#and i got lucky with the pandemic making them desperate

[whoknowsyourfuture]

Look, there is a simple way to make sure employees are able to take breaks.

Hire

Enough

Fucking

Staff

But, y'know. That cuts into the CEOs yacht budget so we're not going to do that.

So, I've gone back to working at Home Depot while I'm going back to college right? Well, shit is about to hit the fan at Home Depot's across the country. A new policy has been put in place about warnings for not following your schedule to the T, which originally everyone thought only applied to punch in and punch out times. Which would be fine! A lot of people do come in late too often, or leave late, or whatever.

BUT. Home Depot also, technically, schedules what time you're supposed to take your lunch. But NO ONE follows this part of the schedule because you literally CAN'T. The lunch times are so random and rarely work with people's coverage and they frequently break the rule of getting a 30 minute break every 5 hours because of where they sit in a shift. Plus, sometimes they'll be super early in a shift when you just aren't hungry yet.

And the new policy? If you are even a few minutes off on taking your scheduled lunch you'll get an attendance occurrence. (Or half of one, depending on how off you are in your timing.) Once you reach 10 occurrences, which would only take about 2-3 weeks at most of being off on your lunches, you get fired.

Talking to a customer? Too bad, you must drop everything and go to lunch. In the middle of cutting a lumber order for a customer? Too bad. In the middle of a huge rush at the paint desk with no backup that actually knows how to work the paint machines in the store? Too bad. Driving a forklift? Too bad.

The policy goes into effect in a week. People are already crossing out "customer service" and "employee support" (or whatever that one is) on the little values wheel on their aprons. There's talk of a work to rule strike.

Anywho. Prepare for some chaos at your local Home Depot and be patient with the workers going forward. We're not happy about it either.

[ikarasu]

🍫Dark Chocolate🍫

Yandere Carlo/P x reader

Warning: spoilers, yandere behavior, broken bones, and death

Reader’s Perspective: 🍫White Chocolate🍫

Final Part: 🥀Tummy Ache🥀

Word Count: 2598

🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~

Love… I’ve only heard of it being described in fairytales. Yet my life isn’t a fairytale, it’s reality. I have never received familiar love. My ‘father’ was always so absent in my life that I don’t believe I should even call him a father. I remember reading fairy tales as a child and thinking to myself that I still had a chance to experience love. Until my ‘father’ announced to me the arranged marriage. My hope for love died that day. Of course… I guess I’m just cursed to never experience true love. The day I had to meet the one I was to betroth was a dreadful day. I knew that they were coming from some rich family who dabbled in the vehicle industry. I also knew that their family only were after my ‘father’s’ puppets. This love is fake, under the guise of a beautiful union to cover up its selfish purposes of our parents’ greed for success. Just like white chocolate, its milky white sweetness covers up the fact it’s not actually chocolate.

My ‘father’ and I went to their luxury home to meet. I begged my father to cut off this arrangement. Instead, he went on and scolded me, saying that I was lucky to be marrying someone who’s made ‘perfectly’ for me. I rolled my eyes as we got closer to our destination. At the front door, my ‘father’ brushes off his coat before turning and fixing my hair. The door opens and we’re greeted by Mrs.(last name) and Mr.(Last Name). Behind them, I spot someone around my age hiding shyly. Their (eye color) eyes sparkle and stare at me curiously. Just like they would describe in fairytales. I flush and turn away, reminding myself that this isn’t love. That I didn’t ’choose’ them, that our parents did this out of benefit. I was pulled out of my thoughts as I heard the most heavenly voice speak.

“Hi… I’m (name), it’s a pleasure to meet you” they said so shyly, it was cute.

I hadn’t noticed I didn’t respond until my father gave me a small nudge.

“Son, it’s not very nice of you to not greet (name) as well.”

I feel the embarrassment flood my body as I realize I have just been staring at (name).

“I’m Carlo, a pleasure to meet you”

From that day on, I knew I had to be careful to not fall for this fake love. I refuse to give my ‘father’ the satisfaction of receiving a successful deal out of this arranged marriage.

As the years passed I could never get rid of (name)’s presence. Always following me around like some lost dog. It was pathetic, their parents must’ve told them to do this. Yet deep down I couldn’t help but enjoy their attention on me. The devotion to follow me everywhere and shower me with compliments. Yet I always remembered that this love isn’t real. It’s just an illusion formed by our parents’ greed. Or at least that was what I thought until the petrification disease spread across Krat.

“Mother! Father! Please! We must take Geppetto and Carlo with us!” (Name) says desperately

I remember standing there as our parents discussed the ongoing pandemic. The (last name) family was planning on fleeing Krat until the disease died down. Yet (name) didn’t want to leave me or my ‘father’ behind. The tears and desperation in their voice as they begged to take us or even stay with us touched the parts of my heart I didn’t know existed. Yet I knew it wasn’t safe for them to stay. So I did what I had to do to protect (name) from this disease. It’s the least I could do to make up for my ignorance and cold behavior toward them.

“Can’t you see you’re not wanted here, (name)? Go! You would be doing me a favor by running off with your family of cowards.” I say in a cold tone, despite the turmoil it caused inside of me.

Seeing their eyes look at me in disbelief and betrayal hurt me more than any weapon could. But I steel myself and push them away to protect them. I’m glad I did because it wasn’t long before I caught the disease myself. Even now as I breathe my last breaths I don’t regret pushing (name) away. Yet I can’t help but mourn over the chance at love. If only I had looked at (name) and not the arranged marriage. Maybe in another life, we could’ve been so much more.

🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~Time Skip~🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~

I had only woken up a few hours ago and followed a voice to the Krat Hotel. No memories or emotions coursed through me. Only an objective to arrive at the Krat Hotel and find my father. The cold rain making my clothes cling to me like a second skin didn’t even bother me. Now here I am standing in the lobby talking to Sophia. I recognize her voice to be the one that led me here. She explained to me where my father was last seen. I took it all in as just information to get me closer to my objective. That was until I heard a sweet voice.

“Sophia, who’s the newcomer-“

I stop and stare at the most heavenly person I’ve ever seen. The gears and ergo in my veins move faster. Something deep inside my ergo calls for them.

“I-it can’t be…”

“Oh, (name), I want you to meet P”

Instinctively my hand raises to reach and hold theirs. I wanted to feel their touch and I wanted to hear their voice more. Yet before our hands could touch they pulled away and ran off. I almost wanted to go after them. Something insides me yearns for them, but I remember my objective and turn back to Sophia.

🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~Time Skip~🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~

I had just recently saved my father from the Mad Donkey before bringing him back to the Krat Hotel. Already he assigned me to get rid of the abandoned watchman at the town hall. I arrived back late at the hotel after successfully completing my objective. My father calls me into his office. I obediently arrive and he sits me on a chair before standing before me tiredly.

“Son, I’ve assumed you’ve seen (name) again?”

I nod but I can’t help but be confused. What did he mean by ‘again’?

“I know that seeing your betrothed again may have been upsetting, but do know that they still adore you.“

Betrothed? What was my relationship with (name) before?

“Treat them well, even if they’re a bit rough around the edges at the moment. They’ll come around sooner or later”

With that said I stare and nod at my father. Treat them well… if my father commands me, I shall obey.

Over time I notice (name) helping around the hotel. The way they would smile with Eugénie or Sophia when they talked. I wish that their smile would be directed toward me as well. Even the way they would coo and cuddle Spring made me want their attention more. Everything they did was so… perfectly sweet. Just like how I would hear Eugénie talk about chocolate. How it’s the perfect balance of sweet and rich flavors, something I wish to experience as well. As I collected more ergo on my journey I couldn’t help but notice something new about myself. The way my ergo would yearn and sing around (name) or even if they would glance at me for a second. The springs and gears inside of me would creak louder. What is this feeling?

One evening after coming back from my recent journey I couldn’t help but notice a figure heading to the library. My curiosity got the better of me and I followed. I quietly enter the library only to see (name) struggling to reach a book on a high shelf. It was cute seeing them on their tippy toes. I approach them from behind and grab the book easily. As our bodies touched I felt a shock throughout my body. The feeling of their warmth against my cold body was addictive. I wanted more.

“Thank you” (name) barely whispers before grabbing the book out of my hand and running off.

I stare at their disappearing figure with longing. After having this small taste I couldn’t help but want all of it.

The next few days I noticed how (name) was actively avoiding me. It was driving me insane not being able to at least enjoy staring at them doing mundane things. I was more distracted as my ergo was nearly bursting with want. Gemini had made multiple comments on my distracted mind.

“Hey pal, let’s call it quits early today. You seem… distracted. We don’t want you making a slip-up, not to call you sloppy or anything”

I nod before using the stargazer to return to the hotel. As I walked to head back to my father’s office I heard a beautiful melody playing. My feet walked towards the music and as I got closer I could hear the sounds of someone crying as well. Concerned, I turn the corner to the piano and see (name) playing the piano. The tune was beautiful and almost nostalgic. I really liked the melody and walked closer to (name) silently. My body felt like it was moving on its own as I kept staring at (name). Once they finished playing it felt like I was pulled out of a trance. Their crying was all that was left in the room. I couldn’t help but put a hand on their shoulder to comfort them.

“Go away… you’re the last ‘thing’ I want to see at the moment” they say resentfully

Yet something deep within my ergo told me not to. My body moves on its own and pulls (name) into a hug. It feels like my body has been wanting to do this, that it needed to. I feel (name) relax into my embrace before continuing to cry. All of their grief was laid out before me and I gladly held it all close to me.

From that moment on, (name) had become more softer and affectionate to me. Just as my father said, “They’ll come around”. This love blossomed the more ergo I collected and the more human I felt. Yet that all came crashing down after I came back from the beach. Those flashbacks of Carlo’s memories haunted me. Watching how easily Carlo passed upon (name)’s love until his last moments. It made me feel disgusted with myself. That’s when I promised to never let (name) experience being unloved ever again. So when my journey was coming to an end I laid with (name) one last time before fighting Simon. I promised to never leave them alone again. Our ergo was meant for each other. I whisper my promise to them before departing.

“I promise to come back… I won’t leave you again, (name)”

🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~Time Skip~🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~

I had finally defeated Simon and I stood before my father. He tells me how proud he is and that now I can finally be a real boy for (name). That I could fully love them as I was meant to if only I gave my heart. I nod as my father pulls me close and hugs me for the first time. I smile then I feel the sharp pain of my heart being removed. The last thought I had was of my love for (name).

I wake up once more feeling rejuvenated. My father is staring down at me with a smile.

“Father” I say happily as he helps me up onto my feet.

“Welcome back my son” my father responds joyfully

I hug him tightly as he leads us out of the building.

“Carlo, my son, you remember (name)?”

Instantly my heart is thrumming and I look excited.

“(Name)? Where are they?” I ask eagerly

My father smiles and tells me that they’re at the Hotel Krat, but that I needed to get rid of some pests that reside there with them. My body feels a sudden rush at the thought of making father proud. Before I could rush off to complete Father’s wishes he stopped me.

“(Name) will be very happy to see you again. Finally, you two can be united just as it was always meant to be. I saved this for you two just for this day”

Father pulls out two rings and I slip one on. The thought of having (name) all to myself thrills me. All of their love and affection will finally be all mine.

🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~Time Skip~🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~

Oh, the sounds of beautiful screams fill the halls. What a joyous day for me. Finally, all of the love I deserve is going to belong all to me. I happily walk to (name)’s room, the warm blood and oil speckle my body in beautiful shades of red and black. Slowly I open the door to reveal an empty room. Oh… playing hide and seek now, I love games. I silently search the room until I hear the faintest of breaths exhaled from the wardrobe. It brings a smile to my face. I rip open the wardrobe and pull (name) against me. Their screams are like music to my ears.

“My love~ I promised you I would come back”

I hold them close as I stare lovingly down at them. I love the way their fear makes them look like a cute bird caught by a cat. The way I can feel their heart pounding against their chest. They’re so excited to see me again as well!

“Let go of me! You monster!”

Monster? No, no, they got it all wrong. Why are they being so bitter? Where’s the sweet love from before? I feel them push against me weakly. This isn’t right… they’re supposed to love me. Then I realized maybe they just need to learn. They forgot how to love a human, not a puppet.

“Now, now, that’s not very nice of you, love~”

The tears that spilled from their eyes were so cute. So helpless and vulnerable, just proving that they need me.

“Father promised me that we were made for each other. So start acting like it, love.”

I feel them tremble in my hold before submitting to me. It brings a smile to my face. They only needed some ‘encouragement’ to open up to me again.

“That’s a good spouse~”

I lean close to reward them with a kiss. Suddenly I stumbled back as they smashed a vase against my head. I growl and glare as I watch them run. Fine. If they want to play a game of chase then so be it. I ran after them throughout the hotel. I’m impressed as they managed to run outside, but it’s about time I ended all of these games. I grab their leg before snapping it easily.

“See? That’s what happens when you’re not a good spouse. I have to clip your wings.”

Feeling the victory and joy at finally winning. I pull out the matching ring and slip it onto their finger. They’re all mine! All of their love is all mine! I can’t help but pull them into a kiss. They cry louder and it brings me joy.

“That’s right, love! Cry! It’s a joyous moment for both of us. Now we can be together forever just as we were meant to be”

(Name) may be bitter now, but I guess dark chocolate takes some time getting used to before it can be fully appreciated.

🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~🖤~🍫~

Notes: I hope you all enjoy this. I’m also sorry that this fic is way longer than the first one.

@jssy96 ~ @emberstoriesandtales ~ @justatimidcreator

[sixhours]

Chapter 2 - The Ghosts of Babylon

Series Chapter Index | Read on AO3 | Complete

Rating: Explicit, 18+, here be smut and violence Series tags: Joel Miller x You, Joel Miller x Reader, Joel & Ellie, mostly follows canon, LGBTQ+ characters, y/n is bi/pan, y/n is ~45, violence, pregnancy, abortion, medical trauma, emotional trauma, panic attacks, sex work, suicide, smut, slow burn, angst with a happy ending, hurt/comfort, romance, no use of y/n, reader has longish hair, Joel can lift you, smallish age gap (~11 years), I've probably forgotten some so please let me know <3

~*~

Boston QZ March 2024

You were one of the lucky ones.

After the initial outbreak and the chaos that followed, you were protected, ushered into a covered military caravan and housed in relative safety. You were only a resident, but your medical experience made you valuable. Most doctors had been infected in the early hours.

Most of them hadn’t run.

If you had been anyone else, you think you would have been shot. Instead, the military sent you to the quarantine zone in Boston, and you were drafted into FEDRA without ever having signed your name on the line.

Your cowardice in the face of danger was your saving grace, and you will never let yourself forget it.

You’re six years into the pandemic when you’re summoned to the colonel’s office for a special request. FEDRA wants you to travel to a sparsely populated territory outside the QZ and embed yourself there, do threat assessments, and send the intel back to your higher-ups. They frame it as an outreach program for recruitment and a means to get ahead of terrorist threats, but you understand the unspoken implications.

They want you to be a spy.

You protest, but it’s a half-hearted attempt. You know they aren’t offering you a choice.

You train for combat and survival. You learn how to shoot, how to run, how to fight, and how to hide. And then FEDRA packs you up and sends you off into the wilderness of what used to be Pennsylvania, joining a small outpost east of Pittsburgh. There are no terrorist threats to be found, only starving, freezing civilians, hordes of infected, and so much desperation.

You return, six months older and with only a few bruises, so they send you out again. And again. And again.

As it turns out, you make a good soldier. You don’t ask what FEDRA does with the information you find, and they don’t tell you.

On your fourth mission, you come back with more than bruises. The burgh of Everglade, forty miles north of a ruined Jacksonville, Florida, wasn’t as welcoming as you would have hoped. You’d been savagely beaten and sent back to Boston, less weapons and supplies, a walking warning.

Don’t fuck with us, FEDRA.

But there’s a hard seed of grit in you that felt fair was fair, that you deserved whatever punishment you got. You sutured your gashes, reset your broken nose, and took your next assignment.

