#and kill me lol jk

[hyvee]

Wat is wrong with meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee i want friends but im sooo bad at making them and keeping them AND IVE ALWAYS BEEN LIKE THISSSSDS like my track record of being bad at friendship goes back as far as i can remember it’s just who i ammmand I WANNA DIEEEEEE LOLLLL hi

[kikker-oma]

I break my silence once more to reminisc on a memory that haunts me, 8 years later🙃

I was a waitress for 5 years and at one point, a girl from my highschool worked with me. I worked with this girl for a YEAR. I TRAINED her even! Eventually, she left to work somewhere else.

That isn't the issue.

The issue, is that a couple months after she left, she came in with her family to eat (it was a party if like, 20-ish people) and I was the one waiting on them.

At some point during their dinner, she goes "Hey, Oma, do you remember me? " Because I hadn't really acknowledged her as more than a customer.

AND I

LIKE A DUNCE

Think, and respond "oh, didn't we go to highschool together?"

AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I FORGOT WHO SHE WAS AND FORGOT THAT I FREAKING WORKED WITH HER FOR A YEEAAARRR. AFTER GOING TO THE SAME HIGHSCHOOL FOR 4 YEARS?!?!?!

END MEEEEE. ☠️☠️☠️ I STILL THINK ABOUT THIS 8 YEARS LATER AND DIE INSIDE.

I doubt she ever thinks of me, because we were never close to begin with (we got along, just didn't become friends), but man, I hope she wasn't hurt by that😭😭😭

I wish I could remember her name so I could apologize🥴🥴🥴

Why must I be cursed with goldfish memory.

[misteria247]

Okay imagine time since I tormented I mean shared this with some Discord pals teehee.

For this I'm thinking wayy into the future and it's definitely taken on my religion of Pacifica and Fiddleford friendship/mentorship/adopted parent and child because God damnit they deserve the best and it's my blog I do what I want lmao. Okay picture this-

Paz is a bit older. Her and Fiddleford have their father daughter thing. Tate's like an older brother, she's got Dipper (who's she seeing) and Mabel, as her friends. And because she's around people like them, Ford and Stan are essentially like Gruncles to her too. Basically, she's got the whole family thing. One day, her Dipper and Mabel find some tape measuring time machine, and boom Pacifica is sent back to the 80s, where she meets Fidds. But here's the kicker.

It's Fidds pre memory gun.

So he's not completely lost it. Paz unable to really say anything about the future just introduces herself as Paz and vaguely explains how she's stranded in the past. She doesn't say much more on it and Fidds along with Ford agree to help her and it's during this that she sees how her father figure was like. And she sees how happy he was and he's always talking about Tate and he's not weighed down by the horrors of Bill. And it makes Pacifica come to this internal struggle on whether she should warn them about the future or if she should keep quiet about it. Like Paz knows it's risky but she loves these two men and Stan and Dipper and Mabel and Tate and everyone else. She wants them to be happy and not suffer. But also if she does this that means she would possibly lose everything.

She'd lose her dad and brother, she'd lose her boyfriend and her closest friends. She'd lose Ford and Stan which she's begun to see as her own uncles. She'd lose her family if she does this. But Paz can't find any real cons, because she sees herself extendable because of her upbringing. Not realizing that if these people were there they'd fight tooth and nail to stop her because to them she's not worth the risk of possible happiness in the past. And Fidds in all of this he's suspicious of Paz, because she does machinery in a way that only he personally does and he's catching on that this teen might be someone important to him and Ford in the future. Even briefly entertained that she's his and Emma May's second child before shutting it down because she doesn't look anything like them. But everything she does, everything she says, just screams Mcgucket.

Meanwhile, while Paz and Past Fidds are going through a crisis, the present family is desperately trying to get her back. Unaware that their current time they're living could end with just a few short words from Paz. The entire situation is a dire one, especially when a certain triangle is more than willing to do whatever it takes to make his plans happen. And Pacifica is more than willing to do something drastic to protect the family she's somehow gained through the years.

[essektheylyss]

Okay but can FCG actually take a level in gunslinger. If any cleric in this show has the energy to go full "I'm a healer, but— [cocks gun]" it is FCG.

[burningfunobject]

WHERE is ekko???

Why did the caveman show up instead of him

Where has that little RAT scampered off to

[maidomaidomaido]

🌟🌠💖

I did this drawing for my friends birthday aughhh (his birthday isnt today but if I don't post it now I might forget later...)

