#and i havent seen anyone else say anything about that and i know they were following some other artists and i couldnt be the only one they-

[riptidesblog]

Ninjago artists,did you get an ask about a Lego worker asking permission to use your art or smth?To the person who sent that ask, it disappeared.

[iznyangwoni]

EASY TO LOVE | chapter twelve !

warnings: smut! mdni

After five days of not attending a single class, you finally found the courage to get out of your room. You did indeed fuck things up last friday and that ended up with your phone being smashed on the floor and not being able to leave the house for three days.

If it werent for your mother getting worried about you not replying to her text you would’ve probably stayed there another full week. But now everything was fine, kind of. You were staying at your mom’s house, you had just bought a new phone and Wonyoung and Moka were being sure to stay next to you at all times.

You can feel curious eyes on you as yoh walk in the hallway, and you cant tell if its because you have something on your face or because you’re repeating an outfit.

“Y/n.” You hear Jungwon call you, you turn around. He must’ve just finished practice since he’s still wearing some sweats and his hair and stuck on his forehead.

You dont even have time to say anything as he immediately takes your wrist, taking you with him to the locker room. Thankfully each person of the dance class has a personal locker room, so there’s no fear of anyone getting in. He locks the door and looks at you, you’ve never seen him so mad. “Where have you been?”

“Why do you care?” “Y/n.” You sigh, you’ve thought a lot about what to do with him. You obviously dont feel like playing anymore, so many things ruined this game of yours by now that if Jungwon were someone else you would’ve already let him go. But thats the fact, you cant let Jungwon go. You enjoy his presence and god, the way he kisses you…

“Jungwon i dont owe you any explanation, now can i go to class?” You get closer to the door but Jungwon stops you, his hand going through his hair. “No. Y/n do you understand that i havent heard from you for almost a week? You cant yell at me to not talk to you or touch you and then vanish!”

“You’re getting attached.” You cant even look at him in the eyes, you’re tired of all of this and wish you never spoke to him that day months ago. You need to push him away before this turn out badly. “Dont tell me you arent.” He gets closer to you, his fingers under your chin so you can look at him. “You missed me, didn’t you?” He asks and you chuckle sarcastically at that.

Missed him? You might have missed the way he touches you, but you didn’t miss him as a person. Its not so easy for you to just get attached, especially after what you found out. “You’re only going to bring me even more troubles.” as you say that Jungwon’s hands slowly start to wonder on your body, but you still look at him in the same cold way.

“I thought that was the exciting part.” he gets even closer, his nose brushing with yours before he moves down on your face, giving gentle bites to you. You try not to get distracted, but your heart is already beating so hard its becoming hard to. “You dont know how much i missed your pretty self.” His voice comes out lower than usual, even a bit raspy, it makes your whole body chill.

This is when you realize that he’s not any different from you. You’ve been manipulating and controlling each other this whole time, and now you cant let him go the same way he’s obsessed with you. You close your eyes when he starts biting your neck, his right hand on your thigh.

“Jungwon.. whatever this is… it needs to be over.” But not even you can believe your words, and he’s barely hearing you by the way his hands are slowly going up your thighs. “And what exactly is this, pretty? We’re not dating, we’re barely friends, nor you’ve ever made me touch you properly. We cant stop something that doesn’t exist.”

you feel his lips coming back to your cheek, before he bites your lips. You open your eyes slightly, he’s right after all, theres nothing to stop in the first place. you’re already breathing quite heavily, his hands resting under your skirt. you look at his lips before leaning in, he catches them in a kiss immediately, pushing you back to the door. Your hands on his shoulders meanwhile his grip on your thighs gets stronger. “Good girl. You look so pretty when you listen to me.”

He picks you up, your legs intertwining on his waist, his hands under you ass. He then sits you down on the washer, thank god this school is so rich to afford that. You moan when you feel his teeth sink in your tongue and then bottom lip, one thing about this boy is that he loves to bite. “Tell me if you ever want to stop…” He whispers.

Jungwon slowly goes down, your skirt is short enough that it makes it easier for him to slide his hands under it, his fingers playing with the hem of your underwear. You’re against the idea of doing anything in public, but this is a closed room, with no windows or cameras, you can let yourself relax for now. You feel his bites on your thighs, which makes you giggle a little, he really loves your legs.

Jungwon leaves a couple of marks on the inside of your thighs, your hand on your mouth so that the sounds dont get out too loud. Before you can even register what is really happening, he pulls your panties down and opens your legs completely. Your free hand goes to his hair and he gets up to give you another kiss.

“We dont have time for the full thing..” He says between kisses, his fingers already tracing your opening. Its embarassing how wet you are just from teasing. He then slides his first finger in, making me whine through the kiss, he doesn’t move it immediately, but you can feel his thumb already going to circle your clit. You moan, trying your best to not be too loud, its crazy how he already made you forget what you were talking about.

You bite his shoulder as your head comes to rest on the crook of his neck, he keeps pleasuring you slowly, pumping his finger in and out before sliding in another one. “Fuck.. i can barely fit two in..” You close your eyes, your hands still in his hair meanwhile he kisses your head and cheeks, whispering so much dirty stuff in your ear.

“Jungwon.. am close” He goes faster at your words, wet sounds all over the room, your teeth sinking on his shoulder are most likely going to leave a mark. “Let go pretty, cum on my fingers.” I doesnt take you long before you actually do, his fingers full of your juices. Your legs are still shaking when he puts your panties back on, Jungwon kisses your lips once more before taking a step back.

You take a few seconds to regain your composure, your head still dizzy from what just happened. Jungwon laughs as he sees your red cheeks, finding you very much adorable. “Fucking asshole,” You breathe out, looking at him as he changes his clothes. “I hate how good you are at distracting me.”

He laughs again, shaking his head. You finally find enough balance to get up, Jungwon looks at you, shirt in his hand meanwhile he is wearing none. “Am i distracting you?” “Dickhead.” “You’re gonna run out of insults.” You roll your eyes annoyed, how can he be so damn infuriating and hot at the same time you still dont know.

You wash your face and make yourself presentable again before going towards the door. He looks at you with a smirk on his face, it makes you want to punch him so damn hard. “Call me when you’re feeling stressed, pretty. Looks like it worked taking your mind off of some things.” “Oh fuck off.”

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author’s note hehe today we’re getting two chapters to thank you all for 100 followers!! i didnt even have this account until last week so this is so so crazy to me. Once again thank u all sm for the support <3

TAGLIST @unhakki @firstclassjaylee @en-verse @mxxninthesky @seunghancore @heeseungmyman @jiamini @yoonzns @wonswondrland @50-husbands @leaderwonim @aloloveswonie @f3rraribabez @jwonistic @ribbioniki @kyanmeai @ilovejungwonandhaechan @nat123c @yjwsgf @gyuvision @realrintaro @glxzillx @qettalos @rairaiblog @sakanelli-afc @nodiotter @haohaoshoe @vixensss

[jinbeisluffy]

I see so many posts over different social media platforms about sexuality/gender hcs for the strawhats and i want to add in my own two cents because i believe im very correct (but anyone’s opinion is valid so long as it doesnt go against canon coding)

Luffy - the most aroace and trans guy to ever BREATHE. i dont mean aroace in that hes somewhere on the spectrum where he can still be attracted to people, because he cant. this guy had never grasped the concept of romance and never will, because theres no reason for it to him. hes trans because i say he is, i dont have many reasons for THAT but its just the signals hes sending me. trans to trans communication trust

Zoro - gay. thats it thats the post. no but i dont ship luffy with anyone but zoro is just attracted to literally any man who is strong, thats his criteria and thats all he ever needs. is he aware of it? not at all, he has no idea that its not normal to get bricked up by the thought of other men

Nami - i havent seen a bigger lesbian in media ever, genuinely i dont think any other character is as obviously lesbian as she is. she loves girls unapologetically no matter what, supports all girls at the end of the day (cough kalifa) . i also hit her with the asexual beam because i can, specifically demisexual because i THINK so

Usopp - while i wanna consider kaya, i wanna consider sanji too and thats making me lean between bi or omni even if omni is a label under the bi umbrella. its more a question of if he recognises his preference for men or not, because he does prefer then at the end of the day. the ace beam bounces from nami to usopp because he too doesnt feel anything and doesnt think about it either

Sanji - oh my god where do i begin. maybe just the blatant queer coding of wci as a whole?? of course hes attracted to women, thats not an aspect you can remove or just toss around to being something else. he loves and respects women, but he is so QUEER. all of wci is just queer coding, its a queer story and sanji is a queer character i will die on this hill. he probably has some kind of gender issues too, what specifically? no clue, but he likes people of multiple genders and is in deep denial about it all the time he wont ever truly accept it but he can one day as a treat live with that fact

Chopper - oh hes a reindeer he cant really have a sexuality DID WE FORGET THE FACT HES HUMAN TOO ISNT THAT LIKE HIS WHOLE THING, NOT BEING A MONSTER BUT ALSO A HUMAN. HE IS BOTH? i dont have any specific labels to slap onto him, just that hes a people lover and encourager of literally everything. ace beam bounces onto him too

Robin - trans trans trans trans trans trans trans trans you will accept robin transfem into your life right here right now. she can like anyone, she has no label on it, she just likes people and cant bother with genders or anything like that. the ace beam actually skips her because if they were doing a hear me out cake she’d be the one putting all of the crazy things. freak. (lovingly)

Franky - HOW TRANS CODED IS IT NOT TO REBUILD YOUR OWN BODY TO BECOME A BETTER VERSION OF YOURSELF AND TO REBUILD YOUR LIFE IN A WAY YOU WANT, BUT GOING BACK TO WHAT YOU LOVED ABOUT YOUR OLD SELF, AND EMBRACING IT. literally, trans goals. he modified his body and went i might as well give myself top surgery and an awesome dick while im here!! sexuality wise hes a lover of everyone, but he has preferences for women (robin) but encourages all bromances (with brook)

Brook - THIS IS WHERE IM MOST PASSIONATE!!!! people can say that hes the token straight grandpa. but theyll never understand the joy of old gay brook had a romance with his captain, the joy of brook trying to subtlety let the other strawhats know he accepts them (he isnt subtle at all and everyone knows). look at brook in drag twice for no reason and tell me he isnt queer, in some way. the ace beam finally hits someone and its brook, insert skull joke here

Jinbei - very specifically old gay man who didnt really do much throughout his youth, he always knew he liked men but he never had TIME to do anything, too busy being awesome and a father i fear. now that hes with the crew he isnt automatically gonna seek anyone out, but hes also not gonna restrain himself from finding interests in people, hes being more selfish now and thats good for him. finally the ace beam hits jinbei and proceeds to fly off towards other op characters that i might talk about some other time

can you tell im asexual and love projecting onto characters with it !!!!

[isacksteban]

His Shadow — Strollonso (3) (2)

Fernando didn’t say anything after lunch.

He followed Lance through the halls like usual, hands shoved in the pockets of his old varsity jacket, but he was quiet. Not in a way that anyone else would notice — no one else could notice — but Lance felt it.

It made his skin itch.

“Not gonna comment on how my physics teacher looks like he’s three seconds from his heart giving out mid-lecture?” Lance muttered as they walked.

Fernando smirked, but it was barely there. “Nah.”

Lance exhaled sharply. “Okay. What the hell is your problem?”

Fernando gave him a look. “My problem?”

“Yes, your problem,” Lance snapped. “You’ve been weird since lunch.”

Fernando scoffed, looking away. “You’re imagining things, novato.”

But Lance knew him now — knew when he was deflecting, when he was hiding something.

And fuck, did that realization hit him like a brick to the face.

He knew Fernando.

Not just as some ghost, some dead guy from a different time. Not just as someone to argue with, to roll his eyes at.

