#and i think a man i dont want to see might be there so its going to be a weird night
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im going to take it one step farther and say If you see someone and you don't like how they look, Ask Why? dont stare or anything but take a moment and examine: why that persons body made you want to be mean to them? what did you assume about that person because of their body? where did that bias come from? is it founded in any data or fact?
i used to be the kind of person who couldn't help but pull a face when i saw evidence of a soft belly through clothing, i also used to be the type of person squinting at any man's chest to see how i compared. and do you know how i stoped painting myself in to that dysphoric corner? i started challenging those thoughts and being mindful of where they were coming from and how they hurt me.
do you want to know what my go-to thing to wear around the safety of my own home is now? fuckin croptops! its hot out, what the fuck do i care if my bathroom mirror sees my stomach? i hurt my back enough at work- im not binding on my day off.
and that freedom of not obsessing about how i feel i might be perceived 24/7, came from practicing radical acceptance of how bodies are, rather than policing how bodies should be.
in the beginning it felt silly and annoying in the beginning to be my own little big "well actually" about body positivity. but the longer ive done it the easier it gets, and now when i see my stretch marks my first thought is "the way the light bounces off that type of skin makes it look like ive got a subtle foil decal. im like a shiny card in Pokemon." and yeah maybe i had to keep thinking "stretch marks are normal and permanent and do not make people worse" every time i saw one for a couple years. but y'all it was so incredibley worth it!
I think I’ve talked about it before but the hypersexualized ‘twink feminine trans guy’ thing has caused people’s (mostly cis guys who prey on trans men) idea of what a standard trans guy looks like to be warped.
What is skinny for a cis woman is suddenly fat for a trans guy. Trans guys have to be super underweight to be ‘pretty’. And this pressure to fit into the ‘cute anime boy’ leaks into online spaces. I can’t tell you how many times I got called fat when I was 110lbs by other trans guys who think that the only way to be loved is to fit into what chaser cis men want them to be.
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TCH!READER ON THE INTERNET.
MASTERLIST | Basketball Player!Rafe & Model!Female Reader
*This is during the seventh chapter + if you see mistakes then don't mind em, i'll fix it tomorrow.*
coupleofnews
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coupleofnews Rafe Cameron Engaged to Model Y/N Y/L/N: A Surprise Announcement
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username01 YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME???
username02 I DONT KNOW IF I SHOULD CHEER CRY BC MY MAN IS OFFICIALLY TAKEN
username03 IM CONVULSING ON THE FLOOR AS WE FUCKING SPEAK
username04 @/username03 SAME BFF SAME
sza Congratulations to the cutest 🩷🎉 I wish you two the best. It's so good to see such a powerful, beautiful, talented and sweet WOC cuff a white man. Rooting for y'all 🧸🫢
username05 @/sza MOM GET OUT OF IG AND RELEASE THAT ALBUM
username06 anybody think it's weird 🤯
username07 @/username06 No your right. It's too soon. I'm sure she forced him
coupleofnews @/username07 You're** if you wanna drag someone at least do it right
username08 it's not even be a month since they've been tgt and they alr getting married?? bitch me too
username09 i know damn well they've been tgt for a while
username10 @/username09 exactly 👍 cause ain't no way YN would get married so easily
username11 does YN and Rafe know this?
coupleofnews @/username11 Your ass is about to know something else
username12 @/coupleofnews PLEASE 😭 COP don't play abt her infos
yn_updates coupleofnews js know that if ure lying ... 🪓
coupleofnews @/yn_updates NO HO IM SO SERIOUS ABOUT THIS!!!!
username13 @/coupleofnews how did you even get that info
coupleofnews @/username13 Someone in YN's entourage said it to me
username14 @/coupleofnews W H A T
ynmodelz
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ynmodelz Gagged?
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username01 MAMA U SO FCKING FINE
username02 face so crazy i might switch lanes
username03 how are you pretty funny kind and perfect
username04 aren't you at a event rn
ynmodelz @/username04 ... okay stalker ☝️
username05 the way she's bagging every pretty white men on this earth
username06 @/username05 rafe, elordi, mescal, chalamet and that one sexy ex
aishapatel girl kissing right now in my bed
username07 @/aishapatel AISHA YN REVIVAL OMG LIFE IS SO GOOD
ynmodelz @/aishapatel breakup with your husband first ☹️
jjmaybank @/ynmodelz every time i catch on instagram you're gay-ing
username04 IM BACK AND YOURE GETTING MARRIED?????
