#and i truly don't know how to make that number bigger

[cloudsinmargoscoffee]

i really miss my old followers and mutuals

[tangents-within-tangents]

Hot take:

Crosshair does not have the Imperial disillusionment and redemption arc of The Bad Batch

Emerie does.

Crosshair has an arc for sure yes but it's not that.

I was thinking about this scene:

and how it got right what this scene kinda didn't:

(It was so close but then bad writing decided to undercut the moment with a joke rip)

And I think it's really interesting that these characters who were more or less raised into the Empire/First Order and chose to leave it are all directly asked why.

But take a look at Crosshair's answers in comparison:

Different context for the asking, yes, but still, compare that to clones like Howzer, Cody, Slip and Cade who left or turned against the Empire because they knew what the Empire is doing is wrong and they weren't just going to blindly follow orders:

Crosshair - Loyalty, Purpose, and Survival

Crosshair didn't choose to join the Empire (though the show isn't very clear or consistent about how much control the inhibitor chips have) but he did, for whatever reason, choose to stay. By the end of S1 we know his chip has been removed and as he definitively says "This is who I am." There were likely still other influences on his decision, but listen to how he talks about the Empire in the S1 finale:

Hunter: Crosshair, I've seen what the Empire is doing. Occupying planets and silencing anyone who stands against them. You know it's not right. Crosshair: You still don’t see the bigger picture, but you will. Hunter: Can't you see they're using you?

Crosshair: We’re not like the regs, we never have been. We’re superior. The Empire can’t protect the galaxy without strength, this is what we were made for. Think of all we could do, together!

Crosshair: You all are meant for more than drifting through the galaxy. It’s time to stop running. Join the Empire, and you will have purpose again.

Hunter: They destroyed an entire city! Crosshair: They did what needed to be done. Kamino, regs, the Republic, that time is over. The Empire will control the entire galaxy, and I am going to be a part of it. Hunter: Don't fool yourself. All you'll ever be to them is a number.

He undeniably knows what the Empire is doing, but he does not care. In fact it sure sounds like he actually supports it and finds self-meaning in it. Hunter spends those episodes trying to convince him it's wrong, he doesn't change his mind. In the end they offer him an out and he doesn't take it.

Wrecker: You coming with us? Crosshair: None of this changes anything. Hunter: You offered us a chance, Crosshair. This is yours. Crosshair: I made my decision.

The next we see Crosshair in "The Solitary Clone" (S2:E3) he follows orders and shoots the Desix governor, right after Cody heartbreakingly tries to do what's right and find a peaceful solution.

Cody: Tell me something, Crosshair. This new Empire, are we making the galaxy better? Crosshair: We’re soldiers, we do what needs to be done. Cody: You know what makes us different from battle droids? We make our own decisions, our own choices. And we have to live with them too.

After this (glorious!) conversation, Crosshair stays. Maybe this began to seed some doubts, but he actually smiles a few scenes later when Rampart assigns him another mission. It seems like for him it truly is as he said in S1:E1 (chip not enhanced yet but still influencing him enough for his brothers to notice he's acting strange):

Crosshair: Republic, Empire... what's the difference.

Crosshair: Orders are orders.

This unethical mission that finally pushed Cody over the edge does not change Crosshair's mind about the Empire, at least not enough for him to take action.

But what does?

Mayday: And here we are, the survivors. Combat troopers stuck babysitting cargo shipments. Crosshair: Mission’s a mission. Mayday: Yeah, I used to say the same thing.

Mayday: After all the clones have done, all we’ve sacrificed. We’re good soldiers, we followed orders. And for what?

This mission has nothing to do with how the fascist Empire treats the galaxy, it's about how they treat their soldiers. It's about how Mayday loyally fought and served his whole life and Lieutenant Nolan let him die

Lt Nolan: He served his purpose as a soldier of the Empire. Crosshair: You could have saved him! Lt Nolan: Perhaps you didn’t hear me, he is expendable, as are you.

Crosshair thought he could find purpose within the Empire, and Nolan shows him exactly what that will be.

His turning point is accompanied with this powerful visual of the ice vulture, a symbol (and threat) of death, and also set up within the episode a symbol of survival:

Mayday: Vicious creatures, but you have to admire ‘em. They find a way to survive.

This critical moment (that gives me chills, oof this episode is a masterpiece!) comes right after Nolan calls him expendable and directly threatens him:

Lt Nolan: And if you speak to me again with such disrespect I'll see to it you meet a similar fate, clone.

then Crosshair sees the vulture's shadow and turns to Mayday's dead body (ahh visual storytelling my beloved) then makes his decision:

Crosshair turns against the Empire not because he believes Hunter was right about this:

Hunter: I've seen what the Empire is doing ... You know it's not right.

but because he was right about this:

Hunter: All you'll ever be to them is a number.

Redemption (both in fiction and irl in my humble opinion) comes with making amends and reparations (which is why death 'redemptions' bother me so much but that's a rant for another time). Unlike Emerie, Crosshair never explicitly denounces the Empire or his own actions within it. He never says anything to specifically show if and how his views have changed from what he said on Kamino. He makes amends with his family (sending the warning message, helping Omega escape, making up with Hunter) but that's about it. The most we get in terms of acknowledgement is this:

Crosshair: I thought I knew what I was getting into with the Empire. I thought I was being a good soldier. Hunter: Nobody really understood what was happening back then. Crosshair: I’ve... done things. I’ve made mistakes. Hunter: I have regrets too, Crosshair. All we can do is keep trying to be better, and who knows there just might be hope for us yet.

Which is nice and all but it's more about them making up as brothers so it's way too excusing tbh ("no one knew what was happening back then" ummm? "The Empire will control the entire galaxy, and I am going to be a part of it" remember? And even if at first Crosshair was being controlled by the chip, the fact that he chose to stay after it was removed* means he condones and is therefore still accountable for those actions).

There's also a bit of self-destructive guilt:

Crosshair: Omega, don't risk anything for me. I belong in here.

Crosshair: Omega needs you both. So I’m doing this alone, it’s what I deserve. Hunter: Don’t even think about plan 99, Crosshair. Omega needs all of us.

(which thank you Hunter for pushing back on the death redemption bs and oh look is that a wrap up for the purpose thing?)

But there's no action taken on his part to make up for what he's done or to stand against the Empire (aside from the bare minimum of help with Tantiss, only after it became personally relevant, which like yeah he had trauma to deal with but still).

While I do think the implications/follow-up of Crosshair's turn should have been handled better in S3 (like rip Howzer! he deserved an apology, but that's a rant for another time), I don't necessarily** think this arc is a bad writing choice. It's just saying different things than we expect:

Maybe Crosshair's story is not about standing up against an unjust system, like we see with many other characters (who deserved more screen time but that's a rant for another timeeee). Maybe his story is about how even those who are loyal to the Empire, who actually believe in it, still suffer under and within it's rule. Not to garner sympathy, but to show that there is no winning.

Crosshair has another 'so what changed' convo in S3:E14 with Rampart, in which they draw parallels to each other:

Rampart: You used to believe good soldiers followed orders. Crosshair: Depends on who's giving them. The Empire betrayed us both. Rampart: And you think you can fight them? That's not you. You're like me, loyal to no one but yourself. Crosshair: I've changed.

(note how he says who's giving the orders, not what the orders are)

"Loyal to no one but yourself" describes Rampart much more than Crosshair, since we often saw Crosshair pride himself as a loyal soldier of the Empire whereas we saw Rampart abuse power to be self-serving within the Empire (like when he killed Wilco to save face). But they were both betrayed either way. Vice Admiral Rampart, snively Imperial opportunist through-and-through, shouts "I was following orders!" as he is arrested for the Empire's purposes. (Edit: and where Crosshair rejected the Empire and found new purpose fighting for his family, Rampart was still self-serving in the finale. He still tries to gain power for himself and he gets his comeuppance).

Even Hemlock, the final boss immoral Imperial scientist, who has to be benefiting the most from this system, echoes the expendability idea:

Hemlock: What I am working on is beyond your understanding. Something so vital to the Empire it makes me indispensable.

Then there's CX-2, also set up as a parallel/foil to Crosshair (fight me), who in the end is discarded as no more than a weapon, a tool that served it's purpose, showing us what would have become of Crosshair if he had stayed.

There is no winning in the Empire. Loyalty is not rewarded, it "doesn't go both ways." Everyone has to fight for their value. Even high ranking individuals** who for a time benefit from the injustice, in the end are just pawns to be used up and cast aside at a whim for the Emperor's gain. Even people who are motivated by self-interest alone cannot survive within this system, the only viable option in this galaxy is to fight the Empire and dismantle that system. (unless you conveniently find a magically safe island to hide away on but that's a rAnT fOr AnOtHeR tImE)

Which brings us back to...

Emerie - Cooperation, Compassion, and Choice

(Okay this post has already gotten away from me but I still want to talk about her to show the contrasts.)

Emerie may not have been given a lot of screen time to really flesh out her development, but there is a lot that is pretty clearly implied with her:

Crosshair: They’ll never turn her [Omega] over. Hemlock: They don’t have a choice. She is a clone, and therefore Imperial property. *Camera cuts to an angle more centered on Emerie’s face*

Crosshair: Give me your access card! Emerie: It won’t get you outside!

Emerie: I tried to warn him what would happen if he did not cooperate with the Doctor.

Emerie: Prisoner? Omega, you are no such thing. It will take time to adjust, but you will acclimate. It is far safer in here than out there.

Emerie: You should go back to your room. Crosshair: You mean her cell?

Emerie: Why children? Hemlock: Children are easier to attain and more agreeable to the subjugations. They are unaware of why they are here and what they possess.

Emerie: They're children. Like I was... Was your plan to discard them too? Nala Se: The Empire will keep them in order to control them.

We don't know a lot about Emerie's background, but it's clear that she had a lot less choice than Crosshair and less opportunity or ability to leave. Unlike Crosshair, we never directly hear Emerie's views of the Empire (and she was most likely 'taken under Hemlock's wing' before the Empire even came to power), but lets look at how she talks about the Tantiss:

"Remain calm. Cooperate and you might survive."

"Don't make this worse, Crosshair! There is no escape!"

"All of us serve a purpose here."

"The Doctor will inform me, if it's necessary."

"It's best not to ask questions."

"Escape is not possible, Omega. This is for your own good."

She honestly does the best she can within the system she is also trapped in. She tries to help Crosshair, Omega, and the vault kids in the only way she knows how (warns Crosshair about the hounds and security, tries to protect Omega from Hemlock, tells Scorch his "actions were extreme" with Jax, insists on overseeing Bayrn's retrieval, double checks his m-count (to give him an out), and tries to find out where he came from). When she gives Omega, and later Eva, the doll, I think it shows just how little she really is able to do here (and it's kinda heartbreaking imo).

The framing of this shot especially (after Jax's escape attempt) visually shows how Emerie herself is trapped/imprisoned:

Despite the fact that very little of this is Emerie's fault, she has very little power and she is doing all she can, the narrative does not excuse her role in the Empire:

Nala Se: What will you do, Emerie? Emerie: There is nothing I can do. I don't have that kind of power. Nala Se: Don't you?

Emerie: I- I was doing my job. Echo: Yeah, I’ve heard that before. You’re a clone. How can you be part of this?

These fighting-the-Bystander-Effect conversations parallel these exchanges:

Hunter: We made a choice, and so did you. Crosshair: Soldiers follow orders. Hunter: Blind allegiance makes you a pawn.

Crosshair: We’re soldiers, we do what needs to be done. Cody: You know what makes us different from battle droids? We make our own decisions, our own choices. And we have to live with them too.

which did not change Crosshair's mind. And honestly, all respect to Echo's disappointed mom glare™ but I think it's clear Emerie had already made her decision, she just needed help to actually be able to do anything about it. When she stopped Echo, with her voice wavering on the verge of tears (ahhh v good voice acting), she clearly had no intention of turning him in. She's on her own in the Empire's most secure facility with very little resources, if she had tried anything on her own she most likely would have failed and been killed

Omega: Emerie, you don't have to do this. Emerie: (sigh) I’m sorry, but I do.

but as soon as she is enabled by an ally, she immediately turns around to help: giving information and getting Echo through security, helping the kids escape, and giving Omega the tablet that allows them to free the other clone prisoners.

Where Crosshair's turn is accompanied by the symbolic imagery of the ice vulture, Emerie's is the removal of her (literally rose-tinted!) glasses:

Symbolizing how she has shed her previous views/indoctrination that altered her perception of the Empire and blinded her to it's wrongs. It's disillusionment.

Emerie's story shows us that even those who are raised and indoctrinated into this system can, should, and will escape (with needed help). Even those who did not choose to be apart of the Empire and are not making the decisions still have the responsibility and ability to act on what they know is right.

Emerie, whose name means 'Home strength' 'Brave' and 'Powerful', and "reflects the importance of leadership and authority in the workplace".***

While Emerie is only in one more scene after her turn, so the wrap up is a bit rushed, she still very simply does what Crosshair does not:

Emerie: Because I was wrong about this place. And I'm trying to do the right thing.

Echo: I’m sure Senator Chuchi would find what you have to say very helpful for our cause. Emerie: I have a lot to make up for. I’d like to help out however I can.

She admits wrong, takes accountability, commits to making amends, and leaves with Echo to go take on the Empire (which hopefully we will get to actually see more of some day).

So, in short, she's showing us how redemption is done right!

---

Notes:

*Whether this writing choice was good/logical/in-character or not is another discussion entirely, but I'm going off of what we were given, what the show is presenting in the canon text and (reasonably inferred/intentional) subtext. Crosshair is pretty multifaceted and I could only touch on so much here. There's a lot of ways to interpret his character/choices, but I tried to avoid the realm of speculation or fanon explanations (even if they sometimes make more sense lol).

**History and political theory are not my area of expertise at all, so I have NO idea how well this aligns with real-world fascism stuff and therefore what implications this storytelling choice could have. I think the message of like 'if you think you could survive or gain power by doing what the Empire/fascist system wants you are wrong' could be good (like how everyone is actually harmed by the patriarchy type of a thing), but I hesitate bc maybe there are those who would benefit, since it's a hierarchal system, right? If anyone more knowledgeable than me has incite to share, by all means

Either way, I do think it works in-story and in-universe though. It's just in the execution. The main problem (even from a strictly theme/character arc stand point) is the lacking follow-up/consequences for Crosshair in S3. Like you gave your character accountability by removing the chip and I think that's great setup for an arc but you gotta follow through with that and actually hold him accountable!

***I'm always curious when clones have 'normal' names, like why did they chose the name Emerie of all things? So I looked it up. Idk how reliable sources are for name meanings so take it with a grain of salt but it's still fun. Fits pretty well, and clones names have definitely had significant meanings in the past (like how Rex and Jesse both mean 'king') so I'm pretty sure it was intentional.

Anyway, thanks for coming to my tedtalk

[charmercharm3r]

In Phases, imagine that Reader gets fucked so good and so well by both that she falls into sub-space, pretty much like Minho does sometimes. No thoughts, mind blank, half-unconscious and she loses awareness of her surroundings for seconds, body only searching for the high. You know what I mean.

How would that happen and how would the bbies react after bringing her to that point??👀

I'm desesperatly in love with your blog btw❤❤

this, I simply couldn't ignore and had to turn it into a whole drabble

Masterlist, Phases Masterlist

☆ﾟ

Sweaty, tired, numb yet somehow on fire, "moaning like a pornstar," was how Jisung put it.

Except porn is fake. This, this feeling, the way they made you feel is entirely real.

Jisung had his back against the headboard, hands behind his head with his mouth agape while he watched you work yourself into a frenzy in his lap. He could hear the wooden headboard banging agains the wall, could feel your skin rubbing uncomfortably against one another because you'd been going at it for so long, but he didn't care, as long as you didn't either. And you clearly didn't.

Because now you were calling Minho over, who was still trying to catch his breath at the foot of the bed from when you milked him just a few minutes ago. "C'mon now kitty, don't keep our cock hungry princess waiting."

You couldn't stop moving, swiveling forward and back to feel Jisung's tip nudge the soft spot within you, mindlessly beckoning your other boyfriend over because you missed his presence. As if he wasn't in you less than five minutes ago, Minho took your hand like a champ and stood by your side, only to be pulled down into a sloppy kiss by the back of the neck, all the while you didn't slow down.

Your hand glided down his wet chest to find his dick raising again, somehow hardening under your touch. You liked the feeling of his tongue in your mouth, but craved something bigger, heavier.

Minho winced against your lips as you tugged at his cock, "can't- hurts-"

"You can, and you will," Jisung instructed before the other could protest.

All three of you knew Minho could take it, if he truly didn't want to, he would've tried hard to fight it or used the safe word. Instead, Minho kissed you deeper and slightly rutted into your hand before pulling away. He moved to stand on the bed, beside where you and Jisung stayed connected. As soon as he was close enough, you reached to take his cock in your mouth, barely trying to suck.

Jisung had the biggest shit-eating smirk on his face, enthralled by the sight before him. Minho held onto the headboard for balance, the feeling of your warm mouth already making him want to crumble from overstimulation. He was already amazed by how much you were still able to take, thinking in the back of his mind that he needed to do more cardio to catch up to you.

The weight of one dick on your tongue, the other filling you so nicely, you didn't think it could get any better-

Correction; you didn't think. You couldn't think.

Every thought in your head drifted away the second your first orgasm passed, you didn't even know what number you were on now. Maybe Jisung knew- you'll find out eventually.

But his hand was wrapping around your throat now, squeezing softly and feeling the air supply slowly dwindling little by little. Slack jawed, Minho took advantage and threaded his fingers in your hair to rut in quick jabs, the drool dripping down your chin and onto Jisung's hand.

Your thighs burned, trying so hard to maintain a rhythm and failing. Jisung could tell, to Minho it was obvious, they were both just proud you were still going. In an attempt to get him to squeeze harder, you placed your hand around Jisung's. Instead of constricting, he lifted you up by the neck to get you to sit high on your knees.

Even with a mouth full of cock, you couldn't contain your moans. The vibrations of your whining made Minho squirm and rut faster, sloppier. Elevated in more ways than just in his lap, Jisung pulled out to the tip only to slam back into you, thrusting from below at a more than leisure pace. His thumb found its way to your clit, rubbing harshly back and forth perfectly to make you grab at Minho's thigh and harder at Jisung's hand around your neck.

