#and of course all my other content too
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sad: falling out of a hyperfixation
tragic: watching your beloved friends and mutuals fall out of the hyperfixation while you're still in it
#oughhhhhhh#this is about the dca fandom but also about every other strong fixation ive had over the years lol#i know it's normal and inevitable esp for less popular works or minor characters with little canon content#and there's nothing wrong with smaller communities of course those rock#but there’s just something special about getting into something at the same time as a lot of other people all at once#and existing in this chaotic fandom space that's just bursting with creativity and passion#i've been in fandom spaces for as long as some of you have been alive and i've only come across that sort of unbridled joy like#a handful of times at best#it's just a heartbreaking feeling to see real lightning in a jar fandoms like that wither away as people drift away#(understandably so!)#anyway don't mind me i'm just having thoughts#musing about fandoms past as well#that i too eventually moved on from but remember fondly even if im not active in anymore#also my music just aint hitting right so im just sitting in silence which makes me more Contemplative(tm)
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2024 Abu Dhabi GP
#max verstappen#autumn posts#and of course Alain Prost!!#this moment is very much me thirsting tho 😵💫#his chesttt his hips his hair looking so BLONDE in the sun!!!!#🫠💫✨#sorry all the spam this morning!!#also I usually don't give too much thought to follower counts on tumblr dot com#folks should make the space they like!! follow and unfollow freely#but I did loose a couple folks and I wonder if it was all the asks ahhh#like definitely if someone is looking for f1 content then random factoids about this Texas gal are Not interesting hehe#but I'm trying to open up a bit more!#I even had some thoughts on Daniel I deleted ahh still trying to figure out where to blog about heavier stuff but probs not on main#this blog is more to escape the real world and bite Max's lovehandles in my mind#with maybe the occational ask game!!#but I'll probs keep my writing on the other blog and my heavier feelings in the old diary...idk figuring it out but its not that serious too#just rambling before work!!#but anyways!! 2025 year of being more open#if you are reading this then hello 😶🌫️ btw ricciardo133 is my fanfic writing space#I'll be waxing poetic about my Max and Daniel feelings there#and yearning over this man's hips and tummy and thighs my goshhhhh#😵💫❤️✨#anyways!!!#hope its an excellent time of day wherever you may be 🌇🏙️🌃#mentally I'll be here 😵💫😵💫😵💫
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pete taking pictures of patrick. patrick taking videos of pete. joe taking pictures of all of them . it is all simply too much for me i cant handle fob showing how much they love each other like this
#as im peterick brained that stuff is making me the most insane of course but the joe stuff too is so. ouhhvhh my god#all the content we’ve been getting recently has been stuff theyve taken of each other .#txt
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I kinda hopped into the dc fandom by reading fics (I know I know lmao)
But as I've read more comics and looked into different characterization and analysis I now have a more developed idea as to how I view a lot of the characters and have preferences to how their written. I'm def the type to click out a fic if I find myself thinking 'he would not fucking say that'
Anyway this is just to say it's very funny to me when I go thru some of the fics I bookmarked at the begining of my interest and find myself going Uh Oh! I don't think I can read this anymore!
#dc#dc comics#batverse#batfam#i do feel like i see too much beef and negativity abiut this kinda thing#i prefer to be a#i curate my own internet space#type of guy#but also i get it when your looking for fan content and so much of it is like 😭#an interpretation you hate#anyway this is probs obvious but mostly about the robins#like tim is probs one of my fave robins#but people go too hard on the whump for my personal taste#esp when it feels a bit of a disservice to the other characters#give me nuance i love nuance!#of course- fanfic is free and it is also free to not read it so to be clear o dont actually give a shit what people write#be free#go write that ooc chat fic life is short do whats fun#thinkin these thoughts at a party where i only know my dad and my dads friend LOL#wait i have more thoughts- ALSO#it really is funny to me#to be like. wow. i loved this fic#i thought it was SO GOOD#And to be holding that thought and perspective in my head#while also being like. ooph.#picking apart all the problems i have with it now#and like how. maybe id still like it if i just pretend they're ocs?#i can sometimes do that- but not always because i often go to fic for a specific dynamic#and i get really frustrated when i gotta be like. who the fuck is this guy its not the one with their name in the tags#i can sometimes tho
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this isn't an ask or a request, but I hope you could still post it, because since I found this account the wave of love for this fandom crushed me yet again
not to disclose who I am too much, but here's a fact: I was dealing with pre schoolers as a part of my education(or, well, practice). around the same time I discovered the wonderful world of hermitcraft age regress fics. I myself don't regress, but I find those works insanely comforting. anyways I mentioned my education because, while in fics the looking after might be Way to soft and all-allowing (that YES can be very bad even short term), most of the works show it really well. and not just comforting, but as if the authors know Very Well they are portraying not a parent figure per say, but a "cool uncle that looks after you" type character and I LOVE IT. maybe this says smth about my childhood, maybe it's the overwhelming feeling of love coming from a friendship, but still. kudos to everyone who writes age re in this fandom, I love you.
