#and i am LOVING sharing this thought process with everyone :3
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safyresky · 2 years ago
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Frostmas Year Ten: Behind the Scenes
Prologue | Y1 | Y2 | Y3 | Y4 | Y5 | Y6 | Y7 | Y8 | Y9 | Y10 | Y11 | Y12
[To Read Frostmas: From the TOP | Year Ten]
---
Boy howdy! It was two years in the making but, at about 30k ish words, year ten is FINALLY finished and I can FINALLY say, out loud, that Jacqueline got fuckin FROZEN!
Lots I wanna share because Year Ten had the MOST edits out of all the years I’ve written so far. I do NOT want to know what Year Eleven will be like. Y10 was like, the HARDEST year to write so far! Let's get GROOVING
The Intro
I actually rewrote the intro after finishing the entire year. It was a weak start, originally, I realized after writing those three BANGERS of final scenes!
the version you SHOULD have read was only completed on the 13th, after being rewritten once the day before.
I almost didn’t write an intro for Year Ten. I actually think, when I started writing it, on Easter Day two and a half years ago lmao, I went right into the beginning of the year.
If I’m remembering correctly, I actually didn’t write the intro until after the All-Staff scene!
Scene 1: Bernard Machine BROKE
what the elf is elf version of what the fuck. v. important note
“We’re really in it now Jacqueline” is absolutely, 100%, the Frostmas version of this meme from The Good Place:
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And oh boy, with Y10 of Frostmas? WE ARE REALLY IN IT NOW, JACQUELINE
OKAY SO one of the reasons I decided to do these BTS things was for all of the memes/references bc I find it FASCINATING that I can read these chapters and recall DISTINCTLY what I was doing/hyper fixating on at the time. Year Ten edition: Quarantine 2020!
First reference: Jacqueline deciding to go to Timmies
I was 100% projecting, a month into quarantine and I had NO IDEA if Tim’s was open and I was craving timbits and my iced capp of choice (which is also Jacqueline’s)
SO I WROTE IT IN
Two months in I saw they were open via drive thrus and I have a car so I got me that ding dang iced capp
HONESTLY, a lot of Canadians don’t actually like Timmies these days. Apparently, they’ve gone down hill. But Imma be real with you folks, ice capps HIT and I have yet to find a place with a similar drink that hides caffeine well enough for me to enjoy!
Stir-Fry: Best way to make a quick dins and get rid of leftovers
Okay, srs note now: thinking about what would drive Bernard to leave, without knowing what the canon relationship between Jack and B-Man is (tho most people HC that they HATE each other and B wouldn’t take Jack’s BS, and I support this) one of the hardest things I’ve done, to date.
like Jacqueline said in the intro, this is Bernard’s home! He takes care of the elves, they’re his fam! Like, everything considering Bernard’s decision is HEARTBREAKING and the only way I could think of that would allow Bernard to fully leave the picture is, well, him basically trading his “exile” for their freedom.
The conversation they have once B-Man has semi-processed grief is once again, me trying to work it all out
apparently a running frostmas theme for things I can’t figure out is to get Berline some food and watch them scheme. Hey, if it works it works ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Scene 2: Jack gets SERVED
fun fact: I added this scene in after writing about half of the chapter! It was reading very bad prior, since I had just summarized what Bernard did.
“you’re not you when you’re hungry” I think about that commercial a lot. Specifically the Betty White version
it’s also a gr8 Jack line, 100%
so thanks to snickers, i guess, for giving me free dialogue (🤫)
I actually really like this scene! I think it’s a v good villainy Jack scene!
Scene 3: All Staff Meeting
I hate all staff meetings. We had one MONTHLY in quarantine and by the time May rolled around, I never wanted to go to one ever again
SO LET’S MAKE THE ELVES GO INTO ONE! at least they got to go in person 😢😢
Idk why I had B-man give a spare set of keys to Quintin? It’s been so long since I wrote that part, and Quintin makes his way to the Valley in the later half of the year ANYWAY. I actually went back and edited the final few scenes to hint that Quintin splits his time
like some kind of divorce settlement
he and elfsburg divorced. he gets the shop every other week 😂😂😂
ALTHOUGH it IS before B-Man knows he’ll be able to relocate everyone, so maybe that was part of the reasoning?? See, this is what happens when you wip something for TWO YEARS. 30k later ur a mess
Also, hate that Quintin is spelt Quintin. Mostly bc spell check hates it. Sorry spell check, BUT THAT’S HOW IT’S SPELT IN TSC1 END CREDITS
Anyway I think Curtis deserves a little credit, as a treat, and I’m SOFT for B-Man being soft with the elves 🥺
especially since he gets really, really, really into the Resort stuff (that’s canon, you saw him in the last movie!)
Quarantine 2020 Reference: “And for now, it’s the new normal”
we’ve all heard it at this point, even B-Man apparently
also, totally forgot that I had established a LOCKDOWN before covid19 did lmao, almost thought it was another quarantine reference
Scene 4: Frost Mansion/Manor
was two scenes, fixed it to be one scene! one of the many, many, many, MANY edits I was doing up until I finally posted the chapter. This year took SOO MUCH EDITING
the Blaise making a room scene was literally just so I could show off that I finally figured out how warlocks worked in CS :D
AND I FINALLY GOT TO MAKE THE SALARIED/HOURLIED JOKE I’VE BEEN DYING TO MAKE FOR YEARS!!
Legates are salaried! That’s a Crystal Springs FACT
anyway I think about how jelly like the magic in tsc series is. do you? i think about it a lot. like, you could chose any kinds of sounds, and you go for slurping? icky
Scene 5: City Square; Scene 6: Meeting with Governor Blaise
This scene. was another one. that got rewritten way too many times. Idk what it is about Y10, but I could NOT get things sounding decent on the first try for like, MOST of the scenes! Except for the last one, lmao. I’ve had that written for a year :)
it was another opportunity for lore drop tbh, i’m shameless
on that note, I’d like to thank Assasin’s Creed: Valhalla for teaching me what a MOOT is, historically speaking! I read it and was like so THAT’S what CS does! Aight, neat!
“Blaise said with a grin, opening his arms” similar to how Jack said. three or four scenes back 🙃🙃 I didn’t even realize the parallel until the third in process read through!
(Scene 7 is the Council Meeting, and not much BTS info exists for it so we skip!)
Scene 8: Ley Lines
MY BIGGEST MOST GINORMOUS THANKS EVER TO @shittyelfwriter​ BECAUSE I WOULD NOT! HAVE COME TO THIS CONCLUSION WITHOUT HER HELP!
She had the brilliant idea of Christmas trees being like beacons? And chatted with me for a good two or three hours one winter evening in 2020 to help me workshop this idea!
there was another idea of the stockings delivering the gifts but it was knocked down lol, if the trees are calling in the gifts then why on earth would they come shooting through the stockings?
besides, stockings are their own spawn points!!! they gotta be filled with STUFFERS like FUZZY SOCKS, AND CANDY, AND CHOCOLATE!!
no idea how I connected everything together afterwards, tho. Maybe that’s why this year took two whole years to write 😲😲
anyway, yeah, no, thank you SO much as usual ana for being your amazing self FILLED with BRILLIANT ideas and letting me pick from your genius!! something something we stan??? is that meme dead yet?
(oh! and if u squint...u can see Winter watching for frozie Jacquie)
Scene 9: The First Check In
Once again, i have Jacqueline noticing that someone looks slightly different to acknowledge changes in the movies! This edition: Curtis’s growth spurt and slightly deeper voice 👀
(the voice bit was shoehorned in very last minute 🤫)
I ALSO started dropping hints about how Curtis gets very into the Resort later on. I mean, I thought he was way too invested when Scott finds him at the Resort! He was not as disgruntled as any of the other elves were. I’m running with the subtext >:)
FUN FACT: this is where I left off when I initially started doing this Frostmas BTS. I had not made it very far. ONWARDS
Scene 10: Everything Moves Fast
My one regret with this chapter is settling on "New Elfsburg" before placing it in a valley. "Elfsburg Valley" is just so...chef's kiss
BOOM! ELLE DROP! I've got plans for Ms Elle come next chapter. You guys probably won't like it, but uh, I will enjoy the reveal immensely >:)
"saying you were part of Health and Safety went a long way with ordinary beings" -> I'd like to thank Doctor Who episode "Partners in Crime" for this one! I watched it a LOT during the two years of writing this chapter took. It was a rough two years and I was taking all the comfort I could get while isolated from my fiance and my family and LITERALLY EVERYONE
Scene 11: Bag Heist
oh my god this scene. this scene is so good for so many reasons
Jacqueline being an ass
Jack being an ass
God tier frozie sibling banter
Jacqueline acting almost EXACTLY like Jack would just to bug him--hammering home the theme of "becoming what you fear most >:)"
Also, it was so much fun to write! It was goddamn hilarious!
"Do your kids really want the flu?" I asked, hands on my hips. "Because a kid sneezed all over the place a few photos ago, and we need to sanitize this asap. Maybe even close it off for the day."
-> More Covid Nuggets lol
"Barry, right? You chased me out of storage the other day! I remember that, that was fun! How's your arm?"
-> Jacqueline is very much causing trouble and I am trying to really really reinforce that lmao. She's on a first name basis with some of the guards!
"Sorry Barry, but I have the high ground now" -> for some reason, my friend sir eng and my fiance got really into quoting that specific phrase re: Star Wars:
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just before my household shifted and we went FULL lockdown, my (now) fiance (then boyfriend) came up for a visit and marathoned Star Wars with our friend Sir Eng while I was working
(I think that's how it went! May have been my other housemate, and then Sir Eng said it to Fiance and it went downhill from there. Idk man. April-Oct 2021 was kind of a blur)
it went downhill from there, haha. It was a popular turn of phrase up until Sir Eng moved out!
FUN FACT: Jacqueline has never seen a Star Wars :)
"That wasn't rhetorical, Jacqueline. Why is it you're holding Santa's bag? Don't you have citrus to freeze? Noses to get all runny?"
"Not until 3," I said, to more laughter.
Thank you based Spongebob for the ABOVE reference :)
Scene 12-14: It's DORMANT
So, my running gag for this year of Frostmas is basically this:
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And it SHOWS in this scene, especially! More on that in a mo!
"The Workshop itself had been designed to be a bit smaller, to be ready in time for toy making. It felt a lot bigger on the inside thanks to some brilliant engineering on Quintin's end"
->this is 100% a dr who/British joke, a la this scene from Phineas and Ferb's Avengers crossover. (starts at about 1:20 in in case the link didn't work the way I hoped it would). It lives rent free in my head for whatEVER reason, especially since I never saw the entire episode!
but also, like, why WOULDN'T they have it be bigger on the inside? They're MAGICAL. SUSPEND THE DISBELIEF! anyway.
""At this point, I don't care how you got it. I'm just glad you got it." Bernard said, gently taking the bag off of my arm."
->and so it begins! B-Man literally does not care, he just wants to get this moving and try his bestest to save cribmas 🥺🥺
"Everything dies eventually. Even us," Bernard pointed out.
"You must be fun at parties," I said, thrown off guard.
they are at their WORST! BMAN IS DEPRESSED AF! JACQUELINE IS FROZEN AF! I AM THRIVING!
And Winter is in her element! She's got very mom energy. I'm hoping to explain why she's quietly lurking in the next chapter, but basically she has the BIG WORRY for both Jacqueline AND Bernard! She knows Jacquie's frozen, as we see in the final scene. she's doing her best to be there but NOT be overbearing
And Bernard is doing her a real big worry, too! Her mom senses are going crazy
(Winter would've been gr8 at being the next Mother Nature. She declined when approached by MN when the Legate Law was put into place. More on that in Into the Shadows!)
"If you keep clenching your jaw like that, you're going to need a night guard" -> You'll never guess who did, in fact, get a night guard around this time (last March)
if you guessed me, you are so correct lmao. again, one of those oh hey! I recall why this went in! What a crazy thing to look back at! anyway it's done wonders for stress headaches, and I'm positive Bernard would benefit from having one lmao
Ah yes. A bit of sillies before we head into the BERNARD DOES DUMB SHIT portion! Little Shop of Horrors was the first production I saw "post" covid. I quite liked it. The puppet for Audrey 2? AMAZING.
Jacqueline's Interlude
I just had to edit the Jacqueline interlude because holy guacamole, were there EVER spelling mistakes GALORE. It's like, did I miss that section ENTIRELY?! DAMN.
Anyway, it's kinda funny, I remember getting to that part and having to take a step back with all of the shit I was about to do--those three BANGERS of end scenes 😍😍--and straight up needing a moment to process it ebcause I couldn;t figure out how it all started
Mostly because Jacqueline was mum on the subject, if you can believe it. Can't blame her in the slightest, lol, but when ur characters get suddenly quiet while you're trying to tell their story? YEAH. IT'S A PROBLEM
SO. TAKE THE STEP BACK, SEE WHERE JACQUIE'S AT, AND THEN FIND A GOOD WAY TO GET ON WITH THE NEXT THREE BANGERS!
This was ALSO a fun spot to shoehorn in some ah, CS government lore >:) Do I know how their system works? YES! Do I know wtf it is? NO! But it seems to work for them so YEAH, ENJOY THE LORE
THE LAST THREE SCENES (14-16)
Looking back at these now have me cackling, I really went BAM! BAM! BAM! with a bat to everyone's knees, huh? Anyway
YEAH. WOW. you know, this whole section was unplanned. Like, the bag failing? Unplanned--kinda just happened as I wrote! Bernard doing the dumb shit? Not planned, but the moment I had the bag low on magic, I went ah. yes. Bernard would 100% do his best to help save it, given everything he's sacrificed and lost so far
And Jacqueline would be MAD about it, given the ENTIRE situation that Frostmas is/has caused and also, the FROZEN THING
My god, tho. I really feel for Bernard, you know? It's just. WOW. after all of that everything, you just really, really, really want, need something to go right. I feel like we've all probably been there before!
But yeah, everyone's really at their lowest low here
And even with their sibling-esque banter, Berline is still not doing so HOT
AND THEN THE KICKER! THE FROZEN-NESS! AH!
I had that final scene written for YEARS. I think since year 8 went up? My GOD. Been biting my tongue for WAY TOO LONG to try and avoid spoilers but boy am I GLAD it's OUT NOW! AH!
This year of Frostmas decked me lmao. WOWIE. Anyway, plz enjoy the Y10 bts! and the MEMES! I'm HOPING this kick starts my ass into figuring out why Y11 isn't quite VIBING rn 🤔🤔🤔
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sharlsworld · 2 months ago
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༘˚⋆𐙚。⋆ horn dog - 𝐂𝐒𝟓𝟓 ⚘
( 𝖼𝖺𝗋𝗅𝗈𝗌 𝗌𝖺𝗂𝗇𝗓 𝗑 𝗐𝗂𝖿𝖾 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 )
( 𝗌𝗎𝗆𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗒 )𝖼𝖺𝗋𝗅𝗈𝗌 𝗌𝖺𝗂𝗇𝗓 𝗂𝗌 𝖺 𝗅𝗈𝗍 𝗈𝖿 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌.𝗁𝖾𝗌 𝖺 𝗌𝗈𝗇,𝗁𝗎𝗌𝖻𝖺𝗇𝖽,𝖿𝖺𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋...𝗁𝗈𝗋𝗇𝗒
𝗇𝗈𝗍𝖾 ✫ originally this was called work wife and it was gonna be about lando and carlos and the reader teasing them but i had a different idea after i thought of one comment 😭 also i’m so sorry for being inactive i just lose motivation when i can’t find the right pictures
🝮
carlossainz55
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carlossainz55 I went golfing with Lando
charles_leclerc Very nice thank you for sharing with the class Carlos
yn yeah and he asked me to pack them lunch & cut the crusts off their sandwiches
⤷ landonorris what can i say? i’m a man who knows what he wants 🤷‍♂️
⤷ yn you cried and locked yourself in the bathroom when a bee landed on your shoulder last week
⤷ landonorris hey. it was a wasp alright
⤷ yn yes yes very manly
carlando y/n is so over this bromance
maxverstappen1 Very much hurt that I wasn’t invited.
⤷ yn the last time we went golfing the club flew out of your hands before you even touched the ball
⤷ maxverstappen1 Why am I catching strays?? 😨
yn cute. the hat, not you guys
⤷ carlossainz55 I love you too baby ❤️
⤷ yn get home now
⤷ carlossainz55 Yes ma’am
⤷ oscarpiastri Walk em like a dog sis walk em like a dog 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
⤷ carlossainz55 Don’t make me block you again
⤷ oscarpiastri Again?
🝮
carlossainz55
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carlossainz55 Date night with my one and only ❤️
georgerussell63 Oh jeez here comes baby #3. Brace yourselves everyone
danielricciardo Okay who let them out for dinner unsupervised?
scuderiaferrari Betting 500$ that it’s gonna be another boy.
⤷ mclaren Get your money in order.
⤷ f1 This is inappropriate behavior. Jk I’m betting on another boy
⤷ carlossainz55 ??
⤷ f1 And if I said twins then what?
⤷ carlossainz55 ???????
landonorris be expecting a pregnancy reveal in about 3 weeks everyone.
⤷ yn well just fuck me then i guess
⤷ carlossainz55 I did?
charles_leclerc Leave that poor girl alone Carlos goodness gracious
pierregasly Lets keep this PG carlos
⤷ carlossainz55 You cannot be talking
⤷ pierregasly You right you right 🐶
alex_albon you dirty dog 😏
⤷ georgerussell63 No. Not the vibes
⤷ alex_albon oh…
alex_albon is anyone else getting hot? 🌶️🥵
⤷ georgerussell63 Just stop trying. It’s getting sad
⤷ alex_albon alright then!
🝮
yn
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yn 💌
landonorris wait a damn minute
georgerussell63 Very confuzzled
pierregasly Teach me your ways Carlos
alex_albon does bro have super sperm??
landonorris your already pregnant??
⤷ yn BEEN 😇 that picture carlos posted was from 4 months ago
⤷ landonorris i feel very betrayed right now
⤷ landonorris THIS IS WHY WE HAVENT BEEN HANGING OUT? 💔💔
⤷ yn well we can hangout now
⤷ landonorris ok i’m coming over
♥︎ by author
lewishamilton Congratulations you two!! I’m so happy for you guys 💙
alexandrasaintmleux Hardest secret to keep 😫 So happy we can finally have our shopping dates back
⤷ carlossainz I’m not. You guys go out everyday
francisca.cgomes cutest ever 🥹🥹 i’m so excited for baby sainz #3 <33
lilymhe Hottest mommy 😉🩷 i love u all
carmenmmundt Congratulations pretty lady I’m so happy for you and your family 🩵
charles_leclerc HAHAHAH I’VE KNOWN SINCE DAY 1 YOURE ALL LOSERS
landonorris CHARLES AND ALEX KNEW ME BEFORE ME?!?!?!? CHARLES IS SUCH A BIG MOUTH THOUGH
5 minutes ago
landonorris i’m turing around right now. i just need a minute to process this.
5 minutes ago
landonorris ok i’ve processed this i’m standing outside open the door
4 minutes ago
🝮
carlossainz55
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carlossainz55 The past week
alex_albon big back big back, carlos ate all the big mac’s 😍🌶️🥵😇
⤷ georgerussell63 Alex please
yn oooh hey fattie 🫶🏽
⤷ carlossainz55 Hello baby 😘❤️
francisca.cgomes baby emilio 🩵🩵
charles_leclerc I think carlos jr jr and emilio want to have another sleepover with leo and uncle charlie 😇
landonorris yum 😋 not the pizza, you 😉
scuderiaferrari Our favorite family ❤️
⤷ yn clearly not
⤷ yn who said that?
alexandrasaintmleux This is the most unaesthetic post I’ve ever seen
⤷ carlossainz55 Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed today
⤷ carlossainz55 Hold on are you saying my wife isn’t aesthetic?? And my son?? How dare you
⤷ alexandrasaintmleux No y/n and emilio are always aesthetic I’m saying you don’t know how to put the right pictures together
⤷ carlossainz55 I don’t want to hear it
lilymhe only here for my girl and the babies
⤷ carlossainz55 You’re girl??
