#and then not even getting either the carrot or the affection

[capricioussun]

Decided to sketch some of those YCH ideas for warm up but they kept getting smaller as I went

Finished the papyri and then went “ok, time to do some sanses!” and stared blankly at the canvas for like six minutes

[vincinnamontoast]

𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚 CAITVI X READER SFW & NSFW HCS 𓈒ㅤׂ 𝜗𝜚

word count: 3.4k

contains: my random unorganized caitvi x reader hcs. lowercase intended, lightly proofread, nsfw towards the end. sorry this took me forever (</3)

❥ caitlyn is so insistent on you and vi quitting your jobs and just being her cute little housewives

❥ caitlyn keeps track of all of your periods, always making sure you have enough snacks and pads/tampons.

❥ all of you get a bit snippy with each other during your periods—because, unfortunately, they’ve synced up. But no matter how catty things get, you’re always there to take care of each other.

❥ vi loves to cook and caitlyn likes to clean up after. they’ll ask you to do little things like cut the carrots while you all yap

❥ caitlyn sleeps pretty early while you and vi stay up running around together. you try to be quiet for her but you and vi have each other cackling every 5 seconds. eventually you both are kicked out of the bedroom and have to continue your giggly shenanigans in the living room

❥ vi is the most physically affectionate, always wrapping an arm around you or caitlyn, pulling you into her lap, or resting her chin on your shoulder. caitlyn shows her affection in subtle ways—brushing your hair out of your face, fixing vi’s collar absentmindedly, always making sure you’re both taken care of.

❥ they both gang up on you when you’re flustered. If you blush, you’re done for.

❥ if you get cold at night, caitlyn will tuck an extra blanket around you, and vi will just throw herself on top of you like a human furnace.

❥ vi insists on braiding caitlyn’s hair but gets distracted halfway through and just leaves it half-done. caitlyn tries to act like she doesn’t care, but she secretly waits for you to fix it.

❥ caitlyn makes vi fancy cocktails and tea, even though she always complains it’s too strong or not strong enough. but vi always drinks it anyway.

❥ vi hates to admit it but she can’t sleep without either of you and a little night light in the corner (my baby girl ugh)

❥ vi tends to leave her boots and gauntlets lying around. you and caitlyn have tripped over them too many times. And unfortunately for you and caitlyn, vi loves her punishments

❥ vi fidgets constantly. If she’s not cracking her knuckles, she’s bouncing her knee or clicking a pen until caitlyn snatches it away.

❥ vi is always teasing you when she realizes something makes you flustered. she will never let it go.

❥ caitlyn tends to overthink everything. vi and you have to stop her from spiraling into a “logical” breakdown over simple things.

❥ caitlyn gets very particular about how things are arranged—her tea set, books, weapons. vi purposely moves things just to annoy her, which leads to you getting onto vi and caitlyn whining/fussing.

❥ caitlyn is secretly a perfectionist. If she cooks for you, she’ll throw out an entire batch if it doesn’t look right, even if it tastes fine.

❥ vi loves to bake and will randomly come back after a couple hours with a bunch of cookies and pastries for you all to share with a big smile on her face

❥ vi and caitlyn tend to stare at you a lot. caitlyn doesn’t do it nearly as much as vi does, but they are both mutually obsessed.

❥ vi is always humming or singing some song softly when she does like literally anything around the house. she loves when you follow her around to hear it (bc yes this bitch can sing.)

❥ they’re both incredibly protective—sometimes to an intense degree. It’s never their intention to be overbearing, but after everything they’ve lost, losing each other would be unbearable. they’re not willing to take that risk.

❥ vi plays with your hair all the time, whether it’s running her fingers through it or twirling a strand absentmindedly.

❥ vi games a lot and begs you to play with her. If you don’t, she’ll insist you and caitlyn are close. caitlyn will be reading or scrolling through her pinterest, while playing with your hair. (she can be on that app forever.) listening to vi yell and rage quit is just a part of your everyday life.

❥ If you or caitlyn are standing next to vi, she’ll always have a hand on you—your waist, your hip, the back of your neck. It’s like a grounding thing for her. physical touch is a big need of hers.

❥ vi struggles with separation anxiety, though she does her best to hide it and refuses to admit it. still, when you or caitlyn are busy or absent, she catches herself fidgeting—twitching her fingers, bouncing her leg, and blinking back tears she doesn’t want to shed.

❥ vi deliberately calls you the most ridiculous pet names just to see your reaction. “hey, sugar lips.” “vi, please.” she’s shameless, fully aware of how cringe she is—and she loves every second of it.

❥ vi is always trying to sneak kisses when you’re distracted.

❥ caitlyn brings you and vi tea in the mornings, adjusting it exactly how you like it.

❥ vi is better at comforting through actions, hugging, cooking, kissing, cleaning, and caitlyn is better with her words. they will give you both but they are better in certain areas in their own ways.

❥ the advice caitlyn gives is always the best, she loves hearing you rant and complain. vi does too, but she spaces out sometimes.

❥ caitlyn writes little notes for you both, usually sweet but sometimes sarcastic. (“vi, if you leave your boots in the hallway one more time…”) she’ll pack you both lunches with cute little sticky notes.

❥ caitlyn gets really quiet when she’s worried, but she’ll hover around you and vi until you ask what’s wrong.

❥ you and vi secretly love getting scolded by caitlyn.

❥ caitlyn likes to have some space after an argument; vi does not. caitlyn needs time to breathe and collect herself—it never takes too long, but vi wants things fixed immediately. she always caves first, apologizing even when it’s not her fault. and every time, it breaks both of your hearts.

❥ caitlyn will brush her fingers over your knuckles or the inside of your wrist absentmindedly, like she’s memorizing the feeling.

❥ vi tends to lean against walls, arms crossed, looking effortlessly cool—but if you or caitlyn walk by, she immediately straightens up like a puppy looking for attention.

❥ caitlyn carries herself with elegance, but when she’s comfortable, she relaxes—crosses her legs lazily, rests her head on your shoulder, lets herself just be.

❥ vi cannot keep her mouth shut or hide her expressions. baby is naturally expressive, so even when she insists she’s not upset, it’s obvious—the way she pouts, puffs her cheeks, and huffs under her breath gives her away every time.

❥ vi will spam call and triple or more text, while caitlyn will call or text twice at most to get your attention. but you can bet your ass you’ll be getting a mini lecture about not picking up her calls. you know something is wrong if you have more than 3 missed calls from her.

❥ they’re both highly observant, picking up on even the smallest details of your mannerisms.

❥ caitlyn has a very subtle smirk when she’s amused, and you and vi live to make it appear.

❥ caitlyn always bites her lip when she’s thinking, while vi taps her fingers against whatever surface is nearby.

❥ vi would absolutely fight anyone who looks at you wrong. caitlyn, meanwhile, will just ruin them socially. a terrifying duo truly.

❥ vi carries you if you’re tired. no hesitation. “c’mon, baby, you’re walking too slow.” she is a bit of a fast walker.

❥ vi would take a punch for you without thinking. caitlyn would make sure you never get into that situation in the first place.

❥ vi lives to make you laugh. she gets so excited to hear you cackle and giggle. and she knows she’s funny asf too.

❥ late nights when caitlyn has work in the morning (vi does too, but she loves staying up), you and vi roll into each other—kissing, giggling, playing games. you beg caitlyn to stay up, but once it hits 11 PM, she struggles to keep her eyes open.

❥ caitlyn sleeps early and wakes up early. vi, on the other hand, stays up late but still manages to wake up early—a leftover habit from prison. but if caitlyn doesn’t get her full eight hours, you can expect her to be moody and pouty all day.

❥ If you have a bad day, caitlyn will make you tea and quietly listen while vi pulls you into her arms and presses little kisses to your hair until you feel better.

❥ vi loves making caitlyn laugh—really laugh. It’s rare, but when it happens, she looks at caitlyn like she just won the lottery.

❥ caitlyn lets vi be reckless only to a point—then she pulls rank. “vi, no.” vi groans but listens.

❥ vi hates dressing up, but if you or caitlyn ask nicely? yeah, she’ll do it. she’ll grumble the whole time, but she’ll do it.

❥ vi walks on the outside of the sidewalk, keeps an arm around your waist in crowds, subtly but firmly making sure you’re safe at all times.

❥ caitlyn is more of a silent protector. she notices things before they become threats, watches your surroundings like a hawk, and is always one step ahead.

❥ vi has a terrible habit of pulling you onto her lap, no matter where you are. she’ll just grab your waist and plop you down.

❥ caitlyn is more likely to respect your privacy, but if you’re heading to the bathroom, expect vi to be right on your tail—watching you pee. deadass.

❥ vi loves hearing you talk about things you’re passionate about. even if she doesn’t understand half of it, she just grins and watches you like you hung the stars.

❥ vi always finds the stupidest excuses to get your attention. “baby, come here.” “what is it?” “…nothing, just missed you.”

❥ vi is obsessed with forehead kisses, especially when she’s feeling soft. It’s her way of saying, I love you without words. melts when you kiss and squish her cheeks.

❥ she lovesss being babied, which you and caitlyn love doing.

❥ If you’re wearing something cute or whatever? vi wolf-whistles and dramatically fans herself. caitlyn groans in the background. “vi, please.” caitlyn comes behind you to kiss below your ear “mmm so beautiful, sweetheart.”

❥ vi sulks when she’s sick and will only take medicine if you or caitlyn give it to her. “I’ll take it if you kiss me after.” caitlyn is the best caregiver when the both of you are sick, you will feel better in no time.

❥ If vi is feeling needy, she’ll flop down on top of you with zero warning. “what are you doing?” “dunno. just love you.” because you will give her attention. she is very puppy.

❥ caitlyn tucks your hair behind your ear so gently it makes your heart ache. she does it every time—even if it wasn’t in your face.

❥ If you fall asleep somewhere uncomfortable, caitlyn will immediately move to fix it. you wake up to a pillow under your head, a blanket over you, and buried in caitlyn’s arms.

❥ caitlyn is very particular about your tea (as well as vi’s. she knows how you both like it). If she makes it, it’s perfect. If vi makes it? caitlyn tastes it, sighs, and subtly replaces it with a better cup. vi will pout about this. It’s inevitable.

❥ caitlyn keeps an eye out for little things you might need. you offhandedly mentioned needing more hair ties? she has extras in her pocket the next day.

❥ caitlyn is secretly so touch-starved. If you initiate affection, she melts. put your arms around her waist? kiss her temple? she gets so soft.

❥ caitlyn fixes vi’s bandages with the most exasperated look, but you can see the tenderness in her hands. “honestly, violet, do you even try to be careful?”

❥ vi leans against caitlyn or you dramatically whenever she’s bored. you both just sigh and let it happen. she gets bored pretty easy.

❥ vi hyperfixates hard—if she wants something, she needs it now. caitlyn, on the other hand, is patient and willing to wait.

❥ they both compete to see who can make you blush more.

❥ the kisses you all share before parting for work, events, or anything else are downright sickening—it takes forever to break free from their hold.

"when will you be home?"

"do we need to pick you up?"

"you have your location on? I asked you not to turn it off."

"please be home before dinner."

•☽────✧˖°˖☆˖°˖✧────☾•

NSFW:

❥ caitlyn and vi are lowkey kinky and into some wild shit—behind closed doors, it’s a whole different story.

❥ vi is a big moaner—whimpering, gasping, completely unashamed. caitlyn, on the other hand, has a softer moan but lets out more groans and grunts.

❥ both of them are very vocal and talkative during sex—whispering, teasing, praising, and never letting a moment go by in silence.

❥ this is so random but vi decides she wants to go zip-lining for her birthday, and the way they both effortlessly slip on, adjust, and tighten their waist harnesses has your legs squeezing together. they notice. grinning at each other before tightening your own harness, vi leans in, voice teasing—"you like that, pretty girl?"