I still haven't explored the topic of age regression as a study (meaning: I haven't really looked up the real world instances), but I have a feeling that learning about this phenomena in psychology feelings-first from a fictional work was a good idea.
Your ask has actually reminded me why I love this blog. I've been a bit out of touch with the fandom lately, but the sense of community that comes from gathering around something so niche is really nice and I love hearing about it.
I'm glad this type of content can be comforting and enjoyable even if you don't regress!
Also, when I originally had the idea to start this blog, there was very little agere-related content in this fandom that didn't emphasize a parental, set-in-stone caregiver as a key feature. I'm happy to see so much more variety in how people portray it in relation to friends and partners.
#Anonymous#also i appreciate that theres less emphasis on a carer as someone who has all the same authority as an actual parent#im sure theres still works like that (i havent actually been on ao3 in ages)#but i always found it hard to enjoy that type of content because it was an automatic assumed thing in most instances#that the carer would be a parent with full authority over the regressed person#without much (or any) discussion.#for me at least being treated like that while in that state would not be good for me#so having that be presented as the default made it difficult to read.#this is also why a lot of my posts center around friends just being patient and comforting and hanging out/playing instead of having a#distinct carer#and the ones that do feature a carer rarely have a parental vibe.#when i write about interactions between a regressed character and an adult-mode character i usually try to think of like#what type of boundaries they wouldve set with each other. and how that relates to the regressed characters individual feelings#since some people find it helpful to have someone act like a babysitter would. but others just prefer for their friends to hang out normall#of course fanfiction doesnt always need to be real world accurate and can just be someones 'man i wish someone would take care of e' fantas#(a lot of my unpublished stuff lately is just like... characters being far too accommodating of the pov character's problems lol)#but i like to include variety#wow i rambled a lot more than i meant to#not a headcanon#oli says things
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obsessed w the tags on ur last reblog
Omgg, thank you haha, it was a quality post so I just had to appreciate it in full force 😂❤️
Can‘t believe someone would actually enjoy my yapping :,D
#guys help is it time for a rebranding?? am I just gonna post about f1 now??#I still can’t believe this has all started because bestie and I were watching Ted Lasso (because I’ve been obsessed with that show for a#while now too) and I paused the episode to talk about how I really like the way Jamie interacts with kids (I’m sorry people being good with#and nice to kids is one of my weaknesses I work with kids now and have been invested in treating kids well forever)#so me saying that apparently reminded her of max and she showed me a video of him with p and yeah it was very effective in making me like#him and then we left the episode on pause and she told me a lot about f1 and max specifically cause I was interested now lmao (funny thing#is that she also got roped into it by our other friends I swear it’s speeding lmao#she also compared him to Jamie from Ted lasso (if you know you know) and showed me some heart wrenching Taylor swift edits (i haven’t#emotionally recovered yet) and yeah that’s how I started consuming way too much f1 content on YouTube and got into this whole mess lmao#oh yeah our friends also made me and another friend make a Tier list for all the drivers based on vibes alone (cause I only knew a bit about#max at that time and the other one knew nothing really) which was very funny too#especially looking back at it (we did some of them so dirty lmao 😂)#I’ve also come to the conclusion that tumblr is still one of the least annoying platforms to engage with other people (still)#YouTube is full of hate comments about drivers and stuff it’s so annoying actually#not to mention Twitter but I don’t go there and probably never will 😂#I personally don’t enjoy fics and scenarios and shipping of real people cause it makes me a bit uncomfy (not judging people who do#you do you as long as it doesn’t negatively affect anyone#but yeah I’d much rather just scroll by those here than have to look away from all the mindless hate and which driver is better