#and i don't know how to get it back
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Give me back what was mine
Of all the things my broken body has taken from me I miss my memory the most I used to be able to recall whole scripts and lists of every person I had known at the drop of a hat Losing that is something of the natural process of aging, I know Old and useless information makes way for the new But I turned 19 and my time was taken, slowly at first Snatches of hours lost to sleep here and there Creeping up faster and faster until there was little of me left When I came round from the slumber, I remembered less than i thought I would Natural, I suppose, when your body goes through a trauma But I didn’t realise that effect would be long-lasting That I’d lose the clarity of memories of a first love, of throwing up my first drinks of alcohol, of seeing my father cry for the first time Cognitively, they are still there I have told and retold them enough times to know them in a different way Half the memory is in its telling, after all But they’re always shrouded in a layer of fog Sometimes I live through an experience, knowing half of it will be gone in the blink of an eye Important moments used to be catalogued down to the very words and intonation Now I’m lucky if I remember the feeling But the worst of it, the worst feeling of all Is not even knowing how much was lost
#memory#I write so much about memory#because losing it is the hardest thing#and i don't know how to get it back#maybe that's why i obsessively play memory games#in the hope that i can hang on to a little of what i've lost#i wonder if i'll ever stop being angry about it#it's not the doctors fault it's noones fault but my shitty body and its obsession with side effects#but i'm still angry that i lost so much because of it#my writing#poetry#personal#creative writing#my poetry#writing#personal writing#spilled ink#spilled poetry#spilled thoughts#spilled feelings#spilled words#spilled emotions#spilled writing#spilled prose#spilled heart#chronically ill#chronic illness#chronic pain#chronic fatigue#chronic migraine
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(open pages for better image quality)
the moment I heard elphaba's delivery of "there's a girl i know..." in i'm not that girl i knew i had to draw this comic, i strongly recommend listening to it while you read for the full experience!
this comic is a companion to this piece (which was inspired by glinda's delivery of the same line in the i'm not that girl reprise).
pages 1-4 are from elphie's pov, pages 5-8 are from glinda's.
prints of individual pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
flower meanings in order of appearance:
#wicked#gelphie#(girl who has so many thoughts about i'm not that girl)#even jonathan bailey said i'm not that girl is a queer anthem. if nobody gets me i know he does#had to hold myself back from doing an animatic to the entire song (i don't have time)#i don't usually work in b&w so i was a little nervous but i'm really proud of how this comic turned out :')#it was a labor of love of many many weeks drawing this in between work#updated with prints for all 8 individual pages since a few people asked♡#might compile it as a little pdf zine when i have time for anyone who wants to keep it in higher resolution to re-read it#elphaba#glinda#gelphie fanart#wicked fanart#wlw#sapphic#lesbian#wlw art#sapphic art#lesbian art#comic#artists on tumblr#glinda x elphaba#elphaba thropp#glinda upland#galinda upland#i'm not that girl#flower meanings#language of flowers
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still ruminating over Lost In the Book With Spooky Skeletons Part 1, so here's a selection of some of my favorite little bits! (...some more loosely paraphrased than others) (I just feel like Idia has no room to criticize in general, okay)
anyway, I'm sure we're just going to have a fun time celebrating Halloween and nothing bad is going to happen whatsoever! :)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#lost in the book with nightmare before christmas#hajimari no halloween#calling dibs on skeleton kisses as the name of my band#man scully is just a delightful little weirdo and i'm enjoying him immensely#(i'm going with scully until we get something official just because it makes me think of x-files)#(スカリー is also how the agent's name is transliterated and i don't know if it was intentional but i love it as a bonus reference)#(i want to believe™)#gosh though#'no one at school likes me because i won't shut up about halloween and jack skellington' i'm feeling VERY attacked right now twst#look scully your people are out there#just get on the forums and -- oh wait you're probably from like the 1800s or something#(my theory is that he's from the past and there's just some Book Magic going on to bring us together)#(LOOK they made a point of saying that the book fair has been held annually for a super long time)#a hot topic goth born before hot topic was invented...so sad 😔#i dunno i could be wrong but that feels like a good working theory for now#if it wasn't for mal sensing twsty ~magic~ on him i would think he's like. a christmas elf who's going to kidnap jack in a reverse-nmbc#(not ruling that out though because it would be amazing)#god all the sprites in this event look AMAZING. loving the desaturated colors and the extra drawn-on lines 😍#i'm genuinely kinda sad that we aren't gonna get to see every character like this#who knows...maybe halloweentown will be imperiled again next year...#come back and destroy my keys again please#(that said i'm doing weirdly well so far?)#(i promised i'd save for sebek and just do cursory pulls to get the SRs and not hope for the SSRs)#(...but then leona jumpscared me four coffins in anyway. halloween magic is REAL)
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legend has it that the young witch circe and the once beautiful nymph scylla shared a complicated past...
