#thanks very much for noticing
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At the end of my latest TLT reread and it’s been physically painful attempting to read the last 40+ pages of Nona. Like, the short shrift that Gideon/Kiriona gets given by the people in the story…the theoretical good guys who honestly only see her as a thing, as a means to an end with an inconvenient dead soul attached to it… It makes me want to rip my own heart out of my chest.
Nobody has cared about Gideon her whole life. Most people, in fact, if they remembered about her at all, went out of their way to tell her how much they wished she didn’t exist. In the final chapters of Gideon, she finally gets the thing she’s been desperate for her whole life: somebody telling her that they need her, they care that she exists, and they badly want her to go on doing it. This allows her to make peace with the prospect that at the ripe old age of 18, she needs to die so that that person can go on living and living and living, using the castrated remnants of her soul as fuel to do so. Not a great way to go, but at least Gideon would get to be useful to somebody, would get to be remembered for something.
And then she wakes up in the wrong body, and finds out that her sacrifice - her attempt to be useful in the most selfless way possible, in that her self will no longer exist - has been rejected. And not only that, but the person she tried to give herself to - the one who was supposed to care about her - went to extreme lengths to make completely sure that she no longer remembered about Gideon.
She literally cut Gideon out of her brain.
And now, drifting along in the worst sort of half life where she’s inhabiting her body but it’s no longer really hers, in very obvious fashion - there’s holes in it, her heart is missing, and it’s got her shitty father’s handprints all over it (not even touching how much of a violation that is), indelibly - she finally meets back up with the small group of people who could theoretically be relied upon to be glad to see her again.
But then the one who was supposed to care about her most tries to kiss her (massively OOC for Harrow), and turns out to not even be there - it’s some weird baby inhabiting her body, and doing a really shit job of it too. The rest of them won’t stop talking about how they need her to break into the Tomb - as if she was just another key, same as the ones they worked together to acquire in Canaan House, just bigger and more inconvenient - and/or how they both fucked and killed her mom, who also (surprise, surprise) wished that Gideon had never existed, but saw her as a thing that needed to be done for the good of the mission.
Ultimately, they all make it abundantly clear - Palamedes, Camilla, Pyrrha, and especially Nona, all these people who are supposed to be kind and good and right - that they would prefer she wasn’t there. That it just be her body, with no Gideon attached - at least not Gideon the way she is now, broken and rejected and miserable. They would all far have preferred that she not have her own inconvenient thoughts and feelings and desires and impulses - that she just be inanimate and let the important people, the grown ups, get things done.
They wish she didn’t exist. Same as everybody else in her life, save one, and now she’s left wondering whether Harrow really meant it at all. Because if she did, she wouldn’t have left Gideon to Kiriona’s fate.
And honestly? Really, truly? I know everybody in the fandom loves Pal and Cam and Nona and Pyrrha, but in the end I couldn’t give less of a shit about them. They are fucking side characters, and as intriguing as Nona has been from a worldbuilding standpoint, I ultimately resent having been forced to read 400+ pages of filler bullshit about fucking side characters. I am a butch, and I’m here for my sarcastic, loving, angry, vulnerable, forgiving, and yes, inconvenient sword butch. I’m here for Gideon. But Gideon has been fridged for the last two books of the series in which she is supposed to be a, if not the, main character.
And it feels like almost nobody else in the fandom feels the same way, which, fine. I’m used to that. I’m also used to being told I’m projecting; and I’m used to being told that I’m inconvenient too, in my thoughts and my opinions and the mere fact of my existence. I spent the first eighteen years of my life being told I was inconvenient. Yet another point of overidentification with Gideon.
But in case anybody still thinks that Nona proves that Gideon was an asshole all along, think about all of the above. Think about how it would make you feel to come back from not just death but from the erasure of your existence, something you chose in order to save the life of someone you loved, and be told that you’re inconvenient. Think about how you’d feel if you’d been told all your life that it would be better for everyone if you didn’t exist. And then tell me that Kiriona isn’t in the right and that I should give a rat’s ass what happens to literally anybody else.
