#and i also swear im writing
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forever cursed to write readers & ocs who would sacrifice everything, including themselves, to see their lovers safe.
#willow with eddie#aruna with astarion#there is no other ending to these stories#they would die if it meant just one moment of peace in the sun for the men they love#and it’s the way these men can’t allow it#the constant battle of eddie and astarion trying to convince them that what they want and need is *them*#there is always a trio#and there is always that third wheel who will have to watch helplessly as my oc loses herself/sacrifices it all#it probably says a lot about the way i love#the way i want to be loved#oh well#also i’m checking my inbox today i swear#and i also swear im writing#i took a break from posting my writing in june so i can get ahead in the fics
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not edited, just need to cup art donaldson's face while he fucks you. pretty boy would nuzzle his cheek against your palm. the second you begin praising him, he can't hold back the tears in watery eyes, feeling them slip down his face, staining his cheeks. the tip of his nose would turn pink, hearing his little sniffles while he gently bucks his hips up into you.
whenever you tell him he's good, or how much you love him, he hiccups out the most pathetic, sad, soft little "yeah?" while staring up at you desperately, needing your validation to live. pulling your wrist to his mouth, kissing up your arm, whimpering into your skin, squeezing his eyes shut as he lets more tears fall.
#his tears are a good thing#dont worry#he's just not used to being held and praised#you must cuddle him when youre done#also#i am so inconsistent#but i swear im trying to start writing again#sage's drabbles❣#art donaldson#art challengers#art donaldson x reader#art donaldson x you#art donaldson smut#art donalson x reader#challengers smut#challengers x reader
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ok I'm just gonna elaborate on my opinion that the remake of "Cloudy…with a chance of murder" is The Most Evil And Fucked Up Thing Psych Creators Could Ever Do Because Of The Bike Scene Removal y'all remember the "I've been thinking about getting a car" speech right. But let's take a step back and talk about the bike.
The bike symbolizes Shawn's freedom, independence, and in the "Cloudy…" it is implicitly taken by his own father ( which I'm letting go. for now), and in the end a bunch of people prepared to get it back for Shawn, but who gets there first? Lassiter. And it would be SO easy to play it off by having Lassie say something like "I got you your bike back so you could drive the fuck away from my police station", or "you helped me out before so I feel obligated to repay you, now we're even", but no. Lassie's reaction is genuine embarrassment when people found out he got the bike, because it was purely a nice gesture. A nice gesture for Shawn, whom he "hates". So what I'm saying is. metaphorically. Lassiter gives Shawn back all the independence and freedom, because despite all Shawn's antics, he sees him and accepts him for who he is, with all his bullshit, doesn't fall for his lies and literally embraces the deception and rolls with it for eight more seasons, with occasional Gotta Call Him On His Bullshit To Keep Him In Shape. This scene encapsulates the progress of the dynamic between Lassie and Shawn and it's the foundation for their future relationship, where they know they can trust and rely on each other, despite everything. So again, removing it in the remake was a literal crime against humanity and me specifically because it basically erases part of Lassie's character
#psych#psych tv#I'm gonna write a whole ass scientific paper about the significance of transport in psych i swear to god#bc obviously we have the blueberry that's tied to gus#and we have the car that shawn stole#WHICH ALSO THE CAR THAT INDIRECTLY WAS THE REASON LASSIE AND SHAWN FIRST SAW EACH OTHER#and the thing about Shawn's monologue with jules. is that he does get a car#which is also the car that he stole all those years ago#which again#tied to his first meeting with Lassie THEY ARE MEANT TO BE-#anyway#that car can be! driven! by! two! people!#and of course he drives it with gus. of course#but who else also gets to be in the front sit?#SBPD chief Carlton J. Lassiter#they are DRIVING. TOGETHER. THE CAR. THAT SHAWN GOT. ALL THOSE YEARS GO. BUT “ROAD” IS LIFE. AND THEY`RE TOGETHER. DRIVING.#DO YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN. DO YOU SEE WHAT I'M GETTING AT#anyway im done. carlton and shawn are kismet in every conceivable way ty for coming to my ted talk
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Not to sound like a boomer on main, because I love my phone- I do. But I really miss the day when I could hang out in public without having to hear everyone else's phones. I don't care if there are babies crying (because babies cry sometimes) or if other people are having conversations (because that's what people come to cafes and such to do) but hearing tinny little phone sounds blasting out loud out of their speakers drives me insane. I'm only in my 30's, why are you making me complain about how things were "back in my day" like I'm 80? Public phone noise is prematurely aging me. Send help.
