charge of Medicare/Medicaid, calls vaccines "oversold" and advocates for treating covid with hydroxychloroquine, another thoroughly debunked hoax:
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/health/2024/12/17/hydroxychloroquine-study-covid-19-retracted-trump/77051671007/
However, other top Trump public health picks emphatically support vaccines. Marty Makary is Trump's choice for FDA commissioner; he's a Johns Hopkins trained surgeon who says vaccines "save lives" (but he peddles the lethal, unscientific hoax that childhood vaccines should be "spread out"). Jay Bhattacharya, the economist/MD whom Trump wants to put in charge of the NIH, supports vaccines (he is also one of the country's leading proponents of the eugenicist idea of accepting the mass death of elderly, sick and disabled people rather than imposing quarantines during epidemics). Then there's Janette Nesheiwat, whom Trump has asked to serve as the nation's surgeon general; she calls vaccines "a gift from God."
Like "Bidenism," Trumpism is a fragile coalition of people who thoroughly and irreconcilably disagree with one another. During the Biden administration, this resulted in self-inflicted injuries like appointing the brilliant trustbuster Lina Khan to run the FTC, but also appointing the pro-monopoly corporate lawyer Jacqueline Scott Corley to a lifetime seat as a federal judge, from which perch she ruled against Khan's no-brainer suit to block the Microsoft-Activision merger:
https://www.thebignewsletter.com/p/judge-rules-for-microsoft-mergers
The Trump coalition is even broader than the Biden coalition. That's how he won the 2024 election. But that also means that Trumpism is more fractious and off-balance, and hence will be easier to disrupt, because it is riven by people in senior positions who hate one another and are actively working for each others' political demise.
The Trump coalition is a coalition of *cranks*. I'm using "crank" here in a technical, non-pejorative sense. I am a crank, after all. A crank is someone who is overwhelmingly passionate about a single issue, whose uncrossable bright lines are not broadly shared. Cranks can be right or they can be wrong, but we're hard to be in coalition with, because we are uncompromisingly passionate about things that other people largely don't even notice, let alone care about. You can be a crank whose single issue is eliminating water fluoridation, even though this is very, very stupid and dangerous:
https://yourlocalepidemiologist.substack.com/p/the-fluoride-debate
Or you can be a crank about digital rights, a subject that, for decades, was viewed as by turns either unserious or as a sneaky way of shilling for Big Tech (thankfully, that's changing):
https://pluralistic.net/2024/06/18/greetings-fellow-pirates/#arrrrrrrrrr
Cranks make hard coalition partners. Trump's cranks are cranked up about different things - vaccines, culture war trans panics, eugenics - and are total normies about other things. The eugenicist MD/economist who wants to "let 'er rip" rather than engage in nonpharmaceutical pandemic interventions is gonna be horrified by total abortion bans and antivax. These cranks are on a collision course with one another.
This is on prominent display in these public health appointments, and we're very likely about to get a test of the cohesiveness and capability of the second Trump administration, thanks to bird flu. Now that bird flu has infected humans in multiple US states, there is every chance that we will have to confront a public health emergency in the coming weeks. If that happens, the Trump public health divisions over masking, quarantine and (especially) vaccines (Kennedy called the covid vaccine the "deadliest" ever made, without any evidence) will become the most important issue in the country, under constant and pitiless scrutiny, and criticism.
Trump's public health shambles is by no means unique. The lesson of Project 2025 is that the entire Trump project is one factional squabble away from collapse at all times.
#pluralistic#hhs#antifx#rfk jr#project 2025#political science#trumpism#trump coalition#dave weldon#abortion#forced birth#cdc#fda#mark makary#Jay Bhattacharya#nih#Mehmet Oz#medicare#dr oz#Janette Nesheiwat#surgeon general#bird flu#rick perlstein#gop#coalitions#cranks
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𝓹𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝓾𝓹
— ( do note this ask was sent before my rules post was out but ill let it pass bcz it doesnt break any rules )
ah hello ! !! this is the first time im writing for jingyuan sama ..! hopefully its to your liking anon .. <:D tho i did self indulge a lil much on this ... hopefully you still like it x_x
also , yes .! i love ryona . i dig it a lot .. please dont b scared to req anything with dark themes .. i will be cheering you on !
pair — reader x jing yuan
wc — ~1k
contains — sub bottom char, dom top reader, established relationship, gn reader, possessive reader, jealousy, (false) cheating suspicions, reader is kinda fucked up in the head, size difference (smaller reader), thigh humping, dry humping, reader is pretty forceful
you couldn’t stand it.
the way he would ignore you sometimes, when you two just wouldn’t be able to have some pda for the sake of his reputation. it pissed you off.
you want to love him! show him off, maybe. hug him, kiss him, hold his hand.. all in public. but you can’t — because he has a reputation to uphold here. and what made you more mad is the fact you’d hear your own colleagues talk about him. how they want to get with him.
what pissed you off the most about today, though? you heard someone spreading rumors. dating rumors. not between you and jing yuan, no. (you would’ve appreciated that, really) it was between him and some other woman — one that he’s been working with for a good while.
you clicked your tongue, entering his office. even just from your face it was obvious you were in a horrible mood.
“oh?” he started, with that usual lazy smile of his — “my dear, something on your mind?”
he shifted in his seat, adjusting himself so you could sit yourself beside him — which, you do — letting out a tired sigh. “rumours about you again, love.” you respond.
“mm, it’s the one with that woman, i assume?”
you click your tongue again. just hearing anything related to her set you off — c’mon, now.. it’s not like they’re actually together.. your dearest would never, ever betray you in such a way.
but you see the way that woman was — how she was smiling and all. laughing those rumors off, all while clearly enjoying the attention she got. it disgusts you. it worsens your mood more and more as you thought about it.
the general could sense your frustration — almost as if he read your mind. his expression softened a little bit, this time looking at you. watching you biting on your nail, whilst the other hand was balled into a fist, resting on your thigh.
“hey,” you looked back at him. the frustration was clear in your eyes. even you, yourself didn’t get it. what were you so angry about…? you can’t help but take it out on him. “you love me, right, jing yuan?”
“of course I do.” he replies — it’s short. it’s obvious. but in your messed up little head, it felt like nothing but a lie.
“prove it.”
“wha–?”
“prove it, i said.” you lean into him, a hand against his stomach. the gold part of his belt felt cool against your palm. for a second, it gives you shivers.
“here..?” the general’s voice was filled with uncertainty. “the door is still unlo–”
“that doesn’t matter.” you interrupt, “they’re not allowed to come in, right? locked or not. just tell them to leave if someone knocks. simple.”
jing yuan gulped down, eyeing the door once more before giving in — fumbling with his belt. slowly but surely getting that corset-like piece of armor loose and discarding it completely.
he’s so obedient whenever you were mad…
“c’mere.” you pat on your thigh, inviting him to sit on it — he does, obeying you. you were upset, he didn’t want your mood to go even lower. though, due to jing yuan being bigger than you, he was quite hesitant on putting his entire weight — he knows he’s quite heavy.. but you insist he sits down properly.
he felt shy all of a sudden — putting his hands on your shoulders, nuzzling his face into your neck. you didn’t know if this shyness was a result of the position, or the fact the door was very much unlocked — maybe both.
you had a hand on his lower back, as if inviting for the white-haired general — your free hand decided to run through his hair. it’s so soft… how could you not?
jing yuan lets out a whimper, hips moving on his own. slowly but surely running them up and down your thigh. his own legs shaking. you slip your hand into the side of his pants — feeling around his waist. he jolts at your cold hands, letting out a small gasp. those hands of yours continue to trace through his body, feeling his breath grow a little faster. feeling all over his back, his hips, his waist, him. just him.
you wanted to escalate this, though, you heard something. something he feared. a knock at the door.
“jing yuan, sir?”
a voice is heard, calling to the general. you could clearly hear his breath hitch. “a– ah.. who—nnh–!”
those hands of yours continued to tease him. featherlight touches all over his body, teasing him by slipping your hands into his pants every now and then — watching your darling general explain why the person couldn’t come in — stuttering on his words, trying to reason with them..
you felt mean today. you were in a shitty mood, after all.
he lets out a sigh of release when they finally decide to go — whoever that was leaving his office alone for another time. finally, he gets to calm down.
“i love you.” you whisper into his ear suddenly, “you love me too, right? you wouldn’t go for that woman, right? right?”
why did you doubt him, even?
you don’t know, nor did you care. all you wanted to hear was an ‘i love you, too’ from the general.. your general.
his weight was kind of crushing you.. but you didn’t mind it much. you pressed a kiss onto his neck, sucking into it to form a hickey. then another… and another. it didn’t take too long for his entire neck to be covered by them. you loved it.. marking him up as yours (as if wasn’t already..)
“m’gonna–” his grinding was growing a bit more desperate — damn, already?
“go on. show me how much you love me.” — those words made him whimper, closing his eyes. you pulled on his hair, yanking his head so jing yuan was looking at you — grabbing his face with one of your hands and inviting him into a messy kiss — tongue being forcefully shoved into his mouth.
“i love you, i love you, i love you.. mmMH—!” he said between eager gasps, feeling his orgasm washing over him. you could, too — that warm feeling on your thigh.
he wraps his big arms around you, moans being muffled by the kiss. he just couldn’t get enough, can he? he wouldn’t even care anymore if someone came in and saw him this way. neither did you. at least they’d know you were his.
“i love you, darling. please ruin me..”
hsr masterlist ♥︎
#♱ library of ruins .#♱ rabbit hole .#✸ astral express .#✸ cloud knights .#✦ jing yuan .#hsr#hsr smut#honkai star rail#honkai star rail x reader#sub hsr#jing yuan#jing yuan x reader#sub jing yuan#dom reader#sub character
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pretty doll | kim line (m.)
genre/au: smut, slight bdsm? (i have no idea what AU this is but you’ll see)
summary: when Namjoon left, he said to stay put and you obeyed as usual but why did he leave you with his roommates when they were this hot?
wc & rating: 5.6k | 18+
warnings/content: explicit sexual content, dom/sub dynamics, oral (both receiving), fingering, deep throating, face fucking, unprotected sex, double penetration (spitroasting, we're back lmao), exhibitionism (public sex 🗿), praise kink, reverse cowgirl, edging, cum play, degradation, size kink, groping, pet names, etc.
a/n: happy taejincember y'all it's been a long ass time! anyways, this was my dream years ago so it's initially written in 2021 and i'm finally posting it lmao. thank you to the amazing Danica ( @dee-ehn ) for this very very gorgeous banner & divider 💞
It’s hard to explain the relationship between you and Namjoon.
But you never bother explaining when people around you ask because you’re not the type to put labels anyway, and so is he. This simply is an arrangement and you’re not together by any means so you’re both free to do whatever you want, with whoever you want.
There are only two rules that you both have been following for a while now though. One is simple; no kissing on the lips with other people but the other one’s a bit complicated. Enough that it took a while before you got used to this dynamic between you and Namjoon, causing small arguments here and there around the beginning. However, he has always been patient and handled you with care, showing it to you in his own ways that you learned to tune in with it in time.
Like right now.
.
“ahh..Namjoon” you whine for the nth time to no avail. He's been eating you out since the moment you arrived here in the park earlier like a starved man as he always does. Well, according to him, your cunt’s the only one he devours, part of the other rule that you both agreed on.
When his mouth is not on you, his two fingers are, sometimes three, before he stops. He does this when he senses that you're about to cum, chuckling deeply before releasing the swing that you’re sitting on to tease you further. You’ve been squirming nonstop on it due to the cold breeze that’s been hitting your wet core since the first time he fingered you here.
You do love it but Namjoon’s mercilessly doing this to you...
In some random playground, in broad daylight, in this chilly weather.
Good thing there’s no one in sight but even then, that would’ve been the last thing on your mind with how Namjoon’s torturing your pussy like he’s punishing you. It also doesn’t help that you’re not wearing any panties as that is what he prefers when you're with him. He reasons that it’ll be easier to finger you or eat you out anywhere he likes.
He does the same. Going commando each time you go out since you’re always needy when he’s near, always wanting to suck him off, always wanting to sit on his cock no matter where the both of you are.