username08 I NEVER DOUBTED U YN!!! I KNEW U COULD CUFF RAFE UP
username09 u must be a magician of some kind to cuff RAFE CAMERON
arianagrande congrats to you lovie ☁️💞✨
sza So happy for you! Wishing you the best
kiaracarrera face card so insane i want you right now
bellahadid Ohmygod YN ❤️ I miss you and congrats on the engagement ❤️
username10 @/bellahadid missing the days where yn and bella would vlog their day before a runway 😭
username11 she must have forced him. why did he pick a brown girl
username12 @/username11 He wanted to be woke for sure
username13 @/username11 how could he pick her when chiara is right in front of him
aishapatel @/username13 so pathetic i started laughing at yall
tyla Invite me to the wedding please sister 🤍
username14 every time i see her she's getting skinnier and smaller
username15 GIRL UR NOT GONNA BELIEVE WHAT I HEARD
username15 SOMEONE SNITCHED ON U
yn_updates
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yn_updates THEY ARE GETTING MARRIED OMG IM LITERALLY FREAKING OUT OMG OMG OMG
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username01 NOBODY LOVES THEM LIKE I DO
username02 the first pic represents them so well
username03 @/username02 i love how she's always rolling her eyes at him
username02 @/username03 and he eats that shit up for breakfast
username04 the way he kept his hands on her ALL NIGHT is pretty insane
username05 i love when pretty people are in relationships
username06 Im so obsessed with them
username07 HE MET AISHA!!! OH ITS SO SERIOUS YALL! THEYRE HAVING BABIES
username08 @/username07 what do u mean?
username09 @/username08 Aisha used to meet YN's bfs all the time until she stopped.... it's been years and now she's meeting him.
username10 @/username08 she also said on live that she wasn't going to meet and be friendly w any of them if she didn't see a future between yn and the person
username11 he's a bad boyfriend. he's not checking on her
username02 @/username11 huh?
username11 @/username02 she's clearly suffering and he's not doing anything
topper YN Cameron... I can't believe it 😳
username12 NOW WHO SNITCHED
username13 @/username12 what if i said chiara?
username14 @/username13 but how would she even know
username07 @/username14 she's white and pretty... that tells you everything
username15 and i just know she makes him giggle and kick his feet
username16 and I just know YN sends him 1000 memes
username09 and I just know they make playlist and pinterest boards about themselves (YN's idea)
username17 and i js know that when they argue they use Aisha to communicate "Rafe asking if you're okay"
username18 oh and i know she stops him from doing smth stupid every time with a "babe, no" and then he pouts 🥺🥺
#tch#rafe cameron imagine#rafe imagine#rafe outer banks#rafe x reader#rafe cameron prompt#rafe cameron fluff#rafe cameron x reader#rafe fanfiction#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe obx#outerbanks rafe#rafe cameron#rafe smut#rafe cameron smut#obx smut#obx x reader#outer banks fanfiction#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron x female reader#rafe cameron x you#drew starkey#drew starkey smut#x reader#smau#social media#rafe cameron smau#obx smau#drew starkey x reader#the contracted heart
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And I just have to tell you that I
Love you so much these days,
#homestuck#dirk strider#bgd#brain ghost dirk#jake english#dirkjake#hs2#homestuck^2#homestuck 2#hsbc#homestuck beyond canon#homestuck epilogues#candy epilogue#admin draws#fanart#i cant even pretend im normal about my own art or this song im sorry#im tryna think of something to say abour this and i keep thinking about the lyrics and i GRGRHHHHFHFJG#i dunno man. i love plastic beach. i cant say anything here that is not gallbladder-achingly cheesy#but just. i dont know.#jake keeping a little bit of dirk in his heart all those years. even if bgd is 'all' jake hes still in the memory he carries#when i listen i find myself stuck between which singer/verse should be jake and which should be dirk. but the answer is simple#theyre both both.#jake thinks hes the one singing abour getting abandoned. but really hes the one losing himself in the substance#and dirk. dirk is the one watching him lose himself. but since hes just a part of jake. yeah.#'i have to tell you that i love you so much these days' both as something jake is saying to dirk and what jake wishes dirk was there to say#hes so alone in that reality. even if he might not admit and go so far as to imagine dirk saying it. its something that deep down#he aches to hear. the man who has deemed himself unlovable and incapable of love. he still wants to hear it despite himself#he still wants to say it despite nnot being able to bring himself to even process that emotion#sigh. see what happens. i cant talk aboht it bc a single line turns intoTHIS
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If you were to like redesign Magneto's classic outfit in a way that both suits the character and your own tastes, how would you redesign it?
uhhhh errrmmmmm i dont know i really couldnt improve upon perfection but i have still tried for you my friend !!!
