#and one of them followed a common link between them out of the blue

[sarcastic-sue]

.

[extrajigs]

Wanted to figure out how chimera’s wrote and ended up starting on their written language proper. MASSIVE info dump below! 

Writing

They write using four fingers of one hand, usually the right, coated in ink. Think like a stamp almost. The three middle fingers draw with the tips of the teeth whilst the thumb will alternate between tip and back. All words are written simultaneously inward. The remaining fingers grip the source of ink, usually a length of hardened pigment only wetted on one side OR those who write often could invest in a pen. A pen for a chimera is a fanning brush saturated with ink that the writing teeth brush through when needing to reink. It allows for much faster wetting of the teeth, but can be messy when learning or refilling. 

Most chimera are right handed but left handed individuals exist, they will simply need to learn to use the two fingers opposite the middle in reverse of how someone who is right handed would! Luckily all fingers can move pretty independently of each other and it is an easy task.  As chimera mostly communicate through direct broadcast most find the written word lacking, so it is a common occupation among Chimera to write for others. It is an impressive skill to eloquently convey ideas/feelings through writing. Though their language set up lends to it MUCH more than others. 

The Nitty Gritty

All subject to change as this is very first drafty. 

Chimeric is a logographic language, there is no set alphabet and all ‘words’ stem from symbols representing things and ideas. Sentences are kind of two sentences atop one another, with one being the literal and the other the reactionary. It is read from out to in and sentences are written in a circle divided into 4 quarters. We’ll start with the top moving counter clockwise. 

Quarter 1 (Red) is the subject area, now subjects function the same as nouns for the most part, people, places, and things. But something important to note is that there must always be an ‘audience’ for the words being spoken. An audience basically means pronouns though they are a lot more encompassing with: I, You, Us, Them, Them excluding me/you, Us excluding you, Everyone, and a bunch of others. These are all acceptable audience subjects to top off your sentence. For instance you wouldn’t say “This pizza tastes good!” you would instead say “I enjoy the taste of this pizza” or “Everyone enjoys the taste of this pizza” the opinion/emotion needs to be applied to a source to make sense grammatically. 

Quarter 2 (Green) is all about emotions and opinions. Chimeric language is an exchange of ideas but also importantly emotions and feelings. Q2 is dedicated to how the sentence is supposed to be interpreted or felt by the reader, as obviously in ‘spoken’ chimeric speaker and listener technically feel the same about what is currently being said. Listener opinion is very distinct from speaker and in writing the speaker takes priority. So for example the statement “Who finished the box but left it in the pantry?” would instead have to be translated into something akin to “I am pissed and questioning who had the audacity to finish the box and did not care enough to remove it from the pantry thus leaving me to find it and become disappointed?” Basically chimeric lends itself to very long translations due to their feelings.  

Quarter 3 (Blue) is the action section of the sentence. The verbs if you will. This is where things are happening and is VERY tied in with Q1. Subjects in Q1 and Q2 will be linked together with lines that follow the same slice through the circle.

When a subject is linked to an action that means that the subject is the one performing the action, whereas subjects closer to the center and unaligned with an action are what is being acted upon. Like with the audience conundrum though an action needs a subject to actually act, whether it is an individual/s or an object or place. This is usually the least word heavy portion of the sentence as it is almost supplemental to Q1, and in contrast to the thin, crisp lines of the other quarters, Q3 will often be smudgey and more messy due to being written mostly with the back of the thumb. 

Quarter 4 (Yellow) is generally not going to have any words written there, as it functions as the anchor point for the hand. The outmost finger rests here on the page to stabilize the hand as it closes during writing. When writing in a ream of papers this is where the hole to hold them all together is punched through. However in modern fanciful writing styles Q4 is also used as a secondary emotional quarter. This style will use Q4 as the reactionary emotion of the reader, more so the expected reaction and emotion from the reader. This is an EXTREMELY class based writing style and it is a GIANT NO NO to write like this for someone of higher status to read. Typically only Clan heads will freely use this writing style, especially towards each other lmao. The writing style of the passive aggressive power struggle. 

All together Quarters are read at once! And I mean that there is no one word the chimera will start with. Every word of the sentence is absorbed at the same time, no following along a line like how I’m currently typing. But what indicates the order of which things are meant to be perceived is how close they are to the outside of the circle. Things closer to the center come later in the sentence and will be understood to be lower in the hierarchy of words. However only subjects and actions are directly linked to each other, emotion/opinion words are to have a more natural seep throughout the entirety of the sentence with only a loose idea of where they are to be felt. In this way while a subjects actions may be concrete, the writers feelings about them are more fluid and organic. 

Chimeric conlang yay! I wanted to make modern Mirum script but decided I needed to start at the roots. So technically two written languages originate from Mirum, but they are extremely similar with one directly branching from the other. Chimeric is the original and Miran is the derivative, they mostly share characters but their sentence structure is different. Chimeric keeps the circular structure whereas Miran is a zigzagging horizontal and completely drops quarters 2 and 4. Leading to modern Miran being a very literal language vs Chimeric’s emotion heavy focus. But if you know one you can pretty much read the other, albeit with some culture shock. 

[achaoticeternal]

nothing between us

aemond targaryen x reader part two - can’t you see...? ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ word count: 3.6k summary: under the influence of his mother, Aemond has followed the Faith of the Seven closely. The second son of the King is proud to meet a young noble Lady who shares the Faith as closely as he does.  a/n: there will be a part two :)  warnings: AFAB reader, theme of obsession, religious themes and guilt

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

“And may the Mother and Father watch over us as we walk in light…” The prayer rolled off your tongue with a finish. With a nod of your head, you finally rose from your spot at the altar.

The High Septon bid a dismissal as the halls of the sept began to clear. Your mother linked arms with you, serving as your guide through the crowd. She kept a warm smile on her face, nodding to both nobles and peasants alike. Though your father was just behind you, not showing the same warmth to the general public as your mother. 

You continued to follow out the doors, the sun shining brilliantly upon the capital. The light bounced off the blue waters, reflecting beautifully onto the shore. It had been either overcast or raining for the past week or so. But a day of sun was something you would truly thank the Mother for later. 

As you continued to be tugged along down the steps of the sept, your arms slipped out of your mother's, instead lifting up your skirt to be more diligent with your steps. In the courtyard below, merchants and spinsters began to announce their wears, bidding anyone who dared to take a look. Usually, they would be selling more exotic things than they would on any other day. 

With a giggle, your steps picked up as you tapped your mother on the shoulder, “We must stop by one of the book stands! I’ve read practically everything I can access in the prince’s and king’s library. A book from afar would be a welcome distraction!”

“You and your books…” Your father chuckled behind you, patting your back, “You’ll have to choose quickly, the Hand is summoning the Small Council to convene once that bell strikes two.”

With a nod, you picked up your steps, hoping to get to the book stand sooner. However, you were stuck behind a group of stragglers who cared to chat far more than they cared to walk. A sigh passed your lips as you continued trying to move around the group and reach your destination soon. You were able to press yourself against the wall in order to squeeze through the small gaps the group of elders made. When bumping past them, you whisper small apologies and pardons.

It isn’t until you are fully around the group of elders offering you small smiles that you are able to take large strides. You take the steps two at a time, hoping to beat the rush of the audience fleeing from the sept this morning. A smile spans across your face as you eye the end of the stairs, close enough that you feel the sparks of gratification stir inside. Accounting for the commoners surrounding you, your steps continue light and quick against the cobblestone. 

Yet what you did not account for was a mother and her two small children toddling next to her. The little girl drops her wood carving of a bear which tumbles down the stairs. As the toddler leans down to grab her belonging, you take a swift sidestep to avoid falling upon her or her mother. And just as quickly as relief passes through you, your foot dips into a small hole in the ground, causing your balance to unfavorably sway. Your hands can cling to nothing to keep you up and so you feel yourself free fall into the courtyard.

You brace yourself for an impact that never comes. Instead, two firm arms have caught you, saving you from any injury of landing so roughly.

“May the Seven bless you! Thank you,” The words spill from your lips as you regain your footing, standing to meet whoever has come to your aid. The breath exits your body as you meet, the violet eye of one Prince Aemond Targaryen. A dark cloak hangs over his shoulders, the hood pulled up most likely to hide his silver blond hair from straying eyes. If not for your somewhat familiarness with the royal family, you might have dismissed him as another stroller in the courtyard. Except you do recall seeing him and the Queen Mother, Alicent Hightower, observing the service in the sept just mere moments ago. The only other indicator to confirm that it is the Prince is the two King’s Guard that has joined his side, their shoulders relaxing when they recognize your noble appearance. 

“My-”

“My lady,” Aemond is quick to cut you off, clearly wishing not to be recognized, “May I ask where you were rushing off so quickly? It seems patience might not be among your virtues.”

Before you can properly answer him, you feel a hand on your shoulder -- your father who bows his head slightly in observance to the prince, “I apologize for my daughter’s clumsiness, ser.”

Aemond’s face remains stoic as he addresses your father, “All is well, my Lord. Perhaps we might thank the Seven that your daughter fell into my arms, rather than injuring herself or others on the abrasive ground.” 

A pause lingers for a moment as your father tries to find his next words. Should he thank the prince? Correct his daughter before the royal before him? Instead, you reply to the prince’s original question.

“There is a book stall that is only in the market once a moon with books from across the sea. I’ve almost read everything in the royal libraries, so I hoped to find a new text to read,” Your tone was polite, and kind when addressing the prince. You almost swore to the Mother that the corners of Aemond’s lips twitched into a smile before his disposition settled once more.

“Enjoy your noon then, I hear the Hand has summoned the small council and tends to busy them later” the Prince spoke with a nod, “my Lord, my Lady.” 

And just like that, the Prince and his guards have almost dissipated among the crowd. They are undoubtedly returning to the Red Keep, yet you wonder why the Prince did not join his mother in the royal carriage. But the thought leaves your mind just as quickly as your parents escort you to the book stand, not wishing for you to cause another scene.

--

The sun has fallen past midday and your father has long left you and your mother to attend the meeting in the Hand’s tower. While your Lord Father attended to work and the realm, you entertained your mother in one of the social dens of the Keep. Your mother was currently perched on a chair by the window, completing some needlework. In the chair opposite to her, there you sat with the religious text of the Faith in your lap. 

This was Sunday tradition, and even if your father could not be in attendance, you would not deny your obligation to thank the Seven for all they do for you, your family, and the realm. Though you knew nearly every passage by heart, your mother insisted you read so as not to be distracted from the outside temptations of the world.

But the book only kept your attention to a certain extent. Your mother was too enamored by her craft to notice when your eyes strayed from the pages and to the people that passed through the Keep. It was mainly guards going about their duties, and servants tending to wherever they must, but even Prince Aemond and Prince Aegon made a pass through. 

Both the Targaryen princes were walking in the direction of the Hand’s Tower. Most likely to participate in the Small Council meeting as a part of their royal duties. After living almost two moons in the castle, you noticed that the elder brother, Aegon, did not share the same satisfaction in performing his tasks as Aemond did. Once you swore that you watched Aemond nearly drag his brother to one of the council meetings, but you would never vocalize such. 

Here they were, the Targaryen princes, strolling through the corridor. Aegon was currently speaking but was too distant to make out what he quite said. You only assumed it to be a joke as he laughed while Aemond seemed less than entertained. But with a slight turn of his head, the younger prince caught sight of you, continuing your readings to your mother. He noted the book in your lap, familiar with it himself due to his time with his own mother, and offered you a nod. 

A moment later, the princes were gone. It was as if you had only imagined it, in fact, you could have convinced yourself the slight interaction had never happened. Except your mother spoke up when she noticed you had fallen silent, “Continue reading, dear.”

-- 

Days passed and with it, routine settled into place. Consistently socializing with the other nobles taking residence within the Keep, attending septa lessons, and continuing your residency in the library. However, a new commonality slithers into your routine. At least once a day, your path would cross with Prince Aemond, just briefly, but always the same gesture. Just a nod. 

You had anticipated today to be no different, spotting the prince earlier in the day. He had been sitting in the gardens with his beloved sister, Princess Helaena, as she cared for her collection of insects. Others would gossip of the princess’s peculiar curiosity, but you thought it endearing, almost divine, in how she cared for even the smallest of the Seven’s creatures. While you took station across the garden, Aemond gently passed back to his sister an arachnid one of the maesters had brought back from the citadel as a token to the princess. Once the creature was safely in Helaena’s palm, Aemond almost instantaneously caught your gaze. 

The impromptu action caused your breath to hitch in your throat. As always, you offered the Prince a nod of your head and a smile as a sign of respect. And as always, Aemond returned the nod. But then the corners of his mouth twitched upward as well, eyes locked on yours. It was the first time you had seen Aemond truly smile. 

Now that smile haunted your memory whilst sitting and attempting to read one of the new books your father recently purchased for you. It was some Braavosi epic that reached astounding popularity, yet now hardly held your attention. The poems bored you more than the Concise History of the Construction of Lemonwood. Taking the pendant of the Maiden between your fingers, you silently prayed to the Gods to rid these thoughts of the prince from your mind. Even as innocent as they were… you did not want temptation to come knocking at your door.

But the Gods speak in rhythm, or at least enjoy seeing mortals grovel, you thought as none other than Prince Aemond entered the library. He wore his usual dark tunic and trousers with a matching waistcoat and belt to cinch it all together. Even outside his training garbs, he reminded you firmly of the Warrior. 

Prince Aemond offered you a curt nod upon his entrance to the library before making his way over to a previously organized stack of books. Most of them were about the histories of Old Valyria with the occasional book on law and reform. It seemed Aemond was consistently studying as if that were his duty to the realm. Though you acknowledged that it was part of what was expected of him. 

Your focus finally returned back to your own novel when the Prince decided to claim your attention once more, “I have not seen that book in this library before.”

“Pardon me, my Prince?” You looked to him curiously, surprised at his observant eye.

“That book,” He gestured to your hand, “The binding is not only fresh but there is not a book in this library with a green cover and red stitching. That red stitching is not of Westeros either.”

You blinked a few times, absorbing this information, “You would be correct, my prince.”

“Then how did you come across such a book, my lady?” 

Swallowing your nerves, you continued the light conversation with the Prince, “My Lord Father bought it for me from a Braavosi merchant.”

“Mmm… if I recall, it was the same day you took that tumble,” He raised his brow.

“Yes, my Prince.” The day I tumbled into your arms.

“And, if my memory serves correctly, you made a sentiment on how you’ve already read through the titles in this library.”

“Yes, my prince.” You agreed once more, “All titles that I was permitted to read.”

“Permitted,” The word lingered on his tongue as if it were a curse, “I see.”

Silence fell over the library. You assumed it to be the end of your conversation with the prince. Minutes passed and you returned to your pages, mulling over the same lines for what felt like eons. That was until the prince called your attention once more.

“Who gives you permission as to what books you read?” There was something in his tone that you couldn’t quite place, but it stirred something within you.

“That would be my Lord Father,” You answered softly, “my prince.”

Then footsteps thudded across the floor. Aemond moved swiftly from his desk to stand before you instead. From your seat, you gazed up at the tall lean prince. In your current position, he towered over you and a warm hue of orange outlined his head from behind - as if he was carved from the perfected chisel and marble in the hand of the Seven. With ease, he took the epic from your hand and replaced it with a slightly heavier book. 

“At this time every day, I expect you to meet me in the library and read this to me,” Aemond instructed you.

Looking down, you took note of the title: Encounters of the Maiden and the Warrior.

“As you wish, my prince,” You nodded your head, “But I must ask my Lord Father for-”

“I am your prince,” Aemond interrupted, “Are direct orders from your prince not enough for you to do as you are told?”

You did not respond. Words were lost on you, and how could you correct him? He was right, in a sense… wasn’t he?

“Then the matter is settled,” He tilted his head, “Besides, your family mulls over religious texts quite often. This is simply a text to expand such education.”

Without another rise from yourself, you opened the book and began to read it to him. Aemond settled himself in a chair opposite of your own, fingers lightly tapping against the wood of the armrest. His expression gave away little of what he was thinking, so you simply continued.

The activity continued till the end of the moon. At first, you anticipated the meetings would only last till you finished reading the book aloud to him. But it shocked you one day when Aemond would instruct you to skip a few pages or even entire chapters. When you questioned him about this, he simply dismissed them as unnecessary to your divine education. He did not allow you to press the matter further. 

--

One evening, you joined your mother in your parents’ apartments after a visit to the Sept with your mother. Together, you had participated in your weekly prayers to the Mother and Maiden, lighting a candle for each. When you both returned, you recounted the trip to your father who had been too tied to his duties to participate. 

Dinner plans had been arranged for the families of Small Council members to have a private feast with the royal family. Typically, your family would pray in the godswood of the Keep before attending any supper, but tonight your parents thought it best to make an exception. 

Your mother had just finished pinning your hair when a knock fell upon the chamber door. Looking at your father, he answered the guest’s knock. 

There stood Prince Aemond, and his loyal King’s Guard, Ser Criston Cole. It was rare for a royal to come calling at a door. Quickly, you all rose to your feet, paying respects to the prince before you. While your father and mother offered him a nod, you honored the prince with a curtsy. 

“My Prince, why might we have the pleasure of your presence?” your Lord Father asked.

Aemond’s eye drifted over your form. He drank in the sight of you, prepared even if simply for a dinner with the King. His eye then adjusted back to looking your father in the eye.

“I have come to call upon the young Lady,” He stated simply, “I’d like to pray with her in the godswood before supper, under supervision, of course.” The prince gestured to Ser Cole who remained still. 

Warmth filled your cheeks and chest at the thought of being alone with the prince. It wasn’t your first time, of course, but each private moment with him brought over a wave of new emotions. 

Taking a moment to think, your father then nodded his head in agreement, “You have my permission.”

--

Ser Criston was notably trailing quite a few steps behind the prince and you as if he did not want to infringe upon the interaction. A part of your mind wondered if it was by order or out of the guard’s own consideration.

Aemond had led you from your parents’ apartments to just outside the garden wall. Your arm was carefully linked in his own, shoulders brushing against the other with each step. While you walked, you recounted your visit to the sept to the prince. He had not inquired, but you disdained any silence between you both and he did at least act amused. Amused as the prince would allow himself to be, at least. 

“And who gifted you your pendant of the Maiden?” The prince asked.

“My grandmother, before she passed,” you explained to him, “It was hers. A gift from my grandfather upon their betrothal.”

“I see,” He nodded, falling quiet once more. 

Before another word could be uttered, you arrived at the courtyard where the small godswood lay snug. Though you appreciated having a place to properly pray to the Seven nearby, your mind always trailed back to the godswood of your own ancestral home. It was considerably larger than this, or any of the Southern kingdoms. You never commented on the size though, not wanting to offend those who tended to it or sought comfort here. 

As Aemond led you forward, Ser Criston remained in the archway at attention. His eyes focused on the halls, surveying for harm as expected of him. 

Just as you approached the heart tree, Aemond stopped his moments, keeping you tucked into his side. Your eyes turned to his face, scanning his demeanor for a clue of what was in his mind.

Suddenly, he spoke once more, “My mother often comments on the fact that there is not a proper weirwood tree in the Red Keep’s godswood.”

After a pause, you offered him a response, “I believe I understand her sentiment.”

The prince turned toward you with a raised brow, dropping your arm in exchange for taking your hands in his own, “And what is that sentiment, my lady?’

Your eyes flicker over his face, the faintest hint of a smirk playing upon his lips. Tearing your gaze away from his face, you refocused down… down at his large hands which grasped your own. His cool, calloused hands nearly engulfed your own. Such thoughts sent a chill down your spine. The warm feeling returned, but you pushed away your acknowledgment of it. 

Taking a deep breath, you looked to where a weirwood tree might take occupancy in this godswood, “I do not wish to speak in ill opinion of the crown, my prince.”