Your eyes rolled back, taking Minho in his full stride and the pummeling you were receiving from below. All senses flushed stupid, feeling nothing and everything all at once and in fact, moaning like a pornstar.

It was so good to the point you didn't realize you'd stopped breathing even when Jisung loosened his grip on your windpipe. You were suddenly being lowered into someone's arms and placed with your head against their chest. It felt as though you had just woken up from a deep slumber, but was sweaty and smelled like bodies on bodies.

"Baby, hey hey, come back to us," Jisung cooed sweetly, brushing away the matted hair on your forehead.

Another set of hands was caressing your back, cooled off by a damp towel being wiped up and down the exposed skin.

Your eyes fluttered open, seeing Minho's big browns glossy with concern, "there she is."

"Hm..?" The dryness of your throat hurt a little, as did the joints in your jaw.

Jisung carefully laid you on your back with your head at the foot of the bed. You could hear him distantly chuckle about the pillows being too icky to lay on.

Towering over you, Minho used the same hand cloth to wipe your face, down your neck and body. He gently kissed your belly as he continued to traverse your lower half and legs. Drowsily looking around the room, you almost rolled your eyes behind your head to find Jisung, who popped in upside down into your field of vision.

"You okay, sweetheart? You blacked out on us," before you could answer, he Spiderman kissed you chastely.

"Dicks too good, apparently." Minho and Jisung high fived each other over your limp body.

"Thirsty," you groaned, trying to regain moisture back into your mouth.

"Yeah, you were. I swear my dick was about to fall off." The older chuckled as he sauntered off to the bathroom for a moment once you were clean. Jisung took his place and sat you up to bring a water bottle to your lips.

"Don't complain. Just means we gotta step up our game, right? Hit the gym more often. You got us both beat, pretty princess." Soft and sweet, the blonde leaned forward to kiss your forehead and tip you back again. "But seriously," he said with your cheeks in his hands, "don't ever scare us like that again. It's okay to stop."

You couldn't help the slightly embarrassed giggle, "I would've if I could."

"Look!" Minho came running back into the room, still completely naked. "Lipstick!" Your lipstick. Printed in a ring around the base of his flaccid cock.

Jisung's mouth dropped, "that's so hot. I want one, too."

"You just told me I should sto-"

"Next time, next time. Can't have you breaking in two." Jisung grabbed the blanket from the side chair and draped it over your body.

As Minho tossed the soiled pillows to the ground and got into bed beside you, he murmured, "yet."

-

tags: @sensitiveandhungry @babebatter @changbinluvr @epiphanynaffit @fawnpeaks @linovely @dumplinbokkieracha @finnydraws @naturules @djeniryuu @skzhomiehopper @yesv01 @hyunjinsamdl @dazzlingligth @lvrhyuka @alexis-reads-fics @linaliskz @0002linoskitten @chillichillicrabcrab23 @zerefdragn33l @straycrescent @binnies-donuts @soldierstangirl-blog @bakedlilgoonie @levanterlily @shelbyyy44 @yeetmehome @in2heartz @astroodledream @the-sweetest-rose @goblinracha @lilbugs-things @viviennenstan @staurdvst @alex--awesome--22 @imzenning @jeyelleohe @kaitchan @iadorethemskz @skyvastbunny @mamabymychem @katsukis1wife @woozarts @noellllslut

[pacifymebby]

What would each peaky boy be like with a wife who owns a bakery, one who pops round to meetings with fresh cakes and treats and stuff

This is a really cute request and really feeds my dream of having a bakery one day

Tommy

🌿 your bakery is quite small and easy to miss but once Tommy knows it's there tucked down a side street, pretty much just a hatch in the wall, he never goes a day without visiting

🌿 Always, no matter how busy he is, will take the time to stop by even if only for a second or two to say hello and pick up something to eat. You think he must really love your baking and he does think your breads the best he's ever had however, that's not the reason he stops by every day.

🌿 You'd joke about how he's going to eat you out of heart and home if he carries on like this and he'd very simply say, "Marry me love, then I won't have to will I..." Of course he's only teasing but the blush it paints on your cheeks is priceless and well, he does often wonder what it would be like to marry you.. no harm in putting the idea in your head.

🌿 He says the same thing every time you tease him for stopping by, which you do at least three times a week. It isn't that you're ungrateful for the business it's that you don't understand how a man as busy as Tommy Shelby has time to visit your little bakery every day and you don't understand why he'd want to.

🌿 this little routine, you teasing him, him making that joke, you blushing and going shy, carries on for months and months, it drags on so long that all your friends are certain he's not really joking, that perhaps Birmingham's most infamous has taken a liking to more than just your bread.

🌿 One day when he says it you smile, "if you keep saying that Mr Shelby one day I might just take you seriously..." And he pauses, mouth caught in a half smile, hands in his pockets as causal as you like he looks you up and down to work out whether you're teasing him. "And what would you say if you did?"

🌿 When you're married he'd help you set up a bigger bakery, hires you staff to help you run it, but you always keep your little shop too because that hatch in the wall holds a special place in both your hearts.

🌿 Whenever you think up a new recipe or you're experimenting with new flavours Tommy makes sure to be interested in what you're doing, listening to you when you tell him about your troubles "Thing is I don't know if it's salt I need, to bring out the sweetness, or if I'm just not using enough sugar and then there's the trouble with the Cherry jam it's too... Too..." "Jammy?" He'd tease, "wait no, too cherry flavoured eh, that it love?"

🌿 will be the first to try anything new recipe you've baked and will always give you an honest answer, unless somethings truly awful, then he won't tell you quite how bad it is because he doesn't want to break your heart.

🌿 He will try anything and everything you put in front of him but he has to admit his favourites are the more savoury treats you bake, anything with cheese is an instant hit with Tommy and sometimes, when he's had one of those weeks where he's stressed out, hardly eating at all, living off coffee whiskey and cigarettes, one of your cheese buns is the only thing that can tempt him to take his spectacles off for a moment, come out of his head and back down to earth, back to you.

🌿 Whenever there's a family meeting you always want to use it to get opinions on your baking so any new recipes are prepared specially for the family and you get in a real huff if anyone refuses to try your food... And Tommy always warns them in advance, threatening his brothers to "be fuckin nice yeah, try the cakes, be fuckin nice eh?"

🌿 Sometimes he brings Charlie into the bakery to see you and when you can tell that Tommy's particularly stressed you offer to take care of the young boy. He enjoys baking with you, making a mess with all the flour and sugar. He's your number one taste tester and every time he's in you get him to pick his favourite so that you can advertise whichever items he recommends as "recommended by little Charlie Shelby"

🌿 It sort of turns you into a bit of s matriarch within the family. Whenever anyone's having a party, whenever there's a birthday to prepare for, you're always kept busy baking cakes and sweet treats for the whole family. And when Charlie tells his cousins about the fun he has at the bakery they all want a turn decorating cakes and iced buns with you...

🌿 Tommy definitely falls in love with you a little more every time he drops into your little bakery in the late afternoon to pick his son up, to come face to face with your flour dusted features and your bright smile, watching you suck a little icing from your fingertip to test the sweetness.

🌿 He will almost always catch your hip in his hand, look down at you with longing in his eyes and murmur something sweet like "give us a try of that eh love..." sucking the icing straight from your pinky.

Alfie

🐻 Alfie has been coming to your bakery for a very long time, he remembers when your mother used to run things, remembers her Challah recipe by heart.

🐻 He would often turn up early in the morning before you were open, let himself in anyway and lean, white sleeves pushed up to the elbows against the counter waiting for you to turn up. "Thought you might fancy a little company this mornin miss y/l/n..." The first time he shows you're shocked and you can't hide it. You know he's infamous, a violent criminal who promises nothing but trouble... but you also know he's the baker of Camden town and that your mother was always quite fond of him...

🐻 So you can't turn him down. Not that anyone in their right mind would turn Alfie Solomons down...

🐻 You spend lots of time baking together in that kitchen, it's Alfie's favourite place to be, holed up cosy amid the yeasty smell of baking bread and the sweet scent of fresh pastries. He enjoys your company, enjoys getting close to you, using excuses such as "y'see ziskeit your problem yeahs, that you ain't leanin into it enough, you've gotta kneed with your whole body right, like this..." standing behind you, arms around your waist, kneeding the dough for you with you trapped between him and the counter watching him work.

🐻 You also have lots of little tiffs in the kitchen, him winding you up by putting things away in the wrong places or reorganising cupboards and shelves so that you don't know where any of your belongings are. Him getting tetchy with you when you insist you know a better recipe for something than he does.

🐻 However despite your tiffs Alfie never lets you talk yourself down... Whenever you have a new idea he's always quick to tell you you're a genius. Always calling you the cleverest girl in Camden town, always dramatically complimenting you. Even if something goes wrong, even if a cake isn't perfect or the bread you've baked doesn't quite rise properly he will hush any of your complaints with one finger to your lips, that contemplative frown on his brow

🐻 "Now just you mind what you're about to say yeah my little ziskeit, just you be very careful what words come out that pretty little mouth of yours next yeah because I've got somethin to say right... I've got something to say... This here yeah, it's bread right but... It don't feel right just calling it bread yeah, cause this here ain't any old bread, this bread right it's a fuckin work of art my little ziskeit, this bread right, it's a masterpiece, one of them modern wonders of the fuckin world right... So just you think very carefully yeah about what you're about to say..."

🐻 "Cause I won't put up with no bread slander today right, I've made up my mind and I just won't tolerate it..."

🐻 You teaching him how to delicately decorate cakes and pastries with ornate little designs. Him getting frustrated because his hands are too big and his fingers are a little too clumsy to master the finer details. You hugging him, kissing his cheek when you reassure him that his gingerbread men aren't "fackin elephant man ugly"

🐻 Your flower stained blush mirroring his flower stained blush when you both realise what you've just done.

🐻 When he's busy working all he wants is a visit from you and he always hopes you'll come down with something from the bakery. He literally sits there in his office pining for you and your "delights" as he calls them, and sometimes when you're late or you can't visit he sits there getting more and more grumpy, poor Ollie has to try and lighten the mood but just gets grumbled at.

🐻 And when you do come to visit Alfie at work he gets jealous when you bring stuff for the workers too and he chides you for "spoiling" them. He only does this because he loves the cheeky smile you give him as you sit down in his lap and offer him something sweet to try, "Don't worry Alfie I didn't forget about you..."

🐻 When he flees to Margate you open a bakery together on the seafront, he tends to hide away in the kitchen getting jealous when local boys come in and flirt with you, occasionally when he's feeling particularly protective he'll come out to spook them.

🐻 but for the most part that little bakery on the sea front is your own little slice of heaven, back in London he'd fed you the idea whenever you were getting worried about him and his business. Whenever you started to fear he was in too deep, making too much trouble for himself.

🐻 And now he's finally made good on that promise to you. It's just you, him and Cyril living a peaceful life together in Margate. The smell of freshly baked bread in the mornings, spending evenings together preparing the dough for the next day's batches.

🐻 You've definitely thrown a handful of flower at him multiple times, definitely "pied" him at least once for being a grumpy old martyr.

🐻 He's definitely given you that look, beckoned you over and instructed you to "clean up your mess now ziskeit, reckon you've had your fun with the fuckin creme patissiere..."

🐻 Scoops up said creme patissiere with his two fingers and feeds it to you, won't smile until your lips are closed round his fingers, your eyes locked with his.

Arthur

🍂 Sorry Arthur bby but...

🍂 I feel like he's a really messy eater, like he chews really gross and definitely talks with his mouth full... Crumbs everywhere, always spilling cream or jam down his shirt...

🍂 Which means you have to instruct him on how to eat your cakes and usually clean him up afterwards too. You have to break a piece of cake off for him and place some in his mouth giving him instructions "right close and chew..."

🍂 But no sooner has he closed his mouth and begun to chew is he forgetting himself again, opening his mouth to tell you how fucking lovely it is and you'd have to hush him up.

🍂 "Fuck me darlin this is fuckin delicious, fuckin heavenly..." he starts getting crumbs everywhere, you're watching exasperated but endeared all the same as he gets crumbs all over the floor and himself. You know there's nothing you can do about this.

🍂 You can't help laugh at him, he's so daft sometimes, doesn't seem to have any idea how funny he looks... But you get a cloth and wipe the cream from his mustache, giggling at him, him chuckling along too when he realises what he's done.

🍂 "Sorry love I can't help it, they taste so good I forget me manners..." "Excuses, excuses.." you tut only teasing him. He actually blushes.

🍂 Arthur loves your baking so much that whenever there's a family meeting he all but insists you bring sweet treats along for everyone.

🍂 "Please darlin I'm beggin you, how are we gonna survive Tommy's fuckin speeches without somethin to eat... He'll have us in there all night with nothin to eat... We'll starve if you don't bring us somethin sweet to eat..." he's so dramatic but you always comply, just rolling your eyes and teasing him. "God Arthur anyone would think you haven't just eaten five of these..." You grin packing tins full of pastries to take with you...

🍂 But he can't help it, he loves your baking and he loves you, thinks the sun shines out of you and your gifted hands so he wants to show off his talented girl and her delicious creations... Upon arriving he will very loudly announce that everyone needs to "fuckin shut up and listen to my Y/N cause she's brought everyone some new cakes to try and they're fuckin delicious..."

🍂 He'll make everyone try one, even Tommy and he'll glare at his brother until he says something nice about your baking.

🍂 "We're fuckin blessed right, to have such a fuckin talented baker in the family..."

🍂 You try to teach him to bake but honestly, he's clumsy, he makes a mess, he can't concentrate on the recipe because he's standing close to you and instead of having his hands in the mixing bowl he just keeps trying to grab you and hug you, can't keep his hands or his lips off you for long enough to get through even the most simple of cookie recipes.

🍂 Honestly if ever you've got something important to bake, a wedding or birthday cake, new stock for the shop you have to lock him out of the kitchen until you're done because he's too much of a distraction.

🍂 You have the fear whenever you're working on something delicate, you have to put signs on the doors reminding Arthur not to slam the doors when he comes home. When you hear him coming you brace yourself, hovering round your delicate creation, wincing when he forgets about not slamming the door.

🍂 "Arthur please my love!" "I know I know I'm sorry sweetheart I'll be careful" he says hands in the air all surrender and sweet, making an effort to tip toe and be careful, forgetting three seconds later much to your despair.

John

🌼 John gives me low-key earth sign vibes, not sun sign earth sign vibes but something else, like a moon perhaps? Anyway my point with that is that John definitely has a love of home comforts, mundane, little luxuries... He likes being spoiled with sweet treats. Likes coming home to find you baking with the little ones.

🌼 I mean he really loves it... There's nothing better than finishing a long day at the betting shop surrounded by drunk, rowdy men, to stop by the bakery on his way home only to find one of his children behind the counter, standing on a stool to help you serve customers. He can hear his other kids giggling in the kitchen and he practically jumps over the counter in excitement to see them and all the mischief they're getting up to whilst your backs turned.

🌼 Him asking for one of your finest cakes, and then when Katy holds her hand out to take his money he grins and says "Well y'see kitty my little love, I spent my last penny on flowers for your mammy so Daddy was hoping he could pay with a kiss eh?"

🌼 When she agrees she's very cheeky, she sighs dramatically and says "fine but just this once..." and when he scoops her up and kisses her cheek about to take the cake from her hand she holds it back and says "one more for mammy."

🌼 So he slips behind the counter and slinks his arm around your waist pulling you away from your work to give you a very dragged out, much needed kiss. The kind he really shouldn't be giving you in front of the customers... Not when there's a queue.

🌼 You shoo him away so that you can get back to work telling him to go and sort his little hellraisers out in the kitchen.

🌼 But John doesn't want you to "get back to work" and so once he's rounded the terrors up and helped them clean up their mess in the kitchen he's right back ar your side, gruffly announcing to the line of customers that the bakeries closed and it's time to go home. Each and every one of your attempts at protest is silenced with a kiss and when you open your mouth to argue with him about it again he takes one of the cakes from the counter and puts it in your mouth to silence you so that in your shock there's nothing for you to do but take a bite, chew and cover your mouth to hide your messy giggle.

🌼 "Can't bloody believe you John Shelby! You're a bloody n..." "Irresistible, devilishly handsome, doting husband? I know love you don't need to tell me..." he teases taking the cake from your hands and helping himself to a bite. "Come along flower, we're all waiting for you, we wanna go home..."

🌼 And when faced with John and the wide doe eyes of all your little ones looking like angels now that dad's come and got them into shape... Well you can hardly refuse them.

🌼 Uses "Teach me how to bake love..." as a premise to get some time with you whilst you're working, his minds really not on baking though he is thinking of putting one in the oven...

🌼 At least one of your children have been conceived in that kitchen...

🌼 When you bring the children with you to family meetings so they can give everyone the cupcakes they made, John gives his brothers warning looks like "you will eat these very girly lookin cupcakes and you will tell my girls they're the best thing you've ever eaten!" he makes a big song and dance of telling everyone how amazing they taste.

🌼 Has started food fights in the kitchen with the kids. Has started food fights with his brothers at family meetings because he wasn't satisfied with Tommy's "wow Katy these are really good..."

🌼 Has definitely defused an argument with you by putting a handful of batter in your hand and instructing you to throw it at him. "C'mon flower, you're pissed off with me ain't you, fuckin throw it if you think I deserve it..." then being shocked and a little bit wounded when you actually do throw it... Arms around you immediately play wrestling with you to get his revenge.

🌼 And this usually ends up with the two of you kissing, wiping cake mix from one another's faces, closing the kitchen door so that your customers can't hear how you really resolve a fight...

🌼 Always making special requests, his favourite things you bake are your berry pies and he gets such a huff on when you inform him that you can't make anymore because the berries in question are out of season anymore. "Fuck the seasons.." gets genuinely cross he can't peaky blinder style intimidate the literal seasons.

Bonnie

🍀 It's unsurprising that Bonnie has quite the appetite considering a) he's a growing lad, and b) he's a boxer, always training, always exhausting himself in the ring...