He knew Fernando as more than that.

Knew when his smirk was fake. Knew when his voice dipped just enough to mean something more. Knew when he was watching Lance with something that wasn’t quite amusement, wasn’t quite curiosity — was something else.

And Fernando knew him, too.

Had probably already figured it out before Lance even had the chance to.

Lance clenched his jaw. “If you have something to say, just fucking say it.”

Fernando stopped walking.

So did Lance.

The hallway was mostly empty now, the distant murmur of classrooms muffled by closed doors. It was just them.

Fernando studied him for a long moment, dark eyes unreadable.

Then, finally, he said, “I wasn’t weird. You were.”

Lance’s stomach twisted. “What?”

Fernando tilted his head. “You lied.”

Lance’s throat went dry. Of course.

Fernando took a slow step forward, gaze locked onto his. “I was sitting right there, Lance.” His voice was quiet now, arms roughly motioning to his side. Steady. Dangerous. “And you said girl.”

Lance felt lightheaded. He forced out a shaky laugh, backing up slightly. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Fernando didn’t stop moving. “Don’t you?”

Lance hated the way his breath hitched. Hated the way Fernando looked at him now — like he was figuring it out, putting the pieces together, fitting them into place in a way Lance had spent his whole life avoiding.

Lance swallowed. “I— I was just playing along. Esteban— he—”

Fernando rolled his eyes. “Oh, please.”

Lance could feel his pulse in his throat. “Fernando—”

“Do you think I don’t see you?” Fernando interrupted, voice sharp now. “Do you think I haven’t been seeing you?”

Lance’s heart slammed against his ribs. “What the fuck does that mean?”

Fernando let out a dry, humorless laugh — it almost hurt. “It means,” he said, stepping even closer — too close — “that I’ve been watching you look for me first thing every morning. That I’ve seen the way you react when I touch you. That I fucking felt the way you held onto me in the locker room.”

Lance couldn’t breathe.

Fernando’s voice softened, but it was so much worse.

“I havent felt this way in nearly seventeen years but this isn't a feeling you just forget. I know what it looks like when someone wants something,” he murmured. “And it doesn’t look like nothing.”

Lance felt dizzy.

This was it. The edge of the cliff, the thing he had refused to say, refused to let himself want.

It wasn’t nothing.

And they both knew it.

But Lance — Lance wasn’t ready for this.

So he did what he did best.

He ran.

Pushed past Fernando, stormed down the hallway, ignored the way his vision blurred at the edges.

He couldn’t do this.

Not now.

Maybe not ever.

Lance didn’t stop moving.

He stormed down the hall, feet slamming against the tile, ignoring the sting in his eyes, the burn in his throat, the fact that his hands wouldn’t stop shaking.

I know what it looks like when someone wants something.

Fernando’s words echoed in his head, looping over and over until he felt like he was going to choke on them.

And it doesn’t look like nothing.

Lance barely made it to the front office before he pulled out his phone and dialed. His fingers felt numb against the screen.

The call rang once. Twice.

Then his father picked up. “Lance?”

Lance swallowed down the lump in his throat, forcing his voice to sound normal. “Hey, um… can you come pick me up?”

A pause. “Why?”

“I—” Lance exhaled shakily, gripping the edge of the counter. “I’m sick.”

Another pause. Longer this time.

Lance could hear the skepticism on the other end of the line. His father didn’t like excuses. He didn’t like anything that sounded weak.

“You were fine this morning,” his father said.

Lance squeezed his eyes shut. “Yeah, well, I’m not now.”

Silence. Then, finally— “I’ll be there in fifteen.” The line went dead.

Lance let out a breath, pressing his forehead against the wall for a second before forcing himself to turn to the secretary. “I just called my dad,” he muttered. “He’s coming.”

She barely looked up from her computer. “Alright, honey. Just sit tight.”

Lance nodded, turning away, but his stomach twisted hard, and suddenly, the office felt too bright, too warm, too much.

Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck—

He bolted for the bathroom.

The stall door slammed behind him just as he dropped to his knees, heaving into the toilet. His stomach clenched violently, his whole body shaking as bile burned up his throat.

It wouldn’t stop.

Because every time he shut his eyes, all he could see was Fernando.

Standing too close. Looking at him like he knew.

I haven’t felt this way in nearly seventeen years, but this isn’t a feeling you just forget.

Lance gagged, gripping the sides of the toilet, gasping for air between dry heaves. His skin felt clammy, hot and cold all at once.

This wasn’t happening.

This couldn’t be happening.

Because if Fernando was right — if Lance was right — then what the fuck was he supposed to do?

He was in love with a ghost and no matter how much he wanted it — no matter how much Fernando wanted him back — there was no future here. No way forward.

It was impossible.

It was going to kill him.

Lance wiped his mouth with the back of his sleeve, resting his forehead against his arm, chest rising and falling in uneven gasps.

He needed to go home. He needed to get out of here.

And most of all—

He needed to stop thinking about Fernando Alonso.

Lance didn’t know how long he sat there.

His knees ached against the tile floor, his forehead pressed against his arm, his stomach raw and empty. The worst of it had passed, but his hands still shook. His chest still felt like it was caving in.

The bathroom was silent except for his ragged breathing.

I’m in love with a ghost.

Saying it in his head made it worse.

It made it real.

Because it wasn’t just some stupid crush. It wasn’t just something he could push down, ignore, walk away from.

He wanted Fernando in a way that didn’t make sense. In a way that was going to break him. In a way that was breaking him.

Lance squeezed his eyes shut, swallowing down the bile in his throat.

There was no future here. No way forward.

Fernando was stuck. Trapped in the walls of a school Lance would eventually leave behind.

And Lance— Lance had a whole life ahead of him.

He was supposed to go to college. Supposed to keep playing, keep winning, keep going. He wasn’t supposed to want something that had already been lost.

His phone buzzed weakly in his pocket.

He barely had the strength to pull it out.

Lawrence:

Here.

Lance let out a breath, pushed himself up on shaky legs, and rinsed his mouth out in the sink. He didn’t bother checking his reflection. He knew he looked like shit.

Didn’t matter. He just had to leave.

The office felt too bright when he stepped back into it. The secretary barely glanced up as he mumbled something about his dad being outside.

Then he was pushing through the front doors, the cold air hitting his face like a slap.

His father’s car was parked at the curb, engine running.

Lance barely hesitated before climbing into the passenger seat and slamming the door shut.

His father didn’t say anything right away.

Just looked at him.

Lance kept his gaze fixed out the window, his fingers digging into his hoodie sleeves.

Finally— “You’re actually sick?”

Lance exhaled sharply. “Yeah.”

His father hummed. “You don’t have a fever.”

Lance’s stomach churned. “I threw up.”

That got him to stop questioning.

The car pulled away from the curb, the silence stretching thick between them.

Lance barely noticed.

His head was still full of Fernando.

Still stuck in the space between what he wanted and what could never be.

And as much as he wanted to stop thinking about it—

He knew he never would.

Lance didn’t go to school the next day.

Or the day after that.

Or the day after that.

He stayed in his room, lights off, curtains drawn, phone flipped over on his nightstand so he wouldn’t have to look at the notifications piling up. Esteban had texted him twice. His teammates once. His dad had barely said a word, too busy with work to question why Lance had suddenly stopped existing.

Which was fine. It was easier this way.

If he stayed home, if he didn’t go back, then maybe — just maybe — he could figure out how to forget about Fernando Alonso.

Maybe he could convince himself that none of this had happened. That he hadn’t fallen in love with someone who was already dead. That he hadn’t thrown up in a school bathroom because he had finally let himself feel it.

But no matter how long he stared at his ceiling, no matter how many times he told himself to move on, Fernando was still there.

Not physically, obviously.

But everywhere else.

Lance could still hear his voice in the back of his head, teasing, smug, knowing. He could still picture the way Fernando looked at him in the hallway — like he had been waiting for Lance to realize it.

I haven’t felt this way in nearly seventeen years, but this isn’t a feeling you just forget.

Lance rolled onto his side, pulling his hoodie tighter around himself. His stomach still felt hollow, but he didn’t know if it was from hunger or something worse.

Because deep down, he knew the truth.

No matter how long he avoided school, no matter how hard he tried to push it down—

He was going to see Fernando again and when he did, he wasn’t sure he could keep lying to himself anymore.

By Monday, Lance knew he couldn’t avoid it anymore.

His dad hadn’t pushed him about missing school—probably assumed it was some kind of stress thing—but Lance could feel the suspicion creeping in. He didn’t have a fever. He wasn’t coughing. There was no excuse left.

And the truth was, Lance was losing his mind sitting at home.

Because no matter how many days passed, nothing changed.

Fernando was still in his head, taking up too much space, haunting him in a way that had nothing to do with being a ghost.

It was pathetic.

So on Monday morning, Lance pulled on his hoodie, grabbed his bag, and left before his dad could start asking questions.

The bus ride to school felt wrong.

Because for the past week, Lance had been walking around in silence. He hadn’t had to brace himself for Fernando’s voice in his ear, hadn’t had to see him leaning against lockers like he owned the place.

But now—now he was going back, and he knew exactly what was waiting for him.

Lance’s stomach twisted as he stepped onto campus.

The second he passed through the front doors, it was like the air changed. The walls felt heavier, the hallways too familiar.

And worse — Lance could feel him.

He didn’t see Fernando right away. But he knew he was there. Watching. Waiting.

Lance swallowed hard, keeping his head down as he moved toward his locker.

Maybe Fernando would give him space. Maybe he wouldn’t push.

…Maybe Lance was an idiot for even thinking that.

Because the second he opened his locker, Fernando was there.

Not standing beside him. Not leaning against the next row of lockers like he normally did.

No, Fernando was right fucking behind him.

Close enough that Lance could feel the air shift, close enough that if Fernando were alive, he would be breathing down his neck.

Lance froze.

For a second, neither of them spoke.

Then, finally, Fernando’s voice came, low and sharp.

“Took you long enough.”

Lance gripped the edges of his locker door, his knuckles going white.

He couldn’t do this. Not now. Not yet.

So he did the only thing he could do.

He slammed his locker shut, turned, and walked away.

But Fernando — of course Fernando — just fell into step beside him.

Lance didn’t look at him.

Fernando didn’t care.

“You’re not gonna run this time?” Fernando mused, shoving his hands into his pockets. “That’s new.”

Lance clenched his jaw. “Fuck off.”

Fernando laughed. “You disappear for a week without warning, and now you’re mad at me?”

Lance walked faster. “Not talking about this.”

Fernando easily kept pace. “Yeah, you are.”

“I’m not.”

“You will,” Fernando shot back, voice edged with something sharp. “Because you can’t fucking avoid me, novato. You know that.”

Lance’s stomach twisted. He knew Fernando was right. He did.

But that didn’t mean he was ready.

So he kept walking.

And Fernando?

Fernando just smiled like he had already won.

Because he knew — better than anyone — that Lance wasn’t running anymore.

And now?

Now he had nowhere left to go.

Lance could ignore Fernando for exactly two class periods.

That was it.

For the first half of the morning, he pretended everything was fine. He sat through AP Lit, barely hearing a word. He ate half a granola bar during break, ignoring the way Fernando hovered, arms crossed, watching him like he was waiting for something.

Then, halfway through third period, Lance made the mistake of going to his locker alone.

The second the hallway emptied, Fernando moved.

One second, Lance was reaching for his books. The next, his locker slammed shut right in front of him, Fernando’s hand pressed flat against the metal.

Lance jumped back, heart slamming against his ribs. “Jesus—”

Fernando stepped in close, cutting him off. “Enough.”

Lance blinked. “What?”

Fernando’s jaw tightened. “I let you run once,” he said, voice low, steady. “I’m not letting you do it again.”