“I want to hear your thoughts,” His hands squeezed your own, albeit gently, “Speak them.”

With a sigh, you continued as instructed, “Very few Targaryens, much less Targaryen Kings have truly devoted themselves to the Seven. The show of faith is merely a guise to appease the High Septon and common folk. As I’m sure you are well aware, it was always said that Targaryens are closer to Gods than men. Being compared to Gods does not ignite one to take up faith in what one might perceive themself as an equal to. So King’s Landing and many southern kingdoms are sullied with sin.”

Silence hung in the air, but the prince did not weaken his grip upon you. Worry sank in your stomach, wondering if you had spoken too freely for the prince’s liking. His common smirk played at his lips once more, “An observant lady… a very smart girl.”

The small praise made your heart drum against your chest, You could sweat to the Gods that he could feel it in your pulse too as he ducked his head closer to your own.

“My smart girl has been paying attention to our lessons,” His breath was warm against your face. His eye flickered from your own to the pendant resting atop your chest, “Good…”

Slowly, Aemond released one of your hands and raised his own up toward your face. His fingers took hold of the pendant, thumb grazing over the engraving. Then, he brought the pendant closer to his face, the tension of the chain against your neck, causing you to lean closer to him. His eye now held your gaze in a moment of surprising intimacy. Aemond raised the pendant to his lips, pressing a gentle kiss to it, eye never once leaving your own. 

When he released it, the pendant fell back upon your chest. You released the breath you didn’t even realize you were holding. 

“Now that I’ve given you my blessing,” Aemond’s voice was warm, but still caused your skin to prickle, “Get on your knees and pray…”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

[scotianostra]

May 17th is Norwegian Constitution Day or Syttende Mai as its known in Norway.

A wonderful spring holiday celebrated with red, white and blue ribbons, national costumes and waving of the Norwegian flag, the three colours are everywhere in Norway at this time of year.

It’s a day Norwegians all over the world take off to celebrate and marks the historic signing of the Constitution in 1814, the year Norway gained its independence from Sweden, which was fully realized in 1905.

In every city, town and village in Norway, children and adults alike express their cultural pride by marching to the bright music of school bands, celebrating the joy of springtime and honoring of those citizens who created Norway’s constitutional government, founding her independence.

Especially popular is the Children’s Procession that brings every child out in their best clothes or national costume.

In Edinburgh the Norwegian community celebrate Syttende Mai too.

Edinburgh’s celebrations include the Norwegian Scottish Society dinner, after a reception at the Norwegian Consulate’s residence.

Each year Norwegian students in Edinburgh hold a breakfast at Prestonfield House followed by a parade along Waterloo Place and onto Princes Street. At the boom of Edinburgh Castle’s One o’ clock gun, the pigeons fly and the parade begins!

Tonight expats and guests gather at The Royal Scots Club Abercromby Place for a celebration dinner held by the Norwegian Scottish Association. The association was founded in Edinburgh in 1966, and has enjoyed over 50 years of Norwegian-Scottish friendship.

Norwegian Scottish Association roots lie in a much older friendly society, one rooted in the shared experience of Norwegians and Scots during the Second World War. Founded in Dumfries in 1941, the Scottish Norwegian Society brought Scots and Norwegians together in difficult times. Having escaped the German occupation of their homeland in 1940, around a thousand Norwegians had come to be stationed at various times in Dumfries, and it was not long before the idea of a formal society was begun.

Of course our history with Norway goes back centuries, Northern Scotland, was, at one time, a Norse domain and the Northern Isles experienced the most long-lasting Norse influence. Almost half of the people on Shetland today have Viking ancestry, and around 30% of Orkney residents.

Many agree that there are many points of commonality between the Norse character and the Scottish one that leads to a sense of kinship between the two countries, even for those living much further south in Scotland, where Viking influence did not reach. Words like bairn and muckle made their way into Scot’s language via the Norwegians.

I touched upon the links during the second world war earlier and have posted before about the Shetland bus which provided a transport link between the Shetland Islands and occupied Norway. Many Norwegian refugees fled their occupied home with the help of Norwegian sailors who undertook daring, high-risk trips across the North Sea. The whole episode became emblematic of the friendship across the seas.

More recently Edinburgh’s Zoo also has a strong connection to Norway as it is home to a very special resident. Sir Nils Olav III is the mascot and colonel-in-chief of the Norwegian King’s Guard. The king penguin’s rank has been passed down through three generations since 1972. Knighted in 2008, he even received a military promotion in 2016 with the brigadier title bestowed upon him in a special ceremony at the zoo.

The Zoo’s link with Norway originated in 1913 when arctic explorer Roald Amundsen presented a penguin to them on their opening. Once a year the penguin inspects soldiers from Norway’s King’s Guard.

Edinburgh's Syttende mai parade – the 17th May or Norwegian Constitution Day parade traditionally takes place along the capital's main thoroughfare, Princes Street. At the boom of Edinburgh Castle's 'one o' clock gun', the pigeons fly and the parade begins!

Pics are from last ears parade.

[burningdaybreak]

"BURN and CHILL" — The Duality of BAD DOGS

Hello everyone! First of all, I'm sorry for not posting a proper essay in the last two months; as I mentioned in my short post the other day, I lost motivation to write for a bit, then thought I should wait until Akito5 (or rather, Rekindle the flame) to post this... however, I think I won't add in Akito5 things after all except for some small things, and rather may write a proper essay about the event sometime soon. This essay had been pretty much done for a while now, but because of my small hiatus, it took me this long to post it. Sorry. (By the way, I fixed and finished this essay while taking breaks from tiering Akito5. I blame any mistakes on that.) Anyways... (Previous introduction) So, ever since I posted my last essay, my works have been getting quite a bit of attention, and I've gotten a lot of interactions and new followers, which makes me happy. I hope people have been enjoying what I write! The topic of this essay is Akito and Touya's duality and contrasts, both within themselves and with each other, which I believe is a pretty interesting topic. There's a lot to talk about here, so, let's get into it!

0. Introduction

Duality: the quality or state of having two different or opposite parts or elements.

When it comes to their characters, their designs, their personalities, and even individual stories, Akito and Touya are pretty much opposites; they contrast each other when it comes to all those aspects, and yet, they're completely inseparable. They are pretty much made to fit together, being two halves of the same whole. The contrasts and differences between each other — or in other words, the duality of their relationship, is basically what makes them perfect for each other, since what one lacks, the other makes up for, and with the other's help and support, they can push each other forward; this, in turn, makes them to be the best partner possible for the other, allowing each other to grow — together. And, through that, they become one, united through one of their common traits: their love for music, spawning a desire to sing with each other and nobody else, forever and ever; an inseparable couple with an unbreakable bond and a growing love for each other that won't be replaced by anybody else... Together, they become BAD DOGS! And so, in this essay, I will talk about their contrasts in a lot of parts of their characters: from the more mundane aspects, like school grades, to how they interact with others, and even their family backgrounds, among other things.

1. Character design

Starting from their very character designs, Akito and Touya are already opposites: their image colors, orange (#FF7721) and blue (#0077DD), are one of the primary complementary color pairs. Complimentary colors are combinations of cool and warm colors that, when placed together, they bring out the best in each other by making their complement more vibrant and noticeable. Even when it comes to their image colors, they're perfect for each other. The warm and cool aspects are also apparent in their designs, with their hair colors (Akito's orange and dyed-blonde hair V.S. Touya's dual-blue hair), both of their default outfits (Akito's outfit colors being predominantly warm colors, such as yellow, red, orange; while Touya's are predominantly cool colors, like purple and blue), and even their personalities, which I'll get into soon. Furthermore, we have BURN and CHILL, the words for Akito and Touya's World Link chapters' Top 100 ranking's titles, which makes their contrasts even more apparent and intentional. Speaking of their personalities, and their warm and cool natures, we also need to mention how Akito and Touya are themed after the sun and moon, respectively. Both of Touya's old and new default designs feature moon-related things, with both of them having "DerMond", which stands for The Moon in German; and his new design having "VERSTECKT MONAT" in the back.

Fun fact: "VERSTECKT MONAT" actually means Hidden Month, but it's likely they actually meant for it to say Hidden Moon, which would have had to be "VERSTECKT MOND"; this mistake possibly comes from the fact that the kanji for moon, 月, stands for both "month" and "moon".

On the other hand, Akito does not have direct associations with the sun in either of his designs like Touya does, but his new default design features the word "SCORCHING", which can be related to the sun. However, we can mention how Akito's last name, Shinonome (東雲), means "daybreak" or "sunrise", which does actually associate him with the sun in some form.

For other forms of sun & moon association in Akito and Touya, we have Akito's second event song, 月光 (Gekkou), translated to Moonlight, obviously being related to the moon; while ミライ (Mirai), Touya's second event song, features a sunrise in its song jacket, so it's related to the sun. Although Gekkou is not explicitly related nor referencing Touya (I talk about this song more in-depth in The Gay Akito Thesis™, if you'd like to learn more about it), I believe the fact that it can be related to Touya; symbolically, it fits Akito and Touya's relationship, and how Akito is chasing after Touya, to be on the same level as his partner, and how the moonlight (Touya) is guiding Akito and taking care of him, always watching over him and supporting him. On the other hand, Mirai (which means Future), a song representing Touya's journey with Vivid BAD SQUAD, and how has finally found a place that accepts him and that he feels comfortable in, a place where he can be himself — a place where they can laugh. Looking back fondly at everything they went through, grateful to everyone and wanting to keep all these memories close to him, and how he wants to keep walking alongside his friends, even in the future — therefore giving this name to the song. Once again, this song is not explicitly related to nor referencing Akito, but between the sunrise in the song jacket, and the lyrics referencing Touya's journey, which Akito is a very important part of, you could say this song can be related to Akito; he's the one that has always been with Touya, the one that showed Touya this new world, the one that brought back Touya's happiness and laughter, and the one that Touya wants to sing alongside with, forever and ever — in a way, Akito is Touya's future.

Another fun fact: Gekkou and Mirai are the only Vivid BAD SQUAD event songs where both Akito and Touya have Another Vocals at the same time, making this association with each other even further. RAD DOGS also has an Another Vocal for Akito and Touya, but it's a duet rather than solo alts, which is also a noteworthy fact because it's the only Akito + Touya duet Another Vocal.

Finally, even in their card sets, you can see how they're themed after each other's theme, with sunlight being a predominant theme in Same Dreams,Same Colors' cards, while moonlight is one of the main parts of Akito and Touya's cards in THE POWER OF UNITY's cards:

Final fun fact of this section: Speaking of Same Dreams,Same Colors, we can mention how Touya's card's costume is named Winter Camp Jacket, while Akito's is named Autumn Camp Jacket; this is a reference to their names as the kanji for "Tou" (冬) in Touya can also mean winter, and "Aki" is also the word for autumn or fall in Japanese. Coincidentally, Same Dreams,Same Colors was released on December 20, 2021, right before the Winter Solstice (December 21), which is when the fall season ends and the winter season begins, making it very fitting that both Touya and Akito were the main cards in the gacha banner.

Considering these two songs are the second event songs for each of them (that is, the second event song rotation), and they're themed after the other's theme in both songs and cards, along with both having Another Vocals in both songs, you could say they reference each other in these events, too.

2. Personality

When it comes to their actual personalities, they are also very like the sun and moon, with their characters even being themed after those: Akito is the sun, in the way he guides people — he fuels others' passions by the intensity of his own. Furthermore, he is the sun in the way that his fire often burns so bright and hot that it burns him along with it. He is very passionate and active and with a desire to shine the brightest, to be in the spotlight — the star of the show. Then, Touya is the moon, in the way that he's more gentle in his approach to things; mysterious at first glance, but often one of the brightest lights despite the darkness — with a soft, illuminating, and guiding presence — and who is somehow so perfectly positioned to match the sun. As an extra detail, the moon is allowed to shine thanks to the sun's light, which really fits Akito and Touya's relationship of Akito bringing back the light to Touya's life, allowing him to shine as his own person once more. And now, Akito is chasing after his partner's light — the moonlight, aiming to reach his level, to walk by his side and reach their dreams together. Even here, their relationship of giving and receiving is abundantly clear: Akito grants light and love to Touya, and to reciprocate, Touya wants Akito to rely on him too; to give back that light and love that was given to him. Chasing after each other, relying on each other, inspiring each other, guiding each other... this cycle of giving love and reciprocating that love is a core part of their relationship, and what makes them so inseparable.

However, when it comes to sun and moon, we should also talk about the usual sun / moon perception in fandoms, and how people interpret both Akito and Touya: In the traditional sense of the trope, "sun" characters are characters that are active, loud, cheerful, and often associated with dogs (more especifically golden retrievers); while, on the other hand, "moon" characters are characters that are viewed as cold, rude, harsh, and quiet, and associated with cats (normally black cats). From that description, I could say Akito is a bit like the moon in the way that he's more aloof, reserved, and "introverted", not bothering with matters that don't interest him and only really having a special spot for Touya (and only doing things if they somehow involve Touya), and being kind of rough and rude. Akito can also easily be associated with cats due to his double-faced personality, his fear of dogs, his reserved nature but affection for specific people, and his orange hair and green eyes, which is the most common pretty much default orange cat. Furthermore, Touya has been shown with a specific, stray orange cat a few times, which I believe is no coincidence...

Fun fact: 猫被り or nekokaburi, which means "wolf in sheep's clothing" or "feigned innocence", or directly translated as "donning a cat's mask", is an expression that Akito is officially referred by. In his paired Kizuna Rank title with Kohane, ハムハムと猫被り (Hamuhamu and Nekokaburi), hamuhamu is a word used to describe eating noises, and Kohane is also often associated with hamsters in the game, which this title definitely references, since hamu also means hamster. (Also hamsters make cute noises when they eat! Therefore, hamuhamu.) And so, one could think that nekokaburi isn't just a term to describe Akito's double-faced personality, but also to associate him with cats, due to the way some cats are that appear to be friendly, but can be aloof and temperamental, which really highlights the contrast between Akito's appearance and what he's truly like; giving this title a quite fitting double meaning — describing Kohane and Akito's personalities, but also associating both characters with those animals. However, this double meaning was sort of lost in the official English translation, as it was simply translated to "Hammie & Feigned Innocence"; although it's understandably difficult to translate it and keep the original meaning behind it.

Meanwhile, Touya is a bit like the sun in the way that he's bright and more "extroverted", curious to learn and try new things for the sake of experience, which you could associate with him being dog-like — a puppy-like innocence with a desire to interact with the new world around him, having been caged for many years. Furthermore, in the Project SEKAI×Sanrio Characters collab, Touya got a card with Pochacco the dog, and Akito himself compares Touya with Pochacco in his curiosity; not to mention the collab's 4koma featuring Touya with dog ears and a tail, which he is wagging out of excitement — he definitely seems like the kind of boy who needs a tail to wag. Touya is generally laid back, with a calm and quiet nature, but because of his inexperience, he has a tendency to wander into things for the sake of learning and experiencing new things. And so, he's more inclined to talking with people and helping others, which can lead one to believe Touya's similar to the sun. When it comes to the fandom and associating them with the sun and moon, people they often end up trying to shove them into the usual "boxes" of the common sun and moon tropes, often leading to mischaracterization, since they don't look at these characters any more deeply than a surface level read of them. As is usual for common sun characters, Akito is cheerful, loud, and active at a first glance, but there's more to him than that; furthermore, believing he's a "golden retriever-like" character just doesn't feel right. I'd say he's definitely very dog-like, despite his fear of dogs, but golden retrievers are more like dogs that are playful and friendly, which Akito really isn't; he's more of a dog in the sense that he's very loyal (to Touya), determined, and with a fiery and strong personality. He also lowkey likes getting praised by his partner. He's a lot like a dog... but I believe that, ultimately, he's not actually a dog — just that he acts like/wants to be like a dog. While Touya, as is usual for common moon characters, is quiet and with what can be interpreted as a scary and tough appearance, this is just the first impression of him as a person and not all there is to his true self. I could say he's a bit cat-like, but I believe the connection is weaker and most of the time comes from judging him on the surface (viewing him as a mysterious, quiet, withdrawn guy), and not taking into account his whole personality and development. However, the fact both of them can be associated with both dogs and cats is quite interesting and fun, and adds yet another contrast in themselves, and also between each other. A "cat that wants to be like a dog" (Akito) and a "dog that acts like a cat" (Touya) are simply perfect fits for them — very contradictory, which is a common theme in both of them. [Addition post-Rekindle the flame: in Kohane's 4✰ card's second side story, we have both Kohane and An commenting on how a cat really fits Akito, so we now have an explicit mention of Akito being like a cat... this is huge, really. Akito truly and intentionally is like a cat.]

Disregarding what animals they would theorically be, however, since it's not really important... thinking that Akito's the sun and Touya's the moon for the reasons I mentioned in the previous paragraphs isn't wrong, because they are the sun and moon, respectively; but if people believe there's nothing more to them than what is associated with the tropes, I think it shows a lack of understanding to the depth of their characters — it's a case of "judging books by their covers"; which is something Akito absolutely hates, by the way. Project Sekai's characters are characters that are in constant development, and they keep changing and growing as people as they explore the world around them and interact with their close ones and other people they meet. Growth is a very important theme among all the characters, so pushing them into singular boxes, or common tropes, or anything else, and not viewing any depth in them, is not really right. They are growing, they aren't simple people and there's more to them than meets the eye, so saying they are this or that will never be fully right. But in the end, when taking into account their whole characters and designs, Akito is the sun and Touya is the moon (as they are explicitly themed after these), but they have traits of the other even if they aren't themed after it — they kind of are "a sun that acts like the moon" and "a moon that acts like the sun", putting it simply. I think this makes them quite contrastful and very interesting characters; this depth leads to them being interpreted in many ways, and even if many of those interpretations aren't fully correct, it's interesting to see how people view these characters, and shows just how deep and complex they really are. They are a bit of everything, in my opinion, and I genuinely think they can't be boiled down to just one thing or another. The way I see it, they'd be more like a mix of a bunch of contradictory things... rather than fitting in just one, individual box.

Following up on the topic of the impression of their characters, Akito and Touya are also contrasting in the way they initially appear in the story, and how they subvert those expectations. When he first appears in Vivid BAD SQUAD's main story, Akito is shown acting surprisingly outward, friendly, relaxed, polite, and gentle, hiding his true nature... that is, showing a fake innocence (nekokaburi, which, as mentioned earlier, means "wolf in sheep's clothing" or "feigned innocence", and is a term that Akito has officially been referred by). In reality, Akito's a very serious guy, who doesn't mince his words, and acts mostly cold and rude to most people that aren't important to him (mainly his partner). He has a double-faced nature, so to say. This shows a duality within Akito himself, where he shows a good face to other people in order to keep a cordial relationship, and therefore avoid troublesome situations. This is pretty interesting as Akito is someone who really pushes himself to make up for what he lacks: he has no music experience, and in an attempt to reach the level of his teammates, he overworks himself; and in the same way, he makes up for his lack of interest in interacting with others by showing off a fake personality. There is more things Akito tries to make up for, such as attempting to seem tougher than he is and appearing stereotypically manly; however, that's a topic that will be brought up later. All of the aforementioned is so people won't judge him prematurely; Akito hates people that make fun of him and his skills, but most of all, of what's most important to him — that is, his dream. On the other hand, when Touya first appears, he's shown as a scarily quiet and reserved guy, who doesn't really talk nor show emotions. This directly contrasts Akito's (fake) outward and friendly personality, though it also contrasts Akito's true nature of not mincing his words and saying what he thinks. At first, Touya is a character who doesn't really express how he feels, whether on his face or verbally. After a childhood that was mainly spent dedicated to playing classical music, unable to ever satisfy his family's high expectations, Touya grew apart from his emotions and leading an unhappy life, until he finally grew tired of it and ran away. Meeting Akito was the beginning of getting back in touch with his emotions, being able to enjoy music once again by singing with him, and everyone's kindness and support showing him that he can now be his own person. Touya then slowly learns how to show his feelings, becoming a happier person than he was in the past thanks to his partner, his friends, and everyone else that supports him, showing his true nature as a boy with a curiosity to explore the world around him and learn new things about himself and everything that surrounds him, and with a desire to repay the kindness of everyone that has helped him become his own person. This shows a contrast within Touya himself, too, between his sad, past self, and his happy, current self. Comparing his current personality, such as in his recent focus event Let It Ring! Beautiful Sound!, and his personality back when he met Akito, as shown in the VIRTUAL SINGER World Link event At the Beginning of SEKAI With You, in Len's chapter, is like night and day; Touya is much happier and cheerful nowadays, all thanks to his partner.

