#and i don’t think i AM trans but like… genderfluid maybe??

[fingertipsmp3]

.

[i-miss-breathing]

They should make bras or binders that make it look like you have pecs. That should be a thing. Not in a gag gift way though, like in one of those rubber/silicone fake muscly torso ways. But with less of a chance of overheating in it and just the pecs. And realistic. Why doesn’t that exist yet??? I just looked online and couldn’t find what I’m thinking of. They have ones that go under shirts but what if someone wants to wear mesh?? And the only one I could find on Amazon that’s remotely what I’m looking for doesn’t even have any reviews, probably because the picture makes it look weird and it’s still $115. Should I figure out how to make it??? I want to but how would I even start???

[crazylittlejester]

I love to think that Hylia gives the oldest daughters in her bloodline her powers/blessings, and ONLY her oldest daughter

What I mean by this is: Imagine a queen has two daughters, one a year or two older than the other, and everything starts falling apart but the oldest daughter just DOESN’T have the Hylia given powers and she can’t unlock them no matter how hard she tries. But then the younger daughter tries just for the hell of it because they’re all so desperate, and it WORKS. And everyone is so confused, did Hylia make a mistake?? But then years later down the line the oldest ‘daughter’ comes out as trans and realizes Hylia didn’t give HIM powers because Hylia only gives it to her DAUGHTERS. He and his little sister laugh about it for ages, and he’s not mad at all that he’ll never get to rule the kingdom because he’s a man, he stands by his little sister’s side and defends her with his life (he’s that era’s Link)

On the flip side: Imagine a young Zelda, like nine years old, terrified because she can’t do this, she can’t go up against this great evil, nothing she’s doing is unlocking these powers no matter how hard she tries, and she runs to her older brother for comfort. The castle is attacked and he rushes to protect his little sister just for Hylia’s powers to flare to life and he realizes “Oh- Maybe I don’t just feel like a girl- Maybe I AM one?” and SHE saves Hyrule, and her little sister from the pressure the kingdom had been putting on her to use a power never given to her

and Lullaby/OOT Zelda’s powers only work SOMETIMES because they’re genderfluid and it’s irritating by very validating

Anyways I just think it’d be funny if Hylia was like “I know ur transgender” before they do and takes or gives magic accordingly alskdkdkdl. Hylia supports trans rights

im gonna write a fic about this one day and make my own link and zelda istg

[lifenconcepts]

Me figuring out my sexuality/gender identity be like:

Hey, I kinda like boys and girls.. so I’m bisexual, yeah?

yooo actually nonbinary people and trans folks exist, so I’m pansexual because I honestly don’t really care for their identity as long as they are lovely to hang out with and consenting ya know.

what if I’m trans?

wait no, nonbinary.

am I gay?

nope still pan

hell - genderfluid it is. Can’t feel a specific one always fits me.

maybe boyflux?

mmmmm nah genderfluid.

okay so I’m genderfluid and pansexual, yep! That’s me alright!!

cuz I don’t feel any gender really fits me plus don’t exactly care for peoples gender or whatever as long as they’re chill.

oh wait no I am nonbinary and pan.

wait wait.. no….. agender?

holy shit I’m agender

okay and pan.

..

yep I’m pan.

“I don’t like anyone lol” ^ NO WAYYYY I AM AROACE LIKE NO SEX NO ROMANCE THAT MAKES SONMUCH MORE SENSE THIS IS LITTERALLY SO ACCURATE!?!

wait why am I suddenly not aromatic

okay I am aromantic now yeah but why is sexual media kinda cool

WAIT NO ITS ABSOLUTELT DISGUSTING NONO

nah it’s cool nvm

okay I think I’m gonna throw up

Eh were chill

Ew I can’t with people

okay I want to cuddle someone and idc if its platonic

no it must be platonic

no if you touch me I’ll shrivel up and turn into a pile of bones

okay honestly romance is underrated

Overrated* what do you mean “aroaceflux”

OH. MY. FKCUCFKSNCCJJOH OKAY THIS MAKES SO MUCH MORE SENSE NOW.

[ckret2]

hey ^^ I love your bill goldilocks cipher, and I was wondering why he possesses a female-presenting body. I am a huge fan of your art btw so don’t take this the wrong way, I just would love to know how you designed him!

The short answer: because he's canonically referred to with he/him pronouns.

The long answer: if you meet somebody who, at a first glance, appears to be anatomically female, and everyone refers to this person with he/him pronouns, you don't immediately know what's going on.

Maybe he's a trans man who's comfortable with his body the way it is as long as everyone around him still treats him as a man. Maybe she's a trans woman with really transphobic acquaintances. Maybe he's nonbinary, maybe he's genderfluid, maybe he's a drag queen who's dressed up for an event but not currently in character, maybe he's a he/him lesbian—you don't know, and it likely isn't your business.

There's only one thing you do know: whatever's going on here, it probably ain't cishet. This person has something going on that does not fit the gender binary. All you can say about him is that he's queer.

Bill's gender is triangle. This simply does not fit within humanity's popular ideas about the male-female binary. Whatever his sexual orientation is, it is not restricted to "only females/only males (as humanity defines femaleness/maleness)"—and so he can't possibly be heterosexual in a manner readily recognizable to human beings. Amongst Bill's own species, maybe he was the most cishet guy you've ever met, I haven't decided; but if you stick Bill amongst humans, regardless of how he sees himself, he'll look queer to us.