discussions#everywhere else like I’m not one to engage with stuff like that but it does upset me to some#degree so yeah tumblr making memes and being rather positive about their drivers (most of what I’ve seen here of course there are gonna be#annoying people everywhere) is much more tolerable and a lot more enjoyable for me#whoops this post got away from me again oh dear#I’ve had the idea for a meme stuck in my head for days now: Max verstappen but make it if you don’t love me at my *swearing on team radio#giving spicy replies and attitude to the media maxplaining and complaining going for risky overtakes* you don’t deserve me at my *precious#interactions with p talking about his cats being a goofball with other drivers and especially danny defending other drivers driving#beautifully in the rain* it’s a package deal you can’t just pick and choose and personally I don’t even get why people complain about some#of the other stuff I appreciate someone who’s passionate and honest and genuinely kind where it matters 🤷🏻♀️#I think I’ve seen someone else say that but the more people complain about and criticize max the more I feel the need to defend him#god forbid women have hobbies for real (can’t believe I’ve yapped so much I can’t put more tags 💀)#also shoutout to Oscar Piastri and Danny Ric (I was so happy Oscar won even tho McLaren where being very silly in a not so funny way)
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#interview with the vampire#i just found and watched a video on youtube that is a lestat hate and rant about his fans and it was so SO cathartic#i dont even agree with everything said and was naturally at first skeptic of a youtuber's opinion#but finally FINALLY there is a louder voice of someone who can see things about this show from another point of view#even if it's a pov that's more strict than the one i use to analyze media myself#i thought i was going crazy when seeing the fan opinions surrounding this show. mostly out there but sometimes here too#like yeah with how popular loustat is i knew there would be plenty of bias for the angle that flatters it#but the things ive seen lestat & loustat fans say.... the longing for eye bleach was real#but finally someone is there to underline that hey. that very present very intentional racial and power dynamics are in fact very real.#do in fact influence the characters accordingly. and does not come out of thin air or just 'the circumstances'#it's valid to explore the other side of the coin in louis' character of course. but it doesnt mean that it's not there#mind you. all of that shit louis described? is while insisting he was not 'an abused person'#and its so satisfying to see how someone can pass all the bullshit and have the serenity of heart to recognize that#regardless of everything else. there is a reason why louis felt like lestat was a predator and he was being preyed on#that is because he largely was. lestat *was* a vampire on the hunt. an emotional vampire to boost along with the more literal sense#he might disagree to be doing that on a conscious level and he might have clear reasons to have the instincts he does. he still did that#thank you for also calling bullshit on the reunion scene dialogue and parts of the trial in how it was trying to frame certain things#its the main reason why s2 didnt fully work for me. like jesus christ.#that man literally was part of a ploy to murder their daughter. BE SERIOUS. and im supposed to be mad about armand's involvement??#i also felt so seen when he talked about how dickmatized penis delirious to the point of frustration louis is#there is so much to be grateful for. in highlighting the weight of lestat's involvement vs armand's#in talking about louis' family's side of things. expressing how people for some reason love to call armand a mastermind lying manipulator#when the first culprit of that is the blonde bitch??#honestly the irritation i feel towards many of the fans of this show and the major opinions was such#that i was feeling bad just be seeing iwtv content around and i dont wanna feel like that. i like the show so much.#this was soul clearing in a way. even if. again. i dont fully agree with everything#love how its so clear how so many people try to invoke the books when trying to dissuade him from thinking ill of lestat#because thats exactly my experience too LMAO. talk about a weak limpdick argument#and people who try to invoke unreliable narrator are not much better#and the whole story is made up from the writer's head and nothing matters! see i can do this too
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All I want for Christmas is to see a better year.
