#and sorry if this makes 0 sense

[akq96618]

After some rewatch, I think there's one "never mentioned" theme from king-ohger. That's "grief".

Almost all of the ranger's behaviors (both good and bad) are trauma responses. I also want to yap about how Gira goes through 5 stages of grief in the first episode and how both Himeno and Jeramie achieve the "acceptance" stage but my english isn't good enough to explain.

Don't worry! I understands what u mean, my english ain't that good either,

I had a thought about this too, every single kings deals with grief and losing dearest one, gira with losing memories of his past and don't want to lose his orphanage family, racles losing gira and his parents, rita with karras, himeno and jeramie who lost both of their parents,kaguragi who saw iroki sacrified herself for toufu, and yanma with his oldman,

And despite all of what happened to them in the past, they choose to move forward and protect what they have now, that's why i love king ohger so much .

what connected himeno and jeramie on ep 46 isn't just grodie who have a deal with them and their parents', but the weight of grief they carried their whole life, and what decision should they take in the end,

until now i still don't get it when they said 'death is the beauty of life', yeah maybe it makes us value our life more, knowing that death awaits us, but is the pain of people who being left by their beloved one is really worth it?

or maybe it's just me who haven't reached 'acceptance' stage like jeramie and himeno

here's a gira scene that got me thinking the whole day

[abstractfrog]

SILVER BLAZE PART THREE - happy jonkday everyone. one of these days i'll draw a scene that doesn't take place at night

[n1ghtwr1ter]

At the end of my latest TLT reread and it’s been physically painful attempting to read the last 40+ pages of Nona. Like, the short shrift that Gideon/Kiriona gets given by the people in the story…the theoretical good guys who honestly only see her as a thing, as a means to an end with an inconvenient dead soul attached to it… It makes me want to rip my own heart out of my chest.

Nobody has cared about Gideon her whole life. Most people, in fact, if they remembered about her at all, went out of their way to tell her how much they wished she didn’t exist. In the final chapters of Gideon, she finally gets the thing she’s been desperate for her whole life: somebody telling her that they need her, they care that she exists, and they badly want her to go on doing it. This allows her to make peace with the prospect that at the ripe old age of 18, she needs to die so that that person can go on living and living and living, using the castrated remnants of her soul as fuel to do so. Not a great way to go, but at least Gideon would get to be useful to somebody, would get to be remembered for something.

And then she wakes up in the wrong body, and finds out that her sacrifice - her attempt to be useful in the most selfless way possible, in that her self will no longer exist - has been rejected. And not only that, but the person she tried to give herself to - the one who was supposed to care about her - went to extreme lengths to make completely sure that she no longer remembered about Gideon.

She literally cut Gideon out of her brain.

And now, drifting along in the worst sort of half life where she’s inhabiting her body but it’s no longer really hers, in very obvious fashion - there’s holes in it, her heart is missing, and it’s got her shitty father’s handprints all over it (not even touching how much of a violation that is), indelibly - she finally meets back up with the small group of people who could theoretically be relied upon to be glad to see her again.

But then the one who was supposed to care about her most tries to kiss her (massively OOC for Harrow), and turns out to not even be there - it’s some weird baby inhabiting her body, and doing a really shit job of it too. The rest of them won’t stop talking about how they need her to break into the Tomb - as if she was just another key, same as the ones they worked together to acquire in Canaan House, just bigger and more inconvenient - and/or how they both fucked and killed her mom, who also (surprise, surprise) wished that Gideon had never existed, but saw her as a thing that needed to be done for the good of the mission.

Ultimately, they all make it abundantly clear - Palamedes, Camilla, Pyrrha, and especially Nona, all these people who are supposed to be kind and good and right - that they would prefer she wasn’t there. That it just be her body, with no Gideon attached - at least not Gideon the way she is now, broken and rejected and miserable. They would all far have preferred that she not have her own inconvenient thoughts and feelings and desires and impulses - that she just be inanimate and let the important people, the grown ups, get things done.

