#and i just. why am i pointless
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being in your 20’s sucks cause it’s like oh boohoo i have bills and pressure to make permanent life plans. guess i’ll get so stressed i want to kill myself about it
#op#i’m 22 i have no prospects no fucking degree#nothing to show for my fucking existence#alls i do is doordash for money and sit at home and cry about money#i have over $700 in medical bills from my infections and my doctor’s appointment that insurance decided not to cover for no reason#and i just. why am i pointless#i used to be smart and promising and want to do things with my future and now i’m just some#idiot ugly insufferable unemployed fuck who cries about everything and can’t sleep from stress#god.#AND ITS NOT EVEN AN ORIGINAL KIND OF MISERY#i can’t even claim to be unique for feeling this way!!!#so i won’t get any comfort for this other than. oh well Feeling Like That is Normal for your early 20’s#and i’m just expected to pick up and carry on and hope it gets better fucking. a decade from now#i don’t want it to be better a decade from now. i want it to be better now#whatever
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#polls#polls and research#pointless poll#united states#midwest#hell#location#moving#america#look im sorry if youre insulted by me grouping some states but there are 12 Midwestern states and only 10 options allowed#i just took a trip across the country and my limited perspective is that Ohio is Not So Bad#i grew up in Missouri 🫠#why yes i am blazing this post#i enjoy whoring my ideas to the masses to satisfy my curiosity
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Sae Niijima is such a good character it drives me insane a little. She's not a mother nor a maternal or doting older sister but instead a twenty four year old who was thrown into a position of responsibility that she never asked for. She loves Makoto just as much as she resents her and its so apparent every time they talk up until November. "Are you studying?" (I want you to do well) (I need you to get a job and stop making my life harder) "I'll use any method necessary to get this promotion" (Life will be easier for us) (So stop distracting me with your problems) "Focus on your future" (I know that you're capable) (I can't afford to waste my time on you, so stop wasting time on others)
Makoto is not only the sole reason she pushes as hard as she does for a promotion, for success, and the reason that she loses herself in her animosity over her fathers death, but also someone she can't stand for so long. Makoto was 14-15 when their father died. Sae was 21. As soon as she got the career she wanted and things started to look up, her stability was robbed from her and she was disillusioned with the system that her father had taught her to rely on and completely adhere to. How do you manage, the daughter of a cop, following his footsteps towards law enforcement, when you're suddenly reminded of how unfair it is? You can't quit, your little sister relies on you and she's so young and struggling just as badly with this grief. So you pick yourself up and you get moving again. You push harder, press further. You abandon your morals and your ethics because punishing criminals (guilty or not) is almost like punishing the man who killed your father.
And the whole time she's fighting for promotions, going for drinks with the SIU Director to make herself more favourable for promotions, trying to navigate being a woman in a competitive, suffocating, male-dominated field, falling behind despite doing so much where others are promoted for doing so little - all the while your little sister comes back from school and her biggest issues are so small compared to yours.
Persona 5 revolves so heavily around grief and loss and change and Sae embodies all of that so well, all of the sharp and unpleasant and jagged parts of grief.
