#and it's about the same length
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how i feel about all the changes in s3
#listen i understand complaints and feeling disappointed but y’all gotta remember there’s always the og campaign#there were questionable choices definetly but being negative about it on the internet just does disservice to all the good stuff#it ain’t perfect i miss the group kill but i’m honestly blaming steaming’s whole ‘every season must be the same length’ model#like this season really could’ve used an extra 3 episodes but alas! they made it as solid as possible for tv in that time!#tlovm#critical role#the legend of vox machina#tlovm season 3#also kiki resurrecting percy near and dear to my heart but also the vax percy bond and getting to see more of percy’s torment mmmm#also the cr cast are clearly having fun with it so its not like some foreign entity is committing sacrilege when they change stuff!
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the thing is there's like, a point of oversaturation for everything, and it's why so many things get dropped after a few minutes. and we act like millennials or gen z kids "have short attention spans" but... that's not quite it. it's more like - we did like it. you just ruined it.
capitalism sees product A having moderate success, and then everything has to come out with their "own version" of product A (which is often exactly the same). and they dump extreme amounts of money and environmental waste into each horrible simulacrum they trot out each season.
now it's not just tiktokkers making videos; it's that instagram and even fucking tumblr both think you want live feeds and video-first programming. and it helps them, because videos are easier to sneak native ads into. the books coming out all have to have 78 buzzwords in them for SEO, or otherwise they don't get published. they are making a live-action remake of moana. i haven't googled it, but there's probably another marvel or starwars something coming out, no matter when you're reading this post.
and we are like "hi, this clone of project A completely misses the point of the original. it is soulless and colorless and miserable." and the company nods and says "yes totally. here is a different clone, but special." and we look at clone 2 and we say "nope, this one is still flat and bad, y'all" and they're like "no, totally, we hear you," and then they make another clone but this time it's, like, a joyless prequel. and by the time they've successfully rolled out "clone 89", the market is incredibly oversaturated, and the consumer is blamed because the company isn't turning a profit.
and like - take even something digital like the tumblr "live streaming" function i just mentioned. that has to take up server space and some amount of carbon footprint; just so this brokenass blue hellsite can roll out a feature that literally none of its userbase actually wants. the thing that's the kicker here: even something that doesn't have a physical production plant still impacts the environment.
and it all just feels like it's rolling out of control because like, you watch companies pour hundreds of thousands of dollars into a remake of a remake of something nobody wants anymore and you're like, not able to afford eggs anymore. and you tell the company that really what you want is a good story about survival and they say "okay so you mean a YA white protagonist has some kind of 'spicy' love triangle" and you're like - hey man i think you're misunderstanding the point of storytelling but they've already printed 76 versions of "city of blood and magic" and "queen of diamond rule" and spent literally millions of dollars on the movie "Candy Crush Killer: Coming to Eat You".
it's like being stuck in a room with a clown that keeps telling the same joke over and over but it's worse every time. and that would be fine but he keeps fucking charging you 6.99. and you keep being like "no, i know it made me laugh the first time, but that's because it was different and new" and the clown is just aggressively sitting there saying "well! plenty of people like my jokes! the reason you're bored of this is because maybe there's something wrong with you!"
#this was much longer i had to cut it down for legibility#but i do want to say i am aware this post doesnt touch on human rights violations as a result of fast fashion#that is because it deserves its own post with a completely different tone#i am an environmental educator#so that's what i know the most about. it wouldn't be appropriate of me to mention off-hand the real and legitimate suffering#that people are going through#without doing my research and providing real ways to help#this is a vent post about a thing i'm watching happen; not a call to action. it would be INCREDIBLY demeaning#to all those affected by the fast fashion industry to pretend that a post like this could speak to their suffering#unfortunately one of the horrible things about latestage capitalism as an activist is that SO many things are linked to this#and i WANT to talk about all of them but it would be a book in its own right. in fact there ARE books about each level of this#and i encourage you to seek them out and read them!!! i am not an expert on that i am just a person on tumblr doing my favorite activity#(complaining)#and it's like - this is the individual versus the industry problem again right because im blaming myself#for being an expert on environmental disaster (which is fucking important) but not knowing EVERYTHING about fast fashion#i'm blaming myself for not covering the many layers of this incredibly complicated problem im pointing out#rather than being like. yeah so actually the fault here lies with the billion dollar industries actually.#my failure to be able to condense an incredibly immense problem that is BOOK-LENGTH into a single text post that i post for free#is not in ANY fucking way the same amount of harm as. you know. the ACTUAL COMPANIES doing this ACTUAL THING for ACTUAL MONEY.#anyway im gonna go donate money while i'm thinking about it. maybe you can too. we can both just agree - well i fuckin tried didn't i#which is more than their CEOs can say
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Mostly Hiring manager, but HR manager and PR manager too
#elden ring#elden ring varre#white mask varre#varre#white faced varre#tarnished#tarnished oc#varre x tarnished#tw; blood#suggestive#no jokes or humor this time sorry#just Varre being Varre#I know I usually stick to humor stuff but this clawed through my brain like an eldritch horror#I actually hate 5/11 Varre faces I drew here but I did my best#sometimes homeboy is gonna look like a lil gremlin and there’s nothing I can do about it#but also those other 6 /11 faces are the best I’ve ever done so I’ll take it#never been more clear to me how I unconsciously push myself to do harder things#like we got crazy hand angles with defined knuckles and fingernails#we got the upward angle face that doesn’t look like shit#we got form fitting lighting that is passable#semi accurate fabric physics#did I not give a fuck about the BG#yes#but I’m here for Varre sex appeal not rendering bricks#also misericorde magically changes scale throughout the whole comic#lmao oops#most detailed environmental lighting I’ve done too#Christ the lengths I go to for deranged fictional men#at the very least I feel like the dialogue isn’t ooc#me fighting for my life to make sure Varre looks like the same damn character between each panel
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I don’t like getting intense over petty things, but why are people calling large paragraphs “bad formatting” now. It’s just formatting. Sometimes, a larger paragraph serves its text well, and sometimes it doesn’t, and there is a LOT more that goes into making a text block readable than length alone.
