#and the reason they all showed up might be sad
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Sorry, having sad Martin thoughts again.
So there's this particular scene from episode 144. I for some reason forgot this happened in my first two listens (how, idk. S4 makes me feel a lot), then caught it on my third.
This is the second time we hear Daisy coming to talk to Martin in his office while he's working for Peter.
Cold AF. Hurts like hell to hear. You can understand his distrust of her, she tried to kill Jon, threatened to pin him with the murder of Jurgen, and Jon almost died again saving her from the coffin. All that tracks.
But that's not what's happening here. Because this follows immediately after:
Daisy kept coming around the office, getting friendly. Martin knew Peter was around and, if he saw anyone constantly hindering his progress of becoming a part of the Lonely, would have sent her right to it.
But he couldn't just be nice, or didn't feel like he could. Can't give a proper warning when Peter could be anywhere, and if he's too light a touch, she might see it as a call for help and keep hanging around.
So he does the only thing he can, tells her to piss off. It works. He's more lonely than ever, severing yet another connection he was even starting to form again, but she's safe from Peter now.
Which, I have to reiterate, he could have just let Peter deal with her. He is probably harboring a lot of jealousy for Daisy right now. He can't be anywhere near Jon, but now suddenly Jon and Daisy are spending time licking their wounds and listening to the Archers. And Martin is a pretty petty person. He could have kept her talking until Peter got bored and sent her away. Job done.
But he didn't. He readily admits to not really liking anyone here, and not believing anyone likes him either, but he's still trying to keep people safe. Not just Daisy ā the entire institute
He's been single handedly keeping half the Institute from being vanished into the Lonely. And he does it because of Jon.
He doesn't like Daisy, but Jon does. Jon nearly died saving her. Jon did die attempting to save everyone. So when Jon didn't wake up from his coma, even though Martin was falling into his own despair, he decided to make the best of whatever life was left in him to honor Jon's memory and keep the others safe.
And there's just something about Daisy in particular being the one to reach out to Martin, as well. She knows what it looks like when you start to give yourself to the Fears. She tried to throw out a life preserver, but if Martin took it, it could have dragged her down too. Or at least, it's how he felt (depression will do that to you. You're not worth saving, and if anyone attempts to do so, then they'll only get hurt, so why even bother asking for help?)
Yet another "I don't know how to end this ramble", but just ā ugh. This man hurts me. I will never be okay about this goddamn show.
#the magnus archives#tma#martin blackwood#jonathan sims#daisy tonner#peter lukas#tma spoilers#tma s4 spoilers#OW#CAN I GO ONE DAY WITHOUT PAIN?#CAN I?#demirambles#FUCK. Noticed this after publishing#Jon is the one who sends Daisy to check on him#Jon is trying so fucking hard to keep Martin tethered#knowing he can't be near him#*incoherent noises*#ok thats all. I'm good
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It was probably wise to let Blaze do the talking and negotiations. She was a Royal and had probably taken classes or had some training and experience that they just didn't have. Lanolin was doing great but he had seen enough to know she wasn't great when she got frustrated or angry. They needed someone like Blaze who could keep a level head when she had to.
" I agree with Blaze on this... She should do the talking, none of us are diplomats or negotiators by trade. She's probably the most qualified of us... and right now we need experience..."
He sighed at belle giving her a glance as he somewhat agreed with both her and Kit.
" Well i like to think he was being kind in giving us an hour. But... it was also probably to stress us out. Make us worry, panic, and see how we'd react to the situation... but, i do agree with Belle. Until he proves he's a threat... we should assume he's on the up and up... but that said--- we should take everything he says with a grain of salt..."
Miles scratched his own Chin as Rowan was probably right but he had a better question. What was GUN really after? What as there end goal? This had to have some bigger picture right? Why risk ruining GUNs reputation? There was something missing and he just didn't know what it was yet.
" I'm tellin' ya right now...the guy stinks! everything about this feels wrong... my gut tells me they are up to no good! an a good PI always follows there GUT! "
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She laughed a little at Surge, though it sounded kind of sad and depressed. She rubbed her own cheek as she thought about herself as normal. She never told any of them about why she was there, why she was fighting so hard or why she refused to back down. They all had there motivations and reasons to fight---hers was probably the worst reason of all.
She just wanted Revenge...
" ... I'm anything but normal... and i should have listened to Whisper. She spotted him near day one and i... blindly defended him. I just thought... i knew better... "
She rubbed her arm and glanced away from Surge not sure how she felt on the matter. But she knew she fucked up, and had to somehow make amends with whisper later.