It’s Kiriona Hours up in this House, butches. We’ve spent long enough caring about people who would prefer we weren’t around. For once in our entire lives we were told we were important; we were told we mattered; we were told we were the main character. We were going to, if not get the girl and save the world, at least get to do something real, something important, something like being the hero.
But that’s over now; we’re back to being wrong and bad and inconvenient thanks to the simple fact of our existence. So it’s time to embrace it. Let’s be a little shit. Let’s be kind of a dick. Let’s have our own agenda, let’s play our cards close to our heartless chest, let’s allow our circle of empathy to contract to ourselves and maybe one more person. That’s where I’m at right now. And I don’t see that changing anytime soon.
#the locked tomb#kiriona gaia#harrowhark nonagesimus#griddlehark#gideon nav#gideon the ninth#harrow the ninth#nona the ninth#sorry if this makes 0 sense#but also sorry not sorry bc I don’t care#and neither do you if you’re being honest with yourself#go enjoy thinking about your little masc Lyctor fusion and leave me alone to not rot when I’m supposed to#and why yes I do need therapy#thanks very much for noticing#if you feel like paying for it and the hours I’d miss going to it here’s my cashapp#$fuckoff-2024#also just to get out in front of these#yes I should just go read something else#but 1. you and I both know this series changes your brain chemistry so good fucking luck#and 2. point me at a book where the butch gets to be in the spotlight and I will gladly fuck off forever
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Bunnydoll brainrot incoming
Edit: The first image was an inspiration from a fic called " Things Worth Surviving For" by CanterburyBell. I just realized I misspelled it on the image jrndkso
#myart#tadc#the amazing digital circus#tadc jax#tadc ragatha#bunnydoll#jax x ragatha#ragatha x jax#doing this in lnbetween comms ayooo#first image was inspired by a fic title on image#go read it iz good#i applaud all bunnydoll writers your feeding me#thank you very much#i just notice the name of the writer for the fic is wrong#its supposed to be CanterburyBell#forgive me its 2 am hdbsksi
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big fan of doc roe
++ silly doodles
#eugene roe#band of brothers#i think lots of thoughts about eugene gene doc roe#he's such a guy im a big fan#band of brothers fanart#guyz...... the angel comparisons..... cathedrals..... religion.....i love his whole Theme#++baberoe doodles#baberoe#click for better quality#omfg#didnt expect my first baberoe fanart on here to get noticed so much thank u all#:'))#u r all very sweet
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I tried to draw sheep Machete and goat Vasco (but I am not good at drawing goats, at all)
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#Macsheep and Goatsco#what do you mean I LOVE goat Vasco#the ears! the hejazi goat ears!#and his expression is just *chef's kiss* perfect#really captures that ungovernable goatlike glee#I like how he retained his smooth coat and sleek and curved shapes#and Machete looks very appropriate as a sheep as well#he would have even more reason to trim his neck wool as a sheep#come to think of it would he have to keep himself sheared at all times if he wanted his clothes to fit correctly?#and just keep the head fluff#I noticed that you paid attention to their snout shapes! sheep have kind of rabbitlike nose whereas goats have a smoother upper lip#with less prominent philtrum#I thought that was such a cool detail#something I often forget myself when I'm drawing these species#thank you!#gift art#arttsuka#Machete#Vasco#it's weird how much harder their expressions are to read solely because of the horizontal pupils#they're mammalian but lack that anthropomorphic familiarity I guess
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In Regards To Your 2024 Summary:
Holy shit it’s been another year????? The hell?????
Also! Your art style is gorgeous and that being found in 2023 and then refined throughout late 2023 and the entirety of 2024 really shows, as does your growth in panel layouts, perspective, and — as you said — experimentation. If you ever post your animation or video game art I’m looking forward to it.
As cheesy as it sounds, being able to laugh at funny comics and look at all the details of your art really made my 2024 brighter, even when things were hard. Including looking at your older art— it doesn’t need to be new to be enjoyable! I’m glad your art is well loved and it’s a privilege to have been here since the (near) beginning. I hope you take care of yourself in 2025 and beyond!