Please please please fucking please stop inventing all-encompassing arbitrary rules about what features define “good” art and “bad” art.
#writeblr#i mean this lovingly and politely#flow of paragraphs is important to me!#if most of your paragraphs are three-to-one sentences that’s not necessarily a bad thing BUT#it does keep you from pulling off some real OOMPH stuff#for example;#large paragraphs to convey one-track racing thoughts#the absolute hit of a one-sentence wham line after a longer introspection#PARAGRAPH VARIETY#look variety in paragraph length ALSO helps people keep track of where they are in a text#in the same way that breaking up *too* large paragraphs can help!#babes i mean this very gently; if you struggle with large paragraphs then you may need to work on your attention span a little#(and that is not an indictment against you as a person)#also i struggle with continuous short paragraphs! It breaks up my reading experience & increases scroll time (sometimes for no reason)#much in the same way that overly large spaces between paragraphs makes me struggle#accessible text formatting is a nuanced topic#i’m sorry we just have so many feelings about this#related topics and actions are allowed to be kept in the same paragraphs for flow reasons okay??? okay
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ended up taking 2 months to finish but they're finally done! the roving is divine dyeworks oceana, 6oz of merino chain-plied to about 550 yards of light sport/heavy fingering. the streaks of green and purple ended up much less pronounced in the final yarn but honestly i'm fine with it; i like the more subtle heathered look.
#hand spinning#hand spun yarn#i've already told myself i'm gonna use the next one to practice normal plying but i really do not want to. chain-plying is so much easier#the singles get way less tangled. there's no stress about whether they're all the same length. you just spin one and go!#-- admittedly there are bumps at the crossover points but honestly after soaking they've all but disappeared anyway so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#subcreation#aggressive linguistic prescriptivism
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time for my big lumax rantpost. I used to be way more of a shipper but upon reexamining some of my GA-era assumptions, I'm here to tell you why it sucks, and why I don't look forward to lumax endgame if it's the same lumax we've been getting.
lumax has fantastic potential, but needs lots of work to actually become the ship most of the fandom thinks it is.
I get the sense most on here consider lumax ST's darling perfect ship which is sullied by weak and/or racist writing. while I wouldn't argue at all that the writing does right by Lucas, I do think it's important to recognize lumax as an intentionally-written badly flawed relationship, NOT a poorly-written perfect relationship. (the writing for 5 has a lot to prove so we'll see)
lumax is obviously happening. no ending to Lucas's story makes sense other than him getting the girl. however, I don't like that from either character's standpoint.
from hers - Max is not a prize. and from his - Max is no prize.
Max is a pretty shitty girlfriend.
we've never seen her show Lucas any interest in learning anything about him. I can't remember a time she's complimented him, said anything nice about him, or done anything purely for his benefit. virtually all of their serious conversations have been about her, and the scant few that are sort of about him are inevitably just a lead-in to him offering support to her.
Lucas and Max's relationship - pre, during, and post dating - is 100% about what he can do for her. he's the one making 100% of the effort.
it seems like most of their interactions are him walking on eggshells trying to placate, reassure, or convince her, all for the reward of.... what. being allowed to continue existing near her? like yeah, she's a cool girl, but. that can't be it.
what good is getting the girl if the girl doesn't really offer anything?
. . .
through the seasons, semiquickly:
season 2
Lucas and Dustin both like Max, so they invite her trick or treating, offering to protect her from bullies and show her where the good candy is. in other words, the first Max / Lucas interaction is him offering something to benefit her. Max returns no appreciation or even response to the invite, yet still shows up to reap the benefits.
that pretty much sets the tone.
Max wants to be included, but that's a sensitive subject, so she puts on aloof airs to protect herself. it's an act, but nonetheless it's all Lucas receives.
the facade slips on multiple occasions though; Lucas is permitted to see her vulnerability, and we can see she's actually more desperate to make the connection than he is.
Dustin seeks Steve's manipulation tactics to use on Max, but Lucas wins her over by treating her like an equal and offering her genuine friendship.
he risks both his place in the party and his safety/life to include her, gives his undivided attention when she talks to him, asks questions that show his interest and concern, he reassures, uplifts and compliments her, and physically protects her.
in return, Max. uhh. well she does apologize for being a jerk, although she doesn't exactly stop, lmao. this is one of only two moments I can think of when Max reveals any regard for what Lucas thinks of her.
lumax is off-balance before it even starts, although s2 is when I think that dynamic is most permissible. since Max is a newcomer, Lucas has the advantage in many respects, and it makes sense for him to be the one extending a hand to her.
when Billy attacks Lucas for hanging out with Max, he could be gravely hurt if not for Steve taking the beating instead. Max joins in the momentary group hug but never says a word about this. (I suspect the writers mean for Max's bus apology to have proactively served as a veiled "sorry my stepbro is racist" but more felt needed in that moment.)
then they go to the dance and she kisses him and it's cute and everything is happy for ten whole seconds.
between 2 and 3
even though the summer of '85 is "the good days," this relationship is already careening downhill.
we learn that Max has dumped Lucas five times - such a regular occurrence that he takes it in stride and is well practiced at winning her back as a result.
unfortunately it's Lucas taking to heart the "happy wife happy life" policy from his dad that's set up lumax as something that seems to serve only Max. her awareness of the policy means she holds all the cards.
season 3
Max has secured her place in the party and the relationship, and now it's time for her to bring something to the table, but I honestly can't name one thing. it's still Lucas bending over backwards and Max sometimes being a bit of a jerk. (another act. we'll come back to this)
from the start of 3 we see an excessively secure Max and an obsequious Lucas. she doesn't show him any of the vulnerability that made her endearing in 2. they share fun moments, but we can infer that she doesn't treat him very well in ways that matter.
at one point she even plays mad just to watch him panic. you get the feeling this boy can never feel secure in his relationship. yeah she's just teasing, but do you think Lucas is allowed to tease too?
when El comes to Max for advice, she tells her that "boyfriends lie all the time" and this is before we see Lucas lie to her.
when Mike comes to Lucas for advice, he confidently schools him on how to get back in El's good graces by buying her a present - making clear he's been following his dad's advice all summer long and it's been working:
L: Dad? When Mom's mad at you, how do you make her not mad? C: First, I apologize. Then, I get your mother whatever she wants. L: Even when she's wrong? C: She's never wrong, son.
the mall confrontation is the first time we see Lucas really lie to Max, but even then, the girls don't actually have proof Nana isn't sick.
it's telling, actually, that Lucas's loyalty goes to Mike instead of Max in this moment. in s2 it was the other way around (Lucas pissed off the whole party by including her in the group and telling her the truth - a technically banishable offense). but now he's back to his s1 bros before hoes policy, and not only backs up but expands on Mike's lie. after dating almost a year, his loyalty to Max should be even stronger, but here we see the opposite. if Max had been at least as good a friend to him as Mike, I'm inclined to think he would at least have tried to be noncommittal here.