#silversirenpersonal#where i dont fail at everything i set out to do in the year#where I feel like a priority for people i prioritize and care about#where I feel as seen and heard as I try to be for everyone else#where most of my friends and family dont forget my birthday#where my friendliness isnt misconstrued as anything else and misplaced#where people don't leap to the worst conclusions and just give me a scrap of good faith#where I don't feel like some entity to appease rather than a person who just wants to feel welcomed#I'm very tired and this is a lot to ask for#it's just very difficult seeing the outpouring of love and support and reassurances others get#and getting barely more than crickets personally#and it just feeds into this pervasive sense that Ive overstayed my welcome and people are sick of me#maybe I should just be content with seeing the new year at all#because event that feels like a lot to ask for too#of course the worst depressive spiral of the year would happen right here at the finish line
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"The entire world despises my existence. Always has."
#‡ ic#lamenting of course to a rat or two#wont someone do something about the sad trash in the sewer#(dont its dangerous)#ive been inactive for a hot minute but im slowly chugging along agaaain if i keep it up i can get other blog content going too#i love how all my mutuals are so kind and patient with me and my bouts of disappearing thank youu
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thinking pondering to me john torres is like. what if u met a woman. with confidence and dignity and a strong moral backbone. you meet and she makes a distinct impression with her honesty and her frankness and she seems like she's always sure of what she wants and what she needs and she's so different from anyone else you know and thats exciting and she's exciting and she likes you specifically you. and you don't think much of you but it feels good to be liked by someone like that. you love her of course. you marry her. of course!
#diary#miral of course miral this post as all other posts on my blog is about miral. head in my hands#john torres and his projected insecurities and shitty behavior you will always be infamous.#im so deeply rooted in my headcanons for them i have au's . girl the universe isnt even that well established ?#call me b'elanna torres the way i'm turning miral and john over in my head to figure out what the heck happened#in my head john and miral are like. john voice she's never stuttered in her life she always knows what to do she's very serious strong head#on her shoulders. my kind of woman.#meanwhile miral is like. act first pray on it later was that a mistake? well what is a mistake really this is my path now#and i'll have to see how to handle what has been done. seeing as now it can't be changed shrugs. the honorable thing to do.#i also think they see a lot of their flaws as like-#consequences of their cultures and not like personal flaws which can sometimes be true but also sometimes they are very much flaws in the#person.#miral is a little too sure of herself bordering on arrogance and likes control. john is like ahh klingons and their surefootedness :)#<- a little correct but also very wrong.#john is very like. at his worst a cold shoulder bad at personal confrontation kind of a pushover quick to resent but usually just seems#serious and occasionally quiet . normally social tho! so miral is like. a consequence of his upbringing that can't be changed. i will#take him as he is.#which is a nice sentiment and would normally be applied well unless you are these two specifically.#what happens when its 10 or even just five years later and you're getting tired of the cowardice? what happens when its five years later and#you can't go a day without arguing? what happens then.#did you confuse her arrogance for poise for assertiveness? did you confuse her recklessness with courage? whos wrong her or you?#miral voice is he a fool does he not care? he's content to just stand by? cower?#i think from the klingon pov a man who isn't willing to fight for you and your relationship must be devastatinggggg#not literally of course here but also literally. lol#but yeah what does it do to you when the person you love won't even argue with you anymore just totally pulls away? leaves. head in my hands#who do you think fell first. idk but i know who fell harder! :) <- tears in my eyes#i really like pathways where they made miral like a chatty woman and had her offer to host parties for b'elanna and her friends it was so#sweet i should read it again.#i like her to be a little crazy though <3 :)
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sometimes your favorite song is by the idol group you see every time you go to tokyo but they haven't released it to streaming and they're quite obscure (not to mention taping performances is extremely NG in jpop idol culture) so the only time you have a chance of hearing it is when you go watch them perform and it's like not even guaranteed that it'll be on the setlist every time and then you find out it's actually by a disbanded sister group of theirs and they also didn't release it to streaming but they did put it on youtube in a 20 minute long video that features their entire first mini-album except for some reason it's the absolute worst quality vocals you've ever heard on a professional recording as in not the mic quality but the actual singing quality as in it sounds like a group of friends doing karaoke not even professional singers just some friends with no retakes no autotune touchups not even re-recording the lines that are off rhythm but it still means you kinda get to hear the song in your apartment. but is it even really the same song as the one you hear when your favorite member gets the solo in the chorus and walks from the back of the stage out towards the audience between the rest of the members as if parting the sea. is it