🍀And yet once he finds your bakery, he's never too tired to stop in after a long day training, and you can't deny you don't look forward to seeing that oh so slightly mischievous smile every evening... so much so that sometimes you stay open just waiting for him to drop by.

🍀 He's always very sweet to you, always leans on the counter chatting away to you whilst he eats the sweet buns you save especially for him... It takes him a little while to realise that's what you're doing but when he works it out, that you hold treats back for him and you even stay open a little later waiting just for him he becomes a butterfly filled mess. Feels really proud, starts cheekily calling you things like "my favourite girl"

🍀then he starts stopping in early too, gets up at the crack of dawn just so he can drop by your bakery on his way to the boxing gym. He uses the excuse that he's hungry, that he needs to fuel himself up for the day but really it's because he wants to see more of you. Wants to get you alone.

🍀He joins you in the kitchen, sometimes helping you out, sometimes just sitting on the counter admiring you whilst you work, being a pest getting his fingers in the jam, pinching the strawberries you've carefully halved to top your pastries.

🍀 You're constantly swatting his hands away and threatening to kick him out but by now you both know you never will. That little crush you thought you might have on the young boxer has flourished and you wake up every morning looking forward to seeing him. In the hours between him leaving in the morning and returning to you after training your little bakery feels so empty and lonely without him.

🍀When he pinches some cherries from the top of one of your pies you gasp in frustration about to give him a scolding but when he sees you, your cheeks flushed that glow of annoyance in your eyes he can't help chuckling at you, telling you he's sorry, saying "c'mere dove, I'll share..." youre about to refuse when you catch the pining look in his eyes, the way he looks at you with such a quiet pining... it lights sparks inside you, leaves your heart racing, makes you feel very forgiving.

🍀So you give in and roll your eyes, say fine, come on share then... and though you expect him to place a cherry in your palm instead he plucks one from the stem and pushes it to your lips, watching you breathlessly as you take it in your mouth and sink your teeth into it. A little juice escapes your mouth and stains your lips and the corner of your mouth deep, sweet red.

🍀And he leans in without even thinking about it, kisses the corner of your mouth to catch the juice before it can trickle further and make a mess of your pretty face.

🍀You don't get much baking done after that and the cherry pie youd been labouring over is left forgotten about on the side whilst you and Bonnie get thoroughly lost in eachother.

🍀From then on Bonnie stops in on you twice a day every day, he walks you to and from the bakery morning and night and quite often makes up excuses to bring you back to the caravans at night. The first time you meet his family you're so nervous, wanting to impress them, the way Bonnie's been spending all his time outside the gym "elsewhere" people have begun to talk and so everyone is curious to meet the girl who has stolen his heart.

🍀You bake plenty of delicious buns and breads to gift them trying to make a good first impression and Bonnie is insistent that you really shouldn't have done, that they'll love you regardless of whether you bribe them with food, but secretly he just wants to keep you and your baked goods all to himself. "If everyone knows how good these are they'll all be coming here and then there'll be none left for me!" He says taking another bite from his second cinnamon bun of the afternoon.

🍀He stops talking however when you catch the stray icing hes got on his cheek and suck it off your finger, "Don't be daft Bonnie, I'll always save enough for you."

🍀He goes foraging for berries and fruits, always bringing you wild herbs he's picked that he thinks you'll be able to do something good with, sprigs of lavender and such to weave into your more intricate designs. His favourite thing however is to convince you to close up shop for the day and go foraging with him, taking you out into the country on the back of his pony, showing you all the best places to find your favourite herbs and flowers.

🍀 Pulling you down into the long grass beneath the trees, cradling you in his lap after a long walk, smothering you in kisses and affection.

Isaiah

🐀 Being the quiet, earthy homebody that you are you're not exactly Isaiah's type. He wouldn't even have met you had it not been for Michael dragging him out to your bakery one morning, insisting that you bake the best pastries in town.

🐀 And at first Isaiah is cynical, "fuckin pastries for breakfast are you soft lad, you eat fuckin pastries for breakfast... Them toffs who raised you really mess with your head didn't..." he's still taking the piss out of Michael when they walk into your bakery but one look at you steals the end of his sentence straight from his lips.

🐀 Because even with a light dusting of flour over your nose, your cheeks rosy from the heat of the oven, stray hairs escaping your pretty little hair scarf, he thinks youre the most beautiful woman he has ever laid eyes on and suddenly he's swallowing all his snide remarks.

🐀 and suddenly he's a little embarrassed, a little uncertain of himself because he's realised he's out of his depth when he wants to charm you. You're so different from the other girls in his life that he just doesn't know what to say to you.

🐀 "Would you like to try something sir?" You ask, your softness literally melting Isaiah. Michael is just sniggering a little smug because he'd known this would happen all along. This was his plan all along.

🐀 And then Isaiah realises that if he plays up to being clueless you will give him all the attention he desires offering for him to try different things, explaining what each item is...

🐀 You're surprised when Isaiah comes back the next day without Michael, you honestly weren't expecting to ever see him again.. it was clear to you that the bars and clubs were more his scene, that he'd choose whiskey and dancing over tea and cake anyday... But clearly Isaiah has his heart on the best of both worlds, he goes out at night with the peaky lads, raises hell and then visits you to see the soothing sight of your angel face every morning.

🐀 His curiosity impresses you though and every morning you pick something out special for him to try... You've heard what he gets up to on his Saturday nights and on Sunday morning you make sure you've got just the right cure for his sore head and jaded eyes.

🐀 Then one morning he doesn't show and you begin to worry about him, when Michael drops by you ask after his friend and though at first Michael laughs, giddy with mischievous excitement when he realises his friends been visiting the sweet little baker every morning... Then however he tells you Isaiah's in the hospital, got caught up in some unpleasant business. He doesn't tell you it's Peaky Blinders business but you know what he means...

Michael

🐀 And you're horrified to learn that the charming Peaky boy you'd grown rather fond of is hurt, so you beg Michael to take you to see Isaiah in the hospital. Michael genuinely can't hide his amusement as you busy yourself making up a basket of sweet and savoury treats for Isaiah, he's just watching you fuss over the hardened peaky lad, can't wait to rip the piss out of his friend who's clearly got an admirer.

🐀 And when you turn up at the hospital placing the basket down at Isaiah's bedside he's shocked... A little embarrassed at the way his attachment to you has been revealed so dramatically. But he's also touched, also beginning to realise how nice it is to have some consistency, how much he loves having someone so homely and comforting to take care of him.

🐀 So he invites you to stay, tells Michael to piss off and he lets you feed him one of the sweet buns you brought him. He's being extra charming, flirting with you, teasing you for your having visited him... "Anyone would think you were me girlfriend coming here an spoilin me like this darlin..."

🐀 You're speechless, you don't know what to say to him but you get very flustered and he thinks that's adorable so he puts you out of your misery very quickly, "can't say I'd mind that me like, havin you as me girlfriend... Lookin after me when I've been through the wars..." "If you want to be my boyfriend Isaiah Jesus you'll have to stop all this scrapping... I don't want to spend every Sunday in the hospital with you..."

🐀 But of course it's not the last time Isaiah winds up in the hospital and every time he does you bring him a basket of sweet treats... It makes him rather popular with the rest of the peaky boys who start dropping in on him much more often so that they can pinch treats from that basket when he isn't looking.

🐀 He asks you to teach him how to bake but much like John he can't keep his hands off you for long enough to learn. He does have quite nimble hands though and so eventually he gets very good at plaiting bread dough with you.

🐀 He's always bragging to Michael and Bonnie about you, he'll bring something from the bakery down to the Shelby offices or the boxing gym just so that he can eat it slowly taunting them about how good it is. "Ah ah boys hands off, my girl made this one just for me..."

☘️ You're so stubborn though he realises this is an argument he's not going to win so eventually he settles for a compromise. You can keep your bakery, keep your little business as long as he can be involved somehow. So he insists on helping with your accounts and being involved in the financial side of things... which you're really rather pleased about as you've never liked running the accounts, numbers aren't your friend and you find it so dull being stuck at a desk when all you want is to be in the kitchen.

☘️ Isn't happy that his girl has a job... he should be able to provide for both of you, he earns enough to spoil you rotten and yet you still insist upon working in that bakery.

☘️ But before you met Michael that bakery was your whole life, you've worked so hard to have a bakery all of your own, to have a business that belongs to you, to be able to make a living from something you love and you're not about to give that up for Michael just because he doesn't understand how much your work means to you...

☘️ And when Michael gets involved with the bakery and you begin to work at it together to grow the business you start trying to use it as a pitch to convince him to go straight, to leave his brothers corruption behind and settle for a humble but comfortable life, a safe life with you.

☘️ Of course that never works, Michael has ideas beyond his station, he likes the luxury which comes with being a gangster, he's enamoured by the glamour and fame which comes with being a Peaky Blinder...

☘️ Instead what ends up happening is that your bakery gets dragged into the Shelby business... When the lads hear about the delicious treats you bake they start coming up with excuses to hold their business meetings in your kitchen where they have access to all the delightful treats you bake fresh from the oven. But they're all so charming and Michael never lets them get up to any trouble so you grow quote fond of having them around.

☘️ You're very dedicated to your craft and Michael gets frustrated when sometimes he feels you pay more attention to bread than to him. He will tell you he's taking you out for dinner, ask you to be ready by seven and then find that you aren't even home... When he goes to find you at the bakery youre dusted head to toe in flower, nowhere near suitably dressed up to go to some fancy restaurant.

☘️ And you always look so genuine when you gasp and apologise for having lost track of time, when you start ranting about how you were just desperately trying to perfect this recipe, that you'd tried one idea and almost set fire to the kitchen so had had to start again, then you'd tried this other idea and it was almost right but not quite and that well, you really just wanted to perfect it so that you could bring it home for him to try because you wanted it to be perfect for him...

☘️ Well he thinks you're the sweetest girl in the world and he can't stay mad at you for very long. He loves that at the end of all that you were actually thinking about him all along, trying to bake the perfect treat just for him... He loves that you wanted it to be perfect for him, it makes him feel really special.

☘️ "Ah well never mind eh love," he sighs taking your cheeks in his hands to brush the flower from your face and kiss your nose, "the corrinthian can wait eh, got everything I need right here..."

☘️ He'll even try to help you with your projects sometimes even though he really doesn't like getting his hands dirty. He'll do it for you, just as long as no one else is around to see him doing some "real work"

☘️ Loves being spoilt by you, loves that you value his opinion above everyone else's. Gets a little wounded when you want to take something to a family meeting to ask everyone to try because "my opinion not good enough for you now love?"

☘️ You always have to pacify him with a kiss and a reminder that his opinion is of course the most important.

Taglist:

@inalovesrabbits-blog

@cocoaflowers

@zablife

@jomarch-wannabe

@itsghostgirlyo

@marwwfairy

@toddlerbodybag

@everysage

@tommyshelbywhore

@kas3ylovesyou

@kxnnxy

@starrykitn

@call-sign-shark

@only-malala

@liliac-dreamer

@impossibleheartflower

@mollybegger-blog

[somewherebetweendisorder]