Max is so confident Lucas will have nothing on his mind but winning her back, as always - meanwhile who we actually see Lucas apologizing to is Will.
she may have had Lucas wrapped around her little finger all summer, but we're seeing that start to uncoil. if Lucas apologizes, it's offscreen.
when Billy tries to break out of the sauna to kill Max, Lucas slingshots him and body shields Max during the fight. next thing you know, Max is back to being cliquey with El in the bathroom (making fun of Mike even though he was the only one who did anything to save El's life?? girl you're being shitty to boyfriends that aren't even yours)
they seem to be a couple again by the end of 3, but the relationship is weakened...
between 3 and 4
..which sets the scene for how the two apparently drift when Max ends it once again. she's not playing this time - she uses the term "break up" instead of "dump" and Lucas has accepted that it's over.
depression makes it hard for Max to connect with him, but the way she treated him in 3 has likely also eaten away at his insistence on prioritizing her. if you push someone away over and over you can't be too surprised if they stay further away each time.
so Max withdraws socially and Lucas apparently doesn't go to his usual lengths to pursue her.
he's still making effort though! the "stalking" comment makes it clear he's been trying to approach her. we know he's been inviting her to his basketball games. him already knowing her favorite song as of 4x4 is more evidence of him taking an interest in her between seasons.
he clearly still cares a lot about Max, but good for him for pursuing his own hobbies and friendships as well.
season 4
Lucas finally asks Max to do something to support him for once (come to his game), but she shuts it down hard.
we know Max still cares about him, but that's just it - WE know. he doesn't. to his face, it's bristling rejection even while he literally begs for the chance to support her.
saving Max's life is a group effort, but Lucas knowing her favorite song is the key that saves her life, and it's only after that that she's friendly towards him again.
the only time I can recall Max expressing any concern for Lucas's wellbeing is when she asks if he's okay in 4x6 - and he only gets a few sentences to process Patrick's death before it's time for him to turn it into an apology to her. sigh.
Lucas is the only one of Max's friends to voice any objection to her suicide mission of a Vecna plan, and pitches for them to gamble a stranger's life instead. he once again risks his life to hang out in the Creel house with Max, personally taking on the huge responsibility of making sure she doesn't die.
Vol 2 Max finally shows Lucas some long-awaited appreciation ("you might have been there" and "I'm glad you're here") which is very nice to see.
I'm conflicted about the movie invite scene, but we'll talk about that later. textually: he asks her out, she accepts, it's totes adorbs.
unfortunately, Max being tranced out by the time Jason walks in means it's time for Lucas once again to get attacked by an older, stronger guy who's wrongly convinced he's a danger to her. (again not her fault, but kinda because of her)
everything goes sideways, Max gets Vecna'd, and Lucas holds her while she dies. we end on a bruised Lucas sitting loyally at Max's bedside, reading to her just in case she can hear it inside her coma.
Lucas hasn't been perfect but he has spent yet another season physically protecting and emotionally supporting Max at great personal expense, and with little appreciation and no support in return.
. . .
the movie doodle didn't fix lumax
Max has had an epiphany, but a change of behavior has scarcely begun. being nice isn't the same as making amends. they've resolved zero of the old issues, plus 4 (even if the plan had worked) has heaped a ton of new shit on both of them.
she's still a grieving, neglected, depressed and passively suicidal child of a triply-broken home. dating doesn't fix that. they already broke up once under the same conditions.
plus Max has new catastrophic emotional traumas, some of which which explicitly exacerbate those very issues. she has catastrophic injuries and disability to cope with (and this is a girl who withdraws under stress normally). with a shred of realism, she's waking up in less a mood for dating than ever.
Lucas has also taken on new traumas, between the basketball team stuff, getting beaten up and almost shot/strangled, and watching Max get Vecna'd and die. he already has a history of guilt about not being there for her enough, so he's going to have a lot more about failing her in that moment (definitely not his fault but he'll still feel bad) and will likely be even more focused on her.
to me, this all sounds like a recipe for the same old dynamic except worse than ever. if they get sleeping beauty'd directly back into lumax, it'll be a disservice to both characters.
. . .
now let's talk about why Max treats Lucas the way she does 🔬
she's not a conniving bitch, she's just a scared kid from a toxic home. that doesn't excuse her behavior but it does make it understandable.
Max CAN be a great friend. she's just not to Lucas.
Max absolutely showers El with the good qualities she'll barely show Lucas. in fact I could loosely say Max is to El what Lucas is to Max.
Max is suspicious and disparaging towards Lucas, even while trusting that he can be counted upon to grovel. meanwhile El never apologizes for intentionally hurting Max both physically and emotionally, yet the moment El acknowledges her (only because she wants help), Max is instantly forgiving, kind, gentle, caring, generous and supportive towards her.
she throws her loyalty behind a friend of 1 afternoon over her boyfriend of a year who's been the only person in Hawkins to show her any true kindness and emotional connection.
if Max was half the friend to Lucas that she is to El, she'd be a decent girlfriend. why isn't she?
we can name a few reasons why Max IS so nice to El, but why she ISN'T to Lucas is a separate question. kindness isn't zero-sum.
she told us why. boyfriends lie.
and it's ANY boyfriend, not just hers. Nana's sick? more like Mike's a lying piece of shit! Suzie from camp? fake! Dustin's obviously lying! the only one of the boys Max has never accused of lying is Will - the only one who's been single the whole time.
just. the state of being a boyfriend (or even just liking a girl is close enough), makes any boy automatically a liar.