❥ vi is best with her mouth and fingers, but she’s a god with the strap regardless—just a little more reckless, rough, completely lost in it. caitlyn, on the other hand, is all precision, focused on hitting every spot and angle with near-perfect accuracy.

❥ vi gets so into making you squirm. she’ll kiss you deep and then pull away just as you’re chasing after her lips.

❥ caitlyn loves whispering in your ear—low, sultry, making promises that send a shiver down your spine. “you’re being so good for me, love.”

❥ vi lives for praise during sex. tell her how good she’s making you feel, moan her name like it’s the only word you know, and she’ll melt—eyes hazy, lips parted, desperate to hear more. She craves it, thrives on it, and if you whimper out a “just like that, baby” or a breathless “you’re so good to me,” she’ll only go harder, more determined to pull every sound from your lips.

❥ vi has a thing for spit—messy, unrestrained, completely shameless. she loves the way it glistens on your lips after a kiss, the way it drips down your chin when she pulls away just to admire you. and when she presses two fingers against your tongue, eyes dark and teasing, voice thick with want—"c'mon, pretty girl, let me see,"—you don’t even hesitate.

❥ vi is a mess between you both—panting, whining, completely unraveling. caitlyn keeps her steady, fucking into her with slow, precise thrusts, while you cradle her face, kissing her deep, swallowing every gasp and moan. she tries to keep up, tries to kiss you back, but she’s losing herself fast—her body trembling, fingers digging into your waist as she chokes out a desperate, “fuck, baby—” before her words melt into nothing but needy whimpers.

❥ you never stand a chance against them. vi is relentless, all hands and teasing remarks, while caitlyn makes sure you’re completely overwhelmed.

❥ caitlyn and vi love ganging up on you. one whispering filth into your ear while the other makes sure you feel every word.

❥ vi is all passion and need, caitlyn is slow and deliberate.

❥ vi bites. hard. jawline, neck, thighs—she wants to leave marks, wants people to see them and know you’re hers.

❥ vi has a filthy mouth. whispering in your ear, voice low and husky, telling you exactly what she’s going to do to you.

❥ If you’re in public, vi will lean in, press her lips just below your ear, and murmur something filthy—acting completely normal while you try to keep your composure.

❥ caitlyn has a thing for control. she’ll make you wait, make you beg, smirking as she keeps her touch just out of reach. “patience, love. I’ll give you what you need—when I decide you deserve it.”

❥ vi loves whispering dirty things in caitlyn’s ear while she is teasing you—grinning as caitlyn’s composure finally cracks.

❥ If vi is feeling extra possessive, she’ll wrap an arm around your waist, nipping at your neck while caitlyn smirks and watches. “damn, cupcake, she looks so pretty like this, huh?”

❥ the moment vi realizes she actually loves you taking control, she’s gone—gripping your hips, looking up at you with blown pupils, breathing all heavy. scratching at your back and whimpering in your ear. to see her undone is heavenly.

❥ she loves when you grab her by the jaw, forcing her to look at you while you shove your fingers inside her, curling them into her. If you’re feeling mean, you can even whisper, “what’s wrong, vi? thought you were tough?” and watch her whimper.

❥ eye contact is their thing during sex—intense, unwavering, drowning you in it. Vi’s is raw, desperate, like she’s trying to etch the sight of you into her memory, needing to see every reaction. caitlyn’s is calculated, focused, like she’s studying every twitch, every shiver, just to use it against you. It’s so intimate it makes your chest ache, so intimidating it has you squirming, but they don’t let you look away. not for a second.

❥ vi is loud. she groans, pants, grits her teeth like she’s trying to hold back, but the second you really start working her up? she loses it.

❥ If you drag your nails down her abs, tracing every ridge of her muscles, she shudders—grabbing at your thighs, fingers twitching like she doesn’t know whether to fight back or let you have your way.

❥ pull vi’s hair. grab her by the roots, tug her head back, and she moans—not even trying to hide how much she likes it.

❥ she’s obsessed with your confidence. If you lean in, teasing against her lips, voice all sultry, “you’re so desperate, vi,” she growls—trying to flip the script, but her grip is weak, and you’re already pinning her back down.

❥ if you take your time, dragging things out, teasing her just enough to make her beg? she hates it—but she’s also so into it. “please, baby, don’t be mean—need you, fuck.”

❥ caitlyn is a quiet mess when she’s being topped—breath hitching, lips parting, biting her lip like she’s trying to hold back. It’s absolutely gorgeous.

❥ caitlyn has a weak spot for when you talk her through it. “you feel good, cait? you’re so beautiful like this.” her head tilts back, her breath shuddering, and she completely submits.

❥ vi gets so soft when you take your time. kissing her shoulders, whispering her name, telling her how beautiful she is. “fuck, baby, I—” her voice cracks, and you feel her clench around your fingers.

❥ when vi is strapping you, she’ll dip down, lips brushing your ear, voice low and wrecked—"I wish I could feel what it’s like to be inside of you." there’s something desperate in the way she says it, in the way her hips stutter for just a second, like the thought alone is enough to drive her crazy. and then she’s fucking into you harder, chasing the next sound you’ll make, needing to feel you in every way she can.

❥ when vi is topping caitlyn, you can’t help but just watch—completely mesmerized, warmth blooming in your chest at the sight of them tangled together, loving on each other so deeply. It’s something intimate, something raw, and you adore them for it. but then, as if they can feel your gaze, they both turn to look at you—eyes soft, full of something even deeper. caitlyn reaches for you, vi smirks, breathless, and then comes the invitation, low and tender—"come here, baby."

❥ they love you so much, and they love each other just as fiercely. being in a relationship with them is like having a force of nature on your side—wild, protective, and all-consuming in the best way.

a/n: they’re so cat and puppy omg, hope you like <3!

[mixingandmelting]

hey so how do you think the bat boys would deal with a s/o who’s fam owns a horse ranch and the boys arrive at the ranch with s/o and s/o notices one of the paddocks are open and s/o’s like “Oh.… *horse name* got out again. He’ll be back later. He’s my favourite. Can’t wait for you to meet him”. The horse does appear later and gently sneaks up on the boys and steals their hat and playfully gallops away, stops, strikes a pose and whinnies at the boys mockingly and then elegantly trots away or while the couple is hanging outside somewhere, the horse comes running over and slides down the hall of the stables pass The couple and crashes into hay stall of one of the other horses and it’s perfectly fine or the horse broke into the couples guest bedroom late at night and sits by the bed happily, it’s waaay to big for these shenanigans? (Any other funny horse shenanigans you can think of? 😂).

Dick:

Your horse doesn’t like him. 

“Come on, give me back my hat.” He grits out, smile strained as he finally manages to corner him.

What was meant to be a ranch date ends up becoming a battle for your attention. To be honest, the signs were there: your horse being Max named after Maximus from that one Disney movie and how abnormally fast the horse was galloping towards with full intentions to knock him out (you had told him it was probably from enthusiasm but he saw the horse’s eyes and they were anything but friendly). 

The whole time, Max continued to third-wheel where he’d walk right in between the two of you and give him a sneer when you ruffle Max’s and coo at the affection your horse “innocently”  gives you. 

At some point, Dick was able to somehow trick him into getting distracted so he’d get some alone time with you. Only for Max to find you both and ruin the vibe by stealing and running off with the straw hat you’ve given him. 

“Here, I even got you an apple. Heard it’s your favorite-“ Said apple gets kicked out his hand and lands a distance away from him. 

For a moment, it’s dead quiet, the two staring each down. Completely forgetting about a certain person. 

“So, care to tell me who it was that knocked over the buckets during your grand chase finale?” 

It’s then, he and Max turn around and notice the mess that was made which would also explain the hay in your hair. 

Quickly both males point at each other.

 It takes a while for the two to agree to a quasi-truce, you’re threat of not speaking to either of them doing the trick where they grumble and work together to clean everything up. Though, they did get caught when they start splashing water at the other, stopping immediately once you give them a look. 

Jason:

They must’ve been besties in their past life. 

“Pfft, he’s so stupid.” Max snorts in agreement, munching off the carrot in Jason’s hand while Jason takes a sip of his beer. 

Sure, their initial meeting started out rough where he had raised an eyebrow at your horse’s attempts to intimidate him by appearing out of nowhere and constantly sized him up, puffing his chest out with an aggressive snort while stomping his clove onto the ground where it’d leave a deep imprint on it. 

Too bad for Max though, he’s also an asshole. And only an asshole would know how to deal with another asshole. 

The minute you had your back turned, your horse did it again like he expected. But this time, Jason doesn’t hold back. Throwing a ruthless glare at him (not full blown), it's clear who the victor ends up being when Max trots and sticks close to you, glancing back at him every so often. 

Then your neighbor from the ranch next door comes over and gives you a hard time in front of the two of them. All they had to do was share a look to know what the other was thinking before shaking hands and forming their alliance (hoof, hand, same difference).

“Alright, time to go.” Crushing the can in his hand, he stuffs that and the carrot stub into his pocket, ignoring the rage of anger and despair behind him as he gets on the offered back and ride back to your ranch. 

Morning comes and your neighbor comes over, face completely flushed at the prospect that he’s having to ask for your and your family’s help considering your family were the only ones nearby that could. It gains him and Max a suspicious look, you catching both of them with identical smirks while he casually feeds your horse through the kitchen window and Max eating what’s offered without a problem. 

Tim:

Your horse is a menace. 

“Please. I just want my hoodie back.” After chasing him for the past thirty minutes, he starts losing his mind and resorts to begging. 

All he wanted was to spend time with you and embrace one of the places where you’ve grown up. Hell, all the other horses were nice to him, some affectionately nuzzling into his hair while others asked to be fed. 

But this one? Your horse, Max? He was different from the rest. Personality resembling someone he knows though not as sassy and gremlin-like but equally annoying. 

The chance a horse could be stealthier than a human made no sense as he would appear out of nowhere and either flip Tim’s hoodie over his head or start chewing on it. And it was cute until Max wouldn’t stop. 

Now, he realizes it was a mistake to take it off, your horse taking the opportunity to snatch and gallop away with it. As if that wasn’t irritating enough, every time he’s close to getting it back, Max would move it away at last second causing him to have a couple of close calls of his face kissing the dirt. Oh, and that smugness that rolls off the horse. Having the audacity to even pose-! 

“Psst, Tim!” Squinting his eyes a bit, he sees you motioning with your hands behind the horse. Confusion turns into understanding, licking his lip and turning the gears in his head. 

Sensing something’s strange, Max quickly runs away while Tim starts chasing after him again. What happens next will forever stay in his memories and cause him to agonize that he didn't capture the scene where, once he leads your horse into the stables, you jump from your hiding spot and easily onto your horse’s back without a saddle. 

Out of reflex, he catches his hoodie and continues to stare at you star struck with another crush he’s pretty sure can out do all the other crushes he had on you from the other times, lost in thought how he’s dating someone so cool. 

Duke: 

Your horse is cool. Sometimes makes him think that he’s actually a puppy born in the wrong body. Still cool nonetheless.

“Got any sixes?” At the grunt, he groans and draws another card from the deck. 

Unlike with the other horses, he wasn’t sure what to expect when you casually shrugged at the broken padlock and chirped along the lines of how he would come back. But he can most definitely say for sure he wasn’t prepared to get rizzed when, galloping towards the ranch, Max jumped over the fence and skidded into a stop directly in front of you. All with effortless ease and elegance just like those scenes in the movies. 

“Woah…” 

As if noticing Duke’s amazement, he gives him a courtesy glance before going back to nuzzling your hair. It became obvious that it enjoyed the praise he continued giving him, showing off all the stunts he was able to pull. Well, up until he had tried to slide across the stables only to crash into the ridiculously large pile of hay and the other horse that was in front of it.  It was funny how he glared at him for snorting to cover up his laughter, leading to a light banter to go between them two. 

