#and that was only part of the dream btw the graphics were really good in the game as well the sound design mwah mwah

[dan-crimes]

I hate the creativity my dream mind has because I rarely have dreams and my dreams tend to be the most thought out creative things I've seen myself create just fully functioning game ideas or murder mystery type deals or just complex storylines or even just fully self indulgent crossovers with cartoon characters lmao and it makes me UPSET bcuz I can never think of that stuff while I'm AWAKE so I think my dreams are sucking up all my creativity

[sterredem]

Hey, I can't find if your requests are open (if they aren't please ignore this). Can you do an arthur leclerc x fem!driver!reader where she gets into f1 and he doesn't (angst!!) and she comforts him?

Unfair

First ending

Face claim: Pinterest girls/Barbara Palvin/Bianca Bustamante + other women in motorsport.

(That I use these people doesn’t mean that I know or support them, I just use them because Barbara has a lot of good pictures in the spoor and Bianca has good pictures in the car and on the podium)

Summary: The request

Word count: 2549

Warning: Angst, lying(?), happy ending, fluff at the end

A/N: this took a bit to write but u really like it. It is a bit different then the request (a bit more Angsty) but I think it is my best yet (which isn’t hard with this being my 3rd fic). I hope you enjoy and don’t forget to like/comment/repost and please give me feedback🫶🫶 Btw sorry for the long wait.

The other ending will be posted soon!

Also I hope you like the graphics, it took literally hours to make😭😭

They both knew that this could happen. That was the risk with dating your coworker in a motorsport. And especially formula 2.

So when y/n heard that next season she would drive in formula 1 with Porsche, she was really excited. Of course she was. She was going to be the first Women in a few decades to drive in Formula 1. And for a relatively new but very good team. With Porsche being in F1 since the 2019 seasons it was the newest, but unlike HAAS they were actually good.

And she was happy that she got a contract. She would drive a few of the best names of motorstoprt. And her team printable, Sebastian Vettel had promised her big things.

But when she actually thought about what this all meant she begun to get scared. She would need to tell Arthur. Arthur who always wanted to be in Formula 1. Arthur who is her best friend and her boyfriend.

How could she tell him? How could she tell him that she would get to live their dream? How could she tell him that he would drive alongside his brother before him?

This was all a mess. And the worst part was that she sined a NDA so she couldn’t tell him until the announcement was up. The only people that currently knew where; her family, her trainer and her manager.

She tried to do everything she could so she can tell him. But she just couldn’t, so she needs to live with a big secret for a few months. And when it is announced that she would go to Formula 1 she doesn’t know is he will ever forgive her.

And not only because she didn’t tell him and they promised they would tell each other everything. No but because they promised to get there together, to both get into F1. And now, Y/n would get to drive there and Arthur would be left behind in F2.

So she would need to live a secret until it was revealed to the world. The only thing she could get out of the contact is that she could tell Arthur a day before the announcement. Which she still wasn’t happy about but it was something. So when the time came to finally tell him she was a nervous wreck. Understandable.

The day before the announcement finally came. And Y/n was really nervous. So when Arthur finally came home she made some of his favourite food and got mentally ready to tell him.

And to say Arthur was confused was an understatement. He came home to his girlfriend cooking his favourite food and looking very nervous. So of course he was worried. Would she brake up with him? Dis something happen? But he wanted to wait for her to say something. And that happens after they were done doing the dishes and were laying in the couch.

“Hey Arthur can we talk?” Y/n nervously while playing with her fingers and not really looking at Arthur.

“Yes mon ange what is wrong?” Arthur asked relieved that she will finally talk about what is wrong. He tried to look at her but couldn’t lock eyes.

“Promise me you will hear me out before you react of get mad.” She said while finally looking in his eyes. But they aren’t filled with the usual adoration or love, no the where filled with nerves and a bit of fear.

“Of course mon ange. What is going on?” He asked growing more and more worried. While trying to grapple with his hand. And failing.

“So you know that PREMA is dropping me right? Well when it was announced some people reached out to me and offers me something…” she slowly said while looking at him for his reaction.

“Well one of those people was Sebastian Vettel and he offered me a place on Porche in Formula 1. And as you can understand I couldn’t refuse, so we got talking and they gave me an amazing offer.” She said while looking at his reaction. Which wasn’t the best, it got from worry to confusion to some sort of mild anger.

“So last August he gave me a contract and I signed it…” she said falling a bit silent at the end. And before Arthur could talk she began again.

“And I really wanted to tell you before, really. But they made me sign a NDA and I could only tell my manager and close family and some of the other team for legal reasons. And I tried everything, and initially I could not tell you until the announcement but I made a deal and I could tell you the day before. And now that is, so today is the day before. And again I am so sorry. Please don’t be mad.” She ranted while tears formed in his eyes while seeing him become more and more mad.

“Y/n… what? Is this some sick joke?” He asked while slowly fake laughing and looking at her with betrayal in his eyes.

“Baby please understand that I could not tell you.” She said slowly looking away.

“Don’t baby me! I know you couldn’t tell me after the contract, but you could tell me that you had an offer! And how could you take it? You know how much I want to get into F1?” He asked with betrayal in his voice.

“What was I supposed to do? Not take the offer and never get in Formula 1 just so you could have it or that we could go at the same time? And I could not tell you about the offer because I didn’t even know until I talked with Sebastian, my manager hid it from me because he didn’t want to get my hopes up!” She said now with tears going down her cheeks.

“I understand that but please! Did you even think about me?” He asked a bit louder.

“Of course I did! I just told you! I wanted to tell you the minute I got the offer! But I couldn’t because of that stupid team! I wanted to you to have a seat for F1! For whatever team, but I can’t! If I can I would give you my seat! But Arthur you need to understand that I need to think of myself sometimes! This a big deal for me! I will be the first women in Formula 1 in a few decades, and I will be the first women to be in the middle or upper field! I could be the first to be in a podium of even win!” She said now almost fully crying.

Arthur was silent for a bit while thinking about what she said. “Y/n i know all that. But you also need to understand that it is hard for me. Charles is in F1, Ferrarie dropped me, Jules and my dad died and wanted me and Charlie to drive, and now my girlfriend, who is also my childhood best friend, lied to me for months and you expect me to be okay with it? Merde Y/n you can’t expect this from me. I think I need some time alone.” He said trying to stay calm with tears in his eyes.

Y/n looked at his shocked about what he said. Did he want to break up? Did he want a part time break? Was he going to leave? She knows that she can’t hold him accountable for it, she did lie to him after all.

“Arthur please. I understand what you say. And I don’t hold you accountable for that, but please don’t leave.” She said now with them both full on crying.

“Mon amour, I won’t leave you, I am just going to go to my mom for a bit. Think about everything and then we can talk about this in a few days.” He said while wiping her tears away.

He slowly stood up and walked to there room to grab a few of his things. She still sat on the couch thinking if she should stop him or just let him go.

She decided on the later one, because it was better to give him time to think about it before things were said that they don’t mean.

A few minutes later Arthur came downstairs with a bag of his stuff. He grabbed his coat and keys and looked at Y/n again. “I will message you when I am there. Please understand that I still love you and I am not breaking up, but I just need some time.” He says with a half smile.

“I understand, please take all the time you need. And when you are ready to talk I am here.” She said while also half smiling with more tears forming in her eyes. “I love you, please be safe”

“I will” he says while walking out of the door and closing it. Y/n slowly slid down the wall with her head in her hands thinking everything over again.

Was this the right thing? Was she selfish for accepting the offer? Would she lose Arthur? Were they ever going to recover?

With all this on het mind she slowly stood up and walked upstairs. She got into the bathroom and did her night routine. After that she looked at the time and saw how early it still was so she decided to just watch some Gilmore Girls (you can chose whatever this is just my comfort series) while laying in bed trying to distract her from the argument they had earlier.

After watching it for a few hours she decided that it was getting late and decided to sleep and see what the day would bring tomorrow. The day that it would be announced.

Instagram

Liked by Susie_Wolff and 3.115.785 others

F1 BREAKING: Y/n y/l/n will be driving for Porsche the 2025 season!

We all welcome her to the grid and are excited to see her!

#y/n_y/l/n #Porsche #F1 @Y/n_y/l/n @Porsche

Comments

User1 OMG I AM SO EXITED

User2 so happy to see she got a seat after PREMA dropped her

Susie_Wolff So happy for you! I am happy to see more girls in Formula 1

Yourusername Thank you Susie! Exited to see you again!

Yourusername I am so happy and thankful for this opportunity!

User3 we got a women in f1 before gta 6

User4 So exited for more women in motorsports!

User5 women shouldn’t be in motorsports! It is a man dominated sport for a reason!

User6 why is Arthur not simping over his girlfriend like usual?!

User7 he could just be congratulating het irl don’t make a big deal out of this

User8 I agree with user7, just because he isn’t in the comments on a insta post doesn’t mean something happened. We shouldn’t speculate on there lives with absolutely no information about them at the moment.

After the announcement was finally up Y/n felt worst then the slash before. Her and Arthur still hadn’t talked. And it welt like weeks (it was only 10 hours). She missed him, missed his laugh, his boyish smile, their useless conversation for hours, his kisses and hugs. Everything.

So when she finally got a massage from him she was happy to say the least.

|———————————<3—————————————|

See you then*

|———————————<3—————————————|

For the next part there is a bit of explaining necessary. You can: keep reading this and then you have how the request is (with a fluffy ending and comforting) OR you can klick in the link and that will take you to the alternative ending (you will need to scroll down again until this part and then you have the Angsty ending)

Angsty ending

|———————————<3—————————————|

After a few more massages back and forth they decided to meet up at their house instead of the cafe. So when the next day came she waited for Arthur to come back.

After a few hours of watching Gilmore Girls she heard the front door open. She paused the show and stood up from her bed, she walked downstairs and came face to face with Arthur.

“Hey” she said a bit awkwardly. She looked in his eyes and saw that he looked very tired and had red eyes. He had probably cried, the same with her.

“Hey, how are you?” He asked with a tired and raspy voice and the French accent.

“I’m doing okay. Want something to drink?” She asked trying to fill the awkward silence.

“No I’m fine. Could we just talk? I think it is the best if we just get it over.” He said trying to get to the point as fast as he can so they could make up again. He had missed her a lot, while he was at his maman she had given his a long and good scolding for leaving her and not listening her out. He realised that it was indeed a bad choice to leave her, he was just angry and upset so he did the only rational thing in his mind.

“Yeah of course.” She said while slowly walking to the living room. She looked back at him to see if he followed her and he did. She walked to the couch and sat on one end of it, wanting him to decide if he wants to sit next to her or far away from her.

He sat next to her.

“Okay so first of I want to say I am so sorry that I left, I know it was the wrong thing to do. But I was just angry, confused and upset with everything and then I said stuff and you said stuff and I just couldn’t anymore. But now I am ready to hear you out.” He said tampering a bit while fiddling with his hands.

“I understand that and it is completely okay, again I am really sorry I didn’t tell you but I can explain it to you.” She said while looking in his eyes.

“Okay so as I said; Kate, my manager, got a lot of offers from teams after my contract with PREMA expired, but she didn’t want to get my hopes up so she told me nothing. I only knew about it when she set up a meeting with Sebastian, we talked and he had a really good offer. A long contract, good money, good car and a good team. So I couldn’t say no. But then it came to PR and telling people, I asked who u could tell and I could only tell my team and my parents, I couldn’t even tell my siblings or friends. I asked if I could tell you but I couldn’t, they wanted to keep it low-key so that it would be a big surprise. The only thing I fixed is that I could tell you the day before. So I did and you know how that turned out. I really wanted to tell you but I also needed to sign a NDA so I couldn’t tell you about the contract or the car. And this may sound really bad and it may sound like I chose a bad team but no; they only did it to protect us. Me because if it came out before there could be serious danger for me. And for you so you could many still enjoy F2 and get into you’re dream team. But now I realise that how I handled it was really wrong and I am so sorry. I hope you can forgive me because I really missed you.” She said the last part a bit out of breath.

Arthur looked to be deep in thought. He thought about everything she said. And he understood it. But now he was really upset with how he reacted.

“Mon amour I am so sorry. I should have heard you out earlier” he said while grabbing her face. “I and so sorry for how I reacted. I hope you can understand why. I as just confused, jealous and upset. I was confused because for me it came all of a sudden and upset because again why would you tell me? And I was really jealous because you wou get to be in F1 and drive with my brother before me.”

“I completely understand my love, and I understand it about the jealous part, I would too.” She said while grabbing his face.

After talking for a few more minutes they decided to go to the bedroom and watch something.

“Hey love do you want to watch that French series that you talked about?” Y/n asked while playing with his hair and cuddling.

“Yeah for sure mon amour” he said with a smile on his face. He looked up at her and admired her beauty. “You looked beautiful ma belle” he said with a slight blush.

“She looked down at his and smiles “wel thank you handsome. You don’t look that bad yourself.” She said blushing.

After watching a few episodes of the show and talking they decided to go to sleep.

But before she fell asleep she heard Arthur whisper something.

“Je t'aime mon amour, merci pour tout.” (I love you my love, thank you for everything.)

[theclosetedskeleton]

please infodump about your damn skippy oc please i beg

YAHSHANXNABX YAYAYAYAY

okay here we go

I dont have an uhh actual name for the oc (yet), ill try to think about one soon. Anyways

He's (obv referring to my damn skippy oc) energetic and constantly moving around the place. Damn skippy oc try to sit still in one place (failed INSTANTLY).

+ "Naturally curious (Good example for this idea would be the song "rainwater") and lives in their daydreams" kinda person. (When robots attack) (ik theres the line 'how i wish this was just a dream' in when robots attack, but I imagine the scenario wasnt a "daydream" he has and moreso of an actual dream that feels real.)

[going back to the last part, I imagine the entire damn skippy album is just the oc going on these silly tangents abt their life + daydreams (maybe minus "ode to crayola", as I already have a diff oc for that song alone)]

Pronouns - He/they (Was originally gonna go with he/him but i like the concept of "he/they DS oc better)

Physical features !!!

DS has these swirls in their eyes, like the back of the album cover. Confession - Every now and then i think the pinkish color makes him look high but then i add the blue and im like "nuh uh" HWKAN 😭

They also have these star pupils, I added the idea when i first designed the oc back in jan-feb time period. Btw these features arent like contact lenses those are his actual eyes :3 I imagine my DS oc to be like... 80% human and the 20% is uhhh I dont know that answer

Along with this, theres like this ink or whatever that seeps from his eyes. Theyre not tears or anything, no matter what they do to remove the ink it just comes back eventually, but the ink only gets down to a certain point to where it just stops flowing.

small features !!! he wears a lot of stickers on their face, mainly because the stickers are really cool

LOTS of kandi bracelets/wrist bands/spiked bracelets. There probably was a time where he was a scene kid, and they still take inspiration from that 2000s/2010s scene time period.

[side note!!! this doesnt relate with my oc 100% but

on the topic of the kandi bracelets part, DS makes a lot of kandi bracelets for HTTJB (another oc based on a LD album) (The hip to the javabean oc isnt my oc, its @shrimpmcbites 's). Occasionally DS will just give HTTJB a new kandi bracelet for no apparent reason. ]

LOTS OF COLOR !!!!!!!! DS constantly wears so many things dealing with color and bright things, like as if those saturated bright colorful photos were a person.

DS IS TRANS!!!!!! trans ftm to be specific. fuck making all my characters different.... i WILL project on every one of them

(on a specific note, DS hasnt gotten any sort of medical transition like HRT or top/bottom surgery)

Projecting on my oc once more !!!! but fuck i dont care - DS is aroace and queerplatonic !!!! + DS is also in a qpr W/HTTJB because me and @shrimpmcbites said so muahaha (we are both projecting...)

(Geeks is love is abt them !!!!! the line "I don't think they'll ever get the groovy standards that we set for love" fits oh so perfectly with the fact the DS and HTTJB oc's are in a qpr)

Okay now for a bit of silly facts

Favorite drink - Tea !!! of any kind !!!! or maybe koolaid or the type of water drinks where you pour the syrup of a flavor in water and you get juice if yk what im talking abt

Favorite food - I imagine DS to really like smores. especially the ones with too much extra stuff and too many marshmellows and chocolate

Favorite type of music - anything DS can dance to. or just move around to. He doesn't really like sad songs.

Favorite color -Probably all of them but mainly the really saturated BRIGHT colors

Hobbies -

Dancing (not really good at it, + is not a professional, they just do it bc he NEEDS a way to channel all of the internal energy they have.),

Reading (only comic/graphic novels, anything else and he just loses attention)

KANDI - They has SO. MANY. KANDI. STUFF. AT HOME. probably even a few pieces of kandi clothing because of all of the extra time they have on his hands.

Video games - Esp those really retro ones, but he'll play almost any video game that goes in their hands

HOLY SHIT THIS POST IS SO LONG. idk what else to add but if anyone reads this till the end and has any input about the oc send me an ask about it because my DS oc (and @shrimpmcbites 's HTTJB oc) has been CLAWING at my brain and i need people to talk to me about them

[strange-and-dynamic]

Dateline: October 4th, 2024

Had a dream last night that was about several things (like how most if not all of my dreams are) but the main and biggest part I can remember of it, is about a 90s anime style side scroller beat em up! And I was the character designer for it!

This chapter of the definitely dream had a whole lot of brown featured in it (thus why I chose the brown dividers, dividers by @/dollywons btw!! Def go check her out her graphics are so pretty!!!) and searching up the meaning of the color brown in a dream states it symbolizes groundedness, warmth, and comfort, all of which I need rn, so that feels good (´▽`)

Anyways! Onto the main aspects of the dream!

I was the main (and only) character designer, on a small team consisting of me, the coder, and the music producer, I was on a phone call with one of those 2, as she was my friend, and said friend called me to be the character designer

The gameplay I could see of it was like streets of rage, but the artstyle was a 90s anime style reminiscent of 90s Clamp and little enemies that look like they’re from sexy parodius

And now on to the part that I’m most excited about; THE MAIN CHARACTERS!! I was able to remember them well enough once waking up for me to quickly type out their characteristics into my notes app! I, obviously, can’t remember them perfectly, since a character design isn’t just something I remember clear as day from my dreams, but I remember 3 of them well enough!

Get ready cuz this list is long girl,,,

Character 1, the main character • Long platinum blonde hair, bangs swoop to the left (viewer’s left) • Yellow eyes • Skin was tan • Costume cat paws (both hand and foot paws) bikini top and bottom, and cat ear headband, all fluffy and were a milk chocolate brown, no cat tail included • Wielded a normal, wooden baseball bat • Hands underneath the cat paws are pitch black and clawed, reminiscent of raccoon paws

�� °❈° ≫≪ °❈° ≫

2nd character • Mid length brown hair, spiky pigtails • Eyebrows usually furrowed, was the childish fiery personality one • Had a normal long sleeve Japanese schoolgirl sailor uniform on • Civilian clothes was a white polo dress with blue accents • Brown eyes

≪ °❈° ≫≪ °❈° ≫

3rd character • I can’t remember a single thing about specifically her for some reason, other than her hair being straight and long with blunt bangs, and possibly a deep brown or black

≪ °❈° ≫≪ °❈° ≫

4th character • Was the fat kinda jokey character, loved food • Her name was Han (pronounced Hah-n, think of Usahana) shes the only one I can remember the name of because Dreams™ • Only got pulled to help in the groups battles because of flattery from character 2 • Had the same outfit as character 2, but skirt was either a blue or green plaid instead • Long brown hair, same shade of brown as character 2 (maybe they're sisters? 🤔) • Can’t remember if eyes were black or brown

≪ °❈° ≫≪ °❈° ≫

That's all the playable characters! In the context of the dream, you'd steadily unlock them by just going through the campaign, which really thinking about how little you need to do (You start out with 2 playable characters, the main and character 2, and then unlock characters 3 and 4 far before you reach the final boss) this beat em must be a pretty fun game to get 4 friends on!

little tibits I can remember from the Inset Dream Context™:

There was this art I drew of the main character standing in the foreground with her aforementioned baseball bat, one hand (paw?) on her hip and looking triumphantly to her left, with the HUGE roster of bosses and enemies all behind her, not defeated but just kinda there, I either drew this as promotional art or box art

-> I really want to recreate this memory!! As well the main's design ref too!

I keep remembering this little cartoony elephant in the bottom corner of the box art, he was one of the bosses!

All playable character are girls, and judging by the continuous school uniforms, they all went to the same school, though the main character could also be older than the others and not attending school, judging by the fact character 2, her best friend, is shorter than her and mainly wearing the schoolgirl fit, and character 1 is never seen out of that cat bikini thing

Alright, that's it for this post! If you read all the way to down here, tysssm for reading!! Have a good night (´ ∀ ` *)

[dragonwysper]

Oh yeah I'm in a music psychology class and our first assignment (afaik) was to make a short presentation on six songs that describe our lives. I wanted to share those, so here y'all go

This sounds like the woods to me, and those were a fundamental part of my childhood and a big influence in how I see the world. Also I really wanted to sneak a bit of dronescape (or dronescape adjacent) music into there lmao

My fucked up journey with my gender identity. It was. An Interesting phase. I'm not super proud of it, but it was a very chaotic time for me in a lot of ways. I was suffering with severe dysphoria, and since I didn't know why, I blamed everybody else. Throw in a few really toxic friends and influences I had, and. Yeah. Good song though lmao

Internet trauma go brrrrrrr. This is very much one of two (2) medias that I feel reflect what the internet is most clearly (the other one being Bolavlk by sournoodl). Fun song and describes a huuuuge portion of my trauma.

Threw this one in for a lot of reasons. Mainly, this song is an excellent tribute to horror as a genre (especially horror films), and horror has been the most influential genre for me. Highkey began with an interest in Creepypastas as a middle schooler, which turned into fucked up creature design, which turned into horror movies and other media. Harley Poe has some excellent horror songs.

This one is just very mecore, especially like. Post-trauma, and currently after I've had a lot of emotions tied to my trauma unrepress themselves. It speaks to my impulsiveness, this almost manic mask I put on in public, my intrusive thoughts, and the pervasive feeling of fundamental isolation from humanity (or at least general society). I feel like I've become something unrecognizable from the person I used to be, and I often feel very inhuman for it.

And this one is here because it's been a comfort song for me since I was around 15. It's lovely, and it also catapulted me into more experimental and undefined genres of music. It still makes me happy to hear, and I know most of the lyrics by heart.

I just got my classes figured out btw, after missing. An entire Week of class. So I'm catching up lmao. Thankfully there isn't too much. This presentation and an assignment for graphic storytelling analyzing Marvel and DC comics are the only two assignments I have. Everything else is just reading some class PowerPoints, documents, and segments of books. I just hope it's not too chaotic when I show up to class lmao. Hopefully I'll leave a good impression from preemptively doing all of the current assignments lmao

[sonsband]

Hi!!

Hanya is such a beautiful name <3 Does it have an specific meaning?

And "collect boy groups" ahha I love that.. I'm still pretty new to the whole kpop universe, and so far only SVT, ATZ and a little bit of SKZ really got me to keep up with them... For some reason I never really got involved with girl groups and I don't know why that is, tho I certainly appreciate them and as a bi person... I just feel attacked from all sides hahahaha Maybe the pressure on them to be 'perfect' is even worse than with the boys so they don't feel as genuine... idk... I know you said you collect bg but if you have gg recommendations I'm all ears

I love that you are also close with your family, my cousins all live far away but I love them soo much

AND YES QUEEN KRAKEN; I'm literally Bobby screaming "Kraken-ya" every time I rewatch the Wonderland stage haha... and no... atz definitely don't sleep I... I don't even try to HOPe they rest anymore (great meme btw heheh)

"to kill a monster with a skateboard in my crop top and boy shorts"... like, coolest sentence I've read in a while hahah I used to sing in a choir from 8 until I was 18 years old, I was a soprano and really good at it, but without practice I've lost some of my mojo... But it doesn't stop me to sing along to every single song I can hahaha My dream would be to sing with Dokyeom... (my ult of ults <3). And I studied graphic design tho it was a very basic course and I never really used professionally, it became more of a hobby and I have some creations on my blog, but now I make more gifs (yes, I'm a gif maker haha) Is faster and a little less creatively demanding so is good to pass the time and relax... recoloring stuff is definitely my favorite part of the process (your gift will be a gifset btw haha I'm still deciding on what exactly)

I would LOVE to have acting classes and learn to dance and play an instrument too (piano would be my choice) and I feel like the group of people I would meet in these environments would be incredible, but right now I just moved on my own to a new country so money is kinda short hahaha But I keep an eye out for that and I learned that is never too late to start anything

I love that you say YunGi are normal height cause I'm 1,55m so... shorter than the shorties hahahahah I guess that's why I tend to stan giants (from my pov), must be compensating hahahaha

Do you mind sharing what you do for work? And where will you be traveling, that's exciting!! There was not much celebration per se on my birthday haha I knew my friends would all be working, so I booked a little solo trip and got to meet a new town nearby a had heard lots about... And people were definitely right, I loved the place and had an Amazing time!! One day before my birthday I managed to secure tickets to see Ateez in Madrid which I still cant believe!!! It will be my first big scale concert ever and I also gave myself a ticket to watch the ballet "Giselle" next week, so yeah, a pretty great birthday week/month hahah I'm an ambivert with great people skills and I love my friends, but I LOVE my time alone as well, you know? 😅

Hoping for your excellent week to be realized 🤞🤞🤞

-Atiny Secret Santa <3

Aww thank youuuuu and no it doesn’t have a meaning it’s just the short, familiar, gender neutral version of my name lmao

I do collect them! I pick them up, inspect them, and put them in my bag. You’ve got good taste, “Hot” grabbed me by the throat and did not let me go for a second, the vocals on that are insane. When DK comes out fucking SWINGING?!?!?! I’m manifesting you getting to sing with him, he’s an S-tier fave, we love boys with big ass voices. I used to adore girl groups, but now they’re all so young that I can’t get into them. I remember being on stage as a teenager and 😬 So I still listen to all my 2nd gen nostalgia songs and follow the women in their 30s and 40s instead – when Kara sang “Step” at MAMA I might have teared up just a little. But none of these new girlies could do Hyolyn’s “Laying Low” so I’m fine. Anyway, if you like older girl groups (both have been performing longer and the members aren’t 17), check out EXID, they’re my favorite girl group – “Fire” wasn’t great, but they are, and I missed Solji so much.

Queen Kraken dominated that stage, I cannot beLIEVE she was robbed like that. smh even let Seonghwa ~kill~ her. We need them to sleep, they’re going loopy, I’m always excited for a comeback but I’m even more excited for a NAP.

It was SUCH a good film pitch. It’s about a bunch of skateboarders terrorized by a monster but they’ve all smoked too much and are too paranoid to figure out what’s going on, which is such a funny concept. I can’t skateboard but that’s fine cause the skateboarders can’t act.

Ooh another singer! Sorry you’re a soprano tho :/ (I’m an alto, I gotta get that in). But YES, it doesn’t matter if we sing seriously or nah, it’s so much fun to just belt along with the radio and music is all about enjoyment.

Oh nice! I admire gif makers, I can’t do it, I much prefer gfx (although I haven’t done one for Tumblr in a while orz), and I’m unsearchable on both of my blogs so I’m just like if I can make something annoying enough for one of my friends to chuckle sensibly that’s my goal. Recoloring is so fun but it’s still work, and then on top of all the other stuff to make a good gif set? You’re clearly so much more patient than me, even if it is meditative for you haha

Dude, it’s been so great taking classes again. I’m not any good at Meisner technique (my teacher yelled at me frequently, all of which was very deserved, and I respond better in the arts to brutal honesty and tough love, so my monologues are peak now) but it was amazing to get back into that space with such interesting people. There were some who were so annoying, but that’s the risk and it’s worth it imo. And you’re so right that it’s never too late to try, the secret is that there are fewer interesting roles for younger actors than older actors, and so you’re always growing into something better, even just good scripts to read in a class.

They’re, what, 185-ish? I’m 180, we’re sooooo normal. My fatal flaw is that I immediately assume the tallest male idol on stage is my dad’s height (196) and then when I find out they’re 180-185-ish I’m like oh so they’re normal! Normal height! It’s not our fault these other boys decided to stop growing! (Actually tho – my cousin was so mad when she moved to America for college and all her classmates weren’t at least 190. She scolded her dad for being 195 and skewing her expectations for American men, since he was the only American in their small town. If we point out that Japanese men also aren’t known for being 190, she says at least she wasn’t lied to.)

I work for the food and beverage department of a museum. I do the boring back-end invoice tracking, but when I’m on-site during the parties it’s wild. When parties are booked at the museum there’s a specific vibe – expensive and extravagant and ridiculous and a little bit tastefully tacky – and so it’s always just fun. The last one had a whole crew of dancers dressed as Lichtenstein paintings, in big dresses, bigger wigs, and stylized halftone makeup. A couple months ago was a sneaker ball, where people wore eveningwear and (WayV voice) thousand dollar shoes

I’m going to the Vatican! My dad’s there like yeah lmao you don’t have to come but his partner (deeply Catholic) is spiritually twisting my ear like “you witnessed a miracle, your father got out of a wheelchair, you are GOING.” I’m not meeting the Pope, but I get to watch my dad meet him, which I’m relieved about since I’m not Christian lmao.

Hey, sometimes you get your own little private celebration, and then a second celebration with friends! That’s totally cool! What town, if you don’t mind me asking? And congratulations~ Have so much fun (at both of them) and I want to hear everythinggggggg I’m not kidding I want a full rundown of your favorite parts.

[beautifulsnake2162020]

Beautiful Anomaly (Part 7): Morpheus x FReader

Gif from tumblr user "the-darklings" post: https://at.tumblr.com/the-darklings/matthew-calling-wanderer-lady-dream-killed-me/psm2s17nu4so

Morpheus x FemReader (present day, its a little hard to explain)

A couple of disclaimers:

1.) This is all based on the Netflix show and I have 0 background on the graphic novel it is based on (so don't expect it to be faithful);

2.) This is a fan work, the only benefit I derive from this is sharing it with the community.