~*~

By the time Joel Miller and Ellie Williams are staggering across the Jackson threshold for the second time, in the spring of 2024, you’re opening the door of your Boston QZ apartment to a man in weathered FEDRA fatigues.

“Hey,” he says, barely meeting your eyes. “Waller wants to see you.”

“When?”

“0800 hours.”

“Fine,” you say. He doesn’t respond, lingering in the doorway until you’re forced to ask, “Anything else?”

He ducks his head. “Got any plans tonight?”

“I do if you have the money.”

Unsurprisingly, FEDRA doesn’t pay well–doctor, spy, or shit-shoveler. But you’ve found other ways to get by.

The man– a boy, really , you think–reaches into his pocket and pulls out a crumpled stack of ration cards. You take your time counting them before pocketing the payment and stepping aside to let him enter.

His hands are on you before you can finish closing the door, greedy and wanting. You let him push you up against the wall, tipping your head to give him access to your neck, already tuning out his gasps and moans and clumsy thrusts.

~*~

Afterward, he’s panting on your mattress, and you’re fumbling on the nightstand for a lighter.

“You know those things’ll kill you,” he mumbles.

“Fascinating,” you respond dryly, finding the lighter and putting the cigarette to your lips. You allow yourself one long, slow inhale. You hold the smoky air in your lungs as long as you can, savoring that first and only hit, before tamping the cigarette out and rolling it up in a piece of foil for later. “You can go.”

You feel his hand slide over your ass and you flinch away, standing and gathering your clothes from the floor.

“C’mon, baby. I gave you extra.”

“Yeah, and you shorted me five last time. Go.”

He growls. “Fuckin’ bitch.”

You ignore this, slipping a clean-enough tank top over your head, pulling on your jeans, and heading for the kitchen. You’re putting a kettle of water on the hot plate when you hear the metallic snick of a blade behind you.

You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.

You tense, listening, waiting, until you feel the hint of a blade at the side of your throat.

“How about you suck me off next time and we’ll call it even,” he whispers, breath hot in your ear.

You dive to one side, wrapping the man’s arm with your own, knocking the knife away. It skitters across the floor, lost under the radiator. Your left hand grips the man’s wrist and pulls it back as you slam your right hand into his shoulder, forcing him down against the counter. You twist his arm until you imagine you can hear the tendons creaking.

The man screams in pain and surprise. “Whoa no shit I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m fucking sorry don’t–”

You slam your full body weight against him and twist his arm back and up with a sharp snap , his wrist giving under your practiced hands. Another scream, this one feral, as you release the man’s arm.

“You broke my fucking wrist you fucking cunt!”

“Fuck off or I’ll break the other one,” you pant, shoving him toward the door.

“You’ll fucking hang for this!”

“Yeah?” you spit. “You say one word and I’ll make sure your dick never touches another girl in this QZ because it’ll be sitting in a jar on my fucking desk.”

He sneers, but there’s no threat in it. He slouches backward with an angry sob, cradling his broken hand and fumbling with the door, all the while trying to keep his eyes trained on you.

You lock the door behind him and slide the deadbolt home with unnecessary force. 

Fuck.

~*~

Colonel Waller doesn’t look up at you when you enter his office, his greeting just a single word.

“Wyoming.”

You frown. You’ve never been west of Ohio.

“We lost an asset in Utah. Fireflies.”

“Shit.”

“Yeah. ‘Shit’ is about the shape of it,” he sighs, finally looking up from his paperwork. “We had someone in KC but they’ve gone radio silent. We assume the worst.”

“So…I take it the target’s in Wyoming?”

He nods. “We suspect several Fireflies are holed up in a town called Jackson. It’s big,” he continues, sliding you a sheaf of folded maps across the desk. “Our scouts…haven’t made out so well.”

“How many came back?”

He looks at you blankly.

None.

“We need to know how many warm bodies, how much firepower, do they have patrols and when, are they collaborating with anyone else in the area. We need–”

“I got it,” you say, pocketing the map, an aching exhaustion deep in your gut. “When?”

“There’s a supply run headed west tomorrow. You’ll camp with them until KC, then make your way in on foot. We expect radio contact every six weeks; if we don’t hear anything by then–”

“You’ll assume I’m dead,” you finish.

He interlocks his fingers. “Any questions?”

You shake your head.

He nods and goes back to his work. “Dismissed.”

[thedrarrylibrarian]

Several people have been kind enough to let me publish their thoughts on fandom, community, and queerness to celebrate Pride in the Library. Today's piece comes from @wolfpants.

Dear readers, dreamers, and purveyors of the glittering, gilded aisles of the Drarry Library,

Fandom life began for me at age fifteen. We just got our first family computer, taking pride of place in the utility room between the boiler and my dad’s boxes of tools. I had recently come out as bisexual to my friends at school, who, props to them, had all taken it quite well despite the small town we grew up in (I was very lucky, they were great - everyone else though? Not so much). Still, even with supportive friends offline, I never felt like I could talk to them about what I really enjoyed: watching Buffy, reading Harry Potter and looking for queer subtext (I could never have convinced any of them that Harry’s story screams gay allegory–no matter what JKR has to say on the topic back then or now), scouring bookshops and libraries for any sort of queer content I could get my hands on, desperate as I was to read something that spoke to me, to read about love outside of the heteronormative landscape of the popular media. I wasn’t just tired of boy-meets-girl; I had never identified with it in the first place.

The year we got dial-up internet was the year I discovered Livejournal. The absolute joy I felt, stumbling upon an LJ community specifically dedicated to roleplaying Harry Potter characters in queer pairings. Discovering, beyond that, that people wrote stories about Harry and my other favourite queer-coded character of the series: Draco Malfoy. And then it was Wolfstar (specifically Sirius), then Drarry again, and somewhere along the way my lurking fell off and I stopped reading fic for a while when I moved to London and settled into my first job, my first real relationship, and sitting uncomfortably atop my bisexual identity and not really knowing where that shift happened and why. All the while, I was pursuing a writing career on the more journalistic side: writing for music and film outlets, doing a little bit of secret creative writing on the side, dipping in and out of HP RPGs but never really—connecting. In “real life”, my relationship with my ex was falling apart, and I felt very disconnected from the LGBTQIA+ community because, even though I knew I belonged, I never felt like I could be truly me with anyone—perhaps because I was, unknowingly, still discovering who I really was.

When the pandemic happened, it gave me the breathing space I needed to get to that point. It brought me back to fandom.

It started with reading The Popular Wolfstar Fic Everyone Was Reading, and reopening my ao3 account to re-read some old favourites from over the years. It then unrolled to, hey, I have some free time, why don’t I try writing my own Wolfstar fic for my oldest, dearest friend (who I met RPing on LJ at 15!), which then turned into: you should publish this, and see what happens.

So, I did. And I made a tumblr account, and I lurked for a while, shyly reblogging things and scrolling through author accounts I’d admired from a very young age, astonished and really fucking impressed that they were still in the game. I read their new fics, I was drawn back into Drarry, and from there I discovered what a wonderful community this is, not only for its immensely talented creatives, but for its values as a inclusive, equitable, supportive, uplifting, and joyful group of individuals who genuinely welcome everyone with open arms and love. That, in itself, has made it easy to reach out to like-minded folks here, to make life-long friends, to chat to people who have been through similar experiences in questioning their identities (it is truly thanks to this fandom and the many discussions I’ve had with people here that I’ve been able to realise my identity as a NB lesbian). To write! To share! To not be ashamed of my kinks and to discover fun, delicious rare pairs! To look at breathtaking art and read some of the best goddamn writing I’ve ever set eyes on!

I have spent thirty-seven years on this planet. A good chunk of that time has been spent questioning many parts, pieces, and niggly jiggly bits of my identity. Who am I? What am I? Is there anyone out there who is just like me?

After many years of searching in the dark, of asking these questions over and over, I can joyously say that the answer is: yes. And oh, how thankful I am for that, for all of you, because fandom has really been the community I can categorically point to and say: they did that for me, we did that for we, and I will do anything for you.

Happy pride.

Thank you, Wolf, for joining me in the Library. Your love and joy for fandom have left me feeling quite tender-hearted, in the best way. It's so so good to ask the question "Is there anyone out there who is just like me?" and find over and over that the answer chorusing back is "yes." Thank you for adding your yes to our chorus, and joining me for Pride in the Library.

If you want more @wolfpants be sure to check out their work on AO3! I can't help but recommend the fic that made me fall in love with her writing in the first place, Pages of You, which I've featured previously for Happy Hour. It's got Drarry and Wolfstar, and is one of my favorite comfort rereads.

🏳️‍🌈 Lots of Love and Happy Pride! 🏳️‍🌈

[icannotgetoverbirds]

YOU ARE NOT IMMUNE TO MANIPULATION

You are not immune to manipulation, and the sooner you accept that, the better! Believing that you are immune to manipulation makes you easier to manipulate because you don't see it coming and there's now shame attached to admitting that possibility!

People who get manipulated are not stupid or foolish - they are victims! I cannot stress this enough! If you have been manipulated, it does not mean you are or were stupid, it means that you are HUMAN. We are social creatures, wired in such a way that our wants and needs can be (and often are!) turned against us!

And even if only "stupid" people were getting manipulated? They still wouldn't deserve it! The idea that they would reeks of ableism! Plus, if you take a label and say that anyone it's attached to deserves bad things, it'll only be a matter of time before the people in power slap that label on you! Yes, you!

It's the same reason why we need to not be calling for pedophiles to be murdered - because now conservatives are labeling queer people as groomers, knowing that it'll pull that emotional hair-trigger just about everybody across all political spectrums has developed!

That aside. Terfs will play nice. Cults will play nice. MLMs will play nice. People trying to take advantage of you will play nice. And you may think you'll always be able to see through it. Maybe you really are pretty good at spotting it, and that's great! But you are not immune, and your experience is not universal.

You want to know who these kinds of people prey on? The most vulnerable of us. The outcasts, the poor, the uneducated, the desperate, the isolated, the people with nowhere left to run and nobody left to turn to. So maybe get off your high horse about how you'd never fall for such an obvious trap and lend a helping hand to those that need it the most. Because if you don't, they will - and the debt that vulnerable people will incur from that 'help' will haunt them.

You wanna know how I know this?

I was born and raised in a cult.

I didn't break free because I was smart or special or a better person than anyone else in the cult - I broke free because the cult has been weakening, and the timing of their loosening grip lined up with the pandemic, my values, my wants, and believe it or not, my fucking autism, and I got lucky. Very, very lucky.

I wasn't stupid, either. I didn't fall for the cult, I was manipulated into it as a child because of undue influence. I had no other choice. I was a vulnerable person. Had I had support and space to question things, had I been better educated on manipulation tactics, had I not been dependent on my parents for literally everything, I might've escaped sooner. I might've gotten to experience childhood and adolescence as a boy, as myself.

Do you understand what I'm saying? We have got to stick together. We have got to stick together. We have got to stick together. Either we stick together, and fight together, and protect each other - especially the vulnerable people - or the people who want to use us will divide and conquer.

Those people will get their barbed hooks into our community and it's going to be painful and difficult to get them out. They will target our family, every marginalized and downtrodden person, and when they're gone, we won't have enough left to fight anymore. Do you understand? Do you get it? That's how they get us. That's how it's happened before, and it's happening again.

Please. Please listen to this. I am begging you, do not leave the vulnerable behind. Do not leave them behind. Do not leave us behind. Don't let them divide us.

Please.

[argumate]

can't imagine why people would spend a lot of time playing online games during *checks* the third fucking year of a pandemic

the belief that "kids only resort to online games [or any other hobby unrelated to schoolwork] when they are psychologically hollow" is going to be taken as a slur but you can make it more accurate by changing it to "when they feel no sense of intrinsic reward or satisfaction from doing schoolwork", which is a much more understandable situation and suggests possible methods of fixing it, at least for some kids.

now I think it's inevitable that not every child is going to get their kicks from study -- I mean I certainly didn't, I just got lucky that wasting all my time on software ended up being compatible with society's demands in the era in which I was lucky enough to be born -- and we certainly don't want to create the false impression that schoolwork is the only way to contribute to society given that's so far from the truth, schoolwork is just a very specific game you can play after all!

(there's also the issue in a Chinese context that the young people are already over-educated relative to the available jobs, and tackling that problem by having them do post-graduate studies while the factories desperately look for workers really isn't a solution at all).

now of course online games are a potent vector for compulsive behaviour that can be monetised, which is rather more alarming, but instead of just cracking down on the obviously scummy tactics out there it's always helpful to offer more compelling alternatives instead; most people want to live interesting and meaningful lives and if they can't find that outside of video games then that's more of a criticism of what's on offer than it is of them.

[radishhqueen]

i know I've talked about it a few times on the internet in passing, but i have an eating disorder called ARFID (Avoidant Restrictive Food Intake Disorder). kinda does what it says on the tin. every ARFID-haver has a different experience, with different bad foods and safe foods, and for different reasons, but it mostly boils down to avoiding eating for reasons related to 1) bad textures 2) fear of vomiting/getting sick and/or 3) just a general lack of interest.

buzzfeed just published an article yesterday detailing a bit more about ARFID and some quotes from some individuals who have it. since it wasn't added to the DSM until 2013, it's still not widely known about. i didn't have a name for the thing that framed my whole relationship with food until 2020! it would mean a lot to me if people could take the time to read the article and maybe share it around. :)

a little bit about my experiences with ARFID below the cut:

tl;dr: the more people are aware of ARFID, the more likely people are to get helped. more info on the r/ARFID subreddit. if this sounds like you, you're not the only one going through this!

I'm very lucky in the sense that I've gotten a lot better at eating since i was a kid. most of my problems with food are related to texture, and my bad textures pretty much rule out all meats, fish, poultry, and a lot of mushy things, like mashed potatoes and cooked onions. these textures make up a lot of my region's cultural foods, so growing up i had a solid 10-15 foods that i could reliably eat, and i started showing signs of ARFID as soon as my parents started giving me solid foods.

i was accused as a kid of being a picky eater, and was told I'd grow out of it. the thing is: i desperately wanted to be able to eat normally! i wanted to be able to eat whatever my family cooked, or go over to a friend's house without being scared of what was for dinner! but if i tried to eat anything with a "bad texture", I'd end up gagging and eventually throwing up. this is not pleasant for anyone involved. this quickly turned into an aversion to trying new things, as i was scared of gagging and the annoyance of the people around me.

throughout all of this, i never met anyone who had similar issues to me. adults in my life would compare it to how they didn't like XYZ food as a child, but eventually got over it. i kept waiting for the magic switch in my brain to flip over, and it didn't. i had a lot of mental health issues as a kid unrelated to food, but the shame and loneliness i felt around eating certainly did not help.

the magic switch in my brain never flipped. it still hasn't. what did change was I moved out and suddenly had complete control over my own diet. for the first time, i didn't have to force myself to try to eat food without throwing up. my friends in college didn't even know about my extensive issues with food until i told them. but once I had that judgment free space, i was able to push at those boundaries that had been encroaching, and become more and more comfortable with a wider variety of foods.

nowadays, i don't worry about going to restaurants or eating at other people's houses. i still don't eat meat, poultry, or fish. I still can't eat a lot of mushy foods. what changed was suddenly having the space to accept my eating for what it was, and be okay with failing to eat new things. increased anxiety due to the pandemic and y'know. the world. has definitely made food a lot more difficult for me again, but this time i have the support of a community behind me, and it makes a world of difference.

i have to emphasize, throughout all of this i was incredibly lonely. i didn't have the words to describe what i was going through. food has a huge cultural importance, and it was something that i felt disconnected from. i can't blame my parents, because they thought they were doing the right thing, and there was absolutely no guidance on this sort of thing. again: ARFID wasn't added to the DSM until 2013. it is still not widely known about. i have never had a doctor that has already known about ARFID, and i have bounced between a lot of doctors.

if any of this resonates with you, there's an active community on the r/ARFID subreddit. i personally am a member of the associated discord server, and it's been a really great experience to meet a bunch of people who are also dealing with the issues I'd faced alone for my entire life. you're not alone 💕

[crystalelemental]

“books-are-my-life-stuff: Even if Variety Scout can be considered as a testing ground to see if character is popular enough, it still feels pointless to pull when DeNA puts little effort at it. I agree that it's a lame and blatant cash grab, to showcase that DeNA might be getting a little greedy and desperate, especially with so many sync pairs thrown around AND Master Fair rerun every month.“

I think the problem is that they likely flatlined.  The problem with a gacha model is that you need incentive to pull for every new tool, and Gauntlet, while mildly successful, didn’t hook too many people.  The new Limited CS is another attempt, but I imagine it’s still not successful because they’re trying to make the game accessible.  My understanding is it almost failed early on due to poor practice as a game, and they’re likely wary of stepping out of line all at once.  But it won’t surprise me if we inevitably encounter a mode that is pure pay to win, because gacha almost has to have that.  Variety scouts are likely another attempt to monetize in some direction by putting low-cost options in for fans of these less popular characters, but it’s not sticking.  I don’t really know what the solution is.  It should be “Your profits have gone up, be satisfied with the customer base you have and continue to treat them well,” but this is a company we’re talking about.