⤷ lilymhe yes MY girl 😂
⤷ charlos4eva carlos is always fighting for his life in the comments
hoeforsainzzz y/n still being salty is so real
all4lando what i would do to be that piece of pizza isn’t okay 😫😫
operationsainz55 i’ve missed lando always being with them 🥹
sharls_leclercussy baby emilio appearance!! now we need baby los
georgerussell63 Emilio did NOT want to hand that flower over
⤷ alex_albon “emy just pretend like your giving me the flower okay?”
⤷ carlossainz55 You two are the BIGGEST haters I know. BIGGEST if yk what I mean 🐽🐽
⤷ georgerussell63 What are you trying to say Carlos?
⤷ carlossainz55 I’m say you guys are fatties, might wanna cut back on the drinks, you girls are getting beer bellies
⤷ georgerussell63 How dare you, you bastard. I do not drink beer.
charles_leclerc Biggie & biggie jr ❤️
🝮
yn
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yn i love you nyc
alexandrasaintmleux We need a girls trip to nyc
⤷ yn omg yes i’m already writing ideas in my notes app
⤷ alexandrasaintmleux Already making a mood board
⤷ carlossainz55 We’ll be back in December everyone
⤷ alexandrasaintmleux we?
⤷ yn as in me and alex?
⤷ carlossainz55 Wow
⤷ charles_leclerc Wow
landonorris me and the boys just got done absolutely demolishing some dino nuggets
⤷ yn that sounds very fun lando thank you for sharing with us
⤷ alex_albon they left you guys at the hotel? 😭
⤷ landonorris no they shipped me and the babies back to monaco to have some “alone time” if yk what i mean
⤷ georgerussell63 The baby doesn’t get hurt?
⤷ maxverstappen1 I don’t think it’s big enough to reach 😂
⤷ carlossainz55 Excuse me? I’ll let you know that I have bruised her cervix many times
⤷ landonorris Carlos sainz are you saying your saying you rough up your wife? 🫢 you dirty dog
⤷ alex_albon oh so he can say it but not me?
⤷ carlossainz55 What can I say she likes it that way
⤷ georgerussell63 You don’t need to be big to bruise someone’s cervix
⤷ carlossainz55 Tell that to her belly bulge
⤷ alex_albon and how would you know that George Russell? 🤨
⤷ georgerussell63 Google ho 🤣
⤷ oscarpiastri who is this DIVA💜
⤷ lewishamilton Wow sometimes I forget your not a middle aged man
⤷ oscarpiastri Like you? 🤣🤣 might be time to hang up the helmet old man💀 and rookie Alonso
⤷ fernandoalo_oficial What he say fuck me for??
⤷ yn idk leave me alone
scuderiaferrari Hope you all are having the best time in NYC ❤️
⤷ mclaren Read the fucking room?
⤷ redbullracing Ooh someone took the lead and don’t know how to act 🙄
⤷ mercedesamgf1 I HATE YOU ALL
⤷ f1 ho is u coo?
🝮
landonorris
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landonorris life as a single mom
BEING A MOM IS A JOB TO GUYS!!
yn oh shut your face
⤷ landonorris can you not yell?? i just put the boys to bed jeez
⤷ yn are you being cereal right now 😐
⤷ landonorris someone didn’t get d down last night
⤷ yn i’m gonna punch you in the throat when i get back to monaco
⤷ landonorris carlos!! control your woman!
⤷ carlossainz55 No thanks she scares me 🥰
⤷ landonorris at least give her some of that d man
⤷ carlossainz55 She’s been gettin it trust
⤷ yn why is our sex life always the topic of conversation??
⤷ carlossainz55 Bitches wish they were us
⤷ landonorris ooh we love a sassy man 💋
⤷ yn what is wrong with you
⤷ landonorris please don’t use that tone with me i’m feeling very sensitive right now
⤷ yn aww is it that time of the month
⤷ landonorris i’m the sweetest girl in town so why are you sooo mean? 💔😞🖤😖
oscarpiastri They always look like they just got back from war after being with you for more then 24 hours
charles_leclerc Let’s pray you don’t have kids until your at least 30
⤷ yn you’re*
⤷ oscarpiastri you’re*
⤷ lewishamilton you’re*
⤷ alexandrasaintmleux you’re*
⤷ landonorris your*
⤷ landonorris fuck i can’t do anything right
⤷ charles_leclerc I GET IT DAMN
⤷ charles_leclerc hahaha lando go back to school
⤷ landonorris you coming with me genius?
⤷ charles_leclerc damn
danielricciardo Now why would they trust you with two kids under 5
⤷ landonorris you’d be surprised with how much they trust me with…that’s right guys i know their dirty secrets 😏🍆🍑
⤷ carlossainz55 I’ll spill all your dirty secrets if you spill any of my dirty secrets
⤷ geogrerussell63 How are you guys getting that font??
⤷ landonorris it’s a secret
🝮
yn
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yn surprise surprise,
mathéo & matthew 🤍 our little miracles
alexandrasaintmleux So much love 🤍 I’m obsessed with them already 🥰🥰
landonorris two more godsons to love 💙
f1 What did I say? Congratulations you two we are all so happy for your family 💙💙
carmenmmundt How precious 🥹🥹
alex_albon so what i’m hearing is carlos DOES have super sperm?
scuderiaferrari Does this mean we get 1000?? 😁😁
⤷ mclaren I was jking I knew it was gonna be a boy
⤷ f1 Hahahaha you have to pay both of us now 😂🫵🏽
francisca.cgomes so much boys 😭🩵🩵 i can’t wait to meet them 🥹
lewishamilton double trouble 💙💙💙 beautiful blessings truly
landonorris 4 is the best number 😏
⤷ yn don’t make me get pregnant again just to make it 5
⤷ landonorris gonna go cry in the bathroom brb
⤷ yn don’t come back ❤️
⤷ landonorris my heart can’t take this anymore
georgerussell63 You poor girl how are you surviving with all these boys??? 😦
⤷ yn i love my clingy boys
charles_leclerc Can’t wait to get them on the track
⤷ carlossainz55 You and me both brother
⤷ estiebestie i’m not okay
danielricciardo Congratulations on expanding your football team 💙
lilymhe milf 4x 😉 in awe of them 🩵
pierregasly Carlos Sainz the man that you are
carlossainz55 I love you and our sons more then life itself baby, I couldn’t imagine doing this with anyone but you ❤️
⤷ landonorris SOMEBODY SEDATE ME
⤷ maxverstappen1 Come on grandpa, let’s get you back to bed
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miserycanary · 8 months ago
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A FIXED HEART IN YOUR HAND ᡣ𐭩 previous ⤶
♡⃛ ‘My Hell For Your Love’ alternative ending
pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley & fem!reader
synopsis: is it done? hopeless love? How Ghost is after the break-up
tags: :3.. 
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Ghost swears he’s going crazy. In his eyes, the walls are dimmer and everything seems… out of place. He seems out of place. Not when you’re not there with him. “Fuck,” he grumbles, tilting his head back on the headboard of the bed you used to share with him. He knows it’s disgusting but he hasn’t had the courage to change the bedsheets since that day, too scared he’d forget how you smell. Ever since you came over for the last time to take your things, he lost everything in the apartment that reminds him of you— that reminds you guys happened. 
It seems like he’s in a worse state than he thought when even Price came up to him, asking him to hang after work shifts. Ghost knew that he was not in the best state and everyone in the base was muttering about it. Seeing as he had nothing more to lose (you were all he had), he agreed. 
The bar was filled with cigar smoke and the smell of cheap liquor. It was bustling with bodies grinding on each other everywhere. He had let himself go but his build still managed to attract stares, often getting hit on by ladies looking for someone to fix their daddy issues. And each time he turns them down until he sees a familiar figure. Like a dog, he chases someone who seems to be you but only to feel a pang of disappointment. 
The night seems to pass quickly. He’s suddenly in bed with the girl who looks like you. He knows it’s wrong to play with her, but he needs you— one way or another. It just ended up with him more frustrated. She wasn’t like you. The way she felt, her look, and her voice. Everything was so different. 
He didn’t even stay the night, unable to process the fact he laid with someone who wasn’t you. Placing some bills on the bedside table, Ghost takes one more look at her sleeping figure that paints a scowl on his face. Even the way she sleeps wasn’t like you at all. The walk back home was exhausting, with a cigar between his lips and a burden in his heart. 
His steps halted when he found himself in the familiar street of your unit. “I’m really going nuts,” he chuckled to himself, peering up to look at your unit that always had its windows open. He was about to risk it all when he heard your laughter and a voice. The sight before him made him lose it. You had a guy over. Someone who doesn’t even look like him! Ghost snaps back when he realizes he let go of his cigar. Looking down at the still burning light, he contemplated. Was it done? Were you gone from him forever? No, right? It’s a one-night stand, convinces himself.
It wasn’t a one-night stand, he realizes. Holding the wedding invitation in his hand 2 years after that. The words printed on the dedication had his stomach churning. 
‘To my old friend, Simon,
I invite you to my wedding. Thank you for being with me for many years. You have helped me become who I am today, so I would love if you’ll be there. We promised we’d be with each other during our happiest moment, right? 
All love,
Y/N’
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꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱: the last and final part. Go read the alternative ending! Sorry if it’s rushed!!
dividers by @cafekitsune
Please reblog!! Ask is open!
⟢ taglist is open! Comment if you want to be tagged in the next posts.
check out my other works in the masterlist: ୭!
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yunnimilk · 4 months ago
Note
hey :D if you're accepting requests can you do domtop amab reader with subby amab gojo with them secretly dating? Hcs or a small drabble is fine
If you're alright with it, you can do a satosugu version if ot3's aren't against your rules! If you can't dw you can just write gojo :3 (if you do write satosugu then it's the same as the just gojo one!)
tyty for your time
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⋆.˚ ★ ᝰ.ᐟ ; 1st p. ; AMAB! SUB! BOT! Saturo Gojo x AMAB! DOM! TOP! GN! Reader + 2nd p. SUB! BOT! AMAB! Satosugu x DOM! TOP! AMAB! GN! Reader VERS.
. 𖥔 ݁ ˖ | kinks \ tags ; orgasm denial, brat taming, spanking \ impact play, sex toys ; both parts !
,. 𖥔 ݁ ˖ | two sets of headcanons ; cw : none, I have two versions for this! Satosugu + you vers. and you + gojo only! I am just assuming that you wanted geto and gojo to be sub . AMAB LANGUAGE , reader has gender neutral prns. there will be a nsfw vers and a sfw vers, I should update my rules for ot3 , and hope you have a great day, anon, you are so sweet xoxo
BEWARE OF NSFW UNDER THE CUT !
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Gojo x Reader vers. ;
SFW ;
Dating Gojo was quite the adventure, especially if you're doing it in secret. He pops in your place randomly, awaiting the affection that you give him ,
You two have mini dates in the breakroom, he likes making matching bentos for you both. Caressing your hand while he tells you about his day ,
Sometimes, he's not so subtle about your secret relationship, everyone assumed that you two had a crush on eachother, at the very least. You still kept it a secret notheless, no one needed to be in your business
sometimes he feels bad about not giving you any attention because he's so busy ! So expect to be smothered in kisses after his shift !
Gojo loves having shared showers / baths with you ! It doesn't even need to be sexual, he just feels relaxed with you in a bathtub !
Before you two go to work, you both go to a cafe that isn't really visited by anyone, no one familiar can see you two there so he can flirt and cling onto you all he wants !
You leave little notes in his lunch when you can't hang out with him during it, seeing them melts his heart, so he decided to do the same to you !
Whenever you call him he acts like you're his grandma or a doctor, but he's kind ofna good actor so everyone actually believes him for the most part !
NSFW ;
Behind closed doors it's anything but wholsome, if Gojo decided to act like a little brat, you'd stroke his wet cock and only stop if you felt it twitching which indicated that he was cumming ,
Spanking and fingering him over your lap, giving him a pillow to bite on and moan in. You slap his inner thighs, dangerously getting close to his cock, it leaks of pre-cum as you jerk it off for a second but then rob him of that pleasure !
But he still acts like such a little brat, being condescending on purpose, you slide a vibrating cock ring on his dick, then he sobs from the pleasure, screaming so loudly. The best part is that he can't cum, so he just squirms in your lap while you get harder from the sight ,
You stroke his white hair while his back arches and his body fidgets from the vibrations, Gojo grinding his cock pathetically on your leg. His drool seeping into fabric of the pillow, his mind was too far gone !
Using a little ball gag to block off his whimpers while you abuse his prostate with your cock, his thighs are shaking and his hole is getting more puffy ,
The pink hole looks so adorable trying to take you. When you take it all the way out, you can see it clench around nothing, then when you're about to put the tip in, his hole tries to desperately suck your cock in !
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Satosugu x Reader vers. ;
SFW ;
Geto's more calm and collected than Gojo in the relationship, not to say that he doesn't have the same thought process, I mean, the two boys have been with eachother since highschool. It's nice to have a mix of peaceful and chaotic energy in your life ,
It's best to keep this relationship a secret since Geto is trying to get rid of all non-jujustu sorcerers, which makes him a major enemy to jujustu high, it'd go hellish if anyone found out about this poly dynamic ,
They love to suffocate you with kisses in the morning, no matter how 'ugly' you think the drool dribbling down your cheek looks or the crazy bed-head that you get is, it's the minimal time you all have together before starting the day
Geto actually looks so amazing in the mornings while Gojo looks like a wet cat, the raven haired man has such a princess look while he's sleeping, but when you look at Gojo, he just looks very messy ..
When they both get home, they just want to cuddle with you, not letting you go, even for the bathroom. Probably planned to pounce at you so you wouldn't escape their grasp !
Movie nights! You guys have one at least once a week, watching knockoff Disney movies with popcorn. You lay on Geto's chest while Gojo places his head comfortably between your thighs .
NSFW ;
Imagine you sending nude photos at work, Gojo basically mewling at the sight of your bare stomach and cock while Geto already getting hard, dick straining against his pants ,
When you all get home, they're already fighting to suck your cock, fighting to yank off your underwear, looks like you have to punish them for fighting ~
You make the other one watch while you fuck one of them, not letting him touch himself either, but you make sure that the one that's reciving treatment doesn't get to cum, he doesn't deserve it anyways
Gojo getting on top of Geto to make out with him, you spread both their legs to push the head of your cock inside their velvety hole. Spanking both of their thighs until it turns red, and teasing their holes, they both whine from the minimal pleasure they receive ,
You make sure that they don't get to reach their orgasm, you pull out your fat cock to see their cute holes wink at you, basically leaking for you ♡
You take turns to fuck them, but they cry when they don't get attention from your dick. You have to fuck the brattiness out of them until they're both babbling from the amount of cum covering them and filling them up !
Geto gargling on your cock and Gojo sucking your balls, they look so cute! Hearts in their eyes while they try their best to please you ,
The pleasure bekng so intense that you shoot gallons of cum, the white liquid dribbling down their chins making sure to drink up every last drop !
You make sure to shove buttplugs in their spasming holes so none of your seed can escape, taking care of them by feeding them with your cum !
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kyaroscuro · 1 month ago
Text
All About You
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Maybe it's all about you when your youth is filled with each other's names and your heart has never changed. That's what Juyeon finds out when he falls in love with his best friend.
pairing : bff!juyeon x gn!reader (+bf to ex!sunwoo) genre : fluff, bestfriends to lovers, slow burn, slight angst but happy ending warnings : swearing/cursing, sex jokes, implied sex, mention of burnout, alcohol consumption, heartbreak, pet names (sweetheart, good girl, pretty, baby) notes : it's been a long road but i'm happy to introduce y'all to my baby! i've been (and still am) obsessed with juyeon since the zeneration 2 concert and i guess i've had a lot to write about him... i hope you'll find out the few references i've managed to sneak in! enjoy ✧.* shout out to my dear @winterchimez for proofreading and helping me during the whole writing process, you were a great help <3 words count : 13745
No one ever told you how relationships work. So when you fell in love with your best friend Juyeon at 16, you felt a little helpless. Should he be the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning? Was it wrong to lean on him when he welcomed you into his arms for a movie night? Eventually those feelings faded as you both started dating, and you wondered if it was even true love. Maybe the 16-year-old teenager you were was just attracted to the idea of being close to another soul, mentally and physically.
Maybe yes.
The only thing you know right now at 24, is that the feelings you had for Juyeon back then were nothing compared to the ones you have for Sunwoo today. The attention and love he gives you makes everyone jealous. Even Juyeon himself.
If he wanted to take you out to dinner, you would turn him down because you already had plans with Sunwoo. Arcade, karaoke, late night walks, picnics, fancy restaurants or fast food, you’re always together. Sometimes when you feel like staying in, Juyeon would show up, hoping to watch a movie like the good old days. But he’s met with Sunwoo at the door and doesn’t have the energy to see you being all lovey-dovey.
He knows better than to be a third wheel. As much as he understands the time you spend with your boyfriend, he can’t help but feel jealous and left out. You’re not trying to make him feel that way, you just needed Sunwoo’s presence.
The two of you met in your 3rd year of thesis. He was actually the student under your supervision for his end-of-studies internship. You obviously spent six months seeing each other and working together – in the lab, the library, cafes and even at home. You both grew closer in no time, and that’s only fair given the fact that Sunwoo is a living comedian. You don’t think you would have made it through the whole editing process without his support.
The funniest thing he had ever done was that he was proofreading your work while you did the same for his. Sure enough, you both graduated with the help from one another and a couple of kisses were shared.
From Juyeon’s point of view, those six months felt like an eternity. He had a girlfriend at the time and couldn’t really go out with you. You were both busy for different reasons, but still tried to see each other once a week. But when you did see each other, you always talked about Sunwoo and he talked about his girlfriend. That’s what your lives were made of, but it was a little heartbreaking that you were best friends who only talked about your partners.
“How’s the job hunt going?” He asked at one of your meetings.
“Great actually, I felt like giving up, but I didn’t endure those three years to throw it all away, did I? Sunwoo helped me a lot, he’s my lifesaver.”
Juyeon felt like throwing up, as if his heart had been stepped on the moment he heard those words, and he didn’t know why.
“What about you?” You asked him, cutting his train of thought.
Oh, he knew you were talking about his own job, which he quit a few months ago (more like he’s on a break because he’s burned out). But it’s not like he has to tell you; he doesn’t have the guts to anyway. He thinks you would be sad and angry with him, when all you really want is for him to be happy. And he’s also upset that he’s had to give up on his dream job because it was affecting his health. Thankfully, his boss has been kind enough to give him a chance to rest up for now. Maybe all he needs to keep going is your reassurance?
“We broke up.” He says quietly, looking down at his hands.
“I’m so sorry Juyo, aren’t you too sad?” You say as you reach out to him.
“To be honest, I am.” He admits, looking up at you, a small smile forms on his lips. “It was a mutual agreement, but I feel like I screwed it up. She said I needed to think about my own needs and wants.”
“And what do you want?”
“To spend time with you.” He says straightforwardly.
Your cheeks flushed at his sudden comment. Has he always been so honest?
“I’m free tomorrow if you’re fine with that? Sunwoo is going out with his band.” You say, eager to spend more time with him. “Oh, and Juyo; you should know that I will always make time for you. You’re a big part of my life and I care about you more than anyone else so please do not hesitate to reach out if you need anything. I’m just one call away.”
“I know that but I always seem to bother you.” He says, a little ashamed to think so.
“You don’t. What makes you think that?” You frown at his words, wondering if he actually meant them. “You have no idea how much I look forward to our weekly meetings! It keeps me going during the week, I swear, ask Sunwoo he only hears about you.”
“Oh,” he responded, feeling delighted with your words.
“Yes Juyo, I miss you a lot.” You gasped shyly, suddenly very focused on your hot cup.
“I miss you even more.” He looks for your eyes with a hint of fondness that you don’t notice, even when you raise your head to tell him,
“So tomorrow?”
