#and the works not even that bad its genuinely not that hard this is all a me problem ughfjfnfnhkfnf | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

revelboo · 13 hours ago

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I literally can't get enough of your writing like I need it like oxygen at this point 🙌 I am not above begging for more of Everything is alright or Over it now

My heart is literally hurting for Star because he genuinely didn't know, and he finally is starting to be vulnerable, and now he knows it's not going to last no matter what. And the inner turmoil of the reader being so torn between him and Soundwave? Wanting both but not being able to hurt Star after he put everything at risk?? It's so good but it hurts my heart 😭😭

And Jazz finally getting someone who would listen to his feelings and get to know the real him under all his masks?? The poor guy needs that so bad, and he's finally opening up (even if she can't understand what he's saying)

All in all, your writing is amazing, and you are literally amazing ✨️✨️✨️

Thank you! I have a lot of fun overthinking why the characters act the way they do and trying to get into their heads

Over It Now Pt 11

IDW Jazz x Reader

• “You could just let me take you,” he says as he watches you lock the door and do an awkward shuffle to put the keys away while trying to not drop one of your crutches in the process. Leaving him for work again. Wanting to help, but also knowing exactly how stubborn you are as you eye the stairs off your porch. He’d also figured out forgiveness was much easier to ask for than permission, reaching to lift you in his servos and carefully set you down in the driveway crutches and all bypassing the steps and then backing up to fall forward into his alt mode.

• Heart racing at being picked up unexpectedly, you warm watching his antics. Because he knows you struggle with the steps and he’d saved you from dealing with them when he didn’t have to. “We both know you have better things to do than chauffeur me around,” you say, trying not to laugh when he opens the driver’s side door and wags it back and forth in invitation.

• “Come for a ride, doll. I’ll behave.” Door still open, he fully expects you to walk past him to your own ugly car, so it’s a surprise when you slide in the driver’s seat and awkwardly lean the crutches in the passenger side. And then you’re right there and he’s more aware of you this way somehow than when he’s held you in his servos. You’re warm against him, soft hands brushing the steering wheel hesitantly as if not sure if it’s okay and he can smell your soap, your shampoo, you. “Alright,” he murmurs more to himself than to you, because it’s a small thing, but you’re entrusting yourself to him. And that means so much.

• There’s no way to not overthink that you’re sitting inside Jazz and it’s weird. You end up folding your hands in your lap so you don’t touch anything you shouldn’t. Inhaling as the shifter moves on its own and then the wheel spins as he reverses. “Doll, you’re going to have to at least pretend to drive,” he laughs and he’s right. Other drivers might notice you’re just sitting there so you just barely touch your palms to the wheel, letting it move freely against your skin.

• Primus, you’re precious. Eyes darting all over his interior, trying so hard not to touch anything. “What do you do normally? I mean a phantom car driving itself has to freak people out,” you mumble, shifting against him as he turns onto the road, wheels humming. Liking the feel of having you there, surrounded by him and safe, it takes a moment to actually understand your question. It’s not nearly the same as holding you in his hands, but still comforting to him that you’re there with him. It doesn’t take a lot of energy, but he does have to concentrate to create a holomatter avatar in the passenger side seat to show you what he normally does, not bothering to make it solid at all since your crutches are embedded in the avatar’s legs and torso and your head turns as it appears. He’s not sure what he expected, but it’s definitely not for you to scream and throw yourself against the inside of his door.

• “It’s me. It’s an avatar,” the glitchy thing in the passenger seat is saying in Jazz’s voice, holding up big hands as you nearly have a heart attack. “Doll, it’s okay. Sorry, I just-frag.” And the human shaped thing flickers and fades, leaving your heart hammering against your ribs. You’re still plastered to the door, hands curled into fists. “Were you going to punch me?” Yes. You absolutely were, because it had just been there so suddenly, a fixed grin on a fake looking face that was staring right at you, Eyes closing you lean your forehead against the cool glass of the driver’s side window and try to calm down and instead start laughing. Covering your face with your hands as he vents at you in exasperation, blowing warm air across your skin and you realize he’s never asked where you work, an address or anything. So how does he know where to take you? Has he been following you?