Lance clenched his jaw. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Fernando scoffed. “Bullshit.”

Lance tried to take a step back, but the lockers were behind him, and Fernando was in front of him, and there was nowhere to go.

“You’ve been avoiding me for a week,” Fernando said. “You didn’t even tell Esteban why. And now you’re back, acting like nothing happened?” His voice dropped. “I’m not fucking stupid, Lance.”

Lance swallowed. “I was just sick.”

Fernando raised an eyebrow. “Sick,” he repeated flatly.

Lance exhaled sharply. “Yeah.”

“You ran out of here like the building was on fire,” Fernando said. “You looked me in the eye, turned white as a sheet, and ran. And now you’re back, acting like I’m just supposed to pretend it didn’t happen?”

Lance stared at the floor. “Yes.”

Fernando huffed out a humorless laugh. “Well, I’m not.”

Lance’s fists clenched at his sides. “Why do you even care?”

Fernando’s expression flickered. “You know why.”

“No, I don’t,” Lance snapped. “Because you’re the one who started this. You— you looked at me like you knew something, like you had me figured out, and then you said all that—” His breath hitched. “You said all that shit in the hallway like you were trying to prove something.”

Fernando didn’t move.

Lance’s voice dropped, raw and bitter. “So what? What was the point of that?”

Fernando tilted his head. “You tell me.”

Lance laughed, sharp and wrong. “Oh, fuck you.”

Fernando’s eyes darkened. “No, Lance. Fuck you.”

Lance stiffened.

Fernando took another step forward. “You’re the one who can’t look at me for more than five seconds. You’re the one who had a meltdown when I called you out. You’re the one who ran the second you had to face it.”

Lance’s chest tightened. “Face what?”

Fernando exhaled sharply, shaking his head. “You know what.”

Lance shook his head, desperate now. “I don’t—”

Fernando’s voice was quiet. “Say it.”

Lance froze.

Fernando’s gaze locked onto his, unrelenting. “Say it, novato.”

Lance’s throat closed up. His fingers trembled at his sides.

“Say what?” he whispered, hating how weak his voice sounded.

Fernando didn’t look away. “Say that you want me.”

Lance’s whole body went rigid.

The words hit him like a gut punch, knocking the air from his lungs. His head spun, his vision blurred at the edges.

No. No, no, no, no—

“Say it.”

Lance’s breath came fast, uneven. He tried to move, but his back was against the lockers, and Fernando was right there, waiting.

Waiting for him to break.

“I— I don’t—”

Fernando cut him off. “Lance.”

Lance squeezed his eyes shut. Stop. Please, just stop.

Fernando’s voice was barely above a whisper. “Say it, and I’ll leave you alone.”

Lance’s pulse pounded in his ears.

He knew. He knew what Fernando was doing.

If Lance said it — if he admitted it — then it was real.

And if it was real, then there was no taking it back.

He could lie. Could try to lie.

But Fernando wouldn’t believe him.

So instead, with his hands shaking, with his stomach twisting into knots, with every part of him screaming to shut up—

Lance whispered, “I want you.”

The words barely left his mouth before his knees buckled.

He would have slid straight to the floor if Fernando hadn’t moved fast enough to grab him.

But he did.

And for the first time, it wasn’t Lance reaching for him.

It was Fernando catching Lance.

Lance gripped the front of Fernando’s jacket, knuckles white, his whole body trembling. His head fell forward, resting against Fernando’s shoulder as his breath came in sharp, uneven gasps.

Fernando didn’t speak.

He just held on.

And Lance let him.

Because it was real now.

And there was no running away.

[formulawonu]

hello !! i like your writing sooo much <3 may i request how seventeen would be when they have a crush on you? tyvm ^____^

seventeen & crushes

a/n: hi!!! thank u so much for ur kind words!! im back i missed u tumblr world. i miss svt so much. sorry this was a lil too long :”) alexa play crush by seventeen rn

seungcheol: plsss HE WOULD ABSOLUTELY MELT EVERY. TIME. SOMETHING CUTE HAPPENS BETWEEN U BOTH 😭 and his crush would be seen in the tiniest of details. like if cheol knew he was going to see u or ~potentially~ bump into u he would make sure to wear more of his cologne that u once said smelled really good. he wouldnt tell anyone but he would spend a lil longer getting ready to make sure he looked good if he sees u. practices what he could talk to u about. but in front of u he would be so nonchalant 🥱 fml it’d be like “oh? y/n ur here?” HE KNEW U WERE COMING THATS WHY HE CAME GET OUT CHEOL

jeonghan: no bec hannie would be so cute :/ like he’d affectionately annoy u throughout the day because he just loves having u part of his day. he just loves talking to u. specifically you. it makes him happy and giddy. and he doesn’t think much of it until someone else (read as: shua and seungkwan) brings it up dshjfdf “so jeonghan ur lil crush on y/n is cute” “what ?” then he proceeds to think abt it and its a lightbulb moment and then he gets kinda cute and shy around u and ur like “jeonghan whats wrong with you u havent said anything weird these past few days its getting weird” he just starts giggling around u shut up 😭 then masks it by saying smth like “so you DO like it when i annoy u 😏 my masterplan is working” ok gaslighter

joshua: SWEETEST. GUY. EVER. like i think shua is the type to regularly check on you throughout the day or leave u good morning texts idek 😭 like he’d say he hopes u have a good day and then lets u know he’s free to talk at night if u wanna talk abt how ur day went haha just in case haha but its no biggie if you cant haha (he’s really overthinking this is he being too pushy????) and i think he’d realize pretty quickly he has a crush on you when he notices he likes being near u when u guys are in the same place and he’d be like huh this is happening! but who wouldn’t like them! would continue being the sweet guy he is and hopes for the best 🤞

junhui: noooooo my sweet junhui 😭 he would really remember every single thing you tell him. you have a test on this day? he’s wishing you good luck first thing in the morning or buying you breakfast/coffee before it because u can’t take a test on an empty stomach! you have a job interview or an event? he’s helping you get ready for it and practicing whatever could happen to help you prepare. u like this specific snack and he’s going to be seeing u soon? takes a pic of it to send to u then buys it so he can give it to u. he’s such a selfless and caring guy by nature and all he wants is to be there for you in any way he can. IM ACTUALLY GONNA CRY LIKE we all see how caring he is towards the other members can u imagine being on the receiving end of his affection

hoshi: this could really go two ways honestly lmfao he is either EXTREMELY distant from u because he thinks anything else would make his crush on u waaaay too obvious and he needs to be the cool guy!!!!! and he can’t do that if he cant get his damn heart to calm down every single time ur around!!!! or he could literally be everywhere u are 🤣 its like fuck the cool guy look i like her what can i do ??? like u show up to a party and suddenly ur like omg soonyoung ur here. “yea u said u were going so here i am!” or u tell him ur alone studying at a cafe and he shows up bec he “didnt want u to be lonely” 😭 honestly he has the best intentions he just wants to be there for u bec it makes him happy and hopefully it makes u too :””) grrrrrr

wonwoo: this one kills me because he’d REALLY REALLY try 😭😭😭 and i don’t mean this in a tries to be someone they are not kind of thing but he’d make so much effort to connect with u ://// like whenever he sees u he’d find ways to talk to you even if it’s the awkward “hey how are you” “i’m doing good! how are you” “i’m doing good too (◠﹏◠)” then hes internally panicking scrambling running around his head trying to think of what else he can say so the conversation doesn’t end and he ends up talking/asking about the randomest shit like so do you come here often NO WONU Y/N DOESNT THIS IS YOUR BEST FRIEND’S HOUSE PARTY YOU KNOW THEY HAVE NEVER BEEN HERE my god he’s so precious please take care of him please take care of his heart please love me back wonu *cue seungkwan imitating his laugh*

woozi: i almost teared up thinking about jihoon having a crush on u. my god like on the outside he’d be nearly the same he always is but those that know abt it see that his gaze flits ever so often to where you are when you’re around. just to make sure you’re okay. just to make sure you’re having a good time. just to see u smile bec that alone makes his day :/ PLZZZZ and every time u talk to him his heart flutters a lil quicker his smile is a lil bigger and the crinkles by his eyes come out a lil more. if ur someone close to him and u visit him in his studio regularly but u somehow stop visiting bc ur getting a lil busier these days he’d shoot u a quick text and be like why havent u been annoying me in the studio recently (thats code for: i miss you. i wanna see you. is everything all good with you?) KMN!!!!!

minghao: i think he’d be very honest w himself about it. like it’s just a crush it happens. these are minghao’s present feelings and he accepts them as they come ! my mature guy. he doesn’t try to force anything because he wants everything to just happen naturally!!!! ofc he makes it a point to say hello to you first whenever you come around and he makes sure to send u the name of that book he told u about and he could come with you to go get a copy if you’d like :”) ofc he thinks about u and how ur doing more often than he realizes. he just… he just loves the feeling of having a crush on you. it’s so exciting and new and the premise of being able to get to know you more and the potential things you guys could bond over is something so splendid so personal so special to him plz crush him back

mingyu: I DONT WANNA THINK ABOUT THIS BECAUSE MINGYU WILL NEVER HAVE A CRUSH ON ME but he would be so silly so cute so overwhelmingly charming everytime u are around. we know how clumsy the guy is but he’s stumbling over his words cracking the lamest jokes to make u laugh casually putting his arm around you when you guys are walking to protect u (hes freaking out should he have done that????) LIKEEEEE HE’D BE SO CUTE IDK IF U SEE THE VISION BUT I SEE THE VISION 😭 but he’d also be so freaking cool that u would never even THINK that he has a crush on you. because he’s just that endearing. he’s offering to bring you places because he’ll be in the area (he’s actually coming from his place) he’s hugging you a lil longer goodbye he’s calling you at night just to hear your voice he’s sending you pics of himself to update u on what he’s doing he’s so dhkjdsfghskjgf just one chance mingyu

seokmin: byeeeeee this man is the opposite of discreet hdfgksjfhdg but its the cutest thing ever 😭 the moment he realizes he has a crush on u he suddenly gets all shy around you always just smiling at you finding ways to be closer to you like maybe sitting across you when ur out eating with friends because it’s not too close but not too far and he could still talk to you and see you :/ he’s blushing every time u compliment him on something idek he’d just be so cute and flustered all the time ahshadajdh fr after he makes a joke and you’re like “seokmin ur so funny” he’d be like “REALLY 🥹” proceeds to make the same joke in variations just to make u laugh more and bec he knows u find it funny so it’s fool-proof!!!!! he’s making u laugh it’s music to his ears!!!! but would 9/10 panic if he was ever left alone with u and he isn’t that close to you so all he does is smile at u until u ask him smth and he can breathe a lil more and relax into the convo

seungkwan: awww seungkwan would be so comfortable around u. so caring. he’d look after you and remind u every day to take ur vitamins! don’t forget to feed ur pet! make sure to leave by this time so u aren’t late! but he’d also treat you like his best friend. like i think he realizes he has a crush on u while u guys are bickering over smth so stupid and he’s like wow i don’t think i would ever want to bicker abt something this stupid with anyone else :”””) hahahakillmenowhahahaha and he’d always be attached to ur hip when u guys are out like he’s just always looking out for you and is so carefree whenever ur there so it’s such a refreshing feeling for him to have someone like that in his life pls care for him back ;/ pls look out for him too bec thats the only thing he wants to do for you!!!!