#sae niijima#persona brainrot real#idk what possessed me for this i jsut love her#beyond her being rlly hot and such a driven and compelling character#the way that we see her on screen is so heavily shaped and influenced by grief that its almost crushing when you notice it#she focuses on work because if she falls behind it could cost her and her sister everything#yet she lives in her fathers house. works a job her father would be proud of. is praised through her proximity to her father.#her sister idolises her and relies on her like a parent. sae was never supposed to be that to her#how am i meant to be your mother and your father? how am i meant to be the source of stability in your life when im not stable in mine#and the whole time your little sister sits there and where shes actually putting on a brave face and forcing through her own grief#struggling to put a life without her father into perspective#to you she just looks ... complacent. willfully ignorant to the situation that you're both in and the struggles you're both facing#why WOULDNT you hate her?#and then you realise that shes not ignorant. shes not as stupid or as oblivious as you thought#every time she was being distracting and asking pointless questions she was just reaching out to you#and each time you had to push her hand away and tell her not now. focus. study.#they drive me insane actually#persona 5#p5r#persona 5 royal#makoto niijima
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testing out drawing maormer 🪸🐚🪸 and a nelvas 🧣📜🩷 i'll ramble about maormer a bit in the tags
#tes#skyrim#my art#do you like my nelvas emojis🧣📜🧣📜 get it? scarf🤗 and scroll🤗 Everything hurts sofucking bad#anyways i talked about them wif my friend quite a bit i basically 'agree' w/ everything that is written about them && their biology in -#- canon; except tes is very much all Talk and no good actual visual presentation of what it's talking about#cus all of the maormer look like garboooo likeee what am i looking @#but since this is just a first test i think i'll keep playing around with their looks later; they are most close to altmer obvi in the -#- sense of how 'mutated' they r. however maormer are more gross looking for the typical human#they do have flat faces and alldat in canon already but i want them to just have nostrils and no real nose bridge#and they have no lips😝 they also have very visible gums. && have anglerfish teeth#what would be fur on other mer is just scales on them and is placed is scattered in the same places#i was thinking of making swimming most comfortable for them so i gave them more fins#they'd have them on arms and legs and the hair on the tail for them is just a big fin🐠#as for hair i'm thinking of them having none of it at all bcos it looks sooooo ugly on them it's very unnerving to see hair on fish#either no hair at all or something with a different texture. like slimy silky thin seaweed#or the hair that m*necraft striders have LMAO#webbed fingers is cuuuute they'd have webbed armpits like they're those flying rodents🐿 lol#i'd place their gills on both the neck and their ribs#whenever they wear clothes they tie their arm and leg fins up ; i think from birth they just stay in water until they hit puberty and -#- r able to actually walk around#another cute fact is that males and females wud look literally the same almost (women are flat chested too)#fish fish fish#maybe i'll rethink some stuff. i still wanna draw fish babies#but in reality i think even the mere existence of maormer is very pointless bc they don't really matter at all do they#tes lore is soooo overstuffed that's why i don't know anything about it my time is so valuable to meLMFAOAOOO#saw a typo in this sorry i'm just chill like that
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Zeus: Nothing in life is free.
Aphrodite: Love is free.
Apollo: Adventure is free.
Hermes: Everything is free if you take it without paying.
#IM BACK WITH THE INCORRECT QUOTES#I stopped with labeling the number of them for a multitude of reasons#it was really really annoying to figure out which incorrect quote I was on for one#especially since I do a lot of mythologies#also no one really cares because if you spot this on your dash aint no one going to go#“Oh hey I sure am glad I know the creator made 30 more of these!”#and it's just pointless overall#so I got rid of it#I have no idea why I went on that rant lol#had to get it out of my system#mythology#greek mythology#greek gods#incorrect quotes#apollo#zeus#aphrodite#hermes
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Jin Guangyao Is In Desperate Need Of Human Contact And Is Constantly Trying To Find Ways To Make Himself Feel Safe: Therefore He Would Definitely Be A Little Spoon, In This Essay I Will
#it is the ideal situation#mdzs#nieyao#jin guangyao#nie mingjue#jgy#nmj#meng yao#i joked about it early but this is one pointless headcanon that i am committed to#he gets to be tucked away and have an entire human body (strong powerful cultivator body) between him and any potential danger#don't care which ship just committed to the sleeping arrangements#my art#i don't know why i keep trying to shade night scenes i hate night scenes my colours and shadows never work out in night scenes...#but here we are
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Y’know. Anakin was a real asshole in Ahsoka’s hallucination.
Like. She mentions something about what she’ll be able to teach her padawan one day, since all she’s being taught is how to be a soldier, and Anakin’s like “teaching’s not all it’s cracked up to be”
And like. Asshole move. And Ahsoka rightfully calls him out on it. And he goes on the whole “uuuh I was joking. Lighten up.” Literally a complete jackass.