“Zinfogel did say on his stream that he's busy working, so he didn't have much time to upload nowadays, but if he is burning out of the game, I can't blame him. Same goes for Skippingmud, who now only posted whenever they can. The game feels stale nowadays. I might be burning out of the game too, I felt that sign since last two (or three?) gauntlet when I didn't feel like racking up win streaks, but it only hit me when Alola VA happened and I was disappointed at it.”

Yeah, it shows up sometimes.  I dunno.  I think the engagement can wax and wane, and I think it’s important to follow the waning periods and take a step back, rather than double down.  Speaking of which...

“I was surprised when you pulled for the Tapus even though you had said you didn't like them, so that was what you meant by giving in to your impulses.”

>_>

It’s a lesser form of the situation I had in FEH.  Here, it is more of a “I got really lucky, and love field effects,” but I was fully prepared to drop Lana if things didn’t go well, and only wanted a copy of Hau and Mina.  The game decided to toss me duplicates in the same multi.  Mina was on the chopping block if Hau didn’t go well.  The real failure on my impulses was Agatha, who I had no real business pulling for, but did because “Hey, things have gone really well and I want to.”  But for a boring month, you’re right, this should have been my time to save.  I didn’t, because I wanted to have what I considered fun tools, and have walked away with Hau and Mina feeling really disappointing.  So it’s...not my best work.  It’s definitely been worse, FEH built up a terrible level of impulse in me during the pandemic, but it’s a feeling that’s gotten better with time, and I consider this more of a relapse than a full breakdown.  Good luck should be a sign to conserve, not pull for other things, and I did not heed that.  Now gem prices are going up and Master Fairs are going to happen next month.  Sure hope nothing bad happens!

[spencersmagic]

Tattoos - Spencer Reid

masterlist // join my taglist // The Fool: Symbol of New Beginnings

summary: as the first part of “the fool: symbol of new beginnings”, it starts off a series that depicts spencer’s increasing interest in those things he has been rejecting for so long. finding a safe space within his girlfriend, he allows himself to grow and expand his comfort zone.

couple: sub!spencer reid x fem reader

category: smut and fluff heheh :)

warnings: slight mentions of blood (just the word), tattoos, oral sex (male and female receiving), pain as a form of pleasure, the word "pandemic" is used, use of "mommy" 😈

Word Count: 3.3k

***

There is nobody more interesting than Spencer Reid.

Though the world is filled with cute nerds, there is nobody in the world that will ever intrigue her more than the pretty boy laying on top of her, kissing her neck and rutting against her thighs desperately. His lips engulfed her skin by bites, licking and sucking on the soft skin. The silky pajamas she was wearing felt so soft against her skin but did not provide as much friction as Spencer would’ve wanted, but he didn’t want to get carried away either. He didn’t want to give away so much of him this soon.

The few months they had been together, Spencer had tried incessantly to hide the… needier side of him, and Y/N had been trying, and failing, to make him open up.

Except for when they’re getting intimate.

Granted, they hadn’t really gotten truly intimate yet. Attempting to respect each other’s limits a little bit too much, to the point where they hadn’t even mentioned the idea of getting intimate.

His fingers reached down to grab the hem of her shirt, slowly, for the first time. She bit her lip while nodding, and that was all of the confirmation he needed to pull it up. As he revealed her skin to him for the first time, he saw the many ink drawings and intricate details that decorated her torso.

She had been worrying about what Spencer would think about her tattoos. The baby of the BAU, the prodigy of the FBI, the good boy could have some issues with tattoos. Perhaps he would go on and on about how people with tattoos, statistically, had more self-destructive behaviour, or are more prone to committing crimes. But her worries dissipated as he let out an involuntary whine at the drawings, rutting against her legs faster.

Interesting.

His lips were drawn directly to the drawings, though not kissing them directly.

“Are uh…” he coughed, failing to cover the neediness in his voice, “are they healed? Can I touch them?” his honey-dripped eyes met with hers, and he was locked. He couldn’t look away.

She giggled, eyes trailing his own. “Of course, Spence” her hand reached out to grab his hair, pulling him down to steal one more kiss from him before letting him discover her body. His fingers reached up to touch the tattoos hesitantly, feeling the slight bump in the skin on the more recent designs.

His fingers trailed around her skin ever-so-softly, and it made her body long for him even more. The softness, the care with which he touched her, almost spiritually, made goosebumps rise on her skin. Her body arched when his fingers reached up to trace her chest, circling around her nipple. He shuddered, overstimulated, lowering his lips slowly to meet her soft skin.

“Y-You’re so beautiful, Y/N” he whispered, kissing down her navel to her lower stomach, triggering butterflies to flutter to her chest. She looked down at him, lovingly. How did I get so lucky to get him, she thought.

He pulled down her panties slowly, his hooded eyes looking up for approval at Y/N. Her hair was sprayed around her face, framing it perfectly as she nodded. She looked like art.

He loved the small, delicate designs on her skin. But what got him at the edge of cumming in his pants is the thought of the pain. It made him intrigued. I made him want to know why she had so many of them - if there was something more to it.

“Oh!” she exclaimed, arching her back at the sudden cold as Spencer lapped her pussy experimentally, trying to figure out what feels best for her.

“Is that good?” he mumbled against her core as she squirmed at his touch. “Mhm” she mumbled softly before reaching up to bite her arm, trying to muffle her moans.

His tongue circled her clit, his lips engulfing it as he sucked and licked it simultaneously. He saw the way her mouth formed an ‘O’ before biting her own hand again. His hand reached up to her arm, pulling it away from her mouth. His eyes locked onto hers as she looked down questioningly.

“I wanna hear you, love” he said earnestly, before diving in again. His fingers reached up to help him get her to feel more, sinking his middle finger into it experimentally, curling it up trying to find her g-spot.

Her toes curled, thighs snapping around his head and fingers reaching to curl around her hair. She pulled his hair, making him moan against her core, in return making her arch her back, cumming suddenly at the overwhelming amount of feelings.

His arm splayed across her hips trying to keep her still as he eagerly licked every last drop of her release. Her body shook under his arm as she rode out her high, grinding her pussy against his mouth.

His lips trailed up her stomach and chest until they reached her cheeks, planting a kiss on each over, then her nose and, lastly, her lips, relishing her blissful giggles.

***

How did I ever manage to get such a beautiful woman?

The silk sheets glistened under the morning light, which highlighted her skin as he looked at her. His honey-glazed eyes, slightly tired from the time he had been concentrated on the beautiful designs, but he couldn’t stop looking at them. Even with an eidetic memory, he never wanted to forget the ink that was embedded in her skin forever. His lips skimmed over her skin ever-so-softly, as to not wake her.

Though tattoos are usually seen as an aggressive expression of art, they felt like caresses on her skin, marking it as she was touched by all which inspires her.

For an instance, jealousy filled his chest and limbs at the thought of them being able to fulfill Spencer’s dream – to be etched onto her skin forever, not a second passing in which they weren’t together. Being ink would be a small price to pay to spend eternity next to her.

The combing of her fingers through his hair startled him out of his daydream. She tilted his head up by his hair, making him look at her through his eyelashes. Her face was filled with bliss, humming at the beautiful sight.

“Did you sleep well, baby?” his voice was raspy and his eyes were hooded. She looked so beautiful. He was certain he would never have enough of her. She grinned.

“I did… How long have you been awake?” she asked, watching his cheeks turns a crimson red, spluttering half-words.

“I- uh.. No-Not long, maybe… 30 minutes?” he finished, looking up at her. If she didn’t know any better she would think that he was searching for her approval.

She hummed, stroking his cheek softly, watching him pulling his lower lip between his teeth, doe eyes trailed on her every move. She propped herself up, holding herself up by her elbows to get a better look on the pretty boy skimming his breath over her stomach.

“You like my tattoos… Isn’t that right, baby?” she said, almost mockingly, watching him nod eagerly.

“Mhmm! Yeah, they’re very pretty” he trailed off, eyes trailing to look at her bare chest. “Eyes on me” she reprimanded him, watching as he didn’t budge, instead his lips twitching into a repressed smile. She let out a chuckle.

“You know what I mean!” he laughed with her, eyes meeting hers finally. “I did some of these myself…” she continued. “Of course, those on my arms were made by professionals, but when I was younger I learned back home how to make them. That way I could make a little bit of money while still getting my degree. I usually go to a place in the city because it’s so much easier to have someone else taking care of these, but making them myself can be fun” she finished, smiling, watching him look up at her mesmerizingly.

What a pretty boy, she thought.

She saw just how consumed he was at the thought of her getting tattoos, and all she wanted to do was indulge him – to fuel his interest, his hunger, and any other feelings that might arise.

Y/N decided to throw Spencer the bait, hoping he would take it.

“I want to get one done on my ankle. Would you like to come over and watch the process?” she didn’t even finish her sentence when he started nodding eagerly.

This is going to be fun.

***

His fingers shook with anticipation as he knocked steadily on the door. The wooden plank separated him from his girlfriend, and he could only feel the need to knock again, instead refraining from doing so. He swayed, waiting for not more than 15 seconds, but felt like an eternity. His hands held his duffle bag and a surgical mask tightly.

The door opened suddenly, making him look up at the girl. The sweatpants he had forgotten once early in their relationship hung on her hips, and the white tank top which, frankly, was the best option when tattooing for mobility reasons, but he couldn’t care less about that. The outline of her nipples against the thin fabric hindered him from having any coherent thoughts.

She laughs. “What’s that?” she points at the surgical mask. He looks down, chuckling nervously.

“I uh… I know that open wounds s-such as tattoos need to be sterilized and protected from infection and I wanted to make sure you would be safe” he finished, smiling up at her.

She turns, walking him into her apartment. The table where they usually place popcorn during their movie nights had been moved, surrounding it with three tall chairs, one of which was filled with materials.

“That isn’t really necessary, Spence. It’s not like were going through a pandemic, or something like in movies” she chuckles lightly. He’s always been so careful when it comes to her. “Plus, I know you wouldn’t’ve come if you were sick”.

“Actually, some studies show that we carry so much bacteria we could fill a large can of soup…” he explained, hands putting his mask inside his bag before placing it carefully on the floor. He took off his coat and scarf, “… in fact, about three to five pounds of bacteria could be collected from any adult”.

He walked over to Y/N, who was placing the stencil carefully over her ankle, wetting it slightly. He watched her fingers working as she pulled the paper carefully, examining the design. The purple paint depicted some sort of lizard. His eyes were googly and there was a banana peel on his head.

“Does it mean anything?” he whispered, getting close to her. She smiled at him before looking down at the design, realizing how much she liked it. The ink and the machine were all prepped, so she placed her ankle on a stable chair, bending over it to see if she had enough mobility. She grabbed a pair of white gloves from a box, putting them on dexterously.

“You are going to be my assistant today, okay? After sterilizing my gloves I can’t touch anything else than the sterilized skin and machine” her hands moved to grab the alcohol, rubbing it on her gloved fingers before pouring some on a cotton ball and cleaning over the design again.

“Of course! Anything you need” he rushed, standing next to her ready, eagerly, not unlike a puppy waiting to go play with their owner.

The machine whirrs as she starts tattooing the eye, following the lines of the design. It was sightly separated from the lizards’ face, but somehow it looked perfect.

“It’s a character from a children’s book…” she started, eyes trailing over the skin. Her eyebrows were knitted together and her bottom lip was pulled between her teeth, “… their name is Rumple Buttercup. The book is about uh…” she trails off, grabbing a tissue removing the extra ink and blood, “…this character, who is a lizard, right? But everybody around him is human. He feels so lost and lonely that he moved to a drain under the town to hide from them. He thought he would be rejected!” her voice carries so much emotion, so much excitement, “but then, he finds that the people he thought would reject him try to support him, getting him out of the sewers and into the world.”

She’s going over the mouth as she continues speaking. “I’ve been wanting to get him tattooed for a long time. I wish everybody would allow themselves to get out of the sewers and fully enjoy the world” she finished, looking up at Spencer. His eyes were glossy and he bit his lip, looking back at the tattoo.

Her fingers continued working on the design.

“So, do they all have meanings?” he questions, pointing at her arms, which held a few tattoos.

She nodded, “I mean, some do and some don’t. This one on my left arm, the Loki helmet, is cute. But I didn’t really have a connection to it.” She tucked her bottom lip between her teeth again.

“But it’s all safe, right?” he was now walking around her, looking at the tattoo from different angles, before looking at the materials. She chuckled lightly.

“Yea, Spence. It’s all safe. I take all precautions possible to ensure that nothing bad happens”, she lifts her hand, leaving the pen on the machine, “tissue” she demanded, watching Spencer stumbling to get it to her as soon as possible. She held back a smile, cleaning the tattoo one last time.

“Do you like it?”.

Spencer looked at the design wide-eyed, mouth agape. “Oh my! That’s so cute!” he exclaimed. “Did it hurt a lot?”

“Not really, Spence. It’s more of a pinch… Do you want one?” she laughed watching him look at her in disbelief.

“I can get one? It’s so cute! Wait, does it hurt too much? I mean, I know it doesn’t hurt you because you’re used to it, but will it hurt me? Is it totally safe? Not-Not that I don’t trust you, Y/N. I trust you with my life. Oh, can I get the same one as you?” he asked question after question as she covered her tattoo in film, before getting up, giggling.

“I’ll go get another set of supplies”.

**

It didn’t hurt as much as he thought it would. Frankly, he had been nervous until the moment when Y/N had placed the pen on the skin, starting by the eye like she had done with hers. He meant it when he said he trusted her with his life. His heart rushed.

It wasn’t from the nerves.

His eyes are trailed on her concentrated face. This time she isn’t speaking, too scared of making a mistake or hurting the pretty boy squirming under her. Her lips are spread slightly, mirroring his own, and all he wants to do is reach out to kiss her.

“Spencer, be a good boy and stay still. I don’t want to ruin your pretty skin”, she watched him nod eagerly before resuming her work.

Her tits were brushing ever-so slightly against his leg, and he would’t’ve even noticed if it weren’t for the adrenaline that was rushing to his brain at the pain, which was somehow being registered as pleasure. His legs tensed slightly, and his eyes shut at the feeling. Her fingers were brushing against his ankle, her soft skin raising goosebumps wherever she touched.

His pants felt uncomfortably tight as he became incredibly hard. The dexterity with which she worked was similar to that which she always had when she brushed her finger down a page, skimming for information – which she had when her fingers grasped his cock, milking him so efficiently he could feel it right now. He heard the machine, which stopped whirring, but he couldn’t open his eyes to look at her without cumming in his pants.

“Oh, my love… You’ve worked yourself up to quite a state, huh?” she stood slightly, wanting to brush her fingers against his bottom lip. Instead, she brushed her own against his, teasingly.

“Mhmm” he whimpered, opening his eyes to look at her every move.

“Words, baby. You know this” she reprimanded him, looking into his honey-glazed ones.

“Y-Yes Mommy, I have” he whimpered pathetically, and she wantd to leave the tattoo like that, but she knew better.

