#and honestly. they need new pots by now themselves too

[vimbry]

the little spider plant on my windowsill (the eldest one) has been borderline neglected by me so many times by forgetting to water it frequently enough, has browning at the tips of the leaves, and is generally looking a bit worse for wear, but I just noticed that it's producing Another stolon (the 3rd currently on there!) despite it all.

[evilminji]

I got distracted, BUT I REMEMBERED!

The Dr.'s Fenton? Would ABSOLUTELY fight a child.

Specifically, Hatsume Mei. Future CEO of Hatsume Industries! And ENGINEERING RIVAL of their's! They may be new to this whole "support industy" business, but they are SEASONED weaponry makers! And that brilliant little upstart is good! Audacious! A THREAT!!!

COME GET SOME!!! D:<

See, they needed to Move. Things were getting a bit... spicy. They may have made so unfortunate choices, back before they knew the truth about their Son and Ghosts in general.

Ignorance, bigotry, and academic bias are curses in their house for a REASON, after all. They never thought... after all the DECADES of facing it themselves...

Well...

Needless to say, they were, are, and will always BE horrified by how they acted. There may have be a whole host of reasons behind WHY they acted that way. But those WHYs aren't good enough. They should have been better. Done better. They don't offer any excuses, but but they can give an explanation, if it's wanted.

And, together, as a family, they got through Maddie n Jack's horrifying mistakes.

God they don't deserve those kids. Love them to pieces. The things they don't warn ya about parenthood, you know? The mistakes you might make. You think you're ready. Think everything's alright. Then your life's work KILLS your son and brings him back.

And you don't notice.

......what sort of parents DONT NOTICE?

They still have nightmares. Feel sick. God, if they were working in ANY other field. With ANY other materials! If it wasn't SPECIFICALLY ectoplasm? He... he wouldn't have come back. Oh god.

........

So.... so, yeah.

They're working on some things! As a family! Seeing a therapist from the Zone. Lovely... Them? They're a tree person. Neither Jack or Maddie is quite certain what gender pronouns, if ANY, they are supposed to use. They've been defaulting to They/Them just to be safe. Still! Alien therapist! Neat!

But, of COURSE. The BABIES in White throw a FIT. "Wah, wah, wah you've been compromised blah blah blah" oh PLEASE! Just because they've had a little personal growth! And stopped shooting at Phantom in public! And in general! You shoot ONE little Goverment agent for trying to shoot your baby and suddenly YOUR the bad guy!

He didn't even die!

So, yeah, BIT spicy.

Honestly? Feels like a long time coming. They were never very popular. This ultimately just feels like the ends of a road that began in college. Them, the two "crazies" with their backs to the wall, as the government closes in, trying to tear them down for knowing the TRUTH and refusing to shut up about it. Their reputations so deep in the mud, they're tasting bedrock.

At least they are together.

And thank god they've had years to plan for the inevitable.

So? They have the kids grab their go bags and head off too stay with Danny's new celebrity friend from another dimension, Mr Wayne. Nice man, little dim, but since he's willing to open his home to the kids in case of emergency? Perfect. And frankly, as long as Mr. Pennyworth is there, everything will be fine.

Besides! Lil Damian is a very respectful and responsible young man. Tim and Danny may get up to mischief, but they can trust the youngest to put his foot down.

THEM on the other hand?

Not so lucky. THEY have to stay with the house. It's not exactky like they can move the portal after all, it's built in. And this is where the kids grew up! Where Jack and her scrimped and saved, lived out of cars and off nickle noodles, to afford! This is their HOME! And no jack booted THUG is going to take that.

So the kids go first. They go to the command center. Jack takes pot shots while she fires up... THAT machine. The one they wired into the house itself, right along with the Ectoplasmic Shielding. It was all theoretical, once. But not anymore.

Now they have The Zone.

It's been collecting energy runoff from the open gate ever since it opened. Siphoning them into the sub-basment mega batteries. Enough to run two-thirds the planet for the next half a millennia. If only the damn patent office would LET THEM PATENT THEIR WORK-!

But that doesn't matter anymore. No, what matters is checking how full the battery banks are. Decently. It HAS been a while since they've done a controlled drain. Good, that means they have more then enough.

So, with no kids to witness things getting nasty? She pulls out her keys and unlocks the parental commands, flips the the shields to "strobe-kill". Let's see you crowd us NOW fuckers. With Jack freed up to help aim the house? They set to work.

It's... not EXACTLY an exact science, as much as they'd prefer it to be. More of a controlled jump. Set preferences, power jump, hop sideways an unknown distance. Land. Look around.

Is it what you want?

Habitable?

A zombie apocalypse?

Jump again. And again. And again. Until the battery runs out. Then sit... or float...or drift, there, until the batteries refill. You have to be mindful, of course, that you don't lose Shield coverage. Because it keeps the House air tight and together. If you jump and immediately lose power to the shields because you misjudged the energy left in the batteries?

Better HOPE you land somewhere with a breathable atmosphere and no zombies!

And Fentons don't rely on HOPE! They rely on good ol firepower and hutzpa!

Also advanced ectoplasmic scientific engineering! But that was a given.

It... takes a while. They run out of canned peaches. Have to stop TWICE to help cure a zombie plague, since they are the only ones with a still working lab. They were actually sort of joking with the kids about the zombies. Oof. Good thing Ectoplasm eats EVERYTHING. One specialized ecto shot and that disease is TOAST.

Granted, the surviors are all limnal now. But they don't seem to care in the slightest.

Then there was the whole "oop! Planet's gone." Couple of worlds. The one with the crabs. The ocean one. The ice age. The robots. The cartoon horses. The inappropriately dressed high-schoolers with weapons fighting God. The boring one. The one with ninjas...

I mean, they are just NOT having any LUCK!

Okay, next moderately stable world, they are doing a groceries run! A Man can not live off freeze dried meals forever! Well, you CAN. But it's making Jack sad, and frankly that's a war crime. Plus she's run out of tea! AND coffee! A life of no caffeine? She can't endure that.

She's started to eye her son's God awful energy abominations in a can, for God sake! Desperate time's and all that...

Zyeyooom!

Thunk!

Which? Is how? The ENTIRE class of 1-H? Turns to stare in ABSOLUTE HORROR at the cackling, head thrown back, hands clawed, mad scientist "it's alive! It's aliiiiiiive" type insanity that is Hatsume Mei and her "this green goo I found from some guys Quirk" powered teleport anchor.

It MADE A HOUSE.

On SCHOOL FUCKING GROUNDS. An ENTIRE house! Is... is that a blimp? That's English right? What's it say?! What the FUCK is that sh- OH MY GOD ARE THOSE PEOPLE!? MEI!!!!!

So begins... the Fentons Beef With A Child™.

Because! Mei will forever more claim! That SHE brought them to this universe with HER magnificent machine! But Maddie and Jack? At first, trying to be nice about it, helpfully point out, actually? No. THEIR house can and does reality jump. THEY brought themselves.

Mei ignores them.

Crows about her magnificent machine. Scoffs about them thinks they haspd anything to do with it.

Oh... oh it is ON, you tiny pink haired little shit!

Does the Japanese Government want to take control of the situation? Of course they do. They want these scientists and they want that house. Local Nedzu's say? "It's nice to want things" :) *sips tea mockingly*

They landed on HIS school's grounds. Finders keepers!

You may say "threat to national security" but HE says "free support gear for the students and security for the school"! Not to MENTION all this delightful FREE clean energy! They are a delightful couple. With a portal to the fabric between realities in their basement!

Not found of the laboratory, but that's a personal issue. The ZONE however? Oooohohohohoho~☆

It? Would DRIVE THE HPSC and Japanese government BATSHIT INSANE that they can't get at the portal? That threats and stealth Heros and every other method? Just... hits a brick wall. A big ol "lol nope!" Meanwhile Nedzu and occasionally random teachers or students are popping in and out of this house they can get into?

Nedzu especially standing just on the other side of the shields going >:3 neener~ neener~ neener~ Ha ha! I could be mature about this but am CHOOSING NOT TO BE!

@legitimatesatanspawn @mutable-manifestation @hdgnj @hypewinter @babbling-babull

[ellemfaoh]

do you have hcs for qiu/tamarack (step 2 or 3) with an anxious, clingy mc 🥺

A/N: omgomgomg OL2 ask yay!!! I’ll give you a little treat for the long wait and include both of them :3 I decided to go with step 3 because I like the idea of them being able to handle it a bit more maturely. Also since it wasn’t specifically mentioned otherwise, assume there’s an established relationship between you both. Little side note, I’m a total sap for long-haired Tama + Qiu so that’s what you get >:)

Qiu "Autumn" Lin ~

Honestly? I imagine Qiu as a bit of a golden retriever in step 3, considering they finally feel comfortable with themselves.

Back in the step 2 era you never really had to think about Qiu leaving you behind since it was made obviously clear that if you weren’t in then you were out.

Now though?

It’s no surprise that Qiu is popular. They’ve been popular forever. Now they’ve opened up again and are the ‘magnanimous top dog’ of Golden Grove.

It’s a little harder to remain cool when you’re interrupted in almost every moment you two spend together. 

It feels like everyone HAS to get their daily dose of interacting with him.

The already steaming pot of emotions bubbled over when you were late to lunch one day and found a girl way too close to Qiu..

How are you supposed to react? Your anxiety about being an inadequate partner was telling you to run off and find solace in loneliness or Tamarack, but your clinginess was screaming about everything.

You ended up just standing there until Qiu noticed, saying goodbye before jogging over to where you were standing.

You were considerably more clingy than you had been from that point on.

You’d text him at least once at any moment, checking your phone constantly and anxiously. You’d volunteer to go everywhere and anywhere with Qiu, not letting them get a word in before you joined. 

Who doesn’t follow their partner on social media? Who doesn’t obsessively check their page to see if there’s anything – anyone – new there?

Don’t forget all the talk about being together forever. You debated proposing at graduation, but they chuckled and said that would be too much to celebrate in one day.

It’s meant well at first. They barely notice the change in your relationship. Qiu just figured that you were extra in love.

You, on the other hand, were just anxious and worried and always thinking that you had to prove to Qiu that you were good enough, even if they always greeted and parted with a sweet kiss.

It all comes to a head when they left to go ‘hang out with a friend in town’ and you nearly burst into jealous tears. 

You called him not even thirty minutes later to ‘chat.’ Qiu was a little confused and hung up rather quickly after saying they’d be back later that night.

When he finally showed up you practically threw their jacket off and checked for any signs that someone else had done something to him. Your anxiety about being cheated on had been chewing away at you all evening.

Qiu actually pushed you away and asked what was wrong and why you had been acting so weird, and that’s when the dam broke and you started crying. You pathetically all your swirling, anxious thoughts.

When your tears finally stopped coming you looked at them expecting anger or annoyance, but all you were met with was gentleness as they pulled you into their arms and started whispering to you about how much they loved you and how you were all he ever needed to feel loved.

