#and the shortcomings that might present

[multiversal-pudding]

Shoutouts to an underdiscussed Horror of the Looky Loo Storybook

Like. Just to ignore the whole thing about bricking up Poppy’s window for a minute- these people thought the way to brick something up in the first place involved sticking the bricks together with glitter glue. Forget The Horrors, these people aren’t gonna make it past the next time it rains-

[hellohoihey]

Simultaniously doing two group projects where i'm doing the least of everyone for one and the most for the other sure is an experience.

[pearlprincess02]

what you lie about (mercury signs & houses)

aries mercury

mercury in aries often lies about their intentions or feelings. this placement is characterized by a quick, impulsive thought process, which can lead to hasty statements or exaggerated claims. an aries mercury might exaggerate or downplay aspects of their situation to appear more confident or to avoid vulnerability. they might also lie to cover up mistakes or to stay ahead in competitive scenarios, driven by their desire to maintain control and assert their independence. their approach to communication is usually direct and energetic, but the impulsiveness can lead to inconsistencies or half-truths when they feel cornered or pressured.

taurus mercury

mercury in taurus tends to lie about practical matters and personal resources. this placement values stability and security, so taurus mercury might distort the truth to protect their financial situation, possessions, or personal comfort. they could be inclined to exaggerate their wealth or downplay their expenses to maintain an image of financial stability or competence. their lies are often motivated by a desire to avoid conflict, preserve their status, or keep their personal life secure and private. taurus mercury’s approach to communication is typically deliberate and cautious, so when they do lie, it’s usually well thought out and aimed at preserving their sense of security.

gemini mercury

mercury in gemini often lies about details and facts, driven by a desire to navigate social dynamics and maintain a flexible image. this placement values intellectual stimulation and social interaction, so gemini mercury might exaggerate, omit, or twist facts to entertain, impress, or fit in with different groups. they might also lie to avoid confrontation or to adapt quickly to changing situations, ensuring they can keep up with the fast-paced social environment. their lies are usually more about maintaining curiosity or keeping conversations engaging rather than malicious intent, reflecting their ever-shifting interests and adaptability.

cancer mercury

mercury in cancer often lies about their emotions and personal circumstances. this placement is deeply connected to their inner world and can be sensitive about their vulnerabilities. as a result, cancer mercury might distort the truth to protect their emotional well-being or to shield their private life from scrutiny. they may downplay their feelings or fabricate stories to avoid appearing weak or to maintain a sense of control over their personal narrative. their lies are often motivated by a desire to create a safe, comforting environment for themselves and others, reflecting their need to manage how they are perceived emotionally and protect their sensitive nature.

leo mercury

mercury in leo often lies about their achievements and personal importance. this placement values recognition and admiration, so leo mercury might embellish or exaggerate their accomplishments, talents, or status to enhance their image and garner praise. they may fabricate details to appear more impressive or to maintain their dominant presence in social situations. their lies are typically motivated by a desire to shine and be acknowledged, reflecting their need for validation and a strong sense of self-worth. leo mercury's communication style is often grandiose and dramatic, and their fabrications usually aim to reinforce their sense of superiority and influence.

virgo mercury

mercury in virgo often lies about their imperfections and mistakes. this placement values precision and efficiency, and virgo mercury might downplay or obscure errors, shortcomings, or personal flaws to maintain an image of competence and control. they may also be inclined to embellish details or present overly polished versions of reality to avoid criticism or to uphold their high standards. their lies are driven by a need to appear reliable and capable, reflecting their anxiety about making mistakes or falling short of their own rigorous expectations. virgo mercury's communication is typically meticulous and analytical, and their fabrications often serve to preserve their perceived perfectionism and competence.

libra mercury

mercury in libra often lies about their true opinions and feelings to maintain harmony and avoid conflict. this placement values balance and relationships, so libra mercury might obscure their genuine thoughts or preferences to keep the peace or to align with the expectations of others. they may also exaggerate or soften their views to avoid rocking the boat or to present themselves as agreeable and diplomatic. their lies are typically motivated by a desire to sustain social harmony and avoid discord, reflecting their strong emphasis on creating and preserving pleasant interactions and maintaining a fair, balanced atmosphere.

scorpio mercury

mercury in scorpio often lies about their deeper motives and personal vulnerabilities. this placement values privacy and emotional intensity, so scorpio mercury might obscure their true intentions or feelings to protect themselves from being exposed or manipulated. they may also conceal their strategic thinking or hidden agendas, driven by a need to maintain control and leverage in situations. their lies are typically motivated by a desire to safeguard their inner world and maintain power in their interactions, reflecting their tendency to navigate life with a sense of secrecy and psychological depth.

sagittarius mercury

mercury in sagittarius often lies about details and commitments, driven by their desire for freedom and exploration. this placement values honesty and big-picture thinking but can be prone to exaggerating or glossing over specifics to avoid feeling constrained or bogged down by mundane details. sagittarius mercury might fabricate or embellish stories to make their experiences sound more adventurous or to align with their optimistic outlook. their lies are usually motivated by a need to maintain their sense of excitement and spontaneity, reflecting their resistance to being tied down by practical constraints or tedious commitments.

capricorn mercury

mercury in capricorn often lies about their achievements and the extent of their responsibilities. this placement values status, structure, and reliability, so capricorn mercury might downplay challenges or exaggerate their accomplishments to project an image of competence and control. they may also conceal their struggles or mistakes to avoid appearing vulnerable or inadequate. their lies are typically motivated by a desire to maintain their authoritative position and protect their reputation, reflecting their need to uphold their professional and personal image as steadfast and capable.

aquarius mercury

mercury in aquarius often lies about their true thoughts and personal beliefs to fit in with unconventional or progressive ideals. this placement values originality and social ideals, so aquarius mercury might obscure their genuine opinions or downplay their personal views to align with a group’s vision or to maintain their image as a forward-thinking individual. they may also fabricate details to seem more innovative or to keep up with rapidly evolving ideas. their lies are typically motivated by a desire to blend into or influence social trends, reflecting their need to be seen as part of the cutting-edge or socially aware crowd.

pisces mercury

mercury in pisces often lies about their true feelings and personal realities. this placement values empathy and imagination, so pisces mercury might obscure or romanticize the truth to protect others’ feelings or to create a more idealized version of events. they may also fabricate details to avoid confronting uncomfortable realities or to escape from harsh truths. their lies are typically motivated by a desire to maintain emotional harmony, avoid conflict, or preserve their idealistic view of the world, reflecting their sensitivity and tendency to navigate life through a lens of compassion and fantasy.

in houses

mercury in 1st house: their true age, their real height, their actual weight, their genuine feelings, their past mistakes, their hidden insecurities, their secret fears, their financial situation, their academic struggles, their social awkwardness, their lack of confidence, their unpopular opinions, their embarrassing moments, their guilty pleasures, their secret talents, their hidden desires, their biggest regrets, their darkest secrets, their manipulative tactics, their true intentions,

mercury in 2nd house: their financial status, their debt, their spending habits, their savings, their investments, their job security, their salary, their inheritance, their possessions, their material desires, their financial goals, their money management skills, their business failures, their gambling habits, their shopping addiction, their financial dependence, their greed, their materialism, their stinginess, their financial secrets,

mercury in 3rd house: their intelligence, their knowledge, their grades, their communication skills, their writing ability, their reading habits, their language skills, their travel experiences, their social skills, their sense of humor, their gossip, their secrets, their lies, their manipulations, their gaslighting tactics, their ability to persuade, their power of persuasion, their ability to deceive, their knack for storytelling, their ability to adapt,

mercury in 4th house: their family background, their childhood experiences, their home life, their relationship with parents, their siblings' secrets, their family's financial status, their family's history, their family traditions, their home address, their neighborhood, their hometown, their country of origin, their ancestry, their family secrets, their family feuds, their family scandals, their family's dark secrets, their family's mental health issues, their family's criminal history, their family's secrets,

mercury in 5th house: their romantic interests, their dating history, their number of partners, their flirtatious behavior, their cheating habits, their creative talents, their artistic abilities, their gambling addiction, their love for drama, their need for attention, their childish behavior, their lack of commitment, their fear of intimacy, their jealousy issues, their possessiveness, their manipulative tactics, their hidden desires, their secret fantasies, their true intentions, their emotional instability,

mercury in 6th house: their work ethic, their job responsibilities, their salary, their health issues, their daily routine, their diet & exercise habits, their sleep schedule, their stress levels, their time management skills, their organizational abilities, their work-life balance, their job satisfaction, their career aspirations, their performance reviews, their sick days, their work conflicts, their job hunting process, their professional networking, their career failures, their mental health struggles,

mercury in 7th house: their relationship status, their partner's flaws, their own flaws in the relationship, their commitment level, their future plans with their partner, their expectations from the relationship, their compatibility with their partner, their communication issues, their jealousy, their possessiveness, their infidelity, their past relationships, their exes, their love languages, their arguments, their disagreements, their shared values, their long-term goals as a couple, their financial situation as a couple, their plans for the future,

mercury in 8th house: their financial situation, their debts, their inheritances, their shared finances with partners, their investments, their tax returns, their insurance policies, their wills, their fears about death, their obsessions, their addictions, their secrets, their grudges, their dark desires, their hidden agendas, their manipulative tactics, their power plays, their control issues, their vulnerability, their deepest fears,

mercury in 9th house: their educational background, their travel experiences, their foreign language skills, their philosophical beliefs, their religious views, their political opinions, their cultural background, their intellectual abilities, their knowledge of world events, their interest in current affairs, their love of learning, their thirst for knowledge, their open-mindedness, their tolerance, their respect for diversity, their prejudices, their biases, their bigotry, their ignorance, their arrogance,

mercury in 10th house: their job title, their salary, their career aspirations, their work-life balance, their job satisfaction, their relationship with their boss, their performance reviews, their job security, their career failures, their professional networking, their ambition, their work ethic, their time management skills, their leadership abilities, their public image, their professional reputation, their awards & recognitions, their career goals, their career path, their industry knowledge,

mercury in 11th house: their friendships, their social life, their group memberships, their online presence, their social media following, their networking skills, their popularity, their influence, their humanitarian work, their political views, their social activism, their rebellious nature, their desire for freedom, their need for independence, their fear of commitment, their aversion to authority, their ability to make friends easily, their social skills, their networking abilities, their desire for connection,

mercury in 12th house: their fears, their insecurities, their doubts, their weaknesses, their vulnerabilities, their past traumas, their mental health struggles, their addictions, their secrets, their lies, their manipulative tactics, their dark desires, their hidden agendas, their power plays, their control issues, their jealousy, their possessiveness, their resentment, their anger, their loneliness,

all observations belong to @pearlprincess02

main masterlist

[03jyh23]

— starlight, guide light, and everything in between || jeong yunho

In the quiet moments of parenthood, amidst the tears and the laughter, we find strength in each other's arms, and love that knows no bounds.

first-time dad!yunho x first-time mom!reader

genre: angst, fluff

trigger warnings: infant distress/crying; illegitimate child; parental anxiety/panic; emotional distress; breastfeeding; postpartum experiences

words: 3.8 k

reminder: what you're about to read is purely fiction, so let's keep it separate from reality.

!minors do not interact!

— hi there! the time has finally come, and im publishing my first Yunho fic 🥹 lately, some kind of maternal instinct seems to have awakened in me, and i had to get it out somehow 😭😭 i guess im getting old. just to clarify, i haven't given birth myself or have kids, so this fic is solely written based on my imagination of what it might feel like postpartum.

love, monika. ♡

if you enjoyed this post, i'd be so grateful for a little love – a like, reblog or comment would truly make my day!

You were dozing off wrapped in Yunho’s arms, your head in the crook of his neck, his smell calming your tired body. Your eyes were heavy, and it was getting harder to fight sleep. His hand was creasing your sides softly, lulling you to sleep. Being curled up on top of your boyfriend was your favorite place on earth. There was something incredibly comforting about being wrapped up in Yunho’s arms, feeling his warmth and steady heartbeat. It's like your own little sanctuary, a safe place where you can let go of all your worries and just be present in the moment. And falling asleep like that, with the gentle rhythm of Yunho's breathing and the soft touch of his hand, felt like drifting off into a dreamland.

It was a little over a month since your life was turned upside down when your little daughter was born. In that short period, every aspect of your world had shifted, reshaped by the arrival of this tiny, precious bundle of joy. The days had blurred together in a whirlwind of feedings, diaper changes, and sleepless nights. Yet amidst the chaos, there were moments of pure magic—how your daughter's eyes would light up with wonder at the world around her, the soft coos and gurgles that melted your heart, and the overwhelming sense of love that filled every corner of your home. But alongside the joy, there were also moments of doubt and uncertainty. Yunho, however, was deeply scared and anxious about becoming a father to a daughter. The mere thought of holding the fragile little being, feeding her, or changing her, filled him with a sense of fear and hesitation. It almost seemed like he was unable, or unwilling, to form an emotional bond with the newborn. This emotional disconnect was not just limited to the baby. Ever since you gave birth, a sense of apprehension and fear had gripped him. It was as if he was afraid to hold you, to touch you, and to confront the changes that your body had undergone postpartum.