One of his strong arms catches the curve of the swing seat you’re sitting on, stopping it from hitting him when it sways forward. Then he brings back his fingers inside your swollen pussy again, making you shut your eyes, breath hitching with each intrusion. All you can focus on is his long fingers massaging your abused walls at this point, your knuckles turning white while gripping the swing chain so hard because you’re nearing your peak once again.
Your eyes suddenly open when he reaches that soft spot inside you, moaning louder than you’ve already been as soon as you lock your eyes with him. He’s looking at you intently, as usual, never straying his eyes from observing your face while his fingers continue pumping in and out of your pussy.
Namjoon’s always been handsome but he’s looking more gorgeous to you from where he’s kneeling, not seeming to mind the small wood chips digging into his denim jeans. The strands of his short honey-blond hair above his undercut being blown by the wind, causing your walls to flutter more around his wet fingers whose pace is now turning slow. You squeak when Namjoon continues to retreat his fingers, spreading your pussy lips apart before pushing in, scissoring your pussy again.
And then he removes them abruptly and doesn’t swing you back this time.
“sorry doll, we have to get going. i have some last-minute holiday shopping to do”
You pout at Namjoon’s words, eyes nearly watering at what he said. His tone’s apologetic as he stands up from the ground, holding his hand out for you to take but you’re still reluctant to leave. He retracts and waits for you instead at the wooden edge of the box, face teasing as he wipes his cum-coated fingers against his denim jeans which further added to your distress.
“i didn’t cum yet” you whine in displeasure, looking up at him with big eyes from your seat, hoping that’ll change his mind about staying a bit and letting you finish but he doesn’t falter.
So you’re back to pouting, the dazed sensation from his edging beginning to leave your body.
Realizing that he’d never really budge, you stand up and turn around to check if you didn’t leave any mess on the swing seat. Thankfully there’s none, though the embarrassment stays in you despite frequently fooling around with Namjoon in public places like this. You’re trying to pull down your skirt as you’re nearing him, to make sure the wind doesn’t blow it up and expose your bare pussy to any possible passerby.
He seems to be enjoying seeing you sulk as the grin on his face widens, "later okay? you can stay at my place for a while".
Namjoon cages you with his big arms and you lean on his chest, nodding in relief at what he said. He never breaks his promises so you have a hunch that he must be planning something for later then. Excitement courses through you at the thought but his edging made you a bit hungry though, your stomach growling a bit which doesn’t go unnoticed by him.
"let's go Joonie, hope you have my favourites there" you smile sheepishly as you look up at him and he chuckles in return, one hand sliding down to your waist to hold you as you both start walking to his place.
The fancy apartment building looms over you both as you arrive at Namjoon's place. He shares it with his two other close friends, Seokjin and Taehyung. They’re gorgeous like him and each time Namjoon brings you here, you couldn’t help but steal glances and ponder their whereabouts when they’re not around. You’re rarely here that’s why and when you are, they're either both absent or the other one's missing.
You’re wondering if they’re here this time though, you haven't seen those two in a while.
.
Namjoon opens the door with his own key, pulling you inside after setting them on the key rack. It’s something his roommates have implemented given the number of times he lost his keys. Their place is not that big for three people but the interior shows each of their tastes that somehow complemented one another. It's because they’ve known each other for years, gradually learning more about each other that you’re sometimes amazed at how synced they are in what they do.
You instantly shiver at the change of temperature as soon as you enter their unit, the heater’s finally switched on much to Namjoon’s delight. The heat is warming you up but you’re feeling warmer seeing both his roommates sitting by the round kitchen table.
Namjoon nods to them as a greeting while he walks hurriedly towards his room. This leaves you awkwardly standing by the door, contemplating if you should follow him or join his roommates in the kitchen. You’re still not close with Taehyung and Seokjin despite Namjoon bringing you here for a little while now. You talk to them of course but Namjoon subtly demands your attention all the time. Quite a contrast because he never displays affection towards you when other people are around. It’s just him by nature, seeing as you’re not together anyways so you respected that.
Unable to decide, you drop to your knees to unbuckle your platform heels, facing sideways so they won't get to see your bare pussy. Namjoon’s just by his bedroom and you’re thinking of following him there for a quick fun. You’re still on edge but disappointment arises in you when he comes out with some bags in hand just as you’re out of your wedges.
Namjoon takes a piece of paper from his pocket with one hand, unfolding it to double-check the list of things that he has to purchase. He’s already set on this, turning to you to give a quick hug before putting back his olive green jacket on.
"behave doll, hmm?" he pats your hair and you smile in return, dismissing the joke that you were about to make about his high-time plan as you bid him goodbye.
Seokjin and Taehyung know of you from the times Namjoon brought you to their place. They’re also aware of your "relationship'' so they aren’t fazed at how you and their roommate treat each other. Namjoon leaving you here alone with them is surprising though, they never thought that he’d let you out of his sight especially when other guys are around.
Before your arrival, they’re at the roundtable, munching the Christmas cookies that Seokjin baked earlier. Both men are facing the door when you and Namjoon enter, allowing Taehyung to steal glances at your bare legs. Seokjin elbows him after noticing and he coughs loudly before adjusting the way he sits and greeting Namjoon back. He shouldn’t look again but your skirt’s riding up and he’s tempted so he took another cookie to stop himself.
You haven’t looked at them but they can tell that you’re conflicted about whether to talk to them or not. However, your expression changes as soon as you spot the fridge, approaching it with eager eyes. Each man was about to talk to you but the greeting on their tongues halted when you suddenly bent your body after opening the fridge, exposing your bare pussy in front of them.
Taehyung grips his glass full of milk as he stares at your glistening cunt, almost choking as he tries to chew the cookies he's eating. He knows that he should look away because you’re technically Namjoon’s girl but he can’t help it. There's no way you’re not aware of what you’re doing to them, meaning, you might know how they see you already. He gulps a large amount of milk to clench his drying throat while he can hear Seokjin coughing excessively beside him.
“Give me some Tae” Seokjin discreetly asks beside him, still coughing a bit from choking on the cookies. Taehyung doesn’t even realize that he’s been holding the box of milk with his other hand this whole time, turning around to pass it to Seokjin and noticing the guilt in his hyung’s eyes when their eyes meet.
Like his younger roommate, Seokjin also can’t stray his eyes from your cunt. He tried looking away from your smooth legs when you came in with Namjoon earlier but he can't possibly do that now that you're purposely doing this in front of them. Not only that it shocked them but it also confused him a bit. Sure, he noticed your subtle glances on them before but that’s the only thing you’ve done so far. Still, he’s not sure what you’re planning but the mere absence of your undies shouldn’t have been a surprise; you’re Namjoon's “doll” after all.
Taehyung thinks it's an invitation while he knows Seokjin will think it's a test. He’s not sure but you’re pushing their limits right now and the self-control that he’s been holding all this time is so close to snapping. You might be oblivious but Namjoon usually teases both him and Seokjin, flaunting you by putting you on his lap whenever you come over. He may act indifferent but his eyes hold that devilish look in them, knowing exactly how his roommates get riled up when you visit. You on the other hand are unaware, never giving Namjoon’s gestures any thought as something else.
Seokjin didn’t think Namjoon would use you this time though, his most prized possession.
He leaves the table as soon as he recovers from coughing, going straight to the living room’s sofa which is just right across the roundtable to get a moment of clarity. That's failing cause he can see you and Taehyung from here. His younger roommate still sitting on his staring at you, more like at your swollen, wet cunt, fuck.
Seokjin shakes his head, thinking how absurd this whole thing is. Here they are, his younger friend still ogling at your pussy and him struggling from the pull to look back at your bent position.
The living room’s pretty tense at the moment. None of them can guess what your next step is or if you even have one.
But you surely do, at least that’s what Taehyung’s been thinking, or you won’t be doing this without Namjoon around. His ogling gets disrupted when you stand up from the fridge, turning around to close it with a pack of soft breadsticks in your hands. He hadn't seen those when he scoured the fridge earlier so Namjoon must've hidden your favourite snack where only you can find that's why it took you a while.
Or maybe, you're simply teasing them.
He watches you sit beside him, excitedly opening the box of snacks Namjoon prepared for you. Your sole focus seems to be only on your food, not looking at him or anywhere else. He wonders if you’re purposely ignoring him though, prompting him to make the first move but he won't.
Until you give in first.
Initially, Taehyung wanted to break the air and start a conversation with you as soon as you sat beside him but you seemed to be very hungry. Namjoon surely did something to you before coming here, that explains why you've been agitated this whole time. Your pussy lips were twitching earlier and your display of hunger just proves Taehyung's assumption.
For now, he’ll let you eat in peace to gain back that energy that he’ll drain as soon as you give him a sign. His eyes, however, can't stop staring at how you bite a breadstick. Your luscious lips closing on it looks so inviting that it’s making his mind imagine how they would look really beautiful around his dick.
"do you want some Tae?" you surprise him with that soft voice of yours, eyes looking straight at him as you bite the breadstick and slowly chew it in your mouth, without blinking.
There it is.
Taehyung secretly smiles, almost cursing and closes his eyes for a bit before standing up. He doesn't miss the surprised look on your face when you just realize that he's only wearing a towel underneath. He was showering earlier and finished just in time when you and Namjon arrived. Of course, he didn’t wanna miss seeing you just in case you were only here for a bit, changing can wait.
He can’t pass the opportunity up even though Namjoon’s aware of his attraction to you already. Taehyung never hid it unlike Seokjin, he was very obvious since the first time they met you. He knows that he shouldn’t feel this way, the thought of hitting on you never even crossed his mind before.
But you’re extremely making it hard for him right now.
His grin widens as he walks around the table to stand before you, prompting you to turn and look up at him.
“yeah, i want some”
He retracts his smile as his eyes meet yours. Big eyes looking at him questioningly though he’s starting to believe that you know what you’re doing to him when you swallow the breadstick entirely, your lips moving back up and slowly sucking the tip while the naive look in your eyes is slowly changing into a cheeky one.
Fuck it, he’ll just apologize to Namjoon later.
Taehyung sees your eyes scanning his half-naked body until they descend toward his crotch, a bulge already visible. Hesitation suddenly emerges in your eyes because Namjoon could come home any minute and catch you both in a compromising position. But then you put down the breadstick you’re holding, reaching out to the wet tissue on the table to clean your hands before putting them on top of the towel that’s covering him.
He notices right away that you understand how he’s expecting you to do something to solve his huge problem. He looks at Seokjin who’s giving him the “don’t you dare” look but he sets his jaw at him, his eyes determined on his decision to play with you. He shifts back at your eager eyes looking up at him while one of your hands starts rubbing his bulge, realizing that you’re waiting for something from him.
“go ahead, baby”
Your core clenches at the pet name, smiling excitedly at Taehyung as you pull down the towel that’s wrapped around his hips. What welcomed you is a very angry-looking huge cock that almost slaps you in the face, its tip already coated with precum. You bite your lower lip at how delicious it looks, your mouth watering to taste him.
Namjoon may punish you for it later on but you can't help but be petty that he didn't let you cum earlier. Placing your hand around Taehyung's throbbing cock, you stick out your tongue to give his tip kittenish licks. He lets out a deep groan at that and you really like it so you begin stroking the rest of his cock, hearing more of his deep moans for the first time.
Seokjin calls your name when you're about to swallow Taehyung's cock in your mouth. Why he did, he doesn’t fucking know. He just felt left out somehow even which is hilarious seeing as he’s the one who’s purposely avoiding you. He’s not doing any better when he can clearly see you and his youngest roommate.
Staying away was no use as he couldn’t get the image of your wet cunt out of his mind. He should've just gone back to his room to end this madness, at least one of them has to be sensible. But Taehyung already gave in and Seokjin might not get another chance to have you.
He’s been doing his best to calm himself down from wanting to pounce on you since you are Namjoon’s doll.
But then you turn to him in surprise and he sees your eyes move down towards his crotch, to the bulge that he’s been sporting. He didn't think you'd bother entertaining him when you're already occupied with helping Taehyung.
Seokjin watches how you mindlessly bite your lip while looking at it. He’s fucked. He’d been too obvious and maybe calling your name earlier was also because he wanted to see this exact reaction from you.
Looking back at Taehyung, he sees the smirk on the younger roommate's face, already knowing that his hyung is definitely getting more riled up at his stunt. He hates how the younger’s plan is working even more so when your hands start pumping Taehyung absentmindedly, causing the younger one to hiss. It's a sight that Seokjin finds so hot that he couldn’t help but take out his dick from his pants and calls your name again.