On top of that: stick Bill in a human body, and there's a disconnect between his self-identity and the shape he's wearing. Strangers will see him as something he's not: human. He feels trapped in a wrong-shaped form amongst people who think this is normal and what he feels he should be is strange—and if he ever explains that psychological weight of feeling wrong-shaped, the humans most likely to go "I think I get it" are the trans folks who know what dysphoria feels like.

I don't think Bill cares what pronouns humans give him; I think he's called "he/him" either because his human victims decided he sounds male-ish, or else because he consciously decided to take advantage of sexism by presenting himself as male to seem more authoritative. And I don't think Bill cares about the anatomy of the human body he's in; he could have been given any variety of genitalia, secondary sex characteristics, hormone balances, body fat distributions, etc., and he would have been equally uncomfortable in any because they're not a triangle. It makes no difference to him.

But it does something to you (you, The Readers In General): it makes you wonder about his relationship with his body.

Because we're speaking English on the Internet in the 21st century, you and I are participating in a culture that sees having both a vagina and he/him pronouns as Not The Default. It makes Bill look genderqueer-in-a-human-way, and that makes it easier to slide readers over to seeing him as genderqueer-in-a-nonhuman-way. It makes you think about queerness, about dysphoria, about nonbinary folks who defy the expected correlations between pronouns and anatomy without changing their bodies to make them "match."

This is the second or third time somebody's asked me why I put Bill in a female-presenting body. If I'd done the opposite, nobody would have ever asked me why I put Bill in a male-presenting body. Because that's "normal." And I want you to ask questions! I want you to think about Bill's self-image, his internal landscape, the gulf between who he is mentally and what he is physically.

Before I ever directly draw attention to queer topics, I can get folks primed to think about them and to understand that his body doesn't accurately represent his identity just by slapping a pair of boobs on him.

So I slapped a pair of boobs on him.

[kosmicdream]

Please don’t think of me as a male artist.

..is what i used to feel, for many years, even when I finally came out as trans. In a way, its one of the factors that kept me from pursuing HRT (which im so glad i finally did.) After only one year, my feeling on this hasn’t evaporated completely but i suppose I kind of don’t care anymore about how I am interpreted, as a person/artist, ect.. It isn’t something i can be in control of anyway, which upsets me less than it used to.

Sometimes in the past, the way i write characters has often been analyzed by the gender I am, or appear to be - that my male characters were written like how a woman writes men (too emotional/vulnerable, ect) , or how my female characters are written thoughtlessly- like how a man would. (too horny, stupid, violent, ect.) Its not a new way to analyze a story but I can’t say that it doesn’t annoy me. It could still be true that my characters/writing could fall into sexist/problematic archetypes, but gendering my work based on the way my characters act always reminds me of the “you draw like a girl/boy” comments, which used to be more frequent when i was a teen.. But the idea that boys = angular, good at cars! Or something and girls are, i dunno, gonna draw sexy anime men or something. Even as a teenager, i hated this idea that my art was “girl art.” Truthfully, i always viewed my art and myself as an artist as genderfluid, maybe even a type of drag performance, where i can explore any gender and not be limited by my body, it was my escape from that. Which naturally, it became my place to explore gender presentation and eventually helped me “crack my egg” of realizing i was a trans man.

I do think its important to reflect or regard my work as the art made by a trans man, or transmasculine person. I feel more and more just like “just a dude” these days. I am also a gay man. I think those things are important to my work. I think that the analysis of my work in regards to my identity as a person is important to reflect on. I also think the steps I took to get there were important, that transformation and my continued exploration of my older selves and more “label-less” self in the art i make. That’s a private space for me, that I happen to share with the world too. I feel the audience is part of my work too, I welcome it even. I have become part of the audience too and I look at my work as if I’m also a stranger. The older my work gets, the more of it I can study, the more I can see plainly how I got here and also it feels so confusing how it did. I try to study my art to help me find where I want to go to next, a map to guide me. 

In some ways, I feel more lost than I did before, where all my instinct was pushing me was just to grow and explore as much as possible. Now, I don’t have that same type of energy that I used to. Its not a bad thing, its just different. There’s a sense of duty and commitment and a sense of dread of the time it takes to do what I feel compelled to do on this step of my journey. I am trying to focus more on the things I used to think I was incapable of before and I’m trying to remember the things I used to think were so effortless. I can tell my art is sharper but it feels almost like a mimicry of my older selves - at least when I revisit old work to continue its journey past where its been frozen in time. Comics take a long time, after all, it's normal that after a few years - a story might be yours, but it feels like it belongs to the past of you too, maybe more than it does in the present. I like the commitment I have to my comics though, its not a burden to me. The feeling is strange anyway. 

I tend to think that 1-3 years of a project being made, those are the honeymoon years of the relationship. But you hit a wall in 4-5 years and sometimes you’re in denial about it, you try to keep the dreams and feeling alive as you drag it forward, and sometimes the project really reaches its end around 8-10 years and it becomes a type of empty promise to return to it. Not that this is true for every artist, every project, ect. But I think its a natural lifespan for comics that I’ve observed, and it's because it is uncomfortable to face morality and the morality of our own art. Art is this escape, and when it becomes a job - or an uncomfortable mirror into these things about ourselves, about our failures and promises we couldn’t manage to make, the pressures of the audience, the boredom of the task if you have already told yourself the story a thousand times and you have no longer a desire to continue it, ect - its a normal and natural feeling to want to drop it off a cliff. Blow it up, start over fresh - I know the feeling! Its happened many times. But its kind of temporary? Then, it cycles back to nostalgia - and the desire to create and recreate and reform the past to something tangible again.. uh