Right now? He’s playing Go-Fish with Max and you. 

“Max is asking if you got any fours.” How you’re able to translate that from horse, he has no clue. Especially when Max had thrown a fit prior about having to show his cards to you. 

“No, Go-Fish.” Letting out a whine, he watches in amazement and a small, healthy dose of fear one hoof reaching out and pulling a card from the deck. 

“Your horse, he isn’t a meta?” 

“Nope. Born and raised here like any other.” 

Welp. It doesn’t change his theory about Max being a puppy when Max randomly starts trotting in circles in an attempt to catch his own tail. 

Damian: 

He loves Max to the point he considers it a crime for you to hide about him all this time. 

“For  an Andalusian breed, he’s raised quite well.” He hasn’t stopped petting him since you had introduced the two, completely mesmerized by the soft and silky, blonde mane. “To think you never told me about him- I can’t believe it.” 

“Well, you never asked!” You roll your eyes at the tongue-click you’re given. “Also, must I remind you, you raise a variety of animals? A cat, two dogs, a cow, a monkey, and a dragon bat!” 

But they aren’t a horse. Your horse to be exact.

It was love at first sight, finding and watching the equus run through the grassfield. So beautifully from nothing holding him back as he makes his laps without leaving the ranch. 

He wasn’t being sarcastic about you raising Max as well, the signs of him being sincerely loved and cared seen in his bright eyes and clean hooves. Don’t even get him started on the coat, sheen and shiny in the light. 

“Can I touch you?” His voice is gentle, keeping a hand in front of Max’s nose after he comes back and decides to join you at the stables. 

He couldn’t help but close his eyes, fearing the potential chance of rejection. Hence, his heart bursting in childish glee when, one tentative sniff later, he feels something nudging into his hand. 

It shouldn’t be a surprise he didn’t hold back, spoiling Max to both his and the other’s heart content with feeding him apples and carrots to the point you had to intervene. 

“First off, Goliath is a friend not a pet! Second, he left me-us, a long time ago.”  

“Doesn’t mean you can simply horse-napp my horse! Were you there when he was born?! No! It was me!” 

The debate continues deep into the night, him trying to convince you to let him take Max home with your horse on the side and giving his best puppy-eyes. Eventually, it leads you and Damian to have an impromptu sleep in the stables as the three of you fall asleep in the hay with Max in the middle and you two on either side of him.

[luveline]

hi jadey would you do something with r peeling an orange for peter even though he’s perfectly capable of doing it for himself but she wants to do acts of service for him ☹️🫶

There are some bad boyfriends out there. Guys who’d rather argue, who won’t walk their girls to the door, who never help with the dishes. There are losers who expect things after they pay for dinner, and never say please. 

Peter Parker is the polar opposite of all those men. Peter Parker gets home from a long day at work and a short shift as his crime-fighting alter ego and makes you a hot chocolate without asking how many marshmallows you want. “Hello,” he says, kissing you behind the ear as he comes around you from behind, the hot chocolate set carefully next to your laptop. “Did you hear me come in, or are you ignoring me?” 

The former, for sure. You beam to yourself and twist in his hold to meet his eyes, brown and wide where they take you in. “Hello!” you say, not shouting, but certainly not whispering either. “I never hear you. You’re a cheater.” 

“You have ears,” he says. 

“And I choose not to use them.” 

“You okay?” He gives your shoulder a concerned rub. When you nod, it turns to a quicker, softer patting. “Okay. I’m gonna make dinner, yeah? I’m starving.” 

He’s strange in that he says ‘starving’ like he’s excited about the feeling. You nod and he nods back, tangible affection in the air between you before he presses his nose to your forehead and leaves. 

You’re just a girl. You finish what you’d been working on as quickly as you can and close your laptop, sipping at the hot chocolate he’d made you with a smirk. Your boyfriend loves you a lot. He’s handsome and tall and smart but he fucking loves you; Peter comes home from a long day hungry and makes you a drink. 

“My love.” You push open the kitchen door. 

“Yeah?” he asks. 

“I can make dinner.” 

“No, that’s fine. I’m making it.” 

“I can do it, Pete,” you say, putting your mug down on the counter. 

“I’m gonna do it,” he says, taking your hands, moving you out of the way of the fridge. His smile is as sugary as his eyes. “You have hot chocolate to drink. Before it’s cold chocolate.” 

“Boo.” You let him win reluctantly. He’s too strong, you argue to yourself smugly, he could totally take you in a fight. There’s never any winning with him. 

Peter turns the oven on and lights the stovetop, a frying pan on the heat, a square of butter melting in the centre. He cuts the veggies swiftly, asking question from over his shoulder. How was your day, babe? Did you eat enough? Did that headache come back? 

You lean on the counter and take a clementine from the fruit bowl. It was fine, you tell him, digging your fingers into the skin. Not much to say. I ate plenty. Headache stayed at home. The sharp citrus smell of torn pith hits the air as you peel the skin from the fruit's flesh. Then you spend a good five minutes taking off the stringy white bits as Peter fries your veggies with some leftover chicken from last night. 

“Here,” you say, breaking the clementine into pieces. 

“Oh, thank you,” he says, taking one from the well of your hand.

He eats it so fast you could argue he doesn’t taste it. 

“It’s for you, Peter,” you say, putting the rest of the clementine on the chopping board next to the carrot tops. “I’ll peel you another one. I know one’s not enough for you.” 

“Au contraire,” he murmurs, grabbing your waist, tugging you in, orange on his breath as you let him take your weight and move in. “You’re the only one for me.” 

“Terrible,” you murmur back. 

Peter’s grinning as he takes your face into his hand. He tips your head back, your heart fluttering just as much as it did the very first time he touched you like this, his eyes lit by a deep, unignorable sweetness for you. “Thank you,” he says. “You’re real nice to me, huh?” 

“Thank you for the hot chocolate.” 

“That wasn’t me. That was just sitting here when I got in.” 

You wrap your arm around his neck to close him in. “Sure it was.” 

“It was!” He kisses the corner of your mouth eagerly. Each word he says after is half smothered by the press of his lips on your cheek and the soft skin just below your eye as you laugh. “Wanna feed me as I stir? I think our dinner’s burning.” 

“If you keep kissing me, then yeah. I’ll peel every orange in that bowl for you.” 

Such a promise spurs another round of soft kisses. 

[mooshs-crack-headcanons]

Disclaimer: Angst. All of it. Long and intense. Be warned. Reader death.

Gender neutral reader.

He didn't want Daisy at first.

Okay, that's a little harsh but he just didn't really consider himself a pet guy - never had a family dog or cat growing up, there was a fish he won at the state fair when he was nine, Sargent Bubbles.... it uh.... didn't make it week. Besides that he wasn't really that all interested. He thought his mother was the same way up until his dad died, she then lived by herself on the other side of state and he felt bad because of his work and constantly being restationed that he couldn't be closer to her and she made it abundantly clear with that Texan stubbornness she would never move out of that home her and Dad worked so hard to get, so he supposed getting animal made sense - but usually when think that you'd think of getting a dog or cat or something... not a damn rabbit.

Which has led him to his current situation.

The caramel colored rabbit chewed quietly on the plastic grass on the floor, ears so long and tall that were practically antennas on the top of her head as she mindlessly ate, completely unaware her owner was cold in the ground as of yesterday.

You and him sat on the twenty year old threadbare lawn chairs that sat in the indoor pin - in what used to be his childhood bedroom - and watched her, she had stopped eating and hopped around your feet. He feels at his face, more emotionally exhausted he's felt since Dad died and he already knows the awaiting conversation on your tongue the past hour.

He looks over to see you crouched over in your chair, holding your hand out patiently to see if the rabbit would take interest which she did but would only stay about a good distance away from your hand - that is until you bribe her. The carrot stick you retrieve buys you her affection immediately as she loudly chews in your hand until the thing is entirely vanished and she proceeds to headbutt your palm in return, either as a show of appreciation or a demand for more he isn't sure but there was one thing he was is that you were absolutely eating it up that being the moment he decides to bite the bullet.

"(Name)," He doesn't even have to say it as you turn to look at him, bunny headbutts still being applied to your hand.

"Flynn," You reply mimicking his serious tone. He sighs, clenching his hands anxiously together and falls back further in the chair too small for him.

"We live in a tiny apartment, when we have to move there's good chance we move into somethin' tinier and so on. You can't really think-"

"Where else would she go? The shelter? I don't think they even take in rabbits. And she's a domesticated rabbit she can't just be released in the wild and we live in Texas." He swallows.

"With assignments I'm gone a lot I wouldn't want to you to be stuck with-" You suddenly reach over to grab at his tense hands, they relax and unlock together to ease into your touch as you turn your full attention on him.

"Your mother was nothing but kind to me and supportive of us even when some of your family didn't, she really loved that bunny so it's the least I can do." He looks away to the floor to Daisy, he feels bad not knowing she held his mother's affection that much... makes him feel worse he didn't talk to her more these last couple years yet you did enough to know... it stirs uneasy in his stomach but he sighs.

"...okay."

He still isn't sure how you two made it work but somehow the two of you made an acceptable living space for Daisy out of the only spare room in your apartment. She was house trained which - and he's a bit shamed to admit - he looked at you completely strangely like you grew an arm out of your head or something when you first told him that she could use a damn litter box, you know like a cat when she was definitely not a cat. But low and behold she used it without second thought, causing him to stand in the doorway in disbelief for a solid two minutes.

She had her pin with her nest and various perches and toys she would play and be content with and would excitedly hop on over every single time you'd open the gate and step in and happily eat out of your hand and eventually lay on your lap every time she would see you. She was like a damn cat.

With him? Not so much.

She'd run and hide every time he'd even step an inch inside the pin. You won her love with food so he tries feeding her in the rare instances she doesn't immediately flee but she eventually does and frantically escapes out of your arms when holding her.

He didn't get it. Was it because he was too big? That he seemed threatening? He tries to always move slow and not make too sudden of movements when around but it always ends up the same. She didn't do this at Mom's house, she would always stay clear of him and he made no effort to really engage with her but... maybe it's because she now knows she has to live with him. Live what she deemed as scary threat. It makes him feel bad. She was the last connection he had of his mom and here he is ruining it not on purpose.

Eventually, two months in, he gives up. Accepts it. He still feels horrible but he leaves you to tend to her, afraid of him even trying would just needless stress the poor thing out.

That is until a couple weeks later.

His last Commanding Officer had just retired and his Squadron had just been assigned a new one, in bed he's reading the record of this new Commander as he likes to do to get feel what to expect going forward. He liked his old Commander, old man considerate and down to earth with a good sense of justice and humanity, he really admired that about him and he likes working with people like that. This new Commander... not so much. The record showed the taste of a selfish spineless bastard that only wanted to get what every assignment done no matter the risk or cost. It put a certain taste in his mouth he's not looking forward to see first hand and its not like he can quit or be reassigned to other Squadron, he's worked with some of those men for years and the trust he has in them he can't just abandon. So he just has to grit his teeth and bare it until Commander Dipshit slips and the next assigned CO comes along.

His eyes feel tired, he sets down the tablet on his nightstand and looks over go see your still missing spot and is about to see if something was wrong to keep you away this long until right at that exact moment you come rushing into the bedroom with wide panic in your eyes.

"It's Daisy!"

She's bleeding with a wide gash in her side and her right foot twisted in a jagged unnatural direction as she lays in a towel on the kitchen table.