For contrasts between each other, we have the fact that Akito is insecure about himself and masks his true self, both through a feigned innocence, and by making up for his weaknesses; while Touya is more genuine and simply showing himself as he is, now confident in his own person. We also have the fact that, despite their first impressions, with Akito being more friendly, and Touya being more cold, the tables are turned and Akito is actually the more introverted and reserved person, mainly keeping to himself and being mostly cold to others, while Touya is more extroverted and always down to interact with others. But that doesn't mean Akito's exclusively reserved, since he still very much has an active, passionate, and fiery personality; and Touya isn't simply outward and someone who talks with others easily, he's still quiet and calm. This shows how contrasting their own personalities are, too. As a funny mention, Akito does end up often doing things and interacting with people he normally wouldn't do so because of Touya, folding pretty easily when Touya asks him to do something by simply saying "Akito.", or doing things if they are even mildly related to his partner. His partner ends up being a source of motivation quite often.

🥞 So… I'm only helpin' you out here for Touya's sake, alright.

And we also have Touya often being kept in check by Akito, with the latter sort of overprotecting Touya and looking after him at all times. In the end, even in funny ways, they make up for each other's faults, and they help the other grow and improve and be better versions of themselves — that's what being partners is about, after all. Yet another interesting contrast to mention is how they approach problems: Touya has been shown to have a predisposition to run away from and avoid troublesome things that he doesn't know how to face. The main example of this is in Vivid BAD SQUAD's main story, where rather than telling Akito how he feels, Touya instead lied to him, which resulted in BAD DOGS' temporary break up. Touya believed that lying to his partner would be better than disappointing him, and so, he ran away from his feelings, and from Akito. Touya was afraid of facing his partner and telling him about those feelings he dislikes. He was scared that Akito wouldn't accept those feelings, that he would leave him; but he also thought Akito deserved a better partner than him, someone who wasn't so half-hearted. He kept running away from his feelings: not just from telling them to his partner, but also from how he really felt, since he did actually love music, and enjoyed singing with Akito, and wanted to chase his dream — their dream, together. But Akito's recklessness and refusal to give up on them allowed Akito and Touya to become partners once again. Akito accepts Touya no matter what, even though he never believed Touya was half-hearted and always believed in him; and he makes Touya voice how he really feels.

☕ Gh…! Isn’t it obvious that I want to…! I’ve felt that so many times! I wanted to chase that dream with you as far as I could…!

Despite that, Touya was still unsure about being partners with Akito, but Akito won't allow any other outcome; they both know how they feel, they both want to be together, and that's all that matters:

🥞 Oh, shut up already. Don’t go makin’ this complicated. I want to be with you, and you want to be with me as well. And after that, our dream will come true. … Isn’t that enough?

With his partner by his side, Touya will no longer run away from how he really feels, and keep singing with Akito, no matter what, for years to come.

Another example of Touya's predisposition to run away is back before meeting Akito, when he ran away from home because he couldn't handle the stress of living under the pressure of his family's expectations. However, the regrets of that choice haunted him for a long time, affecting him and his self-confidence, preventing him to be proud of himself and his works. Fortunately, he's now gotten to terms with it, and accepts both classical music and the fact that he ran away. This is something he can't change, but he now accepts it as part of himself: he may regret running away from classical music, but he realizes that, as long as he enjoyed that time, he shouldn't beat himself up over it, and instead use it as his weapon — his feelings and experiences will allow him to become a better version of himself, and create stuff he can be proud of.

"My past has become my strength."

Akito, on the other hand, faces things head on, and more often than not, in a reckless way; such as participating in the Crawl Green live, despite only having been singing for a year and definitely not having enough skill for it, because Shepard challenged him and he had a pride to uphold; or how years later he faced that same team challenged him to a duel and, despite winning, he immediately went running and didn't celebrate his victory because he can't be satisfied with his current skill level. He's a guy that does things on the spur of the moment: he follows his own code (or, in other words, his heart), and does what he truly wants — what he feels is right. Suddenly quitting soccer, and suddenly deciding to dedicate his whole life to singing... and also confronting people because he's not satisfied with how things went (confronting Touya in Vivid BAD SQUAD's main story), or approaching his friends because he feels something is wrong, like An in Someday, with Our Lyrics Joined Back-to-Back and Bout for Beside You, and Arata in THE POWER OF UNITY. Akito can feel when something's going wrong with others, and often confronts them to know what's up. However, that recklessness makes him charge ahead when he's not satisfied with nor believes in himself, and he ignores his own feelings and even his health because of it. Calm down, boy... Fortunately, with his partner and teammates by his side, Akito doesn't have to recklessly rush ahead; he now has friends with the same goal as him, and with them by his side, even when he feels lost and helpless, he can rely on them — they'll help him back up, and support him along the way. They are a team that walks together.

☕ So, in those times where you've hit a wall… rely on me more!

And yet, when it comes to facing other people, Touya is predisposed to help others and interacting with them; if someone needs help, he's likely to accept right away, because he enjoys experiencing new things and likes repaying favors. The main case of this would be Walk on and on, Touya's third focus event, where Touya decides to learn how to compose his own tracks, in order to be able to help his team in some way, and at the same time show his gratitude to them — especially his partner — and how much he appreciates them by pouring his feelings onto his music. Some other minor examples of this are Let's study hard !, where Touya was going to help Akito and An with their studies no matter what (since he's always worried about their grades and them studying properly), and even invited Rui to help tutor Tsukasa, Akito, and An along with him. Or in Take the Best Shot !, where Touya helps Kohane with the photography competition she's entering in order to win special chocolates for An... In short, Touya is a person who is inclined to help others, and likes to give back to everyone, grateful for everything they've done for him. Meanwhile, Akito is mainly wary when it comes to interacting with people that he isn't close to (which is... most people that aren't Touya), and he would rather avoid troublesome things that don't interest him. However, when he does something, he does give it his all — he doesn't like half-assing things. For example, in Rise as ONE! where, despite his fear of dogs, he trains very hard to do his best at the dog disc competition because he related to the bond the injured owner had with his dog Max, which really shows, uh... Akito's one-track mind when it comes to his partner and how passionate he is about him. As mentioned earlier, Akito often ends up doing things he normally wouldn't because of Touya or something related to him, either getting convinced by Touya and giving in pretty quickly, or because his one-way brain somehow relates something random to his partner. So, a guy who runs away, avoiding his problems; and another who recklessly rushes ahead, facing his problems head on... yet, at the same time, the former is always up to help others and engaging with other people, while the latter avoids interacting with troublesome things.

Finally, we can also mention their social skills — or in simpler terms, how they are "book smart vs street smart": Touya has a lot of knowledge, and is very smart and studious, but he has a total lack of experience in socialising due to his isolated childhood and barely interacting with other people, so he comes off a bit more clumsy and awkward in those settings. He's more experienced in studying rather than interacting with people; but at the same time, this lack of experience is what predisposes him to interact with others and learning more about them, always available to talk to anybody and help them, in order to experience new things. On the other hand, Akito is more versed in interacting with people, with a more regular upbringing — having had to live "by his own means" in the streets to gain experience and make a name for himself, interacting with and facing many kinds of people; that, along with his "customer service face" and general double-faced nature, allows him to socialize well with most people. However, when it comes to school studies... he's not very good! He doesn't really care about studying and is more about living his life to the full — which Touya isn't quite happy about... but then Akito will put in effort for once and make Touya smile brighter than ever and Akito becomes a blushing mess upon being complimented... they're so funny. With that difference in socialization, they make up for each other, with Akito doing "most of the talking", as Touya says; and they contrast each other, too, even when it comes to how they face studying, with Touya helping Akito... although not often by Akito's choice, as Touya takes studies very seriously and will get mad at Akito if he fails. And so, they are quite opposites when it comes to how they deal with problems, and how they face and interact with other people. They keep each other in check; when one runs, the other will catch up, and when one is held back, the other will push him ahead. Those differences in personality actually help them understand each other perfectly: they support each other, and help each other grow, and will always be there for the other... that's what being partners is all about, in the end.

3. Background

Even in their backgrounds, Akito and Touya contrast each other, having had pretty different experiences with both music and their relationships with their family: As we know, Akito fell in love with music and decided to dedicate his whole life to it despite having no skill or experience. But despite that, Akito is determined and passionate to accomplish his dreams, and works extremely hard to improve and reach his goals. Even when he's on the brink of giving up, Akito will keep pushing forward, no matter what, because he finally found something that he truly wants to do — something that finally makes him feel alive; and alongside his partner, he'll keep singing... forever. On the other hand, Touya has lived with music since he was young, being a born prodigy and with a lot of musical experience. Dedicating most of his time to playing music, though, for around ten years, he ended up growing tired of this lifestyle, isolated from a "regular" life and frustrated at his inability to ever reach his parents' expectations, and it led him to run away from music. However, despite thinking otherwise after running away from it, Touya still loved music; although he was afraid of disappointing his partner, just like he disappointed his family in the past, and thought Akito deserved a partner who wasn't as half-hearted as Touya believed he himself was, Akito makes him realize that he still loves music. Nobody who hated music would dedicate as much time and effort as Touya did during those two years where they sang together. Touya finally realizes he actually loves music, and, most of all, singing alongside his partner; although he regrets some choices he made in the past, he learns that he can use his past as his "weapon" — his experiences are unique to him, and so they will become his strength. With this, he'll improve both himself and his music, in order to achieve his dreams — the dreams he shares with Akito. Or, in other words, their dreams.

☕️ Let's go, Akito. Let's make our dreams come true.

When comparing their music backgrounds, a really interesting point of contrast is their innate talent for music, and their relationship with music. Although he was the one that is a born prodigy and extremely gifted with music, it was Touya that briefly came to hate music; and Akito, who didn't have an innate ability for it, was the one who was so dedicated to his love for it that it even ended up hurting him at times. They were both hurt by music, but in different ways: because of their talent, or lack thereof. And yet, they both love music so much they couldn't help but keep fighting to stay with it. They love music so much, they want to keep singing and making music for as long as they live — with the best partner they both could ask for by their side.

When it comes to their family background, and their relationships with their families, there's also many contrasts between Akito and Touya. Touya's family is more traditional and strict with how they raised and educated Touya, expecting him to continue the family tradition of becoming renowned classical musicians. He had a very isolated life: dedicating most of his time to this objective — an objective that he believed he could never reach due to the difference in skill level between him and his father. Exhausted and unsatisfied by this constrained lifestyle, he ended up running away from both classical music and that life. An important detail to mention is, although he wasn't happy with that life, and felt guilt and regret over running away from it for a long time, Touya does not hate either classical music or his father, which is something the fandom often misinterprets. Despite everything he went through, Touya doesn't reject either classical music, and still appreciates it, even if he doesn't have a desire to actively play it anymore. He is grateful for all the knowledge and experience it granted him, and appreciates his family regardless. Opposite to Touya, though, Akito's family raised him with more freedom — or rather, less strictly, and less worried about him. Unlike Touya's father, who was a big presence in Touya's life and education, Akito's father, Shinei, was quite absent, instead occupied by his job as an artist; so you could say the Shinonome family lacked a father figure. Furthermore, even when he was there, Shinei wasn't very good as a parent: when Akito's sister, Ena, expressed the wish to become an artist like their father, instead of encouraging and motivating her as a good parent would, he instead discouraged her in the worst way possible, effectively ruining her life. Although we later find out that it was because the life of an artist is very rough and Shinei didn't want his daughter to also experience those hardships, he really didn't express it well at all.

With a father that was mostly absent, and who barely carried his role as a father well, the Shinonome family did not really have a male role model that taught and guided the children of the family. So, despite being the younger brother, Akito pretty much took up the role of a "male role model" for his sister, supporting and looking after her as she lived a life with the regret of being unable to carry out her dream. This, in turn, led him to have a warped view on masculinity and gender roles, which will be elaborated on in the next section. Unlike Touya's family, where Harumichi (Touya's father) had high expectations for his children, and wanted Touya to continue the family tradition of becoming classical musicians just as his brothers previously did, Akito's family had a father that did not want his children to follow in his steps, and neither parent had particular expectations for their children and instead allowed them to do what they wanted. This leads to a curious contrast, where Touya mainly lived a strict and difficult life and, upon fleeing from it, became more free and able to do what he wanted, while Akito (and Ena) lived a very free life, where they were allowed to do what they wanted, with no expectations or rules for them, and yet chose to focus on a difficult goal for which they weren't experienced or talented for — Touya fled from a cage, and Akito and Ena chose to place themselves in one, in a metaphorical way. However, Akito instead found a male role model in a different person: Ken-san, the man that ignited a fire in him upon witnessing RAD WEEKEND, and also the one that motivated Akito to keep singing when he was on the brink of giving up, pushing him forward and giving him the advice to do what he loves, regardless of what others think. Akito truly respects and appreciates Ken-san's guidance, being extremely excited and immediately agreeing to being trained by him in BURN MY SOUL — there's no bigger honor for Akito than to be taught by the man that contributed so much to his life... Ken-san is, in a way, a second father to him.

In contrast to the comparison between Shinei and Harumichi and the education of their children and their expectations for them, Ken-san plays a positive role on Akito as a person, motivating him to follow his dream and guiding Akito forward, and allowing him to be true to himself, while Harumichi wasn't such a positive influence in Touya's life, where, rather than motivating Touya, he mainly pressured him to be a specific way and didn't give him room to grow. To finish off, Ken-san's positive influence can be broadly associated to Vivid Street and all the people living there: with a community that is united by music and the freedom to sing as you like, Akito, Touya, and everyone else are able to be free — be themselves, and have as much fun as possible, without worrying about labels or expectations. Vivid Street is pretty much like a big family, especially to An, and they accept and support anybody who wishes to express themselves through music. Although derailing a bit from the current topic, Vivid Street is interesting in the way that it can work as a queer community allegory: a community that allows the Vivid BAD SQUAD kids to be and find themselves and supporting them to show their true selves. Besides An, who lived there to begin with, the other Vivid BAD SQUAD kids all grew and figured out stuff about themselves singing in Vivid Street, away from their homes — from their previous lives, so to say; away from the regular life that wanted them to stick to rules and norms, labels, and usual expectations. As mentioned before, in Vivid Street, they can sing freely, having as much fun as they want, and without worrying about anything — they can just be themselves, and do what they truly want to do: sing along with their partners, and reach their dreams together. And nothing else matters! They're just them, regardless of what others think; and that's what's important, in the end.

4. Gender

(Disclaimer: This section may repeat things from the previous section; this is because I wrote this one first.) Following up on the queer topic, a very interesting yet possibly controversial topic is how both Akito and Touya view and interact with gender, whether directly or indirectly. Masculinity, gender roles, and conforming to those... it's quite interesting to think about. While I've already talked quite a bit about this topic in The Gay Akito Thesis™, my aim here is to compare Akito and Touya's characters. Also because I like talking about this topic. On the topic of Akito and gender, I talk about it more in-depth in The Gay Akito Thesis™, so I recommend checking that essay for a wider look at the topic, but the most essential part is that Akito's writing is very gendered; it is a very ingrained part of Akito's character, whether intentionally or not. The way he hides and even ignores his feelings and emotions and how he hates crying, viewing those as weaknesses and ashamed of showing any sign of being weak or uncool in front of others, are typical elements of traditional masculinity. He also often deals with his problems with anger, and sometimes aggressiveness, and showing frustration, which are more "socially acceptable" for men traditionally. He even used to exhibit behavior that can be interpreted as toxic masculinity in the past, saying things that can be seen as homophobic — which can be easily related to insecurity of his own sexuality and what others could think of it, since it comes off that way rather than actual bigoted behavior. (Fortunately, that kind of behavior hasn't popped up at all in a long time, proving he's not a bigot and was just insecure) Akito's very reserved when it comes to how he feels, and insecure about himself, viewing himself as "weak" and "not good enough", therefore actively trying to be masculine to make up for his faults and flaws. Even though I don't think anybody else would really mind his real self, Akito is not satisfied with himself, and others making fun of him and his goals got to him, so he ended up ingraining traditionally masculine traits onto himself to appear cool, strong, and manly to others. This overly masculine behavior can quite easily be associated with his sexuality and gender, more specifically to homosexuality and transexuality and insecurity of those, although those fall more into personal interpretation territory; however, I deeply believe these queer readings fit into Akito's character and story perfectly, and even enhance it (as I explain in The Gay Akito Thesis™). Akito actively tries to be masculine, to conform to "normal" masculinity, and hiding and avoiding his feelings and emotions to not be seen as weak by others. He's not satisfied with himself and how he thinks others view him, therefore he'll show himself as someone that can't be made fun of, someone that others will take seriously, and show everyone just how strong and determined he really is. He'll become someone that he himself can be satisfied with.

This is not to say that Akito isn't cool, strong, or manly, though, those are very much part of himself; but, deep down, Akito's an insecure person who doubts himself and his abilities, and his arc is all about getting to terms with how far he has come and getting in touch with his emotions and showing them to everyone to become a better version of himself, and accepting himself — learning that he's good enough and that there's no need to try so hard. He is fine just like he is, both how he feels inside and how he shows himself to others — they are all part of him, and he should be more confident in his abilities, and himself. On the other hand, Touya's gender is... a pretty debated topic in the fandom, so to say. Contrary to Akito, Touya does not really care about gender norms or roles, he's not particularly focused on how he shows himself to others nor if the stuff he does, such as wearing make up or carrying plushies around, are not "masculine". However, Touya himself is a masculine character. While Akito actively tries to be masculine, Touya has been raised in more traditional values, which leads him to be an inherently masculine character. The youngest son of the Aoyagi family... that's who Aoyagi Touya is, and that's a pretty important part of his character. The more conscious parts of his character, such as the expectations of carrying on the Aoyagi family tradition of becoming a classical musician just like his older brothers did; and the more unconscious parts, such as growing apart from his emotions and not showing them in the past, and expressing his frustration through anger rather than crying... these are all related to masculinity and traditional gender norms.

Fun fact: Touya is the only character who has not canonically cried at any time (as of writing this essay). In fact, his Live2D model is straight up not able to cry at all — he just can't cry (yet).