vernon: mans is absolutely SHOCKED. FLOORED. like?????? he didn’t know he had time to have a crush?????? when did this happen?????? but then after thinking abt it for a while he’s like hm yea that does check out 🤣 tbh i think he doesn’t change how he is with you at all. it’s a crush he’s not in grade school anymore ! but alas it manifests itself in his life in different ways. suddenly he has to make sure you taste this amazing dish he had. he has to make sure u check out this dope song he found. have you even watched the world’s funniest movie (to him)??? there’s so much of the important and special things in his life he suddenly wants to share with you and he just cares so much about what you think and your opinion of things bec you’re so cool and he’s so curious about who you are and boom there you go mr chwe you DO have a crush so what!

dino: djhfgmhdgmf CAN LEE CHAN CUT IT OUT HE ISN’T GETTING MARRIED HE ISN’T IN LOVE ITS JUST A CRUSH GET UP!!!!!! this guy is literally overthinking everything. what should he do now ? does he confess ? are they the one ? 😭😭😭 slow down sailor u are simply fond of the person -__- he’s deep in thought and u have a member asking him whats wrong why is he so stressed and hes just like i just ruined everything my life is over i like y/n . BYE that shit spreads so fast whoever asked him is informing the gc and suddenly everyone is involved everyone is teasing him and he can’t do anything abt it because THEY ARE RIGHT HE’S A SUCKER FOR YOU 😭 would actually message u abt it and be like ahahaha hi how’s it going how’s your day been wanna hang out tomorrow miss you fml but he’s cute he’s boyfriend-coded just a lil lost at times but he means well 🤣

[reborrowing]

curses and confession, part 1 (Stranger Swap)

okayyy this has gotten past 6k and I really want to post so I'm just gonna slice it up since my chapters are usually ~2k anyways!

next | Stranger Swap masterpost Hollow deals with a witch after having an unprecedented close call while checking in on his sibling (probably read that first if you havent!) word count: ~1.8k contains: angst, fear, survivor’s guilt, self-loathing

Hollow

The property behind Glenwood Court apartments had an old, dilapidated shed that the owner mostly used for storage, when they remembered it exists at all. Amid all their junk and forgotten landscaping tools lived an unusual little man named Ely, though most who knew of him referred to him as the garden witch. 

He was a borrower by most metrics: small, secretive, and prone to hoarding any trinkets left unattended. He had a tail and the same sharp hearing you would expect a borrower to have. But he was also quite visibly something Other. Ostentatious, absolutely out of line with a borrower's instinctual pull towards the shadows. He had a love of light and glitter that accentuated the pair of iridescent wings that hung limply down his back. And the tallest borrower he’d ever met had still only been at eye level with his chest.

Most borrowers were afraid of him. Of course they were, they were such a naturally skittish people. But they had good reason to come visit him anyways. Ely was a miracle worker. Something out of a children’s story. A magician. A witch.

He had clients come from all over the neighborhood, maybe even further corners of the city, because he made trades no one else could. The last of your rice for a cloak you lost a decade ago. A secret for a pinch of luck exactly when you needed it most. Give up a warm enough memory and never go cold again. Odd trades for small impossibilities. The prices didn’t always make sense up front, but they always worked out in the end. He didn’t give out anything for free, Hollow had seen that much. 

She watched with a fascinated sort of disgust as the witch molded a stranger’s words into physical paste with a practiced hand. The stranger walked off with a handful of dust and a smile they tried to swallow when they noticed someone was looking.

The witch called Hollow forward. She swallowed nervously and took a seat on a hackysack across from the small giant. The shed was silent for a few seconds as Hollow tried to remember what it was she had planned on saying. 

“You’ve been here before, haven’t you?” the witch said through a thoughtful expression

“Ah, yeah. I–a couple times,” she said. Chai had dragged him here for a sleep aid during the pregnancy, and again shortly after Sunny was born for a sleep alternative.

“I almost don’t recognize you without the piebald. Are they alright?”

“Xe’s fine, I’m not here for…xe doesn’t know I’m here,” Hollow said.

The witch raised a brow as his lips bent into an impish smirk. Hollow tensed as she leaned forward like some housewife gathering gossip. 

“Making trouble, are we? Or are we planning a surprise? I promise I’m quite good at either, for the right price,” he said.

“It’s nothing to do with xem, I just had some questions. About magic. Just questions, I don’t need you to cast…it’s about something I saw happen to someone else, my sibling. Val? I wanted to know, how…did you trade with them?”

The witch drummed his fingers contemplatively against his work table in a quick rhythm, then shook his head. He didn’t remember anyone by that name.

Hollow bit her lip as she worried about where else magic might come from, but she wasn’t entirely surprised. The shed was next door and Val had never been the adventurous type. Not that Hollow knew about, anyway. She could hardly imagine them climbing through the fence. Although lately, every time she tried to imagine much of anything about her sibling, she fell back into nightmares about Val’s hands punching through the colony walls and burying her in rubble or…or worse. 

“Then, do you know where else they could’ve found magic? Or, however you say that. Bargained for it,” Hollow said.

“Other magic? There’s plenty, if you know how to look. I can’t say I know of many others in the area with my level of expertise, but I can ask around. What is it you think you saw?”

“I know what I saw, I’m not stupid.” Hollow said tersely. She glanced around to be sure there was no one who might overhear. “They were huge. Human.”

“Human,” the witch echoed doubtfully. Several seconds passed as the witch considered Hollow’s claim. 

“You saw this? Were they…solid, do you know? Real?”

“They threw me across the cupboard, so yeah, I’d say they were real,” Hollow scoffed.

“How curious.”

The witch smiled and golden wire bangles clattered down his wrist as he abruptly stood up to jump up onto the next shelf. His wings flared for a second, catching the candlelight, even though the jump onto the bracket was low enough that Hollow could’ve easily cleared it. She fidgeted with the frayed edge of her sleeve, not sure if she was supposed to follow. She didn’t really want to see the witch’s full collection of eccentricities.

There was a cluster of thumps overhead as Ely fumbled with whatever it was he was doing. It sounded like a bag full of pebbles, or maybe marbles. Some nonsense. Hollow hated believing in this shit, that someone could just break reality by waving their hands just wrong. There was enough to fear in the world without worrying about finding magic lurking in the shadows beside her.

The witch came back down a minute later, holding a book of scrap paper with messy stitches for binding. It was about half as tall as Hollow was, large enough to be awkward in even the witch’s hands. He sat on the floor and flipped through it, too fast for Hollow to try reading along, though she noticed there were a lot of symbols that weren't a part the alphabet she did know. A minute passed and Ely hmmed and shook his head, evidently there was nothing useful there for him either. 

“Did your sibling say anything about what had happened?”

Hollow fidgeted with her climbing floss. She felt the witch staring at him even without looking up. 

“I didn’t ask. We didn’t talk. I just ran when they saw me. And then they…that was when they threw me. I wasn’t there long,” she said.

“When was this, anyway? You went and saw your sibling without speaking to them?” 

Hollow hadn’t spoken with Val since she had abandoned them—10 years, give or take. Even when Ritos had shown up with Val limping along behind him, Hollow had only been able to stare. They were a ghost back then and a monster now. What was she supposed to say?

Sorry I left you with her, but I was sure she was going to kill me. Sorry I didn’t come back, but I figured you’d be dead. I’m sorry I didn’t do more for you.

Please don’t hurt me. I’m sorry.

“I came here for answers, not to be questioned,” she said stiffly.

“Patience, dear. I don’t know any magic like what you’ve described, and wouldn’t it be nice if I didn’t waste time finding you answers you don’t even want?”

“What does it matter whether or not I talked to them?”

The witch took a seat beside her as if they were two close friends instead of near strangers. Hollow flinched as one of Ely’s long fingers tilted her chin so the two were making eye contact. Unnatural. Everything about this man was unnatural.

“What does it matter? If you’re not on speaking terms with your sibling, what does it matter what magics they play with in their free time? Why are the answers so important that you’ll come out and deal with me?”

“It’s dangerous. Them, I mean, or…if they’re h—if they can pass themself off as human like that, they could come after the colony just like any real human. I don’t need to explain why that’s a problem, do I?”

“Fear? Then why waste time coming to me for answers? Your council has its ways to deal with threats, doesn’t it? Even humans,” Ely said. 

“I don’t know if I want them…dealt with. I don’t know where they’d even go or…”

“So what do you want from me?” the witch asked.

“Answers. I want to know what’s going on,” Hollow said stubbornly. 

“Yes, and I don’t yet have any answers to give you. How I go about finding them depends on why you want them. It will be a lot more work if you’re looking to imitate whatever spell they’ve used.”

Hollow’s face flushed—she’d thought about it, of course. She assumed everyone imagined being human now and then, even if they didn’t talk about it. Who wouldn’t want to know what the world really looked like from human eyes? And Hollow had a list of giants she’d love to confront face-to-face if given the chance: that girl, the leafblower asshole, the gardener, the dog owner across the street, the miniature maker…but it was a daydream. If this sort of thing was real, then dreaming about that sort of violence could invite it. She didn’t really want to fight every other giant that had ever inconvenienced her, even if she could do it without getting hurt. Aggression was their game. 

“I just want to know what happened.”

Ely tilted his head. He looked unsatisfied, like a cat whose prey managed to get out of reach. Hollow looked back down at her lap and took a breath. She didn’t talk about this. She tried not to think about it. There was no good to come of it, just crushed feelings and guilt.

“And…I, yeah, I worry about Val, too. I’m afraid of what they might have gotten themself into. I want to know if they’re…okay. It’s hardly a sin that I care about my sibling, is it?”

It felt like a sin. How dare she? After everything she had failed to do, how dare she claim to care? She’d abandoned them to a horrible fate and then lied about it so no one would find out what she’d done.

“Maybe this was a mistake,” Hollow muttered. 

Ely rubbed her back and for a split second, Hollow felt like a child getting pulled into her mother’s lap after a bad day. And then the overlarge borrower inhaled deeply, almost dreamily, and Hollow pulled away.

“I do love a good confession,” Ely sighed, “Even when the truth is so...plain. You’d likely be better going back and talking to Val yourself, but I’ll see what I can find out, without harming your sibling. Is this agreeable?”

“What do you want from me in exchange?”

Ely smiled, toothy as any predator. Hollow stood up to put at least a few centimeters of distance between them. 

“Don’t worry about payment. I enjoy an excuse to research with my kin and…this has been even more pleasant. I should have some sort of answer for you after the full moon, but you’re welcome to return any time if you need anything else.”

Hollow shook the witch’s hand to seal the deal, then hurried off the shelf. She didn’t want to spend a second more than necessary in that wretched shed.

~

taglist: @da3dm @whumpsday

[libelelle]

As you might have seen in your notifications, I REALLY LIKE THE TIME TWINS AU

Is there some fun fact that you can say?????

Just anything

OOOH I DID SEE!! im so glad you like it i love seeing people go through the tag like that (and BOY were you thourough. you found the first post i ever made for the au) im genuinely so flattered

theres a lot to say but not much that i havent already said.... from what i can remember anyways. as you know ive made a LOT. of posts about it.

hmm.................................. OH YEAH. SONICXSHADOW GENERATIONS. ok idk if you've played/ watch sxshgens but i can talk about how it + Mephiles baing there will affect it! under the cut to avoid spoiling innocent passerbys

Ok so the great thing about shadow gens is that it basically confirms what ive already said in this au about Mephiles being trapped in a timeless spaceless void (HUGE WIN ON MY PART!) which means not only is this game still able to be canon to the au, it also makes it canon compliant up to the time it splits away still.