They wish she didn’t exist. Same as everybody else in her life, save one, and now she’s left wondering whether Harrow really meant it at all. Because if she did, she wouldn’t have left Gideon to Kiriona’s fate.

And honestly? Really, truly? I know everybody in the fandom loves Pal and Cam and Nona and Pyrrha, but in the end I couldn’t give less of a shit about them. They are fucking side characters, and as intriguing as Nona has been from a worldbuilding standpoint, I ultimately resent having been forced to read 400+ pages of filler bullshit about fucking side characters. I am a butch, and I’m here for my sarcastic, loving, angry, vulnerable, forgiving, and yes, inconvenient sword butch. I’m here for Gideon. But Gideon has been fridged for the last two books of the series in which she is supposed to be a, if not the, main character.

And it feels like almost nobody else in the fandom feels the same way, which, fine. I’m used to that. I’m also used to being told I’m projecting; and I’m used to being told that I’m inconvenient too, in my thoughts and my opinions and the mere fact of my existence. I spent the first eighteen years of my life being told I was inconvenient. Yet another point of overidentification with Gideon.

But in case anybody still thinks that Nona proves that Gideon was an asshole all along, think about all of the above. Think about how it would make you feel to come back from not just death but from the erasure of your existence, something you chose in order to save the life of someone you loved, and be told that you’re inconvenient. Think about how you’d feel if you’d been told all your life that it would be better for everyone if you didn’t exist. And then tell me that Kiriona isn’t in the right and that I should give a rat’s ass what happens to literally anybody else.

It’s Kiriona Hours up in this House, butches. We’ve spent long enough caring about people who would prefer we weren’t around. For once in our entire lives we were told we were important; we were told we mattered; we were told we were the main character. We were going to, if not get the girl and save the world, at least get to do something real, something important, something like being the hero.

But that’s over now; we’re back to being wrong and bad and inconvenient thanks to the simple fact of our existence. So it’s time to embrace it. Let’s be a little shit. Let’s be kind of a dick. Let’s have our own agenda, let’s play our cards close to our heartless chest, let’s allow our circle of empathy to contract to ourselves and maybe one more person. That’s where I’m at right now. And I don’t see that changing anytime soon.

[luminique]

okay guys. after a *checks the time* 10 hour school day, i was finally able to watch harumasa’s character demo and all i can say is that i have a few thoughts.

the bird we see in the beginning is a sign of an ethereal. it also symbolizes him in a sense, white feathers, very bright yellow eyes. the young boy we hear in the beginning is most definitely younger harumasa. the bird kept watch of him before flying away, making him wake up.

we find out that he has two scars? holes? on the side of his neck and his choker is used a cover. he fears he’d turn into an ethereal and relies on medication to keep himself in check.

it seems that he was heavily tested on as a child, as the only time the testing failed was when he was younger. this caused him to be shot in the neck to regain control over himself. this is also the only time we ever see him have heterochromia eye color (maybe his eyes turn a different color if he becomes an ethereal)

he wakes up again after having another nightmare of his past. it’s clear that he can’t just easily ignore the fact that he can become an ethereal, hence why his story states that it is a secret he holds within him that he cannot get over or leave behind. the mirror shatters and a flock of white birds with yellow eyes come flying right towards him but you can see that they carry the same green color as ethereals.

remember the bird in the beginning? maybe instead of flying away, it was flying towards the young boy. just like how harumasa was slowly walking towards the boy at the end and in his eyes, was slowly turning into an ethereal.

yeah thats it. i think i just stated like supremely obvious things but i look forward to finding out more about him. also his birthday is july 18th i think YIPEE HIM AND I ARE BOTH JULY BABIES

[topaz-carbuncle]

"To be loved is to be known" is a quote that I've been thinking about a lot recently, especially when it comes to how well that quote can work with garrus and Shepard's relationship. Both platonically and romantically.

