#and its thirteen! and kutner!

[lokh]

oh shit! its taub!

[thankstothe]

pining hours

[killjoy-prince]

House M.D. but it's when a character says the name of the episode

[botanicallyinclinednerd]

"Why are you still alive?"

"Not sure!"

I liked it better when I first watched these clips not knowing where they were chronologically

[greghatecrimes]

Kutner: What are your adjectives?

13: My... You mean my pronouns?

Kutner: No, I mean your adjectives

13: Uh- I don't know, what're yours?

Kutner: Sunny and chaotic

I imagined Thirteen trying to follow his lead and say "Okay, I guess mine are maybe... confident and driven" or something, but House interrupts to say "Don't listen to that crap. They're awkward and gay." and Kutner bursts out laughing

[fox-mulder-gets-pegged]

Rewatched the episode of House MD where Kutner dies and I honestly think instead of killing his character off, they should have said that Kutner got a job as physician to then President Barack Obama and that's why he was leaving. Objectively funnier since his actor did leave the show to work for Obama and I know it would have driven House nuts that Kutner was ditching to go play doctor with the President instead of getting verbally abused for House's amusement.

[girlypsyop]

House MD was soo real for the way it portrayed women. They're insane. They're all so fucking crazy! They aren't just rational mommy figures for the unstable men around them. God bless.

[deermook]

Mlp house part 1💯

[235uranium]

amber is the "cutthroat" side of house while kutner is his passion

[desire-mona]

house in 2024 bc i see ppl post this

- chase makes "lol americans experience gun violence" jokes

- cameron engages in online discourse and starts a lot of arguments with "as a doctor..."

- foreman uses 4chan but just to sit in shock at the things he sees on there

- house is a mod and frequent poster on r/newjersey of all things. only wilson knows, not because house keeps it a secret, but because its so weirdly out of character that nobody would ever bring it up

- wilson sends reels of edgy standup comedians to house on instagram

- cuddy frequents gentle parenting forums, occasionally uses tactics on house

- taub used to run a food review channel on youtube but stopped when people called his videos "mukbangs"

- thirteen introduces herself with her name and pronouns, everyone makes a joke about this at least once

- kutner is a hamilton fan

[greghatecrimes]

girldad M.D.

house and his three gay daughters solving medical mysteries and commiting malpractice

[all-pacas]

a post about ages that quickly got out of hand

so in house's head 13 says she wasn't born in when a movie came out in 1980, meaning she isn't older than 28 years old. in reality, olivia wilde was 24 at the time, but that's way too young for thirteen: we don't have a Chase Problem, where 13 has had a million subspecialties and needs to be older to account for them, but most people don't actually finish med school until they're 28.

if we assume 13 is doing the normal fellowship thing — that this is her first post after finishing her residency — then she could be 28. that would put her as the same age as kutner (who actually has the opposite problem: kal penn is actually a few years older, but kutner is explicitly 28 when he dies), which kind of fits nicely.

foreman, cameron, park, adams, and taub's ages are never stated. in foreman and taub's cases, we can probably assume they're the same ages as their actors; probably the same for park. adams and cameron, i think, both get the chase/thirteen treatment of being quietly aged up a few years:

omar epps was born in 1973, making foreman 31 in s1, which seems about right for finishing his neurologist training.

chase says he's 30 in s2, making him 29 in s1 (born 1975). (house says he's 26 in s1, which was jesse spencer's age, but the show seems to have realized its mistake, thus the pointed "i am 30" line.)

cameron has a line where she tells a patient the others on the team are older than her. however, jennifer morrison was born in 1979, making her 25 in s1, which is again too young. let's say cameron is 28 in s1, born in 1976. EDIT: Anon pointed out given her training, she really can't be younger than 30 in S1.

for 13 and kutner to be 28 in s4, they both would have been born in 1980/1981.

peter jacobson, and probably taub, was born in 1965, making him 42 in s4.

masters is said to be 29, despite her prodigy status (mostly because she got a few degrees before starting med school).

charlyne li was 26 when they were cast as park. in this case, park doesn't need to be aged up: she's explicitly said to still be a resident when house gets her, so her age works.

adams, however, suffers from extreme Chase Problems: she was 27 when cast, but adams has not only finished medical school and all her training, but also has been working in the prison system for a while. she has to at least be thirty, realistically. i'd honestly put her as a couple years older.

for contrast, wilson starts s1 at 38 years old, cuddy at a wildly implausible but stated 36, and house at 45.

so, just for fun and because this post is rotting my brain, if you lined everyone up in 2004, sometime during the pilot:

HOUSE: 45 WILSON: 38 TAUB: 38 CUDDY: 36 FOREMAN: 31 CHASE: 29 CAMERON: 28 30 KUTNER: 24 THIRTEEN: 24 ADAMS: 22 MASTERS: 22 PARK: 18

[wilsonteav]

My Taub headcanons (also contains Papa Taub headcanons)

• After House's death, he left Plainsboro and returned to being a plastic surgeon. He explained that he respected House very much and that's why he didn't want to work for anyone else.

• He tries to be a better father and person for his daughters. He is afraid that one day they will hate him.

• He brings flowers to Ruby and Rachel for Women's Day even though they are not in relationship.

• Sometimes he goes to Kutner's grave and talks to him and apologizes for not noticing anything.

• He likes sweaters, although he only wears them in the comfort of his home.

• He always tries to be the proudest father of his daughters.

• As he got older, he started wearing glasses.