"I - I - I don't know how she got out! I looked at the window and - I got her as soon as I could - Flynn-"

He moves without thinking, battlefield experience kicking in as he rushing towards the bathroom medicine cabit to retrieve first aid. He tends to her without question and she lets him, the rabbit having to be in shock as she trembles on the bloody towel on the countertop. She's stitched with a bandage wrapped tight around her stomach and what remained of her foot. What could've possibly got her to snap bone like that? It didn't matter, all that did was him setting it and coming up together with the limited resources he had to make a makeshift cast.

Even with her being treated it was still rough, you couldn't call a vet this late at night so she had to fight through it. Neither of you slept, just watching over her. He was fully expectent she wouldn't survive the night and sat on the couch silently screaming at himself and apologizing to her and his mother over and over again.

But by miracle she pulled through.

The vet said she would be fine, even complimenting the stitchwork towards you - even when you tried correcting her but it didn't really seem to go through because how the hell would a 6'8 man be able to do such fine delicate work? Whatever. The more important thing was Daisy would be okay, she just needed time to heal.

Healing went a lot easier than expected, she though didn't really move around a lot and kept more to herself and when she did move she didn't really hop but more waddled from place to place. But she was calm, she still made her way over to you every time you visited - which now was more frequent than it already was - and would still play and eat out of your hand. But something did change.

She didn't flee when he was around.

While he did give up, he thought especially with her state he would check up on her every now and again, staying outside of the gate to the pin. She didn't run. It was very clear she knew he was there but she didn't run. That's some progress. You noticed it too and were practically over the moon glad but you both took the process slow, until eventually you convince him to sit with you in the pin. Like that day you convinced him to take her in, this time without the shitty lawn chairs... Daisy let you pet and feed her and she ignored him. Until she didn't.

Right in the middle when he was sharing with you feeling this is a lost cause when he tried feeding her a carrot to no success - she bit it. Taking him by surprise. He stares gawked until she keeps eating. More and more until not even a stub was left in his hand. She doesn't headbutt his hand like she does yours, just limbers away when she's done, he looks at that same hand confused. Well he couldn't give up now.

Everyday, even in the mornings right before he has to drive to Base, he'd spend time with her. Feed her out of his hand before he even had his own breakfast with you. She still didn't headbutt him, ate then went back to her own business like knocking her ball around carpet and then he'd still watch her. Every day until finally she did it.

It'd been weeks and finally her stomach bandage could be removed with her side healed when she did it. She headbutts so rough it'd send your hand back just a little bit but it's a sign of affection. He wasn't even thinking about it when she surprised him with it. He looks at her shocked afterwards, she just turned and goes to play with her ball, it's then when he finally got it. He understood.

What it meant to love a pet.

Slowly over time Daisy opened up to him more, showed him as much affection as she does for you - hell he can even pick her up and or she just follows him around on the apartment on her own. Speaking of, with each new assignment that requires a different locale means you have to move from apartment to apartment and state to state like before she entered the picture which she wasn't exactly a fan of at first but luckily each place you were able to find was accommodating for her to comfortably live in which seemed to also click for her to be able to move around as much willingly - it meant new scenery after all.

There hasn't been another incident last the last time and she doesn't attempt to ever go outside by herself again so she doesn't need to be strictly inside the pin where she can responsibly go around the house and hell even sleeps with you both in the bed. The past two years have really convinced him that this rabbit actually might be part cat.

Right now you're back in Texas, back in his childhood city actually, not that far from his childhood home which unfortunately has been sold with a new family moved in so he can visit anymore but he's come to long accept it. Things have been great. Until recently.

"MARS?!" You shout back at him in disbelief.

"It's only for six months until this punishment runs out when Commander War Criminal Shithead is out of his body cast and comes back from Pearl Harbor then I'll be reassigned to other Squadron. For now it's just desk duty and security for a research lab." Which he still hates - but hell not as much as this whole twisted joke of a situation at hand.

"Six months." You repeat, exhausted. Him being gone periods of time wasn't exactly the issue, he's military so it's expected, but usually on average it's for a couple of weeks - the longest being two months from a practically annoying assignment a couple years back - but six months was completely different. Half of an entire year. "It's a stupid question to ask but I can't come with you, can I?"

"...no. It's a private facility, not for the public so only granted personnel." It hurts to say but you look at him understandingly then back at the floor.

"Our anniversary is coming up."

"I know. But I couldn't just..."

"I know. And I'm glad you did."

It was left at that. You helped him pack then made love all night as he was ordered to leave the next morning.

Daisy loudly chews on the carrot stick in his hand as he pets her on the living room floor. No idea what was going on and just contently ate.

"Promise you're going to be good, okay? (Name) doesn't need anymore stress so no more three AM snack pleas." Her ear twitches which bring a dumb little smile on his face. He then eyes her foot, it's been two years so it's healed and no longer in the cast but it still had that unnatural shape to it - but she could walk on it just fine, still no longer able to properly hop as good as she once did but a little bit, she moved slower than most rabbits.

"I'll miss you two." He confesses. "But it's only six months. It'll be over before you both notice I'm gone."

But he knows it's not that simple. You've been more quiet all that morning. With one more petting goodbye he picks Daisy up and carries her to the other room with her pin and sets her down, she had plenty food and water to do her good until you came back home from dropping him off at the launch site. She stays by the gate, sitting on her hind legs to stand before him he gives her one last pat, her headbutting his palm.

"See you later."

You and him didn't have that long to say goodbye, his superiors already barking at him to get on the ship, you only had maybe one or two minutes at most. There was nothing either of you could really say that hasn't already been said, tough out the next six months and all of this will be like a bad dream. He'll be back to you and Daisy in no time. He promises that. To make up for the missed wedding anniversary he even says he'll take you to that fancy restaurant you like, even if it meant he has to squeeze into the suffocating suit that's three sizes too small on him because finding stuff for his height isn't the most easiest of tasks in the world - but for you it's worth it. He kisses you and promises. Only six months. He doesn't actually even voice the actual word goodbye itself because it isn't.

"Only six months. I love you."

When the space ship takes off out the small window he can see your figure in the crowd with the rest of the crews families, growing smaller and smaller until the ship itself was completely out of the atmosphere.

Only six months.

A very boring six months it seems as he sits there at the tiny desk in the even tinier office. It was practically more of a broom closet than a security room, it especially didn't help with his size being so tall he can't even put his knees under the desk and has to slouch over to watch over the camera feeds on the monitors that showed the various differences labs and facility buildings on Phobos. He had to slouch there and stare at screens. Screens that showed basically nothing but walking lab coats. For six months. And he's only on month two.

But he doesn't just look at screens, he sometimes reads the comic books he brought with him which he likes... but he's read all of them in the first week and rereading is fun but... not for six months. He also more importantly has pictures of both you and Daisy which he proudly has on his desk, two months he already misses the both of you to death, even imagines what you could be possibly doing a planet away while he's stuck here sitting in a chair seat too tiny for his ass.

Four months in is when something finally happens with the cameras - as in they stop working completely. It wasn't odd for them to flicker or flash as he's been use to it the last couple of months, chopped it down to something the labs were doing causing interference or something but they would never last that long. No, now they stopped working entirely, nothing but blue static. He reaches over to the call button to report but then... that's stopped working too. That never happeneds. He's rarely used it on his end but it's two-way, meaning he'd usually get calls signaled by the button itself flashing. Now he clicks it does nothing, no light. It wasn't a power outage because the office lights were still on.

He was currently located on a small base on the edge of the moon, a good distance away from the actual labs themselves. The base itself held Squadron of soliders he wasn't technically a part of, being on desk duty and all. After waiting a bit that maybe it'd get settled out like usual he gets the feeling in his gut to go on and get up about to go and see what the sudden trouble is but he's beat to the punch as the office door gets kicked down, armed solider in the doorway.

"Main Hall. Now."

The UAC facilities were being attacked. By who? No one would give him a straight answer. Oh and Deimos was gone, like actually literally gone like the damn other moon missing from the sky. He couldn't even imagine an explanation and more understood why no clear answer on that however because... how could you explain that? How does a whole damn moon just up and disappear?

He stands with a squad who gets their orders to secure each building because whatever attacked had them completely compromised. Everyone was ordered except him, he currently as his position as security clerk and off duty marine he wasn't granted. He was to stay put and communicate off planet if need be. It made him mad but he didn't argue, with whatever situation was at hand and he didn't want another six months away from home for disobeying direct orders. So he stands by and waits, hearing the constant gun fire from miles away as he sits on one of the spare vehicles kneading the wedding ring around his finger for comfort.

Eventually, gun fire stops and for a bit he thinks it's been solved but hours later when no one comes back to base is when the dread hits. He gets up and goes inside to base, in the control room where the outer planet coms are he fiddles with to his horror discovers they've also stopped working.

They had no help. They were isolated.

It's still eerily quiet, no sounds of struggle or war. No - no that couldn't be it. There has to be survivors, there had to. He feels at the pistol at his hip, it was the only weapon he had. But it had to do. He goes back to his small security office and retrieves the only things he wanted - pictures of you and Daisy to go in his wallet... just in case of the worst. He takes that spare vehicle and drives to the nearest building, he sees nothing too out of the ordinary until-

Tossed body parts. Body parts. Tons of them. Like a wild animal had gotten to them. Blood stained the dark dirt in massive splatters. He gets out of the vehicle with his gun drawn and takes a careful step closer to the lab building, nearly jumps when something grabs his ankle. Horror sets in.

"De... de..." It was the same solider that came to his office, torn in half from the waist down with his lower half haphazardly thrown off to the side several feet away from his upper. The man on the ground points to the building. "...demons..."

Demons?

Before he can question it the solider succumbs to death. He takes silent moment to mourn the loss but turns to look over his shoulder.

What the hell was in that building?

It was Hell. Actual Hell. One building to the next to the next where he fought for his life against the mentioned demons and it only got worse and worse the longer it went on. Oh and he found Deimos, which was in actual literal Hell! How'd it get there? How all of this got here? These damn scientists he's been reprimanded to watch over were performing actual experiments revolving something with teleporting and it somehow opened portals to Hell and the whole moon got pull through and demons came out. Of course. He stopped questioning it hours ago for his own sanity. Speaking of he didn't know if it was actually hours, it felt like days and he hasn't gotten to rest once now navigating these strange labyrinthine Hellscapes. His body couldn't afford to be tired. He was hungry, his stomach that was currently exposed thanks to the rip now in his armor growled but he couldn't do anything about it. Just keep moving.

He fought and he fought and fought. Killing demons and what use to be acquaintances, fellow soliders that were somehow turned into these mindless... zombie things. Honoring their sakes he puts them down too. Until finally he killed what he believed to be the creature behind this whole mess, ugly and arachnid in nature and shot fucking lasers at him. But it was dead now. And in the center of the arena looked to be a portal... portal that looked like earth on the other side. It put more fear in him than this entire experience had brought him.

And that fear was more than warranted.

Demons attacked worldwide. Nothing could stop them. He managed to get in contact with a UAC base that shared with him this information, along with the even worse news. There were evacuees only a couple dozen thousands - out of the world's entire population - but that was it. Everyone else was hit in the mass extinction event. Hearing that he could only think one thing.

He had to get home.

He was miles away, no working vehicle, he raced there - faster than he ever had in his life and shooting every demonic creature with his shotgun that entered his sight but he did not stop moving. He hoped - prayed - you had managed to be one of the couple thousand evacuees that managed to get out. His wedding ring heavy on his finger inside his glove, he could feel the metal on him as a reminder each time he shot his gun as blood splattered on his face and he left a trail of corpses behind him as he had only one goal.

Get home.

The city was in reach, your apartment together not that far off. He kept running, running and shooting, every single memory he had with you repeating and flashing in his head.

Until his trips on something. He stops. He could've kept running his way home but something made him stop and look at the ground at what it was.

A detached, unnaturally bent, rabbit's foot.