" I just... get so caught up in trying to be a good leader i forget to listen to my team. I thought i knew better... i thought... i thought i could make us ready so we wouldn't be caught again. I don't want a situation like Eggperial city again... but i walked right into his trap... like a fool...But, i won't make that mistake again...ever again "
" Yea, the Director... Jewel never showed up at the command center and i'm worried about her. She should have been with Vector... but she wasn't there. So i wanna check the infirmary...maybe she got hurt during the landing and is being cared for. She's not a fighter... but Restoration won't run without her... she keeps us running smoothly... you might not realize it but without Jewel everything falls apart...we need her... "
She sighed and held out her hand to Surge
" We should get going...we have less then an hour now... and we still have alot to do..."
"If it came to asking him questions then maybe I should be the one to ask. I have never attempted any form of communication with the leader of Mobius before, though I guess now is as good a time as any." Blaze wasn't even sure where she stood on relations with G.U.N, though beyond the damage Eggman Nega caused her involvement here has never caused any problems.
"Well, he did give us an hour to let us get things in order to some degree. I suppose I simply dislike judging someone without getting to know them." Maybe Belle was playing devils advocate quite a bit right now, though she just liked to be as hopeful as she can be. After all, Thawne was the President so he couldn't do anything too crazy without looking bad. That offered a small amount of leeway.
"That all depends if G.U.N actual needed an hour to set something up which is why he gave it to us and keep our focus elsewhere." Kitsunami was sure that was a stretch, though who knows what G.U.N has up their sleeves. After all, The Restoration has a lot of power houses here right now, and three powerful speedsters as well.
"Eh, anything else would be overkill if you ask me. Besides, I wouldn't be surprised if by this point the whole word was watching what's going on. So now they'll have to be careful of what they do just as much as us going forward. If they misstep it'll be a PR nightmare for them." Rowan wouldn't be surprised if there were news vans all over the place by now as G.U.N doesn't move without getting noticed.
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"And here I thought you were the normal one out of the group. Guess all our weirdness finally got to you too." Surge still found it hard to believe any of them even liked her, even a little bit. Kitsunami did a way better job at getting along with them than she did, if you didn't count the times he would insult their level of intelligence. Most of that was directed at Tangle.
"Don't go trying to take credit for my fuck up. Mimic would've been found out way sooner if I wasn't covering for his ass when needed. Not to mention I was the one dumb enough to work for someone like Clutch." Surge didn't need Lanolin trying to blame herself when most of this was her fuckup. The only thing she didn't do was cause G.U.N to knock at their fucking door.
"Jewel?" Surge would have to think for a moment before remembering who that was. "Oh, the director chick. Gonna be honest, I never really talked to her. Though the fact she isn't glued to the command center now is weird, right? Maybe I should make a quick run around the base." Surge may not know Jewel well, though knew they were dedicated so even she found it odd they weren't at the command center. The tenrec would grab Lanolin's arm before dashing off at high speeds.
#All Grown Up and Ready to Fly#Tails#Unit Commander#Lanolin#Gears and Starters#Belle#Sorrowful Storm#Kitsunami#Blazing Princess#Blaze
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bfdia 17 and tpot 15 spoilers
bfdia 17
needleās votes were counted separately, which means pencil is out, which is sad but also funny because now she gets to host with the rest of the wtfers. oh yeah they get to host now! i love that, also balloony just warpdriving out killed me. loved the mini freesmart reunion
fries actually taking the immunity was also a welcome surprise, we didnt really need pin to get tortured more this late in the season. i also guess at this point there isnt really gonna be a merge so much as a bunch of singleton teams, buts thats fine imo. coinpin :)
loved all the little cameos in the mall, very fun. also leafy! didnt really have too much screen time but oughhh they were teasing her for so long i almost lost hope. so very close to the first ever bookleaf interaction
the main event of course is tennis ball and nickelās excellent adventure. if i had a nickel for every time a random donut line from bfb was justified by bfdia i would have two nickels: past nickel and future nickel. its nickelās fault gaty got eliminated btw he lured that bug up there. he also caused all of tpot 15 by kicking the yoylite into the future so THANKS BUDDY
overall very funny episode! as much as i hate to say it i think needle is going to go here, she was very close to elimination last time and she also didnāt really have much to do this time. nickel is also a solid possibility due to him destabilizing the fabric of spacetime, which sources tell me is not a very ācash moneyā thing to do
anyway time for The Horrors
tpot 15
nickel i am going to throttle you
i predicted basketball was gonna be out but it doesnt mean im happy about it. also tree staying in over robot flower was a shock, i thought people really liked her?? poor thang her self esteem is in the toilet now. at least they got to fly away on a dragon to get lesbian married together
