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how last twilight went in my head
It’s soon been a year since Last Twilight started airing and while it did some things right, it also did many things wrong. I’m not only talking about the ending and how it ruined the whole show for me, but also smaller things that I now see more as flaws. Or maybe not flaws per se; they’re rather things that could’ve been done better if some more thought was put into the story as a whole. (Which is ironic to say when I know how many hours they already spent writing the story.)
You see, I had a lot of expectations for this series. Many of us had, I guess, and it sucks that those expectations were not met. I also acknowledge that I’m partly at fault for my own disappointment; I’m obviously only one person and no person responsible for the series would be able to read my mind and make it 100% like I wanted it to be. But they gave me the pilot trailer, left me with it for over a year before the official trailer came out, and during that time I was holding that pilot like a precious trinket in my hands. I was turning it around and around under the light, watching and studying every glimmer and reflection with wonder. I thought I knew what they were trying to tell me. I thought I understood.
Then the series came out and it strayed far from what I’d imagined it would be. Once again, not completely their fault, and I was watching the show with an open mind – I wanted to like it, however it was. But the closer to the end we got, the more I noticed that I was starting to bend my mind backwards to explain some things for myself. I started making excuses for them. And then at some point, I realized I didn’t have to do that. They shouldn’t require me to do that just to have me like what they'd created.
So I eventually accepted that Last Twilight just wasn’t for me and that I was disappointed in it. Not only did the ending land far from where I wanted it to go, but so did other things. The flaws started bothering me more. I grew a little more bitter after each day spent thinking about this show. It had become something unrecognizable, and so I had to make it right. I had to paint the picture that will never be forgotten again.
These are my thoughts on what I thought the show would be like, how the characters would be, how the relationships would develop, and where the show would end. All of this is based on the pilot trailer and many details remain vague because of that; some thing I only came up with while writing all this. I don't have a full story in my head, only bits and pieces I thought would be part of it one day.
(Most of this rant is directed towards the lovely Monica @stormyoceans and Mimi @dimpledpran, as well as maybe Leo @idaokiwatine. Otherwise, I don’t know if anyone is interested in this, but this has been stuck in my head for too long and I needed to find some relief.)
(placing the rest of this under the cut bc it got super long)
Mork’s life – past and present
The pilot trailer introduces Mork (not Mhok btw, I refuse to change my mind about that) and his side of the story very briefly. That is expected from a 4 minutes long pilot trailer that’s main point is to rouse the viewers’ curiosity and only introduce the story as it was during the time of filming that pilot. Despite the briefness, we still get the essentials: Mork is harsh spoken, a bit crude, playful, aloof, and quite melancholic at times. We learn he works as a mechanic, is friends with Porjai (not named yet in the pilot), and most importantly, has a debt he has to pay off.
They left that debt out once the show came out, and its absence made me frown. Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against the change. I like the alternative story line with Rung and how her passing has left Mork deeply scarred. I love the symbolism of Rung’s car which Mork is unable to sell because as much as he is bitter about his sister’s decision to end her life, he cannot cut her and her memory out of his own life. It’s a good premise, yet the show doesn’t really explore it enough to make it stick, so I both love it and mourn it.
Anyway, when the pilot trailer introduced the debt plot to us, I got attached to that thought. That’s probably the most accurate way to put it, to talk about any of these thoughts I will introduce here. I am attached to my own delusions of this show. So let’s continue observing them:
Mentioning Mork's debt made me assume that it was a core element of Mork’s character and his motives in the story. It would be the starting point of his journey, and I was excitedly waiting for them to tell me more in the series. What kind of debt is it? How large? Where does it originate from? Who does Mork owe money to? How does that debt affect his life? How long has that debt affected his life?
And while I was waiting for the answers, I started coming up with answers of my own:
Mork is left with his family’s debt, not his own. He's an only child who carries his parents’ debt after their unfortunate passing (accidental or organized? Irrelevant for me during that time). That debt will stand in front of Mork’s future, holding him back. It’s like a weight he cannot get rid of even if he tries, its pressure stopping him from running forward. If I have to make comparisons, I thought Mork’s story would be a bit like Jack’s in Jack & Joker; he cannot start a new life before he’s settled his debt.
These thoughts were backed by Porjai who in the pilot tells Mork to pay off his debt; to think about his future again. Ths switch seemed important somehow. Porjai doesn’t want Mork to continue living like this, always owing money to someone and struggling to survive. Things need to change for him. He needs to find something else than work, avoiding his debtors, paying off his debt, fearing for himself, and not caring about his future. There needs to be another path he can take, a better road for him to walk upon.
And then, Mork meets Day.
How would that happen? I don’t have a clear answer to this but based on what was shown and said in the pilot trailer, I somehow assumed it would happen through Porjai (which it still kind of does, but it’s more accidental in the series). The pilot trailer introduces Porjai as the person who comes up with new things for Mork to do, jobs that would pay better. This made me assume that following her ideas would eventually lead Mork to Day.
As a side note, I find it really interesting what Porjai's ideas for a better job are. When talking about quick, easy money, her offer is “dining with rich clients”. Not something you’d expect her to offer to a mechanic like Mork, right? It's nothing like what she offers to Mork in the series now. Getting Mork a random gig as an AC repairman makes a little more sense than this, though this offer also makes Porjai a completely different character.
The offer really left me thinking, okay. Mork doesn't accept it, of course, and I understand why it’s not something Mork would do based on how we see him, but why does Porjai suggest something like it? What exactly is Porjai thinking Mork should work wth? What does “dining with rich clients” actually mean? Because for me, that sounds hell a lot like she is suggesting Mork become an escort/host (at a host club???), and so that was a thought I started linking to her.
Porjai is the one talking to rich clients every day. She works as an escort/hostess somewhere and they pay good money for it. She knows it’s an easy job once you get into it and Mork could pay off his debt that way, maybe, if he was able to take the pressure. But he wouldn't, and so they find something else.
But what exactly leads Mork to ring the doorbell at Day’s house? I don’t think Porjai would have a straight connection to Day, but she could know Night.
In the series we now know, they introduce Night as a bar owner. Maybe Porjai ends up visiting Night’s bar a lot because her clients like to go there? Maybe she knows this bar owner/bartender and sometimes they talk after she’s done with her clients. She and Night are casually acquainted, not too close but on good terms, comfortable.
And then, during one of these casual talks, Night lets it slip that his brother is going blind and looking for a caretaker. (Maybe he whines about how difficult Day is being about it. Porjai is a good listener, and it’s easy to talk to her, I guess. It must be rough for Night, trying to handle it all.)
Porjai answers that she knows just the man for the job. Night decides to give it a shot.
Cue Mork’s interview for a job he’s in no way qualified for, yet he goes anyway because like the pilot says, “he has no option”. It doesn’t sound too hard, taking care of someone. But things are made a bit more difficult by Day, and so the interview scene ensues as it does: Mork reads to Day again, and despite acting like an ass in front of this rich brat that could be his future boss, Mork gets the job. Suddenly, his life is turning around. He’s on his way to paying off his debt and becoming free.
Mork needs to start thinking about his future. It’s scary because he never had the chance for that before, never got the choice. His parents were gone and he was tied to his debt before he had the opportunity to really dream. So, what does he want to do? Where does he want to go?
Will he stay around or will he leave all of this behind?
Of course, I assumed that Mork’s plan would be to get enough money to pay off his debt and then quit his job as a caretaker, no strings attached. But Day turns out to be different. Day turns out to be someone who Mork wouldn’t mind staying for. Day is more than just the money Mork gets paid, and he needs to come into terms with that, with wanting something for himself.