You and your art bring a lot of people a lot of joy never forget that <3
Thank you so much for keeping up with my art journey throughout these last two years! Two years!!! I am baffled at how that feels both too long and too short!
Admittedly, my art summary didn't manage to capture the fact that I did a lot of comic layouts that I'm really proud of. I also drew more backgrounds and made some very detailed works (*Dungeon Meshi spoilers for these examples*).
The growth is lot more evident when comparing my 'best' comics of 2023 to 2024:
Sometimes the growth is vertical, sometimes it is horizontal - and damn, sometimes it goes out of sight into the Z-plane. But it is always happening!
#art summary#ask#The privilege is honestly mine; to be able to create comics and have had people rooting me on since the beginning really means a lot.#To everyone who the potential I couldn't and continues to stick around: Thank you so very much.#I cannot emphasize enough that I do see you. I do notice those who regularly like/reblog/comment.#I notice when people who haven't been around come back and mass like/reblog posts.#There are some people who have only *ever* liked my posts or have only ever lurked! I notice! I am so thankful!#At the risk of also sounding cheesy; I'm honestly happy to give back whatever I can to my audience.#Knowing I have brought people a little bit of joy to their day with my silly comics makes every long night worth it.#I probably make a longer post about it in the future; but last year when I made my first comic redraw-#-was the same day I got the news that someone very beloved to me passed away. I was in such deep grief I couldn't respond to comments.#But I still read them and I mean this earnestly; even though I was smiling through tears -#everyone's kind words truly helped make a pretty dark month a lot brighter. I probably would have crumbled without the support.#What really gets me is this: it was never directed at trying to cheer me up. It was just earnest kindness towards a stranger making comics.#If you've ever wondered 'hey does PD-MDZS know how much I appreciate their silly comics?'#know I have also sat here and thought 'Hey does this person know how much I appreciate seeing them in my notifications?'#Which also includes you! Mina BNHA you will always be associated with the cool person who's been rooting for me B*)#I wish everyone a wonderful new year; may all our creative endeavors be something we see as an exciting discovery.
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would morpho knight be eligible for the shipagaza 👀
ah, yes, it sure is! in fact,
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dancing with death seems like something she's a little too comfortable doing
*✩˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ valentines shipaganza masterpost ✩˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ ⋆˙⟡
#my art#my comics#starstruck dee#morpho#morpho knight#🎀💖#🎀🔍#WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE i was actually waiting all last year for someone to ask this one#(i did get one but it was after february and i'd burnt out a bit! but thank you!!! 💖)#morphostruck was actually one of the only ones i knew going into this challenge was “canon”#and i knew the answer would be more classically 'romantic' than some of the others i've done#though i dunno if it's really a 'relationship' per say..... it knows her. notices when she's around. is that enough?#morpho is very much a Thing to me. an IDK spectre of a creature. it's not real and it's everything at once. hope that helps.#anyway! dance with death//kiss of death puns are happening here!!#full comic jump scare!! morpho's been getting all the goods lately actually
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This came to me earlier, and now I am utterly obsessed: While it was clear to me that Odysseus stabbing Poseidon wasn't any kind of Vengeance, there was one act of Vengeance after all, even if inadvertent—it was Odysseus disproving Poseidon's "Ruthlessness is mercy upon ourselves" belief right in front of his very eyes. With him as the subject, even.
Think about it—the fact that Poseidon remained ruthless and insisted on punishing Odysseus was the only reason he got stabbed repeatedly. If Poseidon had been merciful, if he had accepted Odysseus' offer of forgiveness, he would've been fine. His own ruthlessness backfired so hard on him this time that I am sincerely hoping it haunts him forever.