But beyond how he answered the question, it’s a valid complaint Ahsoka is bringing up! Anakin’s teaching her how to live or die. But Ahsoka wants to be taught how to be a jedi.
What happens after the war is over (order 66 never happens) and she now has to navigate a galaxy without a war? The Jedi take teaching very seriously there’s no greater honor than teaching a padawan. And she’s not being accurately taught, so she will not be able to pass anything on to the next generation.
But Anakin brushes it aside because he simply does not respect her or her wishes. Like. He never wanted a padawan, despite teaching being foundational to the Jedi. And he only took ahsoka in because he started to like her and became attached to her. He doesn’t care about jedi legacy, not really. So he brushes her comment off with a joke.
But in the rest of the vision… idk it didn’t feel like we were supposed view Anakin as entirely wrong here. He wasn’t in the right, he was definitely channeling Vader and being an ass, but he was basically the reason Ahsoka survived the fall, right? Bc he was making her choose life? When Ahsoka wins against him it’s sort of like she’s both learned his lesson and moved beyond him. And then for the rest of the season he’s only talked about in positive ways.
And like. That one line ahsoka said was really powerful in relation to the entire point of the show. What does she have to pass onto her own padawan (Sabine) if she wasn’t properly trained herself? That is, perhaps, the only valid plot question asked in the entire show. And it doesn’t get an answer. It’s never even brought up again.
#I have now learned Dave filoni wrote the entire series#so I am able to say now with absolute positivity that he’s a shit writer#I had been blaming the issues that the writers went on strike for#but no it’s just filoni being a terrible writer I guess?#I mean. none of the character issues are ever really resolved#we have no reason to believe ahsoka is ready to be a master now#we have no real understanding of WHY Sabine unlocked her force powers and shit (not how it works but whatever)#Sabine never learns her lesson about letting thrawn come back#Ahsoka doesn’t get anything really resolved with Anakin#she just acts like he was never Vader and that he was a great master#when we SEE in her vision he was not#idk it’s like every character plot point was dropped#nothing happened in the first half of the show#the dark side girl had a half rebellion but we got no emotion or background from her#it was just… a pointless show#nothing was accomplished#star wars#anti ahsoka#anti anakin skywalker
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god we need to bring crackfic back. or just short and idiotic ideas that wouldn’t happen but would be funny to read
#i just had a vivid imagination of geralt’s company having a pillow fight#setting and timeframe: september 10ish. in riverdell aka transriver#dandelion hits geralt with his bedroll pillow (a quite flat thing and not very comfortable but what are you to do) for levity#it’s a game of a bygone time. a mild pillow fight is plausible between geralt and dandelion in the short stories#cahir comments . wow … really dandelion … this is so juvenile … i haven’t done a pillow fight since i was 10 … it’s for kids…#dandelion’s response: pillow to the face. immediate vicovarian reaction: dandelion razed harder by his pillow than cintra by nilfgaard#dandelion screams ear-curdlingly (you’d imagine someone was being murdered in this swamp)#geralt (still at this moment in time resentful of cahir) leaps and attacks him with his pillow#geralt and cahir spar with pillows like swords but get to smothering each other quickly#milva (see this is foreshadowing for like two weeks days later) had enough and starts pillowing the both of them#she also had not said literally anything for the past week so this is a surprise that she would involve herself#dandelion hits milva on the ass (with his pillow…) she nearly kills him#geralt and cahir try to save dandelion etc#regis has been watching all of this like 🫤#geralt (better mood now) asks him why he is not getting involved.#regis: ‘what… ought i to be doing’#geralt: ‘helping me smack cahir with pillows’#regis doesn’t even sleep with a pillow. dandelion calls out he probably has an extra on his bedroll. milva screams at regis don’t touch that#regis psychoanalyzes they are relieving their stresses and anxieties in a social bonding ritual involving play fighting#which is likely of primal origin in simian social troupes but i digress#regis reasons he doesn’t have latent quarrels with anyone in the group so it would be pointless for him to join#cahir is like well i like everybody here and i still am smacking dandelion with a pillow 😐#milva reasons just imagine someone you hate on the other end. she imagined beating the crap out of her stepfather 👍#regis still reluctant to join | geralt gets an idea and smiles—imagine the guy who coined the term ‘undead’#wrath of eons unleashed#regis after knocking geralt off his feet with a pillow: am i doing it right ☺️#meanwhile nilfgaardian spy watching them from the bushes:#‘i was going to report on them but it looks as though they’ve all gone insane’#‘or maybe they were like that all along’#the elbow-high diaries