From that point on, they always paid a little extra attention to the little details in your body language and mood.

They also never failed to (gently) let you know when you started to go a bit overboard with your fears, always being sure to reassure and remind you that you can always let them know how you feel.

Qiu is ALWAYS touching you in some way whenever he’s with you too. Your bringing up your anxieties highlighted his own about feeling like he wasn’t doing enough for you.

Hand holding, soothing and well-timed kisses, an arm around your shoulder, clothing swaps, the list goes on.

If you aren’t really a fan of PDA, believe that they’re always standing more than a little close when they notice your mood shift. They’ll also give you a quick peck when no one’s looking, or even lace your pinkies together.

Cuddles are the time when he really lays it on thick, hands caressing your back and lips brushing against you, gentle words of comfort falling from his lips.

There are times when Qiu has to be firm with boundaries or remind you that it’s good for you to do things on your own.

It’s a bit of a hurdle, but eventually, you start to unwind from the clingy and anxious habits.

<3

Tamarack Baumann ~

Tamarack hasn’t ever really been as outgoing as Qiu until maybe step 3, and even that is a stretch. Tbh I see her as someone who’s accepted friends into her circle as they come, rather than go looking for them.

Also, with the kind of person she is, I imagine you’re clingy because of your anxiety.

With Tamarack I feel like you’d be a little more direct and less secretive/guilty about it.

She’s always given off the aura of understanding, a friend first and foremost above all else.

You’d be anxious over her finding someone better of course, especially if you two didn’t partake in the same hobbies. What if she meets someone who aligns with her more than you ever will, despite your years of history?

Tamarack is strangely perceptive though. An attribute of living with her strangely vague and indirect grandparents?

Whatever it is, your anxieties never really go unnoticed despite your efforts.

“Hey (Y/N), what’s on your mind?”

There are some things that go unnoticed until it comes to a head of course – especially your clinginess. Tamarack’s been known you for years, at some point your habits would become a lot less noticeable.

You’d ask her a lot about her day. What did she do? Who did you hang out with? Where were you?

It was never meant to be suffocating at all, and for a while it hadn’t been.

Tamarack herself hadn’t picked up on the way your behaviors were affecting her until her omi made a small comment on how funny it was that recently she’d started talking about everything she’d done that day at the table again. She hadn’t done that since the beginning of middle school.

For a while, it kept Tamarack thinking. What made her start all that again? Why did she feel a little guilty if she didn’t tell you something? More and more thoughts ran through her head until she realized your behavior was the cause.

She wasn’t mad about it at all though. Maybe a little bit annoyed that she hadn’t caught on sooner, but it was more sympathetic emotions than any other kind.

On one of your pre-planned hangout days, she figures it’s time to address everything going on, even if it isn’t easy.

She sits you both down with some tea and snacks outside like usual when she brings it up. When she did, she noticed that even you were shocked.

It took some time working past the initial wall of denial and anxiety, however, you both reached a comfortable point in your conversation where Tamarack suggested things that she hopes will help you rely on her a little less. You also become able to communicate with her much healthier than you had been.

She’s always here for you, just remember that other people are too and that there are plenty of activities to do together and separately.

With time she notices you’re a lot less codependent, and she makes sure to tell you how proud she is of you for it.

My personal HC is that Tamarack is a little awkward with PDA and affection in general, so that’s why there’s a lot less of that in here. It’s also another reason I could imagine you being so clingy and anxious about your relationship.

Despite her difficulty with affection, she remembers some of your own soul-searching you did before confessing that you wish she was a little more affectionate.

With time, you both reach a much better point of both communication and satisfaction in the relationship. You’ve been doing a little more things on your own or with others which helps quiet your still-standing thoughts, and Tamarack has slowly nudged her way into a level of affection that felt just right with plenty of room for improvement.

Relationships are always in a growing stage, just like people are too. If either of you starts slipping up, it’s reassuring to know that while you won’t be coddled and held the entire way, there’s a hand willing to help you up and brush off the dust from the fall.

<3

Post Writing Note: Apologies if this isn't quite what y'all want or if they feel OOC, they feel OOC for me too *sobs* I'm sort of rusty with HCs, and also I don't know much about Qiu and Tama step 3...Regardless, thanks for reading, and don't feel too shy to send in an ask!

[ramblingoak]

Satan’s Toy Box

Hello anon!  Thank you for the prompt and I hope you enjoy what I came up with!  

~ As the owner of the local sex toy shop you find yourself developing a crush on a Cardinal from the local Satanic church ~

The prompt was: attempting to find out if they are single/available

Cardinal Copia x GN Reader (nsfw, 18+, mdni)

~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

Today was going to be the day.

You had been working up the courage for months at this point, ever since the man had first walked into your store.  He was definitely handsome, if a little old fashioned.  Not many people sported sideburns and mustaches anymore, but he pulled them both off.  It made him seem distinguished, especially with the salt and pepper strands creeping in at his temples. 

He was older than who you usually went for.  Of course maybe that was a good idea given your recent track record.  It seemed like most people your age weren’t ready to settle down yet.  You weren’t exactly looking to settle down yourself, the thought of a white picket fence and 2.5 kids was vaguely terrifying if you were being honest.  Unfortunately the main obstacle in your dating life was where you worked: Satan’s Toy Box.

It was rather irritating how fast some people would leave after learning you owned a sex supply shop.  You really didn’t know what the big deal was.  Some people were still way too hung up on topics surrounding sex.  It seemed like you either got people that were immediately turned off at the news or they thought you personally experimented with every item you sold.

Although honestly that wasn’t too far from the truth.

I mean, you had your limits, but you were taught that it was important for a business owner to know their product.  First hand experience and all that.  So if your products happened to be sex toys, so be it.  You’d never been one to shy away from some adventure in the bedroom.  Or out of it even.

Setting up shop in a town that also had a Satanic Church had seemed like a brilliant idea.  Kind of like Girl Scouts selling cookies right outside pot dispensaries.  It was a match made in Heaven.  Well, Hell.  Whatever.  Anyway, the various church members were regulars in your shop.  Siblings of Sin as they were called, people in masks called Ghouls, a few men in skull paint that called themselves ‘Papa’ and the man you had been trying to build up the courage to ask out: Cardinal Copia.

So yes, when Copia had waltzed into your store for the first time in a tight red suit you had been immediately interested.  He cut an interesting figure, what with the facial hair and the paint around his eyes and on his upper lip.  You had been behind the front counter and called out a welcome, but the poor man had been startled at your sudden voice and walked right into a display of neon butt plugs.

His cheeks had turned the same color of his suit and he tripped over an apology while trying to pick up the display.  You had rushed over to help, assuring him it was no problem while desperately trying not to stare at his face.  His Italian accent was giving you thoughts and it was possible when your hands both reached for the same neon pink butt plug you already had hearts in your eyes.

It was like you were starring in a Hallmark movie.

After everything had been cleaned up he had introduced himself and mentioned he was there to pick up an order for the church.  The transaction had gone quickly, only a little small talk before he had left with his large order of lube.  It was really adorable how often he felt the need to clarify it was for the church and not just him.  Like it mattered to you, you liked a man that was prepared.

By now though months had passed and you were fairly embarrassed with yourself that you hadn’t asked him out yet.  You just kept thinking he probably had some cute young sibling at the abbey.  Probably multiple siblings.  Why would he want to settle with one person when he was surrounded by beautiful people literally there to sin 24/7?  Plus you didn’t want to make things awkward, he was a regular customer after all. 

It’s just…what if he was interested as well?  He definitely had a flirty vibe whenever you spoke, but it’s possible he was just being nice.  There had been a few times he’d come in with some of the Ghouls and both times it looked like they had been arguing, only speaking in fierce whispers.  You wouldn’t have necessarily thought it was about you, but the last time they had been in the shop you overheard one of them tell Copia to ‘grow a pair’.

That had been what really drove you to decide that today was it, you were going to ask Cardinal Copia out on a date.  He was going to (maybe) say yes, you both would later have (probably) amazing sex and then in a year or so you’d (possibly) have that white picket fence everyone seemed to be clamoring for.  Or whatever the Satanic equivalent was, you weren’t going to be picky.

You had been doing laps around the shop all morning.  Dusting shelves and straightening products.  Making sure the movies were organized by genre and then alphabetized within each section.  The store hadn’t even been this clean when you first opened it.  As you made another meandering lap by the front door you stopped when you heard raised voices.

Creeping closer you peeked through the window expecting to see maybe a group of religious nuts or protestors, something you’d unfortunately dealt with before.  Instead what you saw was the Cardinal and a few of the Ghouls seemingly arguing with each other.  Not really wanting them to continue making a scene on the sidewalk, you swung the door open to ask if everything was ok, but Copia’s raised voice stopped you in your tracks.

“For the last time I’m not a virgin!”

Copia’s back was to you as he faced the other two, but you could see him tense up when the sound of the bell on your door registered.  One of the Ghoul’s immediately hung their head, the other covered their mouth with their hands to try and hide their laughter.  Honestly you wanted to laugh too, you could only imagine the look on poor Copia’s face.  He slowly turned around and his shoulders sagged when he saw you.  

“Good to know, Cardinal.”  You felt a little bad teasing him, but you also could have said something much, much worse.  He was lucky you liked him so much.  “Come on in!  I’ve got your order ready for you.”

You heard him mutter something to the Ghouls but they all trailed behind you inside the store.  The Ghouls took off to different corners, but Copia stayed behind you.  When he cleared his throat you turned nearly causing him to run into you.

“Cara mia, I’m not.  Uh, you know.”

“You’re not what?”

“A virgin.”

You gave him a soft smile, really it didn’t matter to you either way.  Experienced lovers were great but being able to teach someone was also great.  Really, really great.

“Oh well, it’s ok if you are.  I won’t judge.”

Copia fidgeted for a moment and reached a hand out to rest it on the nearby butt plug display.  The damn thing wasn’t very sturdy to do that, which he should know, so a few of the plugs fell off and clattered onto the floor.  You dug your teeth into your lip to stop from laughing, watching as he hurried to pick them up and get them back where they belonged.

“That’s very kind of you, but again, I’m not.”

He got everything back in place and then brushed his hands on the front of his suit, awkwardly resting them on his hips when he was done.  You couldn’t help but let your eyes wander over him for a moment because really, those suits were a gift.  When Copia cleared his throat you quickly looked back up at his face.

“Ok.  Um, cool.”

God, why were you still talking about this?  Cool?  He would never agree to go on a date with you now.  You sighed and gave him a brief smile before turning to get behind the counter and grab the church’s delivery.  ‘Yeah it’s super cool you aren’t a virgin, here’s the ten bottles of lube you ordered, have a great time’.  You were such an idiot.  Grunting you picked up the box and then set it on the counter. 

“Uh, actually, I had something I’ve been meaning to ask you.”  You glanced up from the box, watching as he nervously rubbed his hands together.  What could he possibly be nervous about?  He opened his mouth to continue but one of the Ghoul’s jogged up and slammed something down next to the box.