I am actually utterly obsessed with Poseidon thinking back to Odysseus "Maybe you could learn to forgive?" on a daily, no an hourly basis. I cannot and will not lie to you that is unironically my favorite moment in the whole Vengeance saga just because of what it says about both the characters—about Odysseus for offering and Poseidon for declining (and also because Odysseus sings it in Poseidon's own motif which is just absolutely brilliant.) And this makes me love it even more.
Poseidon was going to decline, we all know that. I don't think anyone watching—even Odysseus, probably—expected him to accept. But then I'm picturing him lying there, bleeding into the stone, and, against his will, wondering whether maybe he should have. Maybe if he had, he wouldn't be in pain. Maybe if he had not killed Odysseus' fleet ten years ago, he wouldn't be in pain either. Maybe this one time ruthlessness wasn't mercy upon himself—maybe this time, his one grand belief was wrong. Maybe ... it was always wrong.
Obviously, he would never admit to these thoughts, he would slap himself for having them one second later. But I simply need this self-proclaimed god of ruthlessness to be utterly haunted by that and question whether he made the right choice or no—whether he's even lived by the correct philosophy all his immortal life—and no matter what, be too stubborn to admit he was wrong.
He's trying to pretend like nothing changed, but the thoughts still remain. They pester him. They won't leave him alone. Especially every time someone—anyone—is kind to him for whatever reason, they come crashing back into him and they won't leave.
"What if my own ruthlessness hurt me that time?"
"What if ruthlessness isn't mercy upon ourselves after all?"
"What if I'm wrong?"
"What if I have always been wrong?"
The most dreadful thoughts imaginable to a god as proud and stubborn and old as Poseidon, but they're there now and he can't do anything about them. You all don't understand how much I NEED this god to jolt up in his bed at 3 am after having a dream or nightmare about something related to one of his many ruthless deeds (maybe even sinking Odysseus' fleet) and go "BUT WHAT IF I HAD LEARNED TO FORGIVE?? WHAT IF I STILL COULD??" only to immediately slap himself for it because that's absolutely ridiculous.
He is left to watch this belief shatter before his very eyes as he's clinging to the remains of it desperately, trying to keep it all from crumbling. Not because he genuinely believes he's right anymore, but because he simply cannot imagine ... does not know how to live by any other philosophy.
No matter whether it's objectively correct or not, it's the very thing that defines him. The thing he's known for. He has built his entire image around this, he cannot give it up no matter what ... at least not quickly or without help.
But as much he would seek to deny it, his core belief has now been proven wrong; he has actually lived through an instance where it was wrong, and he can do nothing to erase those memories or conclusions from his mind no matter how much he yearns to go back to simpler times.
And that was the real Vengeance, guys—possibly the biggest, most painful existential crisis of Poseidon's immortal life. I rest my case.
Although before I disappear back into the void I simply must give a shout out to @o3o-lapd-o3o (this came to me during a conversation in one of their comment sections for the glorious Friends In Higher Places AU, which is quite possibly my favorite piece of EPIC fan content that exists ...)
#poseidon epic#epic the musical#epic musical#epic the vengeance saga#epic odysseus#poseidon#jorge rivera herrans#i have never believed in ruthlessness is mercy#but thank you so much odysseus for proving me right#with ruthlessness of your own#how very poetic#poseidon having an existential crisis over being too stubborn for redemption is sth i didnt know i needed#i wanna believe he gets there eventually#a few centuries later#odysseus has no idea what he did btw#he stabbed poseidon and that was that#he probably didnt think he could so much as make him question this#someone somewhere out there eventually notices maybe#HAVE I MENTIONED HOW OBSESSED I AM WITH ODYSSEUS' “MAYBE YOU COULD LEARN TO FORGIVE?” YET#because I AM#that god killed your whole fleet#thunder saga!odysseus would not have offered this#i love the subtle hints at odysseus' positive development in this saga almost more than anything#the only thing I don't love about them is that they're so subtle a majority of people don't notice them#friends in higher places au?#am i allowed to tag this as that ouo#epicssay
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Your novel excerpts are incredible and I would love to see more. The warmth and care you put into it shines through and I just want more of it!