Not that far from it, strung apart pieces of a mangled body.

That far from that, a pike.

Daisy's head sat on that pike.

He reaches out and places his hand on the head, a stir of denial in him expecting her to headbutt his palm like she usually does. But nothing. She is a cold lifeless corpse. A cruel death. He removes her head from the pike and hold it close to him.

"I'm so sorry. You're with my mom now."

He buries her, the best he can but takes her foot with him, he isn't sure why but he keeps it close in his pocket. A reminder he supposed. Not for luck like the tales say but a reminder.

He walks slowly down the block, his footsteps heavy with each step, he sees the apartment in the distance. His boots crunch on cheap wood of the porch as he makes his way up, he held tight on the railing as he marched if only to keep his sanity as he stared wide eyed at the remains front door - completely broken in half and the screen door completely gone as it's been tossed in the yard. The windows of the apartment were also shattered. Everything he saw already told him the truth but he denies it with each step he takes. Somehow he had hope. He had to. Somehow. Even if only threadbare.

But that thread snaps the moment he steps in the doorway of the destroyed living room. Blood painted the walls.

He found you.

He walks dead on his feet, on autopilot as he kills everything that lands in his line of sight the mere instance he sees it. After all he's alone. Hell on earth and he's determined to make every single of these sick evil bastards regret even being created. Pain. Misery. It's all they cause. He didn't need sleep. He can sleep when he's dead. He's injured, beat up to hell but he couldn't be bothered to give a damn anymore. Kill. Kill. Kill. Make them pay.

Anger. Such deep anger is what keeps him breathing. He's on a pile of corpses as hoards lunge at him, one even grabbing his arm but pure unadulterated anger keeps him alive. Every single one. He had to see the death of every single one. If he runs out of bullets fuck it he might even start trying to rip them apart with his bare hands.

He hates them. Hates them more than he thinks he's ever hated anything in his entire life. Every single one of them has to die. They slaughtered his family. Killed everyone. Millions upon millions of people. Every single of these despicable vile creatures deserve worse than what he's giving them. He spits blood back in their faces and grabs an imp by the back of the head and crams it's jaw open with the barrel of his shotgun down it's throat and watches it's head explode in his hands, bathing himself in further blood. And it still wasn't enough. He could kill them in worse and worse ways and it still wouldn't make up for how he felt. More and more needed to die.

But they were survivors, now fully evacuated into space thanks to his help but they needed a planet to come back home to. And as sole human on earth he's completely willing to do that pest control and to mention kill and stop whatever the source is that directly tying Earth to Hell, closing whatever gate, kill whatever gatekeeper. And he does so with now trusty rocket launcher in hand.

Earth is now saved, the connection severed and the demons eventually dying out from either his bullets or from being entirely cut off from whatever Hellic engery he guessed. Humanity could return and rebuild.

But at what cost?

He was glad, not get him wrong, glad that at least some people were saved but... out of the entire human population there was before now only a couple thousand handful remained. And you weren't one of them. No one he really knew were ones of them. He was now entirely alone.

All he had in the midst of the crowds of survivors returned back to demon free Earth crying in each other's arms was a rabbit's foot, his and your wedding rings, and memories. That's it.

He had no where else to go, it's not like he every wants to enter that apartment ever again but even if he did the UAC doesn't let him. Which he sort of understands, he was a one man army that did save the human race so maybe it's reasonable for him to be placed on a base just in case... things... arise again. Hell could easily come back any day now and it's gotten a good taste of Earth's blood. But still he hates it. Being in another one of these bases makes him sick and makes him see vivid images of the horrors in his mind. But he doesn't fight it. There'd be no point. Where else is he going to go? What? Is he just supposed to forget?

His assumptions are right; they do want him to handle demonic situations when they come up - they're small cases normally, usually due to some kind of scientists meddling (it's always some damn scientist) which enrages him beyond belief but he goes along with it, acting as clean up exterminator when shit goes wrong, because even with how mad he gets that these dumbasses who have seen and survived first hand the initial invasion still want to poke their dumbass noses into Hell his feelings are nowhere near comparable to that anger he hasn't stopped feeling since that day. If it meant he can kill more demons he'll do it no matter the reason. That anger keeping him going the next five years.

He hadn't noticed it or really cared to until it's pointed out to him that he's started talking less, or when he does it's more cold and rougher than it was prior. He keeps more to himself than he did in his life before. He wasn't the most social of guy back then definitely awkward he never really knew what to say in various given situations and being much taller than majority of most people where everyone had to crank their head up to even look at him didn't really help with that but it was you who encouraged him to get out and relax a little, get out of his shell, talk and chill with people, friends. Without you he didn't have that. Without you he saw no point in trying that anymore. The anger still hasn't went away, he doesn't think it ever will. His mother would be disappointed, believing such hatred brings down a person but... his whole life was ruined.

In bed at night he stares up at the ceiling and thinks for hours, countless of possibilities, things he could've changed, done differently, anything he could've done to change it. He doesn't regret beating up Commander Shithead - who is still alive and survived the demonic invasion by the way in such twisted luck - he saved those people he was ordered to kill, innocent civilians that just happened to be in the way at a wrong time... and he doesn't even know if they survived the invasion. For all he knows they could've ended up dead either way, and if he wasn't discharged on Mars he would've been home to protect you and Daisy. Or he thinks maybe if he noticed the teleportation experiments sooner - stop them before any portal to Hell could've opened, not be childish and bored lazily barely looking at the screens and maybe noticed something that could've prevented this whole damn mess! Prevented the deaths of millions!

He still sees you. The first time he saw you and gathered the courage to talk to you, the first time you kissed, taking you to meet his parents, your wedding, taking Daisy home, your shredded corpse that was in too many pieces for him to be able to bury he could only retrieve your ring. Over and over every time he closes his eyes it's all he sees and Daisy's head on that damn pike. It's the source of the anger.

'Super-Hell-PTSD™' is what he diagnosed with, or well in more professional terms but it's what he's ended up calling it. No cure. It's fine. Nothing he can do about it but keep fighting like he always has.

He keeps his wedding ring on his finger even still in combat slaughtering demons, underneath his glove like be always has, yours is on his dogtag inside his armored uniform close to his heart. He's reminded of it every time he moves, as he fights, as a reminder just like the rabbit's foot in his back pocket. He never wants to forget. He will never forget.

After five years he's finally back on Mars, a demonic invasion he's been sent to take care of as always - sick and twisted joke the decided to invade from here of all places, like they did on purpose. But the more he thought of it... killing demons he's already killed that have been revived somehow but more powerful... whatever mastermind behind it this time was doing it on purpose to goad him, knowing he's the only one Earth can send. That's fine. He'll give them exactly what they want and personally put a bullet in its head. As a clear message.

Try him.

It's the same song and dance as always. It has been for past five years since the initial crisis and he's been sent to clean up the pieces yet again. It's once he's back in Hell that maybe for the first time in a long time his mind is clear, Mother of all demons or whatever she had claimed herself dead at his feet.

It's never going to change, is it? Things will never be like they were before. He'll never be who he was before, Flynn died five years ago only an empty husk of vengeance was left in his place. There was no point in going back. He belonged here now. If he stayed here he could keep the rot in from the inside, keep the remainder of humanity he had fought so hard for safe. He'll miss it, his thoughts had been clouded and occupied by nothing but the anger he felt but he did love and appreciate earth, he so glad he managed to safe it and all the wonderful things and people on it. And if he had to sacrifice himself in order to keep that safety? To keep from having more people experience what he went through? So be it.

Thousands of years he fights, either some sort of time dilation or Hell magic keeps him alive and even makes him survive things he shouldn't but maybe it is that anger that's become more than second nature to him that keeps him breathing out of spite. He didn't need sleep. He didn't need food. He needed to fight. He's much stronger than he was back then - hell that might be the complete understatement of millenia - he's long ran out of ammo that he has to either makeshift his own or rip and tear apart demons with his bare hands, or crush their skulls in his fist. He's scouted practically every inch and different realms of Hell but the demon supply never runs dry and a good portion of them now run when they see him. He was their apex predator.

But in all of this he still hasn't forgotten. He hasn't went entirely insane or lost his motive of reason to fight in all of the unfathomable amount of time. His old marine armor is ancient and tattered and rusted at this point but he still has only important belongings to him; in his back pocket was his wallet with two important photos and a bent rabbit's foot. On his finger embedded in his skin was one ring. Rusted chain around his neck with a name he no longer uses but held onto the other ring. He hasn't forgotten you and Daisy once. He thinks about you two and the life you once had every uncountable day.

Even when he's eventually found one random day and captured in a world or universe that very clearly isn't the one he had originally left, taken in, imprisoned and made a weapon walking wake of destruction under their control to continue fighting the forces of Hell. The Night Sentinels do try to take his momentos away but they learn very quick to regret even trying. They can cage and even mind control him but they will never part them from him how deeply important they were to him, how rooted they were to him. The last remnants of his old life. Why he continues to stand and fight.

He will never forget.

[ckret2]

(I said earlier I had a fic excerpt about DEATH LAWYER AXOLOTL, here it is.)

The god hopefully turned to the time giant—

She shook her head, expression flat. "Nope. I'm a civil engineer, not a hostage negotiator."

—and then turned to the Axolotl. "You. You know how to talk to mortals like this triangle that's taken over Dimension Zero, don't you? Isn't he like the omnicidal monsters you represent every day?"

The Axolotl looked nervously at the wormhole into Dimension Zero. He could see blue fire and hear wails of pain on the other side. "Ah," he said.

####

Biologically there was really no such thing as a god, in the same way that botanically there is really no such thing as a vegetable. Tomatoes are fruits; spinach is a leaf; carrots are roots; broccoli is an unfinished flower. The word "vegetable" just indicates the cultural role a plant performs in the kitchen.

The word "god" indicated the cultural role an entity performed in cosmology: a god was anything that exerted enough power that mortals felt driven to worship it.

Different beings so honored with the title "god" handled it in different ways. For the Axolotl's part, he thought it was a useful designation to help with networking, but mostly it was a pain that meant he was put up on a pedestal for doing his job.

The Axolotl was a god of justice. Not the god of justice, but one. He held dominion over an abstract concept; over millions and billions of years, his words and decisions slowly, inexorably altered the idea of "justice" on a multiversal scale. Mercy, retribution, punishment, rehabilitation, equity, equality, fairness, and righteousness were like multicolored clays he could twist, squish, sculpt, and blend at his leisure, permanently altering what those ideas meant to the mortals they affected.

Which was to say: he was a lawyer.

He was also known as a god of rebirth. Which was to say: he specialized in afterlife law. Before going into law he'd only been a psychopomp, but after having to escort too many despairing souls to afterlives he felt were too severe for their sins, he'd decided he wanted a say in where he took his souls. Now he helped clients get their charges reduced so they were eligible for a higher-tier reincarnation, or got their purgatorial sentences reduced, or—on rare occasions—even helped them avoid damnation. (Although he didn't take many damnation cases. He didn't always win—and those ones were too depressing to lose.)

And lately, he'd been developing a reputation.

For the past few centuries, he'd been working on a damnation case. He was defending a supervillain who'd built a weapon that could slice open the fabric of spacetime—a crime against reality—and bisect planets in its wake. He'd died inside the jurisdiction of an afterlife that had legalized eternal damnation. Case law had long since established that the dead had to be sent either to the afterlife system of their native jurisdiction or an alternate afterlife system of their choice in order to be judged, provided that the proper afterlife accepted their transfer request.