“Hey Boss, found the tentacle dildo you wanted.”

Copia immediately let loose a string of Italian and shoved the Ghoul away.

“For fucks sake Dewdrop would you piss off?!  Aether!”  The other Ghoul hurried up to the front, taking one look at the dildo then at the other Ghoul and sighed.

Aether grabbed the box and shoved it into Dewdrop’s hands.  He then grabbed the Ghoul by his shoulders and started pulling him out of the store.  Dewdrop was dragging and kicking his feet as he went, one kick sending the butt plug display flying and really, maybe you should just put that thing out of its misery.  You looked over to Copia, his cheeks as red as his suit as he looked at all the plugs scattered across the floor.  Again.

“Kids these days, huh?”  

Copia snorted and when you made your way around to pick everything up he leaned down and started helping you.

“I’m sorry, cara mia.  The Ghouls are a little uh, rambunctious.”

“No worries, we’re old hands at fixing this thing by now.”

You turned to smile at him, your smile growing when you saw that his cheeks were still red.  He picked up the last plug on the floor, but stared down at it for a moment before speaking.

“I feel like I’m always bringing chaos with me when I visit.”  Copia nibbled his lip briefly before handing the plug over.  “Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?”

Oh if he only knew.  You stared at him for a moment, your mind going a mile a minute as you tried to get the courage to ask him out.

“Coffee?”

“Oh, si!  I can go get you a coffee!”

Shit.  You took a deep breath and reached a hand out to touch his arm.

“No, I meant, do you want to get a coffee…with me?”  Copia stood there for a moment, his mouth open and you instantly had a sinking feeling in your gut.  Fuck.  Ok, fuck.  That wasn’t what he meant, of course he would just want to go get you a coffee.  “I’m sorry, Cardinal!  That was unprofessional of me.  Just forget I said anything, let me get your receipt.”

As you started to rush by he shot out a hand and grasped your elbow.  You looked up at him, taking in his handsome features for what you hoped wasn’t the last time.

“What if I don’t want to?  Forget it, I mean.”

It took every ounce of self control you had not to start doing a little dance.

“So you do want to get coffee?  Together?”

“Si, si.  But I was actually hoping we could have dinner instead, would that be alright?”

Holy fuck.

“Yes!  I mean yes, dinner would be great.”

“Bene!  Molto bene.”  Copia was positively beaming at you and you probably looked exactly the same.  “Would tomorrow night work, cara?”

“Yes, that would be great.  I close at 6 so anytime after that.”

“Okie dokie, I will be here at 6.  Then dinner.”

You were afraid to open your mouth again and let out the ridiculous screeching sound you wanted to make so you just smiled wider and hurried off toward the counter.  When you turned with the receipt in your hand you bumped right into his chest, not realizing he had followed you.

“Oh, sorry Cardinal!”

Ugh, could you embarrass yourself any more today?  Copia didn’t seem bothered though, he took the receipt from you with one hand and with the other he pulled your hand to his mouth.  He placed a quick kiss on the back, smiling softly at you after.

“It’s Copia to you, cara mia.”  He dropped another kiss onto your hand and then slowly started walking backwards toward the door.  Copia looked a little smug watching as your hand remained frozen in the air.  “I’ll see you tomorrow night.”

You were grinning like an idiot now, barely holding in the dreamy sigh that was desperately wanting to come out.  Copia gave you an equally goofy smile back and then spun on his heel to leave.  Unfortunately he ran right into the display again and once more your floor was covered in neon colored butt plugs.

Ok, maybe not exactly like a Hallmark movie, but close enough for you.

~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~

my masterlist

my ao3

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Staying up late with you, RPG (3)

Summary: Kuroki Yuuya, Enma Yuuken, and Asaka Yuuki all find themselves dragged into their favorite piece of media. They're all… coping. If you can call it that.

Pt2

Asaka Yuuki was having a time.

She had woken up in a coffin, which was already a 0/10 experience, but it seemed that she had also been dragged into her computer to become a part of her favorite game.

Which should be fun! It was her favorite game for a reason!

Unfortunately for her, it was a fighting game, and she was not prepared to get her ass beat. Multiple times.

And that ‘multiple times’ thing was just assuming she had Save Points. If she didn’t… well, she supposed she would just die. Funnily enough, this wasn’t something she particularly wanted to test out.

Hence why she had run away from the fight with Grim. He wouldn’t kill the player, he was there to rough you up a little while you get used to the game’s fighting system, but that was not appealing to her. She’d much rather stack up on healing pots and then head into the woods on campus to up her EXP.

After all, she would have a pretty tough battle ahead of her tomorrow… or was it the day after? She had never paid all that much attention to the so-called ’plot’ of the game. It was barebones at best, only there to justify all of the fight scenes the player would get into. But, now, she wished she had, at the very least, studied the timings for things.

Whatever!

She needed healing potions! Sooner rather than later! That was the point!

She let her feet carry her through NRC. It was a little strange, no longer seeing pixelated hallways, but the game was the magical equivalent of a First Person Shooter, so it wasn’t too different.

She felt her phone buzz in her pocket and pulled it out, mildly confused.

Kuroki has started a chat with you! Welcome!

Kuroki: Are you one of the other people from the coffin

She stared for a moment, before typing out her answer.

Asaka: yep

She watched him type for a minute, the three dots at the bottom of her screen popping up and then fading away repeatedly, before disappearing entirely.

Just when she was about to put her phone away again, she was added to a new group chat.

Kuroki started a group chat! Welcome to ‘HELP’. 

Kuroki: Guys, quick, I need help

Asaka changed the name to ‘what the fuck is going on’.

Enma changed the name to ‘No cursing, please.’.

How can someone play video games and not be used to cursing? Like, you can choose not to curse yourself, but trying to stop others from cursing is wild.

Her lips twitched into a grin.

Asaka changed the name to ‘fuck fuck fuck’.

Enma changed the name to ‘What is going on?’.

Kuroki: Guys

Asaka changed the name to ‘bastard’.

Kuroki: Seriously

Oh! Kuroki was trying to talk, whoops, she hadn’t noticed the first time…s, apparently. Sorry, Kuroki. She had assumed he was just making a group chat so Enma and Asaka could get each other’s numbers, or in case they needed to help each other out in the future.

Enma changed the name to ‘What is going on?’.

Well, that was just rude to Kuroki.

Kuroki: Okay. I’m just going to talk over you Kuroki: Where in the body would you say the soul is

Asaka hesitated, her head tipping to the side.

She had, honestly, never believed in souls, she had never really considered where it would be located…

Enma: Do I want to know why?  Kuroki: Just tell me, please Enma: The heart, maybe?

Her nose scrunched up.

Asaka: wouldnt it just be all over Asaka: why would it be concentrated in one place Asaka: if you get a transplant do you swap souls Kuroki: I’m deciding that it’s in the brain

What the fuck?!

She politely censored herself (somewhat) for Enma’s sake.

Asaka: what the hell Enma: Why even ask at that point?

Thank you, Enma! She may be weirded out by his hatred of swear words, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t agree that their opinions were being unjustifiably suppressed!

The group chat was silent for a while, so she glanced up to make sure she hadn’t veered off-course while she was texting-and-walking, and was pleased to find that she still knew where she was. It wasn’t that surprising, the game was a magical FPS game, after all, she had already traversed the halls of the school many times, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t be proud of herself.

It also meant that she could continue looking through her phone.

Absently, she wondered if she could still use her old world’s internet, because access to a guide would be nice. But, a glance at the top of her phone said the answer was definitely not. Which kind of sucked. She was in a computer, she should be able to connect to wi-fi!

Whatever. She wasn’t perfect at the game, but there were probably books that she could read here, so if she ever forgot something she could just refer to those.

She got a notification.

Kuroki: Told you

What was he talking about?

Enma: The mirror was probably just being polite.

Ohhhhh. She had forgotten about the whole ‘where is the soul’ debate already.

Asaka: wait seriously he was right Asaka: that sucks Asaka: still makes sense more than heart though

Enma didn’t respond to her little jab, so she tucked her phone away once again and then concentrated on finding the Alchemy room.

Which wasn’t that hard. The school was big, but it wasn’t that big – she was practically already there. And, when she did finally reach it, she didn’t hesitate to start sifting through the ingredients. She didn’t need a guide, she had this potion memorized, at least.

The door slammed against the wall, and she found herself lifted off of the floor in a gust of wind magic, pulled off of her feet and tipped upside down.

She shrieked, almost dropping the Blooming Onion (not the dish, a magical version) in her surprise.

Only to find a man staring at her, wide-eyed.

“A girl?” Professor Crewel said.

Oh wait.

This was an all-boys school, wasn’t it?

She hadn’t really taken note of it when she was playing the game. Tons of games had male main characters, and even when there were female options she had never really bothered with it (male characters tended to have cooler armor), but now that she was here…

“Excuse me! My pronouns are he/him!” she said, panic making her voice raise higher, which was not helping her case.

Crewel blinked at her.

“Oh, sorry,” he said.

He believed that?!

Not that she was complaining! But what?!

“What were you doing in my storage closet?” Crewel said, recovering quickly. Unfortunately.

She worried her lip. “I – uh –.”

There was a mechanic in the game to get you out of situations like this, but she wasn’t sure that they would work. She wasn’t actively injured, so she couldn’t say she was desperate. It wasn’t even the first day of school, so she couldn’t pretend she was trying to get a head start on her studies, she wasn’t supposed to have the syllabus yet! And she sure as hell couldn’t fight a teacher at this point.

What other options were there?!

She felt tears prick at the corners of her eyes.

Crewel’s own eyes widened in horror.

Well, that works, apparently.

“I – I don’t know why I’m here,” she said, swallowing thickly. “I don’t even have magic! The mirror made a mistake, but I’m here now, so I needpotionstomakeupforit –!”

“Just – stop talking!”

She could do that.

Crewel sighed. “I’m going to take you to the Headmaster.”

‘This is not my problem,” Asaka translated.

But it would soon become her problem, because now that she wasn’t in immediate danger she had new priorities: getting out of mandatory cutscenes. The not-so-subtle exposition scenes in the game had been long enough even when she didn’t know the information, now that she did it would be torture.

Ughhhhhh ESC ESC ESC.

~

… why was she outside of a haunted house with Dire Crowley?

Crowley turned to her, smiling. “Admiring the dorm’s character?”

Asaka nodded, a little numb. She had never really thought about how that would feel as a real person. She hadn’t even thought it would work.

“It – it sure has a lot of it,” she said, slowly, her eyes flicking away from Crowley, to look at Ramshackle Dorm.

There were ghosts inside, and she would be expected to beat them up. She hadn’t yet learned how to beat up characters. She was not eager to go in. She hadn’t gained any EXP yet, she would not win a fight like this…

But there were hands on her back, ushering her forward, and she didn’t know how to stop what was about to happen, not without outright admitting this entire place was a game, and that was, practically, illegal in stories like this.