#Complaining#Like an old lady#I'm not I swear#But also- Back in my day#*shakes fist at sky*#It's giving “Old man screams at cloud”#I am the old man#Only Im not a man Im a woman and instead of screaming at clouds im slowly having my sanity stolen by people watching videos on their phones#out loud in public spaces#Can we normalize not doing this?#Use headphones or something#Please- I beg of you#technology#cafe#coffee shop#writing#im just trying to write a fun little story i don't care whats happening on your phone#keep it to yourself
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doodles from varying times :] kicking my feet and giggling. put your hand in my cage youre safe :]
#hehehhe i love it when they get to be weird and scary (see: fucked up upsidedown chilchuck)#also the orpheus thing. hear me out okay.#how do i explain to people who dint think about chilaios about the endless trust and betreyal cycle themes. fuck!!#oh well it doesnt matter if i say it here youll get it soon cause im tempted to write a short meta for the two of them#clutches my head. YOURE GONNA GET IT I SWEAR!!!#anyways#chilaios#chilchuck#chilchuck tims#laios#laios touden#uhhh sure ill put it in the main tags why not#dungeon meshi#aaaand#[ tragedy au ]#if you can even figure out which ones are part of it HAHAHA#tragedy comedy
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im struggling to balance writing and doodling but im managing nonetheless
also!! i just finished writing myself a little list of events that will happen for the last half of the au, so everythings basically plotted out i just gotta take the time to write it coherently. pray for me
the first half i got to fuck around but now ive gotta take it seriously, so sad </3 but its okay cause once its over i can just doodle silly things about everything and even redraw some of my old concepts
double also... i mightve had an idea a while ago for a small spinoff... i might talk more about it another time...

oh and heres a scuffed reference i made a little while ago for Henry's ability if anyone wanted to know what it looks like as of chapter 6
#bendy#bendy and the ink machine#bendy and the ink machine fanart#batim#batim fanart#bendy and the dark revival#bendy and the dark revival fanart#batdr#batdr fanart#bendy au#batim au#batdr au#henry stein#sammy lawrence#buddy boris#twisted alice#cycle 360 au#im so excited to keep writing#ive been procrasting but i swear ill do it!!#also chapter 7 is already written im just waiting for my buddies to read it first#so that im not delivering you guys a steamy bowl of garbage
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seeby s1 dino gaang :)
#look i swear i can also draw atla stuff that isn't dinos#i just. dont have any ideas for that ahdnhsjf#HINT HINT INBOX OPEN SUGGESTIVE EYEBALLS LOOKING SIDEWAYS EMOJI#who said that#no but really if the dino au is getting me drawing again then fuck it#woe dinos be upon ye#yknow im trying to write a fic for it#it's not going well agejhdjg#but! there is zuko whump :)#so it's all i could ever ask for agjdhjf#atla#atla dino au#ALSO IM. please appreciate the bush the right of and behind sokka. it's so sexy i forgot how to draw bushes after that one
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guys im getting cloras hairclip commissioned and was just sent pics AND IT LOOKS SO GOOOOOOD!!!! 😭😭😭crying pissing shitting throwing up
I FEEL LIKE THE LEONARDO DICAPRIO POINTING AT THE TV MEME.... LIKE HEY!! THATS THE THING!! ITS REAL!!! ill never actually wear it myself but i love collecting cool and sentimental trinkets AAA (thank you to Joinhas on etsy!!) now i just need to buy these official harry potter plushies and my seb and clora merch will be complete
i wanna buy these and swap their scarves💖🥹 (this is what having dogshit selection of official merch does to a person LMFAO....sometimes u just gotta make your own...😔🙏) (due to request, here's clora's hairclip ref, in case anyone else is thinking about commissioning one!)