Time

Jason Todd x fem!reader

Warnings: just fluff

~~~

Something nudges your cheek, attempting to draw you from the realm of sleep. You groan, swatting it away, startled by the fleshy thud, the burst of quiet laughter right next to your ear.

"Jasonnnn," you whine, scooting away from his hot breath and peeling your eyes open just enough to take in the red numbers on the alarm clock. "It's seven o'clock, Jason Peter Todd! Why am I awake?"

"I was lonely." His voice is quiet, barely more than a grating whisper, his morning voice thick, his words spoken simply. You roll over so you can face him, huffing at how ridiculous he is but with no real frustration. It's Jason, he's pretty, too pretty to be upset with. His eyes are still blurry with sleep, only half open and vaguely focused on you, hair wild and frizzy from rubbing on his pillow all night, he looks younger like the trouble and years have fallen away.

The blistery light filtering into the room is too bright, making you squint just a little as you take in Jason's face in the soft glow. Your foot brushes his, causing you both to smile, legs tangling together beneath the plush duvet. This moment is one of your favorites. A new day outside your window, but inside it's just you and him, twisted together like one person in his bed, lazy and happy. You're always slow to rise on days like these, sappy, lethargic like the world is stuck in molasses, sweet and unhurried.

"Let's stay in bed all day," you suggest, knowing your boyfriend won't disagree. He's leaning in to kiss you in response, chapped lips tipped up into a barely there smile, eyes full of mirth at the idea, borderline giddy.

"After," you stop him with a finger pressed firmly to his lips, your own lips parting when he kisses the soft pad of your finger, tenderly but full of passion, like he wants you to know something. Something he doesn't have to say. "After you brush your teeth."

Jason rolls his eyes but immediately throws the blankets off in a dramatic flurry of movement, earning a laugh from you. You watch for just a moment as he walks away, appreciating the muscles contracting across his back. Broad shoulders.

"Wait! I'm coming too!" you call to his retreating back, scrambling to get out of bed, instantly missing the warmth and comfort. Tripping into the bathroom just behind him, you plow into his back, rubbing your forehead as you grumble under your breath.

"What the hell, dude?"

"Stay back, babe. There's a big spider."

You squeeze under his arm, trying to find the spider in question. There on the cream-colored tile, a tiny little dark spot against the bright floor is a spider no bigger than your pinky tail. Really, it's smaller than that, but for Jason's benefit, you try to see it as large. Try and fail.

"Jason."

"I'll take care of it, don't worry." He's reaching for a square of toilet paper as he speaks, tongue poking out from between his lips in concentration like this is truly some great feat of bravery for him.

"Jason."

Your hand on his arm stops him, looking over his shoulder at you, big blue eyes questioning. "He's tiny. Leave him alone."

He whips around to fully face you, incredulous, mouth agape. "Leave it? Those things are deadly!"

"I think we can manage. C'mon, we're just supposed to be brushing our teeth, not disrupting the peace. You can kill the spider if it leaves the bathroom. Deal?"

He sighs heavily, long-suffering, casting a distrustful look over his shoulder at the offensive creature who hasn't moved since you entered the bathroom. Hell, it may already be dead. "Fine."

Happy you won the non-argument you hand him his toothbrush, holding yours out as he squeezes a small ball of toothpaste onto the bristles. Wetting your brush beneath a trickle of water you wince as Jason shoves his into his mouth dry.

He grins at your curled lip, tapping his finger off your nose.

"Do you wash your hands without water too?" you tease, eyebrows raised as though no matter what he answers you'll take it as a yes.

"Saves water, baby. I'm eco-friendly."

You shake your head, bumping his hip with your own, smiling softly to yourself as you watch his face in the mirror. His features are expressive, fingers on his unoccupied hand tapping out a catchy beat against the laminate. Your eyes trace the scars littering his face and neck, a careful path down his exposed chest, all of them familiar.

Somehow you both manage to slide closer, thigh to thigh, shoulder to shoulder, as near to one another as you can be. He glances down at you, lifting his hand to wipe a stray glob of foamy toothpaste from the corner of your mouth with his thumb.

The affectionate gesture short circuits your brain, sending your emotions into a hormonal frenzy, desperate for Jason, all of him, needing him all to yourself.

As soon as both toothbrushes clink in the glass cup you store them in, bristles slightly damp, bumping into each other before stilling in the cup, Jason is pulling you in, large hands on your hips, eyes serious, lips seeking yours. The instant his mouth is on yours you can't remember why you stalled, why you didn't demand a kiss as soon as your eyes opened this morning. Soft lips, hot tongue, enough spit to illicit a loud moan that Jason swallows without hesitation. Your fingers are pulling on the ends of his hair, pleading with him for more, earning a happy groan.

Hot fingers against your skin have you shivering in pleasure, hands circling his neck, fingers scraping over muscle and bone, leaving pink lines in their wake. His hands are cupping your butt, encouraging you to wrap your legs around his waist, and you don't resist, squeezing your thighs. The shudder that crawls up his spine is worth it.

When he finally pulls away, a shit-eating grin on his face, you're breathless and dizzy, looking up at him with lovesick eyes.

"Come along, Y/N. Your day in bed awaits."

You slide down his chest, lingering, sneaking another kiss before you take a small step back. With a sweeping gesture, he lets you step past him, the worn carpet beneath your bare feet a familiar path back to his room. He closes the door behind you with a soft click, a soft expression on his face as you crawl beneath the covers, curling into a ball.

"You comin' or what?"

He nods, pulling his curtains closed to shroud the room in as much darkness as possible, wanting to keep your bubble intact, needing to have you alone today.

"We should get a dog," he blurts, eyes widening with an edge of panic the second the words leave his mouth, waiting with bated breath for your reaction. His lips are struggling to form words, an apology, an explanation, some slew of unnecessary syllables.

"We should," you agree, voice soft, reassuring, watching as he visibly sags with relief, tension bleeding into the air around him before dissipating. "A Corgi maybe? Or a French Bulldog," you continue, easily losing yourself in the idea of having a puppy with Jason.

That would be the pinnacle of your life. Coming home from work to Jason cooking dinner to surprise you, feeding harmless scraps to a puppy who waddles over to you the moment you step into the room, trailed by your boyfriend tugging you into a kiss. The idea had never before crossed your mind, but now it seems impossible that you survived without the mental image, the pleasant domesticity of it all turning you to mush in Jason's bed.

"I want a big dog," his voice breaks through your reverie, an argument, but you're much too docile in this state to care.

"A big dog? Yeah, okay. That's fine. A German Shepherd? Or a Doberman?"

Jason hums, finally slipping into bed next to you, body curling around yours. "Yeah, maybe one of those. I don't really know."

"We've got time to figure it out, Jase."

He smiles down at you, eyes bright with something you can't quite describe, happy and relaxed, just enjoying one another's presence.

You've got time.

[xo-cod]

omg more soft Simon pls😭💗 maybe sth with a highly sensitive reader sfw or nsfw whatever works for u... luv ur blog💖

thank you sm lovie :") this is sfw! sorry i got to this so late 😩🤍

dangerous love

"don't make me say it. i can't say the words"

rolling your eyes, you sit on the lap of your beloved lieutenant. the usual firm and stoic ghost has been left at the door, here he's become so affectionate and clingy, the way you adored it. here, he's simon. his calloused hands are wandering, trying to memorise every part on your skin. even though every nook and cranny is burned into his memory, mapped out exactly where and how to caress your body to get you into a whimpering mess.

"i think that's a lie, i think you can say those words simon riley" accentuating his name elicits a small groan from his lips, how he adores it when you take charge and command him. it brings a side of him he doesn't usually feel safe to show others. but you're so different. so warm and comforting, it just naturally comes out, spilling everywhere before he can even comprehend

you're so close to him, your fingers running though his blonde soft hair scratching gently on his scalp. and he relishes in it, his eyes closing out of habit. he can't help but rock underneath you, hoping you'd forget and immerse yourself in pleasure only he can provide you

but tonight, you were on a mission. and certainly not one to settle for any less so you move back but he grumbles a little, his hold on your waist tightening so that you're back close to him. he can't help but breathe in your sweet smell, practically trembling underneath you. like you're simultaneously not enough but yet overriding his senses.

"iloveyou" he mumbles in your neck, breath tickling your chest. it makes you giggle softly, gently pushing him back. your hands lace with his bigger ones, shaking your head as you gaze down at your half sleepy man

"try again, sir" you whisper, your arms around his neck. his eyes darken with lust at the word, instantly thinking about how many ways he could have you. but you don't relent. he knows what you want and maybe it's the fact that he's so tired that all his walls are down or the fact that he's so in love with you, he can't help but give you what you want

simon leans his forehead against your own, the sweetest of smiles pulling on his lips. his hands come to hold yours, his thumb rubbing comforting circles around your knuckles. he breathes you in a little, not used to being so open and vulnerable about his feelings like this. not used to having someone care for him so deeply, not thinking that he could've ever received such a thing in this painful life.

"i love you, with everything in me. i never thought i could feel this way, that it was even bloody possible..." he breaks off, gently chuckling at the predicament he was in. how for years he swore of love, swore off from ever pursuing a relationship in this life. he didn't grow up with adoring parents that showed him what love meant, he couldn't possibly drag someone else deep down in the depths of his pain and misery of his past. the same thing he was running from.

how nobody could hold a candle to him but you managed to light a whole fire deep in his soul. the embers burning more bright and intense than he could've ever imagined. you truly tilted his world on its axis but he didn't care. for once in his life, he was reckless. and he loved it, for it landed him you.

"but there you were, you little minx. and i've fallen for you y/n l/n, more than you think. more than i even bloody know" his voice is soft as he nears the end of his confession, kissing the tip of your nose. there's really nothing more he could think of, he was a man of few words so action was always his number one thing. no words could do it justice. but he'd show you, again and again. so that even if you had a sliver of doubt all of was expelled, he'd make sure of that

"i love you too si..." you whisper, tenderly holding his stubbled face between your palms. your thumbs rub soft circles on the apples of his cheeks, giving into him. you couldn't help it, he was so addicting. your arms go behind his neck, pulling him towards you desperately. and he did the same, his arms tightening around your waist as if you'd disappear right before him. like he couldn't handle the fact that there could possibly be any sort of distance between you both, he pulls you with his strong arms close to his front.

as you got lost in the feeling of him, a surety had rose, lodged deep in his throat. his hands hold you as if you'll slip through his fingers, deepening the kiss as though your lips were the sweetest of drugs. that it'll be you always, for as long as you will let him. for as long as you'll have him

[yooils]

everything i know about love. itoshi brothers (seperately!) x reader. bittersweet. fluff & angst. unrequited love.

☆彡– but really, how can he mourn for something he’s never had ?/ or, reasons why they’ll never love.

a/n: i’m so sorry for the way i delayed all my writings!! the rin thing took so long.

SAE ITOSHI can’t love. (at least, that’s what everyone believes, and what he tells himself.)

he doesn’t love. he criticises, observes, scorns it, but he doesn’t know how to love.

maybe that ability was lost a long time ago– along with his naive passion. maybe it was never there to begin with– a fitting explanation, it seems, for a heartless being like him.

sae itoshi doesn’t love. sae itoshi doesn’t allow himself to indulge in such luxuries. (after all, isn’t football supposed to be his only passion?)

but when he meets you, he feels like his world’s been thrown into turmoil.

you’re leagues above him, he thinks.

you’re more than he deserves; more than what he’s signed up for when he chose his future at the age of 13. there was no love included in the contract. there was only a sponsored one-way trip to spain.

(if anything, he could probably learn to love you.)

you’re kind. you’re so pretty to him that his heart aches when you smile at him. your accidental caresses to his skin makes it feel like it’s burning incessantly, permanently scarring where you touched him. your jokes are so bad sometimes a smile creeps out from his stoic face– but vanishes before you can point it out.

he likes you, but he’ll never love you.

not in this life.

(“you’ve probably noticed, but i do like you as more than a friend, sae.”

sae’s breath hitches. he wants, so desperately, to say yes.

he doesn’t.

your understanding smile lingers with him for days.)

it's no surprise when you start to draw away from him, really. but why does his heart ache when he thinks about a world of soccer– without you?

sae itoshi doesn't love, but now he'll be forever haunted by the whispers of what could have been.

RIN ITOSHI has a warped perception of love.

(after all, he's been hurt before. he knows of the horrors that the ephemeral feeling of love comes with. he knows how this story will end. but while sae itoshi cannot love, rin doesn't need it. he's given up on it, really; the very fabric of love having fallen into his category of 'lukewarm' even when he was a teenager who didn't know better.)

yet through the number of lenses you've seen him through over the years, you wonder if he truly is incapable of loving.

the flame in your heart grows bigger, despite the torrents of mental warnings in your head.

exhibit 1.

for someone who exhibits such emotionless behaviour, he really likes stupid dating sims. and he denies it vehemently, when asked.

“it’s not a matter of the romance. it’s so stupid that it takes my mind off things.” rin deadpans, raising an eyebrow at your sudden question.

exhibit 2.

cutely enough, he has an emo, teenager romance playlist.

(when you point it out, he disagrees that it’s angsty. "it's just for homework. i work better with songs i don't care about as white noise."

–the blatant lie that slips out of his mouth makes you question the very foundation your long standing friendship with rin. was he really that intent on lying about something so amusing?)

exhibit 3.

you've been rin's self proclaimed best friend for as long as you can remember. maybe preschool, or even before.

you know how hard it was for him to keep up with his prodigy brother. you know the lengths he's gone through to earn rank #1 on japan's top 300 footballers. you know rin itoshi, the boy behind the stoic and calculated facade. the boy who says he doesn’t cry, but sometimes finds himself tearing up over sentimental pet movies.

(it’s better this way, you know. it’s better to conceal the fact that you’ve been totally in love with him for almost a decade, from you were both angsty pre-teenagers in middle school until now, in your early twenties, when he’s becoming a rapidly-growing football celebrity and you’re still right where he left you, five years ago.)

there’s no happy ending to this story. there was never meant to be one.

exhibit 4. (the disaster)

it was a mistake.

okay, maybe it was less of a mistake, and more of an impulse decision, considering how little he regretted it the morning after.

he should regret it, shouldn’t he? it’s normal to not regret sleeping with the only person he trusts with his life, right? even if his feelings towards you were only platonic..?

he’s been enchanted by the illusions of love underneath the sheets. now he doesn’t know what to do– when he’s so wrapped up in thoughts of you, you, only you.

does he want to like you? no, heavens, no.

(does he like you, realistically, in an ideal world? yes. so much– maybe he would even sacrifice his career for you in another life.)

love is a curse. love ends everything. love is what fuels his hatred.

does he love you?

even if he does, it’ll be astronomically less than how much you love him, wouldn’t it? does it matter? when he’ll never be enough– when you deserve more?

his rejection– blunt, cold, hits you like a truck.

of course it does.

summary

a part of you will always like rin, you think.

rin is childish– rin, at his twenties– still doesn’t know the true extent of how much you actually like him. you don’t think you’ll ever tell him, either.

maybe you should move on.

how can you, when you’ve been in love with the same person for a decade–? how can you, when he was- is everything to you?

(how could he move on as well– when he’s completely ruined the only person who ever liked him genuinely– without any sort of obligation to do so? how could he, when he was the only one who could be blamed?)

maybe, in ten years, he’ll regret it.

11.22.2023

[noyasaur]

bro i am soo sick of shifting methods. i wanna be able to just close my eyes, set my intention and shift instantly to my dr. is there a way to manifest that? and if so how??

₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊

hellooo anon! and yess this is 100% definitely something that is possible and i'll try and give you some advice for this and maybe some links at the end to help you out further :)

🪐 SHIFTING WITH INTENTION!

now, shifting with intention is something that is 100% possible and is really one of the only things we need to shift. setting intention is quite simple to but it's one of the things that this community overcomplicates sometimes.

intention is an action or plan we mentally decide to do, then we just do it. it's totally possible to train ourselves to close our eyes and just shift, because shifting is an innate ability inside of ourselves that we already know how to do.

even without being aware of it, like we're subconsciously shaping our reality with our assumptions, we're also simultaneously shifting every single second of our lives. however, sometimes the 'tricky' part is our mindset.

🪐 LAW OF ASSUMPTION!

in this case, one of the things you could so is use the law of assumption for this. you could create an assumption such as "i always shift to my desired reality instantly whenever i want," then following the law of assumption, you continue to persist in this belief/assumption as it is true in your imagination (4D). within your imagination, accept it as something true and is something that is something you can already do to which it reflects into your 3D, physical reality!

if you find you start out in doing this and it doesn't work at first or you find yourself having negative feelings towards this new belief, it's okay! there's ways for you to instil this assumption and belief into you until you believe in it- well, not even believing in it. until you truly know that you can do this.

robotic affirming/saturating your mind with affirmations can be an option which is basically just repeating an affirmation over and over again (this is what i sometimes do). or, i would take a moment in my day to imagine myself having this ability. and since i know that whatever i accept to be true in my imagination is my true reality, i don't need to stress and just try my best to continue living my life knowing that this is true for me. or even creating an affirmation or sub-tape of yourself repeating your desired affirmations over and over again can help you instil this new belief into you.

something you could do as well (which is something i personally do) is think of something you do regularly, or even write down a specific number and leave it lying around so whenever you do these things or come across that number, you simply just repeat whatever affirmation you want.

for example, i could write the number 7 on my laptop on a sticky note and whenever i look at that number, i would say to myself with full belief and confidence: "i am a master shifter and can shift on command whenever i want."

🪐 PRACTICING INTENTION-SETTING!

additionally, if you feel like your intention-setting isn't the best, you can always try practicing setting intention. start off with small things you 100% know you can fulfil, such as deciding to brush your teeth or intending to make toast. say whatever phrase you want as an 'intention-setting phrase' and then complete the action. then work your way up to bigger things such as intending to wake up at a certain time without an alarm clock, for instance. and then eventually, use intention to shift instantly/on command whenever you feel ready.

along with your phrase, you could even choose a certain motion like waving your arm and clapping three times to pair with your intention. so whenever you do this specific motion and affirmation, you do whatever you intend to do (and in this case, you shift).

for example, you could say/decide to yourself "i intend to brush my teeth," and then you go brush your teeth, that is an example of you setting an intention and then going to fulfil it.

🪐 EXTRA ADVICE!

and even if you set an intention to shift and you don't shift, be indifferent to it and carry on with your life. act if if you did shift and it's so easy to shift with intention, incorporating the law of assumption into it. the law of assumption NEVER fails.

working on your mindset helps too! honestly BE that person who knows they can shift on command at any time so effortlessly and easily. don't be afraid to be confident and cocky about it too, be confident and cocky about it too because you can!!! your assumptions create your reality so if you start thinking and assuming you can't shift or it's not going to work then it simply won't work. start rooting for yourself that you can do it!

but honestly, there's so many different methods and tools you can use to help with intention-setting but at the end of the day, it's all up to you to decide what's best for you and what action to take to go along this path.

and remember, setting intention is easy. don't just try to set an intention and try to it. it's as simple as setting an intention and doing it.

it's seriously can be as simple as deciding to head to bed, setting an intention and deciding that when you fall asleep you will wake up in your desired reality. or even as simple as thinking of where you want to shift to, setting an intention and just shifting. it might all seem hard to believe but that's why it's important to have faith, confidence and trust in yourself.

🪐 AFFIRMATION EXAMPLES!

I always shift to my desired reality on command.

