#and hopefully i'll be able to finish my other stuff soon :)

[soriastrider]

i've been drawing some valentines day dirkjake nonsense but at this point i probably won't finish it by the end of today. so here's some other dirkjake for now :) 💚🧡

[orcelito]

Me currently out of work and not looking for a job rn bc grief shit But knowing my tax return should hit in the next week (which will let me last like 3 months comfortably) and I'll have half of two life insurance payouts bc of my dad dying Probably within the next month or two (Maybe more, depending) so like I got money on the way, I Do, but I didn't work as much as I was expecting for my last paycheck so I'll be cutting it a little close for rent and such until the payouts hit so I'm like. :] cutting it close here man :] give me my money please :]

[genericpuff]

LORE | REKINDLED EPISODE 54 - BETWEEN YOU AND ME

Previous episode | Next episode

phew Episode 54 is finally here! I know it was only delayed by a week, but I swear it feels like it's been an eternity.

This episode was admittedly... really hard to get through. Not for any outstanding reason, just due to a lot of sudden IRL stuff that sort of piled up on my plate at the last minute and caught up to me. I feel bad for not doing more to avoid that plate from spilling over which resulted in this episode being delayed another week but I've been trying not to beat myself up for it too much. Thank you all so much for your patience and kind words while I worked through this hurdle. The good news is, I have an appointment booked this month for an ADHD assessment, so if all goes well, I'll hopefully be able to get on some medication soon to help manage the ADHD-side of my ND brain. It's been very unmanageable this past month and has led to a lot of careless mistakes and subsequent stress, anxiety, and depression that's been making it harder for me to have fun doing what I do, so I'm hoping things will go well on that front and at the very least take the edge off a little.

Anyways, that's enough personal dumping from me but I figured I owe y'all at least an update of how things are going on my end. Thank you so much for reading and for your patience through the delay <3 And of course, a huge thank you as always to @banshriek for being my creative other half in this project. As hard as it turned out to be to get through an otherwise very simple episode, it would have been even harder still to do it alone and so having them in my corner has been an absolute blessing to help carry the weight of it all and hold me accountable to boot. Now that the work is done, it feels great to see it finished, and has one of my favorite panel redraws that I've been looking forward to for ages in it (the scene of Persephone sitting on the rooftop!)

now ima go treat myself to some shitty bar food and play the rest of Dawntrail LOL

[kcamberart]

Development going forward

So in case anyone hasn't heard, Unity announced this morning that they're going to be making some pretty major (baffling) changes to their licensing plans and monetization. TLDR regarding the pertinent info (from what I understand. The company hasn't made another statement at the time of writing, and the FAQ is very vague):

They've removed the cheapest paid subscription tier (Unity Plus) completely, and are altering Unity Personal (the free one) so that the editor needs an internet connection in order to function. If you're offline for 3 days, it kicks you out until you reconnect to the internet again for the software to phone home. This is apparently not an issue if you subscribe to Unity Pro, the $2,000/yr plan.

If you publish a game made using the Unity engine, once it passes a certain threshold of installations and revenue, Unity will charge you a fee for every subsequent installation of your game on a per-month basis (and it's not per-purchase, it's per-installation. So (allegedly) if someone on Steam buys, installs, uninstalls and then reinstalls your game, or if they need to update the game, that's considered multiple different instances of installation and Unity will (allegedly) charge the developer as such). This will go into effect in January of 2024, but will seemingly retroactively apply to all games published before then as well.

If I've misunderstood any of this, please feel free to correct me.

I would not be surprised if they heavily walk back some of this (i.e., "the last time we announced something bad everyone got mad about it, so this time we'll announce something unbelievable and then say that we changed our minds so people will be more willing to accept the slightly less bad thing we wanted to do in the first place"), but it's setting a very bad precedent for using Unity for any future projects.

I'm currently weighing my options on whether to finish Vollema in Unity and then migrate to a new engine for future projects (Godot gets better every day, from what I've heard), or to just take what I've made so far and start over using different software. Honestly, it's early enough in development that the vast majority of what I have finished and ready to implement is visual assets, dialogue, narrative stuff and audio, so I'm leaning heavily towards testing the waters with a different engine. I likely also will not be able to work on or release any smaller games in the coming months for the time being (RIP 2023 Halloween Game, I'll make it up to you) while I make some decisions. Regardless, I'll keep you all in the loop.

TLDR: I'm likely going to be changing game engines, which will definitely set Vollema's development time back a bit (along with my other projects), but development in general will continue regardless.

Hopefully I'll have more positive news to share with you soon! I'm gonna miss my add-ons, though. Oh man, am I gonna miss my add-ons.

[the---hermit]

29|04|2024

In the end I chose to stay home this week and avoid the two lectures of today and tomorrow. It's just what is better for my mental and physical state at the moment, and as soon as I can I will be emailing the professor to ask her if I need to work on additional materials. I was planning on doing that today, but of course my uni has to fuck stuff up and momentarily blocked ALL student's email addresses so I have no way to communicate with the professor until the end of this week. I can't even use another email because the uni email addressess cannot recieve emails from the outside it's a nightmare. WIth this being said my mood was a bit better today and I was also more productive than expected so I am happy about that. Not only I finished my reread of the play, but I also found so many (too many) sources to use for my paper. I also organized said sources and starting tomorrow I will read and annotate them which hopefully won't take too long. I cannot wait to get to the writing part because that will mean I will be close to the end, and I'll be able to move on to other tasks. As for non uni related things I am in a book limbo since yesterday I finished what I was reading and I haven't picked up my next fiction read, and I have no idea what to pick.

today's productivity:

read first thing in the morning (and since I haven't picked yet my next novel I started the day with an historical essay which is great but not necessarily how i'd like to start my days)

finished rereading and annotating The Merchant Of Venice

looked for new sources for my English lit paper (so far I have 17 sources including two books, ya kid has a lot to work on rn)

organized the sources I found and created an attack plan (yes that is how I am calling my study organization)

worked on my cross stitch project

daily Irish review on duolingo

📖:L'Idea Di Medioevo by Giuseppe Sergi, The Merchant Of Venice by Shakespeare

[mcntsee]

Letters to her

prologue

summary: kaz’s letter to y/n throughout the years.

warnings: Kaz’s past is kinda mentioned, mentions of death, cursing

note: I tried to express kaz’s feelings and growth with every start and finish of all the letters, hopefully you guys understand it too. I added a little something at the end, hope you enjoy! <3333

first letter:

Deer y/n

My da said you can came come play wheneber you want to come play with my me again can you please come play with me soon pleas?

I miss you and Jordie miss and da and the little kitteny miss you we all misses you very much

Love Kaz!

(I drawed a pist picture of you and me and spots playing)

2nd letter

Dear Y/N,

I hope you're doing okay. I wanted to say a big thank you for being there when we said bye to my da. It made me feel better knowing you were there, even though it was kinda sad.

Guess what? Jordie said we're gonna move to Ketterdam. He says it's cause he wants me to go to a good school there. I'm not sure about leaving this house, but Jordie says it'll be good for us.

The cool part is that you live in Ketterdam! That means we can hang out more and play together. Remember when we used to build forts in the living room and pretend we were pirates? Maybe we can do that in Ketterdam too.

I'll miss this house a bit because it's where we played hide and seek and had ice cream parties, but I think Ketterdam will be fun too. And I'm really happy cause we'll get to see each other more often!

I will see you soon, okay?

Love, Kaz!

3rd letter

Dear y/n,

I'm really, really sorry I haven't come to see you yet. It's not 'cause I don't want to, I promise. You're still my bestest friend ever. It's just that things got a little crazy since we arrived.

Jordie met this guy named Jacob Hertzoon. And guess what? Jacob offered us a whole bunch of money for our house! Jordie said it's a really good thing 'cause we can use the money for important stuff. But it also means we're super busy.

I didn't want you to think I forgot about you or anything. I miss you a lot and I still want to see you and play together. Maybe once we're all settled in our new place and get the money, we can have a big adventure like we used to.

Thanks for being the best friend ever. I promise we'll hang out soon, okay?

Love, Kaz!

4th letter

Y/N,

Are you okay? Please write back! Jordie is gone. I need to know you're alive.