#i will buy those plushies eventually whenever i feel insane enough to spend $130 canadian dollars on 2 stuffed animals plus shipping LMFAO#which probs wont take long#Ive even considered looking for luna plushies and just drawing a mole on the cheek and pretending its clora LMFAOO#but yea ive never actually finished writing a longfic before so the fact that im gonna have an almost 600k word story under my belt#itll be nice to have cloras hairclip as a nostalgic thing/an achievement bahaha especially for when i move on to other fandoms#NEVER FORGET#MY WIFE CLORA IS ETERNAL#also unrelated but i have so many asks to get to i swear im not ignoring yall#choccyfanart
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I accidentally drew a fanfic idea before I've even started the fanfic.... it got a little out of hand
Anyway here's some stobotnik on a government mandated vacation ❤️ 💜 (feat. the Wachowskis trying and failing to have a peaceful honeymoon)
#stobotnik#agent stone#dr eggman#jimbotnik#tom wachowski#maddie wachowski#sonic movies#i swear im still working on metal & stone lol#buuuuut i also want to write this one T~T#PLEASEE fullscreen for quality tumblr hates art fr
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jhgnngggn i’m back to thinking about post-nrc yuusha and jamil--- extremely long ramble below prepare for uh angst??? i guess???

i buried some of these lore in the tags somewhere but anyways-
yuusha and jamil exchanged hair ties when they separated and went off on their own post-nrc as a way to "remember each other by".
they both have different plans for their own futures despite wanting to be "together"— whatever that means. yuusha stayed at nrc working as staff and jamil is out travelling.
at this point though they STILL never officially “dated” but oh they were so so close SO many times to putting a label on it.
“what happened then” <- idk man they’re incredibly stupid. yuusha is still horribly noncommittal and jamil is- jamil. (“…the hell does that mean” <- SHHHH i will not elaborate)
they ended as just "really good friends" (something something on they’re on the spectrum of queerplatonic but they didn’t understand that that was the case) .
━━━━━━✦
at first they did well keeping in touch from a long distance—
yuusha never forgets to check in on jamil, texting/calling whenever possible, she was always the first to initiate.
and jamil still would’ve made the same effort of course, but yuusha always beats him to it. he sort of just expected her check-ins every day.
and he looks forward to that 1-15 notifications that he gets as soon as he wakes up. it does get him going knowing that she was specifically thinking of him at the start of the day.
that wouldn't last though. eventually, the more yuusha met more people and cultivated new relationships, the more she felt herself grow further and further apart from jamil.
yuusha thrives on physical relationships and the majority of the time the only communication and contact between her and jamil is through the phone.
and so the messages from her became less and less frequent as yuusha got more absorbed and interested in her work and other relationships.
don't get it wrong, she still cared about jamil. loved him even, in her own way.
he just became less of a priority.
━━━━━━✦
it was bittersweet to think that jamil finally had the chance to initiate the conversation.
because that meant yuusha had been thinking of him less and he had to remind her himself that— hey he's still there, remember him?— although that's not exactly what he would say. that's a bit too antagonistic and petty. surely, she's just busy. right?
yuusha would respond as if everything was normal. but the usual fondness, the usual warmth, they weren't there. her words through the screen felt dry. forced.
she can use the unnecessary punctuations and emojis she wants but she is not getting past him.
they called. it was nice to hear her voice. but. there's the same feeling of detachment. why are they talking as if this was one of their first times?
yuu, what happened?— is what jamil wanted to ask. but he would also respond nonchalantly. as if everything was normal.
jamil still tried to reach out to her. similar to how she did with him.
but it was to no avail.
their interactions felt too far gone from what they had.
eventually jamil also realized that there was No Point.
if she wasn’t going to make the effort anymore, why should he?