Day's side: His family and Mork
It will probably sound funny when I say this but back when the pilot trailer was all I had, I never really gave much thought to why Day is going blind. I know they mention an accident happening, but I thought it was just that – an accident. Something in the past. Something irreversible. Something that cannot be taken back or “fixed”, and now Day just needs to learn how to live with his new reality and move on. (No cornea transplants... I never really saw this coming when the show started. Imagine my shock when they started talking about it.)
What surprised me about the show was also the time that has passed since Day’s accident and since his vision started getting worse, and before he and Mork meet. The pilot left me thinking that Day’s vision was like that ever since the accident; that it was down to 40% (20% in the series) until they later realize that it’s getting even worse. I thought Day was still fumbling to understand his condition, to figure out how to live like this. I thought he had only recovered and spent a short time visually impaired before Mork comes into the picture, and that all these things were as new to him as Mork who has never done this kind of job before. I thought that was going to be part of their dynamic; this sense of newness and slowly learning about things together. About solving problems, finding answers, and adapting.
But well, details. Let’s move on from that.
Day is mostly introduced to us through Mork’s eyes as he infiltrates Day’s world after accepting his job. We first see the insufferable rich brat, the guy who has it all but now has somewhat less. The guy who is still grieving what he lost with his vision, yet is fiercely trying to claim it all back. He fights for his right for independence by being a stubborn mule who refuses to accept any help. He’s obnoxious, and whiny, and demanding, and a bit snobbish. He is both determined to beat his disability and so close to crumbling under the weight of his own changed reality.
Mork challenges Day in all the ways Day needs in this moment. At least this aspect of their dynamic remains in the series too, this ability Mork has to keep Day from slipping further into despair. Mork is not afraid to act like a dick to Day who is more than delighted by his boldness. He doesn’t like people treating him like glass, so Mork’s harshness and playfulness is refreshing. It reminds Day of how things used to be; of how he used to be. He even starts accepting Mork’s help after Mork drills it into Day’s skull that it doesn’t make him any weaker. They build their relationship upon mutual understanding, but I'll return to all that a bit later.
Let’s focus on Night instead and how he fits into all of this. After the pilot trailer, I never imagined that Night would somehow be the reason for Day’s accident – I never even thought he would play such a huge part in Day’s story, though I did think he would play a part in it.
My first thought about Night was that he was going to act as their mother’s eyes and ears in the house. (I didn’t know what to expect from Night’s character back then, so I just thought there would be a reason for him to stay in the house all day.) He inserts himself into every MorkDay interaction, is present, watches, and studies them. Then he relays what he’s seen to their mother, letting her evaluate Mork’s fitness for the job and how his progress is. I thought this would be a more prevalent aspect of everything, this ever present sense of being watched and judged by an outsider.
This position would've also allowed Night to be the first one to notice when MorkDay’s relationship starts changing. It's difficult for them at first, and maybe Night decides to help Mork out a little. He cares for his brother, after all. He tells Mork privately why Day chose him as his caretaker. He sees something in Mork and decides to help him out. He takes upon the role we see Master Aon carrying in the series now, working as the bridge between Mork’s world of ignorance and Day’s world of newly found obstacles.
The closeness this springs between the two obviously isn’t part of their mother’s plan. Khun Mhon/Ramon wants Mork to be a caretaker, a professional Day could rely on. She pays Mork for that. The pilot version of feels very different from the her we see in the series, yet she is equally protective of her son.
This protectiveness causes her to be a meddler, and we witness her questioning what kind of relationship Mork is building with Day once it starts feeling like it's different from what she expected. She’s heard about it from Night (who already questions Mork’s feelings, asking him if he still cares for Day only out of pity) and that makes her doubt Mork. Already attached by this point, Mork is forced to lie and reassure her that he still knows “the boundaries of his responsibility”.
Because we as viewers are privy to Mork's inner feelings, we can recognize his lie, but Day cannot. Even Day’s “superpower” doesn’t help him at this point, and he is convinced that Mork sticks around for the money only. He hates the thought, hates to think Mork is somehow forced to care for him. That Mork cannot choose for himself because he's the victim of the circumstance. And Day feels pained, feels crushed. He cried to his mother, attached to his caretaker who has somehow become a friend. He does not want this man to leave, and on some level, maybe Day's mother understands. Maybe she is able to accept that her son needs Mork, and Mork is allowed to stay until he's completed his duty.
Day's mother never quite trusts Mork, though. She knows Mork isn't being quite honest about knowing his responsibility with Day, so she worries what might become of them. I think it gets more complicated if Mork’s debt interferes and places Day in danger. Mork cannot stay if his past is haunting him; he cannot stay if his presence is threatening Day's safety. Mork probably struggles with this aspect of his life too, and eventually Day is left with the choice to either accept or tell Mork to leave (and it wouldn't be a romance if we didn't already know his answer).
I think the question of safety and Mork's ability to do his job well and remain professional would explain Day's mother's apprehension towards him better than how they explain it in the series. I somehow do not feel for her in the show because her worry over Mork’s ability to “take care of Day” (outside of his job, as Day's partner) seems so belittling towards Day as a person. She assumes that Day needs someone to take care of him for the rest of his life as if he will never be independent again. Day never tells her otherwise which I find a little strange when Day otherwise remains so adamant about doing things on his own and mastering skills that allow him independence.
(Though now that I say that, I realize that in the show, they cut off him gaining any of these skills. They don't, for example, ever make Day use a cane or learn braille – skills that I assume would be essential for his independence. He relies on Mork a lot, and even after the time skip in the last episode, he rather asks for a "stranger" to guide him to the car than takes it upon himself to get there the way we all know he can.)
In the middle of all this, come the 180 days they give Day before he loses his vision completely. It changes everything. Of course, those 180 days are not the end for Day – he's not dying or anything. They just mean there’s more for him to do, more for him to process. He needs to reach acceptance and finally find peace with his blindness.
And all that he does with Mork, with his help and alongside him, which I will talk about next.
Mork and Day, quietly in love
I think what the show really nails is the development of the MorkDay relationship or at least the basics of it. Especially the first three or so episodes feel absolutely ecstatic as we witness how the mutual distaste between MorkDay turns to curiosity, turns to understanding, turns to hesitant trust, and then to friendship and eventually a crush. It’s all so beautiful – and yet.
It moves a little too fast, I’d say. That feeling I had ever since episode 2 should’ve probably been my first warning sign that I was not about to get the story I wanted, but I always worked with it. I understood they had only 12 episodes, that they had a lot of story to cover. Some sacrifices had to be made to get all they planned to fit in.
But. (Because there obviously is a but coming, a big but.) They never used that time they stole wisely. And in my mind, I wanted everything to happen slower, to feel lazier, stickier somehow. You know, I wanted there to be more struggling, more hardship, more setbacks. Things shouldn’t have felt so linear between Mork and Day; not only up after some small bumps in the beginning, without them sometimes moving backwards, too. They were supposed to take two steps forward and one step back, not just walk ahead like it was easy to trust a stranger like that.
(That back and forth could’ve also been the way to fit Mork’s trauma into the story; to force Mork to be vulnerable when he realizes that he has to give something in order to get something back. He learns a thing about Day, Day learns a thing about him. It's only fair.)
It would just make sense if things were not easy. They’ve both gone through a lot and it’s hard to open up about those things, especially to someone who is still basically a stranger. That made me think that it would take Mork and Day longer to even tolerate each other; Day does not want Mork to be his caretaker, doesn’t want him invading his space. Mork is there for the money, not to listen to Day’s bitching. They’d rather avoid each other than actually spend time together, both agreeing to this out of mutual benefit. Mork gets paid, and Day gets his mother off his back and is free to do how he sees fit. They’re stuck together but it's the lesser evil.
But that doesn't last forever, and eventually, their curiosity wins. Mork would probably give in first, would want to know more about Day after watching him. He’s the one with the ability to work his way under Day’s skin by annoying Day to opening up. Anger makes us quite honest at times. And when Day slams the doors shut at times, literally and figuratively, Mork remains unphased by the temper tantrums. We see parts of this in the series too, but I always thought it would take them longer to find it themselves to be civil with each other.