#art#cirscylla#that's the ship name i like for them best anyway#circe#scylla#greek mythology#welcome to my greek mythos yuri#DOOMED YURI#circylla#epic the musical#do i even tag it as that? i think i should cuz epic is the reason im so into greek mythos#jorge said we might get a spinoff about their backstory and im insane over that#i know it's probably going to be about how circe loved that one guy but still a girl can dream#this is them but younger! before circe turns scylla into the horrific man-eating monster that even poseiden fears#there's just so much potential here#consider a younger and much warier circe landing on the island for the first time after being outcasted by her family for her magic#and she meets scylla there who back then is a much happier and playful person#enemies to lovers to enemies again#i don't know if they ever make it to lovers or if they were only an almost#they're about to have the worst breakup in greek history#im rambling in tags MY BAD
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face value
#it's autism torment hours for cloud strife (featuring Projection™️)#everybody just assumes the worst about cloud the moment they meet him.#i think all the time about the 'be nice!' -> 'i'm doing my best :(' thing from remake. like. all he did was answer a fucking question.#it burns because i know EXACTLY what it's like to be on the receiving end of that. 'don't be rude!' i wasn't planning on it but ok i guess?#and people getting mad because they assumed i meant something completely different than what i said.#how many times have i asked 'hey when are we leaving' (so i know when we're leaving. god forbid)#only for them to hear 'WAAA WAAAAAAA HURRY UP!!!!!!! I WANNA LEAVE RIGHT NOWWWWW UGGHHHHHH'#like ???????????#we're speaking the same language right??? RIGHT????????#cloud listen bby. just know that i'm always here for you. even if no one else got ur back.#ok i'm better now. at least until the next easily avoidable stupid misunderstanding#ffvii#cloud strife#my art <3
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floof <3 (cr. ouranxingg)
#btsgif#park jimin#jimin#bts#userbangtan#btsedit#*#*jm#*ays#trying to get back to giffing slowly and what better thing to start with than this<3.#don't know how long will i keep trying but its a start ig fgdhjfhdj.
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class swap design masterpost for convenience (from top to bottom: bard!riz, cleric!gorgug, sorcerer!kristen, barbarian!fig, artificer!adaine, and rogue!fabian)
#dimension 20#fantasy high#fhfy#fhsy#fhjy#riz gukgak#gorgug thistlespring#kristen applebees#figueroth faeth#adaine abernant#fabian seacaster#my class swap stuff! oh yeah I think I got a tag for that I'll call that#fh class quangle#gna slowly go back and get that tag on relevant posts too. for organization's sake#even tho I didnt really intend this blog to be that kinda blog lmao. we were all just gonna be out here dealin with that at our own pace#anyways uh! they! u know all the lore for the designs already I put em in tags. but otherwise this also collects like the#color keys kind of for these. mostly the things that change between designs#doing this did make me realise half of these are a Lot more consistent in color keys than the other half lol#like kristen's palette stays pretty much the same. and fabian's. the hit's mostly in the construction#a lot of this is overall like an exercise in remembering what high schoolers would actually wear and how to work in Costume pieces#on this point at least I straight up have No relevant recollection lmao all the basic education establishments I went to have uniforms#and outside of school I was. well kind of a shorts and tee guy. so#on that topic I feel like fabian's is the furthest stretch lmao. like if a guy in high school wears the same bright yellow raincoat#to school every day that's like. people would Not like that guy. fabian really is saved by being cute and a rogue#he will still have stans when he's deep in his fishing arc in junior year he's the manic pixie dream bf#anyways uh. things to do! stuff to get done. sleep first tho. have a good night lads#I have not caught new nsbu yet! seems I mostly catch them like two to three days late nowadays.#so please uhh. don't reply on my posts with nsbu spoilers? we are all excited and having fun but that's rude#ok thank u. signing off for the day have a good night#!!
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time flies when you're feeling loved. happy birthday, bandee! [x]
#my art#my comics#bandana waddle dee#waddle dee#king dedede#magolor#kirby#meta knight#starstruck dee#the gang's all back to celebrate his birthday again. as he deserves!!! everybody into the apple pie coma cuddle pile#great way to spend a day tbh!!!#anyway.... i'm still unnormal about him if you're wondering. i know there are many other birthdays today but...#that's my little guy of all time. i just want the world for him...#spare him a thought today! 💖#oh also 'wakeday' (on the chalkboard) is just my in-universe word for waddle dees annual event#they aren't “birthed” so birthday is just not the word they would use!#also most waddle dees probably don't get an individual celebration like this... more like a community event?#but bandee is Very Special to me in my heart so i'm giving him special in-universe privileges too#he should get to know how much he is loved. because it's so much. it's so so much.