The vulnerability that came with postpartum recovery was like nothing you had ever experienced before. Your body felt foreign, every movement was accompanied by a dull ache, a reminder of the physical toll that bringing your daughter into the world had exacted. But it wasn't just the physical changes that left you feeling vulnerable—it was the emotional upheaval as well. The hormonal fluctuations, the sleep deprivation, the overwhelming responsibility of caring for a newborn—all of it combined to create a perfect storm of doubt and insecurity. In those moments of vulnerability, you had expected Yunho to be your rock, your unwavering source of support and comfort. Yet, his actions—or rather, his lack of them—left you feeling more alone than ever. His hesitation to hold your daughter, and his reluctance to look at your postpartum body, all served as a painful reminder of your perceived shortcomings as a mother and a partner. You couldn't help but wonder if Yunho found you unlovable now if the changes wrought by childbirth had somehow diminished your worth in his eyes. It was a cruel thought, born out of fear and insecurity, but it lingered nonetheless, festering like an open wound in your heart. You couldn't help but feel a sense of helplessness wash over you. The distance between you and your boyfriend felt insurmountable, a gaping chasm that threatened to swallow you whole.

That's why today's little nap meant everything to you. For the first time since the birth of Yunmi, Yunho was holding you like this, providing you with the comfort and warmth you longed for.

"Wait, did you hear that?" Yunho’s soft voice disrupted your nap. Not in your right state of mind yet, you just hummed against his neck, your eyes not opening even for a second. With a gentle hand, Yunho shifted you slightly, allowing himself to slip out from beneath your embrace. As he rose from the bed, you blinked groggily, trying to shake off the remnants of sleep that clung to your senses.

"What is it?" you murmured, your voice thick with sleep. Yunho's expression was one of quiet concern as he motioned towards the crib.

"I think she's awake," he whispered, his tone barely audible in the dimly lit room. Your exhaustion weighed heavily on every limb, making even the simplest tasks seem daunting. With a weariness that seemed to seep into your bones, you clung to the pillows, seeking refuge in their soft embrace.

"Could you get her?" you whispered, your voice barely above a hoarse murmur, as you heard the soft cry emanating from the crib. You mustered all your strength to sit up and shake off the tiredness as you looked at Yunho standing still next to the crib, almost as if he was unable to move any closer. Each cry felt like a dagger to your heart, a reminder of your inability to provide the comfort that your daughter so desperately needed.

"I think it's better if you take her," he said, his voice devoid of emotion, his gaze fixed on the wall as if unwilling to meet your eyes. The words struck you like a slap in the face, igniting a firestorm of indignation deep within your chest. Yunho's refusal to take Yunmi stirred a storm of emotions within you. Anger, frustration, hurt—all of it boiled beneath the surface, threatening to spill over at any moment. How could he still refuse to take responsibility for his own daughter? How could he stand there, staring blankly ahead, while you bore the brunt of exhaustion and fatigue?

"Yunho, how can you—" you began as you stood up from the bed, your voice trembling with emotion, but the words caught in your throat, choked off by the weight of your anger and hurt. Tears welled in your eyes, hot and stinging, as you struggled to contain the torrent of emotions threatening to overwhelm you. As you approached the crib, your hands clenched into fists at your sides, your breath coming in ragged gasps as you fought to maintain control. You leaned over the crib to take Yunmi into your arms and care for her. With a shaky breath, you turned away from Yunho, cradling your daughter close to your chest as you retreated to the living room. You weren't surprised that Yunho stayed behind in the bedroom, his presence a silent reminder of the distance that had grown between you. With a heavy heart, you settled onto the couch, cradling Yunmi in your arms as you prepared to breastfeed her. Your daughter's eyelids drooped as she nursed, the weight of exhaustion finally catching up to her. With each gentle suckle, she grew more and more drowsy, her tiny fingers curling against your skin in a gesture of contentment. As you watched her drift off to sleep, a pang of guilt tugged at your heart. You had expected Yunho to be there for you, to support you through the challenges of motherhood, yet time and time again, he had fallen short of your expectations. Yunmi finally drifted off to sleep, her tiny chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm. With a weary sigh, you leaned back against the pillows, holding your daughter close as you closed your eyes, allowing the exhaustion of the day to finally claim you.

You opened your eyes to see Yunho carefully lifting your daughter from your arms, his movements a mix of awkwardness and tenderness. Despite his initial hesitance, there was a determination in the way he cradled her against his chest as if he wanted to make up for any shortcomings. As he tiptoed back into the bedroom, you couldn't help but feel a surge of warmth in your heart. Despite the challenges you faced, seeing Yunho taking care of your daughter for what you believed was the first time, filled you with hope for the future. You listened as Yunho gently placed your daughter in her crib, his voice humming a soft lullaby as he tucked her in. Drifting back to sleep, you were roused once more by Yunho's quiet voice emanating from the bedroom.

"I have so much I want to say to you," he whispered, his voice barely above a hushed murmur. Yunho gazed down at Yunmi, her small form tucked snugly into her crib, her chest rising and falling in the steady rhythm of sleep. ''I'm so sorry for letting you, and your mommy down since day one...'' A sense of awe washed over him as he watched his daughter, the weight of his emotions threatening to overwhelm him. "You're my little starlight, and I'm sorry for not telling you sooner. Yunmi is Daddy's precious, shining light in the darkness." He reached out to gently brush a stray lock of hair from her forehead, his touch feather-light against her soft skin. "Daddy is really so sorry," he continued, his voice thick with emotion. "Sorry for all the times I've been afraid, for all the moments I've missed. I want you to know that I love you more than anything in this world, and I'll do whatever it takes to be the father you deserve." As he spoke, he felt a surge of love and determination welling up inside him, a newfound sense of purpose ignited by the presence of his daughter. In her innocent slumber, he saw the promise of a future filled with endless possibilities, a future that he vowed to protect and nurture with all his heart. "I may not have all the answers, and I will make mistakes along the way," he whispered, his voice trembling with sincerity. "But I promise to always be here for you, to love you unconditionally, and to cherish every moment we share." With a tender smile, he pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead, his lips lingering against her skin for a moment longer. "I love you and Mommy so much. Sleep well, my little starlight," he whispered his voice a soft lullaby that filled the bedroom with warmth and love. "And know that Daddy will always be here, watching over you, every step of the way. From now on Daddy will do his best." As Yunho's words echoed in the quiet of the apartment, you felt a mix of emotions welling up inside you, threatening to overflow. Tears streamed down your face, unnoticed in the darkness, as a tumultuous storm of feelings raged within your heart. Anger simmered beneath the surface, directed not at Yunho, but at yourself. How could you have been so blind to his struggles, so oblivious to the pain he had been carrying? You berated yourself for not recognizing the signs sooner, for not being there for him when he needed you most. But amidst the anger, there was also a profound sense of relief—a weight lifting from your shoulders as you finally understood the depth of Yunho's feelings. For the first time since your daughter was born, you felt truly connected to him, bound together by the shared experience of parenthood and the raw vulnerability of exposing one's innermost fears. And beneath it all, there was love—a love that transcended words and actions, a love that bound you together despite the challenges you faced. Despite the tears and the turmoil, there was a sense of gratitude in knowing that you were not alone—that together, you could weather any storm that came your way.

A little while later, you heard Yunho returning to the living room, his footsteps soft against the floor. A pang of guilt tugged at your heart as you pretended to be asleep, not wanting him to know that you had overheard his heartfelt words to your daughter. You quickly wiped your tears, and kept your breathing slow and steady, willing yourself to remain still as Yunho approached the couch. Soon, his arms enveloped you in a gentle embrace, lifting you bridal-style and carrying you back to your shared bedroom. Settling you onto the bed, he tucked you in with care, ensuring you were comfortable before gently placing the duvet over you. His touch was tender, his actions speaking volumes of his love and devotion. Yunho pressed down a warm kiss to your forehead, his lips lingering for a moment against your skin.

"Y/N, I'm so sorry," he whispered, his voice trembling with emotion against your forehead. "I'm just so scared to be a father," he whispered, his voice barely audible in the stillness of the room. "Scared to hurt her, to make mistakes that she'll never forgive." You felt the weight of his fear pressing down on you, his vulnerability laying bare the depths of his insecurities. With each word, it was as if a window had been opened to his soul, revealing the raw, unfiltered truth of his innermost thoughts and feelings. "I want to be the best father I can be, but... but what if I'm not enough?" His voice cracked with the weight of his uncertainty, his words echoing in the stillness of the room. And then, you felt it—a single tear falling onto your temple, a silent testament to the depth of his pain and fear. In that moment, your heart broke for him, for the struggles he faced and the burdens he carried. "And you," Yunho continued, his voice trembling with emotion, "you've been amazing since day one. I've watched you, seen the way you care for her with such love and devotion. It's like you were born to be a mother, and... and I can't help but feel like I'm falling short." Yunho longed to be the pillar of support you needed, the rock upon which your family could lean in times of trouble. But with each passing day, the weight of his insecurities grew heavier, threatening to crush him beneath their burden. "I'm still so afraid," he admitted, his voice barely a whisper now. "Afraid of letting you down, of letting Yunmi down. But I promise, I'll keep trying. I'll do whatever it takes to be the father she deserves, even if... even if it scares me to my core." In the darkness of the bedroom, his words hung heavy in the air. "I love you so much, Y/N, and I will do better, I will be the support you need." Yunho's voice broke through the silence once again, his words filled with sincerity and remorse.

"And I love you," you finally whispered, your voice filled with tenderness and affection. With a gentle touch, you reached out to wipe away the tears that streaked Yunho's cheeks, your fingers tracing the contours of his face with utmost care.

"You've been awake the entire time?" Yunho's voice broke the silence, his words carrying a mixture of surprise and relief. A shy smile tugged at the corners of his lips, a hint of uncertainty in his gaze as he met your eyes. You returned his smile, the warmth of his presence washing over you like a gentle breeze.

"Yes," you admitted softly, your voice filled with understanding. "I heard everything." There was no judgment in your words, no recrimination for his vulnerability. Instead, there was only acceptance—a shared acknowledgment of the complexities of love and the struggles that came with it. Yunho's smile widened, a sense of gratitude shining in his eyes.

"Thank you for listening," he whispered, his lips placing yet another kiss on your forehead. "And for being here with me." You reached out to him, your hand finding his in the darkness, a silent reassurance of your love and support.

"Always," you whispered, your voice filled with unwavering devotion. "I'll always be here for you, Yunho. Through thick and thin." Yunho creased your cheek gently, his eyes never leaving yours. "And now get under the covers with me," you giggled mischievously, reaching out to pull Yunho close by his neck. With a playful tug, you caught him off guard, pulling him towards you until he landed on top of you with a soft thud. Yunho's eyes widened in surprise, a startled laugh escaping his lips as he found himself sprawled across the bed, his gaze locked with yours.

"You little trickster," he chuckled, his voice filled with amusement as he shifted to settle beside you under the covers. With a grin, you wrapped your arms around him, pulling him close until your bodies were pressed together in a warm embrace. The feel of his warmth against your skin sent a shiver of delight down your spine, a feeling of contentment settling over you like a soft blanket. "I haven't kissed you in forever," Yunho murmured, his voice laced with longing as he gazed into your eyes with a mixture of affection and desire. A soft smile tugged at the corners of your lips, your heart fluttering at the thought of his lips against yours.

"Then what are you waiting for?" you teased as you leaned in closer to him. With a tender touch, Yunho cupped your cheek, his thumb brushing lightly against your skin as he drew you closer to him. And then, with a gentle tilt of his head, his lips met yours in a sweet, lingering kiss. At that moment, as you melted into each other's embrace, time seemed to stand still. The world faded away, leaving only the two of you, lost in the warmth and intimacy of the moment. As you pulled away, breathless and flushed with emotion, you felt a sense of completeness wash over you—a reminder that no matter how long it had been since your last kiss, the love you shared was as strong and passionate as ever. A playful sparkle danced in your eyes as you posed the question, your curiosity piqued by Yunho's endearing nickname for your daughter.

"If she's your starlight, then what does it make me?" you asked, a teasing lilt to your voice as you awaited his response. Yunho's gaze softened as he looked at you, a tender smile gracing his lips.

"You," he said softly, his voice filled with warmth and affection, "you're my guiding light. The one that leads me home, no matter how lost I may feel." Your boyfriend's words washed over you like a gentle caress, filling you with a sense of warmth and love. With a smile of your own, you leaned in closer to him, your heart overflowing with love and gratitude.

"And you," you whispered, pressing a soft kiss to his lips, "you're my everything." And as you melted into each other's embrace, surrounded by the quiet intimacy of the night, you knew that no matter what the future held, as long as you had each other, you could weather any storm that came your way.

The sound of Yunmi's cries pierced through the tranquility of the night, pulling you from the depths of sleep with a jolt. You moved to rise from the bed, instinctively driven to tend to your daughter's needs. But before you could fully untangle yourself from the sheets, Yunho's firm grip on your arm halted your movements.

"I'll get her," he murmured, his voice filled with determination as he gently pulled you back towards the bed. You hesitated for a moment, torn between the instinctual urge to rush to Yunmi's side and the desire to trust Yunho to handle the situation. But as you looked into his eyes, you saw a steely resolve there—a determination to prove himself as a capable dad, despite his fears and insecurities. With a silent nod, you allowed yourself to sink back onto the bed, the warmth of Yunho's presence comforting you as you watched him rise to tend to your daughter. As he crossed the room to Yunmi's crib, you couldn't help but feel a surge of pride welling up within you—a recognition of the strength and courage it took for him to step up and take on the role of caregiver. Yunho took her in his arms, gently and tenderly, almost as if he were afraid that his touch alone might hurt her. He held Yunmi close to his chest, rocking gently from side to side, he tried to calm his daughter, yet Yunho's panic escalated as Yunmi's cries persisted, his worry evident in the trembling of his hands and the furrow of his brow.

"Is she okay?" he asked, his voice tight with anxiety.

"She's probably just hungry," you reassured him gently as you stood up for the bed, understanding the depth of his concern. But before you could offer to nurse her yourself, Yunho's response caught you off guard.