After the door is open though, things start pouring out of it. Vulnerability stops feeling as scary. We see the one palm distance scene happen which is still one of my favorites. It’s so beautiful in the pilot, the epitome of closing the gap between them, of stepping closer. Mork wants Day to see him, and Day's curiosity is aroused.
I was honestly kind of sad that the series gave that scene to us so early. I wasn’t expecting Day to let Mork so close so soon, though I should’ve seen it coming when they turned the flirting setting so high for Mork. I just thought that scene was going to be more than just Mork flirting with Day, about him showing interest. I thought it was about understanding, about wanting to know the other. About wanting yourself to be known.
I guess my version of Mork by nature is more hesitant to approach Day than he is in the series. He is still direct and unapologetic, won’t take any shit, won’t fear to annoy Day, yet he will be hesitant in other ways. He doesn’t like being vulnerable, doesn’t initially like being seen by Day, doesn't trust so easily. It takes him time to adjust into wanting all this and thinking about it as a good thing.
He also hesitates to touch, to grab, to hold; to get physical with someone who cannot see it coming. Mork might not know a kind touch, mostly used to the roughness and violence of others.
Day would be equally hesitant because it must feel strange to touch people so openly when you cannot se them, right? At least for me, I’d find it weird and uncomfortable to grab a stranger, to suddenly hold them, even if by the arm or shoulder. (Because how do you know it’s an arm or a shoulder you're touching when you cannot see? You cannot be sure. It could be anything.) This requires adjusting from them, accepting this physicality as part of their new relationship. Mork needs to allow himself to be grabbed. Day needs to be bold enough to do it and be comfortable with it.
They discuss boundaries, both for Day and for Mork. What are they comfortable with? Are they comfortable always or only sometimes? Are there times when they do not wish to be touched? Should they announce it when they plan on touching the other? What are the rules of their interactions?
They learn yet again, try to understand. These are the steps they take during their journey as they adjust to each other and their intertwining lives. They start lowering their walls and breaking the boundaries, allowing each other closer, closer, closer.
And suddenly, Mork is no longer just a caretaker. Suddenly, Day is not just someone Mork stays with out of money. More feelings appear, and once one of them – or both of them – recognize those feelings as romantic, things start going south.
I always assumed that August would play the biggest part in making both Mork and Day admit to their feelings (and he does! The series confirms this). He’s obviously introduced as the “love rival”, the one who makes Mork jealous. He will make Mork understand that these feelings he’s having for Day go beyond professional, beyond friendship. He wants to take care of Day in a completely different way, and that makes him come face to face with a choice: to tell Day or remain silent. To stay or to leave.
Because here’s the deal: Mork is Day’s employee which requires him to stay professional with Day. There is supposed to be a certain distance between them so that Day can trust Mork as his caretaker, as his aid, as his guide. Mork is supposed to not cross any lines for Day’s safety and comfort. Mork is not supposed to be having these thoughts and feelings about Day.
In the series, I assumed they would point this out; that they would bring out the moral question of are you allowed to look at your "boss" like that, with the eyes of a potential lover, when your professional relationship is as delicate and emotionally intimate as a relationship between a caretaker and the person they’re caring for? Are you allowed to cross that line, even on a thought’s level? Does that affect the trust between you two?
In retrospect, I find it a little weird how little Last Twilight brings up this issue. Back in the day I even saw someone mention it in a post (I cannot remember who or where) after pointing out how often and easily these positions of trust allow taking advantage of the other person. Not saying that Day wouldn’t be able to fight for himself or stand his own ground if Mork was, indeed, being a creep about it, but Day unfortunately cannot see it happening. If Mork had bad intentions, I think he would have many chances to take advantage of Day’s disability. Day’s in a vulnerable position that has nothing to do with his capability.
So, why not make the viewers think about it more? Why is Mork not realizing how much power he holds? Even after he becomes aware of his feelings in the series and starts thinking Day might feel the same, it’s Porjai who points out that they’re still employer and employee. Mork works for Day, and Day is supposed to be able to trust in his professionalism no matter what.
Of course, Mork is prepared to quit his job after their kiss in the series if Day doesn’t feel the same for him. He doesn’t want to make Day uncomfortable once he’s been made aware of Mork’s feelings. But my initial expectations based on the pilot were that this conflict of positions would play a bigger part. Night questions Mork's feelings first, Day's mother does it next. Mork decides to hide behind his lies. This made me think that we would succumb into a limbo of “will he or will he not?” as both Mork and Day struggle with handling their own (slightly forbidden) feelings.
It's just that they both wish to stay like this and they both fear that the other one will leave if they were to be honest about their feelings. It feels easier to put on the mask and pretend they’re still an employer and employee. Out of selfish reasons, they both need each other. On the other hand, they both see why the other would need this relationship to remain as it is.
If we assume that we embark on the 180 days journey with MorkDay once they're already aware of their feelings and are both remaining mum about it, I think their reasons to remain go like this:
Mork stays because he doesn't want to abandon Day now that he is facing all this so suddenly. It's a big shock to Day to realize that he will lose his sight completely, and he's formed this bond with Mork that Mork hates to rip away from him when he's already feeling vulnerable. It's Mork's priority to make Day feel safe and comfortable. It's Mork's wish to make Day happy, and so he wants to stand beside Day as he faces these last 180 however many days he might have. Mork helps Day to make the most of that time he has because what else is there for Mork to do? To return to his old job and struggle again? To be forever trapped in his debt? Because at least like this he is paying off his debt slowly and not feeling as trapped.
For Day, he might hate the thought that Mork stays because of his duty, but it's also that it helps Mork. The money he's getting obviously means a lot, is more than Mork ever thought he would have. Day has seen and heard about Mork's life before, how violent it all was/is, how much he struggles. He wants Mork to stay if it will help him. He wants Mork to stay because it helps Day. He likes being with Mork and Mork makes him happy, and all this change feels a little less scary. He thinks he's learning how to live again, with Mork.
This type of setting would’ve offered a delicious opportunity to explore the slowly blurring line between their professional relationship and what can be seen as something else, something more. It would’ve offered some very delicious gay yearning, and I think these moments could’ve been depicted through scenes like the fish tank scene or the fitting room scene. Of course, those scenes work as they are now, as indicators of budding feelings between Mork and Day. But those could’ve also been scenes that show their feelings to the viewer, make them obvious to any observer, yet remain hidden from the object of those feelings himself. The want to touch, to be closer; yet the fear to be too close, to get rejected, and eventually, to lose everything.
They have six months, dedicated only to each other. They have six months before some kind of end or a beginning or whatever they wish to think of it as. Six months. I would've loved the slow burn of it all, seeing those six months shape and morph and change them.
The ending
And what about when those six months come to an end? How would things look like to them? How would the whole story eventually end?
Honestly, I think the story in my head had a lot of similarities to what we get in the first 9 episodes of Last Twilight: Mork and Day meet, start developing a bond, find happiness and a new hope in each other, Day gets his final 180 days before he goes completely blind, and MorkDay decide to spend that time exploring together. Things are nice, simple.
Yet, I think they start that journey with very different ending goals in their minds. They have very different thoughts on how things will look like to them by the end of their six months, and while they spend time together and ponder on their hidden feelings, those thoughts only solidify. And this is what I think goes on in their heads and how it shapes the final ending of my own version of this story:
Mork comes to the realization that by the end of this journey, Day will no longer need a caretaker, need him. His duty is done and he is free to go. His debt will be paid (maybe he's counted he will have enough money by then), and he can plan his future however he wishes. Maybe this even means that it is his time to go and live the life he never got to have before. Why would he stay if Day no longer needs him? If other bonds (friendship, companionship) remain, they will be able to keep in touch through their phones, even if from a distance.