Sorry, sorry.. I am getting far from the point I started with. Not that any of this makes too much sense, I feel like writing it anyway. It bothers me that the fantasy of art to me, is the ability to dissolve yourself and stop existing, you are the creator creating. You don’t need to be confined by, really anything. It is in “your control” now, and you surrender your own control by falling into the art and letting it “lead you” places. This is a very seductive process and while it might temporarily be fulfilling (even when done for a lifetime) cannot really.. What.. completely fill the void of whatever you’re chasing down there? Its nice though. At least, when I think about when i first started drawing comics, it was to draw Vash the Stampede (from the original 98 anime series, i hate the new one. We’re not talking about there here) coming out of my television after a thunderstorm and he had to just live in my house now. It was the closest thing I could do to actually manifesting that as reality, of making this amazing anime husband come to life to just like live with me now and be my boyfriend. In a lot of ways I don’t see my pursuit of writing ocs, specifically male ones, really much different from this same desire of like “i can just make my perfect boyfriend!” born out of the loneliness I felt in my heart, and the fear that there is no boyfriend out there for me so i need to frankenstein my own - and this boyfriend will be poifect in every way. Or like, crafting the perfect “relationship” in replace the lack of one, or just the fantasy of watching very abstract extremes come to life in various puppets i crafted, beating the shit out of each other for entertainment. But to subject all these.. Abstract Internal conflicts as simply like a “boy author thing” or “girl author thing” is like.. Tiring. Are we really not past that? (Of course not.) 

Like there’s some hidden truth to the way someone might write/draw, the way that “makes sense” in retrospect once the identity of the author is analyzed and discovered.. How can you make sense of the self, let alone the other .. and In a way that’s permanent? And gendered? Does art now have an inherent sex characteristic? But I cannot deny that I do want my art to look and feel like part of who I am, what I have chosen to sexually identify as - a transgender, a man, a faggot. I DO identify as a sexual deviant, but that is hilarious because I have been single for so long at this point I can’t even remember in a tangible way what that felt like and I question if I ever felt it or experienced it “for realsies” because of the experiences I have had or havent didn’t feel very fulfilling or romantic, despite that being something I desire so much - and so I feel like a failure. And to create art just based on the fantasy of desire rather than the lived reality, can it even really display what that would actually be like. So its embarrassing, right? 

I have worked on my art a lot and I have often thought, or come to the conclusion (true or not) that my singleness is the result of my pursuit and dedication to art - which is the pursuit of self isolation and protection from harm. From influence, from acknowledging that life can exist and someday end. And when you work on projects for years and years, the pride/shame dichotomy only gets more.. Weird. It gets weird, guys! It always was weird, but.. I just think about so many my heroes, my art inspirations, working decades on their art.. I follow in their footsteps too and it feels scarier and lonelier than I expected it to be. And the more and more I realized that as a reality, as my 20s faded away, the more I kept walking. I wasn’t gonna stop now, even if I could, I don’t want to and its not hard to do other things too. I have a slower pace than I used to (thank god) and gets slower but I’m still moving. 

I don’t post or write my little art journals as much as I used to. Mostly cause I don’t really have anything good to say and it kinda feels embarrassing to post them too LOL. But.. whatever!! Its been a weird four months of me being off work and I’m about to go back to being a normal working person again.. But its like, its weird to tell people about your art when they ask about what you do. Its like “oh yeah, i draw webcomics” and they wont get it, you’ll say - “yeah its 8,000 pages long” and they’ll say, “thats a lot!” and it is. They’re very nice about it, but there’s a lack of satisfaction there with what that means. I don’t expect it, that’d be dumb as hell. Its nice to take a break from it too, to discover other sides of myself I never let shine because i stayed indoors for a decade, but its a weird feeling too. Like, what will it mean in the end? I don’t really know. 

I don’t think I need “success” to feel like this was worth it, its not like a trophy is gonna come in the mail for the good workTM I’ve done - there is no closure to the work I make even when a story finishes. I have to keep going regardless of that, and its strange to know it won’t ever feel done. But I am so thirsty for that temporary itch to be scratched, it keeps me working every day for the “maybe” of what that might feel like. Kinda silly, really. Is it my “male” pride that demands recognition? Would respect be given more freely if I had “remained” to be perceived as a woman, for subverting the expectations for what a woman can/can’t write? (lol) Is my value as a person determined by that sort of thing in my art? I don’t think of my pride as gendered, but I know its there and I know because of who I say I am, my pride will be gendered by others. I think when I was a woman, that pissed me off more than now because.. Well.. I wasn’t even living as the way i wanted to. I still don’t really live as the way I want to, the way I want to be perceived, but even being on HRT for a little more than 1 year, without much else lifestyle changes, I feel a little more at peace not mattering what others will take away from me or what i write about. I have a lot of my own expectations for myself and what i write about and that concerns me far more. 

I don’t really know how else to end this, I’m going to eat chocolate now. Oh, to answer your question (?) if you might have this one: can I think of you as a male artist, kosmic? sure. I am one after all.

[honkshoo-zzz]

How I see the Mercs within the LBGTQ+ Community

cause i keep seeing people posting things and EVERYONE KEEPS GETTING IT WRONG!! /j who cares i jus wanna make a funky list too

Scout: Def Bisexual, Trans ftm (can take or leave)

Probably has a preference for women

Probably doesn’t realize he likes men until he works with them 24/7 and all of his coworkers are hunky n sweaty and maybe a lil flirty

If trans, used Sex Bom tattoo to cover top surgery scars. Even though it’s definitely just worse than just having ts scars lmao

Soldier: Bisexual and Poly

I just love him dating Zhanna and Demo honestly

Fuck it, other mercs too, if they wanted

Tbh I also fuck with aro/ace vibes for him, he’s just kinda around for a good time with the homies in my mind. Both is good

I do see his preference being fairly equal though. Too busy thinking about his love for the US to think too much about tiddies/ass/etc.