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you know shits starting to get bad here when you start to stop interacting with posts because your paranoid your going to incur op’s wrath because your on their dni you didn’t know existed
#talk away ⌞🍵🍋 ⌝#my brain automatically corrected dni to dna#which#sure why not#dni#dni culture#proship#profiction#anti harassment#fandom spaces#fandom#fandom discussion#fandom discourse#sort of#this is gonna become a#swinging a bat at a hornet's nest#post huh#hey could you tell I’m starting to dislike dni’s?#I get why people have them#I really do#I used to have one#but#idk I’m starting to think they’re kinda pointless…?#and a lot of people (including myself when I had mine) just don’t really follow them#like idk#I’d rather just block a person who’s interacting with my blog in a way I’m not comfortable with#rather than expecting other people to that themselves for me y’know?#this hasn’t happened to me#but hahaha#I am terrified it will
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i dont need therapy or medication i need it to be 2007. i need it to be my full time job to learn and explore and be curious about the world around me again
#crayon on envelope#i cant do any of that shit when i gotta have a job#i really miss when all i had to do was go to school#like i didnt realize how good i had it at the time#go in for like six hours and still have time and sunlight to do what i wanted when i got home#weekends off where all your friends Also have it off so you can organize hanging out#the whole summer to yourself#honestly i feel like id be doing so much better psychologically if i could have summer vacation again lol#bc at least then i was working towards something#just gotta get through the year so i can enjoy my summer#now its like. why am i even doing all of this#why is my only goal to suffer till i get a paycheck#and i dont even get to keep most of it#pointless luv litchrally pointless
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Just finished the third season of Bridgerton (it was an incredibly frustrating watch)...People have said that Penelope is named as such because of her nickname Pen and her being a writer... but has anyone thought of the reference to the Odyssey and Penelope being the wife of Odysseus? You know, she had to be loyal for 20 years while Odysseus gallivanted across the globe and was distracted/cheating on her Circe? I feel like it goes with the whole Polin narrative too. She's the one who had to wait for him to get a clue. And if you've read the Penguin version of the Odyssey, you know everyone is like omg! Odysseus, so amazing, the sacker of cities etc. Which parallels Colin's "glow up". Totally think it's more of a literary reference since the two of them are writers...
#bridgerton#bridgerton season 3#colin bridgerton#penelope featherington#polin#don't know how much this works for the book#didn't read the books#I ranted at my sister for an hour straight about this season (behated)#wtf was the character arcs for any of the characters this season? a whole lot of nothing..#the writers literally set everything up and then did everything in their power to make the arcs pointless#soooo many crimes of telling instead of showing#bridgerton was never high art but season 1 and 2 landed character and the audience buying into the relationships and cheering for the coupl#disappointed#literally feel like I hated polin in what was supposed to be their season#colin vascilates wildly... and there are like two scenes where i recognize the character he was is season 1 and 2#literally hated him for soooo much#really hate how the season wasn't about the couple but whistledown#and yet they couldn't show us WHY Penelope wants to keep being Whistledown besides telling us why so I just don't get why#they could not decide if whistledown is good or bad and settled on girlboss power!#but here i am like girl... you're ruining lives... you've ruined lives... it's just gossip#they literally screwed over all their characters for nothing#their scenes of intimacy don't land because they feel incredibly paint by numbers and often occur after intense confrontations#confrontations that do not logically make sense for sexy times#the mirror scene exists purely as plot so colin can later accuse Penelope of trapping him in marriage#like that's suuuuper ick#they made colin so incredibly ick i don't recognize him or want him with Penelope#even Penelope making the choice to be whistledown over her new family was insane and illogical based on how the plot developed#i watched the seaon twice to really pin down how I feel and ended up rewatching season 1 and 2 because season 3 part 2 pissed me off so muc#and it's sooo night and day#i just feel sad because i wanted to root for this couple too... but they made it unrootable