"Oh..." he trailed off, his voice filled with uncertainty. "I can't breastfeed her," he murmured, the realization dawning on him as he grappled with the limitations of his role as a father. You reached out to him, placing a comforting hand on his arm.

"It's okay, baby," you assured him softly. "There are other ways you can help soothe her. We can prepare a bottle together, or you can hold her close while I feed her. What's important is that we're both here for her." Yunho nodded, his eyes reflecting a mixture of relief and gratitude.

"Thank you," Yunho whispered, his voice filled with emotion as he passed Yunmi gently into your arms, his eyes still big with worry. "Should I prepare a bottle for her?" You smiled softly at his eagerness to help, appreciating his willingness to step up despite his initial panic.

"I think I'll just breastfeed her for now," you replied, your voice gentle and reassuring. "But thank you for offering." Yunho nodded, a sense of relief washing over him as he watched you cradle Yunmi close, the familiarity of the bond between mother and daughter bringing him a sense of comfort. As you settled into the comfortable position, you nursed Yunmi, Yunho remained by your side, offering silent support and encouragement. As you nursed Yunmi, the gentle rhythm of her feeding lulled both her and Yunho into a peaceful slumber. The soft sounds of her contented suckling mixed with the steady beat of their breathing, creating a tranquil symphony that filled the room. With Yunmi cradled in your arms and Yunho nestled close beside you, you felt a profound sense of contentment wash over you. The warmth of their bodies against yours, the softness of their breath against your skin—it was a moment of pure serenity, a snapshot of the quiet joy that parenthood brought. You allowed yourself to bask in the tranquility of the moment, relishing the feeling of being surrounded by the ones you loved most in the world. In the soft glow of the morning light, you watched over them with a heart full of love, knowing that in this simple embrace, you had everything you ever needed.

"Be patient with him. He's trying," you whispered to your daughter, the words soft and tender as you gazed down at her sleeping form.

[shaevilux]

People knock on Rhoam for being a bad dad cuz he's distant and stern to little Zelda and say how Rauru is the goat (heh) for taking her in like his own daughter. Like Zelda had her real parental connection with Sonia and Rauru. But frankly that's a little reductive.

Rauru literally descended from the heavens, married a priest, started a kingdom. Man didn't really know much strife yet. There's no looming threat of calamity or prophecy yet. Things are peaceful. Things are fine. Things are great. Zelda dropped in during this time, talking about a doom that's going to happen tens of thousands of years in the future.

This sad, lost princess.

Of course any reasonable person would take her in and calm her and tell her she is fine and listen and support her.

Rhoam not being able to be this kind of figure for Zelda is tragic. Just read this poor man's journal entries:

"It has been a year and three months since her mother passed. Perhaps she is held back by heartache too deep to heal. If the Ganon prophecy wasn't looming over our heads, I would tell her to take her time... To wait until she is ready. But our situation is dire and leaves no room for weakness—even on behalf of my beloved daughter. My heart breaks for Zelda, but I must act as a king, not a father. I must order her to train relentlessly at the fountain." Pg 4.

"In truth, I understand Zelda's feelings. Painfully so. She lost her mother, her teacher, before she could learn from her. Ten pointless years of self-training, without so much as a book or note to help her find her way... Those in the castle talk behind her back. And I, her only family, scold her for her shortcomings. No wonder she wishes to hide away in her beloved relic research. I'd love nothing more than to console her... But I must stay strong. She MUST fulfill her duty, just as we all must. Even if she comes to despise me." Pg 6.

"I have been told my Zelda went to the Spring of Wisdom... This will likely be her last chance. If she is unable to awaken her power at Lanayru, all hope is truly lost. If she comes back without success, then I shall speak kindly with her. Scolding is pointless now. I forced 10 years of training on her... and after all that, it seems her power will stubbornly awaken some other way. Perhaps I should encourage her to keep researching her beloved relics. They may just lead her to answers I can't provide. For now, I sit anxiously, more a father than a king in this moment. I sit and await my daughter's return." Pg 7. (He fucking dies and never gives Zelda this bit of closure uuuugggghhhhhhh Zelda I'm so sorry Rhoam I'm so sorry)

It sucks because most people remember the cutscenes (duh it's more immersive and important) and in the cutscenes of the first game Rhoam was mostly shown as being stern and mean to babygirl Zelda, who is closed fists explaining herself to him at the verge of tears. And in contrast everyone in the first royal family of hyrule in the second game treated her with such kindness and we can see how happy she was being there with them.

Rhoam was shackled by duty. By prophecy. By the looming calamity. And from the day he named his daughter 'Zelda' he shackled her as well.

And what does Zelda do with these shackles? She accepts them. She tolerates them. Because she loves her father and her kingdom and knows there's a power dormant in her that can stop the calamity that she must do her best to unlock. She does this dutifully. She does all the training, she does everything that is required.

But it still doesn't unlock. So she tries other ways. She isn't just going after the 'relics' because she's scholarly and nerdy and wants to learn about them. She does it because she's pragmatic. She knows her sacred sealing power isn't present in her. She knows she might not be able to control it or even unlock it in time.

So she tries this alternative approach. The Divine Beasts, the guardians. Ancient tech that was used to prevent the calamity of their time. And she awakened the tech. And her father chose the champions for each divine beast. And they were all prepared. And it's all thanks to Zelda.

And then... Fucking tragedy again. Ganon probably learned his lesson from the last time he was thwarted and immediately went for the tech, corrupting it and turning it against the new users. Against Zelda.

It's never really stated how fast it all turned to shit when the tech betrayed them (or maybe I don't remember) but every account points to it being almost overnight. The champions died. Rhoam died. And suddenly, suddenly Zelda unlocks her sealing magic.

I always always hate the literary trope of using tragedy to unlock a great power that could've actually stopped the tragedy from happening in the first place.

And it's no different in BOTW. I hate that Zelda had to go through all this to unlock her powers.

And then what happens next?

She's stuck in limbo (in an almost mocking parallel to Rauru in the next game with his imprisoning arm) holding Ganon back. For a hundred years.

This young woman had gone through so much only to be trapped with a calamity seeking to destroy Hyrule for a century.

Does she know her father died in the war? Does she know the champions died in battle? Would she know Link would survive in the Shrine of Resurrection? Would she know how long it would all take? The century she would have to wait?

I think she didn't. I think it all happened too fast. I think ultimately, she decided a stalemate with ganon was an agreeable outcome. I think in her mind she probably thought she failed Hyrule. When the divine beasts turned she must have been distraught. Distraught might not even cover it tbh. But at least... At least when the kingdom was brought to it's knees by the corrupted tech and was waiting for the final blow, she had the ability to ensure the final blow never came.

And oh boy I have a looot more to talk about regarding Tears of the Kingdom. But I do want to have a couple of more playthroughs of it to really formulate what I want to say.

[omelaslost]

Bedding Ceremony Pt. 2

•───────•°•❀•°•❀•°•❀•°•───────•

Prompt: How they act during their bedding ceremony and the events leading up to it.

Characters: Jacaerys Velaryon, Daemon Targaryen, Cregan Stark

| Part 1 | Part 2 |

•───────•°•❀•°•❀•°•❀•°•───────•

Jacaerys Velaryon

✿ Out of most of the characters, Jace is the most likely to immediately take your feelings into consideration if you express nervousness regardless of your relationship with him before the wedding.

✿ As his mother’s heir to the Iron Throne, Jacaerys feels a lot of pressure to behave in a certain way in most situations, and seeing as your marriage would likely be in some way political regardless of how he might feel for you, he would feel that weight on his shoulders to present himself as the perfect heir during the entire wedding, including the ceremony.

✿ Jace feels the need to overcompensate for his perceived shortcomings, and that need to be perceived as a worthy heir follows him and is sprinkled into almost every action he takes.

✿ His attention would be on you throughout the feast, aside from the expected courtesies he owed those in attendance.

✿ His actions involving you would come naturally to him though, not simply because they were expected of him. As you shared a plate, he would feed you with his dagger, hold your cup up to your lips when you drank, gently dab your chin with a cloth after you finished eating something. For every dance he shared with someone else, he would be sure to share another with you. You were his wife now after all.

✿ He would check in on you constantly throughout the feast, making sure that things were going well and that you were enjoying yourself. You would have to remind him that it was his wedding as well and that he should also perhaps try to relax a bit. He would protest, saying that he was relaxed, but he would be lying because he was anything but relaxed.

✿ He would be enjoying his time with you, happy that the two of you were married, but the expectations he feels would be weighing him down and stressing him out, though, at your coaxing, he would try to lighten up a bit.

✿ He would likely notice immediately if you seemed nervous or uncomfortable, and he would immediately set out on comforting you. If you said that you did not want to proceed with the ceremony aspect of the bedding, it would be met with nothing but understanding on his part.

✿ There would be a silent moment of contemplation because he does know what is expected of the both of you, but he would ultimately choose your comfort over tradition. You would only have to say it once and it would be handled. Though he knows some may raise a brow at his decision, he would not go against his wife’s wishes on such a delicate matter.

✿ When the time came, he would simply yet politely state that the two of you have decided not to proceed with the ceremony and that the bedding between him and his beloved would be kept private.

✿ Though, of course, if you were not nervous about the ceremony and what it entailed, he would allow things to proceed as intended, though he himself would likely feel slightly nervous. He would hide it well enough because he must, though to those who looked closely, it would still be slightly noticeable.

✿ Despite himself, he would get flustered once the ceremony began. He would try to remain outwardly calm, but his pink cheeks would absolutely give him away.

✿ The ceremony would make him uncomfortable, and he would not enjoy being undressed for all to see and he would enjoy you being undressed by a group of men even less. Try as he might to keep his expression lighthearted, he cannot even keep it neutral. His displeasure would seep into his entire demeanor, there for those with eyes to see it. His jaw would be clenched, his posture stiff despite being undressed, and he'd keep his eyes towards you. He just wants it to be over as quickly as possible so he can be alone with you.

✿ He would feel protective of you once the jokes started pouring in. He understands that this is the way of things, that it is tradition, but he would not stand to see you humiliated and would not hesitate to rebuke some of the more offensive “jokes” directed toward you. You were to be his queen one day, and he would not see you shamed by those you would help him rule.

✿ He would try to hold his tongue, but it would come with great difficulty, and he would fail. After the first few reprimands, the jokes from your drunken guests would suddenly become very tame and even respectful (at least by Westerosi standards).

✿ When the two of you are finally placed upon the bed in your bridal chambers, the door shutting behind the last of your guests and leaving the two of you alone, he would finally allow himself a sigh of relief.

✿ If the two of you have known each other for an extended period of time and there is a fondness shared between you, he might allow himself to finally quietly confide in you about the stress the day had brought before actually proceeding with the bedding. He would want that moment and the bedding to be dictated by the fondness that he has for you, not duty for once.

✿ Given Jace’s cautious reprimands while the two of you were being carried through the halls, even the shouts and suggestions through the door would be more tame than what you would find at most weddings. Though there may be a guest or two more drunken than the rest that might still make themselves heard.

✿ Once again, his focus would mainly be on you, and he would be trying to draw your focus from the embarrassing shouts just out the door. He would be inexperienced, but he would be paying close attention to how you react to his kisses, to his caresses, and he would make sure you’re properly prepared before penetrating you.

✿ “Do you want me to make them stop?” He would murmur against your neck, pressing another kiss there if he noticed you glancing at the door, “I can make them go away.”

✿ He’d be whispering sweet words to you as he prepared you, his fingers exploring your body. “You’re so beautiful,” He’d whisper, his fingers gliding up your inner thigh, dipping into your folds, smiling if you gasped, “Does that feel good?”

Daemon Targaryen

✿ Daemon’s attitude towards the bedding, as well as whether he even cares about your feelings towards it, depends entirely on if he actually likes you or not.

✿ If he was forced into the betrothal and found no fondness for you, he would simply forgo the bedding, whether you wanted the ceremony or not. He would not even consult you; he would just announce that the bedding ceremony would not be happening and that was that. He doesn’t care what the guests in attendance think. He may have had to marry you, but they can’t force him to make a show out of bedding you.

✿ He genuinely would not even attempt to hide his displeasure at his own wedding, and why should he? It was a farce.

✿ And if he really didn’t want to, he wouldn’t bed you. He was sure you didn’t want to bed him either, though he didn’t necessarily care one way or the other. If you didn’t care for him either, the two of you could at least have an understanding of disinterest. He thinks himself more the prize, however.

✿ If the betrothal was forced on him but he did hold some fondness towards you, he’d be slightly more likely to take your feelings into consideration. He wouldn’t completely disregard you, at least. In the sense that he’s still likely to forgo the bedding ceremony, but there would be a flicker of a thought that the ceremony would make you uncomfortable while he was doing it.

✿ Now if he actually cares for you and was wedding you of his own volition, he would be slightly more festive.

✿ Throughout the feast, he would mingle with those he actually likes while trying to remain civil with those he does not (teetering on the edge of civility while mixing in what discourtesy he can get away with). He would share his food and cup with you, and he would likely make jests with you about some of those in attendance. He might joke with you about how ridiculous the whole ceremony is if you are not comfortable with it.

✿ If you expressed discomfort at the idea of the ceremony, it would not even be a question to him to forgo it. When the time came he would make known with the minimum amount of tact necessary that you both were choosing not to go through with the ceremony. If you were more reserved about expressing your discomfort, he would make up for it tenfold.

✿ If you were fine with proceeding with the bedding ceremony then he would not offer any protests. Daemon is likely indifferent towards the ceremony in and of itself and would likely just go with whatever you're most comfortable with. No matter what, he gets to bed you at the end anyway.