Pyro: Def Ace, and either Aro or Lesbian in my mind. Also Nonbinary.

Either gender-fluid or just straight-up no gender enby. no in-between in my eyes.

I’m mostly all for Aro/Ace Pyro but I saw some Pyro x Ms. Pauling art and. love that. ugh, decisions…

Feel like they use whatever pronouns. Don’t gaf, will never gaf

Also no sex cause the suit just doesn’t come off. Also too busy setting shit on fire to care. More important shit to do.

Demoman: Pansexual and Poly

Again, dating Soldier who is also dating Zhanna

He’s also in a longterm relationship with Eyelander. Don’t ask too many questions about how that works though. But they are.

Also doesn’t have a gender-preference (obviously, he’s married to a sword). Semi-opportunistic in that sense, I guess (again he’s married to a sword. how many times do i gotta—)

Heavy: Bisexual, preference for Men

Idk man but Heavy and Medic have been married for a long time in my eyes

Also I feel like he participated in his sisters’ longing to “see another man” while living in Russia, had a similar reaction to meeting Medic upon taking the Merc job as Zhanna meeting Scout/Soldier

(For those who have yet to read the comics, that reaction basically just being: “you are man. I am horny. let’s bang.” and Medic would just be like o///o “aight” I think)

Biggest trans supporter tho, idk why but it just makes sense he would be the first to punch the teeth out a transphobe. Defends other mercs when confronted about gender shit 100%

Engineer: Bisexual, preferring Women; ftm Trans

The more top surgery art I see of him, the more I fall in love with trans Engie. It’s basically canon to me now. You can take this from my cold, dead hands.

Idk not much else to say. He’s a switch, though, if that adds much of anything HXSKFJEJX

No bottom surgery in my mind, either. Just makes his own straps n shit, cause he can (one of his 11 PhDs was in sex, actually, did you know?)

Medic: Gay, ftm Trans (again, can take or leave)

The most bottom-gay I’ve ever seen, personally (idk how else to phrase it, forgive me)

Again, I feel like he’s been married to Heavy for a long time

If trans, did his own top and bottom surgery, probably at the same time, cause he knew he could and he’s fucking insane (scars are a little wild as a result but he wears them with pride)

Sniper: Gay. das it HFSKFJEK

Gay, but the type of guy where you’d never know til his fuckin boyfriend walks out and kisses him or sum

Also he’s exclusively a top in my mind. Idk why but I feel like he’s got control issues HHEEKLEDP

Again, not super out-spoken about his sexuality, but *will* go out of his way to stab a homophobe. Not kill them from a distance, specifically stab. Shit’s more personal that way (is that too morbid? sorry)

Spy: Bisexual, Genderfluid

Another bottom, but will top if needed (like with most women, if he somehow gets with *another* bottom, etc.)

He’s also a whore. A slut, even. Good for him.

OH AND GENDERFLUID omg. Saw some stuff about that recently so it’s new to my pea brain but I like it.

Again, like Sniper, I feel like he wouldn’t really talk about his gender stuff a lot, but would discover this of himself when disguising himself as women and just feeling. Just as comfortable, if not more comfortable as them at times.

Kinda sensitive about it, though, probably. Will stab anyone who mentions it while he’s figuring it out. But gets better upon meeting the mercs and their gay-asses, lmao

“holy shit it’s not that crazy to like to have boobs sometimes” type-beat.

ok i’m done. again feel free to add stuff, fight me (like, as a bro), or whatever. Love talking about it cause I love these lil weirdos. Probably too much. oh well hdkafjejfk

[gently-decaying-flowers]

i love my brother

but i feel like he’s a little black and white when it comes to gender identity- which is bizarre as he’s a trans guy

i’ve changed pronouns/gender identity/sexuality a lot because idk i’m younger and trying to figure out who i am and what feels right- and he calls me the most “inconsistent person he knows”

which kinda sucks

he told me he talked to my mom apparently about how i’d benefit from just calling myself genderfluid and i have two problems with that

1) i’m not out to my mom. i love my mom and she’s so supportive but i don’t want to come out until im sure because i don’t wanna change it up on her all the time. looks like he did that for me tho

2) genderfluid doesn’t feel right to me- at least right now. it’s not my label. i’m nonbinary/genderqueer atm and i don’t wanna change because of how he thinks i should identify

there’s also the added layer that he and his girlfriend are t4t- his partner was nonbinary for a long time and now they use they/she pronouns and identify as a fem nonbinary- WHICH IS SO COOL

but that means both of their gender experiences were a bit more binary- both leaning heavily away from their agab. i think because i still like feminine things (this convo arose last night because i showed him the swimsuit i was gonna get) and im not the more common “nonbinary androgynous” presenting person- or because i don’t lean fully away from more “feminine” things- he doesn’t really understand?

i think in his mind enby is either dressing masc if you’re afab or fem if you’re amab- or the like short hair, baggy clothes, genderless being aesthetic shown in media when it comes to enby people

and all the power to them! they’re valid and amazing as who they are, but when that becomes The Look for nonbinary people it can affect peoples acceptance of enbies who aren’t like that or can’t afford to be because of money, their home life, etc.