AN: Hello thank you for your patience. This is going to be shorter than the other chapters but don't worry we'll pick up where we left off in Part 8. Btw I have gleaned that some of you may or may not be comfortable with smut or sex scenes (there's none here don't worry and I don't proclaim to be very good at them), and just so you know, Part 8 onwards I'll do my best to save the love scenes for the very end part so it doesn't break the flow of the story but you can leave without having to read it.

For those of you who are new. I highly recommend reading the previous parts first because I don’t know if you will understand everything without first reading those.

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4/ Part 5 / Part 6

Taglist (if you want to be a part of the taglist just comment requesting so) : @winxschester @true-queen-of-mischief @laydreams @memento-mora @daydreamin1220 @kuchokitty @fate-huntress @igotanidea @mikariell95 @seninjakitey

"What do you think will happen once we go to the Threshold?"

"Knowing my sibling, they may probably use any means to turn us against each other."

"But what would be the point?"

"It doesn't matter. They are simply fulfilling their urges. Whatever they do doesn't need to have a point. Only that it has fulfilled my sibling's whims."

You take a breath as the portal to the Threshold opens and taking his hand (only for safety since you haven't went into the Threshold from the Dreaming for as long as you can remember) you two emerge through it. You immediately let go once you've ascertained that you safely made it from the Dreaming into the Threshold.

"Dearest sweet Life. It's been awhile since you've been here. Although why you would choose to be here with Dream is almost beyond my understanding."

"We know what you've been doing my sibling. And I have previously warned you of the possible consequences that should occur."

"Hmm as far as I remember, your threats were only about your affairs, not the affairs of others. So this really shouldn't count."

"Both of you, stop it. It is me who has been the most injured this time Morpheus, let me have my say. And you, Desire will give me answers." You say sternly looking at both of them. You wait for Morpheus to briefly take a step back before turning your attention to Desire. He doesn't leave the area but he does allow you to have the space to lead this confrontation.

"What is your point in your recent machinations against me? Is it because I sent Despair crying at her failure in making me remove my mental barriers? Last I checked we were quite civil during the lifetime I gave the world Melike. Tell me Desire, short of the unreasonable what do you have against me?"

Desire makes a scoff before a sarcastic laugh. And as most of the time you've seen Desire, their smile doesn't reach their eyes.

"We are still civil Life, you may not believe me for I can feel your urge to punch and strangle me right now, but I truly do care for you. As for what you may think are machinations working against you and serving as obstacles as you live your lifetimes, I'm actually doing you a favor."

"Well sorry for being concerned that my life and the world was in danger. You are the only person apart from Despair that could have told Mark Gal Lanes of my abilities as well as the mental bonds I have with all of my children. Do you realize that had I been forced to do what he demands, not only would mine and his life end but also that all life as we currently know it would also end?"

"But it didn't." Desire moves to put themselves closer to you. Not quite personal space invading yet but definitely to force you into being more rigid that you involuntarily cross your arms on front of your chest in your disapproval.

"I knew that your desire to save the world and do your duties was too strong for that to happen. And I also knew you were smart enough that you wouldn't be naïve to simply rescue your child without bringing harm to yourself. As I've guessed you were able to ask help from others, and Mark Gal Lanes didn't really pose a threat to you."

"You're evading my question Desire, what was the point of having him abuse my daughter, and through her suffering not only was I placed in danger since it is no secret that I would help my children but I was also made aware that someone outside the magical community knows of the bonds that I have with my children and the misconception of what my powers can do. Will you please just get to the point? If this is for some sort of revenge over what I have done or if this is for me refusing to simply do what you will beyond reason then just say it already."

Desire laughs, and it makes you uneasy for it is clear that from their non-verbal response that the answer is not one of your guesses.

"The point dearest Life, is that this is all a test for your benefit." You feel yourself raising an eyebrow in confusion.

"And what was it for? That I am still the barometer of balance of the Endless family?"

"Oh you're quite mistaken." They say as they show you a huge smirk.

"It wasn't to test you. It was to test Dream." You feel your eyes widen and his footsteps towards the two of you.

"Have you not considered the threat I gave you last time." Morpheus says, his tone low and almost growling.

"Oh I have considered it, and this is hardly any of your affairs big brother. You volunteered to involve yourself yet you still had the choice not to do so."

"I do not like being played with sibling."

"Morpheus please allow me." You tell him with warning to back off.

"What were you testing him for? And get to the point please." You say in a tone that hopefully left no room for further side comments.

"Life, I know you're a lot smarter than that. But because I do care about you, and while the way that you think gives me immeasurable entertainment, I'll tell you." Desire responds with a grin that makes a part of you uneasy.

"This was to test how Dream here would react and how compatible would he be for you."

"As what?"

"As a romantic partner of course. Isn't that what you've been doing all this time Dream?"

"But why take the initiative to set this up?" You ask before Morpheus could respond.

"I've already said that I do care for you, even though you obviously don't always see it that way. Dream here has not only blamed me for the past failures of his romances, but as you know has a tendency to overreact and even sabotage them completely of his own doing."

"I was doing what I thought was right."

"Which isn't always the case. Just because Nada defied you didn't give you any reason to place her in Hell. Calliope was one of the lucky ones who left you before things got worse between the two of you over what happened to Orpheus." Desire says with unhidden wrath. Even though it wasn't directed to you, you nevertheless felt the sting of his words.

"Don't forget brother that no matter what you do, I know what any being desires, even you and even Life here. And I will be damned if she more than anyone would suffer the consequence of your affections when you yourself are either ignorant of it or simply refuse to see it."

"Do you Desire? Or do you want her for yourself?"

"Oh please Dream, if I wanted her for myself, I would've manipulated her desires a long time ago."

"Since I am your test subject, what was all this to prove?"

"It was to see what you would do, what you would say if something were to happen to Life beyond the ordinary hazards of her duties."

"You were the one who placed me there in the first place!"

"A risk I would rather take than you being heartbroken by this oaf over here who couldn't even directly tell you his own desire for you."

What?

Wait

What?

"Isn't that right Dream? There is no use denying it."

"You've been known to lie."

"All three of us has. And honestly brother, you are the worse among us here in this case. You know of her subconscious thoughts even though you give her the agency to choose what to do with them. You've known for awhile even before you two argued over your silly little contract that caused you two to disconnect. And yet you did nothing to let it be known to her."

You find yourself looking at Morpheus as he glares at Desire.

"Morpheus? Is that true?"

"Oh that's not even the worse part of it. One of the things I despised was that he had the gall to say he does things for the sake of his love for you. Haven't you noticed dear life that most frequently he would only engage in romances only after some arbitrary hidden confirmation that you've somehow stopped loving him and have moved on to one earthly lover to the next? I may know the full extent of your polyamorous heart apart from you, but to him and his fixed ways he would rather be the mournful regretting lover over something that was never his to possess. You can ask him for the details later when the two of you are alone, but that Hob Gabling contract? He did that to understand humanity yes; but most of all it was all made in an effort to woo you with sudden new insights on humanity. And we all know how that turned out."

Maybe it was just because you were still asleep and dreams are hardly the time to have so many information simply dumped on your human brain. But you feel dizzy from what Desire has just revealed to you. You could even sense that right now they aren't even lying.

"Again Desire, what was the point of all of this? Was Despair making a visit to me just this the entire time?"

"The point in everything so far, has been to expose Dream's flaws as a lover. You more than anyone already know of his flaws as a being. But a lot of times you are blind to his flaws as a partner. Recently he has been starting to make attempts to actually woo you and I had to act. I know how both of you are when you two experience heartbreak. The Endless may be unable to recover if you were to experience the ultimate heartbreak from Dream of all beings."

"I would never do that to her."

"You say that now, but your history says otherwise. Life is one of us Dream, she is above a mere mortal that you could condemn to the deepest parts of Hell or a Goddess you could simply leave. She is the reason why we even exist and why mortals think of us. If after this you still decide to pursue her and if she will still have you, I will be closely watching your ways. Because if you two should break each other's hearts, the possible consequences will be felt by all of us more than just a vortex."

"So is this it then? You would rather there is discord in our relationship just as the two of us resent each other? Just so she would become closer to you and -"

"Let me stop you right there Dream." Desire says in a dangerous tone that wouldn't allow room for any argument or interference.

"It is not up to me what happens next. And I'm tired of you blaming everything you do simply on me. I may have played a part - I am the embodiment of desire after all. But what you do with those feelings is on you, brother. Whatever your relationship with Life is, it cannot go on any further. This mutual longing ends after this conversation, Death is not the only one tired of this. And I am putting most of the blame on you."

Morpheus lets out a sarcastic chuckle matching his expression.

"Why?"

"You knew of her feelings. She didn't know about yours. She didn't tell you of her feelings out of insecurity. You didn't tell her that you knew of it or that it was returned out of some sick sense of focusing simply on duties. A pathetic excuse that lead to a torture almost worse than death. Not knowing if what you feel would be returned or would change anything. All this coming from the being who began having feelings for Life the moment he discovered that she had survived the latest mass extinction."

"And what is my fault then?" You quickly ask sensing that Morpheus may do something that he may regret later on.

"Simple, you've survived wars, assassinations, affairs, espionage missions, sabotages, and many kinds of betrayals. And yet despite that courage, you didn't have enough to risk it all and simply tell him your feelings. Had you done so then maybe many things could have been different. I'm not saying you've never loved anyone else. But for some reason Dream is the exception to that."

You forget how you awakened from that conversation. If there was one beneficial thing that came out of it it was that it didn't allow you to forget your dream once you've awakened. You and Morpheus agreed to discuss what you've learnt in the waking world on the weekend when you were free. You both needed sometime to process and discussing it while the revelations made by Desire may only lead to more discord than actual communication.

Thankfully, for that weekend you had your apartment to yourself for whatever might happen. You take a breath before using your powers in your immortal aspect to take his sigil out of what you now call your sub-space after watching many sailor moon episodes and reading a lot of sailor moon manga.

"Morpheus, Dream of the Endless, I stand in my living space as I hold your sigil. If you are free I'm ready to talk of what we've both learned from Desire."

"Wait for me, I'm coming through. Just keep holding my sigil." You hear his voice from the sigil and before you know it you hear his movements from behind you. You turn towards him and on his hand you see a familiar glowing rose (the glow coming from inside the stem and is spread all over after exiting the rose's stamen and pistil) with two branches. One branch had no thorns while the other had plenty of them, both of them at the same height and their leaves positioned diametrically opposed to each other.

"You were going to call me?"

"We did agree to meet on this day, I didn't know who would call who."

You two take a seat once again across each other. Both of you were tense, possibly nervousness of what is to come and how this may force both of you to change your relationship. A part of you wished that it would have remained the way it was before Desire had interfered. But you also knew that Desire was right in saying that it was a test that was needed and that this longing which you've only learned was actually mutual, needed to stop. The consequences for longing too much for two beings such as yourself and Morpheus could be more disasterous if nothing was done about it.

You're the one who begins.

"How long have you known?" He straightens his back and moves himself forward towards you.

"When you first arrived in what would now be called Malaysia, during the early days of humanity."

"Just after you've condemned Nada to Hell?"

"Yes, but back when I came to that knowledge I wasn't in the appropriate mindset to study it further. And when I began to really notice that it never went away, you had already moved on with one or two lovers. Who was I to distrupt your life like that. And so I too moved on."

"But from what I understand there were times when neither of us had lovers or commitments. Why didn't you tell me then?"

"I could ask the same of you. For all this time I had thought your feelings for me was something you thought shameful and wished you didn't have. Whenever you fell in love, you almost always didn't mind sharing your feelings to their recipient. But whenever I felt you speak of your romantic feelings towards me, it was almost always in a hushed conspiratorial way. Almost as if you had a shameful secret that you wish you could be free of. At first I thought it was because I was not mortal, but then neither were some of your lovers. You've fathered children with Goddesses, had three daughters with the Grim reaper, a subordinate of my sister, among others. With all that considered, I had thought that you thought negatively of how you feel for me for you have done nothing acting on those feelings."

You take a deep breath, taking a moment to collect your thoughts before you finally let out your own confession.

"I don't remember when it became something more. Looking back now you were probably right in not doing anything at first."

"Why?"

"Like with many of my romances, it started with infatuation and so I thought nothing of it. I didn't think it was worth telling you since you've probably encountered your fair share of being infatuated upon, I didn't see how this is supposed to be different from all the others. Infatuation could simply fade away once the façade of perfection or unhealthy obsession has been broken."

"So you did nothing hoping that it would fade away?"

"Yes, plenty of times a crush is just a crush nothing more nothing less. I always thought it was similar to what Petrarch or Dante Alighieri had to their muses that they barely knew anything about. The people and beings around me had often thought that it was simply devotion to you or whichever being they thought I was committed to. It's what happened to majority of the people I find myself attracted to. Over time it's simply an acknowledgement of what attracted me to them, then reflecting what I wanted in a relationship. It didn't occur to me that these feelings would only deepen and would simply be somewhere in the background. Not always interfering with how I lived but nevertheless there."

"But what we had was different from Petrarch or Dante. Aside from Death and Lucienne, I always considered the two of us to be close. When you had an issue with me, you have always managed to make me receptive to such criticism without me feeling threatened."

"Which is why I thought it would simply fade away. I am more than aware of some of your flaws, what you seek to do, and the burdens you have. When I realized that it had become deeper than what I had first thought, I still hesitated to tell you because of how focused you were on your duties as the King of Dreams and the prince of stories. I never forgot how you played a big part in saving me before the previous Universe was destroyed."

"That left me more cautious of vortices and how to deal with them. It was my mistake that almost forcibly killed you. And if the Universe couldn't be saved, then the least I could do was to keep your essence in the Dreaming before this Universe had the right balance of allowing you to live and thrive once again."

"Even when I didn't have consciousness back then? When I was back to my prokaryote and simplified eukaryote forms of bacteria?"

"My birth was triggered from your subconscious thoughts... the very first set of subconscious thoughts in existence. The very first of many. Deep down I have always known that even if you would have forms that didn't have consciousness, somehow in some way you would somehow develop a form that regained it." In your periphery you could see that the sun has now reached its peak and it was time to close the windows. Being in a tropical country, one of the biggest environmental threats was getting sunburnt. You were too lazy to put on sunblock and any more heat would make your cotton long sleeves and loose lounge pants more burdensome than lazy relief.

"Anyway, going back to why I didn't do anything about them. I knew better than to further burden you with something that wasn't yours to deal with in the first place. It was my feelings towards you the recipient. Therefore it is only I who should shoulder the burden of having to deal with them. I thought I was doing you a favor since nothing has really changed except perhaps for my perspective. You were closed off because within you, you contain all thoughts and all emotions of all beings. I understood why you did it because I did the same thing with my own memories. And so I did nothing but feel and silently deal with them hoping that doing so wouldn't cause you more pain and burdens than what you were already dealing with."

"Your feelings would not have caused me more pain."

"Can you really say that? It's easy to say that now with the benefit of hindsight. But in the moment I highly doubt you would have felt that."

"And do you have any idea about my own agony? The anxiety of similar sentiments ignored and possibly considered irrelevant?"

"Is that what you've felt? Was what Desire said true that you've started feeling that way towards me ever since the last mass extinction in this earth?" It was his turn to pause. He looks down before meeting your eyes again.

"Yes, it was when I discovered you have managed to survive it despite it almost entirely killing all life on earth that I realized that I wanted you as my partner." Your eyes widen at this revelation.

"Bu-but I didn't have a human form back then." At this he leant closer towards you from across yourself, his form telling you that it was his turn to confess.

"It was your spirit, your mind, your persistence in managing not only to survive but thrive despite almost entirely dying completely...it was my appreciation of those things about you, and even your own paradoxical nature of needing an environment to be well-balanced for you to even exist that made me realize that I want you."

"Is that why Death began inquiring about my consciousness and spirit way back then?"

"Possibly, there were many times when I was tempted to save you again from the mass extinctions that came before. But Death did not allow me to do so. She always told me that I should have more faith in your abilities. Initially I admit I was skeptical because among all the celestial bodies in this galaxy, it was only earth that allowed for the conditions for you to actually live. And with everything needing to be in balance, I saw it as fragile and awaited the days when you would once again regain your consciousness. The moment you did...the moment you were able to dream again, even though you were not always aware of it...it was then that I did everything that I could to ensure that you would thrive. Only to find myself surprised again and again of how you would survive and thrive without my help after every mass extinction. I found myself fearing for you as each one happened. When you emerged from the last one, I could not resist denying my feelings toward you any longer."

"Then why didn't you do anything?"

"My feelings were not reciprocated. In the span of your existence on earth, my discovery that there may be a chance that you may have also felt what I have been feeling towards you was only recent. Like you I have also fallen for others. But unlike you they somehow almost always end in some sort of disaster."

"I've had disasterous relationships too."

"You have the benefit of being released from them because of the human lifespan. I do not have such privilege."

"I thought those were just a consequence of not falling in love with a mortal. Which is why I was surprised to learn that you and Calliope separated and ended your marriage."

"As you can see this also affects my lovers who are immortal." You take this chance to stand up, stretch and head to the kitchen to prepare for lunch. Your stomach begins growling and unlike Morpheus you still needed to eat. You hear him from behind following you.

"Then was Desire right in also saying that there are plenty of things you've been doing to try to woo me or understand me? Such as the infamous Hob Gabling contract?" There was a pause as you begin taking out ingredients from you refrigerator.

"Yes, I will admit now that it was a mistake. You were right in saying that if I wanted to understand humanity...that if I wanted to understand what you see in it, I should first consult you before anyone else."

"That was your attempt to woo me?"

"No, Desire was referring to my recent involvement with you." You feel your heart skip a beat. Suddenly Emira's observations didn't seem so outlandish after all. It turns out you weren't going crazy or reading too much into his actions as simply wanting to restore the friendship you two have lost after your argument over the Hob Gabling contract.

"You were courting my children so that they would put in a good word for you?" You turn to look at his gaze with an eyebrow raised.

"Only initially."

"And you expect me to believe that?"

"Believe what you want to believe, but even you must sense that I do genuinely care for them."

"So let's say I choose not to have you as my partner, can you say that you would still help them if they call on you?" He nods.

"They wouldn't even need to call me just for me to help them." You let out a breath that you didn't know you were holding.

"Well at least that is settled."

"Life." He moves closer to you. Your bodies nearly touching with only enough space that allowed either of you to still move away.

"Please...I apologize for my past mistakes, for not telling you that I have known about your feelings, for all of it. Caring for Emira, Jared, and Ana all came from how I care for you. I still want you to guide me to become better. I still want to be the few whom you can go to and say almost anything without judgment."

"Morpheus." You take a breath and briefly close your eyes. Even now you can't find it in yourself to stay angry at him for long. Desire was right in saying you also played a part to where you both were currently.

"You say almost?"

"I know better than to usurp Death's position as your first confidant." That made you smile just a little bit.

"I'm sorry for not being open about my feelings. But I'm not sorry for what has already happened. What's done is done, and it seems we have forced Desire's ire."

"That is something that I possess long before."

"My point is that perhaps Desire is right in saying that prolonged longing will only result into greater torment. In my defense I didn't know and I wasn't sure if my feelings would have and were ever returned."

"...And now that our feelings are out in the open...how do you want to proceed?"

"Morpheus." You take a bottle of chocolate flavored soymilk from the fridge. It will do for now to sate your hunger. You'll need to wait to continue your lunch cooking after this conversation is finished. You were not going to involve semi-concentration around tools that could possibly slice your fingers. After opening the bottle with the bottle opener, you take a sit at the dining table and gesture for Morpheus to do the same. He once again sits across you.

"I need time to consider what to do. I'm not even sure if I'm even emotionally or mentally available for a romantic relationship right now. And there are plenty of things that needs to be discussed before that even happens." He now bears a fallen expression at your response, but from what his body is telling you, he also understands where you are coming from despite what he wants to happen.

"Please Morpheus, can we go back to what we were before Desire interfered? While I'm reflecting on how to proceed."

"Of course. And let me assure you that no matter what you decide, I will care for you. I know my previous actions suggest otherwise but that is the truth."

And that ended the first part of your conversation. You spend the week contemplating if it was even worth it after all this time.

"All I've ever known was to love from afar that it almost feels like a hidden trap and something is bound to go wrong." You say as you have a video chat with Tala, Lucy, and Nadia on Friday evening. Tala and Nadia had also reported that they should be finished with the counter spell that would remove the coma from Ana's parents by Sunday and hopefully by that evening, the magical community's cover enforcements - similar to the specialists from Vampire Academy - would arrive that evening and would begin to do their work to set up and make paper trails on why her parents were in a coma and whatever story they've decided on to explain Ana's PTSD to the non-magical public.

"Have you already gone through the practical things in your head?" Lucy asks as she begins the first of many steps of her nightly korean skincare routine.

"Yes, many times. And yet a part of me wants to at least try despite it all."

"Then what's stopping you? If despite the practical issues your heart still desires it then go for it."

"Thanks Tala, but it almost seems too good to be true. How will I know that he doesn't one day get tired of me. Or that one day we both feel like it's better to stop and part ways?"

"Then that day simply comes." Nadia responds as she sips her homemade multicolored cocktail from a large transparent mason jar.

"You're insecure about what could or could not happen. You didn't bring this up asking for advice on your possible relationship with Morpheus, but rather of your own insecurities."

"Yeah Dr. Nadia has a point. You've been in several relationships before, but you're scared of what might happen because both of you are essentially immortal and the consequences may spell disaster for not just both of you but for the whole universe." Lucy says before briefly leaving to wash her face from the cold cream makeup remover.

"Which while reasonable also seems to sound like an excuse of even starting a relationship in the first place. Not to force you it's still your life and your decision but it would really suck if after all this initially unrequited longing you would turn down the chance to make it a reality."

"I think what the three of us is saying, you won't know until you actually try. Give him all the preliminaries, set the boundaries for your safety and for the rest of the universe, and other things that need to be discussed, then give it a try. If it fades back into friendship then it'll go back into friendship. If it becomes something more serious then we'll all anticipate your wedding. But you can't know that unless you take the risk." Nadia says as she takes a bigger gulp of her cocktail.

"Besides you've had relationships with deities and other immortal and anthropomorphic figures before. If you're really concerned about him getting tired of you eventually just give him the condition that your relationship slash marriage is only valid for this lifetime. If he wants to continue being your partner then he needs to romance you and marry you again in your next one. That way if either of you has moved on by then, no extra baggage or having to wait around."

"In my off the record semi-professional opinion I recommend you make that as one of your non-negotiables since inherent in your functions is the unpredictability of your environment in each lifetime."

You find yourself smiling and some of the weight lifted from your shoulders.

"Thank you girls."

"Oh and in my very medical opinion." Lucy says as she returns and dabs her face with a small cotton towel.

"From a practicality standpoint you may want to discuss how reproduction could work."

"LUCY!"

"No, actually she has a point."

"Aren't you asexual Nadia?"

"Tala I could still clinically view sexual stuff. As long as I don't have to see or to be involved in it I'm generally okay with it."

"Going back to my medical recommendation. I don't know if him being the King of Dreams would mean if you two could conceive in the dreaming or if he has control of that within his realm. I don't even know if you could conceive only there, here, or whatever. My point is to keep a condom nearby at all times."

"Can't you just recommend me one of your fellow Gynecologists that could give me an IUD?"

"And how are you going to pay for that without your parents knowing? And you can't use your periods as an excuse to them because your periods are now on a regular schedule."

"Damn, good point."

After sleeping on it you decide to call Morpheus the following day. Exactly one week from your last conversation.

"I've decided I want to try." You could see the delight slowly and subtly creep into his face.

"But there are several things that we need to discuss first before you officially begin courting me. You may want to sit down this could take awhile. Would you mind if I ate breakfast while we discuss?"

"Not at all, go on." You serve yourself your first batch of scrambled eggs while you wait for your baguette to be toasted in your mini oven and for your butter to slowly transition from fridge temperature to room temperature and make it easier to place on the baguette. You intentionally called him at this time since you've anticipated that this would be a very long discussion and it may as well take place while you ate breakfast food, your favorite types of food such as waffles, pancakes, scrambled eggs, and the like.

"First no matter what happens I would like for the two of us to still be friends no matter what. I don't know if or how long the romance between us will last but no matter what happens I want to hopefully still call upon you as dear friend."

"You and I have the same wishes then."

"I feel like I need to point this out since sometimes you can get lost in thought or forget things every now and then." You take a moment to pour orange juice from the carafe into your glass.

"Second, if we do have a romantic relationship, however long it lasts it is only valid for this lifetime of mine." He gives you a pointed look.

"Are you serious?"

"I am, I don't know if and when we'll be tired of each other for the rest of existence. And as Desire has pointed out the consequences of a very aggravating breakup between the two of us could have massive consequences for everyone else. This is a safety measure."

"Then what do you want me to do?"

"Morpheus this is simply giving you the option to exit without any baggage, and for it to be as amicable and painless as possible. We can try being partners in this lifetime and if you still want to continue being partners then romance and marry me again in the next. If you don't, then you become a free again to pursuit whomever you want with no strings attached to me." He takes a breath before you see that he concedes.

"If it makes you feel any better, this is the condition I've always told my past immortal lovers before I allowed them to have a relationship with me. It keeps things from getting messy from one lifetime to the next."

"Is that why the Grim Reaper no longer visits you."

"Possibly, it's also possible that our three daughters are still in the after life and they resemble my form back then too much that he can't help but think of them. Which leads me to my next point about my polyamorous nature."

"I am listening."

"I feel like I need to thoroughly discuss this with you since from what I know of your romantic history you've been exclusively monogamous. And yes this includes your affair with Titania, from what I have heard she was the reason you made that deal with Shakespeare."

"It wasn't the only reason."

"My point is that based on what I know of, you're not one for sharing partners with others."

"I've been cheated on by -"

"And that's not what I mean by polyamory. If there's no consent from all parties involved then that's simply cheating." The mini-oven's bell rings signaling that your baguette is now toasted. A well needed pause from correcting his misconceptions on what polyamorous relationships actually are.

"Also before you bring it up, I highly doubt what the romantics practiced was truly polyamory but more of simply sleeping with whomever they wanted. I have a feeling that there was little to no consent from the cheated party of the free love system they had."

"I see."

"I can't change the fact that there may be some people or beings that I will feel attracted to in the waking world. And I also couldn't control whomever you feel attracted to, so I wouldn't. I cannot predict the future but I do want to establish that if anything should become serious and we are still together, then before it goes further we need each other's consent."

"And if I don't give my consent what happens then?"

"Then depending on the situation I either stop pursuing the other party or breakup with you first before pursuing the other party. Same thing if the situation is reversed."

"I see." He pauses.

"Why do we need to discuss this?"

"Aside from the fact that I am polyamorous by nature, it's also somewhat practical. You don't have a consistent presence in the waking world and a legal marriage requires legal personality to engage in. As powerful as you are I'm not sure your powers could suddenly make you possess legal documents suddenly out of nowhere. At least that's what I know of."

"I may think of a few ways." You give him a pointed look before continuing on.

"Speaking of my nature, do you still want me as your guide?"

"Yes, my position hasn't changed on that one."

"Just checking. You seem overwhelmed from all of the things I have demanded on so far."

"It is surprising, yes. But having heard why you needed them...well I may not thoroughly understand them yet but I could catch a glimpse of why you have them as conditions."

Much of the discussion after that was on practical matters that was just a blur on your mind. Things that plenty of times you had to endure but none of the other Endless have to think about since they've typically observed from afar or at the very least from their respective domains.

Then it was his turn to discuss things that he wanted.

"I hope this won't scare you away."

"What is it?"

"I am courting you with the hope that one day you would be my spouse."

"And your consort?"

"Only if you are comfortable with it yes, our domains influence the other's to a higher degree. But that is not what matters to me. I want to marry you, but I will not force you if the idea of marriage is unsuited for your liking."

"Well marriages have changed now from the past centuries. I wouldn't mind being married to you. But the question is can we get there?" He looks at you with tenderness in his face.

"I hope so."

You then agreed to have your first official date next Saturday.

"In dreams or in the waking world?"

"In dreams, for practical reasons." You tell Emira over the phone as you heat up a batch of pre-made garlic bread.

"And you allowed that?"

"I'm giving him his home court advantage of doing his best to woo me. I already told him it should be something intimate but not chokingly so. Just enough to make my introverted self comfortable enough to not care about anything else but him."

"Isn't that what you already do?"

"Not really actually. I barely remember any of my non-intentional dreams."

"Non-intentional?"

"I mean when I didn't deliberately went to the Dreaming to do something else like going into it to confront Desire with Morpheus."

"Oh I see. You two have known each other for awhile so I have a feeling that it's going to be at least decent."

"I'm hoping it doesn't become awkward either."

"If it ever does, there's always the next one to improve on. At least you're both on the same page about wanting to have a long term. That was always the struggle on my first dates and they would always say 'Oh let's just keep it casual and see where this takes us.'"

"Tell me Emira, do you think I was too demanding of him discussing my conditions before actually starting?"

"Not really. I wish I had the benefit of doing that first with my boyfriend but I think you were just establishing your boundaries. You know him better than I, but no considering what you've told me and how dramatic he can sometimes be, you did good mom."

"Thank you dear. Any advice you'd like to give me before I go into the dreaming tonight?"

"I don't know. I've never dated anyone who was my friend first before the first date."

"Weren't you classmates with your current boyfriend first?"

"Yeah but he was just that, a classmate. An acquaintance at most before he asked me out. So maybe um when in doubt just treat it as hanging out with a friend? Since the two of you want to be friends no matter what. Sorry that's the best I could do since all my other advice is about dating in the waking world and not in the dreaming."

"Hahaha don't worry Em, still that's good to keep in mind."

"Oh by the way mom, what do you think of the King Raven plushie for Ana?" She sends through the messenger chat a screenshot of the squishables King Raven plush. Since Ana has officially returned to her still coma recovering parents who are still being taken cared of by the cover enforcement, she's been chatting with everyone of you. Or rather she's talking with everyone she didn't have a mental bond with. And since she can't rely on messenger alone, you all decide to send her a care package containing various items that acts as your "sigils" in case she has no internet and she needs someone to talk to. These things have to also be regular items so it cannot compromise the magical community.

"Is there a smaller version of that? Something cheaper? As cute as it is I don't want you spending too much money."

"Yup, there's a mini version that's about 10 inches."