━━━━━━✦
professor yuusha tala walks in to her class which her signature braid and feathered hair tie.
it's lovely having gotten used to working at nrc. her students are surprisingly behaved and she enjoys teasing chatting with her coworkers. surely she isn't missing anything, is she?
and the traveler, jamil viper. he's seen most of the sights, experienced a lot of things. it's like he is slowly fulfilling his childhood dreams.
he ties his hair with the same one he's been using for years. it's a surprise it hasn't snapped yet from how worn out it looks. this really belonged to someone so cheap, huh.
he wonders why he's still using it. he had come across fitting souvenirs that could replace it.
waste of money— jamil convinces himself. besides, this hair tie is fit for every occasion and it's still holding up anyway.
he'll just get a new one when this one finally bites the dust.
if it ever does.
it's really stubborn for a hair tie.
#[—✦ rambling#-✧ oc rambles#twst oc x canon#(💜) yuusha#(💜) curry noodles#postnrc💜#(<- new taggggg)#-✦—]#ougghh platonic/romantic breakups???#SILENT breakups.#awful.#THEYRE NOT FOREVER DOOMED I SWEAR;;; IM STILL THINKING OF THEIR ENDGAME AFTER SOME UH REUNION OR SOMETHING---#anyways- proofread once and im not looking back-#also i retconned my initial ideas a bit#bc idk how to make it make sense that jamil would be the one ghosting#surely i can come up with a reasonable explanation but i cant think of anything 😭#so i’mma make it yuusha’s fault- ty you absolute girlfailure (derogatory) 👍#i kind of notice my writing(???) bleeds into my oc rambling#but i feel like i can’t call it that 😭#which i know sounds stupid but still ack#the way i’d feel so differently if this was a low effort doodle instead#i guess i’d consider this semi-writing but idk if i still want to tag it as ‘my writing’#writers i salute you bc how the fuck do you put words together
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X-Men Yuri text posts so I don't start arguing illiterate freaks online









#emma frost#kitty pryde#ororo munroe#jean grey#anna marie lebeau#illyana rasputin#rojean#rogean#ororojean#jeanororo#emmakate#katyana#can...can i spread emma/kate/illyana propaganda...?#also rogean for my bookie moot#xmen yuri#i SWEAR im writing fanfic guys#jubilation lee#laura kinney
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Ok well i had the brief thought “what about an ER nurse Eddie au?” and then this popped fully formed into existence so fuck it Friday pt 2.. warnings for smoking and vague references to critically injured kids
“That doesn’t seem very healthy.”
Smoke curls up from the cigarette held loosely in Eddie’s hand. “It’s not, particularly.”
Buck’s hands are in his pockets as he strolls away from the glass doors out into the ambulance bay where Eddie is doing the mature, professional equivalent of playing hide and seek. He comes to a stop barely a foot or two away from where Eddie leans against grimy concrete. “Didn’t know you were a smoker.”
“I’m not,” Eddie sighs, “Particularly.” He looks over Buck’s face as he takes a drag, cataloging bruises and cuts. He hadn’t been the one to look him over before he was discharged, probably because he was out here avoiding having to do so. “Only when it’s- only after the bad shifts.” And only once a month, even if the bad shifts come again and again. He bought this pack in January, it’s stale as shit.
Buck’s eyes follow the smoke as it drifts skyward. “Rough one today?”