She also wanted to see how good he could be for her.

“After covering and cleaning up your tattoo, we’ll do something about your little problem. How does that sound?” she watched him falling apart slowly, desperate to release. But he knew better.

He gulped. “Okay” he peeped. As Y/N cleaned him up, he knew that she was taking longer than usual. She was testing him – trying to get him to crack.

If there’s something Spencer had always succeeded at, thought, was tests.

Through whimpers over the sensitive skin, and tight eyes trying to control what he looked at instead of trailing his eyes on her tits, he managed to survive her test, leaving him panting, lips red and knuckes white.

“Take off your pants and spread your legs like a good boy” she demanded, “and be careful. You can’t do any strenuous activity for a week after getting the tattoo” she watched as he rushed out of his pants, his cock standing tall, flush against his lower stomach.

His jaw dropped when he saw that she stood up to clean up their surroundings. “This is expensive equipment, Spencer. I can’t have it lying around” she explained innocently, suppressing a smile at his face. His eyes were wide, pout prominent and knuckles turning white. Small, cute pants were being expelled through his warm lips.

Her legs were weak at the sight of Spencer getting so worked up over nothing. He was so responsive, and she couldn’t wait to play with him.

She stood in front of him, hands on her hips as she stared him down.

“I worked very hard on your tattoo, baby…” her now-bare thumb reaching up to brush over his bottom lip, feeling his breath on her hand. She pulled her thumb into his mouth, watching him suck on it. “…wouldn’t want your pretty ink to get ruined, would we?” she watched as he shook his head.

“Use your words, baby” she said, not bothering to remove her thumb from his mouth. She watched him squirm for a minute.

“I’ll be good, mommy. I promise��� his eyes were hooded as he humiliatingly mumbled around her thumb.

She was satisfied.

Removing her thumb, she got on her knees in front of him, holding his cock. It was pressed flush against his stomach, the tip red and sensitive as she blew on it, making him whimper loudly. Soft outlines of veins decorated the sides. Her mouth watered.

She licked a stripe up the underside of his cock, relishing the way his thighs clenched tightly and he threw his head back, letting out little “ah ah ah”s when she started sucking on his head deeply, licking off the precum she was milking out of him. It wouldn’t take him too long to cum.

His fingers reached to grab her hair, shakily pushing it out of her face.

“Y-You’re so beautiful, Y/N” he whispered between whines, groaning as she responded by taking him in completely, the tip of his head hitting her throat repeatedly. She hummed in approval at his words, her own stomach clenching. She sped up, needing to watch him release. His small whimpers and her gags were the only thing that could be heard in the room, and still it was so overwhelming to Spencer. He came in her mouth, squirming and thrashing around as she milked his release, overstimulating him with her warm mouth.

She popped his cock out of her mouth, swallowing his release. She watched the pretty boy trying to catch his breath, looking down at her blissfully.

“So… you liked the pain?

**

did you like it? did you like that?

taglist: @lady-anon-x @inlovewithbabygirl @username2002 @eoupe @galaxydefenderjulia @spencerreid-mgg @spenxerslut @onyourfingertips @big-galaxy-chaos @coldlilheart @fiftyshadesofspencerreid @averydiana @exhaleli @crushingonfreddie @user8298

[fic-chi]

100 Prompts in (late) celebration of hitting 200 followers

This was truly a rough year for us, eh? Some of us who made it through the pandemic, the shitstorm that is the American govt, and all around bullshittery destiny through at us have made it through, and, boy, an I so proud of you all! I've been having a hard time myself. 100 prompts aren't as easy as I anticipated, but here it is! As always, if you like my prompts or use them, please tag me! I'd love to see your interpretation!

1. "Nothing short of hellfire could possibly keep me from coming home."

2. "The skies weep when you tell me goodbye."

3. "There's a real possibility, right now, that mom let in a racoon the house thinking it was Bubby."

4. "Mad at you? I thought you were mad at me."

5. "No one, not even you who were so cruel to others, deserved to be punished in this way."

6. "I don't remember my past lives, but I guess it's innate to find you every time."

7. "Sometimes, we have to sacrifice things in order to keep the ones we hold dear safe. Sometimes, the thing we must sacrifice is ourselves."

8. "I-I didn't know you'd be home, but I got you an "I'm sorry for embarrassing you at the dinner" cake."

9. "Honey! The kids took another stray home!"

10. "Humans are vile creatures, yes, and ridding the Earth of them all could solve so many problems. But, to rid the world of human violence, it will also rid the world of human kindness."

11. Sleepy are the hearts that await a love most deserved.

12. "You do some bad things, but that doesn't mean you're a bad kid."

13. "This is nothing but a small price to pay for the privilege of cherishing you."

14. From their fingers, they casted one last desperate spell, hoping it would hit before darkness claimed them forever.

15. She sat in the dark, allowing the cold embrace of shadow lull her to bed.

16. He clung to what he could, his fingertips tearing away from the bones leaving streaks of sticky blood on the concrete walls.

17. "The world does suck, but I'll be damned if I'm going through it alone."

18. "Don't think too hard on that. He's one of those high intelligence, low wisdom guys."

19. "Every wish you made with your heart was heard. I promise."

20. "They say when you're drunk, you forget, but I seem to miss you more."

21. "It must be magic or something because I can't think of a reason why you're still here with me."

22. Soft candle light danced in the shine of her eyes like how the stars danced in the sky.

23. Everything she touched became so beautiful.

24. Forests of sunflowers, radiant as can be, were the domain of sprites and me.

25. From her bag, she pulled out a golden feather quill to make her final wish.

26. A trio of siblings, a band of brethren, to be forever connected both on this plane and whatever plane awaits them.

27. "Y'know, sweetie, everyone deserves to be loved even when you, yourself, believe you don't deserve it."

28. The bed already felt empty before he left.

29. "After all you've done to me, I must be drunk to still love you, but I haven't touched a drink since you left."

30. She was like a painting come to life with such perfection in her imperfections.

31. She held his face in her hands, lightly rubbing his cheeks, knowing that tomorrow will only bring heartbreak.

32. "I cry for you, feel for you, but who will do that for me?"

33. "Can't you take me home one last time?"

34. With his life fading ever more, he sweetly uttered their name as his body crumbled to nothingness.

35. "Dear diary, I'm back on my bullshit, and I'm not sorry."

36. As much as the loneliness ate away at her heart, she couldn't risk letting anyone in her heart to destroy what little she had left.

37. "Perhaps, you never needed to get piss drunk to forget someone. Lucky you..."

38. "I-I'm really trying here, but you're making me feel like my efforts are unappreciated."

39. The same nightmare plagued them these past several months when  things from the nightmare begin to manifest in real life.

40. After the loss of their creator and purpose of existence, an Android is met with a dilemma in the form of a lost baby.

41. "You have to get this right because you can't go marrying an orc and braid like you don't have thumbs."

42. "I know this is awkward because I never meant to release the great devil of the 7th Circle of Hell nor have intentions of making a deal, but I did make too much pasta again."

43. "My Hell ain't fire and white hot coals. My Hell is a big beautiful home with an equally big yard with no one, no family or friends, to share it with."

44. "Dying ain't too scary, but, I'll tell you what, if dying means I'll be alone on the other side, you can consider me terrified."

45. "Either my parents were cursed with over sensitive children, or I was cursed being born into a cruel family, and I don't know which is worse."

46. "Let me return to a time when everything was still perfect."

47. "Take this heart from me! The weight of a human heart is too much for me to bear."

48. "So many words bubble up in my throat when I see you, but all I want to tell you is you're beautiful."

49. "I can't even remember what I was worried about when the sight of you melted away all my anxiety."

50. "From just the simple touch of our fingertips, I already felt the sparks, baby."

51. Her eyes, just the right shade of amber, caught mine, and time slowed and only we existed.

52. "I could never let you go. Not even the strongest of winds or hottest of fires could get me to."

53. "I, uh jeez, I really wanted to say something, but I got all caught up in your radiance."

54. Curse my weak heart! Tomorrow, I will confess my feelings to him or forget it all!

55. "Theft! There's been a theft! My heart's been taken!"

56. "Pfft, you're not as scary as you make yourself out to be, ya know."

57. "You're either hungry or angry so have some pancakes first, jerk!"

58. "You didn't have to pack your whole house for a day trip!"

59. "You're a real piece of work, ya know, but you're hot so I guess I can let it go."

60. "I gotta thank sober me later for setting out the hangover kit."

61. "It's not hard to read you when you wear your heart on your sleeve."

62. "Gosh, my hands are just so cold! If only I had mittens, or gloves, or even the warmth of another pair of hands."

63. They felt like their mind was slowly losing itself the more they stayed in the same room as that person.

64. "Hey, give me some of your burdens to shoulder, too. You don't have to be afraid of me leaving you because of them."

65. The loving dreams have ceased, and my heart is missing its piece.

66. "I can be his mama AND his papa because, as long as that child needs a loving adult in his life, I'm not going anywhere."

67. In my dreams, I only see you, but my eyes open, upon the shiny light of day, and are pleasantly surprised to find my dream sleeping peacefully next to me.

68. "I'm afraid if I don't tell you now, you'll have lived your entire life not knowing how you had my heart and will always have it."

69. "Nice."

70. The world stopped and held it's breath as we danced under the moon, and your eyes captured the light of all the stars.

71. "Oh, spare me the lecture. I know you wish I was more like my brothers and sisters, and I'm sorry my existence itself is a pain, but you could at least pretend to love me."

72. "Oh, child, it doesn't matter that you were born of me or not because I can't imagine how to love you any more without suffocating you!"

73. "Sweetie, no matter what happens between us, you'll never be a mistake to me because there's no way I could ever stop loving you."

74. "Ain't nothing wrong with crying and snotting and drooling all over the place, sweetheart. Gotta let all that shit out so your heart don't have to carry all that hurt."

75. "I don't want you getting lost in the crowd so I guess you can hold my hand or whatever."

76. "I didn't buy extra food for you! I just happen to redeem my points on the night you were coming over... that's all."

77. "God save us all. I think your brother went to fix the fridge again."

78. No one could have survived that, yet he fervently rubbed his dear friend's hands and face, hoping that the pinkish blush color would return.

79. "Daffodils, honey, pine, and nectar, but the sweetest of them all is something that cannot be replicated, duplicated, or copied: you."

80. "I'm most afraid that, in my mind, you will be nothing more than a distant, flittering memory."

81. "Promise me! You must promise me that, in another life or another time, you'll find me again."

82. And then I was given a choice: love or reason.

83. "Why am I still a monster if she loved me?"

84. "My heart doesn't flutter for you anymore."

85. "Stay by my side... please."

86. The rumble of the bus lulled them to sleep, their hairs tickling my neck as they slowly drifted to my shoulder and to the land of dreams.

87. "You don't understand! There is- no, there must be something wrong with me, fundamentally... otherwise I'm, I'm just a terrible person for no reason."

88. "I want you to make me just another lovely memory for you to look back on. Can you do that for me, love?"

89. "The taste of your lips left me breathless."

90. "What good are my eyes if not to soak in the magnificence that is you?"

91. "Countless times I've poured my heart onto paper, proclaiming the absolute passion in my heart for you, but it always ends with me waking up."

92. "It breaks my heart to see that I haven't got yours while, at first sight, you've stolen mine."

93. "You are a beautiful candle flame for your warmth and comfort is something I can never grasp."

94. "I, normally, am eloquent, well spoken, among many other things, but, around you, I've become speechless."

95. "An anchor to the ship in my mind, you've become more than a friend in my eyes."

96. "Days, or months, or years have passed. I cannot tell you which for even a minute without you is eternity."

97. "I feel like I'm floating with you."

98. "You may not deserve someone to love, but am I not deserving to love you?"

99. "Even when you think you've hit rock bottom, and everyone's left you, I'll always be there."

100. "It was tough, huh? I'm so proud you got through the thick of it."

[mostlysignssomeportents]

The once and future mass-resignation and what it means for working people

Once upon a time, a terrible disease swept the lands, prompting a great wave of resignations as low-waged workers walked off the job, rejecting offers of pay raises that would have been unthinkably lavish just a few years earlier. Their bosses went nuts.

The former employers of these workers slammed them as lazy and greedy, and called upon their fellow bougies to take up “unskilled” labor and scab those proles back into the workplace. When that didn’t work, they passed laws that banned desperate bosses from bidding up wages. That didn’t work either, so new crimes were put on the books that made it easier to slam unemployed people in notoriously cruel prisons. That failed, too, prompting cuts to the already grossly inadequate welfare system, trying to starve workers back into their jobs.

That also failed. In the end, the situation led to a mass redistribution of wealth and a period of unheralded pluralism and opportunity for workers whose families had been stuck in low-waged, dead-end work for generations.

This isn’t a covid story. It’s the story of the post-Black Death labor markets in England, where desperate noblemen passed the country’s first labor law, the 1349 Ordinance of Labourers. Chroniclers of the day urged “knights and churchmen” to get into the fields and shame their social inferiors back into harness.

https://sourcebooks.fordham.edu/seth/ordinance-labourers.asp

This threat didn’t get the peasants back into the fields, so the law threatened out-of-work people with prison, capped wages at pre-Black Death levels, and banned begging at funerals (“practically the only form of social welfare available”).

The failure to force workers back into the fields left landholders unable to profit from their lands, prompting sell-offs that created the middle class. Real incomes doubled. This is a pattern that follows every pandemic, according to an NBER paper that found that after every pandemic, wages shoot up and the return on capital tanks:

https://www.nber.org/system/files/working_papers/w26934/w26934.pdf

I learned about all this from David Dayen’s brilliant longread for The American Prospect, “The Great Escape,” featuring the voices of workers who have — or are thinking of — walking off the job.

https://prospect.org/labor/great-escape-why-workers-quitting-pandemic-trauma/

As Dayen points out, the great resignation includes workers in all kinds of jobs, not just low-waged ones, but resignations are concentrated at the bottom of the wage-scale. It’s not hard to see why: Dayen recounts the stories of workers in national chains that were bought out by private equity looters whose much-vaunted “efficiencies” boil down to slashing wages and imposing cruel and dangerous conditions on workers.

There’s Caroline Potts of Murfreesboro, TN, who loves dogs and was excited to get at job as a groomer at Petsmart. It seemed like a dream-job, but Potts learned she was expected to meet impossible quotas, working at a rate made the experience traumatic for dogs. She also learned that Petsmart management was only paying lip-service to its policy of excluding dogs with seizure disorders or problems with stressful environments. She worried that she was going to preside over the death of one of these dogs. To make things worse, her customers were routinely abusive to her and her employer did nothing to shield her from their bad conduct.

Potts was locked into a two-year noncompete contract and was only able to quit for a rival company by begging her manager to release her from it. Needless to say, many workers in noncompetes won’t be so lucky — and fast-food restaurants lead the nation in the use of noncompete agreements.

Zella Roberts worked in fast food — she was a Sonic carhop in Asheville, NC. When Sonic got scooped up by Roark Capital, the new owners switched to exclusive app- and credit-card-based ordering, with no facility to tip employees. But Roberts was being paid $5/hr, a “tipped minimum wage” premised on the worker being able to make up the difference from tips. It’s illegal to pay tipped minimum wage to workers who can’t collect tips, but that didn’t stop Sonic.

It’s not just fast-food and pets. Ed Gadomski was a 32-year veteran of the IT department in CT’s Waterbury Hospital. When Leonard Green & Partners bought the hospital, they laid him off and then offered him his old job at $13.46/h, a third of his former wage, with no pension or health-care (at a hospital!).

Predictably, regular large-business abuses are sinking to the level of private equity. Reina Abrahamson of Salem, OR was a Wells Fargo customer rep working from home. She was put on minimum salary for six months while Wells processed a request to supply her with a 100 foot Ethernet cable that would reach from her home router to her computer (she supplemented her wages driving for Doordash).

Amazon is a leader in labor abuses. At Stephanie Haynes’s job at an Amazon warehouse in Joliet, IL, she was given tasks that were literally impossible to perform while maintaining six feet of social distance — like lifting a pallet with a co-worker. Haynes lost her fiance to covid and decided it wasn’t worth risking her own life to help Jeff Bezos grow his fortune, so she walked off the job from March to July 2020.