For Day, it's all very different. He might be very hesitant at first, not quite trusting his own feelings, not quite believing in himself. But after each day, after each moment spent with Mork, he grows a little surer. He knows what he wants. He knows what he wants from this future Mork has helped Day realize is still in front of him.
He wants Mork. He wants them to stay together.
So, during his last seeing moments, Day gathers his courage and kisses Mork. That is his last image, the last thing he wishes to do, the only image that is missing and the only image that will forever remain. Admitting to Mork that he likes him and accepting that he wants to be with Mork in the future are his ending and beginning. He is finally being honest about everything.
Day wants more, not just a caretaker. Mork is now free to accept or refuse.
Of course, by this point, we would all know that Mork will accept. He will be delighted to accept. What else is there when we can so clearly see the deep bond between them? How could they ever part when they mean so much to each other? They're the only two that have remained "blind" to the inevitable.
And so we get that yes, and another kiss. Followed by the happiest smiles they've ever shown us, maybe some tears even. Day holding Mork’s face between his hands and taking in the darkness, yet feeling happy in it. He has a future with Mork. He will build a future that has them both in it.
I don’t know if I would require much more story after that. Beyond hearing Mork’s answer to Day after finishing their journey together, I never asked for much else. It would be satisfying if done right, if it feels like both of them have found peace and purpose. They start off as troubled individuals and end up happy, content, together.
Maybe I would be a little greedy though, and accept a time skip which shows us glimpses of MorkDay’s life after. Day is doing something new with his life that makes him feel satisfied. Mork is finally living for himself.
I wanted there to be hints about what Mork might want to do throughout the story/journey, just like they gave hints in the series that Day would love to own a bookshop later. I never quite bought Mork’s cooking career in the series – I know they paint it so that Mork enjoys cooking, especially to others/those he loves, but it never fully felt like his own choice to become a chef. It feels more like something he has to do because at first, he enters the chef position for money. He loses his job as a caretaker and has to find something else to live on. It makes it once again feel less like his own choice and more like a survival instinct.
And so, we have come to the end of my string of thoughts. This is what I had in my head about Mork and Day, how I thought the story of Last Twilight would go. This is what the pilot left me with after giving me its impeccable vibes. Would this be a better series? For me, definitely. Others might disagree, but I did not write this for you anyway so, sorry.
Just… Last Twilight could’ve been so much, so different. And even a year later I still mourn the fact that it was not, that it will never be. Such wasted potential, but I’ll love it anyway. I’ll love the parts I've managed to salvage.
(Thank you for reading if you did read this whole thing! Feel free to discuss this idea with me if you want to or point out any things I might remember incorrectly/have forgotten. My inbox is open and so are my dms, I won't bite ^^)
#last twilight#morkday#idk what else to tag this as#these are just stray thoughts#but i need to shout them into the void#and maybe someone will answer?#who knows#also i've edited this text a lot but#excuse me if there are any typos or#just things that don't make sense#am tired and feeling insane#so take this out of my hands pls am begging
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staff @/macmanx guilt trip
list of staff + more issues
#post nuked bc proshippers started insulting people who rbed this and implied partyjockers attempted to Kill staff? it was getting old so#archive links still under the cut if you want and you can rb this from others if you want the og#hint: if you dislike this post or want to debunk parts of it the way to go about it isn't to call people who've rbed it 'disgusting little#fuck ups' that are 'spreading anti shipper lies'#note: this post is and was Not about ship discourse jesus fucking christ proshippers get a grip#also ace discoursers are here too? this isn't about you either?#edit 2: if you send me an anon regarding this post about how im policing discussion or 'don't really want it'#but then stop replying when i answer your ask#maybe that's. not helping discussion?#i nuked this post as people started making up false accusations to smear people staff sniped. aka accusing someone of IRL ATTEMPTED MURDERS.
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Ok this is a long shot but I’ve been looking for this for years. Circa maybe 2017. There used to be an artist on here that was a classically trained oil painter who painted these elegant scenes where the subject was always a twink model posed erotically with very poorly drawn MSPaint style anime guys as if it was a someone’s deviantart OC photoshopped into a picture, but it was all part of the painting. He would post his pieces displayed next to the irl twink model he painted. Help me find him
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based on a dream i had some nights ago
it was a pretty fun experience this was me after
#my art#digital art#comic art#it was fun i had a good time#also auRHGH this was a longun to make#i cant do the dream justice it was really surreal#maybe this advice can help someone out too#we dont gotta rush life dont gotta know who we are right away#i think the question of who am i is somethin thatll never have a single unchanging answer#cuz we're creatures that always change#so#yeah#ok goodnight kissie smoochie for your head thank u for lookin at my art
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In your Spitfire AU, since Zuko is looking after Lu Ten II, what happened to Ursa?
Zuko is slightly older in the Spitfire AU. He was banished at fifteen, his head a little clearer and denial a little weaker than in canon. After his first look through the Air Temples, Zuko decides that if he can't find a myth, he might as well search for the next best thing.
Finding Ursa isn't easy, but in time he makes it to a secluded house in a near-forgotten part of the world. His mom is there, older and stronger and alive.
But she isn't alone.
And Zuko, as it turns out, didn't keep the best company during his search.
When Ursa is discovered and her secrets are laid bare for assassins (for Ozai) to find, she begs Zuko to take his little brother and run. She'll do anything it takes to protect her children, even if that means leaving them behind to keep a target off their back. Ursa diverts attention from them and allows Lu Ten's ancestry to be kept a secret. She orders Zuko not to follow her again, and disappears.
Zuko is left with a little three-year-old brother to raise and a mother he cannot hold onto.
#dema answers#atla#spitfire#Spitfire AU#prince zuko#atla ursa#Lu Ten II#The Ursa/Hakoda parallels are going to be insane in this one I swear#It's okay tho#It's absolutely intentional#(The other option was killing her. But I happen to find family conflict and abandonment issues way more compelling to write)#Luckily Zuko isn't alone. He's a mess of course—and raising the little brother you never knew you had isn't easy.#But he has Uncle and (once those loyal to his father have been taken care of) he also has his crew.#Look three years into the future and you've got a six-year-old Spitfire running around the ship and giving Zuko early gray hair#Ursa will be reunited with them in the future. I just don't know when would that happen yet.#Probably post-war#She returns to her children only to come face to face with their overprotective found family (aka the Gaang)#Their reunion would be quite messy at first but...it'll all be okay#They all love each other deeply. And sometimes love isn't enough. Sometimes there are things that you can't forgive or forget.#But Ursa did everything she did because she loved them. And Zuko knows that. Zuko understands that.#(He was forced to make the same decision in Ba Sing Se—giving yourself up and leaving the people you love behind so that they're safe)#(He understands)#But Lu Ten II doesn't#He doesn't remember Ursa. Not really. He knows of her what Zuko and Uncle tell him. But he doesn't remember ever having a mother.#(Tara is soft and warm and kind to him. She holds him and takes care of him and makes sure he's well-behaved. And he loves her.)#(Is that what makes a mother? Or is it the blood you share?)#Ursa isn't much like Tara. But she loves him dearly—there's a reason he has the name of someone who was so dear to her.#She is Lu Ten's mother. Zuko's mother. Uncle's sister.#And she isn't like Tara. But she loves him even if he can't remember her.#So maybe he can learn to love her back.
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Happy Holidays to me I made a comic of these two.