Eddie thinks he probably doesn’t have to explain to Buck that it’s sometimes better when a kid is dead on arrival so he doesn’t have to try his best to administer care he knows will be useless. He doesn’t have to explain a day where nothing goes right and he loses more people than he can save and he still has to walk away from someone’s parent or wife or sister, left behind forever in a waiting room on the worst day of their life, and go on to lose the next person too. Doesn’t have to explain why he’s out here, and not in there. “Mm. We’ve got this repeat customer, always hate to have him back.”
Buck’s eyes flick to his face before they settle somewhere around his elbow. “Yeah?”
“Yeah. He seems like a nice guy. I worry about him. He’s here too often.”
Buck doesn’t look up. “What was he in for this time?”
“Minor concussion. Bruising. Lacerations.” Eddie sucks cancer into his lungs. “Heard a house fell on him.” Exhales it into the night.
Buck does look up this time, eyes a darker blue out here in the shadows. “Part of a house. Just a staircase and the- like, the balcony, really.”
“Maybe he should stay away from those.”
“From houses?” Buck asks, half his mouth twitching into a smile.
Eddie rests his head on the wall behind him. “Guess that’s not really practical.”
“No.” Buck is quiet for a moment, one hand slipping out of his pocket and running through his hair. Eddie wonders what he looks like, when he’s not here. He’s more styled, sometimes, when things aren’t very bad. He wonders if he’s usually all gelled up and neat. Eddie kind of likes the loose curls. “I’m sorry.”
“For what?”
“Making your day worse.” Buck looks genuinely apologetic, and Eddie shakes his head.
“The guy made it out okay this time.” Buck is just close enough that Eddie can kick at his boot with his sensible orthopedic sneaker. “You didn’t even need stitches.”
“That’s good.” Eddie’s left foot is pressed along the inside of Buck’s right, and Buck is staring down at them. “His favorite nurse was on break. I would have missed you if someone else had to do them.”
Eddie laughs, just a few bursts of soundless oxygen. “You gotta find new ways to see me before something happens that I can’t fix.”
Buck moves, taking the few steps necessary to lean against the wall beside him. Carefully, he takes the cigarette from Eddie’s hand, holds it between two of his own fingers, and takes a drag. Eddie watches it happen like he’s monitoring somebody’s pulse ox, and when Buck coughs he laughs again, louder this time. “Fuck,” Buck says, laughing too. “Thought that would be cooler than it was.”
“Smoking isn’t cool, firefighter Buckley,” Eddie says, taking the cigarette back and pulling from it again between smiling lips.
“Hm,” Buck says, grinning out into the night. Then he sighs, and rolls his head along the concrete to look at Eddie. “I think there’s nothing you can’t fix.”
They’re very close. “There’s lots I can’t fix.”
Buck shrugs like he disagrees. “I also think I’d like to find other ways to see you.”
Buck’s eyes are even more in shadow at this angle, and they’re the color of the lake back in El Paso that he and a bunch of kids went to after graduation, drunk off beer somebody’s cousin got for them, skinny dipping with breathless terrified delight under bright constellations. “Then ask me.”
Buck inhales as Eddie exhales. “What time’s your shift end?”
“5:30 AM. So, probably 6:15.”
Buck traces the two fingers he’d used to hold the cigarette down Eddie’s arm. “You wanna get breakfast with me?”
“Yes. I would.”
Buck smiles, and Eddie snubs out the cigarette on the wall between them. “I’ll meet you here?”
“Alright.” He takes a step forward, then a step to the right so he’s standing in front of Buck. “Two hours.”
“Uh huh.”
He should really get back inside. They’re understaffed, as always, and there are too many patients, as always, and not enough beds, as always. “See you then.” He doesn’t make any move to leave.
“See you then,” Buck almost whispers. He leans forward, and Eddie still doesn’t move, so he presses a tiny kiss to the corner of his mouth for just a moment. His lips are warm. Eddie hadn’t noticed it was cold outside.
Buck pulls back and leans against the wall again. Eddie smiles, puts a hand in his pocket, and walks back toward the doors.