#xmen#xmen comics#magneto#erik lehnsherr#max eisenhardt#erik magnus lensherr#like ig fc erik there too but only if you squint Generally Speaking this aint about him#snap sketches#i thought this was gonna be a quick thing but then As I Do i sat and thought about it for too long#and for what. my end result isn't that different from the beginning !! tragic .#out of these i think. it MAY be obvious i like the far right one#once i remembered I Do In Fact love megaman i locked in cause everytime i draw Classic Magneto all i think of is megaman#cant even make a magnetman joke that mfer already exists and he from my FAVORITE classic megaman title tyvm#anyway. should i explain my reasoning now. man i guess i can try#i couldnt tho is the thing- at least for the first set i really was just ickin around and seeing what i Might like#evidently it was nothing LMAO i told yall i cant improve perfection ... so i just. Smash Bros'd his classic look#With some tearing on the cape cause i said so ............#at most- with the furthermost right bit- i just wanted to emphasize a feeling of 'power' hence the chunkier boots + gloves#with the first look i tried that angle with showing some arm skin buuuuttt i dont like it ...#i think the sleeveless look really only works if the outfit's black idk i cant explain it#overall the first design i tried just feels too sleek for my liking if i wanted to go for a 'power' approach#i like the 'M' i did with the legs at least. i really wanted to incorporate an M in case it wasnt clear but alas ...#tbh i might steal the boots/gloves/underwear design from myself when i draw classic magneto regularly. SHRUG we'll see#as for now i am very sleepy and i have class in the morning and i want to do some work Before Class#very cool but very sad i dont have my third class today :( its my fave class :( at least i get more time to work#and the more work i get done the more time i get to draw the sillies !!! epic ...#anyways. good night everyone !!!!!!! talk to yall tomorrow ..... probably ... or later ig technically... i should sleep earlier <- wont
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akdsljfklsdjfjksdf marian: "do you like gardening?" eilia: "very much! NOW TELL ME EVERYTHING ABT RODERICK" lskjflkdjsfj honestly legit alkjsdfkljsfjk
i ~do think eilia will probs clock marian as likely a, shall we say, slightly more reliable source than amira lksdjflskdjafsdf heehee but tbqh i do think eilia is gonna take absolutely EVERYTHING from ~any of his wives or children w a heaping grain of salt bc like???? i do think its pr obv that arthur at least is chugging that roderick koolaid and cassandra's got those rose-colored lenses and yeah!! eilia is NOT here to idealize that man hahaha
but her straight up warning them abt amira!!! i love it!!! eilia like '...somehow this family is even worse than i thought' laksjdfkljsdfjk
oooh but i love the idea of marian offering her an alliance!!!! tbh tho i dont think eilia ~will say that? bc i feel like she thinks arthur is noT who you want on the throne, what w his roderick worship, bc she's had a lot less face time w him (he always just...goes straight over to aria when he's w the staffords ;D and so eilia hasn't seen the change she's making on him), annnnd in a scenario where she marries roderick, i ~can potentially see her eventually just being all like 'fuck it' and legit tryna get her own kid throned so that that kid (or his mother the regent ;D) can turn around and peacefully dissolve the empire and free everyone basically lakjsdfklsjdfjsdf buT i do think if marian were like 'hey we can get astaira out of this empire if we make arthur its ruler' or whatever, basically, eilia would ~rather go that route, no question!!!!! on sooo many levels honestly hahaha
so yeah ig what im saying is like...i think it kinda depends how the convo comes abt? i feel like eilia's gut atm tho is that, if it ~has to be a varmont ruling the world, guin is the best option for future ruler bc crowning an empress does at least restore a ~few of astaira's prev rights that roderick stripped away, i.e. women being able to rule etc! however, if edmund does take godfrey (and rosie)'s advice and starts going pro-astairan, i do feel like eilia would then wanna back ~him bc her priority is always the greater good of astaira, basically! but that being said, if ~arthur does that (which admittedly he's already dipped his toe in that pool #thanksaria), again, that might bring her around to ~him so!! i can honestly see her going any of a number of ways on all of this frankly! it all depends who seems best for astaira! but yeah if marian can guarantee astaira's freedom, then eilia's in!!! let's make arthur emperor, then!!!!! laksdjflkjsdfkjd
OOC | Eilionora & Marian
forgottenarias said: @giadesstrin I was legit contemplating if Marian would like Aria or not but i’m guessing now she does? or at least is cordial enough that she can be like “hey another one of my kids is on death’s door HELP PLEASEEEE” giadesstrin said: @forgottenarias dgjjfdgh omgggggg I didn’t really think abt that relationship I love that!!!! I’m screaming now too bc like…She’s honestly in such a weird position re: her bc like on one hand her hubby wants to marry her sister???? On another her son is interested in her??? And on yet ANOTHER she’s a professed enemy of her house who helped save her son like??!?!! Poor Marian honestly what a position to be in sgjkfsfhj how is anyone supposed to deal w ALL of that good AND bad shkkgdfh forgottenarias said: @giadesstrin I need to do an OOC for Marian & Eilia but I def think Marian doesn’t want Roderick to marry her 1) because there doesn’t need to be any other contenders in this heir to the throne race and 2) as much as she still loves him, being married to Roderick is definitely not all it is cracked up to be! Part of marian wants to protect her from him! forgottenarias said: @giadesstrin and with Aria I think that Marian def wouldn’t like her if there was event the slightest implication of even a potential of some sort of romantic relationship w/ Arthur bc NO ONE is ever going to be good enough for her first born! Sorry ladies! You clearly just want him for his money/power! But Aria being proactive in this above instance and not really wanting anything in return is not a thing she’s used to so she’s not sure WHAT to think rn! Plus she fixed her precious child!!!