Even before his romance, from the moment you recruit garrus, he's checking up on Shepard without any prompting. "Frankly, i'm more worried about you. Cerberus, Shepard?" He knows that Shepard wouldn't be working with them without a damn good reason, so he accepts whatever reason Shep has, instead choosing to voice his worries and rejoin Shepard as if those 2 years never happened. He trusts shepard enough to join a potentially dangerous workplace, knowing shepard would not allow anything to happen to him.

Not to mention that Shepard didn't exactly get to officially ask Garrus to join the crew, he just woke up in a new Normandy med bay and they both knew he would be there until the end. No Shepard without Vakarian, and all.

In mass effect 3, regardless of romance or bro/femshep, Garrus is the one to get Shepard to rest after Tuchanka. He knows that besides Earth, losing Mordin was the first personal hit that Shepard has taken since the war started. Being a pessimist, he is also more than aware that it won't be the last and that there's only so much that platitudes can do. So he does what he can, reassuring Shepard that he will keep an eye on things (unromanced) and will wake her (romanced) if anything happens. He knows the stress and burden that's been placed on her, so he does what he can to lessen it just enough to get a few hours of sleep.

My personal favourite romance scene in the 3rd game is the conversation with him after Thessia, despite Shepard's worsening mood when speaking to the crew post-mission, he continues as normal. He doesn't make a huge deal out of the mission and instead, Shepard is met with relief with the news about his family, critical thinking when discussing the call he made, then sharing her own thoughts before allowing herself to receive his comfort.

Garrus knows what Shepard needs in these circumstances, he's always there to give her the truth as well as to reassure her. "But humans want to save everyone. In this war, that's not going to happen." , "I tend to expect the worst, anyway." and "Before a certain turian with no romantic skills to speak of tries to cheer you up?"

He doesn't sugarcoat his thoughts, he doesn't downplay anything for her sake because he knows she needs someone to be that rock for her.

It goes both ways as well, especially if you view the outcomes of Garrus' loyalty as Shepard acting on behalf of what Garrus will need vs what he wants if you talk him down from taking the shot. Shepard knows that Garrus is standing on a thin line between getting justice for his team or acting out of revenge. She knows that shooting sidonis won't undo the hurt and will just be another body piled on top of it all, this time the blood actually being on his hands.

Or, if you prefer the renegade path, Shepard knows that Garrus needs to take out the final thing keeping him tied to Omega. That Garrus needs his team to be avenged so that he can stop carrying those souls with him and finally put them to rest.

It's such a brief discussion, but after recruiting him in me3, shepard is also very quick to ask about his family and then reassure him that they will be okay. After everything they have been through (not even just with the reapers) and all the losses they have collectively endured, she still doesn't hesitate to comfort him when it comes to his family.

I just love these two and their relationship so much

[silverview]

"I think we have got some sort of insight into it. Without just thinking, Oh, these people are mad. And they love something too much."

[milkayart]

a friend said estinien would be esko in finnish so

[doloneia]

as an academic i believe every lost greek epic is a tragic loss of valuable material that could have provided modern scholars an immense amount of insight into homeric tradition. however as an odysseus enjoyer, i think the telegony was kinda cringe and ooc

[ruvviks]

The Dobrynin family is a corpo family through and through, rooted in Arasaka and Orbital Air going back by several generations; though their powerful position within the corporate world ends with the children of Nadya and Matvey Dobrynin. With Vitali and Daniil fired from Arasaka and Kang Tao respectively— the former indirectly getting his parents fired, too— and Roksana having refused to set foot within a megacorporation from the start, the family begins crumbling apart at the very seams when clashing interests lead to grudges, betrayal, and pointless acts of revenge. ↳ read the unrevised fic here if you're interested!

taglist (opt in/out)

@shellibisshe, @florbelles, @ncytiri, @roseeway, @stars-of-the-heart;