The door was ajar when they finally reached it, swinging open further as they approached. A dull shiver ran through her.

“Probably the wind, right?” she said, because she wasn’t supposed to know about the ghosts yet.

Though it didn’t seem like she would have to pretend for long.

Because the moment they stepped into the living room, they found one of the other Players chatting merrily with the ghosts. He glanced up at the new people, and for a moment just stared, his eyes wide.

“Asaka-san?” he said, slowly, clearly trying to think but failing oh no the Headmaster was going to think they were spies or something they were going to be homeless –.

“Is this another dimension-traveler, Yuuki-kun?”

What are you even talking about? Asaka thought. She should not have skipped all of those cutscenes, whoops.

She nodded along, though. “We were scared you wouldn’t be understanding of our situation, so we were preparing to hide out here so we wouldn’t become homeless.”

Crowley stared at the pair of them for a second.

And then he smiled. “That makes sense!”

Asaka loved having plot armor.

[futuregws]

I find it annoying when these instamodels want to play coy and dumb when they know they want to continue to stir the pot and have people speculating. I’m not even going to name the instamodel that I’m referring to, but saw what some people have been referring to and she says out loud about “how do people even know…” when clearly you keep hinting so that’s how people know or at least speculating.

I hate being that person trying to analyze a stranger but I have this feeling that Lando generally likes and wants to keep things quiet. When the girls start the hinting game I have a feeling he probably continues the relationship but deep down I wouldn’t be surprised if he has already decided this is just the “woman for now” and not “forever”. I have a feeling when he finally meets someone that doesn’t play the hinty games it might make for a genuine long term connection for him and essentially “passes his test”. He does seem like someone who cares about who is genuine and not just being used as he made a point about it during the red flag green flag game with Oscar.

I mean I could be completely wrong and off base. Maybe he has no issues with these hinting clout chasers. I lean Lui was no saint. She definitely played the hinty game before he announced her as his sunshine lol.

It’s a dangerous game to be dating an instamodel when their whole thing is they need to continue to stay relevant by any means necessary to maintain that cash-flow. There is competition cropping up every second for them and I am starting to see why Charles never stays single for long and picks from a small pool of women. Imagine if he did what Lando did it would be exhausting the amount of women who would try to link themselves to him and try to profit off of speculation and rumors.

Lui and a some of the other ex-wags have shown that even after a breakup they can still continue their rise to success.

I'm gonna be honest I'm not sure who you are talking about, bc there's just way too many people that have been mentioned to me so could be any of them or maybe someone new, honestly I don't even know if I wanna find out lmao, but I'm gonna be honest I agree with some of the stuff you said but not with other stuff, let's say that this models do use the hinting thing to get attention, with what I've seen with all the girls mentioned to me, none or at least most of them haven't even met him or barely hang out so the fans are to blame to a certain extent bc they are the ones grabbing said hints and making it more than it is, I feel like most of the times it started as something innocent but that coincidentally fans saw some ridiculous connection to Lando so they went with it and then did it on purpose 🤷🏼‍♀️ and I also do believe that some people do take that "hinting game" a little too far bc sometimes all they need to do is have Lando follow them and then make a TikTok mentioning an experience with a random guy and all of a sudden it's the girl hinting at him, for example with that olivia girl and lily when it could be anyone at all but fans will only focus on Lando

[secretxxpaladaiseu]

How to Become a Reaper

Trigger Warning for self-harm and mentions of murder.

Unrest had been building for a while. Frustrations from feeling as if they were working for nothing were swelling up in the village that her father's home overlooked. The village that her father was in charge of, and that he was beyond greedy with. Everyone tried changing his ways, to change his mind, but he refused to listen to even his wife and daughters through the years.

Nicha learned faster than the rest of her family how useless it was to argue with the man. He truly didn't seem to have regard for any life but his own, and it showed time and time again. Running away had crossed her mind several times, to get away from all of this, but that was harder than it sounded. She was a noble, a very prominent one at that. Her father was well known and even praised in the highest of political circles, and even gained regular audiences with the king. If she ran away, it was almost inevitable that someone would recognize her and simply send her back home. Then she'd face her father's wrath, and her life would become even more of a tar pit trap than it was now. He wasn't above severe punishment, or perhaps even marrying her off to someone he knew was terrible. She hated her life, but there was still a part of her that held hope for it to get better.

Hope that had a terrible answer.

Starting months before, she had overheard some of her family's servants talking. Gossip from a merchant that regularly brought supplies to the home. He was warning them of an uprising being planned, that the villagers wanted to finally make their work worth their while by taking out the family they blamed for their woes. It was unfortunate news, terrifying news, but it was also fairly rare that she heard gossip like this. Gossip that the servants actually attempted to hide. Nicha didn't want to keep it to herself, she couldn't keep it to herself. Her family's safety was being threatened.

Of course, she honestly didn't feel scared for her father. The man was horrible, but the rest of her family…Her mother and siblings. She loved them deeply, and was desperate to protect them. Unfortunately, they wouldn't leave. They refused to budge from her father's side when she told them the gossip. Her elder brother even dismissed it as typical gossip that wasn't worth putting anything into.

For weeks, she tried to decide what to do, if she could even do anything…But she thought too long. The rumors continued among the servants, but with more details being given seemingly with each passing day. Her father soon caught wind of the gossip as well, and he began paying more attention to his village. He sent more patrols, and kept his eyes open at night to look for anything suspicious. Nothing did seem out of place, however. The villagers went to work, and seemed to go to bed each night like normal. Everything seemed normal. Normal until one night, when he noticed one of the houses in the village being fully lit.

He sent his guards as soon as he could, but they didn't return. A small patrol that was easily overwhelmed by the loud yelling of the villagers that were finally carrying out their plan. Even though it was far away, the sounds could all be heard even in their home.

The entire family was awakened, and began panicking once they realized what was going on. Everyone except Nicha. Nicha knew what the sounds were, and what was happening. While her brothers and father quickly set off to properly call for their army, as well as arming themselves for the conflict, Nicha ordered a pot of tea to be sent to her room. It was a request that confused her servant, but was carried out nonetheless.

Nicha was in the process of putting on her best clothing when the tea was brought in, being set on the small table that sat next to her window.

"Take everything you want, but wait an hour." Yet another request that absolutely baffled the young female servant.

"Are you…Sure?"

"Yes. I'm not going to need them. My father's gold, reason with them to distribute it appropriately. Make sure families with children get more than those who don't. Now leave." With that, the servant backed out of the room, still completely confused as to what her mistress was planning.

As she finished with her outfit, hair and all, she finally took her seat at the table and opened the pot of tea. She grabbed a small powder jar from the table and poured it's contents into the teapot, making sure it was well stirred in with the tea. Then, she poured the first cup.

She seemed to savor that first cup, enjoying the flavors of the tea as she looked out at the garden and admired the flowers and trees that grew there. Behind her, she could hear the yelling that was starting to move closer to the house. She could only imagine what it would sound like when they finally reached the home.

The yelling and clanging, screaming and footsteps grew closer with each cup of tea. As she poured the last and final cup, she could already feel the poison beginning to take effect. Her stomach felt awful, but she had to make sure. Nicha refused to see her family's bodies paraded around, or to see their blood spilled on the floor and walls. It was inevitable at this point, as she heard her father yelling some sort of orders down the hallway. The tea was growing cold at this point, so this final cup couldn't be savored like the first four. Instead, it was quickly drank like someone would a cup of alcohol, her head beginning to swim.

Her own end wasn't going to be as pretty as she would've liked, but that wasn't how poison worked. It never worked in a simple and beautiful way, it only twisted one's insides until life was gone. Something that she was hoping would be quick with the amount that she had taken.

It wasn't too long after her teacup had touched the table that she could feel it taking it's hold. As she stood up to try and make her way towards her bed, she quickly realized it was too far away even if only a few feet away. Her body suddenly dropped to the floor, her hands gripping at the ornate carpet as she began coughing. Her pale lips were soon tainted red from the blood that came out, splattering onto her hands and the carpet beneath her. The coughing felt neverending, and quickly began hurting her chest and shoulders. Her fingers curled tightly as she stared down at the floor that grew blurrier by the second. Just as quickly, it was no longer just her shoulders and chest that hurt, but her throat and stomach as well. Her muscles were giving up, and soon a pile of blood red bile was beneath her.

Finally, she could feel it, and in a last bit of vanity, she let herself roll onto her back as she closed her eyes. She was only able to cough a few more times before it was finally all over. Everything was over for her, and she felt a sense of peace that she had heard rumored by people who claimed to have died and come back. A peace that comforted her final few seconds of life.

=============

Wait. How did she survive??? How was she here right now? Where the hell even was she?

Nicha woke up in a strange looking room, on an elegant looking, European style bed. A veil covered each side of it, and the bedding was rather plain in contrast. Simple black bedding, which her pale skin stood out against alongside the…Clothes? Were these clothes that she was wearing? They barely covered her skin, and certainly weren't keeping her modest should someone walk in.

This wasn't Thailand. This wasn't even her house, and absolutely not her bedroom. So where the hell was she?

Someone soon entered the room, carrying a stack of clothing in their hands that they set neatly next to her bed. "Nicha…You should put these on when you're ready, and someone will be in soon to see you." "…Who are you? Who's coming to see me?!"

These words…She knew what she was saying, but what came out of her mouth didn't sound like a language she knew. Nor did she know how she understood what the other woman had said to her, but she did. Nothing was making sense, and she could feel a headache growing from the confusion.

The woman left without another word, closing the door behind herself. Climbing out of the bed, Nicha decided to look over the stack of clothes that were set out for her, managing to figure out how to put on the t-shirt and shorts. The dark red of the shirt actually looked nice on her, as well as the deep blue denim of the shorts, at least in her opinion. They were also quite comfortable, allowing for more movement and air than the clothing she was used to. It's like they were an upgraded version of peasant's clothing, and she wasn't upset at all by it.

"Nicha…" Someone else called out her name now, someone she hadn't heard come in. This time it was a male, who was dressed in yet another strange set of clothing. A suit and tie, that she couldn't recall ever seeing someone wear before. Like the servant that had brought her the clothes, she found herself able to understand the sentences that came from the man, in the same language that the servant had spoken to her in.

"Nicha, you're not mistaken…You have died, but your soul isn't yet ready for judgement. Don't worry, though. We'll make sure that you aren't wandering around with nothing to do. There's plenty for you to do, and we'll eventually get you acclimated to do them. For now, you should work on relaxing and exploring, so you can adjust to your new life."

She couldn't recall the rest of the conversation, though there certainly was one. Questions that Nicha had plenty of, and answers that the man had plenty of. After that, the days passed by without quite feeling like it, and for a month or so she was allowed to move freely throughout the building. It was all just one, giant building with several gardens outside. There was nothing outside of those gardens, though. Of course, it stopped mattering that there was nothing else outside of the gardens. There was more than enough to keep her interested and sated.