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jojotichakorn · 2 days ago

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i started penning a post about how i always find it narratively unsatisfying when an arc ends with a conclusion the following arc breaks, regardless of how realistic the repetition of the same mistake might be, which is still true, but i actually want to talk about something else right now.

i feel like, at least at this stage, jack is in a position that is both generally unrealistic and untrue to the specific events of the series. 'jack and joker' has a clear focus on poverty and money and class issues, but it seems to treat jack in a very special way. he somehow manages to stand on the moral high ground above other characters. specifically, other poor characters. which is, first of all, a little ridiculous, since he was indeed a debt collector and, in fact, almost became the boss's son. and, second of all, is generally Not Great, because it does idolise the idea that if you "just try hard enough", you won't "allow" yourself to be backed into a corner and therefore won't have to do bad things.

now, don't get me wrong, i am not saying that our characters who have made mistakes are completely blameless. tattoo did shitty things (and hoy followed suit), safe did shitty things, hope frankly admitted to enjoying doing shitty things. however, if we zoom out a little, we will see that all these characters are in a situation that is inherently unfair to them. we have all of these poor people in immense amounts of debt and then we have this disgusting rich motherfucker whose entire wealth is literally based on making their lives as miserable and unfair as they are. and i think that, in this particular case, the series would have actually benefited from a dichotomy. don't get me wrong, i'm usually absolutely brimming with nuance and also asking "what lies outside of it?" but this shall be my exception. (though you could say that joke already brings some nuance to it - he is initially from a well-off family and he actively makes choices to the benefit of poor people, despite it resulting in him being ostracised from said family and its riches).

jack walks the line of being poor and managing not to do anything "too bad" like he is a fucking circus performer on a wire. and, don't get me wrong, he is genuinely a selfless character. he makes choices that a lot of other characters in the same circumstances wouldn't make. he remains in debt and continues working for the boss because he keeps trying to help people and pay off their debts first - that is admirable. however, he himself was already set up for more success than others. sure, being forced to become a debt collector isn't a walk in the park, but most other debtors didn't even have that choice. jack has to work for the boss in order to stay afloat - that is an undeniably hard task. the other people the boss collects debts from, however, have to come up with a lot of money out of thin air - that is not simply a hard task, that is an impossible one that is designed to trap them in the cycle of doing this impossible task forever. that being said, ultimately, jack is still poor. his own hamster wheel should be somewhere around the corner, that's always the case. this idea is where i wish they would have taken jack's arc.

from the moment when he refused to marry rose, there was no escape for him. finally, much like our other poor characters, he found himself stuck between a rock and a hard place. (and i think that it's very thematically appropriate for jack's particular "i can't do this anymore, i deserve to live a full life" sentiment to be connected to love, since he is, after all, a lead of a romance drama). he made the decision to say "no" and from that point on, he was completely and utterly fucked. because, realistically, that conversation that he had with the boss after refusing rose was insane. i don't know what he would have done to jack exactly, if that was a genuine conversation and there was no exchange of jack's freedom for the ring, but it would not have been anything good.

so i wish jack had to make the actual tough call there, instead of having joke save him all on his own (and later take the fall for it). and if it was, at least in some capacity, jack's decision to steal that ring, he would finally be placed in a situation where every other poor character already inevitably found themselves in. because the entire system is rigged against all of them and they are eventually always forced to do things that they should have never even had to consider in the first place. but they deserve better than living a life set up for them by evil rich people who literally live off of their suffering and they are allowed - no, at some point they simply have no choice but to - fight for a better life.

this, in my opinion, would have been a much more powerful message and - not to circle back to my personal preferences - would have also not left us with joke making the very same mistake that we decided we should never make again at the end of the previous arc.