“Tomorrow,” he smiles, pleased to see you smile back with the same touch of affection.
When you think about it, you don’t understand how it is possible to break up with Lee Juyeon. You didn’t really know the girl he was dating, you never met her, you only saw her face in a picture once. But you do know your best friend, and he’s not the type to break someone’s heart. He would fight for the person he loves, even if it doesn’t work out. Juyeon is love personified. So how can you reject him?
Woo ☼ (3)
Sweetheart I miss you
When are you coming back home
I have a present for you
What kind of present?
Me ;)
OMW
Juyo <3 (1)
Thanks for today, I can’t wait for tomorrow. Pick you up at 10?
Will be pretty and ready!
Always pretty but ready? I’m looking forward to it
As soon as you read his message, your heart began to thump real loud and your cheeks immediately flushed red. Who are you and what have you done to Juyeon? When did he become so flirty? Or maybe he has always been like this and you never cared before. But why do you even care now? 
When you were 16, you remember vividly how he kissed your hand goodbye because he was a gentleman and you were a darling. Everyone at school made fun of you for being so old-fashioned, but little did they know that you liked it. Eventually, when you turned 17, he dropped the act and started kissing your forehead instead. It was a hundred per cent worse. Your cheeks turned pink every time you thought about it and people were calling you out for being highkey on PDA and asking you to spare the singles.
Maybe then he was always this flirty.
It didn’t matter much to you because it was puppy love. The first man you ever loved. Until Sunwoo came into the picture.
“How was your date sweetheart?” You laugh into the kiss he greets you with.
“Pretty good, I think I’m developing feelings, I don’t know, he’s just so sweet and- Ouch Sunwoo!” You yelped, surprised by his sudden, somewhat erotic gesture.
“What?” He giggles innocently.
“You didn’t have to pin me against the wall, did you?” You ask rhetorically, knowing full well what his answer will be.
“I did,” his sparkling eyes turn to onyx, his tongue runs over his lips and his gaze travels up and down your body as he answers.
“Yeah?” You whisper, aroused by his deep voice.
“Yes.”
His plump lips are all over yours in an instant, taking your breath away. To deepen the kiss and emphasise his need to be closer, he grabs your legs so you can wrap them around his waist and welcome him in. Your arms wrap around his neck as you yield, kissing him back with passion and love. He doesn’t let go until you’re both out of breath, and then he kisses you again and again like a madman. Eventually, you’re so lost in the pleasure of his kisses that when you feel him nipping at your neck, you push him away, panting.
“I understand that Juyeon is your best friend,” he says with a heavy voice. “But you can’t joke about dating another man.”
He doesn’t give you a chance to answer as he runs his tongue over your lips before kissing you lazily. You stick out your tongue, waiting for him to resume his kiss. He chuckles at your behaviour but kisses you nonetheless.
“Good girl hm, are you hungry?” He utters with lustful and honey dripping eyes.
“Let’s take this into the bedroom then.” At his promise to take you to heaven, you nod eagerly, excited to see what he has planned for you.
You don’t quite remember what happened after that, too lost in lust and love. You felt the kisses on your forehead and the caresses in your hair before he left the bed.
Suddenly, nothing. All you felt was emptiness.
You turn to check your phone when you yelp in pain because your back hurts. Your man was a beast last night.
Wait.
9:30am?
You hurriedly get out of bed, taking in your dishevelled appearance and the hickeys Sunwoo had the courtesy to leave on your body. You’re ashamed to go out like this, because you know that you have little to no time to cover them up.
More importantly, Juyeon will notice them. It’s not that you cared about exposing your sex life, you have a lot of fun with Sunwoo and he’s the greatest in and out of bed. But for Juyeon to see you in such a vulnerable way? It does something to you and you can’t figure out why.
You never talked about your sex life with Juyeon although you are best friends; you two are kind of secretive. Sure, there were times when you complained that your exes were terrible kissers or that dates were horrible. But when it comes to any form of intimacy, it was out of the books. You both never joked about kinks, never asked about turn-ons. Yet, you shared your very first kiss with Juyeon when you were 16.
It was a bit messy and hilarious because you had no idea what you were doing. You remember how when he dropped you off after school or after a playdate, he had this cute habit of kissing your hand goodbye. It was also at that age when you started going to parties – a party between friends, no alcohol, maybe just some cheap beer that tasted like grass. But that was fun and it was also the time when you were introduced to love, through couples and kisses.
Love has always been a foreign language to you. You know for a fact that love is what your parents share with each other, through physical touch, words of affirmation, acts of service, quality time, gifts but also through struggles.
But you also know that the person you’re closest to doing those things is Juyeon. You both were always cuddling, fighting over movies or places to eat. You both would also cheer, support and reassure each other.
You both would always have each other on your minds, sending texts, calling or buying sweet things. It’s only fair that you thought you were in love with him, isn’t it?
And that faithful night, at your birthday party, he thought it would be a great idea to carry you and run around in circles until he lost his balance and fell with you laying on top of him. You didn’t know what was going through his mind, but you saw flames in his starry eyes, and then he pecked at your lips. He brushed it off by pulling you up and wishing you a happy birthday but your heart was racing and so was his.
“Sorry Ju, I woke up late, I didn’t want to keep you waiting,” you pout as you reached his car, pressing a kiss on his cheek.
“Thank god your prettiness makes up for lost time,” he jokingly hugs you, his hands laying a little low on your waist. “But you have to take responsibility for making me wait.”
“Juyeon! It’s been 5 minutes you can’t blame me for the delay!” You wriggle into his embrace and put your head in the crook of his neck, a little embarrassed but wanting to be close to him.
“I can, and that’s exactly what I’m doing,” he whistles, taking you out of his arms to observe the love bites on your fair skin. “Maybe you’d be on time if you hadn’t had so much fun last night.”
“Y-Yeah, I walked into a trap,” you stammered, speechless.
“The kind of trap you can’t refuse, I bet.”
And he opens the passenger door before giving you his hand to help you get in. You look at his hand and then straight into his eyes to understand where that confidence comes from, but he just smiles and nods.
“Come on, we have much to do before the carriage turns into a pumpkin.” He smiles and fights with the wind to tuck a wild strand of hair behind your ear.
Spending time with Juyeon is one of the things you adore the most in the world. You were so used to spending your days with him when you were teenagers that you almost forgot what it was like. The princess treatment, the cafe dates, the shopping and giving opinions on outfits, the restaurants. Now that you’re all grown up, reliving those moments feels a little bit odd but great. After all, you’re the same people who dance to the music in every corner shop and laugh at every silly move you make.
Going out with Juyeon is also all about treats and gifts. You have this implicit rule that when you’re out and about, you’re encouraged to pay in turns – be it at the restaurants, bars or for desserts. And of course, he pleases you more often than you please him, but you tend to buy more things related to him – matching items or clothes that reflect his style.
“Look at this cute bracelet! We should get it to celebrate our 10 years offriendship,” you beamed, slipping the bracelet around his wrist without a word of protest to see how it looks.
“But it’s paired with a promise ring?” He comments, in case you haven’t noticed and had a change of heart.
“Then we can get the ring in another 10 years,” you giggle and squeeze his hand to reassure him that this is what you want.
Happy with your little joke, you went to the cashier to buy the bracelets. But it sparked something within Juyeon’s heart. He may be slow to understand, but you don’t have to tell him twice. You consider him to be your significant other. That’s what a promise ring means.
After all, you wanted to commit yourself to him for the rest of your life. You’re his best friend and that should be normal. It is normal to stick by each other’s side. But why is his heart missing a beat?
If you ask Juyeon about his relationship with you, he would describe it as “enchanting”. You’re the most important thing to him. Ever since he bumped into you in 3rd grade, you two have been inseparable. But there’s something that’s always bothered him.
In the beginning, he thought it was because you were the only one that he was really close to. He didn’t look at you any differently. But every time you smiled, he felt a twist in his stomach. Then he made it his goal to make you blush and to kiss your hand. It was thrilling to see you all flustered by his own actions.
He grew up and unfortunately that feeling never went away. In the end, he thought that maybe it was just the hormones. A 16-year-old boy needs to get to know his body and its needs. That’s what he did. Eventually the feelings vanished, but the uncomfortable feeling stayed. Even when he was with his ex.
He’s well aware that you are in a relationship with Sunwoo and that the two of you are in love. He’s never been happier for you. After all the people who have taken advantage of you, you deserve someone positive. Someone who will be there for you and will make you feel loved and truly fall in love. Like Sunwoo.
And yet, he doesn’t know why he’s so attracted to you. He needs to explore his feelings. At least to understand them. Even if it costs him.
“How about a drink?” He asks as the sun is about to go down.
“No, you need to drive safely.” You flinched, clearly against the idea of losing him in such a stupid way.
“What about my place? You know I have this amazing balcony overlooking the sea.” He offers in return with a smirk.
“Deal,” you say with gleaming eyes.
You love Juyeon’s apartment; it has a soft and romantic atmosphere and it’s even more beautiful when the sun goes down. The many plants he has turn a warm orange with the colours of the sky and you swear, it’s so beautiful, like a haven of peace.
“Red or white?” He asks, holding the two bottles out for you.
“Anything’s fine, choose for me please Juyo,” you sing-song, happy to share this moment with him.
While you are setting up his balcony table with candles and wine glasses, he returns with a red bottle and appetisers. He gestures for you to sit on the bean bag and pour the wine like a real chef. You whistle, impressed by his newfound skill. Furthermore, it wouldn’t be Juyeon if he didn’t do a little dance to make you laugh before handing you your glass.
Now that he’s seated, you allow yourself to take in your surroundings. It’s quiet, but you can hear the faint music coming from the living room speakers. Juyeon has never liked the silence, so he always needs to have some kind of background music to feel comfortable. He says it calms him down, especially when he’s nervous, and you have to agree with that.
But does that mean that he was nervous right now?
He never needed music with you, as he always said your voice was his own melody – the harmony he couldn’t get enough of. 
“Thank you,” he whispers, pulling you out of your reverie.
You nod, knowing exactly what he means, and reach out to take his hand. He intertwines your fingers and, in the pink-orange hues of the sky you catch yourself blushing. You risk a glance to see him starring absent-mindedly into space and you seize the opportunity to stare him down.
His bangs, usually on his forehead are pushed back, giving him a more mature and sexy look. His eyes, in a beautiful crescent shape, shine with the intensity of the stars. His pretty nose sits up on his face, like a trophy ready to be claimed. And his lips. They’re curled into a gentle smile.
Without a care in the world, he runs his tongue over them and opens them as if he wanted to speak. But no sound comes out, except for the tongue he’s now biting. Suddenly, as if he was aware that you are looking at him, he turns to meet your gaze. Truth be told, you weren’t very discreet. His dark eyes hold yours, then move to your lips, and you see the faint beginnings of a smirk on his lips before he bursts into laughter. 
“Like what you see?” He points out, all smug.
That fucker.
You slapped him playfully before you realised you were biting your lips. Yet, he still looks at you as if you were the one who hung the stars in the sky and shone in their place.
All of a sudden, his eyes turn mischievous and you find yourself in his arms as he leads you into the living room. He turns up the music, grabs the camera, puts on a pair of framed glasses and starts dancing. You joined him, because there is no world in which you wouldn’t follow Juyeon. You dance like you’re in a club, grab the wine bottle and shout the lyrics at the top of your lungs. Juyeon films you through the mirror and you play along, you’re the model, he’s the artist. Until he puts the camera in a corner to film the both of you and starts to dance an old choreo that you both did. You smile broadly and the night goes by like this. In between drinking and dancing.
At some point, you find yourselves taking a stroll, jumping and dancing around poles. Oh, but you’re not drunk! Juyeon took out his camera and kept filming you, laughing. The man was hyping you up, the street was your runway! And even though it was a little embarrassing, you had a lot of fun. Trust Juyeon to make you feel the best!
Around midnight, you were eating ice cream in the nearest park when your phone screen lit up with a call.
Woo ☼.
Oh, no. You forgot to inform him you were going out with yesterday’s activities.
“Babyyyyy,” he whines, sounding tired, “where you aaaat.”
“At Juyeon’s, we-“ You’re cut off as Juyeon steals your phone, brushing against your hands a little too long.
“Sorry,” he hiccups, “is it all right if we keep each other company for the night? I can’t drive right now.” Juyeon tries to apologise but is cut short by Sunwoo.
“Had a fun night I see?”
You can feel his anger rising from the way his voice drops an octave. Sunwoo has always been jealous of Juyeon. When you got together, he was very insecure at first, knowing that you had a male best friend and seeing you spend so much time with him. It took some time, but the trust you’ve built up has overcome that awful feeling.
You still have to reassure him sometimes, and that’s okay because Juyeon is your best friend and Sunwoo is your boyfriend. You love them both in different ways. You talked about it with Juyeon and later he got jealous because you spent all your time with Sunwoo on your trip to comfort him. It wasn’t easy, but they learnt to trust you. Along the way, you may have convinced yourself that everything would be fine.
“Sunny, baby, I’m sorry I didn’t inform you. I will sleep at Juyeon’s and be back first thing in the morning before you wake up,” you say in a soft voice, trying to soothe him.
“I’m sorry too,” he voices out, letting out a breath lost in his own emotions, “I panicked when I didn’t see you at home. But I’m glad you’re all right.”
“I know,” you sighed, glancing at Juyeon, “I’m in good hands, I promise.”
“Hurry back, I miss my goodnight kiss already.” He replies, seemingly content with the current arrangement.
“Will be there in no time,” you giggled.
“I love you,” he answers, a smile blooming in his voice.
“I love you too.”
He hangs up just as he called, smiley, which makes you beam in return. However, when you turn to face Juyeon he’s anything but smiling. In his frowning eyes you decipher a sombre mood. Something in complete contrast to the joy you shared tonight. You reach out to grab his hand, but he pulls it back before you can do so.
“We should head back, it’s getting late.” He says firmly.
Your heart breaks at his words. Without giving him a chance, you cupped his face, forcing him to look at you. The hurt look in his eyes makes your heart swell. You scan him to see if he wants to answer, but he avoids you. You’re so close and yet so far away. You feel like throwing up, because your best friend never acted like this around you. He never once avoided you nor stopped talking to you. Thus, you did the only thing you can think of.
You hugged him, as tightly as you can.
You feel his heart pounding and wonder if it’s from the unknown emotions he’s carrying or from your physical touch. You put your hand on his broad chest to feel his heartbeat and plant a kiss on it to reassure him. It stirs something in Juyeon and he hugs you back so tightly you think you’ll lose your breath. He holds you in his arms for what seems like an eternity, your head nestled in the crook of his neck. But you don’t complain, you felt safe.
You stay there, in the warm embrace that contrasts with the cool of the night, squeezing him a little tighter when you hear passers-by whistling lovingly at you. When he lets go, you can see the faint pink colour that tints his cheeks, brought out by the street lights. But little did you know that you have the same colours on your face, if not stronger?
“You okay?” You ask as you rub small circles on his back.
“Yes I am,” he lies openly in a husky voice, “I’m okay.”
Juyeon is fucked. Completely screwed. He’s absolutely, unquestionably and sincerely in love with you.
He has been for quite some time, now that he thinks about it. But he never admitted it. That damned twist in his gut that never left his mind, he knows where it comes from now.
In order to cope with his newfound feelings he lets you use the bathroom first while he changes the sheets and tidies up the living room. He’s floating, not sure if he will ever get a wink of sleep. Especially if you both sleep in the same bed. Because to you, he’s just your best friend, the one you’ve slept with countless times. No strings attached.
He can’t imagine you in his arms, nor can he look forward to waking up by your side. You’re not his.
“Juyo?” Your tired voice echoes from the corridor. “C-Can I get some clothes?”
Oh. That doesn’t mean anything. You have always shared clothes. Then why was he so excited to see you in them? Right, because he’s madly in love with you and knows you will look ravishing in his big shirt. Also because sharing clothes is such an intimate thing couples do. If he lends you his current pyjamas because they have his scent on them, you couldn’t blame him. He’s just a man.
“Are you coming?” You inquire, walking towards him.
It’s worse than anything he’d ever imagined. The shirt is definitely too big for you going down one shoulder, showing the beginning of your chest and reaching halfway up your thighs. What’s more, your pretty thighs are covered by the shorts that rises up when you sit next to him. He looks away, embarrassed to be staring at you.
“I will sleep on the couch, don’t worry about me.”
“No way,” you retorted with little energy left, “your bed is big enough for both of us.”
He’s been acting strange today. First he was feeling all overconfident, then flirtatious, followed by anger, and now shyness and embarrassment. You take a piece of the blanket lying on his lap and you stretch your legs out on the sofa, letting your head fall on his shoulder. Sleep can wait, Juyeon can’t.
“Are you sure you’re okay? Don’t lie to me.” You ask, breathing softly into his ear.
“No,” he shudders, with a faraway look in his eyes, “I’m not okay and I don’t know how to get through this.”
“What’s wrong Juyo? Do you want to talk about it?” You pause to gauge his reaction. “Is it about your ex?”
“More or less,” he breathes out. “The breakup wasn’t that bad, like I said, it was a mutual decision. It’s just- when you started dating Sunwoo I was so happy for you, happy that you found someone who was worthy of your love and loved you the right way. And I thought I would be happy if I found that special someone, I longed for it. But I ended up in different relationships throughout the year, never lasting more than two months. And that’s ok, maybe they weren’t the right person for me, maybe it wasn’t the right time, maybe this, maybe that. I really thought I was going to be happy and I ended up getting my heart broken every time. As much as I believe now that I don’t deserve to be loved. I think I went into my last relationship in that state of mind, and I think she felt it too. Hard not to, is it? We had long talks and great times together; I think I really liked her. And I know she liked me back, I’m just not ready to be in an exclusive relationship right now.”
And everything he said is true, he’s more than happy for you and he thought he would be happy. But he can’t be happy in a relationship that isn’t with you.
“There’s also something I’ve never told you,” he continues, sniggering at the absurdity of his reasoning. “Something I should have told you a long time ago, it doesn’t make me proud, and it sort of reflects why my love life was so messed up. I can’t say it’s the only reason, but it played a big part in my mental health.”
You want to cry so badly, he has endured it all alone and it must have weighed heavily on him. At this point, you’re just waiting to speak and respond but every word that comes out of his beautiful mouth leaves you speechless. You’re such a bad friend that you’ve never noticed the way his eyes get dark and gloomy, or how he cancels your plans at the last minute because he’s got something else planned. When in fact it was sadness overload. Sure everyone has their own coping mechanisms, you wish you could have been there for him, but here you were Juyeon letting you in and you’re here to stay.
“It’s been two months since I was diagnosed with burnout and stopped working. It started off as something mild when I came home more exhausted than usual. I thought I wasn’t getting enough sleep but then I started to feel mentally, physically and emotionally exhausted. It was hard to concentrate on my daily tasks and you know how much I love my job? I felt like I was going to die because I couldn’t even have fun doing what I love. Going out with you, my friends or my ex felt great, but I wasn’t as invested as I used to be.” He pauses to catch his breath and swallow back the tears.
“Don’t get me wrong, today was absolutely perfect and I was hyped, I still am. Today felt like going back to when we were sixteen and I loved it. I’m actually starting to feel better. The break up helped a lot because it was taking a toll on my mental health. I know I said I liked her and I did, but I couldn’t help but feel unwanted. Even when she was riding me,” he chuckles, trying to lighten the mood.
“And it hurts that I didn’t have the guts to talk to you about it because I was afraid of how you would react. Like, hello, I’m taking a break from work because I feel like shit? And I would really like to get your approval so that I can move on. Because you mean everything to me,” he ends shyly.
“Juyeon,” you say in a soft and caring voice, “you mean the world to me too.”
You continued. “You mean the whole world to me and I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you needed me the most. I could come up with something, but it wouldn’t make up for what you’ve been through. You are strong, stronger than anyone. It’s so hard to keep your head above water that I’m proud of you for speaking up and even stopping work. Because focusing on your health is the most important thing. Situation and money may go but I will always stay. I’m so proud of you, proud of who you are and who you’re becoming. You’ll never stop growing and I’ll be there every step of the way, watching you blossom and be happy.”