It was shortly after she achieved that sated state that she was finally introduced to what her task would be. What was going to be expected of her until her judgement came. IF it came.

At first, she spent her time in a library like office, transcribing documents that were passed through. Records upon records of people who were still living on Earth, and what all had been done in recent times. It was a task that sounded quite monotonous and boring, but there was something exciting about learning about all these lives and making sure they were secured in the endless shelves of books. Eventually, though, she was given a promotion of sorts.

Instead of simply recording the different souls in the world, she would be collecting them. That was a task that she dislike upon first hearing about it. She would have to chase humans on their dying days and make sure not to let their souls escape into the world. It wasn't expected for her to catch all of them in the city she was assigned, but that still didn't ease the sound of the task.

A task that was just as painful as it sounded to her. Most of the time, she had to show up at the scenes of brutality. Murders and terrible accidents that no one could have predicted, except the Fates. The ones who assigned her such a task. The Fates knew everything, and that only became more clear as time went on. They were mysterious, and no one had seen them face to face with the exception of their Voices, or messengers.

Finally, as she began to become somewhat hardened to the job she had been assigned, they changed once again. Now, she would get a direct list and clear indications of who the Fates wanted collected. Being assigned to the bar, and with a new nickname of Minie for the cartoon character she had come to love, she was now in charge of manually ending the lives to collect souls. No longer did she have to roam the streets to look for them, but instead she was tasked with properly poisoning them and collecting. It was yet another task she had to harden herself to, and she did. It took several years, but finally…She could think almost nothing of her task.

[thestayathomedragon]

Another Winterberg Fic Idea I will probably never write...

Ethan and Karl work tech support in a call center.

Ethan is a software guy and Karl is a hardware guy.

They sit right in front of each other because they’re respective teams sit next to each other and Karl is one of the agents who sits on the boarder.

I might include other RE Village folks.

Chris is definitely a supervisor and so is Alcina. Miranda is a manager: Chris and Alcina’s direct supervisor.

Alcina has never worked the phones here. She’s got management experience and that’s all that matters.

Chris has been on the phones but it’s been years and you know how tech changes quickly, he’s got the basics but not the nuances of the new tech, etc. He’s perpetually tired, drinks way too much coffee and pretty much lets his team do what they want as long as their numbers are good. They are.

Alcina is a stickler for customer care. She is always on Ethan’s ass because he is a honey badger and gives no fucks but somehow still excellent at his job. The only reason he still has a job though is because he doesn’t really talk to customers he talks to field techs. And well as long as they get the answers they need field techs don’t really complain. They don’t want to bring any attention to themselves of course.

Karl unfortunately talks to customers, he is one of those techs that has to walk customers through troubleshooting steps and he’s very good at it, customers really like his voice, he’s gotten hit on so many times he’d be rich if he had a dime for each time. Male and Female, all ages.

Ethan’s got a pretty good voice if he didn’t sound so dead inside all the time. Karl thinks it’s cute. He loves hearing Ethan give the techs shit for being lazy and/or dumb. He can’t believe he gets away with some of the shit he says to them.

Ethan eventually warms up to Karl. They have the same shift, go to lunch at the same time. Ethan is recently divorced from his college sweetheart, Mia.

“Yeah I went to college and this is the job I ended up with.”

He has an infant daughter. EX is a liar and cheat, but the daughter, Rosemary, is his. Paternity test plus she looks just like him. Karl never finished college, ran out of money.

Ethan dresses business casual. Wears jeans only on Fridays but always with a nice button up and oxfords. Karl dresses just rolled out of bed casual. He has been known to wear his pjs to work. He always smells nice though. Ethan doesn’t know how he manages it. No one can really tell the difference between Karl’s pjs and his regular clothes though honestly. The man wears sweatpants to work, gray ones, so no one really complains. And flip flops. Sneakers sometimes. But he’s been seen in flip flops in the winter and rain. The man will wear shorts to work. With boots. The season also doesn’t matter.

Alcina hates him based off his fashion sense alone. It annoys Chris but since there is no dress code he can’t really do anything about it. Miranda is trying to get a dress code enacted but as of yet it’s still not on the books.

Ethan thinks it’s funny. He’s always commenting on Karl’s t-shirts. He has quite the collection of novelty shirts. If a shirt says something inappropriate, he just tapes over it.

Karl frequently forgets his badge and tailgates all the time. Ethan always gives him shit every time it’s him.

“I have a kid to feed, Karl. I can’t lose my job because you can’t be bothered to keep up with a piece of plastic on a lanyard. Seriously, you can literally hang it around your neck if it’s that difficult to keep up with it.”

“My dog ate it.”

“Well, get another one. They’re free.”

“I don’t need to the boss lady finding out how irresponsible I am now do I?”

“I pretty sure that ship has sailed, Karl.”

I want to write this so bad.

Imagine the interteam pot luck. LMAO.

If anyone wants to steal the idea or even add to this feel free!

[robbybirdy]

46. Baking therapy on a budget Ft. Genshin Characters: Nilou

Hello, every birdy. Today we are going to be looking at my birthday cake. Obviously, I am not saying that I make my own cake. Jeez, no… my mom wouldn’t do that to me. No. what I am saying is that this recipe has been my favorite recipe since we got an Instant Pot. And I like it because no matter what it always tastes amazing. 

Nilou is a stage dancer from Sumeru. She says that her favorite food is anything sweet, honestly, this is one of the easiest things people could say. 

We got sour cream, cream cheese, and a box of white chocolate chip macadam nut cookie dough from the truck this week. And after studying these ingredients and making the cookies by themselves, we had a bunch of cookies left over. 

My mom and I made the “Instant Pot New York Cheesecake #17” by Amy & Jacky. This recipe is one of my favorites. 

The recipe will be in the description down below. You can use the crust recipe on the recipe. 

However, because we had so much cookie dough, we decided to make the cookie dough into the crust. We baked the cookie in the pan we were going to place in the instant pot and we baked it according to the instructions on the box. I should note that we used a small springform pan that will fit into the instant pot. And we also have a sling that helps us get it out when it is done. 

What you will need for this recipe:

Cream cheese

Eggs

White sugar

Sour cream 

Cornstarch 

Vanilla extract 

Sea salt 

The first thing that the recipe states are to use a hand mixer instead of a Stand mixer. This is because the stand mixer is most of the time more powerful and it is easy to over-mix and add too much air to the cheesecake. This would make the cheesecake more souffle-like. 

30-40 minutes prior to making the cheesecake, you will want to bring your cream cheese, 2 eggs, sour cream, and 3 - 4 tablespoons of melted butter at room temperature. 

This helps your cheesecake be the yummiest, so make sure not to skip this step. 

Because we are using cookie dough, we are going to skip the graham cracker crust instructions. But if you want to make the graham cracker crust feel free to check out the recipe down below. 

Now we are going to make the cheesecake batter. 

In a small mixing bowl, you are going to mix together 2 tablespoons of cornstarch, 2 pinches of salt, and ⅔ cup of white sugar. 

In different medium sized mixing bowl you are going to briefly break up the cream cheese for about 10 seconds with a hand mixer on low speed. 

Now you are going to add half of your sugar mixture to the cream cheese, for about 20-30 seconds. Make sure that you scrape down the sides of the bowl. Add in the remaining sugar mixture and beat it until everything is just incorporated on low speed, about 20-30 seconds. 

Add in half of a cup of sour cream and 2 teaspoons of vanilla extract to the cream cheese mixture. Beat everything on low speed for 20-30 seconds. 

Next, you will add in your two eggs. Mixing them together one egg at a time. Mix until just incorporated, about 15-20 seconds. Try not to mix in this step. 

Fold everything together until fully incorporated. 

And then pour the batter into your pan with the crust in it. 

On the counter you are going to let the air bubbles rise to the surface and with a toothpick or a knife you are going to burst the air bubbles. Repeat this process until you are satisfied with it. 

Now onto the baking part of this recipe. This recipe does use the instant pot. 

Pour 1 cup of water into your Instant Pot. Place your pan in your sling, if you have oen, and place it on a steamer rack making sure that it not touching the water. 

Close the lids and pressure cook on high for 26 minutes. And wait for it to do a full natural release. Which will take about 7 minutes. Open the lid gradually, making sure not to add any moisture to the cheesecake. 

With a paper towel or a clean kitchen dishcloth, you are going to carefully absorb any condensation on the surface by lightly tapping it. 

Allow the cheesecake to cool completely at room temperature. After about 10-15 minutes you are going to carefully run a thin knife between the sidewall and the parchment paper to release the cheesecake from the pan. 

You will want to make this recipe a day ahead of time so that it can completely chill. The recipe says that it needs to be refrigerated for at least 4-8 hours, most preferably it needs to be chilled overnight. We placed this cheesecake in the freezer until we were going to serve it, and it tasted just as good. 

And enjoy. 

We have had an Instant Pot in our house since about 2018 I want to say. And as soon as my mom found this recipe I knew that it was going to be my birthday cake for a while. Just because I love cheesecake. I mean, this recipe is so versatile, and it can change so much. One of the versions I had for this cheesecake was a dirt cake version. 

What I mean by this was, I told my mom that I really wanted a grown-up cake. A dirt cake. A cake that had crushed up Oreos, chocolate pudding, and gummy worms. And yes I was an adult, I was celebrating my 25th year on this planet. 

I personally love this recipe.

I hope that you liked this recipe. Feel free to check it out for yourself. See you in the next post. Thank you.

Pinterest: Here

Recipe: Here

[nicascurls]

hey im new to your blog. sorry if these are repetitive questions!!!

first off i love your username. i am intrigued on your thoughts about niffany as i personally hate them with all my being. like genuinely it makes me sick people actually ship them .

second off id love to hear all your thoughts on GG theyre my beloved and their relationship with nica is so precious to me

third off i dont have any friends to discuss chucky with except one but she doesn’t really like the show so im rambling but ive wondered if its just me whos noticed the weird sexual scenes with the kids like in s2 when lexy is making out with that guy like isnt she 15?? and in s3 when jevon get intimate and all their making out scenes are so uncomfortable like tf is going on????

anyways i hope this isnt annoying and you have a nice day

Hi! 👋

There is no need to apologise. This ask has made me so happy! So, to answer your questions:

1. I do not like the idea of Niffany as a ship at all. Nica has been put through WAY too much and deserves a break and the ability to form some healthy relationships of any form, certainly not a romantic one with one of her abusers. (I adore Fiona and Jennifer, and their chemistry is great, but the characters being together or even just getting along is a big old no for me) That’s not even mentioning the creepy and tragic parallel of Tiffany being obsessed with Nica, the same way that Chucky was obsessed with Sarah. If others like it, that's their business, but personally, I certainly don't think it should be canon ever.