Things that it changes... well It doesn't reallyyy make sense for mephiles to not have memories if he had them in the void. consequently this does change one detail i really loved: that he took sonics form because he couldnt remember anyone else. pity. my 2 options for this are either to force this, by making his escape from time prison result in memory loss OR i let him keep his memories and his form that he copied from shadow. i am biased in this situation because i loved the detail about his sonic form but i will think hard about it later to decide.

if he does end up having his memories, this doesnt change much later on aside from a more pointed and purposeful attack on Silver. Him drawing out Silver using the fire at his school on pupose or whatever. He also would target Shadow more fiercely than id originally planned, but i was thinking about doing that anyways. generally i think him having memories would be better plotwise, im just a little attached to the sonic thing.

next thing that changes is that because he saw shadow, i know have a reason for his escape. as we all know now, Mephiles just "wants to exist". Good enough motivation, but now i also have a prompt for Mephiles escape: the fight with Shadow. He was desperate to get out and that encounter with Shadow would be more than enough for him to seek a way out. so thats what happened. He lost the fight, Mephiles got desperate, then somehow forced his way out. Go him!

ALSO because of the way the time void is structured, Iblis might play a bigger role than i expected. Black Doom is like. fully automonous, as well as very other character from his past, so i imagine when Silver goes on his field trip to time prison, Iblis will be the same. that'll be great for character exploration for both Mephiles and Silver, once i start planning for that part

lastly... well this really makes my au akin to a Silver generations thing since Silver will be going to the void and scrambling through his own memories at some point. 3s a pattern. Not so much a change but it is funny!

anyways if you have any more questions feel free to ask : ] <- loves to get asked about their au

[buckgettingstruck]

okay since you twisted my arm about it 🙄🤨

we all know buck and tommy aren’t compatible. like they have the worst chemistry on the show i cant think of a single pairing that has worse chemistry than they do its just so dry they’re giving us nothinggggg

BUT. i 10000% in my soul KNOW that buck would absolutely not touch that man with a ten foot pole if he knew how he’d participated in the treatment of hen + chim when he was at the 118

which leads to two options as to how the narrative could have their relationship in the first place

1: tommy’s bigotry has been forgiven by the narrative off-screen and will never be addressed again (this is the most likely unfortunately) (especially with the bachelor party comment about knowing chimney longer + chim calling him for the backup from his team)

2: buck has no idea how tommy acted back then (no one told him?) (when he finds out it’s bones SOOO fast)

(i thought there might be a third option but i feel like anything i said could fit under the category of 1 or 2 but lmk!)

okay not to be a defender. but we’re forgetting marisol when it comes to worst chemistry i think 😔

and yeah it seems like hen and chim forgive him i guess??? idk if you’re talking about chimney calling him in s7 or way back in s2 when that whole neighborhood was going up in flames but idk. or at least they tolerated him 😭 i remembered the comment to hen like “i havent gotten your christmas cards” and how chimney didnt INVITE HIM TO THE WEDDING. AND DIDNT GIVE A SHIT AB HIM BEING IN THE HOSPITAL 😭 LIKE HELLO??? they also showed him being friendly with them in bobby begins again but hey we also know the 118 didnt become a family until after he left and buck showed up

i think it leans more toward 2 though? or a mix of the both? with the way they have tommy phrase things to buck about gerrard im assuming he doesn’t know tbh. not to make buck sound like a White Savior tm or anything but i REALLY doubt he’d let that shit fly 😭 and i feel like the way they wrote him in 7b as a mouthpiece to remind us of gerrard’s existence and little else is pointing the narrative in a specific direction. they keep pointing out their connection and tommy’s history so it has to go somewhere right?

something about the scene in 709 keeps fucking with me and i havent seen anyone point it out. he doesnt say SHIT to gerrard. we know tommy to be a pretty blunt character so why the hell didnt he? ik it was chimney’s moment there to clap back (and no he wasnt defending tommy he was defending himself) but he still could’ve said something too to show how different he is and they didnt do that. also they deleted his scene with hen for some reason. were they trying to show he’s still complicit or was it lazy writing?

the other thing is is that gerrard is fucking cooked 😭 like you’re telling me that the firehouse with the catchphrase “who cares” would give a fuck about that bag of bones. and arguably the only person who could be theoretically a part of gerrard’s Old Guard is both bisexual and the mf that wont shut up 😭

ultimately i want the gerrard shit to be about hen and chimney getting their comeuppance (and also eddie beating gerrard with his fists idc) but it feels like something related to gerrard might be what causes tommy tombstone tbh. like i could see tommy telling buck to lay low or whatever and buck is immediately like fuck that or something. otherwise tho i want the storyline to focus on other characters

[pommunist]

thank you for allowing people to vent their frustrations or discuss whats been happening in your inbox, a lot of qsmpblr from what ive seen wants to ignore anything besides brightest side outlooks and they shove everything else down by labelling things like the spreading of the latest updates as "doomposting".

i personally havent seen any actual doomposting (expecting the worst possible scenario, ex. "the server is over and will never come back") from anywhere besides a small handful of people who hate quackity on twitter, the closest i can find here is sentiments like "yeah i dont know if ill be back to actively watching every day even if everything is fixed" or "im so disillusioned at this point that im not coming back until we get concrete proof things are better" where its people personally deciding to (often temporarily) leave the fandom, not any actual doomposting or discouraging anyone to still follow the server because "theres no chance anything will ever be fixed".

so yeah, thank you for allowing stuff besides the most positive of takes in your askbox <3 im too scared to post stuff on my own because of the toxicly positive mindset on qsmpblr, so being able to vent my frustrations in your askbox really helps!

Tbh I don’t blame people who are complaining about what they see as « doomposting ». When you love something you don’t want to wake up every morning learning about another set of bad news on it, instead you want to believe that everything will be fixed and that you will soon be able to enjoy it like you used to.

However the situation IS bad. People are talking about negative things because they ARE happening. And it isn’t just some random drama like this is a situation that affected negatively on people, could even be considered breaching some laws and, also, be the end of the project. I don’t like saying that, obviously, but it’s the truth.

Saying it’s joever already won’t do any good but so will blindly hoping that things will be better. Tbh I’m happy that I haven’t seen much of both of these takes except from the extreme sides of the fandom (out of all the anons I got since it started very few were extremely negative, no hate to them btw feel free to vent in my askbox i just chose not to post them).

People can stop watching qsmp altogether, or just keeping to their fav ccs streams, some can chose to keep watching like they did before for X reasons, others are straight up leaving the fandom, it’s all fine, we just need to understand everyone’s perspective without jumping to judgement.

Side note : One thing I won’t tolerate here is hate on the admins who spoke up though (this + the usual assholery aka random hating, bigotry etc)

Personally I haven’t watched a qsmp stream since the situation was exposed but thats just because I don’t want to support the project rn and can’t enjoy the content knowing what we now know. That’s just me though !

Anyway rant over kkkk thanks for the nice ask anon ! Weirdly I think keeping track of the situation and answering so many people who had questions/wanted to air out their thoughts is what helped me not dwell on my own sadness regarding what’s happening ahah

[horrorscoupes]

speaking of hush

i know the “hush is a shade” theories are already RIFE on here, but i wanted to suggest my own idea for some variety :] (timestamped as always)

as an avid lover of the sovereigns and all of their shenanigans, there have been a few things gnawing at my thoughts for quite some time:

1. if the sovereigns under the river used the inversion as a feeding frenzy to glean more power than they typically would get from the natural progression of death via the river (“Was this your plan all along? Not to invade—but to feast? How much stronger will this harvest leave you? How long before something greater than Shades breaks loose?” [All Along 30:36]), then why, almost two years later, havent we seen ANYTHING else about that?

2. When Min’ara and E’Laetum are discussing the things that “lie bound in Death” they say this particularly interesting thing: “Their Prima seeks freedom from their prison.” “Give him a new prison instead.” [Held by Ancient Gods 5:29] which, of course, has always been assumed to be referring to one particular sovereign separate from the bunch

obviously this could be way off the mark, and i’m totally game to accept it if i’m wrong here, but i wonder (since they very easily created daemons and then, once rebelled against, experimented on humanity until they created vampires and empowered humans) if during their time in jail under the river, the sovereigns began to create something else. brachium refers to something “greater than” the shades that ravaged the E&E games during the inversion, which leads me to believe he was either talking about the sovereign themselves escaping OR that he referred to something else created by the trapped sovereigns to use kind of like they use shades to carry messages out of death (“Crafted, by what lies beneath the River, made out of the magic they siphon out of the waters. When they first climb back into the realm of the living, they’re weak. Running on pure instinct, draining anyone close to sustain themselves. To build up their strength. If they get enough, they become tangible, like this one. And if they get even more—a lot more, really gorge themselves… they start to actually remember their purpose. To be a messenger. An envoy. A voice, for what lies beneath.” [Blakes Truth 13:30]).

it’s been two years since the wolf/vamp storylines have seen the inversion and still we haven’t heard anything about the re-emergence of the sovereigns, because i really don’t think that the power absorption was solely to start breaking out. obv we don’t know where hush falls on the timeline just yet, but i think the fact that we also don’t know where certain people (project meridian cast, vega, regulus, blake to an extent, etc) were the night of the inversion is ALSO very important and interesting. <- i can talk about how weird and intriguing it is that we haven’t seen anything past inversion for vega and regulus for hours </3

so, if they’re using all the energy for creation rather than destruction it would have been incredibly smart to leave hush core-less. he isn’t a daemon, and without a core he has no threads linking him to aria. this means that not only can his powers be tethered to the metric fuck-ton of power that the sovereigns just absorbed by killing 1500 empowered people, in order to “rift” (idk what to call it. or if he did at all. anyways) he wouldn’t have to pass through the meridian at all.

so if he IS a new creation of the sovereigns forged from their power and energy, then it would make sense that E’Laetum and Min’Ara may want a bite out of him. they are starving and rotting away alone between terra and aria, and he is looking like a snack. which brings me to my second point: do E’laetum and Min’Ara want someone to bring them hush (in this theory a piece of the sovereigns waning power) to tide them over and perhaps lure a sovereign out of death? that’s a little bit of a stretch (and so is my theory linking hush and project meridian), but think that it’s something we could all stand to consider.

ALSO sidenote: i think that hush surfaces after the inversion while D.U.M.P. is still spinning over all of the deaths and distrusting the Chorus, hence why the deaths of several “articulates” (erik tell me what this means NEOW) seem to be going completely ignored/unnoticed. during the aftermath of inversion, D.U.M.P. and the Chorus are not friends, and it would make sense for them to overlook d(a)emon deaths while they’re still trying to decide if the Chorus knew that the inversion was coming

sidenote #2: the spellsong, which i’ve seen people questioning, has been defined as the binding between magic users and magic/daemons and aria/magic users to one another/magic to the world. to Me it seems like a somewhat broad term used to fill spaces, since no one in universe really knows where magic came from in its entirety. daemons use the term most often in canon, describing it as something they can “hear,” hence why i defined it as the binding between magic and the world. (“I can hear them. Every voice in the spellsong going silent. Every emotion being felt inside this… trap.” [Voices Gone Silent 5:08], “Your kind is a part of the Spellsong. Our harmony. And even if time has made some of my people callous, we still feel the loss of any voice, be it demonic or human.” [Comforted by Your Demon 14:15], “Most of the Chorus was… genuinely horrified to hear what had happened. They’d felt those losses. Heard those voices in the Spellsong as they went silent. Our people don’t always get along, yours and mine. In fact, I’d go so far as to say they usually don’t. But there’s a bond there that neither of our people can deny. And in those that I could read, they felt that pain.” [Consoling an Elemental and an Incubus 27:27], and “When you bit into him and he bit into you, your blood met each other’s cores. Each of your spellsongs met a counterpoint.” [You Bond With a Vampire 19:45]) <- these are the ones i found on short notice, i would be beyond thrilled to add more quotes to the collection

this is by no means me trying to shit on other theories, i think it’s so wonderful that we’re all here guessing. stay curious

[bi-buck-coded]

I have so many thoughts about how we get two sides of queer rep from Hen vs Buck (from what i can tell of the promo stuff) in this show but i dont know how to put them into words.