"That's the smaller one?"

"It's the cheaper one."

"Well okay, if you're sure you want that as a sigil item for your sister."

"I'm sure, is the Plague nurse your sigil item?"

"No, I picked that simply because it's cute. My sigil item is this." You take a moment to picture the jade pendant hanging around your neck.

"A Hello Kitty shaped jade pendant?"

"She loves Hello Kitty and this just so happened to be available when I was online window shopping."

"Is that even real jade?"

"Probably not, I picked it because of the Hello Kitty form and she could wear it always. That way she'll somehow have some form of my protection."

"Okay, good point."

You check the time and it was about 1:47 pm.

"Do you think it's too late to change plans a bit?"

"Please tell me you're not planning on cancelling your date. How can you backout of a dream?"

"No don't worry I'm not planning on backing out. I just feel like things might be a little less awkward if maybe it started with a dinner in the waking world."

"OOH You're planning on taking him out?"

"Not really. Just maybe a dinner here before we move into the bedroom-Not like that."

"Not like what?" You could hear the grin in her voice.

"Get your mind out of the gutter, it's for going into the dreaming not for sex."

"I mean, let's not rule it out."

"Emira."

"Kidding, just kidding. Would you like me to come over and help?"

"That depends are you finished with your case digests?"

"...Okay tell me how it went. Bye mom."

And with that you make your preparations.

Author's Note: I've decided to end it here because it felt right and Part 8 officially begins the start of their courtship.

1.) This is my Hello Kitty pendant that is referenced (the pendant is actually very small so I just tend to hide it under my clothes):

Zoomed out

Zoomed in 1

Zoomed in 2

2.) This is the (mini) Plague Nurse plushie - and yes I only got her because she's cute.

3.) This is Mini King Raven squishable plushie - I don't actually have this one (I'm saving to get the Plague doctor and the grim reaper) but this plushie reminds me so much of Matthew, you'll see why Emira chose this to be her "sigil" (or for the Supergiant Hades fans out there, the "Keepsake"/"Companion") in the next parts.

4.) Just to clarify, all of Life's children with immortal partners are demigods or demigodlike (the point is they can still die) since Life is the mortal half and is what makes them a part of life and death. Currently they are all in their respective afterlives.

5.) I asked my friend whose a fan of the Sandman graphic novels about why Desire and Dream are so hostile and she explained it to me and also gave me some insight into why Desire is the way they are. Since Part 1 already establishes that while Life doesn't entirely trust Desire, she's at the very least civil with them and a little bit more empathetic to them than Dream is. Since Desire is shown in canon to be an antagonist already I've decided to have Desire genuinely care about Life and to have them be the one to force them to confront their mutual longing for each other.

6.) I've also looked into a little bit of Dream's romantic history based from general tumblr posts and how at least according to graphic novel Marvin, Dream has a tendency to want to be the brooding figure and has a way of self-sabotaging relationships. With this in mind, I hope its understandable why Desire did what they had to do. It was one thing for it to happen to mortal women, goddesses and other worldly beings to suffer the consequences of Dream's overreactions, but it's another if Dream will subject Life to the only way he knows how to respond to anything he doesn't like about being in a relationship.

Once again thank you so much for reading :)

[the-insomniac-emporium]

Wounded Love (Lady Dimitrescu/F!Reader)

Fandom: Resident Evil: Village Rating: M for mature. Blood, more blood, heavy language, seriously lots of blood. Literally the bloodiest/most detailed thing I've written. Genre: Super angst with some fluff to ease the pain. We're talking putting honey in your cup of poison to make it taste better. The ending is split, with both a happy and a sad ending. Warnings: Minor surgery (technically?) while the patient is fully awake (that's the reader, btws), blood loss, graphic depiction of a wound and how said wound is taken care of. Possible trigger for self-harm, as the reader is performing part of the surgery themselves. Also brief mention of cannibalism in the bad ending. This may very well be a Dead Dove: Do Not Eat sort of thing. Notes: While I have more medical knowledge than the average person, due to my Girl Scouts training + having a mother as a nurse, I am in no way shape or form a medical professional, and do not suggest that the methods of treatment used in this fic be taken seriously. If you find yourself seriously injured, do not attempt to replicate anything you read here. Only a portion of this is based on a real-ass incident I went through, the rest is based on a dream, and what I experienced was not what you want to do in an emergency.

{Wounded Love}

This was a mistake. Blood stains your leg, your fingers, and bruises start to form all over your exhausted body. And for what? Why had you, a tiny, fragile human, dared to pass through this damned, lycan-infested forest? Because a woman who didn’t even love you asked you to. Now you were going to die, body certain to get left out in the cold or reduced to a pile of gnawed bones. If you had more strength remaining, you might have slammed your hand into the ground in frustration, or screamed until your lungs burned from something other than frost.

But that wouldn’t get you anywhere. Wouldn’t help you get back to the castle, wouldn’t ease the racing of your heart. So you settle for the only thing that might do any good: One quick motion pulls the scarf from your neck, sending a chill down your spine that you promptly ignore. Even with shaky hands and numb fingers, your experience is enough to let you wrap the cloth around your leg, tying the ends in a knot to secure it. The pressure hurts, just not enough for you to prefer bleeding out. A test step reveals that walking is mildly more difficult now.

“I’m going to haunt her,” you muse, under your breath, tears starting to freeze at the corner of your eyes. Still, you are as quietly determined as ever, and so once more you limp down the path. Every time you put weight on your injured leg it protests harder. If not for the snow and ice covering the ground, you might have quickly searched for a walking stick. “What could be so important about this damn package? Couldn’t Doug or whatever-his-fucking-name-is deliver it? Man can practically teleport, and here I am, watching as blood loss and hypothermia race to see who can kill me first.”

Gods were you angry. Why had this happened so soon after you had settled in? Finally you had been comfortable in Castle Dimitrescu, no longer as frightened of the residents, even finding them… charming, in a way. Then the Lady of house called to you for what she claimed to be a simple errand. You had believed her, even when she explained that you would have to leave the relative safety of her home. What a fool you had been.

“What a fool she must be,” you murmur, “to think me safe here. To think I could outlast wolfmen prowling the village outskirts.” Would she even care if she saw you now? Would she be surprised, disappointed? Would she do something to change your fate? There was no reason for her to do so. It didn’t matter how much you had helped her, how much she claimed to appreciate what you did (heavy lifting, repair of clothing, massages). You were as replaceable as any other Maiden there was. And that, that was what made you have a double-take. It came to you in that moment, a thought so painful that you could not deny it was the truth. “She never thought I would survive.”

Bitterness coats your tongue, like blood in your throat, and your brain demands that you destroy your cargo, the very thing that got you sent here in the first place. You almost do it. Feet stopping, arms shrugging the carrying straps off, bloody hands taking hold of it. Tears fall, just two, and hit the package. At that moment your plan changed. This new idea would be far, far more satisfying… as long as you succeeded.

------------------------

Spite was one hell of a drug. Enough of it and you could march your warm corpse right back to the castle, fist banging on the front door with everything you had. The path had been shorter than you thought, thankfully, but it had still taken so much out of you. Now you were leaning against the door, sliding down it, unable to support your own weight. Nothing inside the castle stirred. Were they ignoring you? Was Alcina really going to let you die inches from your “home”? Fuck that, you thought.

“Alcina!” You scream, loud as you can, startling the birds in the distant trees. The word echoes around you and rattles inside your ribs. It’s not enough. “Damn it, I am seconds away from dying, get out here now so I can look you in your fucking eyes!” Something tears a little in your throat, turning the last of your words into a hellish screech, leaving you to gasp and croak in the snow. You go to wipe your tear-filled eyes with your hands, only to remember just how much blood they’re covered in.

Sobs overtake you in just a few moments. You’re blinded by tears, deafened by sorrows, and numb from all the cold. In the aching seconds before you black out, you can only barely make out the silhouette of someone rushing to your side…

------------------------

The first thing you feel when you wake up is mind searing pain. You try to jolt upwards, only to find a pair of strong, gloved hands holding you down. Someone shouts something, but you can’t make it out, and you feel another hand gently squeeze one of your own. Pained gasps escape your throat one after the other, but whatever is hurting you doesn’t stop. It takes a full minute for you to adjust enough to make sense of where you are. At last, you understand what’s being said.

“-it’s okay, shhh, please, we’re trying to help,” says none other than Lady Dimitrescu herself. She’s the one holding your hand, doing her best not to hurt you with her grip, trying desperately to calm you down. One the other side of you, Cassandra is positioned to hold you down. There’s a tight-lipped scowl on her face, and her brow is furrowed, but she’s not looking at your face, but rather eying somewhere in the opposite direction. Following her gaze, you find her older sister is sitting near your injured leg, and is undeniably the source of some of your pain. In one hand she holds a bottle of alcohol (notably not the wine her family produces), the other holding a wet cloth to your wound. No wonder it stings so much.

“Shit, shit, stop,” you growl, barely getting the words out. But all anyone does is look at you. Alcina’s mouth opens to speak, only for you to cut her off. “I’ve got medical training, for the love of Mother Miranda let me help! How long have I been unconscious?” This time Bela stops, glancing at her mother for direction. The grip on your torso grows looser, with Cassandra evidently heeding your words, and you take the chance to sit up, careful not to move your leg. At this point you realize that there’s a needle of sorts in your arm, attached to a tube, which trails up into a blood bag. It’s clearly been improvised with equipment from the “wine-making” part of the castle.

“Fifteen minutes at most,” a new voice chimes, from somewhere behind you. “I got that cloth you wanted, mother, but something tells me I’m not done fetching things.” Ah, Daniela Dimitrescu. Was the whole family helping you?... Why? As much as you wanted answers, there wasn’t (currently) time for questions. Not when one glance at your leg tells you that some of your flesh is rapidly decomposing. The wound was made only an hour ago, and already it was getting deadlier than you could even process.

“I need a sharp, clean knife, a needle with thread, a glass of water, and someone needs to put a metal tool, sterilized, on the stove, right now,” you said, finding it easier to talk now that no one was cleansing your wound. Without hesitation Daniela dispersed into a cloud of insects, heading towards the kitchen, while Cassandra stood up and moved towards the stairs.

“Guess I’ll get the needle,” she said, sounding rather unenthusiastic.

“What are you planning?” Alcina asks, more concerned than you had ever heard her before. Attempting to reassure her, you manage a small smile before explaining.

“Got scratched and slobbered on by a lycan. Whatever they have, it’s infectious. If I want to save my leg, or at least have a chance at surviving, I have to take measures to reduce the likelihood of an infection,” you say. Now Alcina is slowly stroking her thumb across your hand, eyes narrowed with concern. There’s a look on her face that you can’t quite parse, something she’s not saying. For now you ignore it and continue going over your plan. “The best thing would be to amputate. The tourniquet might have helped prevent the saliva from getting further into my body- and I do mean might- but I can’t keep it on forever. Problem is… I don’t want to lose it. God, I’m terrified of that, and with what we have in the castle I… I’d be more likely to die of shock than not. So, well, forget that idea.

“I’m just going to remove the wound. By making a bigger wound. It’s crazy, I know, but this will kill me if we do nothing. It will probably kill me if we do. The technical term is some shit like ‘de-bride-ing’?... No, debridement, I think. Except normally the poor fucker getting cut open is asleep for the procedure.” By the time you’re done, Lady Dimitrescu is looking at you with horror. Yeah, you had a feeling she wouldn’t appreciate the idea. “Look, if this is too much… if it’s not worth saving me, if you’d rather give me a quick death, I understand. If I were-”

“Don’t be foolish, dear. You will not die, not as long as something can be done about it,” Alcina replies, quickly, eager to stop hearing you talk about dying. It’s… strange to hear her sound so confident about saving you, even stranger to realize what she called you. As if reading your thoughts, she shifts in her seat, avoiding your gaze for a moment. Shyness didn’t suit her, and you imagined it was more about her finding the right words. When she speaks, she’s looking right at you again. “I have hesitated to tell you the truth, and now I find the world playing a cruel trick on me, trying to take that which I adore. But I don’t want to aggravate your stress right now. Please, think nothing of what I have said.”

Before you could reply, footsteps reached your ears, and soon enough Daniela returns. In one hand she holds a large pitcher of water. In the other? Several knives, of various sizes, one of which you’re pretty sure you’ve seen Cassandra playing with before. As soon as you see her your face lights up, glad to be able to start the procedure.

“Oh thank fuck- or, I mean, thank you, Lady Daniela,” you stutter, reaching out as she offers you the items. Thankfully Bela had already made room on the table at your side, where she had set the bottle of alcohol down. For a moment you had forgotten that she was there. Had she already known about her mother’s feelings? Based on her lack of reaction, you could only assume that she was well aware. “I’m gonna scream, B-T-dubs. Just, uh, cover your ears?” You offer, already holding your chosen knife (big enough to be effective, small enough to offer precision).

“So… you’re going to do this yourself? Didn’t think you had it in you, red. Try not to cut anything important. Wouldn’t want to have to clean that mess up,” Daniela teases. As soon as she’s finished she has to shift into a swarm, as Bela flat out throws a knife at her. For a moment you freeze, watching as Alcina rises to her full height, staring her eldest daughter down. Behind her, Daniela reforms, clearly using her mother as a shield. “I was just trying to relieve the tension, jeez. It’s like you think she’s already dead.”

“Don’t speak another word!” Alcina snaps, sending a frightening stare towards Daniela. You cough, awkwardly, not knowing what to do. Meanwhile Bela is pinching the bridge of her nose between two fingers, clearly tired of dealing with her sister’s sense of humor. “No one will speak a word until this is finished, unless my dear needs something, understood?” Both the girls nod at that, neither feeling a need to risk any further ire.

“I’m just going to start working now,” you awkwardly chime, taking a deep breath before leaning in towards your injured leg. On closer inspection you can see a strange, dark residue in the wound. They’re specks, scattered along the length of it, and they seem more common the closer you look to the gash’s center. Gross, you think. Half curious, half checking for legitimate reasons, you bring your other hand to the cut and gently spread both sides apart. It hurts like hell, and you have to bite down on your lip to stop yourself from screaming. But sure enough, the residue is practically solid at the deepest point of the wound. “Those lycans really should be on leashes.”

Out of the corner of your eye you can see Daniela exchange looks with Bela, but neither of them disobey their mother (yet). Shaking the thought away, you finally get to the brunt of the task at hand. Your hand moves slowly, reluctant to inflict such damage against its own body. As soon as the tip of the knife touches your skin, you start to doubt your ability to do this. It takes looking at Alcina, seeing the way she watches you with equal parts concern and tenderness, to remind you why you’re doing this. Death just wasn’t something you could accept right now; not after what she had said, what she had implied.

The knife is fantastically sharp. Hardly any pressure is needed before your flesh gives away, cells letting go of their neighbors like it was a casual affair. You start at the left side of your injury, digging down a little, trying to only go as deep as you needed to. Tears formed in your eyes but you quickly blinked them away. As the first of many screams leaves your mouth, you turn and twist the knife, cutting to the right, then up. Like scooping the seeds out of a pumpkin. Fresh blood springs from the wound, starting to fill up the crevice. Quickly you discard the skin you removed by tossing it into the same bowl that Bela had put a bloody towel in earlier.

“Yes,” you shudder through gritted teeth, “this hurts so fucking bad. No, I don’t need someone to take over yet.” At this point neither of the present sisters are looking at you, seeming oddly uncomfortable at the sight of you cut up like this. Hadn’t they done worse to your fellow Maidens?... Whatever, the thought couldn’t last long when you still had work to do.

Next you take a fresh, damp cloth and dab at your injury, ignoring how it throbbed beneath your touch. Then you resumed cutting, forced to press the knife deeper in order to remove the spreading residue. If you had been a scientist, this would have been utterly fascinating to observe. Whatever had been in the lycan’s saliva was slowly eating at your flesh, but not outright dissolving it. No, it simply left the skin where it was, but killed and rapidly broke it down. Yes, it would have been fascinating, if not for the fact that there was a chance you wouldn’t be able to outpace the bacteria.

With this in mind you force yourself to hold in your next scream, hoping to make it easier for you to focus. The knife continued to cut, going lower, setting nerves alight as it did. Your vision starts to blur, and for a few seconds you think you’re going to black out. Someone says something you don’t hear, and then suddenly there’s a hand on top of your own. When your vision clears you see Bela is responsible, her grip keeping you from dropping the knife. She doesn’t let go until you give her a clear nod. Even then, she seems reluctant to let you continue.

Around this time is when Cassandra returns. Her footsteps catch your attention (it’s your understanding that carrying objects is much harder in swarm mode), and you spare her a quick glance before getting back to work. A few moments later she’s placing a set of needles and a long spool of thread next to you. Ironically, they’re the same tools that you’ve used to repair and adjust Alcina’s dresses over the past year. Hopefully they work just as well on flesh, you think. Your next thoughts are canceled out by unbelievable pain. More cries leave your lips, and your hand starts shaking. Panic is settling in fast, your movements getting sharper, leading you to make a brash decision: Time to care less about precision and more about speed.

“Distract me, please,” you gasp between grunts. No one responds at first, and you know they need clarification. Speaking is getting harder by the second, but you do your best. “Brain can’t process many stimulants, same time. Just- fuck- trace skin around wound, touch hair, anything.” Somewhere between your semi-broken sentences and screams, Alcina gets the message. She’s moving closer, now, behind you, one arm wrapping around your waist, the other rubbing gentle circles on your undamaged leg. Across from you Daniela is too busy pacing to help, though you can hardly blame her.

“Should I get the metal thing from the stove?” Cassandra asks, silently hoping that Dani hadn’t assumed someone else was going to handle that part. You’re still in too much pain to talk, so you half nod half grunt in response. Not bothering to say anything, the middle child takes off, swarm moving at what might be a new speed record.

As much as your hands are shaking, you still manage to cut away another strip of flesh, tossing it aside with even less care than before. This time Bela wipes the wound for you, practically reading your mind. The moment her hands are completely out of the way you start cutting again, crying out, throat shredded to pieces from all your screaming. Alcina sounds like she might be close to sobbing, but she doesn’t stop her movements, doing her best to distract you just like you had asked. Even Bela helps, now, tracing spots around your injury whenever she knows she won’t be in your way. The effect is minor, in the end, hardly making a dent in how much pain you’re processing.

If you survive this, though, you’re hugging every daughter as tight as you can and showering them with affection… but only after you finish doing the same for their mother.

“You are so brave,” Alcina murmurs next to your ear. It’s even clearer now how close she is to crying, her voice seconds away from cracking. Hearing her like this almost hurts as bad as the initial lycan attack did. “You are so strong. No other mortal could ever be your match. Do you understand, my dear? You are blessed, divine, and I love you so much.”

In any other setting, her words would leave you melting in her arms, radiating affection so strongly that you might as well have been radioactive. Instead, you are unable to respond, or even look her way. All you can do is press the knife to your skin again, showing your own feelings by destroying yourself for her.

The blade is starting to find more resistance, and you’re having to pause more often, spots appearing in your vision. Going faster only makes things worse, your hand threatening to slip. You’re determined to finish this, no matter what, but your need to control the situation is gradually making things worse. Alcina notices this before you do, and acts before you have a chance to protest.

“Bela, the knife,” she says, then tightens her grip on your waist. Your confusion shifts to panic as your arm is carefully, but forcefully, pulled away from your wound. “Can you finish the job?” It takes you a few moments to realize that Alcina isn’t talking to you. No, she’s speaking to her eldest daughter, who doesn’t hesitate to take the knife away from you. It’s so easy for her, between her strength and your weakness. “Don’t struggle. Let us finish this.”

Protests rise from your throat and die in your mouth. Pain flares harder now that Bela isn’t distracting you. Once more your vision goes dark, but this time there’s no pause, no hesitation. You are suffering, horribly, and the Dimitrescu family refuses to make you hurt longer than necessary. It’ll be over soon, you think, not knowing whether you refer to your pain or your life itself.

Something wet drops onto the back of your neck, then darkness overtakes you…

------------------------

“Damn those lycans, I should string Heisenberg up myself! They’re his responsibility, after all,” Lady Dimitrescu snarls, trying to ignore the tears in her eyes. Now that you’re unconscious, unable to hear what ails her, she feels free to voice her thoughts. “The damn things should never have come close to the path to the village.”

“What if she strayed from the path? Wouldn’t that explain it?” Bela suggests, even as her hands work to remove what seems to be the last piece of dead/infected flesh from your leg. She hates how the words feel in her mouth, hates suggesting that you of all people might have betrayed her mother’s trust. But it makes sense. After all, this whole mess, with you leaving the castle to retrieve a mysterious package, was all a test to see if you would try to run. It hadn’t been her idea, and Bela admitted to herself that she thought it was unnecessary.

“On the way back? Why would she bother getting the package if she intended to run?” Lady Dimitrescu asks, right as Cassandra returns. The middle child is practically juggling the metal spatula she’s carrying, irritated (not harmed) by the heat it produced. One of her brows perks up when she hears the conversation, but she keeps any thoughts she has to herself.

“Just a thought, mother, I didn’t quite believe it myself,” Bela chimes, after a pause. With that said she holds up her hand with pride, clutching between her fingers the last of the decaying flesh. The way the others react, one might have thought that a miracle had been performed. Daniela clapped her hands together, giggling a little, and finally stopped her pacing. “Don’t celebrate too much, now,” Bela reminded her, taking the spatula from Cassandra as she did. “There’s still plenty to do. It’s a good thing she’s not awake for this part.”

A good thing, indeed. She uses her fingers to spread the remaining skin a little, giving a quick examination, then deciding that she had successfully removed all remaining residue. Keeping her fingers where they were, she pressed the side of the spatula to your skin, putting the most pressure at the center of the wound. Three seconds passed, then she lifted her hand. A pause. She pressed it back into place, keeping a close eye on the affected area. This repeated several times, the gaps being necessary to prevent unintentional damage. Once the wound seemed properly closed she set the spatula aside.

“Is that it?... Did we save her?” Daniela asks, opting to finally sit down in a nearby chair. Something about her word choice makes both of her sisters scoff.

“I could sew it closed, as a precaution, but there’s no way I’d do it the way she had intended. It might be best to just give her time to rest, and see what she thinks when she gets back up,” Bela answers. For a moment her words hang in the air, but eventually Alcina gives a little nod and a hum.

“Very well. I shall carry her to my quarters, where she won’t be disturbed. Please, let one of the Maidens know to bring some food up this evening,” Alcina says, gently taking you into her arms as she does…

------------------------

BAD ENDING: It’s been six hours, with no sign of you waking up. Your other wounds had been examined, cleaned, and bandaged. Food had been carefully prepared and brought up to you, though it now remained on the bedside table, untouched. Alcina has gone to call Mother Miranda, intending to speak to her about the growing unrest of the lycans, as Heisenberg hadn’t answered his phone. For the first time since you returned you are alone. It is now, of all times, that you awaken. A gasp sends you into a coughing spree, forcing you into a sitting position. The space around you feels like it's moving, and your vision blurs. Blood spills from your mouth as you finally regain the ability to breathe.

Seconds later your vision clears, but what you see is enough to make you wish you couldn’t. The blood that spilled onto the sheets is a dark red… with even darker spots scattered throughout it. All at once you know what happened: Residue had hidden from you, or gone deeper than your wound, infecting you before you ever stood a chance. Tears threaten to spill from your eyes, but something deeper starts calling to you. Something older. Darker. It drags you to your feet, ignores the pain of your wounds, and sends you out the bedroom door.

Your mind is racing, thoughts never quite clear enough for you to understand. It doesn’t feel like you’re in control of your own movements. Was something else in charge, or were you operating on an infection powered autopilot? Answers weren’t coming, just bloodshed.

“You’re not supposed to be out of bed yet!” A voice calls out to you, making you turn to investigate. On the other end of the hallway is a maiden, one you instantly recognize. You’ve worked with her before, plenty of times, tag-teaming more tasks than you could count. She was like a sister to you. When she sees the blood staining your clothes, she gasps, then moves to support you. “Please, Lady Dimitrescu will be so upset if you-” her words melt into a blood curdling scream. For a moment you don’t understand.

And then you swallow, a chunk of hot meat slipping down your throat, and the scream dies down.

“What?...” You whisper, finally tasting the blood in your mouth, watching as your friend’s body falls to the floor. There’s a chunk of flesh missing from her neck, and the dots connect themselves in your head. You did that. Every part of you wants to scream, wants to cry out and beg someone to come kill you. Instead you fall to your knees, hard, uncaring. Your hands move themselves, grasping at the still warm corpse. Something has made you stronger, or at the very least removed the mental limits that kept you from destroying yourself. Flesh gives under your touch, tearing like paper, and you start crying as it reaches your mouth.

Footsteps approach, thundering fast, and you want to warn whoever it is. When you turn to look, you feel your hands let go of your meal. Your gaze meets that of a stunned Cassandra Dimitrescu, then drifts to the sickle in her hand.

“Kill me,” you growl, voice distorted, practically echoing. “Kill me now!” Not needing to be told a third time, Cassandra moves lightning quick, swarm-jumping forward before manifesting behind you, sickle dragging across your throat in one smooth motion. But it’s not enough. She realizes this, though, and slams her foot into your back, sending you tumbling forward. It’s enough to prevent you from countering, which gives her time to advance again, this time pulling a knife from her boot and driving it into the center of your back. When you scream, it’s not with your own voice, but that of a monster.

“Fucking fuck, what the fuck, red?” Daniella asks as she rounds the corner, eyes immediately landing on your bloodsoaked mouth. She’s quick to take in the scene, drawing a conclusion easily, even if it breaks her heart a little. Your vision fades as she approaches, and you know that it’s finally over. If only you had expired a few seconds earlier… because the last thing you hear is the startled cry of your would-be lover.

“No! No, darling, what happened-” Alcina finishes her sentence, but you do not hear it. You do not hear anything, anymore. You do not know it… but there will be hell to pay for your death.

------------------------

GOOD ENDING: When you awake, you find yourself in the softest sheets you’ve ever touched, a warm and familiar presence next to you. The first thing you see is Alcina’s sleeping face next to your own. She’s on her side, one arm around your waist, the covers pulled up to her hip. Warmth fills your chest as you take in the sight. For a few moments you just… appreciate this. Never before had you imagined that you would get to wake up next to the woman you loved so much. A sigh, one of bliss, leaves your lips. Slowly you move forward, gently placing a kiss to Alcina’s cheek. Seconds later her eyelids flutter open, and she tiredly takes you in.

“You’re… awake,” she murmurs, hardly awake herself. But her fatigue doesn’t last long. As soon as she’s fully processed the situation her eyes go wide. Then she’s pulling you closer, careful not to hurt you, and peppering little kisses over your face. “I’ve been so worried, dear. You scared us so much.” The hurt in her voice leaves you restless, making you curl up against her, desperate to soothe her worries. Moving hurts a little, but not enough to dissuade you from your goal.

“I’m sorry, love,” you say, tears pricking your eyes. “I’m okay, I’m alive, the plan worked out. You don’t have to fret for me anymore. I won’t leave you, I promise.” Slowly but surely, Alcina calms, exchanging kisses for softly running her fingers through your hair. There’s such love in her eyes that you can hardly believe you aren’t dreaming. “You’re amazing, Alcina. I could stay like this all day.”

“Maybe we should,” she offers, chuckling a little. Once again you give her a quick kiss, unable to resist the urge. “I should have never asked you to leave. I should have just trusted you.” The words give you pause, and you tilt your head in confusion. Realizing that you still didn’t know the full story, Alcina frowns. “The package is worthless, just a bundle of straw and a few rocks for weight. It was never what I cared about.”

Tension builds in your chest, and for a few seconds you have no idea how to react. It takes a minute for you to think, to connect the dots, but once you do it’s a tad bit easier to breathe. A scowl twists your lips as you think of what to say.

“If I had known that Heisenberg was forgoing his duties, I never would have sent you outside,” Alcina adds, the silence taking its toll on her.

“You shouldn’t have sent me either way,” you respond, bitterly, thinking of all that you had seen and heard on your journey. “I would have done anything to prove to you how I feel. There are other ways to show devotion- far less dangerous ways, at that.”

“I know, dear. You have every right to be angry… and watching you suffer has taught me all that I need to know,” Alcina says, still playing with your hair, trying to ease the tension. As upset as you about this recent revelation… it’s not enough to change how you feel about her, and you want her to understand that, fully and completely.

So you lean into her touch, let your eyes drift close for a moment, then softly place one of your arms around her as best as you can.

“We’ll need to talk about this more… just not right now. Right now, I need you, Alcina. I need to hold you, and be held by you, and just know that you’re here. That I’m here. That neither of us are going anywhere,” you say, resting your forehead against hers. “I need to feel safe, and your arms are the safest place I can imagine. Stay here with me?”

“It will be the easiest thing I have ever done.”

[beclynn-herondale]

Can I ask for some help?

I saw the TMI tv show and I really really NEED to get my love for Clary and Jace back and remember the real Clace. Can you please remind me some quotes or something about them? Something about how they never fell out of love? About how they never bossed people around? How they cared about others? How close Jace and Alec were as parabatai ? How love and respect and trust holds the TMI gang close and not only sense of duty? How they are rebellious teenagers and not an impulsive and stupid gang of young adults?

My brain is lost-

Also, feel free to ignore and delete, I just felt lost and since you are the CEO of the Support Clace gang on Tumblr, I thought I should send you an ask. I love your blog btw

Hello, lovely peach blossom

Here's some of my fav couple quotes from them. They are eloquent sword babes, honestly.

"Let her go," Jace said, his voice soft. He hadn't meant to speak so softly or gently. The tone took him back years, years and years to a small boy comforting a bird, speaking softly to it, taming it, petting its wings. To a time and a moment gentleness had not been foreign, and love had not been destruction. To his most treasured memory of home. There was no reason to look at this girl, with her wild red hair and her bright eyes and think of home. But he did.

Clary. Of course that was her name. Clary, clearity, clary sage that folklore said gave mundane the sight. A name that sounded like lightness, brightness and seeing. Exactly the right me for a girl who seemed able to see anything. To be able to see through anything. To be able to see through him. She gave a glance behind her, not at the three of them, but just at Jace. He stood very still as her gaze tracked over him — puzzled, dazzled, amazed. As if, like Hamlet, she looked on something that was wondrous strange to the human eyes. And in her green eyes he thought he saw a flicker of regret as she turned and walked away from them.