Kaz.

5th letter

Y/N,

I heard you went on quite the journey to Shu Han just to retrieve my cane. I assume the trip was bearable. Your efforts are appreciated.

It's curious how life unfolds, isn't it? One day we're children playing in the streets, the next we're scattered across the world for various reasons. Yet, here we are, still connected by some thread of familiarity.

I imagine you'll return from your expedition when the time is right. Until then, business with the dregs continues as usual. The city keeps turning, and so do its dealings. As for me, well, I have my own matters to attend to as soon as I’m able to walk again.

- K.B.

First note

Get well soon! Let me know if you need anything else.

- Love, Y/n!

6th letter

Y/N,

Your letter reached me, and I must admit, it contained more substance than I anticipated. Word travels fast in the Barrel, and it seems that Haskell has taken quite an interest in your recent endeavors. His words carry weight, though they seldom come without a price.

If his assessment holds true, and you manage to prove your worth in the upcoming job, it could indeed elevate you within the ranks. Haskell’s recognition of your potential is both promising and concerning. The higher one climbs, the more treacherous the fall can be.

In the midst of this, know that I await your return.

May you navigate these challenges with the same tenacity that has carried you thus far. I wish you the best of luck, Y/N. Tread carefully.

- K.B

7th letter

Y/N,

You certainly have a talent for uncovering promising recruits. Jesper Fahey. The word on the street is that he’s got a steady aim that’s worth noticing. The skills he possesses could indeed be valuable, particularly in the line of work we find ourselves engaged in.

However, I must tread cautiously when it comes to individuals entangled in debts and vices. Jesper Fahey, from what I’ve heard, is no stranger to gambling. His tendency to wager recklessly has garnered quite a reputation, one that isn’t entirely favorable. The loyalty of a man buried under the weight of debts is a precarious matter. Whether his skills can outweigh the burden of his choices remains to be seen.

Your perspective on recruits is valued, and I’ll certainly keep a watchful eye on Fahey. I trust your judgment, and I’m willing to entertain the possibility. In the midst of all this, remember that your return is anticipated and your presence missed.

Return safely,

K.B.

8th letter

Y/N,

Do you remember Jesper? It’s almost comical how, after discussing him in my last letter, fate seemed to conspire to validate our conversation. Not long after I sent those words to you, I found myself intervening to prevent Jesper from getting himself thoroughly thrashed due to his gambling debts.

I hope I’ve made the right call by extending a hand to Jesper. It’s a calculated risk, one that I’m hoping will pan out in our favor. There’s potential there, no doubt, but potential doesn’t always translate into reliability.

This letter is short, I know, but I will tell you more about it when you come back.

Stay safe,

K.B

9th letter

Y/n,

It’s been days since your last communication, and the weight of uncertainty presses heavily on me. The quiet absence of your presence has stirred an unease I’m not accustomed to.

I’ve seen you handle insane odds, and I know you’re more than capable. But here I am. My mind keeps wandering to places I’d rather it not go, imagining scenarios that could have unfolded, and none of them are sitting well with me.

I hope that this silence is a result of strategic detachment, that you’re immersed in the intricacies of the job and haven’t had a moment to spare for correspondence.

I’m not accustomed to this vulnerability, nor do I care for it. Yet, here I am, plagued by the absence of information. I ask you, if you’re able, to dispel this uncertainty. A simple message, a token of reassurance – anything to quell this rising tide of apprehension.

I await word from you with an intensity I hadn’t thought possible. May it come soon.

Expectantly,

K.B

10th letter

Y/N,

I received the coat you sent, and I must admit, it's a rare occasion when I'm at a loss for words. It's unlike anything I would've chosen for myself, yet somehow, it feels surprisingly fitting. I can't deny its utility either – I appreciate it.

Jesper and Nina have managed to cultivate a special talent for driving me to the brink of exasperation. Their camaraderie is both amusing and bewildering, a chaotic symphony that I'm still attempting to decipher.

Today was no different. Jesper's antics at the club bordered on audacious, and Nina's unbridled laughter was enough to turn heads in our direction. As I tried to navigate the sea of chaos they create, I found myself, unusually, yearning for a return to some semblance of normalcy.

I must confess, the prospect of your return holds an allure I hadn't anticipated. There's a steadiness in your presence, an understanding that's often a rare commodity in these tumultuous times. The chaos, the hustle – they feel more manageable when you're around.

Till then, I'll persevere in the sea of antics that Jesper and Nina stir up, counting down the days until your return.

Until then,

Kaz

11th letter

Y/N,

Your mention of the jurda parem caught my attention, no doubt about it. It’s a name that carries weight, and I’ve got a feeling we’re treading on some dangerous ground here. It’s the kind of thing that’s best left untouched until we’ve got a better handle on what it entails.

Listen, I won’t preach, but I’ve got to say it – be careful and keep an eye out for trouble. The city’s not known for being kind to those who don’t tread carefully, and I’d hate to see you caught in something you didn’t see coming.

I’ve got a job for you. One that’s right up your alley. It’s always better discussing these things face to face, so when you can, make your way back. The sooner, the better.

Until then,

Kaz

12th letter

Y/N,

I’ve never been one for words, as you well know. My tongue seems to have a mind of its own, often saying the wrong things at the wrong time. And when it comes to matters like these, I’ve found that my eloquence takes a swift exit.

So, here I am, writing this letter in hopes that the words come out right, that they somehow capture what I’m feeling. I’ve spent years navigating the intricacies of this city, and yet the complexities of my own emotions have managed to elude me.

I’ve always valued our connection, from those early days of childhood mischief to the present. You’ve been a constant in my life, someone whose presence brings a sense of order to the chaos that surrounds us. And somewhere along the way, that bond transformed into something deeper, something I’ve been grappling with.

I find myself wanting to say more, to articulate the thoughts that remain half-formed in my mind. But it’s difficult, Y/N, and this letter might be the best I can manage.

What I’m trying to say is that you’ve become more than a friend, more than a partner in crime. There’s a depth to my feelings that I’m only beginning to understand. And if I’m being truly honest, I’d like to explore where this path might lead.

I understand if you need time, if my sudden candor is a lot to process. But I wanted to put these thoughts down, to let you know where my heart is at. And if you’re open to it, if you’ve felt even a fraction of what I’ve been feeling, then maybe we can navigate this new terrain together.

Kaz.

Second note

I’d like to explore where this path might lead too.

Love, y/n!

13th letter

Y/N,

I can't thank you enough for stepping in when I couldn't. I hope the contractor in Lij wasn’t hard to handle.

Now, I have a proposal of a different kind. How about we put our skills to use in a more relaxed setting? I'd like to take you out to dinner. No heists, no secret dealings, just you and me, navigating the menu instead of the back alleys.

I've made reservations for us at a place that's a bit more reputable than the Barrel's taverns. Consider it a step toward normalcy, a chance to enjoy an evening without looking over our shoulders.

Looking forward to your return,

Kaz

14th letter

Dear Y/N,

Your letter reached me, and I've got to say, the way you put it into words – how much you miss me – it hits home. The distance is a constant reminder of the warmth I've grown accustomed to, and I find myself missing you more than I thought possible.

This job is driving me insane, and my thoughts often wander back to Ketterdam, back to you. It's like a pull, a magnetic force that tugs me back to the life we've been building together.

I bought something with me – a box of those chocolates you can't seem to get enough of. The catch? I'm hoping they survive the journey and don't turn into a gooey mess.

I want you to know that with every sunrise and sunset that passes, I'm getting more restless to return to the city that's been our canvas, our backdrop. Until then, my thoughts are with you, and I'm eagerly counting down the days until I can wrap my arms around you again.

With all my longing,

Kaz

3rd note

I apologize, it seems the chocolates didn’t fare too well. I hope they’re still somewhat salvageable and that they manage to satisfy your sweet tooth.

- Kaz

15th letter

Dear Y/N,

I hope this letter finds you on the mend, wrapped in warmth and taking good care of yourself. It pains me to know you're unwell while I'm away, unable to offer even the smallest comfort.

My love, get well soon. I miss your laughter, your presence – they're a part of my life I can't bear to be without for long. The distance feels heavier when I know you're not well.