Something something we’ve always seen Hen proud and confident in her sexuality. Standing up for herself and not backing down because she doesn’t owe anyone anything.

Something something now we’re seeing Buck try to talk up his allyship and almost try to earn his place / prove he belongs. He doesnt seem ashamed of being bi but he’s seen himself one way for so long its almost like he has to prove that there were signs before this or else it doesn’t count?

And idk if any of that is true (we havent seen the episode yet) but i know that when i first came out i would try to talk up how there were signs i was bi all along because sometimes i was told i wasnt gay enough or some shit. So like im really just basing this off of my own experience. BUT THATS THE THING!! I get to do that now!! I get to watch this character and say “ive acted that way before and i know why i did it so maybe he feels the same way” now! Because theres actually a chance HE DOES.

Anyway i think that post got away from me but thats what i meant at the beginning. I have so many thoughts about these two different but valid and real versions of representation and it just makes me so happy.

[theslyvoid9]

YOU DIDNT REBLOG IT BUT FUCK YOU !!!!!!!!!

3, 4, 18, 29, 31

FOR KEIHO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AUGH WHAT THE HELL THATS ILLEGAL!!! BUT FINE I WILL TALK ABOUT KEIHO FUCK YOU!!!! heres the question list for anyone curious

for those wondering Keiho is my FFXIV Au Ra character who i love dearly :3

(hes usually more happy i just like this doodle jskdnf)

putting the actual response under read more because man it got long ^_^

also in the game i just finished stormblood so this guys story is still ongoing for me dkjfng (theres 3 more expansion packs, as of right now, for me to do)

okay hi to anyone reading this o/

3. weapon of choice? any particular reason they chose their weapon?Keihos current weapon of choice is a lance! Being a lancer/dragoon class so big pointy stick sdjkdnsf.

The lore reason for Keiho going that route when becoming an adventurer i feel is mainly.. he was most used to holding lance like weapons and tools and felt it was the most comfortable way for him to get his journey started.

While the main stuff for his backstory before the beginning of the game is still kinda cooking for me, i do think he came from a smaller village kinda away from everything so they didn't have a lot of fancy resources to go around for a ton of swords or anything so the main weapons for hunting were lances. But he most likely did some spear fishing and stuff with it as well and is used to farm tools like pitchforks and hoes and stuff so again more used to lance like tools than anything else! But maybe he'll change that in the future and try different weapons now that he's got the adventure ball going!

(the none lore reason is i just liked the lance class the most and i havent bothered to try out any other class right now)

4. how crafty/resourceful are they?

i'd say they get by well enough! He's not some mastermind who's going to outsmart and trap supervillains left and right....and he definitely has his dumb moments. But he has his cleaver moments as well, def can sneak by, deceive and ambush pretty well against other regular, non super genius, folk. And can contribute in plannings if needed for battles and such.

But i do feel his resourcefulness comes out best in survival situations, he knows how to navigate the wilderness pretty well, knows how to hunt and make the most of food to make it last as long as possible and overall just knows how to get out and not die when dropped in the middle of the woods. Or build a sort of camp/housing if for whatever reason he wants to stay out there longer.

So not really some trap guy and not going to pull some crazy stunts during fights but can survive solo out in the wilderness pretty okay.

With this he is pretty lost in big cities on the other hand sjhbdnfds (me making a lore reason to explain why im always lost in limsa lominsa B) )

18. their opinion on lying, stealing, and killing?

HMMMM now this is a rather nuanced answer considering... he is the warrior of light...Hero of Eorzea etc etc... so he has his actual beliefs, the thing he preaches as a warrior people look up to and the things he believes as a warrior whos seen some of the worst the world has to offer.

Overall he fights for a world where people dont have a need to lie, steal or kill and if pressured for a black and white answer he'd say those things are bad. BUT he gets why certain people dont have any other option besides lying or stealing or even killing and doing any of those things for a valid reason isn't going to lower Keihos opinion of someone even by a bit. No "there must've been another way" or "you should've toughed it out" nope he gets that sometimes... you just gotta do what you gotta do. If anything it just makes Keiho more motivated to be a good hero seeing what someone was pushed to do just to get by. So overall he looks at each case rather individually... after all he as a hero has done all of those things for the greater good so it be rather hypocritical of him sdjkfndjsk

He also gets that while some people have a valid reason...it isn't always a good reason to do sth like killing so again... just focuses on getting as much info and then makes a choice.

If anyone tries to ask what his opinion on white lies are he just completely avoids the topic saying sth like "arent there more pressing matters" he just really doesn't have the time to form opinions on whether white lies make someone inherently evil or good skjndf

29. are they associated with any particular element (air, earth, fire, water)?

Hmm personally i haven't really put a lot of thought into what element Keiho could be sdjknf BUT in game he does have the title of "Warrior of light" so i guess i tend to associate him with light, and Keiho being a Raen Au Ra (that just meaning he has light scales instead of dark scales like the Xaela Au Ra) who believe they are descendants of Dawn Father just makes the light connection more strong huh xD

And i guess i do tend to link him with crystals due to his scales reminding me of that and him having several interactions and a blessing from the Mothercrystal goddess

so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ personally haven't thought about it but theres some building blocks there from the game

31. do they like receiving gifts? giving gifts? what is their ideal gift?

Oh you chose this one specifically after that loredump i did on you huh

Okay lets take these one by one, receiving gift

Maybe back before their adventure days he would've like the occasional gift, never really liked anything to extravagant because ough you didn't need to, but small stuff like food or something handmade or some random material he needed, perfect. But after he became a hero and with every title he just.... stopped enjoying it, at some points just despises gifts all together, but not in the " i receive them so much" or the "i'm too good for these gifts" but more in the "hey i dont need nor deserve this :(( keep it to yourself you need it more :( " way. Along the way tho he also develops a weird "if i say no to a gift i'm being incredibly rude" mentality so that's when he gets super weird with gifts and wants to say "no, they dont need to go through all the effort for a gift for lil ol' me" but also the voice in the back being like if you refuse you're being rude!! so he just... puts on his hero persona and accepts it with grace.. so no one even really knows what kind of turmoil a simple loaf of bread just caused him dhsgfjukd and its quite literally nearly impossible to pry an answer out of him if you ever asked what he'd like for a gift, because the idea of requesting anything?!?!?! is just too much and he avoids the topic like the plague. quite literally need to corner him for a WHILE to get any sort of vague answer

my boy is stable :)

Giving gifts

He most likely won't have any sort of weird relationship with giving gifts but i honestly dont think he gifts a lot, he's more of a i'll walk to the ends of the earth for you kinda guy to his loved ones. But the most something like a gift i feel is he'll make food occasionally without being asked or he might pick up something from stores or similar places if someone mentioned it. If he was still just a civilian he'd make some crafts here and there as well (woodwork, jewellery etc etc). But with being a hero he most likely doesn't have a lot of time or energy for those sorts of things, and most likely mentally he isn't really in a stable place rn to be doing anything like that either way, but in the future when his mentality regarding being a hero improves he'll def be making some handcrafted stuff for his friends!

Ideal gift

This is a tough one considering all the above about him not even really wanting gifts sjkdlnmfk but

Before the adventure days, it probably would've been something really simple, like some tasty food or some rare material for personal projects or even just something handcrafted! something to show the other cared enough to really think what he'd like kinda thing

And that mentality does stay a bit for post adventurer keiho! He'd avoid the topic but honestly... getting anything non adventure related, just for keiho to have after all the adventure gear has been put away for the day like again some good food or a nice shirt or just...anything again to show that they care about keiho the guy and not keiho the adventurer who probably needs new chainmail under his armour. He gets something from the heart and he is going to cry guranteed

Anddd with that i have finally finished responding to this jksbdnfjhks

if anyone made it this far congrats! you get a bonus keiho

[sabrgirl]

Assalamu alaykoum sister. I hope you are good alhamdulilah, i am a 20 year old sister. I did put my hijab in 2019 when iwas 15, i had a bad past but 2 years ago i came to the right path alhamdulilah. I have t4ouble overthinking about my past, if maybe some pics ( very sinful pics) got leaked or something. I repented to Allah subhana wa taala so much, i started praying again and reminding myself with my akhirah. But i overthink so so much that maybe something got leaked and 4 years later i may havent found and iam living here peacefully while i may have been gaining sins and maybe my parents find out. 2 years ago when i started my deen journey again i didnt even remember. This days i have cried a lot and i do remember quite a few details about what happened when i sinned and i dont quite remember if that person had screnshoted those pics or anything. I am so scared that my sins may come to light or its just my mind giving me a hard time while overthinking. I am fully making duaa and crying in my prayer mat and i wanna calm myself but i dont know how. Any tips or duaa so i can have a relief and ask Allah for forgiveness and to cover my sins if they have been leaked online? Howncan i improve? Jazakallahu khair ukhti.

wa alaikum salam wa rahmatullah ♡. it sounds like you're on the right track, you're repenting, crying for forgiveness, and this fear that you have shows that you've changed from how you were in the past. Masha’Allah, Allahumma barik. that's growth.

'Say, “O My servants who have committed excesses against their own souls! despair not of the mercy of Allah, surely Allah forgives all sins. Verily He is Most Forgiving, Merciful' (39:54)

first, keep doing what you're doing - tell Allah that you're sorry and that you don't want the pictures to leak or be seen. ask Him to hide them and never let them be seen. show Him that you really have changed through actions (doing good deeds consistently, even if a little). but then also trust that He will forgive you as He is Al-Ghafoor, Ar-Raheem. one of His names is also As-Sitteer, the Concealer. trust that He loves you, is happy that you've changed yourself and have turned back to Him. why wouldn't He be? the pictures will only leak if Allah wills them to. nothing happens without His permission, not even a leaf falls onto the floor without His permission. not even the wind gently blows without His permission. so if they were to leak, it would only be on His command. so when you ask Him, As-Sitteer, the Concealer, to keep them hidden, trust in His power. trust in His name. continue showing Him that you've changed, continue repenting then let it go. find comfort in Allah's Mercy.

it's going to be okay. focus more on repenting for the sins rather than worrying about the sins being exposed because ultimately, you won't stand before anyone else on the day of judgement. even if people were to see them, you won't stand before them on the day of judgement. you'll all be standing infront of Allah سُبْحَٰنَهُۥ وَتَعَٰلَىٰ together. He is more important and He's already seen the pictures. so keep repenting and continue your deen journey but trust in His Mercy and Love. if you've truly changed and will continue to change for the better then i'm sure He would want to keep them hidden.

you're already doing all the right things. you just need to have trust in Allah too now. believe in His Love. Allah is as you think of Him. if you think that He is so Loving and Merciful and hears you pleading for forgiveness and to keep them hidden then He will keep them hidden.

at the end of the day, you can't do anything about the pictures now. there's no point stressing about it because it's out of your control. you can't control the future and you can't control the pictures being leaked or not. and you can't change the past. focus on the things you can control, which is your repentance and your growth. i.e the now. so increase your good deeds. do istighfar x100 a day. pray your sunnah prayers on top of your 5 obligatory ones if you don't, and if you already do, then pray some nawafil prayers daily too. read some Qur'an before bed. surah mulk every night for eg. or increase in your dhikr. pick a deed you love and increase it and when they become habits, add more good deeds into your daily routine. leave the rest to Allah. the past is the past. and the future is up to Him. just pray that Allah keeps them hidden, repent, trust in His love and forgiveness and don't sweat it. it's going to be okay. focus on the power you have and leave the rest to Him.

some pointers:

watch this video

hadith: "whoever conceals (the faults of) a Muslim, Allah will conceal him (his faults) in this world and the Day of Resurrection" (Sunan Ibn Majah 225)

dua to recite for your situation (do it every day, see if you find comfort after a while!): Allahumma inni as'alukal-'afwa wal-'afiyah fid-dunya wal-akhirah. Allahumma inni as'alukal-'afwa wal-'afiyah fi dini wa dunyaya wa ahli wa mali. Allahum-mastur 'awrati, wa amin raw'ati wahfazni min bayni yadayya, wa min khalfi, wa 'an yamini wa 'an shimali, wa min fawqi, wa 'audhu bika an ughtala min tahti (O Allah, I ask You for forgiveness and well-being in this world and in the Hereafter. O Allah, I ask You for forgiveness and well-being in my religious and my worldly affairs. O Allah, conceal my faults, calm my fears, and protect me from before me and behind me, from my right and my left, and from above me, and I seek refuge in You from being taken unaware from beneath me).

sending hugs ♡. breathe, pray, leave it to Allah and trust Him. He is your Protector, He'll keep you safe. believe that He will.

may Allah keep the pics hidden, accept your istighfar, guide you closer to Him and ease your heart, Ameen ♡.