Also I was trying an old brush I used before (ihateit)

[craqueluring]

lets talk about will's journey through hannibals mind palace in s3a, the myth of theseus, the minotaur, ariadne’s thread, labyrinths, and mazes (there is a tldr at the end of this! and this gets better & more cohesive towards the end i promise lol esp after the uffizi gallery screenshot)

background on theseus: theseus sailed to crete intending to defeat the minotaur, a beast housed by the labyrinth constructed by daedalus. it was constructed so well, daedalus himself could not navigate it. ariadne was the daughter of king minos, who ordered the entrapment of the minotaur. she fell in love with theseus, and,betraying her father and her country, she gave theseus a thread to tie one end at the entrance of the labyrinth, and carry the rest with him, so he could find his way back out. theseus succeeded in killing the minotaur and returned safely.

will graham sails to italy as theseus sailed to crete, and enters the labyrinth of hannibal lecter's mind palace at the norman chapel in palermo, italy. the imagery of the many consecutive doorways and disorienting paths in the catacombs under the chapel is notably labyrinthine, and is actually what made me think of this connection in the first place.

*note the consecutive doorways/arches. this parallels the shot of will and hannibal in front of la primavera. in that shot, there are also many doorways behind them.

hannibal is simultaneously

daedalus, the maker of the labyrinth,

the minotaur, the beast at the center, and,

partly, ariadne, the one who betrays her father and her country, falls in love with theseus and allows him to navigate the labyrinth (i.e. the heart in the norman chapel is what confirms to will that he is going in the right direction). just as ariadne's love of theseus was a betrayal of her country and her father, hannibal's love of will is a betrayal of himself.

perhaps hannibal as daedalus-minotaur-ariadne represents the many contradictory parts of hannibal: the person suit containing the monster (daedalus), the monster (minotaur), and lover (ariadne).

but ariadne, the symbol of love, could also be more accurately represented by both will and hannibal: their connection, and its portrayal through will's hallucinations:

the ravenstag which leads will on the train tracks after chiyoh pushes him off

the blood puddle under the doors to the norman chapel catacombs

the fireflies that lead him to mischa's grave

& more

this thread of connection that leads will through the labyrinth of hannibal's mind is universally present throughout season 3a. it is not the physical actions of a lover that lead will through the labyrinth like ariadne did for theseus, but instead the undertanding derived from love of the labyrinth-maker himself which allows will to navigate the labyrinth. 

if the entrance ("foyer") to hannibal's labyrinthine mind palace is the norman chapel, the center is his home in lithuania, as will's imagined hannibal says while he is in the lithuanian forest in secondo 3x03:

"is this where construction began?" "on my memory palace? its door at the center of my mind. and here you are, feeling for the latch."

perhaps the center of hannibal's memory palace is actually hannibal's home and what happened there. "mazes intended to be more or less impenetrable have a center containing something so valuable or so shameful as to warrant protection" (x pg. 91) — hannibal's labyrinthine mind palace was constructed outward to protect something at his origin, at the center of his mind: mischa.

will's last stop in hannibal's labyrinth, and perhaps the exit, is where he finds hannibal in front of la primavera, once again in italy. the long hall of consecutive doorways in the center of the screen, which mirrors the doorways in the catacombs during will's 'entrance' into hannibal's mind palace, gives a sense of some long journey coming to an end. he tells hannibal "i wanted to understand you before i laid eyes on you again. i needed it to be clear what i was seeing," plainly stating his reason for his journey through the labyrinth — understanding. 

*note the consecutive doorways in the center, which parallel the arches in the aforementioned shot of will entering the catacombs in secondo

as explained by penelope reed doob, the purpose of a labyrinth can be to…

"…to entrap or enlighten errant mazewalkers, denying or controlling access to a center that may contain good or evil, and leaving the maze-walker with higher knowledge or in chaotic limbo" (x pg. 64)

certainly, will's journey through hannibal's labyrinth was, as doob calls it, "the labyrinth as a sign of difficult progress." as a plot device, will's journey through europe, hannibal's labyrinth, the mind palace, was a path designed to lead to will gaining higher knowledge, and the "transcendence of labyrinthine confusion" (x pg. 91) 

right?

but, even after will's journey, we as the audience, will as a character, and even hannibal himself, remain confused, turned around, and unable to see any end in sight, especially after both of their failed attempts at separation.

we are still in the labyrinth. 

"labyrinths, like life, involve chaos and order, destiny and free choice, terror and triumph — all held in balance, all perspective-dependent" (x pg. 252)

church labyrinths as a metaphor for life in particular emphasize a unicursal design, or there being only one true path — that of christ, who can act as a guide for humanity "to discover that the mythically multicursal and unstable labyrinth — of life, of the world, of hell — is in fact unicursal, stable, and extricable" (x pg. 133)

instead of this, nbc's hannibal purposefully emphasizes the multicursal and inextricable nature of life and the world through the use of a seemingly chaotic, and sometimes absurd, plot. there are so, so, so many paths will can (and does) follow in the labyrinth/maze of his life. but none are emphasized as the correct one. because that does not exist. everything becomes a matter of perspective, and even looking at the maze from the outside, one becomes disoriented.

thus, this gives even the viewer a sense that they are wandering through the labyrinth with will.