“And I know you feel like you’ll never be happy,” you resumed, holding his hand. “The only thing I can say is, as hard as it seems, everything you live makes you stronger. Even more beautiful. There’s someone in this world waiting patiently for you, to love you properly, to make you feel loved and wanted. You’re an exceptional person, Juyeon. By that I mean you go above and beyond the call of duty, you give your total support and care, you show up when something’s wrong and I bet you’re an even more protective lover. We did everything together, cried, laughed, smiled, loved. My youth was filled with you and I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t happy because you were and are always by my side.”
“Today was the best time I’ve had in weeks, and that’s because I am with you. We danced, a lot. And you know how dancing has always been our escape,” you paused as you saw the first hint of a smile creep across his face as you continued. “I saw your smile, it was genuine and you were so beautiful. It may have been hard, you’ve been hard on yourself, but today the man I saw was happy. I’m happy because you’re happy, and I’m sad when you’re sad. We are one Juyeon, and I want you to know that I’m here for you, always.”
Long before you have finished speaking, he has taken you in his arms. His embrace is not heavy, but you can feel the weight on his shoulders lighten. You have so many feelings for him, they all blend together and you don’t seem to feel the butterflies in your stomach or the fire he has lit in your heart.
“I don’t know what I’d do without you,” he confesses.
“And what would I be without you?”
Your head rests on his chest and he’s suddenly afraid you can hear his heart beating. You’re so beautiful, your tired eyes fighting sleep and your lashes fluttering. His shirt slipped off your shoulder as he held you in his arms and the permanent smile on your face makes him completely weak. He could kiss you right now. If only you were single.
“Let’s go to sleep, hm?” He caresses your face, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.
“Together?” You cracked yet another smile.
“Together,” he grins from ear to ear.
Your arms find their way around his neck and you bend your head to make an implicit request. His hands go around your waist and below your knees before he stands up and carries you bridal style. You both laugh at the absurdity of the situation, but also blushed at the romantic gesture. He sets you down on (what his brain calls) your side of the bed and plants a kiss on your forehead.
He then goes through his nightly routine before coming back to you, wrapped in the covers, fast asleep. His heart is about to explode. Now that he is aware of his feelings, he is overwhelmed by the love he has been repressing. He slides in next to you and holds back from embracing you. And if you happen to get close and make your way into his arms, he’ll be delighted to hold you tight.
“Sleep well Starlight, I love you,” he mumbles, kissing your hair.
“I love you more Juyo.”
Waking up the next morning wasn’t as awkward as Juyeon might have thought after the pseudo-confession you heard. He woke up first when he felt you shift in his arms. Because yes, you ended up in his arms, face against his torso. He tried not to make a big deal out of it, calming his breathing and enjoying the warmth of your body. Absentmindedly, his hand caresses your tangled hair, smoothing it and slowly waking you from your slumber.
“Good morning Starlight,” he says, honey dripping from his hoarse voice. “Slept well?”
“Like a baby, you?” You yawned, looking up from his chest.
“Even better than a baby.” He doesn’t want to let you go, once you’re out of his bedroom he’ll have to go back to his little miserable life without your starlight to light it up.
“Shall we take you home? Your boyfriend might get impatient,” he laughs, remembering the events of the previous night.
“Well, he’ll have to wait until I’m full from breakfast! I know someone who makes pancakes to die for,” you winked as you get out of his clothes and disappear into the bathroom.
You know you said you’d be back before he wakes up, and you want to. You miss him. But being in Juyeon’s arms, feeling the regular beat of his heart, makes you feel at home. You don’t want to end what you both have now.
You eat breakfast in relatively silence, except when Juyeon tries to flip the pancakes in the frying pan only to have one stick to the wall. And you watch him adoringly from where you sit, trying to make up for his silliness.
In the end, you leave his apartment in no time at all, dreading your return to your own home. Even though you know that Sunwoo is patiently waiting for you. The last two days you spent with Juyeon were out of time, it was an enchanted interlude and the return to real life suddenly seems very difficult.
He drops you off in front of the building, not without kissing you on the cheek and saying goodbye for the last time. You try not to think of it as a date night as you head for the front door but he’s quick to say “We’re not done yet, you’ll see me more often now” he chimed as he watches you smile and gets in.
The smile doesn’t leave your face until you turn the key in the lock and come face to face with Sunwoo, smiling from head to toe. He takes you in his arms and spins you around before planting kisses all over your face.
“Sunny,” you giggled, “please.”
“But I missed you,” you press a kiss to his lips as he answers, and you feel him smile through it.
“I’m sorry I overreacted, you know I get scared easily, but I shouldn’t take it out on you when you haven’t done anything,” he apologised, bowing his head.
“No, it’s my fault too,” you shake your head. “We had a crazy night and when I woke up you were gone. I was also late and didn’t want to keep him waiting.”
“You know that I’m jealous of Juyeon, right? He might be your best friend, but he might see you as more than that. You can’t say you didn’t want him to wait, because what, you’re willing to make me wait like yesterday but not him? It’s unfair, because you always end up prioritising him.” He bellows, frustrated.
“Sunwoo please,” you begged. “Sunwoo, listen to me, please.” He takes a step back, feeling his anger rising.
“To say what? That you needed to be with him? That he needs you? Bullshit, look me in the eye and tell me he doesn’t have feelings for you!” He shouts in a pissed off rage.
He goes back into the living room and you follow him to see him pacing back and forth. You can tell he’s furious. He always gets angry when you mention Juyeon and it pisses you off. You can’t even spend a day with your best friend because he gets jealous? You’ve been together long enough to think he’s finally understood that he’s the one you love. But as displeased as you are, you’ll never stop telling him and reminding him that you love him. Because couples fight, because he’s insecure and because you care.
“You might as well develop feelings for him!” He spits vociferously.
“He broke up with his girlfriend and lost his job,” you drop, tired of this pointless battle. “So yes, he needed me. And yes, I needed to be with him. I feel like an absolutely shitty friend because I’ve been sitting in his company for weeks and I didn’t even notice that his heart was being broken to pieces. You can shout at me as much as you want Sunwoo, but you’re the one I love. Juyeon may need me again in the future and I’ll be there for him, but at the end of the day I love you and only you.”
“You’re lying. T-There’s no way he…“ He tries to take your hand but you step back, annoyed.
“Have I ever lie to you, Sunwoo?”
The sheepish and upset look on his face is enough to tell you that he’s blaming himself. So you lead him over to the sofa and tell him everything, from the break-up to his exhaustion, which means burnout, but leave out the private details. It’s a lot to take in, and you wonder if he’ll ever believe you. Why would you lie about something so important?
You love Sunwoo, you really do. But you can’t help but be a little irritated by his behaviour. You feel terrible for even thinking and feeling this way, but Juyeon is your best friend! What was wrong with that? What doesn’t he understand about the word “best friend”? You sighed as you take him in your arms and stroke his back, both to calm him down and to ease your own mind. You hold each other for a while, for as long as your hearts desire, but your minds wander to Juyeon. You miss him and you wonder what he’s up to, when you’ll see each other again. Another sigh escapes your lips and Sunwoo looks at you questioningly.
“Movie?” You ask, trying to divert your attention from Juyeon.
“It’s 11,” he chuckles, finally at peace.
“Yeah, so? We can order pizzas and spend the day at home?” You kiss his hand with doe eyes.
“Sounds like a fabulous idea,” he quickly grabs his phone to place an order, “same as usual?”
“I’m feeling adventurous today, so pick whatever you like!”
You hear your own phone buzzing as he focuses on the app again. And obviously it’s the boy of all the arguments, the one who’s been on your mind since you got home and who seems to be distracting you a lot.
Juyo <3 (1)
I miss ya, whatcha doing?
Thinking about u
That ain’t possible
Whyyyy
Because I’m thinking about you
“Who are you talking to with that smiley face?” Sunwoo asks, tilting his head.
“Changmin, he’s talking about the person he met and he seems so in love.”
It's a half-hearted lie, because Changmin told you about the person he recently met, but also because if you say Juyeon's name right now, civil war will break out.
Juyo <3
Oh yeah, prove it?
Seconds later, your phone rings with an incoming call from Juyeon.
Juyo <3
JUYEON YOU CAN’T DO THIS
YOU SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME
Aw pretty’s scared by a sudden phone call?
Actually…
You take a second to answer, pondering if it’s a good idea to tell him about your couple’s conflict. Especially when he’s the one causing it.
Juyo <3 (1)
Am I disturbing you?
You always turn my world upside down
Same goes for you Starlight ;)
So?
I had a fight with Sunwoo
Nothing bad, we already made up
But it’s becoming a recurring thing, and I hate it
Have you talked about it?
That it’s getting hard for you?
Yes and no
We always talk about it, set limits and make up but weeks later it’s as if the conversation never happened
As much as I love him I’m tired Ju
No, you don’t have the right to say you’re tired, because that would mean you’re ready to give up on your relationship for a few fights?
I’m afraid that’s not a valid reason
And I know you’re not the type to give up on someone you love
So take matters into your own hands, spend the day with him and make out ffs
Yeah, haha, you’re right
We’ll eat pizzas and watch a film, that’ll definitely help
And I’ll see if he’s nice enough to make out with him
I can be good for you instead ;)
Yah! You’re losing points Lee Juyeon!
I’m only aiming for the 10s sorry!
Right in the bull’s eye
Which is my heart yes
GTG JUYO
TTYL I LOVE YOU
<3
And I love you more <3
You saw his message through the notification, which you cowardly rejected, but that didn’t stop you from smiling. The conversation had to end quickly, as you were venturing into uncharted territory that doesn't leave you impassive. Besides, Sunwoo was getting suspicious of your big smile.
And he’s right, because what the hell was that? You’re such a coward whose heart beats a hundred miles an hour. He’s definitely winning points, but you’ll never admit it, and to what end? Your heart doesn’t know yet.
On the contrary, Juyeon’s heart beats wildly at your bravery. He doesn’t want to flirt despite his growing feelings, but you leave the door open too wide for him not to come in.
You’re still his best friend, so if you ever need advice or a listening ear, he’ll be there. Like that horrible joke about making out, he hated it. But he knew that it would make you laugh and feel better, because he knows you better than anyone else.
So why can’t he read your feelings? You're not usually so cryptic for no reason, he's sure of that. Yet the changes in your heart can be seen gradually: your sweet words, as well as the ambiguous ones, all carry a special and deep meaning. You’re a book Juyeon is dying to read, but you’re not descriptive enough for him to decipher just yet.
Sunwoo used to read you easily, but he’s not sure of anything anymore. He knows that you love him, that your love language consists of words of affirmation and that you never stop reminding him of it. And yet his insecurities always get the best of him and you end up fighting. The truth is, he’s afraid. You’ve always spent a lot of time with Juyeon and that’s fair, you’ve known each other for almost ten years. But shouldn’t you make up for that time with your one-year boyfriend?
He knows he can’t restrict you or your outings, that would be a dick move and he’s not a dick. You have lots of boy friends and he’s okay with that, but Juyeon? Juyeon annoys him. He seems too perfect to be true:  his looks, his gentle and romantic nature. He’s in a one-sided competition because Juyeon couldn’t care less. Or so he thought until now.
Halfway through the film, you're cuddled up in his arms, laughing, when his phone vibrates. Why on earth is Juyeon texting him?
Juyeon (1)
I just wanted to apologise for yesterday. This is not a valid reason, but I wanted to keep my best friend to myself for a while. I’m sorry if that hurt you.
Apology accepted. We’re adults and you’re defo not the one to blame but I appreciate it.
Thanks man
It cost Juyeon a lot to send that message. But in his place, he would have been furious if the situation had happened to him. So he toned it down, to ease the tension and make you feel better. But he’d do it again any time; anything to spend time with you.
And that’s exactly what happened in the weeks that followed.
You spent the whole week with Sunwoo after your meeting with Juyeon, going with him to his band rehearsals, shopping for clothes, accessories or window shopping, going on dates to the cinema, the park and restaurants. You did everything with him.
But that didn’t stop you from texting Juyeon every day. Sometimes he was the one who initiated the conversation, and other times you had to spam him to ask his opinion on the latest clothes you bought or because you missed him. Your weekly outings have also become two or three times a week, and you often meet up on his balcony for a night of dancing and drinks.
Everything is done with respect for your relationship, but you feel his hands on you longer than necessary, always within limits and sometimes in places that make you blush. For an example, he would place them on your hips, and you would be a fool to say that his little touches did not make your heart flutter. When he opens the door for you, when he orders for you without asking and never makes a mistake, or even when he gives you presents that you’ve looked at with envy. He’s so observant and attentive that causes butterflies in your stomach. The more time you spend with him, the more you can’t deny the attraction you feel.
He makes you feel like you are 16 again.
He kisses your forehead, cheek or hand when he drops you off. He holds your hand so you don’t get lost in the crowd. Even if it’s just an excuse, you let him because deep down you want him to.
And you hated yourself for it. You feel so guilty about Sunwoo. Yes, Juyeon may be a little more enterprising than usual, but he hasn’t changed his ways. You’re the one who reacts to harmless words and lazy touches. But your heart hasn’t changed. You love Sunwoo. Those feelings for Juyeon aren’t real. It is an attraction that arises because you spend all your time together, because he’s handsome and cares for you.
You’re not… in love with him.
Isn’t that right?
“Sweetheart, I bought fried chicken on the way home!” Sunwoo says one day after his rehearsal.
“Oh Sunny, you don’t know how much I’ve been craving it,” you clap, looking forward to devouring it. “Thank you.”
“Can I get a hug for being the most awesome boyfriend ever?” He asks sweetly.
“Oh you do,” you giggle, jumping into his arms.
“I love you,” he kisses your nose.
“Me too,” you reply, tiptoeing to kiss his forehead.
“Sunnyyyy,” you call out his name on a Friday afternoon. “Can I go out for the night with Kev, Minnie, Chani and Ju?”
“Sure! Don’t come back too late hm? And be careful.”
“Yes! I’ve got the four horsemen of the apocalypse to look after me and myself!” You laughed.
“Have fun Sweetheart, I love you,” he whispers, kissing your forehead.
“Me toooo Sunny,” you smiled.
And yet, as he does his best to be there for you, to shower you with love and care, you notice that your interactions are gradually diminishing. He’s not the problem but you are. Just like yesterday, you’ve been exchanging messages and at the end of all your conversations you have this cute habit of saying I love you. Except this time, you haven’t replied. You liked his message and replied with a heart.
But that’s not the only case, because you catch yourself not saying “I love you” back when you talk to him. Yet you’re still physically and intimately close. It’s as if you’re giving yourself to him in order to compensate for the emotional changes that you’re going through. And then what? You won’t even be able to kiss him? Hold his hand? Be intimate? You felt terrible, and this has been going on for months.
Perhaps the best (or worst) thing to do is to talk to him about it.
“Sunny? Can we talk?” You say out of the blue one morning.
“Yes baby, tell me?” He replies as he comes out of the bathroom, shirtless.
“Get dressed first,” you giggle.
“Why, don’t you like what you see?” He pouts, crossing his arms to emphasise his torso and you look away, ashamed to be turned on when you’re about to break his heart.
“Oh I do, but you’re distracting me from the point!”
“Sorry, sorry,” he laughs as he pulls on a t-shirt, “is it better now?”
“Yes, thank you,” you sigh.
“Are you okay?” He asks suddenly, sensing your discomfort. “You know you can tell me anything, I’m here for you.”
“Sunwoo, I-“ you take his hand in yours for support. “You need to know that I love you, it has never changed and it will never change, the feelings I have for you are very much real and I cherish them as much as I cherish you.”
“You’re not breaking up, are you? Because I won’t let you.” His eyes are shining now and you want to go back in time. You want to erase everything that has happened in the last two and a half months, the growing romantic feelings and the hurt.
“Sunwoo, I’m not breaking up with you, you’re the person I care about the most in the world, I would never let you down. And I hate myself for what I’m about to say.” You take a deep breath and as you do you know he’s figured it out and tears start to roll down his sweet face.
“I- fell in love with Juyeon,” you drop your head in shame.
You don't have the courage to look up and see the disappointment on his face, but you force yourself to. And when you finally did, his reaction catches you by surprise. It was obviously pain and sorrow, but also resilience?
“May I ask, how?” His voice is low, almost a murmur, but his eyes search yours for the truth.
“I- don’t know, it just happened.”
“Come on, you don’t just fall in love with another man by accident,” he laughs sarcastically.
“And yet I did!” You raise your voice in annoyance. “I didn’t choose it Sunwoo. And I would go back in time if I could!”
He takes a minute to consider your words, to decide whether or not you’re telling the truth. You didn’t expect this conversation to be easy, but he doesn’t make it any easier for you. You expected him to be in denial, to yell at you and cry. Instead he went straight towards the acceptance stage and he had this heartless look on his face. You knew you deserved it because he’s right; you don’t fall in love with another man by chance.
“Does he know? That you-“ he struggles to find the words, but you let him, because it has been hard for you too. You’re in love with your best friend, and you’ve probably been in love with him since you were 16. “That you love him?”
“No, oh god no!” You panic, finally thinking of the consequences, “I wanted to tell you first because I love you and I owe you the truth.”
“But you intend to tell him?” He worries and suddenly you feel like you’re talking to your best friend, the same conversation you had before you started dating Sunwoo.
“No Sunwoo, it was never a question of telling him or not. Yes, I love Juyeon romantically, but you’re my boyfriend. And I’m not trying to fool myself by saying that I still love you, I love you. And I love Juyeon too, but I’m not going to do anything with it.”
“You’re silly,” he chuckles affectionately. “Within the two months since our fight, I’ve watched you for a long time baby. I observed your body movements, your facial expressions and your words, hoping that it was all temporary and that we’d come out of it stronger together. But all I saw was love, but towards someone else. You came home giddy, eyes full of stars. Sometimes even in a frenzy of exaltation from which I found it hard to pull you out, because knowing that you were happy made me happy. So I won’t say that I knew it, but I sensed it. And I know that you love me, I have never doubted it and I don’t doubt it now. But you love him silly. Perhaps even more than you love me. I’m not mad at you, I saw you falling for him, I just ignored the signs. And I know you didn’t choose it, nor did you want to break my heart. Your love for him is stronger and I can hear it. Thank you for telling me, it must have cost you a lot.”
You start to cry, because what else can you do but cry? You love him and it hurts you to hear him say that you love someone stronger. But he’s right. No matter how much you try to deny it, you love Juyeon unconditionally.
“Why,” you cry out.
“Why what baby,” he takes you in his arms, guiding your head in the crook of his neck and your tears start to soak his t-shirt.
“I’m pretty sure I broke your heart and stomped on it, so why aren’t you mad at me? Why are you taking it so well? I don’t understand. I feel like shit and you’re too perfect?”
“You have no idea of the pain, anger and emptiness I feel right now, I’m far from perfect,” his voice falters as he tries to hold back his tears, “but I can’t take it out on you, even though you deserve it, because you didn’t want it? Also because I didn’t speak when I realised you were drifting away. I know you blame yourself, and yes, I am heartbroken, I can’t wait to cry but I don’t want to make you sadder than you already are.”
“I don’t deserve you Sunny, I’m sorry, I love you to the moon and back,” you smile shyly.
“And I love you just as much, thank you for the love that doesn’t make me feel lonely,” he smiles back as he rubs your back in slow motions. “Can I kiss you? One last time?”
“Thought you’d never ask.”
When his lips touch yours, it has never felt better. The kiss is a little salty because you have both been crying, but also sweet. It is your last kiss and you devour each other’s lips as if it were the first, not wanting to part. You quickly run out of air, but he presses his lips to yours to convey his feelings one last time and you smile, knowingly, as you kiss him back.
“You should go to him,” he says, lips swollen and eyes puffy.
“Yes, to be with my best friend. And you should call Eric for the same reason,” you sobbed, and he giggles.