all this is sorta to say that you don’t have to listen to what the older queer people around you think you “should be” or what it “sounds like you are” even people who’ve been in the queer community longer have had different experiences than you- and shouldn’t dictate your interpretation of your own identity

also don’t feel bad about being inconsistent!! ever!!! i like telling myself:

maybe it is a phase but it’s not just a phase. it’s the phase i’m in and i deserve to explore it and have it be respected and feel valid, even if it changes

[our-transgender-experiences]

I don’t know if I am trans. I rlly wish I was a boy but I never did that when I was younger? I was very feminine and I still am. I want to identify as transmasc nonbinary but I’m scared I’m faking it. Cuz like it’s kinda fluid and sometimes I think “maybe I don’t feel bad from she/her?” And when I get referred to as a girl, it makes me feel bad. I wish I could be feminine like a fem boy but not a girl and I thought I was nonbinary but now idk. Maybe I am transmasc genderfluid or gender faun but I don’t know and it feels bad. I used to identify as a demigirl then I found demifemme - feeling HALF FEMININE rather than half girl or something- until I switched to nonbinary then no label. I never had dysphoria as a kid, I was very fem and had female friends- still do. Yet I do now. I am really sorry if I am invading ur space or something. I hate being a girl and I don’t like it when people refer to me as a girl. I hate feeling like a girl, I wanna be feminine and wear “girl” clothes while still passing but I rarely pass. I don’t know if I am trans but i think I will try identifying as a boy. I don’t know if I am something else but thanks for having this blog!! :3 if there’s any questioning tip you have, I’d be happy to know!! Tysmmmm x3

- :3 anon

you are NOT invading this space. i dont have that many questioning tips, but you can identify however you feel. give it time and maybe it will sort it self out, thats what happened with me.

[our-transmasculine-experience]

I’m genderfluid but I use the label transmasc as well? Just putting that out there ahdhdjdj but anyways my mum found a book in a book shop called Why Your Kid Thinks They’re Trans and its written by gender specalists. But they mention Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria and that they don’t call transfems by transfems but by ‘trans identifying male’ and vice versa for trans mascs. And my mum is convinced this book isn’t transphobic. I really want to read the book to see what they have to say and show my mum that its transphobic but she says that it’ll start to many arguments since she agrees with some of the points in the book and I’m kind of worried? Like she’s always been supportive, maybe a bit akward at times but overall ok but yeah.

Also I’m a minor and she keeps saying if I get top surgery when I’m in my 20’s that I’ll regret it and keeps trying to find friends of hers that have had chest related surgeries to be like ‘hey look this happened to them for health reasons don’t do it’ so yeah. uhhh sorry for all that

holy shit i am so sorry. i hope your mom realizes that it’s transphobic and comes around.

best of luck, dude.

[my-pjo-stuff]

Hi, so I saw your post asking about whether or not one could identify with the female characters written by Rick Riordan, and I wanted to share my thoughts, but for personal reasons I would rather do so anonymously. I hope you don´t mind. (I will say that I don´t currently identify as female, but I was raised under the expectations of someone who does/is and am continuously pressured into said gender role. I do partly identify as genderfluid but that is very complex and not important here. I hope even if I don’t currently identify as female, you will still read and consider this opinion as valid.)

I personally can very much identify with the female characters Rick writes. Both when I was younger and now. Having started re-reading the HoO series recently I very much for example feel a connection to how Piper is and grows as a character. I can also very much relate to the more prominent female characters in PJO (Annabeth, Rachel, Thalia) in one way or another and am quite fond of them. I do have to say that I also relate and connect with the male characters as well. I don´t personally think the female characters were written in a way that makes them any less relatable than the male characters. Issues with underlying sexist societal expectations that might be visible in RR writing are very much not exclusive to the female characters he writes (it can be found in the way he writes his male characters as well) or exclusive to RRs writing. These issues are found in a huge number of different books, by a multitude of writers and are problems that are hard to avoid if you haven´t done deep unpacking of gender roles and societal expectations, which sadly most perisex, cis people and some trans and intersex people just haven´t done.

I wanted to say something specifically to this part of your post here:

“Like the inherent feeling of living in a world stacked against you? Being forced to pick up the slack of others and do huge amounts of normal aswell as emotional labor? Not being listened to? Feeling abandoned by those around you???? Those are all feelings and issues that women tend to relate to. And Luke honestly does that great IMO. Yet I can't help but notice that this sort of reliability is completely missing from everyone else.”

I just wanted to let you know that this experience is very much not an exclusive experience to women and more maybe comparable to a general experience of marginalised people. I hope I am not bothering you with mentioning that. And I do not mean any negativity by it. Just a little info to keep in mind. (If that was unnecessary as you were already aware of it, I apologise for bringing it up)

To end this in my personal opinion Rick has definitely improved in regard to this in his newer writing and considering these issues are more of a broader societal issue than an individual issue I don´t see it as problematic as someone else might. I will also say that whether or not someone can relate to a character isn´t and very much should not be an indicator of how well the character is written in regard to their gender. The great thing about gender is that there is no “one correct way” for it. This also means that not being able to relate to female/male character even though you are the gender, does not mean it´s badly written in regard to that.

Just in case it is not clear. I do not intend to argue. I just wanted to share my thoughts anonymously.

I mean I'm certainly not really bothered by it, though I do think this is a case of agree to disagree. I mean relatability is always subjective at the end of the day, and I was really just wondering if others felt the same more than wanting to make any statement. I think that Rick's work genuinely doesn't hold up much after PJO and maybe a few smaller side stories. I do think your opinion is valid, though I think you interpreted a few things into my post that weren't there, and I'd like to clarify that.