Rest of the comic down below. It’s not explicitly NSFW. They’re just making out and REALLY feeling it. Pants stay on tho 👌
#asoryuu#ryunosuke naruhodo#kazuma asogi#ace attorney#the great ace attorney#ryuuaso#tgaa#dgs#my art#comic#I didn’t use any references for their positions so I was just winging it and PRAYING#I did use references for the kissing bc KISSES ARE HARD TO DRAW???#they feel so awkward and just…ugh…but I wanna draw kisses so badlyyyy#anyways yes this whole comic is just about Kazuma being a bottom#bottom Kazuma supremacy#it is the objectively correct answer#I love cool rational characters crumbling to someone they’re down bad for#maybe I’ll color this one day…probably not#ALSO I DID THE ENTIRE LAST PAGE ON THE BUMPIEST CAR RIDE EVER#was not fun :((((#anyways please reblog and comment for my troubles THANK YOU 🙏
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My auntie keeps Golden Guernsey goats on our island, like many of our local unique breeds of livestock they nearly went extinct in the starving during ww2 occupation surviving by only one smuggled flock. They're super friendly and energetic and their colouration might be of interest :eyes:
Oh OH these are very pretty
#it's extremely cool and admirable that your aunt is helping to preserve a rare heritage breed of livestock#these goats are gorgeous#wonderful caramel colors#they look highly pettable#answered#anonymous#also this is beside the point but a few years back I was really interested in the history and cultures of the Channel Islands Isle of Man#and the archipelagos of Scotland#I remember thinking that I've never interacted with anyone who lives in any of those places at least to my knowledge#and my chances of coming across someone organically are fairly low so I probably never will#maybe it's weird to say but I just think it's terribly neat that there's at least one Channel Islander in existence who has seen my art
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Spite
Danny made himself known to the world by hacking into the Justice League's communications line. Amity was safe but he was so tired of being ignored that the moment he figured out how to isolate his small town from the rest of the world he decided to let the heroes know they had failed.
He posted all the ignored calls, the GIW legal documents, the experiments, everything that would let them know that they had failed. Because he had saved himself and the others but never got help.
In a very short time Amity declared itself independent, similar to Atlantis or Themyscira; they didn't need anything from the rest of the world anyway.
At first the League thought it was the attack of a villain or some new organization.
It became very obvious that this was not the case the more they confirmed the information presented, from a law passed under their noses to the threat of exterminating an entire race of beings that were much stronger than them but decided to chose a peaceful route instead of just destroying everything.
For the first time in years, the League felt useless. The weight only increased when the last piece of "evidence" turned out to be the death certificate of Daniel Fenton, the first victim of the whole mess.
#dpxdc#ghost king danny#Danny was tired of being ignored#and maybe he's being unfair to the League#but they never answered his calls#all the times he needed a helping hand#or someone to help him heal his wounds#a guide to follow#he never got that#and that is a hundred times more unfair in his mind#dp x dc#dc x dp#Amity survived well on its own#and the Infinite Realms have infinite things to offer#so they don't need more allies#The League doesn't know what to do#Should they apologize or leave them alone?
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Wait is the middle picture from those three sketches that one scene from the wigmaker job?
yes! it's this specific passage where lucanis is just seething with rage and trying to keep a lid on it, and illario's a stablising, comforting presence. BROTHERS!!!!! <3 though i chose to draw his hand on his shoulder rather than his arm i guess. artistic liberty!
#in the future i want to discuss lucanis' anger in the short story + how spite would have made it worse#and how in my beautiful mind illario would have been the one to help him#no blood magic needed!!!!#like its a point of serious issues between the both of them and the relationship is like obviously fraught#and illario still gives his ambition pause because lucanis is losing himself to a demon and he drags him away from it#illario being a positive force despite his goals/lack of morality/etc is so interesting to me like. it doesnt matter what he's done#or the what's he's trying to do and all the usurping. lucanis is soothed just when his family is near#same applies to caterina to a . lesser extent. if they deserve this reaction from him is another thing#i also think. and important to note. that lucanis' internal narration never worries about illario's ability to finish the job#he sometimes giggles in his mind about illario not having the best balance or footing#but does not worry about the assassination being botched . and i also thought#the line 'i'm only here because of you' implies lucanis wants him to come on the job#considering he was the only one hired (the elf that greets them not recognising why he had someone with him)#so. i dont know why im saying all this actually. maybe just more on lucanis' dependancy on and care for illario + vice versa#lucanis dellamorte#illario dellamorte#answered#anonymous
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(I'm a security guard.)
#There is an overwhelming number of traumatized people who work in security#So many of us have histories of abuse#Or other things#And I wonder so often#I'm good at my job#But am I attracted to power?#I like helping people#I don't like hurting people#Or picking on anyone#But it's hard to know what the right answers are sometimes#Part of my job is working with police#Even if I disagree with them#I tell myself it's better that I'm the guard here#And not someone malicious#Or cruel#But how much am I really changing?#And am I using my power correctly#Or will I become the unreasonable authority that made me the scared person I am#Is it already too late?#What if the calls I'm unsure of are the warning signs#Maybe I'm already too late#Maybe my sense of morality and justice is eroding#To fit the hole I've placed myself in#Maybe I'm not chipping at the walls fast enough#Maybe I'm being reshaped#Just being here#Maybe my conflict of conscience is the internal monologue of a sympathetic villain#Maybe I'm the bad guy#Teablart
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From X-Men Annual #4
There's so much in this panel. Like, why are the X-Men so bad at gift giving? Who would give Kurt like that awful shirt? Binoculars? Weights?? Why is Logan eating that stark white turkey thigh? Who prepared that? D-did Logan go to a Kinkos and get his face printed for his gag gift? Was that a nice photo? Who took that photo? Did he pay a photographer? Is the real gift from him that nice stetson? If so, why doesn't Kurt wear it?
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Hey! Just wanted to say I’m in awe of how your writing it’s just so GOOD and FUN and TORUROUS. It’s rly hard to nail the voices and dialogue of characters (especially when writing them speaking in english!) but you always make it so believable. Ur Vale especially is sooo charismatic which like hats off bc a more mercurial man has not been made.
Re ur charged-airport-conversation fic, I’m intrigued to find out how Marc will handle his sexuality crisis. Will he be in denial? does he very seriously study gay culture like telemetry data? is he getting Grindr? is he seeing it as something to incorporate into his PT routine & somehow translate this to a competitive edge? how did he feel about the pope saying frociaggine????
Also I loved the goofy brother shenanigans, Alex strongest most patient and silliest man alive truly. Extremely funny to think of Alex “please get a girlfriend you’re 30 and annoying me” Marquez having to cope with Marc coming back like “I found one! :3” holding hands with Cervera’s enemy #1 undisputed champ 2015-2024
Anyways, would love to hear any thoughts u had but no pressure! I just wanted to thank u for ur brilliant mind & forget about whatever fresh hell that sprint was
this one. is one that i plan to maybe actually and fr write out so i shant answer in full because i hope that you'll find out eventually. um. i CAN give you chapter two! of THIS fic where Marc and Vale get stuck in an airport and have a somewhat fraught little bonding session. i have not proofread this OR reread the original so if there's inconsistencies just chill out. theres also a lot of liberties taken with the amount of privacy these guys have on a given race weekend again just chill out. please. they live in different countries and are bitter rivals its hard to get them alone into fictional scenarios. its about 1.4k.
(Part ONE !)
The next time he sees Vale is in the paddock.
It's not unusual to see him— the paddock is small and Vale is always a presence, felt even when he’s gone, indelible—but it’s on the television more often than not these days. Maybe a glimpse of him zooming around on his scooter, ignoring the swing of the camera phones tracking him in his wake. But it’s not like this, never this close up. Vale maintains distance, and Marc has adapted to take his cues from that same distance. He’s not going to be the first to engage, not anymore.
All that being said, Marc is trying to grab some alone time in between sessions, communing with his lunch and contemplating ways to improve his breaking into Turn 11. He’s tucked into a shady place out of the way, generally out of the range of any stray cameras, when Vale catches him, sliding next to him on the table and leaning forwards on his elbows.
He starts picking at Marc’s food.