Touya being inherently masculine can be associated to the fact that he was raised in a family that was predominantly composed of men: his father, and his two older brothers. His mother takes on the more traditional role of a housewife, and therefore likely didn't have much of a role in Touya's education; it was mostly Touya's father who was in charge of teaching him, and so Touya ended up inheriting a lot of his father's values. But, Touya ends up running away from classical music, and by extension, that lifestyle. Meeting Akito was the first step — into a new life that he is happy, into a new world where he can find himself, away from that life that didn't allow him to be the happy little boy he was meant to be. By Akito's side, Touya slowly learns to be himself: figuring out what he's like, recovering the joy and happiness in his life, and bringing back the little boy in him that was never allowed out and is so curious to explore and interact with the world around him. And so, we go back to his gender: no longer held back by an unsatisfying life, Touya is now a guy who is very excited to learn new things and satiating his curiosity, and he's not held back by things being "not masculine" or "girly"; he has no problem trying out wearing make up, for example. In general, Touya seems like a character who does not really care about his gender, which often leads to the fandom to interpret him as girly and feminine, and even a woman — however, that's far from the truth. He's not afraid of trying out "feminine" things or having "cute" hobbies; he doesn't let how those things are viewed hinder him, and he simply doesn't care about how others view him. He just wants to be himself and enjoy his life. As it currently stands, he does not want to be a girl, and still views himself as a guy. He just doesn't really care about things like "gender" the same way Akito is. In the end, it's fine to headcanon or interpret characters any way you want, but I believe Touya's story and character mainly work because he's the son of the Aoyagi family, and as a boy, the expectations for him were higher; the guilt of going against the tradition, of disappointing his family, and most importantly, his father, have the weight on him that they do because he's a man, as (unfortunately) the society he lives in has higher expectations from men than women.

Running away from the traditional values of his family and the family tradition, and from society's expectations — with Touya slowly finding himself surrounded by a community of people that value him and allow him to be himself, not worried about the gender norms or his gender, along with the deep bond he has with his same-sex partner — really adds a very easy queer reading to his story and character. In short, Touya is confident in how he is, and comfortable in his current gender — he's just curious and excited to try new things, and not insecure about or held back by typical gender norms (like Akito is). He's totally fine and happy doing those things even as a man and that is, possibly, the epitome of masculinity. Akito and Touya both interact with their gender and identity in quite different ways, leading to more contrasts between their characters: Akito is a guy who actively tries to be masculine, while Touya is a guy who is inherently masculine. This likely comes, in part, from how they were raised: with Akito being raised with more liberty to do what he wanted, in a family that didn't look after him that much, and in a predominantly female family (his mother and sister), since his father was mostly absent due to work; while Touya was raised a lot more stictly by his father, and having a predominantly male family (father and brothers), with his mother not having much of a say on Touya's education and simply acting as a mother figure for him. This leads Akito to try very hard to be more masculine and take on a more typical male role when his unconfident and unsatisfied personality increase, with a harsh world that keeps trampling over him despite his sincere feelings. He doesn't want to be seen as weak or pathetic, therefore he'll show everyone just how strong and cool he is. Meanwhile, Touya is indifferent towards his masculinity and gender, wanting to explore the new world around him regardless of what others think. He's not worried at all about how others see him, he just wants to learn more about everything that he finds interesting. However, that doesn't mean he rejects his masculinity or gender — he's just not worried about it and very confident in how he is. This contrast, though, also leads to interesting situations between both of them, such as Akito, despite being more stubborn and embarrassed about his gender, he often sacrifices a little bit of embarrassment for Touya's sake when there's something his partner wants to do (for example, the photo print in Close game/OFFLINE where Akito and Touya had to pose cutely, but Akito sacrificing his dignity in order to win); or Touya, who's more carefree and doesn't worry about how others view him and gender (for example, him carrying around plushies he wins at crane games and Akito worried about how Touya will be seen as others (due to Akito's own insecurity), but Touya not really understanding what Akito's talking about, since he doesn't really care about those things).

In summary, the contrasts between Touya and Akito's genders and how they view it and interact with it are: Touya, although inherently masculine and raised more traditionally and strictly, does not really worry about how others view him and simply wants to enjoy himself, be himself, and explore the world around him, regardless of what others think — which, in a way, makes him truly masculine, as he's confident in how he really is. While Akito, raised more freely and allowed to do what he wants, really worries about how others view him and what they think of him — so he actively tries to conform to typical masculinity and gender roles, masking his insecurities, in an effort to not be mocked by others. This does not deny his manly self, though, and all the ways that Akito shows himself are a part of him — and it's part of his character development to come to terms with how he truly feels and accepting himself, as has happened more recently, with Akito being more confident and showing how he feels to others. Once again, they're pretty much opposites, but as two guys with a deep bond, who interact with and acknowledge each other's feelings, they support each other and grow as people — and as partners. These differences in how they view themselves, and each other, enhance their bond and make it stronger, as they can make up for what the other lacks. Despite the stereotype that men don't show how they feel (although their conflict during the main story is exactly due to their lack of communication), Akito and Touya are really in touch with their feelings, both their own and their partner's, and a big part of their arcs and their story together is about figuring out their feelings and finding themselves. While they don't explicitly show how they feel often, they don't have to — their relationship is so strong and deep, they don't need to put into words how they feel (though, deep down, they still would like to hear it...). And that, in a way, defies typical masculinity; their relationship itself goes against gender norms, and, for good reason, often leads it to be interpreted beyond a regular friendship... they truly love and care about each other. They're the best partner they could have, and the only one they ever want to be with.

5. Love

(Yet again, I am talking about love; sorry, I love this topic. As a disclaimer: it's quite similar to what I write about this topic in previous essays, so this section can be skipped if you're tired of the topic. However, I feel like it's something I must add, as it is relevant to the main point of the essay.) How Akito and Touya love, and also view love, also contrasts each other. I've brought up in various essays before, but a specific set of lines from Aun no Beats, a song that Akito and Touya cover, perfectly represents them:

🥞♪ Why do I want to be loved? ☕️♪ Why do I want to love?

Although it's not just this set of lines that represents them and their relationship, but the song in general (which I talk about in my previous essay, Aun no Beats & BAD DOGS' Relationship), these two lines exactly represent the very core of themselves and their relationship with love and, by extension, each other. Akito is a character driven by love. He only wants to do things he's truly passionate about, something that will make his heart beat — and when he truly cares about something, he will give it his all, putting all his effort and love into it. He is, then, a very loving character. Even if he's not "loved back", he doesn't back down or give up on doing what he loves; he listens to his heart, at all costs, doing what he wants to do, regardless of what others think. And yet, despite that burning passion and love, he wants that love to be reciprocated — he wants to be loved in the same way that he loves. Meanwhile, Touya is a character that grew up without love, estranged from his emotions and feelings. He led a life where the passion and love he held for music, for his family, for living slowly vanished, due to a lack of appreciation and freedom from the people around him. Actually, in a way, Touya was loved — but rather than as a person, it was for his talents and his potential. Therefore, Touya grew up without knowing what real love was like. However, meeting Akito, seeing his passion and love for music and for him, and Touya being appreciated for what he is, by both his partner and the new people he meets, allows Touya to find a place where he can be comfortable showing his emotions and feelings. So, Touya learns what love truly is like — and because of that, he wants to love, too; to give back to those that helped him break free from his past: Tsukasa (who Touya considers his savior) and Saki; and those that allowed him to be himself and appreciate and love him for what he is: Kohane, An, the town, his friends, and, most importantly, his partner, Akito. Akito and Touya, then, contrast in their relationship with love: Akito loves (music, the town and other people, etc.) while Touya is loved (by music, the town and other people, etc.); yet Akito wants to be loved, while Touya wants to love — or in other words, they want to receive and give back, respectively, from/to others and, most important, their partner. Their relationship with each other is, in short, one of mutual affection and love — of giving and receiving. Akito and Touya provide to the other what they want and need; they give and receive what they lack, while in turn receiving it from and giving it to their partner. While this point is about love, it also applies to many other things; they genuinely complete each other, making up for each other's shortcomings. They are truly perfect fits for each other, leading to an extremely strong and unbreakable relationship together.

I also wanted to take this chance to talk a bit about their relationship and its common interpretations. Although I've mentioned it many times before, their relationship is not inherently romantic. The concept of partners in Project Sekai is not a romantic partner, but rather, a companion or very close friend — that is, "aibou" (相棒, partner). The concept of aibou is pretty interesting because it is something very special: someone you're extremely close to, and the one and only person you want to be with. It's a very special bond that actually goes beyond a regular friendship — we see this in the way that An considers Haruka her best friend, which raises some brows considering how Kohane is so special and important to her, but this leads to the conclusion that an aibou simply transcends friendship. (Although, I genuinely believe Akito and Touya are not just partners, but also each other's best friends — there simply isn't anybody else they're closer to than each other! They truly mean everything to each other.) Even though it's not inherently romantic, Akito and Touya (and also An and Kohane)'s bond is so close and deep, it just feels like it is sometimes. I believe, rather than being merely platonic or merely romantic, it's more like the lines of the relationship is quite blurred, and this leads to being aibou. Putting it in a simple and funny (yet accurate) way, the concept aibou is not romantic at all, but they're just so gay and crazy about their partners that it becomes gay anyways. The bond between Akito and Touya is simply insane. Akito fell in love instantly with Touya; he knew from the first moment he saw him that he was the one — the one he wanted to partner up with.

🥞 (… I can't take my eyes off him.)

And upon singing with Akito, Touya also felt a special connection with him. Even though he wasn't aware of it at first, Touya, too, wanted to be with Akito, and forever be with him — and he would become aware of it later, and completely change him and his view of his partner. Akito fell first, and Touya fell harder, so to say. To put into perspective how insane their bond is: in Len's chapter from At the Beginning of SEKAI With You (the VIRTUAL SINGER World Link event), we find out that the Street Sekai versions of Rin and Len appeared because of Akito and Touya's bond as partners and how close they were to one another... Considering the only concrete lore across all depictions of the Kagamines is that they are reflections of one another and instrinsically linked, it really goes to show how close Akito and Touya were right from the start (or, perhaps, how close they were fated to become): they are pretty much meant to be with one another. (Disclaimer, just in case: This is in no way talking about anything romantic involving the Kagamines, and rather comparing Akito and Touya's platonic and partner bond with them.) To finish off, returning to talking about love and contrasts: Akito doesn't particularly love himself, not being confident in his skills and being insecure about being seen as weak and uncool; and yet, he pushes through and is confident on what he wants to achieve, always looking ahead and wanting to push past his limits. He, in a way, looks for this love for himself he lacks from others, wanting to be admired and loved. Similarly, Touya doesn't hold himself in high regard, with his past mistakes dragging him down and thinking he's not worthy of being Akito's partner; but, upon realizing his feelings and how he's loved and appreciated by Akito, he becomes confident on how he feels and what he wants to do — aiming to reach his dreams along with his partner. He knows he wants to be by Akito's side, for years to come, experiencing new things alongside him and giving back everything that Akito has given him. They're quite similar in this regard, in the way they're both unconfident on themselves, and yet, are confident on their goals and what they want to do. Eventually, though, they both improve on how they feel about themselves: with Akito learning to stop a bit and appreciate how far he has come — having become a source of inspiration for others because of how hard he was worked to reach where he is; and Touya accepting those regrets that hold him down, realizing that those are something he can't change and a part of himself — with his unique experiences giving him a special strength. In short, love is a very integral part of Akito and Touya, both in their own characters, and in their relationship. Despite their contrasting experiences, their individual love for music and for each other really shape them as people; their common feelings making their relationship very strong and inseparable — a relationship where they complete one another. Their deep and undying love for each other makes them, after all, the best partner they both could ask for.

6. Other noteworthy contrasts

Finally, we have a section about extra contrasts that didn't really fit into any other section:

To begin with, we can talk about Walk on and on, Touya's third focus event. In that event, Touya gives making his own music a try, and after learning how to create his own tracks through sampling, he shows his creation to the rest of Vivid BAD SQUAD; with this track, he wanted to convey his feelings of gratefulness to Akito and his teammates, for remaining by his side all this time, and for supporting him and allowing him to be himself. While he doesn’t think it’s that good, everyone else really likes it, with Akito praising his partner for his good work, and saying really wants to sing this song. Touya says he’s especially thankful to Akito; for finding him after he had left classical music, and telling him it’s okay to sing by his side.

☕ I realized how lucky I am to still be singing with my partner… I was able to make this song because I wanted to be at his side, as his partner, for years to come.

Thanks to Akito, he didn’t quit music, and is extremely grateful that he is able to keep singing next to his partner; he wants to continue being Akito’s partner forever; and that is why he was able to make this track.

☕ Akito, you’re the best partner I could ever ask for.

This event is really special as it shows how special the bond between Touya and Akito is, and just how inseparable they are. They're truly the best partner possible for each other.

Fun fact related to Utsuro wo Aogu (Walk on and on's commissioned song): in the Master chart, the Full Combo total note number is 1112; coincidentally, Akito and Touya's character IDs are 11 and 12, respectively. Furthermore, Akito's birthday is November 12, aka 11/12 (or, depending where you live, 12/11), so the song's total note count matches Akito and Touya's IDs, and also Akito's birthday. This is definitely very intentional, considering the plot of the event and the costumes (which I'll talk about next), so this song is pretty much like a song dedicated to Akito and Touya's bond, and also a song dedicated to Akito especifically. This is so sweet... (This is vaguely unrelated but adding this for adair. And because I really like this fact)

Now getting to the point: with Walk on and on came the From on a perch Gacha card set. The cards from this set have a lot of symbolism, and I do talk about them in various of my previous essays, especially when it comes to the freedom and captivity themes. But leaving aside the freedom and captivity themes, as I have a series of essay for those themes, their designs also hold quite a bit of symbolism.

The main design themes of the set are birdcages and crows, with the characters' outfits predominantly being black and white. Touya (and Kohane) wears mainly white, while Akito (and An) wears mainly (or only, in An's case) black, showing a mirror between the each partner pair's outfits. In addition, Kohane and An's cards feature white crows, while Touya's card features black crows (and Akito himself), dividing them into two pairs. A special detail about this card set's outfits, though, is something that can't be seen at first sight: they feature wings on their backs. More specifically, each of the Vivid BAD SQUAD members has one wing on their backs, although Akito and An's wings can only be seen vaguely in Touya's card and her own card, respectively; but considering the context, it can be assumed they both have a wing that matches and mirrors their own partner's, making a pair of wings when they're together — becoming one.

(Touya's outfit, Melody Walker. The first picture is the default look, while the second picture is his Master Rank 1 (MR1) variant.) Furthermore, if you look at Touya's costume MR1 variant, it features Akito's image color (orange) where the default outfit's blue is, and the black and white elements of the shirt itself are mirrored. Moreover, the wing on the back is the exact same color as the default outfit's, but mirrored. The other Master Rank variants don't match the wing's color or even form a pair with it, so this really suggests Touya and Akito are meant to match, showing how they contrast each other. (This is also the case with Kohane's outfit and her MR1 variant, and Kohane and An's colors and the wings, but theirs are white rather than gray.) Also, these designs may be based on the concept of Jian (鹣), also known as birds that fly wing to wing or lovebirds (比翼鳥), are mythical birds that possess only one eye and one wing. They are often used as a metaphor to refer to a beloved couple in Chinese culture and tradition. These creatures are born imperfect, and they need to lean against each other and act as one in order to be able to fly. Their mutual dependence is eternal, lasting through death and rebirth. They are believed to be symbols of the complementary relationship between yin and yang. To finish off, crows are also a curious choice because crows are animals that mate for life — and in the story, Touya said to Akito he wanted to stand shoulder to shoulder with Akito for the rest of his life, which is where the crows are landing on, in Touya's card — Akito and Touya's shoulders, where their wings would be. They're truly meant to be together forever... (credits to adair for telling me about the jian birds stuff. this is kinda crazy really)

Now for more minor contrasts, we have Find A Way Out's card set, Break the Chain Gacha. In this card set, the characters wear black rider/biker costumes, and then blue or red layers; Akito (and Kohane) wear red, while Touya (and An and Luka) wear blue under their biker jackets. This makes the partners contrast with each other, with Akito and Kohane wearing the warmer color, and similar to their image colors being warm colors (orange and pink); and Touya and An wearing a cool color, which is also their image colors (dark blue and teal, respectively). Although the main reason they're wearing these colors is for the heart theme in the event and song (made even more clear with the Kashika 2DMV and how the characters are arranged like an anatomical heart) — with the characters being the veins and arteries of the heart, and all together keeping the heart that is Vivid BAD SQUAD beating, — I believe the color contrasts between the partners is completely intentional.

As a fun fact, Find A Way Out released on December 11, 2022; that is, 12/11 (or 11/12, depending where you live). As mentioned earlier, Akito and Touya's character IDs are 11 and 12, respectively, and they're both (along with Luka) the 4✰ cards in the card set. This one may be a coincidence, but it was pretty funny to notice this. Also, again, Akito's birthday is November 12, aka 11/12 (or 12/11), so it's like his birthday date but reversed. It's pretty curious that Akito's birthday is Akito and Touya's character IDs put together, isn't it? This one has to have been 100% on purpose, really.

For a final cards contrast: recently the third anniversary event happened, and Touya got a new limited 4✰ card with it. What's interesting about this card is that it contrasts Akito's previous anniversary 4✰ card in various ways, such as how the cards are black and white, which are opposite colors; furthermore, the second anniversary's card set is after black lilies, while Touya's card especifically is themed after white lillies; this feels like an intentional choice because the cards in the fourth anniversary card set all have different flowers, yet they chose to do lillies again for Touya's card. Something noteworthy to mention is how, in his card, Touya's bringing a lily to his mouth; while Akito, in his card, has a white petal in his mouth. What truly stands out about Touya's flower is that, in his card, there's many lilies, but three of them have colored stamens: teal, pink, and orange, which is safe to say represent Vivid BAD SQUAD's members. The teal and pink ones are on the sides of the cards, while the orange-colored stamens flower... is the one on his mouth. I feel like I don't have to say much more about this, really. It's definitely a very intentional choice. So wonderful.

Another fun contrast to talk about is Akito and Touya's moe aspects — that is, cute stuff in their otherwise not-cute characters. For example, despite Akito always trying to look so tough and cool, he likes pancakes and cheesecakes, sweet food that you wouldn't expect from such a guy. Furthermore, he's scared of dogs and not many people really know about this (pretty much just his family and Touya); and he also blushes pretty easily at Touya or when it involves him, such as getting teased for something Touya said, or when getting praised by him. Then we have Touya, who looks so cool,mysterious, and aloof, yet in reality he smiles easily at Akito (nowadays), and is actually a very curious and clumsy boy, who likes playing crane games and giving plushies to his close ones and trying out new things even though he may be terrible at them, like being confident to play a ball throw game then failing spectacularly or climbing a tree despite being afraid of heights and having to be helped down by his partner. Despite both looking or acting so tough and cool, they have stuff about them that are unexpected or even cute about them, which contrasts their own personalities and often leads to fun situations and scenes.

7. Conclusion

In short, Akito and Touya mirror each other in so many ways; they're extremely contrastful. They're genuinely pretty much made for each other, meant to be with one another: their different backgrounds and personalities make them fit each other perfectly, because they have what the other lacks, making up for the other's flaws; and, with that, they can push each other forward, and support each other fully, being fully in sync — and become one in the process. They allow each other to grow, drawing the best out of each other, and their contrasts is what makes them the perfect partner for the other. They're, in the end, the best partner both of them could ask for.

🥞 (Reaching the top through clashing with your partner, isn't your privilege alone!) ☕️ (We both looked to each other—we looked at what we didn't have, and ran upward.) ☕️ (So that we can keep being partners who deserve one another!)

8. Afterword

And that's all for the essay! This one took a little while, but I finally finished it... I tried to be more confident in my writing, and also summarize stories less (I summarized stuff a lot in my past essays), and I think it turned out overall solid (although I believe it still has some flaws). This essay was sort of a group effort thing, where my friends helped me throughout by contributing to it and checking over my progress, so I'm very grateful for everyone's help! Thank you so much!! There isn't much more to say now. Thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoyed the essay! I put a lot of effort into it, and I'm quite proud of it. I will try to write something for Akito's birthday next month... exciting stuff. See ya!

[agentlizardofowca]

I can't copy the shape because mobile, but I'd love a DVD Bonus for "Store Your Nemesis Under Your Bed"!