sdfasdf ok so i thought id go ahead and make an ooc for them, and i included the bit abt aria bc i do think that that has the potential to impact eilia/aria things as well!
ok so!! i honestly think that eilia at first thought that it was just really weird that roderick had all these wives and she was like WHY WOULD THEY PUT UP W THAT but uhhhh recently she's been like 'oh. ig maybe they didn't get much of a choice' bc that's certainly been ~her experience re: dating roderick hahaha and eilia def has more agency than they did, being -- though deposed -- a queen so now honestly i think she just feels sooooo horrible for them and is lowkey looking at them -- these two V DIFFERENT yet both v clearly unhappy women -- like 'there but by the grace of the guardians go i' basically laskdjfkdlsf and honestly i think atp she's really come around in the way she looks at them both!! esp marian (bc i def think amira gives off resting bitch face but as a full blown personality disorder even if ur tryna approach her whole deal optimistically alskdjflksjdfajdf)!!!!!
i ~do think if she knows that a lot of the varmont kids have a good relationship w the malconaires that would def be a boost in their favor bc eilia trusts them etc but i ~do think eilia is still feeling far from trusting of the varmonts, themselves, even if she does know that!! just...'at least they're not as horrible as i thought' rather than 'they're good ppl after all' basically hahaha and i do think that, given that its looking more or more like she might be wife #4, eilia has been thinking abt what roderick might look like as a dad since she's now afraid he might be the father of ~her children, and she's like YIKES
so, all in all, she's feeling much more sympathetic towards both marian and her family (minus roderick, STILL decidedly NOT a fan of his)!! and esp w marian on the cusp of this w her sister, i can see where they could maybe start having more ~honest conversations, perhaps? bc i do feel that eilia has played this entire thing by being observant and polite -- stalwart where she needs (ie when it comes to her country and astairans and keeping them safe etc) to be but other than that mostly closed off emotionally and courteous, but basically just tryna give them NOTHING bc she figures they'll use anything at all against her they can
but yeah its been a looooong journey getting there i feel hahahaha and even now she'd def be tentative and clam up at the slightest sign of trouble ngl
#marian varmont#ooc#i feel like this wasn't super clear ajklsfkljsdf#the brain fog is so real today alksjdfklsjdf#arthur varmont#edmund varmont#guinevere varmont#roderick varmont
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#detroit become human#connor rk800#rk900#hank anderson#hank then says oh boy come on lets go to lunch and they all go to lunch#i like the idea that sure rk900 can talk but the idea of telling connor he might be malfunctioning#is a very personal thing and he respects NOT broadcasting that news so he just does the mind link#and then is like well that worked out better so no one else can hear me be wrong even though i still think im right#idk man just seeing him in one scene where connor is told oh youll be deactivated#is like wow ive seen so much fanart of this fella and i really like him but he is basically a fandom oc and i dont want to be wrong#also i noticed some artists color his hair darker than connors but some draw him the same hair color#so i kinda mixed it with using the same base but then making the shading and highlights less warm#its probably not even that noticeable to anyone but SHRUGS
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Probably not gonna match with when this comes out translated, but still—just a few things I liked about BNHA 423
WE GOT TO SEE THE VESTIGES AGAAAAINNNNN!!! HI BRUCE!
I think Bruce gets a lot of bad angles. This is an example (but it's okay honey, you're still hot stuff)
Unfortunately, I have a favorite. It's Bruce. The most Normal Guy™ in the vestige line up. And the special-est sopping wet cat for Kudo ever (Yoichi is a dry cat because at least Kudo remembered to take Yoichi inside).
The vestiges were all gearing for a punch, but Tomura/Tenko is reaching out.
The rest of the users usually use OFA to punch, is the general idea we see. But Tomura/Tenko's Quirk isn't that.
Tomura/Tenko reaching his hand out to grab, and the vestiges readying a punch—it's their ways of putting the hurt on.
And Tomura/Tenko knows what happens if he puts his fingers on someone. He was aiming for AFO's head too. Guy was pissed.
I like that the vestiges look like they're crawling out of hell (or the depths) here. Technically for OFA itself, which they embody, being in AFO's realm was hell. It meant they failed their collective goals to win against AFO, and keep OFA [Yoichi] out of his possession
Also, they're all embers of who they once were. If Factors embodied their personalities, these embers are the leftovers of that embodiment. Their eyes are blank.
And even when they're only shattered fragments of themselves, they came for AFO to take him down.
They really embodied that purpose. Even as husks of themselves, or sad leftovers that scattered from their destroyed Factors, they still reached forward to clock AFO one last time.
They were that determined, and that determination was all that was left of them.
Meanwhile, with Yoichi, his itty bitty remains continued trying to talk sense into his brother till the end.
Yoichi has such a bleeding heart. But he also loved his brother.
AFO is standing in the dark. But in that dark, there's a light. It's Yoichi, as if he were the light at the end of the tunnel.