"There is no pretending," Jace said with absolute clearity. "I love you, and I will love until I die, and if there's a life after that, I'll love you then." - Jace

"And I would do it again. I love you, Jace Wayland-Herondale-Lightwood-whatever. I don't care. I love you and I will always love you, and pretending it could be any other way is just a waste of time." - Clary

"Every time I think I'm missing a piece of myself, you give it back to me." - Jace

"You don't have to. I have enough faith in you," she said, "for the both of us." - Clary

"I didn't know," he said. "I didn't know you needed me." Her voice shook. "I always need you." - CoFA

"As long as I can dream, I willl dream of you." - Jace

"And now I'm looking at you," he said, "and you're asking me if I still want you, as if I could stop loving you. As if I would want to give up the thing that makes me stronger than anything else ever has. I never dared give much of myself to anyone before—bits and pieces to the Lightwoods, to Isabelle and Alec, but it took years to do it—but Clary, since the first time I saw you, I have belonged to you complete. I still do. If you want me." - Jace

"In some ways, we've been through something no one else can ever understand but the two of us," he said. "And it made me realize. We are always absolutely better together." - Jace

"My heart is your heart," he said . "My hands are your hands."

"But it doesn't change what we are to each other. It's like there's always been a piece of my soul missing, and it's inside you, Clary. I know I told you once that whether god exists or not, we're on our own. But when I'm with you, I'm not." - Jace

"There are a hundred trillion cells in the human body, and every single of the cells in my body loves you. We shed cells, and grow new ones, and my new cells love you more than the old ones, which is why I love you more than I did the day before. It's science. And when I die and they burn my body and I become ashes that mix with the air, and part of the ground and trees and stars, everyone who breathes that air or sees the flowers that grow out of the ground or looks up at the stars will remember you and love you, because I love you that much." - Clary to Jace

"You mended my heart," he whispered. "You picked up the pieces of a broken, angry boy and you made him into a happy man, Clary." "No," she said voice shaking. "You did that. I just—cheered you on from the sidelines." "I wouldn't be here without you," he said, soft as music against her lips. "Not just you—Alec, Isabelle, even Simon—but you're my heart." "And you're mine," she said. "You know that."

"I was going to ask you again tonight," he said. "I thought about it for a long time. I didn't want to pressure you. But I decided to trust what you said—that you only said no because of your vision," he said. "Since I met you, Clary, you have been the blade in my hand, even when I carried no weapons. I could always fight any demons but my own. You were my sword and shield against every moment I felt worthless, against every moment I hated myself, against every time I thought I wasn't good enough."

"You taught me it takes more bravery to love completely than it does to walk unharmed into a battle," he said. "To love you and to be loved by you is an honor, Clary." She grinned at him. "And what do I get in return for that honor?" "My sparkling wit," he said. "My charming company. my good looks. And. . ." He looked up at her suddenly serious. "My heart, for all my days of my life." She bent down to kiss him. "And you have mine," she said.

"I love you, Jace Herondale. I love you and I need you like light and air, like my chalk and paint, like beautiful things in the world." - Clary

Jace and Alec parabatai quotes

Jace and Alec moments

Here's a link to a post of mine that have my favorite Jace and Alec moments

And here's some Graphic Novel babes for you

Also I'll make a post about the people they've helped and been there for it's something I have actually been wanting to do 😎

[ufuckingpastry]

These Bonds We Keep

AO3 Link (this fic is very long btw)

This fic is based on the characters in the DreamSMP, not the content creators. Any views expressed in this fic are not a reflection of the content creators in any shape or form.

Relationships: Dream/Technoblade - Kismesistude/Rival Shipping Technoblade/Philza - Moirallegiance/Platonic Relationship

This is a continuation of Where Gods and Monsters Meet, but it not necessary to read that to understand this fic. 

@meepishme

CW: graphic depictions of violence, hallucinations, suicidal thoughts, suicide attempt (based on game mechanics), self harm

Summary: I have all the time in the world to wait for you, Blood God. And, one way or another, you will become mine.

Technoblade could hear the triumph in the egg's voice. Like the slow, smug flicking tail, the egg felt victory against its opponent. Because he was trapped with it and he had nowhere to run. And yet… Technoblade smiled despite it all. And he could feel the egg's shock, faint and unnatural as it was. Because he knew this game. He knew what it took to be patient in the face of an unwavering enemy and still come out the victor. He knew what it would take. So, he settled in, grinning at the ghost of red before him, and breathed out. The red parted and he took solace in that, at least.

"If the mind is willing, the flesh could go on and on without many things," he recited quietly. "You underestimate me. And that will be your downfall."

The whooshing of the portal faded as Technoblade descended the steps towards the community house. Someone had recently built it back up, even nicer than it was before. But the holes in the dirt still belied what had turned it to rubble. He recalled Ranboo telling him and Phil, his hands twisting and tapping in uncomfortable motions, that he blew it up. Later, after Dream had been locked up, Phil mentioned that Dream had done it as they sat by the fire. They discussed why Ranboo might believe he had blown it up instead. That conversation left an uncomfortable sting of acid in Technoblade’s stomach. That kid didn’t deserve any problems thrown his way. He thought about when Ranboo gifted him a new netherite axe. “Rent” they called it. Payment for living on his property. But in recent weeks, Technoblade found that the kid was growing on him. They explored maps of distant places, arguing over golden apples. The last time they had gone into a woodland mansion, Technoblade found him backed up in a corner. Technoblade hadn’t remembered much after that, but he remembered Ranboo afraid, but steeling himself against an unwinnable fight. He jumped in alongside him and they cut down their foes together. As Technoblade passed through the community house and out the other side, he wondered if Ranboo was fixing the house up out of misplaced guilt. He pressed his lips together and made a note to talk to Ranboo about it soon. The kid was brave, but he was also real jumpy. Technoblade dutifully described his visit to Dream when he returned home a week ago. Ranboo seemed relieved that it was the same as Tommy's retelling, but it felt as though he was still hiding something from them. That might be Technoblade reading too much into it, but still… Caution was the thing that kept them safe. Phil always reminded them of that, especially when Technoblade got a little too bloodthirsty that he forgot himself. He made a note to remind Phil to be there when they talked with Ranboo. Phil was much better at reading social situations than he was.  

Technoblade hiked the axe up on his shoulder as he walked, his thoughts straying from Ranboo as he scanned the area. He frowned, eyeing the vines. They grew more every time he came through. He cut away some of the vines that were in his way, though he never lingered around them too long. It was hard to tell in the fresh air like this, but something smelled off about them. The voices in his head seemed to agree. He tossed away the vine blocks at the voices’ request. As he walked further, he saw Ranboo delightedly hugging a grass block. Technoblade’s shoulders relaxed at the sight of a genuinely happy Ranboo. He stepped up close to the kid and waved.

“Techno!” Ranboo greeted. The nickname made him smile. He usually only let Phil or Dream call him that, but he wasn’t about to cut Ranboo short. If it made him happy to call him that, then who was Technoblade to stop him?

“Hey, Ranboo. What are you up to?” They caught up for a bit, walking around a few steps as Ranboo placed grass and picked more up. He found it nice to talk to him and he relaxed bit by bit. After a while, as the sun reached and passed its highest point, Ranboo made noises about having to go soon. Technoblade rested a hand on his shoulder. “Hold up. Phil’s making some stew tonight. He always makes too much, if you want to stop by. We’d be glad to have you.”

“Oh, uh, yeah! Sounds good!” Ranboo smiled and Technoblade felt his chest warm at the sight. He waved Ranboo off. He turned around and started for the Prime Path, but paused. Bad was standing on some of the vines, the ones he had chopped up, watching them. The vines glowed gently and grew just under Bad’s feet, completing the chain again. Technoblade’s smile faded as his gaze flicked back up to Bad. His hood was white, which… Wasn’t it red? Technoblade adjusted the axe on his shoulder. Bad started walking towards him. The voices in his head rose to a steady thrum, conflicting as always, but this time it set him on edge. He rolled his shoulders as he watched Bad’s approach.

“Good afternoon, Technoblade,” Bad greeted warmly. Technoblade raised a few fingers in response, but remained otherwise silent. His gaze did catch on movement in the distance behind Bad. Antfrost was also approaching now, making a beeline for their small group. Technoblade’s silent response didn’t seem to deter Bad. “Lovely day out, isn’t it?”

“There something you want, Bad?” Technoblade asked. He didn’t really want to be sociable more than he had to at any given point. He had already spent long enough here and he had things he wanted to finish before he went back home for dinner. But Bad seemed like he genuinely wanted something from him. At his question, Bad’s face brightened.

“Well, yes, actually. What do you know about the egg, Technoblade?”

---

The first thing Technoblade noticed when they entered the cave was the smell. The cave smelled of blood. Putrid, poisoned, diseased. It was a sickness that made his stomach roil. He swallowed bile as he looked upon the egg, stepping carefully over pits of lava and magma as he followed Bad. The voices, usually a cacophony of conflicting desires, now grew in a chorus of one word: RUN. He eyed the egg, used to ignoring the voices. The vines were annoying, but to be here, in the presence of the thing causing their growth, he genuinely felt unsettled. He glanced at Bad, at Antfrost. Their faces, drawn toward the egg, were ones of devotion.

“So,” he started, breaking the silence. “I take it this is the egg?”

“Yes!” Bad clapped his hands together and grinned brightly at Technoblade. “It offers people what they desire, be it power or strength. Anything.”

“Power?” Technoblade asked with a considering tilt of his head. “The power to lead nations? Like a government?”

“No, no, no, not like that. We,” Bad gestured to himself and Antfrost. “We don’t want more governments. All they’ve done is cause war and destruction. The egg doesn’t want governments.”

“You literally have a bunch of signs that say ‘Join the Eggpire’,” Technoblade pointed out. Bad’s expression tightened, as if frustrated. But it vanished and he smiled brightly again. He dismissed Technoblade's point with a wave of his hand.

“That’s just some catchy phrasing. The egg doesn’t want governments.”

“Uh-huh. Then what does it want?”

“Well,” Bad and Antfrost glanced at each other, their smiles growing. They turned back to him simultaneously “Why don’t you listen?”

“Listen?”

“Yes! The egg speaks to all those who will hear it. Listen so that you might hear what it wants.”

Technoblade pressed his lips together, unconvinced. But Bad looked so excited by this idea, so on board with the literal everything going on, that Technoblade decided to humor him at least. He sighed and closed his eyes, focusing on the voices. He brushed past their yelling, down deeper, down to voices he couldn’t hear as well. And, he realized, there was one. It was a small voice, quiet, barely above a whisper. But now given attention, it grew to something recognizable.

Blade. I know you for what you are. God of Blood, God of Vengeance, God that has been Betrayed and Used. Know that I can grant you the power you seek, the power to keep you, make you whole again.

Technoblade stilled, opening his eyes. His gaze focused on the pulsing red of the egg, trying to ground himself even before he realized what was happening. He blinked, red winding its way across his vision. It coiled into images that shifted into shape before him. He saw L’Manberg, burned and blasted, the hole ever expanding. He saw the vines taking root, filling the pit like blood spilled. Overflowing, he saw it, as the voice whispered ever on, slowly overtaking the other voices.

Blood for the Blood God. Nourish me of their flesh and I will return their blood to you tenfold. Blood for the Blood God!

He saw bodies strewn about before him. Thousands, millions, tens. Ever changing, ever flowing, ever beating with his heart. Each one torn apart. Ribcages steaming in the sun, skulls shattered with gray matter strewn across the way, bodies broken, twisted, ruined. Bleeding without a care, without purpose. He saw himself step through them, inside and outside his form all at once. The blood drenched his hands, his clothes, his crown, dripping in vines of freshly spilled blood. He saw himself stop, drop down, and nudge a head up to the sun. Tommy’s eyes, blank, cold, and dead stared past him, horror and betrayal plain in his last moments. As he looked up, he saw them. He saw them all. Their names passing by, their faces turning toward him, their eyes on him as they bled out. Bled out for him. Niki, Punz, Ranboo, Tommy, Tubbo, Jack, Puffy, Sam… He lifted his gaze and saw two bodies strung out for him, their bodies opened and spilling out blood and entrails, and he saw their faces plain as day. Horror, pure terror flooded his system at the sight of these bodies. These bodies, the bodies of those he most cared for, of those he would stop at nothing to fix the suffering they experienced, or aid what he could not fix. Those he felt tied to and those he would be tied to the end of days. Phil's body, wings broken and ruined. Dream's body, gutted and empty. He could hear the egg singing worship at the scene, calling it sacrament… The implication that he… that he had done this…

Technoblade stumbled back from the egg, eyes wild and teeth bared. His breaths came in pants, his axe in his hand. He saw movement next to him. He lurched towards it, aiming to strike, aiming to maim, to kill!

Bleed them! Bleed them for me!

Technoblade stumbled at the voice, the red in his vision vanishing. Bad and Antfrost stared at him, their own weapons at the ready, their eyes wide. Technoblade realized himself and he forced his breath to slow. Once he felt calm, calmer, he hooked his axe on his back once more. He shook his head in an attempt to rid the egg’s voice from his head. He had to get out. He had to leave, leave, leave, RUN! Technoblade took a step back from them, from the egg. His ears twitched back, flat against his head to block out the voice even though he knew it would do nothing. He took another step back, nearly stumbling over the magma block behind him.

“No, nope. No, not today. Not this. Nope.” He looked up at the egg, its disease burning his lungs, and turned on his heel. He heard Bad call out and he heard him running after him, words stumbling on his tongue to slow down. Halfway across the room, the exit in sight, Bad grabbed his cloak. Technoblade turned so fast Bad flinched back, releasing the cloak to reach for a weapon. Technoblade’s eyes burned with rage and it was with a snarl he silenced both the egg and Bad’s protests. “I will destroy this place,” he growled, his voice trembling in his rage. “I will. Destroy this place. I will destroy the egg. I will fill this room with TNT and I will burn this place to ash! To bedrock! What I did to L’Manberg, I will do to this place a thousand times over!” Technoblade straightened and looked down upon them, a wrathful god barely held in check. “And I would suggest you stand aside before I burn you too.”

Bad pressed his lips together, thinking fast. Technoblade could almost hear the gears turning in his head. He held his hands out in a staying gesture, a rare sign of surrender. Technoblade did not trust him, nor the words that would soon spill from his mouth.

“I feel like there are some misunderstandings here. How about this? We go and talk. Away from the egg. Above ground. Before we do anything too rash, let’s talk.” Technoblade’s eyes narrowed. He knew a bad idea when he saw one. But his position would not change. And if Bad wanted to try to talk, to placate him… He would let him try, if only to see him tremble beneath his failure. Technoblade unhooked his axe and gestured for him to lead the way.

Bad led them above ground, led them to a suspiciously egg-shaped building. Technoblade stopped outside the building, eyeing the blood vines growing over the structure. He tilted his head, listening. The egg’s voice still haunted him, but it grew faint. He assumed it wouldn’t leave completely until he went back home.

He hoped.

“Before we go in,” Bad started, hands in front of him. “I would like to talk without the threat of weapons and armor.”

“No.”

“Here, as a show of good faith.” Bad started to remove his armor, then glanced at Antfrost and gestured sharply with his head. Antfrost followed suit, though his limbs seemed to shake more in front of the still very armed Technoblade. Bad put his items into the chest at the door and gestured for Technoblade to do the same.

“You must think I’m some kind of idiot. I threatened you with decimation and you say you simply want to talk. And now you’re asking me to remove my gear in the name of good faith?” Technoblade snarled at him. Bad smiled, bright eyes and a challenge in his voice.

“Are you cowing away from us, Technoblade? We are unarmed and you still consider us to be a threat? A snake without venom is no more a threat than a gust of wind.”

“Venom is ultimately a defense. You are a virus, an attacker. A disease that must be burned clean.”

“Take off your armor, Technoblade. And let us talk.”

Technoblade considered him. He didn’t know Bad well, had never taken the time to get to know him. With this egg business, he didn’t want to take the time. He adjusted the axe over his shoulder, making decisions and plans. He should have messaged Phil. He’ll be late for dinner.

“Let me search you, and I might consider leaving behind my weapons.” Technoblade said, letting his axe drop off his shoulder. Bad’s expression was tight, the fingers stilled. Then he opened them and lifted his arms.

“Alright. I can promise you I have no tricks up my sleeve.”

Technoblade grunted, not convinced, and searched him. He found nothing on Bad: nothing to harm, nothing to heal, nothing to poison. Just… nothing. Technoblade stepped back and gestured Antfrost over so he could search him as well. Antfrost’s inventory was much the same, though…

“Bruh,” Technoblade said, holding up the maid outfit. Bad had his head in his hands, muttering quietly to himself as Antfrost bounced on his heels nervously. “You know what… I don’t want to know.” He gave Antfrost the maid outfit back, feeling… settled was the wrong word. But it seemed Bad had not lied. Technoblade still did not trust him, but perhaps… He had thorns on his armor and they would not be fast enough to equip in time if they decided to attack him. He preferred an axe or a sword in his hands, but he had enough experience in hand-to-hand combat that he didn’t think the lack of one would be a problem.

“Alright. No weapons.” He removed his weapons, his tools too, in a show of “good faith”. When Antfrost went to pick them up, he growled a warning. Antfrost jumped back quickly, his fear scent keeping Techno from relaxing all the way. “So,” he said, turning to Bad. “You wanted to talk?”

“Yes, inside.” Bad lead them into the building and Technoblade took a second just inside the door to scan his surroundings. There wasn’t much to the building. The most notable features were a chest and an obsidian table. It briefly reminded him of the table Phil and him found in the stronghold. His was better than this obsidian mess. His table was unbreakable. Technoblade took a spot closest to the door, not sitting, his muscles tense to run back for his weapons at the first sign of trouble. Antfrost waited at the side, watching. For the first time, Technoblade noticed his eyes were red. Strange. Bad was gesturing again and Technoblade's gaze snapped sharply at the movement. Unperturbed, Bad continued with his talk.

"All the things that have happened to us has been because of governments and the people who blindly follow them, looking for a leader. What we offer, what the egg offers is stable ground in a chaotic world. It offers power to those who seek it and guides them in ways if they are struggling to find it. The egg does not want government. It wants land that will nourish it and, in return, it will nourish those who protect it. Technoblade, for every battle you have fought here, for every person who has recruited you, they have seen you not as a person, but as ‘The Blade’. They have seen you as a weapon to be used and abandoned once your purpose is fulfilled. But we are not them. We see you as a person, Technoblade. We see what you can become when you are treated as one.

“What we want, what the egg wants, is for you to be its defender. The egg has many enemies. Enemies who would strike it down without further thought. You are here, even though you threatened to become one of those enemies. You are here of your own accord and that is all we are asking for.”

Technoblade listened to Bad speak and he found… If Bad had started with this, if he had waited to show him the egg, then his decision might have been different. Bad’s words were moving and they pulled at him. They were true. Very few people here had treated him as a person. And those who did, he held onto tight and fast, unable to allow them to stray too far lest they disappear into the wind like ghosts. If Bad had started with this…

But he hadn’t. And Technoblade’s decision was not going to change.

He tilted his head and lifted his lip up in a snarl. “What sort of fool do you think I am, Bad? The egg simply wants me to be its defender? Bullshit. Do you even know what the egg promised me?” Technoblade asked. Bad’s expression didn’t change, though there was a brightness in his eyes that Technoblade did not like. He stepped up onto the table, forcing Bad to look up at him. “You talk about the loyalty people have shown me and how little it mattered to them. And yet, you think the egg shows unfailing loyalty to you? For your blood, for your flesh, it promised me power. It switches sides for whoever it decides will serve it best.” He stopped in the center of the table, growling now. “Even if no one else does in this miserable place, I will stand by my word. I will destroy that thing. I will blow that room up, deeper than the pit that was L’Manberg, wider than the stars reach across the sky! And I will burn you too if you stand in my way.”

Bad’s expression twitched, but it was still that unreadable smile. Technoblade could taste Antfrost’s fear and feel his quivering breath. He was afraid, but Bad…

“I’m sorry to hear that, Technoblade. And I’m sorry you feel that way.” As Bad spoke, he shifted to the side. Everything in Technoblade went cold as the home Phil waited in for him. There was a button behind his back, one hidden throughout their whole conversation. “But I can’t let you do that.”

Bad slammed his fist back on the button. Technoblade lurched forward, but it was a second too late. The ground fell away beneath his feet and he threw out a hand. Hooved hands caught on the cracks in the obsidian table, his body dangling above a pit. The egg’s voice surged up to meet him at the same time Bad’s foot stomped on his fingers. Technoblade cried out as pain shattered down his arm. He glared up at Bad from his place beneath him.

“I think you need to spend some more time with the egg, Technoblade. At least, until you start to see things our way.”

“I’LL REND YOUR FLESH FROM BONE, BAD!”

“Oh, shut up, why don’t you?” Bad smashed Technoblade’s fingers beneath his foot, then kicked him away. Technoblade fell into the pit, landing with a sickening CRACK! Technoblade’s vision went black for a moment as he dropped to the floor. He was not dead, but almost. Fuck. He felt over his leg, tearing off armor to get at the bone sticking out of his leg. Fuck. Technoblade tore a piece of cloth from his shirt, stuffed it between his teeth, and worked on snapping the bone back in place. This was not the first time and he knew how to do it so it wouldn’t heal wrong. The pain was still the same, almost enough to make him black out. At first, he thought he did, with how dark the pit went. A look up revealed that they had close the table up again. He could just barely hear Bad and Antfrost’s voices talking together. He was too far down and…

Technoblade took stock of his surroundings, horror drilling him deep to his bones. He was above the egg. Directly. Above. Trapped in obsidian and no tools to save him. And the voice, that damned voice, was whispering again. Welcoming him back home. It embraced him like an old friend. When he threw himself back from it, only the cold obsidian caught him. Its voice crept like fingers over the back of his neck, gentle caresses along his ears, playing with him, toying with him. Like a cat who's cornered a mouse and batting it along because it thinks it's funny. He snarled at it, bared his tusks and teeth. If he was a mouse, the least he could do was to blind that son of a bitch. And the voice

The voice parted. It parted like soil beneath a hoe. But unlike soil, it flowed back into the space he made between them. He could almost see it. See it like red in his vision, blood in the water, like Phil's tea as it steeped. Idly mixing with the air around him, only growing violent when agitated. Technoblade realized with dawning horror that the egg was no longer digging its claws into him, unrelenting in its attack lest he escape and flee. No… now he had no escape, nowhere to turn and run. He was trapped. And the egg knew. It knew and it had changed behavior.

I have all the time in the world to wait for you, Blood God. And, one way or another, you will become mine.

He could hear the triumph in its voice. Like the slow, smug flicking tail, the egg felt victory against its opponent. Because he was trapped with it and he had nowhere to run. And yet… Technoblade smiled despite it all. Despite the lingering pain from his fall, despite the scent of blood filling his nose, despite the darkness and the heat, he smiled. And he could feel the egg's shock, faint and unnatural as it was. Because he knew this game. He knew what it took to be patient in the face of an unwavering enemy and still come out the victor. He knew what it would take. So, he settled in, grinning at the ghost of red before him, and breathed out. The red parted and he took solace in that, at least.

"If the mind is willing, the flesh could go on and on without many things," he recited quietly. "You underestimate me. And that will be your downfall."

And so, the war with the egg began. It was a mental war, a test of wills, and it was one of the most grueling wars he had faced. The egg sometimes grew malicious, striking at the heart of him. He witnessed visions of his friends suffering, the people he knew hurting in ways almost unimaginable. Sometimes the egg offered him the power to fix this suffering and sometimes it offered the power to cause it instead. Sometimes, he would wake bathed in blood and gore, knowing intimately who it had come from. Sometimes, he would wake wrapped in vines, never knowing where he ended and the egg began. And sometimes, he would wake and he would see Phil, reaching for him. And, in the weak times, he would reach out and Phil would fade like smoke around his fingertips.

Sometimes, the egg would leave him alone. He knew it was gathering strength. He knew it was feeding from the ground, from the creatures that got too close. He didn’t know when it happened, but one day he felt immense pain and he lashed out. His fingers caught on the obsidian and he realized, in panting breaths, that he could feel when someone cut the vines. He hugged himself, breath shaking, and the voice returned.

It hurts, doesn’t it? When they hurt us, we can feel it. When they feed us, we no longer hunger. We can survive upon the ground, but we hunger, don’t we? Blood God of mine, we hunger.

“I am not yours,” Technoblade hissed. “I will never be yours.” The voice faded into laughter and Technoblade saw nothing but visions of death and blood again.

He could not keep track of time down in the cave. He did not know how long he sat, how long he waited. He knew at one point he woke and his armor was gone. He had nothing to protect himself, besides the cloak that he hugged around himself. His stomach twisted in pain. He ran out of food long ago. Water was scarce too, and the heat felt close to that of the nether. He was so thirsty… He opened his eyes and saw the ghost of blood again. It never had a face and its body wavered like smoke. But this time, it lifted its arm. Technoblade, weary from the fight, didn’t realize his body was following suit.

Drink up, my friend. God of Blood, mine. Drink and be nourished.

Technoblade’s mouth watered and he bit down. Flesh gave way under his teeth and liquid flowed onto his tongue. He lapped it up like a dying man in the desert. He could not taste it, as far gone into his head as he was. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw golden streams dripping down. And he felt, suddenly, something dripping down his skin. His flesh burned, faintly, and he wondered why. Why did he hurt, even as he drank?

He watched idly as the golden liquid splashed down at his feet and onto the egg. The ghost shivered into light, keening in joy. His ears flattened and he flinched back from the deafening crash. There was a feeling of tearing and Technoblade winced. His fog cleared and found he felt pain, intense pain, and he

Technoblade released his arm in horror, staring down at the wound. The wound burned, his golden blood dripping down the length of his arm, down the corners of his mouth, down to the egg where it rejoiced at the offering. He snarled and ripped off his shirt to wrap it around his arm. Slow the bleeding, cover it and protect it from infection. His gazed snapped back up to the red ghost, but it dissipated before he could growl. He hugged himself and slumped down. He could feel himself fading again. The egg was a powerful influence in his head, easily overtaking the other voices. Even those faded into almost nothing now as the egg left him alone. It was strange to not hear them, to not hear their faint buzzing. But what use would they be to him?

He could not run. He could not escape. He would die down here. Die or belong to the egg. He lifted a shaking hand to his cheek and felt over the lines in his flesh. The corruption was already taking root, breaking through his skin. Vines twisted around his heart, around his lungs, until every moment, every breath, was controlled by the egg. His hand stilled and

He considered it. Technoblade considered his death. He had escaped it hundreds of times. Technoblade never dies! But here… maybe. His hand twitched and he glanced down at it, considering. If he died here… he would wake up in his bed. Back home. He would wake up to the light spilling in through his window, to the sounds of Phil and Steve below. Steve's soft growls as he tried to eat whatever breakfast Phil was preparing. Maybe Ranboo would stop by too, dance around the polar bear as he eagerly showed a new map. And they could go together, shove playfully into each other as they searched for new adventures. Phil would stay home, watch the stasis chamber for when they wanted to come back. And he would be down a life, but maybe… if it meant the ghosts he saw were nothing more than ghosts and not proof of his losing battle…

Technoblade tested it, pressed his fingers into the wound on his arm. It would be easy to find a vein to rip--

NO!

Technoblade jerked back, the feeling of hands on his skull, hands on his arms and fingers, stilling him, freezing him in place with the strength of the egg's will. He stared, wide eyed, into the burning pits of the red ghost.

You are MINE and I will not have you escaping!

And Technoblade

Technoblade filed that reaction away, in the depths of his mind where the vines could not reach, for later. The egg didn’t want him to die, to escape. It wanted him near, to finish corrupting him. He was weary from the fight and he was losing. The egg knew this too. It hummed with victory. It burned bright with sickening delight. He could hear it chanting, singing praises that they would wipe clean this world until all that left was blood. Blood for the true blood god. And he knew that it would make him its puppet. He was already bound in its vines. But…

If he could escape…

There was no totem of undying in his hands this time. But if it feared his death… If it feared him escaping through death, then perhaps…

Perhaps, he still had hope left.

The next time he woke, Technoblade heard voices. With how faint they were, he assumed it was simply the familiar buzzing coming back to poke and prod, see if he was still alive. But they came closer, armored footsteps clacking against stone and muffled as they stepped on and around the vines. So not another hallucination either. His eyes were kept closed, but he tilted his head to listen, to pinpoint their location. The voices quieted as they climbed up next to the egg. Then, one of them spoke again, directed at his cage.

“Hello Technoblade,” Bad greeted. Technoblade could hear the smile in his voice. “It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”

Technoblade inhaled through his nose, eyes still closed. He didn’t want to see him, didn’t want to be reminded of the one who trapped him here in the first place. He heard Bad equip something and tap the metal bit against the obsidian walls. A pickaxe, based on how the sound echoed.

“How do you feel about the egg, Technoblade?” When he didn’t answer, Bad slammed the pickaxe against the wall. “Answer! Or we’ll leave you here again.”

Technoblade huffed a laugh. He lifted his head up towards Bad, his eyes opening. He peered through the holes in the obsidian, staring at Bad’s face. He wanted an answer, huh? Then he’d give him one.

“Heed,” Technoblade said, his voice hoarse from disuse. His hand reached for the obsidian he’d broken from his earlier attempts at escape, closing around the sharpened point. Bad’s face contorted in confusion and Technoblade pressed on. “Heed, ye mortals. Heed the words of your prophets, lest they be true. Ye people, fearful of death and stillness, heed!” Technoblade stood as he spoke, eyes bright and wild. The words were an old speech he and Philza made together. Old friends aiming to strike fear and wonder in their enemies. “Your end beckons! The Angel of Death comes, his sword sharpened and called to your blood! His wings glow bright and his mercy has faded. Woe to thee, ye peoples laid low by sin and hate! Repent before him, and your deaths will be swift.” Technoblade stepped back, his hands raising before him, his golden blood dried and stained down the one arm. He revealed the obsidian blade, turning it towards his neck. Bad’s eyes widened in growing realization and Technoblade grinned at him. “I will soon rest my head in holy arms and he will rain fire upon you! HEED! FOR THIS IS YOUR END!” His movement swift, he aimed the blade straight for his neck. Bad lurched forward, a cry on his lips, but it was too late-!