Your eyes bulge out at how big his cock is, and like entranced, you stand up and leave Taehyung standing there. While approaching Seokjin, your eyes never strayed away from his cock. You want a taste since it’s so big like Taehyung’s, yearning to feel its weight in your mouth.
However, he stops you right when you are about to kneel between his legs, turning your body instead which confuses you. Your eyes search for Taehyung, who's still watching you both from where he's standing, fully naked with the towel now perched on the chair that you were sitting on earlier.
A frustrated whine was going to erupt from you until you felt Seokjin’s fingers lifting your skirt, making you bend forward as a reflex. Thinking he’s going to eat you out, Taehyung immediately goes in front of you to help you balance but Seokjin’s just staring at your bare pussy. You want to lower your body to sit down on him so you can also pay attention to Taehyung, whose cock is in front of your face. Seokjin stops you though, hands moving to spread your ass cheeks further so he can see your twitching cunt more.
"why nothing under baby?" he finally asks, his raspy voice filled with curiosity as to why you went commando today. This is the first time that he's talking to you directly other than calling your name earlier, adding the "baby" in it now that causes a stir in your stomach.
"mhhmm, so that he can fuck me anywhere" you whine, hoping that he'll hurry up so they can fuck you already.
Seokjin should’ve expected it, and the mention of Namjoon momentarily brings back his guilt about what he and Taehyung are about to do with you. As if you can sense his dilemma, he watches your head turn around as your hand covers his, smiling at him to assure that everything is okay with you.
Relief washes through Seokjin's face as he closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. He’s not just daydreaming this whole thing because you do want them both. He doesn’t know what to do later when Namjoon arrives but for now, he’ll just enjoy what you’re offering. While he’s still contemplating, you decide to sit down on him, your damped pussy lips sliding on top of his swollen dick which causes him to groan inwardly.
You don’t waste time as soon as you settle on Seokjin’s lap and take Taehyung’s awaiting cock in your mouth, sucking half of him off slowly and giving kitten licks around his tip until he gets impatient, one hand withdrawing from holding up your arms to grip your head.
Taehyung eyes you with a warning look, clearly not amused at your teasing so you immediately take him whole until his tip reaches the back of your throat. Enjoying the sound of your gagging, he thrusts again, causing your head to bump against Seokjin who’s dipping his head a little to focus on finding any ounce of resistance within himself. Taehyung finds this entertaining, noticing his older roommate refusing to hold you even though you started grinding on Seokjin’s dick unconsciously while sucking him off.
“let go hyung, we all knew how much you want to fuck her”
Seokjin seethes at Taehyung’s remarks, glaring at him because the younger one’s right no matter how much he denies it. Despite the innocence you’ve been showing each time Namjoon brings you over, the look you always give to him and Taehyung is quite the opposite. You do this without Namjoon noticing but they do, further confusing them about how you see them.
They shouldn’t care in the first place but the mutual interest between you is what pushes Seokjin to release a deep sigh before gripping your bare waist, hard.
“fuck”
You hear Seokjin curse before moaning at his hard grip, making your breathing quicken. Finally.
Out of all of them, he’s the hardest for you to decipher, not knowing what he’s capable of doing so you’re beyond thrilled now that he’s finally giving in to you. Your excitement increases while hearing him rummage through the side table’s drawer, possibly looking for a stash of condoms so you release Taehyung’s cock from your mouth to turn around to stop Seokjin.
Revealing to them both your intention all along. You never let anyone fuck you raw aside from Namjoon as it is the same for him if he’s fucking others but-
"i want to treat you..", you try wiggling your hips under his grip before looking up in front to meet Taehyung’s blown-out pupils as you continue, "the both of you". Taehyung’s hold on your arms tightens, causing you to wince a bit but a grin graces your lips which didn’t go unnoticed by him. Seokjin stops his movements too, still processing what you just said before bringing his attention back to you.
"you're gonna treat us baby?" a yelp comes out from you when Seokjin suddenly slaps your bare pussy. He spreads your legs further, both hands creeping in your inner thighs under your skirt until you feel his fingers prod on your already wet folds but one of your hands left the other man’s grip to stop him.
"N-Namjoon fingered me already" you inform them both breathlessly, acting a bit shy with your tone but both men know what your real intentions are through the mischief that they see in your eyes.
Your skirt’s still on and Seokjin starts tugging it, clearly demanding for it to be removed so you let go of Taehyung's hold so you can take it off, with Seokjin assisting you until the skirt's discarded somewhere on the floor.
Now you’re only on your pastel purple buttoned-up crop top as Seokjin guides your hips back to him. He fists his cock with one hand, guiding it along your folds as he brings your body down to his cock. When your cunt finally opens up to him, Seokjin releases a guttural moan, closing his eyes as your warm walls envelop his cock.
"big, oh fuck, so big" you whimper, mouth falling open at the slow intrusion because fuck, you feel like his cock could literally split you in half. You continue lowering yourself more, with Taehyung assisting you with your arms until the back of your thighs touches Seokjin's firm thighs.
“can see your pussy now being stuffed clearly with my cock"
Seokjin breathes out against your shoulders, his mind reeling at how fast everything happened. You were just teasing them both earlier and now his cock’s inside you. You’re even letting him fuck you raw, which he never expected. He’d think this treat from you is too much but who is he to complain? he's been wanting to fuck you since the first time Namjoon introduced you to them.
You grab Taehyung's hips as leverage, pulling yourself up so you can position your legs by Seokjin's thighs. Planting one of your palms at the edge of the couch, you drop your body back to Seokjin's lap and start rolling your hips on his dick. The man behind you groans in surprise, hands latching on your hips to guide you at once.
Suddenly though, Taehyung grips your hair to pull you back towards his neglected cock which you immediately put back in your mouth. Humming around him, you bob your head faster and Taehyung couldn’t help but buck his hips further in your mouth at that.
"fuck, Joon-hyung must've trained your throat a lot hmm? you take me very well baby" he caresses your head and you preen at his praise, opening the back of your throat more to take him deeper than you already are.
“still.. so tight” Seokjin continues to moan deeply behind you, hands alternating between groping what he can touch and guiding your hips as he bounces you on his cock.
Taehyung lolls his head back at how warm your mouth is around him. He only opens them when you begin moaning more around his cock again, his eyes focusing this time on your bouncing breasts. Your crop top is doing nothing to hold them.
“hyung, take it off” he signals a dazed Seokjin who starts unbuttoning your crop top right away.
Taehyung takes a sharp breath, seeing your breast bounce freely now that you’re fully naked that he couldn’t resist fucking your mouth more. His rough thrusts cause your eyes to water which Taehyung finds so sexy, his cock twitching at the sight. Seokjin’s the same with how his hands are greedily groping your bare tits, trying to thrust up into you at the same time.
"pretty..pretty doll..shit"
Your legs are on fire at this point but you asked for this and it’s worth seeing both men crumble because of you. Taehyung’s about to cum, his lower abs flexing and his hand's tightening their hold on your head. He spews more curses so you eagerly match his thrust, winking at him as soon as he locks eyes with you which takes Taehyung by surprise.
He might not be aware of your dynamics with Namjoon as much as Seokjin’s but he knows his hyung.
He’s fucked but it stupidly triggered his release. He cums a lot, so much that even if you try swallowing all of them you couldn’t and you’re not allowed to. Instead, you open your mouth to show him how you play his cum around inside your mouth before letting it dribble on your chin, dripping through the column of your throat down to your perky breasts that Seokjin has been massaging nonstop.
His labouring breaths are a sign that he’s about to cum as well but you’re just the same, feeling the lower band of your stomach about to snap. Now that your mouth’s not stuffed with Taehyung’s cock anymore, your moans are loud and clear. Seokjin’s hitting your soft spot continuously, pushing you closer and closer to your orgasm.
“shit, omy-” a loud cry came out from you, your back arching and jerking while you gushed on Seokjin’s cock. Your head landed on his shoulder, whining at his unchanging pace as he too was chasing his own release. Seokjin’s hold on you got firmer and he eyes Taehyung quickly before pulling you up, the latter catching you while he shoots his cum on your ass.
You surprise Taehyung when you nuzzle your face against his groin, licking his cock clean after and an amusing smile appears on his handsome face.
“cockslut” he mutters, brushing your messy hair away from your sweaty face. The raunchy pet name elicits a giggle from you as you let go of his hardening cock. Unbelievable. The grin on your lips stays on until you feel your legs straining from exhaustion.
Seokjin’s cumming so much that when you tried sitting back on his lap, his cock’s still releasing more cum. You take his twitching cock and place it between your ass cheeks as you sit, rubbing on it which causes him to release even more.
All three of you are exhausted, feeling the very wet and sticky cum on your bodies and his softening cock between your soaked pussy. Your eyes are barely open but a satisfied grin graces your lips. Taehyung decides to kneel in front of you, playing with the drying cum around your breasts while you're resting. They’re still sensitive to Seokjin’s nonstop assault the entire time they’re fucking you.
He grabs your face, stroking your cheek with his thumb as he smiles at you fondly.
"baby's a whore"
"yeah, filthy baby" Taehyung muses in response, looking at you with amusement. Seokjin does the same, murmuring praises beside your head and leaving a peck on your shoulder while caressing your arms.
"filthy doll"
The deep voice that answers from the corner of the room halts the three of you, immediately changing the once dazed atmosphere.
Taehyung’s eyes turn to you who mirror the same nervous eyes as he does. You start to squirm on Seokjin’s lap as you see Namjoon standing by the door, holding some bags full of Christmas decorations and gifts. His expression is void of anything which makes Taehyung and Seokjin at a loss on what to do next. The apology is ready to come out from him as he eyes Seokjin who turns quiet and shares the panicking eyes, unsure of how to hold you now that Namjoon caught the three of you.
“hyung-” he starts nervously, his plan on fucking you after was replaced by the need to explain the whole situation to his newly-arrived roommate but Namjoon cuts him off, only staring at your dishevelled form with one raised brow.
"did you enjoy your treat doll?"
Both men are too stunned to speak at Namjoon’s question, their eyes widening in confusion at their roommate and how this conversation’s progressing. Namjoon normally doesn’t share what’s his and as much as they’re not sure if you are, you’re still considered as his so the man’s amused face further confused the other two.
"i did", you meekly answer him, wiping Taehyung’s cum from your mouth with the back of your hands before standing up with wobbling legs as you walk towards him.
Seokjin hisses when your body’s warmth leaves him, instantly grabbing the tissues on the table to start cleaning himself up and putting back his clothes on. Taehyung’s still fully naked with his perplexed expression, eyes never leaving you as you walk towards their roommate so Seokjin hands him something to cover himself up with.
Namjoon catches your waist, eyes scanning through the mess of his roommates’ cum on your body. He takes a coat from the standing rack’s hook and puts them on you, ignoring the stains of cum that will transfer (presumably if it’s his). He stares at you for a bit and you’re beaming at the pride in his eyes for fooling his roommates and getting what you want at the same time.
A smile slowly appears on his lips and to your surprise, Namjoon kisses your forehead gently, in front of his roommates who mirrored your surprised reaction. This is the first time Taehyung and Seokjin witnessed Namjoon be affectionate to you with them around. But his strong grip around your waist says the opposite, one hand coming down to grope your ass, earning a whimper from you after. Just a reminder to everyone who you really belong to.
"do you have my request?" you break the silence in the living room, acting all normal like you didn’t just fuck Namjoon’s roommates in their living room and him catching you three. Your focus is only on him, looking at his eyes with obvious intent.
"of course" he gives a dimpled smile and takes your hand. He stops by the table to put down some of the shopping bags except for a specific bag that you’ve been eyeing since he arrived.
As you both retreat to Namjoon’s room, he turns to his roommates who are still glued to where they’re standing.
