#and that she’s weak like her parents

[lgbtlunaverse]

Horrible thing to say but I think there's a real chance Jiang Yanli was both of her parents' least favorite child and knew it and just kinda. Had to go on with her life knowing that.

[ganondoodle]

so with echoes of wisdom .. i havent watched any of the trailers beyond the very first one and the thumbnails/screenshots and what others have said about it-

but with the world inside the rift being called "Welt des Nichts" aka "world of nothing/void" in german ('still' in english, for some reason) and demises title in french being "avatar of nothing" ... yeah my anxiety is shooting through the roof again

(hopefully you can be a little more forgiving for me being anxious/weird about it bc demise is my blorbo)

i had similar worries with totk, that werent proven true thankfully, but the darn book is making it all worse again with all those weird lore things the game doesnt even so much as hint at AND potential retcons- im in for a really rough time huh, not just stress in real life (more in tags.. its alot) but now about my specific hyperfixation from two things even (AND artblock still..)

weird as it may sound, i dont want demise to get more lore, partly bc i dont believe theyd do anything with him that i would like (given their track record) but much more importantly- the fact that he has this little lore about him is precisely one of the reasons why i fell in love with him, i tend to like characters that are neglected by the narrative, and his story being both so flat and already done meant i can be very creative with what i come up with for him without necessarily contradicting anything in canon (which is ... or was a big point of how i wrote destiny's story and lore, working with canon in a way that reframes it all without straight up ignoring it ... but i suppose i urgently need to let go of that and accept i spend alot of time working things that will go to waste :( ) AND not having to worry that there will be more stuff with him that would massively change not only what im writing but also potentially how i feel about him since the game he was briefly in was the oldest chronologically and ended with his death- i didnt expect them to mess with anything that far back and thought theyd just go forward and leave the timeline behind and wouldnt mess with it again, given how botw seemed to be a sort of 'fresh start' that seemingly regarded the past as the past that needs to rest and that the timeline was finally no longer a discussion if everythings unified through botw and one thing going forward

but i suppose i was very wrong with that .__.

right now the only thing that motivates me still is the left over determination and spite to work on my zelda comic, since i have never gotten this far and really want to get something done for once, but i cant lie that im feeling like i should pause all work on it too to wait and see waht the book and the new game will do .. either to determine if i still have the will to keep working on it after those things are out (my love for tloz has been taking alot of hits lately ..) or if i have to change stuff (mostly bc of my lore problem trying to not ignore it ..)

[nightmarearian]

do you think the abyss healed Childe’s scars?

realistically I know it’s stupid graphics & model “limitations”

But do you think his skin looks as normal as it did before he fell.

Cause when they’re hit, an abyss monster.

They disintegrate.

Do you think Ajax’s scars healed like that? In the abyss? After it, too?

Do you think they burned? Or was it numb, as the darkened skin faded away with little, yellow, glowing particles?

That he has no evidence of his suffering for those three months in hell (and his only companion’s silence) but dull eyes no one wants to look at?

Callouses on his hands and feet that no one pays attention to? Takes care of?

That he shows his prowess and uncanniness and abyssal hunger because that’s the only way how? Yes. he is hungry and wants a fight. Look at him. He’s off. Broken now.

Look at him.

Please.

[stagefoureddiediaz]

Eddie diaz dealing with his mommy issues arc in season 8 is feeling realer to me than ever right now

[dandelion-blues]

A PJO Headcannon

Idea time:

So, I was reading this fic (it's really good so far btw) and the author was thinking of making Nancy a demigod, and who her godly parent should be, and I thought of Laverna.

Laverna, the Roman Goddess of thieves, cheats, and the Underworld. She was believed to rule Rome's underground with her army of outcasts.

Here I'm thinking that Nancy is just a kid acting out, abandoned by her mom, and being a bully when seeing someone that's like her and has one parent (Percy) and taking it out on him. Also, in the books, Rick described Nancy in an unflattering way, which could go with her feeling like an outcast and whatnot.

It's not an excuse to her behavior, but I think it'd actually be pretty cool to give Nancy a bit more of a backstory. Like how some bully's lash out to hurt, so they don't feel the hurt themselves. And we only knew Nancy as a 12 year old.