NO!

The blade dropped from Technoblade’s hand and he slapped his hands over his ears. The egg shrieked, louder than anything, louder than explosions and withers, and he dropped to his knees. Its rage and fear shattered through him and his voice joined the cacophony in his head. His scream tore through his throat until he tasted blood.

Bad and Antfrost flinched back from the force of the egg’s shriek. Bad risked a glance back through the obsidian and saw Technoblade screaming with his hands over his ears. Bad’s breath came quick and he squeezed his hand around his pickaxe. They had to stop him, they… Someone would hear. Someone would hear! Bad cut away the obsidian and grabbed Technoblade by the cloak. He hauled backwards, dragging Technoblade’s body out of the cage. At the movement, Technoblade jumped up and aimed fingers curled like claws at Bad’s face. Bad reared back and dropped him. He crumpled to the floor of the cave. Even now, even with blood on his hands from where his flesh cut on the blade, even after three days in isolation, he looked like a wild beast. He snarled like one, struggling to stand to his feet. Bad pointed the pickaxe at Technoblade.

“Why won’t you stop! The egg has you! We’ve won!” Bad shouted.

“Won?” Technoblade laughed. Something sounded like it was bubbling out of him and Bad watched blood drip down from his lips. He coughed and laughed and coughed and laughed and then launched at Bad. He tackled him to the floor, knocked the breath out of him. Bad felt heat near his face as Technoblade forced him closer to a pit of lava. Suddenly, the weight lifted off of him. Bad sat up, coughing air back into his lungs. Antfrost had grabbed Technoblade and dragged him back. Like a beast, the piglin turned back on him, snarling as he aimed his tusks for Ant’s face. He blocked him with his shield, shoved him off. Unarmored and lacking weapons, Technoblade was still dangerous. He looked insane, the corruption evident on his face, but he still looked whole.

Bad heard a growing cacophony as the egg hissed and chanted. He missed some of the words, but it sounded like… It sounded like the egg was urging Technoblade on, urging him to kill Antfrost. Bad’s head snapped towards the egg, betrayal spiking through him like the prongs of a trident. He saw his plans unraveling before him. He couldn’t think here, not while his friend was in danger, not with the egg’s voice deafening them all with its desires pouring forth. Someone could still hear them! They could come down and stop them!

Bad jumped to his feet and ran to a chest. He dug through it, risking a glance back at Antfrost when he cried out. Technoblade had clawed his face, the blood dripping down his cheek. Ant swung his sword at Technoblade’s head and Bad called out in time to the egg.

“No! We need him!”

Technoblade ducked, but just barely. His reflexes were slower, his movements jerking even as he fought back. He had to be close to death! Bad couldn’t let him die! Not here! He turned back to the chest, digging through its contents until his hands closed around his prize. Bad spun on his heel and threw the potion of slowness at Technoblade, then leapt towards him with the rope. Technoblade tried to react, tried to claw him too. Bad dodged the blow, then caught him with a punch to the chin. Technoblade stumbled back, doubling over. Taking his chance, Bad looped the rope around Technoblade’s throat, a noose, and hauled back on the rope. Antfrost threw his body against him and pinned him to the ground. Bad pulled a muzzle out of his inventory and secured it around Technoblade’s snarling mouth. Technoblade coughed and choked and Bad loosened the rope just enough to let him breathe.

“What,” Antfrost panted, glancing up at Bad. “What are we going to do now?”

Bad licked his lips, panting in time as he glared back at Technoblade. There weren’t too many people around tonight. They hadn’t seen anyone hanging around. They had time. Not much, probably, but they had time!

“We’re taking him back to my place. We’ll force him to change his respawn point. And then we’ll make sure he loves the egg.”

---

Philza heard the polar bears shuffling outside and a shocked little “Oh!”. Footsteps up the stairs, then a shifting of weight, then a tentative knock. He sighed, touched the sword at his side to remind him it was there, and opened the door.

“Puffy?”

“Oh! Phil! Do… do you live here?” Puffy asked, quickly glancing over her shoulder. She was decked out in full netherite. Worry and determination dripped off her like rain on feathers.

“Yes.” Philza let her in. It was cold this afternoon, even colder without Technoblade around. “Puffy, how did you find this place?”

“Oh, well, Tommy mentioned when I asked.”

Of course, he did, Philza thought with an annoyed huff. He gestured for her to sit, but she didn’t take the opportunity. “Are you… okay?” He asked, slowly turning towards her as he grabbed his mug of tea. It was peppermint, to soothe the nerves. It was Techno's favorite.

“No, not really.” The honesty was strange to hear, not because he assumed to hear a lie, but because Philza had grown used to trying to decipher Techno’s tone when he was trying to be sincere, or when he was hiding things. Puffy was still talking so Philza turned his attention back to her. “Bad tried to take me out and I was looking for Technoblade because I wanted his help.”

“His help?”

“Phil, what do you know about the egg?”

“The thing that’s causing all the red vines to grow? What about it?”

Philza listened to Puffy and her story. He listened to how they found the egg in the pit of L’Manberg, their decisions on what to do with it, and the effects it was having on people. The more she talked, the more his horror grew. His wings puffed out with his growing dread.

“Sam had only been in there for a few hours and it made him start eating his own flesh! It has to go, but I don’t know who I can trust anymore. I wanted to talk to Technoblade and see if we can’t do something about it ourselves. Have you seen him recently?”

“No, I… I haven’t. He’s been gone for three days and I’m starting to get worried. No message, no warning, nothing.”

Puffy opened her mouth when the doors slammed open. Puffy jolted up, sword already drawn, and swinging to face the attacker. Ranboo jumped back with a chirp, hands up in the air.

“Sorry, uh, I tried to open it and the wind caught it.” Ranboo glanced at Puffy, then at Philza, who was busying himself with his cup of tea. “Did I interrupt something?”

“No, you can come in,” Philza said before Puffy could say anything. “He lives nearby and I invited him to dinner,” he said as explanation. Puffy slowly sat back down, her weapon sheathed. A thought came to him and he turned to Ranboo. “Ranboo, have you seen Techno? He was passing by L’Manberg the last time we spoke.”

“Oh!” He opened up one of his memory books and flipped through the pages. “Yeah, I saw him over there. Uh, three days ago?”

That matched up with the timeline, but…

“No sooner?”

“Nope.”

Philza frowned, his fingers tapping on the table as he thought. He had tried messaging him the other day, worry eating at his edges when Techno didn't come home for dinner. But all he received was static. That happened sometimes, when Techno was too far away, but he couldn't have made it that far in a day, even if he used the nether portals. Sometimes they’d get interference, but that was too hard to track. Something was up and Philza was determined to get to the bottom of it.

"Did something happen to him?" Ranboo asked, standing far from Puffy.

"We don't know for sure yet. But this is strange behavior, even from him." Philza tipped back the rest of his tea and pushed up from the table. He rummaged through the chests, equipping his gear in silence. When he turned back, he rested his hand on his sword to remind him it was there. "Let's go find out."

Philza led them through the nether portal, striding across the cobblestone path with purpose. Puffy followed him, her stride matching his, while Ranboo took up the rear. They weren't in the nether for long when Ranboo made a familiar chirp of Ender. Philza stopped and turned towards him, quirking up his eyebrow as he waited to hear what Ranboo remembered.

"I saw Techno, Bad, and Antfrost go into that weird egg building too. You know the one?"

Philza did not, but by the way Puffy stiffened, she did. That kind of reaction did not bode well.

"Technoblade went in there? With Bad?" She asked, growing panic seeping into her voice. At Ranboo's nod, she swore. "That's the place they trapped Sam in! We have to get to him!"

Philza felt something sharp twist in his chest. That was the place? Where Sam had been trapped and made to eat his own flesh? Philza's mind was racing now with the implications. Sam had only been there for a few hours, but if the worst had truly come to past and Techno had been down there for three days…

They had to hurry. But something kept him there, still and indecisive. He glanced at Ranboo and felt that same sharp twisting in his chest. The kid was shaking, minutely, but shaking. Philza remembered just a few days ago, when Ranboo was fixing up his house, he admitted some of his fears. He didn't want to get dragged into more stuff. Not after everything that happened. The quiet in the snowy biome was good and safe. He looked so relaxed and happy. He did not look that way now, not with the way he was inching towards the portal to run. Philza was determined to protect him from suffering any more than he already had. The decision was made even before he finished thinking it, as he opened his mouth to speak.

"Ranboo, go back to the house." Puffy cried out in protest, but he overruled her. "We might be wrong. Go back to the house and message me the second you see Techno, if he comes home before us." Ranboo straightened and hurried back through the portal. Puffy watched him go with a mix of frustration and confusion clear on her face.

"Do you really think that--"

"No," Philza replied immediately, not caring that he had interrupted her. "But that kid doesn't need to be dragged into any more shit."

Puffy looked back at the portal and nodded, finally. Philza started back down the path, but when he didn't hear her follow, he turned back. She raised up a hand to shush whatever he was about to say, tilting her head in that way that meant she was messaging someone.

"Hey, Sam?"

Dream watched Sam set down the bowl of soup on the netherite wall between them, eyeing it hungrily. Sam opened his mouth to say something, but crackling filled the space between them and the words were lost forever.

"Puffy?"

Dream hummed, inching towards the wall impatiently. He watched him intently as he had a conversation right in front of his dinner. He wasn't allowed to grab it before Sam stepped back, in case he tried to do something rash.

"Technoblade? No, I have not seen him since he visited the prison last week. Why?"

At the mention of his partner, Dream blinked and stepped closer, analyzing Sam's face as he frowned. Sam shook his head, taking a step back. Panic was winding tight around him and it set off old alerts in Dream’s brain.

"With Bad? No, no, that's not- nothing good will come of that."

"Sam, what's going on?" Dream asked. The mention of Bad was… it made his heart twist sharply. He missed him, but why was Technoblade with Bad? Sam didn’t respond to him, instead shaking his head slowly.

“Puffy, I would come and help, but…” He glanced at Dream. Dream knew the look of someone considering decisions and watched Sam make up his mind. He turned away from Dream, stepped back, and crossed the lava pit. The netherite wall didn't lower, not even as Sam deliberately walked to the levers. Before the lava came down, he heard Sam's voice echo through the prison.

"INITIATE CODE 7 LOCKDOWN." Dream blinked, pressed close to the wall. Lockdown? Total lockdown? What the hell was happening? And why did it involve Technoblade?

And it was in that moment, as the lava dripped down, that he heard screaming.

Dream went still. Sam wouldn’t hear it, couldn’t hear it. But Dream could. He could hear Techno screaming. Technoblade could shout, growl, snarl, but Dream rarely heard him scream. He closed his eyes, pinpointing the location. Deep underground, nearby. The sound echoed; he was in a cave. But… Where! His jaws dropped in, a growl starting low in his chest. That was a scream of pain. It was not a sound he had ever heard from Techno and to hear it come from his mouth sent Dream’s body transforming before he could slow it. He ripped off the mask, let it clatter to the side. His clothes went next; they never survived the transformation. A wild glance at the netherite wall made him pause for only a second. Then he grabbed the clock and brought it close to his chest. Breaking the wall first would take too long and he would need the netherite next. But the lockdown meant it would not go back down until Sam decided it could. And he needed to get out. He felt his flesh change slowly. It was too slow, far too slow. He could no longer hear Technoblade screaming and he did not know whether he preferred it that way. He willed his flesh to change to gold. It would be better, easier to slip over the wall if he was already malleable. Finally, finally, it was enough. He tossed aside the clock, heard it shatter against the obsidian as he squeezed over the wall. Pain shot through his system like fractures as a rib broke under the pressure. It didn’t matter. It didn’t MATTER!

Dream gave himself a moment to breathe through the pain once he was on the other side. Belatedly, he realized his soup was splattered across the floor. It didn’t matter. He pressed his back to the netherite wall, willing his flesh to change again. Netherite was harder, but at least he was already gold. That helped. That helped. When he was fully netherite, he glared at the lava, panting. His body had finished the transformation and he felt old and new at once. It had been far too long since he took this form. It had been far too long. Already, he could feel himself slipping. Slipping away from Dream, the mastermind of this realm. Away from Dream the prisoner, away from the name he had given himself in an attempt to hide the worst of him. To hide the nightmare he was.

He pounced into the lava, the heat immediate. But netherite did not burn. Netherite would protect him until he got to where he knew he could break out. He knew the plans for this prison, he had helped Sam design it. He knew where weaknesses lied and where he could push through, even weakened as he was. He swam up to the ceiling, hooked his claws in between the cracks, and began digging.

---

Technoblade stumbled forward, his vision swimming. Antfrost pushed him forward again with the tips of his trident. He glared behind him, growling still. They had dragged him up from the cave to the surface. They were taking him to Bad’s house. To force him to respawn there should he die. His attempt to escape worked, but only just. He was out, away from the egg, but he was restrained. The muzzle around his mouth was secured tightly, the noose around his neck choking him every time his steps trailed. He felt so weak from his time with the egg. His broken leg felt wrong, given little time to heal before he was back on it. Another push from Antfrost sent him crumpling to the ground.

“Get up,” Bad said from above him. Technoblade didn’t feel like he had the strength to. When he didn’t move, Bad’s foot kicked into his side. “I said, get. Up.” From his place on the ground, Technoblade started laughing.

“What if I don’t?” he asked past the muzzle, turning onto his side to breathe. “Are you going to kill me?”

“You know I can’t do that. Not before I know where you’ll spawn.”

“And what’s your plan after? Give me to the egg? Even when I come back I won’t love the egg! You and it can rot with me!”

Bad growled. He dragged him up by the cloak and shoved him forward again. Technoblade stumbled a few more steps before turning around.

“Your plans failed!” Technoblade shouted in crazed delight. He twisted even as the noose went tighter. He dug his hands under the muzzle and, with the last of his strength, he ripped it off. “They have failed and they will fail over and over again! They—” The three of them froze as a dark shape passed over them What the hell? Technoblade lifted his head, eyes widening when he found the shape. He saw it high above them as it hovered, the poison green of its eyes just barely visible. His grin widened and he turned to Bad. With a voice hoarse from screaming, he hissed, “Repent, mortals.”

And then the shape crashed in between them.

---

Finally, finally! Netherite claws burst through obsidian. Dream pulled his body free, the night air cold like ice as lava dripped from his skin. He exhaled a breath, hot steam rising through the chilled air. It was odd to not have the heavy presence of the obsidian surrounding him, feel it cold under his feet. He shook off the rest of the lava, stretching much like a cat as his tail flicked off the rest of it. Time for the last of his transformation, to see if he still could do it. Otherwise, he would have to scale down the wall and risk the warden hearing. Dream focused, rolling his shoulders, until a loud crack split the air like thunder. A wing opened up, heavy and dark like his flesh. Then, the other wing opened. It hurt, after spending so much time hiding them. He stretched them out and groaned low into the air. His mouth didn’t work right in this form, his mouth unable to speak more than a few words of the language of those around him. He remembered briefly how long it took him to learn the language, how much he struggled until he learned how to hide his jaws. He shook his head, refocusing on the task at hand.

Dream opened his mouth, tasting the air. He had to find his rival, his soulbleeder. Wind blew into his face, flowing down his body, and he breathed it in. All his senses lit up as he tasted the blood of his soulbleeder on the wind. His claws dug into the obsidian, a low growl rolling in his chest. He would ruin those who dared to hurt what was his. He leapt off the prison wall and took to the air. It felt like home, even after being grounded for so long. But he couldn’t reminisce. He had to find him. He had to.

The buildings below him looked familiar, but he disregarded them. A lurch of movement caught his eye as he passed over. He studied them briefly, eyes scanning the short shape that dove to the ground and the tall shape reaching for its sword. But neither of them was the one he searched for. He ignored them. Then, like a stain upon this world, Dream saw the demon among them; the wolf in sheep’s clothing. He pulled up, passed over them as he watched. A flash of red, a flash of tusks, and a muzzle ripped free. Dream’s vision tunneled to the figure struggling to stand, but still fighting. His chest twisted, recognition folding his wings, and he dropped to the ground like a stone.

The crash of his impact was deafening. A memory flashed before his eyes: withers reigning terror upon the souls who thought themselves greater than they were and the TNT he dropped upon them for that mistake. This moment reminded him of then. He lifted his head and first looked at his soulbleeder. Techno blinked, recognition washing over his face. Dream rumbled fondly at him, a rare softness. Techno stepped forward, his mouth opening to speak. But he dropped. Dream checked him; he was breathing, just passed out from the effort and strain of his battle. A body stumbled back behind him and Dream swung his head around immediately. His lips lifted in a snarl as he positioned himself between Techno and those who wished to harm him.

The smaller one stumbled back in his fright, netherite sword falling out of his hands and into the dirt. The other, tall and demonic, his tail lashing, smelled… strange. Familiar. It made his chest ache and he didn't remember why. All he remembered was his soulbleeder, his rival. No one else. The demon tilted his head, staring down at the nightmare, paling as recognition hit. Dream's jaws opened, tasting his fear, dropping into a stance to pounce, to go for the throat, and hold until the body stopped thrashing.

"Dream?" came a voice and it halted Dream's motion. He blinked, snarl faded into silence. "Dream? Is… is that you?" Bad asked, voice trembling.

He blinked and

Dream blinked and breathed in deep, tasting the air. Bad, Bad, his friend. Close enough of a friend that he had once almost considered him starfated, if he had known what it meant. Dream's mouth closed and he stepped back from Bad, poison eyes watching him. He reached for Techno, his heart yearning and aching so much he wanted to lay down and whine. Speaking was hard, but he was not so far gone that he couldn't shift his mouth to speak.

"DON'T FOLLOW," Dream growled. With Techno firmly in his claws, Dream took to the sky once more. He did not look back as he flew him home.

Bad watched Dream fly away, his hopes flying away with him. He pressed the heels of his hands to his face and screamed his frustration. It wasn’t fair! It wasn’t FAIR! With a growl of his own, he picked up his trident. The first drops of rain fell on him. With a begging prayer to any god who wouldn’t forsake them, he dropped to a knee to shake Antfrost.

“Come on, you muffin head! We have to go!”

“You’re not going anywhere!” Bad spun on his heel at Puffy’s voice. The rain began to pour when his gaze landed on her, her sword and shield raised at the ready. “Where’s Techno?!” She shouted. Bad started to stand when he saw the figure behind her. His face paled and he took a step back. Technoblade’s warning came back to mind. Heed, and repent! Philza, the Angel of Death, stared down at him, hand on the hilt of his sword. His expression, cold and enraged, made Bad’s heart palpitate with fear. He took another step back, nearly stumbling over Antfrost. He risked a glance at him and urged him to stand. He was shaking as he took to his feet, looking ready to flee. A glance back at Philza told him why. The man had stepped forward, his sword now unsheathed. They couldn’t fight them, Bad knew that in the depths of his soul. Even alone, Philza stood leagues above them. Bad took another step back and Philza followed him. Bad’s breaths were coming fast, panting with his growing panic. He couldn’t die here. He couldn’t die now!

“Bad!” Puffy called. “Tell us what you did with-uh.” Her face contorted as if she was biting back her words. Philza turned his head to her, his expression softer and gentle. She stepped back, holding up a hand. “Sam?”

It was only then that Philza realized he could hear the crackling of the call. He waited patiently for her conversation to end, only half listening. Something moved out of the corner of his eye and he snapped his face back to Bad. Bad and Antfrost were backing up, though Bad was looking at Puffy with an intense expression that Philza did not recognize.

“Sam, uh, can you wait a minute? We-We’re kind of in the middle of-“ Puffy’s words trailed off as her face paled. “No…” she whispered, eyes drifting towards the prison.

“Puffy?” Philza started. More movement from Bad had him looking back at him. Bad had a feral look in his eyes, trident in hand.

“Don’t follow us!” He hissed before he and Antfrost flew away with the tridents. Philza growled, his wings spreading so he could gain speed and follow them.

“Phil, wait,” Puffy said, holding her hand out.

“They might have taken Techno somewhere, Puffy! We can’t just keep stalling like this!”

“No, Phil. Sam, he,” she paused, licking her lips as she hesitated.

“What is it?”

“It’s Dream. He’s gone.”

Philza felt the lightning before it came, felt the crack of thunder long before he heard it. Even that was silent compared to Puffy’s reveal.

“He… What?”

“Sam didn’t find him in his cell. The prison was in total lockdown so he could come help us and he still got out!”

Philza squeezed his hand around the hilt of his sword, indecision taking root again. If Dream was gone… Why now? Why now?! And where was Technoblade? He had been with Bad, but they just found Bad and he wasn’t here! Where???

“Phil?”

Philza closed his eyes and swallowed his hesitation. He straightened and leveled his gaze with Puffy. “Go see if you can help Sam. I’ll go find Bad. I’ll go find Techno.”

“Are you sure? What if they try to take you too?”

"I'd like to see them try," Philza said. His voice had dropped into a deep growl. He reached for his trident-

"Phil?" Ranboo's voice came crackling through the communicator. His voice was shaking, afraid of something, and Philza forced himself gentle before he spoke.

"Ranboo, this is a bad time. Can we talk later?"

"No, uh. You said to call you when I saw Techno?"

That caught Philza's attention. "Did you see him?"

"Well, no, I-I don't really know. But this big dark shape flew overhead and… I-I-I think I saw him. It crashed in the hills."

"Dark…" He thought of Puffy diving to the ground earlier, instinct taking over to hide. But nothing flew here, not without rain. And nothing that big. "Ranboo, get a torch ready. I'm coming back."

Philza turned on his heel, trident in hand, when a loud crack of thunder made him flinch. He eyed the sky, eyed the lightning storm above him, and put away the trident. He'd be slower, but he wasn't about to risk death here. For Techno, yes, yes, he would in a heartbeat. But he was useless to Techno right now if he was dead. Philza broke out into a sprint, weaving through buildings and vines until his feet hit wood. The wind and thunder roared in his ears in time to his heartbeat, in time with his racing footsteps. His wings flared out and caught a gust of wind. When he landed, he slipped on the stone. Pain burned through his skull from the slice in his hand and he pushed himself to his feet. Come on, he had to. He had to go! If there was a chance that Techno was safe…! If there was a chance he was okay!

Philza slid through the portal. The rain evaporated off him in an instant as he bolted down the path. He knew the nether well enough, knew this path enough to know how to use his wings to catch him, to stop him from falling. He would find Techno. He would save him. No matter what dangers he faced, he would save him. No matter what horrors his friend faced, no matter if the egg corrupted him, he would save him! He would. He would!

He would.

Philza couldn’t stand to see his friend suffer. He couldn’t stand to be part of any more suffering. If he had to, he would take Techno far away. He would take his friend far from them all. From all the pain and suffering. He would take Ranboo too. Gods above knew the kid had suffered enough. He would fix it. He would keep them safe.

He would.

He ducked into the portal and was met with air so cold it burned his lungs. He coughed, the cold already seeping in through his armor, through the remaining heat of the nether. He wrapped his wings tight around him and glanced at the sky. There was no storm here. Just the icy light of the moon. He hurried towards home, hurried towards torchlight. Ranboo was waiting outside, torch burning in hand. As Philza approached, he touched the sword at his sword to remind him it was still there.

---

Dream squeezed Techno's arm, willing his skin from netherite to flesh, willing his body less into nightmare. Techno was cold, barely breathing in the snow. He was still unconscious. Dream could smell that his throat was still raw and reeking of blood spilled wrong. Seeing his soulbleeder laid low like that sent everything inside Dream still tethered to this world asunder. He would have killed them, slaughtered them until the grass was black with their entrails. But his name, whispered in fear from the mouth of someone who still looked like his friend, dragged his head out of the sea he drowned in. It was enough that Dream picked up Techno, heavy and limp like a corpse, and flew him back. Dream flew back to the snow and cold of Techno's home, until his body gave out under the weight of his own flesh. They were still too far and Dream felt so weak. He would never make it there and back to the prison without rest. But he could not rest in the snow, not while Techno might be suffering, still under the egg's influence. No, he had to get him home.

The schling of a sword unsheathed was Dream's only warning. The blade halted just under his chin and he was forced to look up. Torchlight flickered behind Philza, the dim light barely illuminating his face. But Dream didn't need the light to see him, to see the expression. He could taste Philza's fear from here.

A soft gasp pulled Dream's attention away from the shaking sword from his throat, his gaze flicking to the one who held the torch. Ranboo thrust the torch forward to help Philza see better and Dream flinched from the light. Too used to darkness, the light burned.

"What are you doing here?" came Philza's voice, his worry cracking like jaws through a turtle shell. Dream gazed up at him, at his disgust, his anger, his terror. Dream breathed it in, willing his aching body back to life, back to movement. He turned his head towards Technoblade, and for one brief chilling moment, he thought his partner dead. A weak, shaking breath revealed the worst had not yet come to pass.

"Ranboo," Philza started, the name spoken sharply. The sword had begun to waver, but now snapped back in place at Dream's throat. "Take Techno back to the house." His gaze focused on Dream, briefly leaving the monster to hiss his order at Ranboo again. Ranboo startled and dropped the torch. A soft chirp of Ender left him as he hurried to pick up Techno. He stilled when he got close to Dream, a single step from panicking. Dream eyed him, his hand curling tight on Techno's arm, until finally releasing him. Ranboo dragged him onto his shoulders and hurried away from the two, leaving them in flickering darkness.

"Dream," Philza said, pressing the blade closer to his throat. Dream lifted up his gaze, his inhuman eyes blinking at the man. Philza had never seen the man without his mask on. To his knowledge, none of them had. Seeing his face now, after everything he had done…

He could now see him for the monster he really was.

"Why are you here?" Phil asked again, struggling to keep calm.

“They were going to kill him, Phil.” The sentence should have been an explosion of sound, a scream, a snarl, a roar! But it came out of Dream like a whimper, bitter anger and helplessness. It was a mirror of the helplessness Phil felt when he realized his old friend was in danger and the terror of not getting to him fast enough. It was a kinship, he felt suddenly. Phil set his jaw firm and hardened himself against that thought. He did not want to feel kinship with the monster before him. Dream continued, his head hanging away from the sword.

“I… I don’t know how long he was down there, but,” he bit his lip. Phil could see glimpses of the emotions racing across his face and he was struck by how open Dream was. His voice, even, held open desperation. “Phil. I could hear him screaming.” Phil went cold, so cold he swore his heart stuttered to a stop. The implications flooded his mind until it was all he could see. Techno trapped above the egg, its voice the loudest thing in his head. He wouldn’t have been able to mine out of the obsidian. They had found his gear locked in a chest. Techno’s hands had been bloody, hadn’t they? It was hard to see in the dark, but… Had he tried to claw his way out? They assumed three days, but how long had he really been there? How long had he suffered alone?

“So, I brought him home. To you.” The way he addressed Phil was full of venom, but also… It sounded like a concession, an admittance that he never wanted to speak into existence. What? That Philza was better equipped to take care of Technoblade? There was also a hint of…

“Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t run you through on my blade,” Phil said, guiding both his thoughts and Dream’s head back to the matter at hand.

“Because if I die, then death is permanent?”

“A different one,” Phil hissed. Dream contemplated him, like he didn’t have a sword inches from his throat. The torchlight died, plunging them into darkness. As Phil’s eyes adjusted to the cold moonlight, Dream’s voice came, whispered like a corpse’s dying breath.

“Because I don’t know if Techno’s going to survive the night.”

“Is that a threat?” Phil asked. His voice did not waver, but he felt his fear settle in again. If he killed Dream here and Techno died before he could get back… But if he ran now, it meant letting Dream roam free. Phil couldn’t live with himself if he was the cause for more suffering. His indecision trapped him. His sword twisted in his hands and he focused on Dream again. Dream’s jaws opened, teeth reflecting the moonlight as he dragged himself to his feet. His hand braced around the edge of the sword and he leveled his gaze with Phil’s.

“What do I gain by threatening you here, Phil?!” Dream yanked the sword back to his throat. Phil expected to see more snarls, more teeth, more threats. What he saw instead froze him in his tracks. Dream’s eyes, wild and poison green, were tear filled and feral in his desperation.

“Why do you care!” He shouted back. He ripped the sword out of Dream’s hand, his wings flaring behind him. “Techno hates you! Why would you save him?”

Dream’s eyes widened. He stumbled back, dark blood dripping onto the snow as realization cracked across his face. “He never told you,” he said softly, as if to himself. Before Phil could respond, Dream stepped forward and continued with a voice as hard as bedrock. “Techno is the last thing tethering me to this world.” Phil blinked. He took in Dream’s expression, the unshakeable truth to his words. But…

“What about Tommy?”

“Tommy?” Disbelief danced across Dream’s face. A sick laugh bubbled out of him. Dream hugged himself as he laughed even harder. “Tommy?!” Once his laughter subsided, Dream grinned wildly at Phil. “Tommy is just a toy to be used and played with.” His grin faded and he hugged himself tighter. “Techno is different.”

“Different?” Phil shook his head and sighed. He couldn’t deal with this. He didn’t understand what Dream meant and the longer he stayed out here, the longer Technoblade was left without help. Ranboo didn’t know how to take care of a body, to heal and make it whole again. Technoblade could be dying and Phil wasn’t by his side. He had to make a decision and he had to make it now. “So, what even is your plan here? Save Technoblade and you think that makes up for everything you did? Do you think you can just roam free now?”

“No, I—“

"Then what?" Phil asked, hilt of the blade humming familiar violence under his fingers. Just one stroke.

"I’ll head back," Dream said, caught by a shiver wracking his body. He lifted his hands up in a staying gesture. "Just as soon as I can. I mean, hey," he shot Phil an exhausted smile, something that should have been cavalier, would have been, if Dream was acting like he normally did. "It was made for me, after all. May as well."

“It… what?”

Something lit up in Dream’s eyes and he tilted his head. “The prison. Was designed to hold me. Of course, I belong there.”