Max believes "friend" and "boyfriend" are mutually exclusive
"Friends don't lie!" "Yeah, well, boyfriends lie all the time." <- it's all right there.
back in 2 when Lucas was her friend, she was more open and trusting. she gave him the benefit of the doubt that monsters were real and he knew a girl with magic powers. starting to date flipped the switch, and now she doesn't trust him about mundane stuff.
now they're not friends, they're boyfriend/girlfriend, and she expects to be treated in a whole different way, including all the baggage that comes with romantic relationships in her mind.
what baggage?
Max's childhood is full of examples of awful, manipulative men and abusive, broken relationships.
her dad: I'd only be speculating about why her parents' marriage failed, but in 2 Max misses California because her dad is still there, then by 4 acts like it's doubtful he can even be tracked down for delivery of what's basically her suicide letter. it's clear she desired a relationship with her dad but was abandoned. Neil: abusive asshole who rules the household with an iron fist. I'd be shocked if he hasn't abused Susan, and see little reason he wouldn't do it in front of Max (after all, we see him verbally and physically abuse his first wife in front of his son, in a bad fight over suspected lies/infidelity). in his grief over Billy, Neil and Susan have "bad fights" and he leaves the family. he's not missed, but it's still a second abandonment by a father figure. Billy: Max's peer example of guys in relationships: a sleazy, two-faced asshole who treats girls like trash and completely changes his persona to manipulate them for sex or whatever else he wants (Max appears to be all too aware of his sex life and is disgusted). abandonment issues with him too: a good relationship with a big brother would've meant the world to her, but he rejected and probably abused her for years; her letter at his grave reads "ever since you left" - same word she used for Neil.
Max desperately hopes Lucas is an exception to the rule, but these are the behaviors she would naturally fear from any guy she dates.
Max is especially terrified of being abandoned (and that she deserves it)
to be abandoned over and over can naturally leave a kid wondering if it's their fault, if this is the treatment they deserve.
Lucas is overall quite honest, and there's not an abusive bone in his body. the most realistic one of Max's fears to apply to him is that someday he'll leave her, too.
and that's the worst fear Vecna chooses to voice in Lucas's form: realizing he's been wrong about her, that she's fundamentally bad and he's glad she's going to be killed. a gutting abandonment from the guy she most wants to trust.
Vecna-Susan also tells Max that she deserves what's going to happen to her, that she's "broken everything" and that her letters can't make things right. because he's in full Vecna mode when he says it, I just took those as very general condemnations at first. but they hurt even worse when I remember they're still coming from "Susan" - revealing that Max feels she has broken her family.
she wanted Billy to die, and she figures Neil left because Billy died, so that's two of the abandonments being "her fault". if that's true, Max would also feel responsible for destroying her mom's life - having cost her her marriage, home, and financial security.
in her addictions Susans has, in an emotional sense, abandoned Max just like all her other family members - and Max fears she deserves it. how desperate she was for this hug... :(
anyway, back to lumax: let's reexamine those s3 dumpings
what exactly did Lucas even do? we never find out.
on first watch, I took "boyfriends lie" at face value and assumed Lucas got caught fibbing. but that doesn't fit so well.
he's maybe the party member most invested in "friends don't lie". honesty to his friends is a pillar of his character. again, he caused friction in 2 because he so strongly prioritized honesty to Max. to assume based on one line from an unreliable narrator that he randomly became a huge liar over the summer is unfair.
via their counseling of Mike and El, Lucas and Max tell us what's been going on with lumax
Max tells El:
He'll come crawling back to you in no time, begging for forgiveness. I guarantee him and Lucas are totally wallowing in self-pity and misery right now like "ohh, I hope they take us back!"
I think we all clocked that one: Max thinks that because El followed her technique, Mike will come crawling back - because Lucas has come crawling back to her several times now.
but I haven't seen much discussion about how the spying scene (which "he'll come crawling back" is paired with) shows Lucas assuring Mike that he's been dumped for an unfair and illogical reason because that's what Max has done to him several times now.
M: I just don't understand what I did to deserve this. L: Nothing. Nothing. That's my whole point. You are the victim here. Stop asking rational questions. M: I know, I know, you're right. Because women act on emotion and not logic. L: Precisely. It's a totally different species.
Max is pissed. but has she been irrational, acting on emotion and not logic, and dumping him for no apparent reason all summer? signs point to yes.
and I understand Lucas saying this. it's not pure misogyny out of nowhere; he's been told that his mother expects gifts and apologies even when wrong, Max acts that way too, and now so apparently does El. all of his examples concur that this is just how women in relationships are. (Charles Sinclair how many relationships will your advice destroy lmao)
both Max and Lucas are bringing preconceptions from home.
Max acts this way on purpose
I don't think she's dumped him over truly nothing (although that's how it looks to him). I'm thinking she blows real, minor missteps out of proportion.
any time Lucas does something slightly insensitive, it looks like the first red flag to her, and instead of communicating in a constructive way, she just throws up this "boys aint shit" force field and dumps him. of course she doesn't truly want to be rid of him, she's just sorta snapping the leash.
I think Max knows what she's doing. I think she wants to keep Lucas always on his back foot, because the relationship isn't as scary if she feels like she holds all the power.
she's always trying to cover up fear/sorrow with anger, because anger gives an illusion of control. and she's been conscious of that anger, and the fact that it's unfair to Lucas, since the beginning - that's what she apologized for on the bus. "I guess I'm angry too, and I'm sorry."
she was mature enough at 13 to see the error in her behavior, but still not mature enough by 15 to fix it. every season has just been a slightly different flavor of "leave before you get left".
so, that's my take on Max's relationship behavior. but again, explanations aren't excuses. Lucas deserves to be treated well, and that's not happening.
what needs to happen?
simply maturing more will help them both a lot. being 15 is a terrible condition in of itself.