But what if when Nancy grows older and learns of her heritage, she doesn't join the Legion like many demigods, but ends up forming a group of other outcasts who feel unloved and were thrown out by society.

Backstory:

Nancy wasn't sure how old she was when she knew that her dad didn't love her like other parents loved their kids. Five? Younger? Nancy didn't know, but she knows it's been a fact of her life for a very long time.

But Nancy got by. After all, even if she didn't have her dad's love, she had his money. That's why she went to expensive boarding schools was sent away and wore pristine itchy uniforms.

Nancy grew up around the cold walls and fleating sunlight of dorms and schools, and it was home to her. Moreso than the beach house her dad lives in.

The damp underground smell when the rain soaked the cracked cement and the running tracks dirt was euphoria. While the sea salt smell on her dad was like a smothering perfume on his skin that was a reminder of all the nonexistent hugs and loving caresses she would never have.

And Nancy's mother. Well, as far as Nancy is concerned, she doesn't exist. Ignoring all the times she cried for a parent, a mother, to love her.

Dad called her mom some whore, and left it at that.

Still, sometimes Nancy's dad would say how Nancy was taking after her mother's unappealing beauty.

Her too orange freckles smeared across her face like powdered cheese instead of like glinting bronze or perfectly clear skin.

Ignoring how Nancy actually liked her freckles. She loved cheese because she imagined it was for royalty to be served at balls like the most divine dishes. At least she loved cheese until other kids started making fun of her cheese powder freckles like they were disgusting.

And that's not even touching on Nancy's frizzy red hair. Hair that Nancy thought was like Ms. Frizzle, the most adventurous and brave woman Nancy saw as a kid. The woman that Nancy looked up to and learned from on TV.

But of course, her dad hated her hair. While his hair was brown and straight, her's was a mess. A reminder of her mother.

And all these unapealing beauty marks just added up and up like a neverending pile of stones titering precariously over her, waiting for her to give up and let the stone's fall and crush her under the weight of her ugliness.

Each insult from her dad, from her peers, from adults around her, added more cracks to the stone tower. Her crooked teeth (she thought she looked like a fiercesome pirate), her prominent nose (a good detective always has a big nose), her tallness (she liked being taller than kids her age, made her not feel as small), her squinty eyes (like she was looking to steal something. It's true, she likes shiny things, besides surely they can do without some of their possessesions because they smile so carelessly without a worry).

So yeah, Nancy gets it. She's not attractive, but so what? Because of this, she's learned to use her words and body language to get what she wants. Other kids will use puppy eyes, and she'll call an adult a pervert and pickpocket from the "concerned" adults around her. And guess what? She'll get more than the kid who uses puppy eyes.

But she won't ever get a parent's love.

And now that Nancy's twelve, and going to sixth grade, she knows all the tricks. How to be the top dog at school, and be the teacher's favorite.

She'll surround herself with worshipers, and her heart will finally not feel so empty.

But why?

Why?

Why are there still people ignoring her?

And why does the one boy that smells like sea salt bring tears to her eyes?

It's because he reminded her of her dad. Her dad and that horrible beach house that she desperately tries to forget once school starts again.

And why does that boy, who seems to come from nothing, seem to have such a carefree smile?

No, it's not carefree. Nancy can see that it's strained, like hers.

But why does he still seem so happy?

Is it because of that cripple, Grover?

No, if that was it that Nancy would be happy. After all, she has better, more superior friends.

And yet why isn't she happy like him?

Why?

It makes Nancy furious. Her heart hammers in her chest, and her eyes sting. She clenches her teeth and balls her hands into fists.

What right does that nobody have to be so happy?

Is it because he has a mom that mails him blue cookies and handwritten letters in a cheap tuba ware box?

That he has a parent that loves him unlike her?

It doesn't matter because Nancy will do whatever it takes to wipe that happy smile off of Percy's face if it's the last thing she does.

Nancy's face burns bright red with pure retribution when it never seems to work. Her eyes gleam with fury as Grover and Percy seem to have gotten closer than ever after she started to pick on them. At least their math teacher, Mrs. Dodds seems to hate Percy just as much as her.

Whatever, she has more plans. Nancy rolls her eyes and washes her face as she gets ready for bed. She glances in the mirror, looking at all her ugly traits. Her yellowish eyes like pyrite, fake gold, glaring back at her while she scowls.