#jack and joker #jack and joker: ep 10 #archer watches j&j

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crustyfloor · 4 months ago

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Either Ivan knows how to cry on command or he is actually the worlds biggest crybaby in disguise, and his tears are naturally so minuscule. He’s not a big crier

His little baby teardrops 😭

#alien stage #alnst ivan #alien stage ivan #alnst #I find it interesting. He could be doing it to get sympathy when he’s with Till but—what if he’s just that much of a baby #Hmm #its very silly to me #It works though…I feel a little bad seeing him so pathetic #ivan alnst #Yes ivan is hard at emotions. but instinct is a hard thing to surpass even for his condition. id like to think he developed it as a skill #since most situations. things wouldnt get to him. so for example when he'd be at a funeral he needs to learn to look mournful. at times whe #its normal having the ability to just cry when you want is useful #but for scenes like black sorrow #i think it's all genuine. you cant fake that kind of expression.

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sunfyrisms · 22 days ago

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sometimes the ultimate form of self care is pretending season two of house of the dragon simply was never made. and that’s okay!

#house of the dragon #astra.txt #anti hotd #hotd critical #i am aware of how hard many people worked to make season two possible and i respect that #like it just sucks more because season two is genuinely bad and it’s not even their fault #yes season one had its flaws but it was somewhat coherent #season two just:#we don’t understand our own story or characters!#like oh my god?#the people who gave it their all and genuinely wanted to tell a story deserve better #the actors deserve better and so do their characters #no character was done justice #there is nothing more frustrating when consuming media #than an adaptation not understanding its own characters and story #or worse #understanding it but purposefully ignoring it to suit their own narrative #it’s just sad is all

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kohakhearts · 28 days ago

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given the opportunity i could be approximately 500% more annoying about any of my creative projects. but unfortunately .my brain is soup,

#taylor.txt #i have so much to say but sometimes i worry that sharing all my thoughts comes across as annoying LOL #like i know its a milliontimes more interesting if i like. write and post fics rather than go on and on about how i incorporated x obscure #symbol and it was Really Fun but man i work so much and my energy levels are such an uphill battle always #i just dont have the ability to write as much as i used to. but i still THINK about writing all the time and i do wanna share with the class #but i just dont have it in me to do unprompted because genuinely. Who Cares dskcjkxbcms #again. its more interesting to read the fic. the author’s 2am notes are not as thought-provoking as i think they are at 2am #all this being said MAN i wish i had time to write request fics. i want to so bad. but even just writing in general is so hard some days #my workload is manageable im just struggling. as usual. happy october yall #i have had a headache bordering on migraine for like 48 hours #and actually my workload isnt manageable because i just want to stay home</3

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sundial-bee-scribbles · 2 months ago

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"my education is my highest priority" everything returns to vocaloid

#delete later #shitpost #vocaloid #?? idk i might keep it up. yes ik turning off rbs is a thing now technically but i always keep forgetting and also naaaah.#i might go edit proper tags in later just bc i dont this to show up in main pages but i needdddddd the organization on here #i made this a while back procrastinating on a linguistics reading and then never posted it #AND THE CIRCLE IS COMPLETE BC IM POSTING IT NOW WHILE PROCRASTINATING ON ANOTHER LINGUISTICS READING LMAOO #dudeee i gotta lock in. oh my god. its so bad up in here triple assault. i cant focus on SHIT. WHY DO I ALWAYS GET IDEAS WHEN IM BUSY AHGHH #this might be revealing a bit too much info but pls this is legit what happened LMAOO 😭🥴#we're starting ipa alphabet stuff now and im like 'hey i already know you...' from phoneme fuckery ive had to do for voca shitposts #knowing linguistics is cool cause u get to dissect what makes languages work and i thought that'd be genuinely helpful for things #like i plan to do more english/spanish translation work specifically so yuh. but also I KNOW internally in my heart...#despite trying to give the professional justifications I KNOW my stupid ass is secretly just absorbing all this knowledge for voca purposes #my brand of shitposting goes against the very origin of the word since 'shitposting' originally refers to very low effort low quality memes #so there's been a semantic shift in definition even outside of mine but i still think its really funny. i put a lot of genuine hard work #into making stupid little jokes to amuse primarily myself and maybe anyone else who finds it on the internet. so yea #no but genuinely though its unironically incredible how much shit i've learned direct or indirectly for vocaloid shitposting purposes