On a side note, incredibly unfair that you can draw AND write so masterfully. A true power house, haha.
aaAAAAA THANK YOU SO MUCH :'DDD
as a treat you can have some more akdffd
if the main plot is 'Fantasy Murder Mystery' then the biggest subplot is probably 'Snow is Not Doing Well'
#ramble#book writing stuff#this is such a compliment thank you so much <33333#i could probably make a separate book out of just 'snow being very mentally unhealthy'#i think snow was a lot less sad when i started writing this a year ago lmao#i really dislike 'the protagonist is the special chosen one who is better than everyone else and has no flaws and always looks hot' akdfhdf#what if he was just a pathetic little guy though#i was going to do love triangle with my protagonists then i went to polycule and then eventually just found family#sometimes you're just not supposed to be in a relationship y'know. they've got other priorities like not being executed#ignore any errors i never notice everything until someone else reads it
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Hi! I hope that you are doing well🥰💗💕 I really adore your art!! Your Yuu really wins me over to the very heart!💘💘💘
I wear lightning-shaped earrings and they really remind me of Sebek!⚡ I would like your girl to put them on and draw this🥺💓
But I also really love her black earrings that she wears when she's a teenager and green ones when she's an adult! It's really cute💕💕
And! I would be interested to know if Sebek notices when Yuu puts on other earrings or doesn't wear them at all if she doesn't want to?👉👈💗
Have a nice day!🥰❣️❣️❣️
decide ur ending, which feels more in character
#for me#awwee i was so giddy when i saw that i got another picture#but it's 12:56 AM and i exhausted myself thinking which way should it go#twisted wonderland#twst#sebek zigvolt#jack howl#ace trappola#deuce spade#twst yuu#twst mc#i mean i think he would notice right away if he did have a look at yuu since her hair is short it's hard for the earrings to hide#but then he might be too busy on study and daily duty of tunnel visioning on malmal and he is from different class too so#by public seduction he means seducing him publicly#here yuu smiling for that anon who once asked for smiling yuu#fanart#also thank you very much the positive energy this ask and the many emojis gave me#the written detail of the earring phase makes me feel very appreciated as well thank you#also i have been receiving several really nice asks recently#thank you very much for those too people who know they sent them#anyhow sebek this becomes public the moment u yell about it for the whole world to hear
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Why not enjoy the view together?
#manspreading diluc haunts my dreams he’s just so large and beefy thanks for indulging with me#life is still really busy and i’m always tired so sorry for not being on here much#i mean to get to my asks soon i’m very dogshit at this if you haven’t noticed#someone very kind gave me a generous tip on kofi to finish the sketch to this painting so how could i now#not*#diluc#my art#genshin impact#genshin#diluc ragnvindr#diluc fanart
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Some lost sister designs for you while im battling my art block <3
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i read somewhere that Jennika was trapped in some alternate dimension, i can't remember where though. But its cannon in my heart anyways
Frida is a red eared slider and Jennika is some kind of snapper -a smaller species than Raph is.
#Frida is tallllll#and very distinguished#Jennika though?#chaos#will try and eat anything#Raph forbids her from giving Mikey tattoos#little does he know she already did but he just hasnt noticed cause theyre too small#She and Mikey are artists buddies#Donnie have feeling about Fridas face markings#they look too much like eyebrows#and that is his brand ™️ thank you very much#rottmnt#rottmnt frida#rottmnt jennika#rottmnt big mamas assistant
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Tommorow i'm starting school 💀 i wanna explode. Hopefully this won't mean i'll stop drawing,, Here's a few finished arts in the meantime :]
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{I draw mario so different everytime help 💀 Also luigi is pretty hard to draw so i'm still figuring him out ✌}
#art#my art#ender's tag#super mario#mario#luigi#mugman#also since last post i noticed some folks who i ADORE their art and writing liked my last drawing and i'm just🧍♀️#SO HAPPY LIKE WHAT#some of you guys are very very talented i just didn't answer anything bc i thought it would've been awkward 💀#BUT LIKE I'M SO HAPPY THANKS SM :'D#i'm way too shy to interact with others so yeah but it rlly means a lot to me ♡ every like every reblog rlly#i also do have an oc/s/i of mario but i haven't posted her yet. but i will {hopefully} soon :3#{not posting much like i used to bc it my main focus anymore basically but i'm so happy whenever someone likes my dogshit art/gen}#ALRIGHT ENOUGH WITH THE YAPPING NOW 💋💋
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beautiful pfp I aprove /vpos
Thank you.