Ugly, deformed little girl. Trying to fill your empty heart again?

"Shut up!" Nancy yelled at her mirror self, and the other her seemed to grin maliciously back.

Ugh, your voice sounds as disgusting as how the rest of you looks.

"Stop." Nancy's voice cracks, her eyes watering, as she starts to tremble.

Tch, pathetic. Don't pretend to have emotions now. You mons-

Nancy screams and punches the mirror, the glass splintering before her as it cracks and falls.

Nancy sheild's her face in her arms, as the glass shattered and broke completely, thudding loudly as the pieces hit the sink and floor.

Nancy stood there a moment, breathing heavily, her heart pounding wildly. She lowers her arms, her left hand throbbing with pain, and looks at the shattered glass all on the ground and sink. Her blood mixes with the pure white tiles painting her crime scene red.

And for a second, when Nancy glances at the shard pieces, she doesn't see herself, but Percy. Another scarred kid with anger issues and wants to be heard. And then it's gone when Nancy blinks.

Nancy breathes a moment before slumping to the ground, laughing hysterically.

She's going crazy, hasn't she?

Seeing things?

Having more strength than a twelve year old girl should have?

H-how did she even do that?!

The mirror shouldn't have broken that easily!

Maybe she really is some depraved lunatic villain after all.

Nancy shakes her head in disbelief, some giggles spilling past her lips.

She looks at her blood entranced. It shines bright red and leaves her body. Has she ever lost so much blood before? She doesn't think she has.

Nancy continues to laugh and giggle.

She really is crazy isn't she?

Then, Nancy feels a lump in her throat, tears threatening to spill as she shutters a dry sob.

She's a monster!

And Nancy's leaves the bathroom in horror, her heart beating rapidly. She sinks into her bed covers, wincing as her hand is still bleeding, but she ignores it, like she ignores everything else and she forces herself to fall asleep in her single dormitory. Alone, not noticing tears leaving her eyes as she wants to forget everything and dream of everything she'll never have.

And the anguish Nancy feels only makes her feel more helpless and angry. So she does the only thing a twelve year old can think of when she has nothing else. She lashes out at the world - at everyone. Especially at those who dare to stand up to her. To be so happy when she never will be!

[ghostly-squid]

Time travel fix-it? No. Time travel worse-it.

[clumsycapitolunicorn]

it's been nearly 6 months since the ted lasso finale and im still pretty much:

[tinylilvalery]

What's interesting about witnessing the shift in Tom and Shiv's relationship, is that for the first 3 seasons Shiv got to live in comfort of being her father in the relationship. She was in control. She was the emotionally detached one, keeping Tom at a distance from her inner vulnerable self like her father does to her and her siblings, despite Tom always appealing to that side of her, bearing himself and wanting that intimacy. She held all the power, and in holding all the power she felt secure that she wasn't going to be screwed over (like her dad did to her mum) and abandoned (like she felt her mum did to her). She could escape the fucked up divorce her parents had by being the embodiment of power (her father),,, which, like a lot of children of a messy divorce, she wanted to avoid such a thing for herself at all cost, and pride herself on her marriage and choice of partner instead of getting help for the trauma and damage she'd carried since childhood. Shiv was safe. She was secure. Like her dad, she had her own dog to kick to test its loyalty and feel secure and reassured every time that dog came back to her side.

But then the dog did bite back. Tom did betray her. The man she viewed as beneath her, all worshipping, and in her eyes nowhere near as smart as her, outplayed her and betrayed her and won over the approval of the very man that she'd been emulating. And now she's not her father. She's the last person she ever wanted to be. She's her mother. She's the one on the receiving end of Logan through Tom, making the divorce messy and difficult and painful by using the same tactics he did with her mother, something that gets to her easily and makes her extremely upset to the point where she's verging on tears. Tom is the one at Waystar + ATN. Tom is the one saying "uh huh." To her.

She thought that she could escape her mother's fate by being her father. By being cold and distant and emotionally closed off. By being the one who kicked the dog. She let her trauma and fears rule and guide her into making decisions and behaving in harmful ways (to Tom and herself) that she thought would protect her and never let her be hurt. And none of it worked. Because despite it all, she became her mother.