i love love love how theyre using the rejects more its wonderful (the pda short was definitely a test to see if people would like the rejects as characters im sure of it). itrd trying to replace firey to make himself relevant inadvertently made relevant from people editing him over firey i love it
ive seen people say they dont like the time travel but me? im eating this up its so good, wonderfully silly depiction of the butterfly effect, its perfect for bfdi. the host continuously being changed was a wonderful bit, and host with a screen! there were so many callbacks for the bfdi geeks in the crowd (me), i hope they do more with the tfi style it is so nice to watch
PENCIL CRASH OUT ARC TO RING IN THE NEW YEAR HALLELUJAH thank you one for getting her on the show. actually this crash out and the resulting timeline devastation is the exact reason one rigged pencil to get it. poor pencil man she needs friends
the finale of the episode with everyone huddling together as reality falls apart honestly got to me. icy running over to me with book is everything to me. her last moments and she chooses to spend them with book sndbejuxhsbansn
ok uh elimination predictions probably tree from dpya but maybe marker?? idk maybe his fans wont like him green. from team two i would like it to be grassy but i know hes gonna get the most votes again somehow. sorry taggy it might be your time to go
idk how to end this
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So because for whatever reason, TFA Sentinel has been incredibly prevalent in my mind today, I decided I might as well draw him
The first big issue was drawing that goddamn face. The big chin caused problems for me because it changes how I need to draw the face. So he didnāt really end up looking great on my first try (top left)
But by the second drawing I found a way, one that stuck throughout the rest of the drawing as I had the sketch on hand to look at. This is how I had it for that last one
But yeah, scheming Sentinel probably ended up turning out the best in my opinion
I still need to work on his body proportions though, the bottom left especially is pretty wonky. But maybe with some more practice Iāll get it down more
Itās the shovel things on his shoulder that get me the most, I feel like I make them too small but also they cover too much area at the same time
The bottom left I drew because one of my references made me realize he had some absolutely huge hands
Due to proportion wonkiness, I donāt think I made them big enough to convey the actual point, but at least thereās the ref to get what Iām saying
The bottom right meanwhile I drew mostly because I wanted to draw him with big shook eyes. Then I made it a reference to when I tried to draw TFA Optimus by making him shocked by TFO Sentinel
But yeah, I think it turned out relatively well, and I wouldnāt mind drawing him more. Should probably try drawing him with Optimus in all honesty, and maybe Elita/Blackarachnia
I really donāt know why heās a favorite of mine, but he is. Heās a little bastard and I like seeing him suffer
Maybe it was the fanfic, maybe it wasnāt. I donāt know but heās mine now
But Iām also really sad that heāll never get the chance to have a proper character arc. I know Iāve spoken about it before, but Iām sad about it again. Granted, the show might never have given him one (and tbh I kind of lean more on the idea that he wouldnāt) but thatās one of the beauties of cancelled seasons, you can imagine anything was going to happen if it was plausible enough
I think he needs to properly suffer before getting a proper arc though. Or I guess have that be what drives him to change his ways. Not really sure what the suffering would be though, since I donāt think getting punished for his shadiness as acting Magnus would do that, itād be more comeuppance than anything
Iām thinking it should deal with his organic phobia, like have him be made a techno-organic or something, if only temporarily. But even if temporary, he has to properly suffer like that for a while, maybe gaining more of an understanding of what Blackarachniaās gone through and/or more of an understanding of organics
Honestly considering Blackarachnia was going to be the villain of Season 4, it probably wouldnāt be that implausible, I just donāt know if they would. And itāll never happen anyways, so who cares?
Ah well, I suppose. Thatās what fanfiction is for. So I need a multi chapter fanfic about a Sentinel redemption arc. Maybe it could be me one day, but I donāt have the commitment for that right now, just like every other idea I had
Anyways, Iām getting carried away now. Sentinel is neat and I donāt care if people hate him, heās special to me, even if I donāt know why
#I was gonna say something in the tags but I forgot what#I know this wasnāt it but honestly drawing the eye shades is more trouble than it seems#here I had the eyes be on a separate layer above but even then#maybe I just need to draw them bigger so my brush isnāt so cramped#not just with the eyes but with the everything#I do at least feel the urge to draw more half body sketches now instead of just heads#anyways#transformers#transformers animated#sentinel prime#tfa sentinel prime#my art
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yknow how richas said that bad's house doesn't feel like a Tio Bad house. he's right, in that it doesn't feel like a bad house. This isn't typically bad's building style, nor his usual colour palette. but richas was wrong, because it is a tio bad house. because the eggs helped him make it. you can see them in it its construction, in the colours and the blocks and the details. it's not a house built BY bad, even when he placed so many of its blocks. it's a house built For him.