But if this villain had been extradited to his home world, the heaviest sentence he could have faced was a thousand years purgatory, with an option for early reincarnation for good behavior after a hundred years. So the jurisdiction he'd died in had summoned up some bureaucratic red tape to dismiss his native afterlife's extradition request, and he'd been sentenced where he'd died. They'd wanted to establish via case law that the dead who had committed crimes against reality could be damned in whichever jurisdiction they happened to die in, and hoped they could get away with it just for lack of anyone protesting the move. After all, everyone involved much preferred that a mortal wicked enough to obliterate multiple populated planets and trillions of lives receive eternal punishment.

Everyone involved except the Axolotl. 

Taking this case hadn't made him many friends. He didn't care; he had his principles. Let an interplanetary supervillain be dragged away to a foreign afterlife just so that he can be forced into damnation, and next it'll be a planetary dictator; let a dictator be dragged away, and next it'll be a murderer; and next it'll be a burglar; and next it'll be a jaywalker that a psychopomp has a personal grudge against. If the Axolotl could establish that even the most undeserving mortal imaginable, a criminal against reality, still deserved the right to be sentenced in the afterlife of his choice, then he could establish that everyone less evil deserved the same right.

If he had anything to say about it, in two or three trillion years he'd see eternal punishment outlawed completely; but untilthen, he was not going to sit idly by and let this flagrant abuse of interdimensional law become the new meaning of justice! He would get that supervillain out of eternal damnation, personally escort him to his native afterlife, and see him reincarnated on his own home world—and mark his words, he would rain so much bureaucratic hell on the judges and psychopomps that had let this abuse of justice take place that no god would dare keep a soul from its rightful afterlife ever again, or he wasn't the Axolotl!

All of which was to say:

Yes, unfortunately. This triangle was like the omnicidal monsters he represented every day.

And so he was appointed hostage negotiator.

####

(And that's why a trillion years later he's the guy helping Bill submit an insanity plea so that he can go to Theraprism rather than get the permadeath penalty.)

[followthebluebell]

Happy new year!!! I hope this year treats you well and that all the cats remain in good health with minimal trips to the vet!!!

For new years, I will refrain from asking about cat butts. Instead, i wanted to get some tips on cat play? I don't know if my cat's temperament is just lazy, but she used to dash around the house way more and any wand toy would have her skidding like the worst F1 racer. Now, she just flops and bats pathetically at it. That, or she watches us drag the toy around so it feels like I'm doing the workout, not her. She's not particularly food motivated either

Is there anything I can do to get her to move more? She's not obese or anything, but figured exercise is still good for her.

Thanks for always filling my feed with gatitos!! It always brightens my day!

Thank you! Roomba has been doing remarkably well lately, so my hope is that she continues to thrive! Which... is pretty good for a cat I swore was dying just a few weeks ago >>;; I guess I got a little panicky over a little bit of pancreatitis.

alright, so any cat who's suddenly lost interest in their usual activities should be seen by a vet, just to eliminate the possibility of some health problem, etc, etc. We all think of arthritis as an old age thing (and it can be), but it can affect cats of all ages, just like people.

Now that that's out of the way, take a look at the toys you've got on offer. Are they all pretty much the same design? It could be that she's just bored of the same thing and could use some variety. Even if all she likes are wand toys, there are a few variations. Like my cats absolutely lose their shit over worm-ona-string. Da Bird toy is pretty popular among my work cats. The only reason i don't have one at home is because Saia destroys them. Quickly.

The Cat Dancer is VERY traditional. I don't think the design has changed in like 40 years and that's because it doesn't need to. It's perfect.

At work, I'm more likely to use a toy like this one, tbh, because it's easier to direct in a smaller space.

For non-wand toys, plastic springs are beloved. Your cat also might appreciate a tunnel to play in, if you've got the room for one. And keeping a few catnip toys lying around can be a hit too; I recommend this toy banana or this toy carrot. They fall into that ideal 'small enough to carry, but also large enough to kick' range that keeps a lot of cats happy.

I know you didn't ask for toy reccs, but variety may be just the thing your cat needs for a little encouragement.

Good luck and happy new year!

[sunderwight]

Thinking about the weird camaraderie that exists between demons but not angels in GO.

Have we ever seen two angels who are actually friends? Or even friendly to one another? We have met angels with a capacity to be friendly in general, but I think the closest we've come to two angels actually getting along would be Gabriel making a point to laugh at Sandalphon's terrible "can't have a war without War" line in S1.

Most scenes between the angels actually seem to have an undercurrent of absolute hostility. Teeth-clenched teamwork. No wonder it took them so long to notice that Aziraphale wasn't on the same page as the rest of them! The rest of them are barely on the same page as one another, either! When Gabriel goes against the majority vote, no one bats an eye at demoting him and wiping his memory. Michael and Uriel immediately begin vying for his job. The only times we've seen angels team up is when they're working together to bully someone else, like when they're trying to intimidate Aziraphale in S1 or going to the aftermath of the bookshop raid in S2.

Saraqael's overall neutrality towards Muriel is the closest we get to two angels in Heaven getting along, and it's more a lack of hostility than any kind of friendliness. At least until Gabriel loses his memories and Muriel shows up to spy on Aziraphale, and Aziraphale decides to be kind to both of them.

Demons, on the other hand, actually seem to form alliances and even friendships among one another. Hastur and Ligur are awful, but Hastur seems genuinely distraught over Ligur's death, not just fearful of suffering the same fate. Shax and Furfur conspire together and even though the 1940's investigation into Crowley's fraternizing doesn't work out for Furfur, it's not due to any double-crossing on Shax's part. Unlike the angels, who stick almost exclusively to making threats until the Metatron decides to try dangling a carrot at the end of the season, demons actually offer rewards to other demons when trying to work together. Beelzebub offers Crowley a promotion if he can bring them Gabriel, Furfur offers to back Shax up politically if she goes for the Duke position opening, and Crowley successfully stalls Hastur in S1 by pretending everything was a test and he's going to be put in charge of a legion as a reward for passing. They're still not great at socializing, but they're significantly ahead of the angels.

Of course, it's a fact that demons are awful to one another (Eric's treatment is really bad, they throw that random demon into holy water just to test it, "it'd be a funny world if demons went around trusting one another", etc) but they still seem more capable of forming friendships than the angels do.

I think that's because Hell cramps and crowds everyone together to try and increase their suffering and hostility, whereas Heaven isolates angels to decrease the odds of questioning or rebellion. Hell's methods are unpleasant, but it still ends up putting demons together, and some of those demons inevitably forge alliances and make friendships. Because as Crowley and Beelzebub demonstrate, demons are still social creatures with the capacity for love and affection, even if it's strongly discouraged and buried under nine million layers of trauma and a cultural mandate against kindness.

Angels are the same, but isolation makes is harder to form connections than overcrowding. Muriel and Jimbriel are both so eager to make friends, but Muriel's spent the past millennia shut in an empty office, and Gabriel has been distanced from his peers both through his position and also through Heaven's culture of fear and surveillance. He only breaks away from it when he finds something that's stronger than "choosing sides" (stronger than the fear of being rejected by Heaven and Falling, in fact strong enough that Falling seems worth it if he gets to be with someone he loves). Both Muriel and Gabriel are only able to start forming connections when they're away from Heaven.

I just think it's interesting that demons, despite being supposedly devoid of love, have an advantage in forming relationships compared to angels. Angels are supposed to love, but have far fewer opportunities to actually do so. Demons aren't supposed to love, but they make connections anyway.

[mxtxfanatic]

A-Yuan and His A-Die

Though not the biological child of Wei Wuxian, Wen Yuan very quickly adapts to the presence of this new caregiver in his life. And this makes total sense since the small child spent every day of his time in the Burial Mounds playing with Wei Wuxian:

On Burial Mound, heading fifty-or-so of the Wen Sect’s cultivators, Wei WuXian planted vegetables, repaired houses, refined corpses, and made new tools. Every day when he was free, he played with the toddler Wen Yuan, son of Wen Qing’s cousin. He either let him hang on trees or buried him in the ground, fooling him that he’d grow faster if he was watered and bathed in sunlight. ... With how long Wen Yuan had been on the mountain for, Wei WuXian felt that they couldn’t lock a child in such a place to play with mud all the time, and so one day, when he was shopping down the mountain, he took him along as well.

—Chapt. 74: Distance, exr

However, the affections go further than that. Wen Yuan internalizes Wei Wuxian as a father figure, so much so that when he gets lost in Yiling, his first instinct is to cry out for his "A-Die:"

Wen Yuan didn’t know what the people were talking about. When children were scared, they always called out to those they were close to. And so, sobbing, he called, “Dad! Dad...”

And we know that the "A-Die" in question is Wei Wuxian, because the moment Wen Yuan hears Wei Wuxian's voice in the crowd, he immediately goes to him.

Wei WuXian himself didn’t know why either, but he averted his gaze quickly. Hearing his voice, though, Wen Yuan got up at once. Dragging two long, flowing trails of tears behind him, he hung onto Wei Wuxian’s leg again.

Wei Wuxian even lightly teases the boy about this "new" address, as Wen Yuan only calls Wei Wuxian "Xian-gege" to his face:

Wei WuXian really had to be ridiculous. He could have fun just by teasing a child, putting the butterfly on his own head, “I’m not gonna. You even called him dad. What do you call me? You’ve only called me brother, an entire generation shorter than him!” Wen Yuan jumped, “I didn’t call him dad!”

—Chapt. 75: Distance, exr

But despite the tragically short time the two had together, these memories are so dear and formative to Wen Yuan that the mere sight of Chenqing is able to restore Lan Sizhui's memories years later:

Lan SiZhui puffed up his chest and drew in a deep breath. He began, “Claimed he had top-notch cooking skills, yet made dishes that were pungent both to the eye and to the stomach.” Wei WuXian, “Huh???” Lan SiZhui added, “Buried me in a field of carrots, saying I would grow taller quickly with water and sunlight, and maybe a few more children would sprout and play with me.” Wei WuXian, “...” Lan SiZhui continued, “Promised to treat HanGuang-Jun to a meal but ran off before paying, leaving HanGuang-Jun to pay again.” Wei WuXian widened his eyes. He almost couldn’t steady himself on the donkey’s back. He stammered, “You... You...” Lan SiZhui’s eyes were glued to Wei WuXian and Lan WangJi, “Maybe because I was too young, I cannot remember most of the things from back then. But, I am sure that... my surname used to be Wen.”

...

With another thought, [Wei Wuxian] asked, “Speaking of it, How did you remember, SiZhui?” Lan SiZhui, “I do not understand either. Something just felt really familiar when I saw Chenqing.” As expected, it was Chenqing. Wei WuXian, “Oh, of course it’d feel familiar. You loved eating Chenqing back then. You always drooled on it and made it so that I couldn’t play it.”

—Chapt. 111: Wangxian, exr

Truly the father-son pair we deserve.

[thefandomdirtymind]

Casual

18 +

OPLA - Vinsmoke Sanji

Part 2

Sanji series : SFW Shiny Offering NSFW The Small Favor - SFW The Mermaid Dream - SFW The Magic of a Kiss

A/N IMPORTANT: I didn't know exactly why but I wanted to write that fun and casual conversation between Sanji and reader remembering their sexy time. But I had to put a little bit of difficulties in it and I hope you will like it. I think to do a second part but I'm not sure yet...

Warning : Mention of a lot of sexual stuff : Oral Man ! and Female ! giving receiving, small bondage, penetration, bruises.

* English is not my first language, I tried really hard to correct myself but, I hope you will excuse me if some mistakes are still there.  

---

The golden light of the sunrise was reflecting in the calm water when Sanji put his feet in the restaurant. Redressing his freshly knotted tie, entering the kitchen like if he wasn’t fifteen minutes late, he suddenly stops on his track. At the instant he saw you, he knew he was screwed. 

Not that you looked at him directly, way too busy with the prep for the approaching brunch, neither that you seem mad ,even if your chopped carrots should've been smaller. In fact, he clearly recalled that when he had left your bed this morning, kissing your lips one last time, your naked form reaching for his warmth. You looked quite satisfied and relaxed. 