Today, during the heist, I saw a small brown cat with delicate white spots. The sight of it was like a reminder of simpler times, of moments when things were less complex. It stirred memories of my old cat "Spots," whose antics used to provide a reprieve from the realities of the Barrel.

As I look around, I find myself yearning for the day when I'll return to Ketterdam. Until then, my thoughts are with you, my love. Rest well, recover soon, and know that I will be there soon.

With all my affection,

Kaz

16th letter

Dearest Y/N,

There are times in life when words are inadequate, when even the most eloquent phrases fall short of capturing the depth of one's emotions. Today is one such day, and I find myself grappling with a sentiment that defies my usual precision.

I love you, Y/N. There, I've said it, though the words seem almost insufficient to convey the weight of my feelings. You've woven your presence into the very fabric of my being, and I find that I'm navigating uncharted territory, stumbling upon emotions that have long remained dormant.

In a world marked by uncertainties, you've become my constant, the one I turn to when the winds of the Barrel grow fierce. I cherish our bond, our shared history, and the future we're forging together.

As the days pass, my conviction only grows stronger. You've touched a part of me I thought was unreachable, and I find myself grateful for the warmth you've brought into my life.

Love,

Kaz

4th note

I love you too, more than words can express.

- Love, y/n!

17th letter

My Love,

I've stumbled upon something while on my trip to Lij, a revelation that caught me by surprise. My old house is up for sale. I confess, it's a notion that's been hovering in the back of my mind, a possibility I've been toying with.

And then, as if fate had a hand to play, it occurred to me – what if we made it our own? Y/N, would you consider it? The thought of creating new memories in a space that's intertwined with my past is something that holds a certain allure. A place where we could carve out our own sanctuary, away from the schemes and chaos that surround us.

If this notion speaks to you, let me know. It's a step I'd only take with you, a shared decision that would mark a new chapter in our journey together.

Love,

Kaz

18th letter

This is to certify that Y/N L/N and Kaz Brekker is (are) now registered as the absolute proprietor(s) of the land comprised in the above-mentioned title, subject to the entries in the register relating to the land and to such of the overriding interests set out in section 30 of the Registered Land Act as may for the time being subsist and affect the land.

Kaz Brekker __________

19th letter

My love Y/N,

I hope this letter finds you in good spirits, even though I’m far away in Shu Han. I wanted to share something with you – I stumbled upon the perfect dining table. It’s a piece that seems to embody the essence of what we’ve built together, a symbol of the life we’re crafting, even from a distance.

As I stand here, thousands of miles away, my thoughts are never far from Ketterdam, from you. Every corner of the city is a reminder of our shared journey, of the future we’re molding. And with every passing day, I find myself longing to return, to be by your side again.

The plans we’ve made, the dreams we’ve spun – they’re a driving force, propelling me forward through the challenges that Shu Han presents. I promise you, Y/N, I’ll be back soon enough.

Until then, know that you’re in my thoughts, my heart, every moment of the day.

With all my affection,

Kaz

20th letter

Love,

I’ve come across some interesting information that might be of use to you. It seems that there’s a rumor circulating about a certain merchant in the Fifth Harbor. This merchant, it’s said, has been trying to make deals with both the Merchants Council and the Whitecrows, something that has my interest piqued.

I’ve also managed to uncover some details about a potential source of counterfeit currency that might be making its way into the hands of certain unsavory individuals. The source, surprisingly, seems to be tied to a printing press hidden away in the Barrel. It’s a curious development, one that could have far-reaching consequences.

And finally, I’ve received word that a shipment of goods has gone missing from a storage warehouse near the docks. This might not seem significant at first glance, but it’s the timing that intrigues me. A missing shipment, coupled with the merchant’s deals and the counterfeit currency – it’s all connected, I’m certain of it.

Stay vigilant, stay cautious. And know that even in the midst of our separate tasks, you’re in my thoughts.

I miss you, and I love you.

Love,

Kaz

21st letter

Y/N,

Listen to me, and listen carefully. You need to come back to Ketterdam, now. What you walked into, it was a trap – calculated, deliberate. I can’t explain it all in this letter, but trust me when I say your safety is in jeopardy.

I don’t care what you’re in the middle of, what plan you’re executing – drop it, and make your way back. I can’t lose you, not now, not like this. The threat is real, and the longer you stay where you are, the more danger you’re in.

I’m begging you, Y/N, hurry back. We can sort through the details, I’ll explain everything, but right now, all that matters is your safety. Don’t delay, don’t second-guess. Just come back.

Kaz

22nd letter

Love,

I’m pleading with you, begging you to reach out, to let me know you’re safe. This silence, it’s a torment I can’t bear. Every thought is tinged with worry, and I find myself grappling with scenarios that are far too grim.

I don’t care about the details, the reasons – they pale in comparison to my overwhelming need to know you’re okay. We’ve faced down darkness together, navigated treacherous waters, and I can’t accept the idea of you being lost in the midst of it all.

Please, Y/N, come back to Ketterdam. If you’re reading this, if you’re anywhere, find a way to let me know you’re alive. I’ll make sense of the rest later. Just, my love, come back to me.

Kaz

23rd letter

Y/N,

I can’t wait any longer. The silence is a weight on my chest, a suffocating reminder of the unknown. I’ve agonized, I’ve begged, and still, there’s no word from you. It’s time I take matters into my own hands.

Please, hold on. I’m coming. I hope you’re okay, I hope you’re just out of reach, waiting for me to catch up. It’s a risk I have to take.

I love you.

Stay strong, my love. I’m on my way.

24th letter

My Dearest Y/N,

It's been a week since you left us, a week of darkness and aching emptiness that nothing can fill. I know you won't get this letter, that these words will remain suspended in the void, but I find myself needing to put them down, needing to release the feelings that have taken hold of me.

The pain is suffocating, a weight that's settled into my bones. I still can't grasp the reality, can't accept that you're gone, that your light has been extinguished. It's a void that stretches beyond comprehension, a void I'm stumbling through.

The memories are a double-edged sword. They're a balm, a reminder of the moments we shared, of your laughter, your warmth. But they're also a blade, a reminder of what's been taken from us, of the future that was stolen away.

I want you to know, even though you'll never read these words – I love you. I always have, and I always will. You were more than a partner, more than a confidant. You were my anchor, my solace, my reason to keep pushing forward.

It's impossible to fathom life without you, Y/N. Your absence leaves a void that can never be filled. I can only hope that wherever you are, you're at peace, free from the pain that's gripped my heart.

Until we meet again, my love,

Kaz

25th letter

My dearest Y/N,

Six months have passed, and the ache of your absence has only deepened. The city, our city, is a different place without you. The crows, the ones you brought together, are slowly finding their separate paths, their separate destinies. It's as if the world itself is reshaping in your absence.

I found the little box where you kept all those letters. Your letters, my words – I'm surprised, in a way, that you kept them all. It's a piece of you that I'll treasure forever.

It's in these moments of solitude that I find myself yearning for your presence the most. Your laughter, your insights – they're still very much alive in my memories, and they continue to guide me through the labyrinthine twists of this world.

I miss you, Y/N. More than words can say. The void you left behind is as vast as the Barrel itself, and there's a hollowness that's impossible to fill. I can only hope that, wherever you are, you've found the peace that eluded you in life.

Until the next time we meet, my love,

Kaz

26th letter

My Dearest Y/N,

Time has continued its relentless march, and two years have slipped through my grasp since you left us. The city, once our canvas, has taken on a different hue, a different weight. The crows have scattered, their paths diverging, and the life we built together feels like a distant memory.

I wanted to share something with you – I've made a decision about the house, the one that once held the echoes of our shared history. It's a decision born out of the reality that without you, it's ceased to be a home. The walls, the rooms – they're empty without your presence, and it's a stark reminder of what's been lost.

Putting it up for sale again, it's not just about letting go of a physical space. It's about acknowledging that our time together, our shared moments, live on in memories, not in bricks and mortar. I carry you with me, always, but it's time to release the hold the house had on me.