I don't see Lucas dumping Max's ass, but she should take her own advice before the relationship continues: explain herself and fix the garbage parts of her behavior.
before Max can be the girlfriend Lucas deserves, she needs a substantial period of physical and emotional healing.
she needs renewed connections with her friends and family, and a lot of general growth in the area of communication and processing her feelings.
in regards to Lucas, she needs to work on her trust issues, and learn to extend him the treatment warranted by his behavior, not the behavior she fears from others. she needs to learn that "friend" and "girlfriend" aren't mutually exclusive, that real friendship is the key to their relationship, and is a two-way street.
any Billy racism/assault acknowledgement would be better years late than never, especially if grieving Billy continues to be a focus in front of Lucas.
Lucas could also use a little work
the relentless positivity doesn't serve Max well. often it turns out to be empty reassurances which make her feel let down (so, a soft version of the lies she fears). she let him know in 4x4 that this hurts her, but he kept doing it for the rest of the season.
but the big one is that "happy wife happy life" doesn't serve him well, and rewarding unfair treatment perpetuates the problem. yes, the ability to compromise, swallow pride, and be the bigger person are healthy parts of a relationship, as well as the willingness to extend grace to your partner/friend when they're struggling. but it always being on one designated person is a recipe for dissatisfaction and resentment.
Lucas should voice to Max that he, too, has struggles and needs support. I'd like to see him pursue outside interests unapologetically.
no, this isn't an exhaustive list, and I don't expect to see everything fixed at once, or explicitly processed onscreen. but I sure hope we get some evidence of change, and that this has all been part of an arc.
for instance, I'd love for the final lumax reconciliation to be Max asking Lucas to take her back.
I kind of hope not to see them officially together until the very end. in fact I'd so much rather see ST end on a good Max / Lucas friendship with an implied romantic future than jump back to the status quo.
l don't want to see lumax until it's a new lumax, based on real, reciprocal friendship.
#even with the length I rambled this is still oversimplified and left out stuff re: both. but. just to get the conversation started.#you don't want elm*x because lucas. I don't want lumax because lucas. we are not the same#I think people fawn over lumax because they're kind of a milkvan foil and therefore must be perfect?#lowkey seeing lucas date someone else for a bit would straighten 4 max out. girlie careful acting like you're the only fish in the sea <3#the more I think about it the more I'd like lumax to completely break up and live in different towns and then try again as adults#if the max waking up scene has a kiss in it I'm turning off the tv#lucas sinclair#max mayfield#lumax#givehimthemedicine analysis
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my personal headcanon is the vees were unremarkable nobodies when they were alive. i just love it as a thematic throughline for them. they love to let the public of hell speculate on them being famed and acclaimed since before death, but the the truth is they were a d-list failed influencer that got by on cheap controversey and scamming, a broke junkie who burned every shaky bridge he ever had, and a worn-out broadcast production assistant with more rejected auditions and tossed out script pitches than he could count. nobody missed them when they were gone, nobody cared who they were until they were dead.
#because villains who didn't start off supremely powerful are more interesting to me#vees#it's not that they CAN'T be better. or that they're simply ignorant of the ways they fuck up others lives#they actually all do have that knowledge of being the underdog. and it's made them all the more shitty#because they never want to be those people again#narratives about people who make each other worse <3#to be clear they were still shitty people in life. manipulative. consumed by greed and envy. all their individual flaws etc etc#but hell made them into the absolute worst versions of themselves#of course what their Worst Self is and the journey/length of time/initial reaction to being in hell varies#like val sees hell as a continuation of the things happening in life. just w/ the power dynamics always privileging him#it's the same drugs and violence. except the violence isn't just survival anymore but the chance to indulge his deeply sadistic desires#vox has completely dissociated from his time alive. that person is dead and he's reinvented himself 1000 times over since then#90% of the time he has those memory files shoveled into a hidden directory#he refuses to acknowledge that he's still haunted by some of the same insecurities from almost a century ago#val doesn't necessarily see his living self in a fond light but he does see that person as fundamentally him#velvette thinks life was full of people who weren't her demographic but fortunately that's been fixed by sinners!#they just couldn't Get Her and that was all their faults#the primary way they view their past selves can be summed up as: scorn (vox) apathy (valentino) and in denial (velvette)#sorry the bulk of the post was in the tags. i will be doing this again#the scorn is the coping mechanism for shame. of course
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There's an awkward "first date" silence between them, the kind that suggests there isn't going to be a "second". Giselle tries her best to keep the conversation going.
#giselle philip#king edward#enchanted#disneyedit#enchantededit#enchanted 2007#enchanted movie#prince edward#amy adams#rucksack*#so much I love about this scene#the way she's awkwardly playing with her hair#edward's confusion when she says “the day AFTER that”#the way they're just not on the same wave length At All#the very unexcited tone in her voice when she says “well I'm very excited about that but...”#followed by the immediate joy she feels when she sees/orders their hotdogs#like she's so excited for that food it's probably the only part of that date she did enjoy#meanwhile edward just wants this shit to end so they can leave#like he's so bored and uninterested in everything she says#also it's not mentioned here but in the script she continues and mentions wanting to open a small business#and possibly do volunteer work too#and edward doesn't understand even a little bit#god. their date is just. so good. they're both so utterly miserable the whole time I love it so much
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About upcoming chinese wuxia BL The General's Son (将军家的小儿子)
- director and executive producer Ma Huagan (director of Word of Honor) - screenwriter and chief producer Zhou Shucheng - original script - will not be broadcast in mainland China - 24 episodes (rumoured to be 18 mins long) - company Happy Yeah Media 欢宜时光影业 (made Nine Colors Deer King) - started filming: 2024.05.25 - wrapped up: 2024.06.14 (21 days)
starring: - Li Kaiwen as Li Jianwei (born 2002.10.17 height 188cm, studying in the Musical Department of the Chinese Academy of Drama) - Dong Zifan as Chen Xiaoxi (born 1999.07.31 height: 182cm, graduated from University College London) - Wang Chao as Shi Tou, Guan Yuxi as Little Peach, Dong Xiaobai as Princess Qingyuan, Xu Heni, Su Tong, Ao Lei
Synopsis: "General Li's family were killed on New Year's Eve. Li's youngest son, Li Jianwei, as beautiful as jade and spring flowers, escaped death, but disguised himself as a courtesan and went to Wei Mountain to seek revenge. Chen Xiaoxi, a person who was pure and lively, but was killed unjustly and became a devil. What will happen when the two meet on the Wei Mountain?"