It was not either a sudden burst of love who struck him, even if he always had affection for you, that night was from the start nothing but casual sex. 

No, the reason he knew he was himself in deep shit wasn’t either because as he watched you, he could remember every inch of your skin he had feverishly kissed and bite. The problem is if Zeff discovers it. After all, even being his sous chef and prodigy couldn’t help him with the fact that he had fucked all night long his mentor daughter. 

" Don’t stay there like if the kitchen was on fire, little eggplant, put on your uniform and start helping " The man himself ordered, busy in his own corner.

Turning your gaze of your carrot to observe Sanji, you smiled. 

" Good morning Sanji " You said, your tone letting know nothing of your previous meeting in the dark. 

" Good Morning Y/N " He replied, as he put on his white jacket, a thin smile you didn’t quite know, of his lips.

" Did you sleep well, you seem a little bit…tired" You sweetly replied, returning to your carrots. 

" Yeah I had a short night…" He confessed, watching you, a warning in his eyes. 

" If you would stick to the menu, you wouldn’t be up all night thinking about some recipe I won’t allow in the restaurant and sleep like everybody else. " Zeff declared, lifting the heavy potato sack. 

" If we didn’t serve the same stuff everyday that restaurant would be less shitty " The blond retorted, starting to peel the vegetables, his anxiety slowly melting as he returned to his usual fight with the old man.  

— 

It seemed an eternity before you could remove your cooking clothes. Due to the celebration yesterday, many cooks were sick, making your father and the other employers double their shift. Like if you needed it, with the little sleep Sanji and you had. But, as you return to the empty kitchen, already dreaming of the softness of your bed, you notice the blond chef still busy chopping mushrooms.

" What are you doing ? " You couldn’t help yourself to ask, curious as to why he hadn’t headed to his bed for a well deserved night of sleep. " You should go to bed I’m pretty sure those mushroom will still be there tomorrow "

" Well, I kind of have a hard time trying to get out of my head the idea of your dad discovering what I have done to you" He replied unamused, stress and guilt clearly eating him from the inside. " You see I have a sentimental attache to most of my limbs and other parts" 

" Sanji, I would never tell him, we have been super discret and if I recall it clearly you aren’t alone in this. I had pretty vivid memories of sucking your dick until you begged me in french to stop " You teased, sitting on the counter. 

" Like if you hadn't melted at the minute I put my mouth on you" He mocked, this time his tone almost like his usual confident self. As he abandoned his task to face you. " And I really had to remind you that cute gasp you did when I push my finger on that sweet spot you never reach yourself " 

" It’s true it was a great discover, that you proudly celebrate " You conceded showing the hickeys on your clavicle "Maybe you didn’t gasped, but, I heard you a lot moaning and groaning, particularly when I was on top" 

" I have no excuse, your vision was magnificent and the feeling was incredible ." He replied " But I still regret the death of my tie " 

" It was for a great cause, that orgasm was one of the best I had. It’s a good thing your hand had muffled my scream because I was pretty sure I would have awake all the ship" You laugh, gladly remembering being hang by the hand to the wooden bedpost as Sanji was supported your leg around his hips thrusting in you as his life depended of it. Lucky for both of you, your bedroom was at the far end of the bedrooms corridor with no express neighbor.“ I will buy you a new one since I broke it. Even if it’s, you, who had bring it in bed "

" No need, I have many that look similar. Nobody will notice. But I will have to be careful to not be seen topless for a while. I'm glad your nails are short for cooking, my back looks like I had a fight with a cat over a fish. "

" It’s your fault, my leg was already shaking and you didn’t stop, I was on the edge of passing out ! "You protest laughing. " You deserve the scratch for making me lose my mind." 

" It’s an honor I accept gladly “ He proudly said, joining you in your laugh. " I admit that my own orgasm was way better than usual, I remember you moaning quietly in my ear even if I’m not quite sure what you said." 

" Sanji, at this point I’m pretty sure I could’ve whispered to you the recipe of an Apple Pie and you would have come. You were so close, trying to keep your control, I still have a faint bruise of your hand on my hip." 

" Isn't it when I eat you out during round two that I left that mark ? I had to keep you in place pretty hard, you were rolling your hips and didn’t want to stop moving "He recalls, a huge grin now on his face. " I still can heard you - Please Sanji don’t stop, don’t stop " 

"Ha ha ha " You rolled your eyes, still smiling at the memories." Sanji, I think we both really need to sleep, but I had to know...are we okay ? I will not talk to my dad about it, you will not too and we will live with that happy memories without a problem. We are just two friend and coworker who’s during the anniversary of their restaurant decide to casually fucked. Right ? " 

" Yes, exactly," He confirmed, cleaning his area. 

" Perfect, good night Sanji " You said, kissing his cheeks before jumping off the counter and exiting the kitchen. 

" Good night Y/N " The blond replied, watching you go.

Now he knew  he was totally screwed. Even though he hadn't truly lied, he was now reassured that your father will never know. He knew that he wasn’t clearly okay with this casual arrangement anymore. He knew at first that it wasn’t the idea of the century but after that night and the sweet way you look at him, always caring for him when nobody seem to, he couldn’t hide the issue anymore, he was slowly falling for you and he already know it, it's will hurt like hell.  

---

Part two ?

[justabrick]

I got random inspiration to headcanon dump about Khamsin and I'm making it everyone else's problem. Particularly on how and why he's disliked among other Winds of Destruction and what contributes to it.

So, what wiki says about the guy:

"A former Marine who first served active duty during the Gulf War, he was once a loyal soldier who greatly contributed to the success of Operation Desert Sabre, but his lack of flexibility and disastrous personality caused internal troubles within his own team, ultimately leading to his discharge during the Iraq War.

Khamsin became a private military contractor afterward and used the majority of his income to turn himself into a cyborg."

So he has one thing that very clearly separates him from other Winds: it's directly stated that he used his own money to convert to a cyborg body fully willingly without prior injuries making it necessary. Unlike him, Monsoon and Sundowner converted out of necessity because they were thoroughly disabled otherwise. And that difference shows: Khamsin's upper body is in a different style than any of the Desperado soldiers, be it the Winds or basic soldiers.

All of them got variations of this dark brownish gray going on for them, meanwhile Khamsin's is this noticeably lighter, golden olive shade that I don't recall on any other cyborg in the game

I can't pin down exactly what it is besides the color, but the style just feels different. And it also clashes noticeably with the black and red color scheme of the mech, so I'm speculating that he isn't in debt for his body at all because he owns it and had it prior to joining Desperado, meanwhile the big mech is Desperado property that he can swap in and out of (meaning he has a spare ass, somewhere).

Also, his skin is definitely artificial, because of the seams, but he went out of his way to get a replica of his battle scars on the fake skin as well. It's quite in line with the arrogant attitude he'd shown in the brief scenes he had for himself.

Alright, that context out of the way, onto the actual issue of his "disastrous personality and inflexibility".

It's my personal interpretation, but I think Khamsin isn't an asshole on purpose, but it's a side effect of a specific brand of socially awkward that results in him just coming off as, well... He isn't trying to be a cunt, he just naturally had very few skill points allotted for the social stat, which resulted in strained relationships with people around him. And since it was a pattern for a long, long while it could have resulted in a "me against the world" attitude where Khamsin deems everybody else as the asshole rather than aknowledging that he is the issue.

That said, he was definitely a skilled fighter. HAS to have been and outstanding one to be able to afford his own cybernetics, and not the standard chassis either, but the expensive stuff that let him retain his original face. Dude got DOUGH. So, he has ample reasons to be proud of himself and grow arrogant, mix it with resentment towards others for not meshing with his innate confrontational personality and you get a man that is just a joy to be around.

Despite this I can't say he didn't desire belonging. I have to wonder how much being kicked out of the Navy affected him, it was likely a scarring event because even after switching to merc work he didn't abandon his loyalty to the idea of bringing freedom 🦅the American way🇺🇸 and his whole song is about being part of some whole. That whole being the Winds of Destruction unit (I AM A WIND OF DESTRUCTION sure buddy).

So that's how I see it: he wants recognition, he wants belonging and when he doesn't get it, he doesn't look inwards and instead grows outwardly unpleasant in retaliation.

I don't believe he was a true Wind of Destruction, because if he was, Kev would mention that there are four commanders in Desperado rather than just three. So he was most likely a step below them and if that's the case, then the WoD is like a carrot being dangled in front of him: status, recognition, ability to command others and prove that he's the cream of the crop. But being a leader with a personality like that? Haaaa

The others would stall his attempts to become part of the unit and he'd grow resentful. And he does actually have ammunition for some really nasty remarks, such as about how the others are indebted to their employer and he isn't, the only one actually free. How he's the one who worked for his body and they didn't. How he didn't lose his body to an IED accident, unlike Sundowner, such and such. "Pick me" attitude if you will. If he did have contact with Armstrong, then this is a very apt comparison.

There's also possibility that he's a contractor rather than full time just like Sam and if that's the case, he'd get to live after Tecumseh because he's technically not responsible for the plan. I suppose being the only actual idealist in Desperado it's feasible that Armstrong would want him to live?

I see why Mistral would want to take him down with them tbh.

Anyway

I don't know what came over me, headcanon dump over

[adobe-outdesign]

Could i ask for a review of the snow paintbrush? Its like the less popular cousin of the christmas brush lol

Snow, as a colour, is a pretty fun concept—making Neopets into snowmen as kind of a non-demoninational wintery Christmas counterpart. However, I do think the colour suffers a little bit from sometimes being bland. There's only so much you can do with a Neopet made of snow; most of them are just white pets with coal eyes and, if you're lucky, some small additions like leaves, twigs, carrots, scarves, etc. I do like the snow texturing and colored lineart, and it's not bad or overly bland compared to a lot of early colours, but it rarely stands out that much, either.

When it comes to customization, snow fared okay. Most snow pets did not have unique poses or body types, so the conversion didn't affect things too much. However, the biggest issue is that a lot of older snow pets were "lumpy" in nature, actually looking a bit like they were sculpted out of snow—see the Pteri above, which suddenly gained things like feathers and claws after conversion. Nostalgic pet styles were released recently for some species at least, so there's a good variety of options if the customizable version doesn't look quite right.

Favorite Colours:

Korbat: The snow Korbat manages to have everything a snow pet could want: good color balancing, nice integration of additional objects, excellent snow texturing, and lots going on so it doesn't feel plain or empty. The holly leaves are integrated perfectly into the ears and tail, and form a nice four-point palette with the white snow, brown sticks and red holly berries. My only nitpick is that I wish the holly was a wearable, just because it leans more towards Christmas than most snow pets and it would be nice if that aspect was optional seeing as we already have a Christmas colour.

Yurble: Similar to the snow Korbat, the snow Yurble has really good color balancing and nice integration of natural elements like the leaf mane. The coal eyes, nose, and claws help to add contrast and balance with the oranges and browns of the leaves. Both versions are good; I think I like the overall look of the customizable version a bit more, but the styled version gets points for being just a little cuter.

Buzz: This one's not anything too crazy, but I really like how the sticks are used in place of wings and even the cerci at the end of the tail, and how the leaves on the sticks are then used for the spines. It's a little dull in terms of colors, but the concept makes up for it. Only issue is that the coal eyes could be slightly more lumpy, as they mostly just look black here.

BONUS: The snow Kiko isn't anything special—the hair looks out of place and it's weird to have the regular bandage slapped on there instead of having it be sculpted in. However, the styled version is super cute for some reason, not only having a twig hair but super tiny arms, large coal pupils, and a little smile that make it much more appealing than it has a right to be. It was also one of the few pre-customization snow pets with a unique pose.