Life continues to move forward, though it's a path I tread with a shadow that can never be dispelled. I hope, wherever you are, you've found the peace that eluded you in life. And I hope, wherever I am, you're watching over me, your presence a guiding light through the darkness.

With a heart full of love,

Kaz

27th letter

My dearest,

It's been almost three years, and some days it feels like it was just yesterday when I last saw you. I miss you, fuck, I miss you so much. It's like this gaping hole, this emptiness that can't be filled. No matter how many schemes I plan, no matter how many crows I put to work, it's like there's this void that's always there.

I was gonna do it, you know? I was gonna ask you. I got this ring, this small little thing that I bought just a month before you fucking died. It's funny, you know, I never thought I'd be the one to feel this way, to want something that much, to want to stake a claim in this shithole of a world.

But I guess that's what you did to me. You turned this cold, calculating schemer into someone who wanted more, who wanted you. I'm sorry I didn't ask you sooner, that I waited, that I let time slip through my fingers like sand. I'm sorry I couldn't be the one you deserved.

You were my light, Y/N. You shined a light into my darkest corners, and now that you're gone, it's like the shadows have returned with a vengeance. I need you, I need you so fucking much it's like a knife in my gut every damn day.

I don't know where you are, what's out there after this life, but I hope you're somewhere better. I hope you're at peace, and I hope you know that I'm here, waiting in this shithole, missing you every fucking day.

I love you, Y/N. I love you so fucking much it hurts. And I wish... I wish I could've showed it more when you were still here.

With all my shattered pieces,

Kaz

28th letter

Deer Y/N,

This will be the last letter I write to you, and as I put pen to paper, I’m filled with a mixture of emotions that words could never truly capture. The passage of time has been unkind, separating us by years that have felt both fleeting and eternal.

It’s strange, the way grief works. It’s a steady ache that never truly fades, an ache I’ve grown accustomed to carrying. There’s an emptiness in my heart that’s become a part of me, a void that can never be filled by anyone or anything else.

I’ve learned to navigate this world without you, though it’s been a journey fraught with challenges and moments of unbearable pain. There’s a longing, a yearning, that can never be quenched. You were my constant, the force that kept me grounded, and now that you’re gone, there’s a piece of me that will forever remain incomplete.

As time marches on, I find myself grappling with a heartbreaking reality – the sound of your voice is fading from my memory. The way you felt, the touch of your hand in mine, it’s becoming harder to recall. It’s as though the vibrant details of your presence are slipping through my fingers, leaving behind a hazy impression.

And oh, Y/N, the thought that your laughter will never again reach my ears, it’s a pain that reverberates through my very being. Your face, once etched in my mind with unparalleled clarity, is beginning to blur around the edges. The little details that I once treasured, the nuances that made you uniquely you, they’re slipping away, like grains of sand carried by the wind.

I love you, Y/N. Those words have become a mantra, a whispered refrain that echoes in the corners of my mind. I carry your memory with me, every step of the way, and I hold onto the hope that, wherever you are, you’ve found the peace that eluded you in life.

As I place this letter alongside the others, a part of me hopes that somehow, somewhere, you’ll receive these words, that you’ll know that you were loved, that you’re still loved, even in your absence.

I miss you, “we all misses you very much.”

Love, Kaz!

[anamoon63]

RL and Sims update post + a thank you note

(Warning: long post ahead, read at your own risk).

I wrote this post to thank you guys for all the likes and comments you keep leaving on my posts, even though, as you may have noticed, I can't be here as often as I used to. Real life has taken over almost completely, as I think it should. There are too many things going on, with me, my family, my country, even my sims and other games, lol.

I'm not going to bore you with daily life problems, much less with sad and depressive stuff, or with previews of a story I don't know when/if I'll ever finish, the only thing I can tell you is that I'm still busy with a lot of work, (fortunately) and family stuff; plus, I (finally) started going to therapy (yes, at my age). So right now, I'm juggling even more things than I already was.

And so I wanted to thank you for sticking with me, for continuing to read the chaotic stories of my wacky characters without judging them; thank you as well for each and every message you have sent to my inbox, be it questions, or flowers and love; and to all of you who continue to tag me both on sims stuff and cute games, knowing that I most likely won't be able to answer you, really, thank you for continuing to think of me. Your messages soothe my heart in difficult moments, and I wish to answer them all, I just don't know when I will be able to do that, hopefully someday.

Now, my sims story. For those of you who might remotely still be interested, I'm currently revising the next few episodes of Time Traveler which I wrote earlier this year. To be honest, I don't know when they will be ready, I just know the story goes on and as soon as I have reviewed these episodes, I'll start taking the pictures. When will they be published? Frankly, I don't know. It could be early 2025, but no promises, as I don't have much free time on my hands now. I manage to write in the evenings, but in-game photo shoots are quite time consuming and have to be done in peace and privacy, of which I don't have much at the moment. So, if I do decide to publish these episodes, it will likely be early next year, and at a rather slow pace.

About my gameplay, in Sims 4 we will continue with the Wilsons until the end of the season (coming soon), and then we will take a small break. As for The Sims 3, we just finished Patrick's story in Bridgeport, so now we'll go back with The Cho Brothers. First, we'll take a brief trip to Lucky Palms with Terence and Cynthia Cho; then we'll spend a rather long time in Hidden Springs and Starlight Shores, to see what has happened with Tyron, the eldest of the Cho brothers. And last but not least, we'll go back to Uni with Dale and Kelly, who I hope will FINALLY graduate this year, hahaha.

Anyway, I just wanted you to know that I am not gone (yet), that if one day I decide to retire I will make a special post about it, I won't leave without saying goodbye, but that day seems far away at least for the moment. 

Now, regarding Inzoi…

I admit Inzoi has captured my interest. As usual, I'm late to the comment party, but I still want to put my two cents about this amazing game. Seeing the trailers and all those beautiful Inzois created by other simmers got me so excited, and at the same time, terribly frustrated to see that the demo didn't contain any gameplay. I need to actually play the game to give an opinion on it! So far it looks beautiful, though I must say that the character creator disappointed me because the sliders are Sims 4 style, which I've always found a bit complicated, I'll forever prefer the Sims 3 sliders, but hey, I had a lot of fun creating my own Inzois.

Hopefully the graphics and gameplay are as good as seen in the previews and its developers won't “break” it into multiple or turn the into a malfunctioning cash cow like EA did with The Sims 4, and to a certain extent, also with the Sims 3 in its time. I hope with Inzoi they'll go for a complete game, no matter if it's expensive, if I consider it is worth it, I'll give them my money as soon as it comes out.

That being said, it is important for me to clarify that I will not abandon The Sims 3 (or even Sims 4 though I don't play it much) for Inzoi. Ever. Neither do I plan to recreate my sims OCs/games in it, because my sims are exactly that, sims. If I ever get to play Inzoi it will be with entirely new characters, although I confess, I did try to reproduce two of my most beloved sims (a boy from the future and a college girl who is a model *wink*) and they turned out pretty well, but nowhere near as adorable as they look in The Sims 3. Plus, the environments in which those two OCs currently move could not be reproduced in Inzoi, at least as far as I know.

Okay, enough of Inzoi. In short: I'm not gone, I'm still here, I'm still reading all your stories, only at a much slower pace, two or 3 simblrs per day at the most. I'm going to read them all, just bear with me, and forgive me again if I don't always comment. Sometimes I don't even have the time or the energy for that. Believe me, 2024 has been an intense year in every possible way, sometimes I really need a break, but I try to be around and will always find a way to keep in touch, even if at times it seems like I'm nowhere to be found, I'll get back to you at some point.

That's all, thanks for reading this far! Have a nice and beautiful start of the week. 💗

P.S. I wrote this post three days ago, wish I had published it earlier, that way I probably wouldn't have gotten a notification that some Simblrs Community 'removed my membership'. When I clicked in said Simblrs Community icon, it said the community was 'private'. I don't know if that's some kind of automatic Tumblr thing, if there's a committee that decides about this, or if it was just a glitch in the matrix; whatever it was, I'm so sorry I wasn't able to be here to keep said membership. I didn't even know Simblr was a private membership. For what it's worth, it wasn't neglect or lack of interest for my part, just lack of time. I hope one day to be able to qualify again and be worthy of this membership. At any rate, I thank you for thinking of me and admitting me in your community in the first place.