“Like the inherent feeling of living in a world stacked against you? Being forced to pick up the slack of others and do huge amounts of normal aswell as emotional labor? Not being listened to? Feeling abandoned by those around you???? Those are all feelings and issues that women tend to relate to. And Luke honestly does that great IMO. Yet I can't help but notice that this sort of reliability is completely missing from everyone else.” "I just wanted to let you know that this experience is very much not an exclusive experience to women and more maybe comparable to a general experience of marginalised people. I hope I am not bothering you with mentioning that. And I do not mean any negativity by it. Just a little info to keep in mind"

I do not mean this bad...but I don't really get why you mentioned that? I'm not disagreeing or anything! I do genuinely agree, but I genuinely don't really know why that was brought up? I didn't really say that is was JUST women who relate to that, just that they tend to relate to it. Which was said based on my own experiences and those shared by other girls. The post is about female reliability, and me saying why I personally relate to Luke. I'm not really sure what other minorities also having to deal with that has to do with anything I said.... This is by no means an attack on you! You are completely valid in your opinion, identity and in your statement. But I'd love if you could clarify the correlation between those two topics 😅

I will also say that whether or not someone can relate to a character isn´t and very much should not be an indicator of how well the character is written in regard to their gender. The great thing about gender is that there is no “one correct way” for it. This also means that not being able to relate to female/male character even though you are the gender, does not mean it´s badly written in regard to that.

Again idk I never really wanted to imply that??? Like if it came off as me saying relatability of the characters decides whether the writing is good or not is not what I meant. I was merely expressing my own subjective opinion and asking if others felt the same. Overall I think that this doesn't have that much to do with the OG post???? And like I said I do disagree with a good chunk of it, as I do think that the female characters have much more sexism in their writing as the men. And that it doesn't really matter how society is built, as other authors like Rick who grew up and live in the same society consistently do much better. All I can offer you is for you to keep your opinion, me to keep mine and us to respect each other. I should warn you that you might not like my blog, as our opinions do seem to vary wildly. Thank you for sharing your opinion though! It's always interesting to see other POVs and counterpoints ^^ I'm happy you felt safe enough to do that with me.

[mayonnaise-sock]

Does Kenny ever realize he is some sort of nonbinary (gender fluid, non binary, trans, idk whichever) or does he continue to be a boy magical girl 100%. Also does the rat ever broaden his horizons or does he just stay as ugly on the inside as he is on the outside?

I don’t think that much about kenny’s gender, to me he seems somewhere between a cross dresser and genderfluid, but he doesn’t seem like the sort of person to care about it much? If that makes sense? He just seems super comfortable in his gender, whatever that is, so i think i’ll just leave it up to reader interpretation, because like, maybe i’m totally wrong here, but i feel like it wouldn’t change much if he were to be trans or genderfluid or nb, agender, genderqueer, cis or anything else, because regardless he’s still happy to wear a skirt, still walking around in that parka, etc etc. I just think it’s more fun for kenny’s gender to be up to the readers. Since i doubt it would impact the story all that much.

Butters on the other hand

Kenny being a magical girl has a direct impact on butters gender and i hope i do marjorine justice. I unfortunately am actually a very bad judge of what plots are good and what aren’t, so i could be writing the worst egg cracking ever and i’d have no idea :(

The rat is uhh… at still figurinh the plot out, and i only have so much planned but i don’t really see mevvi getting better. He’s pretty stubborn, like an old person. Which he is, he’s kinda old. Not like dawn-of-time-old, but he’s old. maybe i should make a post on mascot lore.

Tldr: kenny’s gender is up to you, i hope i do marjorine justice, and mevvi sucks for life.

[our-alterous-experience]

so i just recently discovered alterous attraction and it felt right to me. i have so far identified as panromantic demisexual, and i was just curious how you thought that fit in with my current orientation.

i know its totally individualized, i am just curious to hear someone else's thoughts on the matter, since i cant talk to the people in my life abt it right now.

Well!!!! Depends on how you feel. As you said, it’s individualized so I can throw out some interpretations !!

So I came out as pansexual as a child and always thought I was ace. I flirted with calling it panromantic but never committed. Because I’m aromantic, bc i’m aplatonic, I find it fitting to call myself panalterous. Bc while I am still aspec what’s more important than my romance or sex take or whatever is how i feel alterously. That being said, you don’t need a direct “name” to fit in conjunction with all the other labels and identity. While some people are Romantics and others feel they are that way about Platonic ideals; the same applies to being alterous. I think sunfriend is my favorite alterous term I ever heard but that’s more hyper specific terminology than helpful thing.

For me, I’m also trans, i’m also queer, i’m also aspec, im also arospec.

I don’t think it’s productive all the time to go hello im Vexerin from genderfluid butch transmasc transsexual neopronouner pansexual aplatonic aspec aceflux aromantic alterous land.

Because honestly! It’s much easier to say Hello, I’m Vexerin, I’m panalterous, I’m 20, I’m aromantic and aplatonic. (Within, the context of someone asking me what the fuck i am for the first time at least)

Which is not to say I dislike any of the identities I identify with, it has given me so much freedom to accept these many facets and factors of my life. But for strangers and people who don’t really Know everything about you or even your sexualities, I would recommend just verbalizing “the hits”. The pieces that impact you the most/ are most relevant. For me that’s a lot of my A-spec identities. For me it’s important that I tell a new online friend I’m aplatonic. Is it important for you to tell someone you’re alterous? Are you itching to tell someone?