"consider this as a birthday gift, for you both"
e/n: ngl i miss being this nasty lol 21 year old me was definitely something else. the writing's a bit different since i haven't opened this doc in about 2 years 😅
#bts x reader#bts smut#taehyung#taehyung x reader#taehyung smut#taehyung imagine#taehyung scenarios#namjoon#namjoon smut#namjoon x reader#kim namjoon#bts namjoon#seokjin#seokjin x reader#seokjin smut#kim seokjin#bts#bts jin#bts scenarios#bts fanfic#bts fic#bts imagines#bangtan#bts fanfiction#bts au#bts x you#bts imagine#kpop smut#kpop imagines#kpop fanfic
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so like I saw this entire argument for the first time when someone reblogged this post a few weeks ago, and was like "well it was two years ago, it's cleary a reach but i'm not that invested, they clearly just REALLY want to yell about this issue of Batgirl rather than go with the most obvious interpretation that was clearly intended, whatever, it's fine" (If they had Jordanna bring up "are you poor" after Steph talked about "her own issues" it is supposed to imply she was poor, whether Steph answers or not (and why would she answer that), otherwise why would the comic bring it up, it's not deep)
but then i was looking at one of my old amvs and
Stephanie's house looks kind of rough there. Yet this was a flashback? No earthquake?
man looks rough there too and this was way before the earthquake. weird that doing-well middle class people wouldn't repair a cracked wall and window.
As I said, that there are plenty of other comics that show Stephanie's house looking run down, this is exhibit A that I just happened to run across. I didn't really have the energy to actually look but turns out I didn't have to.
Steph's dad put the family in a financial hole. That is stated in this very comic. "Using all their money" every time he comes back means a bunch of stuff will pile up and you have to dig yourself out of it. Including the house being in disrepair. In-universe, it's only been like what, a year? less? since the last time he did that in most comics she's in. People don't just automatically recover from that. And that was most of Steph's childhood, Arthur doing that. This is a comic where "we have financial issues" is directly bought up. Steph's Mom likely has very little savings.
That's all I say. Comics are inconsistent. The writers are not as thoughtful about finances as the fans sometimes. It's often hard to nail down a single interpretation. But people think Steph has financial issues because there's more than one comic where her house looks rough, because it's directly stated, it's not out of nowhere.
Like I said, not super invested, I'm not going to say else anything past this post. Steph isn't obviously in danger of being thrown out on the streets, there's miles of difference between her and someone who was literally homeless like Jason, but "struggling" isn't a reach. It's been accepted as a fact for 15 years, since the first time I got into comics, with every fan I talked to, and this is the first time I've seen it so hotly contested, even by people who were following my series of scans on scans_daily (liking it or disliking it), having bits from almost every comic Steph was in right in front of them.
(OH. oh. You don't like Stephanie. that explains the amount of passion here that was confusing for me, I didn't understand why it seemed you were so invested in refuting this. it's like a moral thing now whether she's poor? or a 'financially-concious middle class white girl" is that why white was bought up despite not being relevant to the current conversation about finances? or something? idk what's going on in fandom anymore. anyway.)
If you ever have the time/interest, would you break down the canon surrounding Stephanie’s economic circumstances/home life? It seems like a lot of people have chosen to take it a specific way so I’d love to see your reasoning
Sure. Thanks for asking, it’s honestly a fun topic.
Y’know it’s funny—I actually happen to own something that I think most people, even most Steph fans, haven’t seen: Steph’s first appearance. Not her Robin first appearance, her Detective Comics first appearance, her actual introduction. I happened to pick them up by accident at a con a few years ago because they’re also some of Tim’s first cover appearances.
Other people might disagree with me on this, but I like to go back to the characters’ origins whenever I can to find the baseline of what they were originally intended to be and try to bring later interpretations in line with that. I like to think of retcons as new revelations, new plot twists in an ongoing story, and not a way to reset aspects of the past just to fit your story. It works especially well for this because Steph’s socio-economic status doesn’t actually change, there’s just kind of a game of telephone that happens across the decades that leads people to misunderstand.
One thing worth noting in these early issues is just how much Steph, a 16-year-old girl, has at her disposal before she ever even glimpses Batman and Robin. Literally the first shot we ever see of the Spoiler is this:
And because I am, in fact, that kind of nerd, I have gone in a couple of times and dug out old era-appropriate electronics magazines to figure out what that piece of equipment would cost you in 1992. Baseline for a parabolic microphone is $600, and that price is for much larger, more delicate pieces of equipment meant to be used for like, outdoor nature shoots, which wouldn’t be able to hear through glass. Steph probably dropped $1,000 on that microphone alone.
Remember also that her costume is homemade—she doesn’t have any other way of getting it. She’s also shown using some pretty elaborate climbing and painting gear, with no indication that they were stolen or borrowed or anything, and you can see that she’s got a pretty well-stocked utility belt there.
Again, for some reason people tend to forget or overlook this but, right up until she demanded Bruce make her Robin, Steph operated as Spoiler with zero Bat support. She got some hand-to-hand training from Cass late in the game and tagged along on some of Tim’s assignments, but was otherwise being actively discouraged from vigilantism for most of her career. She made her own costume, bought her own equipment, and maintained her own motorcycle, all without the financial support of either Batman or her parents.
So right off the bat we know she’s a teenage girl with a not-insignificant amount of personal disposable income, the only hinted source of which is the implication she works a part-time job somewhere—which I don’t think is ever brought up again when she reappears in Robin.
We all know minimum wage went further in 1992 than it does now, but it didn’t go that much further. So it’s reasonable to assume that Steph has access to at least some money from her parents to support her vigilante habit, whether that’s in the form of an allowance, gifts that she carefully manages between Christmas and birthdays, or money that she’s able to just, take from Crystal without her noticing.
But this page is more important to our current interests because it’s also when we see Steph’s neighborhood for the first time. We’re told here that Steph and her mother (who is called Mrs. Agnes Bellinger in this comic, although it’s possible she was using a fake name to visit her ex in prison) live in what is described as “115 South Holden Street, in Manchester.”
Now keep in mind, the Gotham City map can be extremely fluid and tends to change depending on the needs of the story. But there have been attempts to map it, and “Manchester” has never been on any of those maps, so we have to do some extrapolation. At the very least, we can tell the neighborhood is clearly not in the city, given the very deliberate angle there in the first panel to show that they’re well away from the crowded downtown Gotham skyline.
This implies that Manchester is intended to be one of the mainland suburbs that feeds the island city of Gotham, similar to Bristol Township where the Wayne and Drake Manors are located. It’s not nearly as nice a neighborhood as Bristol—note the fenced-in front lawns, the broken shutters on the neighboring houses, and the vaguely racist lawn ornament on the Brown’s property—but it’s also not some rundown slum. People aren’t afraid to let kids play in their front yards or leave their garage doors standing open. And you’ll note those aren’t trailers, either, they’re decently-sized suburban homes.
Also worth noting: Crystal seems to keep this house perfectly fine on her own as a single mother. Arthur doesn’t live with them; when he’s shown having residences it tends to be apartments in the city by himself, and it’s not like he could support them from prison or with his ill-gotten criminal gains. And yet, we don’t see Steph or Crystal worrying at all about bills or mortgages or anything like that throughout any of their appearances. We see the interior of their house on several occasions and, while it’s often messy, it’s not in disrepair or neglect.
This is a constant portrayal throughout all of Steph’s appearances, from Robin through even her run as Batgirl. So, with that in mind, where does the idea that Steph is poor come from? Well, I’ve got a couple of theories.
One is the usual comics fandom problem: canon is huge, nobody can keep up with all of it, and some people go out of their way to be assholes about it, so misinformation gets spread like wildfire, in no small part because Steph is a character that a lot of people use as a self-insert and therefore she must be the misunderstood underdog in all things.
But on the more-interesting-to-talk-about front… I don’t think it’s controversial to say that Steph’s first big storyline was her pregnancy. Yeah? Like, it’s the first story involving her that really started getting critical attention. Whether it deserves that attention is more open to debate—personally, since reading Icon & Rocket for the first time, I’ve come to view it as Dixon pulling the comic book equivalent of white guys repackaging black music and watering it down—but the important thing right now is that it’s the first time people would’ve been specifically reading the Robin comics for Stephanie Brown. And in those comics, Steph’s house is shown as visibly run-down, covered in cracks and disrepair.
Thing is, there’s a context that people miss if you’re reading for the baby storyline and nothing else: this storyline plays out over the last days of “Aftershock” and early months of “No Man’s Land,” the storyline where Gotham is racked by a destructive earthquake that nearly levels the city and is abandoned by the federal government.
Again, we get the reinforced confirmation that Steph’s house isn’t actually in Gotham because it’s not destroyed in the quake—the neighborhood is damaged and briefly evacuated due to a gas line rupture in the immediate aftermath, but once that’s cleared up they’re free to return home, and their suburb is not part of the federal government’s evacuation. Nearly every building in Gotham is shown with similar damage during this time, including Drake Manor.
This storyline also plays into, I think, the stereotypes that people jump on when it comes to Steph’s socioeconomic status. Like I’ve mentioned before: Arthur is a criminal, Crystal is a drug addict, and Steph is a teen mom. Therefore, they must be poor, right? Because good middle class families supposedly don’t have those kinds of problems.
But, as I’ve mentioned before, that’s an inaccurate stereotype that ignores reality: plenty of drug addicts, criminals and teen moms live in the suburbs. And the Browns’ specific circumstances are distinctly atypical of the stereotype—Arthur’s not some down-on-his-luck thief pushed to crime by economic hardship, he’s an arrogant former gameshow host who thinks he’s smarter than everyone else and resents the world for not handing him the success he feels entitled to. Crystal’s not some crack addict, she’s a working nurse who used to get her doctor friends to write her scripts for prescription painkillers. And Steph is just a teenage girl who slept with a boy and got pregnant, with the costs of prenatal care and/or childrearing never seeming to be a factor in her decision to bring the child to term and give it up for adoption.
I could go on but that’s pretty much the long and short of it: Steph is simply not shown as being poor in the comics. Ever. She’s not rich, she does clearly rely on her fists much more than any gadgets or fancy gear and lives with her mother rather than moving out on her own for college, but she’s also never shown worrying about student loans and can apparently pay for all her classes with some government assistance and a part-time job alone.
People just assume that she’s poor because they’re misinformed, or they’re projecting, or they’ve got biases they haven’t examined, or they need her to be an underdog to justify their argument against one of the other characters, or they really want her to be buddy-buds with Jason for some reason.
Or, y’know, they just don’t want to acknowledge that they’re rooting for a middle-class white girl from the suburbs who commutes into the inner city to pick fights for fun.
#stephanie brown#dc comics#there is something weirdly funny about seeing stephanie brown critical tag lmao#imagine if we'd had that like what#fifteen years ago in scans_daily when people argued “that bitch should stay dead” with me#(hashtag stephanie brown critical)
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Three Sisters: The Beacons of Change
Been a minute since I yapped on the internet and I’m bored on a long layover so here we go! A few housekeeping items before we dig in:
This post is pro Nesta, Feyre, and Elain. I love them all.
Some of the discourse involves pro-Elriel ramblings. This post is largely about Elain herself, so I’ll be including her general tag in this post, but wanted to make note of the Elriel discourse in case that isn’t your cuppa.
A huge shoutout to @jasmineandcedar and @nikachansstuff for the inspiration on this post. Their post/comment largely inspired this.
My thoughts are never coherent and all of this is just my opinion. Also I didn't edit this whatsoever lmao.
If any of these things aren’t for you, no worries, but peace out Girl Scout, keep on keeping you're peace. If you're interested and ready to read more then let's get on into it!
One interesting theme I picked up on within the ACOTAR series is change. More specifically, inciting change on not only a personal level, but also on the societal level. And I’m of the mind that each sister is meant to spark some sort of change, both within themselves as they get their healing arc, but also within the greater Prythian society as they come into power.
Let’s start with Feyre darling.
The First High Lady
Before Feyre came to Prythian, before her story, there were no High Ladies. Or at least the history of them were lost to society as we learned in the CC3 series. Females were not welcome to the role of 'High Lady'. They were not equals to the High Lords, even as their mates.
But with Feyre’s rebirth, with her sacrifice as the Curse Breaker, she rose to power in a way that changed fae society. She was the first High Lady. And we can see that this change spread with Viviane becoming the High Lady of Winter.
Feyre, as a monarch, represents ruling power. The power to command. She is the Crown. And with her character arc she brought change to Prythian in that she opened the door for other High Ladies to take their thrones. She challenged the misogynic lens on which Prythian viewed political leaders and proved that women can have their own political power.