I always shift to my desired reality whenever I want.

Why do I always shift to my desired reality whenever I want?

Why is shifting so easy for me?

How am I always shifting whenever I want?

I always shift to my desired reality when I fall asleep

I always shift to my desired reality whenever I intend to do so

I can shift realities just by setting intention

I can shift realities whenever I want to

Whenever I close my eyes and want to shift, I always shift to my desired reality

Shifting on command is so easy for me! I just say "___" and then I shift!

Why is shifting on command so easy for me?

anyways, i hope i could help and good luck with shifting! i believe in you and i know you can do this so have some confidence and faith in yourself and you got this!!! (≧◡≦) ♡

- saturn ♡

below are some links of users who have shifted on command and ways they worked out how to do it! i advise you to read these at your own pace and not overconsume it all at once.

how i started shifting on command with loa - https://aminoapps.com/c/desired/page/blog/how-i-started-shifting-on-command-with-loa/XYkm_81UguJGeKQ3ZJvk51dnbEZnZpogX

how i (kinda) taught myself to shift on command - https://aminoapps.com/c/desired/page/blog/deg-how-i-kinda-taught-myself-to-shift-on-command/47Wq_PwtYuNvwVaM5z7d835KQkoGYxQZpR

shifted home twice on command - https://aminoapps.com/c/desired/page/blog/shifted-home-twice-on-command/W5wM_8lIXulXwB8v8ebPoG5g70gp0R6oj

how i shift everytime: step by step - https://aminoapps.com/c/desired/page/blog/how-i-shift-everytime-step-by-step/W5wM_8lIXu7L7YqwmY0LwoYMeG7JXjD6Y

i taught myself how to shift on command - https://aminoapps.com/c/desired/page/blog/i-taught-myself-how-to-shift-on-command/W5wM_8lIXuR3nKRalW40VNLGr3d1zqY4Yw

[lovelyladyabsinthewrites]

All I Ever Wanted, All I Ever Needed

Pairing: Homelander x Supe!Reader

Warnings: siblingxsibling implications, Homelander being such a narcissist that he falls in "love" with his own sibling, Homelander being a stalker, innocent reader, naive reader, Homelander being a basic menace, first time writing for this fandom, also experimenting a new writing style

Words: 5688

Summary: Along with the existence of Ryan, there was another secret being kept from Homelander that he manages to rip out of Vogelbaum's throat: he has a sister.

Part 2 Part 3

The house was quaint, way too fucking perfect in Homelander's opinion. Just like all the other mansions on the block. When he went back to Vogelbaum to find out the REAL truth about Becca, he'd forced Jonah to tell him anymore lies that were being kept from him. He hadn't anticipated there being a second secret: Homlander has a sister. Rare to be caught speechless, he leaves Vogelbaum's massive mansion. What else was Vought hiding from him? Not just Vought, but Madelyn as well. She'd lied to Homelander before. Now he'd take things into his own control.

From the slip of information Vogelbaum wheezed out , Homelander remembers the address. Stares at the numbers in front of the house that matches what Johan said. Architecture reeks of wealth. He didn't have to peek into the large bay windows to know that each corner dripped with elegance as was appropriate for a big time Vought executive. You were granted an entirely different life than what Homelander suffered from. Raised with loving parents who encouraged you to cultivate your powers in a positive way. Dinner was a sit down affair where everyone discussed highlights of the day. An authentic family unit. After discovering the truth of both you and Becca, he raided the archives for more information about her. Birth records, school reports, personal notes of progress from the adopted parents. Doted on. If only he had knowledge of you sooner. Homelander missed out on having a genuine bond to someone. A person he could truly call his own.

Superhuman eyes detect multiple people in the house. No worries. Once he presents himself, they won't deny him anything. Unless they want to end up like Stillwell and many others.

Insurmountable confidence has his gloved hand wrapping knuckles against the wood of the front door. He clasps his hands behind his back and waits. Scattering voices whisper amongst the other before feet lumber down several steps of stairs. A moment passes before the locks on the doors click open to reveal the stereotypcial dowdy housemaid. What a cliche.

Her eyes damn near pop out of her head, her mouth pulling into an ecstatic smile. Good, didn't look like there'd be much resistance. He didn't even get a chance to open his mouth before the maid pulls him in. "Oh she'll be SO delighted to see you Homlander! Please- wait here while I get her!" She frantically calls up the stairs, using the name he knew belonged to you, his sister. A sudden pang of warmth pleasantly grips him at the knowledge that you were already a fan of him. Maybe even admired Homelander. That makes him stand a bit taller.

At the top of the stairs, there you stood. You didn't believe in Diane when she told you the Homelander was at the front door. Even as you stare at him with your own striking cornflower blue eyes, your mind melts and you still don't believe what you see before you; that he's there in the flesh until his grin broadens. A brush stroke of awestruck sweeps across his expression.

Homelander found you absolutely perfect. And the smile that broke out on your own face took his breath away. An authentic smile of his own graces his facial muscles. You were a vision before him. Utter helplessness renders speech useless as he simply stares right into you. There must be a blush on your face, how could there not be one when he's staring so intently at you. He was bigger and better in real life. A wider range of emotions more available on his face opposed to the mask you saw him wear sometimes on screen. Stiff and uncomfortable. This one was even more appealing. His smile made his blue eyes crinkle with delight.

"Wow." You breathe out and feel Diane eagerly bounce behind you. "It's really you!" As fast as your mouth could go, you introduce yourself and Diane despite Homelander already knowing your name, birthdate and social security number. Whatever information he could get on you. Not even in his imagination could he truly conjure you up though.

Bringing him to the drawing room with a small tug on his gloved hands, you beam at him and say that your mom would be so excited to meet him. The light of your face makes his heart melt, something he long believed he didn't possess.

Seated already on a cream colored couch was your mom. She drops her cup and saucer, letting it shatter against the ground. Eyes incredulously wide but not with enthusiasm like you assume they'd be. Your grin drops a bit when you realize she's scared. Of what? Certainly not Homelander. Couldn't be. She'd been perfectly fine when you passed by the sitting room a few moments before heading upstairs.

Immediately the maid scrambles to clean up the mess, chirping apologies as she gathers the pieces up in her apron before scuttling away to dispose of the broken porcelain pieces.

"Homelander," your mom's voice came out as a squeak. "What a surprise to see you." She blinks out of nervousness.

"Thought I would treat Vought's wonderful executive crew with a surprise visit!" Businessman smile activated, Homelander goes on with some well rehearsed corporate bull crap spiel about how Vought appreciated all of their wonderful workers. He could practically lap at the fear emanating from your mom as she sat tightlipped against frilly decorative throw pillows. That could only mean she was in on the secret too and knew who you really were. Most importantly why he was there. She must have known that when he eventually found out, he would come.

Your mom's smile is frigid as her hand is clamped down on your forearm. "What an honor, thank you Homelander." You could tell she wanted him gone. With your own incredible olfactory receptors, you could smell her sweat too.

Hands behind his back in his usual resting stance, Homelander admits "I do have another reason for coming here too." Boots squeak as he takes just one simple step closer that has your mom's nails digging into you. It didn't hurt you but from her white knuckles she was definitely using all her strength. "A little bird told me you're special, like me."

Admittedly you beam with pride when he spoke of you being special like him. When your powers start to grow you were thrilled to find out that you had the exact powers that Homelander, the greatest superhero in the world!

Coyly and not wanting to come off as arrogant, you flutter your gaze down to your lap. "Well, I'm still nowhere near your league." Just to show off a little, you make your eyes sizzle red with heat vision that Homelander also possessed. His smile widens at your display of superability.

"How would you like to train at Vought with the Seven? You'll have the best of the best as your teachers."

He'd said it so easily you didn't take him seriously the first time. Blinking at him until it dawned on you. "R-Really?"

"Honey, this is all very sudden. Lets wait for your father to come home." She attempts to placate you but now all you can think about is the possibility of training alongside the rest of the Seven. Immediately you want to remind her that you were an adult and could take up this offer with or without your father's permission.

You don't have to because Homelander smoothly lies to her face. "Oh, no need to worry about that. Your husband already gave the go ahead!"

Her brows scrunch in a disbelieving frown. "He did?" She couldn't out right accuse the Homelander of lying.

"Of course! He was ecstatic at the opportunity his little girl would have." His tone is syrupy sweet. He couldn't show how annoyed he was with your mom. If he had informed the patriarch of your family, he doubts the man would have objected. Not to Homelander at least. They could go crying to Stand Edger for all he cared. Vought's CEO was just as powerless in stopping him once he has his mind set on something. Try as they might. Madelyn Stillwell came close to being able to manipulate him, but he'd melted her face off days prior so there was no use in Edger wielding her as a weapon.

Now you're the one clawing at your mom's arm. "Did you hear that! He said I could go! I gotta pack!" Hopping to your feet, in the blink of an eye you're dashing out of the living room and up the stairs before your mom could stutter out another word. It was just her and Homelander now with the occasional house help peeking into the living room to catch a glimpse of the glorious leader of the Seven. Visibly she swallows thickly, her eyes stare at Homelander with unrelenting fear.

"What? Did you really expect me not to find out?" Cheery smile not leaving his face, his voice reveals the sneer that he so wished to deliver to her. As it was he was keeping his voice down in case you had superhearing like he did.

The rims of her eyes glisten with unshed tears. She had to be the same age Madelyn was before he killed her. "I-I thought we had more time. Please don't take her. Please. You can come see her as much as you want. You have that right as her b-brother. But please- leave her with us." Practically gasping as she keeps her panic in control. Lines around her lips tremble. Homelander takes in her pathetic form.

"Tell me, do you love her?"

That makes her tears roll freely down her face. "I do. We do. She's a good girl. S-She wants to be a superhero, wants to protect people and use her powers for good. Please don't take her!"

Homelander snaps. "Quit your fucking blubbering."

Her mouth instantly zips shut, knowing what he did to Stillwell. Her husband had warned her early on about the real Homelander. He wasn't the perfect hero that the media painted him as. Even if you were upstairs, he wouldn't hesitate to come back and kill her. He's paused for a moment, listening to the pitter patter of your feet above. Happy that you were still busy and not paying attention to what was going on downstairs.

False saccharine face goes back up. "There's no reason for tears. You've done your job. Said so yourself that she's a good girl. She's a young adult though and doesn't need her mommy and daddy poking around in her business. Not to mention the big secret you and your husband are keeping from her."

Leaning over her, he sinisterly utters under his breath "She's coming with me. Now put a smile on your face and fucking wipe your goddamn eyes. You look disgusting. She's coming down the stairs."

Easily toting a giant backpack and two overstuffed duffle bags, you stride back into the living room. To Homelander's surprise, another duffle bag was floating behind you. Apparently you had telekinesis too. Your smile is so big that it was starting to hurt your face. This was the chance of a lifetime. You'd been getting bored stuck at home as of late.

Eagerly clenching the straps of your two duffle bags in your hands, you beam expectantly at your mom. "Sorry about dad not being here to see me off, but I'll see him around at Vought!" You go in to hug your stunned mom and promise to call her when you arrive at the tower.

Homelander is tickled pink by your enthusiasm and haul your bags out to the front porch. "Can you fly?"

You grin deviously and give your mom one last wave goodbye. Homelander takes the duffles out of your hands even though you were fully capable of carrying possibly even more luggage. What a gentleman. Something guys your age weren't.

He takes off first into the sky with you following, hot on his tail.

Never had you experienced this level of elation. You have someone to fly with! The feeling was the same for Homelander. He'd boost his speed and you caught up with him in seconds. Laughing the entire time. It makes him giddy and laughs along with you.

Twin flames.

Finally, Homelander was getting what he's wanted since he was a young boy.

You were a streak of gold as you zoom past him cheekily. For a moment he forgets that you're his sister. He's overwhelmed by the sudden warming in his chest that bleeds to his face as he watches you zip in the open air with your arms wide open to embrace the wind itself. To him you were beautiful in every single way. A perfect specimen. An outright desirous scream in his head confounds him. He didn't have a regular up bringing, but Homelander knew that this was not a common reaction to have with blood kin.

Expertly he tucks that thought away. He'd examine it later. Right now, he needed to focus on catching up with you.

He had to take the lead anyway since he was the only one who could find Vought Tower so high up in the sky and miles away. Below you, the city looks like a toy replica by how small it was as you follow Homelander's lead in the sky. You'd never seen anything quite like it. Where you'd lived was a quiet suburb. You didn't go to a public or private school but taught at home by the best instructors your parents could buy. They tend to keep you away from big cities, claiming your buddening powers as a liability if something bad were to happen. When they brought up things like that, it made you scared to even try using them. But watching Homelander's Vought produced movies gave you the courage to start playing with your abilities and push your limits; even if it meant that you subsequently knocked down the large tree in your backyard and landing it on the side of the house. That was the first time your dad had ever yelled at you.

From seeing it on the news many times, you notice the tall, silver column as Vought Tower. Homelander slows down as you had been too busy with sight seeing, but he didn't mind. He thought you were adorable, basically a little kid at Voughtland. So easily excited about everything new. That just reaffirms his suspicion that your parents had locked you up in an oppressive cage. Just like Becca did with Ryan. Really, Homelander was doing you a favor by setting you free and into his secure and guiding hands.

Both of you easily land on the roof of the tower, a door at the ready for them to enter the structure itself. You gaze out from the roof, enjoying the noise of the city and the pure energy that buzzed through it. That morning seemed so long ago. A basic start to your day, just like any other morning for the boring, safe life your parents smothered you with.

Your excitement makes your features glow, even blinding Homelander who couldn't keep his eyes off of you. You were utterly intriguing to him. An entirely different species. Both of you were so much alike yet due to your upbringing near solar opposites at the same time. Finally when you turn away from observing gaze and look to Homelander, he opens the door for you. In more ways than one. He takes you from the rooftop and into the thrum of the tower. You can't help staring at everything you walk by. All the while he goes on to promise you a room as soon as he could find-

"Ashley! There you are!" He calls out to a jumpy red head who looks both relieved and incredibly stressed out once she spots you next to him. Her lips smack against one another, flailing for useful words, her eyes round and staring at you. "We need to get a room set up for our new friend here." Homelander introduces you and you hold out a hand for Ashley to shake. Fumbling with her tablet, a sweaty hand weakly reaches out for a fast shake.

"Nice to meet you. Homelander, can I have a word with you?" Ashley hesitantly asks, forcing a fake smile and much like your mom had Ashley reeked of fear.

Homelander quickly catches your dampening smile and puts a hand on your shoulder to steer you past her. "Not now, Ashley. I have to show her around the rest of the tower. Especially the Seven's very own conference room." That brings the enthusiasm back onto your lips. While he can still hear Ashley's frantic voice trying to get him to come back he could care less. Besides, you didn't appear too affected by bumping into her, the prospect of seeing the Seven's personal conference room had you instantly forgetting the nervous red head.

A large window that spans from wall to wall has the perfect picture of the metropolis skyline in its massive frame. This felt like a perspective only the elite were privlidged enough to gaze from.

Focal point of the room though was the massive circular table, meticulously crafted with dark marble and metal. A symbol of the Seven's authority. It gleams liquid night. At the head of the table was one lone chair, away from the others. Homelander's chair. This is where he got to work every day with the greatest superheroes the country has to offer.

Watching you glide to his chair, Homelander smirks to himself. You catch it when you glance up at him with brilliant moon eyes. The brightness from the world outside casts a brilliant light around you. "I can't believe I'm in Homelander's seat!"

He chuckles and slowly trails over to you. His gloved fingers trail along the tops of the other chairs in a near gentle caress. "It suits you."

You avert your gaze from those fingers, suddenly feeling a flush crawl up your neck. "Is this really happening?" You incredulously peer at him. Your own hands glide along the table's surface. "This morning I was eating breakfast in our dining room, now I'm here with the greatest hero of all time." Brows scrunch together. Besides having powers, your life had been mundane. You'd never even been to Vought Tower where your dad had worked for a good thirty years. Things like this don't happen in a span of four hours. Insane. And it was all thanks to Homelander who saw potential in you.

"You'll get used to it. It's a lot at first." He acknowledged. Homelander wonders if Ashely has procured a room for you yet and has half the mind to call her until the conference room doors open. You throw yourself out of his chair, afraid how it would be perceived by his colleagues. Gasping when you find out it's Starlight and Queen Maeve. They appeared to be in a deep conversation. But once they register you and Homelander, whatever they'd been discussing becomes secondary. How could it not when you had similar characteristics with the man standing next to you. You weren't anyone they've met before. Nor were you a sponsoring celebrity or executive. So what were you doing there all of places?

"Impeccable timing!" He merely claps his hands together. "The two most perfect heroes to welcome you to the Tower." Starlight can't resist lookng at you with concern, wondering if you were in distress despite the smile plastered on your face. When there's no obvious sign of you being uncomfortable, Starlight strains to conjure the semblance of an easy going smile. Homelander told them that you were their new hero-in-training. Neither Queen Maeve or Starlight have ever heard of this position, it hadn't existed but once it leaves their leader's mouth, it might as well have been law. Maeve knew to tread carefully with her words.

Her own mask was honed after years of dealing with his psychopathy and Maeve dawned it on herself with ease. "Wonderful news." She turns to you, statuesque and beautiful. "Welcome. If Homelander speaks so highly of you, then I'm sure you'll find your footing around here."

"I'm excited to learn from both of you and I'll make sure not to get in the way." You promise which cracks a sympathetic smile from Starlight. From your appearance, Starlight deduces that you had to be a year or two younger than her and understood how it felt to abruptly be thrust into the life of the Seven.

Homelander clears his throat and offers you his arm. "Lets go see if Ashley's got that room ready for you. I'm sure you want to settle down."

Before leaving, Homelander sends both women a pointed glare over his shoulder as the doors close behind his red, white and blue cape.

Stunned, Starlight turns to Maeve knowing nothing good would come of this new installment of Vought. Neither had seen nor heard of you. You seemed relatively innocent and ignorant of the danger you were in so close to Homelander.

Maeve shrugs, indifference cloaking how she really felt. "Not our problem."

Starlight's eyes round in disbelief. "Sounds like its going to be a problem sooner or later. Something's up. He doesn't just show interest in random strangers. Even if they're supes too."

Chewing on the inside of her mouth, Maeve is aware of the terrible possibility that this could all end badly for you. Having Homelander's attention did more harm than good. If they wanted any chance of intervening, they'd have to be extremely careful. Homelander may be an egotistical man, but he wasn't a dumb man. He'd catch on immediately if either Starlight or Maeve slip in their investigation toward who you are.

"All we can do is keep an eye out for her and guide her." Maeve murmurs, worried that Homelander may still be listening. Such was the paranoia that she'd developed from all the years they worked together. It was upsetting that her relationship with HOmelander outlasts any other, even Elena. They'd known one another for years. The manner that Homelander hovered around you though was disconcerting. If intervention were needed, there was no way Homelander would let anyone near you.

Starlight grits down on her back molars as she moves around Maeve and out of the conference room. But she couldn't just keep an eye on you. Her feet take her to Ashley's office although her brain was reminding her that the VP of Hero Management would most likely not be there.

After finally hounding down Ashley, you're shown your new room in Vought with a promise from Homelander that you could redecorate it all if you like. All the while it's impossible to ignore the heavy smell of fear from her.

Homelander couldn't pretend not to notice either as his mouth, still holding onto a smile, becomes tight with force. "Thank you Ashley, that will be all."

For not being a supe, she gave A-Train a run for his money as Ashley booked it out of there in the blink of an eye.

"I'll make sure everything else is taken care of and given to you as soon as possible. For now though, relax. I'll put together a team dinner tonight so you can meet everyone else." The face he'd had with Ashley was washed away now replaced with genuine plesantaness.