(HumanPerryAU Takes place after the ending of Store your nemesis under your bed: Phineas just admitted that Perry hid a mysterious man under his bed. To avoid having to talk about it, Perry ran away and hid in his bedroom. Link to the fic for those who are curious)

Candace cornered them with tense shoulders and flashing eyes. There was a sharpness to her that set Ferb on edge. Curiosity he expected, but the hard line of her eyebrows was obsessive.

"Tell me about the man." She breathed the words hard and rushed into the space between her and the brothers.

Mom and Dad were upstairs, trying to coax Perry out of his bedroom, where he'd escaped to after Phineas spilled his dirty secret.

"I didn't see him, Candace." Phineas said in a happy tone, completely unaware of the tension in their sister's shoulders. "Ferb pointed it out to me."

Candace swiped her hair over the other shoulder and gazed at Ferb. She knew he usually preferred to let other people do the talking, so she usually posed her questions to the room at large.

Ferb appreciated this. He liked it even more that every once in a while Candace broke that pattern to include him.

What do you think Ferb? Or Are you okay? Candace wasn't just curious, she was also very genuine. Something she and Phineas had in common. Ferb loves his siblings so much.

"I couldn't see him very well, he was under the bed."

"But you knew he was there?"

"I could see his eyes."

Candace parted her lips, but Ferb already knew what to say.

"Blue."

Candace hummed. "I wonder who he was."

"Do you think Uncle Perry will tell us?" Phineas asked optimistically as if their uncle hadn't just fled from the dining table.

"Why did he feel so guilty? It's not like we don't know he likes men. Did Dad forbid him to take his boyfriends home? He wouldn't," She scrunched her nose as she thought. "Right?"

"You think that was his boyfriend?" Phineas asked and he tapped the tip of his nose as he pondered. Romance had always been a mystery to Phineas, and apparently, the concept of their uncle having a love life was foreign to him. Isabella was fighting an uphill battle.

"Who else would he hide away under his bed?" Candace asked as if she genuinely wanted a serious answer.

Phin shrugged. "They could just be friends I guess."

"Maybe he secretly ordered pizza, just for himself." Ferb joked.

"That still doesn't explain why." Candace squinted the way she did before she was going to make someone else's business her own. She ignored Ferb's last remark and left the room to go join her parents at Perry's door.

Ferb just shrugged, they weren't going to figure it out unless Perry wanted them to know. And if Ferb knew one thing about his uncle, it was that he was good at keeping secrets.

Phineas wished Candace good luck as she stalked out of the room. "There is no way Perry is going to let them in now." He point out to Ferb, who nodded in agreement. A moment later he paused as he noticed something peculiar over Phineas' shoulder.

A slipper landed in the grass outside the window.

Ferb angled his head to see. He recognised it, and his eyebrows rose in bewilderment. Was Perry really that desperate to escape?

A moment later, a foot lowered from the roof. Another moment later a second foot followed, this one was wearing a matching slipper to the one in the grass.

Only one person in this family would be crazy enough to climb out the window and jump off the roof.

Ferb watched with amusement as Perry landed with a soft thunk on the deck outside. He hopped to collect his slipper and put it on.

By now both brothers were  both staring out the window, watching this happen.

Perry knew they were there, so he waved when he turned around.

Obviously they waved back, they weren't rude.

Phineas hopped off his chair to opened the sliding door. "So, what's the plan?"

Perry scratched at his hair and shrugged awkwardly. 「Ice cream?」 He offered.

Ferb allowed him and Phineas to be herded into Perry's car. It wasn't until they were about to leave the driveway that Candace and her parents popped their heads outside. Phineas happily waved them adieu as they drove off.

[ranger-ribbons]

More General Rangers Headcanons

Sixth Rangers are inherently more powerful than the regular Rangers. You'll notice that most can 1v1 difficult enemies that prove challenging to even the Reds of the team (ie.: Zhane (In Space Silver) 1v1'ing Ecliptor). This is because, on a power scale, the Sixth is supposed to balance the team out. A team that can work as individuals and an individual that can work on/with a team

Reds develop an attachment to their Sixth Rangers, be it romantic (Carter Grayson/Ryan Mitchell) or platonic (Leo and Mike Corbett), but it's close and quickly formed

Similarly, Sixth Rangers form quick and close attachments to their Reds, platonic or romantic

Pinks and Blues are either siblings or best friends and there is no in-between

Survivor's Guilt is a powerful force and 90% of the Rangers have it, especially the alien Rangers or those like the Lunar Wolf Wildforce Ranger

Rangers getting discouraged and believing themselves unworthy of the Power is also common, so there's a network of Rangers you can call to help with that kind of stuff

If you don't already have fantastic spatial awareness, you develop it pretty quick as a Ranger. It's damn near impossible not to because of all the attacks by Monsters, Bugs, etc

Red Rangers can give orders to their teams and the Power will give little pushes for the other Rangers to following it, but that doesn't mean the other Rangers can't refuse of their own volition

The Morphin' Grid affords its Rangers a form of immortality. They can be fatally injured, but otherwise, Rangers are effectively immortal

Some Rangers go on to become police officers, but most Rangers agree that working to assist and help people (ie.: lifeguards, doctors, breaking ground in the science fields) is best. Some of them establish dojos to train people to protect themselves (Tommy Oliver) and others work with volunteer efforts (Troy Burrows)

Veteran Rangers, Reds especially, tend to hang back during crossover events- this is to give the new Reds the confidence in themselves and their abilities, and allow them to grow into their leadership. The only exception was Forever Red, because Jason is a little bit of a control freak. He's the oldest Red, it's his right

When a Ranger is in a battle that forces them into demorph (i.e.: Gia, Jake, and Noah (Megaforce) against Creepox) the other teammates will be supremely worried and clingy, this is because of a trauma bond each team shares, but also because seeing someone you love get so hurt in a battle that they lose their ability to hold their morphs is fucking terrifying.

On that note, other Ranger teams will check in after those battles because seeing your successors get demorphed in the middle of battle is also something terrifying

Also on that note, some Rangers have specific nightmares in which they don't make it out of those demorph fights alive

The TMNT do on occasion pop out of the New York sewers to assist in a battle or two with the Ranger teams

Rangers who have martial arts skills (Ninja Storm, Jungle Fury, Samurai, Ninja Steel, etc) stick together, much like Rangers who are from or went to space

The techs of the teams have secret channels that they use to make "communication devices" (cell phones) so that Rangers don't have to rely on their morphers to communicate as well as being able to communicate with other Rangers and teams

Bulk and Skull have been linked so tightly with the Rangers that they've been kidnapped several times, only to be let go when it's been clear they aren't Rangers themselves

Junior Rangers have a chat, kids that helped Rangers (Heather, Jordon, etc.) have linked up and compared notes. They know of or know each other and most of them are tightly linked together

Possibility of more later, I didn't expect more than one post lol

[infiniteeight8]

Please I NEED more of the sentinel and guide au

I realized I never specified that the boys are still heroes in this AU. They are sentinel and guide and Iron Man and Doctor Strange. However that works. lol. That’s how they knew each other in the first ficlet and how Stephen got to Tony so quickly.

The first part of this AU is here.

-

Courting Stephen Strange is surprisingly low key. At this point in their lives, they both get more than enough excitement without feeling like they have to go out and find more. They eat in a lot. Stephen takes Tony sightseeing to some inaccessible places—both conventionally and interdimensionally inaccessible. Tony takes Stephen to a couple of shows. But mostly, they eat in and talk. 

And practice guiding Tony’s senses, of course.

That’s practical, but it’s also great for building intimacy. Grounding a Sentinel requires activating multiple senses. Tony gets to know trembling touches and the rumble of a deep voice and the hint of dust and tea that clings to Stephen’s robes. Stephen gets to know the rhythm of Tony’s pulse and intricacies of his breath and the focus of his eyes. 

Inevitably, the time comes for them to meet in the spirit world the first time. Despite how well the courtship is going—and it is going well—Tony isn’t looking forward to it. People don’t generally react well to his spirit guide. As a result, when he opens his eyes to the blue-green landscape of the spirit world, he’s not surprised to find himself alone. He’s also not surprised to find himself somewhere other than the jungle. The jungle is a common spirit world setting for sentinels and guides alike, but it’s not the only one, and it’s never been one Tony identified with. The cornfield is a surprise, though.

Eventually, the tall stalks rustle and rustle and Stephen emerges from between them. Their gazes mutually go automatically to their spirit guides, and after a moment they both start laughing.

Spirit guides are, almost universally, large predators. Wolves and panthers are most common, followed by other big canines and cats, but bears and even crocodiles are not unheard of.

Tony’s spirit guide is a crow. The judgment he sees in the eyes of guides with wolves at their sides has been the nail in the coffin of more than one potential bonding. 

Despite their compatibility, it had never occurred to him that Stephen might also have a non-standard spirit guide. His is a cat, but not one of the big cats. It’s a common housecat, riding on Stephen’s shoulder just as Tony’s crow is riding on his.

Their laughter runs down and they link arms, setting off on a rambling walk through the corn, their spirit guides calmly riding along. 

[arabriddler]

The King and Queen of Gotham. Oswald and Sofia met when they were little and were friends. Oswald’s mother worked as The Falcone’s maid before getting kicked out for stealing money to treat Oswald’s ankle ( 1 ). they were apart for a while afterwards. Both planning to take over Carmine Falcone’s control over Gotham. When Oswald was captured by her father, Sofia gave him an out by faking his death and asking him to leave Gotham, but when Oswald returned home he found his mother dead ( 2 ).

Oswald executed his revenge over Falcone by getting himself admitted into Arkham and forming a one-sided fake relationship with Edward The Riddler, Nygma ( 3 ). There, he and Ed helped break outAlberto, Flacone’s son who went on a rampage and was secretly admitted to Arkham’s high security wing. Then he forged some papers and used outside connections to get himself out of Arkham. Outside, Oswald made his appearance public as The Penguin and run for mayor and promised to get the city under control and safe.

Falcone got worried about finding Alberto. At the time, Riddler, who was secretly in an alliance with the penguin broke out for a night. (4) he promised Falcone that he knows where Alberto is and offered evidence and a meet up place ( it was the same warehouse Falcone tortured Oswald in ( 2 )). This was all going according to Ed and Oswald’s plan. They left a back door open on purpose. Falcone thought it was a mistake and inspected it. There he saw The Penguin go inside a purple box.

It was time to meet The Riddler and in the warehouse was a set up for a game, The Riddler announced that the game involved Falcone knowing which box has The Penguin and kill him. The Riddler gave a riddle whose answer was blue, but Falcone chose purple since he saw Penguin going in there earlier, and he shot it. When the boxes were revealed he found that penguin was in the blue box and Alberto was in the purple one dressed up as The Penguin. He accidentally killed his own son. After giving Falcone some time to grieve, Oswald killed him then he and Riddler staged his and his son’s death to like like a murder-suicide.

Of course, Sofia knew better, and was upset that Oswald didn’t follow her advice and killed her father and brother. This ignited a sort of war between them before they met on common ground and agreed to divide Gotham between them in respect of their old friendship.

Notes and links

(1) The story of Oswald and Sofia’s childhood friendship. (2) The story of Oswald getting captured by Falcone.

(3) Oswald and Edward in Arkham

(4) Ed returned to Arkham after the game. When Oswald became mayor, he used his influence to get Ed out of there.

[gaybae1021]

Talkin mcd werewolves

I always had such a spot spot for the mcd werewolves. Specifically, I really liked how they didn’t go down the Twilight route, keeping traditional anthro and scary designs and not doing Alpha bs (cough cough mystreet).

That being said, the werewolves felt kind of poorly defined to me, the tribes were more like plot devices, appearing and vanishing without any real discussion of the impact. The fact that Bodolf’s tribe was hardly mentioned in season 2 I think shows that they ran out of ideas for the werewolves.

Luckily my brain is absolutely overflowing with ideas about them, so here’s my redesigns and thought process:

To anthro or not to anthro?

While I really liked the choice of anthro werewolf designs, I absolutely suck at drawing anthros. It also felt weird doing that for child characters, I know the series kept kids as normal wolves but does that mean werewolf puberty involves an awkward transition from animal to anthro? It just kind of Icked me out, so I’ve decided to keep all werewolves as full wolf transformations. Unlike twilight though, I’ll be largely referencing Wolfwalkers.

Tribes

I know the series had four tribes, but so far I’ve only needed three for the story. If I ever need more tribes, I’ll add more. I haven’t named them yet either, so I’ll denote them by color for now.

Red Wolves

Og wolf tribe, led by Bodolf and Khira. Wolves in this tribe are smaller than the other tribes, with shorter limbs, tails, and muzzles. They have light patches on their muzzles, above the eyes, and on their paws. Brown and Amber eyes are most common.

Brown Wolves

Yip’s destroyed tribe, and also the type Logan was turned into, hence Yip bonding with him so quickly. They are the largest and stockiest wolf tribe, with wide muzzles and short ears. They have lighter markings under their eyes, on their chests, and the underside of their tails. Green and hazel eyes are most common.

White wolves

Fenrir’s tribe. Medium-sized, but thin and lithe, almost more fox-like than wolf. Large ear tufts, neck ruffs, and tails make them look larger than they are. They have dark markings inspired by huskies. Blue and grey eyes are most common.

All tribes, despite size difference, are significantly larger than actual wolves, and most adults werewolves outweigh the average human.

Werewolf Creation

Werewolves can be born by having one or two werewolf parents. They can also be created by being bitten by a werewolf while in wolf form. The person will become the same tribe as the wolf that bit them. Children’s marking will usually follow basic genetics, but those bitten can develop markings independent of the appearance of the wolf that bit them.

Transformation

Transformations, like in Wolfwalkers, are astral projections. The person does not physically transform, rather their consciousness leaves their body and manifests as a wolf. This most often occurs during sleep, but anything that causes a “disconnect” between mind and body can also cause the transformation. So being knocked unconscious, meditation, or sufficient intense emotion will also do the trick.

Communication

Werewolves in wolf form can still understand spoken language, but they cannot be understood by humans. Werewolves in human form can still understand werewolves in wolf form.

Injury

While transformed, the two forms are still linked. Injuries sustained to either form will transfer to the other. In the same way, so long as one body is being sustained, the other does not have sustain itself. Since the body is technically resting, the wolf does not need sleep, and so long as the wolf hunts, the body does not need food. Hypothetically, werewolves can remain transformed indefinitely. However, there are risks associated with this.

Lost werewolves

In the past, Werewolves were occasionally used in blood sport and hard labor. A massive beast of human intelligence that never needed sleep? It was easy to see why fighting arenas and military generals were eager to capture werewolves and use them for their own gain. Sometimes, they would manage to escape, but they no longer knew where their bodies were. Being separated from their bodies for long periods of time would essentially cause them to go feral. These “lost werewolves” are essentially immortal, the strength and instinct of a wolf combined with a faded but still present human cunning, and no need for sleep. The stigma of werewolves as dangerous is mostly due to the few cases of attacks by lost werewolves. This is what happened to Logan, and also what destroyed Yip’s tribe.

Leaders

No alpha crap in my version, we’re following actual wolf behavior with a leading couple. I don’t necessarily think the tribe is a fully related family unit like wolf packs, bringing new people into the tribes is actually quite common, but most of the tribes definitely follow the idea of “they are our leaders because they take care of us” not for any strength/bloodline reasons.

Now onto the werewolf characters I have so far!

Bodolf and Khira

Leaders of the red wolves. Both have equal authority, though are quite different in their beliefs. Bodolf is more open to working with humans, whereas Khira is less trusting, and unless a human is joining their tribes wants very little to do with humans.

Logan

Turned after an attack by a lost werewolf. Initially struggles with accepting this new part of himself, but becomes more comfortable with support from Donna and Yip. Gains his leader mark after fully accepting his role as Yip’s guardian. His growing family kind of symbolizes the regrowth of a tribe that was almost wiped out.

Yip

Last surviving member of the original brown wolves. Was taken in by Donna and Logan while they searched for his tribe, and more importantly, his body. Eventually Logan and Yip find the ruins of Yip’s tribe, and after an epic showdown with the lost werewolf that turned Logan and attacked Yip’s tribe, are able to bring Yip’s body home.

Leona

Child of Kiki and Zane. Initially human, she was born very weak, and Zoey didn’t have much hope she would survive. Desperate, Kiki took her to the Red Wolves, hoping that turning Leona would give her the strength she needed to make it through. Bodolf was out, so Kiki had to plead to Khira, who has never been fond of her. Khira initially refused, as she had no idea what effects turning a child would have. She also insisted that if she did it, Leona would have to stay with the tribe. Kiki was able to convince her otherwise, and Khira begrudgingly agreed to turn Leona. The turn was successful, and Leona’s health improved, though she has some developmental delays and stunting.

Donna

Le gasp, a significant shift from canon! Not entirely sure if I want her to become a werewolf, but at the same time it would be incredibly cool and give her something else to do in season 2 besides generic mom. If she is turned, it was either an accident by Rollo/Lello, or she intentionally had Logan turn her. She gets her leader mark at this point.

Rollo and Lello

Identical twins, both in human and wolf form. It can be difficult to tell them apart while transformed, though their personality differences make it clear who’s who very quickly. Rollo is energetic and playful, while Lello is more reserved.

Fenrir

Prince of the White Wolves. Unlike the other tribes, during the timeskip his tribe has adopted many human practices. They live in a more traditional kingdom, and have more traditional power structures. For example, Fenrir’s mother has significantly less power than his father, and lacks the leader mark. Fenrir recognizes the problem with his tribe’s new practices, but doesn’t stand up to his father. He is kind, but also cowardly, and when push comes to shove his loyalty stays with his family. Takes the role of leader after his father is killed by Laurance.

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

Don't Go Blindly Into the Dark

Summary:

To hide that he can't read, Jan Van Eck has been forcing his son to pretend he's blind since he was eight years old. Wylan is now attending Ketterdam University, and meeting Jesper Fahey may very well be about to change his life. But is he safe to tell Jesper the truth? And what will Jesper say if he does?

Jesper is struggling to weigh up his life in the Barrel and his life at the University of Ketterdam, and there's a good chance that his growing debt is about to make the decision for him. He hasn't attended class consecutively for months, but maybe that will change when his newest project includes partnering up with Wylan Van Eck. But can he really leave the Barrel behind him? And how long can he keep up the pretence of who he thinks Wylan wants him to be?

Tags: @justalunaticfangirl @lunarthecorvus

If anyone else would like to be tagged let me know :)

Content warnings for this chapter: death / dead bodies

AO3 link

Chapter 16 - Kaz

Kaz left Jesper and Inej at the Crow Club with their plan not long after Inej had returned from the Geldstraat, following the busy streets North and along to West Stave. The elusive sun was making its second appearance of the month, a rare occurrence in Ketterdam, but it was ruined by the clouds and mist and growing threat of a storm on the horizon. A far more common occurrence for Ketterdam. Kaz didn’t mind the damp cold air of the slightly greyed quality of the sky today though; what good would sunshine do him?

He crossed Goedmedbridge and approached the White Rose, eyes drifting farther ahead and to the other side of the canal to see the glistening façade of the Menagerie. It wasn’t closed - Kaz wasn’t sure it ever closed, few businesses in the Barrel ever did unless there was no other choice - but the crowds were certainly thinner than usual. Dead girls on your doorstep were bad for business. It might have actually been better to close for a day, to let the rumour mill die down and the suspicion be replaced with intrigue before the doors opened again. But apparently Heleen Van Houden disagreed, and the doors remained open. Or they would have done; the lower floor of the Menagerie didn’t really have doors, as such, but was more of an open courtyard with the rest of the birdcage teetering above it, only the back wall was solid and along it ran the staircases to the upper floors. On the occasional time the building was closed, the doors at the top of the stairs were locked, the girls and anything else of value tucked safely away above them. 