✿ There would definitely be people that Daemon is alright with undressing you during the ceremony and people that he is not alright with undressing you and that is entirely because he does not like them and does not want them touching you. He is not above finding some way to make sure they were incapacitated when the time for the bedding came, either by having them served Strongwine so they were passed out drunk by the time the ceremony began or by some other method.  

✿ Daemon would enjoy the ceremony to a degree despite his general indifference towards the tradition itself. He would enjoy being undressed by the women in attendance though his attention would still mainly be on you as you’re being undressed and carried by the men.

✿ He would almost critique the jokes that are thrown both your way? This diva...

✿ “Ah yes, how original,” He would respond laconically whenever anyone’s jokes included a dragon, a dragonpit, or cave, perhaps even rolling his eyes a bit. He would glance towards you as the two of you were being undressed just to monitor how you were holding up.

✿ Now if someone tossed in a unique joke, that might get a laugh out of him or at least a chuckle. He would appreciate the creativity.

✿ Once you’re both bundled up on the bed, he would be fairly quick in sending everyone away.

✿ “You can all take your leave now, thank you,” he would speak in a dry tone, dismissing your guests with a glance.

✿ He would definitely find some of the suggestions flying through the door amusing and laugh about them with you, though I do think he would eventually send your guests away entirely. It is your wedding, and he would want to focus more on you rather than the obscenities being thrown in through the door.

✿ He’d been waiting to get you alone, and now that you finally are, he’s taking full advantage of it. He’d still let you get a say on whether you want to send them away or not, though he’d likely go about it in a cruder fashion.

✿ “Do you wish for our guests to hear me fuck you or should I send them away?” He would ask, his hand raising to allow his fingers to trail down your neck to your collarbone. He would tilt his head, a small smirk on his face.

✿ Regardless of how you answer, he wants to make you feel good. If you agreed to send them away, perhaps he would still make it his goal to make it so they can still hear you.

Cregan Stark

[NOTE: So, I’m slightly unsure if the bedding ceremony is the same in the North as it is practiced under the Seven since the only Northern wedding I can think of that we’ve seen is between Ramsay and Jeyne (or Sansa in the show). I know there is a bedding and there are typically witnesses, so I am going to write it fairly similar or we can pretend that you’re from the South.]

✿ Cregan would be familiar with the bedding ceremony seeing as he had been married once before.

✿ Out of the three, Cregan is the most likely to do things expressly by the book with little room to deviancy, but he would still hold an intense level of protectiveness over you all the same. Even if it was not a love match and simply a marriage pact for an alliance between your two houses, Cregan takes his oaths very seriously. When he placed his cloak over your shoulders to take you under his protection, he took you under his protection.

✿ He’s blunt and stern, but he isn’t cruel. If you’re unfamiliar with him, he might come off as almost indifferent, which wouldn’t be out of place in an arranged marriage, but you're his wife now, and he does care for you and believes that love will grow between the two of you with time.

✿ During the feast, he would sit with you and share his plate with you. If you were not from the North, he would likely use this time to tell you more about his home, wanting you to be prepared for what was to come. He would be very honest with you.

✿ “Our winters are harsh,” he would start, detailing how harsh their winters were, certain customs, the worship of the old gods (you would likely have been married in Winterfell’s godswood), and perhaps what to expect as his wife, finishing with, “But it is home. We are a proud people. And it will be your home now, too.”

✿ Granted, if you were from the North, he wouldn’t need to tell you any of this.

✿ If he noticed that you seemed nervous leading up to the ceremony, he would ask you if everything is alright, though he would already have an idea of what was bothering you. You were a bride about to be exposed to the lords and ladies in attendance; he did not doubt you were nervous about that. Asking was more of a formality, giving you a chance to be honest about your feelings if you wished.

✿ Cregan might give a light bit of pushback if you expressed the desire to forgo the bedding ceremony if just to see how you would respond to it. He would like to see you stand up for yourself a bit if you truly were uncomfortable. And if the two of you did not have a long betrothal, he would do this to get a feel of how you might respond to his pushback. He wants to know what kind of woman his new wife is.

✿ He would remind you that the bedding ceremony is an old tradition practiced throughout the Seven Kingdoms and a part of wedding someone. He would add that many would say you agreed to it when you were betrothed to him. He gauges your reaction to this, and if you relent, he’ll feel a twinge of disappointment as well as a bit of guilt. He had expected you to challenge him a bit.

✿ Now if you didn’t relent and repeated that you did not want to go through with the ceremony and made it clear that you would rather consummate the marriage privately, you would earn furrowed brows followed by a small, rare smile from him.

✿ If you truly, truly did not want to go through with it, he would relent and choose to omit the ceremony from your wedding. It would be a simple declaration and no one would question him on it. The way he sees it, ultimately, the sheets will speak for themselves.

✿ If you don’t express any discomfort or nervousness or any of that, Cregan likely would not think twice about proceeding with the ceremony as planned.

✿ He would likely have a relatively stoic outlook once the ceremony began, simply just accepting it as it is. He would not react much to the women grabbing at his clothes, allowing them to pull them off of him and moving his arms and legs to make it easier for them. He lets them guide him, his expression not giving much away to what he might be thinking.

✿ He’d keep a close eye on the men; however, making sure no one took any liberties with his wife. He’d be quick to tell anyone off if their hands lingered too long while undressing you or if he deemed their touch too rough.

✿ Outside of the corner of his lips twitching at some of the jests the guests made and maybe a chuckle if he found one particularly amusing, he wouldn’t be too expressive on the walk to the bridal chambers.

✿ I feel as though most of the jests made would be hinting towards what position you might find yourself in tonight, joking about the Stark direwolf and how you might need to get used to being on your hands and knees.

✿ Cregan would love the sight of you bundled up on the furs and as he met you on the bed, his hand would immediately splay out on the small of your back as he waited for the guests to leave the two of you alone so he could pull you closer.

✿ He completely tunes everyone outside the room out and focuses entirely on you. In the privacy of your bridal chambers, he’d be a lot more handsy, though he would pay close attention to your expressions to make sure he was not hurting you or making you uncomfortable.

✿ His large hand would cup your breast as he kissed you, the other one pulling you closer and holding you against him. He would try to be gentle with you, but he is naturally kind of rough-handed.

✿ He would know to make sure you were prepared to take him, using his fingers to stretch you, swallowing your moans before trailing kisses down your neck, nipping at your shoulder.

✿ If the shouts and suggestions bled through the door, he would nip at your neck again, determined to steal your attention away from them. “Ignore them,” he’d whisper in your ear gruffly, “You’ll be drowning them out before the night is done.”

✿ He’d be very determined to make good on those words. He won’t let you make him a liar.

✿ Again, Cregan isn’t a gentle lover (though the effort would be made), though he would be sure to ask if you were ready before pushing himself inside of you. He would relish in your warmth, his hands holding tight to your waist, intent on making you cry out once you adjusted to the feeling of him inside you.

[driftward]

Let's talk about Zoraal Ja.

So early on in Dawntrail, shortly after Krile's first Echo off of Zoraal Ja, I was like, we are going to find out there is something fucked up happening to this guy. Maybe there's actually an Ascian in there purposefully fucking things up, or whoever the big bad of the expansion turns out to be rewired his head somehow, or, you know, some flavour of brain fuckery.

But as we go through the story and ultimately see him at his defeat, no, nothing so extreme as all that. He seems to be just Like That, and I thought it odd. By all accounts, it seemed he must have been raised okay. Gulool Ja Ja seems to have been an alright father figure, good enough to have raised two other kids into decent adults. They have their own sets of issues, but nobody's perfect, and they both do a good job course correcting for their shortcomings.

What the hell happened with Zoraal Ja? Why did he turn out the way he did?

Gulool Ja Ja is a blessed sibling, which we are not just told are exceedingly rare - we are shown so, explicitly, and we learn what the cost of a blessed sibling is to the Mamool Ja. A cost that their people bore in order to try to better their lot and win a war against the Xbr'aal. Gulool Ja Ja did not so much win their war as much as he simply ended it, bringing peace to both peoples.

That peace is simply, however, not that old. When we visit Iq Br'aax, we slowly learn the story of how that peace came to be, but throughout it, I could not help but notice that we were only getting one side of the story. The celebrated meal of Xibruq Pibil was meant to be a symbol of bringing peoples who were historically enemies together, but where were the Mamool Ja to share it with? And why did none of the Mamool Ja present seem to know how to create the recipe?

There is a peace, but here we see that it is a flawed peace. In the side quests, you learn that trade happens between the Mamool Ja and the Xbr'aal, but only in secret. The younger generation knows peace, but the older generation is still cagey about the not all that distant history with their neighbors in the forest.

And so the Mamool Ja still continue their practice of enduring the terrible loss of so many stillbirths in an attempt to create more blessed siblings. Their culture, especially the remnant that chooses to remain in the forest, is still trying to make its place in the larger world and improve their lot. They are still living in a land that makes for harsh conditions for living.

And in this we see a few things. One, Gulool Ja Ja is not perfect. He did a good job, but not a great one. The work of peace is going to need to be an ongoing project. And two, I believe it sets the foundation for why Zoraal Ja is the way he is.

He was not raised in Mamook, but he is still Mamool Ja. And like Gulool Ja Ja, he is a miracle. The trueblood son of a blessed sibling, who were long believed to be sterile. We don't know anything about his mother, and I suspect she had little influence on his life. But judging from the way the fight against him goes, and the visions we see of the people in his life, he may not have had a mother, singular, but I think he definitely had nursemaids.

And they certainly remembered what life was like in Mamook. And that history is not so old. And so early on, he is told he is special. He is told he is destined for great things. And probably, at least a little bit, there are whispers of how he might surpass his father one day.

The seed of a terrible imposter syndrome is planted.

And none of what happens requires Gulool Ja Ja to be a bad parent. In fact, I think what we get is the result of him trying to be a good parent. It seems likely he probably met his kids where they were at, encouraged their interests, and let them be who they wanted to be. Wuk Lamat probably sparred with him, and certainly got his sociable, outgoing tendencies. Koana, quiet Koana, I like to imagine he expressed an interest in sciences, and knowledge, and Gulool Ja Ja probably made sure he had the best tutors, and when the time came, made sure he had a good send off to Old Sharlayan.

And quiet, taciturn Zoraal Ja who rarely speaks. I can imagine Gulool Ja Ja let his son keep his peace. He probably assumed his son wanted his space, and left him to it. And Zoraal Ja, the miracle, watched his father. His father's living accomplishment was peace in Tural. Zoraal Ja will bring peace to the entire star. Gulool Ja Ja loves a good fight, enough that he challenges people to come to the palace and face him. Zoraal Ja will be a better fighter than his father. Gulool Ja Ja was a leader. Zoraal Ja is the leader of the Landsguard, and will succeed his father as Dawnservant.

It's interesting, I think, to compare and contrast Zoraal Ja with Bakool Ja Ja, who are more alike than they are different. Both are miracle children, both are impossible children. The Mamool Ja thought that a child born of Hoobigo and Boonewa was impossible - until the birth of the first blessed sibling. And they also believed a blessed sibling, in turn, was sterile - until the birth of Zoraal Ja, the miracle.

And both of them, I think, are carrying the weight of their people with them. Bakool Ja Ja explicitly, but I don't think Zoraal Ja got to escape it just because he was raised in Tuliyollal instead of Mamook. Even if the aforementioned nursemaids did not explicitly put the idea in his head that he might be the future of the Mamool Ja, he is not an idiot. They definitely told him he was a miracle, destined for great things.

And absent guidance from his father, who probably just wanted him to be his own person, he decided for himself what those great things would be.

Zoraal Ja is intent on completing them alone - to his ultimate detriment, in the trial in Mamook.

And while they are so very similar, the difference between Bakool Ja Ja and Zoraal Ja is that Bakool Ja Ja not only never wanted this, but he was eventually offered a path out. A way to be free of the yoke of the responsibilities his culture put upon him before he was ever even born. But Zoraal Ja never got that chance, because his burdens were not being forced upon him. He took them upon himself.

And he carried them until his death.

In the end, Gulool Ja Ja was probably a decent father, but not the right kind of father for Zoraal Ja. Zoraal Ja's ambition was born of a terrible inferiority complex that he nursed until it festered and swallowed him whole. He could have found his own freedom, but he could not see it past the shadow of his own father, who he was obsessed with eclipsing.

And so we're left with this. Zoraal Ja died in a completely avoidable tragedy of his own making.

[yuellii]

catching floating clouds ( i’m in stupid love )

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐓𝐔𝐃𝐘 ;; the heart-stopping, stomach-twisting, gut-wrenching way in which they fall hopelessly in love with you

feat. neuvillette, ayato, baizhu, kaveh ( separately )

notes. gn reader, heavily inspired by @miyosei who you should check out bc she is much better at this than i am, really felt like thinking about my favorite genshin men

NEUVILLETTE falls in love like fresh springtime.

There’s a certain silence in the air that catches his breath, one that forces him to breath in so deeply, he might as well consider himself human. It’s new, like a flower bloom in the spring where the air is crisp and the mornings are tranquil.

He takes notice of it, of course. It was impossible not to when the mere thought of you swarmed his head in instances he needed it most. Amidst expense reports, amidst case filing—you more often than not somehow make your way back into his head. And despite such shortcomings creating an imbalance in his work life, he can’t seem to hate it.

Perhaps he’s fallen ill, or perhaps there was something in the air as of late that has him feeling all sorts of things. Because this feeling was all so fresh, so new, he might’ve sought for it.

Your touch is akin to the end of summertime, when days are hazy and he finds a moment of relaxation. Your voice is a serenity like harp strings attached to his heart; and for once, he feels human.