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innalheid · 2 months ago

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Feeling very Ascension by Gorillaz ft Vince Staples at 2:18

#i need to solve a puzzle or some shit. god. fuck.#i cant concentrate on anything i cant fall asleep i cant stay asleep i cant stay awake i cant wake up on time #i hate depression 😒 and all the other things wrong with me yknow #i need to do something like. good for me. but its so damn hard to drag myself into doing that too #brain. stop being so foggy. please.#im even like. im eating im drinking water. i could probably like do some sort of exercise but everything makes me so tired.....#like even a walk yknow? i do my shift at work and im at 3% battery. i dont. i dont know what to do man #and i dont even wanna die about it???? im actively NOT suicidal for once #like are you kidding me??? ive been suicidal for like over a decade and for once #my brain is still popping up like have you considered killing yourself? 🤔 but im Genuinely not swayed by it at all #which is weird. and probably good. but now i just feel like. numb #stuck. stagnant. foggy. can we PLEASE cut through this fog and have some meaningful brain functions for a little bit. brain. cmon #i dont wanna die but i *do* wanna sleep for like. three days #i want a week off where i have NOTHIN to do #genuinely nothing to do. chores are done work is on pause i need nothing creeping in at the edges thinkin bout #ohhhhh you should be doing this instead..........youre wasting your time........do a task.....#but i cant i cant do a task. i cant. and its so frustrating and i feel bad about it #id feel much worse about it if my BRAIN wasnt as foggy as fucking SAN FRANCISCO #and i keep trying like. healthy ways of ''feeling something'' like hobbies i like or yummy food #nothin. does fuckin nothin. i get off and it gives me a Little bit of clarity Maybe. like #no wonder bad coping mechanisms happen yknow??? its an absolute fucking miracle i havent taken up smoking #anyway. i need to go to bed. tomorrows gonna be a long day. if you feel so inclined send me mental love or something. im fuckin tired folks.

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guinevereslancelot · 2 months ago

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decided to leave my job and i'm gonna fr gonna cryyyyy

#literally can't work with my new boss bc i can't trust her #she went to the head of the department with complaints abt me without ever speaking to me or giving me any indication she was unhappy #and various other reasons im not happy w management and the school in general #HOWEVER #i love the kids sm and im gonna miss them and worry abt them 😭😭😭😭#im literally scared for some of them bc it feels like the other teachers have no empathy for some of my favorite kids #one of them who is so so sweet and when he cries i'm the girst to comfort him bc everyone else thinks he needs to toughen up 😭#also my new boss sucks so so bad and is gonna be such a bad influence on him and all the other kids #and my main co teacher said she's gonna quit if i do so i cant even beg her to look out for my babies and take care of them 😭💔#and it would be unprofessional to mention any concerns to the parents but genuinely some of the kids would be better off elsewhere #like im actually worried about it #i dont want some of the really sweet sensitive kids to lose their sweetness bc they're being treated unkindly #and the worst bullies and spoiled kids are the ones the teachers dote on #so it encourages some of the sweet ones to act out for attention #anyway 💔#i really do need to go tho #and i'm sure i'll love the kids at my new job #but im so sadddd #also its unlikely i can find a well paying job w this age group even tho i love this age group #its basically impossible not to get attached to them at this age and i get to pick them up and hold and cuddle them and stuff #and you cant really do that with the older kids sadly #literally on the verge of tears even seriously thinking abt leaving #things have been p bad for a while due to management but i never seriously considered leaving bc i love the kids so much #but i literally can't see a future here #and my new boss clearly hates me and im worried she's going to try to get me fired #she already made up a bunch of lies about me and its only been three weeks #anyway i only make 15 an hour so hopefully i'll at least get more somewhere else and i know i'll still love the kids #its just really hard #which is why i've stayed this long #i was p unhappy before my new boss even started bc of the way they treated my old boss

