#john is very like. at his worst a cold shoulder bad at personal confrontation kind of a pushover quick to resent but usually just seems
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thinking pondering to me john torres is like. what if u met a woman. with confidence and dignity and a strong moral backbone. you meet and she makes a distinct impression with her honesty and her frankness and she seems like she's always sure of what she wants and what she needs and she's so different from anyone else you know and thats exciting and she's exciting and she likes you specifically you. and you don't think much of you but it feels good to be liked by someone like that. you love her of course. you marry her. of course!
#diary#miral of course miral this post as all other posts on my blog is about miral. head in my hands#john torres and his projected insecurities and shitty behavior you will always be infamous.#im so deeply rooted in my headcanons for them i have au's . girl the universe isnt even that well established ?#call me b'elanna torres the way i'm turning miral and john over in my head to figure out what the heck happened#in my head john and miral are like. john voice she's never stuttered in her life she always knows what to do she's very serious strong head#on her shoulders. my kind of woman.#meanwhile miral is like. act first pray on it later was that a mistake? well what is a mistake really this is my path now#and i'll have to see how to handle what has been done. seeing as now it can't be changed shrugs. the honorable thing to do.#i also think they see a lot of their flaws as like-#consequences of their cultures and not like personal flaws which can sometimes be true but also sometimes they are very much flaws in the#person.#miral is a little too sure of herself bordering on arrogance and likes control. john is like ahh klingons and their surefootedness :)#<- a little correct but also very wrong.#john is very like. at his worst a cold shoulder bad at personal confrontation kind of a pushover quick to resent but usually just seems#serious and occasionally quiet . normally social tho! so miral is like. a consequence of his upbringing that can't be changed. i will#take him as he is.#which is a nice sentiment and would normally be applied well unless you are these two specifically.#what happens when its 10 or even just five years later and you're getting tired of the cowardice? what happens when its five years later and#you can't go a day without arguing? what happens then.#did you confuse her arrogance for poise for assertiveness? did you confuse her recklessness with courage? whos wrong her or you?#miral voice is he a fool does he not care? he's content to just stand by? cower?#i think from the klingon pov a man who isn't willing to fight for you and your relationship must be devastatinggggg#not literally of course here but also literally. lol#but yeah what does it do to you when the person you love won't even argue with you anymore just totally pulls away? leaves. head in my hands#who do you think fell first. idk but i know who fell harder! :) <- tears in my eyes#i really like pathways where they made miral like a chatty woman and had her offer to host parties for b'elanna and her friends it was so#sweet i should read it again.#i like her to be a little crazy though <3 :)
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Second part of Mikey Palin/Monty Python Story...
The next few days were quite relaxing for Penny as she wasnât needed for any scenes.
It was sort of nice to get a break from The Pythons. Â She didnât want to disturb them too much with her presence anyway!
She decided to fully embrace the Scottish history and visit all the castles and museums that were in reasonable driving distance from where she was staying. Luckily she had brought her camera with her so took plenty of pictures.
The Scottish countryside really was beautiful. So much greenery. So peaceful. She had made a picnic basket for herself and laid a blanket on the grass. She lay on the blanket for a while contemplating the last day or so of being here.
She lost track of the time after a while until she heard a voice coming from above.
âDidnât expect to see you hereâŚâ
She got up suddenly.
âOh hi John, finished filming?â
âYes just finished, thank god. We missed your presence on set today actually, well I did.â
Penny was of course flattered but she really wasnât interested in John. She hoped he realised that.
âIâm flattered. To be honest Iâve been enjoying the peace and quiet. The countryside has that kind of effect on you, doesnât it?â
âOoh no I find the countryside dreadfully boring. Itâs Mike and Terry who are into that kinda stuff.â
Another reason to like Michael. He loved nature and appreciated the beauty of it.
âSo you, uh, ready to head back?â said John.
âYeah sure.â Penny said with a smile.
She was looking forward to seeing Michael, she couldnât wait to hear about his day.
Michael saw Penelope coming towards him accompanied by John. A feeling of jealousy came over him.
Oh come on Mike, she wouldnât be interested in John heâs married for a start! But John is so bloody charming. He has a way with women. They all fall at his feet. Why donât I have that sort of luck?
âLook who I bumped into on my travels!â
âAlright Penny, fancy seeing you here!â said Eric.
âHello. Iâm afraid John interrupted my peace and quiet for the day!â Penny said with a wink.
âOh John! Couldnât you give the girl a bit of peace for one day?â said Michael.
Penny loved it when Michael defended her. It was quite attractive!
âI didnât exactly seek her out Mike. How was I to know she was going to be there?â said John.