The Valkyrie Reborn
Before Nesta, before her being Made, the Valkyries were lost to the world. The systems in place, largely those in Illyria as we saw in the forefront of her novel, believed women couldn’t be warriors. That they were lesser, weaker.
But with Nesta’s healing, and the revival of the Valkyries alongside Emerie and Gwyn, she challenged this. A challenge that was overcome in the Blood Rite.
With Nesta, she proved that women can have physical power. That they can be warriors. She brought about the rebirth of the Valkyries: an all female army. She challenged yet another societal (and misogynistic) standard within Prythian.
The Bondbreaker
Warning: Pro-Elriel content below
Like her sisters, I think Elain Archeron will also challenge an aspect of Prythian society. But the way she changes society and challenges it will be different than that of her sister's. Like Elain's personality, I believe her own defiance will be softer. Rooted in the heart and emotions.
But damn will it be a choice that radiates through the narrative.
As it stands in Prythian, mating bonds are sacred. Holy. They’re something not to be questioned, no matter what. As we learn from Rhys, some mates aren’t even true matches in spirit, but the bond is regarded so highly that females accept it any way, despite what they want for themselves for their lives. For their hearts.
Tamlin's parents and Rhysand's own mother and father are excellent examples of mated pairs who aren't "true pairings of souls". And I'd argue that SJM introduced these pairings to the narrative as a way to hold a mirror up to Elain's own mating bond.
I believe Elain will challenge this societal standard by rejecting her mating bond. Autonomy and freewill is a huge theme with her character and rejecting the bond would be the culmination of this. More of my yapping on this can be found here.
Elain's choice would also be a sign to other females with unwanted bonds that they too have a choice. That the bonds don’t always know best. That perhaps the Cauldron doesn't always know best. Elain’s rejection of the bond would spark change in Prythian, just like her sister’s arcs sparked change.
Note: Yapped a bit about the lore drops in CC3 and the implications of it in my post here. I personally believe there's two forces warring in the Cauldron (the Mother v. the Asteri's corruption) and believe it raises some interesting implications...
The TLDR: Each Sister is a Beacon of Change
Feyre, the monarch, challenged the system surrounding females in positions in power. With her, the role of High Ladies was reborn and the stigma in Prythian surrounding female leaders was fought.
Nesta, the warrior, challenged existing systems surrounding the strength and validity of female warriors. Through her, the Valkyries were reborn.
With Elain, I theorize that she'll lead a quieter rebellion. But one long overdue. She'll challenge the issue of fate, of the Cauldron's eddies and the Mother's will, over the heart. She'll challenge the heart. The bond. And stand in defiance of it.
okkk bye!
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Helloo, I'm wondering if you can do a sh comfort with any character from tfp plz :3
From the ☣️ annon
Went for Starscream because I know his brand of comfort is... questionable but entertaining to write - also (sfw)
You’re in trouble. Big fucking trouble. You can stay in your little lab all you want, fiddling with genetic samples with the grace of a high schooler dissecting a frog, lacking your usual precision. Yes, you got yourself into it. No, your past self refuses to apologize to the current you. And while you may understand what pushed the old you to make this decision a week ago, personal growth isn’t going to do shit after the stunt you’ve pulled. Starscream is your abductor, yes, but he’s also your “guardian” so to speak; the Decepticon responsible for your continued wellbeing. This has not stopped him from threatening your life back when you were being “rescued” from your old job, but there’s no use dwelling on it. The point is, there’s a degree of mutual trust between the two of you. In exchange for a wide variety of resources and access to actual alien technology, you’ve been hard at work handling projects he’s tossed your way. You pride yourself in it, because who wouldn’t after spending decades perfecting their craft? Or getting into a ludicrous amount of student debt… Your stint with the government was, admittedly, your lowest point; MK-Ultra 2.0 type experiments you only agreed to as a morally and financially bankrupt newcomer with a grudge against society as a whole after working half a decade in retail. To say you regret it is to put it lightly. At the very least the Decepticons are honest about their intentions, no “protecting the people” rhetoric; if they’re going to cyberform the Earth then you’ll be there with your bucket of popcorn watching it all unfold. Although, past you wasn’t quite as eager. Guilt racked your brain, tormented you well into the night, reminded you every waking moment you could only be an instrument in someone else’s plan, a pawn that would unquestionably follow its master even if it meant digging its own grave. Yes, you’re doing better now (you think), and you were concealing the secret just fine until you misjudged the boiling point of an experimental concoction and got a face-full of glass. It could have been worse, you had shielded yourself with your arms, earning only a couple scars on your face (and a frightening amount on your arms). That’s when Knock Out came in. Oh Knock Out. You cunt . Of course he was being too kind; it wasn’t from the chunks of glass he was removing with a pair of forceps, nor the tears of pain running down your face (you honestly expected him to go “Ew” and toss a blanket over your head so he wouldn’t have to look). It’s because he had seen the week-old cut along your arm. He didn’t make a fuss, didn’t point it out, didn’t so much as pause while treating you. Oh no – he sent you a message first thing in the morning informing you he relayed the extra detail to Starscream and sent you the Cybertronian equivalent of a shrug emoji. Your first reaction was to threaten his life through text, which he responded to with an eyeroll.
This leaves you here, waiting at your post, counting down the seconds to doomsday, hands shaking cursing yourself for spilling the (thankfully non-corrosive) substance down the beaker. You try to seem casual when the door opens up. You try to steady your breathing when you feel his footsteps. You try to put down the beaker and greet him – which drops and shatters. Staring down at your work, mouth agape, you don’t have the strength to look him in the optic after three major blunders in under 24 hours. Although it’s hard to avoid his gaze when he commands your attention with his presence alone. “Hey,” you say, sweating profusely. “Nice day we’re having. Out here in space, I mean.” His expression is one of exasperated frustration. “Oh don’t patronize me.” He scoops you up like a naughty kitten, glaring daggers at you. “Show me,” he orders. You cradle your arm to your chest. “But, Knock Out bandaged it yesterday-” “Are you trying to waste my time?” You hang your head low and undo the wrappings at a snail’s pace, desperately stalling, praying for anything to intervene and pull Starscream away so you can scramble under your desk and hyperventilate in peace. But your boss doesn’t have time to waste. He groans dramatically before plucking your arm and tearing through the bandages in one clean cut of his talon. “I swear it’s not that bad,” you say, the antithesis of convincing, cringing inside as he observes the scars in eerie silence. The expression he wears is unreadable. His optics drag from your arm to your face. You swallow. “It’s just a scratch-” “No,” he cuts you off, voice bursting with anger. “Do you take me for a fool?” “Wait I didn’t mean it that way-” “Shut up.” He glowers down at you, claws tightening around your arm. “I will remind you, human, that you are an investment . And I won’t have my investments break of their own volition. So tell me,” he drags you closer, sending a sudden burst of pain which you dare not show, “ why would you do it?”
“I… I don’t… I don’t know how to explain,” you whisper. He scoffs and rolls his optics. “Is it so difficult to collaborate? If you won’t tell me, then I can’t help you.” The words ring in your ears. You go weak in the knees. “Help me?” you echo, incredulity heavy on your tongue. He flashes you a look of utter confusion. “What? Did you think I would punish you? Oh, please , it’s not my modus operandi. I have a more refined manner of supervising my subordinates compared to… I’m sure you can guess whom. Now stop wasting my time, and tell me why .”
“Uh… it’s a long story,” you babble, still reeling from his words. “Then shorten it, I don’t have all cycle.”
“I’ve been plagued with some… pretty horrendous thoughts at night, among,” you vaguely gesture at your makeshift lab, “the stress of deadlines.” He contemplates you, arching an optical ridge. It feels… strangely human compared to the apathetic stares of your old bosses. You’re a number here just the same, except it will be significantly more difficult to replace you. “I can’t change the deadlines,” he starts in an oddly soft tone, scrutinizing your reaction. “However, I can procure the proper medication to avoid another incident. .” You flash him a bewildered look. “Antidepressants?” you ask incredulously. “I was referring to something along the lines of ambien or adderall.” He releases your arm and taps his chin. “Perhaps both considering your current state.”
“Oh…” You blink. “I didn’t expect you to know this much about human pharmaceuticals.”
He scoffs again, putting an offended servo to his chassis. “Unlike us, you humans are exceptionally fragile, mentally and physiologically. I had anticipated some manner of a breakdown, although not this severe.” “So am I forgiven?” you ask, a mild attempt at sarcasm to clear the ambiance. It earns you a glare. “No,” he declares unsurprisingly. “I will be confiscating the hazardous materials.” You cock an eyebrow and point at the glass vials behind you, two of which are very obviously missing from the rack (and one whose pieces are mostly dislodged from your arm). He ex-vents loudly, slapping a servo to his face. “I was referring to the sharp instruments in your possession.” His voice is muffled. “Fair enough,” you say. “And B09F will be dispensing your medication.” “A bit excessive. But sure.” He scowls at you between his digits. He seems… terribly overworked. Cybertronians don’t have eyebags, but you swear there are dark lines under his optics. You clear your throat and avoid eye contact. “Thank you. I appreciate it quite a bit. You’re much better than my previous employer.” Said previous employer orchestrate your kidnapping and made you work towards humanity’s downfall with a blaster to your head. This, you leave out completely. He freezes for a split second. Slowly, he removes his servo to contemplate you better. “Odd,” he remarks. “I thought humanity would treat you better as one of their own.” A smile spreads across his face. “No matter. At least someone can appreciate the effort I put into running a tight ship.” You return his smile in spades. “I’m sure I’m not the only one.” “Flattery won’t work on me,” he scoffs. A moment passes by. He opens up an optic like a dog waiting to be pet. “Well?” he urges. “Uh… I’m sure others admire you just as much as I? You’re… the best commander on the ship? You’re the most competent person I know?... You’re a better father than my dad ever was?” His optics snap open. “Are you comparing me to your genetic progenitor?” “To an extent? In the sense that you’re a better mentor and guardian than mine ever was.”
He squints at you. “You humans are terrible towards your own kind. Although I suppose I should accept your compliment.” His wings flick in a show of… begrudging content. “Now, take the rest of the day off.” You beam up at him. “With the condition you’re bound to your quarters.” You look down in disappointment. “Fine, you can roam around the perimeter as long as B09F chaperons you.” “Sure thing dad,” you say in an attempt at humor. He furrows his optical ridge. “If you start calling me "daddy" I'm tossing you out the airlock.”
#transformers x human#transformers x reader#transformers prime#tfp starscream#tfp starscream x reader#starscream x reader#self h@rm
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Affirmations
Warnings: Explicitly Mature Content, 18+, angsty boy, microdosing, sex as therapy, Gentle Dom/subby boy, cunnilingus, felatio, untrotected PiV, (protect yourself out there loves!) established relationship.
Summary: You know all too well the erratic nature of his ego. How he has to hold the soft fragile parts of himself with the equal but opposite hardened bits. Both contribute to his being an incredible actor, but sometimes he just can't balance it all anymore. When it all comes crashing down, you are there. This time, though, you are ready with something a little different.
A/N: So after he finished his recent filming, I remembered how he's talked before about how it can feel like loss for him and triggers abandonment issues sometimes. Then this fic came barreling out. I mean, it's ONE way to get your affirmations in... rewrite that menal script... 😈😉
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“Hey sugar,” you said as he walked in the door. He was earlier than you had expected. You stand to meet him, knowing he's gonna need a hug at the very least. His face is crumbling mask. “Are you ok? I know how hard a film wrapping is for you.”
His shoulders slump slightly, grateful to not have to put on a brave face anymore.
“Yeah, I guess,” he rubs the back of his neck, “I just…I don’t want to let go. It’s just bittersweet.”
You know he’s talking about his character as much as the fleeting community inherent to filming. You’ve been watching him dig deep for the past few months. You gave him space to do so and had been supporting him in countless little ways. But you too, have been preparing for this day.
“Well I'm here for you, for whatever you need, even if you just want to sit quietly," you offer. You know that sometimes he just needs another person near, someone to anchor him a little. Other times, well, he needs more.
He nods to the floor, then looks up with unshed tears in his eyes. He pulls you in for a hug, burying his face in your shoulder.
“I need a cuddle or something,” he sniffs.