[dotster001]

Fallen For You Chapter Three

Summary: Simeon x gn!reader. Now that you're all grounded, you and Simeon are separated. Again. Hopefully he can behave long enough to be ungrounded.

CW: suggestive Simeon

A/N: I totally blacked out to the world, and completely forgot about my event. So I worked hard today to finish this chapter for you all as a little treat treat. Also, I now cross post series on AO3, so give me an hour, and it'll be there if you prefer to read stuff there.

Chapters: One Two Four Five Six

Tap tap tap

Lucifer said nothing. But his eye was starting to twitch.

Tap tap tap tap

He held back a heavy groan. After getting the full story of your little "outing", Simeon was put back into confinement. But to be honest…

Tap tap tap tap

...He fit in really well with Lucifer's other brothers.

Tap tap tap

"Whatever you're typing, I'm certain you can take a break."

Simeon looked up from his typewriter with a glare, before pulling the page he was working on out, scanning it, and adding it to a pile of papers.

He walked over to the barrier, and held out the pile.

"Proofread this for me please."

Lucifer looked down at it, and held back the barrage of insults that he knew Simeon wanted him to release.

….

Everyone was grounded. Mammon was grounded. Asmo was grounded. You were grounded. Simeon was grounded. Solomon was grounded. Everyone was grounded.

Part of your punishment was this.

"How's Simeon doing?"

"I really want to tell you, but I don't want Lucifer to ground me as well," Diavolo said with a sympathetic smile.

"Nice try, Y/N."

You winced as you heard Lucifer enter Dia's office behind you.

"It's not fair! You can't just not tell me what and how he's doing!"

"I can and I will. Although here is a little tidbit of information, since you've been mostly well behaved. He's as obnoxious as ever."

You pouted at his sadistic grin.

"On the upside, TSL fans have something to look forward to. You know how he said he would never make a sequel series? Well he's been tapping away at that type writer non stop. We assumed, for good reason, it was to annoy us, but he slipped us the first chapter for us to "proofread"." Lucifer handed you the beginnings of a manuscript, a sour look on his face.

You had to hold back a giggle as you read.

The Lord of corruption, despite a millenia of fair rule, suddenly became a heartless monster, stealing Henry from his beloved Lord of Shadows. But a  vile heart leads to a vile body, and soon all the world saw what a disgusting ogre the Lord of corruption had truly become.

He was horrific to behold. Children wept upon seeing his visage. The bravest of heroes cowered in fear. Even the other lords coul no longer bear to look at him for how horrifically ugly and putrid he had-

"You get the idea," Lucifer said, taking the stash of papers back.

"I didn't finish reading that!"

"Too bad. You should know how to read faster by now."

"Ooh, I wanna read it!" Diavolo reached for the pile of papers, leading Lucifer to hold it above his head, out of reach of the two biggest children he knew.

Luckily for you, Diavolo was able to get the stack of papers when Mammon busted down the door to the office, a pathetic look on his face.

"I can't take it anymore! Please unground me!"

Asmo was close behind.

"Me too! I'll never do it again!"

"Never do what again?" Lucifer asked with a scowl.

Asmo and Mammon looked at eachother, before sheepishly looking at the floor.

"Dunno."

"Can't remember."

"That's what I thought."

"Look, it's your fault. You ground us too often for us to remember why!" Asmo shouted, throwing his hands in the air.

"Perhaps this will ring a bell. Mammon, I left you with one job. Protect Y/N. And you left Asmo in charge so you could take an extra job to pay off the witches. Asmo, you were trusted to protect Y/N, and keep a certain, immature someone from doing something they shouldn't. And you failed. The avatar of lust fell to a pair of azure blues."

"And I'd do it again. Simeon has pretty eyes, and they deserve to be appreciated," Asmo said with a huff, crossing his arms across his chest.

"Look, I'd say we've been well behaved, so I think you should unground everyone!" You said hastily before Asmo and Mams could dig the hole even deeper.

Lucifer glared at Mammon and Asmo, then at the stack of papers Diavolo was giggling at, then back at you.

"Tell you what. I can unground you. It's not fair to punish you when he was charming you for 50% of the situation."

A pact required full consent from both parties, but you wouldn't complain about getting your freedom back.

"So then, how's Simeon?"

"Angry," Lucifer spat. "He was already unhealthily attached to you after his fall, but the pact just deepened it.  We had to put a secondary barrier up so he wouldn't rip Barbatos and my arms off when we fed him."

You winced. You remembered those first days after he fell clearly. His eyes were in so much pain when you were taken away from him.

"Maybe if I could just talk to him…"

Lucifer groaned. "He's still grounded, remember? And you will find yourself locked in an attic in another dimension if you sneak back up there."

You pouted. But before you could complain-

"I should be ungrounded too! I have a gig I'm supposed to go to tonight!"

"I should also be ungrounded. I'm too pretty to be trapped in the house!"

….

It was so bright. It shouldn't be this bright in the Devildom. Something was wrong.

As your eyes adjusted, you realized you were sitting at a table with a tea party setting. And sitting in front of you was a man.

He was dressed in white, and he had a sweet expression on his face, but the look in his eyes was…unhinged to say the least.

"You must be Y/N," he said, smiling softly. "I must admit, I always imagined the person who caused us so much trouble to be, well, not quite as kind looking as you are."

He reached across the table and gently took your hand in his. Despite the gentleness of his touch, you stiffened. This man touching you was wrong.

"You're just a poor soul who got dragged into this aren't you? It's really a shame. We could use you."

"Y/N, wake up!"

You sat upright in your bed, breathing heavily and covered in sweat. Beel and Belphie had slept with you last night, and they were both looking at you in concern.

"You were having a nightmare. We've been trying to wake you up for ten minutes now," Beel whispered.

"I couldn't enter your dream," Belphie said, his face lined with worry.

That certainly didn't feel like ten minutes. But dreams worked differently.

"Thanks guys," you heaved a sigh. There was no reason to be scared of that man, but something about him was wrong….

Beel passed you a glass of water that you gratefully accepted. The details of the dream were already beginning to fade. All you were left with was a bad feeling in your gut.

"What happened?" Belphie whispered, fear that you weren't used to hearing from him, evident in his voice.

"I don't know, but I'm so happy you woke me up," you snuggled into your twins, allowing yourself some comfort in your boys.

The door burst open, and Asmo skipped in.

"Y/N! Guess what day it is~?" He literally sang as he twirled around your room, landing himself gracefully in your lap, pressing his face close to you as though he fully intended to start making out with you. The only thing that stopped him was Belphie slamming a pillow into his face.

"What day is it?" You asked with a giggle.

Before Asmo could recover and respond, you heard a victorious "WOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" From your favorite avatar of greed as he ran into your room.

"Ristorante six, on me! Let's go! The great Mammon is no longer grounded!!!!!!!!" He cheered, dancing around your room, and ignoring Asmo's glorious pout.

"Wait! That means!" You cut yourself off, running down the hall and bursting into Lucifer's room, leaping onto his bed knees first, accidentally hitting his stomach in the process.

"The boys aren't grounded anymore!" You exclaimed excitedly.

He looked at you, looked at the time on his phone, then groaned. 

"You better be on your best behavior, little dove."

You nodded quickly, folding your hands in your lap to indicate innocence. He sighed, and got up, grabbing his robe and making his way to the attic, you close behind.

He'd set up a different kind of barrier this time, one that even you couldn't get through. He dispelled the first layer, then the second, then the third, and you were able to make your way up the stairs.

Simeon was gripping the doorway by the time you made it up the stairs, his jaw clenched so hard you worried for his poor teeth.

"Is it time?" He moaned out, sounding so sad, so desperate, it hurt a little bit. 

"Behave," was all Lucifer said as he dispelled the final barrier, allowing Simeon to run straight at you, faster than even Mammon could move.

His arms were around you, his mouth on your neck as he nibbled and bit along it possessively.

"I want you so carnally," he hissed. 

Your jaw dropped in embarrassment as your eyes flickered to Lucifer, who already looked like he was going to pop a blood vessel, while simultaneously shoving Simeon back into the attic.