Marc reacts reflexively, not even processing that it's Vale who’s at his elbow who is reaching over to snag a bit of his chicken. He lifts his bowl out of reach like he would with Alex. “Hey— that's mine,”
Vale’s game, apparently, shooting him one of those dangerous grins, eyes crinkling at the sides towards Marc like he hasn’t seen in years. He’s brimming with the confidence of someone used to getting away with breaking rules. Marc puts down his food. Lifts a hand, adjusts the cap at the top of his head, and tucks his hair behind his ear.
This means something. He doesn’t know what.
“Allora, you were not eating it.”
And Marc has always been easy for it—the simple skill he has in spinning a situation into the brightest version of itself, mood turning on a dime. Even when he was destroying Marc, he would do it with a smile.
It’s that same silverbright thread that makes Marc laugh, disbelieving, a shock of delight. He shoves at the edge of Vale’s arm, jockeying with his elbow. He bites his lip, shakes his head. Would you look at that?
“Presumptuous,” Marc scolds, and tucks back into his lunch, forking another bite into his mouth. Vale grins and leans closer, conspiratorial. That same hot, embarrassed feeling from the airport rears its head, giddy. Marc glances around. There’s no one here. He feels like there is. LIke there’s eyes on them, even though he’d chosen a place where there shouldn't be.
It feels like crossing a line, teetering on the edge of some cliff, one toe over the edge. Hot and anticipatory in the pit of his stomach. There’s a breeze going, and he shivers. Vale leans closer.
He likes it.
He also knows that he shouldn't like it. He’s gone through this song and dance before. This feeling, this hero worship that he has with Vale never leads him down any good road. He thought– six premier class titles and nearly ten years of vitriol had been an effective cure. Not so, he’s finding out.
Vale corrects, “I see what I see. This I cannot help.”
“Oh yeah? You’ve been watching me?
Vale shrugs, steals another bite. “You do manage to put on a good, ah, show.” He finds the words in Spanish. Marc can’t remember the last time they spoke in Spanish.
Marc takes a breath in. Settles himself. He doesn’t know what the end goal is here. Curiosity wins out— it’s better than wondering why Vale’s here in the first place. What game he’s trying to play. What he thinks he’ll get out of being nice to Marc, aside from that shivery feeling clawing its way up the base of his spine. He should really at least find out if he’s doing this because he plans on not being nice to Marc.
“How did you find me?” Is what he goes with. Neutral enough.
“You are not hard to find.” The answer is vague, but frank. Vale loves to speak around things.
Marc raises an eyebrow, decides to just keep looking at him. They both know he’s bullshitting. Vale breaks, and makes a face, shrugging.
“I have been racing here longer than you. I know the hiding spots.”
Marc gives him a minute roll of the eyes. It's still not an answer. “You know, they remodeled not too long ago. The entire layout changed.” Vale would’ve had to work to find him.
“Not too much!” Vale spreads his palms cheerfully, seizing on a diversion. “The bones are still the same. The stands are over there,” he juts a thumb, “The pits are here. The bathrooms change, but bah. It’s a facelift.”
Marc wrangles down a smile. Vale’s not being serious— he’s being fun. Maybe he’s trying to get him comfortable for some reason. “A lot changes, I think.” He says frankly, and he means it.
Vale’s eyes flash. He sees Marc’s conviction, catches the double meaning. Another one of their conversations centering around two different issues on the surface, but coming back to their history all the same. The elephant in the room butting into other topics. History, division, and rivalry, all sneaking its way into the cracks in their words.
Vale keeps going, the lead in their little play.
“Maybe. But it’s not— like, aerodynamics, new regulations, new tires— all that changes. Small stuff. Opinions, riders. But it is still a paddock. I’ve been in paddocks my entire life. You can’t change much.”
Things change a lot, in Marc’s experience. People. Teams. Bodies.
Friendships.
And Marc is brave usually, has made a career out of it, so he feels like he has to ask. No use avoiding it and feeling half out of his skin for the rest of the day. Vale’s knee bumps into his own and he closes his eyes briefly. When he opens them Vale is already looking at him
“Why are you here?” He levels.
Vale throws him a soft smile. It comforts exactly no part of Marc.
“Maybe I was looking for a hiding place.”
Marc hesitates, choosing his words carefully. It’s always a spar with Valentino; even when they were friendly, they were still competing.
“Am I the hiding place?”
“Well, I am still more famous than you, is true. Less photographers on you than me. It’s peaceful.”
“What do you want from me?”
“Now there’s a good question.” Vale says, stealing something else off of Marc’s plate. “Today? I was hungry. I thought I’d stop by and eat with an old friend.” The words jolt through Marc like a highside. He’s in the air— lost, flying, falling.
Vale stands, towering. He claps Marc on the shoulder. It burns white hot. Marc keeps his eyes on him, trying to catch a hint, a clue as to how this all happened.
An old friend.
“Is that what we are?” He asks, more earnest than he should be. Vale can be such a bastard.
“Well, what would you call it?” He responds, turning the question on Marc, voice quiet. Serious, like he knows whatever hangs between them is as thin as a spiderweb. Marc swallows.
“I don’t know,” Marc answers. still too honest, even now. Something flickers on Vale’s face, too quick and complex for him to read.
“Think about it.” Vale prompts, and walks away.
Marc finds out that they weren’t alone, in that section of the paddock the next day. The pictures hit the news after the race, headlines rolling in thankfully after Marc has left for home. Valentino Rossi and Marc Marquez sharing lunch, alone on a race weekend ten years after their falling out. What could it mean?
But Marc’s eyes look at the photo and just catch on Vale’s shoulders, leaning towards Marc, the palm of his hand, arcing through the air as he gestures, frozen on the screen of his phone, and himself, eyes crinkled at the corners. He was wrong. He didn’t manage to reign in that smile after all.
FRIENDS AGAIN?, the headline asks, and Marc wonders.
#to answer your quastion. a little bit.#marc thinks its adolescent hero worship. which is good excuse until youre thirty and supposed to hate someone#and then youre maybe friends again and you STILL feel the same and also are having sex dreams at ur big age.#motogp#callie speaks#asks#rosquez#my fic#airport au
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The Sollux expressions are so sweet!!! Why's he crying in the last one?
your ask is 2mths old so sorry aghk 👁️
basically the answer is that i draw expressions reflecting my mood arnd that character LOL
#thanks for ur interest :} the alternate answer wld be that space feels infinitely colder after losing someone close 2 u#i have a few more srclinks i wanna add to the solpost but arghh ive scattered them everywhere . ill pop em in once i find em#ask#anon#homestuck#karkat vantas#aradia megido#sollux captor#arapostings#2024#vioart#+ going on tentative break for now be back in a bit hm maybe earlier if i can manage the anxiety palpitations before then#if u see my main poking around (@hivepixels) do not be alarmed#ik some ppl might be spooked by it.. isoke fear not. im jst an ant peeking thru ur aisles collecting crumbs for my house
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As usual I read your tags always and so you said Apollo did not ask for resurrection of Asclepius and Hyacinthus so i just wanted to share this. About Asclepius death I read it on theoi.com, that earlier authors don't make him resurrect as a god but that's a later development mentioned only by Roman authors like Cicero, Hyginus and Ovid. But still Apollo has a role in Ovid's version
Ovid, Fasti 6. 735 ff (trans.Boyle) (Roman poetry C1st B.C. to C1st A.D.) : Clymenus [Haides] and Clotho resent the threads of life respun and death's royal rights diminished. Jove [Zeus] feared the precedent and aimed his thunderbolt at the man who employed excessive art. Phoebus [Apollon], you whined. He is a god; smile at your father, who, for your sake, undoes his prohibitions [i.e. when he obtains immortality for Asklepios].