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rewrite-canon · 1 year ago

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me when sad media piece about romantic relationship: light work no reaction

me when sad media piece about sibling dynamic: oh. okay. its got a little kick.

me when sad media piece about child-parental figure dynamic: LET ME GET UP LET ME GET UP LET ME GET UP ELT MEGET UP ELT ME GET UP ELTMR FJETY UP LEGBR LE FEOT UP

#me when #i just watched aftersun and when i tell you the symptoms that movie gave me were PLAGUE-LIKE #its bcuz i cried so much throughout that my eyes are still swollen (its the morning after)#1. got a headache from how hard i cried and had to sit down #2. passed out right after the film (it was early)#3. i had work earlier and fucked my knee during my shift. it hurt so bad but after the movie my body was so numb i couldnt even feel it #4. dehydration from crying so much #5. tummy ache from crying so much. also felt like throwing up #6. became delirious and started thinking about my DAD DYING 😭 had to be with him for two hours to calm down lmfao #all in all: DONT WATCH AFTERSUN. the worst movie ever i genuinely wanted to die #still five stars tho #but im seeing a pattern in all my fav media. hm #aftersun #everything everywhere all at once #eeaao #tlou #the last of us #lady bird #beautiful boy #fancy dance #circe #michiko and hatchin #the astonishing colour of after #wolf children #the cruel prince #<- im only tagging tcp bcuz jude and madoc’s relationship was honestly the best part abt the series #rewriting

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moomoorare · 6 months ago

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Hough just ended my second shift of first day. Holy fuck my feet

#i do gen like this kinda job #its hard as balls bc im short as fuck so to reach i have to fly (use ladders)#and tomorrow they'll start teaching me gow to use the money money ding ding thing im having an english langue lapsus #ive worked a lot today #and tbh i was kinda oversoing it a bit cus I WANT THE JOB #but also damn i gotta chill #the ppl are really nice and also the clients surprisingly #it is probably bc im the daughter of one of the most beloved dude in my town so lol #literally all day was like “ooooh youre the daggter of*****' and me like. like yes. then all my family tree #likes heres the thing the bad is that its ouchie on my feet #but i get good money for my first job #and i genuinely like interacting with people even tho im so anxious lol #rare rambling

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raven · 19 days ago

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i know i have a lot in my life but literally the only reason im alive is because my parents are paying for it all. like genuinely if i was just a little bit unluckier i would have killed myself. and its like i kind of dont do anything and resenting people who can just do more than me is wrong but also like... I genuinely cannot do anything. i have no energy. i see the way normal people live and it makes me ache. I CANT FUCKING DO ANYTHING!!! I REALLY SHOULD BE DEAD THERE IS VERY LITTLE POINT

#but i have video games so like. its not gonna happen. but genuinely #like no i dont work hard but i also cant work hard? i cant fucking do anything i can barely get out of bed #i can barely even think most days. im too tired to focus my eyes i wear reading glasses sometimes to make it easier #like idk. its genuinely so bad lol and i have a lot of hatred and resentment for anyone who can just. go to sleep. wake up in the morning.#even work. like i missed out on so much of my life because of all this and im missing out on more. i cant even do drugs

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icewindandboringhorror · 2 months ago

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It always seems a bit unbalanced on The Great Food Truck Race when there will be multiple teams who are cooking a wide variety of complex dishes with 10 different components and a bunch of prep work, and then there's that one team who like... exclusively serves plain crepes with some premade nutella on them, or plain waffles with just some whipped cream and cut up strawberries lol...