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sena 🤝 yujiro
older siblings (who see themselves as unreliable) who look out for and love their (relatively aloof) younger siblings unconditionally
#finally relistened to shortleg song off the clock and finally realised why i thought the vibe of the song felt so familiar lmao#it’s just watashi no tenshi with extra steps (pun not intended) isn’t it#imagine what the someya bros’ relationship could’ve been like if longleg hadn’t pitted them against each other in kabuki man.#this is all your fault longleg you need parenting classes :(#i’ll be waiting for the someya bros duet hw—#though come to think of it i wonder how mona and shortleg would interact in canon#lock yujiro and sena together in a room and they’ll probably talk about work and stuff all professionally.#lock mona and koichiro in a room together and they’ll stay in there trash talking yujiro for hours… maybe#now i wanna see shortleg become mona’s partner in yujiro-related crimes lmaoooo what if he ‘stole’ *that* cd from yujiro upon her request#or maybe they’ll be honest with each other about their feelings for their older sibs#like a ‘my older bro/sis is sooooo irritating… but i love ‘em and support their careers anyway’ kinda thing#now i wonder what shortleg would’ve been like in honeypre (rip) i want him to talk to ken too…#man. this sure was a pointless post. i think i need more sleep. gnnnnnn (it’s 7.30 in the am)#染BODY ONCE TOLD ME—
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The extent of possessiveness some people have on art that they post on the internet is crazy to me like, I'm seeing someone on art fight all caps serious business warning not to save image files of their characters UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. Like Oh no your character ref png is on another computer!!!!!! Who cares
#For an event that revolves around DRAWING EACH OTHER'S CHARACTERS no less#Like damn I thought your fursonae was kinda cool I was fully gonna draw it. But it would appear I am not allowed to place the PNG#into my drawing file so that I can have immediate visual reference rather than switching between windows every time I need to look at it.#So I guess I will have to pass on that one..... [lifts bindle sadly walks away]#I mean there's workarounds such as having the internet window open in a corner (or just not giving a fuck and saving the reference) but#like that kind of attitude fully puts me off from wanting to engage at all. Just such a petty and pointless degree of control.#LOL I MISSED THIS THEY ALSO SAY 'I HAVE WAYS OF FINDING OUT' UH OH!!!!! I dragged their character ref to my#desktop because I was so fully planning on drawing it (this was before I read that this action was a violation of the geneva convention)#So like if I disappear you guys know why..... :(
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Not to mention Voltron and Klance/Allurance in our year 2024 but I find it very telling how they didn't have anything planned for the ending and how they made Lance choose Keith on "The Feud!" by saying "He's our leader, plus he's half-galra so he's like, the future" when a season later he refers to Allura as "the best thing that has ever happened to him".
And yes, you can love somebody to death and yet think somebody else should get to be the one to live, logically thinking, but Lance is pretty much the most emotional out of all the paladins. He's loverboy Lance. He speaks and acts with his heart all the damn time and thinks about the people he loves first and foremost. And I am not saying this is "wooahhh Klance proof!" because we are pretty over that. Just saying it feels like they didn't have shit planned for the last season because Lance (a Lance who is in love with Allura, in theory, from the start) would have never, even if it's logically speaking, let another person that wasn't her get out of there alive. And even if he wasn't in love with her, he has said multiple times how much potential, strength, and importance he sees in her role.
So it is just stupid to make him vote for Keith and say something extremely damn endearing like "he's the future" instead of saying it about his romantic interest.