“Cry if you need to, I love you no matter what,” a gentle reminder. You gather him in and pull the both of you down on the couch.
All his defenses are swept away in those few words, in the simple act of love. He breaks down, sobbing into your shoulder as he begins to process the full weight of his stress, physical exhaustion and the emotional toll of the past few months.
You stroke his back in circles, whispering words and sounds of encouragement. You are fully present with him as he just lets it out. You are only a little surprised it happened so fast. Normally he needs a while to get to this point. Either it's really bad, or he's actually beginning to count on you.
He sniffs, trying to compose himself, “I don’t know what I’d do without you. You are so patient and gentle with my messy emotions.”
“Did you take your microdose today?” you ask, knowing the mushrooms help him deal with his depression.
“Shit, no… not for like a week,” his eyes widen, “no wonder i feel like this, fuck I’m an idiot!”
“No you are not,” you say firmly, ” go take them now and I’ll draw you a bath." He can be so hard on himself.
“Can it be a bath for us?” his eyebrows raise in query.
“Of course,” you smile. Water is your element, and you love being in it with him.
He comes into the bathroom a few minutes later, a spoon of dried, crushed ‘shrooms covered in honey in his mouth. It doesn’t take much to keep him balanced, just a sub perceptive a few tenths of a gram. But it helps best when he takes it regularly.
You are standing in the oversized tub in the soft candlelight. The room smells of relaxing essential oils like lavender, chamomile and ylang ylang.
His heart swells in appreciation and love for you.
“Wow,” he stops in the doorway, “you look like the birth of Venus, only more gorgeous.”
He places the spoon on the counter absentmindedly.
You smile, blushing. You always feel just a bit self conscious when compliments flow so freely from his angelic face. He is the definition of stunning. Not that it really mattered to you anymore what he looked like. His true beauty is in the way he treated people, treated you, his presence, his unwavering gaze, his genuine interest in people. It all made him even more stunning on the inside. If only he'd treat himself the same way. This is when an idea strikes you.
You sit and beckon with your arms.
“Yes my Goddess,” his clothes puddle on the ground and in seconds he slips with a hiss into the hot water.
You breathe deep as he leans back against you, hoping to trigger a sympathetic down-regulation in his own breathing.
You pour oil into your hands and begin to work on the knots in his neck and shoulders. You try to ponder your idea, but having him between your legs in any fashion, a casual leg tossed over yours on the couch, his hand warming between your knees in the car, is so distracting.
He melts at your touch, surrendering himself little by little.
“MM that feels incredible,” he murmurs after a few minutes.
“YOU are incredible, hunny. I’m so proud of you,” you are trying not to sound like some mock matron but also you know that he needs those words of affirmation.
He shakes his head and huffs out a derisive laugh, “Praising me for just sitting here? Letting you take care of me?”
“No, praising you because you are willing to be truly vulnerable with me, because you give so much to your craft, even though you know it can make you feel this way. Praising you because I love you exactly as you are and how you show up in the world.”
His breath shakes and he wipes at an errant tear, “I don’t deserve you.”
“Well that is bullshit,” you huff matter of fact, “of course you deserve me.”
“You make it sound so simple,” he manages a small watery smile, “like loving someone who is emotionally unavailable and broken isn’t a huge burden.”
“Oh, I must respectfully disagree Sir,” you know this is part of his process and dig down for your patience, “you are quite emotionally available, more so than most. Heck you just sobbed in my arms! And we all feel messy and broken at times.”
“That’s true,” he sighs.
“Loving you is never a burden,” you assure him, “all I need is for you to be yourself. Plus, you take care of me too.”
“I don’t know about that,” he murmurs stubbornly.
“Nonsense, you always go out of your way to make me smile when I’m having a hard day. You always make me feel important to you, even when you are deep into your work.”
“You ARE important to me,” he turns suddenly to face you in the tub. His eyes are serious, as though the mere thought of the implication is offensive.
He pulls you onto his lap, water splashing. “You are my constant, knowing you are here…it... it...”
He buries his head in your chest, arms wrapped around your torso, unable to finish his thought.
“Can I ask you a question?” his voice is tentative, nearly a whisper against your skin.
“Always.”
“Do you ever think that I’m too intense, too dramatic? Not like for work, but in real life?”
Is this what’s been bothering him so much? You wonder.
“No baby” your tone reassuring, ”I think you save that for the cameras.”
“It’s just that sometimes,” he goes on, “ I worry that I’m too needy and sensitive. I don’t want you to get fed up with me, ok? You have to tell me if… if…. Cuz I’m not sure I could do this without you.”
He must have glimpsed some stupid thing online or overheard someone making a stupid comment. He was always listening around people. It’s one of the things that drew people to him, the way he listened.
“I’m not, you’re definitely not, and I’m not going anywhere,” you tilt his chin to look in your eyes, “you are allowed to ask for help when you need it and to accept it when offered. We were put on this planet together for a reason. None of us are supposed to do this alone.”
He heaves a big sigh. After a few breaths, he looks up at you.
“Y’know, when you say things like that, I feel like I can conquer this feeling of not enough. Like maybe I’m not as weak or as broken as I tell myself I am sometimes.”
“Baby, you are neither weak nor broken. You are human. If I could ask anything of you, it’d be that you are just as kind to yourself as you are to others."
“Gods,” he pleads to the ceiling, “me too, but it’s hard to break, hard to not believe it when it’s ME telling myself that I'm not good enough, too sensitive, too needy.”
“Bah,” you guffaw, “fucking tapes babe, tapes in your head, words from someone else that wormed their way into you. Well I’m implanting new tapes.” You mimic pushing an old cassette into his forehead. “These tapes that talk of your kindness, your empathy. Tapes that say how your sensitivity is your superpower and helps you to be the amazing actor that you are. Tapes that proclaim you are enough, just as you are.” You give him a knowing look as he blushes. “You know it’s all true.” You move your legs and straddle his lap water sloshing over the side of the tub. “Do you know why I’m so willing to take care of you like this?”
He shakes his head, heart racing from both your declarations and your intimate positioning in his lap.
“Because I know that if I was having a hard day, you wouldn’t hesitate to do it for me. That’s partnership, that’s love.”
You suspect that the neuroplasticity of the microdose may be starting to take effect. His eyes well up with tears again, this time with a smile.
“You know me so well. Sometimes you are the only thing that makes sense,” he gathers you in his arms, “I love you, so much.”
His pulling of your body rocks your hips into his, pushing the fact that he is indeed nestled between your thighs again to the forefront of your thoughts.
“I love you too, so much,” you run your fingers through his hair, planting kisses on his neck. “I am the luckiest girl in the world.”
He shivers at your touch, at your kisses, his breath catching in his throat.
“I’m sorry hunny, do you need me to stop? I don’t want to push you if you don’t want….”
“No, please don’t stop,” he tightens his grip on your hips, pulling them deeper to him. “Your touch, it isn't just sexual, it’s comforting, it’s home. I love it so much. “
“Oh yeah,” your voice low and sultry, “how much.”
“Let’s uh…let’s get out of this tub,” he says all of a sudden.
You reluctantly climb off him. As you both dry off, you wonder if he caught your offer. At the same time you don’t want to pressure him if he’s worn out.
He climbs into bed, pulls back the covers to his waist, and opens his arms, “Come here, I need to hold you.” Sometimes needs to be skin to skin like this without the sex.
Seeing him naked in bed and not slipping those sheets down further, not mounting him like some kind of thoroughbred? It’s a hard pill to swallow right now. He’s been so focused on work and has hardly been home for more than just to sleep for a month. You found yourself missing the way his body feels on yours, in yours. It’s gonna be hard not to try and cajole him into sex, but this is what partners do for each other.
You snuggle against him, trying to disregard the wetness making your inmost thighs slick.
His arms wrap around you, fingertips trailing over your stomach.
“How much? How’s about I show you just how much,” his voice slides like butter, hot and silky over your ear, “Tell me, how wet are you?” Apparently, he was picking up what you were putting down. His fingers splay out across your belly, holding you tight as he presses his suddenly hard cock against your backside. Who is tempting who now?
The smile that tilts your lips is inevitable.
“You know I can’t help it, everything about you turns me on.” You try to sound apologetic, but just can’t. “It’s ok if you don’t want to do anything about it,” you try desperately to keep your voice nonchalant, convincing precisely no one.
“Turn around,” his voice low with a hint of gravel.
You shrug in mock deference as you turn over in his arms , “I can just take care of it myself.” You are fully aware of how much he likes to see you touch yourself and if that’s all you get out of this evening you are fine with that. But you might also be pushing very specific buttons to get him back between your thighs.
His cock twitches and throbs against you.
“As tempting as that is, maybe I want to be the one that makes you feel good,” his chest rumbles.
A sly smile crosses my face. “I’m supposed to be making you feel good here.” You swing your leg up over him to settle on his upper belly. Your wetness smears in the hollow under his ribs. “I could just do it here, where you can see.”
“You…. “ he breathes out.
You reach down and tantalizingly pull your lips apart. A string of thick, wet juices stretch between them.
“Oh god that is hot,” he says, eyes locked on your glistening flesh. “You know I can’t just… won’t be able to not…”
“Poor baby boy, unable to finish…” your lips curl into a mock pout at the same time you reach back and wrap your hand around his swollen cock, “...his sentences.”
“Oh I can,” he flexes his hips, pressing his cock into your fist. His tongue darts out to lick his beautiful lips. “Let me finish,” he whispers nearly to himself.
“Oh does Baby Boy need Ma’am’s little pussy in his mouth?” You toss out your gentle Dom/sub names to see if he's willing. You know that focusing on someone else can help stop his downward spiral.
“Y-yes, Ma’am, I do,” he blushes deeply, biting his lip and dropping his eyes. Good lord he is so stunningly enticing when he submits like this.
“Would being my good boy make you feel better?” you want to be sure of his consent.
He nods eagerly, and seriously. You see just how much he wants it, wants to be told what to do and just let his mind go with someone he trusts.
You raise an eyebrow at him in mock warning.
“Yes Ma’am,” he quickly says, “I’ll be a good boy.”
“Just a good boy,” you nearly pout in mock disappointment.
“Your good boy,” he can’t say fast enough, “I’m yours Ma’am.”
“Mmm hmm that’s better. I’m going to sit on that gorgeous face now,” you move your body up, knees on either side of his head.
“Can I push my tongue inside you? Taste you? Please?” his face is fully deep pink now, embarrassed at his boldness.
“Of course, baby Boy, of course you can tongue fuck me,” you love how he tries not to be crass, but you practically insist on it. You lower yourself onto him slowly, his tongue out and reaching for your folds, flicking as it comes into contact with your wetness. It sinks in, searching for it’s slot.
“Yes, that’s it, tongue that sweet little hole for Ma’am,” you praise him soothingly. Now is not the time for forcing anything.
He whimpers softly as you finger-comb his hair, the sensation on his sensitive scalp making him feel more submissive. He burrows his face between your thighs and pushes inside you as far as he can, nose pressed up against the apex of your folds.
“Good Boy,” you fist his hair and moan, you just barely keep your hips from pressing into his face. “Keep that up and you’ll earn a reward.” One hand reaches back and lightly brushes his hard shaft.
His moan vibrates your pussy, notching you up just that much more.
“Do you know what others out there would give to ride this beautiful face? Or to suck this pretty cock? How many of them want you to be theirs?” You ask, voice still even and calm.
“No, and I don’t want to, Ma’am,” he mumbles against your wetness ,”I am yours, only yours.”
His hands grip your cheeks, tilting your hips and exposing more of you. He runs his tongue over your tight pucker and up over your labia, over and over in supplication.
“Oh fuck yes,” you moan, “ such a good boy, you’re gonna make Ma’am cum. Is that what you want?”
“Mm, hmmm,” he nods, refusing to use his tongue for anything other than pleasing you. His lips close in sucking kisses on your labia,
One hand in his glorious hair, the other lightly grasping his cock. You give both a squeeze.
The sensations make his whole body shake. He buries his face in your pussy, tongue thrusting inside.
You free his cock and he whines and whimpers, humping his hips upward, desperate for attention.
“Suck on that clit Baby Boy, you gotta make Ma’am cum if you want more.”
With a desperate whine, he latches onto your clit. His hands grip your hips tightly as though nothing mattered more than worshiping your pussy.