And suddenly, he begins to notice the simpler things in life that he hadn’t noticed before. Fontaine waters have never smelled so fresh since before he fell in love with you, nor did the evening clouds ever looks so ethereal. These emotions you gave him were a gift from the Gods, showering him in the blessings and beauty of human life. And at the center of it all, it was you, the one who made him human.

KAMISATO AYATO falls in love in hesitance.

You prove to be difficult to get out of his head. He’s frustrated, he’s furious, and he’s fallen so fully in love.

There’s a tinge of stress that comes with the realization, like you’re another item of baggage to add onto his already-tired shoulders; another piece of food dropped onto his full plate, but he somehow hates himself for comparing you to such burdening analogies. You didn’t deserve that.

He likes you. He wishes he didn’t.

Only despondency clogs the air when he thinks of you, late-night thoughts in the dim glow of his office as he twirls his pen between his fingers. His hand movements are the only thing stable right now, for his mind was in disorderly disarray at the shambles of his emotions. Gods, he was in love with you. He had so much work to finish, but he was in love with you. He wanted to stop thinking, but he was in love with you.

He feels sick, like the lack of sleep from nights he went overthinking his future made him close to throwing up. Or like the mere imagination of you coming in to save him from this workload made him sickeningly nauseous.

He couldn’t work like this. No, not when your clouded his thoughts like he was some lovesick fool.

And he was—he knew he was a fool. But when you’ve damned him just from making him fall in love like this… he fears he has to shut you out.

BAIZHU falls in love in the present time.

He is a man of the future, a man that has his entire life set out, from his plans to obtain the grace of immortality and thereafter. When he falls in love with you, it’s a sudden obsession that has him craving the thought of you for weeks. It affects his life, his plans, his work—it forces him to live in the present time where he was still weak, still mortal.

He can’t help but sit there, staring down at his table in a wide-awake agony that eats at his ambitions. It’s not that he’s never felt this kind of love. It’s that he’s never allowed himself the chance to, not once since he made this contract.

He loves Qiqi like family, he loves that he can take care of her; he hates how he can’t do the same with you.

And he hates how you force him to live in the present, the way you cloud his head with thoughts of a future he had not considered. His future never included you in the picture, it never involved living with another human so fragile like himself. This vision did not include a lover that would age so quickly after he himself achieved immortality.

But he can’t help it, not when the mere imagination of living and dying by your side sounded like a love he was suddenly hoping for. He only wishes he could have both lives at once.

KAVEH falls in love like dancing petals.

For a person so human and so gorgeous like you, how could he not? He’s always romanticized the reiterating idea of romance, for it was one of the beauties that human life had to offer. When flowers dared to fade, there was still hope for love.

And when he found that love in you, it was like a breath of the summer solstice. It felt like the longest day of the year, yet simultaneously the brightest. Smiling with joy that reached up to the corners of his eyes, that fluttering feeling flew across his body so long as he was in love.

From there on, every time he speaks to you is akin to a whisper of collective creative minds. They tell him how perfect you are, and it makes him distracted. He begins to admire you like he admires architecture—staring and learning every little detail until all of you is etched into his brain. He’ll start to remember every little detail you offer to him; it’s endearing in a way that’s purely natural.

Genuine, unadulterated feelings of admiration—that was how he continues to fall in love over and over again. Love is beauty, beauty is love, and when you smile at him, it’s so beautiful he swears his heart collapses every time. And when he doesn’t leave you alone, always sacrificing the time just to see you, your welcoming laughter will always be his favorite song.

All life was an art piece in his eyes; you were the most beautiful one, and he would gladly take you as one of his painters.

all inspirational credits to sunny the loml again bc i even referenced her with the title 🫶

[rosetinteddrms]

01. please be kind. 02. this is a creative outlet, i do not take money. 03. never use my services as a replacement for professional help. 04. this is for entertainment purposes only. 05. take a deep breath and pick the pile you are drawn to. 06. take only what resonates. 07. you are loved.

masterlist | send in asks through my inbox ･ * . ･ ࿓

if you are dreaming of pile one ･ * . ･ ࿓

intuitive reading

you may have a yellow aura. you remind me of someone who tries to see the brightest in others, you are very optimistic, free-spirited, and light up any room you're in. you bring a lot of attention to yourself (good or bad) just based on your energy and the way you hold yourself. you may only be known for your bubbly personality that may come off as ditzy sometimes, but you may actually value intellectual pursuits. you may truly find comfort in relationships where you can talk for hours on hours about the oddest of things. you may tend to see people for who they truly are rather than who they present themselves as. however, this authenticity is may be something you don't often receive from others, leaving you tired and drained.

eight of wands, five of pentacles rx

pile one, you seem to have a duality about you. on the outside, you're very passionate, driven, and confident. on the inside, you may just want what is best for yourself. you might fear isolation, loneliness, or estrangement from your ideal self. you may tend to keep these things hidden. you take lots of care to ensure that this side of you stays hidden from the outside world so that it doesn't hinder your progress from your true self, or true aura. you embrace your shortcomings in the shadows so that the world can have the best, bubbliest, truest version of you. this is how you stay true to your yellow aura and is how you continue to stay focused, driven, and confident.

queen of pentacles, knight of cups

even with all the beautiful things about you, pile one, you must be careful to not guard yourself too much. you have so much joy, and laughter, and happiness to spread with the world that when you hunker down inside, you may fail to look at all the blessings you already have. this may cause you to excessively daydream or go off into different worlds about all that you could be and all that you have yet to accomplish. this may taint the pure, yellow aura you've built up. stay grounded and appreciative, and all the joy you've put out into the world will come back to you. please like and rb if anything resonates ･ * . ･ ࿓

if you are dreaming of pile two ･ * . ･ ࿓

intuitive reading

you may have a teal aura. you may be very compassionate and empathetic, and sensitive, but you are not timid. you definitely have a cool but energetic vibe to you. you may be nonchalant but fun. you could also be the therapist friend that everyone goes to for venting, or ranting, or some form of emotional healing. furthermore, pile two, you may be available to others, but due to the blue tint to your aura, you're never desperate for attention or validation. the cool quality from the blue hue and the healing quality from the green hue of your aura may attract very needy individuals. so, for your mental and emotional stability: please be wary of energy vampires.

the devil, king of wands

you may facilitate a lot of shadow work for other people. so much so, that you may neglect yourself. you right now may be battling with some much inner turmoil, you may have a lot of desires that you keep hidden so you can uphold that king of wands image. for right now, this is working, everyone sees you as steadfast, calm, collected, confident, but this facade may break in the near future. you were able to uphold this image because you shoved everything inside. for extra confirmation, this may have some truth in it if: you may need to re-evaluate your social circle because they may be bad influences. you may need to release some persons in your life to truly tap into your calm, collected, teal aura. you may also need to set stronger boundaries with others because they may see you as chill so they may be taking advantage of you. this may be adding to your inner turmoil. i'm really concerned for you, pile two, because this section was supposed to be about everything you're doing right, but right now i'm getting really anxious for you. i think in order for you to truly tap into the cohesiveness of your aura, you may need to do some purging in all aspects of your life. please stay safe.

i will not be doing a third paragraph for this section due to the messages and anxiety from above. please look into the people you are being surrounded by and their true natures. omg pile two, i went to go put up my deck to do the next pile's readings and my cards flew out of my hand and went everywhere. the five of swords, four of cups, and judgement all came out upright. i think for those of you who are in a tense situation, it may 'blow up' soon if you don't cut your losses and make a decision. this may also be a sign that this situation you're in, whatever it is, it may not be resolved quickly or easily and if you try to ignore it. and if left alone long enough, it may result in something horrific coming to the surface.

please like and rb if anything resonates ･ * . ･ ࿓

if you are dreaming of pile three ･ * . ･ ࿓

intuitive reading

you may have a light blue aura. this may mean you are very communicative, intuitive, and have high levels of creativity. you ebb and flow on the river of life, but this may cause you to lack boundaries because of how you hate going against the current. you may have a wounded inner child and struggle with your shadow side. you have a very strong intuition, but you may not always listen to it. this may have led to you being in unhealthy relationships. you may strive to help other people, but try not to give parts of yourself away in order to make other people's wishes come true.

the high priestess, the chariot rx

pile three you may be very good at standing on business. you may listen to your intuition very well and very often, leaving your guides to be very pleased with you. you may have had a smooth sailing in most aspects of your life for the time being. this may have led you to be complacent and kind of wishy washy when it comes to listening to your guides. maybe all the shadow work you've done has slowly begun to be chipped away at. however, you still have a high amount of self-discipline in the face of opposition. you're conscious of your your inner child being triggered or upset and may be actively trying to combat it in the face of whatever challenges you're currently going through. good job pile three, but still make sure to branch out to the people around you and get support from them too. your guides are in the spiritual realm, so there is only so much guidance that they can give you. your connections are in the physical realm, so lean on them and gather the support you need to rebuild yourself.

strength rx, ten of cups

i set my cards to shuffle again before doing this section and while i was writing the top section, the nine of swords popped out. you may have a deep seated anxiety about your future, your stability, or the ability to rely on the people around you. you may be hyper-independent and created too much inner strength to point where intimacy or developing close relationships spooks you. this anxiety regarding relationships is different from person to person, but you may have developed an un grounded fear of closeness. this may create blockages between you and your guides and the people around you. if you feel isolated right now, all you may need to do is reach out and listen. this could be to your guides or connections. after you calm this turmoil and soothe your inner child, you might finally settle into your light blue aura. please like and rb if anything resonates ･ * . ･ ࿓

if you are dreaming of pile four ･ * . ･ ࿓

intuitive reading

you may have a pink aura. you may be a very loving, caring, and sensitive individual who is not swayed easily by other people's thoughts and feelings. this specific light pink is connected closer to red, so you may be very passionate, fierce, and loyal. you are strong but still feminine and playful. you seem to be very secure in yourself, your boundaries, and you may have done lots of shadow work to get yourself here. you are simply bursting with energy, love, and kindness. continue doing what you're doing pile four, it's working.

four of pentacles rx, six of cups rx

pile four, you are doing a great job of protecting your energy and aura. this may seem counterintuitive with the cards pulled but i think that your self-preservation is justified. you see, feminine energy (especially light pink auras) are very rare and difficult to come by. they take an immense amount of love and care and kindness to maintain and develop. so i think you're simply protecting your peace, your innocence, your playfulness. you're reserving your feminine energy for those who truly deserve it. and what's even better is that you're grounded enough to know when your acts of self-preservation are too much because you're so in-tune with yourself due to previous shadow-work. still, you may make mistakes and close yourself off from the wrong person or open up too late, but at the end of the day, you've learned your mistake from past, traumatic connections. you may have been without toxic people for a while now, so your methods are succeeding. but even with all this praise, try not to be too critical of others and try to live in the moment instead of using retroactive pattern-recognition to decipher whether someone is good for you.

the magician rx, three of wands rx

like i said above, pile four, you may be stuck in the past which causes you to miss out on experiencing amazing people due to your need for excessive foresight. you cannot predict the future, nor can you know everything about a person within ten seconds of meeting them. just let things flow naturally and distance yourself whenever alarm bells start ringing. also, keep in mind you have your guides watching over you. you will be safe. just try and tap into that light, playful, feminine energy and slow down your thought whenever you feel like you're closing yourself off again or being overly judgmental. this may help you maintain your gorgeous, pink aura. please like and rb if anything resonates ･ * . ･ ࿓

all rights reserved for @rosetinteddrms © do not copy, translate, alter or reproduce anything on this tumblr page without my consent

[nodusomnis]

title: screened affections pairing(s): itoshi sae x gn!reader word count: 2.5k+ synopsis: watching a somber film won't halt your tears' flow, and you'd rather your swollen eyes remain unseen to him, you know.

As the sun danced high in the sky, casting a warm glow upon the world, Sae's day unfolded in the typical rhythm of his routine. The morning had seen him through his training sessions, the sweat glistening on his skin as he pushed himself to his limits on the field. With the midday sun now reigning supreme, Sae found himself in the quiet interlude between tasks, a time when he could steal a moment to himself.

But in this moment of respite, his thoughts wandered to you. Across the miles that separated you, he wondered about your day, your activities, your thoughts. His phone lay nearby, a silent sentinel waiting for any sign of your presence. It had been hours since he last heard from you, since your message had danced onto his screen, promising an evening of entertainment, of shared moments even in the distance.

Yet, as the minutes stretched into hours, a flicker of impatience began to gnaw at him. Why hadn't you responded? Had something come up? Was the movie captivating you to the point of forgetfulness? Sae shook his head, knowing he shouldn't let such trivialities bother him. You had your own life, your own rhythms, just as he did. And yet, despite this rationalization, a sense of unease lingered.

With a sigh, he glanced at his phone once more, hoping to find a new message waiting for him, a sign that you were still there, still thinking of him amidst the distractions of the day. But the screen remained stubbornly blank, devoid of any new notifications.

Still, Sae persisted in his patience, knowing that you deserved the same understanding that you had always shown him. Despite his own shortcomings, despite the times he had kept you waiting, you had always greeted him with warmth and affection, your smile a beacon of light even in the darkest of moments.

Sae's thoughts swirled with a mixture of gratitude and guilt as he reflected on the dynamics of your relationship. He couldn't help but acknowledge the asymmetry in your efforts, the way you consistently showed understanding and patience even in the face of his shortcomings. It weighed heavily on him, this awareness of his own failings juxtaposed against your unwavering support.

The distance between you, both physical and emotional, seemed to amplify the complexities of your connection. Each day brought its own challenges, its own moments of doubt and longing. Sae couldn't deny the pang of loneliness that occasionally gripped his heart, the ache for your touch, your presence, so far beyond his reach.