• Taub got a cat named Lawietee. He named it after Lawrence & Thirteen. Its has mix of black & brown colored fur.

• Taub's favorite way to spend time with daughters is playing board games.

• Taub can play the trumpet, even though he is ashamed of it.

• His musical taste is mix of classical, blues, jazz and pop.

• Chris is not really a halloween liker, but he doesn't stop his daughters from celebrating this day and goes with them to collect the candies.

• Taub loves to play video games on his console in his free time.

[henley-reeves]

"House MD" was the first show that I was absolutely obsessed with 24/7 since I was a kid. I was in love with Huddy, they made me insane like no other ship did before. I remember I rewatching the last 2 episodes of season 5 on a loop all summer until season 6 came out. And I always knew this relationship would end up in tragedy but the way the writers ruined them is just incomprehensible to me. There were so many ways to end it badly but in a well-written way, Its like they didn't even know how to write this ship. They did mutual pining, mutual annoyance-to-lovers so well, and then when it was time to deliver the actual relationship, they lost it after a few episodes and imo, made both characters ooc in so many instances I lost count. The way they ended this relationship made Cuddy look bad, and then they did it with House but made him look even worse in the season finale, that I still hate to this day. And then the show got ruined because an important part of it disappeared. "House" was good because it was an ensemble cast show, it consisted of many elements like puzzle pieces that created the atmosphere, made this show special. And if you take away one element, the whole picture fractures and falls apart. That's why most of the characters that made this show what it was, were present even in recurring roles. That's why when Cameron, Kutner, Thirteen and Amber left the show, it didn't feel the same anymore. And when Cuddy left, the show just lost flavour. And that's why the series finale was not as good as it could be either, because Cuddy was supposed to be there. I don't remember much of what happened after "Bombshells" but didn't House have Cuddy's picture with him in prison where he went AFTER he drove a car through her house? How come she wasn't there in the finale when she was such an important part of his life for decades? A person he wanted to be with so badly that he hallucinated a whole day of romantic relationship with her. Hello?

I read a big review of the series finale by an official online source when it came out, that said the episode was fantastic except there was a huge elephant in the room because Cuddy wasn't there. I haven't thought about this in years, but now I'm rewatching and I'm reminded how badly the show went downhill and it still makes me angry.

Anyway, I miss this show and I think that despite its flaws, it was absolutely amazing overall, but it is a very good example of how the formula of the show only works if you don't mess with it or remove the integral ingredients that made it whole.

And a reminder to writers that "will they or won't they?" only works well when the writers KNOW how to write "they will" in a satisfying way that doesn't make the relationship go off the rails and lose its spark.

[deeplyclosetedjameswilson]

house characters as high school teachers but none of them can teach bio bc thats cheating

house - physics. specifically ap physics, 1+2 and c. has the best pass rate in the state but thirteen tells him it doesnt matter because his class sizes are tiny (his reputation scares lots of students off). doesn't grade a damn thing, hasn't lesson planned since dinosaurs roamed the earth. department head but really cameron is doing his job

foreman - calculus and geometry. taking ap calc concurrently with dr houses ap physics c is not for the faint of heart. actually a really good teacher. grades harshly but also gives really good feedback. almost impossible to earn an A in his class unless you really understand the material, but he's always available for extra help. kind of dry so hes unpopular with the younger kids. math department head

chase - gym teacher. his first year of teaching the kids screenshotted his instragram pfp and put it up on posters around the school.

cameron - i know i said no bio but cameron is the freshman bio teacher that all the students adore. definitely has kids eating lunch in her classroom. does all of house's department head paperwork. not as good as giving feedback as foreman but she is better about giving chances to go back and retake tests, make up assignments etc. runs the national honor society

wilson - exclusively teaches english class for seniors. literally impossible to fail his class because you just start crying during extra help and he passes you. big on watching movies in class but will assign one of those worksheet to follow along with. its ok if you dont do it because again, you can sniffle and he will give you a 65. if the school can't find a theatre teacher for the year he's an ok backup but insists on doing the classics. have you ever seen high schoolers perform the works of henrik ibsen? english department head

kutner - english teacher, sophomores and juniors. really big on creative writing. class is extremely disorganized, so you're not always sure what you're supposed to be learning but you're having a good time so it doesn't matter. if he thought ahead enough to make his students hold on to all their work they'd have an amazing portfolio but unfortunately he accidentally threw out all your essays from december (he tells you this in april). they were great though. helps run all the extremely nerdy clubs.

thirteen - another math teacher. kind of like foreman she teaches both upper level kids, but in statistics, and the lower level kids in algebra 1. really good at explaining concepts in ways you wouldn't have thought of. dry sense of humor but the kids love it. students have many theories as to why she's called thirteen (that was the average grade on her final, she fails 13 kids a year, her classroom is haunted and she's the 13th teacher to use it) but its because she was house's 13th student teacher (and the 2nd to actually make it into education despite house's best efforts to convince her otherwise)

taub - career change into teaching. combo sociology and psychology teacher. his class isn't the most interesting, but he's a decent teacher. occasional pop quiz and presentation but otherwise he shows off his powerpoint every day and makes you take a quiz on friday. loves to show a movie in class but unlike wilson he does expect you to turn in the worksheet, cmon its literally 5 questions suck it up. coaches golf

cuddy - the principal. she would like a liquor store gift card for an end of year gift please

[greghatecrimes]

Home - House M.D.

A little tribute to the show and characters that have brought me a lot of happiness this summer and that feel a little bit like home.

(dialogue subtitles available on youtube!)