Not to mention that they could have easily fixed this if they wanted Allurance to be canon. They could've made the bond and conflict Allura has with Keith deeper by making her vote for Keith and saying he is the future for being half-galra (something that is personal to Allura and it would've made more sense for her to say and eat her pride and hatred towards the galra. Character development who?). Then it's just easy to make Lance vote for Allura and make him go "She's our princess and her strength is what the world needs and the universe would be lost without her" or some bullshit like that. And then make Keith vote for Lance because the joke was actually perfect and I have nothing against it and it's pretty in character for him to say "I don't wanna be stuck with him" instead of saying that he truly believes Lance is crucial for the future. And idk, make Pidge and Hunk vote for each other because they are best friends and it makes sense to reaffirm their bond (although I do find really cute and in character their original votes).
I am just saying what we already knew and is that Allurance was so not planned and they could've written a way better build-up. And look, it would've still been shitty and forced and awful but at least it would've been written thoughtfully. Kind of. Instead, we got... Deeper bonding between Lance and Keith? And I am the first one to say that they barely have scenes together with the amount of drama people make about their canon relationship but... Why give these two this moment (plus the other two only emotional and well-written scenes of season 8) that could've been great to build up another romantic relationship?
#pointless and wasted potential is what i call the last two seasons of voltron#okay i am so sorry for talking about this show again but look. i made a rewatch#finished s8 yesterday and i have so many stuff to say that i couldn't years ago bc i was dumb and didn't know how to analyze shit#but this is just-- this doesn't make sense in the slightest#we speak a lot of s8 being dumb but s7 is equally as worthless because what the hell was this#voltron the legendary defender#lance mcclain#allura voltron#keith kogane#klance#allurance#tagging the ship bc even if i don't like it this is pretty much on their favor like. they could've done it wayyy better#and i don't like the ship but damn people who did ship them i am. very sorry for what they did to you#honestly all the ships suffered in this show we should stick together instead of fighting what the hell was this#i do NOT miss this era of my life idk why i rewatched this
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Some losers are clogging the death note tags with AI art. DN fandom… please stop interacting with AI & hyping these people up. We have SO many talented artists constantly contributing to the flow of beautiful fanart free of charge. There is literally no fucking reason to generate DN fanart (unless you get a kick out of destroying the planet).
The person I just saw doing this was also selling prints, it’s literally a grift at the expense of the planet & especially toward people living in areas that the climate catastrophe is affecting the most. Please do not waste your time, attention, or money on AI.
#death note#death note fanart#it’s just wild to me that anyone would even think to do that when the fandom is still WILDLY active#there’s no justification!#also like… if you’re going to buy a print why the fuck wouldn’t you choose to support an actual artist?#spending money on an AI generated fanart is like half a step away from how pointless buying an NFT is. please understand this#sheepishvagabond-shinigamijack and yuzimi-online are doing this shamelessly#salgrart too i think (?) but there is no disclosure anywhere on their blog. It just reeeeaallly looks like it#i was only scrolling the tag for a few minutes and ran into those three so i am sure there are many more. please just block them#that sheep person is using ai to generate L piss kink audios please just fucking kill me#turning water into waste both literally and metaphorically. wonderful
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A theory I've read more than once is that this one frame of Lenore entering Hector's cell for the second time is proof that she is not actually enjoying what she has to do:
The wiki describes it as such: "Lenore has a sad expression when entering the dungeon to visit Hector the second time."
Also this, from a comment I found:
Like for example when she goes to meet Hector the second time, you can see sadness on her face when she is walking alone in the dungeon, but as soon as she approaches Hector she puts on a smile. I.e. may be she already knew she had to use the ring at that point and felt bad about it but didn't want Hector to realize that. A lot of such small animation details really provide a glimpse into what the explicit writing was lacking.
(edit: turns out that they were the same person)
Okay.