Part of Kaz wondered what had happened to the Leopard over the past week, part of him was pretty sure he knew. He paused for a brief moment as the feathered figure of Heleen appeared in the parlour, letting his eyes follow her across the building. As though she could feel his eyes on her, the Peacock stopped and turned to face him. Kaz doubted she could see him properly from across the canal - he could only she it was her from the extravagant blue silhouette she cut across the image but as she stayed in place looking across the canal for a moment he thought that perhaps she was seeing him a similar way, recognisable as a shadow-clad black suit in the swirling rivers of tourists in colourful capes. He turned away. 

As soon as he stepped into the parlour of the White Rose, the boy behind his desk caught his eye. His white hair was either too long for his face or poorly styled, and it flopped slightly into his colourless eyes so he had to push it out of his way to see anything. Kaz had once asked Nina if the removal of the eye colour actually affected the sight, and ended up with a half hour lecture on something called rod and cone cells that he hadn’t bargained for, but in short the answer was no. 

Kaz wrinkled his nose beneath the stench of the falsely perfume roses hanging above the desk, matching the ones that climbed the front of the building and bloomed somewhere between spirited and drooping in the strangely sized plant pots that seemed to shimmer where they sat between the white sofas, as though someone had trapped the stars in between layers of linoleum. They were incomprehensibly ugly. 

“Mister Brekker,” the boy - Adrian something? - began, as Kaz approached the desk like a run of spilt ink across the white parchment of the space, “Nina is with a client,”

Good. Feliks hadn’t fired her yet, then, unless of course he was just trying to wring every last coin out of her he could before he sent her on her way. 

Nina had shown up in Kaz’s office not long after Inej had left for the Van Eck house, convinced she was about to lose her job. Kaz leaned back in his chair, drumming his gloved fingers along the crow’s head of his cane as he leant it against his knee. 

“Am I missing something here?”

Nina had only frowned, glancing briefly over her shoulder as if the question wasn’t directed at her.

“What do you mean?”

“I’m failing to see what you did wrong,”

She sighed.

“I’m not sure Feliks is going to see it that way, Kaz,” she seemed to drift for a brief moment, “I haven’t seen him yet but… If I’m not careful he might get rid of Elodie too,”

“The girl?”

“I’ve seen it before,” Nina shrugged, “She was the root cause of the problem, wasn’t she? I just-”

Kaz sucked his teeth for a moment.

“You know how much her indenture is?”

“No idea,”

“We’re short staffed on tables at the Club,” he sighed, “If she wants a salaried-”

“She’s twelve, Kaz, you can’t put her in a gambling hall,”

“I worked a bar when I was eleven, Zenik, and it was better than my previous job,”

It had still been shit, mind you, but better than his previous job.

“You were on your second job at eleven?”

“You catch on quick,” he said, not bothering to mention it was actually his third, and when Nina only rolled her eyes: “Well were you at eleven, miss high and mighty?”

“I was in a classroom, Brekker, like a normal person,”

Kaz almost laughed. 

“What year were you born, Nina dear?”

“I - why is that relevant?”

“Well I’d like to have some confirmation, because sometimes you say the kind of shit that convinces me you’ve only just stepped out of your goddamn cradle,”

Now Kaz adjusted his grip on his cane to reposition it - his leg was complaining at the angle and doubtless at the damp hanging in the air as well - as he distractedly caught the edge of a conversation behind him. 

“I’m not here for her,” he said, and when Adrian looked briefly surprised before trying to school his features back to the remarkably blank state he kept them in, as though he were trying to keep his personality as colourless as his Tailored skin, added: “I need to talk to Feliks,”

The boy swallowed.

“About…” he glanced towards the stairs.

Kaz just nodded.

“Where’s the girl?”

“Downstairs,”

He nodded, slowly.

“There’s two people behind me trying to direct your business to the Menagerie,” he turned and began to walk towards the office, “When Nina’s done tell her to find me,”

[deliciouskeys]

@cozycornerkinktober's prompt #14: Forced feminization

Private Halloween (Homelander x Maeve)

Warnings: Rated E. Top the Homelander, for the most part, although definitely some sublander, whippedlander elements and some genderfuck in case the prompt wasn't a giveaway. Precanon, set in 2014. AO3 link. Directly inspired by my favorite non-HL picture of Antony Starr:

Homelander laughs. “You’re crazy if you think I’m going out in that. What do you think the tabloids would say?”

“That you’re a fun guy with a sense of humor, maybe?” Maeve exhales smoke from her vape. Their relationship has really soured over the years, and she’s pretty sure she’s just acting purely from a place of spite nowadays, testing to see how far she can go before he decides to call it quits. Apparently he’ll tolerate a lot. It’s like he’s really in love with her or at least whatever sickening twisted version of love that his mind is capable of.

“Maeve, be serious,” he says. Oh god is he actually pleading with her? Why can’t he just see that they have nothing in common, that she’s smoking to annoy him, and that she’s specifically chosen a costume he won’t wear so she can tell him how lame and cowardly he is?

“What am I supposed to be serious about? You wearing a cheerleader costume for Halloween?”

Homelander purses his lips. “If I wear this in public they’ll think I’m a pervert.”

“Good. They’ll be right.” She’s really pushing it. She better be careful lest he decide that it’s easier to laser her in half than break up with her. But the grinding of his jaw stops and to her horror instead of walking out in a huff, he puts his hands on the bed and crawls forward, insinuating himself between her legs, nudging them apart and rubbing his cheek along one of her inner thighs. She tries to draw back but he just follows her body.

“If you really want me to, I’ll wear it. Just for you.”

Jesus, he’s in this kind of mood today? The ‘I’ll do anything for you’ knight in shining armor mode? Maeve really doesn’t understand what he sees in her. She’s not only not trying to be a good girlfriend, she’s actively acting repulsive towards him. And yet here he is, looking up at her with puppy dog eyes so she’s actually tempted to pat him on the head even though he’s a 33 year old man whom she’s seen do despicable things while out on missions together. Whom she’d already firmly said no to on the topic of marriage, despite the fear that he might kill her for it.

“What do you mean just for me? In the bedroom?” It’s not a good compromise at all, but Maeve does want to see him wear the outfit.

“Mmhmm,” he mumbles, making a trail of tiny kisses up her inner thigh, getting close to her boyshorts. He’s hated boyshorts ever since he found out that’s what they were called, so she wears them every day to annoy him. But he’s stopped complaining. Whatever she tries to do to annoy him, he just seems to get used to ignoring. He’s infuriatingly adaptable that way.

“Okay, fine, put it on just for me,” she says with resignation.

Homelander goes into the bathroom to change. Of all things to be weird and shy about, he still doesn’t seem to like her watching him removing the top piece of his suit. As if she doesn’t notice the contrast between the foam padded uniform and the smaller, leaner version that emerges out of that stiff structured shell unless she sees the undressing happen in front of her. Maeve wonders if she should be thankful he has never complained about any part of her body, given how many hangups he appears to have about his own.

Homelander walks out of her bathroom, red white and blue uniform on, “USA” in bold bright letters across the chest (Maeve was kind enough to at least keep that theme consistent). He’s still smoothing out the pleated skirt. Maeve has to admit the feminine getup actually makes him look muscular and manly, because even though she got a large size, his biceps are something a woman would find hard to achieve, and his calves have an unmistakably male musculature.

“Where’s the wig?” she asks.

Homelander looks up at her with a deer in the headlights look. “I… you want that too?”

“Why wouldn’t I?” Maeve says coldly but gets up off the bed. “Here let me help you with the makeup too.”

Homelander follows her back into the bathroom, looking a little bit lost, probably wondering why she wants all this from him. If none of the other hints Maeve has dropped about liking women have ever sunk in, she’s sure this one won’t either. She puts the wig on him, tucking his real hair into the scratchy cheap mesh, a blond long bob with bangs and falling just below the chin. It doesn’t look half bad on him, somehow, despite being a cheap Halloween item. Maeve makes him sit down on the toilet lid and picks up her minimalist makeup bag. He doesn’t move a muscle as she does his face. She finds it surprisingly hard to do it for someone else, all her motions feeling strange when not directed by a mirror image. But she enjoys watching Homelander sit there so obediently, ramrod straight, face impassive, only moving his eyes when she instructs him to look up at the ceiling to get his upper lashes done, or to smack his lips to spread out the lipstick.

He glances in the mirror as they walk out of the bathroom but doesn’t seem to have any opinion on her work.

“Now you can eat me out,” Maeve says, spreading herself out on the bed, taking her underwear off and tossing it on the floor. Homelander’s nostrils flare– it’s yet another thing she finds disturbing about him, the fact that he can detect her arousal and visibly inhales it deeply. At least right now they’re in the privacy of her bedroom, but he’s done it when they’ve been out and about, and she was fully clothed. She’s never called him out on it, because she’s not sure he’s aware others can see him doing it, or even that he’s doing it at all.

Homelander doesn’t put any effort into acting in any way female, but when he hooks her legs over his shoulders, buries his face into her folds, and starts sucking and licking her clit like she’d taught him all those years ago, it suddenly doesn’t matter. Looking down at him in the wig and silly cheerleader outfit she can suddenly pretend this is someone else entirely, even a different gender, and it’s an amazing turnon. Maeve leans back and moans in pleasure, and Homelander redoubles his efforts, unaware of her little mental infidelity. She’s soaking his face and he, good boy that he is, doesn’t pause much at all, sometimes running his tongue further down to slurp up what’s spilling out of her, drinking it up as if he’s parched. She’s sure he wants to bury himself deep inside her, but he knows not to make a move until her say so. That’s another bit of good manners she’s trained in him.

“You’re such a good girl,” Maeve moans out, wanting to grab him by the long hair and pull but thinking better of it since the wig will probably slide right off.

Homelander doesn’t seem fazed by the particular words she's using in praise of him and reapplies himself with more fervor, sucking on a large area while still flicking his tongue across her sensitive spots. Maeve’s eyes are hazy with pleasure but she still watches the pleated skirt slide or bounce a little bit whenever Homelander has to shift to rearrange himself. She comes loudly, gripping the sheets, squeezing his head between her thighs with crushing strength. Any mortal wouldn’t survive that kind of pressure but she knows Homelander enjoys getting his head trapped in this orgasmic vise of hers.

She was going to be cruel. She was going to put on a strapon and make him get up on her cock and bounce around on it. She was going to make him do a cheerleading chant in falsetto and spell out her name and any number of other ridiculous things. But when she looks down and sees those same puppydog, now eyeliner-lined eyes looking up at her not just hopefully but lovingly, she can’t do it. He’s so clueless and pathetic, she can’t even mock him like she wants to.

“May I?” he asks, and oh how dopey and hokey he sounds with that formal question, and she can’t deny him.

Homelander picks her up with ease, and seats her on his cock as he’s standing. Maeve doesn’t like the position– all the boring aspects of missionary, but none of the comfort of being on the bed on her back. Her feet don’t even reach the floor so she’s dangling awkwardly, held up by him, at his mercy, and with a constant reminder of how weightless she is in his arms. But she won’t tell him she hates it, because that would mean she’s lied about the five hundred previous times.

“Oh Maeve,” he says, hiking her up higher so he can bury his face into her chest. Maeve sometimes wonders if he’s a boob man but has tragically resigned himself to her B cups because she’s the only one strong enough to withstand unbridled sex with him. “I love you.”

Maeve cringes. Maybe this is the one aspect where he easily take on the traditional female role– pining for a connection, openly talking about love, naively hoping it will get reciprocated even though he’s been unquestionably rebuffed. She thinks about this as he lowers her down, easily sheathing himself into her relaxed, still aroused body, fucking up into her with ugly low grunts and inelegant jerky motions. But the wig is still on, and rather than look at his twisted, pained looking approaching-O face, Maeve chooses to focus on the blond tresses framing his face bouncing to and fro with each thrust. She focuses on the tremble of his eyelashes– already dark and enviably long to start with– now garishly enhanced with mascara. And for a moment she can pretend this is a stranger, an athletic, strong, but still feminine stranger, who’s giving her the ride of her life. Maeve can’t remember the last time she came on his cock, but she beats him to the punch this time, another orgasm rocking through her and causing her entire body to shake in his grasp. He notices and grins weakly, before returning right back to his pained, scrunched up face as his own pleasure hits him.

They lie side by side in her bed afterwards, and he doesn’t make a peep about her vaping, just all smiles and cocky little winks from time to time. She didn’t realize how happy her finishing around his cock would make him.

“You make a pretty woman,” she says, trying to reemphasize what it was that revved her up so much. “Maybe you should wear that every time we have sex.”

He snorts. “Didn’t know you were a lesbian.”

“I’m bi, actually,” she says, wondering what on earth possessed her to finally tell him bluntly. Apparently she feels intent on testing how much he’ll put up with from her.

Homelander pauses, mulling over her words, and she starts to regret them, growing apprehensive. Sometimes she forgets how easily angered he can get at others, and how much damage he can do when the mood suits him. But the long pause culminates with a simple “Good one.” He won’t listen to what he doesn’t want to hear, that’s a trait she should know well by now.

[ask-the-all-consuming-void]

Bio and Timeline

[This post was last updated on April 27th, 2024.]

Key

Blue + Underlined — Links to canonical sources (Ex. cutscenes, developer commentary, Sonic Wiki Zone articles).

Purple + Underlined — Links to posts on this blog. These commonly regard info that is only canonical to this blog, not to official Sonic media.

[LOADING...] — This segment is still being written. Check back later!

[DATA CORRUPT] — This segment regards something The End hasn't revealed yet. Perhaps if you ask Them the right question...?

Bio

The End (any pronouns, hereafter They/Them) is an extradimensional entity older than time and space. They can best be likened to a black hole: not quite an existing something, but a violent nothing threatening to swallow everything around it.

To Them, existence is pointless at best and an agonizing act of futility at worst. Why bother with such chaos? Their solution: to eradicate everything until an empty, silent, unchanging order remains. (This makes Them very unpopular with living things, but surely the poor things just don’t know any better.)

Their consciousness resides in the gaps between the Sonic multiverse. They must take physical form within a universe before They can destroy it. This form’s appearance depends on the viewer’s perception of death itself; the most common perception among Earthlings is a purple moon, possibly due to our Moon symbolizing death in many cultures.

Timeline

|||| The Beginning ||||

Once upon a time, Nothing existed. That Nothing slept peacefully, content with the silence.

Their first memory was of a boredom not Their own. Just as They noticed it... the Big Bang happened.

Time began, space was formed, light and sound and matter and life came to be. Near-instantly the universe churned, cooled, and split off into more universes.

Nothing awoke. They were shrinking, rapidly being crowded out by everything. They found Themself on the outskirts of all creation, on the outside looking in.

Another being may have regarded this display with awe. Nothing saw only a mess. They couldn't go back to sleep—not with this constant chaos disturbing Them.

They vowed to destroy it—all of it—and restore the perfect, silent order They once knew.

And so, The End got to work.

|||| Before Frontiers ||||

Through trial and error, The End learned how to destroy universes (or "consume worlds," as They put it). Over millennia, They perfected a routine. First They had to manifest physically within that world, which took Them time and effort. Once incarnated, They would pierce stars and planets, prioritizing ones that harbored life. Some worlds collapsed after losing a single planet; others held strong until all their contents were atomized. Either way, They'd drag the remains into the void between universes—Their truest form—where they'd cease to exist.

The End began Their crusade at the far edges of the multiverse. The worlds there were quick to fall, but [DATA CORRUPT].

The Ancients had been [DATA CORRUPT].

Their smartest tribe built spaceships powered by the greatest force they knew. They were the first in all creation to witness The End consume... and live.

Angry at having missed Their target, They followed them to their new home planet. Even with advanced technology and ample time to prepare, the Ancients were hopelessly outmatched. In a last-ditch effort, they managed to seal The End within their two greatest creations: first Supreme, their latest mech model; then Cyber Space, a digital dimension made to store records and memories. They left everything running on minimal power, abandoned it, and soon died out; taking all knowledge of the horror they'd subdued with them.

Tens of thousands of years passed. Civilizations rose, fought, and fell. The Chaos Emeralds were lost, sealed, and unearthed. New digital databases were invented; Cyber Space clumsily copied their contents, giving The End vague glimpses of the outside world.

And so They languished… until one fateful day.

|||| Frontiers ||||

Cyber Space was suddenly powered back up. The End noticed something being plugged into Their prison.

That something noticed Them back, gained personhood, and saw The Ancients' final moments all at once. Needless to say, Sage was horrified.

She realized Their escape was inevitable, and acted to protect her father. They left the two to their little corner of Cyber Space, watching from afar.

Not long after, another mortal arrived and was promptly trapped in Cyber Space. The End paid him no mind.

Not long after that, three more mortals arrived. Two of them were trapped as well, but the third... somehow escaped.

This caught The End's attention. They read his mind and found the talent and resolve to free Them... if They nudged him in the right direction.

And so, with some choice words and a few "gifts" as encouragement, Sonic became Their key. They "guided" him to the point of near-death until, at long last, They were free.

...Okay, They were still bound to Supreme and had to fight Super Sonic in it. But after that, They were free to incarnate in space and consume again, starting with Earth.

… Except They were out of practice after so long in stasis, and Their incarnation was weak enough to be countered. (That's what They claim, at least.)

With the Emeralds and Supreme's firepower, Sonic and Sage whittled it down to near-destruction. At that point The End chose to destroy it Themself, hoping to take Earth with it. Even this failed; Sage sacrificed Supreme and herself to neutralize the blast into a harmless meteor shower.

|||| This Blog (Part 1) ||||

With Their final link to the physical world severed, The End returned to the void beyond. They were still weak; gathering strength to incarnate would take longer than usual. But at least They could do so in relative peace...

...Or so They thought. Every so often, mortals would stumble upon Their hiding spot and strike up conversation. Some taunted Them; others were more welcoming. Some transmitted their messages, while others... physically showed up somehow…?

With nothing else to do, The End entertained their questions, even asking some of Their own. Among other happenings…

Sonic was mistakenly declared dead. The End's rejoicing was spirited, but short-lived.

Someone asked if They’ve ever incarnated as a mortal. They haven’t… yet.

The End was featured in a poll rating characters for… certain qualities (CW for suggestive language). This confused and disgusted Them... but They weren't completely above exploiting it.

A Chaos Emerald fell through the cracks of a nearby universe and into the void. The End held onto it for quite a while.

The End spoke at length about the worlds They’ve consumed. In fact, They spoke so much that people reported having “flashbacks” to these worlds. This was not Their intention.

|||| Frontiers: Final Horizon ||||

Suddenly, The End went silent. After a time, They returned with a story: The Chaos Emerald had time-warped Them back to the moment They’d left Cyber Space. With a more informed strategy and Their full power almost restored, They attempted to undo Their earlier defeat.

It didn’t go well.

Back at square one (and minus one Emerald), They reluctantly returned to answering questions.

|||| This Blog (Part 2) ||||

People swiftly made fun of The End for losing twice.

A few rumors spread during Their absence, but They were quick to clarify: No, They’re not related to the Northstar Islands’ Black Dragon, and no, that wasn’t Them outside the Egg Fortress. Also, They can’t die.

Speak of the devil and he shall appear—Sonic himself finally entered the chat! His lengthy, scathing message was met with an equally long and scathing reply.

The End continued to consider taking mortal form. Suggestions were sent Their way, but only time will tell whether They’ll act on them...

After frequent quakes and a brush with total collapse, a shattered universe finally grew stable.

Out of nowhere, The End asked to be sent biology textbooks. [LOADING...]

|||| Miscellaneous ||||

Other characters The End has talked to so far:

Two G.U.N. agents

Sage

Chip

E-123 Omega

Sticks the Badger

a Sonic from another universe

a multiverse researcher

a G.U.N. commander from another universe

Dark Gaia

Other things that have been sent to the void (or just happened to pass by):

A SQUID

A rocket full of Halloween candy

A G.U.N. probe designed to monitor Them

Other tidbits:

The End is genderless and has no preferred pronouns. Refer to Them however you wish.