2. I love GG they are the sweetest, and I am so glad that they still have a relationship with Nica. I honestly think that right now, in the series, Nica's close bond and daily contact with GG is the only thing that is keeping her somewhat grounded. Although, I would have also preferred for the twins to stay in their human form (maybe in a way that GG the doll could still be alive but their own person if that makes sense)

3. You are absolutely not the only one, I definitely find it weird how much all 3 of the trio are sexualized. I mean, even in season 1, it was implied that Lexy was wanting to have sex and some of her dialogue felt way too sexual. Especially considering that Alyvia would have only been 13 when they started filming season one! And then, yeah, she had that scene at the start of season 2 and then the whole thing about making 'thirst trap' tiktoks in season 3 and Jake describing her as a 'sex pot'. Once again, Alyvia would have only been 15 when filming that scene. It just feels so unnecessary. (Don't even get me started on how Alyvia was 15/16 whilst Jackson who plays Grant was 21/22, I'm not blaming the actors but the creators being okay with that feels icky to me).

Then we have the very obvious increased sexualisation of Jake in season 3 that seems to be purely because of Zach having been working out more. He is still a minor, and the constant scenes of him shirtless or in tight shirts once again feels unnecessary considering that.

And yes, the Jevon sex scene and cringey dialogue also feels unnecessary. I know teens have sex and that's normal, but that doesn't mean it needs to be shown on national TV. If I'm honest, I feel uncomfortable enough watching scenes like that when the actors are adults but playing characters who are minors. But when the actors themselves are minors too, Zach would have been 16/17 when filming, and Bjorgvin would have been 17 or literally just turned 18 within the past week or so.

It's not so much what is shown or implied that I have the biggest problem with, more the context that it is grown adults who are thinking of and writing the scenes for minors and directing minors to do that in front of a camera.

Anyway, thank you so much for your ask, anon, you're not annoying me at all, and I'm glad you like my username. Have a nice day! 😊

[monkigoblin]

Yeah my bad regarding the quarter of a billion dollars things. Obviously i typed that figure without thinking about it too much. Regardless, we should get into the nitty-gritty of your response.

Admittedly I'm not to familiar with all of the logistics of zoning laws, outside of that being a state-level thing and not a federal thing and the variety in regulations that brings. I don't even think i mentioned building more houses on that post, but i mention people struggling if not completely unable to provide safe and suitable lodging for themselves. To clarify Acting like building more houses will help the people who can't even afford an appartment would be foolish and it was not what i was trying to convey. My point was very much supposed to be, "great something is being done about the fish, what about the people"? That being said new houses do need to be built. But a more effective way to directly

Now onto wages, what i was initially talking about and what prompted this response from you. Honestly it sounds like we are pretty much on the same page regarding that topic. Although i think there was a misunderstanding, which probably my fault as well. I wasnt trying to suggest that the government could spend momey to raise wages, but they are responsible for keeping the federal minimum wage consistent with the cost of living.

I think where we do disagree is the primary reason wages have been pretty much stagnant since i was 12 years old. It sounds like you mainly think that its issue is solely a Republican issue, and I'm sorry but i think thats a naive take. I think the system is corrupt of both sides, and i believe both parties are responsible for accepting what affectively amounts to "bribes" from big corporations. To keep wages down for as long as possible.

This is embarrassing for me, but i am in fact a member of a poor/marginalized group. My brain is essentially a cocktail of mental issues, I'd rather not go into any further detail on this account. I have been homeless and in and out of homles shelters for the decade that I've been out of my folks place (before you go saying my math is wrong again, i got booted out of there when i was 16 for smoking pot, and because my of my mental issues). The point i am getting at here is that 40% figure that you mentioned is completely ineffective, largely due to corruption.

Homeless shelters for example are especially corrupt, and its impossible to know that unless you've actually been privy to those issues. You may of been told that Biden did something to change those issues, but i promise you from firsthand experience it was absolutely ineffective at best and an outright lie at worst. That isn't to say its specifically his fault, i sincerely doubt it is. In fact its a complex issue with a lot of moving parts and a lot of people to blame, but those people are realistically on both "relevant" sides of the political spectrum.

Besides that i think we agree on pretty much everything you touched on. I do think that it behooves to mention that the government is unfathomably influential and has an unimaginable amount of spending power. Which makes any and all excuses as to why we have these issues sound like complete bullshit.

In the 1930s, the US put lots of dams along the Columbia River to provide power and prevent flooding. As a side effect, it destroyed the salmon populations of the upper Columbia River and its tributaries, because salmon have to be able to migrate out to the ocean and back. (They live most of their lives in the ocean, but come upriver to spawn.) The local tribes have been trying to figure out a way of restoring salmon habitat ever since.

The Biden administration just committed $26 million to build infrastructure that will allow fish to bypass dams, and also help with the tribal studies on the best way to reintroduce salmon to the area. And the programs they've agreed to fund were developed by the tribes, so native voices will have a strong say.

[homophyte]

OKAY plants update: just now i replaced the pebbles in the pebble trays of all the nepenthes except Moe with a whole bunch of marbles i just had, around, for reasons. i cleaned everything nice including the trays themselves and the pebbles will go back where they came from, eventually. what you can also see in this second picture here is the new ventrata pitchers on these babies! im expecting that big one on the left to pop open any day, which is nice. im definitely happy to see those start to accelerate their growth (nice leaf jumps!) so now im just waiting on the gayas to hopefully improve, hopefully.

next up is Moe herself cause theres a few things going on that are all connected, as far as i can tell. i forget if ive said this before but Moie right now has a bunch of basals (four, as far as i can tell-- you can see really well the different stems from left to right in those top two pics) and ive decided this time to just leave them, for two reasons: 1, i dont really have the space or desire to separate them and 2, i kinda wanna see what happens if i leave them? ive heard its possible that basals make more pitchers than the main stem so, well see. there ARE some babies on them--one of which is really big and will probably open soon but whether it will be MORE is...i dunno.

what i DO know is that the resource demands that the basals have--which is a lot, since their leaves are big and getting larger all the time and theyre making pitchers--is draining the main stem. not enough to kill it, mind, im not worried about that but enough that its noticeably not doing as good as it was. for one, the new leaves take much longer to form and when they do theyre smaller, and not only smaller but each new one is seemingly smaller than the last. its just not an energy priority to keep making them and keep making them big. the other thing is this:

which honestly i dont actually know if its related to the basals. this is the newest formed pitcher, the one it made in july, and, like. i dunno this makes me sad. obviously the worse case here is rot, which id have to cut and probably will anyway. im not super worried about it spreading to much of the other plant from this but it would be for certain a bad sign. what i think this more likely is is just..natural pitcher aging and death. they brown and dry from the tips down. the only confusing thing is that this is the YOUNGEST pitcher or, like, the one youd expect to die LAST. i dunno what thats about but my suspicion is that because the basals are being very energy demanding right now and probably will continue to be, the plant is diverting energy away from keeping its other newest growth in tip top shape, so you get smaller new leaves and the newest pitcher dying. i dont know that for sure, but ill be keeping an eye out to tell as closely as i can, cause this definitely just...feels bad.

next steps are basically winter prep! i have artificial lights to supplement daylight for all the neps, i know i can maintain humidity, i have a plan for the sarracenias dormancy. i wanna give basically everything some nice big meals before Bugs become a bit scarcer in the winter--im considering purchasing those fish food things people feed to pitchers even but i dunno how necessary that really is..whats left is two main things.

1 is repotting the sarracenia because Holy Moly did it get big fast. it keeps making new pitchers and theyre SO huge they just crowd each other like crazy and get deformed, but even with repotting i dunno how much of that i can change. probably the best for that is separating it from the rhizome but i also kinda dont want to do that? it just looks nice all full like this--and also it would be something to do at the end of dormancy, in the spring, definitely not now. i should also do this like....frankly asap. november is about when ill need to move it to its dormancy spot and thats not that far off! i want to give it some time to adjust to the larger pot size before, and if i wait too long ill have to do it after dormancy which like, i could do and it would be fine but honestly id just feel bad about having put it off. spring is the best time to make big changes for a reason but just upsizing the pot in a soft repot isnt actually big enough to justify waiting the same way separating the rhizome would be, for example.

2 is to change Moes set up. so like. i like Moes set up and from how well its thriving i think it does too but the fact of the matter is uhhh shes BIG. quickly becoming too big for the hanging pot its in now. i would not be surprised if she reaches my ceiling in another few months if i dont move her. the hanging basket is rn serving the dual purpose of supporting the vine--it would not be able to stand so well on its own and especially with how large it is its heavy enough to probably break under its own weight. so the plan is to make a moss pole with a pole my mom found and the moss i bought recently, and attach it to that instead. then i can take it out of the basket and put it on this lovely little plant stand i found instead! that will go basically in the same spot on the desk as the other plants are now. as much as i like the hanging look its not long term practical and really prevents me from moving or uhhh doing much of anything with Moe! its very hard to water and mist her cause i have to basically stand on top of the desk to reach and is basically in a lot of ways Pretty but not Optimal. with it NOT hanging ill be able to make changes and check stuff way more readily.

[moondonky]

Broke bitches

How the government always fucking broke,, they just had more money than the last 80 years combined,, like why, where's there audit,, and they take 40% of everyone else's money, inflation is controlled just a hidden tax, where the fuk is it all going , why do they keep raising the debt ceiling,, they suck at money, look around there not fixing anything, there not really building anything,, they toll everything make u pay for parking,, idk if it's just me but things seem dirtier.. like we just pulled out of a war that costed billions daily,, shouldn't we have more money, thy keep printing it I don't see a mountain of money... 30 trillion what are they buying,, is there even enough things to buy, would u b able to buy every single thing on this planet,,, thats alot of fucking money, where is it? U could buy all the gold in existence twice with that much money.. maybe not Ugandas recent discovery of like 13 trillion dollars worth of gold,, thats the other thing wouldn't the price of gold be declining,, didn't the supply just double... this is why I say everything is rigged and imaginary,, they don't really need money, there just keeping people poor at this point,, like people are peasants and they are bloodline royalty... isn't that like the opposite of why America became America,, or did I miss something studying history,, was it all bs where they lying, were they teaching us a bs story.. wasn't our money suppose to b backed by silver.. wasn't that in the constitution... everything happening,, did we vote for any of this, I'm pretty sure our founding fathers would yell treason... where the fuk is all the money... Money is worthless now why even keep working, they don't why should i, I ain't touching there cars rn.. lets see them do it.. let's see them do anything.. its there luxurious world thats burning, how we serve them is what's degrading, in no way are they a majority, they are there own tiny useless community..