@lestatlioncunt, @katsigian, @radioactiveshitstorm, @estevnys, @adelaidedrubman;

@celticwoman, @rindemption, @carlosoliveiraa, @noirapocalypto, @dickytwister;

@killerspinal, @euryalex, @ri-a-rose, @velocitic, @thedeadthree;

@kanos, @swordcoasts, @ordinarymaine, @claudiawolf, @strafethesesinners

[al-luviec]

For requests: could you draw TimeShadows (Krux x master of shadow)?? Pls!!! 🥺👀

running away with my head in my hands

[lovesickeros]

lord its so dark in here the sahara desert of tsaritsa content you are like a shining oasis. your characterisation of her compels me & mihoyo would be hard pressed to top it imo.!! caaaaan i humbly request yr thoughts on her first meeting w a reader of any kind, or maybe even multiple kinds (sagau, sagau god au, isekai, etc) if you so desire...

it really is like a desert here. being the fan of a character we aren't getting until the last damn nation is driving me up a wall but i will persevere bc if nothing else i support morally bankrupt women in media. we r in a severe drought over here but i do my best. unfortunately nothing i say is ever coherent so pull out your translation notes its abt 2 be messy

also this got out of hand but thats bc first meetings w the tsaritsa are tricky to write + a LOT of her characterization lies in deeper exploration then just surface level yknow...NOT A DIG AT YOU this is just my excuse for rambling. gently pats the tsaritsa she can hold so much complexity i do not have the word count to delve into it completely :]

gonna talk cult au for a bit here though because that's 99% of my content. and honestly? she thrives in sub au's of the cult au like villain au + imposter au. it's basically made for her. i mean, early days, the imposter au had been going around for a little while but one of the first few ideas was the Fatui taking reader in so like. it kinda technically actually was. pretty sure cult au Tsaritsa popped up because of the imposter au. a lot of it's writers kinda left though which. man am i getting old or.

anyway.

there isn't much of a chance her first impression is all that positive. at best it's usually neutral, imo, but rarely if ever positive. specifically because i view the Tsaritsa as someone who isn't as fanatical as most of the acolytes typically are towards the creator. she's not exactly going to worship the ground you walk on unlike a certain geo lizard. which is partially why i think she thrives in the sub au's i mentioned.

imposter au, for example. she meets you at your lowest. there's no gaudy extravagance or pampering from the acolytes waiting for you because your own acolytes have turned on you. for all intents and purposes you aren't a "god" at all. which is why i don't think she meshes well with normal cult au reader. the Fatui are made up of outcasts, basically, and imposter au slots right in just perfectly. you're weak, at your lowest, when you meet the Fatui in the imposter au. and the Fatui can help you, too.

a mutual exchange, really. the Tsaritsa sees a tool she can use to one up the rest of the nations and especially Archons, and she has no qualms about you using her and the Fatui in turn. you both want something out of it, after all. whether you just want to be safe from the rest of the acolytes, or you want revenge, or whatever else..she'll give you the power to fulfill it, and she gains the strongest piece on the chessboard when all is said and done.

the best way i can describe the first meeting is "practical", i suppose. she sees an opportunity in you. the ultimate gamble. because if she "saves" you, and you dont trust anyone else because they tried to kill you, well..she holds all the cards, doesn't she?

but the Tsaritsa, imo, is just as capable of being just as fanatical towards you as anyone else. she just won't worship you as the creator. but as yourself? clawing your way back to your divine power and taking back what belongs to you? the Tsaritsa is, to me, a character who's character flourishes in long-term fics more because she changes a LOT between "just met reader" and after having been with reader for some time. she's practically apathetic at the beginning but a lot of her character, in my characterization, shines through LONG after the first meeting.

[theofficialdobsmith]

I've realized that a lot of people coming into Whitepine haven't watched Kaboodle SMP. And that's FINE, it's not like it's required reading or cannon to Whitepine(?) However, as someone who participated in KSMP while it was happening there is an important message I must share.