Philza didn’t want to think about the implications of that. It was cold, the moon drifting higher in the sky, and he was exhausted. He didn’t want to give up this easily though. He gripped his sword and opened his mouth to say something at Dream.

“You know what?” Dream started, taking a step back. “How about this: you let me go back, alone, and I’ll owe you a favor. Anything you want. Anything at all.” Philza eyed him for a long moment. Then, with a soft sigh, he sheathed his sword and took a step back. Dream smiled and gave him a nod; their deal agreed upon. His body cracked as his wings opened again and he started to turn away from Phil.

“Dream,” Phil called, a hand outstretched as if to stay him. “You need to understand one thing first. If you ever hurt Technoblade, I’ll run you through on this sword myself.” Dream turned back and leveled his gaze with him.

“If I ever hurt Technoblade, I’ll let you.” Dream turned on his heel, and started to walk away. Phil started to turn away, his thoughts shifting to Technoblade in their house and how he was going to fix him, when something dropped in front of his face. The enchanted sheen of the god apple shone up at him from the snow.

---

Sam tapped his foot, his anxiety crawling around like spiders as the lava slowly crept down. Somehow, somehow, Dream had escaped. Escaped into the night and no one around knew what happened. He didn't alert many people. Just Puffy, who had called about Technoblade and the egg. She told Philza, since he had been with her. She rushed over and he gave her temporary access to help him search the prison for break ins or weaknesses. The only thing they had found were some blocks placed wrong in the ceiling. Above several stories of lava. The mining fatigue curse was still in place. There was no sign of tools, no sign of potions. The only thing different about the cell was that damn clock was broken again. And Dream's mask and some of his clothes were in the chest. Which was… strange. The last person to have visited Dream was Technoblade almost a week ago. And Sam searched him! Searched his crown even! And there was nothing! Sam was going to check the cell again, praying that he had somehow missed something to explain Dream's escape.

The lava receded into the floor and Sam looked up to the cell and froze. He blinked several times, even rubbed at his eyes to rid what must be a sleep deprived hallucination. But the scene before him didn't change.

Dream, his back pressed against the far wall, sat with his knees pulled up in front of him. The mask was back on, all his clothes on, and he looked as though he was writing in one of his journals. It was a scene that Sam had grown accustomed to seeing when he brought Dream his meals. But…

"What?!" He shouted across the expanse. Dream looked up at the noise. Seeing Sam, he waved. He got up, put away the journal, and stepped close to the edge of the cell.

"Hey, Sam," Dream called.

"Where did you go?!”

“Out.”

“How did you get out?!”

"There's a little weakness in the blocks up there that you might want to check out," Dream explained, pointing up at the ceiling. Right where Sam had found the blocks placed wrong.

"How did you get up there?!"

Dream shrugged and stepped back from the edge. "Do you think you could get me a new clock?"

Sam narrowed his eyes at Dream, stepped back, and flipped the lever to bring the lava back down.

[violetwolfraven]

Fix You

((Part 2 of Already Home! It’s written to Fix You by Coldplay! Btw it won’t really make sense unless you read Already Home first, so it might be in your best interest to read that before starting this. Enjoy, y’all!))

Tw: non-graphic injuries, the word wh*re, mentioned anti-semitism, implied period-typical homophobia, implied racism—mostly all by one guy but don’t worry they beat him up

...

“Jack?”

“What?”

Sophia looked worried, and Jack sighed, realizing she’d probably said his name multiple times already.

That happened sometimes. He spaced out and lost himself, thinking of home.

Of Crutchie, of Race, of Romeo and Elmer and Specs and Smalls and all the other newsies. Of Katherine and Sarah, Medda and Denton and Kloppman. Even of Spot and the other leaders of other boroughs, for Christ’s sake.

But especially of Davey. Mostly of Davey.

All he’d wanted was to come to Santa Fe to say goodbye to his grandfather. Instead, he’d gotten stuck here for months.

When you try your best but you don’t succeed

It was funny, wasn’t it? How he’d spent his entire childhood dreaming of Santa Fe—being obsessed with it, really, and now wanted nothing more than to get the hell out.

That was what he got for not listening to Davey. For holding on when he shouldn’t have.

Sophia was the one good thing that had come out of this. If Jack hadn’t come out west, he would never have found out he even had an aunt.

And he loved her dearly. She was the kind of good aunt that was okay with her nephew loving another boy and supportive of him wanting to leave her to go back to the city her sister had died in.

But she wasn’t home.

When you get what you want but not what you need

“Dinner’s ready,” she said, “I made your favorite.”

Jack smiled, standing up from where he was sitting on the porch, “Thanks, Aunt Sophia.”

“Well, we have to do something special for tonight, don’t we?” she asked as they went inside, “It’s your last night here.”

Jack nodded. He hoped his smile didn’t look as fake as it felt.

He’d been in Santa Fe for a year.

When you feel so tired, but you can’t sleep

It really all felt like a dream, bittersweet and terrible, heartbreaking and lovely. It felt like coming home, to where his roots were, and simultaneously letting his highest branches, the parts that really saw the sun, die.

There was no shortage of sun or moon in Santa Fe. They just weren’t the ones Jack wanted to see.

He wanted to wake up on the rooftop of the Lodging House, where there were fewer stars, a colder sun, and a fainter moon.

After all, if he was on the roof in New York, it would mean that the brightest stars were all downstairs from him, safe in their beds in the forms of a unique, strange family of boys and girls. It would mean the sun was sleeping across from him, his smile below the horizon for the night. It would mean that the moon was either just across the borough, shining over his own brother and sister, or curled up safe in Jack’s arms, his light burning away even the worst of his nightmares.

He hoped they were all still there when he got home.

“I’m going to miss you, Jack,” Sophia admitted.

“I’m going to miss you, too.”

It wasn’t a lie. But Jack’s place was in Manhattan and Sophia’s was in Santa Fe. He didn’t know if he would ever see her again after tomorrow, but he had to believe that she would be alright here by herself.

“Tell that boy of yours ‘hello’ for me,” she said with a smile, “And your mama’s friend, Medda, tell her ‘thank you.’ For being there for Anita when I couldn’t be.”

“I will,” Jack promised.

Stuck in reverse

He would miss his Aunt Sophia, but knowing that he would be going home tomorrow morning, Jack was happy. He felt like he was finally waking up.

He guessed it wasn’t surprising that he couldn’t sleep that night.

Jack was excited to be going home, yes. He was going to miss Sophia, so that was bittersweet. But what he was really worried about was...

What he was really worried about was if his home was going to be there when he got back.

Jack choked on a sob, trying to keep quiet as his thoughts ran rampant.

When the tears come streaming down your face

What if somebody had died over the winter? They’d lost kids to sickness or starvation or cold before. Hell, they’d lost Jack’s mentor—the previous leader of Manhattan—that way.

Jack remembered that terrible day, sobbing so hard that he could barely hear Waffles’s goodbye. He was 14. They’d lost more than a few kids that year, and a good half of them had been under Jack’s watch. Since then, he’d lost a few more across two more winters, and it never got easier.

The only thing worse than watching someone he loved die would be them dying, and Jack not even knowing. Jack not being there for them.

When you lose something you can’t replace

He’d lost a year in Santa Fe. Besides just the fact that he had no idea what terrible things might have happened while he was gone, he had to have missed a lot of little things.

He wondered how much Smalls, Romeo, and the other younger ones had grown. He wondered if Puddles, the latest Little when he left, had started losing baby teeth yet. He wondered if Kath and Sarah had finally sucked it the hell up and admitted their feelings.

Oh, God, and Specs was only a little younger than Jack was. They were the oldests, and they were getting a bit old to be newsies. What if one of Jack’s oldest friends had moved on and he wasn’t there to see it?

Most of all, he was terrified to know, but he wondered if Davey was still waiting for him.

A year was a long time. He wouldn’t blame him for moving on if he had. After a year of nothing, what if Davey had assumed he was dead or never coming home and found someone else?

He’d come to Santa Fe out of love for his mother, because it was something she’d never gotten to do.

And he might have lost everyone he loved because of it.

When you love someone but it goes to waste

He hoped they’d held up alright without him. He just knew Davey would be too dumb to stay away if sickness came through. He would be right in the thick of it.

Sickness could kill you whether you had parents or not.

God, Jack was going to have a panic attack, just thinking about the possibilities of what might be happening without him.

Could it be worse?

He really hoped they were all okay.

...

Lights will guide you home

Jack hugged Sophia on the train platform, the feeling bittersweet but happy.

“I love you, Auntie.”

“I love you, too, Jack,” she responded, “Remember...”

“I’ll tell my friends you said hello,” he agreed, “Davey, too.”

“And Medda,” she reminded him.

“Yeah.”

“Tell her hello and thank you for me.”

The train whistle blew. Jack startled, knowing he had to go now.

“Go,” Sophia said quickly, “I love you. Go home to your family, Jack.”

Jack hugged her one last time, kissing his aunt on the cheek real quick, “Love you, too.”

With that, he ran off, lightning thrumming through his veins.

He was excited and terrified as he boarded that train, but the important thing was that he was going home.

And ignite your bones

The entire train ride was spent trying not to panic.

With nothing to do but think, Jack could just try to redirect his fears to more positive thoughts.

And I will try

Albert hadn’t finally antagonized the wrong person. Even if he had, the others had protected him.

Sniper’s father hadn’t killed her. Maybe she’d finally moved into the Lodging House for good.

Mush and Blink hadn’t gotten caught. They’d probably been warned by Davey and Race and Crutchie to be more careful in public.

Race hadn’t gotten his heart broken by Spot. In fact, Spot had probably saved his ass from at least one fight he couldn’t handle.

Crutchie hadn’t gotten sick too bad this winter. He’d stayed strong, and the others had helped him pull through.

Davey hadn’t moved on.

As much as Jack hated the idea of him hurting, he knew that Davey Jacobs was the last person he was ever going to love, and he was pretty sure that Davey felt the same.

Everyone he loved was still waiting for him in New York.

They probably missed him, but he could pick up the pieces when he got home.

To fix you

Hopefully.

...

And high up above or down below

“So, you’re sure we can’t avoid it?”

Race nodded grimly, “I ain’t one to rumble if we don’t have to, but Midtown’s been pushin’ since Hound aged out. If we don’t let ‘em know we won’t stand for it, they’ll move on our territory.”

Davey sighed. He’d liked Hound. He was a good kid, and now he was a good man. Under him, Manhattan and Midtown had been allies for years, but the new leader, Trumpet, wasn’t like him. And Davey knew that they couldn’t afford to lose territory on his watch.

Being acting leader of Manhattan was exhausting. He’d learned that the hard way over the last... a little over a year, now.

He’d been leading mainly by asking himself what Jack would do. He didn’t always do whatever that was, but now... he didn’t know what to do, here, truthfully.

When you’re too in love to let it go

He still asked himself what Jack would do.

“Dave, I don’t like it either,” Crutchie said from where he was sitting on the other side of the room, “But Trumpet ain’t gonna stop ‘less we make him. And besides, that ain’t even takin’ into account how he’s morally askin’ for it.”

“I get that you don’t like him,” Davey reasoned, “I don’t like him, either, but I’m still looking for a peaceful way to—“

“No, Davey,” Race interrupted, “Ya don’t know what he’s been sayin’. What I’s heard him say ‘bout you.”

“Why? What’s he been sayin’?” Davey asked, immediately on-guard. He didn’t like the idea of that certain newsie knowing certain things about him. And he definitely didn’t like the idea of him possibly knowing things about damn near all the Manhattan kids over the age of 14 by extension.

“Don’t worry,” Race said absentmindedly, “He don’t know nothin’ ‘bout queer stuff. But it’s damn near as bad. He deserves to get soaked on what he said ‘bout Kath alone, and—“

“Race, slow down,” Davey said, getting in front of him to stop his pacing, “What’s he been sayin’? Start with Kath.”

“He-he said...” Race growled under his breath, looking at the ground.

It must be bad if Race couldn’t say it.

Crutchie sighed, “He called Kath a whore.”

Davey felt anger flash through him, red hot, “Oh.”

“He used a lot of unsavory names,” Race growled, “Comments I ain’t gonna repeat ‘bout Mush and Specs for bein’ black, Sniper and Romeo for bein’ Asian, Crutchie for needin’ the crutch—he’s gotta go down.”

“He said things ‘bout me being Jewish, didn’t he?” Davey asked slowly.

Crutchie nodded, “About Sarah and Les, too, but mostly ‘bout you.”

Davey didn’t like the idea of a full-fledged rumble, but the way he was feeling right now, he wanted to pound Trumpet into the ground.

But if you never try, you never know

“I’d rumble just for what he said about Kath,” he said truthfully, “Go meet with Midtown’s second—pick a time and place.”

Race grinned and ran out the door.

Crutchie sighed, “He didn’t say it, but Trumpet said things ‘bout him, too, for bein’ Italian. He made a few comments ‘bout the others, but most of it was ‘bout you, me, and him.”

“Cause we’s the leaders,” Davey muttered.

He wondered if Jack had had to deal with this shit.

He probably had, though his Mexican heritage wasn’t immediately obvious in his face.

Davey knew he wasn’t as much of a fighter as his lover was. He didn’t know if he could lead Manhattan to win this rumble, but he had to try.

Just what you’re worth

“Come on,” he told Crutchie, “We need to get the others ready.”

They hadn’t talked about Jack in months, but he knew they were both thinking about him as they went to get Manhattan’s kids ready for battle.

...

Lights will guide you home

Davey stared across the road, the fading daylight of sunset over the two groups of newsies.

He didn’t know if he could be as strong as Jack would be, but he knew he would fight as hard as he damn could to defend the other Manhattan kids.

His kids. His and Jack’s, even if Jack wasn’t here right now.

He was realizing now, standing in front of them, preparing to defend their territory, that they were his family, as much as Sarah and Les and his parents were.

He was sure as hell going to fight for his family.

“If Manhattan wins, stay the hell off our turf!” he called to Trumpet, “If Midtown wins, you can have some of the territory you want!”

Trumpet laughed, “Yeah, whatever!”

Then he yelled something that made Davey see red, and before he knew it, he was feeling his knuckles bruise as his fist connected with Trumpet’s stupid nose.

And ignite your bones

He heard a crack, and the kid was on the ground, but Davey didn’t have time to feel good about that because he was already fending off another, taking a punch in the jaw as he fought.

He hadn’t felt so alive since the strike, the adrenaline of the battle toxic and exhilarating.

He wished he could enjoy it more.

But he kept looking for hazel eyes and a sarcastic smile, checking where one person was in all this, hoping to see that he was alright.

That one person wasn’t, because he wasn’t there.

And I will try

Davey forced himself to think of something else, to focus just on fighting instead.

He had to take care of Manhattan. His chosen family, and he couldn’t do that if he wasn’t in one piece, too.

To fix you

“It’s over,” Davey spat as the rumble ended, Manhattan having kicked Midtown’s ass.

Trumpet, on the ground, looked angry but picked himself up, calling to his kids and limping back towards his borough.

They were still kids, and normally, Davey would feel bad that he’d assisted in soaking them, but tonight, he couldn’t afford to care. He needed to get his own kids home.

“Alright!” he called, spotting one of his seconds and a few others who weren’t hurt too bad, “Specs, I need a headcount! Race, on the way home, I need ya to catalogue everybody’s injuries! Smalls, go run ahead and tell Crutchie to get a lot of first aid equipment ready! Let’s go, Manhattan! We’re going home!”

...

Tears stream

Jack was waiting by the door when the train stopped, practically bouncing around as it slowed down.

He hadn’t slept or ate the whole train ride.

Another passenger by the door smiled at him, “Excited, huh?”

“Oh, yeah,” Jack said immediately, “I’s been away a long time, but New York’ll always be my home.”

The guy looked surprised, and Jack realized that a year in New Mexico had made the slight Spanish accent he’d already been hiding stronger. He spoke like his Aunt Sophia now.

Like his mom.

As comforting as the familiarity of it was, a foreign accent wasn’t really a good thing for a newsie. Jack would have to get back into his thick New York accent, and fast.

He cleared his throat and managed to sound a bit more like his old self, “It’s good to be back.”

The other passenger nodded, still kind of baffled, and Jack jumped off the train before it was even fully stopped.

Down your face

He took a second to just breathe on the platform.

Jack hadn’t fully realized that New York had a smell before, but he was realizing it now, getting reaquainted with it.

He was happy to be home.

It was late enough that no newsies were out selling, and Jack adjusted his bag on his shoulder as he started walking, one step at a time, towards the Lodging House. He had to force himself not to run, because nothing looked more suspicious than a young man sprinting and Jack really didn’t want to waste time dealing with the bulls tonight.

A year was a long time, and Jack knew he could never get that time back, but he had to believe that nothing had changed too much.

When you lose something you cannot replace

Then he was standing in front of the Duane Street Lodging House and suddenly, he couldn’t breathe.

Taking a deep breath as he walked in the door, he was surprised to see one of the few adults he trusted still up at the front desk, writing something in one of his books.

Kloppman dropped his pencil out of shock when he looked up.

“Jack?”

“Hey, Kloppman,” Jack said awkwardly. He was staying quiet, knowing the others were all probably asleep upstairs with only a few possible exceptions.

The old man moved around the desk to wrap him in a tight hug, and Jack realized that he’d been so worried about missing his kids that he’d barely thought to miss Kloppman, but he definitely knew how much he’d missed him, now.

“It’s good to see ya, kid,” he said, pulling back to thump Jack on the shoulder, “Everyone’s missed ya.”

“And they’s okay?” Jack asked, “They all—“

“You worry too much for someone your age,” Kloppman interrupted, grumbling, “They’s fine. They’s all fine. There’s a few new Littles ya ain’t met, but we didn’t lose nobody. Even Specs ain’t found anywhere to move out to yet.”

Jack breathed a sigh of relief, “Good. Winter don’t get cold in Santa Fe and I was pretty worried—“

“Are you cryin, kid?”

Tears stream

Jack shook his head, “No!”

He wasn’t. He was not crying because the fact that it was so good to be home wasn’t enough to make someone as strong as Jack Kelly cry.

“Jack?”

If Jack wasn’t crying before, he definitely was when Crutchie nearly tackled him to the ground with a bone-crushing hug.

Down your face and I...

“You’s...” Crutchie stared at his face as he pulled back, like he couldn’t believe Jack was actually there, “You’s here? Ya came home?”

Jack nodded, smiling through his tears, “I’m home.”

He decided to ignore the fact that tears were soaking into the shoulder of his shirt as Crutchie hugged him again.

Kloppman smiled at Jack over his brother’s shoulder, patted them both on the back, and went back to his work.

“So, how is everyone?” Jack asked, wiping his eyes on his sleeve, “‘Sides how nobody’s dead.”

Tears stream

He couldn’t bring himself to ask directly about Davey. Not in front of Kloppman, at least. And he did want to know how the others were, too.

“We almost lost a few to the flu, but we didn’t,” Crutchie reported, “‘Course, right now, everybody’s a bit banged up ‘cause we had a rumble with Midtown, but—“

“We rumbled with Midtown?” Jack asked, shocked, “But Hound’s an ally!”

“Hound retired. Trumpet became leader and y’know what an ass he is.”

“Right,” Jack said.

Truth be told, he didn’t remember Trumpet. But if he was enough of an ass that he’d provoked a rumble between two long-standing allies, he must be bad.

“Who won?”

“We did,” Crutchie reported, “Davey lead us to victory.”

Down your face

It was like the air had gotten sucked out of the room. Jack couldn’t respond.

“He’s been leadin’ since ya left,” Kloppman said, like it was simple, “I had my doubts ‘bout him, what with how he started the strike, but he really stepped up, that boy of yours.”

Jack’s mind zeroed in on the tail end of that, “What do ya mean by ‘that boy of—“

“I’m old, kid, not blind. If I could figure out Race was seein’ that short kid from Brooklyn, I could figure out you. Long as you’s happy and don’t get caught, it don’t matter to me.”

Jack really should have expected that Kloppman would know.

He was still frozen. He didn’t know what to do.

Crutchie put a comforting hand on his shoulder, “He’s been stayin’ here most nights, takin’ care of everyone. Les stays over some, too, but... well, we planned the rumble tonight, so not tonight.”

“And...” Jack cleared his throat, “And Davey?”

“Ya ain’t gonna run off and leave him again, are ya?” Kloppman asked.

That question stunned Jack to silence, though he wasn’t sure if it was from offense, guilt, or shock.

I promise you

Crutchie sighed, “He took it pretty hard, Jack. He ain’t been the same since we got that letter.”

As much as that information hurt and made it hard to think, Jack knew his answer.

“I’m stayin’ right here in New York,” he said firmly, “I came back ‘cause I missed all of ya so much it hurt, but Davey most of all. I kept workin’ even when it seemed like I’d never make enough because I love him and I am never leavin’ again.”

Crutchie squeezed his shoulder, smiling.

“He’s up in the washroom. If you’s quiet, ya won’t wake anyone.”

I will learn from my mistakes

Jack tried to climb the stairs silently, only sneaking one peek into the bunk room to confirm that, yes, all the others were there.

Tears stream

They were safe. Seeing that for himself meant more than hearing it from Kloppman and Crutchie.

The washroom was empty except for one boy, standing at the sink with his back to the door.

He was washing out old bandages, the slump in his shoulders the only thing that betrayed the exhaustion which no one who didn’t know him as well as Jack did would recognize.

“I told ya, Kloppman, I don’t need help,” he called quietly over his shoulder, without looking back, “I can manage this by myself.”

Down your face and I...

Jack took a deep breath, “Don’t mean ya have to.”

Davey dropped the bandage he was holding, seeming frozen to the spot.

He took a couple seconds before he turned around, his shocked eyes instantly landing on Jack’s.

God, Jack had missed those eyes.

Lights will guide you home

“...Jack.”

“Davey.”

Jack crossed the room, but stopped a few feet short of his lover.

He didn’t know if this was still okay. He had been gone for a year.

“Is this...” Davey took a shaky breath, and Jack realized that he looked like he was going to cry, “Is this real?”

“It’s real,” Jack promised, “I’m home.”

Davey gasped as he reached out to touch Jack’s arm, like he hadn’t expected it to be true.

He looked terrible. He had bruises all over his hands and face, and Jack was sure there would be more under his shirt. And besides that, the dark circles under his eyes said quite clearly that he hadn’t slept in a while.

“Dave,” Jack whispered, reaching up to touch the shiner he must have gotten in that rumble Crutchie mentioned.

“I’m fine, Jack,” Davey said, grabbing his hand and tugging him closer, “You should see the other guy.”

They weren’t quite hugging, but Jack’s chuckle still shook both of them, “I ain’t worried ‘bout the other guy. I’m worried ‘bout you.”

And ignite your bones

He sighed, “I don’t know how you did it, all these years by yourself. I’ve been barely keeping everyone alive for just one.”

“You did,” Jack reminded him, wiping a tear off the other boy’s face, “You did. You kept my family alive, Davey. Thank you.”

Davey rolled his eyes, “Our family, Jackie.”

“Our family.”

Jack didn’t really know what there was left to say. What could possibly convey how much it had hurt to be away, how much of a relief it was to be here along the skyline of New York again, the stars safely in the next room and the sun downstairs.

And the moon right there in his arms.

“I missed you,” Jack whispered, “I’m never leavin’ ya again.”

Davey studied his face, then sighed deeply as he leaned their foreheads together, “You’d better not.”

Then they were kissing as if the last year hadn’t happened.

Jack knew that it had, and they would have a lot to talk about, preferably in the morning.

But for now, everything was fine. Jack was home.

And I will try... to fix you

[bilgisticallykosher]

Selfishness vs. Selfishness Redux

Pre-episode thoughts. I don't think they're going to address the dark side Everybody-already-knew-that thing right away. I'm still thinking Deceit's gonna be Virgil, but I'm also not so certain that's going to wind up going down. Because there's a lot of other stuff to get into. We know from the first Asides that stuff between Virgil and Patton is growing, and simmering. It's coming, and while that's in the future, there's probably going to be more build-up here. Is it that Patton knew about Virgil's past? Is it something else entirely? This is going to be a two hour episode, geez. 

Also, I can't believe he's actually going to the wedding. Idk. All those people saying he got the date wrong, though? First of all, Logan is in charge of the schedule, he'd never let that happen, how dare? And also, I always double check dates and invitations for stuff. I really doubt Virgil wouldn't have looked at the invitation and checked the information again. Watch me be totally wrong now. 

I don't know who I think the cloaked figure is. Could be Deceit ("like a freaking Scooby Doo villain"), could be Thomas himself. Probably not Organization XIII, but I'm not completely eliminating the option, let me have this. 

Things I'd like, but am 99% certain won't happen; Deceit's name (which I'm both hoping and expecting to not start with D), a new side, Remus and Deceit interacting on camera, or really Remus at all. Except for that green score of BOOBS, I maintain that's Remus's contribution. 

ALRIGHT, LET'S GO, I'M NOT READY!!!!

First impression of the thumbnail. You vs. Yourself???? Oh my gosh. Ohhhh, I'm freaking out. Patton looks so apprehensive, and I don't know if that's on general, or because of Roman or in response to Roman, because Roman looks so annoyed at Patton! He's so angry oh my gosh. I mentioned I wasn't ready, right? Okay. Okay. So their sprites are different styles, which is cool. Patton's looks risk-based stroll around town type of RPG, Roman's looks fighting style. 

The options for the character select???? Oh my gosh, that's. Hi, Remus. Anyway, uh, I don't know what this means, but there's three character options on top and- DARK SIDES ARE SEPARATE FROM LIGHT SIDES! Oh gosh, I was thinking maybe it was something to do with specifically Logan. Ooh, Deceit's in his lawyer outfit, nice touch.  THERE'S AN EXTRA BLANK PLAYER OPTION. I don't know if that means he'll be revealed this episode, or just that he exists. I mean, we just had Deceit's logo, Remus's reveal and name reveal… here goes.

IT STARTS WITH THE VIDEO GAME??? THIS IS THE INTRO????? THE WEDDING??????!!!!!!! Oh hey word crush. Oh hey, it's the couple! Starting to think this is a dream or fantasy, btw. Also, Lee and Mary Lee sound like...Esteban and Valerie? Maybe? Idk. Omg, Life is pain. 

This is awkward, beautiful. Pfft, hence the marriage. Photographer is great, no idea who he or the emcee are. Ooh. Crushed. 

INTRO??? EXCUSE ME??? Oh was SvS originally on 3/31? Yeah, good, play a review like all of us haven't been obsessing over what happened last time. "APRIL 13" I'm just going thi pause forever now. Oh this is going to be the angry walk in that was previewed in the bloopers, I can tell. Oh no. OH NO! And it is at night and he seriously freaking actually went to the wedding????

Oh my gosh he's so angry. Ohhh, Patton rethinking his phrasing, nice. You should never→I'm surprised that you etc. Oh Roman! Oh, maybe we should… not review. Oh boy. 

Oh there's Patton's avatar. In then guitar hero thing. Oh, Thomas is associated with the color white, confirmed??? I like how they did the notes there. So much detail. The talk sprites are great, but the expressions on the dancing sprites are worth paying attention to. Okay, Patton's still very, um, defensive, I guess is the word? Thomas is angry and bereft and confused and full of doubt, and Roman's heavily on the confused side (ha) about him aligning with Deceit. This is why he stole his hat. Great animation work, everyone, that was fantastic, artists! 

"Why didn't I just talk to them before the wedding?" THOMAS. Also, because Deceit specifically prevented Logan from being too close to the courtroom scene by benching him and not asking him what his idea of a compromise was. "I brought that up," well, you did, but Deceit kinda made it seem like you were suggesting lying to them, so you got shut down. Sorry, Ro. Listen, I love Deceit, but the boy's a manipulator. 

We learn to predict the future!!! Roman, no. Woah, Patton's just being completely dismissive. I mean he's been through some hard times the last few episodes, minus LNTAO, but damn. Oh. Roman's very much defending Patton. This forebodes very badly. This is going to explode terribly. Oh no. 

Okay, so, the thing with the feral cats. Is Roman okay? Did someone do this to him? More importantly, did he do this to me? Also, on a serious note, I'm super shocked Deceit hasn't come in yet, because he (and Thomas, and arguably Patton) is obviously regretting going to the wedding. I mean, Virgil's not coming in right away because of the reveal at the end of DWIT, but- hey where's Logan?! Logan and Deceit should both totally be here! *gasp* Except in the one on one episodes (Heart vs. Mind, My Negative Thinking, Logince; the argument) it's always primarily been the two sides that are featured with the others either not there or off-screen or making small cameos. But Deceit was and is an important part of this decision past, present, and going forward! 

Oooh, I like the Lee and Mary Lee backstory. Hm. Patton does bring good points, but. I still agree with- oh, Thomas just solidly saying no made me snort. Okay, so speaking of the coin bleeping, why the video games? I know there's more to come with it, how do they come into play? Oh okay metaphor. 

That was clearly not the good ending, Roman. Bringing up Is Thomas A Good Person again. OOH xylophone, is he a-comin'? Oh he's directly blaming Patton. Wow, Roman. 

A BAGEL?! Oh, game sssssssstore. Really? Frogger, Pat? 16 graphics. Oh there's the hotdogs. OH and there's the cloaked guy! Smashing our theories. That does not seem like Sondheim. 

The puns, oh my gosh, brilliant. Getting to the meat of them here. Gosh these graphics are fantastic. 6AM dull. 

Oh. Hm. Technically, he does not have to give him the 'dog. The building tension is fascinating. 

HI, LOGAN! Patton looking real uncomfortable at "regret." I mean, they all know they regret it now, right? Roman making fun of behoove, that's so funny, I have no idea why. Seriously, whoever's doing the art, I'm dying at Logan's expressions. Woah good thing viewers have the pause button. I'm all for not buying X-mas decorations. I'm doing my part, goyim. 

I'm counting "it's not like Kingdom Hearts" in lieu of that having been Organization XIII. Oh boy, Patton. Right thing vs. Feeling good vs. Feeling good about doing the right thing. This is falling apart. Patton's noise. 

BOOBS omg Deceit is Bowser. I love that painting in the background! Scutes! Time went from limited to being lost to poorly spent to wasted! I'm standing by the purple being Virgil. Fyi, in Judaism, doing a good thing for the wrong reasons doesn't matter, because you're still doing the good thing, even if it's just for the reward. There's a thing about it with Avraham and a King.