I'm just gonna float,, I feel like I can tread longer.. I'll watch it I'm in the water, I'll watch it all burn down I'm not firefighter, even they are too busy fighting overdoses.. I don't think cops give af either, and that might be that people at the top arnt doing there job, they made things dangerous, they made things impossible, i wouldnt get in plane with those new pilots.. if ur gonna sit on the pot u better b fucking shitting,, if u gonna manage u better b good at it,, unlike the rest of the world,, u do not let the American people catching u fucking slacking,, if ur gonna be important show that your important that shits annoying... I really feel the world would be better off without them,, I honestly think it would immediately improve actually.. where the fuk is the money... and I know, I'm not stupid, I'm just stubbornly asking.. I already followed the money,, they were suppose to pay off the debt, they were suppose to balance the deficit... instead they put in there pockets they gave themselves bigger pensions, not to mention all the frivolous bs lawsuits that we end up paying for, they even took half of everyone's retirements,, that people worked thirty forty fifty fucking years for, they worked there entire lives for... I'm srry I'm not fucking doing that,, I'd rather live in a cave like wtf is that,, who tf does that, what a waste...

Effin millenial I'm urked,, I'm disappointed af,, when my grandma died I wasn't even allowed to go to the funeral, because of covid, because of liberal division,, even in my own family, I didn't know they were so weak,, I had to pray to pay respects.. I had to grieve by myself, that changed me, all that shit was for money, I ain't putting up with no fake shit no more,, I'm glad it's collapsing i hope it all dissapears... its all an illusion that's not gonna affect me.. I hope all that money melts like wax and I hope they get stuck in it.. I wanna see them work, I eanna see them struggle, I wanna see them sweat, i wanna see them carry shit, i wanna see them skip meals, I wanna see what they look like when there fatigued and exhausted, I wanna see them with sum dirty hands,, I wanna see them do what I've been doing for the last twenty years.. and I wanna see if they can keep a smile on there fuckin ugly faces. They look like demons, they act like demons, they think like demons, they do shit demons do.. so to me they fit the definition, they are demons

[queenassumption]

FROM NOW ON

I want to let go of what is boggling me these days since the birth of 2023 through this writing. It was the most pungent taste and sourest experience – starting from betrayal to forgiveness to patching up to reminiscing to questioning one’s self. Fate was a bully and I am its prey. I stopped being the social butterfly because no matter how pure my intentions were, people will always find ways to cut your wings and suffer. However, there is always something we could do about it and one of them is to achieve the “art of not giving a fuck”. But the news is, I was naturally born with my heart being one step forward than my mind. I want to have the other way around this year. God knows how much I prayed to make my feelings sturdier like a stone since I am tired of being emotional or being “too much” or “over” to everything – ecstatic, depressed, infatuated, infuriated, or aloof. I need to step up my game – to choose myself over anyone else. Second, on my list is that I have observed that I really do overshare. There are times that I want my mouth to be kept inside my pocket at all times. When I am already comfortable, I will non-stop talk about random things. As an ambivert, this socially active version of me is sometimes haunting to my introverted side. I want to be alone too but boredom will choke me to death. I am confused already about where should I stand. Strange! I want to be the best version of myself each and every day. The only way is up or straightforward. Collect all the pain and turn them into life lessons. No matter how thick the blood is nor how strong the bond is, in a blink of an eye, you are always on your own. Forgiveness and reconciliation are one of the prettiest gifts but these things can sometimes be temporary. Experience is what I believe is the most genuine thing you can be proud of. And speaking of experience, it feels right to be always in pairs. Like black and white, left and right, sun and moon, up and down, etc. And in numbers, odd for me is odd. Like in friendship, when two friends are having fun and in deep connection, the third one can just simply smile and laugh at the side nor watch and support them from afar. In my 25 years of existence, in different eras and timelines, I always experience being the “third” one. So, one of my resolution this year is to drop the term “best friend” officially but they will all be called “close friends” or “treasured friends” which I like the sound of it better. The memories are like playing your favorite cartoon show on a compact disc but once scratched, it will never display a clear video again. In a different scenario, there are also what we called “leeches” in our life. They know that you are something to them in the present so they will be around you in the most and best version of themselves with their fingers crossed at their back. They are hungry parasites that have hidden agendas. So, if the shoe fits, it doesn’t look good on you so better jump out of the pot before the water gets hot. These are all the weights that I have faced today but through writing this, honestly, I feel a lot better and I just wanted to share this with everyone who managed to read this at this part. I am sure that God has better plans for me. He will give me a sharper vision, a mind that can decode more easter eggs, and a stronger heart.

[rodr1cks]

Hi! I don't know if your request are open, but I'd like to know if you could write a rodrick x reader where the reader is Rowley's sister and discovers her talking on the phone with a friend saying she's in love with Rodrick and tells Greg and he tells her that Rodrick has been in love with her for a long time and they try to put them together?

cw: none it’s pure fluff

word count: 1.8k

“I know! And he didn’t even apologize!” Greg ranted into the receiver.

“I’m sorry, Greg,” Rowley frowned, sympathetic nature as present as always. “Anyways, mom says dinner is ready, see you tonight?” Rowley’s tone lifted at the end of his sentence, excitement brewing as he thought about the sleepover he was meant to have with Greg later that evening.

You slid into the kitchen on your socks, just as Rowley was concluding his conversation with Greg.

Rowley sat anxiously through dinner, quickly consuming everything on his plate, including the vegetables. You observed him from across the table, cocking your head as your younger brother inhaled his peas like he hadn’t eaten in days.

He took his last bite before exclaiming, “I’m going to pack my stuff for Greg’s!”

Not without clearing his dishes first, of course.

You rolled your eyes at his charisma and headed into the living room. You slumped over on the couch, limbs splayed every which way as you called your friend, Marissa. You had been needing to gush to somebody about your newest crush, Rodrick Heffley.

You had only interacted with the messy haired boy in passing: family dinners, picking up Greg, dropping off Rowley, etc.

“I don’t know what it is, he’s just so- so- captivating. God, Mar, I swear I could watch him play drums for hours on end!”

Unbeknownst to you, Rowley had entered the room and was about to speak. You were too caught up in drooling over Rodrick to notice. “Hey, y/n-” He cut himself off quickly, curiosity getting the best of him.

“And did you see what he was wearing at Matt’s party? Those jeans? And that eyeliner? God I could just tear them-”

Rowley cleared his throat, unwilling to hear the rest. “Y/n can you take me to Greg’s, please?” He stood awkwardly with his lips pursed.

Your head whipped around faster than the speed of light. “Marissa, I gotta go.”

“Rowley, how much of that did you hear?”

He lied, something he wasn’t really good at, “Not much! I promise!”

“Rowley Jefferson you had better keep your mouth shut, or I swear I’ll-”

You stopped yourself, closing your eyes and drawing in a deep breath. “Just get in the car.” You breathed out in a scarily calm tone. Your red headed sibling nodded frantically out of fear and darted to the garage.

Usually, you would make him walk, but ever since your infatuation with Rodrick began, you were more eager to give him rides over there. The mere prospect of getting the slightest glance sending excitement throughout your entire being.

When you pulled up to the Heffley home, you gave him a final glare. “Say nothing.” He gave you the same shaky nod he gave you only moments ago. With that, he was bounding towards the front door. You made sure he got inside safely and drove off.

“Rowley? Everything okay?” Greg asked his friend, concerned with his behavior. Rowley couldn’t handle keeping secrets. His hands grew clammy and a slight sweat broke out on his forehead. Rowley had an uncomfortably fake smile plastered on his face as he tried to assure Greg that everything was just peachy.

All it took was one knowing look from Greg and Rowley broke.

“Alright, fine! I heard my sister talking to her friend about how hot Rodrick is and how she wants to-”

“Okay, okay! I get the picture!”

Greg took a moment to proceed, his brows furrowed as he brought a contemplative fist up to support his chin.

“Lemme get this straight. Your sister likes my brother?”

Rowley nodded slowly.

“Y/n likes Rodrick?”

Rowley nodded again, confirming Greg’s exclamations.

“But y/n is smart a-and hot!”

“Greg! Don’t say that!” Rowley groaned, rolling his head back in disgust. Greg threw both of his hands up in defense, “I’m just stating facts.”

“Wait, I have an idea.” A pit of dread grew in Rowley’s stomach, Greg’s ideas never turned out well.

“What if we set up y/n with Rodrick? Just hear me out, this could be good for him.”

Rowley mulled the idea over in his head, thinking that maybe dating you could make Rodrick more… agreeable? Maybe you could be a good influence on the intimidating teenager. A happier Rodrick would make sleepovers at Greg’s a lot more pleasant.

“I think that could work,” Rowley said apprehensively. “But how do we do it?”

Greg shrugged, “Simple, we just tell Rodrick there’s a really hot Girl interested in him.”

The boys proceeded to draw up a plan.

Phase one: The approach. Greg and Rowley nervously ascended the wooden steps that led to Rodrick’s room. Rodrick was laying on his back, spinning a drumstick between his nimble fingers.

He shot up immediately when he noticed the boys’ presence. “What are your dweebs doing up here?”

Phase two: Delivery. “Calm down Rodrick, we have some information you might wanna know,” Greg reasoned cooly, easing Rodrick’s anger from a roaring ten to a mild six.

Greg nodded over at Rowley, signaling him to start talking.

“W-well,” Rowley stuttered, “I uhm- heard my sister talking about you and she- she likes you and she was talking about your jeans?”

Rodrick blinked in confusion, processing this intel.

“Your sister likes me? Are you sure she meant me?”

“That’s what I said!” Greg exclaimed and Rodrick shot him a terrifying glare, silently telling Greg to can it.

Rodrick was honestly shocked. He always observed you from afar, deciding himself that a chick as cool as you would never go for him. This news was absolutely world shattering for the boy, he completely admired you.

Phase three: Action. “We have a plan.” Greg said, a conniving grin creeping onto his face. “Rowley calls y/n, tells her that he’s feeling sick and blames it on Mom’s pot roast or something. Then when she rushes over all worried, you greet her at the door. And then you work your Rodrick magic!” Greg smiled, abundant pride for his plan evident in his stature.

“It’s a go.” Rodrick declared, scrambling around his room to put on deodorant, a new t-shirt, and cologne before pointing at Rowley. “Make the call.”

“Hey, y/n,” Rowley groaned into the phone, sounding as sick as he possibly could. “I- I think I ate something bad and I really need you ro come get me.”

You sighed, telling him you’d be there in ten minutes and to have his things ready to go. You departed for the Heffley house for the second time that night.

When Rowley didn’t come out to your car, you trudged up to the red door to go retrieve the sickly boy.

You gave the door three lazy knocks, expecting Rowley’s face to be the one behind it when it swung open. “Hey kid, are you feeling okay?” You asked, not yet making eye contact with the figure leering in the doorframe.

Your eyes widened as you came to realize who it was.

“Funny seeing you here,” Rodrick drawled out, a smirk tugging at his lips. Your cheeks burned with the heat of one thousand suns, you were not expecting this tonight.

“Y-yeah,” you smiled awkwardly, staring at your feet. “Rowley called, he uhm, he’s not feeling well. So if you could just get him for me I can leave. Immediately.” You cursed yourself for your blubbering idiocy as you twiddled your fingers.