We know only a fraction of what goes on at Amazon warehouses, and that’s by design. Monica Moody was fired from her Amazon warehouse in Charlotte, NC for talking to the press about her labor conditions.

The “essential workers” of the pandemic died in droves — a study found that the highest covid mortality among working-aged people was among cooks, warehouse workers, construction workers, bakers, etc:

https://www.medrxiv.org/content/10.1101/2021.01.21.21250266v1.full.pdf

Dayen writes that as intolerable and dangerous as these workers’ jobs were during lockdown, they got worse afterward, when stir-crazy, traumatized, short-tempered customers showed up to scream at them and even assault them as they tried to enforce masking rules and vaccine requirements for entry.

No wonder workers are quitting. But they’re not just quitting — they’re also striking, with or without a union. America has experienced a vast, wildly under-reported wave of wildcat strikes. Take the Jack in the Box franchise in Sacramento where un-unionized workers struck twice. As Leticia Reyes — a worker who took part in both strikes — tells it, the first strike was prompted by management’s refusal to fix the AC during a 109' heat wave. “The first time, she wouldn’t listen to us, she ignored us. The second time, she told us it wasn’t high temperatures, it was us workers going through menopause.”

The workers got the AC fixed…and their manager got fired. And then the workers struck again, in protest of wage theft (they weren’t getting their mandatory paid breaks and overtime). The owner and his cronies crossed the picket line and tried to do the workers’ jobs…and couldn’t. After three days, management caved.

Says Reyes: “I am no longer scared to speak up. Big companies need us as workers and we should not be afraid to speak up.”

Practically the only place you’ll learn about stories like this one is in Payday Report (“Covering Labor in News Deserts”), a crowdfunded site that has chronicled 1,600 walkouts throughout the pandemic:

https://paydayreport.com/

Viral phenomena like #QuitMyJob and photos of handwritten “We all quit” signs hint at the true scale of the great resignation, and they inspire others to do the same. There’s good indications that employers are finally responding with better pay, benefits and conditions, but there’s no reason to think they’ve had a true change of heart. If the labor market changes, they’ll claw back those gains in a heartbeat.

But as with the 14th century post-plague labor markets, our workforce’s unwillingness to go back has proved remarkably sturdy. For example, red states that canceled covid relief early in a bid to starve workers back into dangerous, degrading, underpaid jobs are experiencing the same shortages of low-waged workers as blue states where benefits continued without interruption. Part of that might be due to a genuine worker shortage — 2m workers took early retirement during the pandemic, and a legacy of Trump’s ethnic cleansing policy has starved many sectors of precarious and desperate workers.

Cementing these gains over the long term will require institutional shifts: the threshold for a wildcat strike is very high, but labor action gets easier as labor gets organized. New unions are popping up across the country, and existing unions are finding unsuspected reserves of militancy. 1.3m Teamsters have new leaders who are committed to organizing grocery stores and Amazon warehouses:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/11/19/hoffa-jr-defeated/#teamsters-for-a-democratic-union

And striking nurses and Teamsters, and workers at factories from Kellogg’s to John Deere, are pushing to eliminate the disastrous “two-tier” contracts that destroy union solidarity, rendering unions toothless:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/11/25/strikesgiving/#shed-a-tier

Companies that seemed immune to unionization, from Amazon to Dollar General to Starbucks, are now fighting pitched battles against their workers using tactics that grow thinner and less credible by the day, as John Oliver documents with characteristic scathing hilarity:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gk8dUXRpoy8

Provisions in the Build Back Better bill don’t go as far as the PRO Act, but they will still add to the union movement’s tailwind.

But it’s workers, not law, who ultimately control the outcome. I’ll give the last word to Christine Johnson, a historian at Washington U in St Louis, whose work on the Ordinance of Labourers is cited by Dayen:

“If you don’t actually change the structures of power, and you don’t actually enact some changes in the labor and social hierarchies, it’s not going to produce lasting improvement in conditions of labor.”

[gildedmuse]

Law: A Life In Review

(With Annotations By A Snarky Bitch Who Spends Way Too Much Of Her Time Thinking About This Mess Of A Boy)

[Oh, okay. So Law bought this coat solely so he could go around pretending to be a bad-ass sneaky ninja. And he slapped a bright orange smile face on it because.... *Sigh* Well, because Law. What do you expect? The boy has his Swordsmen Drama he's got to keep up, and in Law's case, that means claiming and marking every piece of property, all his crewmates, and any sweater any ex-partner of his wasn't smart enough to take back before Law broke up with them.]

Chapter One, Part II: Who Knew Amber Lead Syndrome Was So Easy To Cure!

Law then searches his body for the Amber Lead and, after finding it on his liver, he removes his liver from his body.

..... Okay, so the poison was in his liver; makes sense. I mean, I don't know exactly how lead poisoning works but I would guess a build up in the blood and liver.

However, I am almost CERTAIN, that of curing the disease was as easy as, say, A FUCKING LIVER TRANSPLANT, then one of the dozen of fully trained, apparently highly skilled, ADULT SPECIALIST who worked at the hospital alongside his parents would have, I don't know, maybe given it a go? Like, they were desperate for any sort of solution, their children and neighbors and loved ones were dying and not a SINGLE FUCKING ONE thought, hey, maybe this toxin, whatever it is, is going through our liver.

"WTF? The syndrome is clearly infecting your brain, Doctor Williams. We all know that this is the result of exposure to amber lead, a substance that is actually highly toxic and has been sinking into our drinking water and built into the walls of our houses. This must be caused by a build up of whatever chemical in the Amber Lead is so toxic. Why would that have anything to do with the liver? Everyone knows the liver is where you store anger, hatred and other negative emotions."

"God, Williams, did you even go to med school!?"

[I know what you're thinking. "Wait, so you're surprised to learn it's basically just Lead Poison?" Only, you know, pictured: not the fuck how lead poison works.]

Using the medical knowledge taught to him by his parents, he removes the lead from his liver and puts it back in his body before falling asleep.

Law wakes up in a house, and sees that his skin has cleared up.

I'm pretty certain if you remove all the cancer cells from, say, your intestines, the ones that have formed on your gallbladder don't magically heal up.

Also, can't livers regrow? So if anything, if ALS is located in the liver, and cleansing the toxins from the liver relieves all other signs and symptoms, those people would be comparatively very lucky

You know if they hadn't been mass murdered already.

But like.... That's all Law does and it works!

The only difference is he doesn't have to like carefully slice parts of the liver away, or replace of with a piece of a heathy liver from someone else. He just yanks the poison straight on our of there! And literally THE NEXT MORNING all those white patches are gone.

Got to say, it almost makes it sound as though if only they found a liver donor and did a transplant on Lami, she would have been out of bed with a healthy complexion within two weeks.

Though I suppose everyone else in town's liver was too damaged to help. Not because of the Amber Lead, they all just seem like they were drunk as hell. Throwing parades in the middle of a city destroying pandemic? What is wrong with you people?

[Sorry, Law, we can't save your sister.... I mean, we COULD, but that would mean not doing those end of shift vodka shots every night so THAT ain't happening.]

I mean, unless the theory is that he needed to have just a basic cursory medical knowledge - toxins go through the liver! - and the actual heavy lifting was done by the ope ope no mi. Which, hey, I suppose it's nice knowing at least ONE of the characters in One Piece is an actual medically licenced doctor. Even if it is a piece of fruit.

[Fun Fact, this inanimate magical fruit has attended more university level medical lessons than Chopper, Marco, and Law combined.]

An old man named Wolf greets him, and Law is initially suspicious that Wolf will betray him to Doflamingo.

Paranoid much Law? Good. As you should be.

However, Wolf does not hold allegiance toward anyone and is very hospitable to Law, wanting to know how he got here in return for having rescued him from the cave.

Good to know at least someone (thing?) has one.

This is weirdly worded..... Like did he offer Law more clothes, food, water, shelter and then say, "but before I help pull you back from the very brink of death itself, you must pay back my hospitality by my answering my question."

Only even then, you can't just like, do a long transplant and magically fix someone. Like, the whole reason it gets more dangerous through the passing generations due to the fact that the toxin is building up more and more and so is causing more and more correlate health issues. You can't just remove the toxin and have everything be okay, because it is simply the catalyst causing all these related health issues.

Or was he like, "how did you end up in here? What happened? Wait, you're not from this island. Geez kid, what have you been through?" I kind of want it to be that one, both because it's more natural, bit also because it would say something about Law's mental state and perspective that after all those years with Doffy, he simply assumes that as the man is doing him a favour, he will want something in return. Even if really the man is just saying what most anyone would having found a kid in such terrible conditions.

Law reveals where he came from, although he declines to mention eating the Ope Ope no Mi.

At least something Corazon said actually got through. I'm surprised when Corazon mentioned how many people were searching for this fruit, and how he needed to be careful because if people knew he ate it they would come after him for his power, that Law didn't understand it to mean he should hide himself on the most remote corner of the world and kill himself so that the fruit would regrow in a place no one would find it. Finally, he has completed the mission Corazon set him!

Wolf offers to let Law stay with him until he has an objective in life, although he will have to work for him in return. Wolf reveals that he is an inventor, although none of his inventions work, and Law will have the risky task of testing how dangerous his inventions are.

Just.... How can two sentences be filled with so much fuckery?

Like, for starters, I'm assuming the summary left our the part where Wolf asked Law deep, probing questions about his purpose in life and where he could see himself in ten years. Still, that means the conversation was like:

Wolf: Damn kid, you look like death. I could help you, but in return, you have to tell me how you got here and in such bad state.

Law: Hmm, I'm suspicious of this offer, but I suppose I'm not in a position to bargain. Very well, I was with a man who was being chased by the feared pirate Donquixote Doflamingo. He finally caught up with us and murdered my da- my guardian, but before Doflamingo showed up da- the man had hidden me away and instructed me to escape to the next island and find the nearest town. I did so, but I wasn't about to approach them asking for help whole in such a weakened state, travelling alone, and having no knowledge of this place or the people who reside here. Instead I found this cave, and took shealter here as I needed a place both out of the elements and somewhere that I could hide from Doflamingo, as he more than likely has his minions scourging all the nearby islands in an attempt to take me captive.

Wolf: Wow, kid, that is quite the story, and a hell of an adventure for a boy so young to have all on his own. Really, having gone through that at such young age, I have to kind of wonder.... Do you even have a reason to live?

Law: .... Excuse me?

Wolf: I just mean that's a lot of stress for such young kid, and not once in that long tale you spin did you mention how you imagined your future would one day play out.

Law: The fuck, because I was telling you about a crazy, powerful, unprincipled piece of shit who is actively haunting me down! It's hardly the time to talk about potential colleges I should apply to!

Wolf: You haven't even picked out a college yet? Kid, I can't let you just leave when you clearly have no clear plan for what you want to do with your future. Your blood would be on my hands.

So then he offers Law a place to stay and probably at the same time they're both like, "but you can't stay for free/but you won't let me stay for free" so Wolf tells him that while he is perfectly fine giving Law shealter and food and all that until he can work out what his bed dream is, Law will have to earn his keep by acting as Wolf's assistant.

Wolf: And it won't be the kind of simple chores a rich non-artic circle brat like you must be use to! I happen to be an inventor.

Law: What kind of things do you invent?

Wolf: All kinds of useful things. A self steering mechanism that can navigate the grand line without a map or a log pose or even a single living soul on board, a bed that can convert into a safe room during emergencies like pirate raids or fires and even floats in the event of a flood, a shovel that can dig through anything with easy - a man can dig right through the toughest stone without breaking a sweat. And that was all just the last two weeks. My older stuff is even better. Practically found of this small, four person sized ship that sails on wind currents instead of waves. It can get you around the entire globe in under half the time than if you're navigating the ocean, and it can pass right over the calm belts and the red line without danger. I call it an aero-boat!

Law: That's-!!! I can only imagine how useful it must be, allowing people to travel faster, further, and safer! How is the air not filled with them!? Are you unable to find certain material!? Did the government force you to shut down production!? Why do you live out here in the middle of nowhere!? Surely, people must be bidding in the millions to-

Wolf: Alright so quick disclaimer: The self steer tends to end up stuck in a loop and insist there are islands where there aren't, the bed has a minor flaw where when it closes up, it can't be reopened and also there is no fresh air supply (I lost so many hamsters to that one....), The hammer can dig throw stone but if you push it through soft sand it shatters into millions of pieces, and the aero-boat has a minor flaw where the engine will drop out of the craft after about two minutes into flight..... If you're lucky. Mostly it will just burst into flames.

Law: ..... So..... None of those things actually work then?

Wolf: They work! Just not as well as they are meant to.

Law: .... So you're not an inventor at all. You're just a really bad builder who takes a lot of potentially useful parts and turns them into dangerous and unusable junk.

Wolf: No, no, I INVENTED them..I came up with the idea, at least! It's just the designs that gave failed.

Law: So are you crazy or just like the least competent person ever?

Wolf: But! You'll never get bored! Not with all the constant threats to your safety and your life, seeing as how most of my inventions do tend to turn out far more dangerous than I originally intended.

Law: Dude! My safety is under constant threat NOW! Did you not hear about the insane pirate who captains over an entire criminal organization and who gladly murdered his own brother in cold blood to try and find me!? I thought you wanted to help me!?

Wolf: I do! I want to help you follow your dream! Once you figure it out, that is. Assuming the automatic house cleaner doesn't kill you first. Yeah, yeah, or that insane pirate friend of yours. You think you're more than old enough to know we all have homicidal, ability using pirates trying to kill us. My inventions are far more unique. And dangerous.

Law: !!!!!

Wolf literally went from, "here kid, let me help you" to, "but in exchange you must assist me at my work inside my Death Cabin!"

And yet, it was still easily the best offer Laws ever got so...

(If Wolf had just offered for Law to stay free of charge or work, Law would have yeeted himself outta there thinking he was going to be taken advantage for. Risking his life for rent and food probably seemed pretty fair to him. -- Katrin)

Law has a happy life with Wolf, and on occasional hunting trips, the inventor shows skill with a rifle.

I mean, it says "Happy" but Law has just suffered six major traumas in less than five years while also witnessing untold acts of violence and deprivation. Also, it's Law, so it's hard for me to imagine he wasn't a LITTLE bitchy/sassy with this supposed inventor who couldn't invent a fucking pair of reading glasses without them maiming at least four test dummies. Then again, given all that has happened, maybe getting frustrated and upset at Wolf's utter incompetence helped keep Law's mind from becoming trapped in his own despair and fear. Maybe a happy Law is a Law who is bitching about how of COURSE the automatic locking door didn't work - why the hell would Garakuta-ya attach a fucking GUILLOTINE to it? Hey, find your bliss, kid, whatever that may be.

Law asks him how he became so skilled, but Wolf only says that he learned it sometime in the past.

Oh, mysterious past... Hey! Who wants to bet it involved a female character - likely in a caretaker role - who USE to be apart of Wolf's life but ISN'T now, due to Death By Male Character Advancement?

Haha, I'm kidding. We don't take bets on foregone conclusions.

Also, this guy made Law his assistant knowing how dangerous the work was, the on top of it, took one look at this kid dressed in black and animal prints who slinks into shadows and stands there silently glowering and thinks, yep, he'll make a great hunting buddy. Absolutely no way anything could possibly go wrong in this dark forest, me with a gun and Law somewhere behind me, probably.

(It's not as if baby!Law was giving off tiny serial killer vibes or anything without even trying and even when in the best of moods he could manage in that period of his life. It's not as if tiny!Law didn't learn to use a rifle thinking of Doffy's head on the other end of the gun mounted on each and every target, only occasionally swapping it out for Vergo's head, no of course not! -- Katrin)

Wolf goes to the market once a week to sell his inventions and vegetables [...]

His life endangering, failed inventions and his veggies, but not the meat from those hunting trips despite his prowess with a rifle. Those kills? Those aren't for food or money. That's just to silence his blood lust a few more days...