"You can't say things like that!" You murmured, and he snickered, before placing a particularly hard bite along your neck.

"I can say what I want," he giggled, but you knew him well enough to know that since it had embarrassed you, he wouldn't say it again. After all, just because he had fallen, didn't mean he was a completely different person.

"Behave," Lucifer snapped one last time, before heading down the attic stairs. 

"I heard you were writing a sequel series. I only read the first two paragraphs," you said shyly.

He scooped you up in his arms, and walked into the attic, settling into one of the large chairs, and pulling you as close as the chair and your bones would allow.

"It's dedicated to you, my little lamb. I'll tell you all about it. See, it all starts when the Lord of Corruption's glamor spell finally fades, and everyone can see he looks like a hideous toad…"

....

Tag list- @leonia0 @eccedentesiast-sapphic @your-next-daydream @stella0567 @sarah22447 @sno-leopards

[c0smiccom3t]

AND NOW.... FOR A SPECIAL 3RD ANNIVERSARY UPDATE. (6/1/2024)

Hello friends, hello mutuals, hello dimension dyfenders fans and hello people who like indie cartoon/comic stuff in general! Comet here. Once Again. and this time i've got something ig this year. This was supposed to release on May 29th, but due to Ren not coming back for a long time because they needed to prioritize irl stuff, of course, we had to delay it.

But, but, BUT! thankfully I had a few things ready after all, however as for some other things else, we'll get to it much later, when the moment calls. Now, let's get off with the first one.

(warning, in case this update gets too long, i'll make a part two where i'll be able to link it through here.)

You Kinda... Look Different.

You may have noticed that Dislexo looks a bit different than usual (darker skin, a bit of shorter hair, etc.), in case you're wondering why... Yeah, you're about to find out.

So, while I was thinking and drawing up some D.D related stuff, I was brainstorming a little by my lonesome. All of the sudden, as I was making a new render for a character, I was like... "Wait a minute... What if I give Dislexo a new look which is a mix between a secretary and a butler but keep it's elements from what made their design unique?" and So, the new and improved Dislexo was born!

Honestly i'm proud of what they look like now. I just hope i won't (or will) get to redesign ALL of the cast again so suddenly lol! Anyways, thats just a small change I made, nothing too big. Now, let's get on something else... which is...

Pocket Adventures' current status + how's minisode 1 coming along

You might be asking inside your minds, "i wonder when more of minisode 1 will drop", "where are the new parts?"- Well, i got the answer. It'll only come only when im completely finished. However i havent been working much on it aside from making a few pages a few months ago, but hopefully this summer i may get back to it and finish it all up if i can. The final script is 73% percent complete, as for the comic itself, let's just say its 58%. I promise you i'm taking my time with delivering everything i can for this minisode. However i might republish the minisode with the series' current artstyle if it ever comes out physically (or either when I'll have the time or energy to do it.) So, now, you may be wondering: "But Comet, what do we do while we wait." Well you're not gonna believe this.

No, it's not an extremely late april fools post! We got new stuff coming soon, recently i've been brainstorming some ideas for brand new content, and you know what? It came to me, HERE'S WHAT'S COMING!

MORE TOONIES COMING YOUR WAY!

THAT'S RIGHT, after months of hiatus, Toonies is coming back with more strips! This time, since summer's coming around, i'll try to post and make more of them and even schedule the finished ones! We got even more covers for it coming, but for now, here's one of them!

More comics are not only gonna explore more of the Dyfenders' and the Dajo Crew's everyday lives in-and-out of their superhero/Villain occupations, we are also going to focus on much more on other characters (at least some of them), and some will last for a few more pages longer! No arcs though, sorry. But hey, you're getting more wackiness as a treat! Now, i know i said this year is not gonna be big like the other two years we had, but...

NEW SPECIAL CURRENTLY IN DEVELOPMENT!

THAT'S RIGHT! We're working on a new special to commemorate our three years! Thought it'd be a nice adiction to this year, we may not reveal the logo and it's title yet, but we can tell you what the sypnosis is about!

You're all invited to the biggest night in the Omniverse, right across it's stars, cosmos, galaxies and portals! Both the Dimension Dyfenders and the Dajo-Crew are crossing the red (or should we say, blue) carpet in this brand new 3-part special! Prince Dajo-Voo has a new plan on how to take over the gala, all while he tries to self-control himself from doing the same explosive incident he did back then. The Dyfenders may be having a great time at the gala, but rest assured, they'll be sure to keep a close eye on him. Here's to a Rift-errific and (hopefully) trouble-free gala!

As a bonus, when the production on all three parts are done, we'll be posting Toonies comics related to the special, which may feature a new character who will debut later on in Pocket Adventures! We don't know when it'll exactly be out, my guesses would be either summer, september or next May 2025. But rest assured, we'll be working on it, but we won't rush it out.

So... What's next?

Honestly, i can't really tell. But I can assure you i still have so may plans for this series, plans that will be put in action in the far-off future. What i really hope to do is to make animated shorts as well, not just Toonies strips, pocket adventures minisodes and comic dubs of it. Maybe if we'll ever make a backerkit or a kickstarter for it and get a budget, it might happen (along with more VAs joining in.) Speaking of VAs, in case you're a VA and you haven't auditioned yet, anytime is the right time! (this is still a test leap, but if it succeeds it may go further.)

but for now, we're sticking to comics, and then, if possible we'll get to comic dubs and so on.

That's all for now! I hope you're all looking forward to what's coming for this series. I'm sorry that it wasnt as big as the last years, but we promise that things will arrive when they can.

Happy (LATE) third anniversary, everybody!! Thanks for reading!

By the way, HAPPY PRIDE MONTH!!

[fishsticksloser]

Can i request rottmnt platonic child!fem! Reader & April one-shot?

April sign up to babysit reader for hours from 3 pm to 8 pm, however reader manage to escape from the apartment thanks to mayhem teleporting her accidentally, so now April go on a wild goose chase to find reader before her mom (reader's mom) come home.

Babysitting Disaster

April + gn!reader

Warnings: kids, losing said child, swearing, kinda short

A/N: This was gonna be posted yesterday, but I was just not feeling good. Also if you haven't yet, check out my Discord server where you can hang out with like minded people, share fanart/fanfics, and get updates before they're posted here.

Everything was going well. In April's opinion at least. She headed over to babysit you right after her last class and you were a pretty easy kid. You were quiet, respectful, and sweet. April immediately thought that she'd babysit you again if there was ever a need.

You and Mayhem got along really well, playing with each other. For the first time in a while, Mayhem was being friendly with someone else (he doesn't hate the turtles but doesn't really like them either).

Right after dinner though, she was cleaning up when April saw a flash of light. She wondered for a moment if Leo just showed up and went to check it out. But she didn't see anything when she went into your room. In fact, she didn't hear anything either. At first she thought nothing of it, you were a quiet kid.

Soon though, she realized you weren't in the apartment at all. Neither was Mayhem. "Shit..." April grabbed her jacket and rushed out. She had no clue where Mayhem could've teleported them, but she did know someone who might be able to help.

"You're conversing with Donatello." April hears as she finally makes it out of the apartment building.

"So... Remember how I was babysitting that toddler?" April asks, hearing his brothers in the background so they'll probably hear her predicament. Donnie hums in acknowledgement. "Mayhem may or may not have accidentally teleported them somewhere..."

"You're telling me you lost a kid?" Donnie snorts. April hears his brothers stop talking for a moment.

"April lost a kid?" Raph asks, his voice full of worry and concern.

"Technically..." April closes her eyes, waiting for Raph or even Mikey and Leo to yell at her. But all she hears is a heavy sigh.

"Sigh... I guess I can look at any crazy activity and hopefully find the kid." Donnie huffs, making his way to his lab. "You're lucky I figured out how to track that mystic stuff."

"If we're able to catch them in like... An hour, that'd be fantastic." She pleads, starting to walk down the street.

"Yeah, yeah..." Donnie waves off her concern, getting the system running. "The others are coming to hopefully help, but knowing them..."

Donnie stayed at the lair while his brothers joined April in her search. Someone had been close a few times, but ultimately Mayhem teleported himself and you away. April was growing desperate and scared that she wouldn't get you home before your mom got home.