he constantly loved them with his armour and his hearts and his weapons, all the little bits he did to help the parents protect and keep them. and now, even when he won't remember them, he'll be surrounded by their love too. when he is gone, the love for him will remain
#qsmp badboyhalo#tw death#ik this is angsty but it just feels so#fucking Loving#i was put off by the house at first like 'oh haha it doesn't feel like bad just like bad wont feel like bad soon'#but no#no#it doesn't feel like him because it feels like his loved ones#his favourite little guys#and the reason they all showed up might be sad#but that doesnt change the fact that they showed up#and helped him build his house#slams hand angrily on my desk ITS ALL ABOUT THE LOVE
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I was just ambushed within the turbulent halls of my own mind by some headcanons about rye ingellvar's childhood that did 15000000 points of psychic damage to me and my heart personally and also made me almost sure of how I want to play it all at the end (very very differently from how I imagined going in!). some 'oh holy fuck this changes everything' rocking my own world bullshit going on in my neurons right now I'm reeling
#I'm sorry to say that despite what I expected I think the dread wolf might be going down violently on my first run???#not because *I* love solas any less but because of who rye is and some of the twists I know happen down the line#which does make for a neat thing b/c I meant to play the crow I'm going with second as initially incredibly hostile#and then growing to feel for him and redeeming him at the end.#so if rye starts out very reasonable and sympathetic and then is brought to 'haha. no. fuck you forever for that in particular' at the end#...a pleasing cosmic symmetry in it I must admit. perfect and also makes me feel a bit sick#I'll try to put together something coherent eventually but for now#it's sort of a 'my name is ellaryen ingellvar you killed the guy#that my brain went 'close enough welcome back beloved and much missed deceased father figure' over. prepare to despair and die'#I think just the killing part might not have done it but everything that comes after? rye is a chill guy until he finally decides#that enough is fucking *enough*. and that was the most enough of all time for them#it also explains rye's accent (one of his primary caregivers growing up was a dwarf)! so many birds with one stone here#also I am so fucking sad now and I did it entirely to myself. I love fiction I love games (embarassingly genuine)#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#oc: ellaryen ingellvar#thank god that the romanced solas playthrough is the second one tho that does make things less dire haha#adaar would have given it the good old college try to get solas to change his mind right to the end I think#but even his capable hands and politician's mind could not hold back the sheer beware the fury of a patient man storm#that is about to hit solas for the shit he just pulled. I think rye and solas are -- as it turns out -- TOO alike in many ways#...solas buddy I'm so sorry I'll come back for you on the second playthrough and make it right I swear fhsak#it's just that a second dead dwarf dad has joined the chat to haunt the narrative (and this time it's fucking personal frfr)#it's almost scary how quick I've gotten attached to my rook tho. I've waited A DECADE to save this bald elf man from himself#and then rye shows up with steel in his normally kind eyes going 'no. I want that fucker *dead*'. and I just go anything for you babyboy#I'll see what we can do. unspeakable stuff
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GGS TEAM PAST!!!
#DUUUDE THIS WAS SO FUN#dreadful#veji#art#splatoon#splatoon 3#grand festival#grand fest splatoon#Man I shed like a few tears by the end of the reveal news thing#Like not out of sadness cause my team lost but just from the joy that all this happened and I was here for it.#I never got to experience splatoon 2ās final fest so Iāve waited 3 years for this and Iāmā¦. Just so happy!#If you couldnāt tell from the colours in the drawing Iām team future btw#I laughed so hard seeing the results lol we got NOTHING#Oh and I guess I should put my reasoning for my pick of future#so here it is:#I picked it because the future scares me. But itās gonna happen anyway so I might as well look forward to it#I canāt let myself worry about where Iāll end up and who Iāll be when Iām older#But I do need to keep looking forward#I also chose it cause of deep cut. Like that was a big factor in my choice#Their music shaped my tastes. I just love it so much#And sure the characters themselves arenāt as fleshed out as the other idols#But they still mean a lot to me as splatoon 3 is the game that got me into the franchise#Even though I played 2 before 3 could never fully enjoy it as I came too late#I missed every splatfest cause I got it a year before splat3#So I could never connect the way I did to 3#Hearing anarchy rainbow for the first time changed me man. I fell in love instantly. It just means so much.#As an autistic person I actually surprisingly donāt really stim that much. But hearing anarchy rainbow justā¦ flipped a switch.#I couldnāt stop moving. Literally like DJ Octavio man. It was a crazy experience to just feel like I had to move.#to walk around or something. To wave and flap my arms. Copy their dances. It sounds a little weird and childish when itās written down#But itās true. Splatoonās music showed me that my autistic stimming was something I should embrace.
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okay Iām annoying yk that and I know that.
I love to see what non bkdk shippers think will happen with the manga, bc this way I can learn and see things outside of my special interest for the chapters. And I was reading some interpretations of Ochako being weird in 425.