#my writing#fuck it Friday#i swear I’m going to finish trapped buck and Chris and work on proposal fic before i work on this more#but it would be a bunch of glimpses of Buck’s various hospital trips from Eddie’s nurse perspective#and maybe shuffle some events around? like maybe eddie still gets shot but by a disgruntled former patient this time and#so he does a stint in the maternity ward and buck shows up there#and Eddie is like you’re having a kid?#and bucks like no my sister is what are you doing here#and when buck gets the story he’s like fuck. shit. im sorry i wasnt there#and eddies like picturing seeing buck in that moment of violence and says im glad you weren’t#also Eddie could still be the one who restarts his heart after the lightning strike#this bit is maybe the last scene actually sorry for posting the end first#have a good breakfast boys#buddie#evan Buckley#eddie diaz#911 abc
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popping in randomly after almost an entire month just to talk non stop about the tsaritsa again everyone sit down.
specifically just thinking about the implications of tsaritsa's ideals originally being about love + the abandonment of those ideals to complete her goal of, presumably, destroying Celestia or whatever she's cooking up. to the point even her people don't love her and I probably don't even remember a time her ideals were of love. now it's all just ice and snow and cold.
which makes romantic fics w her even funnier because she's purposely removed this part of herself and suddenly reader walks into teyvat like they own the place (they do) and I can only imagine her reaction. angry, probably. because why you? what are you doing to her that's caused her hundreds of years of strict adherence to rejecting "love" both from others and to others to just. collapse. absolute shattering of her world and you probably don't even know it bc if nothing else she's good at hiding it. a lot of denial. tries to pick you apart and see what's makes you so different.
and oh she just hates it. she loathes it.
basically one sided enemies to lover trope because she can't stand you for a while but if you stick around she starts warming up to you and it makes it WORSE. so much worse. tries to distance herself but your just everywhere and it gets on her nerves because why does she love you? she isn't capable of love, not anymore. she thought she was.
g-d forbid one of the harbingers or PIERRO notices she'd never live it down. might even consider the implications of just killing you (she doesnt). worse if you know about it and act like a brat she will lose her damn mind
just the tsaritsa being an absolutely horrible mess internally.
#sagau#genshin sagau#self aware genshin#genshin impact sagau#self aware genshin impact#genshin cult au#genshin impact cult au#tsaritsa#i could also talk sbt furi here and how similar they r + how writing one of them influences my writing of the other#but anyway#ive been busy moving i havent had time to write unfortunately#but i do have time for tsaritsa! and furi. mwah#i just think its funny imagining tsaritsa trying to be polite snd cordial but ohh shes SEETHING. she hates you. she loves you.#she wants to kiss you snd kill you and devour you. a horrible mess of a woman who closed herself off snd suddenly she feels exposed#she hates it. wants to hate you but oh g-d you make her soft in the worst of ways. she'd destroy teyvat itself if you asked her to#shes like a cat you gotta work to earn her trust but oh lord when you do. velcroed to your side#she will say she despises you before kissing you so tenderly it makes you dizzy. between vitriol she brushes her knuckles against your cheek#longing and yearning so violently you will tear each other apart just to be closer.#is there anything so undoing as loving another so wholly it consumes you?#she swears she's indifferent but she pampers you and sends you extravagant gifts with no name attached yet it smells like her. you know.#oh to be in a horribly complicated relationship thats almost one sided enemies to lovers w the tsaritsa that consumes you both#like two stars wanting to be closer and yet..in doing so you undo each other when you inevitably collide. caught in an orbit that dooms both#this has been ur monthly tsaritsa ranting ur welcome and goodnight 🫡#when i say im crazy sbt the tsaritsa i am so serious. i AM her number 1 fan source me