Yet, amidst the distance and the doubts, there was a profound sense of appreciation that blossomed within him. He cherished the moments of connection, however fleeting they might be, the messages exchanged, the gifts given, the shared laughter and dreams that transcended the miles between you. It was these small gestures, these tokens of affection, that served as lifelines in the vast expanse of your separation.

But alongside this appreciation lurked the shadow of insecurity, the fear that one day you might tire of his flaws, his inconsistencies, and choose to walk away.Indeed, Sae embodies traits of coldness, indifference, and rudeness. Were he in your shoes, he would likely grow weary of his own demeanor as well. It was a thought he couldn't shake, a whisper of doubt that haunted his mind in moments of solitude. 

Yet, even as this fear plagued him, Sae found comfort in the knowledge that you had chosen to stay, to weather the storms of his temperament with grace and understanding. He knew he didn't deserve you, didn't deserve the way you loved him despite his faults. And yet, there you were, a light in the darkness, a reminder of the goodness that still existed in the world.

With a heavy heart, Sae made a silent vow to do better, to be more present, more attentive, more deserving of the love you so freely gave. For in you, he found not only a partner, but a mirror reflecting back the best parts of himself, urging him to strive for greater heights, to be worthy of the love he had been blessed with. And for that, he would be eternally grateful.

As Sae's thoughts swirled in the quiet of his surroundings, the sudden ping of a notification jarred him from his reverie. With a quick glance at his phone, he felt a wave of relief wash over him as he saw your name illuminated on the screen. Despite his outward calm, a spark of anticipation flickered within him, eager to see what message awaited him from you after hours of silence.

You: I've finished watching the movie. I have a favor to ask. Could we refrain from calling at this time?

As Sae read your message, a sense of displeasure crept over him, overshadowing the relief of finally hearing from you. Your request to postpone the call raised red flags in his mind, triggering a subtle but concrete sense of suspicion.

He furrowed his brow in instinctive concern, his curiosity piqued by your vague explanation. Why did you suddenly want to delay the call? What were you hiding? Sae's mind raced with possibilities, each more troubling than the last.

Sae: Tell me  a credible explanation as to why we should refrain from calling at this moment?

You: Well, there are certain matters… that require my attention and preparation at this time…

Sae's intuition had become finely attuned to the nuances of your words, to the subtle shifts in your tone and demeanor that betrayed the truth beneath the surface. Over the years, he had learned to decipher the language of your heart, to recognize the telltale signs of deception or concealment.

It wasn't just a matter of familiarity, but a deep understanding born from years of shared experiences and intimate moments. Sae knew you better than anyone else, perhaps even better than you knew yourself. He had witnessed the full spectrum of your emotions, from joy to sorrow, from anger to affection, and he could read them like an open book.

So when your message arrived, cloaked in evasion and half-truths, Sae's instincts immediately kicked in. He sensed the hesitance in your words, the reluctance to reveal the full extent of whatever was weighing on your mind. And though he couldn't pinpoint the exact nature of your deception, he knew enough to recognize that something was amiss.

Sae: And that thing is?

You: Confidential! 

Sae's frustration bubbled to the surface, his jaw clenching as he read your message. The very idea of you keeping something from him, especially under the guise of confidentiality, struck a nerve deep within him. After all, honesty and openness had been the pillars of your relationship, the guiding principles that had bound you together through thick and thin.

The notion that you would go against your own principles, that you would hide something from him when you had always been so transparent, felt like a betrayal of the trust the two of you had built over the years. Sae couldn't help but feel a surge of indignation, a righteous anger that burned hot in his chest.

You were his partner, his confidante, his rock in times of need. And he had always believed that you would share everything with him, no matter how difficult or sensitive the topic. The idea that you would choose to keep something from him, to shut him out of your thoughts and feelings, was almost incomprehensible to him.

Since Sae had enough of this game of cat and mouse, he didn’t hesitate a second to call you. As the phone rang in his ear, Sae's heart pounded with a mixture of apprehension and urgency, but remained composed. With each unanswered ring, his worry deepened, eclipsing his frustration with a sense of impending dread. He couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong, that you needed him at this moment, and he was failing to reach you.

With a furrowed brow, Sae clenched his jaw, his fingers tapping anxiously against the phone as he waited for you to pick up. Each passing second felt like an eternity, stretching out into the abyss of uncertainty. What if you were in trouble? What if you needed his help and he wasn't there for you?

The thought sent a chill down his spine, driving him to redouble his efforts to reach you. He dialed your number again, the urgency in his movements disclosing the depth of his concern. He couldn't bear the thought of you being in distress, of facing whatever challenges lay ahead without him by your side.

Sae: (Name), answer right this instant.

Once more, Sae's call came through, lingering in the air as the phone rang persistently. After nearly half a minute, you finally answered.

“S-Sae… I was in the bathroom a while ago. I didn’t know you called.” Your voice tinged with an apologetic tone as you explained your delayed response. Meanwhile, on the other end of the line, Sae's calm demeanor masked a subtle hint of authority.

As you spoke, there were faint sounds of movement, suggesting you were adjusting your position. Then, in a soft yet firm tone, Sae remarked, "I can't see you."

There was a pause, filled only with the distant sounds of ambient noise. Eventually, you responded, your voice slightly muffled, indicating that you had turned away from the screen. 

"I prefer not to show my face right now."

Sae's forehead creases deeper, a subtle sign of frustration evident in the way he clicked his tongue in disapproval. "After all these years together, you're still embarrassed for me to see your face during our calls?" he questioned, a note of exasperation creeping into his voice.

He couldn't help but scoff at the irony of the situation, but your response was only a timid whimper, revealing your discomfort.

"I don't want to..." you trailed off, your voice barely above a whisper.

"(Name)," Sae sighed, his tone gentle yet probing. "Why are you so reluctant for me to see your face?"

He shifted his position on the couch, leaning back and resting his head against the backrest. The monotony of your ceiling, the only thing visible to him on the screen, began to wear on him. He had been eagerly awaiting this moment for hours, eager to see your face after fulfilling his responsibilities. Yet now, when he finally had the chance, you seemed adamant about hiding yourself. It left him perplexed. It couldn't simply be shyness. There had to be something more, some underlying reason driving your reluctance.

"It's because..." you began, but trailed off, briefly glancing at your phone. In that moment, Sae caught a glimpse of your forehead and your swollen eyes before you hastily averted your gaze, returning the screen to its previous view of the ceiling.

"That's the reason! Now you've seen me!" you cried out, your voice tinged with anguish.

So, the reason you didn't want Sae to see you was because you had been crying. He had a suspicion it might be related to the movie you watched. But this wasn't the first time tears had stained your cheeks in each other's presence. The memory of past conflicts and misunderstandings lingered, casting a shadow over your relationship. Some of those tears had been shed because of Sae himself, a fact that weighed heavily on his conscience.

His reaction to your tears was complex. Despite his outward facade of indifference, he couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt whenever he saw you in distress. It stirred a deep-seated sense of inadequacy within him, a belief that he was somehow to blame for your tears. Beneath his stoic exterior lay a turbulent sea of emotions, swirling with remorse and self-doubt.

In those moments of conflict, Sae's instinct was to act swiftly. He would seek reconciliation, eager to mend the rift between you and offer a sincere apology, regardless of the cost to his pride. His concern for your well-being was genuine, rooted in a profound appreciation for your presence in his life. Despite your reassurances that you could handle things on your own, Sae couldn't shake the feeling of responsibility that weighed heavily on his shoulders. 

Your influence on Sae was undeniable. You had touched his life in ways he never imagined, prompting him to confront his own shortcomings and strive for personal growth. Despite his flaws and occasional bouts of unpleasantness, he was willing to go to great lengths to ensure your happiness.

"(Name), have I not previously conveyed to you that there is no need for secrecy between us?" Sae's voice was gentle yet firm as he spoke, prompting you to glance at your phone screen once more.

"Yeah... I'm just embarrassed that you'll see me with swollen eyes because of a movie," you admitted, sniffling softly.

"I've witnessed you in more dire conditions than this. There's no reason for you to feel ashamed. It's not as though it poses a threat to your life, you see?"

"Whatever," you retorted, rolling your eyes, eliciting a faint smile from Sae. "I know you're just going to say it's only a movie and whatnot."

"And yet, here you are, treating it like it's classified information when it's really something trivial," he chuckled, observing your pouting expression.

"That's why I didn't want to call, because you're just going to tease me!" you protested, your bottom lip jutting out in a pout.

"You're a bit of a goof sometimes," Sae shook his head, amusement evident in his tone. He glanced at his screen, finally able to see your entire face as you pouted. Your eyes, still swollen from crying, met his for a moment before you averted your gaze to the side, avoiding him.

Your eyes were still swollen from crying over the movie. Sae couldn't help but wonder what kind of film had evoked such a strong emotional response from you. His lips curled upwards imperceptibly as he pondered.

"So, tell me what happened in the movie?" 

As you began to speak, your voice filled with enthusiasm and passion, Sae couldn't help but be drawn in. Instantly, he found himself captivated by your words, hanging on every detail of the film's storyline as you painted a vivid picture with your descriptions. Your eyes sparkled with excitement, reflecting the joy that bubbled within you as you delved into the intricacies of the plot.

Watching you come alive with each word, Sae felt a warmth spreading through his chest, a feeling of contentment settling over him like a comforting embrace. Despite the weight of earlier worries, seeing you so animated and happy brought a smile to his lips, banishing the shadows that had clouded his thoughts just moments before.

As you spoke, your gestures animated and your laughter contagious, Sae found himself swept up in the moment, his own worries fading into the background as he basked in the glow of your happiness. For him, there was no greater pleasure than seeing you so alive, so full of life and vitality.

In the end, it wasn't the film itself that mattered, but the way it brought you joy and excitement. And in that shared moment of connection, as you shared your thoughts and feelings with him, Sae couldn't help but feel grateful for the simple yet profound pleasure of being by your side.

[caffedrine]

Gilbert von Obsidian - The Boundary of Touch - Event Summary

I pretty much have no idea what I’m doing. I don’t trust me, and you shouldn’t either. This summary is not guaranteed to be accurate, it’s mostly written for myself to follow along with Gilbert.

The conference room in the Obsidian Castle always has a solemn, heavy atmosphere, even though Gilbert is in a relatively good mood today. He has brought Emma to this meeting where Gilbert’s advisors discuss reforms for the country. Seeing everyone else in perfect military uniform and formation, Emma can’t help but straighten her own posture.

Gilbert complains that they only bring him problems and no solutions, and he has no use for people who can’t think for themselves. Overall, though, he is pleased with their ideas and ends the meeting. Afterward, he asks Emma for her impressions, and she thanks him for allowing her to attend. Despite what he said earlier, Emma noticed that the personnel had presented many solutions, and if unforeseen circumstances need them to change course, she thinks they presented useful backup plans that wouldn’t be difficult to implement.

Well, if Emma thinks they’re useful, Gilbert doesn’t see the need to ‘fire’ his advisors. Emma frowns, in Obsidian, this is technically a threat. Gilbert laughs at her expression and tells her that he was just kidding, and he agrees with her that the advisors are improving. A little bit. With a smile, he intertwines his fingers with hers.

Oh, this brings back memories of last night, and Emma’s heart skips a beat. And just after the solemn and formal atmosphere of the conference! Emma feels guilty even as she squeezes Gilbert’s hand.

Gilbert laughs, she’s feeling a bit clingy today. Emma flushes, just as a door opens behind her and she hears footsteps. She can feel a gaze on her and turns to look, but no one is looking at her. Maybe it was her imagination?

Later, when Emma passes Gilbert in the hallway, she catches the reflected gaze of a soldier from the window. Maybe it wasn’t her imagination, but what was with that look?

While Emma puzzles it, Gilbert asks what she’s thinking of.

Could it be that she’s getting too impersonal with Gilbert? Open affection goes against military training, the soldiers must disapprove of her constantly touching Gilbert.

Oh no, she has been very frivolous with him. No, she needs to improve herself and become more composed and more formal with Gilbert.

Emma assures Gilbert that it is nothing, she was distracted by a bird flying outside the window. Gilbert smiles faintly and doesn’t press it.

Later that night, Emma is sitting next to Gilbert on his bed as he gently plays with her hair. He warns her that she needs to get better at lying, while that pivot earlier was well done, her expression right now is ruining it. That poor bird outside the window would be so sad.

Oh, he noticed. Well, of course, he did.

And on that note, Emma can imagine what his reaction would be if she told him truthfully that she thinks people disapprove of how much she clings to him.

Gilbert only smiles at her and asks if she won’t say it. Of course, if she does, he will kill everyone in the castle. He’ll erase everyone, just for her.

(Hahaha, he’s not joking)

Fine, she’ll explain herself. Emma explains that while she does feel people looking at her, she’s not embarrassed at being seen. It’s more that she’s embarrassed over her own shortcomings. She wants to touch him, but when she does, she feels her emotions get carried away. She doesn’t want to damage the dignified atmosphere he’s cultivated.

Oh, is that it? Gilbert doesn’t mind, he’s only like this with her. But if she wants to refrain from touching him in public, what can he do? Okay, tell him her limits and he’ll follow her lead.

Oh, uh, Emma was expecting more pushback about this. Gilbert shrugs glibly, he doesn’t mind testing this whim of hers. He also wants to see how far he can forgive her.

Err, right. Well, might as well strike while the fire’s hot. Emma asks if they can start tomorrow, and Gilbert agrees. He smiles sweetly and contently, but Emma can’t help but think that he has something nefarious planned.

The next day has Emma delivering documents to Gilbert. He greets her with his usual smile, their fingers brushing as he accepts the documents from her.

Is this okay?

At Emma’s confusion, Gilbert clarifies: is this type of touch acceptable within Emma’s limits? Demonstratively, Gilbert’s index finger slides along the tips of Emma’s fingers.