[demadogs]

would love to hear more about your S5 Mike arc take

HELL YES!!! happy to share!!!! so some of these are genuine predictions with evidence from what ive seen in the show, but some of it is more of a fanficy kinda vibe of scenarios that are plausible but not influenced by genuine predictions i have. for those that i am confident in, i will link my posts explaining the evidence that supports my prediction. the first few parts are more genuine predictions and the later parts are just my brain making shit up.

also this isnt gonna be one of my “why i think this will happen” posts, im just going to write out mikes entire s5 story arc the way i see it in my head.

how it starts

so s5 starts out where we left off. mike and el still together but a little distant. theyre not fighting or anything but theyre not anything like s3 when they were constantly ditching their friends to makeout. people around them dont see an issue in their relationship but they both know its not what either of them want. (if youve read carry on i see them as how agatha and simon were portrayed at the beginning of the book).

the byers need housing back in hawkins and el wants to stay with hopper in his trailer while they work to fix up the cabin. the rest of the byers stay at the wheelers. jonathans sleeping in nancys room and will is sleeping in mikes.

mike and will have a couple more moments like we saw in s4 that could make it obvious that something might be up with both of them. maybe a conversation similar to the “hawkins isnt the same without you” scene. a scene of them both getting ready for bed talking about what they think is gonna happen next with vecna and everything. not the first night, but eventually maybe mike tells him to sleep in bed with him if will has a nightmare or something. little things like that.

the supernatural plot escalates and will and vecna have a deeper connection than anyone else. vecna is going to torture will in some way so im thinking maybe one of vecna’s methods of torturing will is to torture mike. vecna and will would have different interactions and conflict but mike would be vecna’d in the same style that max was.

how the audience and el learn mike is gay:

(this ones a genuine prediction. heres a post talking about why i think so but read it after you read this)

so now mike is cursed. no one knows including mike. everyones so caught up on protecting will because they all believe he is in the most danger so no one is looking after mike. then mike falls into that trance. (this is maybe 4 episodes in.) the whole partys there when it happens. el immediately puts on a blindfold and static noise and tries to piggyback into mikes mind to fight vecna the way she did with max.

mike doesnt know el is there while hes tranced. he doesnt see el the way max did. maybe el tries to touch him and mike feels a weird phantom feeling on his arm and he looks at it in confusion but he doesnt see el at all.

mike is in the mind lair and hes calling for will. he hears vecnas voice saying his full name. then he sees vecna and he starts saying shit about “friends dont lie” hes asking what happened to that motto and wasnt he the one who insisted that friends dont lie in the first place? “but youve been lying to everyone havent you michael”.

mike is shaking his head and vecna has him cornered and hes denying it but obviously terrified and he says he doesnt know what hes talking about and vecna says “you know exactly what im talking about. its not my fault you dont like girls”. and THATS the line that reveals to the audience that hes gay.

then maybe mike is able to run away but then he starts seeing shit. he ends up in his own basement and sees will and believes hes out of the trance and hugs will but he shrugs him off and tells him “dont touch me”. his eyes are all wrong and hes realizing hes not awake yet. vecna will starts calling him out on his feelings, telling him he would never love him back, that he doesnt even wanna be friends anymore. mike runs away and he just keeps seeing visions like this of everyone he loves. his family not accepting him. his friends not accepting him. el being mad at him for lying.

we are seeing els reactions to all of this too. shes been trying to use her powers to stop vecna this whole time. eventually in her pov everything goes completely black and shes in that weird void thing meaning that mike must be out of the trance. she hears mike panting and crying and takes off her blindfold and sees him awake with will holding his hand or shoulder and him looking at the ground.

eventually he looks up and sees el and at first his face doesnt change but then he sees her holding the blindfold and a pile of tissues with blood on them next to her and he connects the dots and starts to panic. will tries to reassuringly tell him that el was piggybacking trying to save him not realizing thats why hes freaking out. el says his name and tries to calm him down but he just gets up and locks himself alone in a room.

little pause for a second… listen. MIKE IS OVERDUE FOR A FULL ON PANIC ATTACK OK!!!!! we see will express his emotions every single season!! the last time we saw mike completely break down was in s2 when he was yelling at hopper. ever since then hes been trying so hard to bury his feelings and be someone hes not and make sure NO ONE finds out about him and now hes been outed to his girlfriend. he would completely break down. like full on sobbing, maybe throwing up. I WANT HIM TO EXPRESS EMOTIONS EVEN IF THEYRE TERRIBLE ONES!!!!!

el and mikes final breakup/ mikes first coming out:

mike is having a full on panic attack. hes on the floor crying and el is outside of it. he locked the door but el needs to see him so she tells him shes coming in and she uses her powers and opens the door. she closes it and sits next to mike on the floor. at this point hes silently crying and his hands are shaking but hes not as bad he was a few minutes ago. theyre both silent for a bit. mike speaks first and he whispers “did you see all of it?” el says yes.

mike starts to cry more and just starts apologizing profusely and el stops him by just pulling him into tight hug and he hugs her back for a long time. he starts telling her that he never wanted to hurt her. el tries to tell him shes not hurt right now but mike argues and tells her that hes hurt her so much in the past. he tells her that he made her feel like she was unlovable and that she was the issue when he knew deep down that it was him. that there was something fundamentally wrong with him. el tries to tell him theres nothing wrong with him but he insists that there is.

then el admits that she doesnt think she ever was truly in love with him either. she tells him that they both were just trying to do what everyone expected them to do. she didnt know any better because she had just left the lab and was still figuring out how to be a person, let alone a girlfriend. and people expected mike to like her just because she was a girl so he just went with it even after he realized he didnt feel that way. neither of them have ever been true to themselves for as long as theyve known each other. she tells him that he taught her what a friend was. and she missed her friend mike and wants to go back to that. mike tells her he wants that too and they hug again. (i want this scene to be the sweetest most wholesome breakup ever).

theyd also have a conversation of el being confused on whats wrong with him liking a boy. i think it would be really beneficial for mike to hear from someone who was never taught to hate people like him. it would give him so much relief to see potentially the number one person he never wanted to know just be absolutely baffled on why its a bad thing.

while theyre still hugging el says “for what its worth i think he likes you back” mike denies it and el insists that the way he looks at him says everything but mike wont even listen hes convinced he could never love him back.

then mike remembers something and asks a question. “what about the painting?”. els confused. she asks what hes talking about he tells her that will said she commissioned him a painting for her. “if you really didnt love me then whyd you have will paint me that?” she tells him she never told will to paint anything. mike is confused and telling her everything will said in the van. that he gives her the courage to fight on and he needs her. he asks what all that was about if she didnt feel that way and shes just confused. “he wouldnt even show me what he was working on. i told you i thought it was for someone he likes.”

“but it was for me.” el smiles and mike is still not convinced but hes kinda going crazy.

so now mike and el are broken up in the most wholesome way ever and theyre on better terms than theyve ever been but everyone thinks theyre still together. and mike for the first time thinks theres a chance will loves him back and he doesnt know how to act or ask him about it.

mike and will in the upside down:

(the only thing that led me to believe mike and will would be stuck in the upside down together was the upside down couch they sat on in the cabin. other than that this is entirely just what my brain came up with, not an actual prediction)

so skipping ahead, the vecna/upside down plot is getting spicier. shits going down. honestly im WAY better at imagining/predicting gay plots than scifi plots so i have no fucking clue whats going on with vecna and shit its just wild rn thats all you need to know.

i imagine almost all of them having to be in the upside down for some reason. then theres a scenario with some kinda monster like a demodog where they have to sprint to the gate back to real hawkins to be safe but the gate is closing back up. it would look like max’s running up that hill scene. theyre all getting closer and closer but then mike falls (classic) and will sees and goes back to him. the gate is closing more. he helps him up and they both start sprinting again but they dont make it. the whole gate closes up right when they get there and now theyre completely separated from all the friends and family and are alone in the upside down.

theyre able to defeat whatever was after them (will with a gun 👀) but now theyre stuck. maybe they get in a little argument where mike says “i told you to go on without me!!” and wills like “you think i would just leave you here!!!???” they both sit down against the wall the gate was on (like a brick wall or something). they try to come up with a plan and will brings up that maybe el help them some way and he mentions her being mikes girlfriend and mike tells him they broke up. wills very surprised about this. he asks if hes ok and mike tells him its better this way and he means it. (its now been a couple days since they broke up). they hear distant sounds of a monster and tells mike they shouldnt be here. theyre too exposed. (keep in mind mike is being kinda awkward because hes still thinking about the painting and what will said in the van that day and wondering if el was right and that will does love him back but he hasnt brought it up to him yet.)

they get up and make their way to the upside down wheelers house. they enter through the basement and its the same that it looked the day will went missing. the table is set up with the dnd campaign they were playing on november 6th 1983. mike tries to get comfortable on the couch but will just cant stop looking at the table. then he sees the dice on the floor with a 7 pointed up and they flashback to s1 of will telling mike it was a 7.

mike says his name and will remembers hes there and kinda startles and mike asks if hes okay and he just tells him that its just weird seeing everything from that day again. mike agrees. they get more quiet and tense thinking about that night will went missing.

mike brings up that they never finished the campaign. that he was begging his mom for the him and lucas and dustin to stay for 20 more minutes. he tells will he wonders if everything wouldve been different if he had stay. if vecna wouldve grabbed some other kid and they wouldve never known about this other world beneath them.

theyre thinking about that first night will went missing and mike asks if wills ok being back here again. he tells him its not as bad this time around because hes not alone. mike starts to get emotional thinking about when will was missing and he opens up to will about it. he tells him about how they all were there at the quarry when they found his “body”. will didnt know they were all there. he tells him that it was the worst night of his life because he thought he lost him forever. then he goes into talking about when the mindflayer had him and he thought he was losing him again, and then how will moved away. hes starting to cry because he has a deep fear of losing will for good and hes at a huge risk with vecna right now and hes so scared something will happen to him. will reassures him and tells him “im right here” and mike is silently crying and will just pulls him into a hug and they stay hugging for a long time. will tells him “im not going anywhere” while still hugging him.

they separate from the hug but still have their arms around each other and dont let go. its kinda awkward. mike is the one making it awkward. he looks like he wants to say something but isnt and is looking wills lips a lot and theyre so close to each other. will thinks he knows what hes thinking but doesnt dare say anything to ruin it so he just lightly nods his head as if to give mike permission if whats hes thinking is true. and then mike leans in and kisses him.