When I first started introducing myself as alterous in new spaces there was eventually questions and sit downs and I explained my experience and point of view. With new people I was explaining myself for the first time. It was remarkable I got to set expectations in my own way in my own relationships. So the default wasn’t automatically the society standard. I mean it was but it was changed, and that changed me. I will have this conversation over and over again. Like the classic saying, you never stop coming out.

So my perspective is, what do you want to introduce yourself with? Do you want to mention you’re alterous? I think it’s okay to, I think it’s also okay not to. Or it could be something you don’t mention when first talking about your sexuality but you make sure to mention it the second time. or maybe you only mention it when it becomes relevant, you feel alterous or you remember an alterous moment and you bring it up.

There are many different ways to try to go about this. Which one is the best for you? Or rather, which would you want to try out first?

[my-castles-crumbling]

Do you believe that people can change?

Do you believe that I’ve changed?

I’ve asked people close to me if I’ve changed in the past few years and they have said “no”. But I I so clearly have.

I used to be 14, afraid to wear tracksuit pants bc ‘they were for boys’, I cried when someone said they were trans (it was a joke, but years later they actually are - this is a huge regret in my life bc I feel so bad for reacting that way bc I was never not for it), and was just so stupid.

Now I am 19, bisexual, genderfluid, and I can’t help but think that maybe that’s not who I’m meant to be. I’ve changed, yes. I have learned so much about the lgbtqia+ community since two of my best friends came out when I was 16 to be more supportive. I’ve changed. I’ve discovered so much about me and am so proud of it too.

But people don’t see that?

I don’t really see that.

I carry the guilt of being a dumb young teenager, why didn’t I wear trackies? Was I afraid to feel like me? I just don’t get it.

Did I maybe push my identity away unconsciously bc I was scared. I never thought about my gender until about a year and a half ago. So there is no way I knew when I was 14 that that’s why I didn’t allow myself to wear certain clothes.

Idk man I’m just so confused.

Hi!

I think you need to cut yourself some slack, hon. You were a child. When I was a child, I thought I was a straight girl and when a girl told me she had a crush on me, I got awkward. I was raised in a very conservative area and I was ignorant. Sounds like you were ignorant, too!

Just like me, you've worked to become educated about yourself and the world, and I think that's amazing!

Take a deep breath and remember how far you've come. Keep working to stay educated and stay supportive. To me, it sounds like you've changed, and I'm proud of you <3

[sciderman]

Hi, this is the gender-confused anon and i just wanted to say thanks for the reply and also, no, the "sexualizing women" part definetly isn't something that's similar to the terf bullshit they spread, it's more of a "do i wanna be a girl, sometimes, or is it me fetishizing lesbian because of my cis man brain?" type of deal. Also i know for centrain i am not a trans woman, as there are days i am completely fine being more masculine (So ig it's more of a genderfluid or nonbinary thing? Perhaps.) but other days i wonder.

shrugs. lesbians are hot. I don’t think it’s only cis men who are of that opinion. you know who also has that opinion? lesbians, I think.

I don’t know what’s going on in your brain but I think as long as you’re careful that no one is getting hurt or insulted then you’re probably okay. just. you know. be respectful of other humans and don’t reduce them to objects of desire and remember that they are Layered People that are just as complex as you are and you’re fine.

maybe endeavour to make some femme friends first. (just friends). (don’t be weird about it). I don’t know you and what’s going on with you, but it feels like this disconnect you’re feeling might be because you don’t have femme friends? it’s very easy to see lesbians as more than a fetish if you talk to a real breathing lesbian who is not just a pretty fantasy on your computer screen. so - do something crazy. talk to your local lesbian. I promise they’re not as scary as you think. (and this is coming from someone who used to be scared of lesbians).

[leonsleftbicep]

Bake Me Back To Eden

Chapter: III

Ao3 Version

word count: 1,378

Tags: Bakery AU, Modern Setting AU, Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Getting Together, Getting to Know Each Other, Vessel/II/III are dating, IV doesn't know them… yet!, Trans II, Nonbinary Vessel, Genderfluid III, They/Them Pronouns for III, It/Its and They/Them Pronouns for Vessel.

Summary: Thea(III) tries their hand at trying to get a date with the quirky bakery owner, Ivy!

Note: i did indeed project onto III a little. this one is a bit more fast paced and rushed, at least to me, i am sorry about that bit. i am trying to get the slower stuff out so i can get into a more interesting part of the story. i am just being overly critical of myself, even though i got it done and believe it is good in my eyes. i am just hoping you guys will also enjoy it as well.

“I'm going out for coffee!!” III calls out through the house, both Vessel and II were taking a nap, one they both needed from being away from each other so long. Thea knew this was their chance to get closer to the bakery owner of ivy sprigs. 

III walks in noticing how quiet it was in the cute little shop. Thea scours the vinyls for anything new, maybe a new album from a band or two.

With no luck they decide to grab a coffee or tea. They were surprised to see Ivy in a tight tee and jeans, apron discarded on the counter as he stretches his arms above his head. a few pops being heard from his back, plus a growl like sigh.

“what a display Ives” III purrs with a big smile. “oh! I uh, I didn’t expect someone to be here” IV chuckles as his face turns red.

“Do you have back problems?” III asks as they lean against the counter “I know a massage therapist who might help?”. “Well these joints aren't as young as they use to be” Ivy says as he rubs at the ache in his neck.