Uh, yeah. It’s fine.

Okay, what about this?

Gilbert’s fingers brush against the palm of Emma’s hand, and her heart starts hammering at the tingling feeling. Okay, does Gilbert understand they’re still in public?

Gilbert laughs, Emma is very serious about this. Emma asks if this bothers him at all, but he denies it. After all, he’s just touching her hand.

Staring intently at Emma, Gilbert pulls the documents away from her hand, his fingers trailing from her wrist to her fingertips.

What is off-limits? Gilbert invites Emma to touch him in a way that they can’t in public. He points out that they’re in his private office, so she can touch him however she wants.

And now Emma feels like they’re doing something naughty, trying not to get caught. Gently, Emma reaches out to touch Gilbert’s face.

Oh, so this is off limits too? Does Emma realize that Walter often touches Gilbert’s face during his checkups? Well, great news for Gilbert then! He’ll just have to tell Walter that touching his face is off-limits now!

Oh no! Walter is touching Gilbert for a medical procedure, so it doesn’t count.

Gilbert disagrees, if touching his face is too inappropriate for public, then the intent doesn’t matter, the act is still off-limits.

Gilbert grasps Emma’s hand and brings it up towards his eyepatch. Emma tries to snatch her hand back, but Gilbert’s grip is too strong. First one, then a second finger disappears beneath his eye-patch.

Gilbert explains that for him, this means nothing; it’s just touching his eyepatch. But, from Emma’s expression, it’s different for her. As Gilbert uses her fingers to lift his eyepatch, Emma’s heart nearly hammers out of her chest. She whines that this is far from okay.

Oh, what a shame.

Gilbert lets go of Emma’s hand and muses that grabbing her hand probably wasn’t okay for public either. Though they are alone, they are outside of their bedroom. He asks for her forgiveness. Emma assures him that he’s fine, it’s up to her to restrain herself.

Gilbert asks if Emma has figured out her thresholds yet. Can they still hold hands? He’d be so lonely if they couldn’t.

Emma decides that she’ll limit it to saying that touching faces is off-limits. Gilbert nods, he’ll let Walter know as well.

Nope! Gilbert isn’t getting out of his medically necessary exams that easily-

The sound of footsteps approaching stops Emma, and she apologizes for interrupting Gilbert, and hurries away. As she leaves his office, she sees Roderic approaching, and despite not being able to see his face, can almost feel his gaze boring into her.

Before long, she runs into Gilbert in the hallway. He reaches up to her cheek as if to pet her before stopping himself. Oops, he almost forgot! But if it’s what she want’s, he’ll comply.

Huh, usually Gilbert is a lot more pushy when he wants something. Is this some kind of trap?

Gilbert suddenly grabs Emma’s hand and brings it up to his neck. Politely, he asks why she looks so surprised, they said faces were off limits earlier, but not this.

Emma stutters as she feels Gilbert’s pulse beneath her fingers.

Ooh, Emma looks like she thinks this should be forbidden too. Well then.

Gilbert draws her hand down pressing it against his chest. He teases her, she must be very naughty if she is getting excited just by this.

But Gilbert does understand why she’s like this. Feeling his heartbeat is an intimate experience, touching something that no one else can touch. But, since she didn’t say this was off limits earlier, this must be an acceptable public display of affection.

Gilbert leans forward, and Emma can feel his breath on her face.

Oh no, Gilbert is in trouble. Now he can barely restrain himself. He asks Emma to figure out her limits by tonight, while he’s still feeling generous toward her.

And then Gilbert is gone.

Later, in her room, Emma considers Gilbert’s words as they permeate her brain like poison. What does she want?

She said that she doesn’t want to bother Gilbert’s solemn aura, but the main reason, if someone were to see her touching Gilbert . . .

Okay, restrictions on touching Gilbert wasn’t the issue. Instead, she needs to change her way of thinking. She remembers the conversation they had about how Walter could touch Gilbert all he wanted for medical reasons.

Eventually Gilbert visits Emma and sits on her bed next to her. He asks if she’s come up with her limits and Emma agrees.

Emma will touch him, but only for medical reasons.

Uh, medical reasons?

Right, like touching his arm to check his pulse, or his face to take his temperature. It’s all fine if it’s for health reasons!

After looking surprised, Gilbert bursts out in laughter. Emma really did think things through. This isn’t because she’s embarrassed at being seen, it’s that she’s developing dark, evil feelings that she is doing her best to avoid.

If he were to name those new feelings, he would imagine ‘possessiveness’ is the first one. She wants to touch him, to make it known that Gilbert is ‘her man’. But, she’s also very kind with the ‘pure heart’ so she cant bring herself to acknowledge those feelings. Hence, why she’s decided to avoid touching him in public.

Emma hangs her head in remorse, but there was one thing Gilbert missed. She didn’t want to show off that Gilbert was hers, but that she loved him most in the world.

Gilbert looks pleased. His poison is spreading through Emma, and the thought of her joining in his depravity sends shivers of joy down his spine. Will Emma ever forgive him?

No, Emma won’t blame Gilbert for this one. Besides, he hasn’t done anything evil to her recently.

Well, in that case, Gilbert will take the win. He grabs Emma’s hand and places it on his throat again, just like earlier.

Since it’s for medical reasons, there’s no reason to feel bad about it. She can medically feel him up all day in front of anyone and everyone.

Suddenly Gilbert’s mouth is on hers, his teeth nipping at her lower lip. Pulling back, he apologizes but he’s no longer feeling generous. Emma asks if by generous he means ‘listening to her selfishness’ but Gilbert denies this. No matter what, he will always listen to her.

No, seeing her struggle with dark emotions has Gilbert at his limit and he will no longer hold back. But he has no doubt that she’ll forgive him this gaffe, after all, she loves him the most. Before Emma can respond, Gilbert’s mouth is on hers again.

As the kiss deepens, Emma feels herself melting into Gilbert. The sensation of his heartbeat pulses through her, like a sweet poison.

Gilbert’s mouth is at her ear, at her neck, and then his teeth sink into her shoulder. The sharp pain makes her shift uncontrollably with want.

Gilbert murmurs that when people are forbidden something, it suddenly becomes more attractive. He shifts Emma’s hand from his neck to his face, noting that when she said that this was off-limits, it suddenly became exciting.

Emma gasps that this is all just a medical procedure. Gilbert laughs, Emma doesn’t look like she’s performing a routine medical examination.

Suddenly Gilbert is over her, pinning the hand that was on his face to the bed. Emma feels his tongue trace down her throat only to feel a small sharp pain at the base. Gilbert apologizes for hurting her but warns her that he won’t stop. If he’s going to indulge her selfishness, he expects her to indulge him.

Suddenly Emam is lifted to sit in Gilbert’s lap with her back against his chest. Again, his teeth sink into her shoulder blade as his fingers reach down under her skirt to stir inside her.

Oh no, is Gilbert making her think about others watching her again? He removes his fingers and caresses her back. If she’s worried about being seen feeling her feelings, why not lock herself up in her room?

Gilbert congratulates himself for coming up with the best ideas.

Fine, Emma will admit that she has been feeling possessive over him. She didn’t want to direct her selfish feelings to him, but she had to acknowledge something else. She’s the finance of a villain, and to love him, she must be an evil woman. So, instead of resisting, she will accept these selfish feelings of hers and show everyone how much she loves him.

Well then, it sounds like Gilbert’s solution of locking herself away or erasing everyone in the castle won’t work out. It’s only when she can bring herself to show off how she feels in front of others that she can become as evil as Gilbert.

Gilbert laughs, it looks like the face Emma is currently making isn’t something he’s willing to let anyone else see.

Emma feels Gilbert’s hands on her as the sensations drown out her thoughts and she loses track of what is good and what is evil.

The next morning, Gilbert is already gone by the time Emma wakes up. She easily changes into the black dress Gilbert made for her and ignores the small pains as she leaves the room.

Only to find Gilbert waiting for her just outside her door. He extends his wrist and asks her to medically check his pulse. Emma gives him a look before accepting his hand and touching his wrist.

Ooh, is it medically necessary to touch his hand so lovingly?

Well, yes it is.

Gilbert smoothly withdraws his hand and pulls something out from under his cloak. He holds up a black scarf, a present for becoming so evil. He drapes it over her shoulders, explaining that now she doesn’t have to worry about being seen.

Gilbert drops a kiss on Emma’s head, assuring her that it was just a medical procedure. Recent studies in mental health suggest that acts contributing to one’s emotional stability count as medical procedures.

Okay, and knowing Gilbert, that means that anything and everything is fair game.

So what if it is? Besides, this gives Emma the excuse she wants to show everyone that she loves Gilbert the most without being seen.

. . . what?

Suddenly suspicious, Emma lifts up the edge of the scarf and looks at herself, for the first time in forever. She looks at the bite marks that the dress doesn’t cover.

Ohh.

Emma thinks back to all the gazes on her and realizes that she had misread them. They weren’t judging her for clinging on to Gilbert. They were feeling pity for her after seeing all the bite marks he left behind.

And Gilbert knew the whole time.

(hehe)

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

can i be honest? im a fan of azul but his dream felt like it lacked impact. there were some very interesting moments and its better than the prediction that he would already be rich and own the world

like really? azul becomes a famous athlete and bullies others, then he takes over night raven? i feel like his struggles with his own identity and food could have been further explored and he is based off of ursula, which should extend to vanessa, right? it was the perfect reason to give him a total makeover and show that he has to be comfortable in his own skin before anything else, even if his other ness was what made him a target of bullying in the first place

your thoughts and worries on book 7 post has affected my perspective and i cant help but feel like something is missing 🥲 maybe all the budget went into Jade and Floyd?

[Referencing this post!]

As I’ve previously expressed, I have a lot of my own complicated feelings about the direction book 7 is taking, specifically with how the OB boys’ dream segments are presented and resolved. Azul’s dream is no different; it felt very contrived due to the formula TWST insists on running with in every new installment. It’s becoming even more apparent with each update, and it is really grating on me.

But!! Before I get to what I believe are shortcomings with Azul’s dream, let’s review what Anon has to say.

I feel like, no matter what, there will always be people claiming that the OB boys’ dreams are “missed opportunities”. This is simply because these characters have much more deep and complex issues than the rest of the cast, so we will naturally scrutinize them more. TWST is basically only able to go with one angle when they tackle the dream, leaving the other threads unexplored. This will surely annoy or disappoint people who wish that TWST would have addressed a different issue instead, or perhaps something closer to their personal interpretation of the events. In Azul’s case, I feel like some people (particularly in the west, not so much in the east) see Azul’s weight concerns or relationship with food as a prominent part of his character, so they wish that book 7 part 10 had looked into that more. However, that was never a big focus in canon, so it follows that TWST would want to dedicate its time and resources to the most pressing thing (which would be more centered on Azul’s general self-confidence, greed, and how those tie into his sense of identity). At the same time, they probably wanted to avoid a lens that is too broad. Having the focus be on Azul’s “otherness” or being an octopus might veer too heavily into something way beyond the scope of the ~10 parts of the story he has to himself.

We also need to consider that these dreams are meant to be shallow interpretations of what the dreamer desires (according to Idia). Only the OB boys get to go more in depth due to bring dragged down into deeper layers of their dreams. Azul wants to be accepted by his peers and is insecure about his lack of athleticism (as one reason why he was bullied was due to not being able to swim as fast as other merchildren). So of course the surface level of his dream makes him a star athlete beloved by all. The whole “his plan succeeds, he steals everyone’s magic, he takes over NRC” thing happens in the second layer of his dream, which, like all previous OB boys, is a dark display of what would have happened had they not been stopped. And finally, Azul being a bully is nothing new—we saw this behavior back in book 3 as well. He became the very thing he despised back when he was a victim, and now he continues to perpetuate that cycle of bullying in an effort to affirm confidence in his “cool” new identity. I think the dream was very intentional in trying to entice him with the promises of power and acceptance. That, in turn, shows us that the desire to be a successful businessman (the thing many of us thought would be his dream) actually hinges on Azul’s longing to be accepted. His struggle with his identity and how it depends on how others perceive him was portrayed. I’m just not sure if the idea was executed in the best way, since it sounds like the message may have gotten muddled along the way and it definitely requires some reading between the lines.

I noticed that you cited my original post where I detailed my concerns about book 7 and how that has influenced your own thoughts 💦 I hope that it just… informed or supplemented your opinions rather than suddenly altered them to be more “in line” with my own. I never want to be the kind of person who claims their interpretations are the “most correct” I’m not Riddle’s mom, okay?? 😭

About Jade and Floyd’s dreams, I feel like those are less heavily critiqued because they, by virtue of not being an OB boy, have fewer stakes and are predominantly there to be silly. It’s like contrasting Epel wanting to be big and buff to Vil literally murdering Neige; there is just no comparison. Even then, I wouldn’t necessarily say Floyd’s and Jade’s parts received “all the budget”… They seemed like pretty basic storylines to me, perhaps dressed up slightly better thanks to the new undersea assets and bioluminescence reveal.

My issues with Azul’s dream segment is how… ham-fisted several elements were. All of it, for the sake of sticking to the pattern already established earlier. It feels so unnatural and stilted because you just KNOW it’s written this way to fit the template 😔 For example:

Why did Jade become SO dumb when they were trying to figure out where Azul had moved the contracts? He’s supposed to be much smarter than how he is presented here. Wouldn’t his immediate thought be to check Azul’s room? But NO, Jade can’t come to that conclusion on his own because we need a contrived reason for each student to use their UM before the ending :/ so Jade has to waste time using his UM to get the truth out of his dream!self.