You examine what was more than a simple room, this was a penthouse apartment. Bigger than the room you had back home with actual marble columns that stand proudly from floor to ceiling. A similar expansive window like that of the conference room greets the city outside with a glittery afternoon effect. Gold and amber filter the sky. Lost in the gleam of it all, you float around; eyes big in wonder. You lived in luxury before, but now your surroundings were damn near extravagant. This was an entire level up from your usual lifestyle.

Barely managing to breathe out an 'okay', you hear the front door open then close.

Still reeling, you place your backpack along with your other luggage at the foyer and let yourself wander. The call to your mom could wait. This moment was for you. You felt seen.

You would be a hero like Homelander. Maybe never as great as him, but some day you could achieve his caliber. This was really happening.

Homelander never imagined his day would have turned into something like this either. His miles hasn't left since leaving your room as he strolls through the halls to make sure your paperwork was properly handled. He felt like he was flying his entire way to the elevators yet his feet were firmly planted on the ground. There were so many things he wanted to do with you. So much he wanted to talk about.

But. . .

He couldn't let you know about the tie you had to him. More than you sharing powers. Blood connected the both of you. The only person (besides Ryan) who could boast that. It was something sacred to him. Of course nothing could remain pure when it came to Homelander. Because you were his sister that meant you were just as perfect as he was. Even more so since you had the added skill of telekinesis. The only person alive truly worthy of being with him. Thinking about his future had butterflies flapping their paper thin wings along the inside of his stomach. To take you the way he desired, Homelander had to make sure no one knew of your biological relationship. Public opinion would demonize him were the fact to get out. Initially he thought of keeping you locked up, but that was an unlikely scenario which would lead to you fighting against him. He wants you to be pliant and willing. That required trust to be developed along with Homelander worming his way into your brain and heart.

Hopefully the look he shot Starlight and Maeve on his way out was enough to prevent either of them in snooping around for information about you. This was his business that they should not meddle in. Particularly Starlight's intentions bothered him. She was a snake in the grass, proven it by aligning herself with Hughie and the rest of the Boys. He saw her being a problem in the future. That concerned look she'd had when her eyes fell upon you spelled trouble brewing.

The pep in his step dwindles thinking of it, jaw tightening. If Starlight found out you were siblings, it would put a wrench in the plans he was formulating. His long desired family unit was within reach. He could practically hear Ryan's laughter, see you chasing after the young boy as if he were your very own. How pretty you would look in summer clothes, waiting for Homelander to come home. The life of his dreams. The life Vought fabricated for his backstory could so easily become reality. He'd just been missing two important pieces. They were essential to this new life Homelander wished for.

There were no qualms over the idea of killing Starlight. Problems would be for Vought trying to cover it up. Not to mention the situation that would inevitably arise with Billy Butcher, especially now that he knew his wife was alive and raising the supe's son. Another encounter with him lay in wait. A headache he wasn't looking forward to dealing with. He just wanted to focus on you and Ryan.

Arriving at the gold plated elevator doors, he presses down on the button that would take him to floor 82, Mr. Edgar's floor. That was Mr. Edgar's kingdom which he ruled with an iron fist and ruthless attitude. When the two doors slide open, Ashley jumps back clearly startled by yet again running into him.

"I-I trust the room is to her liking?" Ashley's mouth twitches and morphs into what she must have thought passed off as a smile.

He stalks into the elevator forcing Ashley to seek refuge in the further most corner. Darkling tutting, Homelander waits for the doors to close before addressing the vice president who was charged with dealing with these self entitled heroes. "You're going to have to try a lot harder at pretending you're not scared. You stink of fear and if I can smell it, so could she."

Paling, her head rapidly nods in complete understanding all the while trying to relax her facial muscles into neutrality as well as taking a few deep breaths. If she didn't fix herself immediately. . . it brought back memories of Blindspot.

For a few seconds he watches her, specifically listening to her erratic heartbeat. At least she listened and didn't need to be told twice. Through her own sheer will, Ashley manages to calm herself enough to lower her pulse, not the easiest thing when her number one stressor was stuck in an elevator with her.

She reaches a hand up to her red hair and anxiously curls a lock of it around her finger instead, her only outlet that she'd be allowed.

"Good. You'll be coming with me to see Mr. Edgar." Homelander turns his blue eyes back up to the lit up floor numbers that were beginning to descend. With his attention away from her, Ashley stealthily rips out a few strands of her hair. The pain was soothing, aiding in faking her calm.

The air was suffocating with just the two of them. She thinks back to the phone call she'd received an hour before you and Homelander had arrived at the Tower. Stan Edgar personally warned her of what Homelander was doing. That he'd discovered not only a son but a sister too. Edgar, in the most polite way possible, instructed her not to get involved and just do whatever he told her to do. And absolutely no asking questions about you. Homelander was already pissed about so much being kept from him, best not to antagonize him further. Keeping him happy was top priority.

Unaware of the shit show that was unraveling, worker bees greet them with a smile once they arrive on the 82nd floor. A few even wave at Ashley.

Stan Edgar saw them coming the moment they stepped out of the elevator. Already he was on his feet and moving around his desk to greet them as his office door is opened. Homelander's hand poised at the back of Ashley's neck, he nudges her inside. Homelander motions for both of them to sit down as if it were his own office. His gaze doesn't waver, staring down an equally defiant Edgar. A normal human but he never squirmed in front of Homelander's penetrating stare. He'd commend the older man for his bravery. If only Ashley would take notes. She needed a better poker face if she's to make it in Vought Industries.

"You know why I'm here."

"Your sister and Ryan." Verifies Edgar. He'd prefer to stand but inch by inch sank himself down onto the cushion of his desk chair.

"Now, while Ryan may be under Becca's care, my sister is an adult and wishes to stay here. Train to be an elite hero. Like me. However," neither like the way he breathed out that single word "no one can know that we're related. People will scream nepotism and claim she's getting special treatment."

His reasoning was plausible but. . .

From a promotional point of view, a sibling duo would be a hit like the TNT Twins. The public would eat it up and show even more support for Vought in the polls.

"Oh, and her parents need to sign one of those NDA things. Can't have them flapping their mouth either." Tacking on as an after thought. You'd forget them soon enough. He'd just have to keep them away from you for the time being. They hovered over her too much for his liking. From the corner of his eye, he caught a quiver in Ashley's mask.

About to reprimand her, Edgar clears his throat and leans forward to allow his elbows to rest on the desk's surface." I understand. It will be done. But you do realize how difficult it would be to keep it under wraps considering the outstanding similarities. The powers, your eyes. People will start to ask questions."

"Let them ask away. As long as Vought says she's not my sister, then she's not my sister."

Why was he so intent on covering this one particular fact? Nepotism surely could explain it. Homelander's insistence of it concerns Edgar and Ashley who felt like he was planning something more nefarious for you. He was capable of any horrendous acts they could conjure. They were just as helpless when it came to him. Unable to defy his orders unless they desired him to burn holes into their faces as he did to Madelyn.

All of his whims taken care of, Homelander leaves them to start working on the welcome dinner with you and the rest of the Seven. He wants to show you off. He'd make sure you never wanted to leave him. Ensure that you continue to see him as all powerful and benevolent. The looks of admiration you'd shot him went straight to his head as well as other regions that were out of his control. Clear that you idolized America's favorite hero. Your parents raised you to believe that Vought was a company that cared about helping the public and that their heroes were there to protect and serve the general masses. No doubt in your mind that they were the good guys and the stuff on the media was simply baseless slander. What child would want to discover that their daddy was actually a bad guy working for the power hungry company and that supes were not in fact a gift from god. They were manmade. That knowledge would ruin your world.

Homelander would not allow that. You were his to protect now. His to blind and deafen to the world around them.

[oleander-nin]

Hi can I please yandere Leo from Rise who’s practicing his odachi portal skills only to see portal himself to his number one fan from another universe who enjoys watching Rottmnt

But what if Leo starts getting jealous when reader starts watching other tmnt shows from 2012 to 2003 versions and he caughts reader fawning over them👀

I’m fine with romantic or platonic or mix between both (gotta love slow burns ~)

If you wanna go dark you can do , I’m a big fan of your work (if you ever write a book make sure to tell us I love to buy it )

hope your doing ok ^-^

Number One(Yandere ROTTMNT Leo x Reader)

A/N, not important: Hi! Sorry for the wait, this one really stumped me(I struggled getting the transitions right and making it seem feasible.) It was kinda hard to make this one Yan, but I hope I delivered. I tried to make it clear this is an older Leo, but don't know how well I achieved that. In any case, this is set a couple years after the movie. Also uh, I wrote this in third person. Sorry. Any criticism is welcome, constructive or not. This is supposed to be a gender neutral reader, so if I screwed up somewhere, please tell me.

-Ollie

CW: Kidnapping, yandere themes

Words: 1767

Summary: If you're going to claim you're his number one fan, you should actually be his number one fan.

Leo was so confident in this portal. The ninpō felt like it was flowing through his veins, an energy that was part of him instead of one he was just borrowing. He was so confident in this portal that he didn’t even hesitate before falling through, fully expecting his brothers to be on the other side. He was so confident in this portal that he didn’t even notice the color of his portal wasn’t it’s normal blue, or the weird zapping pulling at his skin as he crossed through. He was so confident in this portal that he didn’t even realize his mistake until he heard the scream.

A room he didn’t recognize surrounded him, somewhere that was very much not Hueso’s restaurant. The couch and the setup took him back, the carpet under his feet making him itch slightly. He stands frozen, his eyes locked with someone of similar age across from him, their eyes wide and mouth agape. He briefly registered the TV playing in the background, some brightly colored cartoon. It seemed like something he and his brothers would enjoy. Leo falters, something he wasn’t sure he’d ever truly done. Something he hated to admit happened. The face of the human, scared and stiff, made him worried. He briefly tries to summon his ninpō, taking a reflexive step back as he feels the power course through him then die back out.

“Leo?” The stranger stammers out, causing Leo to double take. This person who he was certain he’d never seen before(although, admittedly, he didn’t always remember a face) knew his name. A human that wasn’t April knew his name. Leo tries to call upon his ninpō in an attempt to leave again, only to be met with nothing.

Leo lifts his swords, pointing it in their general direction. He didn’t think they were much of a threat, their body pressed against the wall of the room like a force was keeping them there. He briefly noticed their lack of true fear, their face more shocked than scared. He wasn’t sure what to make of that.

“How do you know my name?” Leo demands, his voice loud and more upset-sounding than he intended. He didn’t want to seem bothered, especially in front of an unknown entity. Were they with the foot? Big Mama?

They wordlessly point towards their television, his gaze reluctantly tearing from them towards the show they had playing. He keeps his stance defensive and his swords pointed at them as he truly takes what’s on the screen into account. It was him and his brothers, taped together in that big ball Raph insisted would make them bond. He watches for a moment, mesmerized. He remembers that day, the video playing lining up perfectly with what happened in his head. It scared him, almost. He turns back to the stranger, puffing up slightly to look bigger and more confident.

“Where did you get the video?” He demands. The way it was filmed made it seem like there were cameras everywhere. He knew Donnie recorded everything, but would he really go so far as to spread around the footage? To take multiple angle shots and film each brother individually? Leo didn’t want to believe it, but he really wouldn’t put it past the softshell.

“Netflix?” They say weakly, their head shrinking back between their shoulders. Leo considers this, frowning. He doesn’t lower his weapons in any capacity, but he doesn’t keep as close an eye on them. He watches the screen for a bit, taking in the bright colors of his home and his brothers faces, watching their adventures of the past. It was jarring to see the things they’ve done from the outside, their faces so much younger looking than he remembered.

He looks back at the stranger, taking a deep breath. Maybe they were lying, yes, but this was all he had to go off. Maybe he could get home soon, and let Donnie work his brain around this. There was no reason for Leo to worry. “Where am I?”

The stranger blubbers out something quickly, an address he’s saving in the back of his mind for later. Leo looks around the room more thoroughly, quietly scanning for the telltale signs of cameras or audio devices. If this was some experiment, he did not want to be part of it.

“So,” Leo starts, gesturing at them with the sword. “If I were to believe you, which I don’t, why are you even watching this? Doesn’t it bug you that you’re basically spying on me?”

The stranger huffs slightly. Their back was still pressed against the wall in caution of his sharp katana, but their demeanor had definitely relaxed. “It’s a kids show, man. I watch it to relax. Like how you watch Lou Jitsu stuff.”

Leo stares at them, not liking at all how they’re equating something in his life they shouldn’t even know about to what they’re doing, but he understands the example. He lowers his swords slightly, a bit less apprehensive. Depending on how long it would take to get himself home, he probably shouldn’t threaten the person who’s home he fell in in case he needs to stay.

“How’d you even get here?” They ask, causing Leo to realize he wasn’t even sure how to answer. He had no idea how he ended up here, no explanation other than ‘ancient magic goes haywire once more’.

To save face, Leo just shrugs. He didn’t see a point in explaining, especially because he wasn’t sure how much they actually knew at this point. If they were bad(which he was doubting more and more by the second), he really didn’t want to explain his portals in any sense to them. “Just happened.”

They stare at him for a moment before dropping it, pursing their lips. A long silence follows with their gaze fleeing to everywhere but Leo. He could tell they were trying hard not to stare despite him not returning the same courtesy.

“Do you want something to drink?” They finally ask, the silence broken once more. Leo mulls it over, sheathing his swords. Might as well get comfortable until he figured out how to get back to his world, or his brothers found him.

“What do you have?”

The stranger leads him into the kitchen, their nervous ramblings about the mess in their apartment(he’s seen worse), the lack of options(he’s had less), and the odd way they met(He’s experienced weirder) made him feel much more at ease. By the time he’s seated across from them at their small table with a glass of orange juice in his hand, he’s learned a lot about them. Or, he could at least infer most about their life. Enough to make the bridge between their knowledge of him seem a bit more fair.

“So,” Leo prompts, tapping at the edge of the glass in his hand. Their head pops up at his voice, attention fully on him. It made him feel important, like he was someone admired. I mean, he was, it just wasn’t very often anyone but Casey Jr. did. “What exactly is the show I’m from here?”

Their eyes light up at the question, looking like a small kid who was finally given the chance to show off what they knew. They go into an enthusiastic rhapsody about everything they knew, from the producers, to the start of the show, to the end. They talked endless praise of him and his brothers, seeming to fit in a compliment in every sentence. They even let slip that he was their favorite, the one they watched the most. Leo preens at that, his plastron puffing out in pride. He was their favorite. He had an adoring fan. Maybe this world wasn’t so bad. He lets them continue to ramble on with their take of his word, paying attention whenever they mention his or his brothers skills. While it was still worrisome that this no-longer-complete-stranger knew so much about him and his family, he couldn’t help but feel a bit flattered. He wasn’t sure if it was his ego talking or just the opportunity to finally speak with another human, but he wasn’t so sure he wanted to leave as fast anymore. This was nice. Normal even, or as normal as he can get. He was treated like a celebrity, like someone important. If he could, he’d get drunk off this feeling.

His attention perks up again when his new companion starts to mention others. Personalities that were not matching up with his brothers. Leo purses his lips, pausing them mid-rave about a ‘TMNT 2012’.

“Back up, what do you mean there’s more?” Leo asks, furrowing the edges of his mask as the muscles of his eyebrows crease together.

They laugh nervously, mumbling apologies for, “getting ahead of myself.” Leo waves it off, still waiting for them to expand on what they were saying. Instead of speaking, they turn to their phone and type something in, showing their screen to him a moment later. Four turtle faces stared back at him, each with the same color-coded masks as he and his brothers, but looking incredibly different. Leo crinkles his face, unhappy. “And these are?” 

“You! And your brothers. From a different reality. Or dimension. I’m not all that sure,” They chirp, starting to go into another ramble. Leo hides his grimace, not liking how enthusiastic you were about the similar but very much not the same group of mutant turtles. Their eyes lit up just as much when talking about this Leo, causing his earlier pride to muddle into a hot jealousy. Leo could feel his ninpō spark up under his skin once more, whatever stump he was in being over. Leo’s eyes light up slightly, a smile coming more easily to his face.

“Hey,” He says, interrupting their rambles. Their eyes darted to his again instead of looking all around like they did when they were talking. It was nice to have the attention back, attention he wasn’t so sure he was ready to give up so easily. “Want to come back to my world?”

The way their eyes lit up made Leo know this would be easy, his skin snapping with the familiar buzz of his magic, stronger and more familiar than ever before. He takes their hand and leads them closer, falling backwards into a portal he knew was heading back home.

They didn’t have to know they weren’t coming back. After all, he was their favorite. They’d learn to forgive him, he was sure of it.

Tag list: @f1oricide @itsyagurlchip @lordfreg @acutiewithagun @rottmnttmnt2012 @lixnininotnay @lexiechr @ssak-i @rottmntsimp

[jolapeno]

v. you make me feel wild

javier peña x f!reader | chapter five of late night texts

summary: It's the year 2000. Javi is minding his own business on the porch of his pop's ranch when a text from an unknown number vibrates his phone. The only problem is, no one knows he has a phone and no one has his number.

chapter warnings: fluff. flirting. continuous romcom vibes. an: it's happening. everyone stay calm. also, we have a new header ;) wordcount: 2.2k.

text key: bold is you/reader | italics is javi

Woke up this morning and remembered that we’re going to meet

I may have also woke up smiling

On a scale of Javi smiles was it bigger than the one when we destressed one another?

bigger you flirt

I’ve learnt from you. Never used to be like this. I was innocent before talking to you.

somehow baby I doubt that

We can argue about it later if you want? When I kick your ass at the crossword.

cant wait. try not to let those assholes get you down

I’m on my best behaviour this week. Need them to not revoke going to Houston.

oh any special reason

Not really.

ouch baby

Ask silly questions, win silly prizes.

im going to houston too

Oh are you? Any special reason?

gonna meet this beautiful woman who is an outrageous flirt

Great now I'm blushing.

you make it so easy

I have to go, the meeting is beginning, I'm sorry. Speak later, baby xx

Pop doesn’t bring it up, even if he knows. He waits—like dads do.

Forcing Javi to bring it up, all awkward—sweat pebbling around his neck, lower spine and brow. Not helped by the sun beating down on them, having to shout parts over the occasional animal grunt heard over their discussion as they repair the barn door.

Lately, his Pop leaves him to do bits like this alone. But he’s been hovering. More since the phone calls began and a level above that since he walked in on him the other night.

He stews in it. Allows it to thicken before he really brings it up—unsure whether to come out with it or skate around it. The two of them have gotten out of practice when it comes to sharing.

Javi is more used to lying to save face than being honest.

A hazard of his old job, he supposed. A mask he applied so his old man didn’t worry. Now, with those same occupational worries gone, Javi still finds it hard to let people in. Truly in. Not wanting to discuss Colombia, discuss Cali or Escobar.

It all adds to a pile of things the two Peñas don't talk about.

This wasn’t even bad news. It was good. Precisely what everyone wanted—including him—yet the words still seem to ball up in his throat. Rounding off, becoming a lump that sits.

Making it hard to breathe as he lifts a piece of wood; making it hard to twist when he moves to grab the hammer.

So much so, the words eventually just burst out of him. More like a confession than anything else.

“—that must have been real embarrassing for you.”

He can hear you stifling a laugh. His verbal reenactment of the conversation in the field with his Pop having tickled you.