[...] and while left behind on one of these occasions Law goes on a walk. While in the forest, he spots two boys, Shachi and Penguin, beating up a polar bear named Bepo. After noticing Law, Shachi and Penguin confront him, but Law activates Room around them in response.

Law: I must keep the fact that I have the ope ope no mi a secret!

Also Law: ROOOOM!

He lifts two rocks into the air and uses Shambles to switch them with Shachi and Penguin, and they fall to the ground and get knocked out.

Law: *in the middle of a fight, upon seeing two heavy rocks that he could easily use as weapons* I have the perfect plan.

Also, how can this supposed operation room fruit come with a default "teleporting objects according to your will" ability but not, oh, some kind of anesthesia that would knock people out instantly? What kind of operation rooms did his parents even work in? Barnum's Amazing Three Ring Hospital?

(I feel like switching on the 'levitate and switch stuff' setting but not the 'anaesthesia' setting is less the op op no mi and more Law not being very inclined to peacefully put people into a sleep they can recover for while feeling high and relaxed. He's not that nice.)

(I mean, we know that canonically Law was like "fuck anaesthesia" when he operated on Luffy, so he clearly doesn't believe in it. -- Katrin)

Bepo thanks Law, saying that he hoped he could have become friends with the boys assaulting him. He reveals that he came from Zou in the New World [...]

As if Law wasn't immediately like, "we hat so you just approached them to make friends? What fucking sea do you come from cause it sure as hell isn't this one.

[...] and had left to try to find his older brother Zepo who had disappeared.

Had died. Had died and been killed and had the last years of his life stolen and his soul sucked out of his body.

But, hey, Bepo's gonna end up with a nakama because of it! 🧡 🐻‍❄️ 🧡

However, he had accidentally boarded a ship going to the North Blue and ended up here, and he wants to learn navigation to make it back to Zou.

So we know Zou is on the back of a giant elephant, we saw how steep the climb up and down was. When it says "Bepo left" does it mean Bepo was sitting at the edge of Zou eating the snacks his mom had packed him, singing a little silly song about all the different types of monks as he leans over, peering down through the clouds, and while doing so dropped one of his fried dumplings And without thinking reached out to grab it - oh, no, his lunch snack! Splash!

At which point he was miles below where anyone on Zou could see him, treading water, unable to get anyone's attention...... Oh, and his dumping got all soggy, not that he doesn't eat it anyway. And at some point while swimming to desperately try and keep up with Zunisha, when he happens to spot a chunk of ice because it's the grand line and weather is weird. Oh, look, the perfect place to curl up for a nap.

And when he wakes up he's being pulled up aboard some scary looking ship with a bunch of strange, smelly hairless monkey mins and before he can even ask of they could follow that giant elephant - that's where he lives - or if they had maybe met Zepo. He's Bepo's older brother and he hasn't been home in months and - hey, owe! Why are they pushing so much! Oh, they're giving Bepo a room, that's nice but he does really - slam, lock.

These pirates are gonna get so drunk celebrating their good luck. The second the saw the whatever he was curled up on the ice they knew immediately they could either eat it or sell it. Good news whichever one it turned out to be, as far as they're concerned.

Law tells Bepo to come with him, and the two of them go back to Wolf's house. After hearing Bepo's story, Wolf agrees to take him in as well, so long as he works.

Okay, it's starting to feel like Wolf only listens to their sad backstories to make sure no one is like likely to miss them and come poking around. I mean, what's the point in having all these child slave as if they're parents come and swoop them away right as you're really getting them trained to be good at doing random arrows and flying knives?

(Honestly, Wolf taking in children like that is HELLA suspicious. -- Katrin)

In which case a like 9 year old Bepo would have had to climb aboard a ship headed to North Blue and the crew has to like him enough not to throw his stowaway ass right back in the sea but not enough to help him get back to Zou or even just dropped him off before they crossed the calm belt so he was at least still on the right see.

Yeah, no, he was cubnapped. Plain and simple.

One night when they are in bed, Bepo asks Law why he took him in. Law does not have an answer, but realizes that although losing everyone on Flevance caused him to become distant from the world, the kindness of Corazon and now Wolf has started making him believe in people again.

Hey, so, it's really great that Wolf didn't immediately sell Law out to Doffy and also has given him a place to stay in exchange for a few mere hours of life endangering child labour, but let's not go putting him on the same level as Corazon.

Like, yeah, Corazon literally sacrificed his life to try and help Law, and that made him feel a flicker of human emotion again, but he still needed that extra push of an inventor so incompetent that he would be charged with willful murder before manslaughter who wouldn't sell him out to a man it sounds like would definitely torture and kill the kid in exchange for him working at Wolf's Hut Of Death for free. That's when Law finally remembered what it meant to be kind.

A month later, Law and Bepo see an explosion in the forest, and find Shachi and Penguin severely injured. They were on the verge of death after being attacked by a boar, and Penguin's right arm had been blown off. Law and Bepo race the two of them to Wolf's farm, and Law has Bepo stop their bleeding.

...

Just what?

So like,

Why did Penguin have a bomb on him? Or did the boat blow it off? Is this like a Wolf made boar?

What were these two boys doing just wandering around in the woods? Holding hands probably.

Law this is exactly what your power is actually met for. But, no, let's not call a room NOW. Instead, Bepo, grab the two boys, Law will grab the arm, then they'll hurry back through the forest to Wolf's farm where Law will then order Bepo - who again is nine and also has even less medical training than Law, not too mention no magical doctoring fruit abilities and furring polar bear paws are hardly the most sanitary things to have near open wounds - to stop Penguin's bleeding. A feat it feels like Law should have easily been able to pull off with two hand gestures and some awkward English

I mean, come on, Trafalgar! This is your chance to use the power of the Ope Ope no mi for some actual emergency ope-ing!

*sigh*

What's the french for, "But, being a fucking idiot who had to make a big dramatic scene out of everything, Law decided it would be better to go on foot."

Looks like we're going to find out next chapter.

.

[goldencherryhazz]

Work from home

A/N: first smut piece, let me know your thoughts, pls don’t copy my work, feedback and notes would be much appreciated!probably some mistakes 🤍

daddy!harry x sub!reader

Warnings: smut, daddy kink, oral, spanking, fluff. Pure filth basically.

WC: 3k

Harry hated leaving y/n, just so that he could endure countless meetings on zoom with his team, producers and whatnot when he could be spending time with his girl, after having to spending so long away from each other whilst he was on tour, but he knew it had to be done due to the ongoing pandemic, and the world basically coming to a halt. He loved his job and his fans, so he was going to do anything he could remotely, to try and bring some normalcy to this whirlwind.

Now Harry was a hard working man, and once he was in the zone, he didn’t liked to be interrupted until he was finished. He had left a kiss to her head when he left to go to his office a mere 2 hours ago which made her stir from her slumber. She wanted more, and had fallen back to sleep with the thought of being stuffed with his cock, leaving her to wake up again with the feeling of emptiness and need.

She tried to snap out of it, but doing that didn’t stop her from falling into subspace, she genuinely tried to get herself off, to satisfy herself, she started by lifting he shirt up, hissing as the chilly air came into contact with her nipples, hardening them, she pinched each one, twiddling them between her forefinger and thumb, before venturing lower down her stomach, tracing her hands over it until she touched the band of her sleep shorts, she wasted no time it taking them off and flinging them over the side of the bed, she then touched over her damp pussy, starting to rub light circles onto her clit, getting even wetter at the thought of Harry teasing her little cunt then fucking her into oblivion, she then teased two fingers over her entrance before pushing them in and curving them so that they hit her sweet spot, pushing them in and out, but getting no closer to cumming, she eventually gave up after about 5 minutes, and then made a decision, which led her to where she is now...

Stood outside Harry’s office, clad in one of her best sets of lingerie, that she knew Harry loved, as a lure to try and convince him, she took in a nervous breath, she hoped that he wouldn’t decline her, she couldn’t wait any longer. Y/n was willing to do anything in order to be able to have Harry make her cum, she just wanted the tingling sensation in he clit to be dealt with.

She knocked twice, opening the door as soon as she heard a gruff ‘come in` , she took two steps into the room, shutting the door behind her, before waiting patiently for Harry to stop typing and look up at her.

‘What the fuck are you wearing darling` he uttered already knowing the already obvious answer.

She took in the way he looked her up and down, almost hungrily, he was trying not to just give in to her which was quite impossible most of the time, he could feel his cock stirring in the loose fabric of his sweats, but he knew that she knew that he didn’t like to be disturbed whilst he was working, if she wanted him that badly, he was going to make her work for it.

‘Really need you daddy' she said without hesitation.

‘Aww baby, you feeling subby today` he cooed.

‘Yeah, tried to make myself cum, but I knew it wouldn’t be the same as you, my clits tingling daddy’

‘Well unfortunately for you daddy’s working, how bad do you need me baby, tell me’ he questioned, resting his head on the palm of his hand.

‘Need you to fuck me daddy, need to feel you inside me, I want you to choke me, be a little rough with me, I’m just feeling really empty` she choked out, her eyes glazing over in frustration.

The sudden sound of an incoming zoom call made its way through the room, he looked at her dead in the eyes ‘I’ve got an idea baby, how about you get yourself off on the corner of my desk, you’ve got to be quiet though, don’t want anyone to knowing what my naughty girls doing, and no cumming, you understand baby?’

‘Yes daddy` she said, walking over to his desk, her knees slightly weak.

He answered the call, greeted his team, trying not to get distracted by y/n as she hovered over the corner of his desk, before bending her knees slightly, her clothed clit coming into contact with the cold surface of the wood, making her hiss quietly, she braced both of her hands on the desk, before starting to slide her pussy back and forth, creating a delicious friction that she couldn’t get enough of.

Harry managed to focus on the meeting for the majority of it, flicking his eyes back to her every so often, watching as she traced he dainty fingers over her bare tummy, toying with her breast, he could feel himself getting harder and harder under his desk, to the point where he could feel his cock throbbing, y/n had managed to get through the call without making too much noise, only received a few warning glares when she moaned a little to loudly when she could feel herself on the brink of a release, knowing that she couldn’t cum, it was torture basically, the mixture of friction, Harry’s voice and knowing that he would probably he rock hard by now, but she knew that it would be worth it if she kept it up for a bit longer.

A little while later Harry was uttering goodbye’s to his team, sighing in relief as he practically slammed his computer shut, y/n was lost in pleasure , soo much that she hadn’t taken any notice that Harry had finished his call. He palmed himself to try and releave some of the building pressure in his cock, he knew that he would give into her eventually, but he was going to mess with her a little more before that.

‘Baby, come over here` she obeying like a little puppy, instantly walking towards him, becoming giddy at the thought that she might finally be getting what she wanted, more like needed.

Harry patted his thighs, signaling for her to straddle him, he could see that her panties were practically soaked through as she sat directly on his cock, making him hiss, she placed her hands on his shoulders, before Harry placed his hand on the back of her head, bringing her in for a hungry kiss, teeth clashing, thier tongues dancing with each other, the desperation making them both impossibly hornier.

Harry broke away from this kiss first, both of them gasping for air, she ran her thumb over the smooth skin of his jawline, his ringless fingers grasping at her hips.

‘Are you going to fuck me now daddy` she says out of the blue, really wanting the ache in her pussy to be dealt with.

Oh darling, didn’t think I forgot that you interrupted me whilst I was working did you, moaning whilst I was talking to my team, my friends, they could have heard you, ya know, you know daddy doesn’t like to share, dont you baby, think I need to teach you a lesson first.’

‘But I was a good girl daddy` she whimpered

‘Yes you were, still doesn’t excuse you from interrupting me though.’

She huffed ‘no baby, don’t get all huffy and puffy with me, you decided to walk into my office in your bra and panties whilst I was working, could’ve waited you know, and if you did I would be fucking you right now, but we’re here, so baby, how about you get my rings out and put them on for me, think someone deserves a spanking.

She slowly turned in his lap, reaching into the second draw in his desk to retrieve his rings, shakily placing them on thier own designated finger.

‘How many spanks do you think you should get today doll’

‘4’ she said hopefully.

‘Only four baby, best make it five then, an extra one for good look, ey.’

She rolled her eyes which Harry caught, ‘I can make it 6 if you want baby` he said gripping her chin lightly.

‘No, I’m sorry daddy’ she whimpered

‘You better be, you’re lucky that I’m even considering letting you have my cock today’

Y/n knew she had to tred carefully now, so she stood up and faced away from him, before bending over his desk, bracing herself, and willing to take whatever Harry had to offer. She secretly loved when Harry spanked her, the feeling of his hand crashing down onto her ass, his cold rings making little indents on her skin, the dominance he had over her as he marked her, she loved it and Harry did too.

Harry had stood up at this point ‘are you ready doll, want you to count each one for me.

‘Okay dad-fuck, daddy’ she squealed in surprise as his hand came crashing down, the sound of the slap reverberating through the room, his hand running over the supple flesh.

‘One’ she whimpered

*slap*

‘Two’

*slap*

‘Three’

‘Doing so good baby, only a couple more’ he smirked loving the control he had over her.

*slap*

‘Four’

*slap*

‘Five’ she cried, small tears in her eyes from the intensity, Harry marvelled over his work, as he could see what looked like two red handprints over both her ass cheeks, he smoothed over the skin lightly not wanting to cause her any more pain.

‘You okay baby’ he asked, wanting to make sure he hadn’t actually hurt her, they had already made a safe word, but he would never forgive himself if he hurt his girl.

‘Yeah, I’m okay daddy’ she sniffled slightly.

‘Think you deserve my cock now baby, took that soo well, such a good little slut for daddy aren’t you, went through all of that, just so you could get my cock.’

‘Oh I’d do anything for your cock daddy’ she says making him go wild, he instantly gripped her shoulder, making her stand up straight, before turning he around to bring her in for another heated kiss. ‘Jump’ he muttered between kisses, to which she obliged, wrapping her legs round his waist and her arms rounds his neck, practically like a koala bear.

He slowly back up to the desk again carefully laying her down not breaking the kiss, y/n being quiet relieved as the cool wood soothed her sore ass, Harry pressed himself into her, wanting to feel every inch of her body, she could also feel his hard cock dig into the side of her thigh.

She starts tugging at the end of his t-shirt, hinting for him to take his clothes off in which he happily obeyed, he had opted for no boxers today making the process even quicker, she saw the way his thick length sprang into his bare belly once he had taken his t-shirt and sweats off, throwing them not caring where they landed, the sight made her mouth water, she could see the large head of his cock was a shade of angry red leaking pre-cum, and the large protruding purple vein on the underside of his cock, which she couldn’t wait to feel against her walls.

Harry then wastes no time in ripping her underwear off of her, her juices now coating the inside of her thighs, she looked delicious and Harry could resist having a taste, so he dipped his head down, holding her legs apart, licking a large stripe through her folds which made her buck her hips up into his mouth.

‘Holy fuck’ she moaned, her clit being a little sensitive, but she honestly didn’t care right now.

He continued swirling his tounge around her pussy, dipping into he weepy hole occasionally, making her squirm in his grip, he couldn’t get enough of her sweet taste, he could stay between her legs all day if he could.

‘Feels so good daddy, but I really want your cock’ she whimpered.

‘Yeah, you want my cock baby, you can have my cock’ he finishes with a kiss to her clit, before trailing sloppy kisses up her belly towards the valley of her breasts, reaching one hand beneath her to unhook her bra, in which she arched he back slightly, helping him remove the lacy fabric, once she was completely bare beneath him, he takes one of her nipples into his mouth, swirling his tounge around the pebbled nub, doing the same to the other. He eventually made his way back to her lips, after leaving multiple hickeys on her collar bones and neck, marking her as his ‘you’re so beautiful darling’

He put his hand on either side of her head, her hands roaming over his beautifully inked arms, tracing over certain tattoos, making a shiver run up his spine, loving the gentleness of her fingers, ‘m’gonna fuck you now baby’ he says lining his cock up with her entrance ‘please, daddy’ she begs, he finally slips into her in one long thrust, making her arch her back and her eyes roll into the back of her head ‘Daddy Fuck..holy shit, you’re so big’ she cried feeling her walls stretch around his cock.