#the general's son#将军家的小儿子#at the moment no information about if it will be censored or not they are keeping lowkey as they should#jiang jun jia de xiao er zi#chinese bl#chinese ql#upcoming bl#word of honor#tgssource#mine#mjtag#userspicy#userjap#rinblr#raeblr#tusermona#watched trailer of Nine Colors Deer King and the quality is NICE?? what the hell is this show even going to be#24 eps with 18 mins is the same as 10 full eps of myatb. so a normal length show then. incredible
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Durgetash secret wedding please
#I think a lot about this scene in relation to durgetash only because Aragorn’s robe is the same length as Gortash’s#my brain is a simple place#enver gortash#durgetash#bg3
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as we enter the start of a semester and the dreaded Hour of Making Friends us upon us... if ur ever at a loss for what to say in one of those weird social situations where you only vaguely-know people, one of my favorite questions to ask is "what is your favorite food crime." a food crime is like the food combination that you love that other people find revolting. press them to take it further than pineapple on pizza, that's rote. food crimes is a good topic that has many benefits as it turns out all people are degenerates and also it will give you some cool ideas to try out later in the privacy of your own degenerate kitchen
the other good thing to ask is "okay but has anyone here ever been someplace haunted" bc it turns out if you ask most people directly they don't believe in ghosts, but many people are like "oh yeah i lived in a haunted house. ghosts aren't real tho"
#my food crime is that i regularly make a “pasta and tuna” situation that has somehow gotten even more evil and degenerate over time.#it is a ''white wine reduction'' (it's just white wine and garlic powder & seasoning)#and tuna from a can.#and plain pasta.#if i have the spoons i will actually chop garlic for it but this tends to be my comfort food for a REALLY bad day#bc its super easy to make:#boil pasta. drain. put into bowl for later. into same pot u used for pasta.#put tuna (with oil/water from can). let fry a little for like 2-3 min. put in whatever amount of wine. season to taste.#the tuna will get a little crisp on it which is nice. important side note:#this began as a Bolognese sauce.#and one day i had to sub for tuna. i know. not ideal. i cried about it too.#somehow over time it is now its own little evil thing. i would never make someone else eat it. it is beautiful.#but yeah i don't even stir the pasta in afterwards i just slap pasta into serving bowl#slap this ''''''sauce'''''''' on top#molto bene#(i really can cook fairly well btw. this is a food crime. not a suggestion of skill or ability)#(i LOVE baking but when i cook for myself. the autism is obvious. bc i just don't understand the point of most of the steps)#(.... i can just eat the deli meat out of the bag. it is protein. i don't even have to like it. i just have to eat enough calories.)#(also i used to cook MUCH more before this apartment which is so small that i can stretch my arms out and overreach the counter length.)#(.... i'm 5.2. so.)
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chat i think im gonna be sick
(Powers of X #6)
#xmen#xmen comics#powers of x#charles xavier#snap scans#snap chats#moira stronger than me like ik why we here we're gonna die if not and so that is why she is stronger than me she is committing#i woulda kissed him in this moment too tho she and i are family on that front im afraid i do find him very cute#also. SIDE TANGENT. i loved the art before this of charles slowly processing the horrors of moiras mind ...#EXCELLENT art i must eat it at once#the most devious part of this is after i finished reading i went to go to my brother to talk about What I Read#and the second i pulled up like 'his sad eyes Brother im gonna be sick' he immediately quoted this page I HATE IT HERE#thats why they had to put that dome over charles' eyes so no one could look at his sad eyes anymore#this is in fact something i love and always love seeing but it still hurts i will not LIIIEEE#cant wait to read bout how this all goes horribly wrong ....#while my bro and i were talkin we were talkin bout other in-between stories an i wanna check those out at some point ...#maybe ill check my comic shop sometime in the future idk. for now im gonna throw up !!!!!!!!!!#i will simply spend tomorrow watching the rest of 92 im almost done with it. relatively speaking i will feel healed then probably#i got like two seasons left which is basically the same length as season 3 and then its onto 97#thats just one season for now so ... should finish that quick ..#ok bye i have Being Sick to be
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Mori and Abuse
I’m making this because the BSD fandom has 2 modes for interpreting Mori and it’s either evil evil child abuser or spineless bastard and I HATE both of them.
Mori is an abuser, yes, but the way he abuses characters is very atypical, and not at all what most people expect. His abuse is almost all psychological, the only character we can say for sure has been physically abused by him is Yosano, and we’re only shown one instance of that.
For simplicity, I’ll be referring to his abuse of Dazai, Chuuya, Koyo and Yosano, but I believe it could be said that Kyuusaku and potentially the Akutagawa’s have suffered because of him.
To understand why Mori has abused certain characters, we must understand a bit about him as a person. This is potentially why Mori’s actions are so wildly skewed by the fandom, because no one wants to observe him too closely (but that’s a whole other post). Simply put, Mori is a military man. He does anything and everything to achieve the “optimal solution”, he has a plan and if he has to get his hands dirty to reach his goal, he will. Emotions and attachments go out the window for him, most of the time at least, because he would sacrifice anything, and anyone, to achieve his goal. Most of the time at least. That’s why he used Yosano, because what’s the life of one girl to the safety of his nation? That’s why he manufactured Oda’s and his orphans deaths, because the prize outweighed the cost.
Mori is logical and reserved, so we must observe all his actions with the lens that he has a reason for what he does, because he (almost) always has a reason.
I’ll start by referring to Mori’s abuse of Dazai, because he’s a bit of a special case and also the one that the fandom overall gets the most wrong. Mori’s abuse of Dazai is usually twisted to be sexual or physical, when there is absolutely no evidence of that. People like to bring up Dazai’s abuse of Akutagawa, or that one throwaway line from The Day I Picked Up Dazai as evidence, but neither of those hold up in my opinion.