PLEAS.

FOR THE SAKE OF THE TIMELINE.

DO NOT SHIP PYVORY.

YOU GUYS HAVE TO TRUST ME.

[widogasted]

so hyperfixated that i'm shouting at 10am about custody agreements. in an anime

[lilacerull0]

average dylanlila.tumblr.com rant be like, but putting that aside for a moment i need to note how special it is that lila gets hung up on beckett of all writers... beckett whose theatre is anti-theatre and beckett who ridicules the supposed shape of things and pokes holes in concepts we all accept as normal without a second thought. this is how lila cerullo functions. she's the embodiment of absurdist theatre. elena tries to fit her into a classic story with a beginning and an end and proper chapters, but lila, much like an absurdist play, challenges structure of these things and refuses to fit the pages. there is no well-made novel because there are no well-made people. lila doesn't enter elena's computer to rewrite the story, but she does give it a cyclic absurdist element by sending elena the dolls which mark the beginning of their journey.

lila doesn't approve of seeing what beckett does as absurdism for the sake of absurdism... "it's something that suggests a thousand more" is a statement that exists in direct opposition to viewing human life as meaningless. what she's saying here more closely resembles an existentialist viewpoint where an unlikely or shocking thing can be the key to living authentically if we are capable of giving it meaning. lila of course is scared of the intensity of her senses so she figures the secret of life must be in reducing senses to a minimum or even better: eliminating them entirely. it's as shocking as camus suggesting that sisyphus might have enjoyed his punishment. what i am trying to say in the most incoherent manner imaginable is that lila exists as someone who doesn't fit within the very nature of life (or so she's made to believe) so for her to read about how maybe that life which supposedly doesn't have a place for her might not be what she's been taught to belive it is comes as a relief? source of fascination? so that night where she experienced dissolving boundaries for the first time exists in written word and isn't limited to her head? idk... it's just cool to me how she's introduced to a writer who doubts the very structure of everything when she herself struggles with the architecture of life and the shape of things so profoundly...

[melodyofthevoid]

that victor design lowkey looks like your prince oc tho

...

oh god

...fuck

[halamshiral]

the more i think about it the more it bothers me that the fandom is taking for granted that since the south ends up the way it ends up each one of our choices in previous games is wiped out. but like, i don't get that??

yes, denerim is destroyed, but why should that imply that whoever i put on the throne is dead and the choice i made three games ago is null and void?? denerim has been destroyed before in the fifth blight, this didn't mean that everyone in the city was killed.

sure, kirkwall is destroyed too, but why that should mean that merrill fixing the eluvian doesn't matter?? maybe that's how they took people to safety??

the hero of ferelden not being mentioned doesn't sure as hell mean that they don't exist anymore or that they are not fighting. actually, considering they are not in weisshaupt, this gives us even more reason to believe that they are in the south doing what they always did (which is: whatever the fuck they want).

i've seen some people say that since the inquisitor's love interest doesn't mention the other da:i companions in the letter, then they are obviously all dead. i'm sorry, but what the actual fuck???

i feel like if something is not explicitly said in the game people are just assuming the worst and i don't understand why. to me this should also be seen as a way to keep our headcanons intact, expecially where the warden and hawke are concerned, and a way from bioware to not force a hard canon on us. sure, it would have been AWESOME to have our previous choices influence somewhat the way things were going, but this doesn't mean they can't get brought up in future games. most da:o choices didn't matter in da2, aside from the useless 5 minutes cameos, but lots of them came back during da:i. why with veilguard it cannot be the same??

the vagueness to me feels like a way to allow that, in the face of a lack of time and resources for veilguard. maybe in future games, if we get to revisit southern thedas, they will actually pull some of those storylines back and go more in depth on what happened there.

i just don't get why in the meanwhile we all have to absolutely assume death and destruction for everything and everyone. you are just painting the picture way worse than it actually is. all because you're disappointed in your own expectations. but those were your own.