“Coward,” he laughs, “but I will.”
“And Sunwoo,” you start again. “I would never do anything without your approval.”
“Thank you,” he replies, touched and aware of the feelings you will always have for him. “For everything, but especially for being with me.”
“I should be the one thanking you, my lifesaver,” you kissed his cheek as you take his hand in yours. “Let’s remain good friends, in the future.”
“Absolutely, if I ever get over you,” he laughs in a reassuring way.
You know that the joke is just his way of breaking the tension, so you laugh it off, saying that he should, and you imitated a knife at your throat as a warning, which makes him laugh heartily. Then, your heart sinks at the sound of you no longer being the recipient. Yes you fell in love with someone else, and it will be just as hard to get over him. But you have Juyeon, and he’s your rock.
Juyo <3
Juyo can I come over?
Sure, is something wrong?
These three words are enough to turn your heart upside down. He’s always been thoughtful, and now that you’ve accepted your feelings, you feel butterflies swirling in your tummy.
Juyo <3
Sunwoo and I broke up
I’ll pick you up in 5
Yes pls, drive safely
He pulls up in the parking lot exactly 5 minutes after his message, just like he said. You rush down the stairs, too eager to melt into his arms to wait for the lift. He doesn’t have time to get out of the car before you throw yourself on him, crying. Tears of separation and heartbreak, and tears of joy when you see him again because you know you love him.
“I’m here,” he whispers in a panicked voice, probably not expecting you so soon and in such a state. “I’m right here, let it out.”
And you do, the feelings you’ve been burying for 2 months are just waiting to be expressed. You cry until your body aches from lack of air and your eyes are dry. Finally, you shiver and regret having gone out so quickly without covering up. But Juyeon is just as quick to pull the jacket he was wearing over your shoulders and you hum happily as his scent washes over you.
“Let’s go home?” He caresses your hair tenderly.
You’re amazed that he doesn’t ask any questions, he just stands by you and supports you through this difficult ordeal that he knows only too well. And the truth is, he’s even sad for you. No matter how much he loves you, you’re the definition of love to him. For you to break up with Sunwoo, for whatever reason, doesn’t make any sense. It’s not his place to ask if you don’t tell him first, so he just holds your hand on the way back, and when he has to let go to change gear, he makes sure he puts it back on your thigh.
This makes you blush like a tomato, how dare he put his big hand on your thigh, almost completely covering it whole. You’re pretty sure your feelings are written all over your face, but he mistakes your blushing for embarrassment, when in fact it’s just romantic stimulation. You look up to see if his hand placement has any effect on him, only to find that he is blushing as well. Being as dense as he is, you mistook his shyness for embarrassment.
You two definitely make quite the pair.
“Make yourself at home Starlight,” he says as he opens the front door, never stopping to hold your hand.
You step inside as he tells you to and try to take off your shoes, planning to curl up on the sofa under the blanket while you wait for him and his hugs. But he had other ideas as he grabs your wrist to pull you closer, pinning you between him and the newly closed front door. Your surprise translates into a gasp that becomes a choke as he drops to one knee. Your heart pounds in your chest at the way he looks at you, worshipping you. Without warning, he bends down to untie your shoelaces, still smiling and even a little mischievous.
“What?” He smiles proudly. “Can’t I look after my Starlight?”
You open your mouth to speak but no sound comes out, too surprised by his playful tone.
“Cat got your tongue?” He sticks out his tongue as he stands up.
“Yes, you got it!” You slap him gently as a reward for nervousness.
“Not in my mouth though…” He whispers so quietly you almost don’t hear it, and that earns him another slap, only he steps back to avoid your blow and you stumble and fall on top of him.
“I guess it will be easier to carry you now,” he chuckles, kissing your forehead.
He puts his arms under your knees and around your waist and you squeal as he lifts you up, bridal style. This man will be the death of you. Oh, how you would kiss him if you weren’t so heartbroken and hadn’t just broken up. And he would kiss you just as much. You’re both madly in love and it shows.
He wraps you in a blanket as he lays you down on the sofa before kissing your forehead for the umpteenth time. Then he goes into the kitchen and fetches your favourite foods, drinks and desserts, which he sets out on the coffee table. You were surprised by the homemade dishes, as if he’d made them with a special purpose in mind. But he doesn’t say a word or make a comment, he just slips under your blanket when he’s done and hugs you, breathing in your scent.
You stay in each other’s arms for a while, not saying a word, just enjoying your hearts beating in unison. It feels heavenly, relaxing and you can almost feel yourself coming back to life. If Sunwoo was your lifesaver, Juyeon is your guardian angel. He is always looking out for you and giving you his utmost special care, just like right now, for no particular reason (even if there is one now).
He doesn’t pry, he just waits for you to speak while he grabs the remote to put on the latest show you’ve started together and feeds you. You’re quite grateful for the little comments he makes during the show, distracting you from the truth: the burning love you have for him that consumes you. In the end, you tell him that you still love Sunwoo, but that your recent incessant arguments have taken their toll on you.
That, against all odds, you’ve spilt up properly. And that it will be a while before you move on, but that the door is not closed. You made sure to emphasise this part, because what if there’s a small chance that Sunwoo was right and Juyeon is a fool in love with you? You’re not ready yet, but when the time comes, you want to confess your love to him and live out the childhood romance you’ve always dreamed of, until death do you part.
The next few of weeks passed in a blur, and you have basically settled into Juyeon’s apartment – going back and forth to your house to pick up your things and put them in his closets. Your shoes sits nicely in the new shoe rack he bought for you to go out together, and your toothbrush sits proudly next to Juyeon’s. You even have matching ones. Oh, and Juyeon can finally happily say that you’ve got your side of the bed, with your cute belongings on the bedside table and a picture of the two of you at 16 in a frame.
In fact, you slowly become a domestic couple-like going grocery shopping together and going on so-called dates. Life with Juyeon is easy. Whether you go out at dawn or dusk, he’s always with you, matching your pace and holding your hand from the streetlights to the dancing starlight. When you saw your hands touching and your steps overlapping, it reminds you of your first encounter and the fluttering of your heart. How you shyly looked at him, only to see him already looking at you lovingly, red on his cheeks. That cold winter you spent together was actually the warmest moment of Juyeon’s life, and that day might have been the day you hid a present for each other in your sleeve.
Even more slowly, your relationship with Juyeon develops as the months go by. It was hard not for it to blossom, considering the fact that you live together and that you absolutely do everything together, but it’s happening. Juyeon has started to walk around bare chest when he gets out of the shower and sometimes! He even goes to bed naked, with just his pyjama pants hanging low on his hips.
Of course, you get to snuggle up against his warm chest and cuddle to sleep. When it comes to sleeping, you don’t even try to fall asleep on your own side of the bed anymore because you always wake up in each other’s arms. You have definitely grown closer and closer in just a few months.
Your touches with one another have become more sensual and romantic and your words more flirtatious. You wear his clothes more often than usual, sometimes getting out of bed in just his t-shirt and underwear, awakening certain feelings within him. From time to time, he dares to put his hands under your (his) t-shirt and kiss your forehead tenderly, for lack of being able to kiss your lips sensually and make you his, right when you wake up.
“All pretty for me hm?” He said the first time you went to sleep in this garment. “You know I’m just a man.”
And if you sat on his hips to cuddle him afterwards, maybe the message got through. Maybe a little too much, given that a few minutes later he pretended to be in a hurry and the water ran for a long time. He’s just a man.
Yes, your man.
Another time, when you were out shopping at the mall, people addressed you as a couple and you didn’t mind, oh no. Perhaps it was the smiley eye contact you made, or the way he held you in his arms and you leaned into him, almost as if you were going to kiss, that gave it away. At least, that’s what gave Sunwoo, who was watching you nearby, the courage to send you a message.
Woo ☼ (1)
Hi, hello! I saw you at the mall with Juyeon, can we talk? I’m with Changmin, we can ditch them together?
Hi Sunny!!! Sure we can, the cafe nearby?
Juyeon was a little reluctant to leave you alone with Sunwoo due to the countless nights you spent crying and the difficulty you had opening up (not to mention your blossoming love for Juyeon) but he quickly gave up because he knew you wanted it and he was happy to spend time with Changmin. Juyeon is the love of your life and you can’t pretend that he isn’t anymore.
“Hi Sweetheart, I saw you left your shopping bags with your man,” he laughs and you kick him under the table so as not to draw attention to yourself.
“Stop that Kim Sunwoo!” You whine.
“Stop what? Calling you sweetheart or calling him your man?”
“Both!” You laugh embarrassed and shy.
“How are you?” He changes the subject after one last laugh and you’re happy to see that he hasn’t changed, he’s still as playful and lively as ever.
“I’m fine, nothing has really changed since our last messages. I told you I got my dream job, so Juyeon and I are treating ourselves with my first salary. Oh, and Juyeon has also found a new job he’s really enjoying. Hence, the reason why we’re out shopping.” You went on to rave about your everyday life, happy to share this new chapter with him, whom you still love very much, just not romantically anymore.
“You must love him a lot,” he says softly, almost as if he were muttering to himself. “It’s cute, you’re cute, I’m happy for you.” And you don’t answer, curious to hear what he’s going to say next.
“I’ve been thinking about you a lot over the past six months,” he begins. “Thank you for always reaching out to me and not ghosting me despite the break-up, it meant a lot to me. Being away from you has been hard. I will not lie. But it also taught me that I was too dependent on you and it felt great to spend time by myself and with our friends. I got news from them and saw that you were doing well, as anyone going through a break-up would be. And it made me realise that, if you were fine, I should be fine, even if it was just a facade, that somehow the sadness would pass.”
You nod to let him know you’re listening and that you’re on the same wavelength as him.
“And it did,” he whispers almost happily, as if the weight he was carrying close to his heart has been lifted. “I thought I would love you for the rest of my life, but then I met someone.” You gasp at his words and tear up a little.
“It came as a blessing, without me even looking for it, and I can say that I’m happy now. So when I saw you so happy on Juyeon’s arm, looking at him lovingly like he hung the stars in the sky I thought: “Ah, you’re really on cloud nine with him”. I shouldn’t hold you back from your happiness. You have my blessing, not that you need it but date him, kiss him, make love and live happily ever after.” To emphasise his words, he squeezes your hand which he has started to hold somewhere in his monologue, and kisses it.
You swear you didn’t want to cry, and Juyeon will probably be worried to see your swollen eyes, but how can you remain impassive in the face of so much love? It’s true, you held back and would have kissed Juyeon if it wasn’t for Sunwoo. But now you’ll both be happy.
You chatted for quite a while, enjoying your reunion as friends, learning more about the person he had met and ranting about your life with Juyeon, when he appeared before you with Changmin, impatient to get you back. You missed him. How did you manage to live without Juyeon so far? Ecstatic, you jump into his arms and bid your goodbyes promising to meet again soon. As you walk away, Juyeon’s phone beeps and he just shrugs at the message in his inbox with a smile. Then he ruffles your hair, earning a pout from you that he kisses away at the corner of your lips. You wonder what the message was, but the kiss is definitely more important.
Sunwoo (1)
I’ve seen the way you look at each other, it’s full of love. Give it a shot!
Yes, there will be many more kisses now.
And here you are today, on Juyeon’s couch, enjoying your home date for the tenth anniversary of your friendship, with Sunwoo’s blessing in the back of your mind. You spent the day cooking together, sweet and savoury, having fun with the shapes of the cakes and pizzas (hearts and dicks like the children you are), playing games, dancing and listening to music in a good-natured atmosphere.
Today’s a day to celebrate your friendship. Yes friendship, when all you want to do is kiss him senseless. Maybe confessing today is not such a bad idea. Especially when you see him coming out of the shower in all his glory, beads of water running down his naked torso, hair tousled and wet, tongue running over his lips sensuously as he looks you straight in the eye, ready to pounce on you. Oh, and, his cinnamoroll pyjama pants, low on his hips and revealing the Apollo belt of his abs, make you smile as much as it turns you on.
Juyeon takes his place between your legs, smiling, his hot muscular back resting on your chest as he lays his head back on your shoulder, dampening your matching melody pyjamas. He chuckles as he turns his head to see you gawping. His big veiny hand that had been squeezing your thigh flies to your cheek, turning your flushed face towards him so he can kiss the pout at the corner of your lips. His beautiful lips linger a little longer on your neck, but you welcome his touch with open arms and lean into his embrace.
His eyes are full of stars when he rises from your embrace to grab the remote and turn on your series. But he remains seated between your legs, unconsciously resting a hand on your knee to preserve the intimacy you’re so immersed in. You help him on with his t-shirt, not without kissing his shoulder first, making him shiver. And your hands take the opportunity to wander down his torso to his waist, making him smirk as well. You become more and more adventurous, he loves it and can’t wait to run his lips all over your body, discovering all of it.
You place a kiss on the crown on his hair and when you notice that it’s already dry, an idea crosses your mind. Juyeon’s focus is back on the show, so much so that he can barely feel your hands playing with his hair. You give him a rather pleasant massage, moving down to the small of his chest, across his neck and up into his hair, twisting it between your fingers.
“How does it feel?” You murmured in a hushed tone.
“Heavenly,” he moans.
The tension is palpable as you continue your services, your hearts beating wildly, almost as one. He takes one of your hands in his to kiss it, the attention making you blush, before replacing it in his hair and nodding for you to continue. So you undertake one of the most romantic acts of love in your eyes, braiding his hair. Strand by strand, your fingers caress the edges of his face. The braids come undone as quickly as they are made, but he smiles broadly as he touches them, feeling butterflies in his stomach and his heart beating erratically.
“I could see our everyday life like this,” you whisper in his ear. “Together.”
Juyeon, who had been purring at your display of affection, becomes still when he hears your words. He slowly turns to face you with the most charming smile and tenderly takes your hand to place it on his chest, where his heart burns with love. The fire in his eyes burns inexorably, lighting up his already sunny face, unable to leave him. You’re captivated by this intensity and he doesn’t look away, also in love with your sparkling eyes, even when he reaches out to grab a little box that has always been right in front of your eyes. Yes, his love has always been on display. You were just too slow to catch on.
But you get it now. You’re two fools in love.
“You know how our youth is filled with each other’s names?” He says, voice a little hoarse and heart beating fast under your palm. “Well, my heart has never changed, I’ve always wanted to be with you. You are my breath of fresh air, the warmth that keeps me going through the winter, and the words I’m about to tell you will never melt away. My everything is all about you, it has always been about you.” He pauses to take a deep breath and kisses the palm of your hand, which he then links with his own, intertwining your fingers.
“I love you,” he sighs with love and happiness. “I love you so much that I was reading my destiny inside your eyes without even knowing it.” The flame of love he has carried all these years dances in his eyes, making him irresistible and captivating. Your heart is pounding in your chest as you wait for his question, palpitations he feels through your bound hands.
“Would you be mine?” His gaze, dropping to your lips then back to your eyes, is determined as he opens the velvet box to reveal two rings. Not just any rings, the matching promise rings to the bracelets you bought months ago. The ones on your wrists that you’ve never taken off.
As if on cue, as a sign of future commitment, he kisses your left ring finger and places the ring on your right with such tenderness that you almost cry. No, you’re pretty sure tears are rolling down your face because he puts his thumb under your eyes to gently wipe away the tears and kisses the salty drops that have run down your cheeks, close to your lips. With that, you mirror his actions by kissing the ring, his left ring finger and placing it on his right finger with a dazzling smile, as an unspeakable promise – that you’ll spend the rest of your lives together.
“I have always been yours. I love you Juyeon, so much that I’m going crazy.”
Even now, after confessing his feelings and hearing yours, he remains respectful and lets you make the first move with a victorious smile. You grin, feeling the cool material of the ring on your cheek as he cups your face in his hand, reminding you that this is all real and that he loves you.
And he does.
So you finally lean in, closing the gap between you to rest your lips on his. It was meant to be a soft and quick peck, but he captures your body and deepens the kiss, years of longing and wanting not to be wasted, leaving you breathless. His lips search yours every time you pull away, not wanting to let go, intoxicated by your lips and this new closeness. If you spend the rest of the evening making out and exploring each other, no one will say a word. Not even your neighbours.
Ah, you’ve never been in love and wanted to be with anyone as much as you do with him, and this since you were 16.
259 notes · View notes
madame-fear · 1 year ago
Note
Hello sweetness! I am here to requests something from you, feel free to ignore since I know you probably have so many requests right now. But I’m back in my hotd faze and wanted one of my favorite writers to write something. <3
Could I request a Lucerys Velaryon where he is newly betrothed to a lovely girl, us, who he falls head over hells for. The two being very sweet to one another, and the reader being scared to be married to a prince but he is there always. But the plot is about how closer to the wedding date the reader is trying back on her dress and just dreaming and Luke comes in and sees it? I really love lovestoke Luke! Please and thank you.
-Love, Ash.
*ೃ༄ 𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐊 𝐊𝐈𝐒𝐒𝐄𝐒.ೃ࿐
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★amira speaks! : hello my lovely !! 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 Oh my god, you have NO idea how happy I felt when I got your request on my askbox 🥺 I made this as fluffy as possible for one of my favourite writers too, and I hope you enjoy your reading, darling! 💕 — summary : [ — ✧ request. ] — word count : 2.5k
— genre : purely fluff. — pairing : lucerys velaryon x reader.
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The word ‘betrothal’ had always been a term that frightened you.
From a young age, you had learned that betrothals were most often — actually, it was always — done as an act of political convenience; to ally different Houses together and strengthen their bond. Knowing it was an unwanted marriage, and often women were unhappily stuck in them, you forever kept yourself reluctantly terrified towards the idea of having to marry a Prince, or a Lord by the time you were a grown girl; not wanting to suffer.
And by the time it was your turn to get betrothed, your parents and yourselves travelled to Dragonstone, preparing to meet the Prince you would be married to in a future. Such overwhelming nerves and fright seemed to burden you more than anything during your entire journey, feeling as if you could melt right in the spot, with a desperate need to get out of there.
But fortunately for you, by the time you reached Dragonstone, you had been blessed with an eternally loving, timid young Prince. It was none other than the secondborn son of Princess Rhaenyra Targaryen, the future Lord of Driftmark: Lucerys Velaryon.
You had all been warmly welcomed by the Targaryen Princess herself, whom immediatly made you feel comforted as you noticed her tender, sweet nature around you — treating you as if you were her own daughter. And by her side, awkwardly stood Lucerys. It was nearly impossible to ignore him, feeling his gaze fixed on you the entirety of the time as you were received by House Targaryen.
Much like you, it was quite notorious the young Prince carried a timid nature. By the moment your gaze met with his own gorgeous, vivid green hazel eyes, he rapidly adverted his stare elsewhere, shyly smiling to himself and trying to hide the fluster that kept growing on his pale face as the seconds passed. Luke had both of his arms hidden behind his back at that moment, yes, but you could still tell that he was nervously fidgeting with his own hands and fingers. Gods, you were such a pretty, graceful lady, and Lucerys was already over the moon for you despite having merely shared a brief moment of eye contact together.
The idea of having to leave your home to live with your betrothed was, initially, a complicated thought to process; especially during the first days of your staying in Dragonstone despite how kind and patient everyone treated you. But of course, as you were often sat next to Lucerys during dinner and had some small chats together throughout the day — as awkward as they were in the beginning — you were quick in taking a liking for the future Velaryon Lord. Most definitely, it was his endearingly shy self the one that had carved it’s own way into your heart, and the one that managed to completely twist in a good way your sense of frighten at the thought of the word ‘betrothal’.
Tranquil, leisure strolls through the gardens, hours of reading to one another together, and sneaky late night talks was how you both spent your days until your wedding ceremony arrived. And even, Luke had gone as far as teaching you some High Valyrian so you would know the language and culture of his own family.
Of course, the nervousness regarding your marriage and the wedding continously lingered in you, gnawing every bit of your mind despite having a perfectly sweet relationship with Lucerys. And knowing how you felt, becoming used to freely speak up your mind whenever you were alone together, Luke never failed to comfort and soothe you by expressing his own nerves, but at the same time, reassuring you that he was certain all would go more than well as every preparation for the occassion had been carefully organisated properly.