“Actually, Rowley is feeling much, much better.” Suspicion grew as you studied Rodrick’s devious expression. “What’s going on?” You asked, genuinely puzzled as nothing was making any sense.

“I don’t know, y/n. Why don’t you come in and tell me?” Rodrick was surprisingly smooth in this situation, despite his nerves being at an all time high.

“Rowley is just up here,” Rodrick said while guiding you up the stairs to his room. In the meantime, Greg and Rowley peered out from the hallway, watching you follow Rodrick upstairs and giggling to themselves.

The overhead lights in Rodrick’s room were turned on, the glow from his string lights illuminating the area instead. “Mood lighting,” as he had called it. Rodrick had already instructed the boys to stay far away once you had arrived.

You were still lost, Rowley nowhere in sight. “So? Where is he?” You asked expectantly.

“Here’s the thing y/n. You know Rowley can’t keep secrets, right? I mean you have to know that, he is your brother”

Shit.

“That little shit stain! I’ll get him, I swear to god!” You turned to bound down the stairs, ready to tear the entire house apart in hunting for him. Rodrick grabbed your wrist before your foot could even reach the first step.

“Y/n, relax, relax!” His grip on your flesh made your breath hitch and stomach churn. “It’s okay, I feel the same way.” Rodrick’s cocky facade dissipated into nothing as he revealed his feelings.

You got a glimpse of a more vulnerable side of Rodrick that you were sure he didn’t typically share. “But girls like you don’t usually like stupid guys like me,” Rodrick was staring at the ground now, grasp on your arm softening.

You were too unsure of your words so you opted to move your free hand to hold his bicep, closing a considerable amount of distance between the two of you in the process.

“Rodrick, I’ve never liked anybody as much as I like you. And I don’t mean that in a weird or creepy way it’s just that-”

Now it was time for Rodrick’s own addition to the plan. Phase four: The kiss.

Your rambling was cut short by a pair of warm lips pressing against your own. He kissed you with just enough force to cause you to stumble back a bit, causing you to brace yourself against his torso.

He carded a gentle hand through your hair and tugged back on your soft locks. You moaned at the vibrations tendrilling at your scalp and kissed him with even more ferocity.

Somehow, you ended up on his bed, straddling him. The blankets strewn across his mattress melded against your knees and the fronts of your calves as you stabilized yourself on his lap.

He placed apprehensive hands on your hip bones, unsure of what was okay and what wasn’t. You placed your hand on top of his larger one, assuring him that you were comfortable. You even allowed a small whimper to leave your throat as he tightened his hold on you.

You only pulled away to catch your breath, looking into his eyes for the first time that night. You smiled warmly at him as you cupped his cheek. Suddenly, Rodrick’s signature smirk returned to his face.

“Now tell me what you were saying about my jeans.”

[astaroth1357]

"Hi kinda new. I don't know if this is where requests go, but if you haven't done it yet can I request an MC sneaking into the boys beds?" ~irenethehotdog

The MC Sneaks Into the Brothers' Beds While They're Asleep

@irenethehotdog don’t worry, I found ya anyway. 😁 Sooo there was a kind of tender way I could have played this… but then there was a funny way. I hope you're alright that I went with the funny way. 😅 I got two bed requests that are kind of similar-ish but how I’m interpreting them makes them just different enough to warrant two different asks. Here's the first one!

Check out my Masterlist for more!

Warning: Comical nudity? Is that NSFW-ish?

Intro:

Sometimes everybody needs a little comfort, especially in the middle of the night. Any number of things could have drawn the MC out of their bed: bad dreams, nagging thoughts, just general fear of the darkness of Hell that surrounded them, but they decided to try to soothe their unease with the company of their demonic housemates! Wonder how that turned out for them..?

Lucifer

I mean, if you’re feeling a little alone at night, maybe a little scared, it would only be natural to want to seek solace with the strongest person in the nearest vicinity, right? ...Right?

To say it was maybe ill-advised to just climb into bed with Lucifer would be an understatement… Frankly, if the enchantments he had on his door weren’t specifically meant for Mammon then they might have ended up in a very compromised position. But somehow, they managed to infiltrate the demon’s private sanctuary and get right up to his bed.

Now, Lucifer is not a heavy sleeper. Not at all. He’s grown pretty accustomed to waking up at all hours of the night because of his brother’s antics, so he felt the shifting weight on his mattress almost instantly.

They probably weren’t expecting him to suddenly jerk upright and spin towards them, fireball in hand ready to lob at their face... but that’s what they got.

After realizing that it was just the human and not Mammon coming in to take his stuff again, he made them sit down in front of his fireplace while he gave them a looong lecture about personal boundaries and how it’s really not smart to sneak up on demons like that… 

But he was still sympathetic to their sleep-deprived state so he offered them some tea and Devildom sleep remedies in hopes of getting them back to bed. ...Just not his. Back to your bed with you, MC.

Mammon

Mammon was their “babysitter.” Their protector. Their guardian. So why wouldn’t they want to go to him on a difficult night?

Getting into Mammon’s bed was hardly a challenge, sure they had to tiptoe through the garbage heap that made up his bedroom floor but it wasn’t Mission Impossible or anything…

What did catch them off guard was just how… not clothed he felt after they slid in under his covers. Like, pretty much wearing nothing at all. Not even a pair of courtesy boxers. 😓

It was their squeal as they flung themselves out of the bed that actually woke Mammon up. They had him ripping the covers off, ready to leap into action and everything, which definitely didn’t help matters. (Or maybe it did, depending on your point of view 🤷‍♀️).

Both parties pretty much turned into a cursing/blushing mess as he shot them embarrassed, rapid-fire questions while desperately trying to pull on some sweats. Meanwhile the MC stayed plastered up against the wall of his bedroom, answering him in equally defensive shouts.

Eventually, their fuss woke up Lucifer who was quick to send both of them back to their respective beds. The House teased them mercilessly for weeks… How were they supposed to know Mammon slept naked??

Leviathan

Levi might be a… strange choice for bedmate at first glance (he doesn’t really even sleep in bed, but a tub hardly meant for two people). However, there’s a certain level of approachability to him, isn’t there? Considering his own struggles with anxiety, maybe they thought he could relate…?

They tried knocking on his door first, thinking he might have been gaming, but there was no answer. When they walked in and found the otaku actually asleep for once, it seemed like their wishes might have actually been granted!

...But then came the actual trouble of trying to get into bed with Levi to start with. There wasn’t really an easy way to squeeze their body in past his because the tub was so dang narrow…

Any rational person might have just given up on the venture, but not MC. Whatever's possessed them to want to sleep with this awkward shut-in has a pretty good hold on them yet.

Lack of sleep might have been what gave them the bright idea to just try and lay on top of Levi veeerrry sooooftlllly…. Which is how the poor demon woke up to them halfway straddling his waist in the middle of the night.

His remarkably high-pitched scream woke up the whole dang House and the sheer amount of force he used when trying to jerk out of the tub toppled it over… Even after many apologies (and a trip to go buy a new tub), Levi still double locks his door at night to this day… 😓

Satan

Really an odd choice there, not going to lie. They’re well aware of the possibility that they could accidentally wake him and he maaaay not be the best waker (what being Wrath and all) but if it’s irrational worries that got you down, why not go to the most rational person in the House? Sounds like a perfectly logical decision, right?

That might have been what their half-baked disillusions were telling them on the way to Satan's bedroom but actually standing in front of the sleeping man was a whole other story. They felt crazy, genuinely crazy… But they still slipped in under the covers anyway.

Satan stirred almost immediately and turned to face them… but his eyes could hardly keep focus and the look of dopey confusion on his face could have honestly made the perfect screen background. "Huuuuuh…? MC…? What're you doin' 'ere…?"

They kind of had to hold in a laugh while they explained that they just wanted to sleep next to him that night. Satan beamed them an oddly serene smile and just nodded. "Okaaay…" With that he seemed to roll over to go back to sleep… but his mind caught back up with him before his drowsiness did.

"Wait a minute..." Ah shit….

 Like Lucifer, Satan ended up giving them a pretty good lecture on boundaries and the like when he finally snapped out of his stupor. Thankfully he wasn't mad, just a little embarrassed that they had seen him like that. He offered them a good book or two to pass the time if they couldn't sleep, but sent them back to bed all the same.

Asmodeus

Asmo probably doesn’t get people coming into his bed with completely chaste intentions very often, but he’s by far the most emotionally in-tuned demon in the House. If they're after a little sympathy, best just go to Asmo right?

They weren't really sure what to expect when they walked into his room... Does Asmo sleep like a Disney Princess, hair and makeup done perfectly in defiance of all laws of beauty?

Does he sleep like a '60s housewife, with curlers in his hair and leftover chips of mud mask on his face?

Does he sleep like the god of all sex that he is, sculpted chest for the eyes to see and everything underneath laid bare like a honeypot of temptation??

The MC doesn't really get to know, because when they pulled back the covers to climb inside they were met by the sight of someone else's very naked ass taking up the spot where they thought Asmo should be.

They go back to their room willingly, dejected and maybe a little scarred... Apparently they were just too late to the party...

Beelzebub

Okay, everything about Beel screams “Hello! I’m a warm comforting teddy bear!”...aside from the hungry parts. It’s really not hard to see why they’d want to go to him if they’re feeling a little vulnerable.

They didn't worry too much about being quiet when they walked into the twins' room. Belphie could sleep through a rock concert and Beel wasn't too far behind him (as long as he wasn't hungry).

They figured that the tall twin wouldn't mind too much if they just crawled into bed with him… He had make a similar request of them before, it was only fair right?

As they were preparing their tired body for a good night's sleep, they gently pulled the covers back next to Beel but they probably weren't expecting to find so many food wrappers surrounding him… or bags of chips… or packages of cookies… or-

Apparently Beel had yet another sleep-eating run and this time he seemed to have brought the whole kitchen back with him. There was hardly enough room left for Beel anymore, let alone the MC!

Considering their options were to either wedge themselves between a havoc roast and a bag of jerky or just brave one more night on their own, they cut their losses early and went back to their own bed...

Belphegor

They didn’t have to know Belphie since Day One of being there to pick up on how hard he slept. The man was pretty much in a coma for most of the day and that included his nightly rests too. Would he even notice if they… per say… slipped into bed with him to get a little comfort from their nightmares? Surely, he’d stay asleep, right?

When they didn't see his sleeping form in the room he shared with Beel, the MC eventually found Belphie up in the attic room. His little hideaway with a plush-ass bed to boot.

They didn’t bother being quiet at all. They figured that Belphie could have stayed under for anything short of banging pots and pans in his ears so why try to mask their footsteps?

They never expected him to be awake. 😰

The moment they lifted the covers, Belphie struck like some kind of blanket crocodile! He grabbed them by the waist and dragged them into the spot of the bed right under him with a impish grin on his face.

Turns out they weren't the only ones having sleeping problems that night and as they felt the full weight of his worn out body settle in nicely up against theirs they knew that maybe, finally, they'd get a good night's sleep… 🤭