“You’re an awful person,” he says, twisting the cord around his finger, smirking.

“If you feel that way, baby. We can always not meet.”

“Don’t you fucking dare. We’re meeting,” he says, coating his words in playfulness, even if there's a serious undertone remaining.

Turning on the spot, he leans against the wall. Finger looping more of the cord—hearing you lightly laugh.

“What... what is the plan, anyway?”

You hum, and he hears you shifting. Likely getting comfortable or reaching for something.

He’s learnt that often when he calls, you’re on your sofa—a blanket, sometimes over your lap. You like to be cosy, even if it's a warm day.

Other times you’re in your room, sitting on the bed—or under the sheets. It depends entirely on how warm you are, and how you’re feeling.

“Well, work will pay for my hotel for my two-night stay, and then if we, y'know, wanted to stay, I’ll just need to sort a room out for after.”

“How long have you managed to book off?”

It comes out shaky, more than he means it to.

Some of the finer details of your two’s meet left simmering in the centre of your usual conversations.

Both of you are evidently too afraid to ask.

“I’ll have managed to book off the week. Two days, including the day I land, for work and then the rest—if you're not a weirdo—can be with you.”

Grinning, he leans his head back, resting it against the wall. “Bit late now for you to be worrying about me being a weirdo, baby. I know the sounds you make when I make you—“

“Javi!”

Smirking, he bites the inside of his cheek. “It sounds good. Tell me the hotel, and I can book a room there.”

He hears it, the relief. The way you let out a breath, it blowing down the phone—making him smile.

“Y-you don’t mind?” 

“You expected me to?” 

Pausing, he hears you shuffle again. Sounding more like you’re on your bed than your sofa. “I mean, no. I guess I wasn’t sure what you’d assume. Cause, while there’s a good chance when I see you, I’ll want to spend every waking moment with you, there’s, y’know…”

Grinning, he curls the phone line around his palm, fingers sliding between parts. “The chance it could be a lot?”

“I just don’t want to fuck this up.” 

He doubts you could.

From what he knows of you, he’s sure of it.

But, he also isn’t quite ready to confess he’s already pretty head over heels for you. That he is without seeing your face, knowing how tall you are—whether you have dimples or not, whether you smile with your lips or your entire face. 

“How’re you gonna fuck this up, baby?” 

You go silent, wondering if that’s the point you’ve shrugged to no one but your apartment. 

“I’ve heard I’m a lot,” you say quietly. 

Something snaps in him, a fracture running through him. “That’s alright. Steve told me I’m an asshole.”

“You’re not an asshole—“

“And I promise you’re not a lot. If anything, you could actually talk more to me.”

“Shut up, I talk loads.” 

He smiles, biting the inside of his cheek as he sighs. “I'm excited to see you.” 

“Me too.” 

Moving closer to the wall, he swallows, looking at the chipped tile in his kitchen. “You’re not gonna fuck this up, baby.”

“Yeah?”

“Promise. Let me book the room for the same amount of days as you, and then we can take it from there,” he says.

Struggling to hide his smile as you excitedly tell him you'll go grab your hotel details. More so when he's sure he heard you trip over something.

Are we going to do this when we meet?

you want to still do the crossword together

Yeah! We can find a place to pick up the paper if you want?

id like that

Good! Now, hit me with the next one so I can get some sleep so I can see you quicker.

got me blushing baby

7th word is d from ciders and clue is replacing, nine

Insteadof. This one is easy.

yeah im beginning to see that

Maybe we’re getting good at it?

let’s put it to the test, self-confidence six

Okay that one did take me a second but it’s aplomb.

you amaze me

Thank you. I think I should try and get some sleep, don’t want to look half-dead when I see you.

I doubt you ever could

I can’t believe I’m going to see the face that matches that suave voice.

suave ay. cant wait to see how pretty your smile is

You’re making me blush again.

tomorrow ill get to see it in person

You will. Goodnight, baby.

If I wasn’t meeting you it would be criminal being up this early.

Actually, it isn't even early. It is still night.

morning to you to baby I’m about to get on the road

Ok, I'm going to make myself the largest coffee.

Also if you’re not there after half an hour I’ll just head to the hotel.

hermosa I’m picking you up 

I know but just in case, least you know I won’t be standing around. 

you won’t be because I’ll be there 

Javi, this way you have options to take one look at me and drive the other way. 

I won’t do that 

I’m just giving options and in case there is traffic 

hermosa, im not going to stand you up

Okay, can’t blame a girl for wanting to help.

you can help me by getting your ass to the airport

Getting bossy, are we? I like it.

fuck baby you cant say things like that to me when i need to leave

Just something to think about on your long drive. Please drive safe, baby. See you soon.

see you in several hours

Javi is surprised at how smooth the drive is.

He watches the sun rise up as the miles tick on, sliding his aviators from his shirt to up on his nose. He finds a surprising road stop that serves not-bad coffee.

The kind that doesn’t leave that cheap tinge on his tongue or bitterly sitting in the back of his throat.

He doesn’t feel nervous, either.

And on top of that, he finds a parking spot at the airport with ease.

In a way, he worries it’s too good to be true. That such smoothness now means a rocky hill later.

That’s when the nerves kick in. It sitting, fluttering in his stomach—at first, all little wings and then all of a sudden something larger.

Shifting the parking brake into place, he turns the key to silence the car. His pulse creates a beat—steady, almost orchestral—as he glances up at the sea of people stepping out of the airport. 

This is it.

He’s been trying not to picture you—attempting not to turn shapes into something solid. Javi wants the experience when his eyes land on you, as though his world is in black and white, and then he’ll see colour.

It’s what he hopes.

A part, small but insistent, keeps chipping away at him, reminding him to plan for the worst. To have a backup plan—a way out.

Picking up his phone, he stares at the blank screen. Somewhat reassured that you hadn’t either texted that you’d arrived earlier—or worse, you’d changed your mind.

Lifting his chin, sliding his palm over his jeans, he takes a breath—deep, heavy, the kind that expands his chest until it can’t anymore.

You should have landed by now.

His eyes glance at the time on his watch as he takes another breath. Checking down at his shirt, making sure for the hundredth time he hadn’t spilt coffee—ensuring dark brown hadn’t stained pink.

It’s what you had asked for.

How will I know it’s you? youll know Because you’re oh so handsome? yes that and ill wear bright pink For me? You spoil me.

Running his tongue over the front of his teeth, he brushes his palm over his face.

It’s only then that he allows his eyes to flick from face to face, worry creeping in. It trying to merge with the happiness he’s been stifling on the drive. Scanning and scanning, glancing and glancing—

Then, in a worn denim jacket, legs out, dragging a battered suitcase behind, he sees you.

Or who he hopes is you.

If it is, you look nervous. It makes you stand out from the crowd of bustling people around you, as they struggle to get past you, and you struggle to force it behind a smile or banish it from your cheeks.

Even from here, it pulsates. You finding it more difficult as shaky hands pull out something from your pocket, unfolding it, before he sees the most ridiculous hand-drawn sign in between your fingers.

It’s definitely you. 

You who has scratched Javi P onto a piece of paper, all accompanied by a worried expression on your face as you shift from leg to leg. 

Javi isn’t sure why you made the sign. You didn’t need it.

Somehow, against all logic and odds, he knew it was you. His arm shoving the car door wide as he exits, not looking back to check it slams into place as he crosses to you, watching, waiting with his heart in his throat for your eyes to land on him. 

And when they do. 

It’s an eclipse. 

It hits your eyes first, making them gleam like a beacon guiding him home. Then it reaches your cheeks, lips sliding up, teeth showing as you lower the sign, staring at him as he moves closer, forgetting all the others around the two of you.

As though a single soul has never even existed outside the two of you.

It’s just him and you.

Coming to a stop in front of you, he lets himself stare you up and down—voice and texts stitching themselves to the face he now sees. 

Flexing his fingers at his side, Javi watches you slowly lick your lips as his heart slides back into its rightful place. The nerves slowly stop fluttering, and his mind begins to catch back up with him.

And the only thought that remains is: You're beautiful.

More than his mind could ever conjure or create.

“Hi,” you say.

And it falls like glitter from your lips to his ears. 

His lips are unable to relax from their grin, spreading wider, cheeks aching as he fights running his knuckles against your cheek. “Hi.”

an: if this was a sitcom, this would be my season finale... but alas it isn’t, so you only have to wait a week for them to be hanging out *wink, wink*

✨ also, check out this really cool moodboard a beautiful soul made for LNT for the birthday bash

next chapter ->

[noneorother]

There's a *puppet* show going on in the magic shop, and it looks awfully familiar...

(Insert unhealthy number of rewatches here) The magic shop in S2 is a real jewel box. There's so much symbolism and so many easter eggs, it starts to make your head spin. But I found something really weird going on with the puppets (or should I say angels) in the background...

Here's 1941 : you can see on the left what looks like closed red curtains, and a coatrack with puppets behind Crowley here.

Where am I going with this? Well, don't those puppets look familiar?

For my money, they really look like silly versions of Crowley and Aziraphale, with a few other familiar puppets hiding on the other side of the rack.

Now here's that exact same shot in the present. The red curtain falls away to reveal: An extremely symmetrical arrangement of truly weird puppets. The puppet in the glass case near the back is the same.*

It probably just looks like a creepy display, with our familiar Aziraphale and Crowley puppets, until I do this:

To me at least, this arrangement really looks like a depiction of a synaxis of the hosts of bodiless powers (i.e. angels) before Jesus. If you study European art history, you can't escape medieval religious iconography. It's kind of a big deal. I've put this example of Mary flanked by the nine ranks of Angels from a Cathedral in Exeter above, but you can find 100 examples of this kind of eerily symmetrical and hierarchical ranking of angels with god, Jesus, Mary etc... Before I break it down, you have to know that in the medieval period, and especially in religious art and iconography, the relative size and position of figures is WAY more important than realism or accuracy.

Obviously the costumes don't match one to one, but you get enough of a vibe that once you start seeing it you can't UNSEE it. The relationships of position and size here are fascinating to me. For one, what the hell are two Crowleys doing in a host arrangement in present day? He's not even an angel. In the second row we have archangels Gabriel, the flopsy twins Uriel and Michael, and a slightly larger Saraqael head in the center. Is Saraqael actually more important here? Technically Jim is still an archangel, so he gets the mirror of the Gabriel position, but as a sad clown wearing a tartan blanket. We also have two tiny dolls (not puppets) with star name tags, one keeled over wearing brown, and one sitting up and smiling, wearing blue. I've named them tentatively Adam & Jesus for now, because that's the vibe I'm getting, but who knows. Here's the usual position of the Jesus in a synaxis for comparison.

In the lowest row, we bizarrely have arguably the most powerful angel, The Metatron (shown here with a dark floppy overcoat hiding the fact the doll has no body) and what I can only imagine is Maggie with blonde hair and blue eyes? What? Now, the doll I'm calling God in the middle for the large size, and the fact their head is always cut off above the framing in the shot. God is clearly looming large over the rest of the host, but is in a lower hierarchy (with Muriel, Crowley & Aziraphale being fairly low ranking at this point in the show) and also has NO HANDS, a clown face and BLOOD SMEARS on their overalls. Yikes. If you take a look at the top-down shot of the dolls, you can see how they had to completely redo the god-doll's hair. This is a specific vintage English doll called "Bimbo the clown". You can see the original hair always has a fringe, and the yarn locks are usually much bigger. Compare with the new hair in the top view of the present-day shop.

Hey. Does that hair style look familiar to anyone?

Look. I don't want to go claiming something THIS insane from one doll's hairstyle in a background shot. I'm not trying to convince you this is irrefutable proof that there's some sort of storyline where Nina is actually God. But it's interesting they took the trouble to re-make the doll's hair (and costume) to look like Nina's, even when it is almost never seen, much less noticed. The fact that the god-doll is also a clown got me thinking of the Gabriel and Jim dolls, and that maybe there's another doll in the shop that should double with Bimbo? *Here's the only other doll with a name card in the magic shop in either time, the one in the glass case :

Even though we barely see it, we can tell it's wearing the same outfit as the 1941 magician. Why? If this one is the equivalent of the real god, and not the sad clown version, and if it's locked up in a box somewhere, unable to free themselves, is that why we haven't heard from them in season 2....? So many questions. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Thanks to @kimberleyjean and @embracing-the-ineffable for additional pictures.

[dice-sociation]

AP Review: Reckless Attack - Main Campaign

Listen Here: https://www.recklessattack.com/episodes/

Quick info:

Audio Quality: High Quality and Edited, Effects, Music. Vibes: Lord of the Rings, Ghibli, Never Ending Story, Avatar the Last Airbender, Frogs Extras: Discord and Patreon rewards. System: 5e DnD Average Episode time: 1 hour Uploads 1 Episode per week. Campaign/ Show Length: Long Term Campaign Platforms: Podcast, Audio Only. Accessibility: Content Warnings Language available: English Diversity: AAPI/BIPOC Number of Episodes Review is based on: 100 (This is my first review so I decided to start with a Podcast I’m already caught up on) ** If you want the TLDR, scroll to the bottom of the post **

Why Reckless Attack?

I honestly believe that part of the draw of listening to people play a TTRPG is not just the story telling but an assurance that adults can somehow actually and consistently come together, in person, to pull off a full long term game. Reckless Attack is one such podcast. They are a small indie podcast with excellent audio quality and editing. 

But, why should you listen to another high fantasy podcast? Well, have you ever wanted to see what a post-apocalyptic High Fantasy world would look like? The deeper you delve into Reckless Attack, the deeper the lore gets, and we have barely scratched the surface a hundred episodes in. You’ll join the players as they explore a world recovering from an apocalyptic event, ripe with magic and unstable artifacts, an undead army, and frogs.

Starting The Pod

Right out the gate, the listeners are greeted by a Lord of the Rings style opening monologue, giving relevant history and context to the kind of place the characters live in. I personally get the feeling a lot of the world was established in a previous game or between the DM and players prior to the start of this campaign. If, as a listener, it feels like you're missing something, don't worry; you'll get a lot more context down the road, especially once the players make it to the city of Agmar (Episode 15). The first 15 episodes are a nice slow build up. 

Conveniently, the first recap episode covers Episode 1-14! (Though I really enjoyed the first 14 episodes, I know not everyone has the amount of listening time I have). If you are so inclined to start from the first episode, you'll get nicely eased into the characters and their relationships with one another before a lot of the bigger world building really starts to soar.

(My one caveat is that I listen to this podcast at 1.3-1.4 speed since the players and Nathan speak with a good amount of pauses, and that can be a little too slow for me.)

About the Team

Nathan, the DM for the main campaign, paints some amazing pictures of his homebrew world. He has a real talent for creating larger than life NPCs and Big Baddies for his players to interact with. They all have clear motivations, flaws, and personalities that truly rounds out the overall story. When it comes to plot, Nathan kept me on my toes with plot twists that would literally snap me out of whatever multitasking I was doing. And I must recognize how often Nathan opens the floor for the players to build parts of the story and describe longer stretches of downtime. Those moments are like the equivalent of cinematic montages to represent the passing of time.

The players, Sophie, Steve, David, and Jonathan, deliver wonderful descriptions and leave plenty of space for each other to speak, balanced with just the right amount of crosstalk. Each character has a very unique voice which is helpful for listeners (especially because David and Jonathan are twins and have similar voices).

Sophie plays Valeska Carter, the Human * Cleric. "Valeska is a young woman in search of answers. Like, compulsively."* I quickly fell in love with Val, an exhausted nerd who can never have enough notes and organization. If you're the kind of person who is always rescuing animals, you will love her too. 

Steve plays Selv Asterlin, the Dragonborn Monk. "Selv’s years at his town’s icy mountain monastery has trained not just his body, but also his mind and emotions. The large dragonborn seeks to be a peacemaker in conflicts, exuding strength, calm and serenity while straying away from violence and lethal force when possible."* But don't be fooled, Selv is often one for the occasional good prank, and I always appreciate Steve's references even when the rest of the group don't understand them. (I got you Steve) 

David plays Kascorin "Kass" Brightmane, the Dwarven Warlock. "Tomorrow (Kass leaves) this city for the Golden Tree adventuring guild, and in leaving this city, (He leaves his) friends, (his) family, and (his) comfortable life behind."* Kass is very grounded, serious, and focused, until he runs into tasty dried meats. Kass has all the charm of a warlock and the grit of a soldier. 

Jonathan plays Checkers, the Gung Druid, with his trusty pals Mango and Junior. "Joining the Golden Tree adventuring guild on a dare, Checkers and his frog pal Mango are here to prove that it’s better to find your own path than to follow someone else’s. After all, where’s the fun in looking before you leap?"* Checkers is a lot like the characters I personally play. Someone who doesn't stand around for too much planning and prefers to "leap" into action. In my very humble opinion, every group needs an instigator. 

I have also come to really admire the level of trust and respect the group has for one another. They handle both wonderful whimsical beats as well as solemn moments with great care (Episode 108 was magnificent.)

*Quoted from the official Reckless Attack website. You can find this and more at their website www.recklessattack.com. (Be aware, reading the available character sheets may contain spoilers)

About the World

Ryxia is built on a world where long ago, the Gods walked among mortals, but one day they left. As if in consequence, magic in this world seems to ebb and flow, and monsters roam the wilds. Until, the "second of Ryxia’s twin suns disappeared from the sky, the Ultragiants appeared, and the Pentarchy’s great capital city of Narhasur was turned into a smoldering crater." *

You can think of the Ultra Giants as the Titans of this world, being elemental and colossal. These Ultra Giants terrorized mortals until one day, the mortals managed to kill one " wielding their city’s Object of Focus… The object was destroyed, as was much of the army. But strangely, within days, the Ultragiants no longer stalked Ryxia."*

As the mortals re-emerged, they started to rebuild despite the incredible amount of monsters who now roam the lands. 

*Quoted from the official Reckless Attack website. You can find this and more at their website www.recklessattack.com. (Be aware, reading the available character sheets may contain spoilers)

Extras

Aside from the main campaign Nathan has his own series called Reckless A-Talk. This series Nathan or others on the team interview incredible people from all over the TTRPG space. Nathan's style of interviewing is mostly allowing his guest to speak more than he does, followed by the wonderful lightning round questions. I highly recommend listening to these (as a little treat) if you are interested in learning other perspectives and other aspects of the industry. 

Bonus one shots are another part of Reckless Attack, allowing the players to take the reigns.  They serve as fun filler for when you just can't wait for the next episode to drop. 

And if that's still not enough content for you, you can always subscribe to their Patreon for even more content, including the very relaxed Reckless A-Snack.

TLDR

High Fantasy world rebuilding the world after mortals were nearly wiped out.

Listeners will get a good feel of the world within the first 14 episodes. (IMO, the pacing starts to pick up after Episode 14)

Here are "Tale Til Now," recap episodes for those who want to catch up faster. (Episodes 1-14, 14-42, 42-66, 67-84)

Non Player Characters are larger than life, with clear motives and personalities.

The Dungeon Master and Players share a lot of world building and you can feel the love and trust they have for each other.

Recommended listening at 1.3x-1.5x speed if you are one of those people (you know who you are).

Find more details about the world and characters at www.recklessattack.com.

Lots of extra content for those who just need more, including; interviews, one-shots run by the players, and patreon bonus content. https://www.patreon.com/recklessattack/home

Do you have ideas or suggestions? Please feel free to comment!

Special thanks to Artax of Who's Taking Watch for helping with editing!

No Context Spoilers:

[lmskitty]

Here's have some Satosugu family stupidity. This is mostly just humour/crack fic because I needed a little break today. Hope you enjoy!

5 conversations Megumi Fushiguro overheard that he wished he hadn't.

Megumi Fushiguro loves his family, friends and boyfriend. He also hates all of them and thinks they should be the ones to pay for his therapy. Here are the things he has been made to hear with his own two ears over the course of one week.

1. The Todo Incident.

Todo mimed rudely with his right hand, his left hand holding his soft drink.

“Bro seriously if you sit on your hand it totally feels like it's a different person. Granted you should do both hands if you want the full package involved though.”

Yuji sighed “Number 1 no it doesn't, 2 stop telling me these things and 3 I don't even need this information!!” He hissed, pulling Todo’s arm down to stop him making the gesture.