it’s called 2 yaoi killers. (me who doesn’t know what yaoi is (no don’t explain it))
#mitsuasks#mitsusart#anon#<3#killer sans#killer x killer#something new au#undertale au#undertale#sans undertale#au undertale#art#sans#i was hoping no one noticed#but thank you very much#👍
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They're so lovely, your Honour. Dadmare is king, his boys forever goofy. I refuse to stop complimenting your art-
The one where Nightmare, he HIGHLIGHTED concerning lyrics that he PRINTED OUT to show CROSS. It's so wholesome- he's such a dad and I love it. I love your art, it's so sweet. I love it.
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Asdbkjbfjk STOP I'M GOING TO DIE hello 911 somebody's being nice to me on the internet help
Thank you!! <3 You are FAR too kind, I am sending 1 million good vibes directly to your home as revenge >:3c
He just worries! He wants his sons- I mean boys- I MEAN UNDERLINGS to be happy and when he hears one of them absolutely wailing about feeling numb and disappointed he wants to check in. Also he finally learned to use the printer without help and he's taking advantage of it.
It's also important to note this is all Pigeon's fault for having such amazing cool ideas and going feral with me about them, which is how we get things like this
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Smooth.
#UTDR#UTMV#Ask#Thelunarsystemwrites#Pigeonstab#Tagging you because you're responsible for this motivation!!#But for reals alhdgdkks thank you so much!! This was way too nice it made me squeak when I read it <3#Also these are so messy I'm sorry#I just really badly wanted to draw something for this#And with tonight's thoughts I was inspired#Don't notice that I forgot my own tattoos in that first drawing#Genuinely hearing that I make the boys goofy is such a high compliment to me#I am always striving for goofy so thank you very much <3#Okay now I need to sleep for reals goodnight gang!!
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doing a social experiment poll for KH circles. answer to the best of your ability via the tags/replies
Including the DLC, did you like Kingdom Hearts 3's story, gameplay, both or neither?
Then, what YEAR (or window of time) did you get into Kingdom Hearts as a franchise and genuinely start playing through the games?
#kingdom hearts#stormy weather#if you cant remember the exact year give a window of time where you might've gotten into it#like between 2012 and 2014 for example#im just noticing a correlation between a lot of this information#for me personally i got into Kingdom Hearts back in 2008#and i am very divided about how much i liked or disliked kh3#but i think im an outlier#also edit to the tags#thank you for being respectful about this#i know the kh3 discourse is a huge point of contention#and i am not exempt from that#but just being able to say 'this was okay and this sucked' and leave it at that is very respectful thank u <3
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spoilers for alan wake 2-
one of my most recent cool findings has to be how the sound designers were literally constantly spoiling the main scratch-alan reveal from the very beginning. some1 on twitter first commented on how when profiling alan in saga's mind place u can hear the dark presence screeching when u hover over a question, but i also recently found out on my own that when u get to play as alan in return 4 - no chance u can hear fadeout whispers (from drowning monologue) every time u stop in a safe haven. the whispers can be heard in a circling motion around alan, and stop when casey gets attacked. possibly meaning that the fadeouts are also representative of scratch in some way, or just that alan's brought the dark place with him. god i love the little details like this
#alan wake#alan wake 2#alan wake 2 spoilers#alan wake (the man)#im very much an art direction and cinematography guy so thats what i noticed and loved abt the game first#but the more i learn abt and play it the more respect i have for the sound design like god. no other game goes this in depth#i love absurd amounts of detail even if most people will miss it. thank u remedy
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