Some people are right here expecting izuku to go and support her. Some people saw him being this sad, yet only could think about him worrying about Ochakoās feelings over her fight, not Izukuās fight. they think this will lead to a beautiful confession, in which she cries how she couldnāt save himiko, that izuku noticed, and that heāll call her his hero and theyāll kiss. And I canāt help but feel like this is bc he is the boy. Because he is the boy in that ship, he is the one that supports, not gets supported. When I was reading those little scenarios, I thought they would explain deku would cry with her about his own fight and bond over it, or something like that. But noā¦ they believe dekuās strange reactions come from being worried over Ochako only. and itās so sad, to see how gender expectations are being pushed like that in something as simple as a ļæ½ļæ½what I want to happen in the mangaā scenario. Itās sad how people think this is how it should work, when actually that would make me even sadder -as I said, for the most part I didnāt care about that ship, I accepted it as inevitable, but this isnāt fair. Romance irl is not perfect, but in a story for this to be a resolution when the character who hasnāt talked about his feeling keeps not talking about them and just supports her before confessingā¦
Even hetero relationships should have some balance, right?
EDIT:
someone brought up bkdk lmao. They explained how the confession from ochako could get answered: happy ending is izuku loving her back, bad ending is him saying he likes katsuki, and medium ending him liking mei. I canāt even lmao.
another person argued deli just has shown a brotherly bond with him (weird) and that he only thought of him at that dinner with the Im too blessed, and the last time he followed him was in season 1. people need to learn how to read, and connect the dots, literally. No matter how you see their relationship in canon as platonic or romantic (or queer platonic), itās clear their bond is strong and that Izuku depends on katsuki as much as katsuki depends on izuku on emotional levels -izuku losing control over and over and over again with him, AFO explaining he is the closest to midoriya, katsuki going towards him no matter how injured he is, looking for each other and the time stops, etc.
this is just canon. Thereās no arguing about it. Idk why intimate bonds between two male characters means they are like brothers. Is it bc if they are not related, thereās no way to not see it as gay?/gen but also /s
#grrr talking#I want to make another post about the ways Izu//ocha could have been developed easily#Like extremely easily#What was the reason to give the thing that was supposed to connect ochako to deku#To himiko and ochako#What was the reason to also make that connection an all might keychain which doesnāt hold any weight for her bc sheās not a huge am fan#Why having himiko grab that symbol they now share and cover it completely with her hand#Why not giving izuku another physical symbol of her#Why bringing up the childhood cards instead when we almost knew nothing about them#Why have them be explicitly connected to each other thru a dream they have to share together for it to be worth it#For bkdk to become friends again they didnāt need all of this#You donāt need to share your life n be connected to someone in order to become friends again#Or to atone for the bullying#They could have been shown working to be friends ever since the apology#And have small moments of them trying to just be that#And focus those big efforts into izu////ocha scenes#But no#we get this shit#Wtf#the contrast between Izuku reuniting with Katsuki vs with Ochako is a lot#N it could have been more implied the romance!#Like have him be surprised instead of just sad -it would show he notices she is acting weird n gets worried bc of it#Or have ochako show a bittersweet face like saying pls deku kun donāt make me say it now#So many options and yet#They donāt get disappointed bc itās a het ship n they believe that makes it canon#JUST LIKE WITH FUCKING TODO///MOMO LIKE ITS CUTE IDC BUT HOW CAN YOU THINK THAT MAKES SENSE FOR CANON#No problem with these fanon ships bUT WHEN THEY ACT LIKE THEY ARE REAL N THE REST R āDELUSIONALā
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There's honestly... just so many people, just so so so so so many people in this world where I'm like... aren't you people tired of this fucking... you know, I was going to call them clowns but that's really disrespectful to clowns, these people could never get their face on an egg...
Anyway, aren't you tired of this childish jackass? Don't you just want to ignore them and never have to hear about them again? If we just ignored them they legitimately would go away... don't you want that?