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#selfie bee#good evening friends!! how are you doing! C:#I'm very very sleepy I got a new ikea office chair and I build it all myself#I think it went okay! I don't think I pulled the back screw tight enough and now the back is a bit loose#I can probably fix it but I can also ignore it for the next 18 years#thats how long the old chair held up!! in germany it could now drink vodka and drive a car!!#not at the same time that is illegal! not at the same time!! (❁´▽`❁)*✲゚*#but the day is not over yet my uncle asked me for a big art quest and I do not want to disappoint#he wants a muppet tattoo and asked me to draw it#my uncle has started to get tattoos a few months ago#as far as I know he has now gotten 3 note clefs 3 stars a flower and multiple birds#he also started getting piercings but so far I managed not to know exactly where#I think tattoos are super cool (´。・v・。`) I wish I had a good idea for a tattoo but the last time I was very sure about getting a tattoo#it was heath ledgers face as the joker#at that point I was 12 and would not see the actual movie for two more years#a muppet tattoo is a way better idea!! he asked for the count van count! that is also one of my top 3 muppets ₍՞◌′ᵕ‵ू◌₎♡#I always thought I knew a lot about muppet lore but since I started looking up muppet pictures I think there are still a lot of secrets#can the muppets from the Sesame Street actually leave the Sesame Street?#I think Kermit is both on the Muppet Show and on Sesame Street but he is also like the boss muppet#he might have special abilities#I hope you're having a good day friends!! C:#I think I'll post a Sherlock comic later this week#miss you!! ♥♥♥
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Zelda goes mushroom girl
#tloz#a link to the past#zelda#link#my art#I was happy with that first one but for some reason decided it still needed a companion piece so I spent way too long on that second one...#I don't think there was any time during the progress where I was happy with it but hfduhdfu at least I got to Attempt drawing moss hell yea#I also at some point sat in Pyu's art stream and said I enjoy drawing legs As I was being murdered by the infamously impossibe (imo) squat.#it's ok I had fun !! but I need to learn how to let doodles be doodles or I'll never finish stuff at this rate dfsuhfd#if everything in my tloz tag looks like it was drawn by different people uuuh 2023 was art crisis year ngl......#I'm falling back into my old ways rn though#anyway I think about these two a lot I think they're both stone faced and awkward ppl in different ways but they try rly hard to be friends#like I like to think it starts out so incredibly awkward and a bit sad bc they keep stepping over each other's toes accidentally the harder#they try but idk they find comfy middle ground idk in my brain they have a very interesting friendship I wanna get around to drawing it#in a proper way that might make sense....#if I don't write 200 tags I will die maybe it's bc I grew up on dA or smth#and yes I know how to find 1 (one) type of mushroom /I/ am not mushroom girl unfortunately smh
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Batter jumpscare.
We buying a new computer with this one🗣️🗣️🗣️🔥🔥🔥
#And then he crawl out of the screen#just spray him with water maybe he'll get back inside#maybe#I don't know how to draw hands or hat ughhhhhhhhhh#off the batter#off batter#off the game#off game#off mortis ghost#the player#off the player#y/n x canon#y/n x character#y/n#yandere
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Who put these kids here?
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#lan sizhui#jin ling#jin chan#lan wangji#wei wuxian#ouyang zizhen#nameless red disciple#Congrats Jin Chan on your second and likely final appearance in this comic series.#Him turning into a yellow lump in the final panel is shorthand for 'I gave up. drawing is hard. Lump mode activated.'#Or - maybe they turned him around last minute to hide the evidence. It's up to reader interpretation!#I did skip a lot to get here but it is all in the effort of hitting key points and not dragging this season on.#Wen Ning lovers don't worry. He'll be back soon.#I do love how LZH turns to violence and joins in on kicking jin chan alongside the others.#Even more so when you remember they are all tied up the entire time.#Just...What a scene to walk in on as an outsider. And then to not fully comment on.#To be honest: That's kind of how it goes with teens. They know you know. You know they know you know. We won't unpack that.#It's been ages since we saw all the juniors together! They are as silly as ever B*)#I split this comic into two! So there are two comics left of the season!
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do skully have pokemon?
Pumpkaboo is the obvious one, but y'know, sometimes the obvious one is the right one! (we'll say SUPER SIZE Pumpkaboo, just for fun. big pumpkin for big skeleton boy.) and another person actually also suggested Greavard, which I somehow hadn't considered, but feels so perfect that I feel like I should have. dangit.