[b00m-b0mb]

Something really funny that's occurred to me is the way Joe talks about Maccie is like she's some catastrophic event that happened to their family "I can't believe she's been here that long." / "Everything's been different since she was born" / "Everything changed." / "She changed everything."

And it's just rlly funny to me. I want to up the dramaticness of his words at some point. And anyway, he's talking to the Samurai/Ronin for the first time and I'm wondering the impression he's getting lmao

Joe is certainly expressive to me, but only when he's given the chance. And I think w Ronin, he just started letting a lot of stuff out bc thus guy is gonna go on his way anyways.. but then he's like wait!!! Actually let me go?? For a little? (Platonic yearning so bad)

Ronin like 》^. "I suppose.. Alright, curious karate man, I'll accompany you a little longer."

Or something I'm messing around UGH

[vaguehotels]

had the most braindead repetitive conversation/argument with my parents. buzz cuts are too masculine but if you dye a design on it it become effeminate which is bad because then you look weak and if youre weak then society falls apart (all societies ever that have fallen apart for any reason are actually because of feminine men) and we start sacrificing babies. and also all mental illness is invented because only 4 people had anxiety in the 90s and covid was made up so that we would all become gay and trans and then the government can control us better and be joe biden's little sex slaves. and also i need to keep my hair long because my father finds it attractive. what

[dipyronegirl]

thinking (and rewatching..) inside job again and i dont think rand is that bad of a father? i mean, he made a lot of mistakes and he doesn’t even feel bad ab it, even tho he traumatized reagan and a lot, but he was never absent. he acts like he cared ab reagan’s career just bc it could help his career, but that’s not true. he pushes her to be the best all the time and it’s bad, but he genuinely cares ab her so much. and the whole ‘creating crises to force her to hang out w him’ thing is fucked up, but it’s cute that he just wants to hang out w her that bad. most fathers literally don’t care enough ab their kids to do any of that. most fathers don’t even know their kids as much as he knows her. maybe my standards are just insanely low, probably, but he’s a better parent than 90% of the parents i know

[s0urte3th]

i do hate being vulnerable though

[my-thoughts-and-junk]

thinking about dream daddy again and god brian makes me so mad

[chaoticnerdsstuff]

This is about Boscha-

FIRST OF ALL HOW IN THE HELL IS SHE LIKE AZULA???

[palms-upturned]

You would think that the fact that I’ve had cats go missing in the past who were gone for like multiple weeks and then casually came back home like nothing happened or went up to somebody to ask for food who then took them back home to me would make this easier but no instead I’m sitting here thinking abt the fact that it could be weeks before I have Yarrow back home with me and feeling like my stomach is going to turn inside out

[todayisafridaynight]

From Daigo considering Kiryu a father figure and the substory with him in Y0 I assume Kiryu was there a lot to tell him not to be a little shit. Yayoi and Daigo do not have the closest relationship during his 30-year old rebellious teen phase, but I got the impression it wasn't always like that. The fact that 12-year old Daigo was hanging around Kamurocho with older kids does imply Yayoi wasn't keeping a close eye on him but I get the impression that what parenting she did do would have been vaguely in the right direction.

yeah yeah that's what i was referring to in me last ask: the fact that, through daigo's y0 substory, you learn that kiryu's pretty much been one of the only really consistent people in his life to hang out with him

when it comes to yayoi and her parenting though, she readily admits she priorities the clan over daigo's feelings and needs (not just when he's an adult, but admits that ever since he was a kid she and sohei have always chosen the clan over him). at the very least, she's incredibly self aware of how lacking she is as a mother, and so at the same time is remorseful about her inability to connect with nor help daigo when he needs it

all of that said, it's hard to gauge what her parenting skills are actually like. sure, daigo turned out to be a respectable man, but again kiryu- whether you like/hate him or question his capabilities as a father- had a key, significant role in daigo's upbringing and is undoubtedly the main influence on his personality and manners. considering how willing daigo was to bend to kiryu's word as a kid, it wouldn't be hard to assume that if yayoi was as hard on him as she is when he's an adult, he might not have had that rambunctious phase nor attitude. the most i can conclude about her parenting is that she's wholly neglectful (and outright abusive when it came to telling daigo she would be taking the role of acting chairman) due to her prioritization towards duty