Least Favorite Species:

Jubjub: The worst a snow pet can be is bland, and that's the snow Jubjub—it's not terrible, it's just boring. However, it takes this spot above all the other boring snow pets because there was an obvious missed opportunity to have it just straight-up be a snowball. Plus the fur on the converted version is way too detailed and the styled version has a really weird expression that makes it look like it's about to start crying snowflakes.

[sparkly-sediment]

are u have any speesbullet headcanin please?

yes kitten I sure do

Tf2 speedingbullet headcanons

Scout has the biggest, lumpiest, most unfathomably school girl crush you’ve ever see

Brother is skipping to and fro the camper

He acts all cool. Suave. Big dick, if you will. But deep down he is just a fast little boy running in circles on a treadmill. The proverbial carrot to his stick is Sniper

Scout thinks Sniper is like 40 for at least 18 months and only allows himself to realize his desire after

“well like since you’re 50 or whatever”

“?? mate I’m 27” and then the floodgates open

Sniper enjoys watching Scout dart around the battlefield from his sniper’s nest. At first it’s funny, like an ant writhing on the pavement, but then the ant gets cute. And then hot

Sniper would never spy on someone from above to jack off but he does think about it once. But like, cmon man he wouldn’t *really* do it

Not unless Scout brings it up first

They hang out a lot. So much so the team thinks they are legitimate friends- which they are!- but in all the time they spend together they started to open up and all that

Suddenly Sniper is invite to Christmas in Boston and Scout’s mom is ENTHRALLED with this! Sniper gets a shake down tho

Scout craves validation, especially from men (thanks for that spy), and it creates this crossroads for Sniper

Snipes can either acknowledge his issues with affection and vulnerability and you know, actually work to better himself, or he could simply Not and let the little romance crumble

He finds out Scout doesn’t know what a kangaroo is and starts reading self help books

Scout flirts obnoxiously but the second Sniper even makes eye contact it’s over. Neither of them can handle rizz but at least Sniper can keep functioning

He will tip his hat to cover his face on occasion. Scout sees this as an ultimate victory

They date for five months hefore they realize they’re dating and have a conversation that really didn’t need to be so scary

Intimacy is uncharted waters in the beginning! They’ve both slept with people, but nothing quite as electric as this, so they start a bit slow

Does not last long Scout thinks Sniper is SO HOT and Sniper looks at Scout and feels his stomach flip

Play fighting and then they legit start brawling then they make out and then ❤️

[adreamingofguns]

oooh what do you think people get wrong about hoffman and gordon??

OH BOY. Starting with Hoffman, people who characterize him as a daddy dom miss the character entirely. This man is a sub. Put this man in a dog collar immediately. in all seriousness, I also think the characterization of him being a murder maniac also feels... Wrong. We see him getting rid of everything, id and so on, and that feels... Final, to me. Like his Hoffmanator Murder Spree was not intended to be survivable, and only through sheer dumb luck did he manage to live (and because the cops in Jigsaw City are like. Very bad at their jobs). I also think that Hoffman is an extremely lonely man who WANTS to help people (his volunteers of America mug for sure, but also the fact that he comforted Corbett Denlon with a stuffed animal when he didn't have to, and the fact that out of everyone, he is the Only apprentice to target multiple white supremacists) and who only really sticks around because John was leading him with affection like a horse with a carrot on a string. We see this textually when John is encouraging Mark by touching his shoulder in a parental sort of way. I think Hoffman is passively suicidal throughout most of the series because it's the only thing that makes a Lot of his decisions make sense. Also kinda fucked up to make a suicidal guy go after a suicidal target, John.

ALSO THE WHOLE SLOB HOFFMAN THING. This man redecorated his house, this man has an ART NOOK and tasteful black leather that goes with his dark cherry or mahogany furniture. This man wears suits even when he doesn't have to. This man probably smells amazing. And he's fat. Stop drawing him skinny.

ALSO Lawrence is canonically a misogynist with a criminal record who either a) punches walls or b) fights people. This is in text, in the script and in the video games (which ARE canon). Lawrence kinda sucks and he FROM THE BEGINNING doesnt think John is a murderer, so him disagreeing with jigsaw is ooc because he canonically in the movie says "jigsaw doesnt kill people". I think also Lawrence is convinced of how jigsaw does actually help, which is why he goes to the meetings. ALSO LAWRENCE DID THE BOBBY DAGEN GAMES IN MY HEART WHICH KILLED JOYCE BECAUSE HES A MISOGYNIST. Lawrence sucks SO bad as a person, but as a character he's so compelling.

IN FACT STOP DRAWING LAWRENCE SKINNY TOO

[reodashi]

BNHA Smells

M.list

...

Deku - Smells like Spreamint and Lime, it's not strong... But subtle freshness.

Bakugo - He's evil... Unintentionally. He Smells so good, like cinnomin rolls and cookies, but he hates when people get too close.

Todoroki - Subtle lavender from his clothes, and subtle vanilla from his shampoo.

Kirishima - Axe... I love him... But it's axe body spray 100%

Iida - Fresh books, pencils, and oddly cranberries... No one asks why though.

Denki - Probably the second best smelling guy in 1-A, Smells like pumpkin spice and Apple cider... He's aware of it too.

Sero - Very subtle Smells, not strong at all... But vague fresh bread scent.

Uraraka - You know she smells good, she smells like berries, frosting, and candy.

Asui - Grass... It's not bad though. She just smells like fresh cut grass.

Momo - Fancy ass perfume, costed her like 200 bucks just to smell vaguely like vanilla and cocoa powder.

Jiro - I mean this in the best possible way, but basement... Not grungy or gross, but just that nice rustic smell basements give.

Tokoyami - He got a candle named 'Death' which smells of blackberries and coconut. He's emo and berrylicious.

Shoji - Bamboo, Campfires, and Rain... All depending on the day.

Ojiro - Freshly vacuumed carpet, and if he's felling fancy he uses citrus body wash.

Hagakure - Fruity cereals, strawberry milk, and occasionally hazelnuts.

Aoyama - Everyone say it with me! 👏 Jasmine👏 Starbucks👏 and cake batter👏

Sato - Duh, flour, cake, fresh pastries, and Gingerbread.

Koda - This one is hard... He either smells like a summer garden or farm hay...

Mineta - B.O. which he says is his natural musk. And sometimes tries to hide it with axe.

Aizawa - Apple pie, fireplaces, and fresh blankets. He Smells cozy.

Allmight - He Smells like pubs... Even though he doesn't got there often... He also smells a bit like blood.

Endeavor - He Smells like charcoal, gasoline, and arrogance. He Smells like he tries to hard, which is ironic since he didn't even try hard to become #1 hero since it was just handed to him after Allmight. 👀 And never tried hard to be a good dad👀

Present Mic - He Smells like fresh technology, you know when you unbox a phone and it smells similar to a fresh phone... It's like that.

Miss Midnight - She smells like Jasmine, aphrodiacs, and rose petals... Very flirty scents.

Nezu - Hamster food and coffee... I said what needed to be said.

Eri - She smells like candy stores, carnival sweets, and fresh plushies.

Hawks - He's a mix... His breath is minty fresh, his hair smells like masculine cologne, but his clothes smell like leather even though they aren't made from leather.

Mirko - *the lingering affection from simps* Jk... Sort of. She smells like protein shakes, new shoes, and carrot cake.

Shinso - Tea, coffee, energy drinks... Anything he consumes that helps him stay awake really...

Shigiraki - I know he smells dusty, he smells like mothballs, alleyways, and Walmart 100%

Toga - She smells like blood, I mean it's inevitable due to her quirk. Other than blood, she smells like cheap makeup, like the really chemically smelling stuff.

Dabi - *Daddy issues and burnt* He smells like hot summer days, peanut butter, and bleach due to his hair dye.

Twice - Beer, cigetettes, fresh pavement, and depression.

Overhaul - He smells fine, he smells like chalk and tree bark... But his mask smells NASTY, the bitch never cleans it.

...

[spinningbagel]

IM ALIVE HELLO!!!!!!

I have a gift! In the form of art and rambling!

So this is for MB rework (take 3 I think. Idk it's been a ride trying to do this 😭🙏) and I'm going into this not just with a wish and a prayer!! I'm going into this with a wish, a prayer and and planning.

At the moment, I'm working on the characters but I've also got part of the lore for the world and areas written down; but we'll work on that full later down the line.

The order in which these characters are getting reworked is the same order they appear in in the show. So we're starting with Sheriff! Big surprise there...

So, design! It's pretty different to his canon self.

I liked the idea of a bomber jacket (I got the idea from @dem0nguy and his redesign of Sheriffs flight school outfit!) and I also liked the idea that it had originally belonged to Ryan and Sheriff took it in order to feel as though he was following his older brothers footsteps. It'd be something he would've taken after losing Ryan and being bitten before fleeing the military base they had been at at the time the apocalypse begun.

The scarf acts as a mask as Sheriff isn't good with or fond of anything technological (like the masks) and tries to avoid it when possible. That and Brutux is the one in control of all of that sort of supplies and he's in enough debt as is. So, scarf it is. It has varying levels of protection against smells and the air but for the most part, does the job it needs to do.

Tried to make him less obnoxiously blue, I get it's his colour or whatever but it burns my eyes/j

Ah no, aside from his shirt, the blue on his shoes and pants is darker and leans more towards navy than anything.

Uhhm I think that's the most notable things to say about his change in design, just the fact he's got the addition of the jacket and bag and is less obnoxiously blue!

Now, his mutation..yay,,

So that's the same, story wise and practically design wise. Still gets bitten when the apocalypse starts and still keeps it from fully mutating him by devouring carrots.

The only real difference in its design is the colour, less of a darker green. And the fact that it's actively dripping. He has to wrap up pretty tightly so it's not getting everywhere and blowing his cover.

His arm isn't quite solid nor is it fully a liquid, it's some odd mix between both. There's not much feeling in it either, was talking to a friend and mentioned how if you stabbed it, it'd just kinda go through and be nothing but a dull ache. And if in a fight, the mutated arm becomes a shield; Sheriff putting it in front of himself to prevent getting hurt anywhere it'd actually hurt.

In terms of things the mutation affects besides his arm we have:

- Sharper teeth, especially his canines

- It's pretty annoying for him, and he usually has an intense urge to bite and chew things to get rid of the uncomfortableness of it

- Accelerated hair growth

- He tries to keep it at an acceptable length, one that won't get in his way but he might just eventually give up. His hair is denser and it's a nightmare for him to try and do anything with it. It's a mess most of the time and usually is thrown into a ponytail where he just hopes for the best.

- Enhanced strength

- Sheriff has a base of 3/5 for his strength but occasionally has bursts of extra strength that'd bump that to a 5/5 (because yknow, he's held up a one tonne metal door with his bare hands). It's only ever in short bursts of strength and he 100% feels the consequences once that fades. But yknow, not the worst thing.

- Prone to aggression

- Not too much of a reasoning for this one other than the fact the mutants are just typically aggressive creatures

- Hoarding

- There is no explanation for this one

- Faintly picking up on orders directed to other mutants

- So, I like to think that the mutants are controlled as a hive, receiving orders from more conscious mutants like Wart. And even then, Wart is getting orders from the SM. Sheriff picks up on the SM's orders- the further he is the fainter it is. I also like to think the SM holds some control over Sheriff. Not a lot but enough to cause problems.

So I think that's it? I can't say much on his actual backstory as that's still a WIP but it pretty much follows canon, if only some minor changes here and there.

Uhhh, I guess just don't hate me for doing another rewrite of this show- there's going to be an actual commitment to this one but I do warn it is going to be a looong, slow project. I want to take my time with this one, especially because it's just for fun :)

Shooters next! Feel free to ask questions and I will try and answer o7

Bagel out!