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domesticmail · 2 months

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SO UM!

#HAHAHAHAHAHAH GUYS #i had an experience last night #(i did a drug that is hard to find #not addictive and instead typically used for spiritual purposes #and that several of my exes have always wanted to try)#and i feel great today #it didn't magically resolve any emotional issues for me or anything #but i feel like. actually happy #and relaxed #and that feels great! like i can just go about doing what i want #it feels like i released my anxiety's grasp on my mind #and sort of let it go. it's still there but now it doesn't feel like it's controlling me #idk we'll see as the day goes on!!#just wanted to share #hope everyone is doing well <3

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giantkillerjack · 1 year

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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

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hansoeii · 5 months

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need some help with that?

#wasn't feeling great mentally today so I drew happy lokius because I treat them like my therapist #who needs a therapist when you have owen wilson yaoi #amirite fellas??#anyways thsi is either mobius helping loki with his tie or taking it off #I leave that up to you #did take me a good amount of time to realize that this could be seen as mobius undressing him #this might be the most accidentally suggestive art you'll ever get from me #enjoy it #loki #lokius #lokius fanart #loki fanart #mobius #loki and mobius #loki season 2 #my art #fanart #my loki art #digital art

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grayeet · 2 months

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Rainy Day ☔️

#minecraft #mineblr #minecraft aesthetic #minecraft enderman #enderman #This one's a little simpler and also late again because I wasn't feeling great today but I'm married to the grind o7

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sirazaroff · 3 months

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We are SO fuckin back

Original by @/soup-erb

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sayheykid · 6 months

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trying to figure out how to say this delicately. i do think that the pwhl is going to make some progress, and already the support for the league is showing how much of a market there is for women's sports even from a few years ago. but it's kind of been irking me to see so many posts that act like there has never been any arena for women's pro hockey before. like do you understand how many people — how many leagues!! — came before this to even make the pwhl a possibility. do you know how many people have fought tooth and nail for women's pro hockey for DECADES. i'm not saying don't support the league, but don't act like it's the perfect solution to a brand new issue

#idk i'm just thinking #how quickly people forget the outrage and devastation of the entirety of the phf being blindsided by the acquisition/merger #contracts erased. careers ended. lives uprooted.#yes women players are getting more money and more visibility! that's great!#but i can't support it wholeheartedly #i will support it because they've ensured it's the only option there is but it still feels kind of bad man #saw a post earlier that was like 'starting today. young girls will realize there's a future for them in pro hockey'#that's great! but it's not starting today!#it started with all the groundwork that's been happening for years and years and years #hockey #pwhl #phf

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tamaharu · 6 months

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dating Kyoya Ootori headcanons (Kyoya Ootori x fem reader)

He leaves you for a man

#based off that great edgeworth post of course. happy birthday kyoya.#if i stop feeling so miserable today ill. heavy sigh. draw catboy kyoya.#ohshc

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cosmicdreamgrl · 3 months

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jungkook x for youth for @jkvjimin 💜

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raziraphale · 3 months

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Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are Dead (Neptune Theatre, 2024)

#rosencrantz and guildenstern are dead #ragad #gifs #edits #billy boyd #dominic monaghan #michael blake #i suddenly wanted to try gifmaking again right as I got my concussion for some reason lol #so this is my fun reward for recovery! I've had to sit on my hands all week but I'm feeling great today 😊#it's been 2 years since i last made gifs dear lord #so forgive me bc i forgor everything

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greywoe · 5 months

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"The she-wolf laid into the squires with a tourney sword, scattering them all. The crannogman was bruised and bloodied, so she took him back to her lair to clean his cuts and bind them up with linen."

#asoiaf #asoiaf fanart #lyanna stark #howland reed #my drawings #i wonder how many times i've reread that chapter with meera's story lol #i like this moment esp it's so sweet #and clearly made an impact on howland as he followed ned into the war later.. all the way to the tower #ohhhh you know what now i want a howland and jon interaction. i want them to meet. oh man #asos #anyway i've been in a bit of a slump lately so this isn't great but eh. i've got a few backlogged as well i might upload..sometime #it was super foggy today to the point of not seeing anything which was very cool so i guess that motivated me to finish this #i like weird weather but it should have snowed damn it. there's almost always snow on my birthday so this feels like an ominous sign #also there are odd places in my neighbourhood where tons of crows and rooks and jackdaws gather for whatever reason and i see them on walks #and i always go hmm looks like a feast for crows over there. heh

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knaccblog · 10 months

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We all know that when Crowley says, "You can't leave this bookshop", what he's really saying is, "You can't leave this life we've made together", but he's too scared to include himself explicitly in it, right? It's like in the fight about Gabriel where Crowley says he wants Gabriel "nowhere near the precious, peaceful, fragile existence he's carved out for himself" but we all know he's just talking about Aziraphale because whenever he's actually talking to Jim or himself, he's only worried about what will happen to Aziraphale, not himself in the slightest. Worrying what will happen to himself is a facade he pulls up in front of Aziraphale to deflect from how deeply he loves him.

On the other hand, when Aziraphale says, "Oh Crowley, nothing lasts forever", he's really saying, "I love you so much that I am willing to give up all my most precious worldly possessions to assure that you are given the treatment and reinstatement you so deserve." His tone of voice and his face are both all love even.