It was the warmth that the Velaryon Prince constantly offered to you, that made you be over the moon and clouds for him, just in the exact way he felt around you. It had taken no time for you to become his ‘gevie rūklon’ — his pretty flower, being as delicately graceful as the petal of a rose. The one he was more than eager to cherish and show his undying adoration with each day that passed, and you couldn’t help but often thank the Seven for blessing you with such a loving future Lord Husband. With each passing day, you found yourself balancing between the thin string of feeling jittery, and an increasing zeal the closer you were to your wedding day.
And there you stood two nights before your official wedding date, staring at yourself in front of the mirror, simultaneously swinging between such emotions that equally made your heart violently pound against your chest in a way that your hands were visibly trembling. Softly, you adjusted the silk wedding dress that they had prepared just for yourself. As expected, you had already tried the dress on the moment the seamstresses were finished with sewing the very last details — but you were allured into trying it again, imagining how everything would go and practising for the official date.
Faintly, a soft sigh escaped from your nostrils, with a little grin tugging at the corner of your lips. Both your hands were clasped in front of your body, grasping the delicate texture of your dress against your skin. Your breathing became hitched softly, processing the thought of becoming officially married to a future Lord whom you already wholeheartedly adored.
You had spent endless hours in front of your mirror, reading your own wedding vows to yourself and making sure that you wouldn’t either stutter, mess up, or stumble upon your words. And even so, despite already knowing by heart your vows to your betrothed, you still continued to re-read them again, or mentally repeat it.
Your gaze lingered on the ground for a few seconds, admiring quietly the dedication the seamstresses put into your wedding dress, before you managed to raise it to stare at your own face. A nervous frowny grin tugged at the corner of your lips, feeling a flustered heat creeping to your cheeks. As your chambers were silent, the only thing you could ever hear was the sound of your heartbeat increasing by the passing of the seconds, along your soft huffing.
Overall, digging deeper beyond the obvious nerves you felt, there was an immeasurable feeling of joy. The thought of having been blessed with such an endearing future Lord Husband, who had also became your best friend and companion, brought a warming comfort in you that made you eager to the official wedding day. The sight of your own reflection on your dress was more than enough for you to helplessly wander through your own daydreaming.
Dumbfoundedly, your grin became wider as you could already imagine how your wedding would go. And not only you daydreamt about the wedding feast, the way you would be delightfully surrounded by your family, closest relatives, and perhaps how other Lord and Ladies would attend the celebration — but as well, you couldn’t help but imagine how joyful you would be spending the rest of your days by his side, pampering one another with tender caresses, and soft kisses.
Having one another for the joyful and sorrowful moments in your life, and even, having precious little children of your own surrounding both of you. The early prospect you had of how your marriage would be made you nearly melt from adoration. Your gaze remained fixed in your own reflection, smiling to yourself as your mind solely focused and dreamed of what was yet to come.
The door of your chambers were swung open swiftly, yet quietly — provoking a faint creaking sound before it was closed shut. Upon hearing the faint noise, you were quick in snapping out of your little daydreaming, adverting your gaze towards the person entering the quarters. It was, of course, none other than your betrothed; as he had gotten used to entering your chambers in the middle of the night without even knocking, especially when he couldn’t sleep.
A heated dark shade of red crept in your face, gulping timidly as soon as you made eye contact with Luke through the reflection of the mirror. Before managing to mutter a word, his green hazel eyes were fixed on you. The way you so gracefully stood in front of the mirror, using the wedding dress prepared just for yourself that was adorned with dragons and dragonscales imagery, made him awkwardly stand at your door.
Part of him wished to advert his gaze elsewhere, in a poor attempt to hide his overwhelmingly shy fluster; but another part of him, insisted on remaining with his stare on you. Gods, you were such a precious girl— how could he not swoon over you, like he always did? And seeing you in such a beautifully detailed wedding dress made his heart skip one, or two beats. Needless it was to mention the fact that since you were two days away from officially getting married, that already provoked on him some sleepless nights; and seeing you wearing that wedding dress made him feel as if he could melt right there.
The first time you had tried on your wedding dress, he didn’t have the opportunity to take a peek of how you would look. But now, curiousity was eased delightfully. If anything, it served to fuel his already undying adoration for your sweetly graceful nature.
Clearing his throat shyly, his green eyes gazed down to the floor. Both his hands were clasped in front of his body. “I’m... Sorry,” he began speaking meekly. Noticing the timid fluster notoriously creeping on his pale skin made you have to fight back a giggle. “Am I interrupting something, my love?” his eyes lingered on the ground, before reluctanctly gazing up at you shyly. You shook your head in response, before being able to mutter a response.
“Good.” with soft footsteps, Luke approached you. “You can’t sleep, too?” a scoff escaped from you, fixing your gaze on his features as he walked towards you very slowly. “Is it too obvious?” you inquired back teasingly as a helpless grin appeared on your lips, getting a chuckle from him as a response. “I can tell, my love.” as soon as Lucerys stood by your side — noticing him slightly taller than usual —, his green eyes stared at you through the reflection.
The way Luke so endearingly admired how precious you looked for your wedding ceremony made you want to squirm under his gaze, and giggle like a little girl with a crush. “I haven’t been able to sleep either,” his arms remained behind his back, feeling as if his staring to your reflection wouldn’t allow him to do anything else, just... Stare foolishly in love. “Our wedding ceremony is two nights away, and I feel restless.”
Seeing you in the wedding dress was too alluring to get lost in the daydreaming of your near future together. His smile seemed sheepish as his green eyes carefully observed every inch of yourself, treasuring you as his future Lady Wife. You had rapidly turned into his greatest pride, and Luke knew he would eventually show you off to everyone. Not like he wasn’t already doing so, either way.
“But overall...” his arms appeared from behind his back, walking to stand behind of you. Gently, his arms wrapped themselves around your waist, pulling you tightly against his chest in an adoring way. The warmth of his firm embrace was soothing, as he placed his chin on the crook of your neck, moving his stare towards your reflection once again. “I’m proud of having you as my future Wife.”
Of course, all his compliments were genuine — but most of the time, Lucerys appreciated seeing you become flustered at his displays of affection. Your hands were placed on his arms, caressing them gently. “You look more than beautiful,” he cooed, nuzzling the tip of his nose softly against your skin, “I can’t wait until our wedding ceremony. I know you will be such a loving wife and companion, as you already are.” with his words, his lips placed soft kisses on your skin, moving from your neck, to your cheek.
And in his words, there was no lacking in honestly. Each time his eyes took a peek at you, especially at the current moment where you tried back on your dress, his breathing got stuck on his throat; with his heart pounding loudly against his chest. Your giggles with each one of his loving kisses encouraged Lucerys to keep going, and if it were possible, he would shower you in his kisses eternally.
A contented growl spurred from your lips, craning your head lazily towards him, managing to place your lips on the skin of his rosy cheeks. “Sometimes I wonder, what have I done to possibly be blessed by the Seven to earn such a sweet, and attentive betrothed such as yourself?” you could feel his smiling lips grasping against your skin, holding a protective grip around your body.
Sighing, he managed to rest his chin on the crook of your neck, trying to catch his own breathing before continuing to fill you with kisses. Those sleepless nights were more than worth it, marrying such a precious beauty as yourself — and who could blame him? If he managed to even get some rest the two days before your wedding, Luke knew his dreams would be invaded by you walking down the aisle, in such detailed dress. “I can only wonder to myself the same thing, my sweet.” he replied briefly.
Allowing your head to rest against his own, his eyes stared at you through the reflection of the mirror. There weren’t enough words to express his admiration towards you, swooning inwards to himself at the sight of your vibrant grace.
Despite the obvious anxiety you equally felt regarding the ceremony, such as everything going as planned, and none of you stumbling upon your words when it came to reading your vows to one another, there was an exuberant eagerness to refer to each other as your own.
But, if anything— there was one thing that would be difficult for him to overbear during the ceremony. The sweet scent emanating from you was merely intoxicating, and his lips continued to playfully grasp against the skin of your neck, admiring you quietly.
“I do have to warn you,” shortly, he trailed off. His lips became in a dumbfounded grin, drunken with the feeling of a loving worshipping towards your entire self. Adoring you so much, that could make his heart combust at any second. You were bewitching at the sight.
Your eyebrows furrowed in curiousity before he continued, gripping your waist tighter, before one of his hands found your own, and squeezed it faintly. “I plan on not keeping my lips to myself during our wedding, especially if you are to look this gorgeous.”
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♡ taglist : ♡
@jacesvelaryons @jjamieberry @anemicroyalcore @countsmoon @beeebo234 @manuholland6 @capellaadara @kyuupidwrites @tchatso @dopepersonacloudllama @phantasyy @tasty-nutella @mstxdes @valeriecash @cookielovesbook-akie @zzz000eee @bellarkeselection @feliuuuksks @visenya-reigned @maria699669 @mariaelizabeth21-blog1 @sweethoneyblossom1 @jamiemydeer @snowprincesa1
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trynafindbarbiee · 2 years ago
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VOID SUCCESS STORY <3
TW : Abusive family, bullying, suicide attempts!
Before I go straight into my success story I wanna THANKYOU from the bottom of my heart you are my fairy Angel and I love you more than anyone else bestiee :)
I'm sharing this here so everyone can see this
It's been so long since I've joined loa community but I always failed to manifest Consciously , I would constantly look for the 3D to change and I literally wasted years to learn how to manifest when it's the most easiest thing in the whole universe. Then luckly I came to know about the void state but I kept on failing I was unhealthy obsessed with the void with this my mental health became even worse I started to feel like not living anymore. I felt anxious very often, then one day I decided to end my life because things were getting terrible everyday. I attempted suicide and it failed and then the very first thing someone told me after this was "it failed because you deserve to live, you deserves the best, you deserves the world" And guess who it was! SHE WAS MY FAIRY ANGEL 🥺 YOU! MY BESTIEE <3 I'm very thankful to have a friend like you
What I've learnt over time is that these feelings are definitely not permanent and this too shall pass YES it hurts and survival feels difficult but the hope I got from my bestie (Barbie) throughout my recovery process is just unmatched, unexplainable especially for someone like me who keeps thinking that things will never get better. At the same time I was living in a abusive household I was being hated by my parents, friends, neighbours And one day IT'S nowhere near as bad as what you'll get, but my mom had a small amount of narcissist in her. SHE HELD MY HAND OVER A GAS STOVE because as an 15 year old I wrote something that she disagreed with in my journal. I experienced violence with my mother and father beating each other. Seeing drugs being used and knowing that there was something bad and wrong. I also seen my mother having sex with other men and once heard her having sex and I thought she was being beaten.As I got older, I began questioning her medieval methods. Whenever I brought it up, She would always say that she did it for my own good, or that she was showing me how the real world was like. As a baby, I was ferberized. I was sent to a daycare from the moment I could walk. My mother would often punch and slap me in the face, and so I developed a reflex where I put my hands near my head in defense if anyone raises their hands. I have been bullied and ridiculed.
I have overconsumed info to a point where I even started doubting bloggers and loa but then I met my fairy Angel, my life, my bestieeeee 🥺💗 Everyone, let me tell you all of you one thing that she's a real life Angel I swear! She was there with me when my own family was against me, she helped me through my toughest times, she never let me down, she took care of me like a big sister. I'M BLESSED TO HAVE A FREIND LIKE YOU CUTIE PIE <3! we started journey together and she entered the void but I was still struggling. When she messaged me telling that she did it I literally jumped out of my bed and cried, cried and cried I WAS SO HAPPY FOR HER. I got superrrr motivated after that so I took her advice and tried to enter the void once more but I still failed, I didn't enterbut she kept me motivated . She showed me the things and her mansion that she manifested so that I don't doubt void anymore and I'm so grateful to you for that . She told me to try to wake up in the void instead of entering I again listened her and tried and guess what! SHAMEFULLY I again failed , I was giving my power to a method, I didn't realize how powerful I AM.
After all the failed attempts I called Barbie and talked to her for 4 hours straight I told her all the things that were going on in my life and I cried a lot and even Barbie got emotional too and she cried for me I can't forget that day ever 🙂 she told me "Don't worry honey! It's never too late, I'll enter void for you and after that you will be free of all this bullshit" THIS MADE ME SO HAPPY LIKE I WAS NOT EXPECTING THISSSSSSS :) she already did so much for me and still she wanted to help me out, this is why I call you my Fairy Angel <3
And next day she did enter for me and affirmed that I'll wake up in the void but in the morning nothing happened I realized that I didn't woke up there I GOT SO DISCOURAGED and I told this to her and she said that I have to assume that I'll wake up in the void unless it will not work 🙁 I literally Slapped myself for doing such a stupid thing Not assuming that I'll wake up in the void :( But she again entered for me and again affirmed for me Like? How can someone be so nice?
AND THAT NIGHT I DID WOKE UP IN THE VOID 😩💗 I felt so relaxed there, I was in a whole dark space I manifested everything that I wrote in my journal , I was beyond happy that morning when I woke up in my dream apartment the first thing I did after seeing myself in my dream house was that I messaged barbie that WE DID IT 🥺 !!
Y'all are very lucky to have my bestie here , I love you honey, ily so much <3 God literally sent you for me
Sending you so much love, hugs and wet kisses 🤭
~ your beloved 🎀
The most beautiful SUCCESS STORY I ever saw !
Thankyou bub for sharing your story here too ♡
My eyes got wet while I was reading this :) like you are so sweet and strong! ily too and I always will and no need to thank me..Your life was exactly like mine bef I entered the void , I also experienced all this bullshit so I could understand your situation that's why I helped you so, no need to thank me 💗 You should thank yourself bc everytime u felt like ending ur life , everytime u felt like giving up YOU made it through... so thank youself honey ! <3 I'M SO PROUD YOU MAHH BESTIEEE
You also played a vital role in my journey !
I've been through a lot. I have been through things that I didn't even told u . I have been through things that I haven't told anyone . Because of the things that I've been through, I used have an EXTREMELY hard time trusting people. I used to overthink abt how to talk to you and share my feelings without making you feel bad or you thinking I'm dramatic. I don't know how to talk to you without it being awkward but not only u listened me but motivated me also even when u r going through the toughest time in ur life.... Yes I have so many friends But you r someone special , I love you differently than I love my any other friend. Yes we've been through hell. And it's been insane. But still we are together! ily ♡
Idk how do I put my happiness into words :) I'M JUST SO PROUD OF YOU
Enjoy ur life to the max <3
Want me to manifest for you too?
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hischierswhore · 9 months ago
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Can you write about Luke Hughes being in a long-time relationship with a girl who is a figure skater, she goes to a competition where she wins first place and he is there with his parents supporting her, so a couple of days later when he is doing press someone asks him about it and he is like a proud boyfriend speaking about how he feels and how his family supports her too. Please, I love your writing.💕
gold medalist
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pairing: luke hughes x figure skater!reader
a/n: my first fic for an NHL player! i haven't written a fic in a WHILE so i hope this is decent. also thank u anon <3
You were currently competing in the 2024 World Figure Skating Championship in Montreal. Your parents sadly were unable to make the event, the biggest event you've even been part of. Luckily for you, your boyfriend Luke and his parents had come to support you.
They looked beyond excited to watch you perform, especially Luke, who had never seen you perform before due to his hectic schedule. They were extremely supportive and could barely contain their excitement during your performance. It was moving and you looked so elegant as you glided across the ice so effortlessly.
Finally, the competition had ended and the results were ready to be revealed. You listened and applauded as the other competitors' names were called for 2nd and 3rd place, which made the butterflies in your stomach even worse. You thought you did great, but you'd also seen your competitors perform, and you were taken aback by their beautiful performances, leaving you to think that you didn't place at all.
"And the winner of the 2024 World Figure Skating Championship is... Y/N L/N!" The announcer shouted as the entire arena jumped up with cheers.
You had not processed the words that just came out of the announcers mouth. You were frozen, your hands shaking uncontrollably as you stood in the middle of the ice. You snapped out of your daze, tears beginning to trickle down your cheeks as you took it all in. You did it. You did the damn thing.
"Thank you everyone! Thank you, thank you, thank you! I am so happy! This is such a surreal moment. I can't believe any of this is happening" You exclaimed as the announcer handed you the microphone and the judges had given you flowers and your gold medal.
Moments later, you were free to meet up with Luke and his parents. The second they saw you, Luke ran to you and carried you into his arms. He held you tight and kissed your head repeatedly.
"Y/N, baby, I'm so proud of you. I love you so much, don't ever doubt yourself" He said to you, his eyes brimming with tears.
"I won't. I promise" You replied, kissing him gently on the lips.
His parents soon approached you and they were both cheering as loudly as possible for their daughter-in-law.
"Y/N we are so proud of you honey! You deserve this, you really do. Congratulations" Luke's mother said as she hugged you tightly. She pulled back and wiped away the tears from her face.
"Now go get changed! We're going to celebrate tonight!" Luke's father added as he walked off to tell everyone else about your win.
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A few days later, you were back in New Jersey, seeing as Luke had a game and you had never failed to miss a single one since you started dating all those years ago.
Luke was currently doing press while you were at your shared apartment tidying up before you headed to the game. You turned on the tv to watch the press conference while you cleaned.
You were in the process of cleaning the counter when you looked at the tv to find your own image on the screen, along with Luke and his parents.
"Luke we have to ask. Your amazingly talented girlfriend Y/n recently competed in the World Figure Skating Championship and won the first place prize. What was going through your head in that moment when her name was called?" A reporter asked the 6'2 man, holding her mic towards him.
"Well, I just felt nothing short of complete pride. My beautiful girlfriend competed magnificently and did the most amazing job she possibly could. There was no question in my mind that she would take home first place, she deserved every bit of that trophy. I am so proud of her. Her dedication to the sport and hard work really paid off and it was very rewarding to witness. I'm so glad I got to be there with her to cheer her on. It's moments like these that remind me how lucky I am to have her" Luke responded confidently.
The reporters questions continued as he began asking more specific questions about your relationship and how things were between you two now.
You smiled when you heard him say 'my beautiful girlfriend', 'lucky I am' and 'her dedication'. You couldn't help but feel extremely loved when he spoke like that about you. He was so genuine, and it showed through everything he did and said.
"One final question Luke. We saw that your parents were there to help you cheer Y/n on from the stands. What did they think about Y/n's win?" The reporter then asked him.
"My parents were ecstatic. They had such an awesome time watching her compete. Mom couldn't stop telling me how incredibly happy she was, and dad said it was absolutely perfect. They know how much effort Y/n puts into skating, and they were able to experience that firsthand. That night was a special one, and they told me how lucky I am to have found someone like Y/n and be able to share moments like that with them. That will definitely be a night I'll never forget." Luke stated happily.
Once the interview concluded, you watched the footage with a huge smile on your face. You were feeling rather giddy inside as you remembered that evening, especially when Luke had placed his arm around your waist and pulled you close to him, whispering something in your ear.
Your heart skipped a beat when he mentioned how lucky he was to have found someone like you, and how special it was to share moments like that with you. You loved hearing how affectionate he was with you, knowing full well that not many men actually showed that kind of emotion towards their girlfriends or wives.
It made you fall deeper and deeper in love with him each day, despite the fact that you were already head over heels for him. It made your feelings grow stronger, making you want to spend every waking moment with him and wake up next to him each morning.
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TAGLIST
@lovelynikol16
if you'd like to be added to the taglist, pls leave a comment <3
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moutheyes · 1 month ago
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[translation] Nam Yoon-su interview with Vogue Korea
Original article link
(T/N: did this a bit quickly as it's been a busy week for me, apologies for any errors. once again i am but a longtime student doing this for practice and fun. there were some interesting bits in here about nam yoon-su's connection to go young and his experiences on set. i find his personality quite refreshing lol. also the pictures are gorgeous.)
No Pretense, Just the Truth: Nam Yoon-Su’s “Love in the Big City”
Oct. 20, 2024 | Son Gi-ho and Kim Na-rang
Today is Sunday, but weekends probably aren’t that special for actors, right?