Thankfully, Leo's portals saved the day. He managed to separate you and Mayhem. Leo teleported April, himself, and you back to the apartment.

"Thanks, guys." April let out a relieved breath when Leo placed you back in her arms. She took you to bed while Leo and the boys went home. She tucked you in tight. "You scared me, you could've gotten hurt. Next time, stay where you are and I'll find you, okay?" April tells you sternly, but her voice is still soft.

You fall asleep not long after and April finishes cleaning up before your mom comes home. Next time, Mayhem was staying home.

[citrinekay]

Hey! I’ve been meaning to reach out and say hi for a while! Finally, I got a re-blog from you, tysm!! I’ve seen quite a few of your JCW posts (and also your stuff on various fandoms on AO3) and I know you’re quite the JCW fan – me too! Actually, I wanted to message to let you know that I think what you’re doing with the Andy/Revolver fanfic you’re writing is amazing. I read the first chapter a few days ago and am interested to see what you do with the story. The way you are dealing with some very sensitive topics is so well written, and I love the thought you have put into Andy’s character to give him this dark backstory. I’m looking forward to reading the rest when it’s completed, I never do well with chapter by chapter!! Also, well done for being the first to post for the Revolver fandom, I remember a short time back having to do that for the Pachinko fandom and I was nervous as hell. You are a very talented writer for sure, so I know the Revolver one will be a good read. Hopefully you’ll be inspired with Gangnam B-Side too once we see more. Anyway, sorry for waffling on, but if you ever wanna enthuse about JCW feel free to message ❤️ ~ take care 

Hi!! I've also seen your name popping up on AO3 too whenever I go to publish something JCW-related, like oh there's that one other person who loves him as much as I do😊lol I watched Worst of Evil last October and just fell completely in love him/ haven't been able to get back out of the obsession spiral since then thanks to pretty much every work he's done being worth watching. I don't expect the fixation to end any time soon haha

I'm genuinely so happy to receive feedback on my Revolver fic! Before I started posting, I made peace with the fact that it wasn't going to get much engagement since I had to create the fandom tag myself, but of course I do want some people to read and enjoy it. I was also fairly nervous about approaching those sensitive topics, so it's a relief to know that the way I'm presenting it doesn't feel offensive or tactless. It's always my intention to show the dark sides of human nature and relationships in a compelling but empathetic way. I couldn't stop thinking about the crumbs they gave us about Andy and Grace's relationship after I finished watching the movie, especially that final scene on the mountain when he begs her not to leave him and Madam Jung's comment to Suyeong that there's "rumors that he's her lover." She doesn't even allow people to know he's really her mom, which in and of itself could be pretty damaging to someone's development, but it seemed to me that the toxicity between them goes further than just this secret. They were clearly manipulating each other in that moment when she starts to walk away and then he cries and begs her not to leave. I thought that it seemed as if they had been through this type of push-and-pull before, a vicious cycle from which there is no escaping, and I really wanted to examine what had led up to that point.

It also really struck me that even though Andy is a privileged, wealthy person, he is drinking alone when Suyeong first meets him. Nobody rushes to his rescue when she's beating him and nobody really cares that he got hurt afterward (not even Grace, she's just mildly annoyed!) While it's true that his behavior invites getting his ass kicked, I think that anyone acting with such conscious disregard of their own life and everyone else's might have serious trauma that has never been addressed. Anyway, I totally understand waiting to read the fic until it's complete and I hope you enjoy the rest once it's done. I'll be updating weekly, so it shouldn't be too much longer.

Also, absolutely yes about Gangnam B-Side. I watched the first 2 episodes on Wednesday evening and my brain is already tickling with many thoughts about Gilho. As always, JCW is delivering a performance full of depth and nuance 🖤 I'll wait until the show has finished airing and I have all the character details to start writing but atm I can almost guarantee there will be some fics coming from me!

[according2thelore]

HOLY shit you should write a time travel fic!!!! I want to see them all locked in the bunker together….. ES Sam and LS Dean watching their alt selves sew themselves together with horror and jealousy. ES Sam seeing LS Sam and thinking it’s the worst saddest thing he’s ever seen in his life.

I also think LS Sam and Dean fight more violently when they do fight? At least if we’re comparing season 1 and, like, 10, but even like s14. ES them watching that with a mixture of fury but also like. It’s unfortunately hot.

hello!!!!

i have actually been gently nurturing a ES!Dean and LS!Sam fic for months like coaxing a deer out of the woods. It's slow work and every time I open the doc it flees but ARGH!!! I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY ABOUT THEM!!!!!!!!!!! hopefully i will be able to finish it soon

but all of them TOGETHER??? omg...your brain...is so big...let's discuss

ES!Sam would be ripping himself apart in jealousy, and would not even really know why. both deans flock to sam like he's the axis of the world, like he's the only person to ever exist, like he's some kind of god that drips sun from his fingers.

he's never seen his dean this vulnerable and weird and desperate for approval (not even recognizing that dean has also been desperately seeking his approval but whatever), and he HATES LS!Sam for it. he's openly hostile, and keeps making rude comments at him that make ES!Dean so angry lol.

bc LS!Sam also gave up on their dream! he doesn't even pretend to want to get out of hunting. he lives in a secret bunker and sleeps with guns under his pillow and talks of their father with warm hesitation like 'yeah he was messed up but he was good' and sam can't stand him. and he looks at his brother (both of them now, young and old like some weird mirror) like he's never seen anything more worthy. it makes sam sick, because he sees this as a defeat. LS!Sam is a coward, who gave up. not for wanting dean, but for betraying everything he's stood for for twenty-odd years.

(he doesn't know, of course, that sam has the life he wants)

LS!Dean, however, would know exactly why he's so fucking furious. and because ES!Dean is still dean, he'd be so mean to his younger self lol. he'd purposefully stop talking when his younger self walks in, keeps trying to separate he and LS!Sam, keeps trying to leave him behind on stuff so he can have 100% of sam's attention and love and concern again.

which i think LS!Sam would not tolerate lmao. he sees the kicked-puppy-earnest look in young dean and it's like sticking a steak in front of a starving man--he cannot resist!!!

LS!Dean makes ES!Dean more appealing to LS!Sam by being mean to him and ES!Sam makes ES!Dean more defensive of and devoted to LS!Sam by being mean to him lol

it's a lot of deans and sams to keep up with but they would be so tangled and messy

ES!Sam and LS!Dean keep catching each others' eyes when LS!Sam and ES!Dean are being sappy or open w each other, lips curled in jealousy. and at first it's some kind of twisted camaraderie, but at the end, LS!Dean walks up to ES!Sam because, god, he'd dreamed about this kid for years.

he's missed how angry sam used to be, how much faith he had in himself and his convictions, how passion lights him up all the time and not just when they're alone.

and maybe he claps a hand on sammy's shoulder and god, when did dean's hands get so big? when did he develop smile lines and crow's feet and scruff at his jawline? and why does it make sam feel like this?

the first time that LS!Sam&Dean fight, ES!Sam&Dean are absolutely gobsmacked. bc every fight with them is An End Of The World Fight. it's messy and personal and hurtful, only low blows, and barely-not-teary and you're-my-brother-i'll-let-the-world-burn and when did they start saying that shit out loud?? and dean watches the way LS!Sam towers over him, how his fists clench and his eyes flash and his lip curls and...uh-oh. and sam can't look away from how strong LS!dean is, how he carries himself like a blade and not a person and jesus christ.

LS!Sam&Dean would see the way that ES!Sam&Dean dance around each other, but how painfully earnest they are all the time, how cocky they are, and how narrow their idea of "things that can go wrong" is and it's heart-breaking but also...bolstering? reassuring? hopeful?

not to woobify dean, but i genuinely think that he Would Need LS!Sam's Approval Like He Needs To Breathe. i think LS!Sam would genuinely be charmed by this like one is charmed by a dog tripping over its own feet. and ES!Sam and LS!Dean are sick with jealousy abt how openly they let themselves need each other.

anyway. this is probably nothing. it's word vomit. but you get it!!!!!! anon <3 lovely anon <3 mwah

-lizzy

(ES = early seasons, LS = later seasons, for those who missed the last post here)

[ceydoessillystuff]

is the story for your inside out superhero AU similar to the plots of the first and second film.

also, I'm already loving this AU for just how unique it is. hope to see the other characters get introduced:)

Oh, thank you so much! I've been really busy studying and stuff, so I haven't been able to sit down and finish my designs yet, but hopefully I'll be able to at least doodle them! I already have my Joy design which I think looks very fun, I wish I can show her soon! For now I only got this messy picture of her face.