(they can also have little Nightmare Suit costumes :D)
#art#twisted wonderland#pokemon#poketwst#twisted wonderland spoilers#lost in the book with nightmare before christmas#hajimari no halloween#(sorry for leaving anon off for a while! i've gotten a rash of spam and i'm gonna wait it out a couple days before turning it back on)#also apologies for the rest of this not really being pokemon related#i don't have anything right now for part 4 of the event so i'm gonna use this space to go off about it#because. oh man.#a sad lack of the scullsman but a FEAST of everyone else#gotta love malleus and leona uniting in the common goal of hunting trey down for trying to game their whiny pettiness#(trey doesn't know what to do with someone he can't easily distract with cake)#also further confirmation that malleus WILL kill a small child and leona WILL point and laugh the whole time#also sebek's plans revolving around what he knows he's good at: screaming extremely loudly and hoisting nerds#and let us not forget what i consider to be the crowning jewel#which is jamil figuring out IMMEDIATELY where scully has taken his prisoners#only for everyone else to just. literally refuse to do anything about it.#jamil just standing there and going 'WE KNOW WHERE THEY ARE! WE CAN JUST! GO GET THEM!!!! WHYYY AREN'T WE GOING'#visibly losing his entire mind and it's beautiful#top 10 twst event moments honestly#also some delightful character consistency from jade being all#'actually my dicking around is a sign of my immense trust in your abilities to get things done :)'#'but also consider: there are currently two housewardens chasing a child'#'alternately angrily screaming poetry and begging them not to sue'#'and if you will pardon my city of flowers...there is no fucking way i'm missing that'#lock shock and barrel did not sign up for this. how did these idiots turn out to be somehow weirder than the three of them.#twisted wonderland must be a frightening place indeed
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IS THAT BABY MAGNUS?!? wait i looked at the tags it is him. Little baby brother figure who is going to end up being at least one head taller than OP <3
based on this post
honestly. a head taller is being optimistic. and as such optimus refuses to acknowledge any other possibility thank you very much <3
anyway baby magnus accepted daily cuddles on the condition he got to set the amount of time they lasted for and he had a "get out of air jail free" card per week. optimus finds these acceptable and makes sure to always respect and follow the baby's boundaries to the letter.
and he very carefully doesn't say anything when magnus starts seeking him out on his own whenever the day starts to end and they haven't hugged yet. and he definitely doesn't mention the fact he hasn't used any of his "get out free" cards in months.
neither of them notice the rapidly shrinking gap between the floor and magnus' feet until the day optimus goes to pull him up and they're still brushing the ground. it's hard to say who's more devastated about this 😔(it's OP ofc it's OP it's not even close-)
bonus:
#hey i got an ask#Anonymous#transformers#transformers one#optimus prime#ultra magnus#i have. an insane backstory for this 'au'. but i don't know how to post about it.#i'll get back to it later lmao#my art
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Imagine sheep (idk lol) y/n dragon meeting longan I bet longan would be wondering "how come the dragon kind has been reduced into this... so cute and floofy?!!"
I do a whole bunch of rambling in the tags for this one ^^u But! Dragon y/n would ask them so many questions about the time when dragons were common!
#I home you don't mind I combined these three#because I dont know that much about the other dragons ^^u#I've been debating getting cr to learn the story or just watch it and i haven't chosen yet so I uhhhh have been putting off drawing the#other dragons. sorry ^^u#also ananas is kinda overwhelming to draw. hes got alot going on but I'll figure it out! ^^#eventually#Anyway! about dragon y/n and longan dragon! i think they would have a mkre mentorship type relationship!#dragon y/n is verry much not young but has been around cookies for their whole life. they were raised by a family line of shepherds that has#long since died out but the bell on their neck is from them!#so they dont really know alot of “dragon” things.#i think Longan would feel like its necessary to teach them how to be a dragon and not behave like a cookie so much#yaknow because of their whole “bringing back the age of dragons” thing#although this is only from my limited knowledge on Longan sooo feel free to correct me or give your thoughts!#dreamydraws#cookie run kingdom x reader#cookie run x reader#also i dont think they would mind dragon y/n being fluffy but they wouldn't like how much of a pacifist y/n is
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I have achieved the asking of the date and now my Drifter will suffer. Like we gotta believe that our drifters have little to no social skills. It's amazing how this happened.
#gruvu's art#warframe#warframe 1999#I still gotta get that kiss tho I don't know how to get it#And a friend gifted me the gemini skin and I've been messing with listening to his voice lines#warframe drifter#tsun#Tsun: Honestly I didn't think I would get this far#Arthur: It's 1 am go back to sleep#Arthur nightingale#warframe arthur
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