If you start a job, you just keep going. That's when days start to lose significance.
You filmed Love in the Big City last winter and spring, are you working on something right now?
I rested for a bit after the surgery with my dad, and I’m preparing for a movie now.
You donated a kidney to your father this past June, have you recovered? Can you drink that coffee?
It’s okay as long as I don’t drink four cups a day. Smoking is the worst so I quit. 
You were appointed as the ambassador for the Life-Sharing Campaign. It seems like you experienced firsthand the value of organs and tissue.
I was interested in it before, so I searched up videos on YouTube. Obviously I didn’t know that I would end up donating my kidney. I could actually feel my body changing during the process. My skin became dull because the kidney couldn’t detoxify properly, and seeing people have trouble going to the bathroom gave me a lot to think about.
This will make a big difference in your life.
More than anything, it improved my relationship with my father. (laughs) There are three of us, all boys, and we didn’t get along well with him. But now we talk a lot.
Love in the Big City is based on the novel by Park Sang-young, and it’s widely recognized as a Booker Prize-nominated queer romance novel. Did you feel pressured by the genre?
I started modeling in my second year of high school (T/N: equivalent of junior year in NA), and there were a lot of queer staff members around, so I never felt that sense of difference. Everyone has their own world, right? I also had a childhood friend come out to me when they turned 20. We actually became closer after that.
How did you get the role?
I was contacted by the production company and met with the directors. There are four of them—Hur Jin-ho, Hong Ji-young, Son Tae-gyeom, and Kim Se-in—and I hadn’t met anyone before, so we needed time to get to know each other. Their directing styles are all different, but thankfully they all gave me the okay.
During the meeting, did they ask if you were okay with doing a queer romance?
Not at all. If I thought that way at all, even a little bit, the meeting wouldn’t have happened.
What kind of conversation did you have then?
They were unexpectedly curious about my hardships. Looking back on why we talked about that, though, I think it’s because I had to play Go Young from age 20 into his 30s. I had to show various emotions and character growth at all those different ages.
It seems like you’re right in the middle of that ten-plus year range for Go Young.
I’ll be 30 in three years. Episodes 1 and 2 tell the story of 20-year-old Go Young, but we shot episodes 3 and 4 first. It was better to film him in his mid-20s first. Director Hur Jin-ho made it comfortable for me while filming. It seemed like he placed a lot of importance on sound. Even after giving the okay, he would sit there with his eyes closed and just listen.
I’m interested to see how four different directors, working independently, will capture your image.
I haven’t seen the final edit yet, so I’m also curious and looking forward to it. I was only able to see the parts I later had to add narration for. Like the novel, there were a lot of parts I had to describe or explain.
Was there anything you had to keep in mind while doing the narration?
I couldn’t get caught up in the emotions and had to read everything in a similar manner, using a normal tone. That way it would be easier for the viewers. The emotions are already shown on screen, so if the narration was too forceful it would be hard to handle.
In an eight-episode show, you had different acting partners every two episodes (Lee Su-kyung, Kwon Hyuk, Na Hyun-woo, Jin Ho-eun, and Kim Won-joong). It must have felt like you were filming fragments of four separate works.
It was interesting because not only the directors, but the actors, staff, assistant directors, and producers all changed as well. It was a little difficult at first. On top of that, all the directors had different styles and wanted different things from me. I think that produced a more interesting result.
It must have been a big challenge for the actors.
Yes, it was a challenge. (laughs) One week it was one director, the next week it was another director, so I had to change my own approach every time. I learned a lot through that process.
Was there a wrap party for the entire production? (laughs)
Each team had their own gathering, but unfortunately we couldn’t do a big one.
While filming Today’s Webtoon, you said you were extremely sensitive because you wanted to do a good job. And because of that, you lost a lot of weight. How did you feel while filming this drama?
I’m fundamentally a sensitive person. Of course, I can handle it so I don't affect others. This time, my main focus was on showing the changes in Go Young’s expressions and speech as he got older. For example, he was more active in his relationships when he was younger, but as time passes you can see him slowing down. Also, he changes his hairstyle and fashion. But that’s also due to the directors having different preferences.
You started out as a model, so do you have any personal views about fashion?
Nope. (laughs) I go around wearing comfortable tracksuits.
Which of Go Young’s eras are you most drawn to?
While shooting episodes 3 and 4 with director Hur Jin-ho, there’s a scene where he goes running to the hospital after finding out his mother is sick. It was around the time when my father was ill, so I definitely felt a lot of empathy.
You were also having a hard time then.
Physically I was fine, but I couldn’t say the same about my heart. I became one with Go Young when he was in front of his sick mother. I was able to grasp the emotions, so we filmed those scenes without needing to rehearse. The emotions were captured really well, so we didn’t need any other scenes to explain the situation.
It must have been a strange feeling, having real-life sadness help with your acting.
To be honest, I just concentrated on filming the scene at the time and didn’t think about my father. Thinking about it later, I realized it was easy to express those feelings because of my connection with him.
How did you feel after filming that scene?
I don’t look back once it’s over. I just come right back to reality.
In a way, that’s a blessing. Some actors have to receive counseling to separate acting from real life.
You have to keep filming, right? You can’t keep clinging to just that one scene. Of course, the on-site staff takes care of you and asks when you want to film a scene where you need to immerse yourself in your feelings. That’s the degree of difficulty. But even if it’s an emotional scene, I brush it off when it’s over and go home.
Go Young is a lively and carefree character. What about you?
Even though Go Young is straightforward, there are still times when his heart aches. Although he expresses himself in his 20s to the point where it feels aggressive, he hides his feelings more as he gets older. I’m the kind of person who doesn’t talk a lot and hides my feelings, so I can be misunderstood. When I was a model, I was shy and cautious of my surroundings, and couldn’t even greet people properly. That changed when I started acting.
Now you seem very warm and comfortable with other people.
That’s only been true for a few years. The production company head even said I seemed awkward when we met, so they thought I wasn’t interested in the work. I’m more comfortable talking to others now, but of course, I don’t like forced situations.
Like what?
It’s often described as being “fox-like.” It’s better to be honest rather than pretend to like someone in order to look good.
The longer you see them, the better they will be.
That’s right. Most of the people I see on a personal basis are childhood friends from my neighborhood, but we can’t meet that often because they’re all busy with their social lives.
It seems like you got close to all of the actors in Love in the Big City since you’re all around the same age.
It was really fun on set. But I’m not the type to contact people that often; I don’t want to meet them unless it’s from the bottom of my heart.
Kim Won-joong, who also started as a model, said in an interview with Vogue Korea that you were really reliable and helped him out a lot.
He's a top model, but since this was his first time acting, he obviously wasn’t familiar with the process. Normally no one on set tells you anything in detail. I tried to make things comfortable by telling him about that kind of stuff. Not just comfortable for him, but also for me. I wanted both of us to do well.
There are a ton of skinship scenes. How did you want those to be seen?
First I got my teeth deep-cleaned and then I passed out mouthwash. (laughs) Male actors, rather than female actors, are recommended to gargle. I’d go, “Hyung, do you want to gargle?” and then we’d laugh at each other. Man or woman, I just want it to be seen as two people who love each other.
What was the hardest part for you?
Go Young has a bit of a daredevil streak, so he usually starts the skinship. There was a scene with eight actors that required over 300 takes. Each time I tried my best to make them comfortable, and it wasn’t as hard as I thought.
You seem pretty calm when you come across some kind of difficulty.
If I don’t deal with it today, I’ll have to do it tomorrow, so my belief is that I should just get it done. Other people tell me I don’t seem to get stressed out, but I think it just piles up silently. There are times when I’m fine and it’s a normal day, and then suddenly I feel it one night.
Even if you don’t realize it, your body will show symptoms of stress.
Sometimes I suffer from gastroesophageal reflux (GERD), but that’s my problem. I want to show everyone else a smiling image. 
I guess that’s why you smile all the time. Is it hard to keep smiling?
If I frown because I’m having a hard time, it’ll affect other people. Do no harm, right? It’s a kind of principle. A while back, I received a thank you text from one of the staff. It was long and said something like, “I’ve never contacted an actor before, but I was surprised because you finished everything with a smile even when things were difficult on set.”
Is that a recent moment where you were proud of yourself?
It’s more so the DMs I received from abroad thanking me for doing the show. There was one from a Brazilian person saying, “This drama is even more meaningful because gay marriage is illegal in our country, and I’ll be sure to watch it.” Of course, there are a lot of detractors. Go Young’s mom is a Christian, and I actually received a DM from a woman who is of a similar age that said, “Youngsu-ssi, I thought you were a good person but I’m disappointed in you.” But there has been a shift in the perception of queer people in Korea over the last 10-20 years, and it’ll continue changing in the future.
How did you feel after filming?
I felt strongly that we had made something together. We finished it while discussing how we could complement each other and making revisions. Also, there were fewer characters than in other productions, so the individual actors and staff could communicate more deeply. Although I was the one acting, I feel that the end result is something we achieved together.
Is there something you want to achieve before the end of the year?
I’m not good at setting goals. I used to make resolutions about how I should go about acting, but now I just work hard on every drama that comes to me. Rather than making plans for the future, the present is more important. This morning, I grated vegetables and then did some cleaning, and right now I’m focused on finishing up well with this photoshoot and interview.
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within-your-eyes-if · 7 months ago
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Phew
Hi everyone!
I'm excited to share that Chapter One's NSFW revisions and additions are officially complete. The core of the vice system is now implemented, and I’m meticulously combing through to polish any areas I might have missed. I've also cleaned up some coding, implemented object arrays to better track your piercings and/or accessories, addressed a few reported errors, and made several other improvements (go me!).
Progress on Chapter 2 continues; the NSFW scenes are still being refined and drafted. These revisions have given me a permanent: ಠ_ಠ (though I'm glad some of you still love the old stuff ♥) — but I'm steadily moving forward. After that, Chapter 3 awaits the same level of treatment.
Looking ahead, my next update might just be a call for beta testers — so stay tuned if you're interested in being part of the fine-tuning process!
Anyway, I thought you'd all like to know how it's coming along. I'm proud of the progress I've been able to make over the last few days. I promise I'm not rushing and am taking care of myself during all this! Thank you for your support and kindness!
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euovennia · 2 years ago
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Okay hi hello I’ve just binged your platonic Simon x reader headcannons and as an aspec person I am absolutely EATING THIS SHIT UP - Simon deserves someone to lean on and seeing him be vulnerable and care for someone like that and who will do the same for him makes my heart melt.
however, I am also a hopeless romantic and an absolute sucker for pain and the thought of Ghost catching feelings and being completely unaware of them because he’s barely used to having a friend let alone a crush; only realising after y/n does something he’d usually find stupid only to find himself completely smitten over it and him just going “oh. oh nO” and queue the internal turmoil because he has no idea what tf to do with himself and god forbid if y/n actually likes him back-
This has been plaguing me all morning and I cannot act right so I had to share it :,)
this can be a read as part of the bff ghost series i have going on, but i see it more as a "what if" kinda thing bc i strongly believe this man just needs a good friend. thank you for requesting, and as always, i hope you enjoy <3
warnings: nothing comes to mind, but lmk if you see something that needs to be added and i'll do it asap!
summary: ghost panics when he realizes he likes you just a little too much.
anon you're so smart for this because i genuinely feel like friends to lovers is the the easiest way for simon to fall in love
like there's already a deep, established trust there (in terms of being on the battlefield)
i mean obviously because if there wasn't you wouldn't even be on the team in the first place
but the trust he places in you on the field paired with the trust he has in you off the field?
i think it's safe to say that while this man doesn't realize it yet, he's already a goner
the meals you share, the low-budget hollywood action films you hate watch, and the unbelievable amount of patience he has for your shenanigans
basically, you two have become two peas in a pod (despite him not wanting to be in the pod in the first place but who cares he's your friend and that's all that matters)
and i genuinely believe of he were to start falling for one of his friends (aka you) it would be a very slow process, one that neither of you realize is even taking place
it would be the little things like you willingly making making the same dish two days in a row for your little meal times because he just likes it that much
maybe even leaning your head on his shoulder while you two watch those bad action films because, deep down, he loves knowing you trust him enough to feel so comfortable with him (bonus points if you end up falling asleep)
ordering him his favorite brand of loose leaf tea that he can never seem to find anywhere on store shelves
god forbid you memorize the way he prepares his tea and randomly show up with a steaming mug of it at random times of the day
as i said before, it's the little things that do it for him
but imagine doing all of those things on the. same. day.
like
you know he woke up extra early to help price take care of some paperwork and while he's doing that you stroll in a mug of tea
then later on when you see him for lunch he finds you made two plates of bangers and mash (sausages and mashed potatoes, it's a british thing apparently) despite having it the day before and when he asks why you just say something like, "yesterday you said you wished you could have more, figured i'd make more"
then later in the evening when everyone's retired to their rooms, you walk into his with the all too familiar box of loose-leaf tea in your hands along with a blanket
you just kinda set the box on the bedside table before dragging him to sit on the floor in front of the tv the two of you snuck into his room one night after price banned them after soap broke his and he was the one who had to clean up the mess
he totally saw you two sneak it in but never bothered to say anything because he trusts you
anyway
you flick on the tv and put on the third installment of that god awful 'sharknado' movie series you two had found out was a thing not too long ago
and all is well
until you lay your head on his shoulder and grab onto his arm as you look over his tattoos
he'll probably give you a little glance before turning his attention back to the movie, it's not uncommon for you to do things like this
but then he'll feel something cold press up against his skin and he'll look down again just to see you holding a colored marker and scribbling inside the lines of his tattoo
and as much as he wants to pull away and throw that marker to the other end of the room
he just can't bring himself to do it
not when you're pressed up against his side with your hands cradling his arm as if he was worthy of such care in the first place
obviously this night wouldn't be complete without you falling asleep against his shoulder, so that's exactly what you do
he lays you to sleep on his bed while he makes himself cozy on the floor :)
anyway cue him getting up early for his morning shower and the complete and utter shock that hits him like a truck when the marker you used the night prior to color in his tattoos doesn't wash off
he makes a bee line for his room and immediately picks up the marker you used only to find out it's sharpie
and while he knows that this would be a perfectly acceptable time for him to wake you up and chastise you for doing such a thing, he doesn't
because when he looks down at his arm he can practically feel his chest bloom with a warm, fuzzy feeling because you did that
and it's after he's stared at the colorful markings that now grace his skin does he realize he's got a small smile etched onto his face
then it hits him like a truck
he likes it because of you
he likes you
it cannot be overstated how quickly he grabs his stuff and leaves the room, not caring in the slightest that you're still wrapped up in his sheets
he doesn't do much work that day
just a lot of aimless walking around base as he tries to, in his words, get his shit together
because, in his mind, this is probably just about the stupidest thing he can do
and it's not even because he's technically your superior, that's a mess all on its own
it's the fact that either one of you could quite literally die at any given point while on a mission
and that's not even bringing up his own mountain of trust issues and insecurities
it's a mess
he's a mess
and how does he deal with this mess?
by avoiding you like the damn plague
you thought it was bad when he was trying to duck out of your pre-friendship interactions when you seemed to always be trying to find a way to bug him? think again.
he becomes practically invisible to you
his callsign isn't 'ghost' for no reason
i can honestly see it getting so bad to the point where you start to really only see him on group missions
which isn't too horrible admittedly because you always manage to squeeze in some small talk, but it's not enough
but one day, price calls the two of you into his office with laswell patiently sat waiting on a video chat over his laptop
and it's revealed that you two are being sent on a mission to gather some intel about some new terrorist group that's popped up on laswell's radar
and he just kinda sits there and accepts the fact he'll have to be paired up with you because what's he gonna do? tell laswell and price no? absolutely not
anyway
i imagine the mission going off without a hitch
i'm talking real simple, just a quick in and out before ghosts is on comms requesting an evac
that's where things go wrong
because you'll get some bullshit response like, "oh no, bad weather, can't fly like this, looks like you'll have to wait! get cozy!!"
and while you are a bit disappointed when he breaks the news, you can't help but feel a little happy because now you actually get to see and interact with simon for more than five minutes
but while you're over in your head having a small celebration over the unforeseen circumstances, simon is pretty much dreading it
he knows you know he's been avoiding you and he's 100% sure you're going to make him sit through an awkward conversation about it
and what's worse, he's certain you won't stop until he tells you why
well it's a good thing he knows how to keep his mouth shut!
at least he thought he did
because after having you ask him for the reason of his sudden avoidance of you for what he swears has to be the hundredth time, he just spits it out in a small fit of anger and annoyance
and i highly doubt he'll realize what he just said until he looks over to you after not getting a response and seeing you there with your eyes wide and jaw open
he'll definitely try to backtrack with something like, "forget what i said. you didn't hear anything."
and then your brain will finally kick in after going haywire for an unnecessarily long amount of time and you'll just kinda ask him in a small voice, "did you mean it?"
and as tempted as he is to brush you off and say no, he can't bring himself to do that
but remember, simon is still a very hurt man underneath that mask and heavy duty gear, so i can imagine him just letting out a small sigh before saying something along the lines of
"i'm sorry."
and your heart just breaks because you can practically feel the shame radiating from him as he turns himself away from you and averts his gaze to the floor
simon riley, perhaps one of the most hardened and strongest men you'll ever come to know, apologizing for the way he feels
you can't help but shuffle closer to him until you're sitting by his side
and you'll sit in silence this way for a while as he tries to ignore just how close you are while you try to find a gentle way to approach this
you're stumped
but eventually, your eyes will fall onto the floor and simon's gloved hand will come into your vision
and there's not a single thought in your mind before you're reaching out and putting your hand on top of his
the man practically malfunctions
he's sitting there, thoughts going a mile a minute as he tries to decipher what this means
but then you'll lean your head on his shoulder and he's almost startled at the way all of the noise in his head seems to just disappear
but still, he can't resist asking
"what now?"
and you'll let out a small, wistful sigh as you nuzzle your head further into his shoulder
"whatever we want."
he'll look down at you with an almost shy gaze, "and if i want you?"
and you'll interlace your fingers and punctuate it with a squeeze, "then you can have me."
and that's good enough for the both of you
at least until you get back to base
:)
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gotham-daydreams · 6 months ago
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Hi! I love your gothan platonic batfam series, but every time I read it I can't help but wonder what Duke's reaction to all this would be. He's one of my fave batfam characters, do you have any plans to add him in later chapters?
Just curious, no pressure. Hopefully I didn't come off as pushy. (sorry if i did)
Have a good day! <3
Hello! And you didn't come off as pushy, no worries :]
I'll be honest and admit that I have thought of adding Duke to the series- but if I was going to do that in a more organic manner, and just generally in a way that makes sense- that would've been in Chapter 2 or 3. Though trust me I am still debating... and the only reason I'm hesitating is because I don't think I'd be able to capture his personality, or really just him as a person very well.
Granted, I do inherently view yandere versions of characters as OOC for... various reasons (some of which are obvious, especially when it comes to the Batfam and DC characters in general), but I do try to keep very close to the character (or my general understanding and interpretation of them for things like DC, who have multiple canons and such) and write them in a way that does still compliment or adhere to parts of their personality or overall mindset... if only generally. Like Bruce and his closeness to those around them yet the distance he so desperately tries to keep - not for himself, but rather those around him. His strive for justice and to do good to make up for a sin, a fault that isn't his to forgive or one he hardly had anything to do with and so on. How that makes him inherently protective if only at a distance and in silence. How he tries to keep himself away from others, if only to protect them, and yet finds himself surrounded anyway. Etcetera etcetera.
Case and point- I don't have a really good graps of Duke's general character and aren't confident enough to write him into the Not Series at the moment- and by the time I do, it may feel shoehorned in and just not as great as it could be (even if a line I wrote in Chapter 1 was meant to be him..). Though I am learning more about him! And if anyone would like to share what they know and their interpretations of his character they have and such while I still have asks open, I'd love to read and see them :]
In future series', oneshots, and just general things I plan to post and share on this blog, Duke will very much make an appearance and we'll reach 10 yanderes for the Batfam instead of just 9. (Some series' which will definitely be longer than the Not Series.)