But answering your question, yes! I wanted to make an AU where the emotions could be human and feel like so without them loosing what makes them... Them? (This is something I fear to do in every fandom I'm in honestly) And the plot still being like, about mental health. I'm not sure how to explain it! And besides that, I thought that them actually being superheroes was a really funny idea, I mean, the Headquarters already gave me Teen Titans vibes so I thought, "I have to doodle this..." And here we are!

Joy had her differences with Sadness just like in the first movie, and Anxiety and her crew just appeared "out of nowhere" too at some point in the Headquarters. It's just that in my AU this events are explained by worldbuilding and sometimes they happened in a different way, so the plot can give a message that isn't related to Riley, but it's about them instead.

[mj-iza-writer]

Whumpee nervously waited for the doctor to do the eye check for their appointment. They hadn't told Caretaker yet, but they desperately needed new glasses. Whumper broke their other pair during their captivity.

They had made it this long without telling Caretaker, but it was getting terribly difficult to see and hide the squinting.

"Uh doctor", Whumpee sighed, "I can save you some time if you like. I'm not going to be able to read those letters."

"Let's try anyways, it's part of you checkup", the doctor started the test.

"Yes. You failed that", the doctor sighed, "is this something that came about during your time with Whumper?"

"No doctor, I've always had glasses for a while, Whumper broke my other pair", Whumpee looked down shyly, "I've been too nervous to bother Caretaker with it though. They've been so busy with me already."

"I understand that, but it's not good or fair for you to go about with bad vision", the doctor smiled, "I know Caretaker very well, they will be happy to know their is something they can help you with."

The doctor finished the rest of the exam, "given the circumstances, you are in fairly good health, just a few things. You need to get your weight up, and new glasses. You'll also find rest to be your best friend while you heal."

Whumpee nodded.

"Let's bring Caretaker in. We can tell them the news together", the doctor patted Whumpee's shoulder, then left.

Whumpee sighed, 'something else they have to deal with.'

Caretaker came in and winked at Whumpee, "so you are blind", they smiled, "I was kind of figuring, but didn't want to say anything in case you just couldn't read."

"I'm sorry, I didn't want to bother you with it. My other pair got broken by Whumper", Whumpee looked at the doctor.

"It's not a bother at all, I'm sorry you've gone so long without seeing", Caretaker sighed, "you've been with me a week and a half, plus however long it's been since those were broke. You definitely need them. Anything else you want to tell me."

"No besides what the doctor said, I seem healthy", Whumpee watched Caretaker pull out their phone.

"I'll get the appointment scheduled. Hopefully they're not booking way out", Caretaker looked, "please don't keep secrets from me. Your care is my top priority right now, and I need to know stuff like this to get you back to health. Don't worry about bothering me, I'd rather know, then find out."

Whumpee nodded.

Caretaker managed to get Whumpee in the next day for the eye appointment.

"Okay right in here", Caretaker led, "don't want the blind one to get lost", they teased.

That's was the running joke, and Whumpee enjoyed every bit of the humor.

The doctor clicked away with the lenses, and made the adjustment just right.

"Okay, you can pick your frames. You'll have to deal with this for about a week or so while the glasses are made", the doctor led them to the room.

Caretaker and Whumpee went through several glasses.

"These are just like my old pair", Whumpee held up a pair, "I kind of liked how they looked."

"Try them on and see if you still like them", Caretaker smiled.

"Okay", Whumpee slid them on and looked at Caretaker.

"I like them, what do you think", Caretaker held up a mirror.

Whumpee looked for a second, then felt their lips quiver.

"Are you okay?", Caretaker worried.

"Uh yes, just, overwhelmed", Whumpee smiled, "this is what I remember myself looking like, and when my glasses broke, I lost that, and I lost my sight. Now I'm seeing myself again, and I'll have my vision soon. I'm overwhelmed with excitement."

"I'm happy I am able to do things like this, these moments are the best. I'm able to watch someone be built back up", Caretaker smiled, "this is my favorite part of the job."

Whumpee pulled off the glasses and wiped a away a tear.

"Are these the glasses?", Caretaker questioned.

"Yes Caretaker", Whumpee wiped another tear away, and smiled. They took a deep breath, "these are the ones."

After they finished the order, Caretaker and Whumpee waited for the call for new glasses.

Taglist. As always please let me know if you want to be added or taken off of the list. It's not a problem at all. @villainsandheroes @the-beasts-have-arrived @sacredwrath @porschethemermaid @monarchthefirst @generic-whumperz @bloodyandfrightened

[moonstonediamond]

A lot has happened since I've been gone lol

Gravity Falls is back (I would love to post about that theories, art, head cannons and just a bunch of other stuff that I couldn't stop thinking about, especially that chaotic fancy top hat wearing Dorito man that was once a contestant for Tumblr sexy man, don't ask me what year, and may or may not be a little too into fire and just recently got a book that I have 2 head cannons/I think 1 could be classified as a theory if I get more evidence it's-), Error won 2024 sexy man (lol finally), and a bunch of other stuff has been going on...

Hey everyone that has been following so far, sorry I've been gone I've gotten busy in the past couple days and I haven't had time or energy to post.

I keep saying I will post more often but I seem to not be able to lol

Anyway while I was gone in my free time I have been doing a lot of stuff that I wanted to post for the blog. So first off I made art, I wanted to post it while I was gone but like I said I didn't and I've been teaching myself coding, and blender so I'll be posting that soon (just the art and blender part)

I've also been working on a few of my comics the eclipse one (I've been trying to get the comic lettering on the 3rd page and just finished the drawing of the 4th page so now I need to do the lettering) and Overgrown AU (I'm just writing the plan of the story I know how I want it to start and who's the antagonist for the whole story but I need to write motives and plan out how that plan is going to go) I've also been working on trying to write something about that lucid dream I talked about (no promises though on that I've been stuck on the start I don't like it but at the same time I do like it)

Anyway that is most of what I've been trying to work on as well as my current posting plans and well I'm back from not posting as often and hopefully I can continue thanks for sticking around and thanks to the people that lurked on my blog while I was gone the hearts and a few reblogs I got were really nice and reminded me of a lot of projects I've created and never finished

[hitori-au]

been a little while since i've been able to post here, but hi! sorry for the lack of... well... anything throughout april. i didn't particularly have anything ready to share about the AU when it came to art or fic updates. hopefully you enjoyed GREEN SUNNY JUNIOR'S company. love that guy.

so what's been going on? a lot of stuff, actually. tons of things have been happening in my own personal life, ranging from a relative experiencing a serious injury to me devoting nearly all my time to making sure i graduate high school. these things (along with a few other irrelevant things like general writer's block and recently getting over seasonal illness) have resulted in development of the HITORI AU being pretty rocky in all aspects.

however, this does NOT mean the project is going on hiatus or is being abandoned. far from it, actually. i want to finish this story that i've already spent so much time on, and i really want to share what i have to all of you as soon as i possibly can. unfortunately, like all things, they take time. LOTS of time, especially on my own. i'm going to continue to do my best to continue this story and make it's the best it can possibly be. it'll be a while, but just remember to be patient.

aside from writing, some new art is definitely going to be arriving this month! i plan on completely reworking the HITORI character references as seen in my pinned post (the attached doodle can be a sneak peek...!) additionally, there are also plans for a birthday piece for AUBREY later on, and maybe even some drawings of the other characters that have appeared in the fic so far, so keep your eyes peeled for those in the coming months!!

that's all i can really think of to mention right now... thank you all for sticking around, and i'll see you later!!! also, here's an entirely unrelated drawing i made a while ago to compensate for the lack of art

-neomoons