(IT HAS TO BE A SOFT TENDER KISS I DONT LIKE ALL THE MAKEOUT SESSION HEADCANONS I JUST WANT IT TO BE SWEET!!!!)

mike pulls back and at first he looks like hes about to panic but wills just looking at him with the biggest smile and it immediately puts him at ease. mike says “the painting was from you” and will doesnt know what hes talking about at first so mike continues “you said it was from el but it was from you” will confirms that it was. “and everything you said after…” “yes it was all from me” and mike kisses him again. (i also am imagining this as like the second to last episode)

(another more dramatic first kiss i have in mind is during a huge supernatural conflict and its just them and they completely believe theres no way theyre making it out alive and will is telling him that this is it and mike just kisses him right before all hell breaks loose)

post kiss byler

but of course we cant have nice things right away so theres a bit more angst before theyre a completely established couple. they fall asleep on the couch together in the upside down and in the morning they wake up and something chaotic upsidedown related is happening. again, i truly cannot even begin to guess/predict any of the actual scifi plot of the show so dont ask me what this is but its SOMETHING OK.

they dont even have time to acknowledge the kiss the night before or the fact that they woke up in each others arms. they have to fight whatever the conflict is in the upside down.

eventually they are able to escape the upside down and reunite with everyone. once theyre back with all their friends and family but mikes acting a little different again. hes shutting will out again and will is so confused.

(this is loosely inspired by the show the wilds. shelby whos very closeted and comes from an extremely homophobic family is on a deserted island with a bunch of girls and she falls for one of them whos out and she basically tells her “youre FREE here you dont have all that family trauma youre literally on a deserted island” so she kisses her. then later she sees a boat in the distance and she hesitates to make a signal with the fire because shes so scared to go back to her normal life with her homophobic family. mike is kinda experiencing that here. hes back in the “normal” world and is going back to trying to be who they want him to be, not who he just was with will.)

mike is kind of ignoring will when theyre around everyone. he deliberately doesnt sit next to him, he only talks to him when will talks first, hes basically scared that everyone can tell what they did. then will finally finds him alone and talks to him. at first hes hopeful and trying to be kinda flirty and make him laugh and mike barely has a reaction and then will confronts him.

“did that kiss mean nothing to you” mike immediately looks up from what hes doing and makes sure no one else is in the room and will notices. “what?” will tells him hes been different since they got back and hes acting like nothing happened and hes barely acting like theyre friends let alone anything more. and theyre both silent and will says “are we anything more?” and mike thinks before he speaks and then tells him that he did that in a world where there were no other humans. no laws, no expectations, no people to say that what they did was wrong. “thats not the case here.” and will gets mad at this and says something like “so what are you just gonna drop everything and be what everyone else says you should be?” mike doesnt answer and then will asks again “did it mean nothing to you?” and then theyre interrupted before mike could answer.

then later maybe the same day, mike is going somewhere to tell one of the older kids something or to get something related to what their big battle plan is and he sees robin and vickie through a window in a different room kissing and being super happy and flirty with each other. he stops in his tracks and just watches them and hes in total shock because he felt like there was no one like him his whole life and people like him couldnt be as happy as what hes seeing right now. he just continues watching them laugh while holding each other. i also think it would be great if steve was also there and he sees this former asshole douche being supportive of his best friend and letting them just be themselves so freely. he starts to tear up watching them. (this ones inspired by the book i’ll give you the sun this exact scene happens at a party).

that night mike and will are getting ready to go to bed in mikes room again not talking. will gets ready to sleep on the floor, a set back from when they were sleeping in the same bed. the lights are off and wills pretending to try to fall asleep and then mike whispers “it didnt mean nothing.” will turns and face mikes bed and then mike asks him to come up and will hesitantly joins him and mike sits up and faces him.

then this is potentially mikes most venerable scene in the whole show. he tells will absolutely everything. that when he and el moved he realized he was missing him the way he shouldve been missing el and it gave him the worst panic attack of his life when he figured out why. he stopped caring about himself and everything and everyone. he hated who he was. he didnt have the energy to hang out with his friends, to do his hw, to clean his room, to shower, to eat, and he stopped calling will. he just stopped doing everything. but what he continued to do was keep his relationship with el, and the more he did it the more guilty he felt. he didnt want to break up through a letter but he also didnt have the guts to do it in california and then when el confronted him about never saying he loves her he felt so much worse. he wanted nothing more than to actually love her. he hated that he loved will instead.

he tells will that he remembers how his dad would act when he went to wills house as a kid. how they overheard lonnie talking to joyce about them being “too close” one time and neither of them quite knew what he meant by that until later. he has so many little moments like this in his life of people letting him know that its wrong. that he is wrong. and he never ever thought will would be the same way and he never thought any boy could feel that way about him. mike whispers “i just want to be normal” and will says “since when are our lives normal?” and mike kinda laughs but hes also crying. wills holding his hands and tells him “mike, youve been through so much worse than being in love.” and then mike kisses him again!!! yes they have to kiss at least twice this is my mike arc and i make the rules. i could be more detailed in this whole scene but this has been in my drafts for weeks and i need to finally post it.

established byler/mike coming out:

then i really want mike to have a coming out scene with nancy or his mom but honestly id prefer nancy. i just think theres such a lack of wheeler sibling content and id really love if there was a scene like will and jonathan but for mike and nancy. i imagine them both being in the car on their way to somewhere related to the scifi plot and mike tells her that he and el broke up and they talk about that for a bit. and nancy asks if hes happy and mike says yes. and then mike starts to tell her why hes happy and eventually comes out to her but hes still terrified as hes doing it nancy pulls over just to hug him and its very emotional and sweet.

i also really want a scene of them coming out to the party but honestly im not sure if they will just because now there will have to be like 3 coming out scenes already. they might do the party instead of nancy or karen which id be ok with but they also might skip ahead and have them both already be out.

during the epilogue-ish scene they usually have at the end of a season after the supernatural plot has died i want another sweet byler scene. i love the concept of them going to prom with the whole party as a group but just mike and will find their own room to dance in and be themselves and feel safe. i need some fluff before the season ends.

AND THATS IT I DID IT IM SORRY THIS TOOK SO FUCKING LONG!!!!!

[xxxg0ryygurlll13xxx]

political hopelessness

the current state of american politics is terrifying, we all know this. right now i am once again crying over it. i posted on my instagram story awhile ago a post about president trump taking over the kennedy center, americas art institution, to censor it and ban "woke" plays and musicals basically scrap the arts and my bubbe my jewish grandmother whos family escaped eastern europe during WWII swiped up and responded

"this is what the nazis did."

that was about a week or 2 ago but i havent stopped thinking about it. i never responded. i mean what do i say to that? i know thats what the nazis did, i know that trump and elon are basically hitler and himmler re incarnated but what can i do? nothing. nothing thats what. im a 17 year old girl with nothing to stand on. the people chose trump knowing what hed do. this isnt surprising to anyone. a bill recently passed in the house that would make almost all married woman unable to vote (it said u cant vote unless ur name matches ur birth certificate).

no one seems to care though. people have stopped talking about these things. 3 more republicans did hitler salutes and all my global issues teacher had to say about that was that soon we'll be heiling the american flag every morning. my family didnt flee europe for this. they didnt pack up everything including their little daughter and come to america the land of the free for this. for nazis to come back into power.

im scared above all else. ive seen this before, ive read Maus, ive red Night, ive seen Schindlers List, ive been told the stories of how it started by my bubbe and zeyde and aunties and uncles. those stories all end with "never forget, never again" i dont want this. we cant have this again, to anyone. no one should be taken away, "go missing".

its all happening so fast yet so slow at the same time. massive layoffs, replacing workers with yes-men, pushing propaganda, outright saluting, making people pledge their allegience to one man who calls himself King, and sleeps with mein kampf next to his bed. weve seen this before. it wont be long until were all done for.

and yet i have an english essay due tomorrow morning, prom shoes to buy, driving lessons this weekend, a chem test tomorrow, life goes on. my world seems to be ending or at least crashing and i still have things to do. i worry about my bubbe and zeyde being hate crimed in florida cause i know no one would help them.

weve become the very thing we fought against 80 years ago, Nazis. i long for a time when the socially acceptable answer to "what would u do if u had a time machine?" would be to kill baby hitler. nothing is ok. it just keeps getting worse. someday in the next 3 years and 11 months i will have my i told u so moment, when no one is allowed to read anything not government approved, we have another great depression, and the arts are dead. i know exactly how we got here and i have a feeling i know how it will end, i dont want it to go that way but theres nothing i can do.

i will never forget when i woke up the day after election day to the news alerts that he won. frantically trying to find a source saying he lost, to no avail. going into my mothers room to say goodbye like i do every morning before leaving for school and as soon as i saw her i started to cry like a baby. she hugged me as i cried cause i was scared she told me "i wont let anything happen to us, well be ok" but i saw that look in her eyes. she had a sad uncertain look, a scared look in her eyes one that told me she was scared too. scared and sad. i walked into school and saw girls with their heads down on the tables weeping. everyone was sad, there was such a gloomy air to everything.

it rained that day. it was the 7th day of rain in a row. one full week of rain and flash flood warnings. it was so rainy and cold. my chem teacher talked about female scientists the whole class, my very cynical global issues teacher told us to get our popcorn ready cause it was gonna be a hell of a ride, i called my best friend when i got home he seemed sad too, but not the same kind of sad. sad yes but not mourning. we talked, talked about the future how uncertain it was and still is.

i know how he got elected but i still have such a lingering unknowing. i was so confident she would win "how could people not elect her??? she stands for all things good!! She has morals, kindness, she cares about people!" i got so blinded by my confidence i forgot the american people would never elect a woman. i hope in my lifetime we get a woman president but i think ill be long dead by the time that happens.

if it ever does.

[kingcunny]

im the anon who have that long alicent meta, the good one dont worry, but… can we be serious?

alicent’s entire life has been stirred this way but one man, her father. we can say she’s allowed to be angry but the way it’s coming off has always seemed weird because she’s mad at the wrong person. she can be mad at rhaenyra for not following the rules but those rules were forced upon her by her father. that way of society was forced upon alicent by her dad, why should she be more mad at rhaenyra than she is at her father?

and no one is asking alicent to kiss rhaenyra’s ass, we are asking that she leaves it alone like everyone else. she is the only one ready to kill off kids, her badgering about rhaenyra’s sons could easily lead to six people’s blood on her hands and seeing how squeamish she gets about this stuff and how guilty she is about everything, it’s probably best for her to just… be silent on this one too.

plus aegon isn’t getting robbed of shit, even he doesn’t think he should be king???

see i dont even really care that alicent is directing her anger at the wrong person. yes it was otto and viserys that ruined her life but viserys is her husband, the father of her children, and more importantly the KING. she could get angry at him but she doesnt have any power over him so theres not exactly anything she could DO to him. ditto for otto. but alicent is the queen and she does have Some power over her stepdaughter, this wouldve been more clear had they kept the age gap between ali and nyra.

is it FAIR for alicent to be directing her anger at rhaenyra? no! does it make sense? not really! is it good characterization and storytelling? YES!!! stories without drama are BORING! stories without characters being wrong are BORING!

alicent thinks rhaenyra has more ‘freedom’ than her but really theyre in the exact same boat. a boat that none of the men who are Actually responsible are in. but being in the same boat means that alicent can shove rhaenyra overboard. alicents misdirected anger and blaming people who arent responsible for her lot in life is a good story. its an INTERESTING story.

thats also an interesting point about how squeamish alicent is and yet still so gung ho about trying to get nyra and kids killed, i havent seen this mentioned before! you cant even claim alicent doesnt know the consequences possible, cause larys straight up tells her does she expect ‘the king to doom his dear daughter to exile or even…’ if things had gone the way she wanted them too, she wouldve been disgusted with herself. absolutely riddled with guilt. but she would still do it.

and aegon wouldve been MORE than happy to let rhaenyra or, literally ANYONE else, take the throne over him. its alicent that forces him into that position. its only alicent who believes her son is being robbed…