And this applies to... just ungodly amounts of people, from jake paul to even elon musk (just... don't touch his shit, he'll run out of money eventually with how bad he is with it), to just... name an annoying famous person and you'll name someone I've literally forgotten right now that I could never have to hear about again if people would just ignore them (unless they committed crimes, investigators are welcome to pay attention while gathering a case)
Yet the answer's always "no, we're paying so much attention to them!" and I'm just like... why? Why would you watch jake paul box? I heard about that and was like "he's still doing that shit?", and yet I guess it made a lot of money yet again and it's just like... ignore him
These people could go away, and yet
#to be blunt this is also very very very much about trump#the best part of all if he'd lost is how I'd never have had to see or hear about his loser ass again#and you people couldn't even manage that (collective you; not you personally... unless you're Pennsylvanian basically)#like he's insufferable... unless you're a die hard fan of him you know he's just stupid and annoying#why would you want to hear a washed up reality star for four more fucking years?#we could ignore these people hard enough to make them go away#and yet I'll be stuck having to hear him say shit about Hannibal or whatever for four more years cause you couldn't do that#I'm so sick of it; I honestly am#jake paul could have been ignored into obscurity like a decade ago; and yet he's able to launch a scam with mr beast#like dear god... can't you people find something better to do than watch these people? ...like watch paint dry?#it's not just people; it's every live action disney remake; it's... it's just all of it... fucking ai#can't you people fucking ignore it? can't you just kinda boo when it shows up and then forget about it?#I get someone like elon is a toddler that needs an eye kept on him to make sure he's not breaking shit but like...#we could just not buy his cars... which... like... doesn't seem like a hard ask given how badly they're manufactured#again... weirdos on tumblr; I'm doubting you're to blame for most of this#but just like... could we just for the love of god let the stupid shit die out you losers?#I'm not even... I'm not even joking here; this isn't like a goof; this is a prescription#nfts die if literally everyone ignores them; live action remakes die if no one watches them; elon goes bankrupt if no one buys from him#(also gets really sad because he's a massive attention seeker; and that's pretty funny so bonus)#why do I still have to hear about jake paul other than like... 'he's been arrested for fraud' or something reasonable?#could have been done with him years ago... like maybe if you kept around one or two bad habits but... like the lootboxes couldn't go?#tune in; turn on; drop out... this part here; I'm asking you to do the drop out part#drop out of society and stop playing their bullshit games#pay attention; be engaged with the world and your community as best you can; and just stop... stop giving this shit oxygen#but again... if this isn't hitting the void it's probably hitting the choir... you're not an oaf on twitter sucking this stuff up#but fuck me... worry over tariffs and other shit aside; concrete quantifiable worries I can lay out I might add#for the people who act like it's just sky is falling mentality; nah... I can expressly say what and why I worry about come january#but all that aside... you couldn't have voted against him just... just to never hear his annoying ass again?#not saying harris would have been good or bad or anything else... I'm saying she would have been a fuck of a lot less annoying#and like... you gave elon a win too... the two most annoying people on the planet and ya couldn't just... not
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#today I am sad about something that I know objectively is dumb#my 30th birthday is next week and the party will be next Saturday and Iām having a dinner at a nice restaurant in town#I wasnāt supposed to make it to 30 and never thought I would but now somehow I have and so this birthday is likeā¦#a really huge deal to me you know#and I always wanted to be able to have a big party to celebrate this specific occasion and in my head I pictured all my friends/family there#I figured this would be one of the biggest parties Iād ever get to throw because to me this is the biggest milestone Iāve gotten to so far#but out of all the people Iāve invited the most that will probably reasonably show is about 10#and even thatās a bit iffy because tbh Iām pretty sure my bestie will flake on me like he always does#and if he doesnāt show up that might just end the friendship but thatās another matter entirely#also iffy because I havenāt gotten a lot of responses still even though I made the event and sent invites two weeks ago#I justā¦ thought I had more friends than that if that makes sense#like I had bigger parties with more people attending in high school and I barely had any friends then#Iāve thrown low key Halloween parties in my momās apartment that had more people show up#now Iām at the most important moment of my life (so far) and Iāll barely have anyone with me#lately it just feels like less and less people care about me for real despite how many I know around work or how many are on my Facebook#it feels like my world keeps shrinking and I really donāt want that because itās been small enough as it is#I just feel like Iām never really going to find my place or have big groups of friends like everyone else#Iām never going to have a group of friends or people I can rely on to spend time with me when needed#as it is planning things gets harder the older we get anyway just due to needing to tend to adult life#guess I still just want what everyone else has and I donāt know why I canāt have those things#and I know itās stupid and selfish and whiny but I really want to cry because Iām so depressed that I have barely anyone in my life at all#barely anyone to celebrate something so important to me and so few who even seem to care at all either#Iām grateful for everyone I do have honestly#but that doesnāt offset this weird pain in my chest over this whole situation#maybe I should just curl up and cry until this all passes and I can go back to pretending it doesnāt matter#personal
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Hearing some thoughts on Rin's lines about Clear Wing.
I don't disagree that it feels off-putting or wrong (whichever you prefer to describe it as), but I imagine her reasoning doesn't necessarily boil down to seeing herself as above Yuugo (though it's very possible it partially is; they both lived in a dog eat dog world - the City - and they're commons to boot - so they're fighting one another to duel Jack up until she's kidnapped, even if Yuugo says they were going to do it together), as much as it boils down to her being the responsible one.