On that note, I have thought of how Duke would feel (and some others earlier on have asked a bit as well), and from the little I know of him, this is how I think at the moment he would generally react/feel (though it may be inaccurate and such because of what I mentioned previously 😅):
I think he would start out as one of the many others that actually live in the manor or just so happened to be there at the time — and that being he feels guilt first (unlike the only person in that house who doesn't/didn't) and just... wouldn't know what to do. The time passed and everything the reader has done sort of leaves him stumped, and just stuck processing until everyone's rushing out and around to find you and before he knows it- he's following out with them to do the exact same thing.
I think he leaves before everyone else, and considering that he does daytime patrol, it isn't as odd to see him out and about anyway. Though the frantic-ness of his movements and actions are weird, and for once, more outwardly, Duke panics.
He feels bad, of course he does, and more similarly to Cass- he can only wish that he could do things with out. That he wants to be in the room when you got your awards or had been there through the hardships he knows you undoubtedly faced without even having to see the medkit like Bruce does in Chapter 2. So he goes out to look for you, but not so much for your safety and more so to just... apologize. To say every little thing he can in hopes to make things better, to lessen the damage.
And of course, just to see you.
More than anything Duke wants to make it up to you right away, but has half a mind to know he'll have to take things slow. He's still sensible to some degree, if not only partially of half-insane just like the rest of the fam (minus a certain blonde and red head who are only a sliver of the way there), he knows it'll take time, that you probably won't forgive him right away. But that's okay! He can live with that, he understands that, but he just needs to see you. Just once- if only to see who you are now and the person you've become. If only to say an apology that might fall too flat or feel too empty considering the little he knows about you.
Just once. No matter how awkward it is or how much he regrets it later. Just once.
Though, despite that he is divided on bringing you home. It would be nice, sure, but by the time that discussion comes up he isn't sure that's the best idea. Even less so with how those that do want you home seem to want to go about it, and just generally the kind of people they are. Impulsive. Strong. Threatening- they'll scare you and do more damage then help ease tensions, and he doesn't want that to happen. You don't deserve that- even if he barely knows you. Duke can feel it, you don't. Even then, they help people out, not hurt them, not like they did with you.
Duke wants to spend time with you, but he's willing to do that outside of the manor if it means making you more comfortable and warm up to him a little more. As long as he sees you he can't complain...
So when Dick messes up, he's upset. Like everyone else besides Cassandra he doesn't know what happened but knows that something absolutely went wrong. Dick usually wasn't so obvious about things like that either, but with how hurt and just... broken he looks, they could all tell. Duke could tell.
Granted, he's not upset enough to change his mind, and if anything it definitely makes him more adamant about not bringing you home yet, but he can’t find it in himself to be fully against the idea, even then.
The one thing he wants to do after that, if anything, is more determined to make things right.
If Dick of all people couldn't make it up to you, then hell, maybe Duke can.
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animesimp-writes · 3 months ago
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YO, YO, YO! (Billy referred.) Hope your having a wonderful morning/afternoon/evening/night Mel! Could you write a Luffy x fem! Reader fic? Like They're making jokes on the deck of the thousand sunny while the rest of the crew is asleep, and Luffy calls Y/N pretty and stuff, and then confesses, saying that Robin and Nami told him he was in love with her after describing how he felt about Y/N?
If you don't want to write it, thats okay (bc I dont know if you write for other fandoms) but stay safe and stay hydrated! :)
-Anon <3
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# Summary ; Late one night aboard the Thousand Sunny, Y/N and Luffy find themselves alone, sharing jokes and laughter under the stars. As the conversation takes a sincere turn, Luffy surprises Y/N by telling her she's pretty and confessing that Nami and Robin pointed out he might be in love with her. Realizing his feelings are true, Y/N admits she feels the same, if not more. Before she can fully express herself, Luffy kisses her, sealing their mutual affection with a sweet and tender moment.
# Notes ; Heyy!! I LOVE One Piece, its my favorite anime for years <3 It's my first time writing a fic instead of headcanons ON TUNBLR so I'll do my best :D Also, yes, I am writing for other fandoms, so please don't be shy to request. And sorry for being away for so long, I just needed some time for school and I honestly forgot about this account and had to study since I'm going to high school in a few months. Wish me luck!!
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Late at night, the Thousand Sunny drifted peacefully under a blanket of stars. The gentle rocking of the ship kept the Straw Hat Pirates lulled in a deep sleep. Everyone, that is, except for Luffy and you.
You were sitting next to him on the deck, the night air cool against your skin. The only sounds around were the occasional creaks of the ship and the soft lapping of the ocean against the hull.
"Y/N, you know, I think I could eat a thousand meat skewers in one sitting!" Luffy said with a wide grin, his eyes sparkling in the moonlight.
You chuckled softly, shaking your head. "Luffy, I believe you could do it. But how would you even fit that much food in your stomach?"
He laughed, the sound warm and carefree, and you couldn't help but laugh along with him. The way he made everything seem so simple and joyful was one of the many things you loved about him. For what seemed like hours, the two of you exchanged jokes, stories, and silly banter. Luffy was on a roll, saying the most random things to keep you laughing. But as you waited for him to crack another joke, his expression softened. His gaze settled on you, and the intensity in his eyes caught you off guard.
"You're really pretty, Y/N," Luffy said suddenly, his voice quiet, but sincere.
You blinked, a little taken aback by the shift in tone. "W-What?" you stammered, feeling your cheeks warm as you processed his words. "Why would you say that all of a sudden?"Luffy rubbed the back of his neck, his usual confident demeanor now tinged with something more thoughtful. "Well, Nami and Robin were talking to me the other day. They said that when I described how I feel about you, it means I’m in love with you. And I think they’re right… 'cause I’m always thinking about you, and I like being around you more than anyone else."
Your heart skipped a beat. Hearing those words from Luffy, who was always so focused on his adventures and dreams, made your chest tighten with happiness. You glanced down at your hands, fidgeting nervously, trying to find the right words to tell him that you felt the same way. "Luffy, I… I feel the same," you began, your voice barely above a whisper. "Maybe even more than you could imagine..."
Before you could finish your sentence, you felt a gentle touch on your chin. Luffy had leaned in closer, lifting your head with his hand. Your eyes met his, and in that moment, the world around you seemed to fade away. Without another word, Luffy closed the distance between you, pressing his lips softly against yours. The kiss was simple, sweet, and filled with all the emotions you both had been holding back. Your eyes fluttered closed as you melted into the kiss, your heart racing in your chest.
When he finally pulled away, Luffy's smile was the brightest you'd ever seen. "I think I like kissing you too," he said with a chuckle.
You giggled, your cheeks flushed, feeling a mixture of joy and relief. "Me too, Luffy… me too."
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GAHHH!! I loved it so much, hope you guys do to! If you want more like this, drop a request in my "Ask Me Anything" hope you guys have a wonderful rest of your day, bye! <3
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hahaifolded · 3 months ago
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Can We Make This Work? (5)
Nanami Kento x POC!Fem Reader x Gojo Satoru (Masterlist) Chapter 5: The Arrangement (Previous) (Next) Summary: Nanami processes his thoughts with some help. You offer him a deal. Warnings: Angst
Nanami sat in his office, putting the finishing touches in his mission report. He felt a headache coming on as the weight of today was slowly getting to him. Today's mission with Ino was troublesome, as instead of the 2 second-grade curses that they were informed of, there were 3. Despite the two leaving unscathed, Nanami was irritated by the blatant error in information. That plus the needless meddling in his personal life and his subsequent blow-up, Nanami was just craving for this day to end.
But much to his dismay, a certain blindfold-wearing sorcerer barged into his office. "Nanamin, how's it going buddy?" chirped the older sorcerer as he took a seat.
Nanami took a deep breath to maintain his composure. "Gojo, I am not in the mood, so if you can please lea--"
"Do you want me to get rid of her?" asked Gojo, his happy-go-lucky attitude completely disappearing. Nanami felt the room get cold. He didn't expect the shift Gojo's personality.
"W-what? No... no. Why do you think I would want that?"
"Well, it seems like she's making your life miserable. And seeing that I put her there, well, I can just take her out," admitted Gojo. His serious demeanor didn't waver.
"No.. no. She doesn't need to be --"
Gojo stood up and marched towards Nanami's deck. "But I thought she was an inconvenience, always begging for attention, making you feel suffocated in your own home," reiterated the sorcerer, condescension dripping from his voice. Now towering over the 7:3 sorcerer, Gojo continued, "If you hate her so much, why don't we just get rid of her? You've already condemned her to death when you asked Yaga to give her more missions. So why not make it easier for everyone and just let me-"
"STOP!" cried Nanami as he slammed his desk. "I swear to everything, Satoru, touch her and I promise I'll never forgive you!" His heart was racing. He couldn't believe what the man before him was suggesting. Nanami did not hate you. He hated what you represented.
And much to Nanami's surprise, Gojo returned to his seat with a smirk on his face. "So.. if she's not the problem, what is?"
Nanami sank deeper in his chair. Am I really going to have this conversation with him? With an exasperated breath, he began. "(Y/N) is a good woman. She has been nothing but kind and respectful this whole time. She's made an active effort to get to know me... to try to make this union work."
"But?"
"But, it can't. Or more, I can't." For Nanami Kento, this marriage represented a life-long companionship, a promise to be there for the other till the end. But as a sorcerer who gambles with his life everyday, he couldn't faithfully promise that. "Everyday that I'm with her, she reminds me of the life I can't have. The life I can't give her or anyone else for that matter. She deserves more... she deserves--"
"Better," Gojo finished sorrowfully. Gojo loved and hated this aspect of Nanami's personality, his selflessness. "Kento, you do realize that she's in the same position as you. Worse actually because of you." Nanami flinched at that. "If you can't be there for her, who will?" And with that, the older sorcerer stood up and left the room.
Nanami hated that Gojo had a point.
-- -- --
"Oh, hi (Y/N)," the 7:3 sorcerer announced. He was exiting his office when he caught you in the hallway doing the same. After his conversation with Gojo, he realized he needed to do better. "You're done with today?"
"Umm, yeah. Just finished," you shared. You seemed hesitant to speak to your husband. You stayed by your door, bags in hand, almost waiting for him to leave.
"I just finished too. We can ride home together... if you want?" He knew you missed this as you always seemed down whenever you told him not to wait up for you. Your eyes widened in surprise after he finished his question. Nanami wasn't sure why, but decided to ignore it. Maybe she's tired.
You nodded your head and followed Nanami to his car. Instead of your normal chatty self, you were quiet. The missions are probably catching up to her. Tomorrow, I'll ask Yaga to assign her on less mission. Hopefully that helps.
As he left the school, he noticed the bags on your lap and recognized the logo. Trying to stir conversation, he asked if they're from that bakery he mentioned the other night.
"Huh?" you asked as you turned your attention away from the window and now to your husband. He asked again, feeling slightly bad that he interrupted you from your thoughts.
"Oh yeah. I went after my mission today, but I didn't have a chance to try it," you admitted.
"Great choice. I love that place," he shares. You just hum in agreement, letting the the engine fill the silence once again.
-- -- --
"Nanami, can we talk?" The question caught Nanami off guard.
After arriving home, you headed straight to your room, letting Nanami know to eat without you as you weren't feeling great. You even offered him one of the sandwiches you bought today. Now as he took his last bite, you suddenly popped out with such a weighted question.
Swallowing, Nanami nodded his head. He felt a little shy in your presence as he was still dressed while you had changed into your pajamas, a matching top and shorts set. Despite being tired, you still managed to look put together.
You took the seat to his side. You looked unsure, almost scared to have whatever conversation you both were about to have. You took in a deep breath and looked straight in his eyes.
“I know you’re not happy that you married me,” you began. Nanami choked on his food. He was not expecting that at all. You gently hit his back, helping him to not choke. “Hey don’t worry. I’m not mad. I completely understand why,” you assure him. You throw him a soft smile.
Nanami felt his cheeks warm. Fuck, I didn’t think it was obvious. It didn’t help that you grabbed his hand to ease his embarrassment. He should be soothing you, not the other way around.
You continued, “so I was thinking about it and I think we should open up our marriage, you know, see other people.” You dropped your gaze, shy now to look him in the eye.
“What?”
You let go of his hand and look up again. “I know, crazy but hear me out! You don’t want to be married to me and I just have to be married to a sorcerer here. So what if I somehow convince someone else to marry me instead? It might be a hassle but if I can say it’s love or something like that, maybe I can convince the higher ups to allow it. That way you can go on with your life and I can keep my end of the deal!” By the end of your spiel, you seemed hopeful, almost excited by the idea. Nanami hadn’t seen you this happy in awhile.
“Is this what you want?” At this point, Nanami had already failed you as a companion and husband. If this would make your circumstances slightly better, the least he can do is get out of your way. Even better, he could help you find a suitable partner.
“Yes.”
It seems like Nanami was going to help you find a new husband.
Word Count: 1255
Previous- Masterlist - Next
Author’s Notes: y’all, why did my heart hurt a little when I wrote this? I fucking love Nanami so much. Honestly having so much writing this little series. I hope yall are enjoying it too!
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leighaltieri · 3 months ago
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stu macher with a ghostface obsessed s/o
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request: Perchance stu x reader who's just like low-key obsessed with the ghost face case and talks Abt it all the time
warnings: gn reader, mentions of murder & blood
notes: sorry this took so long to get to you! i've been super busy with work but i hope you like it <3
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when casey becker and steven orth were murdered, you were fascinated by their deaths
you were always coming up with theories about who the killer could be
you'd share them with your friend group and occasionally they'd make fun of you
"hey, you ever think maybe y/n's the killer? i mean, c'mon, they're always talking about the murders! bet they're just trying to throw us off, acting all innocent and stuff!" your boyfriend stu teased
"yeah right. if i was the killer, you'd already be dead" you laughed, shoving him playfully
when you eventually got a call from the killer, you were excited but also kinda freaked out
"i've heard you can't stop talking about me. i'm flattered, y/n, really"
you wondered if he was one of your friends
you only talked about the murders with your friend group, and he somehow knew about those conversations
you looked out of your window and saw him in your backyard.
you waved, grinning at him
"i can see you!" you teased
he waved back, gripping his knife
"you wanna come in? maybe take that mask off?" you asked, half joking
he shook his head
"not tonight, babe. gotta keep you guessing. you'll find out who i am eventually."
he hung up the phone, and you processed what he'd just said
only one person ever called you babe
the next day, stu climbed through your window at night
"it's you, isn't it? you're the killer?" you said, smirking at him
“who, me? you've been watching too many horror movies."
"i know it's you. you called me babe on the phone last night"
"you really think it's me? ouch, babe!"
you just looked at him, a knowing smile on your face
"you know, i'm still convinced it's you," he teased "you're like obsesed with the murders, it's kinda freaky"
"you know it's not me"
he leaned in closer to you, you could feel his breath on your face
"what would you do if i was the killer? you gonna run away screaming?"
"is that your way of admitting that it's you?" you laughed
"i guess i'd have to help you out"
he looked at you in surprise "you're serious?"
"dead serious"
he looked at you for a moment, you could see the wheels turning in his head
"you're crazier than i am, babe" he grinned
"maybe i am" you stood on tiptoes to kiss him
you made out for ages
he stayed the night, your arms wrapped around him so he didn't fall out of your twin size bed
he's so tall
he loves how crazy you are <3
you helped him and billy kill everyone else
billy didn't trust you at first but stu convinced him to let you help
he thought you'd tell the cops everything but you could never do that to stu
stu is so so proud of you
he loves watching you stab the shit out of people
he'd rip his mask off to kiss you, pulling you close with his bloody hands
he'd get blood all over your face and clothes but you didn't care
you're the murder duo ever
billy loomis who
sid would never suspect you and honestly i think the 3 of you would stand a good chance of killing her
especially if she killed stu with the tv
you would never let her get away with that
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moments-on-film · 5 months ago
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Moments on Film: The Bear Season 3
Now that I have had a few days to process and fully…..digest S3, I am back with my most visceral thoughts.
I must say, distance did not do anything to ameliorate how I felt about this season. There were some beautiful moments, I really enjoyed episode 1, for example, and I truly appreciated the opportunity to learn more about how Sydney comports herself as a leader, Marcus‘s beautifully inspired and fresh creativity as a chef, Tina’s journey, Natalie’s inner struggles, and more backstory on chef Luca.
What I am having so much trouble with this season, is Carmy. I knew this would happen. I knew S3 would be the belly of the beast, as I predicted 🔗 here , but it was still so hard to take in.
Those of you that have read my work know how much empathy I have felt for Carmy. I have rooted for him. I see how much help he desperately needs and I am always hoping he will find a way to course correct when he gets off track. Carmy ditching Sydney in S2 and lashing out at Richie in the finale felt like a punch to my gut. I was so hoping those two relationships would be nurtured this season but in fact they got worse.
I want to be clear, I have had so much compassion and empathy for Carmy and his emotional problems, due to the cycles of abuse he has had to endure. What I absolutely cannot excuse or reconcile this season is how his behavior and actions are hurting, stifling, and traumatizing those around him.
Another thing I really want to uplift is that yes, this is a show that emphasizes found family. But at the end of the day, this is a business, he is in a leadership position, and everyone who works there is an at-will-employee. In my opinion, Carmy has completely failed as a leader, on all fronts. He has never exhibited leadership skills, with consistency. And as supportive member of the “family”, real or otherwise, he is nowhere to be found. Carmy has actually created a hostile work environment that is legally actionable and litigious with his mood swings, verbal and physical abuse and erratic behavior.
It is a stone cold fact.
I was rooting so hard for Sydney and staff to walk out the door this season. That’s how bad his behavior is. Sydney deserves better, plain and simple. Everyone working at The Bear does. Another point I want to uplift is that while Christopher Storer created the show, it is his sister, Courtney, “Coco” Storer who is the chef on whom he based much of the plot. Courtney has also moved from Culinary Producer in seasons past of The Bear to Co-Executive Producer and even “Story By” credit on this season of the show.
There is something Courtney said a few years ago on a podcast that has stayed in the back of my mind because I always wondered if it would be used as a plot point for Sydney. She shared a story of a restaurant she worked at in Los Angeles. She was promoted to CDC, loved her team and really enjoyed working there. However, it was not all perfect. She was constantly burnt out and at a physical and emotional deficit due to the stress. She suffered panic attacks. She also shared that she was not officially a partner with a stake in the restaurant, and she felt like she needed to have her own back because at the end of the day, no one else did. Although it was a difficult life decision—-she quit.
Forget Michelin stars. If Carmy cannot create and maintain an environment people want to work in, with him, he will end up completely alone. It also may already be too late.
I understand this season is apparently in two parts, I understand that everything happens for a reason. What I can’t understand is how I am meant to root for a character that has contributed to Sydney having panic attacks, has hit Richie, has yelled at Marcus during what must be the worst time in his life and who was about to lose it on Tina if Sydney hadn’t stepped in, saved her, and saved him from himself. Completely unacceptable behavior.
Carmy needs professional help. I have said this many, many times before and I am going to say it again. Carmy. Needs. Professional. Help. He cannot continue to let his triggers and emotions be his master. He is in a leadership position and people’s jobs are depending on him. He cannot offer any more hollow apologies, he has to back them up with consistent action, or I will continue rooting for the staff to leave or for him to step down.
If he doesn’t make the time, energy, and effort to stop the madness, slow down, take a beat, remember all of the gentle and beautiful mentorship he actually did receive through his rise as a chef, lead with his heart, build trust and repair his relationships, especially with Sydney, with Richie, with his sister and her new baby, he will lose it all, because he will have lost the one thing that truly matters, the people he is supposed to care about and the people who care about him.
Does he have it in him to turn this all around? At this point I am not sure. And if he doesn’t, I believe what “grows together”, and they really did, all grow—-will in fact, go together.
©️moments-on-film 2024
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