âAlright, alright letâs not start arguing. Weâve had a really good day of filming, letâs not spoil it with pointless bickering.â Said Terry J.
It was quite ironic that in this case Jonesy was trying to be the mediator when heâd locked horns with John on more than one occasion!
âWell I donât know about you guys but Iâm ready for some food, fancy joining me Penny?â said John.
Penny noticed Michael shot John a dirty look. Could it be that Michael was jealous?
âUhâŚâ
All the Pythons turned to look at her. Now she really felt under pressure! They knew that refusing John would be a big mistake on her part! However Penny didnât want him to get the wrong impression.
âBetter say yes Penny otherwise youâll never hear the last of it! The day you refused THE John Cleese!â said Eric with a laugh.
âOh shut up Idle. So, Penny, made a decision yet?â
âUh, well, I donât want to upset you by saying no as itâs very kind of you to ask and everythingâŚâ
âJesus Christ guys am I that bad to hang around with?â
The Pythons all looked at each other. Who was going to be the one to have the balls to tell John how intolerable he could be to hang around with sometimes?
âWell John sometimes you can be a bit, well, difficult to be around. Especially if youâre going through your questioning phaseâŚâ said Michael.
Penny smiled. It was rare Michael was the confrontational type as he had been described by his fellow colleagues as a bit of a pushover. There was a reason why he had a reputation of being the nicest man. A title Michael really hated but Penny knew full well it was true.
Penny reckoned that Michael knew he could get away with saying it because John liked him so much. After all it was Johnâs desire to work with Michael that got Monty Python together in the first placeâŚ
âAlright, Penny I wonât force you to have food with me it is entirely your decision.â
âOkay well as much as I would like to take up the offer, I would like to continue with my original plan of having my own space which includes eating on my own.â
âWell, alright. See you tomorrow at filming then Penny?â
âYeah see you later.â
She said her goodbyes to the guys and headed off. Luckily she knew her surroundings and got back to the hotel okay. She did want a quick shower as it was actually reasonable weather today but she knew as soon as The Pythons got back, hot water would be none-existent.
Luckily a cold shower could be the ideal thing right now.
She was right. The cool water was refreshing and she was looking forward to grabbing a quick bite to eat and settling down for the night.
After having something to eat which was surprisingly very filling, she put on her dressing gown and lay on the bed. She grabbed a book from the bedside table and started to read. Sheâd been wanting to finish this book off for a while so it was a relief to be finally getting near the end.
Just as she was getting into it, there was a knock on the door. She checked the clock on the table, it was nearly midnight. She sighed.
Oh well, I suppose I can finish it another day. Story of my life.
She opened the door to find Michael standing there.
âOh Michael hi.â
âSorry Penelope were you asleep?â
âOh no I was reading. What can I do for you?â
âI know you said no to John because you didnât want to lead him on. I mean he is a married man so he shouldnât really be how he is with you. Anyway, Iâve hardly saw you all day so I wondered if you fancied a walk with me?â
âWhat in our pyjamas?â
âYeah why not? Scotland is so beautiful at night and I thought it would be relaxing.â
âWith the others?â
âNo just me and you.â
Penny liked the sound of that. Michael seemed to have gained some confidence in expressing his feelings lately. It helped Penny start to understand exactly how Michael felt about her.
âOkay sure, sounds fun!â
âGreat, come on I know just the place we can go.â
The excitement of not knowing where she was heading filled her up inside. God Michael even looked attractive when driving. Was the man ever not attractive? Luckily Michael was a good driver so felt comfortable in his car.
So comfortable that she fell asleep for the duration of the journey. She was awoken by a gentle tap on her shoulder.
âPenelope? Weâre here.â
The view she woke up to was truly spectacular. The moonlight silhouetted against the mountains, in the distance was Doune Castle. Where Michael had decided to take her seemed so far from anywhere, from anyone.
Finally some time together without any Pythons ruining itâŚ
Michael could see Penny was admiring the scenery intently. She was sat on the grass taking in the surroundings. Nature could be so beautiful sometimes.
âBeautiful isnât it?â said Michael.
âYes it is.â
Penny thought he was talking about the scenery but in fact he meant her. The light emanating from the moon really brought out her eyes. They glowed brightly. Her hair looked so golden, natural light really brought out a personâs beauty.
Could it be that Michael was beginning to fall in love with Penelope?
âIsnât it nice to be somewhere without those pesky Pythons getting in the way?â said Michael.