Firstly, just because Dazai’s abuse of Akutagawa was partly physical, doesn’t mean he himself underwent physical abuse. Just like Mori, Dazai always has reasons for what he does, and his reason for what he did to Akutagawa was tailored to Akutagawa and his ability, therefore not something that Mori would have done to Dazai. Not to excuse Dazai’s abuse of Akutagawa, of course, but the fact of the matter is that Dazai’s abuse was a test of Akutagawa, and a punishment because Akutagawa didn’t adhere to Dazai’s standards. This abuse is the result of Mori’s own abuse, yes, but it’s not as straightforward as “Mori hit Dazai, ergo Dazai hit Akutagawa”.
The line from TDIPUD is also poor evidence, as all it is is Oda telling Dazai that what he’s doing won’t hurt and Dazai responding that Mori says the same about the needles he gives him. The fact that this is taken as abuse is really weird to me, why is that the assumption here? Mori is a doctor, there are multiple reasons for him to be giving Dazai needles. And the fact that Mori says it’s not going to hurt just sounds like the typical “doctor giving a kid a shot” exchange.
Dazai hates pain, so obviously Mori would lie and say that it isn’t going to hurt. Mori cares for Dazai’s well-being, which is what makes Dazai a bit of an outlier, as Mori shows care for him before he’s found a reason to justify that care. This is evidenced by their exchange in the beginning of Dazai, Chuuya: Fifteen, which is very important as it gives us an insight into Mori’s perspective during that time, where he panics because he hasn’t achieved the “optimal solution” by keeping Dazai alive, but then justifies that action by deciding Dazai is too good an asset to throw away.
And here-in lies the actual abuse that Dazai went through, not being hit or shamed or any of that, but emotional coercion, a slow cultivation of the parts of Dazai that Mori saw as useful, and a creation of the mindset we see Dazai use. This is most prominent with how Mori plants ideas into Dazai’s head. This is referenced in Chapter one of Fifteen as well, establishing that Mori has taken somewhat of an instructor role to Dazai, but that’s something Dazai rebels against.
This exchange is a perfect example of that conditioning, instead of giving Dazai information directly, Mori gets Dazai to deduce his answers using information he already has, something we see Dazai does very often in the current plot. But the main example of this conditioning comes in the form of Dazai’s plan to use the Sheep against Chuuya, a plan that comes DIRECTLY from Mori.
Mori makes sure that Dazai is in the room as he baits Chuuya, uses the weakness of the Sheep against him, and then breaks down EXACTLY what has happened for Dazai. “Just some food for thought” my ass.
Then when discussing his plan with Rimbaud, Dazai brings up a theory taught to him by Mori. 15!Dazai is such a little parrot, it’s all “Mori says, Mori says, Mori says”, just word-vomiting all the thoughts Mori puts in his head, there is a CLEAR influence here.
Just like Mori, Dazai uses the Sheep against Chuuya. Mori shows Dazai how to control people, how to make them listen and how to make them obey. The reason Dazai treats people like pawns, the reason he KNOWS how to manipulate people is because Mori taught him.
Just like so many of the characters, the fandom forgets that when Mori met Dazai, he was a child. He was a broken child who needed a guiding hand and the hand he got was Mori’s. Morí crafted the Dazai that we see, shaped the way that he thinks, THAT was his abuse.
Chuuya as well is a special case. Like Mori, he is a leader, and that is a quality Mori admires in him. In turn, Chuuya looks up to Mori, sees him as an inspiration for what it means to be a leader. This is another example of Mori’s manipulative abuse. To Chuuya, Mori makes himself out to be a saviour, someone who will teach him how to be better, how to protect the people he thinks he has failed. Mori takes Chuuya at his weakest point and gives him a new chance.
And with that, Chuuya is loyal to the mafia and Mori has Soukoku. Never mind that Mori was the brains behind Dazai’s plan that got Chuuya into the mafia in the first place, by getting Dazai to do his dirty work, Mori gets to appear to Chuuya with a halo and wings (I could also talk about Mori’s involvement with Stormbringer and how that locked Chuuya into the mafia, but that’s another tangent).
Mori has done the same with Koyo. She’s loyal to him, but clearly does not LIKE him, so where does that loyalty come from? It is because he has freed her. Koyo suffered under the rule of the Old Boss, she had no freedom, the man who cared for her was executed, she was restrained within the mafia. And then Mori takes over and she ends up an executive. Suddenly she’s got POWER, she can change things, under Mori she’s given the ability to change things and take charge. He sees a girl in chains and loosens them, not enough for her to escape, but enough that she can move. And having been chained up for so long, that feels like freedom. Koyo is loyal to Mori because he’s better than the alternative, because if she can’t be free, at least she can move.
I left Yosano for last, because again, she’s a wild card. Unlike all the other people Mori has coerced, Yosano’s abuse took place during a time where every second was precious. There was no time to do it delicately, the way Mori handled everything else, it was war, win or lose. Mori’s tactics were a lot more brutal, Yosano wants the soldiers to live, so Mori shoots the one she cares about so either she WATCHES her friend die, or she can save him. Unlike with Dazai, with Chuuya, with Koyo, Mori isn’t Yosano’s saviour, he’s her captor, he gives her a choice, but its one where neither option is made to look kind. He makes it clear, she heals them, or they die, whether it’s at his hands, or the hands of the enemy, and he knows she would never let them die.
Mori works through coercion and manipulation, he shapes the way people think of him carefully, moulding his appearance in the eyes of others. To Dazai he’s just an old man that Dazai has under his thumb, who tries and fails to manipulate him. But that’s not the truth. To Chuuya he’s a benevolent leader, someone so gracious as to grant him a place in the mafia. But that’s not the truth. To Koyo he’s the safest option, not someone she wants to follow, but someone she will follow, because at least she’s free. But that’s not the truth. To Yosano he’s evil, cruel and harsh and he takes lives as easily as he breathes with no remorse, he’s the God to her Angel of Death. But thats not the truth. To the audience, he’s a monster, a filthy pervert who is nothing more than a pedophile. Is that the truth?
Mori is like a spider, ensnaring people in his web with carefully constructed lies and appearances, his abuse is not physical or sexual, it’s a psychological coercion, careful at times and brutal at others, his abuse is a targeted attack of an individual’s weaknesses, and a cultivation of the parts he sees as useful.