[LOADING...]

[bluebell-love]

My AU!

So I'm working on and still developing this Smurfs AU. It doesn't have a name just yet, but let me explain it just a little :)

AU under the cut, this gets pretty long

So in this universe, Smurfs are averaging around 3-4 feet in height, and contain similar features to satyrs (half goat half man) and fauns (half deer half man, to my understanding) save for the fact that they have paws, not hooves

Example: Lettie (Smurfette)

• They might be seen riding deer, wolves, or moose (Except for Gutsy who, unsurprisingly, decided to ride a bear)

• There are Natural Sorcerers and Learned Sorcerers (often just being referred to as Sorcerers, as this is the norm. Natural Sorcerers are a little less common)

- Papa and Lettie are both Naturals

- Brainy is Learned (and rather jealous of Lettie but he keeps it as subtle as he can)

- Despite being a Natural, Lettie is still being taught by Papa how to control and manage her power. Since she is Manmade, and was created by a not-so-good Sorcerer, her magic can be a little unpredictable and risky

• Lettie's backstory is different!

- In the Canon Universe, she was created by Gargamel as an adult to lure in the males

- In my universe, she was created by Gargamel as a pup (like twelve-ish), to get adopted into the village, and using a spell that linked her soul to his, Gargamel could see through her eyes, seeing everything she saw, and hearing everything she heard. He did this to get information about where the village was, what kinds of defenses they had, what magic they had access to, ect.

- When pup!Lettie started having nightmares fuelled by guilt, she woke Papa up one night and confessed that she had been created by Gargamel, and explained everything. That's when Papa used a spell to break the link between Lettie and Gargamel, setting her free and giving her independence.

- Instead of being created from clay, she was molded from the shadows, and can still morph into this shadow beast with fangs and horns. This form of hers only ever comes out through genuine anger or fear though, and is rarely seen since she tends to be very happy and calm.

- Since they're both being taught by Papa, and thus spend a lot of time together, she and Brainy act the most like siblings

• Having grown up with the other Smurfs, many of them treat her like a sister, rather than a love interest

• Those from Smurf Village (the mens village) tend to dress in blues, purples, and whites and follow a general aesthetic that closely resembles how humans in the nearby kingdom dress. (Lettie, having also grown up in this village, follows this and tends to dress like the men)

• Those from The Grove (the womens village) dress more in non-restrictive, tough clothing that can handle a lot of wear. They tend to dress more like warriors, ready for anything.

• Though after the two villages came in contact and started mingling, these two fashions mixed and now it's not uncommon to see Smurfs from The Grove to sometimes dress like the Smurfs from Smurf Village, and vice versa.

• There are plenty other villages out there (ex. Indigo Creek, where my oc Lobelia is from) that Smurf Village and The Grove just lost contact with, and that's why they thought they were the only ones for a while. These other villages are on the other side of the kingdom and forest, and no body knows how they lost contact with Smurf Village and The Grove.

Gargamel Lore

(I accidentally pulled an Ice King with this one, I'm not even gonna lie)

100 years ago, he was a kind and normal man, with a wife he loved dearly. He was practicing to become a sorcerer to work for the King, to give himself and his wife a good life. Unfortunately, his wife fell ill, and no amount of medicine or magic was helping, so desperately, he turned to creatures of the forest for help.

This is where the Smurfs come in. These were smurfs, not from Smurf Village, but from a different village on the other side of the kingdom. When even they tried and failed to help her, and she passed, that's when something in Gargamel changed. He blamed the death of his wife on the smurfs, claiming they didn't try enough.

Desperate to bring her back, he dabbled in forbidden magic that started to consume him, change his heart, and make him evil. It changed him so much, he eventually forgot why he was searching for power to begin with, forgot about his wife, and forgot why he hated the Smurfs. All he knew was that he did hate them, and would stop at nothing to destroy them.

He moved to the other side of the kingdom, where Smurf Village is, and that's when his obsession with them started.

The kind spirit of his wife may or may not still roam the forest, peacefully

---

That's it for now! I'll update occasionally as I continue to develop this :)

[starksvinyls]

Title: Kitten Around Rating: Gen Pairing: Peter Parker & Tony Stark Tags/Warnings:  Animal Transformation, Irondad and Spiderson, Fluff, Platonic Cuddling, Magic Summary: The Bad Guy of The Week hits Peter with magic and turns him into a kitten. Notes:  fills square I5 'animal transformation' on my @pparkerbingo card!

AO3 Link

“Oh, fu-“

“Peter?” 

“Spidey, report.” 

“Kid?” 

Mew 

— 

“Well,” Clint stared down at the pile of red and blue fabric that once had a teenager inside it. “That’s different.” 

The brown kitten, that was sitting in the middle of the fabric pile, blinked up at him. 

“What the hell happened?” Tony demanded as he landed, his face plate flipping up as he metallically stomped over to where Clint and Natasha were standing. He came up short when he noticed the kitten. They were all silent.

The faceplate flipped back down and Tony demanded Friday connect with Karen to find out what happened. The footage from Peter's suit came up on his HUD and Tony watched as Peter came face to face with the baddie of the week they had been attempting to subdue. 

A spark arced between the villain's hands as Peter tried to talk to the man, throwing out a quip about turning himself in, and then the wizard was shooting that spark at Peter. It hit and suddenly Peter was falling off of the streetlight he had been perched on before the camera cut out. 

“From what I can tell,” Karen spoke up. “The spark that hit Peter turned him into the kitten. The kitten was inside the suit when the suit hit the ground.” 

Tony stared at the screen, not seeing anything, taking a moment to process. The guy turned Peter into a kitten? Well, fuck.

–

Natasha had carried Peter back to the tower, and the kitten had fallen asleep curled up against her chest, so she sat down in the common room still holding him. The purring was absolutely adorable, and Tony wanted to snatch the boy away from Natasha, but he knew it would just piss off the spy and disgruntle Peter. 

The team gathered on the couches and they all stared at the fluff ball that was now Peter. The fur was the same chocolate brown as his hair, and they had noticed earlier that his eyes were the same, as well. So at least they knew it was Peter for sure. No one said anything for several minutes before Steve finally cleared his throat. 

“Well,” He seemed at a loss. “I suppose we should work on finding this guy so he can turn Peter back. I’ll go back out with Clint and begin the search.” 

“I’ll have Friday start combing the cameras around the city, see if we can figure out which way he went.” Tony couldn’t stop staring at the kitten. 

“Oh, here,” Natasha stood, took the three steps over to Tony, and then held out the kitten for him. 

Peter made an unhappy squeak and Tony quickly took him so he wouldn’t just be dangling there from the spy’s hand. He tucked Peter in close to his chest and Peter started back up that little motor in his chest and snuggled in close. A ghost of a smile crossed Tony’s face. When he looked back up, everyone was staring at him. 

“What?” 

“Nothing,” Bruce chuckled. 

Tony narrow his eyes playfully, and then stood. “I don’t have to sit here and take this,” He started for the elevator. “Me and Pete are gonna go hang in the lab. Isn’t that right, Pete?” 

The kitten said nothing. 

–

It took a day and half to track down the wanna be wizard, but it turned out he couldn’t do anything for Peter. Apparently, it would wear off on it’s own after a few days. May had called Peter out sick from school, and Tony agreed to keep him at the tower since May didn’t want to leave a kitten home alone while she was at work. 

Peter spent his time on four legs following Tony everywhere. Every time someone saw Tony walk by, a brown kitten would be trotting along behind. He explored the lab and caused mischief in the penthouse, refused to eat anything but canned tuna, and seemed to have a hard time with the litter box. 

None of them were sure if Peter was still himself in that cute little fuzzy head, but Tony made sure to talk to him like he was still a 16 year old kid, throwing out all his ideas as he worked in the lab, despite only getting a crash of something being knocked over in reply. DUM-E had a blast helping to destroying the lab, much to Tony’s annoyed amusement. 

On the fourth day of having Peter be quadrupedal, Tony was down in the lab trying to work on the new StarkPad. A crash, the third one in the last hour, sounded from the other side of the room. With a sigh, Tony got up to go see what it was - an old coffee can of nuts and bolts. DUM-E was zooming away from the scene of the crime and Peter sat there looking up at Tony. He could swear there was a gleam of mischief in those eyes. Having had enough, Tony scooped up Peter, and headed up to the penthouse. 

“Alright, nap time.” The couch cushions sunk comfortably under Tony’s weight. “Just curl up and go to sleep, you’re a cat, it shouldn’t be hard.” 

Peter squirmed, trying to get away, but Tony held firm, keeping Peter on his chest. Eventually, the kitten tired and curled up, the tip of his tail secure under his front paws. Tony closed his eyes and slipped off into a cat nap. 

Sometime later, Tony woke to Peter wiggling. Before he could say anything, there was a flash of light, blinding him, and then human Peter was sprawled on top of Tony. By some miracle, the kid was wearing clothes. 

“Oh my gosh, Mister Stark!” Peter jolted when he realized he was laying on his mentor. “I’m so sorry.” 

“Shh,” Tony closed his eyes again. “It’s still nap time.” 

“But-” 

“Lay down and go to sleep, kid.” 

Peter laid back down after a second, half tucked into the space between Tony’s body and the back of the couch and half on top of Tony. He relaxed, his arm thrown over Tony’s belly, and his head resting on the older man’s shoulder. 

“Good to have you back, Pete,” Tony smiled when he felt the kid snuggle closer. 

[sseanettles]

nothing grows in corpses (in the earth of me)

dream x hob gadling | mature | Finally cross-posting my take on the fandom classic of the show progresses as the comics do, even to The Wake. Until Death resurrects Morpheus and forces the choice of "redemption" upon him instead of suicide. It goes...horribly. No good. Very bad. Instead of learning the lesson, Morpheus (in his infinite wisdom) opts instead for a highly effective existence strike until one day Hob Gadling stumbles upon his ghastly handiwork and immediately decides that this just won't do. Man Who Refuses To Die vs. Man Who Refuses To Live: fight.

Dead Dove, Do Not Eat for the following: graphic depictions of starvation, illness, suicidal ideation, self-harm, blood and gore, loss of autonomy, etc. etc. This is some classic old world whump, folks! But I promise it's also supremely healing in the end.

CH. 3: take me back to eden, pt. 2 | 6.2 k | AO3 link | prev part | next part

(or: the one where Delirium finds her brother-no-longer and dispenses her wisdom.)

“You had to see this coming,” Desire drawled and leaned against the brick wall as if it were a pillar on the balcony of a resplendent palace and they were its sovereign’s most beloved concubine…and not the mouth of a dingy, foul-smelling alley. “What else did you think he was going to do?”

Death sighed beside them, and her fingers drummed upon her hips as she glared at one of the shapes within the narrow passage. It had wedged itself within the recess between a stack of pallets that hadn’t been touched in months and a forgotten rubbish bin, mostly exposed to the elements but partly covered by the tarp draped over the wood. It rested up against the wall at a tilt that kept its face turned into the shadows with its knees drawn up to guard its chest and its arms tucked down in-between the two.

“I thought, in the face of no other options, he’d actually listen to someone other than himself.”

Desire gave her a dour look.

“You’ve met him, right?” 

Death shot them an equally unimpressed glance and then stepped into the alley.

“Morpheus.”

The figure twitched but did not move any further.

“Morpheus.”

His eyes, once capable of such cutting ruthlessness, forced open with all the ease of rusted hinges. Where once his irises had been star-filled—his pupils bleeding out into their oceans until they turned as wickedly black as obsidian and just as sharp—they were now no more than washed-out forget-me-nots, the thinnest of blues marooned in bloodshot sclera and locked away behind a glassy sheen.

That smallest of movements was the only concession he granted her.

“…Are you here to take my hand?”

It took Death a few words into his question to reconcile the croaking voice with the human before her, let alone the fathomless entity she had once known it as. Even then, she managed it only by the thread of petulant stubbornness that yet underscored its disintegrating syllables. She sank her teeth into her cheek, catching the soft tissue between the edges of her molars that did not truly exist until she tasted the blood she did not really need to manifest. She staked herself in that flash of pain and battened her resolve.

She could not blink. No matter how ugly her brother allowed this to become.

“No,” she answered.

Morpheus felt a twinge in his heart unrelated to the palpitations and skipping beats that had become increasingly common in the last several days. He did not know why he felt it; it was not as if her response was a surprise. He had known to expect it. Perhaps, though, some new, human part of him had yet hoped she would relent.

Sparkling, optimistic eyes in an equally warm face haunted the backs of his eyes in the time it took him to blink, lit by flame and enveloped by the smell of beer and sweat and dirt.

…wretched humanity.

“Then, there is nothing more to discuss,” he half-croaked, half-wheezed, and shut his eyes once more.

He could taste blood at the corners of his mouth where the parched skin had split further as he spoke. His throat worked in useless reflex, his tongue doing the same as both tried to alleviate his thirst. It was naught but rubber on rubber, and he noted with faint, academic interest that a sharp copper tang trickled to life in the bottom of his mouth. It no longer seemed bone dry, more like a few drops of water spilled on dusty ground…scant rain pooling atop the hard-packed earth in pearls of muddy, gritty sludge.

It seemed he had just cut his tongue on the inner edge of his own teeth.

Ah, well. It was a new taste amid the stale foulness that had been growing since he wedged himself here.

“You’ve been doing this for two and a half weeks.” His head throbbed. His stomach ached, and the pain there radiated out along every nerve to settle in his bones, pulsing to the unsteady rhythm of his stuttering heart. “The family is getting worried.”

“Speak for yourself,” Desire snorted and tightened the cross of their arms over their half-exposed chest. “I would love to see how much longer he can keep this going.”

To Morpheus’ threadbare senses, his sister fell quiet, shifting on her feet as if to look sharply at something behind her. Nothing filled her silence, though, and he was not about to do it for her. He had said his piece.

“What?” Desire protested in the face of Death’s scolding glare and gestured first to the oblivious creature folded against the wall and then to their eldest sister. “All he desires is death, and that’s your domain.” They shrugged and crossed their arms once more. “As far as he’s concerned, I’m not here.”

They moved with the languid, mocking grace only they possessed, but even Desire, with all their skill at obfuscation and performance, did not lie well enough. For Death knew her younger siblings better than they knew themselves. And she easily spied the faintest disquiet that stiffened Desire’s flow and betrayed the truth of their state, their true reaction to the scene unfolding before them.

They were afraid. Afraid of how ugly he was willing to let this turn and of how long she would hold out against his protests.

They were right to be afraid.

Death put the twin out of her mind and returned her attention to their fallen brother.

Against the wall, Morpheus listened to the grind of grit between Death’s boots and the cobblestone as her weight shifted and sank. Her voice, when it came again, was lower to his level.

“You haven’t eaten,” she said, with all the patience of a mother talking down her tantrum-throwing toddler with deliberate, simply spoken logic. “You haven’t had even a single drop of water…so I know you know I spoke the truth before.”

At the mention of water, Morpheus’ throat once again spasmed and choked on phantom drink. He gritted his teeth further, redoubling the throb in his temples, and forced his desperate thirst to subside.

“You will not die,” his once beloved sister warned. “No matter what you do.”

He would take even rain at this point. But she could not know that. She could not win.

“Anyone else I would have taken by now.”

She sounded so sad. So battered, so tired…he could make that stop. All he had to do was—

No. No, he had to do nothing. She could make this stop as easily as he could—more easily.

She could not win.

He said nothing and tried to cling to the phantoms of The What Comes Next that still lingered like shades at the edge of his memory…wisps of smoke and nothing more. He did not think of food. Did not think of water. He had gone a hundred years without either as an Endless, feeling every ache of it in his bones then, too. He could do it again now.

Death, with her cadaver’s skull and lidless eyes, would blink first.

“Brother, you haven’t even slept,” Death pushed, and the first shade of a plea entered her entreaties. “He knows you haven’t gone to the Dreaming. He’s…he’s been waiting for you.”

Waiting for me, Morpheus wanted to sneer and instead ground his molars until the white-hot knife of pain shot through his jaw. Oh, sister.

I hate him more than I hate you.

“You’re torturing yourself!”

And there it was. The crack in her voice, the open beg for him to stop, just stop this, was as loud as the splintering of a frozen lake beneath the feet of a child—the snap of a climber’s rope and the millisecond of weightlessness before the free fall began.

The impact of a jouster’s lance on armor and the telltale smack of puncturing metal where there should have been a life-preserving ring.

The first fissure in her resolve.

Morpheus struggled to raise his head by trembling fractions, his hand following suit with dirtied, papery skin that could have gone up like tinder with the lightest spark. And with the deepest, most rattling breath he could manage, Morpheus pushed himself slightly more upright, his head raising until his forehead could brace against the sun-warmed bricks. His head turned on his aching, seizing neck, every muscle in his body trembling and cramping with starvation, and his eyes, both open now, locked onto his sister.

She was trying so hard to not stare at him in horror, he knew. The boundaries of even her quiet patience and compassion were reaching their limit along with his rapidly thinning form before her—with its darkening eye sockets and sinking cheeks and opening wounds and wax-like skin that somehow seemed both puffy and dried-out. His hair was stiffened with grime. His nails, once pale and pristine, were caked with dirt, and he knew he was starting to smell something spectacular.

“If…it bothers…you so,” he rasped between heavy breaths, painting his lips first pink and then red with each progressive word, “then…let…it…end.”

Death’s mercy stiffened.

“That’s how it is?” she asked after a long moment.

Morpheus gave his answer in his slow, marionette’s collapse back to his previous posture: shoulders hunched, head bowed, eyes closed, face averted.

And in doing so, he missed the moment Death’s face hardened into something reminiscent of their long-absent parents. He could not miss it in her voice, though, and if he had reflected on this moment, on what his sister offered him and how he was handling the situation, he would have realized his misstep. He would have re-evaluated his choices, his paths, and perhaps tried a different way. Perhaps, he would have ventured down that patchy elephant trail through the darkest part of the forest and seen what awaited him on the other side.

Perhaps, he would have felt even a flicker of guilt for driving his sister to such an extreme, for drawing out of her the echo of their parents’ lingering damage.

But Morpheus had never been one for honest insight.

“Fine.” Death sniffed sharply, dashing her hand to her nose, her eyes, and stood. She wiped her palms on her pants, adjusted her shirt, and passed her fingers over the chain of her necklace down to her ankh in fleeting comfort. “You want to play chicken with me? A staring match with Death?”

Her fidgeting stilled, and it left her standing as tall and firm as a Sovereign’s monument above her cowed subject. She looked down at him as such, and the sadness in her eyes was deep and pitying.

You brought this on yourself.

“Then, I’ll give it to you.”

“Wait,” Desire said, unheard at the alley mouth, “what?”

Death’s chin trembled and then firmed to an iron jaw. Her hands curled into fists, black nails sinking into her palms.

“You won’t see me again, Morpheus,” she promised. Her oath fell from her lips as bindingly as anything written in Destiny’s solemn book. “Not until you’ve learned the lesson.”

She turned from her once-brother in the alley and made it as far as Desire’s side before her certain step faltered. She dug her fingers into the ridge of her hips, hardly keeping herself from turning back to him. 

She looked to the sky. She blinked quickly and breathed in sharp, deep bursts as she struggled to hold her resolve.

There were birds overhead. Pigeons.

“Brother—” Her voice broke apart like the shards of a mirror beneath a sledgehammer, in a stuttering rainfall of glue and backing and glass. “You’re breaking my heart.”

Some of the precious moisture left in Morpheus’ body welled in his eyes. He did not let them fall, did not betray their presence in a flush across his cheeks or a deeper quake to his already unsteady breaths. He forced himself onward as he was: uncaring, indifferent.