AFO chased OFA for decades, and ruined a lot of lives, just to have Yoichi by his side again.
Joining hands with Garaki; killing Banjo, En, Nana; forcing the creation and upbringing of Tenko; the whole Shimura incident; everything he did to UA and the Aoyamas to get close to the wielder of OFA [Yoichi]. He did all that, and more.
He just wanted the chance to have Yoichi with him again. That was his purpose in obtaining OFA this whole time.
Yoichi was AFO's light at the end of the tunnel.
Too bad for AFO, the light at the end of the tunnel was an oncoming train.
Yoichi is telling AFO what happened, but I love that in front of Yoichi, AFO became himself. I mean, not a mass of scar tissue, but who he originally looked like
Idk, there's just something symbolic about it?
Midoriya calls AFO a lonely man. And Yoichi comes to him, and AFO says he wants Yoichi by his side. He wouldn't be lonely if that were the case. Yoichi could make him not lonely anymore.
And the lonely man, a bundle of scar tissue from his warpath to see Yoichi again, reverts to a time he had no injuries or scars. He looks like the period of time where he and Yoichi lived in the same era.
In front of Yoichi, he's just.. himself, I guess is how to put it. Not a mass of scar tissue, or the evil villain everyone feared: he's literally just Yoichi's "Nii-san".
It's like, the scar tissue shed itself to reveal AFO's true face.
He wants to see Yoichi's face, and ended up showing his own without even meaning or thinking to.
He's finally looking straight at Yoichi, trying to see his face. It's not like when Yoichi was alive, when AFO always looked down on him, and just waited for him to bend to his will.
Now, AFO has little time left with Yoichi, and he's lost his composure for it, wanting to see Yoichi as more than an ember. But maybe he got to the point he only ever saw Yoichi for his Factor, rather than the Factor for Yoichi: how often has he said he was chasing One For All, instead of his younger brother?
AFO wanted to see Yoichi's face, but when he saw Yoichi next to Kudo... yeah, he lost his mind a bit there. Probably (Definitely?) because he saw Kudo's Ability, and Kudo with Yoichi. And Kudo is "to blame for everything".
Maybe he lost it seeing Kudo and Yoichi together, because it was a repeat of the past, I suppose?
(Technically, he did see Yoichi's face one last time already. Just that he also saw the bastard Kudo's face again too. And AFO did not like that.)
#ngl i sped through this chapter until i saw the vestiges were mentioned and went back to it#just to see bruce. that was it#but i did end up taking another look later in the day#bnha#mha#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#bruce#kudo#PLEASE I WANT FULL NAMES#en tayutai#nana shimura#yoichi shigaraki#tomura shigaraki#tenko shimura#banjo daigoro#ofa#afo#all for one#one for all#im so happy we got to see the vestiges again and AFO being a pathetic man for his little brother#AFO did love him. to borrow a line from something i wrote:#[A twisted sense of love that was - nonetheless - love]#okay originally theres commas but tags dont let that. i just think that line applies to AFO in regards to Yoichi#might be cringy yeah but i wrote that a long time ago so. AFO does love its just he shows it and believes it wrong#or maybe the narration copies AFO's twisted own to fit his Demon Lord narrative: “Yoichi was his possession he wouldnt let go easily”#ok sure AFO#idk i just thought these pages were interesting#bnha 423#bnha spoilers
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love thinking kipperlilly spends her afterlife looking for lucy in a familiar forest
#not art#fhjy#fhjy spoilers#like. does she have a mean of knowing lucy and yolanda got sent to cassandra's domain to hang out for a bit#kipperlilly's isolation means so much to me. she is punished for everything she's done she just doesn't pick up on it#until the moment she dies! one more funky thing that mirrors riz in which he's actively tried to cultivate a community and denied it#until the bad kids. while kipperlilly does not want or care about a community she just wants someone who validates her#but she does Need a community so she latches onto the person she lets closer to her to fulfill her emotional needs#she took the ritual willingly so this might genuinely be her first death. probably terrifying#probably not even enough bandwidth to feel mortified. maybe immediately seeking something comforting out of instinct alone#lmao honestly thinking too much abt fantasy high afterlifes gives me a headache And a visceral fear#Im not religious but I grew up in a culture with a dominantly buddhist/taoist cosmology its Scary that u just go to A Place after u die!!#and then ur still urself!!! thats scary to me what do u mean u stay like that forever. thats fucked#but yeah I think this influences how I see kipperlilly turn out a little bit. in a sense I think of her as being a ghost now#yknow. trying to solve something from life so she can move on and. stop living this life etc#man the reveal that lucy took being killed pretty seriously and is like yeah the others are decent and even sweet#and probably was just trying to hold her party together and do what she thinks is moral by hearing kipperlilly out#lol lmao etc. gods I gotta wonder how kipperlilly's mindset handled jawbones' help#it really is damn tragic tho. I stand by what I said folks like this will complain and be nasty to be around#but they dont have enough desire to inconvenience themselves to off the bat do something abt what they find unfair or whatever#its when theyre handed the seemingly very easy means to be right that they'll start being dangerous#its horribly tragic that the supposed metaplayer and the self-perceived mastermind turned out to ultimately be just an useful idiot#yknow what. I think personally in my heart kipperlilly moves on from her afterlife the moment she says sorry#doesnt even have to be to lucy but that's probably gonna be who received it#ah.... teenage rebellion. teenage gamejacking