Like it's just so amazingly sad that what Crowley is reading as rejection, as "you're not good enough as you are", is almost definitely Aziraphale saying he loves him more than everything else and thinks he's the most truly good soul he knows?

#good omens #good omens meta #ineffable husbands #ineffable partners #aziracrow #aziraphale #crowley #good omens crowley #GOS2 Spoilers #good omens season 2 spoilers #My GO Thoughts and Feels #these two have to stop talking in subtext I'm begging them its for their own good #like this is a master class in how to have two characters talk past each other #it's soooo messy emotionally but really great writing #today we're being brave and posting another one #we'll see if I keep this up lols

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ninja-knox-ur-sox-off · 1 year

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THE HANDSOME MONKEY KING ~ GREAT SAGE EQUAL TO HEAVEN ~ SUN WUKONG

(found wip, wasn’t gonna post but heck it the show’s got me hyped)

#Monkey King | Sun Wukong #Monkie Kid #LEGO Monkie Kid #KNOX ART (art)#feels like ages since i've posted art but yes i do that too- HGBSDF;KLAMWEF #THIS WAS SO SILLY AND FUN TO CLEAN UP AND FINISH #JUST HAD A LIGHT SKETCH AND ENDED UP FNISHING IT LIEK THIS AND ITS GREAT #VIBES OFF THE CHARTS GENTS #i've posted three times today and i regret nothing #i have no chill

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doctorsiren · 11 months

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hands

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resiliencewithin · 3 months

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Friendly neighbourhood reminder:

If you’re sick, it is so easy to feel overwhelmed, catastrophize, be in a low mood and so hard to self regulate.

Don’t think about your life. Don’t believe the things your brain tells you about you and your life.

Just be sick. Focus on rest, hydration, sleep, nutrition.

And, if life won’t allow you to engage in self care, just focus on getting through the day and remember it’s so hard because you’re sick.

#mental health #mental illness #self care #positivity #a reminder I need today #I was in a great headspace yesterday #april seemed daunting but manageable #today?#feels like it’s gonna crush me #just be sick #watch your little show #recover

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bacchuschucklefuck · 3 days

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pygmalion and galatea for aroace people

you should tell your friends what I look like, riz gukgak.

#fantasy high #fantasy high sophomore year #fhsy #riz gukgak #baron from the baronies #class swap babeyy! bard!riz that's whats goin on!#I really need tags for these now I think lmao #ask to tag #I feel like this should be tagged something. but I dont know what #in my brain after the initial kidnapping class swap baron's thing is every time riz keeps his story abt them up in front of his friends #they get a little bit closer. they send him pictures of where they supposedly are n stuff #theres a scene in my brain only of kristen and riz on top of the van and kristen is like everything kinda sucks rn can u tell me abt baron #cause what you guys have is so nice and beautiful. and riz almost doesn't but he ultimately can't deny kristen a little peace #lmao I feel like dipping into baron stuff with the class swap is like showing my whole ass online again I just. I'm a #horror person before all else... I cant stop myself. canon baron is Great and Cool but that is kind of the thing. for a horror thing theyre #Too Cool. I think cool is kind of the neutralizer of scary. when a monster is a certain amount of cool it overrides the scary #and now u just have a Cool Monster #its so fucked for bard!riz this year bc he doesn't have an office (he's mooching off the school wifi from the AV club room lol)#so there's no buffer between adventure and home life. so baron just shows up in the strongtower apartment lmao #sophomore year bard!riz looks like a slasher protag so I just leaned into it I guess. he gets a mr. x if mr. x is made up by leon kennedy #well. its worse actually. they can show up where he is at any moment theyve proven this. but they dont #they choose to punish him slowly as he lies to his friends instead. baron is mr. x if mr. x is made up by leon and also a bitch #I think its gonna pop up if class swap baron ever speaks in a comic I do but their voice comes from like. inside their hollow face #it sounds like it's a lot deeper in there than that skull should be #tbh what I have rn is kinda like a bag of loose pieces that Can fit together into something great but I dont have the energy to #really sit down with them yet lol. Im doing this inbetween other things #it comes or it doesn't! it's fine. funny how today's bad comic day also. I wont say this is for bad comic day bc all my comics are #flawless and beautiful and perfect and awesome and beautiful and the best #but u should. if u havent drawn a comic today or at all ever u should draw a comic #and discover that every comic is the best comic ever. u should do it Im so serious actually

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thelovers-2001 · 29 days

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Y'know what, I'm in a good mood today so I wanna say a few things!

Shout out to selfshippers of unpopular and/or niche media. Medias that aren't mainstream or popular. Medias fairly known due to videos and fan works on it floating around the Internet. Medias that were once popular until the hype died out.

Shout out to selfshippers of media with very few to no fan base. With F/Os with little fan work (art, fan fiction, etc.)

To artist/writer selfshippers who's F/O has no fan work and make it themselves : I am so, so proud of you. You are seriously the bravest and strongest soldiers god has ever sent.

You might've search throught the Internet for fan art, only to find a small handful and thought to yourself "Do I have to make art of my F/O myself?" Fuck yeah man, I HIGHLY recommend you do! Because you're making the art that you love. And maybe... someone out there would like it too ^^

Comshippers and proshippers DO NOT INTERACT

#💬 meera is typing...#🌟 lovely affirmations!#self ship #selfship #selfship community #selfship positivity #proship dni #I usually don't make posts like this buuuut I'm feeling great today so I wanna say nice things ^^

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