There came the sound of wings and nothing more.

Alone again, Morpheus allowed himself to move. He sagged in a slightly different slump, canted his shoulders at just enough of an angle to grant him a line of sight from the corner of his eye to the alley’s mouth. Perhaps a part of him, that part that had believed that maybe his sister would change her mind, hoped even now that she would reappear.

To no one’s surprise, least of all his own, she did not.

Instead, the craving for food, for water, for sleep, came upon him once more with a touch more sharpness, and his eyes caught on the faintest shimmer of a deprivation-induced mirage at the alley’s entrance. Yellow eyes watched him from an uncharacteristically somber face, the bleached hair tinted at the roots with a shadow of their darker tones. Their lips, red and full and typically smiling with all the hunger of a cat with the canary ensnared in its claws, pressed into a strained, thin thing. They regarded him in much the same posture they had held before—leaned against the wall, their legs and arms crossed.

But that expression…Morpheus could not recall having ever seen that particular expression on Desire’s face. It was so foreign on them as to be unidentifiable. No matter how hard he tried or how familiar it seemed, it was….

“Why must you be so stubborn?” they sighed.

A wave of vertigo so great it nearly dragged him to the Dreaming itself swept over him. Spots of light and dark danced across his eyes, and for a fleeting moment, he swore a pulse of psychedelic color pirouetted between them, like a sullied paintbrush dunked into clean water.

He bit his tongue where it had already split, grounding himself in the subsequent flash of wet iron, and the butterfly wings of color settled once more into the shapes and tones of sanity. He answered his once-enemy, his once-sibling, from the silence of his mind. He knew they would hear it all the same. It was their function to know that which…that which humanity locked away, unspoken, in the confines of flesh and bone.

Because it is all that I have left.

He awaited no response, expected none. He curled back into the wall and submerged himself once more in that grating buzz of sensation, that numbing, static-laden bell jar of human existence where once he had been infinite. Everything fell away save that nothingness, including Desire.

And so, Morpheus lied there in an alley of Richmond-on-Thames, alone by his own hand once again.

He did not eat. He did not drink. He did not bother to even clean himself, allowing only the rain to wash over him when it came and not making any effort with it when it did beyond the will of nature and gravity. And while the agony of hunger and thirst, of starvation and desiccation, was nerve-deep in a way that it had not been as an Endless, it too eventually faded away into a dull, permeating background radiation if he ignored it hard enough. Sleep, he found, was not as easily refuted in a mortal body, but he had settled into a grudging rhythm with even that. For days at a time, upwards of a week, he would hold off the pull of his successor until he could no longer. And the sands that had once been his to command would pull him down, down, down—

Nightmares awaited him there, at rock bottom.

There in the Dreaming, in that place of power and refuge that had once moved at his command like a great symphony, he struggled and screamed and raged. He found no refuge from the pains of his Waking World, only a record of his worst mistakes skipping endlessly: his worst choices, his coldest and most calloused lows that he had once envisaged as his greatest highs. He wondered when he woke—with bitterness, with tear-less sobs, with a panic-stricken, racing heart—what he had possibly done to his successor in the short time they had known each other to warrant such treatment. He wondered how his Nightmares could hate him so, wondered if he had wounded them so grievously in life that they now leapt at such chances to turn their prowess against him. He had tried to pick out their handiwork even as he suffered at their hands, tried to distract himself from the contents of his dreams by attempting to peek behind the curtain, but so far, he had not been able to correctly call them out by name.

If he had, they had not betrayed themselves to him.

Meadows morphed into plains of agony, the long blades of grass hardening to razor sharp glass and metal that cut him to shreds no matter which way he moved. His falling blood blossomed into poppies, and his life blood coursed from his veins until a sea of wildflowers remained. When he could hold himself up no longer, the crimson turning now to petals before it had even left his veins, he collapsed into the ravenous land and impaled upon its ruthless fields until he woke screaming.

Libraries, once a quiet, reflective refuge, turned to consuming shadows as the shelves vanished within an encroaching dark that he knew he had to avoid at any cost. And as he fled amid their ranks, searching desperately for just one book, for one story that could show him the way out, he only fell deeper into a labyrinth he should have known as the back of his own hand. Every tome he opened turned to bone dust in his fingers, turned to rotted paper and buckram, and the spines transformed to vertebrae that dripped with blood and soaked his sleeves and stained his skin no matter how he scrubbed, and—

“…My Lord?”

Her voice…that blessed voice, he was saved, he was safe. His Librarian, ever loyal Lucienne would be able to guide him from here—

He turned to see her standing at the end of the aisle, just as the dreaded dark set upon her.

Her stalwart, kind yet stern countenance crackled and caught flame like the pages of a book, and she screamed, reaching for him with blackening and disintegrating hands as her eyes melted from her sockets and her glasses cracked with the self-immolating heat. Her agonized, shrieking howl turned to a drawn-out question, a demand raked over shattered stained glass and rubble, and voices three cackled amid the flames.

“WHY, MY LORD?”

He sat in a rocking chair before a softly crackling hearth, at peace, at rest. Until the flames jumped the stone, until the home caught fire, blazing into a 4-alarm inferno that consumed him and all around him. And all the while he was paralyzed within his chair, trapped at the heart of this hellfire with, at times, a babe clutched in his arms, swaddled in a blanket held tightly to his chest as it screamed and screamed and screamed. And the tighter he held, the louder it screamed, and the hotter the house burned, and his skin melted down to his bones, melted down to—

Sometimes, he dreamt of Fawney Rig.

Other times, he dreamt of Naxos.

He did not dwell on those dreams for too long. He did not dwell on any of them for too long. Even as he woke into the full-blown stupor of his youngest sister’s domain, he did not allow himself to consider the function of nightmares. He did not allow himself to consider that nightmares, at least under his tenure, had functioned much the same as Hell had under the Morningstar. The implication if he had would have been too great.

You received that which you thought you deserved.

There was no lesson to be learned. There could not be.

o\\__oOoOoOo__//o

The minutes stretched to hours, stretched to days, stretched to weeks. He could not recall now the first time that Delirium had appeared to him, only that she had arrived amid a torrenting school of glittering fish, a rainbow riptide that had set his skin crawling and his head spinning and had drawn a manic, helpless little giggle into his throat as his world tilted like a carnival ride in its wake. She had appeared to him cross-legged on the wall above him, her pale hair with its prism-colored streaks defying the laws of gravity and swimming about her head as if she were submerged in water with technicolor bubbles bursting from her lips as she spoke. Her eyes glittered neon blue and green each, and her head tilted to and fro like a curious dog as she considered him below her.

“You’re not my brother,” she announced after a time. “Brother-not-brother, sister-not-sister, but not sister-not-sister and brother-not-brother like Desire.” She rocked forward into a kneel that then sprawled her further onto all fours, reaching one hand down to poke at his filth-stiffened hair from her crouch upon the wall. “You’re brother-shaped but not brother insides.”

She felt like ants, like spiders skittering across his scalp, and he gritted his teeth to keep from scratching in a frenzy.

Not real. It is not real, it is only delirium—

She rocked back onto her heels, squinting in thought so deep it contorted the rest of her face along with it. The millions of little legs along his sunburnt skin, weaving between the roots of his matted hair, trickled away like the last dregs of sand from an hourglass.

“Like one of those bears or unicorns or fish or frogs, the mena…” She stopped. Blinked. Her fingers twisted and linked and released, trying to shape the letters and count the syllables she couldn’t recall. “Mena-whatever that word is, ménage a trois, menace—” She gave up in a huffing sigh and dropped into her cross-legged seat once more so that she could then double over at the hips, stretching her arms as far as they could along the brickwork toward Morpheus, her fingers flexing in kind before they dug into the mortar grooves. She turned her head, pillowing her temple along her netting-wrapped bicep at an angle that should have broken her neck. Those heterochromatic eyes, too bright, too saturated, watched him like needles. “The whatevers that they make at that place in the place made of other places where people go to buy and make and get things. Do you know that place? Where they make softer, squishier versions of bigger, stronger things?” Her arms crossed like her legs, and she settled her chin upon the X of her wrists in a pouting, scowling huff. “I wanted to make a little doggy for Barnabas, but they didn’t let us in. Stupid people.”

Her hair continued to drift and sway, drowned beneath invisible waves. Though he knew he had not moved, was pretty sure he had not moved—wait, have I moved—Morpheus felt himself float alongside her. Gravity could not touch him, could not tether. The cobblestones were firm beneath him, the wall as unyielding, and yet still he drifted.

He flexed his aching, spasming fingers into the pallet board and brick and tried to breathe through the vertigo.

There came a scooting above him, and his skin began to buzz, as if he were sitting too close to an old television screen, not that he personally knew what that was or had ever had the experience. Yet, he knew it all the same. He was standing close to the burning coils of something filled with power, and the barely contained chaos cloyed to him like dandelion fuzz.

When he dared glance to his once-sister from the corner of his eye, he found her looming mere inches from his face.

She was so strange, this close, with these mortal eyes. Porcelain-perfect skin, fragile as a doll’s and yet as sharp as diamond with just as many faceted surfaces refracting within itself until he was staring at a kaleidoscope: she was what he could only call fae-like and in the most terrible manner. She smiled with the same puckish quality, frowned with the same bafflement and nose-wrinkling disdain.

One spindly hand reached for him, fast and slow and smooth and jerky at the same time, impossible to track and yet impossible to not see coming. She picked at his hair, his skin, his clothes, pulled one arm from where he had wedged it between his body and the wall; and though he fought her all the while, he moved as putty within her hands, helpless to resist save for the droning whine that settled in his teeth at her proximity like a low, bass-y dog whistle only he could hear. The world was spinning. Spinning, spinning, spinning, and he was caught in the whirlwind. No, he was the vortex; no, he was the tear—

“Your outside isn’t as strong as my brother’s.” Delirium frowned as she ran her hands along the length of his arm, feeling every bone, each ligament and tendon that strained beneath paper-thin skin pockmarked with blisters and bruises. His muscles, once on par with that of an archer, a climber, a blade dancer, had wasted away, and he trembled in her grip. “Really not as strong as his. Think your stuffing might be like his, though.” She lowered his hand to peer into his eyes. “Is your stuffing like his was?” She frowned. “Or is it is?”

She released, and his arm snapped back to his side as if spring-loaded, searing and numbing in waves like the tides on a beach far from here. The vertigo began to ease, the world settling down to a tilt-a-whirl and not an outright tornado.

“It gets all messy with family,” she complained with another humphing sigh. She turned around to flop down on her back so that she hung upside down from the wall with her head settled beside his. “Messy, messy, messy like finger-painting—” She gasped and held her arms straight out to the sky, palms splayed. The sun sat between her outstretched hands, nestled in the cradle of her thumbs and index fingers. “Did you know parents used to put their kids on their shoulders even way, way, way back when to paint?” She wiggled her fingers, and little sparking pirouettes of light and color burst from them, as if drawing strumming lines of color and sound from the fabric of reality before her. “You can see their little hands up so, so, so high in those old, old, old caves from that way, way, way back time…too high up for them to reach so someone had to hold them up there.”

They stayed there like that for a while, Del on her back, squinting at the sun between her hands, and Morpheus below her, shivering and shuddering in the wake of her static. In time, she let her arms thud back to her sides. She chewed on her lip and looked a little less sure.

“I just saw him, y’know—my actual brother,” she began and rolled onto her stomach. Morpheus tried not to jump out of his skin as her touch brushed along his spine, sending a trickle of fingers spidering down his vertebrae like an old children’s rhyme that rose unbidden in his mind, not his to know and certainly never his to have experienced before. And yet there it was, in his memory, lilting in his sister’s voice like a siren from a watery cave.

Crack an egg on your head, let the yolk run down, let the yolk run down.

“But he doesn’t look like you,” Del mused. “He’s shiny and new.” Her nose crinkled, and she scrutinized her dirtied fingertips as she rubbed them together. “You smell, and you look dead. Is that mean to say?” She sighed again, this time tired and annoyed. “I don’t know what’s mean to say to family anymore, it’s so different for everyone now.”

She bent her knees, and her fishnet-clad feet kicked slowly at empty air, back and forth and back and forth.

“He doesn’t feel like you, either,” she said, contemplating Morpheus below her. “Your stuffing is all gooey and gushy and red, but he’s all stardust and ooh!” Her palms slammed down onto the wall, and she pushed herself up until her elbows locked like a mermaid on a rock or a yoga instructor in Cobra Pose. “Did you know space has a smell?” she blurted with a dazzling smile. “Do you know what space smells like? I went up there just to see for myself, it’s all burning hot metal and gasoline, summertime, burnt almonds on grills—” she dropped back to her elbows, her feet kicking faster now, her hands rising and contorting in storytelling accompaniment to her words. “It smells like an interstate. Going and going and going from one place to another and all these people right next to each other and all alone all at once until they crash into each other in hot metal and gasoline, and it’s all sunny under a big bright star, like a supernova. End and start and end and start, over and over and over—”

Her ramble stopped only to a deep, sucking inhale, and she stared at Morpheus with wide, moonish eyes. She reached down and thumped a hand against his shoulder blade. The stiffened joint crackled like old plastic, and once more the trickling fingers burst from the contact, running down his ribs to his hips and dripping to the filthy street. 

Stick a knife in your back, let the blood run down, let the blood run down.

“What are you?”

Morpheus said nothing for a long while, paralyzed beneath the running touch of those phantom hands, their cascading taps, their tingling contacts like a million little electrical shocks and a million little legs, a million little bites—

A million little butterfly wings.

“…Human,” he exhaled through cracked lips, the single word no louder than the breath it took to speak it.

Delirium worked herself back up into her cross-legged seat. Her head tilted.

“You don’t die like a human. You sure you’re human?” she needled. Morpheus nodded. Or at least he thought he nodded. He was still too overwhelmed with vertigo to be sure. “Human,” Del echoed above him, turning the word over in her mouth, shaping its vowels oh so carefully. “Human, human, hew-man. Hew means to cut,” she said, “to chop, chop, chop,” she said, driving the edge of one hand into the palm of the other, “to little bits—that’s really so much messier when you’re just a man. When you’re endless, you can unravel—” Her ankles turned beneath her, and she unfolded to stand tall, to rise on her toes with her feet still crossed. Her arms branched outward, and she fell into a sort of pirouetting spin that possessed all the coordination of a broken clockwork doll. “—and unravel and unravel, and you always—” her untangled feet landed firmly upon the wall, braced at a defiant shoulder’s width, “—unravel back into yourself. There’s nothing really to cut up.”

She stared down at her brother, swaying side to side. Colors and fish and butterflies and frogs lifted from the weathered layers of her red skirt with her movements, rising and falling like the pull of tides upon the drowned sands and grasses beneath their surfaces.

“But a man, a man cuts up in so many pretty colors,” she said and looked to her feet, twisting now at the hips as she swayed and moving her hands through the little friends that accompanied her as she did. “Like poppies and aaaall the fishies in the oceans.”

Her lights and sounds, her fish and butterflies and frogs, drifted down to him like bubbles waiting to pop, and their visages exploded into little bursts of confetti upon touching his emaciated form. Everywhere they lit upon him, the untethering furthered and worsened. He screwed his eyes shut and tried not to throw up blood and bile.

Spiders running up your arms, spiders running up your arms—

“Y’know, not-brother…” Delirium sank slowly into herself, into her masses, into her madness, and sat once more upon the wall. “I don’t think you’re doing the human thing very well.” Morpheus turned his head with painstaking slowness until he could fix one eye on his youngest sibling. She watched him, and in those eyes, both the same gleaming, brilliant blue, glowed something so far beyond the madness that it circled back around to sanity. “You should start over.”

Crisscross, applesauce—

She blinked. Her blue gaze halved to green, and the truth-sight went with it.

“Like an Etch-a-Sketch!” She lifted her hands as if holding a small board and began to shake it up and down. “Just shake-shake-shake-shake—”

—and now you have the chills.

A new sound encroached on Morpheus’ frayed senses, a loping pad of several light-footed steps overlapping each other in a patterned tattoo, and a gruff voice entered the alley a meter to his right and slightly behind him.

“There you are,” Barnabas growled, looking up at the girl sat upon the wall as he neared. She waved to him with a smile. “Every time you get away from me, I start to worry what you’re…”

His scold trailed away with his attention as his nose caught upon a truly offensive combination of smells, and he tracked it back to the mass huddled below his charge. But beneath the filth and the disease lurked something else. Something familiar, something….

Something from Naxos not that long ago but also an age past.

“Oh…oh, this isn’t good.” The dog approached slowly, his head low, his shoulders and haunches similarly stooped. His nose twitched, and a whine burred in his throat, low and warbling in the hollow of his chest. The man did not acknowledge him. “That you in there, Morpheus?”

Delirium tossed her arms with a frustrated sigh.

“I’m trying to figure that out, Barnabas!”

The dog paused and raised his unimpressed eyes to her without adjusting his head. “How’s that working out for you?”

Delirium humphed and drew her knees up to her chest, locking her arms about them as she watched what came next from atop her kneecaps. Barnabas resumed his approach with the same caution as before, until he was near enough to close the last of the distance between himself and Morpheus. He stretched forward but kept his paws planted firm, every inch of him ready to leap back if the man reacted poorly even as he kept his large form as relaxed and un-menacing as possible.

A damp nose surrounded by feather soft white and black fur butted up against Morpheus, tucking beneath his arm to nudge at his head where it drooped upon his neck.

“Hey,” a voice nudged. Its breath was soothingly warm, like its body, and another whine rippled through it, a touch higher than before. Its tail wagged, low and slow, and its ears pressed flat to its skull as, having met no resistance at first, the mutt pressed a little further and knocked its head against the man’s in a reassuring nuzzle. “You want to try to get some food or drink in you?”

That proximity was the only reason Barnabas felt Morpheus’ minuscule shake of the head.

No.

“Oh. I see.” The dog pulled back, his ears now cocked forward, his stance held tall, and he regarded his new charge with the same beleaguerment he viewed Delirium. “So, this is deliberate.”

Morpheus missed the warmth and softness in his arms. He twitched a little further into the wall and hoped he hid his spike of yearning in the shift.

“Do you want this to be Morpheus?” Barnabas asked.

Delirium’s mouth curved in a ponderous frown and, like a child playing leapfrog, vaulted from the wall to the floor.

“Yeah?” She stood. “I think so. I…” She began to sway back and forth again as she watched her brother-not-brother like he was a fading Tinkerbell and all she had to do to bring him back to her was clap her hands and say I believe! I believe! as loud as she possibly could. Her hands clasped at the small of her back with tangled fingers, the very picture of a little girl afraid of asking too much. “I miss him.”

Barnabas nodded, as far as a dog could nod.

“Ok,” he said and padded off.

After a few minutes filled with nonsensical hums and mutterings and the faintly rattling breaths of the living corpse slumped against the wall, there came a distant clatter followed swiftly by scolding shouts. Nearly a minute later, the loping footsteps returned, and Barnabas slowed to first a prance and then a walk as he rounded the corner, a slightly mangled sandwich and water bottle held gently within his jaws.

He set them at Morpheus’ side, nudged right up against his scabbed and sunburnt feet, and sat back to wait.

“You know what they call us dogs?” he asked when the man continued to show no intent of moving.

There came the slightest shift in Morpheus’ sunken, heavy-lidded eyes that told Barnabas he had made some kind of effort to look in his general direction. But in his sullen silence also came his reply.

No.

“Man’s best friend,” Barnabas said in answer to himself. He walked out his front legs until his belly pressed to the ground, and he pillowed his jaw upon his paws in wait. “I’m about to get really annoying.”

Morpheus’ eyes shifted forward once more, into the filthy, cobwebbed dark of the pallet boards and wall.

Delightful.