Harry also a groaning mess ‘so tight for me, s’like you were made for me’

He regains his composure before pulling almost all the way out and thrusting sharply into her cunt, starting to set a steady rhythm ‘not gonna last long doll’, her legs wrap around his waist, wanted him to be as close as possible, her hands find home on his back, her grip starting to make tiny red scratches, which he would later be reminded of when he took a shower.

Harry was now fucking her hard and deep, hitting her sweet spot with every thrust, the only sound in the room was skin hitting skin, the squelching sound of he pussy as he fucked her, breathy moans, and the occasional ‘daddy fuck yes’. He felt like he could burst with how good he felt, her warm, wet walls completely engulfing him, ‘who does this cunt belong to pet.’

‘You daddy, it’s all yours’ she breathes out, making him moan into her mouth as he kissed her plushy lips, her stomach flipping at the admittance.

‘Fuck baby gonna make me cum, you close, want you to cum with me’ she threw her head back at a particularly deep thrust, the pleasure becoming overwhelming ‘no baby’ he said gripping her chin, making her look at him again ‘want you to look at me when you fall apart, can you don’t that for me’

‘Yes daddy, m’so close, I’m gonna cum round your cock, so hard’ she whimpered

‘Oh baby, fuck’ her words making hit topple over the edge, his thrusts turning sloppy, ‘I’m cumming, cum with me pet. At this command her limbs turned limp, her head spinning, toes curling, screaming ‘daddy’ like it was the only word she knew, she didn’t think she had cum that hard in her life, Harry painting her walls, his release starting to leak out of her weepy hole, he eventually collapsed on top of her, still maintaining eye contact with her, trying to hold his weight up with his hand, so that he wouldn’t squash her. Harry hadn’t stopped thrusting into her to merely ride out thier highs, basking in both of thier releases, her cunt fluttering round his cock, milking it dry, he rested his head on hers, kissing her softly.

She tried pushing him away after a while when here muscles started spasming, in which he instantly stilled inside her, not wanting her to black out or anything. ‘You good baby, did soo well for me’

‘Don’t think I’ve cum that hard in my life’ she whispered hoarsely, her voice sore from screaming.

‘came hard too baby, can’t get enough of your cunt, m’gonna pull out now, hold my hand might sting a little’

She gripped into his hand, he slowly slipped out of her making her whimper at the loss of contact, starting on feel his cum drip down her thighs, Harry groaning at the sight, ‘looks so pretty with my cum dripping out of you’ he said leaving a soft kiss to her clit ‘can you stand baby’

‘cant feel my legs H’ she smirked knowing that this was fuelling his ego, a lazy smile spreading over her face, slowly starting to slip out of her subspace

He chuckled with her, ‘well I was thinkin’, how about we get cleaned up and take a nice hot bath, and then we can put a film on and cuddle.’

‘Mhmmm’ she hummed ‘that’s sounds perfect’

‘Wait, do you still have meetings’

‘No baby, that was the last one’ he smiled

‘Yayyyy’ she cheered her head still slightly fuzzy

He reached his hands out for her to grab so that she could sit up, hissing as all of her weight went onto her still very sore bum, that she would be reminded about for days to come.

‘We’ll get you an ice- pack as well darling’ he smirked

She managed to stand up on very shaky legs, falling into his bare chest, his arms wrapping round her so that she wouldn’t fall, kissing the top of her head ‘are you going to interrupt me whilst I’m working again baby’

‘Oh definitely daddy’ she whispered into his warm chest!

[stargazing-enby]

“I can’t believe you told them you were my fiancé” + Drarry 😘

Thank you @stavromulabetaaa @secretlycrazyhummingbird and anon for your prompts! I turned them into a New Years story, I hope that's all right 😁 

Thanks @april-thelightfury115 for betaing!

Drarry | 2k | Teen and Up | Fake Fiancés, Auror Partners, Locked Down Together, Love Confessions | Read on AO3

“...And we’re still unsure whether the situation will be safe enough for us to marry in spring, so that’s why we haven’t organised much yet. Don’t worry, you’ll be the first to know as soon as we have a date.”

Harry, mind still fuzzy with sleep, empty mug in hand, stopped in his tracks by the living room door. Had he heard right?

“We understand, Draco,” came Narcissa’s voice from the Floo. “But you must understand our concerns, too.”

“I do, mother. But you know this was necessary.”

“We do,” Lucius said. “The most important thing is that we’re all safe right now, even if we missed having you home last night.”

Harry didn’t hear the end of the conversation—didn’t notice Draco walking into the kitchen a minute later; he was too busy frowning at the kettle. 

“Morning,” said Draco from behind him. “Didn’t know you were up.”

“Didn’t know you were engaged,” Harry said without thinking—without turning around, without even understanding why he didn’t want to turn around; didn’t want Draco to see the whirl of emotions unravelling in his chest.

“Oh,” Draco said, voice low. “You heard that.”

Harry shook his head, eyes still fixed on the kettle. 

“Not on purpose.” His words came out strained, and he cursed himself inwardly. Why did he even care? It wasn’t like Draco’s personal life was any of his business. Sharing a flat didn’t make them friends, now did it? No matter how much Harry had grown to enjoy having the git around all the time, and watching him fall asleep while they watched telly together at night, and getting to see Draco’s tousled hair in the mornings—

Draco sighed—a slow, heavy sound—and leaned against the counter beside him. Harry did look up at him then, and the maelstrom of emotion probably still all over his face came to an abrupt halt when he realised Draco was holding back a giggle.

“I’m not engaged, Potter,” he said, grin widening. “You look really upset at the idea, though. It’s a cute look on you.”

Draco’s mirth was beautiful, and so, so good at softening Harry from inside out. Still, Harry crossed his arms over his chest with an indignant huff, grumbling, “Sod off, I thought you were keeping an engagement from me!” When Draco only laughed at him, he added, “Why on Earth do your parents think you’re engaged, then?” 

“I’ll tell you,” Draco said through another giggle, “but don’t murder me. I’m the best Auror partner you’ll ever have.”

Harry just raised his eyebrows at him—curiosity and concern mixing with a subtle hint of betrayal that refused to fade away just yet.

“My parents are…very traditional,” Draco started.

“I’d gathered that much, thank you.”

“Shut up, you giant prick. The thing is, they firmly believe people must live with their parents or on their own until they marry. Sharing a living space with anyone other than your spouse is…improper to them. I’m sure I don’t need to go into detail as to why.”

“You really don’t,” Harry said, grimacing. 

“So when I told them I was moving in with you temporarily, I sort of…kind of…had to tell them we were engaged, and the only reason I was moving in with you before getting married was that we wanted to wait until the pandemic was over to have a big wedding with all our loved ones.”

To Harry’s credit, he didn’t drop the mug full of piping hot coffee all over himself.

He did gape at Draco for a good three seconds, though.

“Your parents think we’re engaged?”

“That’s what I said, yes.” Draco had the decency to look sheepish, at least. “If it’s any consolation, they also trust me to remain chaste until my wedding night, so they don’t think you and I have—”

“Oh my god.”

“I would never, anyway. They raised me well.”

“Stop. Shut up.” Harry rested the mug on the kitchen table—sat heavily on a chair, gaze unfocused. “But didn’t you explain—”

“I did explain to them I was moving in with you because we work together and it’s safest to have you as the only person in my bubble so I don’t put them at risk, yes. They argued I had enough money to rent a place for myself, and I panicked and told them you and I had plans to marry anyway, so it wasn’t all that bad, since they trust me to wait until my wedding night to—” 

“Yeah, yes, got it.” Harry pressed his eyes closed, desperately trying to will images of a virginal Draco Malfoy draped over a white king-sized bed from his mind. “Were you planning on telling me any of this? You’ve been here for weeks…” 

“I was, of course.” 

Harry side-eyed him.

“It’s just—I guess…I was waiting for the right time to tell you, and it never really came up. And don’t give me that look! Remember how long it took you to tell me you weren’t dating Ginny anymore?” 

“That’s different!” Harry said. 

“Potter, you let me send both of you a Christmas card as though you were a couple and replied to it with her because it felt too awkward to tell me you’d broken up!” 

Harry took a sip of his coffee to avoid Draco’s gaze. 

“That may be true,” he muttered eventually, when he looked up at Draco again and found him still looking expectantly at him. “But this involves me directly. I mean, what if I’d answered a Floo call from them while you were in the bathroom and they’d brought up the engagement?” 

“Excuse you, I never schedule anything at bathroom hours!” 

“I...don’t want to know what that means.” Would it be too much for him to bury his face in his arms and fall right back asleep? “What are we going to do now?” 

“We wait until lockdown is over and pretend we’ve broken up and are no longer engaged, of course.” 

“What, so your parents hate me forever?” Harry asked. “No, thank you!”

“What do you mean, no thank you? The alternative, in case you hadn’t noticed, is to marry me, Potter!” 

“You’re making my year start with a headache,” Harry groaned. “I hope you’re happy.” 

“Very much so, actually,” Draco said. “Because you will pretend you’re my fiancé over Floo, won’t you? My parents have been asking to talk with you directly, and if it doesn’t happen soon, they’re going to start thinking you’re a bad husband…” 

“Fiancé! I mean—flatmate. Colleague. Ugh. Fine. Fine. I’ll do it,” he said when Draco just pouted dolefully. He couldn’t resist those puppy eyes, dammit. “But I’ll be cursing you to hell and back in my mind the entire time.” 

Draco’s grin was definitely not worth the sacrifice. 

***

“Harry! What a delight to finally be able to talk to you. Draco says you’ve been busy with work matters lately.” 

“Y-Yeah, it’s been chaos,” Harry said, resisting the urge to glare at Draco and hoping Narcissa couldn’t see the puzzle sitting on the coffee table or the stack of movies by the sofa through the Floo. “I’m really glad to see you, too.” Fuck, that’d sounded awfully awkward. “Happy new year, by the way—let’s hope it’s a better one.” 

“Oh, I’m sure it will be. The year an offspring gets married is always among the best of a mother’s life.”

“Right. Of course.” Add ‘upsetting Narcissa terribly’ to the list of reasons to curse Draco. 

“And I imagine it will be an even happier year for you two, especially if a future heir is in the picture by the end of it!” 

ADD ‘ALMOST CHOKING TO DEATH ON MY SALIVA’ TO THE LIST OF REASONS TO—

“Mother, please, I think it’s a little bit to early for that—” 

“I know, I know, sorry.” She didn’t sound sorry at all. “I’m just really excited for you, my Draco. You’ve wanted this for so long…”

Harry’s heart skipped a beat. 

“Harry, you are one very lucky man, I hope you know that,” Narcissa went on, oblivious to the look Harry and Draco were sharing—the colour drained from Draco’s cheeks, a breath caught in Harry’s lungs. “I do hope you will be taking the Malfoy name, too! It would be an honour to have you as a part of our family tree…”

She went on about the Sacred Twenty-eight for what seemed like forever, and Harry was only vaguely aware of Draco interrupting her with the excuse they had to get back to work and ending the call after a round of good-byes. 

For a moment, they both stared into the faceless flames. 

“You’re not going to buy it if I tell you I really do need to get back to work, right?” Draco said after a moment, voice low. 

“You know the answer to that.” 

Draco huffed. 

“Well, then, go ahead and ask what you want to ask. Don’t make me suffer for longer than necessary.” 

Harry sneaked a glance in Draco’s direction. Unlike a few moments before, his face was a dark shade of red, hand clutching the edge of the carpet, knees drawn close to his chest. 

“I don’t want to ask if you don’t want to tell me,” Harry murmured, looking back into the flames. 

“It’s not like I can Obliviate you,” Draco retorted. “You heard what you heard.”

Harry nodded. 

“That you’ve wanted me for a very long time.”

Draco didn’t reply. 

Harry glanced at Draco’s hand again, now playing nervously with the fringe of the carpet, and, after a moment of hesitation that faded with his next exhale, he reached out and rested his hand on it. Draco’s fingers stilled under his touch, and Draco’s eyes found his—wide, scared, vulnerable. 

He dared run the tips of his fingers over Draco’s knuckles, and his own breath caught when he heard Draco’s hitch. 

“Draco…” Harry started, not knowing what he was even going to say. “The past few weeks have been… they’ve been—”

“Don’t,” Draco said, voice strained. “Don’t. Just—” He looked away again. “Just tell me you just want to be colleagues and be done with it, please.” 

“Maybe that’s not what I want.” He slipped his fingers between Draco’s soft own; squeezed them gently. “Maybe what I want isn’t so different from what you want. You don’t know what’s going on inside my mind. You have no idea what the past few weeks have meant to me.” 

Draco didn’t move under his touch—didn’t seem to move at all, except for the quick, uneven rise and fall of his chest. When he talked, the words came out quickly, in a whisper, as though he was terrified to hear himself say them.

“What are you saying, Potter?”

“What I’m saying is I want more of this. More puzzles, and movies, and more of your way-too-salty chicken soup, and more evenings and mornings by your side. I’m saying I hadn’t realised until very recently how much I want more of you, Draco. But I do. Merlin, I do.” 

A sound somewhere between a whine and a choked cackle came out of Draco’s throat.

“You sound like I’ve actually proposed to you, you idiot,” he groaned. Harry rolled his eyes at him, squeezed his fingers yet again.

“I’m being serious!” he said, unable to hold back a laugh. “Don’t laugh at me!”

“I’m not! I’m just—this whole situation, it’s…”

“I know,” Harry murmured. “But it doesn’t have to be. Things don’t have to be so different now. I mean, we already work together and we’ve been having movie nights every Saturday for, what, three years now? And now we live under the same roof, we cook meals together, we fall asleep together on the couch…Merlin. We’re already like a married couple, aren’t we?” Harry said, horrified. “No wonder your parents bought the engagement story!”

“Wait till I tell you they were actually surprised it hadn’t happened sooner…”

Harry buried his face in his knees to stifle a groan.

“Come on,” he said after a moment, and stood up still holding on to Draco’s hand. “Let’s make some lunch and pretend like this wasn’t the most embarrassing conversation we’ve ever had.”

Draco’s fingers were still comfortably hooked around his as they made their way to the kitchen.

[arcadejohn127-9]

Hi if your requests are still open can you do something with the demon brothers + new datables (or not if that's too much!) comforting an MC who just got off a shift at work and is frustrated from customers and needs some reassuring words/cuddles to make them feel better? Thanks so much~😊💞

A message for all the workers who are employed despite the pandemic or were employed but had to stop due to the pandemic, YOU ARE THE REAL ONES!!

Thank you so much for all the hard work you're doing/done, especially retail. You guys are always being supportive and understanding.

I'm so sorry for all you who's had to deal with Karen's and uncomfortable customer's who's tried hitting on you or just being disturbing

I wish the government wasn't doing you all dirty. Money can be such a serious issue and now it's gotten even worse, I just wanna say I'm proud and thankful!

Brothers + undateables comfort MC who just finished a hard day of work

Lucifer:

You found him in his study, hunched over his desk

Seeing him so deep into work made you regret coming to him

You were just about to head back up but he spotted you

"Welcome back, I'll be with you in a moment, I I just need to- Dear? What's wrong?"

You immediately broke down into tears

In seconds you were being cradled in his arms, sitting in his lap and having soothing circles rubbed into your back

He's letting you release your frustrations, ignoring how wet his shirt was getting

When you finally calmed down, you apologized for getting his shirt wet

"Nonsense, tell me what's upset you, was it your manager again?"

You explained how your day went, how costumers were yelling at you and the work getting overwhelming

"You did everything you could, they're lucky to have such a hard worker like yourself, I'll be phoning your boss as soon as I can to get you a raise."

Mammon:

He picked you up in his car, waving you over with some take out sitting in your seat

As soon as you buckled in you took your portion of take out

"So, how was work? Did you finally get your pay check?"

You sighed, shoving your face with food as you ranted about how difficult today has been

The more you spoke the more upset you got, sniffling and trying to hide your sobs

He couldn't stand it; he pulled over as soon as he could and turned to you

"They can't be treating you like that! What are their names and faces? I'll go sort them out, no one treats my baby like that!"