So here it is actually because of Apollo the decision was taken to resurrect him as god. And with Hyacinthus, I don't think I've read about Artemis playing the primary role. I know in Sparta there was a picture of Artemis, Athena and Aphrodite carrying Hyacinthus and his sister to heaven.
This is not on theoi.com but I saw on Tumblr it's from Dionysiaca by Nonnus
Second, my lord Oiagros wove a winding lay, as the father of Orpheus who has the Muse his boon companion. Only a couple of verses he sang, a ditty of Phoibos, clearspoken in few words after some Amyclaian style: Apollo brought to life again his longhaired Hyacinthos: Staphylos will be made to live for aye by Dionysos.
So since he is singing inspired by amyclean stories it probably means in that place it was believed Apollo was the one to bring back his lover to life.
Apollo as god of order was very important so i think it shows how special these people (and admetus too) were to him that he decided to go against the order for them 🥺
ANON!! Shakes you like a bottle of ramune!! BELOVED ANON!!!!! I'm littering your face with kisses, I'm anointing you with olive oil and honey - you absolutely made my night with this because, not only did I get the pure serotonin shot of having someone interact with my tags (yippee, wahoo!!) I also got to have that wonderful feeling of "oh wow, have I misunderstood something that was integral to my understanding of this myth/figure this whole time or is this a case of interpretational differences?" which is imo vital for my aims and interests as someone who enjoys mythological content and literature.
I'll preface my response with this: Hyacinthus is by far the hardest of these to get accounts for because his revival itself, as you very astutely point out, is generally accounted for in painting/ritual format which muddies the waters on who interceded for what. I wasn't actually familiar with that passage from the Argonautica - and certainly didn't remember it so thank you very much for bringing it to my attention!
That said, what I've come to understand, both about Hyacinthus and about Asclepius is that in the accounts of their deaths, Apollo's position is startlingly clear.
For Hyacinthus, it is established time and again that Apollo would have sacrificed everything for him - his status, his power, his very own immortality and divinity. Ovid writes that Apollo would have installed him as a god if only he had the time:
(Ovid. Metamorphoses. Book X. trans. Johnston)
Many other writers too speak of how Apollo abandoned his lyre and his seat at Delphi to spend his days with Hyacinthus, but they also all agree that when it came to his death - he was powerless. Ovid gives that graphic account of Apollo's desperation as he tries all his healing arts to save him to no avail:
(Ovid, Metamorphoses Book X. Apollo me boy, methinks him dead. trans Johnston)
Bion, in one of his fragments, writes that Apollo was "dumb" upon seeing Hyacinthus' agony:
(Bion, The Bucolic Poets. Fragment XI. trans Edmonds)
Even Nonnus in the Dionysiaca speaks constantly of Apollo's helplessness in the face of Hyacinthus' fate where he writes that the god still shivers if a westward wind blows upon an iris:
and when Zephyros breathed through the flowery garden, Apollo turned a quick eye upon his young darling, his yearning never satisfied; if he saw the plant beaten by the breezes, he remembered the quoit, and trembled for fear the wind, so jealous once about the boy, might hate him even in a leaf...
(Nonnus, Dionysiaca, Book 3. trans Rouse)
And the point here is just that - Apollo, at least as far as I've read, cannot avert someone's death. He simply can't. Once they're already dead - once Fate has cut their string - all Apollo's power is gone and he can do nothing no matter how much he wants to. And this is, as far as I know, supported with the accounts of Asclepius as well!
Since you specifically brought up Ovid's account, I'll also stick only to Ovid's account but in Metamorphoses when we get Ovid's version of Coronis' demise, he writes that Apollo intensely and immediately regrets slaughtering Coronis. He regrets it so intensely that he, like he does with Hyacinthus, does his best to resuscitate her:
(Ovid, Metamorphoses Book Two. Apollo's regret)
And like Hyacinthus, when it becomes clear that what has happened cannot be undone, Apollo wails:
(Ovid, Metamorphoses Book Two. Apollo wept.)
Unlike his mother, Asclepius in her womb had not yet died and so, with the last of Apollo's strength, he does manage, at least, to save him.
(Ovid, Metamorphoses Book Two. Apollo puts the 'tearing out' in Asclepius.)
But it goes further than even that because Ocyrhoe, Chiron's daughter, a prophetess who unduly gained the ability to directly proclaim the secrets of the Fates, upon seeing the baby Asclepius, immediately prophesies his glory, his inevitable death and then his fated ascension:
(Ovid. Metamorphoses, Book Two. Ocyrhoe's prophecy. trans Johnston)
Before she too succumbs to her hubris and is transformed by the Fates into a horse so she can no longer speak secrets that aren't hers to share.
These things ultimately are important because it establishes two very important things: 1) Apollo can't do anything in the face of the ultimate Fate of mortals, which is, of course, death and 2) even when Apollo is Actively Devastated, regretful, yearning, mournful, guilty or some unholy combination of all of the above, when someone is dead, he accepts that they are gone. Even if he is devastated by it, even if he'll cry all the rest of his days about it - if they're dead? Apollo lets them go. In Fasti, when Zeus brings Asclepius back, he does not say Apollo asked him to - Zeus, or well, in this case Jove, brings Asclepius back because he wants Apollo to stop being mad at him.
(Ovid, Fasti VI. Apollo please come home your father misses you. trans. A.S Kline)
Even Boyle's translation which you used above in your findings hints that Zeus made Asclepius a god because he wanted Apollo to stop grieving. (i.e 'smile at your father', 'for your sake [he] undoes his prohibitions')
And like, Apollo was deeply upset by Asclepius' death - apart from killing the Cyclops in anger, in book 4 of the Argonautica, Apollonius writes that the Celts believe the stream of Eridanus to be the tears Apollo shed over the death of Asclepius when he left for Hyperborea after being chastised by Zeus for killing his Cyclops:
But the Celts have attached this story to them, that these are the tears of Leto's son, Apollo, that are borne along by the eddies, the countless tears that he shed aforetime when he came to the sacred race of the Hyperboreans and left shining heaven at the chiding of his father, being in wrath concerning his son whom divine Coronis bare in bright Lacereia at the mouth of Amyrus.
It all paints a very clear picture to me. Apollo did not ask for either of them to be brought back. Though bringing them back certainly pleased and delighted him, they are actions of other gods who are moved by Apollo's grief and mourning and seek to mollify him. Him not asking doesn't mean he didn't want them back which I think is a very important distinction by the by, but it simply means that Apollo knows the natural order of things and, even if it hurts, he isn't going to press his luck about it.
Which, of course, brings us to Admetus. And I'm really not going to overcomplicate this, Admetus is different because, very vitally, Admetus is not dead. Apollo can't do a thing once Fate has been carried out and Death has claimed a mortal but you know what he absolutely can do? Bargain like hell with the Fates before that point of inevitability. And that's what he does, ultimately for Admetus and Alcestis. He sought to prolong Admetus' life, not revive him from death or absolve him from death altogether and even after getting the Fates drunk, he's still only able to organise a sacrifice - a life for a life - something completely contingent on whether some other mortal would be willing to die in Admetus' place and not at all controllable by Apollo's own power.
All of these things, I think come back to that point you made - that Apollo's place as a god of order is very important and therefore these people are very special to him if it means he's willing to go against that order but, I also wish to challenge that opinion if you'd let me. Apollo's place as a god of order is very important and therefore, I would argue, that it is even more important that it is shown that he does not break the divine order, especially for the people that mean the most to him. The original context of my comments which started this conversation were on this lovely, lovely post by @hyacinthusmemorial which contemplated upon Asclepius from the perspective of an Emergency Medical personnel and included, in their tags, the very poignant lines "there's something about Apollo letting go when Asclepius couldn't that eats my heart away" and "you do what you can, you do your best, but you don't ever reach too far" and I think that's perfectly embodied with the Apollo-Asclepius dichotomy. Apollo grieves. He wails, he cries, he does his best each and every time to save that which is precious to him but he does not curse their nature, he does not resent that they are human and ultimately, he accepts that that which is mortal must inevitably die. There is nothing that so saliently proves that those who uphold rules are also their most staunch followers - if Apollo wants to delight in his place as Fate's mouthpiece, he cannot undo Fate. And, if even the god of healing and order himself cannot undo death, what right does Asclepius, mortal as he is, talented as he is, have to disrespect it?