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#i SWEAR i will answer the asks i got this just got into my brain and wouldnt leave lmao#yi knows your ip number#i was thinking in here they are around 3 years actually#we still got no canon knowledge on who is the eldest and who is the youngest but i headcanon it like#uno (oldest and will always let everyone know) odyn (second oldest and oldest middle child) moja (youngest middle child) yi (youngest)#yi isvery smart for her age!!!#she already reading and writing and dissing her brother look at her go!!!#im also not putting a read more on this one because the last time i did that so many people were yelling at me in the tags#to not put my stuff under read more#I LISTENED OK#HERE YOU GO#FORCES YOU TO LOOK AT MY SILLY STUFF#peepaw and babies au#tmnt#tmnt the last ronin#the last ronin lost years#tmnt uno#tmnt moja#tmnt yi#tmnt odyn#tmnt mikey#tmnt michelangelo#doodles#my art
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I'm smiling so hard at my current (and only) wip, it's so delicious so good I'm obsessed with it 💗 it's everything I want and need from an abo fic, it's unashamedly self-indulgent and just ahhhhh
I think it will beat Predators for me as the best fic I've written. Also it's gonna be the longest one. I know for sure some of you (you know who you are) are gonna be obsessed with this fic just like I am currently bc we share a brain
I'm so excited for you kittens to read it 💗 I'm smiling again agdjdjsllqhskeeieowjsqljswlwl
EDIT:: IT'S HERE!
#im tweakin cause ive just written the plot twist and im crawling up the walls#i cant even reveal the name of the fic cause it's a surprise#sterek#sterek fic#my fics#stiles x derek#eternal sterek#sterek fanfic#that feeling when you wrote something and you KNOW it's good#💖💗💖💗💖💗💖💗💖💗#im gonna be so annoying when this comes out#im at the finish line!!!!!!!#also I'm seeing posts and tags and i shut myself up so hard to not say anything cause I'M WRITING IT I'M WRITING WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT#i swear im sane
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Sleep thoughts
You know?
I was always confused when SJ immediately forgives and trusts YQY when he reveals the truth.
Nort because I don’t think the he wouldn’t immediately forgive him because as we know he would BUT in my (personal) opinion I think we should explore the broken trust you know? Because not only does YQY keep this very important secret (I don’t really blame him for that of course) but he also said things (wether intentional or not) to make SJ look worse (YQY with his foot in mouth syndrome) while making it look like he was in SJ side which he isn’t not when it matters anyway
Like ok let’s look at this from SJ perspective
You waited for your Qi-ge to come until you couldn’t Waite anymore already assuming he’s dead , working with the devil until finally you managed to escape , then then you see him. He looks cleaner , better -fancier- clothes , even healthy. And when you ask him ‘ why didn’t you come back’ he looks at you he looks at you as if you were an abandoned dog waiting for it’s owner to come back , and the only thing the only thing he said to you was ‘sorry’
Why? ‘Qi-ge is sorry’
Why are you just apologizing? ‘ I’m sorry Xiao-jiu’
Did you forget about me?
Is it because I would’ve pulled you down?
Why?
Why?
Anyway time skip your a Qing Jing disciple and your aiming for the top -maybe he isn’t telling you because you aren’t important enough? Well let’s aim for second in command! Then he’ll tell me- maybe then he’d also stop calling you that
And then you do
And he doesn’t -to either of those -
Instead he treats you like a troublemaker who just won’t listen , he never asks if you actually did it or not he just believes them , so now your just angry
Time skip again he tells you the secret of why he couldn’t come.
And.
And you don’t know how to feel anymore
You should forgive him right?
He did all of this for you.
But.
Did he do it for you or for Xiao-jiu?
Is he even your Qi-ge anymore?
Does he even want SJ?
Or does he only want Xiao-jiu?
Cause time and Time again he showed he never liked SJ.
#shen qingqiu#shen jiu#yue qingyuan#svsss#qijiu#I should stop writing these while half asleep#Does this count as Qijiu?#Idk why I even wrote this#I swear i like YQY#Im just the manifestation of SJ’s insecurities#Is it also obvious I read a fic with no happy end?
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