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Lol
#theres nothing quite like your mother saying Well maybe you shouldve been more careful because now your boss might think youve been flirting#with this male coworker (whom i like splendidly as a friend) and now maybe she thinks youre not trustworthy#and maybe she regrets hiring you because you said you feel like youre making a lot of mistakes this week and she might assume thats because#your head is filled with this boy.#so dont make her regret hiring you.#MA'AM I TOLD YOU I WAS ALREADY ANXIOUS BECAUSE I MADE SO MANY MISTAKES TODAY WHY ARE YOU MAKING ME ASHAMED#OF SOMETHING THAT I HONESTLY HAD NO CLUE I OUGHT TO BE ANXIOUS ABOUT AT MY FIRST NEW JOB AFTER IVE GRADUATED????#anyway going to bed i cant take this anymore LOL she said it so lightly and im like. well i never even considered#being afraid of making my boss regret hiring me somehow because of some kind of behaviour that i had no idea was sending some kind of signal#anywaysssss 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#and then she was like why are you crying?? 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀#not to be like this is partly why i didnt want to move home but confound it all why are things like this#can i not simply confide in my mother my anxieties and worriws#worries#and not also have to worry about her potentially being like Well have you considered you ARE right and it IS your fault?#idk man something something firstborn child eldest daughter can i have some room to breathe. please#also not to whine but Not my father walking in on me eating dinner at 10pm because i was holed up#in my room in a semi depressive state after so many gong shows in a work day and straight up having no appetite#but deciding my body needs the food anyway its better late than never.....walking in and then saying#you know if you eat this late you'll gain weight. SIR??????????????????#sorry to complain and rant again i simply cannot in this house and whats more am doing my best to honour my parents#but why is it so hard out here and how can they say stuff like that with a smile!!!!!!!#also i DO have an inner critic who is always like Its your fault you are the worst you should be ashamed always........why do my parents#not understand after knowing me for so long and watching me grow up#that i can make myself so ashamed of the smallest thing so easily and that what they say drives me to shame almost as easily?#ANYWAY LOL WHAT A DAY#you guys!!! i am working so hard i promise i PROMISE I am!!! it is my first full time job ever and i am working so so hard#i am doing my absolute best and no one sees it and that is FINE i just wish my parents would see that i AM trying!!#i come back home so dead every single day because i put in 120%! this is literally my first job after graduation#and my parents KNOW this has been the most exhausting taxing and soul crushing year ive had in my very short life so far
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Max when the contraption he built specifically for Jimmy to throw knives at Duncan is used by Jimmy to throw knives at Duncan:
#cw violence#cw implied violence#cw knife#max design pro#mdp max#mdp jimmy#mdp duncan#mdp bully#mdp triflethumb#yes im into max design pro. feel free to block me#it just fascinates me okay#that aside: holy shit i wasnt expecting triflethumb to be canonized. ESPECIALLY NOT LIKE THIS???#and its interesting that “the end of twiddlefinger” is happening at the same time#i guess one of the monkey brothers just gotta be evil lol#i wonder if triflethumb will attack max? and how he will deal with that?#weve still yet to see the full end of the tf saga/who shot max so it might lead more into that#but yeah anyways this channel is fucking insane#and i do think max was kinda stupid in this short#i get that he was upset that jimmy was getting corrupted more than anything but idk man#if u dont want ur brother to become murderous maybe dont encourage him to throw knives at people? just a thought#though... maybe twiddle was actually the one who made jimmy do that? and max only snapped into consciousness after the fact?#i know it was maxs regular sprite but still. idk maybe he just went dormant somehow#quamais rambles
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i understand the frustration with “i made this gay pairing cis x trans so they can still have biological babies” with no thought to other methods and how ppl assume thats the case when it comes to mothpool aus where mothwing is also the mother of the three, but also…. idk i kinda dont give a shit if someone wants to do that and i dont really think its inherently transphobic as long as its handled with care and respect.
what really concerns me about this debate is how some people are adamant that you cannot portray trans people having biological children in media or youre being disrespectful. and im gonna say as a nonbinary person who doesnt want children for themself- thats kinda fucking weird? like i understand that for some people, theyre trans themselves and theyre speaking from a place of dysphoria, and i absolutely get that, which is why i think the topic should be handled with nuance and diversity in trans characters, but like…. guys. pregnant trans men exist irl. trans women get people pregnant irl. trans ppl’s ability and right to parent and have biological children are being debated irl. we get denied the opportunity to adopt as well.