âYes it is.â
âI mean donât get me wrong, theyâre like brothers to me but itâs nice to get away from them for a little while. Besides they probably find me annoying too and Iâm classed as the nice one!â
âI donât think anyone could ever be annoyed with you.â
âAh youâre so kind Penelope but I sense an inner sadness. Youâve seemed so happy since you came here. Is life at home not worth going back to?â
âWell my flat isnât so bad, well itâs comfortable enough but incredibly isolated. I used to love living on my own but being with you guys, I dunno itâs just changed all that.â
âWeâre always here for you, you know that. I know weâre not gossipy girls well except Gray or when weâre the Pepperpots but weâre always there to listen.â
âIâd always wanted a girlfriend, like a best friend who could listen to me as well as advise. I find it so difficult to make friends because I find it hard to trust people. But with you guys I trusted you right away. Strange really.â
âWhat about your parents? They must advise you on things.â
âPft them. Parents is the loosest sense of the word.â
âOh. Want to tell me about it?â
âOh Michael believe me you do not want to know about my problems. Besides itâll spoil a perfect night me depressing you.â
âI want to know. Honestly I donât mind if it depresses me. I care about you. You know that.â Said Michael with a smile.
She sighed. Talking about her âparentsâ was always a bit of a sore subject for her but she wanted to tell Michael.
âWell okay then. Basically Iâm an only child which usually means you get spoilt. Okay I was spoilt but not with love. My parents are well off hence the posh name that I detest so much, instead of giving me attention theyâd just shower me with gifts and toys. My mother was the worst, the only time sheâd speak to me was if Iâd done something wrong or she believed Iâd done something wrong. Sheâd screech Penelope! Such a horrible sound, so you see why I hated you calling me Penelope, just brought it all back to me. Anyway as I got into my teens my parents would just leave me alone at weekends, theyâd go on these weekends away. Luckily I knew how to look after myself. I wasnât abused by them, I mean my Dad showed some love towards me but he just let my Mother knock my confidence down to nothing. So yeah thatâs the story of my life, I donât want any pity, Iâm so over it.â
Michael listened intently to what Penelope had to say. He had to admit it was very upsetting to hear that she had never been loved which would explain her coldness towards other people. He, on the other hand had seen a different side to her character. A softer, more vulnerable side. All he wanted to do was hold her.
However for fear of scaring her off, he put his arm around her. She responded by snuggling closer to him, her head resting on his shoulder.
âThank you for listening Michael. I appreciate it.â
âWell Iâm not here to judge and Iâm flattered youâre not cold towards us Pythons no matter how annoying we are most of the time!â
âAre you gonna tell the others?â
âOnly when youâre ready to tell them.â
âThank you.â
For a while they just sat there, with Pennyâs head still on Michaelâs shoulder, both of them looking at the stars. How pretty they were.
âDo you ever wonder if thereâs life beyond that sky?â said Penny.
âOh I think thereâs enough beauty to see down here first before we venture into outer space!â Michael laughed.
Penny loved it when Michael was being philosophical, he was so intelligent. For once in her life she felt loved, safe in Michaelâs arms. She felt so relaxed she fell asleep.
The wind gently blew and Penelopeâs hair fell into her eyes. Michael smiled to himself and moved the hair out of her eyes. She looked so peaceful next to him, he didnât want to disturb her. However there was a reason why he brought her out hereâŚ
After a while sitting on the grass, Michael gently woke Penelope up. It was nearly 2 oâclock in the morning.
âBloody hell you sleep a lot!â
âSorry I keep falling asleep on you Michael. Iâm a very sleepy person!â
âItâs okay honestly Iâm only teasing. Anyway I brought you here for a specific reason.â
âOh yeah? Whyâs that?â
âWell we donât get that much time alone together and I wanted to get to know you better. The real you. I also wanted to be honest with you, completely honest.â
âAbout what?â
âWell about me. You see people have painted this picture of me as the Nice Python and the Cute Pythonâ"
âAll of which is trueâŚâ Penny said with a wink.