The sucking and flicking of his tongue sends waves of pleasure through you. His natural attention to detail and the ardor with which he does it, makes his pussy eating beyond heavenly.
Within minutes you are shaking above him. His fingertips dig into the flesh of your hips, rocking you forcibly back and forth over his face.
“So close baby,” your voice is little more than a panting whine.
“Mmm hmmm” his hum vibrates against your abused bundle of nerves and you are gone. Spine jerking, hips grinding, toes curling. Your head is thrown back and your fingers press against his, trying to weave into his, trying anchor yourself somewhere. But his grip is tight to the round flesh of your cheeks. He laps at you with long licks, prolonging, but not overstimulating.
“Oh good boy, good fucking baby,” you moan as you look down at him. His eyes shine with eagerness, he loves when you praise him, loves being a good boy for you.
You dismount the saddle of his messy face. His smile slides into need as your hand trails down his stomach, stopping a hairsbreadth from his quivering tip.
“Oh darling boy, you more than earned your reward,” you plant the barest of kisses on his wet lips. “How do you want it, my hand or my mouth, sweetness?”
“Y-your mouth, Ma’am, please,” he stutters, little vertical lines of want forming between his eyebrows.
“Tch, Baby Boy, you know how much I love your cock in my mouth,” you mockingly chide, one fingertip lightly petting his little weeping hole, “are you picking it to please me? Or do you actually want it?”
“Yes, no, yes,” his head tries to agree with his words but ends up just drawing scribbles with his chin.
“Well, which is it?”
“Yes please, it’s what I want,” he breathes out.
“And you deserve what you want, don’t you Baby Boy.”
He hesitates, mind balking at feeling worthy of what he wants.
“Don’t you,” you insist, swiping this precum over his head with the pad of your thumb.
“Ok, yes, I deserve it,” he relents.
“Mmmm, yes you do,” you move between his legs, “now reach back, grab the headboard with both hands and keep them there.”
He immediately obeys, forearms popping in lines as he grips. His legs spread wider, giving you room to do your work. He is so eager to have your mouth on him.
His cock, leaking and hard, jumps and jerks in an attempt to get closer to your face.
“You’re gonna give me all your cum, right? Let Ma’am take care of you?” you ask just before your tongue reaches out to lap at his frenulum.
He trembles at your teasing lick, nodding frantically.
“Y- y-yes Ma’am, I- I’ll give you everything,” his breath catches as you take his tip in your mouth, your tongue swirling.
You slide up and down, covering him in your spit. Holding him upright with a light forefinger and thumb, you massage your soft palate with his tip. The deeper you take him, the lower his groans become. His glutes flex and his balls tighten.
You pull off to his whiny protest both in his voice and in the straining of his hips from the bed.
“Who’s an amazing boy?” you ask, rubbing his tip over your lips like so much lipgloss.
“Please Ma’am,” he whines.
You give him the look, the one that says ‘answer the question asked’.
“I-I am, I’m amazing, I’ll be the best boy for you Ma’am, just please,” his need making a beggar out of him.
“Yes you are,” you lower your mouth back down, engulfing him for two more minutes. The uninhibited sounds he makes are music to your ears; groans, huffs, deep shaky oh- hohs.
“And who is going to accept help when he needs it without feeling guilty?” you purr to him.
Your ears are met with a cacophony of his whimpering moans.
“Me, I will, ask help, no guilt,” his words muddle together.
“Good boy,” you lightly rub up and down his shaft, “and who is deserving of my love?”
“Me” his voice is strained with desire, “I deserve your love.” His hips buck into your hand.
“That’s right” you plunge his needy cock into your mouth and he’s back to sounds of pleasure. After five deep bobs of your head you come off with a pop.
“Who’s sensitivity is his superpower?”
“Me, mine, my power” he is panting heavily now, body shuddering with unmet need. “Please Ma’am please let me cum.”
You stop touching him all together. His arms are taut gripping the headboard as he stops from reaching down to jerk himself off.
“Oh Baby Boy,” you softly rebuke, “I will, just keep doing as I say. Now tell me you love yourself and that you are worthy of love and recognition.”
“I- l love myself,” his voice is laced equally with need, desperation and vulnerability, “I am worth loving” a tear escapes down his cheek. “I am worthy of recognition and appreciation.”
He looks down at you, planted between his thighs. His defenses are stipped away and there you are forcing him to say things that he has never allowed himself the luxury of believing.
“Now repeat it as I suck you off,” you lower your mouth to just out of reach, waiting for him to speak.
“I, oh fuck” he moans as you hover over him.
“Let me hear you, or I’ll stop,” you warn.
“I love myself,” he begins, your warm mouth envelopes him, “Oh fuck yeah, I deserve love, your love. I’m worthy of being seen and appreciated. I’m enough.”
Your hand pumps up and down under your mouth, strings of saliva drip onto his balls.
“Oh fuck yes, I’m so fucking worthy,” his words like a floodgate as you work him. “I’m loved, I’m deserving, I’m your good boy, I deserve your love and my cumming, Oh god i’m so worthy and you love me just as I’m enough, I’m enough I’m so fucking enough. Oh god it’s so good. I love you, I love me, I’m gonna cum so fucking hard,”
His hips buck up into your throat. A desperate guttural moan escapes his chest and he spills, thick and hot over your tongue.
You gulp and swallow every drop.
“Keep it up,” you say, your double meaning all too clear as you straddle his hips and sink your dripping pussy over his throbbing cock.
“Oh fuck,” his eyes roll back.
You pull at his hand, pressing his thumb against your clit.
“Say it,” you insist as you start to ride him.
“I’m - I’m enough, I’m worthy” he chokes out each affirmation between gasps of over-stimmed pleasure.
You grind into him, chasing your orgasm.
“I deserve you, your love ohgodohgodohgod I love you, to be fucked like this, pleasured like this, I am worthy, I am loved, I am enough,” his words are mantras, letting his stream of consciousness flow.
“Yes you fucking are,” you moan as you ride, “You glorious, magnificent man.”
“I am worthy, I am loved, I am enough,” he says through gritted teeth. “Worthy, loved, enough, worthy, loved, enough. Oh god I’m gonna cum again.”
Your movements become frantic as you force yourself into the abyss, dragging him with you.
Your hips tuck, your back rounds. His ass raises you, forcing himself deep inside. His words turn into a convulsing mishmash of hard G’s and open vowel sounds. The soundtrack to your own orgasm. Your pussy floods with both your own release and the cum his body is tensing to deliver. You lift and thrust and jerk in mind-wiping pleasure. His hands grip you, pleading for the stillness he can’t voice right now.
Finally, you collapse, sweaty and spent, on top of his heaving chest. His arms lock on to you as you both recover breath and sanity.
“Say,” he swallows, “say it again, please?”
You nuzzle his cheek with your own. “You are more than enough just as you are. You are an amazing human, Austin. Your sensitivity is your superpower. You are worthy of my love, of your own love. You deserve pleasure and joy.” You cup his face, staring into his ocean eyes. “I love you so much and nothing will ever change that.”
His eyes well up with tears, emotion threatening to overwhelm him yet again. “I love you too. You are magic.” He holds you close, the weight he walked in with happily lifted.
#austin butler#austin butler fanfic#austin butler fic#austin butler smut#austin butler x reader#i love my readers
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this thing (the christmussy) appears and you slide down it
mazel tov you're now in an alternate universe.
you go on facebook and you see a post in the group for an app you have. every month there's a new theme announcement, and you see march has just been announced. it's cherry blossom themed; a cherry blossom dress for your avatar, a backdrop of cherry blossom trees for your virtual room. you think it's beautiful and really well-done.
you glance down and see the comments. there are many people upset that the theme isn't purim, with others reassuring them they can still get purim items in the shop and explaining that the app already did purim for the march event two years ago and doesn't want to repeat. but people are still upset, because they'd been saving up their in-game currency to buy purim items. this doesn't totally make sense because the event items don't cost any currency. but it's clear everyone expected a purim event, and that they feel a cherry blossom event would have been more appropriate for april because flowering trees are more of a pesach thing. a couple commenters mention that they don't celebrate purim and so they really appreciate that the team chose an inclusive theme, and that they think the cherry blossom theme is beautiful.
one thread goes something like this:
chana: ah, i was hoping for something more silly and purim-y
maryam: sorry, but not everyone celebrates purim. besides there are actually five different holidays celebrated in march, including purim. even then, not everyone celebrates those holidays. it's not all about one group of people. everyone needs to feel included.
chana: i'm fully aware, thanks. the silly purim is not the same as the religious purim, anyway. hamentashen are not in the torah. i know muslims who celebrate the commercial purim. i'm a jew who has done lots of interfaith work, by the way.
you notice it seems like several of maryam's responses aren't showing up: facebook glitch or were they deleted? or maybe chana is just so worked up she's commenting many times?
chana: in short i was asking for a springtime theme not a full-on megillah reading. you could have sought to understand before jumping to that conclusion. peace.
chana continues in this vein, even accusing maryam of "attacking her," and also makes a weird dig about maryam's islam.
eliana: try not to let this person upset you. you should be allowed to make such a statement without being lectured on religion -- this is not the place for that, or at least it shouldn't be. people are here to encourage and support each other. i also wish it was a silly purim theme. hope you have a great day :)
hadas: i agree. i would love to get a grogger.
rachel: admin! this is stressful.
tamar, the admin, jumps in. she doesn't mention chana's weird comments about maryam's islam, but merely asks for the conversation to stop. it doesn't.
ari: there is a grogger from one of the previous march events! it'll be in the shop all month. my family celebrated purim and mardi gras, so i have an outfit with a grogger and mardi gras beads!
chana: rachel, i'm so sorry.
chana: tamar, thank you and my apologies for my part in this.
zelda: chana, you can still buy jewish purim/wiccan ostara/mardi gras/etc type items in the store :) even a pineapple costume! lmao! your outfit can be as silly as you'd like it to be :)
katie: hi chana! i hear you saying it's disappointing there isn't a silly purim theme, and it's frustrating that anyone would push back on that because it's not religious so there's no way anyone would feel left out. i do just want to gently mention, for a lot of folks who are from other faiths and cultures, silly purim also isn't something that we celebrate. if the app had gone that route, we would of course understand because that is what the majority wants and we respect it, but it's true we would still feel left out. the app isn't obligated to change anything for us, of course, but the fact that they did is very sweet (well -- i'm not sure if inclusion was the intent, but it was the result!)
chana: just checking you've seen this. *includes screenshot of tamar's admin comment*
chana: can i also clarify one final time that i mentioned nothing of religion, nothing about faith, nothing about megillah, esther, or anything. i was simply hoping for a silly theme with funny hats and a cotton candy machine. the first person to mention anything to do with religion was NOT me. my initial comment has been taken wildly out of context and i am deeply upset that this conversation is continuing despite admin asking for it to stop. i'm done.
chana: tamar, i really don't want to leave this group, but this is past unacceptable at this point.
you don't see what happens next because you decide it's time to log off. you close your computer and go outside and touch some grass. you're free.
It's Black Friday and you know what that means: It's Christmas discourse season!
There's a disconnect that comes up every year in these conversations, and I've never seen it illustrated as clearly as in the conversation below.
Context: This is a community group for an app that involves themes and items, and this year's December theme is winter-y but decidedly not Christmassy.
Some people were upset about that, which isn't unexpected, and then this conversation ensued:
What is.... what is going on here? Why is red so upset? Why are they struggling to understand that "cozy" Christmas is still not universal? Does it feel threatening to them?
I mean, maybe green had a bunch of comments and then deleted them or facebook was glitching, but I can't find anything wrong with their initial comment. Is red just annoyed because it's unkind to challenge someone who's just saying they're sad? I don't think that's the only thing though because red doesn't seem to understand either green's or blue's comments and it's a misunderstanding I see every single year.
Also, I don't understand what the issue was with blue, or why that also upset red that much. Is it just because blue ignored the mod's request to close the thread?
Like.... either there's something I'm not getting or there's something red's not getting. I suspect it's red, tbh, because they started talking about how they never mentioned anything about Jesus, the nativity, or religion -- but blue actually addressed that in their comment.