Roman's getting close to breaking. Reptilian rapscallian guy. And who's to say he can't be doing it for the reward and to help people? 

"... an individual's happiness and the amount of selfless acts…" that should be number, not amount, Logan! Can't judge good deeds only by how good you feel when you do them. 

Okay, here we go. How do we know what's Right? Killing and stealing is illegal everywhere, yes, Thomas, what are you doing, Thomas???

Oh my gosh, not the trolley problem. They're referring to Deceit as Denial and Roman as Passion! Oh gosh, that looks like Joan, Talyn, Dot, Valerie, and Terrence, and Leo by himself, maybe? Oh geez, I jolted. Logan index carding for trolley problem. 

Unus Annus is right, the trolley problem is stupid. Oh my gosh, Logan's giant wall of text physically pushing Patton back, I spit all over my screen. Skip All. 

Roman's… blaming himself? Oh!!! Are we getting Roman's insecure arc???!!! This is a complex issue, and Patton's having a hard time backing down, and everyone's feeling bad.

Scared?! I hear music! NO. Why is he scared, oh my gosh?????? That's not a tired metaphor. Oh! I've heard of hypoxia! It was hypothesized (and disproven) to be the reason for a specific Bermuda Triangle incident. 

Good point, Logan. Regarding theory and in the moment instincts. Remus mention with intrusive thoughts! Shocked that Logan is arguing for leisure time. Logan's self satisfied smirk at the self-sacrifice. GLITCHY! Oh he's a frog. Lilypadton. 

Oh my gosh I'm getting so stressed. Yes, thank you, Logan for the scream. I… don't. The conscientious comment. No, it's not. This seems… Deceit-y. IT IS! SHARP SIDE OH MY GOSH! Oh, he didn't rise up, he popped out in the freaking dialogue box, NO, FRICK IT WAS RIGHT THERE! And the Nietzsche and the specific examples that he used!!! I'm so angry! I DIDN'T THINK HE'D TAKE LOGAN'S PLACE AGAIN! I MISSED THE SIGNS! 

Hey guys, look, it's Deceit. Bull… frog. Lord of the lies. Oh! 8-bit Deceit theme. Okay, the first thing Deceit said about him not doing it on purpose was nice, but yeah, those words striking him is accurate. Yeesh, harsh. 

Is Patton eating his own words? Oh, uh, is anyone going to acknowledge he hit Thomas? Is that telling of the situation instead of just being a funny background event? 

The crick in Thomas's neck is so funny. SNAKES ON THE PLANE!!! ...Hm. Happy that he brought that up. Oh my gosh, Deceit's spluttering, he's like so bad at things sometimes, I love it. 

Logan! No, don’t do that, everybody appreciates you! Double curse? Pffffft, Logan. Deceit…definitely smiling at Logan's logic. Deceit is interesting here. Oh wow, yikes. He's really fascinating here. Legitimately complimentary? Oh, no, kind of not, maybe. Roman looks distressed.

"...Trees?" Roman's super pumped up. Good for him! Ha, his imitation. Deceit looking confused? Patton looking all sorts of things, I really think that Deceit is being genuine here- NAME?! I'D THIS HAPPENING? Why is he stripping? His, no, what does his glove have to do with his name? 

………. Janice? Did he say Jenus or Janice. It sounded like Janice. Deceit. No. Oh, burn, Roman. Damn, he almost got me. His name is not Janice. No. It's not. Don't even. Deceit was being so straight(ha)forward for the past couple of minutes. Awww, Roman. Insecurity addressing time? Wait, why is Deceit nodding at the hero thing? His lip is trembling, his voice is cracking and oh no! Roman just sank out.

Don't call him Janice, that's not his name. Oh he's being genuine again. Patton's talking about himself. WAIT WHAT. He had a five second cameo, omg. 

Yeah, those are the easier questions. No, Deceit, bad Deceit. Man, his facial expressions in this episode. Fractionally fiendish fibber. Oh, I like the reasons for Deceit being a part of him! That's… cute? Oddly cute, maybe. So, freaking how far in the future is the Asides? 

Stop calling him Janice, that's not his name. Oh, Deceit and Thomas bonding. That snort, oh my gosh. Oh, serious Deceit again! That reaction to "you're right" is oddly similar to that fake laugh at the end of Embarrassing Phases. 

………. Virgil's not here yet. His reveal isn't being addressed. Accepting Deceit. That's why he's so pissed at Patton in Asides. The next episode proper they're going to reveal that Deceit's accepted, more or less, and Patton was a big part of that, hugely changing his mind, that's why he's so pissed at him!!!

April 30th? Oh is this Lee and Mary Lee? I was wrong on the voices. Door-yelling! Hm. I mean. It's nice that they're acknowledging him, but I really don't think that sways the situation one way or another. Cute more background, and Thomas being awkward. They. This could have been instead of the wedding. Kingdom Hearts again! 

Oh hi, Patton and Deceit. He seems annoyed at the situation. Patton and Deceit bonding. Hi again, Leslie. Wild. 

This video really didn't go at all how I thought it would. Roman was barely miffed at Patton. Oh man, this was intense. I. Oh man. I need to process a lot. But I think we're on the right path, here. Janice is not his name!

Okay, I went on tumblr and two seconds in, I saw Janus, which I looked up and that makes way more sense. Another, more condensed post to follow. And several thousand reblogs.

[aislinceivun]

Hi! I know that you’ve said that you won’t continue with the sequel planned for Wandering Bird, but I was wondering if I could inquire on what you might’ve written? It’s just, I really adore your fic; can’t get it out of my head actually (so I’m so sorry if I’m being insensitive!) You mentioned once that you were going to do a POV from Arthur Gwen and Morgana- does that mean they (Morgana and Gwen specifically) had an idea of Merlin’s fate? Could Arthur “see” Merlin during his adventures? Part 1

Part 2: (Again, I apologize for my questions-your story just has so many interesting plot points!!) How would Bonnie and Co interact/react to Arthur’s return? Why couldn’t Freya interact much with Merlin; Was it a lack of magic, interference or something else? Somewhat weird question: but did you have anything in mind for Merlin’s Vigil Night? (If he can get one poor dear). (Gushing continued in third ask I’m so sorry)

Part 3: I loved how you showed Arthur considering legal reforms before his death-and the Phoenix as the emblem? *Chef’s Kiss* Was the creation of the phoenix’s later on a reference to that? Random aside: I really adored how badass you made Merlin, without making him too edgy or dark, you know? Also I really loved the many prophecies/legends surrounding just Merlin as “Emrys”! I adore literally everything about Aithusa, and her final scene made me bawl (also your art is gorgeous!) You’re amazing!

------------------------------------

Don’t ever apologize for asking questions about fics! Even if they’re old fics the author doesn’t plan on returning to, these kind of asks can really make their day and I’m sure 98% of the time they’ll just be over the moon that someone still thinks so much about their work :D I am!!

I still get emotional thinking about Aithusa, so I’m super glad her storyline made you feel so deeply. And that yuo liked Merlin’s portrayal and the lore about him! And thea art! Ahh, just, thank you! 🥰

Unfortunately, I no longer have my original outlines and the roughly 15k I’ve written due to my old laptop crashing, and it’s been 7 years (oh my gosh how) so I no longer remember the details. Which is too bad - I have several abandoned fics in my mother tongue, and I always uploaded summaries of what was supposed to happen to provide some kind of closure to readers. I can’t do that properly with Wandering, but I’ll try my best!

Putting the rest under a cut. :)

Feathers was inteded to be a series of 7 fics: 3 long main stories and 4 shorter (8-15k) standalone side-stories. The graphics are pretty much the only thing I still have  left x’D

You know this one, 75k of how Merlin spends those roughly 1500 years between the end of the show and Arthur’s rebirth. Then, the stuff that never got finished:

The Gwen POV side story, set during ch1 of Wandering. Focused on Gwen dealing with Arthur’s death, managing the kingdom and working on abolishing discrimination against magic users. Also getting together with Leon after a few years.

The Morgana POV one, at parts corresponding to ch1 and ch2 of Wandering. Honestly, I’m no longer sure about the details, but the early parts were supposed to explain and detail show canon, and then... I think I meant to bring her back in as a literal bird. With the life span of it, just keeping her consciousness, so she can watch what happens in the world. She probably watched over Aithusa, too, and Merlin, and IDK but the goal was to show her thoughts and eventually give her character justice and closure.

The Arthur POV one. He was kept in some kind of otherworldly, underwater palace-like place and could only interact with Freya, really, but he did get constant flashes of Merlin - especially where he was near Albion. This short was supposed to be very dream-like, as time works differenetly in that place. It’s kind of like when you’re half-asleep, y’know? So Arthur didn’t really live those 1500 years like Merlin did, but he followed his journey, in a way. When Freya “woke him up” at the end, they did have a conversation about it. He lost these memories when he was reborn. (But he still often dreams of water and a kind lady)

The next big one! Set in 2012, this would’ve started with Arthur & Merlin going to uni and “meeting each other” and ended with Arthur finally regaining his memories. Merlin kept away from him while Arthur was growing up, you see - aside from that one time when he learnt that by pure chance, Ray (who became a PE teacher) ended up being one of lil’ Chris/Arthur’s teachers. As old man Emrys, he got himself some history teaching shtick because he wanted to see how Arthur was doing, but he quickly realized that this is not going to work, what with him being in love with the man Arthur is going to become. xD So he left after a few months, and kept away from Arthur. (But kept pestering Ray with questions :D)

Anyway, when Arthur goes to uni (by this point, he exclusively goes by ‘Arthur’ btw, dropping Christopher) Merlin magics himself back into his eighteen year old form and gets enrolled in the same school. Agatha and Mike would have had prominent roles as basically Merlin’s sidekicks. Aggie is especially close with him, after him mentoring her about magic all her life.

Arthur has no memories either of his old life or about the years spent with Freya, so the dynamic at first is pretty much show S1. Most of the angst would have come from Arthur finally wanting to get together with Merlin but Merlin pulling away because there’s just too much Arthur doesn’t know; how is he supposed to be together with him when he’s hiding so much, lying so much? This Arthur is pure and free of the tragedies of the past, and maybe it’d be best if Merlin left him alone... But something must be happening - something the world needs Arthur for, if he slept through WWI and WWII but NOW fate decided to send him back...

Anyways, he would have gotten back his memories aroud the end of this instalment. Cue a lot of crying from Merlin’s part.

The last big one, a direct sequel to With Memories. A lot of recap and talking in the early parts, Merlin and Arthur reconciliating who they were in the past with who they are in the present and who they wanna be in the future. 

There was a Big Bad of some kind of malicious magical origin (not necessarily a person, but an “end of the world” kind of thing/entity. It was 2012 after all. Little did we knew the real shit was coming 8 years later It was revealed that Arthur had magic himself, plenty of it - he couldn’t use it, at all, but he wielded a lot of pure magic, maybe related to how he was basically marinated in magic-juice for over fifteen centuries and how his soul was pushed back into the world xD There was a lot of magical and dragon-related lore to be revealed. The Phoenixes came back to play a part in resolving the Big Bad, too. But it’s all very hazy. What I do remember is that to fix the Big Bad, Merlin AND Arthur had to hold their Vigil Night, in a way - not dying, god now, but both of them hand to give all their combined magic back to earth.  This resulted in the Big Bad no longer happening and Merlin losing his immortality =)

After figuring out their shit in the first half, they were pretty much together, btw. Learning each other in a new way. Arthur digged Merlin’s Phoenix emblem tattoo, that’s for sure. A lot of communication was needed, especially because it wasn’t easy for Arthur to understand Merlin’s grief (sometimes, Merlin looked so old despite the young form he wore; sometimes he felt ancient, and Arthur was a bit scared in his presence - not scared of Merlin, but scared of how to measure up to him, reach him, help him.) And Merlin had to understand that even with his old memories, Arthur wasn’t exactly that Arthur, the king - he had a life of his own in the present, a new identity, and it was unfair of Merlin to expect him to be the same. They no doubt talked a lot about Merlin’s lived experiences, his lost ones, Aithusa. (Merlin never stopped wearing the pendant made of Aithusa’s scale)

Happy end, of course :)

Well, that was a lot of vaaaague stuff, but hopefully gave you an idea? Bonnie wasn’t around too much, though I’m sure I’d have included some scenes with her. She probably didn’t met Arthur until Together Again. Aggie liked him fine but kept teasing him and she could be a bit harsh, what with her being so overprotective of Merlin. Mike and Arthur got along really well. Arthur was shocked when he was first fully introduced to the whole family and was met with his old PE teacher AND that brought up the fact Merlin attempted to teach him for a few months xDD 

Buuuuut.... this was still just 6, eh?

Last instalment, another side oneshot, and a prequel to the whole series. Kilgharrah’s POV. Set a few generation’s before Uther’s rein, elaborating on some of the lore and backstories revealed in Together Again. (all of which I no longer remember, rip) I know we’d have met an ancestor of both Merlin and Arthur through Kilgharrah: Aurelius Ambrosius, who does some good deed to Kilgharrah, and the dragon blesses him - after this, the man takes the name Pendragon. And Coel, who was a dragon lord, husband to Ystradwal high priestess. Coel had a cheerful and kind personality, and he was the first human Kilgharrah came to like. They became friends. Coel was supposed to be Merlin’s grandfather, I think. Kilgharrah and his mate were expecting their first egg to hatch when Uther’s purge started, and that was pretty much the end of this short =(

------------

All I have left aside from these is some tidbits of dialogue from the single file on the sequels I have:

~

“Whoa, Merlin, slow down. I can’t follow you.”

“I’m different from you. Okay? I’m not... I wasn’t... I didn’t reincarnate. I’m not a reincarnation of the original Merlin. I am the original Merlin. Do you understand? I never... Look, I never died.”

“You are. The same Merlin." Merlin nods. "The same Merlin who mucked out my horses and saved me countless times and magicked his way into my life.”

“I’m afraid, sire.”

The title comes without a conscious thought, and when he realizes, his heart twists and cracks.

Arthur just stares at him.

~

“So? Who are you guys, then?”

“I wasn’t lying about them. They are family. No! Gods, no, not like that,” he adds quickly upon seeing Arthur’s widening eyes.

“He’s our magical fairy godfather,” Mike and Aggie say in perfect union, completely straight-faced.

 ~

“The only times I was really miserable were the very first few hundred years, and later the roughly three centuries that followed Aithusa’s death. For the rest of the time, I wasn’t completely alone, and that... helped. A lot. But... it was hard. I hated how everyone I cared for withered away and died before my eyes, so I tried to keep people away for a long time. I was lonely, but that kept me safe from heartbreak. At least, that’s what I’d thought.

“But then I met Bonnie, and as I watched her grow up and start a family - a family that welcomed me - I realised how foolish I was for attempting to condone myself to a solitary life and deny myself the warmth of others’ love.”

~

Arthur wipes a hand over his face. “Owning a magical heritage but no apparent talent to use it... Just. Great. I’m a fucking Quibble!”

------------

Phew!! What a trip down memory lane xD And I actually remembered more than I thought I would, so that’s nice. Thank you for enabling me to ramble and recall some stuff a really liked about this verse. I hope I was able to give you some closure! Cheers!♥

[annakie]

An Annotated Mass Effect Playthrough, Part Four

Wherein we make it to the Citadel, and do a lot of running around.

List of Posts: 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

So right away, we meet Udina and the Council, way to throw us right into it.  

It’s a brief introduction and gives us an idea what Humanity is up against and who is representing us.  Basically, we’re supposed to get the idea that it’s a lot of bureaucratic bullshit, I guess.

This is also the first time we see Asari and Salarians, and they’re in reddish-brown and white, which really isn’t the best look.

Bioware continues to push the story forward.  We get enough to know that Udina is kind of an ass, and the Council isn’t going to just trust what some guy says even if he is the representative for billions of people.

And finally, after this, we’re set free.

The Citadel I think is one of the coolest locations in like almost any game I’ve ever played.  They do a great job of both making it feel huge, but also accessible.  Enough bridges to get across to places you need to get to, and after you walk somewhere once, Citadel Rapid Transit is great.  I still choose to take elevators about 80% of the time even when I can CRT somewhere, just because I like the squad conversations and news updates. There’s a shorter elevator rides mod that helps, too.

There’s so much to do and see, and having one of the main areas just be such an awesome combination of scifi futurism and lush greenery + water is both trippy and breathtaking.  I think, especially with the updated graphics mods/settings, the Presidium especially holds up fairly well.  I mean it definitely feels more populated and modern in ME3 but, I just consider this to be more of a residential / professional area of the Presidium and most of what we see in ME3 is a more retail section.

It’d be annoying to be a groundskeeper here, though.  Lots of green areas that you’d really need to climb to, or garden on a steep slant. :p

I always found it interesting that the natural first place to head to is into the ambassador’s office next door, where we find some friendly aliens, and one not-so-friendly one.  But honestly, this is a great place to find out the different ways other species view humanity, and how there’s apparently tiers of respect given to various species.

I always kind of hoped the Elcor would feature more prominently into the world in future games, but at least we got Hamlet.  I have SO MANY QUESTIONS about how Elcor like... do things?  We never see it but you have to assume that their hands have opposable thumbs and they’re able to stand on two legs, right?  I want to see what an Elcor ship looks like and Dakuna specifically.  Give us more elcor, Bioware!

BTW, the Mass Effect: Annihilation (aka the book that was supposed to be based on the Quarian Ark DLC that never happened in Andromeda) is totally worth reading just for the elcor character in it.  It’s also probably the best of the Mass Effect books, in my opinion.

Din Korlack’s got a point though, they not only have to share an office, but their view isn’t nearly as good as the human’s.  This is especially bullshit for the volus, who could stand on that railing and probably STILL wouldn’t have a view.

I love how Mass Effect 2 takes her from a completely forgettable character to making me think  “Sorry you’re gonna die in a few weeks, your mom’s really gonna miss you.” every time I see her.

PALIN DESERVED BETTER.

I don’t remember which ME3 mod it is, maybe the Spectre Expansion Mod or maybe EGM, but thank you whichever modder it was who made Palin’s story and death more clear in ME3.  Sorry Udina got you killed.

Also, it was good to get a dissenting opinion on Spectres from him.

Avina is such a good, optional way to get more loredump.  Yes, you can again ask them about Spectres if you want to hear about them again.  But I liked that each Avina terminal taught you a little more about whatever you were nearby, and the state of the galaxy in general and since they were programmed to be information dumps, it felt more natural to get information this way.

Don’t these people have jobs?

I love the Krogan statue, and the Avina terminal nearby telling you about it.  But now every time I see it, all I can picture is Grunt and his buddies climbing it.  So good.

Managed to get a clean shot of the crew without the UI in the elevator, thanks Flycam!  You have about a half a second to get this shot though, because the camera is stationary while the elevator is not.

Oh hell-lo Pailin, who is your charming-looking friend there?

This entire conversation needs to be longer. It’s a nice, quick introduction to Garrus, but, well, let’s spend a little more time with the main characters!!

I mean how can you not just not immediately love that?  Hey remember how bad Garrus’ face texture used to be?  Thanks, modders.

I just really love the Citadel tower.  Absolutely beautiful and atmospheric.

SO the thing is, if you can pretend that Saren isn’t, you know, already half Reaperized, 100% the Council is right to not just go throwing one of their longer-term agents in jail because Shepard had a bad dream and a random dockworker said the guy who killed Saren looked like this.

Honestly though, this and OH A GOOD CHUNK OF MASS EFFECT 2 would be so much easier if Shepard wore a bodycam. :p

Also, I wonder who took the dockworker’s testimony?  Did Kaidan run back real quick while Shepard was sleeping?

This was an embarrassment for humanity, and I agree with Udina that we needed more to go on before making demands of the council.  The council is right to not convict based off a bad dream Shepard had.  Go get some real proof!  Also, do a bunch of sidequests!

And scan some Keepers for this shady guy!

Which is actually good quest design, because you really have to go to every nook and cranny in the Citadel to find them all, though it would have been nice if they showed up on the minimap.   Really gets you to explore and get to know the area like the back of your hand.

This time around, I forgot to grab the one outside Dr. Michele’s office and had to hunt for it before heading up to grab the last one at the docks.

Thank you, though, Barla Von, for telling us all about the Shadow Broker and telling us about Wrex.  See u in ME3.

Bioware please give us diverse-suited volus in a remaster.  Maybe I’m reusing a pic of Din Korlack, you’ll never know! :p

Thanks, texture modders, for really highlighting what the end of the hanar’s noses look like. 

The hanar are another species I wish we got more of throughout the series.  They are probably the most alien of all the aliens we interact with.   I mean, at least we got Blasto.  I’d really love to visit Kahje someday.  I know it’s in the comics, but you know, in-game.

Annnd let’s go visit Sha'ira.

I have very mixed feelings about Sha'ira.  On one hand, she’s clearly very respected, is probably making bank, in control of her own destiny etc.  On the other hand, she’s probably the asari we have the second most interaction with in this game after Liara, and after just seeing Benezia’s boob-tastic clothing and then heading to Chora’s Den soon to see the dancing asari we’re getting a very slanted view of the species.  I think Bioware course corrects in later games but oof this is such a dude-fantasy alien species in ME1 it hurts.  Especially since Liara is almost a born-sexy-yesterday trope.

Also... don’t touch me if I don’t wanna be touched. =\

Noveria advertisements... that just say Noveria.  I guess this is effective marketing in 2148.

Look how great those shadows from the tree are... actual definition in shadow... wow.

Raise your hand if you’ve missed this conversation in a playthrough before and reloaded like an hour or more past to make sure you get it.

It’s one of those little moments that they didn’t have to put in.  Just a little conversation reflecting on humans and humanity, and our place in the world, and showcasing Ash’s wit and Kaidan’s adorkableness.  Also making sure you appreciate all the work that went into this particular view.  It’s a pause in the action and all the things you have going on, and it’s so great for characterization and making you feel a part of the world.  

Speaking of the view... I decided to flycam it.  Warning, I spoil some of the “magic” below.

Pretty quickly, you see that the arms are actual objects, untextured on the non-visible side.

I decided to head for the closest line of “cars” on the bottom center-left to see what those “cars” looked like.

Flycam feels pretty fast when you’re trying to frame a specific shot just right... but when you need to travel a great distance, it feels verrry slow.

It took me probably close to five minutes of traveling to make it all the way there.

What I discovered was... a few of the buildings are real, the rest are a very good painting.

This is how far away the citadel is from the rest of the map. That grid would be that entire view from outside Dr. Michele’s office all the way to the edge of the shops on the other side, plus some extra.

So both the building that those “cars” (the string of white lights) are coming from and going to are... on the painting.  Neither one are physical objects.

Made some gifs.

You can see the lights moving at a mostly-downward angle, while it looks like they’re just heading south when standing on the Citadel.  Also you can see other lights moving farther up the map.

And here you can see the lights “disappearing behind a building” but they’re really just hitting an invisible wall, the dark angle of that building is just a part of the wall painting.   

Looking up from the wall...

So that was a fun distraction.

Emily Wong deserved:

Better.

An entire shirt.

A mention in ME3 after she gave her life on social media defending Earth against the reapers while keeping her cool reporting on the invasion the day before ME3′s release.

That day before launch though... was amazing.  Bioware did such a great job on social media with the reaper invasion happening on twitter.  I loved that lots of fans got into it, too, posting photoshops and their own reaper invasion stories.  I remember being at work that day but not actually working very much.  A few friends and I had a google hangout going on to report in on anything we saw happening on social media and keep up with it and to be very hyped together online.  

We reblogged a bunch of it on fuckyeahbioware starting about here and working backwards through numbers.  

One of the ME3 mods, and again, sorry, don’t remember which, does give Emily a nice tribute through an email.  She deserves it.

Okay that’s enough for this post!  Will try to finish up the Citadel next time!

[t0ngue-tech]

Transient Boundaries

“’I really don’t.’ Yoongi sighed. ‘I don’t know why she chose me out of all people.’

You adjusted yourself and swung your arm around to drop it behind the bench. Yoongi caught a glimpse of your gaze and the pink flush that was stamped on your cheeks. It was probably the alcohol, but you had a mysterious glow about you that he couldn’t put his finger on.

‘I mean,’ you began. ‘Why wouldn’t she?’”

↠SUGGESTIVE CONTENT MY DUDES HUHU↞

word count: 5.9k

↠oneshot↞

A/N: early birthday gift for our darling, min yoongi! let’s get a bit saucy up in this bitch huhu. /wiggles eyebrows/ i haven’t made any smut content in a while, so why not do it for our next birthday boy huhu. enjoy! (btw i fckn story mapped this plot three times within the last six months LOL)

-

-

-

Being Namjoon’s friend since they were a pair of thirteen year olds has been quite the adventure, mainly because he was clumsy and quite the character. Yoongi was the opposite, so it made the years quite enjoyable.

Yoongi had the pleasure of being close with Namjoon’s family as well, this meant getting to know his younger sister of one year, you.

You and Namjoon were quite close; you adapted a lot of his personality traits. He always spoke highly of you, excluding the usual brotherly-sisterly hate once in a while. It never bothered Yoongi the way you clung onto Namjoon, he thought it was sweet because all Yoongi had was a much older brother. 

At school, you stuck with your own friends who had similar interests as you; anime and animal crossing. It’s not like you two acted like strangers. Whenever Yoongi and Namjoon walked by, you would always say hello, occasionally giving Yoongi a high five.

Yoongi always thought you were adorable in a childlike sort of way because of your round face and short stature. You also prefered having your hair cut straight, no fancy styles, and stopped right at your slim shoulders. Compared to Namjoon, you were also much quieter and a lot less rowdy.

Whenever Namjoon had a bunch of his friends come over after school, you always offered to bake cookies or bring snacks into his room. None of his friends ever minded if you sat in the room to watch them play video games because you always kept to yourself. You were pretty much everyone’s little sister.

High school was a different story.

The four years of high school were the breaking points of an adolescent’s life and it definitely took a toll on you.

Your interests never changed however, you added a few new ones; shopping, experimenting with makeup and hair colors, and obviously, boys. Namjoon would always watch on the sideline, telling Yoongi “she’s thinking of changing her hair color again” or “y/n rejected some guy from her class.” 

You grew out your hair in high school, dying it red to a deep violet to black whenever you wanted. The low rise boot cut jeans you prefered changed into high waisted skinny jeans and shorts that stopped above your mid thigh. Namjoon would complain about how you needed about an hour and a half to get ready, not to mention hogging the bathroom to blow dry your hair.

The change in your appearance also stirred the hearts and eyes of the friends who never considered you as a romantic interest from the start. Once in a while, Namjoon would get asked “does y/n have a boyfriend?” or “can I have her number?” or even “do you think y/n likes me?”

Namjoon wasn’t over protective of you; he knew you could steer your own ship, but none of the friends who were interested in you didn’t appear worthy of you in your eyes. Even with your brother’s disapproval, they still continued to ask, just in case he changed his mind.

Boyfriends came and went in your life causing you sleepless nights and heavy eyes in the morning. Namjoon always wiped your tears and offered you a listening ear. Knowing you just as long as he had known Namjoon, Yoongi also made sure to do the same for you.

While Namjoon majored in literature in college, you chose to take up graphic design in the arts department at the same university. You didn’t purposely follow in his footsteps to attend the same school as him. The program offered a lot of creative freedom and your best friend was also taking up the same major as you.

College life was as difficult as Yoongi imagined; he attended the same university as a suffering business major. Being a full-time student, joining extra-curricular activities, and having a part time job was enough to make anyone go off the rails. He lived in an apartment that was near the university and was roommates with Namjoon since their freshmen year. Now sophomores, their schedules were a tad bit more stressful. They took any window of opportunity to wind down because they spend so much time on school and work; there was nothing like a few drinks on a saturday night after a full week of hectic festivities.

“Yoomgs… it’s my life call. I have to do it.”

“And how exactly are you going to do that?”

Namjoon shoved his beer bottle a hair away from Yoongi’s nose, condensation leaving a mark. “I have to see Professor Oak and get my starter pokemon, charmander of course. And then, only then, will I begin my journey to becoming the pokemon master!”

Yoongi lowered his bottle and leaned his drunk friend towards the other side of the couch. “Whatever you say, you tall fool.”

After turning down multiple invitations to go out, Namjoon and Yoongi finally decided to attend a party that was hosted by a mutual friend. It was nothing special, just a normal weekend party with a lot of drunk college students. 

Amongst the sea of drunk folks, Namjoon was rambling about his dream to become the pokemon master, a usual conversation he has when he’s drunk. Yoongi, on the other hand, was more so tipsy than drunk. He blankly listened to Namjoon and drew a few long sighs before he decided that he needed to take a breather.

“Namjoon. I’ll be outside for a little bit. Jackson is right over here if you need to puke or something.” Yoongi shook Namjoon’s shoulder and waited for a response, but all he got was a mumble of incoherent words. Yoongi shrugged, letting Jackson know he’ll be right outside.

“Ugh, Jesus.” Yoongi stumbled onto a random bench that was behind the dormitory. He looked up, street light beaming down on him and the first thing he thought of was the truckload of notes he had to go through. He shut his eyes and mentally planned out his schedule for next week. 

Yoongi worked at a music store a few stoplights away from the university and he was going to be working three closing nights next week. This meant he needed to fit in sleeping and studying into his life somehow.

He felt his eyebrow twitch. I can feel my soul leaving my body.

“—gi!”

Huh?

“Min Yoooooooongi!”

Yoongi snapped his eyes open and was made face to face with a familiar facial structure.

“Oh, it’s really you. That green hair really comes in handy, huh?”

He blinked a few times until the hazy image in front of him became clear.

Silver hair. Glasses. Dimples—

“Y/n?!”

He finally twisted his body around to take a good look at you. You waltzed from behind the bench to the empty spot next to him.

“The one and only.” You smiled. “Were you at JB’s party too?”

“Yeah. I just needed some air.” Yoongi sighed. “Namjoon is in there somewhere.”

You crossed your right leg over your left. “I saw him clinging onto that Jackson guy, wanted to say hi, but there’s way too many people inside.”

Yoongi snickered remembering how much you hate crowded places.