âSee you think that because everyone says it, itâs true. I mean yes I am the nice one because Iâm not a confrontational person, I donât like arguing and I probably am a bit of a pushover but thereâs so much more to me than that.â
âMichael I know trust me. Look I know what itâs like for people to just see one side of you, god knows Iâve been labelled a cold hearted bitch enough times but I suppose itâs because people donât take the time to get to know the real me. You and the guys are the only ones who have ever given me a chance and Iâll forever be grateful for that.â
âItâs so unfair isnât it? To be constantly labelled as something. I trust you Penelope and itâs strange because Iâve only known you a few days but it feels like Iâve known you for years. I didnât have the upbringing you did, my parents were very loving well my mother was. My dad well you know what fathers are like. Â Not ones for showing emotion and he canât speak very well, has an awful stutter like George VI had. I was a bit of a loner child, very shy and just watched the trains go by. I remember wanting to be a train driver at one point! Then I went to a public school in Shrewsbury, I think I discovered then I wanted to make people laugh because I was strange but funny. Maybe one day Iâll stop being a silly person and go travelling maybe even make a job out of it.â
Penny found it fascinating hearing about Michaelâs life, boy could the guy talk when he got going! But Penny didnât mind. She found him an incredibly interesting guy. She was kind of jealous of Michaelâs upbringing, it was so happy and loving. Sheâd love to meet Michaelâs parents, they sounded so nice. Ha, who was she kidding? Itâs not like she was going to end up in a relationship with himâŚ
âWell you do whatever makes you happy. Thatâs my motto in life. I mean I could have done anything with my history degree but I chose to become an actress. One of the most unreliable jobs! Think my parents would be ashamed of my career choice.â
âHave you not seen them recently?â
âI moved out as soon as I went to university. Got a part time job to support myself and been living in the apartment since I graduated ever since. I donât just act though because well itâs not the most stable job and Iâm only just starting out and I donât expect you Pythons to pay me very much!â
âOh I donât know Iâm sure we can arrange a decent wage packet for you!â
âWell thatâs very generous of you.â
Penny sensed flirtation on Michaelâs part. She loved that he was so interested in her life, sheâd never known anyone be so intrigued by her. The more she told him about her life, the more she felt she was falling for him.
He loved hearing about her life, though it was sad to hear. Would he ever get to meet her parents? They didnât seem very nice.
âSo you havenât seen your parents for 7 years?â
âNope and I have no intention of seeing them any time soon.â
âWhat work do you do alongside acting?â
âI work at my local library as an assistant. Nothing extravagant.â
âWell as long as it pays the bills.â
Thatâs what she loved about Michael, he wasnât judgemental. Was there anything that she didnât love about this man?
âHonestly Michael youâre the kindest man Iâve ever met. Youâve listened to me going on about my fucked up life and you havenât judged me, youâve just listened and no oneâs ever done that before.â
âWhen I say I care about you, I mean it. I mean you didnât have to listen to my âperfectâ childhood but you did. You care not just about the Python Michael that all the fangirls love but the other side of me. Donât think Iâve ever met a girl like you before.â
Penny scoffed. Somehow she didnât believe he hadnât said this to another girl before. She wasnât that special.
âOh Michael, I bet you say that to all the girlsâŚâ
âPenelope, Iâve been out with a few girls over the years and all of them were interested in one thing. My money and fame. They were only interested in me because Iâm a Python. Whereas you, yes youâre a big fan of Python but you donât switch off when I donât talk about Python. Trust me, youâre different.â
Penny blushed furiously. Was he really saying this to her? Maybe the moonlight has that effect on people.
âOh Michael you really are the nicest man in the world.â
Michael got closer to her face, Penny started to get butterflies in her stomach. Was he about to kiss her? THE Michael Palin? THE Mr Michael âSexy Pantsâ Palin? She made a note to herself not blurt out to Michael her nickname for him.
The wind again blew Pennyâs hair into her face. He gently moved it out of her eyes. Was this it? Was this the moment? His face turned away from her for a moment.
Then his fringe started to go all over the place, moved by the wind. Michael was clearly very cross about this. It ruined the special moment for him.
âOh! Damn hair!â
Penny giggled a little. Michael was so adorable angry.
âHere let me have a go at sorting it out for you.â
Man his hair feels so soft. Iâm surprised heâs even let me touch his hair! His hair is definitely his best feature! If only heâd kept his sideburns.
Michael quite enjoyed Penelopeâs hands in his hair and heâd never let a girl touch his hair before!
âDonât you miss your signature sideburns? They really were huge at one point!â
âIn some ways I do but they werenât around in the medieval times! Who knows I might grow them back at some point?â
âHaha I think your hair suits you long.â
âOh yeah itâs brilliant when my fringe goes in my eyes, very annoying!â
âWell you can just get it cut canât you? Bloody hell you donât half do some moaning!â Penny teased.
âI suppose youâre right Penelope. Sorry if Iâm annoying you moaning.â
âOh Michael youâre not annoying me, far from it! Iâm only teasing.â
âI know Penelope. I guess I just feel Iâm a bit boring. Iâm the boring Python!â
âNo youâre not. Â So was this the only reason why you brought me out here? To expose the real you to me?â
âNo it wasnât the only reasonâŚâ
Michael suddenly went all shy. He worried about rejection. What if heâd read the signals all wrong? He put his hand in his pocket and felt the small box. Was it even the right time?
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