Outside the context of someone getting pushback on just saying they'd wished something different had happened, which I recognize feels shitty, are there ways people like blue and green can phrase things so that it clicks for people like red, or is it a lost cause?
And what am I missing about red's perspective?
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good night laurinia, do you have any canon sexualities for your characters? Other than the more blatant one's like Mark's bisexuality and chloe being ace,, I'm especially curious about joan wadsworth and owen, xoxo ♡
good morning anon!
so, the answer to this is a little complicated simply because of my current feelings around the idea of "canon" and my position as a creator on the internet who has a direct line of communication with my audience. so, sorry for answering such a simply question with a long and winding ramble about the current state of storytelling, but I will get to your actual question.
for a long time, I answered questions over on @thebrightsessions tumblr about anything and everything people wanted to know about when it came to my characters. but as the show grew bigger, people started to take those answers as gospel truth, even when the only evidence of that "canon" was a tumblr post and not the show itself. I want people to do whatever they want with my world and characters and it started to feel as though sharing my thoughts about things was discouraging that or disappointing people in some way.
so now, I mostly keep answering those questions to the atypipals discord. the community there is pretty tight, so they get a lot of my secrets lol, as well as my uncensored thoughts on things because we've all agreed that what I say means absolutely nothing if it's not in the text! (nap of the author, we call it, because thankfully no one wants me dead).
ALL TO SAY, there are some strong assumptions to be made about the characters based on the show, even when their sexualities aren't explicitly stated. when you expand to include the canon novels, there's even more.
but, as far as I can recall, I think the only sexualities that are explicitly stated are (just including voiced characters in the podcast - the novels have a bunch more):
Mark is bisexual
Chloe is asexual (she's also panromantic, but I don't believe I ever use that word, simply mention that she has two exes names Alex, one boy and one girl)
Adam is gay
Sadie is straight
Rose is gay
...I think that's it? no one else claims a label, I don't think, but obviously there are several other characters who have same-sex relationships:
Caleb canonically pretty much is only into Adam
Sam dates both Mark and Mags
It is heavily implied that Oliver has a thing for Mark
It is explicitly stated in the books that Damien is in love with Mark
Frankie is a trans man who dates Caitlin, which I consider a queer relationship given Frankie is a member of the queer community
and then, of course, there are the characters that are never in a romantic relationship in the podcast or are only seen in heterosexual relationships - those sexualities are up to interpretation! that does mean I don't have a straight answer (pun intended) to the characters you asked about, because amongst those three, all we know is that Joan dated Owen and had a thing for Jackson.
I hope that's not too frustrating of an answer!
#lauren answers things#the bright sessions#character stats#<- that was my old tumblr tag on the TBS blog for this kind of thing#and there IS a post about this if you want to go digging#but it's a post about my original notes and I'm not sure if I'd stand by all of them#and obviously *I* have thoughts on the characters who I didn't answer about here#but I will keep those for the discord#also laurinia is cute#idk what inspired that nickname but I love being bestowed nicknames lol#i am SURE i forgot something#bc obviously I know the answers#but I can't remember what is an answer that just I know versus something in the text lol
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we need ao3 for fanart and I am so completely serious. A universal platform not driven by any kind of professionalism or end goal, just for creating. Most important of all it needs to share the incredibly helpful and complex filing system ao3 does. this would be beneficial I think. because I want it.
#No but seriously the way whole accounts full of art can go unseen#for years. and just get buried#because social media is different. social media is Make Make Make Post Post Post#social media is about Outreach. Followers. What Can You Gain#and of course creators should still have that and still have promo spsce#but also csnt we just have an impeccably organized archive?#whenever I search for a show on tumblr or Twitter or Instagram. it just shows me what’s recent and trending#what about thst awesome work from 3 years ago? or whatever#what if I want to filter for AU?#or etc etc. it agonizes me how much work gets lost to anything but aggressive digging
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Wasn’t gonna post this because it’s only semi-UT related, but. I really wanted to lmaooo— here’s my faeu self insert (post-turned-fae!)
Faeu is by @/antlered-prince
#myart#self insert#self indulgence time#the wings were super fun to draw#anyways ignore the doodles alsjjsjsjs#I didnt realize I was going to post this when I drew it and I’m too lazy to edit them out#anyways ummmm can we talk about faeu dream?#maybe it’s because I’m going through a major Dream phase rn but I adore him#he’s so nice but so intimidating OUGH#And a liar to boot…the only one#I want to go in his brain (or the equivalent) and dig around in there until I understand exactly who he is#and then maybe smooch him and help him through a character arc hehehe#also I wanna squish his cheeks when he smiles have you seen his smile?? definit#ly suspicious but incredibly endearing all the same#I’m eating him as we speak#I adore all the other fae skeletons as well ofc!! again - dream is just on my mind atm#especially slightly evil/morally ambiguous dream#anyways I’ll be off! have a wonderful day/night if you see this and even if you don’t :)
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#spheal#i wish i could post circular images on tumblr. because this one is deserving of a fully circular PNG. i could technically just take a#regular square image and then make the edges transparent to make it *effectively* a circle‚ but like… would that appeal?#if that would appeal then i'll do it. i don't think it would be *too* prohibitively hard. i would be willing to make an addendum#with a circular transparent image of spheal staring at the screen if enough of you want it. either way#this guy rolls everywhere and i think tumblr is gonna like that. i feel like this is gonna end up being a well-liked pokémon amongst tumblr#as in. i feel like. it already is. because. of how it is. i just don't know bc spheal isn't like. one of my favorites#it's cute don't get me wrong but it's just not one i think about all the time. it's one that i'll like if prompted but not unprompted#i'm gonna stop before i dig myself into a hole. i beat totk finally. it was very good and i honestly had way way more fun with it than i did#with botw. i have my criticisms obviously. it's not perfect it's not pmd. but it was very good. and now i've moved onto the next game in my#backlog. which is very long but i'm steadily working through it. hopefully i can get it done before i graduate this december and stop having#any time for the rest of my life ever forever to play video games. dreading that day. but uh#until then i will game. and hang out with my friends. and go on tumblr. and do all these things i like to do. until i no longer can#wow this got depressing i'm gonna Stop here. enjoy spheal
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ghost stares at the ceiling, chest heaving in a harsh pant; sweat ice on his clammy flesh and soaked into the sheet he restlessly kicks away.
ears still ringing, his fingertips blindly drift down to trail along his vivisection scar. he half-expects blood to smear in their wake. his own line of solomon, who ordered him split in twain; half of him given to a grieving mother and half left with the grieving to be.
just for both his broken halves to be rejected.
what did it make him that his mother grieved him more than she loved him? that she begged to be relieved of him more adamantly than she begged to receive him? why did his worth spill out with his drawn blood? why was his pain lesser than hers?
his hand flexes, digging into the raised scar like it’ll part beneath his fingertips to plunge into his mangled insides. no one knows the cruelty of reforming the halved; his name, his being, not nearly as important as his body when he was stripped from himself. no one knows the pain of healing and understanding losing pieces of yourself means losing your value along with them.
how many more pieces did he have to lose before he was halved once more? before his very presence incurred grief so strong it was better to be rid of him than cradle his bloodied remains?
did the infant fight himself? did he age always at odds with himself; his halves never truly whole? he hopes he wasn’t, that he was spared the loss of self; the fear that one may be welcomed over the other.
who will he lose when the inevitable comes? when he’s ripped apart again? simon? or ghost? is it better to be cursed with choice just like his mother or live with an aftermath chosen for him? does it matter if in the end, he convinces himself there was nothing of him left to lose?
his head lolls to the side and the wild buck of his chest slows. he watches johnny beside him, his face lax with the rare peace of sleep; his cheek squished against the pillow, his lips pursed as long breaths escape him.
johnny. soap. never torn asunder but two all the same.
he carefully reaches out and ghosts his fingers along the jagged scar on his chin. even in sleep, he presses into his bloodied touch. he’s never fled his half-flesh, never shies away from his gore as it spills unbidden from his cleaved torso. he holds on where his mother let him go; cups his stomach to hold his insides in place and never minds the blood that drips through his fingers.
simon will never let him become his own solomon and cannibalise himself. he will never let him question which half of him has more value; which pieces he can afford to lose before he’s cast aside.
ghost’s soap. simon’s johnny. his.
whole, in any incarnation.
#yall know the story of king solomon?#and the two mothers who claim a baby is theirs so he orders the baby cut in half so they can each have half of him?#well guess what woke me up out of a dead sleep and demanded to be written?#anyway roba showing simon clips of his mum on the news begging for the safe return of her boy#for the government to do something; /anything/ please she just wants her son back#just for ghost to dig himself out of simon's coffin and she can't bear to look at the man he's become#he's cold and afraid and hesitant and angry and in pain and so different from her little boy that it's just too difficult for her#he's a living breathing reminder that her simon didn't come back from the desert#and ghost has to live with the knowledge that his mum couldn't love him through anything#that maybe if he got himself out sooner if he was stronger or smarter or a better soldier... if he hadn't let simon die...#maybe he wouldn't have changed so much that she wouldn't look him in the eye and see a stranger#if you know anything about me by now you know i love the separation of the self and the person they become around others or bc of trauma#whether thats hizashi and present mic or simon and ghost its one of my absolute favourite tropes#and simon knowing hes become someone else and going home expecting to still be loved anyway?#just for this new version of himself to be rejected?#thats the moment he fractures into ghost#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#we’re a team. ghost team#simon ghost riley#ghost cod#john soap mactavish#soap cod#soapghost#ghostsoap#ghoap#ghost call of duty#cod mw2#cod mwii#save post
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A neat little thing that I love from movie 4 (Captured in Her Eyes): in Tropical Land, Conan’s outfit echoing Shinichi’s iconic outfit.
This is The Outfit. Everyone who knows DetCo, Knows It, Remembers It.
And I love how Conan’s outfit has the same colours and casual, cozy feel of it. From the light blue of his shorts, through the yellow-green combo with the blue accent of his top (EVEN THE ORANGE APPEARS ON HIS SKATEBOARD!!!), to his iconic red sneakers!
The movie starts and ends in Tropical Land, and I absolutely adore how you can visually see the connection through his outfit.
#detective conan#meitantei conan#dcmk#名探偵コナン#kudou shinichi#edogawa conan#the detective gremlin#anime#la junk talks#the outfit saga#detco posting#i'm digging myself a hole to stay in and i'm happy about it.#yes i cannot shuT UP I LOVE EARLY MOVIES SO MUCH OK?#i rewatch them a lot THEY ARE MY COMFORT MOVIES#and i'm a tiny bit obsessed with this gremlin#also the fact that tropical land is such a meaningful place#to both ran and shinichi#RAN NOT REMEMBERING ANYONE IN THIS MOVIE UNTIL YOU MENTION SHINICHI AND IT RINGS A BELL IN HER HEAD#SHE DOESN'T REMEMBER SHINICHI BUT HER FEELINGS ARE STILL THERE#SHINICHI IS IMPORTANT TO HIM EVEN WITH AMNESIA. THAT SHE WANTS TO GO TO THE PLACE#THEY LAST WENT TOGETHER#I'M FCKIN FINE!!! I'M NORMAL ABOUT THEM!!!#AND SHINICHI'S WHOLE LIFE CHANGING IN TROPICAL LAND I'M!!!#I'M NOT CRYING!!!#I'M FINE!!!#ok i'm done i'M DONE#also early MOVIES WERE SO GOOD LIKE!!! THE LEVEL OF DETAIL!!!! AND HOW SEAMLESSLY THEY FIT INTO CANON!!!#FCKIN PHENOMENAL!!!#ok now i'M DONE
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you are worth all the struggle and bloody mess
[id in alt text]
#falin touden#marcille donato#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#dungeon meshi spoilers#blood#gore#(actually pom juice but just in case)#awhile back i saw a bunch of posts about how pomegranates are worth the effort and bloodiness of trying to open them#in like a vague poetic romanticizing way.. you know the genre of tumblr post#and thought of how much marcille was willing to do to get falin back#i dunno. not sure how to explain what i was going for here#'what if the red dragon was a huge pomegranate that marcille had to dig falin out of with her bare hands'#..i guess that's basically it actually#fan art#my art#not very accurate pomegranate drawing either but it was more fun to stylize like this and i wanted it to look kinda fleshy#for the red dragon/necromancy/general visceral struggle comparison
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