First things first: I doubt she has the ring in mind already. It's hard to tell because Lenore pulls it out of her ass with zero foreshadowing whatsoever, but with the way it was framed, the ring was likely a direct response to Striga's idea of buying mercenaries to make Hector unnecessary, which comes later into the story: Lenore even uses the information she eavesdropped from Striga as a way to lie to Hector about her loyalty to the sisters. In theory it makes sense, because Hector needs to be reliable to be allowed to live, but the ring is... a very poor solution the more you think about it, even if you ignore how S4 neutered it, because it only addresses one of the many logistic problems that come with forcing Hector to make an army of Night Creatures, and it's not the dead bodies/living livestock paradox. And going with the story, it's unlikely Lenore was already thinking of raping the ring into Hector: why would the sisters be amazed at her plan if they were the ones suggesting her to speed up things? And if Lenore came up with it, why would she be remorseful at her own idea? Did she have so little faith in her own manipulating skills that she already felt that she had no choice but to use "brute force", after one understandable incident? Then why even bother interrogating him to understand his motivations and needs? Just skip straight to the sexual molestation to make him believe she likes him. As I pointed out, that interrogation was not for the sake of painting herself as particularly caring: she was collecting intel, intel that she wouldn't need if her plan was already tricking Hector into slavery via a magic ring.
Second: that expression honestly doesn't look sad to me. I would be willing to give the interpretation some credit, because she's looking downwards which can be a sign of sadness, but after that one frame, she switches to this expression:
Now she looks mildly pissy, like the idea of talking to Hector is just soooooo annoying, ugh. She even has the sassy cocked eyebrow lmao.
Of course that can't be it, so I propose the most obvious interpretation: she's serious and deep in thought. That is because their first encounter ended up disastrously: Hector assaulted Lenore with the intent of threatening her, which pissed her off, and she assaulted Hector by beating him to an inch of his life, which is not the best way to win a pet's trust. So she's most likely thinking the best way to approach him again.
And I'll even praise a small detail: the first time Lenore fed Hector, she made him crawl towards her to eat from her hand. The second time, however, she tosses an apple to his feet. Both gestures are demeaning, but after that incident she seems to be more cautious towards him, and being more careful into manipulating him. I'm honestly surprised that her final solution is stupid as fuck when she can be intelligent when she wants to. real reason she's hector's soulmate: both of them have braincells like christmas tree lights :V
Third: oh, do you want to talk about explicit writing?
These are not freeze frame bonuses. The scene lingers on this expression on Lenore's face as Hector is screaming in pain over the ring she put on him.
So, you're willing to believe Lenore didn't want to use the ring but felt forced to because in one frame she has an expression that mildly looks displeased... but somehow you ignore this blatantly sadistic reaction? This screams, at the very least, "haha, sucker, I've won"; but add to this that Hector is visibly and audibly in pain, shocked and scared at the curse overtaking his body during a vulnerable moment...
This ties well with how she beat Hector to a pulp not just out of self-defense, but because she wanted to feel strong and powerful when surrounded by people who underestimate her - the writing might imply that she was offended that Hector too saw her as vulnerable and stupid, but she was explicitly laughing and mocking him while showing off her strength (a strength she doesn't display when, say, Isaac enters her cage: he easily intimidates her). You might read the implication that Lenore spoke about Hector so disgustingly to the sisters to be taken seriously as a vampire mistress and didn't actually want to dehumanize him, but explicitly, even ignoring the forced pet play that showed she had fun treating him like a dog, she reduced him to a "problem to be solved" when complaining about her woes, and when she could have apologized or explained herself she minimized or doubled down on the harm she caused, never once expressing any remorse or doing anything worthwile to make up for it (like, for example, talking about the ring and how it's a shame Hector is only there because he has no choice because she feels they'd be good friends without it: that would imply guilt).
In fact, going back to the moment when Lenore decides to use the ring, it is far more likely that it was in response to this part of the conversation Lenore has eavesdropped:
Striga: We can possibly push east as far as Lake Balaton before I run out of soldiers, but that exposes our Western border. Morana: Sleep. Striga: We can't do it without Lenore turning the forgemaster, and she's just taking him out for fucking walkies. Morana: She will land him. Striga: It's going to have to be soon.
Considering that it's shown that Lenore highly resents being seen as a stupid animal lover, it's far easier to think that this is when she got pissy and decided to use a quicker method, even if it destroyed all the hard manipulation work she had done.