“wait, how old are you? this entire time i thought you were 32 like Lii” iii say surprised and slightly excited for the answer. 

IV just grins “well I am 13 years older than that” IV says as he leans forward on the counter to look into III’s eyes.

III quickly does the math as then gasps at the discovery “that explains a lot” III giggles, the only thoughts going through their head are just how hot that is to them. 

“well you are quite the silver fox, darling” III flirts very obviously, not caring to be subtle. They want IV to know that they want him. 

IV lets out a huff of a laugh “how do your partners feel about you flirting with other people?” IV asks, flirting wasn’t an issue, he just wanted to make sure he wasn’t stepping in on other people's lives. 

III was surprised by the question, they knew II got jealous when it came to IV, vessel always grabbed at Thea’s waist when they flirted with other people. Other than those two instances, they never noticed anything wrong with them flirting.

“They don’t mind, though their both very possessive” III responds as they lean closer to Ivy

“so.. they wouldn’t mind if we went on a date just to test the waters?” Ivy asks as he gazes in Thea’s heavy lidded sea foam colored eyes. 

III just bit their lip and chuckled “they wouldn’t mind” they purred. Thea reached up to brush a strand of hair behind iv’s ear, thinking that this man was absolutely gorgeous. 

The two just gaze at each other for a while, trying to figure out if this is genuinely something they wanted to do together. 

“Tonight, at that shitty bar on the corner. live music, i won't be drinking though. 8 pm” III says quickly, not elaborating anything before kissing IV’s cheek. scurrying away like an excited ferret. “wear something cute, im wearing a skirt” thea calls over their shoulder before exiting the bakery.

Ivy just stood there, beet red as he registers what he was told. He knew he had the time, and the clothes. but being told was the cherry on top.

III runs into the house and squeals, “I got a date!” they say through the house. II looks up at them “with who?” he asks as he continues to braid Vessels' hair. 

“The baker, with the Ivy tattoos” Thea says as they do a bit of a happy dance. “You got a date with Ivy? seriously?” II says with wide eyes, a slight rumble in his voice. 

III nods incredibly excited “I told him to wear something cute, we’re going to the bar” III grins 

“you mean the dingey one with the shitty bands?” Vessel asks. III nods and grins, showing off those pearly whites. 

—

Ivy was on the phone with Elanor “they said to wear something cute, but they are pretty femme so I don't know what that consists of” he says to her, still completely shocked. 

“Come on babes, they obviously want to see your muscles. weren’t they watching you stretch, then they just want you to wear your cute little button up” Elanor giggles over the phone. 

IV finally has the realization “jesus, i am a dumbass” he groans as he slaps his forehead with his hand. “But which one, I have about five different ones that fit with their aesthetic?” IV asks as he walks off to his wardrobe and flips through the selection. 

“You have anything sheer.” Elanor asks in a straight tone. “If so, wear it! they would like to see your tattoos… and tits-” IV cuts her off “Elanor, stop.”

there's a laugh on her end “hon, i'm going to have to go. The girls just got back and we have dinner reservations tonight. so, have fun on your date, and text me if you two shag!” IV yelped “Elanor!” before she ended the call.

IV took a deep breath, scrolled through his music to find the playlist that he played for big occasions and tossed his phone onto his bed, stretched and then started to put an outfit together. 

—

III put together an outfit on the safer side, not wanting to scare IV away immediately. long skirt, slouchy sweater with a fishnet bodysuit. not too crazy. 

thea makes their way to the pub they told Ivy to meet them at. waiting outside as they smile to themself about the whole thing as they play around on their phone. 

III looks up and their jaw drops when they see IV. Ivy, who took some of Elanor’s advice. he was dressed in a sheer filigree button up that had his four top buttons open, and tight dark plaid pants. “Am I dressed up too much?” Ivy asks worriedly as he moves to pull his hair up in a ponytail. 

“Leave it down” 

“What?”

“Leave your hair down, Ivy” III murmurs as they pulls IV’s hands away and gazes into his downturned eyes.

IV took a deep shaky breath as he tries not to lean in and kiss them. III pulled away and smiled “you ready for our date?” they ask as they hold IV’s hand. 

IV nodded eagerly, he already heard the first band announce themself a couple minutes ago. the thought of listening to music with them as they just enjoy each other’s presence. 

III takes IV’s hand and leads him into the bar, they notice the band “Thats Brian, he's been with this band a while.” III smiles. “you know them Thea?'' Ivy asks as he holds their waist. “mhm, he gets his tattoos done by Lii, and also gets his samples from me” III responds as the two of them walk to the bar so they can order drinks. 

They sit and talk as they wait for their drinks, discussing their favorite bands and pastries that they like. 

“you know, i haven’t had a pop tart since i was in the US, but that was before i figured out i cant eat anything with flour.” III pouts as they sip on their cola.

“I could make you some, I know a lot of places don't have options for people like you. Evie has celiacs so we have a very specific area just for gluten free options” Ivy says as he tangles his fingers with Theas. 

III has the look of pure love in their eyes and also the look that they might cry. “Are you going to cry, Thea?” IV asks softly, worried he upset them. 

“Fucking Kiss Me!” they yelp as they lean in, grabbing IV’s face, and connect lips with IV’s. 

Ivy melts as he closes his eyes and lets it happen. III doesn’t pull away until they are having a hard time breathing. When they pull away they stare at each other.

“Do you want to go to my apartment?” Ivy asks softly as his face starts to turn red. 

“Absolutely” III murmurs with a soft smile as they lean forward and kiss IV again. III pulls away “but after we dance” they whisper.