Yuugo really isn't, so it might possibly be that, given how dependable of a monster Clear Wing (and Crystal Wing) are, Rin thinks her burn deck is a better fit for such a monster than Yuugo's luck based deck. The answer to this is obviously no as soon as anything to do with Zarc or Ray comes into the picture (Clear Wing and Yuugo are both cut from the same quarter of the Supreme King Dragon, even if it was by En Winds.)
Or, Rin is probably jealous she doesn't have effect negation in her monsters, and is bullying Yuugo about it because she's seemingly never really dealt with her frustrations in any other way (because Yuugo's always there.) Or maybe because Clear Wing is a unique card and Rin wants a copy too.
Alternatively, this is somehow the same thing as Yuuri's sadistic streak; a hold over from their Original self, and Ray decided Clear Wing should've been one of her monsters. As if Zarc would lose one of his dragons without a fight, though.
(Additional note I think is important but couldn't figure out where to put it in; Rin's defeat line in the overworld implies to me that Yuugo expects her to win her matches, like it shouldn't be hard for her. Yuugo's never gotten angry at her even if she's gotten angry at him multiple times and she's probably afraid of what he'd think - either this hasn't happened and she's worried all his frustrations with her would ungracefully tumble out, only putting up with her because she wins and can get food on their table even if we know that wouldn't happen - he loves her so much he'll ramble about her to anyone given half a chance, or it has happened before and Rin doesn't want to experience that sort of thing again, as though it would embarrass her.) (So her self esteem is either rock bottom when it comes to losing. or she's got too much pride to admit any of her losses to the one person who adores her)
#marwospeaking#The City done fucked up these two kids. they gotta win or they're considered nothing more than dirt at the bottom of the slums#Not excusing her at all on this though. it really is rude of her. but it does present an opportunity to explore what's going on in her head#You know its bad when. out of the two responsible ones. Yuuto is somehow the less mean one. Rin what the hell#It's also possible these are things she'd never actually say in front of Yuugo. but DL doesn't have that so she says these words anyway#(she might not have ever wanted to voice that opinion either. but DL has her do so anyway)#I wonder how Clear Wing feels on this; She is more than dependable in getting a 7 out. designed to do that even#(which makes me think that Ray wanted to get a hold of Clear Wing - none of the others can intertwine their decks so easily..#.. so what reason/s could there be for that? other than it's the easy option for a character who only physically shows up in the last..#.. stretch of Arc V.)#But as There For Yuugo as Rin can/could be. she's still a part of Ray in the end. and Clear Wing is still scared of Ray from the last time.#I am willing to give DL the benefit of the doubt that Rin's feelings might be made clearer. and that this is just misdirection by omission#but this event also has Ruri to contend with. so I can only get so optimistic about Rin's character exploration here#on an unrelated but related note. Rin *please* just let Yuugo hug you. even just once. He missed you more than he'd miss anything else#Seeing him get nothing but kneed in the gut for wanting to hug Rin makes me more and more sad for his situation
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i have no idea if the oldgen/newgen osc debate has reached tumblr at all but all i gotta say is that if you're complaining about younger fans in a fandom space that has From The Beginning always been most attractive to tweens online then you kinda just look stupid im afraid
#like good god i'm sorry people talk about animatic battle instead of brawl of the objects now#have you considered more people will be willing to listen to you recommend brawl of the objects if you're not condescending them 24/7#it is not that hard to be nice to strangers#bri talks#osc twitter is so miserable all the time i gotta mute more people or im gonna go insane#brifdi#ngl dude if you actually cannot stand anything the osc has cooked up after 2019 then like.#im sorry but you might have to just confront the idea you only still like object shows out of nostalgia and your taste has changed#like i know that's sad but blaming the community for it just makes you angry for no reason
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? what the fuck was that finale
#so. just finished Hazbin Hotel#and to he honest? 6/10 overall#but like what was that ending?? shit just Happens#and like#it's cool and all#I liked seeing Lucifer beat the shit out of Adam with the power of whimsy#but everything else felt like a power point presentation of cool stuff they wanted to show the character doing#also#Sir Pentious us one of my favorite characters so there might be some bias here but#his death was handled very sloppily#like I didn't know if I was supposed to feel sad or just laugh#Adam just fucking Evaporates him and throws a one liner and then they play emotional music and Charlie is crying and I'm like#huh ?#like I thought he was gonna come out of the rubble eventually#good on him for ending up in Heaven btw my absolute GOAT#I do have to admit that I am very much invested in whatever the fuck Alastor has going on#but other than that I care not for season 2#kudos to Lucifer and Pentious for being the only characters I actually liked and honorable mention to Nifty for being the reason I laughed#for the edgy hell show I'm surprised that the only highlights of my experience with it were the silly characters lol#anyway. rant over? rant over.#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel spoilers
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Lo. Love your Rejuv art. Just wanted to ask if you have more ideas for the au where nothing goes wrong (lie) for PokƩmon Rejuvenation.