One frame might paint her as a reluctant villain only trying to make everyone happy and being stuck between a rock and a hard place, but multiple scenes paint her as a vile bully and abuser who enjoys feeling in power and control, whether she uses kindness or harm to achieve her goal.
I'm sorry, subtext can absolutely enrich the understanding of a story or character, but not when it actively contradicts the text.
Do you want my personal example? I'll play the same game of overanalyzing expressions. When Isaac attacks the castle, Lenore goes to rescue Hector first thing, instead of checking on Carmilla. For one moment, she even looks torn on where to go:
I will praise this moment: this shows her concern for him quite nicely and that she believes his safety is the first priority, without having to spell it out - no declataration of love, no "you're too important to me", the action speaks for itself. However, there is also her reaction when Hector severs his finger to get rid of the ring, after he explains that "command and control flows through [him] to Lenore here and to her friends":
It could be simple disgust because, well, there's a severed finger and pools of blood lying near her. But I also see what the commenter saw in that frame in S3: sadness. Defeat. Lenore has lost control of the Night Creatures. She can't do anything to protect Carmilla and the castle. And she has lost control of Hector, who has gone behind her back and is protecting her at the expense of her sisters and home: he may chose to stay with her, but he also gave Isaac all the tools he needs to destroy her life. She's powerless. Everything she has worked for went up in smokes and was pointless. Which, as it was shown and told, greatly bothers her. (this is also why I believe her suicide makes sense for her state of being, an opinion apparently not shared by her fans)
I see all of this encapsulated into that expression that mixes disgust, concern and quiet, horrified realization: and it's also fully backed up by the context.
This leads to the message I keep insisting on and which is something that more people need to learn, and the reason I keep eviscerating this character because the writing and the fandom piss me off something fierce: abusers can care about you. They can care about your safety and well being, they can want what (they think) it's best for you. What makes them abusers is that they place more importance on their own need of control. Lenore wanting to save Hector because she pitied him, has grown close to him and eventually finds in him someone who listens to her doesn't at all erase in the slightest all the harm she has caused him: which, I reiterate, includes lying to him and taking advantage of his feelings and need for love to trick him into sex with the objective of placing a slave ring on him, and enjoying his suffering when she won - and when Hector called her out on this, her response was "SHUSH, YOU WERE HAVING FUN".
At the end of the day, she has never stopped behaving like a vampire, a creature whose definition of love is "acting to keep something with you for as long as you can". Even in her most wholesome scenes, like this one or the one where she pleads for more of Carmilla's patience, it's easy to see at the core of it all a need to control the situation and people involved, and reluctance to admit her needless cruelty. This is nuance, not "she's actually good deep down, pls ignore all the sexual abuse because it was for Hector's own good 🥺".
On one hand, it's true that when you do character analyses, you will always be biased, because you come in with your ideas and preconceptions. I am biased too, of course, you can tell. On the other, it's dishonest to cling only onto the most convenient hidden details to look like you have fully understood the text, when you dismiss the most obvious ones that are so obvious you have to actively try to.
#anti netflixvania#lenore thoughts#i am *so* tempted to tag the character this is the most i've analyzed her lol#ofc she *does* become a reluctant villain in s4 because oh no carmilla is insane now!#but that was stupid#and besides as i always say s3 lenore and s4 lenore are not the same character#see? this is what makes understanding lenore so hard and why there's still discourse#this is not 'nuance' or complexity. she's just wildly inconsistent™#i want to see what everyone is seeing but i feel like i'm reading an alien language#also yes i re-read the script to find the scene where striga talks about hiring mercenaries#her point makes sense#and making sure that hector won't raise an army against them in no way solves the paradox of using dead bodies to do so#as. you know. forcing him to do the work carmilla dragged him there for. since he stalled for six weeks without consequences.#i hate that fucking ring it is so fucking pointless and stupid#sure cool shipping symbolism but it breaks apart faster than this show's writing#it only exists to justify a rape scene that gets brushed off by the story and its fans and god it's abysmal
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