in a climate like this, are we SURE we want the stance on rewrites and headcanons in the silly cat books to be “if you portray trans characters having children, especially with a gay couple, youre a transphobic freak no matter what!” does it really matter? especially if its being done by a trans person handling the topic with nuance who has a lot of trans characters with varying perspectives?
obviously yes, remember that thats not the only way certain gay couples can have kids, remember that not every trans person is fully comfortable with it and keep that in mind, remember that surrogacy and adoption are also perfectly valid ways to give fan babies- but remember that there are OPTIONS. not that you need to condemn the idea of transgender parents in the first place unless they fit the very specific criteria of “proper transgender representation” and anything that dares deviate from that is proof the op is a transphobic monster (bonus points if theyre a trans creator bc i mostly see trans people getting shit for this and it kinda pisses me off. although idm if cis people do it either as long as theyre handling it with respect)
#and this isnt getting into how trans mothwing outside of mothpool is a really good way to read her character#sorry. remembered the shit bonefall got despite being trans as well and got annoyed#that especially annoys me bc hes got plenty of surrogacies but the second hed touch a trans pregnancy#‘’no you cant do that!!! you freak!!! obviously you only see trans people as a loophole for gays to have babies!!!’’#also my gf and i were talking and obviously take this with a grain of salt bc this is our experience#but…. i think a lot of the ppl saying this……. havent really talked to trans women?#dude some of the ones i know LOVE the idea of getting people pregnant#did you know trans women have sex? did you know trans people in general have sex?? did you know trans people irl wanna start families?#did you know that? did you? or do you black out at the idea of a trans woman being anything but strictly pure and nonsexual#and OBVIOUSLY this is not every trans woman. some do have dysphoria around the idea#but im genuinely starting to wonder how these people act around irl transgender parents#whether they had kids before or after coming out#bc ngl. the attitude that thinking about this makes you a transphobic pervert?#directed at trans people making content for themselves?#im starting to think you all just dont want us to reproduce. if we reproduce we arent ‘’good’’ trans people#because a ‘’real’’ man wouldnt carry a child. a ‘’real’’ woman would carry the child. and god forbid the gays even THINK about reproducing#and being around children!#if we have children then we’re doing things that might make cishets look at us and declare we’re not perfect#we’ve proved we’re not just identical to cis ppl!! (and therefore deserving of respect!)#idk. i think this was mostly a case of tumblr going ‘’oh someone said no to this so lets push this to an unhealthy extreme!!’’#and i cant help but notice nobody really brings up nonbinary parents at all in this discussion#not that we have it ‘’better’’ or anything for that but yknow. are we supposed to swear it off?#is the idea of us having kids inconcievable? or worse…. does it mean we ‘’picked a side?’’#so its not even worth getting mad at a pregnant nb person bc ‘’well thats a woman so who cares’’b#HMMMMM.#ohhhh i bet they also get mad if you make transfem pregnancy possible too. no winning#idk really think about it when you go ‘’you can NEVER EVER portray a trans person starting a family. bc REAL trans people would never.’’#ohhh you probably get mad when trans ppl dont get surgery for one reason or another dontcha#whether we want to or its not in the cards for us for whatever reason like cost and such#(while also getting mad if we do bc we cannot win in this no matter what)
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trying to psych myself up to finally do oc refs by doing fandom-related refs instead: volume 1
wanted to update my yuma from whatever tf this au is so he was a bit more unique... takes inspo from a lot of different things while also trying to be its own sorta thing? which is fitting given the au ;)
bonus chibi now that i'm also figuring out how tf to do chibis lol:
#my art lol#synth v yuma#yuma synthv#synth v#synthv fanart#synthesizer v#vocaloid#vocaloid fanart#YES I KNOW ITS DIFFERENT but at this rate its the umbrella tag. all vsynth shit goes under there just like on main ���#sorry for the annoyign watermarks i just dont want this to get stolennn/traced it'll b my joker arc. is2g#like thats never happened to me before as far as i know but now that my art is getting 'better' i begin to get scared that it will happen#if my fanart got stolen i'd def sting a little yeah but not hurt AS bad as if someone stole my original shit. THAT would hurt#one of many reasons why i post less personal oc stuffs. although as mentioned above i AM in an oc mood so i wanna draw em maybe...#and stuff like this is a step to develop a PROPER FUCKING REF STYLE bc i SUCKKKK AT MAKING REFS LOL 😭 BUT I SHOULD GIT GUD#i have a few other refs planned for vocaloid au (i guess???) related shit but they're not done yet. this one was also a wip that i just??#impulsively decided to redo & finish bc i wanted to draw but nothing else i was trying to draw came out right. advantages of many wips#i have SOOO many things i could say abt some of the things that went into this redesign but i dont wanna come off as pretentious 😔💔#obviously it was primarily inspired by the vimalion yuma design but. there's moreeee that i can't explain here bc tag limits and im shy#i do think i want to try and be more intentional with my character designs now so i'm seeing how that goes as i redesign some old ocs#man though this kind of stuff makes me remember i used to LOVEE doing this stuff. and now its even crazierr given art improvement#uaurhghh my head is buzzing w/. so many thoughts. THIS ALWAYS FUCKING HAPPENS I GET SO MANY IDEAS WHEN IM BUSY GFD#this is actually from today though unlike some other things i might eventually post. that'll make more sense soon#and fuckkk i forgot the chain necklace thing on the chibi yeah but i couldnt get it to look good. whatever