#really unrelatable content i'm posting tonight#it's not like actually my favorite song but i'm always like swept off my feet when they perform it#god damn am i homosexual#i have got to get to tokyo. i did say i would be back within september . aaaaaaaa#it was like. march or april? that they just randomly started performing it a lot#and it's funny remembering that my oshi is like. actually a very talented idol and not just someone i stan as a joke#sometimes i go in like aaa haha i uh i'm back! me the foreigner! i guess i'm participating in idol culture#bc i do always do the fanmeet part at the end too where i get to talk to her for like. probably 90 seconds? idk i lose track#and even though i'm a random white girl we've been at this long enough that she talks to me exactly like any other idol fan#and does all the 'you were't looking at any of the other girls were you?' and the 'i'm happy you're back i wish you'd come every day!! :)'#very interesting thing to experience firsthand#but also makes me forget that the main reason i stan so hard is because. she's just a really good idol#like sometimes i get to the venue kinda nervous to be there and then as the live goes on i'm like. ah. of course. i'm here not bc of the#idol-fan relationship validation but because i get to watch this lady perform again and she's so so good#especially that song. i really wish they'd release their own version#i really do love her voice#personal
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yeah i'm one spoon away from setting the ends of my hair on fire if i'm kindling for a little while at least i'll feel of use... promise me that you'll start where i end and i promise to give you everything that i am and it goes on, and on, and on... we'll go on and on and on in the end all i hope for is to be a bit of warmth for you when there's not a lot of warmth left to go around.
#(aka one of thor's many many many musical anthems that resides in my head)#(like gosh this song is PERFECT for the kind of thought processes that thor goes through on the daily?)#(the constant stress / the feeling you're only of use when you're burning alive)#(being happy and contented with that in a twisted kind of way because you may be burning but your kindling-)#(-will keep others warm like haha wow)#(really is the embodiment imo of thor's particular brand of self-sacrifice)#(steve does it for justice and standing up for the little guy which is honorable in and of itself)#(it fascinates me CONSTANTLY that thor legitimately does a similar thing...out of nothing and for nothing but the sake of love)#(whether it's love for his family / his homeland / for earth / for the people who live all across the universe)#(he just loves??? ALL of it. and of course there are some limits and he's not going to bumble over himself-)#(- to love another. but the idea of quasi-unconditional love that stems from this guy in his own way)#(i've always loved that about him and his values as a superhero the most)#(honestly i've loved steve's version of it too but having deep-dived into both men the past couple months)#(thor comes out on top every time)#( music . ) — the spirit of thunder is to be heard .#( ooc . ) — stories that leap from the page .
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#btw guys! while i'll of course let a friend know if i think skintone in a gifset is too pale/pink/yellow/etc esp if asked +#it literally isn't my job to police whitewashing on tumblr dot com lol#like i simply am not going to spend my time trying to correct people i don't know and for all i know don't care.#onus should be on the creator to actively check if unsure and not on me to have to go to their inbox to hold their hands about it !!!#i think it creates a weird hierarchy on here when ccs go around trying to correct other people who don't seem to want to change lol#i literally think the solution is just. to not engage. i don't engage with/reblog content that i don't feel comfortable putting on my blog.#i think it's really that simple lol. i'm too old and tired to go around on the internet telling people they're doing things wrong.#(also. ofc there are exceptions. just like. u know. generally.)#ok. kith. sorry this got so long lol. love u guys <333
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this man fucking eats like there’s no one else in the fucking house
#i’m pissed#he just ate 4 cinnamon buns out of 6#and he had 2 yesterday too#so he ate half a dozen#he gets 6 and my mom and i get 2????? fuck all the way off#like at least ASK bro#if you buy your own food eat that to ur hearts content but the rest of the food we’re sharing here#he thinks i’m silly for hiding and labeling my food but he would eat it if i didn’t 🤬#like when my dad died i had a plage set aside for me and he was like haha she gets mad when i eat her food#of course i fucking do#ok so my mom said she left 2 from the other bag so he actually ate 7 or 8
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ramble about anxieties with psy that got longer than i inteded so its going under the break
my sibling pointed out that we should be careful with melody's character at the risk of falling into stereotypes of black and trans women being seen as annoying/loud/too much but like she is just such a Real Person to me that if we toned her down to try and avoid those stereotypes it would feel Wrong to me? like to me she is not a stereotype she is just a person who is having fun. and the thing is everyone adores her for it, no one except psy thinks she is annoying or Too Much, they love her. but like that is such a major concern to me that i was sure we were gonna get hate mail the second her chapter dropped (so so thankful that everyone seems to love her as much as we do and that that did not happen lol) and now that someone actually pointed it out (my fucking SIBLING no less) i am so anxious about it all over again when i had previously gotten over it and decided 'no, she's not a stereotype, she's a human with many multitudes!'