Jade and Floyd sitting around and going “………….” while they watch Azul make an ass of himself was such a time waster. Clearly you have enough brains to know what would trigger him, so why are you not acting on it???? Oh yeah, because we need to show more cool stuff in this dream like La Grotta!

Azul literally turns to the camera and tells his OB self, “Unlike you, I’ve changed.” It’s way too on the nose with what it’s trying to communicate. It breaks immersion and makes it so obvious the characters are outright stating their character development to make sure we all “get it”.

What was the purpose of Azul using his UM to get the mermobs to sign a contract to give all their power to him???💀 Bro can just say “excuse me, I forgot something back at the Coral Rush field” and they’d probably let him pass. But again, Azul isn’t allowed to do that because he MUST use his UM before the ending. Because Azul’s UM requires that another person willingly agree and sign a contract, his mandatory UM use before the grand finale feels particularly forced.

How many times do I need to listen to Idia/Ortho or other characters warn us about how we can’t have too many people dream hopping or else bugs might happen or Malleus might notice… It’s almost like the devs realize how long this is being dragged out for so they have to remind us every so often.

Not only that, but we get such poorly constructed explanations to keep characters behind while a new character goes with the main group. Why don’t you just leave them all behind once they’re awake then?? Oh yeah, because we NEED to drag along the current student into the next dream so everyone gets a cameo. It’s so inorganic how the characters are chosen to stay behind, Jamil just conveniently volunteers himself while we also listen to another spiel from Silver and Sebek about how their training makes them more stable than the twins to keep dream hopping.

I would actually consider Azul’s dream… serviceable? Like it isn’t fantastic or anything but for what it is, it works. It’s cohesive enough. But god, did I dislike how rigid it was… Nothing happens because it’s natural, it happens because the script demands it happens. To quote another post:

If anyone has played the first Ace Attorney game, this feels a LOT like that part in case 2 where Phoenix is too dumb to check the back of a receipt until Mia literally tells him to. The [characters have] to actively be made stupider because the scenario calls for it, and that really rubs me the wrong way.

[fishshapedcloud]

jupiter in detriment

what happens when you put such enormous, expansive energy into a delicate place?

jupiter in the 3rd house: strange at first but turns out to be charming

shadow jupiter in the 3rd house: really amazing to be around at first but turns out to be annoying or off-putting

jupiter in the 3rd house is a "split personality" that can mesmerize with words for hours on end, but the very next day say one tiny thing that gives you the "ick". or, they might talk nonstop and then suddenly go silent. expansive jupiter also creates a distinctive voice that you simply have to notice, for better or worse (usually better!).

the 3rd house is the social house of the highly personal first quadrant of a chart. jupiter in the 3rd relies heavily on their natural talent for getting along well with people and being good company. they collect people in their lives to verbally rejoice and suffer with. others love to be around them, as they can speak on just about anything and make it fascinating, but many others find them annoying or braggadocious. others seek them out often for clear, thoughtful advice.

friends come and go through a revolving door throughout their lives, which the native accepts without question because frequent changes of scenery were normal in early childhood. they get along with anyone because they had to constantly make new friends as kids. but there are so many friends at once that sometimes, it's hard to keep track of who stays and goes. they can’t help being so popular! still, they maintain a circle of extremely, intimately close friends for support at all times, and definitely put those friends to work with constant communication and requests for words of affirmation. they may sever these friendships abruptly, however.

their shadow side comes out when they try to use their hypnotic companionship to make sure that their chosen people (especially love interests, as jupiter is associated with the husband in vedic astrology) talk to them forever and ever. being disingenuous is not a good look for honest jupiter, and the ghoster becomes the ghosted.

jupiter in the 6th house: mean at first but turns out to be very caring

shadow jupiter in the 6th house: really caring at first but turns out to be mean and self-involved

everything and nothing about Jupiter in the 6th is intriguing. the 6th house is one of the dark houses and with jupiter here, all things related to service, work, health issues, etc. become joyful experiences. this is someone that you want to do chores and go grocery shopping with. they’re also someone that you want by your side when you have health problems or need to go to the doctor.

jupiter is prone to excess and in the nitpicky 6th house, they might be hypervigilant about some aspects of self-care and completely careless about others, which might present as somewhat hypocritical and puzzling to others. the truth is that these natives know that they can’t take care it all, so they simply do what they enjoy.

jupiter here is very forgiving of things that they find annoying in others, but might "ghost" if it goes too far, or on the other hand, they might lose themselves in complete service to a cruel, toxic romantic partner. they are also prone to making critical “jokes” that unintentionally create deep wounds in others. jupiter is the higher octave of mercury and jupiter in the 6th house is "above" critiquing people or communicating about sensitive, taboo topics. they would rather just remove themselves from the situation, only to find themselves back in vicious cycle...

they like to stay grounded by acknowledging their own shortcomings, and aren’t afraid to share them with others as a way to normalize human flaws. they go to great lengths to protect their joy, and are very welcoming of people to join their daily routines, but just as quick to cut them off as well. these are folks that will always surprise you with how helpful they can be. they love to “come to the rescue” and then simply disappear. there are just so many people to support in this life!

[mychlapci]

Suggestion knockout as the result of an incomplete wifefication (I think that's how you spell it)

some noble he was dating tried it but he realized what was going on halfway through and decided to use it to his advantage by leaning into the persona. That mech became the first of many mechs ko would dupe into giving him everything they had to offer then ditch until ending up with breakdown.

He didn't get away without some side effects of course, he likes things clean, likes himself looking stunning, avoids combat when he can, and has a deep set need for a companion to take care of. All needs that breakdown happily satisfied until his passing leaving knockout on the prowl for a new big strong mech to satisfy himself and oh would you look at that megatron is just his type with plenty of resources to ensure he's well taken care of, whelp looks like his lord will be in for a checkup soon.

Megatron isn't sure what prompted knockouts newfound attentiveness but he's hardly complaining when he has a pretty little medic fussing over him and eagerly listening to his tales of battle while hanging off his arm like a prized accessory. It's only natural that he'd seek out a strong presence for comfort him after breakdowns passing and it's only right that megatron offer his dear medic that comfort like a good leader. A good leader takes care of his loyal followers. A good leader keeps his devoted medic safe away from the frontlines, a good leader lets his sweet little companion reward him with his tight little valve as thanks, a good leader keeps his lover pampered with presents and stuffed to the brim with transfluid just to keep that adoring gaze on him. Nothing makes him feel more like a king than lounging on his throne as he works with his beautiful little wife on his lap belly distended with tranfluid.

ohoho that is so fun. we've never mentioned what would happen if a wifefication failed. Knockout was lucky to realize that something fishy was going on, before that bastard could've turned him into an obedient little housewife that doesn't speak out of turn he robs that fucker blind and goes on to have himself a lavish little lifestyle... This only makes his relationship with Breakdown so much sweeter. He really looked at this big oaf and thought that one. And it makes what comes after even sadder.

His processor is forever altered, he needs a big strong mech at his side to take care of after Breakdown is gone, someone whose arm he can hang off of and show off his finish... Megatron is the best choice, for all his shortcomings. He's someone who can hold Knockout and bounce him up and down in his lap without breaking a sweat, a big strong husband whose shoulders he can massage... Of course though, Megatron will eventually want heirs, something Knockout never wanted to provide for his husbands before, but grief stricken as he is, he might as well submit.

[cherryblossombankai]

hi! would you be able to do headcanons for what rufus + the turks do when it's their s/o's birthday? thanks in advance :D

Rufus

Rufus might have a lot of shortcomings as a partner, but he makes up for it by never forgetting special occasions. Whether or not he sees them as being all that special might be up for debate. Your birthday will be one of the things he will go all out over. He also wants it to be all glitz and glamor. So think a surprise birthday gala after a full day at the spa. 

Tseng

Tseng has every occasion noted in his calendar for the whole year. The one and only time he actually takes a day off if for your birthday, and absolutely nobody in the office knows why he takes the day off. Acts of service are his love language, so you can expect him to spoil you rotten all day long. 

Reno

Let’s be honest, Reno forgot it was your birthday. Not because it’s not important to him, but he’s just a little forgetful. He’s got a lot on his plate, and he tries really hard to be a good partner. Things just sometimes slip his mind. When it does finally dawn on him, he’ll make sure he lavishes you in the most expensive gifts possible. 

Rude

Rude will remember your birthday, and he will make it flashy. He’ll take the day off, and everywhere he takes you he’ll make sure everyone knows it’s your big day. He probably got you one of those corny crowns to wear, but he won’t make you wear it if you don’t want to. 

Elena

She is probably the most thoughtful about your birthday. She gets pretty sentimental and will handwrite you a card that’s likely to make you cry. She’ll buy you fancy presents, but also really sentimental things like a photo album of all your good times together. Her number one goal for the day is for you to feel special. 

[mirandyficlists]

Fic Searches sometimes take Time.

Hey there my Mirandy Dandies hope you're all well.

After a number of particularly noxious Anonymous messages from someone, or possibly several someones, kvetching about oh so many shortcomings with my Tumblr site and my other actions in the fandom as a whole, I felt I needed to make this post to clarify a few things about:

What I do,

What I'm able to do.

What I'm willing to do

The way this platform works...something, bear in mind, that I can't change.

I am a diehard Mirandy Dandy and one of the things I love to do is to SHARE the goodness and to chat about fics whenever I can. Having been a victim of the loss of Angelfire and Geocities when so much amazing fic was lost to us in the Xenaverse and other of my earlier fandoms, when I became a Mirandy Dandy I was not going to see myself in the same limbo and made a point of fully harvesting all fics as they were posted and keeping external copies of my treasures, updated monthly whenever possible. I did this, by the way, from the beginning on LJ to the present and let me tell you, keeping track of and harvesting fics from LJ was not easy and took a hell of a lot of time copying and pasting but I did it to the best of my ability.

The Mirandyverse is now 18 years old (we should all buy us a drink…well in the UK anyway, lol.) and we have people finding the Dark Side every week. Now these newbies and youngsters have often never set foot on LJ, if they’ve even heard of it, some have never set foot on FFnet even not to mention places like Passion & Perfection and the Pink Rabbit Consortium, and therefor have missed out on some great gems and giants of the days when new fics came out thick and fast. Thus the difference between the 3732 fics recorded for DWP on AO3 and the 5422 fics I have listed on my spreadsheet. Added to this the number of fics that have since been deleted or lost in other ways and you end up with the Newbies truly missing out.  And so I try to spread the goodness as best I can and share my harvested treasures when asked, as well as letting the masses know about that on several different platforms.

Because I love the fandom as I do, a significant amount of my time is invested in it, but as with everyone, I have a real 3D life that demands my presence and attention regularly and sometimes exclusively when, well, when shit happens as they say. Add to this my personal disabilities and I sometimes struggle being able to do things and thus have to let some things, like fandoms, slide in order to cope with the day to day. But when I’m better I always come back. And my disabilities can bear good fruit too, in this case my fic Spreadsheets, necessitated for my enjoyment because of my medically induced memory problems but that have been used and enjoyed by the fandom as a whole. Silver linings and all that.

I am always willing to share the Mirandy goodness in anyway I can manage. I LOVE being able to send deleted fics to people who either haven’t read them or aren’t able to access their old favourites because they were deleted. Hence my spreadsheet which keeps track of the existence and whereabouts of about 97% of all Mirandy fics online. And also my Themed Rec lists, now numbering 157 different groupings. All of which assist me in helping out with fic searches which I always try to source whenever they are presented, and that sourcing includes seeking help of other Dandies on different platforms.  Now, just to clarify, none of these things are complete or exhaustive, but I do keep them up to date within the limitations stated above AND try to make sure to share them online at least every couple of years. I don’t mind doing it, it gives me pleasure, but to my nasty Nonnies from earlier and any other Trolls who might be lurking…I AM UNDER NO OBLIGATION TO DO ANY OF THE THINGS I DO FOR THE FANDOM. I do it out of love of the Mirandyverse and the vast, VAST majority of truly wonderful Mirandy Dandies.

Tumblr is, as we who tumble know, both glorious and hideous as far as social networking platforms go, and has always been meddled with by admin for the sake of selling it off and trying to monetize it into oblivion and not to actually improve the functionality for the users in anyway. And that is the arena in which I operate this Tumblr and adapt how I do so in order to accommodate my needs.

So just for your collective FYI specifically regarding Anonymous asked fic searches…

If you have sent an anonymous fic search and have not seen an answer posted for a very long while:        

I am NOT ignoring you.

                                I am NOT ‘being lazy.’   

                                I have NOT deleted your request.            

                                And believe it or not I have NOT forgotten about you.

I check my in box weekly to remind myself of the searches I am still tracking down, so

not getting a response to an Anonymous ask only means I have not yet found your fic, but I am still looking for the fic, when time permits me.

Because you sent an Anonymous ask, if I try to answer it and let you know that I’m still looking for the fic, the ask is removed from my in box and I no longer have it in an easily accessible place to remind myself to continue the search.   So instead, I keep the asks in my in box until I find the fic requested, which lets be honest my Dandies, given some of the descriptions or key points you sometimes give could be one of several thousand fics and it takes some time to sift through, lolol.  If you want to be kept updated on the search progress, then it is much better if you PM me directly so that I can communicate with you.

To finish off I do want to say, ANY Mirandy Dandy is ALWAYS welcome to contact me with asks and questions in what ever way best suits their needs all I ask is that you appreciate any limitations attached to your preferred method and behave accordingly.

The Mirandyverse is generally a stress-free and positive place to be and always has been, and it is my dearest hope that it continues to be a space free from the toxicity that often invades other fandoms.  To that end I will always continue to offer my services to fellow Dandies in a spirit of helpfulness and sheer Joie de Vive.

Long live the Mirandyverse!