thank you!! and im sorry to say i do not! im very bad at coming up with ideas but i would love to hear others ideas on anything, though i will say when i started posting about it i had a brief thought of flora, florin, and talon taking melia and the protag with them to terajuma when they cheak out the tyluric temple as like a way for them to. get to terajuma. but idk how well thatd work out continuity wise. or what the whole terajuma arc would be like because of it
#thinking about it makes me sad though melia wouldve never met crawli thats so sad to me.. the buddiesā¦#anyway uh#something something i was originally thinking of it like. everything that happens still sorta happens just out of order kinda ? maybe ??#i dont really know ā¦.#i still really like the idea though so maybe hopefully i can think of something to jot down#that and i. dont know if blacksteeple would even.. happen ?#like as in akuwa town would be fine and saki val and adam are still there i guess ?#because xen didnt attack goldenwood forrest and the protag never shows up to goldenleaf#oh and the caratos mountain thing never wouldve happened#so they wouldnt really need a reason to keep akuwa town held captive. but idk about the ss oceana passengers#maybe theyre still thereā¦ i have no idea how they would escape though#though as a whole earlier i was thinking of it as like a . what if melia never went back in time. kind of thing ?#but thats mostly from the favt that i cant. really think of any way spacea and tiempa could corner her like they do in amethyst cave#idk i think i need to play love lies finally to maybe understand certain things that are making me unable to really think about it#namely those evil androids who are kind of like the whole reason anything and everything bad happened . i think. idk.#the overall timeline of things is whats getting to me#i think i might be overthinking it all though#oops#oh okay maybe i do have some ideas this is more than i thought i had. sorry#im very unsure about everything though! and no idea how id draw any of it!#thank you again for saying you like it though :] maybe ill be able to come up with something randomly in like a couple months or something
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i keep getting irrationally miffed at ppl šš
#'impressed by how much u can talk abt this considering youve not played either game'#fuck off. as if im not just trying to show interest bc u + another friend are both into them + constantly talk abt them in our gc!!#i mean since u guys talk abt them all the time + theyre huge on tumblr like. it would be hard for me to not know anything abt them at all#literally what else can i talk to u guys abt anyway. i dont think there are any interests i personally have that they both gaf abt#if anything they actively dislike most of the things im hyperfixated on. or at least she does so like i cant bring that up can i.#all i did was share a post i saw on tumblr that i thought was funny. its not like i had some negative/controversial opinion#i just saw it and thought hey that makes me think of my friends bc they like those things maybe theyll find it funny too!!#dog sitting outside the door with rly big sad eyes offering them a stick i found in a puddle#i like listening to them talk and i will eventually play some of the games theyre into myself cuz they make them sound rly cool#and even if theyre not my kind of thing i like sharing interests with other ppl and sometimes thats enough for me to be able to enjoy it#i literally own some of them already but im just not in the mental space to start smth new right now. which i have SAID!!!!#why do u even care girl. as if u dont already have a ton of friends playing it that ur talking to abt it???? i wont have anything to add#and thats not gonna stop u from being able to talk to me abt it anyway????? like 2/3 of our conversations atm are abt bg3#man. i know its not that deep but it makes me kinda sad for some reason. im just trying. i guess next time ill just let u guys talk-#to each other or at me and not comment or say anything so u can pretend im not here or whatever it is u want#ughh. she probably didnt even mean it like that and ill feel stupid for getting annoyed and delete this later but whatever.#might work out early today and then i can like draw or play a game or smth the rest of the day. alright lets go#.vent#listening to my silly little jfunk/jazz/soul playlist and i already feel over it. healing
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The social pressure of getting Facebook invitations to concerts and events by The Cool Friend šš
#do you have any idea how many he sent me over the course of this year and the summer specifically???#and i only went to two because i had tickets anyway and otherwise there were either floods or i or someone in my family was sick#or it was in the middle of the week etc which is super sad because they all sounded so cool omg but yeah šš#i absolutely would have gone to see spread eagle and toxic rose but noooo i had to catch the fucking flu šš#tbh i havenāt heard of this band he booked to which he invited me but it must be smth up my alley since he knows my taste to some extent#also clicked interested on the next karaoke show because the last ones were on days i already had plans for or failed for reasons above#so yeah i Might get to go to my third concert of the year now i guess#the band is the bellrays? tell me if you know them#okay i checked them out and they're sooo good and they have a female vocalist!!!#mel talks
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