#and it's still FUNNY

[arosnowflake]

I love posts about writing on this site bc so many of them are made in snappish anger so you get completely insane takes like 'characters being relatable is bad' bc the author was pissed at yet another story being ruined by its insistance on flattening an interesting, complex character in pursuit of 'relatability', and you understand and agree that this is an increasingly common problem in mass media that you too are frustrated by. And yet 'characters being relatable is bad' is still an insane take that makes no sense whatsoever.

[kimbapisnotsushi]

i should. change my header probably

[sxnzi-nyja]

Okay, it's been a while, but I've been reminded about this situation

So, it's Nearl the Radiant Knight's rate up, I was going for one copy of Corroserum, nothing more. I'm doing pulls and pulls and not a single snek boy. Before even hitting 75 pulls I got Flametail twice and limited Nearl, without a single Corroserum in sight.

Eventually I hit the 75 pulls mark, so at this point I just bought him from the shop

Guess what happens the next day when I do the free single pull

.

.

.

Motherfucker decides to finally show up, after 75 pulls of nothing, now of all the times he decided to show up

So yeah, just wanted to share that story cuz it still makes me laugh a bit, stoopid snek, luv u ❤️

[moodsandtenses]

There's something hilarious about how so much subsequent media has positioned Vampires and Werewolves as, like, binary opposite entities, and then you read Dracula (1897) and realize that wolves are that guy's preferred solution to every problem. You'd say something to Dracula about "ah yes, werewolves, vampires' great eternal enemies," and he'd just be like "you mean my subcontractors?"

[pirateprincessjess]

When I was a kid my family pretended to get raptured so I would think I was left behind on earth while they all went to heaven.

I was like 8 years old and my sister and mom had gotten really into the Left Behind novels (bible fan fic about the rapture). In the books when the rapture happened the clothes that people were wearing when they got raptured were left behind in neatly folded piles.

One day when I was getting home from school my family decided that they would leave piles of neatly folded clothes around the house, and then hide in the basement.

The intended effect was that I would get home and see the clothes then, think that my family had been raptured and that I wasn’t good enough to get into heaven… or something?

The problem was that I had never read these books, and didn’t really think about the rapture very often. There was no reason that I would see some laundry on the floor and think “The rapture happened and I’ve been abandoned by God! I’ll never see my family again!! Oh nooo!!!!”

I just sat down and watched cartoons and eventually my family got bored and revealed that they were all hiding in the basement.

It’s a good thing I didn’t understand the joke, otherwise that shit would have been traumatic.

[steveharrington]

redownloaded instagram and got sucked into reels and it’s truly like an alternate reality happening over there. video of a girl being like “looking back on my cringe 2021 taste….” and it’s a pic of her wearing like. jeans and a top. the top has a checkerboard pattern. she’s like screaming in agony. the comments are all like “omg not the microtrend 😭 i can’t believe i ever wore that” like woah. i think you guys are crazy

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

License to Kitty.

[sunnyirry]

"Oh, and there's kabru too!!!"

[clownsuu]

God I love the insane amounts of d r i p Stanley just casually wears

[abisalli]

I bet wearing spandex in summer is no fun

Bonus: summer suits!?

[professionalowl]

so. um. the good news is we found your boyfriend. the bad news is that, well, we sort of…dug him up…in the middle of a car park. in leicester (buckley et al. 2013). leicester, yeah. sorry. they demolished the friary he was hastily interred in when henry viii dissolved all the monasteries. you know how it is. and as it turns out, well, shakespeare was…sort of right about him. scoliosis, yeah, sorry (appleby et al. 2014). if it makes you feel any better we analysed his bones and it turns out he had a pretty high-protein diet before he died (lamb et al. 2014). and he drank so much wine that it changed their chemical composition, which we didn't know could actually happen before we analysed him (lamb et al. 2014), so he was having a good time, at least. 

BIBLIOGRAPHY

Appleby, J., Mitchell, P.D., Robinson, C., Brough, A., Rutty, G., and Morgan, B. (2014). The scoliosis of Richard III, last Plantagenet King of England: diagnosis and clinical significance. Lancet 383, 1944. 

Buckley, R., Morris, M., Appleby, J., King, T., O’Sullivan, D., and Foxhall, L. (2013). ‘The king in the car park’: new light on the death and burial of Richard III in the Grey Friars church, Leicester, in 1485. Antiquity 87, pp. 519-538. 

Lamb, A.L., Evans, J.E., Buckley, R., and Appleby, J. (2014). Multi-isotope analysis demonstrates significant lifestyle changes in King Richard III. Journal of Archaeological Science 50, pp. 559-565.

[midydoof]

This was my request fill for the One Piece Fanwork Exchange back in April that I posted on AO3. The zosan prompt was "two pining idiots"

I've been debating for months whether to post it on tumblr since long vertical comics often don't look good in the thumbnails, still not sure I'm too happy with that bit.

[cassmouse]

S2S1 of Upright watched and I wasn't fucking wrong about the plot being dodgy but the writing still being good lmao

Will return for more in depth thoughts after another episode because I feel like yknow... Considering how perfect and very very standalone the first season was maybe that first episode was just the awkward meandering to an unexpected season two who knows?? I am giving the plot time to sort itself out lmao

[dapper-lil-arts]

I have bad news. Rainbow Dash has become gay due to woke. Reblog to pray

[artkaninchenbau]

Crocodile finds a strange stray cat an 11-year old Nico Robin (AU where they met 13 years earlier. Robin's been on the run from the World Government for 3 years. Crocodile's 27 and has not set up base in Alabasta yet)

It seems like I have become possessed. By some sort of demon.

Bonus:

[foldingfittedsheets]

When I was learning German my teacher pulled me aside to ask which of my parents spoke German. I was confused and said neither. Then belatedly I remembered that my dad did speak very rudimentary German after being stationed in Heidelberg for a few years.

This teacher was well loved but very strict, being questioned by her was always a little intimidating. I didn’t know why she was asking.

She pressed to ask if he spoke it with me and I laughed nervously and said no I asked him not to speak it because he couldn’t even conjugate verbs.

Apparently my accent was so good that she assumed I’d had more than one year of practice. The problem was my vocabulary. Ironically I needed her to translate the word for accent as I was unfamiliar with it. I was a decent student but some words tripped me up.

One day she conducted an oral exam and asked us to talk about the hospital. We could say whatever we wanted. In the middle of my nervous little monologue about how we go to the hospital when we are sick and the doctors and nurses help us she suddenly burst out laughing.

I had never seen her laugh before, at least not more than a sensible chuckle. But here she was, bent over her stomach cracking up leaving me baffled as to how talking about the nurses could possibly have inspired this extreme hilarity.

The word I was trying to use for nurse was “Pfleger” but I’d said “Fluger”. (Possibly fliegen? It’s been a long time) What I said was close to fly, and the teacher was imagining flying nurses drifting along the hospital wing.

She apologized and tried to compose herself but she admitted that hearing my extremely competent accent saying absolute nonsense was the highlight of her week.