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sorry to log on n rant but i need to rant
#tbd.#ooc.#cw complaining#ignore the tags if u dont want to see how my life is going shdfhsf#so im doing my masters yeah#and im like. 75% thru#shouldve been done last month#but bc of the year ive had my uni adviser was rlly nice and sorted a way to extend my student status for another year#to get my dissertation done#like i did my 4 essays n now its just dissertation time#n i was supposed to start it now n get booked in with my mentor n stuff but i cant fucking log into the website#bc u need a MFA#and the MFA app my uni uses wont acknowledge me bc i have a different phone bc my phone broke#and a different number bc my phone contract got cut off#so idk what to do lol i cant log in and do anything#ive rang the IT desk for help 59w9er3424234 times#and everytime i get thru to the actual line n im taken off hold .. they hang up on me#idk if its a system error or my phone bc its a shit old one#but i cant do anything#and my universal credit claim got closed#non uk oomfs its a benefits system#n they help u with money to pay bills whether ur looking for work or unfit to work which is what my doctor said i am bc#my mental health and physical health combines to make me a super loser#n he thinks i might try to K word myself if i take too much on at once after eveerything#like i cant even sit and grieve my dad that died not even 6 months ago yet because i have to much shit to fucking do#like i cant afford to liven now#i cant pay my bills. they keep bouncing and coming back worse#i have debt collectors coming @ me#i am stuck in catch 22 man like not even my support workers can help me rn#and im very lucky that i own my own home bc of my car accident when i was 15 lol but everyone is just telling me to sell it
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ignore razor and blade in the background this isnt about them . anyway . Looks around all scared. thoughts on him ^
#if anyone is actually wondering why they are there though they were just serving as references for what a sonic style shark might look like#and i was too lazy to get rid of them#ive been wanting to make a shark sonic oc for forever . well i finally made an attempt at it#just in the 'messing around and throwing shit on the canvas to see what works'' stage rn though . dont know how much he will change#i feel like he looks a bit plain. needs more markings or accessories or something#but im also trying to stay somewhat close to what actual shark sonic characters/underwater mobians in general look like#but then again the only sharks we see are a pair of siblings who only show up in archie sonic#so they might not be the best examples. idk.#i mean im already breaking the rules by giving him shoes#but he has shoes because im thinking he might spend a lot of time on land . where its not as comfortable/safe to go barefoot#whatever man idk#my art#oh and also ive been calling him riptide the shark in my mind as a placeholder name idk if itll stick or not
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hey i might be controversial but im not really feeling the 12th doctor so far
#idkk idk what to thinkkk#i finished s8 today#im just nottt feeling ittt#i just think i might hate how moffat writes no matter what it is fdvxcdfdfv#i actually don't know WHAT is wrong because it's like... things i SHOULD be enjoying but im not it feels like its bad#idk idkkkk#i just feel there's something lacking and i felt the exact same way through the entire 11th doctor era#its just even worse now because i guess im tired#like im so desperate to enjoy this doctor like i did 9 and 10 and i just cant?? cant enjoy the companions and side characters as much eithe#idk man :(#i need to watch some older dw stuff and see if im idealizing the old episodes lmao#because i really want to have a fair opinion of this showww#heeeelpp ToT#i think i just dont like the writing? but i dont know enough about writing to actually say what's wrong#theres just something wrong#ouough#i still hold so much hope everyones always so excited about 12 and i was very excited and its just not ittt#ough ok byeeee#ok wait#like i think his personality is fine and stuff is fine it's just.. the stories? the way they present them? i dont knowwww#i just dont really like moffats dw i gues...#SAD
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aaaand immediately after answering that ask i got one pretty much saying what it is. thankfully tumblr blurs pictures in asks until you click on em so That wasn't spoiled for me but still. cmon
#tired sigh...#i wanted to hear it from the man themself!#and i was happy to have a couple of days of Excitement!#yall just... be considerate of others please#dont spoil things unless Explicitly Asked#if you wanna share say 'hey! i know! can i tell you?'#and if the answer is No (or if there is no answer) then dont! please!#basic online etiquette!#even if What It Is is easily found#some people wont go looking! we'd like to Wait & See! its not obvious to Everyone!#and it might not have been Intended to be easily found#absolutely unprompted#sorry just. spoilers really bother me in certain situations#especially when its an individual creator excited to share something they're putting out into the world#having their chance to be the one to Share taken away from them#so just! yk! be nice! hush up! hold it for three days! Three! thats not a long time! you can do it!#be considerate of clown & others!#think before you speak yk...
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