“How have you been? You haven’t come around the apartment as much as the beginning of the semester.” He straightened himself out, getting a better look at you.

The last time he saw you with your natural hair color was during your high school graduation and just before you dyed it silver, you had a combination of purple and pink in your hair. At first your parents used to give you shit about constantly coloring your hair, but over time it seems like they got used to it.

Having you over the apartment was normal during the beginning of the semester. You usually went over to take a nap on Namjoon’s bed, do some homework while you waited for your roommate to finish her shift at work, or you would sometimes join them for dinner.

From what Namjoon mentioned, you also got yourself a part time job as a waitress to help with expenses. This is what made your visits to their apartment less frequent. Looking at you now, it was like Yoongi hasn’t seen you in forever.

“Tired, stressed, feeling a bit defeated, but hanging on.” You laughed. “How about you? And how’s that TA situation going?”

Yoongi chuckled dryly. “She’s uh, well, she’s still pushing her efforts.”

He recalled the conversation he had with you and Namjoon a few months ago about how the teacher’s assistant in his economics class tries to flirt with him. The TA promised him a whole letter grade change if he chose to sleep with her and this offer would last until finals.

“And you really don’t want to?”

“I really don’t.” Yoongi sighed. “I don’t know why she chose me out of all people.”

You adjusted yourself and swung your arm around to drop it behind the bench. Yoongi caught a glimpse of your gaze and the pink flush that was stamped on your cheeks. It was probably the alcohol, but you had a mysterious glow about you that he couldn’t put his finger on.

“I mean,” you began. “Why wouldn’t she?”

Wha—

As you inched closer towards Yoongi, your denim jacket slid down your shoulder, revealing your bare shoulder that was barely supporting the strap of the black dress you were wearing. If his head was on right, he was sure you were trying to make a move on him.

“Uh—um, y/n?” Yoongi stuttered.

“Hmm?”

Your response came out as a pur and the alcohol was probably messing with his head because he could feel goosebumps rise on his skin.

“I—”

“Your TA has great taste if you ask me.” You breathed, your face now inches away from Yoongi’s. You lifted your hand and carefully touched a few stands of his mint green locks. “If I was your TA, I think I’d ask the same thing.”

Yoongi’s breath caught in his throat and he turned his face away from yours. “Y/n, I—I think you had a little too much to drink. Why don’t I go and get you some water?”

Before Yoongi could stand, you circled your hand around his wrist to keep him in place. “I’m fine, Yoongi. Just stay with me here, please?”

Alcohol. Too much fucking alcohol.

Yoongi was in panic mode. He really shouldn’t stay with you because he wasn’t sure how things were going to turn out. There was no way he was going to lie to himself and say you weren’t attractive. The years have done you so well to the point where it was almost impossible to picture you as the twelve year old he met years ago.

Namjoon never told Yoongi that he wasn’t allowed to hit on you. Maybe it was because Yoongi never made any advances. But whenever their other friends would joke around saying that Yoongi was going to hit on you next because you were actually friends with him, Namjoon wouldn’t bite back. He would simply say “well, he’s not a bad guy unlike some guys I know.”

Did this give Yoongi the green light? Even if it did, he still felt guilty looking at the innocent facial expression you had that clashed with your outfit choice.

“Y/n, I’m honestly flattered. But I can’t—I can’t stay with you here.” Yoongi tried to sound firm.

From his wrist, you slid your hand down to delicately hold onto his fingers.

“Then we can go somewhere else.”

“Y/n.” Yoongi said. “Just—I ca—I need to go and check on your brother.”

He wriggled himself out of your fingers and just before he turned away from you, he caught you pouting and almost glaring at him. Just as guilty as he felt even thinking about staying with you for the night, he felt the same way walking away from you.

What the fuck. What the fuck. What the fuck.

Yoongi entered the dorm and leaned his head a little too harshly against the door.

“Wha—What the fuck.”

↠↞

Two weeks flew by and Yoongi hasn’t seen you since that night. Sure, there were times he spotted you on campus flaunting your bright eyes and dimpled smile but he would avoid you. Since that night, he shamelessly hasn’t been able to tear the image of you out of his mind.

There had to be something wrong. That was the only explanation because now just at the sight of you, Yoongi could feel his heart start to pound.

When the semester began, you easily leaned your head against his shoulder whilst watching tv and Yoongi wouldn’t mind at all. You’ve patted his cheeks, twirled locks of his hair in between your fingers, and you even fell asleep with your head in his lap once. He saw you drunk once or twice in their apartment, but you’ve never come onto him like that. Plus, you never looked at him with that mysterious glint in your eye before.

Were those—

—little touches your acts of flirting? And I was just too fucking dumb to realize it?! Augh—!

“Yoongi! You’ve been thrashing around on the sofa for like ten minutes! The fuck is wrong with you?!” Namjoon shouted.

Yoongi shoved his face in one of the throw pillows. He was losing his goddamn mind and there was no way he could tell Namjoon because the reason for Yoongi’s constant thrashes was Namjoon’s sister. It would be too awkward to talk about even if Namjoon was his best friend.

“Namjoon.” Yoongi sighed. “I think I’m seeing the light. Tell my mom I love her.”

“You need to relax. Grab a drink, hook up with someone, eat an entire cake! Do something because seeing your arms flap around for ten minutes is driving me insane.” Namjoon replied.

As soon as Namjoon mentioned to hook up with someone, Yoongi sat up straight and trudged towards the fridge to grab a beer. He was done with his classes for the day and it was his day off, so he should be relaxing. But how could he relax in this state?

“By the way, y/n is almost here.”

Yoongi almost spat out his beer. “Y-Y/n? Is coming he-here?”

“Yeah?” Namjoon scrunched his eyebrows. “Remember—actually, I mentioned it while you were having a complete system malfunction on the couch. You most likely don’t remember.”

Great. Just great.

Yoongi stood at the kitchen counter and then glanced at Namjoon who was diligently typing away at his laptop.

At least Namjoon is here. I don’t think I can be alone with her.

Five minutes later, you showed up at the doorstep with two bags of takeout from the restaurant you worked at. You gave Namjoon a hug and playfully flicked Yoongi’s forehead as a greeting. Yoongi immediately held up his guard around you, but you smiled at him like you always did, melting away the defensive armor he set up.

“Ugh, Joon. If mom found out that you use a dishwasher, she’d pull your sideburns.” You stood in front of the sink to wash the dishes that were piled up.

“You’re telling me that you and Wendy don’t use your dishwasher in your apartment?”

“Of course not!”

While you and Namjoon bickered, Yoongi sat on the sofa sipping on his second can of beer. He took a peek at you and even with your shoulders covered up with a university hoodie, he could still picture it bare with your denim jacket and dress strap sliding down. He panicked at the image in his head and snapped his attention back at the tv.

This was just a mere physical attraction. Nothing more, nothing less. Yoongi was too busy to be dating at the moment, so he hasn’t been with anyone for months, of course he would react a certain way when an attractive female would come onto him like that.

But you were you! I can’t be thinking like this.

“Yoongi, you said the professor for math 103 was easy, you liar.” You plopped down on the opposite end of the couch and whacked him with your math workbook.

“He is easy. What’s so hard about his class?”

“Everything! Look!”

You snatched a throw pillow to sit on it on the wooden floor and opened up your workbook to showcase multiple red markings all over the page.

Yoongi sputtered to stifle his laughter and you automatically pinched his ankle.

“Ow! Okay, calm down, let me see.” Yoongi sunk down onto the floor beside you.

At that moment, he completely forgot the nervous feeling inside of him. It was like everything was back the way it used to be; no weird vibes, no unnecessary needs to scoot five feet away from you, it was like nothing ever happened between the two of you.

“The mix what?!” 

Namjoon had been on the phone with one of his coworkers for quite some time and the sudden volume of Namjoon’s voice startled both you and Yoongi.

“Ugh, no, don’t—just leave it as is. I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

Yoongi widened his eyes. He’s leaving?! But he’s not the campus radio host today?!

“Geez. Okay guys. I gotta go for a while. Seokjin thinks he ruined today’s mix and I need to try and recover it.” Namjoon walked over to the front door with his laptop in hand and jacket in the other. “I’ll be back later. Y/n, be nice. Stop giving Yoongi a hard time.”

You chuckled and flipped him off. Ah, sibling love.

The front door clicked shut and Yoongi’s mind went blank.

This wasn’t supposed to happen. Yoongi, you were doing a great job in avoiding y/n and now here you are, alone with her.

“Yooooooongi.” You lightly jabbed Yoongi’s arm with your pen and then tapped at your workbook. “You didn’t finish explaining this.”

He blinked away his thoughts and cleared his throat, bringing his attention back to your math workbook.

It intrigued him how normal you were acting. You were talking and making jokes how you always did. You didn’t touch him inappropriately, only bumped into his shoulder a few times. 

Yoongi felt stupid for overreacting about nothing. He assumed that the alcohol you had that night was just messing with your head and you weren’t in the right mind. He felt relieved.

Kind of…?

“Ughhhhhhhhh.” You groaned. “I’m gonna fail this fucking class.”

Yoongi smiled warmly at the way you dropped your head on the coffee table.

“You just need to study a little more.” He subconsciously placed a hand on your upper back.

You sighed loudly and whispered something along the lines of “I hate math. I hate college.” He snickered quietly and rubbed your back to console you.

It was quiet for a moment. The only sound that filled the room was the commentary of some game show that was playing on tv. 

You hadn’t said a single word for a while and Yoongi believed you fell asleep. He was still rubbing your back which made him think that’s what made you doze off. A couple strands of your silver hair fell against his hand and he twirled it around his fingers.

It seemed like every time he saw you, the image of the twelve year old girl he met years ago was going further and further away. But thinking of you as a woman made him feel ashamed, like he was betraying his best friend. Being physically attracted to someone was a normal human instinct, so he shouldn’t feel that bad, right?

Damn it, Yoongi. Why are you so torn for?! It’s not like you’re going to actually try something with y/n.

“Nnyoongi?” You whispered cutely and he abruptly stopped touching your hair. “So—Sorry for uh, you know, that night.”

You weren’t making eye contact with him. You probably also felt guilty for acting the way you did towards a friend of your brother’s.

“It’s okay. Alcohol makes everyone act some type of way.” Yoongi went back to twiddling the ends of your hair between his fingers. Maybe you regretted it?

You shifted your body, causing Yoongi to flinch and turned to stare right into his eyes. “I’m not going to ultimately blame it all on the alcohol though.”

“What do you mean?” He questioned.

“I mean,” you were now leaning in, face dangerously close to his own. “I’ve always thought you were pretty cute.”

What?

“M-Me?”

“Mhm.” You hummed sweetly, not breaking eye contact. “I didn’t want to say anything when I was in high school, but now that I’m in college, it shouldn’t be a problem right?”

Yoongi couldn’t say anything.

You squint your eyes at him. “Don’t tell me you still see me as a middle schooler.”

“N-No, I don’t. It’s not that.” He muttered.

“Then?”

He squeezed his eyes shut. There’s boundaries to this.

“You’re my best friend’s sister.” Yoongi said flatly. “I ca—can’t…”

You pouted and reached for his hand that was balled up in a fist next to you.

“But Joon never disapproved of you or anything.” You leaned in closer, your breath fanned across his cheek. “Do you really not see me as nothing more than your best friend’s sister?”

The seductive tone in your voice melted away every twelve year old image he had of you. The only girl he saw in his eyes was the current you and it was driving him insane.

“N-No.” He managed to say.

“Well…?” Your voice came out as a whisper and you continuously inched closer and closer towards Yoongi to the point where there was barely any breathing space between the two of you.

Yoongi could hear his heart thumping in his chest.

This can’t be okay... but... 

But he wanted it so bad.

“I—”

In the blink of an eye, Yoongi’s voice was cut off by the sudden gesture of your lips pressing against his. You had one of your hands secured around his nape and your other hand rested on the floor beside him, caging him against you.

Was he supposed to kiss you back? You weren’t backing away from him and your lips felt unbelievably soft against his. This wasn’t supposed to happen but… fuck it, it’s happening.

Yoongi reached out to cup your cheek and boldly moved his lips against yours. He felt your body flinch and prepared himself for you to stop, but you slipped your arms around Yoongi’s neck and deepened the kiss. You prodded your tongue into his mouth and Yoongi eagerly accepted the invitation.

The hand that cupped your cheek slid down to your waist. This movement prompted you to let out a quiet moan that rippled into Yoongi’s mouth, surprising him.

Yoongi broke the kiss and turned his head away from you. What the fuck am I doing?

It was your turn to cup his cheeks and make him lock eyes with you. Your eyes were clouded with lust, hypnotizing Yoongi to the very core.

“Uh oh. I want more.” You breathed.

Yoongi could barely grasp the situation, but he did know one thing. He also desperately wanted more.

“Shit.” Yoongi hissed and captured your lips once more, showing no hesitation in finding your tongue. He wanted to hear more of you, more of the same sweet moan you let out not too long ago.

You pushed the coffee table away with your foot, making room to adjust your body to straddle Yoongi. Within those movements, the kiss never broke. Yoongi’s desire blurred all of his senses. He was intoxicated by your taste and the animalistic desire to feel more of you. He rustled around and slipped his hands under your hoodie to properly touch your skin.

The touch was electrifying. You nipped at Yoongi’s bottom lip and tangled your fingers within his hair. The breathy moans that escaped your mouth as you kissed excited Yoongi even more. There was no way he could hide the excitement; goosebumps rose on his skin and each second that ticked on caused a tight feeling in his stomach and before he knew it—

“Hmm, what do we have here?” You broke the kiss and pressed your forehead against his own.

You gripped his shoulders and grinded your lower body against the hardened member. Yoongi winced and gripped your waist harder.

“Wa—Wait, y/n. Thi—This—ergh…” Yoongi could barely muster a sentence because you roll your hips and let out broken sighs against the shell of his ear. It was obvious how much you wanted him and it was also painfully obvious how much he wanted you, but he wasn’t sure how much farther he could go.

You tipped Yoongi’s chin up and he was made face to face with a not-so-innocent look on your face. Even with your dimples poking out, glasses at the tip of your nose, a glaze of lust swept across your face and Yoongi was losing all of his self control.

“Yoongi.” You purred. “I want you so bad.”

You showed no mercy in leaning back a little to reach down to touch Yoongi’s cock that was clothed behind his thin pair of athletic shorts. A quiet groan ripped passed his teeth at the feeling of your finger tips tugging down the waistband of his shorts and boxers.

“Y/n… ahh… what are we doing…” Yoongi could barely comprehend the words that fell out of his mouth because of the warmth of your fingers circle around his shaft.

“We are studying,” you sighed. “Studying each other.”

You slowly pumped your hand and Yoongi was at your mercy. He let out breathy whimpers and relocated his hands from your waist to your ass that was clothed behind a pair of silk shorts. If he wasn’t in such a haze, Yoongi would have assumed that you planned this from the start.

“Yeah?” Yoongi grunted, playing right into your hands. “Study harder.”

You smirked and leaned in to kiss Yoongi while giving him a hand job. He pushed his hands underneath your shorts to squeeze your ass. A delicious whine was earned and Yoongi wiggled his fingers beneath your panties until he felt wetness on his fingers.

“Heh, well what do we have here,” Yoongi mimicked your words and your movements abruptly stopped.

“Yoon—Yoongi…” you panted.

“Lift your hips a little.” He instructed and you obediently listened. When you lifted your hips, Yoongi had easier access to your dripping wet center.

You were trying hard to focus on your own hand movements, but Yoongi kept a steady pace sliding his finger against your clit and in between your folds. All you could do was chant Yoongi’s name into his ear and feel your entire body melt into his hands.

“Ahh… Yoongi, en—enough, please.” You begged and Yoongi obeyed, waiting for you to continue speaking. “Fuck me. Please fuck me.”

Yoongi felt his heart stop in his chest. Did you really ask…? He screwed his eyes shut and ripped his hands away from your center to rest on top of your thighs.

“Y/n, what you’re asking me… you do realize what you’re asking?” Yoongi asked, trying to hold a steady breath.

“I do.”

You tugged at Yoongi’s waist band to bring down his shorts just a bit further. His length sprung out and you instinctively licked your lips already anticipating what was going to happen next. Yoongi’s hands found home on your waist, just beneath your hoodie, and you propped yourself up on your knees. He gawked at the way you pulled aside your shorts and panties at the same time.

She’s so sexy…

You used your free hand to pump his cock a few times, lifting your finger to your mouth, sucking off a small layer of precum. Just as you did that, Yoongi widened his eyes realizing an important element.

“Y-Y/n, wait, stop!” He was once again in panic mode, startling you.

“Ugh, Yoongi, what--”

“I don’t have con-condoms…” Yoongi’s voice grew soft at the end.

Embarrassed? Fuck yeah, Yoongi was embarrassed. An attractive girl just came onto him, begging him to fuck her right then and there, and boom, he realized that he had no condoms in the apartment.

To be honest, he feared that you would ask him to just go without because there were many risks involved. He couldn’t do that to you.

“Oh,” You said softly.

Shit… I ruined the moment.

“It’s alright, Yoongi. I would never do it without one either, so it’s okay.” You stroked his cheek and smiled.

He let out a breath of relief. Thank God.

“But what are we going to do with this?”

Yoongi flinched at the touch of your warm hand grasping his shaft. You leaned in and left a trail of kisses from his cheek, the corner of his mouth, his jawline, and on against his neck. Sucking softly, Yoongi gripped your thigh and felt his body tremble. If you hadn’t noticed already, his neck was definitely a weak spot.

You seemed to enjoy getting him off, but Yoongi wasn’t going to let you leave the apartment without making you feel just as good as he was feeling at that moment. He swiftly grabbed your thighs and laid you down with your head resting on the throw pillow you were using earlier.

“Pull your panties to the side.” Yoongi commanded with a rough tone.

“Bu—But Yoongi—”

“Be a good girl and just trust me.”

Just like that, you did as you were told, spreading your legs a little to give Yoongi more room. He pressed the base of his cock against your entrance and slowly dragged it upwards, rubbing it against your clit. A strangled garble of his name left your lips and you covered your eyes with your forearm.

“Nghhh, Yoongi—”

He picked up his pace, turning you into a puddle of broken syllables. You continuously cried out his name, gripping the fabric of your shorts and panties. The sound of your voice turned Yoongi on even more and made him want to wring his neck for not having condoms in the apartment.

“Fuck, y/n, I want to be inside you so bad.” Yoongi grunted, pressing against you harder.

“Me—Me too, aghh, Yoon—gi—!” You revealed your face to him. Your eyes were a bit glassy and your cheeks had a beautiful flush across your cheeks. It was a sight that Yoongi never thought he’d ever see in his life.

The sound of his phone going off scared the shit out of him when he took a peek and found out it was Namjoon. He took his phone then glanced at you who looked confused as to why his movements began to slow down.

“Wha—”

“Shhhhhh.” Yoongi whispered. “Yeah, Namjoon?”

Your eyes widened and you covered your mouth with your hand.

“The flash drive on your desk?” Yoongi enjoyed the adorable look on your face as you tried to keep your voice down. It made him want to tease you. “What time does he go on air?” He resumed the pace he had in the beginning, roughly pressing his length against you and by the look in your eyes, you wanted nothing more than to let your voice out.

“Okay, just—hah—just wait a bit. I’ll be there—yeah, kay’ bye.” As soon as Yoongi hung up, you let out your voice in an instant.

“Fuck, Yoongi, fuck, fuck, fuuuuuck!” You arched your back against the floor and raked your hand through your hair. He felt your thighs tremble and your breathing became jagged.

“You’re so fucking cute.” Yoongi chuckled and lifted your hoodie, revealing your stomach. Just like you, Yoongi let out a soft string of curses with your name mixed into it. He lifted himself up a couple of inches, placed a hand beside your head to steady himself and leaned forward, spilling his cum onto your stomach.

For a moment, the air was filled with the sound of both of you breathing and in the blink of an eye, the realization of what just happened hit Yoongi like a truck.

“Uh—uh, wait, I can—” Yoongi shimmied around to pull his waistband back up and staggered into the kitchen to retrieve something to wipe your stomach with.

Damn it, Yoongi. What happened to your self control?! Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

Without another word, Yoongi wiped you down with a damp cloth and avoided eye contact with you. What was he supposed to say at a time like this? Thank you? Let’s do it again sometime?

“You mentioned that Joon needs a flash drive or something?” You asked, slicing the silence into two.

“Yeah. He needs it to save the mix he mentioned earlier.”

“I can drop it off since I have to head out anyways.” You sat up once Yoongi rolled your hoodie back down. “He’s at the studio, right?”

“He is—are you sure, y/n? Because I can just go.”

The two of you stood up at the same time and you brushed down Yoongi’s shirt. On an impulse, he also straightened out your hoodie, pulling on the strings to make them the same length.

“No, it’s fine. I’ll just text Joon on my way out.” Even if you just straightened out some of the wrinkles on his shirt, you gently tugged at his collar to bring him down to your height. In one quick motion, you stole another kiss; one on his cheek and another on his lips.

Yoongi was taken back but showed no hesitation in kissing you back. He patted your head and the two of you just stood there, gazing into each other’s eyes.

Nothing was going to be the same anymore and who knew what his relationship was going to be like with you at this point. And most importantly, if Namjoon caught wind of this, how would he react?! Yoongi had to keep this from Namjoon for a while, just until he figured out what was going to happen between you and him.

“Yoongi, are you free tomorrow? Anytime after five?” You were now cupping his cheek, asking him a simple question with the entire galaxy in your eyes.

“Hmm, yeah, I’m free. What’s up?”

“Do you mind coming by my place then? I still need some help with some math 103 stuff and…” you tippy toed to reach his ear. “I think you and I still have more studying to do, so be prepared.”

Yoongi’s heart thumped harshly in his chest. After what just happened, he couldn’t turn you down even if he tried.

“Oh...kay.”

You grazed his bottom lip with your thumb and he placed a small kiss right on the pad. Once again, you tugged his face down for a chaste kiss, making his head spin.

“Then I’ll see you tomorrow, Yoongi. I’ll grab Joon’s flash drive myself.” You stuffed your books inside your backpack and disappeared into Namjoon’s room.

The sound of the tv was drowned out by the thunderous noise of Yoongi’s heart beat. Two weeks ago, Yoongi refused to stay with you that night and now everything made a complete 180. You were no longer y/n, twelve year old girl and Namjoon’s baby sister. You were now y/n, a college freshman who had Yoongi instantly wrapped around your finger.

Just before you left the apartment, you waved at Yoongi and sent him a wink. The last thing he saw was your dimple and a pink tint at the top of your cheek. He put a hand to his face and the warmth was apparent.

What in the actual fuck.

-

-

-

♡ rae jagi

[midnight-heroes]

Hello! Could I get an MHA matchup please? Triggers of death, and PTSD in this bio! (It's not too graphic, I just wanted to warn you) Galusuave, 15, 5’7”,Galusuave is broken. She lost everyone she knew and loved in a spaceship crash three years ago, except for her now 6 year old nephew, Rexio. (She’s an alien) The trauma of losing pretty much everyone makes it very hard for her to connect with others, except Rexio, whom she is FIERCELY protective over. 1/6

She also hates beaches, pools and large bodies of water, because of what it did to her family. She had to go through 3 years of working to get her and her nephew a life on Earth. She had no support when it came to the trauma, so it only got wose. She was taken by the police, but both her and Rexio were so scared that they ran away, and covered themselves up midnight-blue robes she made with her sewing skills. 2/6

She's apathetic, but does what she's told. She has great control of her quirk, Portals. She can create up to 6 portals from her hands. However, they all look exactly the same, so she has to remember which ones go together. The portals are created at close range, and can only be created from the users hands, one per hand. They can be picked up and moved, but the user has to physically go there in order to put it there. Like the user cant just open some random portal to nowhere. 3/6

The user must have a totally open palm to create the maximum size portal, a circle/oval shape with a diameter of 10 ft. She loves playing with Rexio and showing him new illusions and magic trick she has learned. She got into Kosei Academia for Heroic Studies (temp name) in Hokkaido through the headmaster and school counselor/her homeroom teacher, who managed to gain her trust after he helped her get aid. She lives in classroom that was turned into a bedroom for her and her nephew. 4/6

She's insecure about her alien parts, being her neon red skin, bright orange hair, blue blood and detailed scars of courage from her shoulders to elbows, and thighs to knees, and her 7 fingers per hand. She doesn't fully understand human culture, and she doesn't like to get close to people, because she fears she may lose them. All she wants is to go back to her planet, but she can't get back anytime soon. 5/6

She needs to make some friends, before her PTSD from the accident consumes her whole, because it's already got 90% of her. Her s/o needs to love Rexio. No buts. Any gender is fine, she doesn't judge. And a student please Thanks for making it this far, my broken baby and her nephew need some love! 6/6

So, first off, I would like to say, that I love this character so much. This poor baby deserves so much love

Alright, so let's start off with a few friends for Galusuave (cool name btw). I put some careful consideration into this, so I hope you approve. I'll be putting a best friend in here, two average friends and then a significant other.

Best friend: Mina Ashido

So, for obvious reasons, I chose Mina because I feel like they would bond over their alien-like appearances. She is the Ridley Hero: Alien Queen after all. They probably would have met through passing each other on the street. Mina would have taken interest in her appearance immediately. I think it would be a somewhat forced friendship at first, Mina pushing her friendship onto Galusuave, not to be irritating, but just wanting to get to know her and make another friend. That's who she is after all. After becoming friends, I feel like it would become known very quickly that Mina is ready to help whenever she is needed, no matter how hard it is for her to get over there and give her a hand.

She is always willing to play games with young Rexio. In fact, she absolutely adores him so is bound to ask if she can be his babysitter and such whenever Galusuave isn't able to bring him somewhere or keep an eye on him. Those magic tricks and illusions Galusuave likes to perform for Rexio? Mina goes absolutely nuts for them as well. She is always so psyched when she has something new to show them and is constantly asking to be taught some cool tricks!

Mina is also super protective of, well, everyone. She will not stand for bullying so if someone was to give her or Rexio a hard time for their appearances, she would have something to say about it, whether they intimidate her or not. She'll always be there for her, thick and thin, even if she feels she doesn't need Mina to be there.

Considering she is also super social, she would be good for Galusuave, considering she would help her socialise with others, start to make bonds with people and hopefully get rid of this fear of getting close to people because she's scared of a scenario that probably won't happen. If she is really feeling uncomfortable however, Mina will casually end the meet up with some simple excuse and would get the poor girl out of there to calm down and do their own thing.

Final two points; the hatred towards large bodies of water and the portals. Mina would want to help with the thing against water, whether it is a fear or just plain hatred. She wants to get Galusuave into the water some more so they can have beach/pool days with everyone. Of course, she would never dream of forcing this though. Now the portals, she would see as an excuse to play some games. She would call it a form of training, setting up large portals in random places, but still in a single area - such as a training field or something - and would invite people to play a game of quirk gang-up tag (Where I'm from, we call this gang chasey). The portals would be used as shortcuts, and as the name suggests, you're allowed to use your quirk to your advantage, but you can't be off the ground for more than a few seconds to make it fair. The chaser would catch one person, then they would both go after the others until everyone had been tagged. It would be a good way to use their quirks in different ways, while having fun and socialising.

Two close friends: Toru Hagakure and Momo Yaoyorozu

These two were chosen based on the belief that Mina would take this sweet child on a girl's night out. While all the girl's in 1-A would be there, plus maybe some from a couple other classes, I feel like Toru and Momo would get closer to her than others, helping to bring her out of her shell to have some fun. This would lead to some more nights out with just the four of you along with some sleepovers at Momo's manor (or even the dorm if they can get away with it). Of course, Mina would insist Rexio be there as well so he wasn't lonely and would feel included. Of course, this would come with some girly consequences, but it's all in good fun.

Toru would be the type that is totally into makeovers and would be the one constantly insisting they go shopping or hang out together in a somewhat stereotypical 'girly' way.

Momo on the other hand, would invite her out often to experience some of the finer things in life, just to show her what some of the good things are about their planet and such. She wants to show her as much as possible while she can.

While these girls aren't Galusuave's best friends, like Mina, they are there going to be there for her if she needs them.

Significant other: Eijiro Kirishima

I was conflicted about this one, but I saw him as fitting. I was going to pick Mina for this actually, but everyone needs a really good friend by their side without there being any tension because one likes the other.

So, Eijiro would start to like her, purely based on the things Mina says about her at school. Hearing bits and pieces about her peaked his interest and he would start asking questions until Mina decided to introduce the two of them. Eijiro would be comfortable about the whole thing, introducing himself casually and such. Of course, it isn't guaranteed that Galusuave would be as comfortable as he was, but you have to start somewhere right?

Meetings with him would start off short, somewhat awkward and of course, supervised by Mina because she didn't want her bestie to become uncomfortable. When things seemed to be going well, Mina would start making excuses as to why she couldn't make it to group get togethers, or Eijiro would start asking Galusuave to hang out together, just the two of them. He would show her things he found cool, take her to do fun things and would totally have 'manly' play dates with Rexio, where he would take him to the park or something like that.

When Eijiro realised he had a thing for her, it became a little harder for him to talk and would find his heart beating rapidly in his tightening chest. It would take him a little while, but he would eventually ask her out on a date in hopes that she wouldn't freak out and say no to him.

The romance blooms from there, the two of them getting to know each other even more and hanging out a lot. Of course, whenever Bakugo was involved, it was kinda awkward, but that's why the whole Bakusquad would come if Bakugo was to be there. Just to keep things safe. To be honest though, it would probably be Mina that invited everyone when the two of them just wanted to hang out together - Not that it wasn't fun in the end.

Then... if she really, still wanted to go home, Eijiro wouldn't argue. Of course, it would break his heart that he - and the others - weren't enough to make her want to stay, but he would want her to be happy. If going home was to make you happy, then he would do anything in his power to ensure she gets her dream.

//Holy, this ended up so much longer than I first envisioned. I loved working on this so much though and I love that the best friend part ended up the longest, but it's sisters before misters after all! I hope you liked this!

And if anyone is interested in getting a match-up like this, just let me know and give me as much information to work with as possible. I think it would work best with ocs, but I'm sure I could manage either way.