Every person is his tool, and he likes his blades sharp.
@1seaweedbrain1 for you <3
#crossposted on twitter#because i figured out how to use that hellsite#jk it's pretty chill#mostly#anyway Mori is actually one of my favourite characters to analyse he's such a complex mf#I could rant about him sm he makes me ill /pos#does he go for people when they're weak because it's easy?#or because he wants to give the underdog a chance?#or is it both?#he kills without blinking but volunteers at hospitals#he saves and sacrifices lives in the same breath#he go to lengths to keep Dazai healthy but then doesn't care (or know about?) his living situations#this contradictory motherfucker#bsd mori#mori ogai#bsd mori ogai#dazai osamu#bsd dazai#bungou stray dogs dazai#chuuya nakahara#bsd chuuya#bungou stray dogs chuuya#kouyo ozaki#ozaki kouyou#bsd kouyou#bungou stray dogs kouyou#yosano akiko#bsd yosano#bungou stray dogs yosano#bungou stray dogs
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One of my favorite character moments (and the thing that immediately made me love him) for Apollo that I think is so intensely important to understanding him goes way back to Case 2 of Ace Attorney: Apollo Justice.
In that case, Trucy stages a “kidnapping” by using Mr. Hat to distract the court, and when Apollo rushes out into the lobby and sees her safe and sound…
He cries.
He’s so overcome with worry and relief that he cries for a girl he barely knows. A girl who, for all intents and purposes, almost cost him the badge he worked so hard to gain. A girl who focused most of the time they did know each other teasing him and not taking him seriously.
And yet, he cries for her anyway. He sobs, even.
It’s a throwaway moment, likely done for comedic effect, but it really hit me, and Trucy’s immediate earnest response telling Apollo not to cry and then him doubling down with protective rage on her behalf hit it home harder, y’know?
Apollo Justice, at his core, cares. Despite his surly attitude a lot of the time, this is nonetheless a defining trait of his. He cares, so much, and so easily, and we see it firsthand right there as he cries for a near stranger.
(And I also think it’s worth noting that the first time we really, truly see Trucy lower her performance mask and cry herself…it’s to Apollo.)
#apollo justice#trucy wright#ace attorney#rambling hours#actually I can go on and on about these two and their relationship and their characters and how alike and different they are simultaneously#two faves right here frfr#but yeah Apollo crying in case 2 for Trucy made me love him and then he did it AGAIN for Vera at the end of the game#he’s emotional!!!!! he cares!!!!!!! he tries protecting himself with anger and sarcasm but he feels so much it bursts out of him anyway#oh mannnn the way he and Trucy are parallels in certain regards#the way they both latch on to people so quickly and with everything they are#the way both pretend they DONT care in different ways when they very much do#their abandonment issues and inherent abilities do NOT mix well with how much they care for those around them#Apollo gets by through pushing people away or keeping them at arms length#and it’s notable that he only willingly lets people close when those people are hurting (ie clay)#Trucy meanwhile is the opposite in that she brings EVERYONE into her sphere#and in doing so keeps them at the same arms length away that Apollo does#they’re so interesting to think about I love them dearlyyyyy#I LOVE inherently lonely characters#gramarye family stays the most interesting family to me despite basically all of the older members being Awful in some way#and I would even say they’re cursed in some capacity but u didn’t hear that from me lol#also side note but turnabout corner is GOOD actually
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For me the ‘canon homoerotic subtext’ between brick!Valjean and Javert is really more about the parallels between Javert and Eponine, who are explicitly set up as character foils.
Brick!Javert isn’t obsessed with Valjean like he is in adaptations. He’s not psychosexually obsessed with hunting him down; he really doesn’t seem to think of him as being any different than any other criminal—- he doesn’t think about Jean Valjean much at all until after Jean Valjean saves his life.
But after the barricades, Javert’s sudden weird desperate emotions about Jean Valjean are like a twisted mirror of his character foil Eponine’s weird desperate emotions for Marius.
Some guy takes pity on them, and extends them a bit of basic impersonal kindness— and they react by descending into this violently self-destructive suicidal admiration built on self-loathing. They’re both described as making themselves the “dogs” of Marius/Valjean, the dogs of people who barely remember they exist.
And anyway! I think there is potential to explore things there in analysis and fanfiction
#les mis#les mis letters#ANYWAY#this is why my post-seine fanfic is like that#and why i tag it so strangely#how do you tag ‘javert has whatever Eponine had. but for Jean Valjean’#but yeah I keep saying I’m gonna write a full length post about this parallel#but then I don’t#the Valjean/javert and Eponine/Marius parallels are real though#I feel like before I write and overlong masterpost on that#id have to put one together that’s just about the javert-Eponine parallels alone#and yeeg#so much to write#idk if this is coherent I’m typing late and tired 😂#I feel like this is why I often don’t feel the same way as other valvert fans tho
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The Godfather, Mario Puzo | An Hymn to Childhood, Li-Young Lee | Psalm 139: 14 | The Godfather, Mario Puzo | For your own Good, Leah Horlick | Erou, Maya Phillips | The Godfather, Mario Puzo | Ask Polly | The Hours, Michael Cunningham | FROM THE MAKERS OF "TWO-MOM ENERGY DRINK", IT'S "LET YOUR FATHER DIE" ENERGY DRINK
#vito corleone#tom hagen#the godfather#web weaving#this is...unreasonnably long and for that i apologize but what can i say? i had a vision to share with y'all#seriously tho maybe i should have done 2 parts but i don't think it would have hit the same way if i divided it so idk#anyway this thing being so long is a perfect metaphor for me having so much things to say about the relationship between tom and vito#it's such a fundamentally contradictory one and it fascinates me#vito keeps tom at an arm's length his entire childhood. he denies him affection and the right to truly see himself has a part of the family#he also treats him with more care and respect than his own parents ever did and with more kindness than vito does his own children#he undeniably saved his life and give him the type of opportunities tom would never had gotten otherwise#and yet he ruined him just like he ruined michael#father and son of all time#and i haven't even gotten in the parallels in their two own messed up childhood!#i woud have a lot more to say but this is long enough already lmao
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