Todo stared at him and then at Megumi and then erupted into applause wiping his eyes and hugging his friend, telling him how proud of him he was. He put his hand on Megumi's shoulder and congratulated him on his willpower and relationship, remarking that he had seen what his brother was working with and Megumi was truly strong in spirit for taking on that challenge. Megumi bent his finger back nearly breaking it and told him to never speak to him nor touch him again if he wanted to keep the other fingers.

2. The downfalls of understanding Riceball language.

Toge sat beside Yuta and leant his head on his shoulder before looking up at him, a gentle smile on his face.

Yuta smiled back. “I missed this. It's nice getting to hang out together in person again isn't it?”

Toge: Salmon, salmon, tuna mayo. (It was nicer getting to spend the morning in bed together with your dick in my throat)

Yuta coughed turning red. Megumi stared off to the side pretending he hadn't understood that.

Yuji stared at all of them. “Aw man did Toge say something funny again? I gotta get my head around that speech of his, it's so cool.

Megumi shook his head.

3. Not even safe at home.

Gojo walked into the kitchen and took his shirt off sitting next to his husband.

“Baby you are not gonna BELIEVE the size of the spot on my back”

Geto put his book down looking interested “bigger than the one on your thigh the other day?”

Gojo nodded "for sure!” He sat facing away from his partner. “Go slow though please it's gonna sting like a bitch I just know it”

Geto sighed and squeezed at his back and popped it. He showed Gojo how much was on his finger.

“Woah there was so much!” Geto said.

“Told you!” Gojo said. “Ooooh you know I'm kind of in a mood to be pampered, think you can do my eyebrows later, like tweezing them?” Gojo said, leaning his head back onto his partner's lap.

Geto smiled “Ok baby, and wanna do face masks like last time?”

Gojo nodded and clapped his hands together happily.

Megumi shut the fridge door behind them.

“Sometimes I think it would be less gay if I walked in on you two actually fucking” he said and took his coke upstairs.

“Oh go kiss your boyfriend you homophobe!” Gojo yelled after him, Geto laughed.

4. Girl talk

“No lube, no protection, all night all day, from the kitchen floor to the toilet seat, from the dining table to the church, from the front porch to the balcony, vertically, horizontally, quadratic, while i gasp for air and scream the lord’s prayer, he can have me!!!!” Nanako wailed at the TV lying on the floor pretending to claw at the screen watching the new Jungkook video again for the 15th time.

“He is pretty cute,” Tsumiki smiled.

“He could spit on my face and I'd thank him,” Mimiko sighed.

Megumi looked down at his salad and threw it in the bin deciding to only visit the kitchen when he was sure no one else was there.

5. Couples counselling

“Look I get it, I know you have an image to maintain but can we please just talk about it” Nobara said following Maki who sighed and stood up ahead.

“No, can we please just drop it”

“It's ok to be embarrassed but honestly I think it's really cute you're always the little spoon! I'm sorry I called myself your jetpack!”

“Panda is never gonna let me live this down,” Maki said. “And you can stop smirking too!” She yelled pointing her staff at Megumi who raised his hands and backed away going down the other way through the corridor.

[anon-sect]

Request made by @inanimatetffantasies

Corey was going to a big time celebrity meet and greet convention. Among some of the celebrities was his favorite, Neil Ellice. He had seen him as his SOAP character and in several movies and TV shows. This would be his first time actually seeing the actor in person. He was so excited.

After registering at the convention, he made his way to the large room that had a panel of celebrities waiting to go on stage. There were lots of fans in the room chatting and taking their seats. He noticed a table that many were going to before finding a seat to sit down. He went and saw that it was a contest. One lucky person in the room would get to have a private chat with one of the celebrities on stage at the end of the one hour session. Corey noticed one of the chairs was for Neil Ellice. He grabbed a card and wrote his name down along with the celebrity of his choice. He pulled off a small tab from the card that had the number 67 typed on it. On the top left of the card also had the number 67 on it. He figured that was how they would let the audience know who won the contest. He placed the card in the box provided and went to find a seat.

Corey watched as each celebrity was called on stage one at a time. Each celebrity were asked several questions by their fans in the audience. The hour went by fast for some, but not for Corey. He was hoping his number would be called. At the end of the session, the host took to the microphone and announced that it was time for one lucky winner to have the opportunity to have a one on one chat with the celebrity of their choice. Corey watched as everyone who entered the contest pulled out their numbers. There was a drumroll as all waited in anticipation. Finally, the host pulled out a card from the box and spoke number 67. "Whoever is number 67, your celebrity of choice will meet you in the private room behind the stage. The next session starts in two hours, enjoy the convention fellow fans." The host finished as everyone was dismissed to set up for the next session.

Corey made his way to the back and was met by security. He showed the security guy his number, and he was ushered to the private rooming the back. He walked in to find Neil sitting comfortably in one of two chairs in the room. Neil stood up to shake hands with him. "You must be Corey. Nice to meet a loyal fan." He spoke, shaking his hand. Corey was so excited to actually be this close, shaking hands, and the fact that Neil called him by name. He sat down in the chair opposite of Neil. There was a small table with two drinks on it between them.

Corey had a ton of questions going through his mind. He didn't know which to ask first. Before he could as his first question, Neil offered the drink to him. He saw Neil pick up the other drink in hand. He drank about half of his in less than 30 seconds. It was really tasty. He let out a slight burp. "Sorry, Mr. Ellice." He apologized for his manners. "It's perfectly fine, and call me Neil. I have a feeling things will get personal real soon." Neil spoke back to him.

Corey was so amazed at this. The fact that Neil asks to call him on a first name basis. The drink was so tasty that he just finished it off. He suddenly had a weird sensation. For a moment, he thought Neil had seemed taller than earlier. He saw him smiling as he took a sip of his own drink. He quickly realized it wasn't his imagination. Neil was getting taller. In fact, everything in the room was getting bigger.

"I know this probably will seem strange and maybe cruel, but I slipt you a shrinking potion that will make you about five inches tall." Neil said, just watching his fan continue to shrink in his chair.

"Why would you shrink me? I am a big fan of yours." Corey asked in confusion as he was now down to a foot and six inches tall and continuing to shrink.

"Every now and then, I like to truly give a fan an experience they won't forget. I shrink them and have fun with them, but don't worry, you won't be tiny forever." Neil answered his question and saw that Corey was finally down to five inches tall. He grabbed up the tiny five inch fan. He took off one of his shoes and placed Corey in it. He then proceeded to put the shoe back on his foot.

Corey didn't know what Neil was going to do with him until he was dropped into the actor's shoe. He started to beg not to be stepped on, but seeing the giant socked foot approaching, he knew that wouldn't help. The giant foot slide in on top of him, crushing him. He thought the actor was going to kill him when he felt his body expand under his foot.

Neil felt the fan expand out like an extra insole under his foot. He moved his foot inside his shoe to make the insole just perfect. After five minutes, he took his shoe off and removed the insole.

Corey found the odor in the actor's shoe bad, but not terrible. Even the sock had a slight odor to it, but not enough to torture him. Just the part of being flattened and used to support Neil's foot was really the worst of it. He thought the actor was going to keep him there forever until he was removed and smelled fresh air. He was placed on the table. He then felt his body inflat and resume solid form again.

"I hope that wasn't too bad for you, my little guy, Corey. I did like feeling you support my foot, though. It was quite nice." Neil spoke to his tiny fan.

Corey thought he really should be upset over this, but somehow wasn't. Yes, the shoe and sock did have an odor, but not as horrible as it could have been. He was only an insole for a brief period. "It wasn't too bad. Seeing how you are one of my favorite actors, it was kind of cool, briefly being an insole under your foot." Corey paused. "One question: How long will I be this size?" He asked back, curious to see if Neil would be true to his word that he wouldn't be stuck this small forever.

"Actually, that depends on you. Well, everyone, I shrink, always return back to normal size after being my insole for five minutes. No one has ever asked to stay tiny forever." Neil spoke to tiny Corey.

Corey could tell that Neil wanted something that no one had ever offered to him. "How do you make me normal size?" He asked, wanted to know the process. "I just drop a few drops of the reverse potion on you, and you will revert back to your normal size. I guess you are ready for that?" Neil responded back, pulling out a small bottle from his pocket. Corey saw the nice actor really wasn't going to keep him small forever. It was only for a little fun. He still could tell Neil wanted something special.

"Can I stay small a bit longer? Well, what I want to know really is do you want a fan for a tiny pet?" Corey asked, curious to see if his hunch was right on the money.

Neil couldn't believe it. A fan had asked just the fantasy he has always wanted, a fan for his own tiny pet. He always wanted one, but no one ever asked to be one. He would never force a fan of his to be his tiny pet. And if one did, he wouldn't be entirely cruel to him. Now, this one fan asked him what he always wanted. "I do, actually, but strictly on volunteering basis. Also, you would be my tiny pet forever. But I won't be entirely evil or cruel to you. A little crushing here and there. Some foot worship on occasions. I would be kind of both a nice giant and slightly cruel, but I still want to have fun with my tiny pet. What do you say? Before you speak, just know it's permanent. If you agree, then this will be your permanent size." Neil waited for Corey to reply back

Corey saw how much the actor really wanted this. He really liked that Neil was giving him the choice to choose freely instead of forcing it on him. He really was a nice giant. Knowing this decision would be forever, he wanted to make Neil happy. "I will be your tiny pet, Master Neil." He spoke to a big smile on Neil's face.

Neil was happy as he put the reverse potion back into his pocket. "Unfortunately, I still have a busy day. So you will have to go back into my shoe, but I promise as soon as I get back to my hotel room, I will take you out. Hope you like pizza, I will have some ready to feed my pet."

Corey begins to think of his life as Neil's pet. Neil picked him up and dropped him in the other shoe. "Once my day is over and we are back at the hotel room, you get to eat pizza and watch TV with me. I like having a fan for a tiny pet." He heard Neil speak as his socked foot entered the shoe. Corey found himself crushed once again. He was flattened and reshaped into a good insole under his Master's foot. He could feel Neil wiggle his toes on top of him. It was a new life as the actor's pet, and he wasn't going to change his mind.

Neil stood up, about to exit the room. His fan turned tiny pet felt good under his foot. He would reward his tiny pet later on in his hotel room. "Where is the fan that visited you?" A security guy asked him as he walked out. "He left earlier. He should be back out there where the other fans are." He spoke as he continued to walk past him. He wiggled his toes over his insole in his shoe. He smiled as no one would know what happened to Corey, but he would be taken care of like a good pet.

[exsqueezememacaroni]

ANSWERS ANSWERS ANSWERS

Preface: Mike's answers were received as an audio recording and I've transcribed them here to the best of my abilities - he reads the questions out loud, which i don't include. He's jovial and snarky AF in his answers, which might fall a little flat in text. "Source's" followup answers were in text and copy-pasted, they're a lot more sincere. I've decided to post all answers in full...you might be surprised by them and you can take them how you like, but don't shoot the delivery person (me) or the messenger (the Source).

Ok, here they are: question, Mike's answer, Source's answer [my commentary]

whens the mexico tour mike? do you hate mexicans mike?

(joking on that last one ofc xd)

There are a lot of tours happening. You're gonna have to be more specific. A better question is: when will my tacos be ready?

I'll expand on this one. He is very close to signing off on a small tour with one of his bands. He is also trying very hard to find a way to reschedule the one he had to cancel, but the logistics is making it hard. He is trying to keep his touring to 3 weeks out max and 2 months home. Which is hard to do with his bigger band.

do you still have toodles the baby doll, the one you had in 92'-93'? do have any other antique items similar to toodles? if so, what are your favorites?

Wait, we need a visual for this story, hold on [Mike and the Source giggle, I don't know what happens here edit: this probably when the toodles/hippo/pig video was recorded]...let's see, what's next...mmm...yeah....nope...pass

He has a few antique items. Like a shrunken skull and a medical amputation kit from the 1700s.

roddy, somewhat recently like a few months ago, in an instagram live did a qna and someone asked him what he thought about trey and he told a story about him having a ball of straight boogers that he collected his boogers in and i just wanna ask if that is true or not because that is a insane story if it actually did happen

....booger ball? HAHA ok...hmmm? Well where do you put your boogers in huh??? Do you eat them? put 'em in your stomach? [Source: "eww"] That ball sounds pretty good about now, right?hahahahh

Mike knows nothing about this. It doesn't sound to me like something Trey would do now. Who knows what he did when he was younger though.

What does Mike think about his fans?

What do i think about my fans....well...if I'm being honest? I question their mental health...HAHA...sorry...I didn't mean to! [Source: "MIKE!"] I kid, I kid....I'm very grateful...to all ten of them....[chuckle]

He is truly grateful for them. Some also scare him a little.

What was the best prank Mike pulled on tour??

....I would ask Crain or Pearson... [Source has a big laugh]

With Dead Cross. He had arranged for the police to pull over their van while touring in Texas. The officer was a fan and Mike had him "plant" drugs and a gun in the car. Dave knew what was happening but Justin and Mike were freaking out. They were handcuffed and laying in the dirt when they found out it was all a joke.

Who has a nicer butt? Mike or Trevor?

Again, you're gonna have to elaborate on that one....I mean, which Mike? I can't POSSIBLY be expected to answer the question without knowing...hahaha

Mike gets my vote. He has a great butt.

Is there a lyric to a song Mike wrote that was so unhinged that he thought it was better to keep to himself?

Ya, the answer is nope.

So many choices, but he doesn't do regrets. I will tell you that the bullshit he spins about his Faith No More lyrics being random and impersonal, is just that. Bullshit. A good number of those lyrics are highly personal. Furthermore, quite a few of these songs when woven together tell a very personal story. You will NEVER get him to admit this though.

What is Mike's sexual orientation?

Hehe - you wanna take that one [source]? [Source: eehhhuuummmmmmmmm....no...no I'm good]

I feel like if I answer this, there will be a lot of disappointed people. I'll just say he had a wife, he has a girlfriend. You do the math.

Were Mike and Trevor ever a thing?

Sure....in his fucking wet dreams....hahahahah

Yes, they were and are “friends” Seriously though, not that I am aware of, and I've known them both since 1989.

Did mike get a BJ from that groupie he talked about in the making of Angel Dust? Or was it all made up just to troll?

[Mike skips over this one]

I'll answer this one. That was a true story. All of it, including the fact that he did NOT take her up on her offer of giving him a BJ. *He would like to add that he often wonders if that was a mistake and he missed out on some "really good head." He is kidding, of course. When he said he doesn't like groupies, he was being sincere. It gives him the "ick”

since it's time to ask anything: how big is Mike's dick?

Shamefully small....you're like Dora the Explorer on the hunt for it. [Source laughs]

I have ZERO complaints [you might guess the Source's relationship to Mike here]

first and foremost, is mike doing ok? i mean, both mentally and physically.. i just hope he got over all the things that were troubling him and is in a good state right now😭

Wow, ya....um....that's really kind [he truly sounds taken aback by the question] I am doing well. And...um.... I thank you for the support, it's appreciated. Truly, I mean that....ok....I'm done....you do the rest, [source]. [recording ends]

He is doing well. He is taking the advice of his care team and limiting his work. Enjoying life. Moving forward you will find his tours are broken into multi-week sessions followed by some downtime, and projects will be less frequent, but hopefully more satisfying.

is mike currently working on some new music/projects/plans to revive some of the old ones? some upcoming collaborations maybe?

Yes. However he told me I could only give you a very basic answer. He is working on something new, but his priority and focus is on fulfilling the tours he had to postpone or cancel over the past few years. Starting with his “slutty” group. [the slutty group is Tomahawk ;) ]

now for the more personal ones… [the previous two and the next two questions were all from the same anon]

those weren't personal?😂oh boy!

Yeah he isn't going to answer these. But I will try.

what is mike's current relationship with trevor? are they on good terms? do they talk/spend time together still? i think we can all agree that there is kind of an elephant in the room right now regarding their recent interactions (i'm very much looking at you trev)

Things are probably the best they've been since high school. They do live on different coasts and both tend to keep busy, so they don't have time to really "hang" out, but that hasn't really been something that they do since high school. They see each other enough over work and yes, they really do enjoy working together. Especially now that they have both matured some.

is mike still… married?? i need to hear the most elaborate answer for this one because his marriage in particular is a real twilight zone haha

Bless you for asking this! Personally, this subject irks me a bit. So I am glad someone asked, as I would love to set the record straight. Yes, he is still technically married, but only for legal reasons. I cannot give you more details as it would violate someones privacy. However; he and Cristina are not together. He likes to be vague about this, as it

is somewhat of a security blanket for him. Now that he has gone public about his demons, you can probably understand why he likes to keep people at an arms length distance. Especially women. Yes they separated and then reconciled. It didn't work out. Having a significant other that is never around can lead to loneliness and other issues, and they just couldn't make it work. Even so, they still remain friends and live a few blocks away from each other. Romantically, that relationship is dead AF. That does not mean that he is "available" though. He isn't. I promise you he is happy. At least he says he is. He is the love of my life.

[I asked about my gifts for Mike from the Southern US Bungle tour, they DID end up on the bus, the anal hook got passed around and somehow ended up with Dave?!??! Mutherfuckr....anyways, I gave the Source the link to where I got it in case she wanted to get another one for Mike. And as for the socks...]

That was very kind of you and he definitely appreciates the thought and creativity put into these gifts. I have definitely seen the socks with blood dripping. I'll look for the ones with the skull. He did mention to me that he's loves all the socks that fans have given

him. So I am sure he has them. As for the anal hook. Thank you for the link. I'm not sure that man needs any more "gadgets" if you catch my drift.

[I apologized for the "is he still married' question...you all know how I feel about that topic...]

It's okay. Like I said, I honestly don't mind answering that one at all.

I don't mind answering any of these. Look, I think he is hot too. I would be a total hypocrite if I didn't understand the fascination. Which is why I encouraged him to answer these. Plus he is so damn guarded. It's good for him to open up. Baby steps. Answering a few questions won't hurt him or change his life.

What turns him on about a woman or man?

I did try to get him to answer this question seriously… I tried. Instead he started describing me. Except for the end when he added and "Big sweaty hairy balls." Obviously I can't answer this for him, but I can tell you what he has told me what he likes about me… at least the PG version. He always tells me his favorite thing about me is my

kindness and big heart and that I accept him unconditionally. I know, probably not what you were expecting. He also tends to be attracted to women who are creative and successful. That is my own observation from the women he has dated. He also loves dark haired and dark eyed women, with a wicked sense or humor. He is also definitely an "ass" man. As for men, I have never heard him honestly mention being attracted to one, other than when he was joking around.

[to me, and I decided to include...] I know you all like to fantasize that he has gay tendencies. So if you prefer to keep this answer quiet I completely understand. But I can assure you, he is not keeping his gay side closeted or anything. We are very open minded as a couple and believe me, if he wanted to experiment. He could have.

What's his favourite fragrance?

Currently it's Burberry Touch. He also likes Montblanc Legend.

[I interject: *me again - actually there's a lot of chat around what fragrance mike wears….people really like

it….if he wants to share the internet would be forever grateful]

I understand. He smells amazing. Scents are a big thing with him.

Is Mike really into the BDSM community or is it all stage acting?

I did say we are a very open minded couple. Plus the man is an Aquarius.

That's that on that, folks. There were a couple of questions that have come in since these, I haven't sent them in yet, hoping to get a few more in so I can send a block of 'em. The Source says we're still welcome to ask, but she can't promise anything more from Mike. I personally want you all to know the interactions I've had with the Source have all been very sweet. It really does sound like she wants Mike to start be more comfortable out there in the world again, and so I want you all to love and support them both with all your bits.

FIN