You laughed, telling him he can't beat up your costumers

"You can't do it but I can, don't worry I'll find a way."

He pulled you into a hug, both of you laughing when he choked himself on his seatbelt

After you two unbuckled he just let you lean against him, having how own mini rant about how amazing you are and people not treating you like you're the most valuable treasure in the world

Levithan:

He was gaming, of course, when he heard you knock he immediately asked what's the secret password

"Please, not today, I can barely think right now, can I just come in?"

Usually he's more stubborn than that but hearing how desperate your voice was, he let you in

Knew something was bad when you immediately climbed into his bed tub and smother yourself with his body pillow

He let his game play in the background, ignoring the angry messages from his team mates

"Work stress?"

All he heard was a muffled sound of agreement

"Those damn normies-! What did they do to you? Was it the Karen's again?"

You yelled into the pillow, ranting about your day and letting it be muffled but still loud enough for him to hear

He scooted over in his chair, watching you peak your head out

Tears staining your cheeks as you frowned at him

He blushed as he immediately kissed both of your cheeks, cupping your face

"wanna play employee simulator? It lets you fight the annoying customers."

Satan:

"There's my hard worker." He kissed your cheek, greeting you at your bedroom door

"You seem upset, what's the matter?"

You immediately started explaining what happened toward, leaning against him as you went on and on

Satan could feel his anger flair up as he listened

He couldn't stand how the customer's have been treating you and the fact no one was willing to give you some emotional support at work?

Not even a pat on the shoulder or words of praise of how you handled it

But he kept himself in check, holding you close

"That must of been horrible, I can't imagine how tired you must be, let's go rest, okay? You did amazing today, kitten."

You sniffled, asking if he really meant what he said

He nodded, dragging you to your bed and telling you how proud he is

Asmodeus:

"My poor sweetheart! You look absolutely exhausted! What happened today?!"

He caressed and rubbed your skin, soothing out your frown lines and any sign of stress

You let him pamper you whilst you went off about how work was

Recieving alot of 'No!'s, 'They didn't!' and hums of displeasure

He tsked, rubbing the soothing cream into your palm

"They're just awful, aren't they? This kind of stress isn't good for you, Perhaps I should come with you! See how great you are in person."

You immediately butted in, not wanting him to force himself to do something he didn't want to do

Knowing he's very mindful of his appearance and status among people

"I'll do it for you~ besides, people love me! I'll charm those horrible costumers and they'll never be rude to you again."

You insisted that he didn't have to

He then rambled on about how attractive you look when you're focused and doing work

You just laughed, sinking into his touch as he went on

Beezlebub:

He frowned when he noticed you didn't give him his 'im back' kiss

He immediately went searching for you and found you in your room

Face buried in your pillow and your body shaking

"You're crying."

A pit formed in his stomach, wondering what upset you

You told him how horrible today was, going into detail about how hard you were trying to fix the issues but they just wouldn't stop

You almost got in trouble with your manger! You could of been fired!

"You did everything you could and still kept your cool, the place would be lost without you there."

You smiled, shuffling over and giving him a big hug, he immediately returned it

He was giving you gentle comforting squeezes

slowly rocking you both side to side

"I'll eat them if they keep harassing you."

Belphegor:

"Come to your favourite demon, tell him everything that happened."

He did the grabby hands, looking up at you

You sighed, letting yourself flop in his arms as you hugged him

You wondered how he could tell how upset you were

He just grinned

"I'm smart, remember? I know when my teddy bear is upset."

You just rolled your eyes, staring off to the side as tears formed

He didn't expect you to yell in frustration

You ranted about how work was today

How costumers yelled at you and kept insisting you were lying about the products

Critizing your job and assuming things about you

Even having a few creeps come in and try to flirt with you

"Don't listen to any of them, I know who you are and you know who you are, It's impressive how professional you can be when they act like that, I would of killed them."

He listened to you ramble, hugging you and stroking up and down your back

UNDATEABLES↓

Diavolo:

"I didn't expect you to come back so late, did something happen?"

You explained how your job forced you to do extra hours, despite not getting over time pay

He made a mental note to visit your workplace on one of your day's off

You then proceeded to go on about how the costumer's were treating you

How stressful and harsh today was

Diavolo just listened, nodding along

He felt his jaw clench

"Tell me more on the bed, your feet must be aching."

You both laid on his bed, you continued your story about today whilst he held your hand

"This is unforgivable, I cannot stand to imagine people being so rude to you, I know you do your very best and would never deserve such treatment."

He was cuddling you all night, wanting to sooth your upset heart

Whenever he felt you shake against him, trying to combat your tears he just gently patted you

Encouraging you to just let it all out, praising you for how amazing you are

Barbatos:

As soon as you arrived back, he was quick to help you undress

Handing you your pajamas and helped you take off your shoes

He noticed a new blister and your sigh of content when you were finally out of them

He works aswell so he understands the struggles

"another long day? tell me what happened, you need to let your frustrations out."

And you did just that

You poured your heart and soul into your stressed out grunts

Becoming more upset the more you spoke about your tough day

Getting more upset when your manager only made it worse by blaming the costumers anger on you

All you did was tell her what you were taught to say!

"That won't do, I'll be sure to have my lord handle things with your boss, tomorrow."

You told him that you didn't want to be a hassle but he silenced you

Suddenly embarassing you as he patted your head

"I'll fix this for you, while I cannot change the customer's I can change how your higher ups are treating you, you don't deserve this."

Solomon:

When you met up with him, you had to try and hide how much you've been stressing

But Solomon was known to be wise for a reason

He immediately figured out something was wrong

"I'm Solomon the wise, you cannot fool me, what happened today?"

As soon as you tell him what happened today

He pulls out a potion, suspiciously doesn't tell you what it does, and tells you to splash it in difficult customers eyes

You were sure it was posion or some weird liquid that came from his cooking attempts

Then again those were basically the same thing

"if the eyes don't work, I could put it in a spray, it'll stop them from yelling at you again~!"

You were very tempted

You never wanted to be yelled or harassed by a customer again

But you didn't want to get fired for assaulting a customer or even worse, killing one

"You followed protocol exactly as you were told, they shouldn't be mad at you for doing your job but don't worry, I'll make all your tears-"

He suddenly wiped under your eyes, catching you off guard

"Disappear!"

Simeon:

"My little lamb, tell me what's bothering you."

He sat you down on the sofa, grasping your hand

You deflated

You rested your head on his chest and played with his hand

He listened to you rant and ramble about your horrible day at work

He couldn't believe what he was hearing; how rude they were and had no right to treat you like that!

"Perhaps, I shall bless you with a miracle and get rid of those rude customer's."

As wonderful as that sounded

You joked how unangelic it seemed; using his power to 'get rid of people'

Hearing a dangerous implication in his voice

"It is a good deed that will do many a favour, I believe it to be extremely kind, after all, you didn't do anything wrong."

Stayed and cuddled with you until you fell asleep, preferring how happy and peaceful you looked than how you looked before

Stressed and clearly upset

Luke:

"Those demons!! I've been telling you they're horrible creatures, they can't be treating you like that!"

Perhaps ranting to him wasn't the wisest decision

But he was so eager to see you after work and wanted to know what was wrong

He was hugging your hips, stomping his foot when he spoke

"You're an angel in human disguise! There's no way they could be so horrible to out without being truely evil beings!"

You tried to calm him down by picking him up

Telling him you were able to handle the situation like a champ

He felt better knowing you were able to come out on top

He hugged you as you took him back to his room

Tucking him into bed but was surprised when he grabbed you

"You're a really good person and I know you work harder than anyone else, I hope they don't be mean to you like that again."

[bartletforamerica]

How the Bartlet Administration Reacts to COVID-19

Abbey: is not taking any chances. After losing the fight to get the President to retreat to the farm or Camp David, she gets him to agree to limit himself to the oval office and the residence, with as few in person meetings as possible. Even before they’ve pulled together a White House task force, she’s made sure that everything is being disinfected and that her entire schedule is either canceled or made virtual. Her staff is the first to be working from home (and oh boy does she scold if she finds out any of them did something she thinks is foolish), with most of the rest of the White House staff following shortly after. She makes it her mission to do PSAs on what people should be doing and even does a virtual Sesame Street collaboration to teach kids how to wash their hands.

Zoey: Is not super pleased to be stuck in the Residence 24/7. She’s doing classes from her bedroom, so yay to not having to get out of bed early, but she can tell people are super disappointed that her camera is set up so that she has only a blank wall behind her [it turns out the secret service is very touchy about where you take video calls]. She also gets officially hired and given a security clearance for the sole fact that she’s one of the only people allowed to be near her dad who is tech-literate. She ends up doing some of her reading on the couch in his office so that she's on hand for when he's supposed to be skyping with the senior staff and can't figure out what link to click. She spends a lot of time worrying about Ellie, who helping do research about the virus, and texting her friends.

The President: is not happy to be closed up away from people. He also thinks that Abbey is overreacting where he's concerned. He misses actually getting to be around the younger staff. He and Zoey do a cooking from home video at C.J.'s suggestion, so that the country can see he's alive and to encourage people to not go out. They make chili and fight over whether it needs more cumin or oregano while Abbey records it and pipes in from behind the camera. The country is treated to a history of chili and a diplomatic incident nearly happens because apparently Mexicans deny having any association with it, even though most food historians say it has Mexican roots. The flaming debate doesn't stop a second episode at Thanksgiving where the country is treated to the history of the yam and all the secret spices that go into the President's stuffing. A large portion of the country gives him flack for putting Oysters in his stuffing. [In a small bedroom in an Illinois apartment a woman finally figures out why Joe Bethersonsen sounded so familiar.]

Leo: moved into the Residence because there was no way he was going to talk the President off ledges via skype for however long this lasted. He can only do so much. Zoey helps him learn to use Skype and he finds himself missing Margaret desperately even when he spends most of the day with a computer dedicated to having her on Skype so he can turn to it and ask her questions. She insists he get exercise and eat healthy (something he thinks she’s collaborating with the first lady on behind his back—they say very similar things much of the time). He skypes with Mallory on Sunday mornings over breakfast in his room and they pretend they’re at a hotel having a fancy brunch.

Charlie: is not particularly happy. He got sent home with everyone else because he’s not particularly necessary to have on hand if the president isn’t going anywhere. He’s still getting paid and he does do some work (the most important bit being hanging out on the phone with the president so he can ramble about history so Zoey can get her own reading done, Leo can browbeat the staff, and the first lady can do her own job) but he’s been ordered by the president and first lady to focus on getting extra school done while he can.

Donna: started freaking out the first day there was a rumor of a new disease in China. Then the White House shut down and even senior staff got sent home unless they absolutely needed to be in the building (basically just C.J. and some of her staff). And her roommate (not the one she'd really liked, who had a cat, but one she hopes is only temporary) works for a GOP congressman who thinks the whole thing is a hoax and bans masks in his office, so Donna is not at all happy and spends time she should be working cleaning things her roommate touches and that's sixty percent of how she ends up living with Josh.

Josh: is struggling with not being allowed to leave the house on pain of the first lady taking him to task (something about his lungs and the bullet). Even when he was putting his nose to the grindstone to make it through college and law school, he liked being around people while he studied, so he was usually in the library or a cafe rather than his room. He works best when he can bounce ideas off people and take in new ideas. When he was grounded after surgery it absolutely sucked and that was why he drove everyone crazy calling them all the time. Yeah he was bored, but he was also lonely. Plus he's not the best with technology. He very nearly went on national tv with his boxers showing, if not for Donna skyping him beforehand and making sure he fixed the camera. Between needing not to be alone and needing his assistant to be able to actually help him, the invite for Donna to stay with him slips out when she's complaining about her roommate. She shows up two hours later with two suitcases of clothes and two suitcases with pasta, toilet paper, and flour.

Donna and Josh: are handling the pandemic much better now that they're together. Josh can bounce ideas off Donna without it tying up his phone line. And she can listen in on his calls to the various members of congress about the stimulus package that they're working on. It's an even better look at Josh's job than she had before, and while it makes some of her work harder to focus on, she feels like she understands some things better than she ever has before. Josh even starts listening to her about how to sway certain congressmembers to their side. When they're not working, Donna forces Josh to cook with her so they're not entirely subsisting on delivery. They tried making bread and managed to spill half a bag of flour on the floor in the process but they ate all of it, even though it tasted pretty bland. Josh finally got Donna into baseball when it came back. Toby spit out his beer when he was on speakerphone with them and he heard Donna accurately yelling at the Mets for screwing up. Donna wears Josh's clothes more than her own, since she doesn't have to be on camera most of the time. They're platonically sharing a bed because they haven't found a convertible sofa for his living room that they like, they say, and it doesn't make sense for one of them to sleep on the couch, which they say has a spring that makes it uncomfortable to sleep on, even though Donna lounges on it all day with no problem. They are absolutely not dating and so they tell all their friends.

C.J.: spends five minutes laughing every time she gets off the phone with Josh or Donna. She loves her friends but god they're so completely in denial. It does, however, give her a much needed break. Her job has always involved a lot of people and knowing what venue to meet them in to ensure that she gets or passes on the information she needs. COVID protocols mean no more one-on-one meetings with journalists in her office, no more gaggles following her through the halls. The press corps were not happy when they moved all briefings outside and insisted on face masks and shields in addition to everyone sitting six feet apart. She gets asked about the president's health at least once a day and they start doing weekly waving from the balconies just so the press corps can get footage of him, healthy and shouting down to Danny and some of the others. Someone makes a cartoon of the president in the tower, with Abbey as his dragon keeper and though no one is willing to justify a cartoon with a comment, privately C.J. thinks it's accurate. She's always admired Abbey's fierce protectiveness of her family, even when she doesn't agree with every way it expresses itself or when it interferes with C.J.'s job. She has to come up with new ways to push the White House agenda (keep the economy afloat, stay home, no, don't listen to the GOP governors or those running for the primary, those ideas are not good, go the fuck home and stop having parties) and while some work, others bomb. It would help if everyone would stay on message and not screw up.

Sam: would like to make it clear that he did not know how many people would be at that gathering. He thought he was going for an outdoor meal with just a few old friends who could help raise money for the democratic party, not a fifty-person birthday party. The media fallout nearly gets him fired. Instead he gets yelled at by C.J., then by the First Lady. Mallory even sends him a card about how stupid he was. He's pretty sure that having Donna around is the only reason that Josh hasn't made the same mistake by now. It had to have been a toss up as to which of the two of them would screw up. Sam just isn't lucky enough to have a Donna (Sam is very happy that Josh has a Donna, Sam just wants Josh to realize that he talks about Donna the same way most men talk about their wives, because it's really hard not to respond to "why do I put up with finding her hair clogging the shower drain" with "because you love her and can't live without her, stupid"). He instead has adopted a cat for company. It tries to scratch him every time he tries to pet it. Sam spends his days trying to find a way to say "fuck the economy until we've beaten the virus" in a way that is palatable to the American people while trying to remind Toby that they can't actually say that outright. This is not an easy task.

Toby: would like to tell most of the American public to shut up, stay indoors for two months, pretty much nobody excepted, and if you don't, then you get tossed out to sea. He's come within an inch of telling anti-mask people they deserve to get sick on the record and is strongly advocating that the federal government figure out a way to mandate that every person in the country, minus those with legitimate medical exceptions, get the vaccine as soon as possible. He is also about to get evicted because it turns out his neighbors do not appreciate having rubber balls bounced against the walls for hours on end. Apparently, the thud is rather annoying. He worries about everyone, though this is delivered brusquely. Out of everyone he's taking the new work from home situation the best. No one can pop in to distract him, or comment on his eating habits. And if he doesn't want to talk to someone, he can always turn his phone to silent and pretend not to have seen they called. He's not pleased the Yankees lost to the Rays (necessitating rooting for either the Dodgers or the Rays, one of which beat his team and the other which betrayed New York), but he can at least take solace in the fact that the Mets didn't even make the playoffs.