toning her down and making her "nicer" or whatever seems like. worse. it's just this loop of like. okay but we wrote her that way and we didnt have to. but shes such a real person in our heads. but shes NOT a real person shes a fictional character and we can write her however we want. idk i dont think it is an issue like i think she is good. i think you just gotta see that shes a very complex individual, as are all of the characters in psy. it would be even worse to make her Perfect and Nice and Never Does Anything Wrong to avoid making a black trans woman look bad on screen. like shes not perfect despite everyone she knows seeing her that way. and her seeing herself that way as a coping tool i have said too much
#tho sometimes i feel like my sibling is a little bit too... hmm how do i say this#well one time when we were younger we watched coraline together#and theres a line where wybie calls coraline 'crazy' and also a line where coraline calls the other mother an 'evil witch'#and my sibling got offended by both of these lines#and i was like ok im 10 and im trying to show u my favorite movie im sorry that the child in the movie called his child friend 'crazy'#im sorry that the child in the movie called the evil woman trying to fuckin. steal her away from her world or whatever an 'evil witch'#like i am sorry u r so offended on behalf of all the real life witches you know. but this is childrens fiction#anyways#completely unrelated in terms of content#but do u know what im trying to say#and i mean that was a long time ago#theyre just trying to look out for me.. i was like 'no i know i think you should wait and see where its going'#and they said 'ok i trust you and i will defend u against anyone who comes for u' sdsklfsjdf SO LIKE ITS FINE#but it still got me thinking about it all over again. siiiiiigh#i mean other than that they said they loved it and had lots of very kind things to say about it.#but of course the one criticism is whats gnawing at me. even tho they walked it back like that. lmao#personal
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Hihi just wanna say real quick that you are very cool :00 I adore all the little comments you put in the tags on my posts they’re so fun to read /gen and it’s really awesome to find another Kross enjoyer (alsoalso your art is beautiful too)
anyway I just wanted to say that…
-A person who was too nervous to send this out of anon lmao
UAZGHJHFAGJ AAAA THANK YOUUU :') <3333
man why are you all so shyyyy when i'm just. i'm just a lil girl i'm a small widdle artist who goes insane over anything that remotely involves art/writings on the most niche fandoms like :'D i'm really not that cool i promise HHH xD
and man i might not know exactly who you are (although i can probably guess >;)c) but it makes me extremely happy that you like my tags!! i know how good it feels to get some nice comments on your works so for all the people who looked at it and didn't reblog i'll give you as many tags that i can possibly come up with!!! >:Dc <33333
#ask#no no i mean i get it. i know some artists i wouldn't even send an ask to because they're WAY too composed; brief and cool and it's just!!#scary to not receive the same amount of enthusiasm you send because you start overthinking your interactions and all-#so i get it!! but like...me? mE???#is it the art thing? do you guys look at my art and think i'm as cool as the art?? if so then GHFTJFHKJLJ thANK YOU#but also?? i wish i was too bro HHH i am literally incapable of sounding mysterious and interesting xD i tricked you guys into being shy#when I'M the shy one stop whatever you're thinking cause I'M the shyest one out of us two!!! how DARE you think i'm good with words#i'm NOT i mumble and fumble with my thoughts and it somehow sounds good but like!! other than compliments i'm basic hhhh xD#and another kross enjoyer?? you think i DON'T feel like i found a jackpot when i find new content for them??#like of COURSE i'd love your stuff and i'll make sure you know it very well hhhh xD but really i do appreciate it!#haven't interacted with a bunch of new ppl in a WHILE so i guess i just feel really giddy and happy lately :')#and ofc don't feel like you have to go off anon but don't worry about sending me asks without being anonymous either >:Dc#thank you thank you thank you<3333
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