"The only pattern we are shown is the pattern of the labyrinth...all progress is illusory: we may think we are getting somewhere new, but really we are retreading old patterns, circling and turning and retracing our steps until suddenly we exit right where we entered, with an echoing line or repeated pattern, and not once only but time and again" (x pg. 336)

just as doob says of chaucer's the house of fame, nbc's hannibal as a whole "reconstructs, rather than transcends, the complexity of the many labyrinths in which we live and write — labyrinths we cannot, and perhaps do not even wish to, escape" (x pg 339)

the plot of hannibal has been criticized for being too absurd or chaotic, but the absurdity is the show's essence. it is a tool of emphasis to remind us of the fact that hannibal, will, bedelia, jack, abigail, alana, margot, are — everyone is — making their way through the inferno, wandering through the labyrinth, unable to see the forest for the trees, just as we are. 

"there is no overview of the labyrinth, at least not in this life, and nothing is clear but the uncertainties of the ambiguous maze above whose constraints we cannot rise. believing all this, some men might despair, but…if these be labyrinths, they are enchanting ones, as full of delight as of frustration…nightmarish as it may be, is colorful, energetic, chock-full of magnificent diversity, far more beguiling than cosmic spheres. it cries out for the shaping mind and voice of the poet to give order and perspective where none exists. if that shaping is no more reliable than its material, so be it: perhaps a well-wrought poem in such a world is all the more admirable, and much more fun. the confusions and errors of the maze may be as attractive as the transcendent view. and if truth is always deferred, redefined by another twist, a fresh perspective, a different viewer, so what?" (x pg. 337)

tldr: will's journey through europe, exploring hannibal's memory palace is comparable to theseus' exploration of the labyrinth in search of the minotaur. hannibal is simultaneously daedalus (the labyrinth's creator), his person suit, the minotaur, his monster, and ariadne, a lover who allows theseus to not get lost in the labyrinth. the ravenstag and hannibal and will's psychological connection and deep understanding of e/o could also be compared to ariadne's thread. the center of a labyrinth is commonly something that is protected; hannibal says his home is at the center of his mind — hannibal's mind palace protects mischa at the center. even when will leaves the labyrinth and finds hannibal, there is not much higher knowledge gained from the journey, as would be expected. that is because we are still in the labyrinth, such is life. the absurdity and chaos of the hannibal plot, the repeating themes, plotlines, and endless parallels exacerbate this point, and emphasizes the inextricability of life, and the fact that there is no one correct path in the winding maze of life.

[zhouxiangs]

damn i get it... i really do...

[greenfrogartist]

Batman looking a little red there, isn't he @the-stove-is-divorced ? Must be a trick of the light

[spoonf0rk]

I got a killer headache but that not going to stop me from watching link click

[derpinette]

i have a weird relationship with weight because i hated eating more than anything the moment i was ready for solids ( i hate chewing with my entire life always have & will ) which made me underweight for most of my life ( to this day ) & during late primary-middle school this made me actively suicidal because i felt like something was wrong with my sex because i just was not developing whatsoever prompting me to have a years long phase of trying to gain weight in any way i could ( #EPICFAIL by the way ) & i was already insecure but i felt seriously so unforgivably ugly after bullying not just at school but by adults of my entourage. but then i did in my late 15s which prompted the pendulum to swing in the other direction & suddenly i FREAKED OUT & thought well being skinny is pretty much all i have & know myself to be & clearly it is not going to last forever so i Better preserve it i was delusional about how skinny i thought i was actually i look stumpy & weird i have to prove myself. But now i am normal again kind of

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

ok celebrating lonan’s birthday by painting him!!! I’m soooo harrison frost rn 😽

[theloveinc]

i’d laugh and call him gross lovingly <3 anyways do a haul when u come back 💋

(shoto todoroki is a REAL person confirmed !!) BABE i'm so mad i didn't buy SHIT (and even put back like four things) and it STILL cost $60 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! kms !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

anyway<3 i'm so giddy u asked i love a haul!!! :

(redbull, flavored soda water - i've never tried the dr. cherry vanilla, pickles cuz i've been craving them, conditioner, spray deodorant bc i've been using my moms, redbulls cuz i start work next week, stickers - also for when i start work next week, and POPSICLES cuz we all deserve a treat!)

[sketchyracoon]

Once again back on my sea slug saturday Gajinka's.... on a sunday lol.

[trickstarbrave]

Actually yeah I do want a moon and Star ring

[xcziel]

i am not kidding BLESS those jeans

if someone is somehow reading my blog and sharing last night's critique of the baggy pants vs choreo precision issue i would just like to say you are doing the work of the gods thank you SO much