The beauty of these stories isn't that Apollo loved them enough to bring them back. The beauty is that Apollo loved them enough to let them go.
#this is such a long ass post oh my god#ginger answers asks#This totally got away from me but I AM PASSIONATE ABOUT THIS AAAA#Anon beloved anon I hope you don't take this as me shutting you down or anything because that really isn't what I'm trying to do#I'm definitely going to dig more into the exactness of 'who petitioned for Hyacinthus to be revived actually?"#I always stuck to the belief that it was Artemis because of the depictions of his revival + his procession is usually devoid of Apollo#I know some renaissance paintings have him and Apollo reuniting but that's usually In The Heavens y'know#I genuinely couldn't think of any accounts that have Apollo Asking for anyone to be revived#Apollo does intercede sometimes but that's usually for immortals like Prometheus#Or even when he's left to preside over Zagreus' revival and repair in orphic tradition#Concerning Asclepius there's like a ton to talk about tbh#There's the fact that in some writings (in quite a lot actually) the reason Asclepius was killed wasn't necessarily that he brought someone#back - it was that he accepted money for it#Pindar wrote about it and Plato talks about how if Asclepius really did accept gold for a miracle then he was never a son of Apollo#It's a whole thing really#I think it's very important that it's Asclepius in his mortal folly that tests the boundaries of life and death tbh#The romanticisation of going to any length to bring back a loved one is nice and all#But sometimes the kindest and most lovely thing you can do for someone is to accept it#Just accept that they're gone - accept that there was nothing that could be done and even if the grief is heavy - keep living#Maybe we won't all get our lost loves back#But there are definitely always more people worth loving if you just live long enough to find them#apollo#asclepius#zeus#admetus#greek mythology#ovid#oh my god so much ovid#hyacinthus#coronis
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Appreciate the little things.
Not to ignorantly deny all of the big bad things in the world, but to survive them.
#magpie ramblings#there's so much shit going on that it gets overwhelming#and it's sad that we've made ourselves feel guilty for looking away when it's too painful to watch#but we literally CAN'T survive if we keep dwelling on the unfairness of the world#and the more you ask why can't this happen or why is that happening#the quicker it is to just ask 'why do anything at all?' ... the answer is simple#'just because'#so fuck it#i'm going to appreciate a short video of someone drawing a cat; just because#i'm going to read a book about a long lost culture and history; just because#i'm going to post personal book reviews of books hardly anyone has heard of; just because#i'm going to be thankful that my indoor plants have been doing well; just because#i'm going to let someone make a decision i don't agree with and not confront them; just because#i'm going to spend the little of my own money helping maybe just one other person in the world; just because#i'm going to be kind to those who haven't treated me kindly; just because#i'm going to smile regardless of the unjust in this world; just because
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what do you think toshiro's version of laios would've been like if he was still with the group during the shapeshifter shenanigans
there have been a few speculations in the tag and among the fans and they are all very good SO i am going to take this opportunity to insert a bit of my shipping bias as i like in my interpretation LMAO agdsfgdfgv
i noted that in actuality shuro seems to have a very good grasp on laios' character??? this is most obvious in the manga later on but even seeing how he criticises laios in their fight... iirc nothing he says is actually untrue or wildly exaggerated, and while he does express frustration over something he feels like laios Should have control over (noticing his cues), he is also aware that laios isnt being malicious and that hes Just Like That. what i mean to say is that while i think his version of laios may seem more pushy and in-your-face, i dont think it will be overwhelmingly so. if its post-fight, i think the idea of laios (and marcille) being willing to do anything to get falin back made a big impression on him, as well as the idea that they need to eat and rest in order to succeed in their goals, so those aspects would be prominent in his version. he seems pretty observant, so i think for the most part the physical traits would line up, but i think there would be specific things that stand out to him that would appear strangely striking on his version of laios (like. idk something about his eye colour or the subtle contrast of his armour and chainmail. he seems to have a weird sense of aesthetics if extras are anything to go by lmao). if hed actually been paying attention all those times laios had gone on about what the hell ever, then it might be even MORE hard to tell apart his version since he would also have a good grasp on what laios should know. so either his version of laios is pretty difficult to pick out, OR despite the character being accurate his appearance is too. stylised lmao (exaggerated features or something) OR!! they just get him to pull out his monster gourmet guide thing and are able to tell from there. iirc everyone was surprised at its appearance so its possible toshiro had also never seen it before
IN MY IMAGINARY SHIPPING SCENARIO............ lets say that his laios isnt able to be picked out immediately and that the monster guide thing also doesnt immediately occur to anyone. what the real laios Specifically notices is how close this other laios keeps getting to shuro. and hes like. ??? why is he getting so close to him, theres no way i get that close to him??? but no one else seems to be picking up on it as weird, so hes having a small crisis like do i REALLY get that close to him???? and now that hes on the outside he notices shuro subtly leaning away and he feels both a wave of shame and..... protectiveness??? (JEALOUSY??????) and he immediately steps in and grabs him like Hey!!! cant you see hes uncomfortable???? weve been through this already!!! and like. ok i cant believe im doing this again but i need to separate this into different endings
a) the whump route: i dont think shuro ever envisioned Actually Telling laios about his frustrations outside of being basically cornered into it. has he ever spoken up against what was expected of him?? has he ever been confrontational???? i think part of what held him back from expressing his frustrations, along with the cultural norms, could be fear of what the reaction would be. if he had done the same in any other aspect of his life (his family, his inheritance), i think he would expect disappointment, disapproval, more proof that he doesnt add up to expectation. to be honest i dont think he Truly believes that laios is the type of person to react like this. but it was strong enough to prevent him from acting and i think would be projected onto his image of laios. maybe fake!laios says something dismissive like Well if it really bothered him hed say something right? what, he cant even stand up for himself? cmon, shuro, prove that you cant handle it just like everything else. and thats pretty much the fastest giveaway that it isnt really laios. of course this would be a HUGE tonal departure from what the actual episode/chapter was, so:
b) the dumbass route: both laioses break into fisticuffs, and, yes.... barking. and so they speedrun the entire encounter as the shapeshifters true form appears and, after laios points out that thinking too hard about others versions of you can tear apart groups and peace of mind, they pointedly do not speak of it again. they think about it though. a LOT
c) the normal route: both laioses argue normal like and the group ends up being able to tell them apart because the fake laios goes on a little too long about how theyre all here for falin and everyones like ok its not like he DOESNT love his sister but.......... the rest of the scenario probably goes like canon, though then i would want to see what everyone Else thought of shuro
#if it had been pre-fight i think shuro must have seen him as someone who wasnt serious enough or was too directionless#it would definitely have been easier to pick him out i think....#i realise that very little actual shipping made it into the scenario. but i hope you see the vision#anon#ask#laishuro tag#if shuro actually ended up having to judge them i cant tell you how accurate he would have been#i DO know that compared to laios he would have been watching their social interactions more carefully#maybe he notices certain habits. i dont know if he would get all of them right though. he definitely gets laios right#long post#huge fucking post even. im so sorry. i hope this answered your question#this is actually shorter than it originally was i took off a paragraph#and.. shorter again because i just revised the final route LMAO#its kinda important that laios is the one that judges so i fixed it. originally i was like well what if shuro judged#which u can kind of tell from the tags above lmao#ok i give up i cant edit this anymore here u go <3
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